#Sorry if this sounds like I'm nitpicking. I'm trying my best not to despite my dislike for this game

[0heartangel0]

PERSONA 5 TACTICA IS NOT GREAT: A VERY ODDLY-CONSTRUCTED RANT

Pt. 2: The Phantom Thieves With No Heart

We'll start things off by bringing up what I said earlier about the characters and how I don't think the vast majority of them are any good, with only the three exceptions mentioned previously.

"But wait," I might hear you ask. "You said two out of the three were Futaba and Yusuke. Does that imply that the rest of the thieves aren't as good by comparison?"

And to that, I say, ".......yes."

I don't know what happened here, but the Phantom Thieves aren't Phantom Thieve-ing. And by that, I mean, not only are they written rather bland, but they contribute almost *nothing* to the plot, outside of the obvious combat segments that are just there for gameplay's sake. They might have a *few* moments here or there, but when I say "few", I MEAN "few".

To make things easier in order to get my point across, I'm gonna go down the list of Phantom Thieves that aren't Futaba and Yusuke, starting with:

ANN TAKAMAKI

I'm gonna be honest here: I can't think of a *single* moment Ann had any relevance or contribution to the plot or any character development outside of when she was brainwashed by Marie at the beginning of the game, and even then, you could make the same argument for every other thief that wasn't Morgana or Joker.

There's also the aforementioned Samurai scene, but it's there to run the same joke of, "Ann's a terrible actress". I will admit, it is funny, and Yusuke saves it by spinning it, saying she's wasted, but my point still stands. And as I've stated, this is one of two optional scenarios, so you might not even see this scene.

At least in Strikers, Ann gets the first arc, where she relates to and sympathizes with Alice Hiragi, our first antagonist. Tactica leaves her out to dry.

Also, in the first arc, Toshiro constantly brings up her leather suit, and it gets old and uncomfortable real fast.

So, yeah. Ann gets nothing. She loses.

MORGANA

Morgana is the same old same old, but that isn't saying much, because....it's Morgana. He serves as your tutorial guy for the beginning, while constantly correcting people that he is indeed not a cat (except that he is, don't deny what is the truth).

The only thing I can compliment him on is how he calls Lavenza "Miss Lavenza". I don't know, it's cute. It shows how much he respects her (don't know if I should call them siblings, considering Morgana's origins).

Aside from that, I really have nothing else to say about Morgana. I never liked Morgana to begin with, and that still holds true in Tactica.

MAKOTO NIIJIMA

Makoto has never really been my favorite Phantom Thief by any stretch of the definition, but even I can tell that they did her dirty here.

Once again, she does nothing for character growth or plot, and is left for some cheap jokes that usually result in her threatening someone's life. I can only think of *one* time she did something for the plot, which was ask Futaba to hack into Yoshiki's cameras to show the citizens what the camps have been doing to the people taken there.

But aside from that, that's all Makoto really contributes....

...which makes it all the more aggravating when you remember that Makoto's supposed to be the TACTICIAN of the group!

EVEN THE GAME SAYS SO!!

But you want to know the real kicker here? While Makoto doesn't do any strategizing, you know the characters that DO?

Toshiro and FUTABA!

Okay. To an extent, I get Toshiro. But Futaba? She's the HACKER. I mean, in regards to what she should hack and the timing of it, I understand, but not full-on strategy on the WHOLE operation! And even if you want to include Futaba into this, why not include Makoto as well?? If you want to push the idea that she's the strategist of the Phantom Thieves, then have her participate in this discussion!! I love Futaba as much as the next guy, but it's clear to me the writers or someone on the writing team *really* liked Futaba.

What I'm trying to say is, just give Makoto her role back, man! Because apart from that one moment (plus her losing her cool at an aizen during the Samurai/Geisha scene), she really has nothing else.

HARU OKUMURA

Okay, in all fairness, even in the first game, Haru really didn't have much going on. There's a reason "Haru Didn't Get Enough Screen Time" became a meme. She was only ever relevant for the Okumura arc, where she teams up with Morgana during his split with the PT, and after some running around and whining, he makes up, and Haru joins, wanting to change her father's heart. Then he dies, she gets sad over it, and she then proceeds to just fade in the background for the rest of the game.

That isn't to say Haru wasn't a good character. She was decent. The problem is, due to her lack of screen time and contribution (and Morgana), she never really had a chance to develop as a character, especially with her comrades. I'd argue that if you took her out of the original game, the thieves' dynamic and the story as a whole wouldn't change by much.

Then Strikers swooped in and saved her character. Due to the nature of it being a sequel, the game understands that we don't need to reintroduce the characters again, and just lets them have fun. And boy, did they have fun with Haru. Not only did she get two funny running gags - one of which being paid off through means of her almost killing her friends - but she gets an entire arc focused on her, where she reconnects with an old friend that has lost her way due to guilt and blackmail. It's so touching, and shows just how much Haru has grown as a character from the first. Screw the Okumura arc, replace it with the Sapporo arc! Also, she's terrifying.

I was then expecting Tactica to follow through with this, giving us a very adorable, yet sadistic floof ball. But... no.

Just like everybody else here, she serves no purpose to the plot, she's been soul-sucked, giving zero laughs or character development whatsoever-

Okay, that's a semi-lie, because she actually has one scene.

While infiltrating Marie's castle, the gang come across a room, where a projector plays a video of real-life Marie treating Toshiro like crap, even calling him her "puppet". It's here where Toshiro remembers that Marie is his fiance arranged to him by his father, who only did it to boost his political career (and money) due to Marie being the daughter of a rich ceo to a conglomerate.

Marie, however, as shown in the video, has never cared for Toshiro, and only agrees to marry him in order to gain the status and power as a wife to a prime minister.

It's here where Haru begins to empathize with Toshiro's plight, having also gone through the hell of being forced into an arranged marriage with a horrible human being for the sake of the family business.

It's great that the game acknowledges this similarity and uses it to have two of our characters relate to their hardships and grow together as a result.....for this one exchange.

Those four screenshots I showed? This is the only time Haru ever talks about this with Toshiro, or has a moment like this with him. 'Cause after she says this, it's never brought up again. It's such a waste, too, because they could've done something here, but they chose not to. And for what?

Okay, okay! There's ANOTHER moment Haru has in this game. And it's in a Quest she has with Yusuke, where she tries to test Milady's psio powers to drag enemies to her so she can easily take them out due to her axe being heavy to carry around. After the quest, she reveals that when she was a child, she used to try chopping wood in the garden. When her father found out, he got angry and told her not to do it again. In an act of rebellion, she continued in secret. She later found out through one of her helpers that her father had known she was still doing it. Yusuke and Joker conclude that it was probably her father's way of showing his affection and kindness towards her, with Haru agreeing, saying that that's why she's attached to her axe, for it's a reminder of her courage and when her father wasn't a crazed lunatic was kind.

I honestly love this quest for this story. We get to learn more about Haru, and even add a little more nuance into Okumura before he formed a palace, making Haru's determination to change his heart, and sadness when he died make more sense.

I just wish we got to see more of this in the main plot rather than a side quest. Can-

Can we just stop being mean to Haru for once?!

RYUJI SAKAMOTO

*Sniff* Ryuji....what did they do to you, man?

I keep beating a dead horse here, but Ryuji serves no purpose outside of being the comic relief half the time when Toshiro isn't available to be the resident punching bag. And even then, I can't think of a single funny moment Ryuji had in this game, apart from that one quest, where him and Makoto bring back a box from town square, only for it to contain a bunch of Yoshiki merch, and everyone pawns it off on him. BUT THAT'S IT!

And it saddens me because it's RYUJI! If not for Zenkichi, Ryuji would be THE best boi to me. Both P5 and P5S gave him so much, usually being the best part of both games for me. And it's not just because he was funny (although he is). He always had the gang's back and would risk everything for them, like when he almost died when trying to get the thieves a lifeboat when Shido's palace was collapsing (we don't talk about the aftermath of that). In Strikers, he stands up to and screams at a disembodied voice in order to defend Sophia, whom he considered as a dear friend, especially given the voice was calling her worthless and purposeless - something he's heard other people call him all his life (I hate it when people boil this scene down to, "He sAiD tHe F-bOMb, gUys!", 'cause there's more to it).

So, with all that said, these examples puts more a perspective of just how butchered he was in this game, since he's never given a moment like this. The closest we get is of a Memo stating he's like this, but we don't see it in action. He's just....THERE. And that's the worst you can be as a character.

Much like everyone else, he gets nothing of importance. Nothing, except some Yoshiki merch.

REN AMAMIYA / AKIRA KURUSU / PEEPEE POOPOO / BABY GIRL / HARRY MOBUS-

(You know what? For the sake of no discourse on the canon name, we'll be referring to him by his codename, ironically the only canon name he has.)

As the silent protagonist, you might think I wouldn't have much to say about Joker. But that's where you're wrong.

Ever since P3, despite their roles as the silent protagonists, each one always gave an air of personality.

Makoto Yuuki (P3 Protag) always went with the flow, giving off an "I don't care" attitude, with a side of depression, for he didn't seem to fear death.

Yu Narukami (P4 Protag) was a friendship-loving chad, who'd do anything for his little cousin, Nanako, and always strived to unveil the truth.

And then there's Joker. While appearing to be an average student, he's really a showboating trickster (God himself even gives him the nickname of 'Trickster'), who isn't afraid to joke around, even when the situation is dire. He'd do anything for his friends and strives to change society for better, even if society views him as the villain.

This personality carries over in Strikers, as you can see in both the way he acts in cutscenes, and a vast majority of his responses throughout the game:

(Watch it - you won't regret it)

So, when transitioning to Tactica, I guess Joker lost his personality along the way because, my God, is he boring in this game.

While I can tell you almost every funny dialogue option Joker has in P5 and P5S, I can't think of a single one here. Almost all of them boil down to the same generic answer, with no charisma or back-talking Joker's known for.

But, nothing, flippin' NOTHING, holds a candle to the most annoying thing they added to Joker. It was something I noticed the first hour or so into the game, and then proceeded to play a little game with myself to see how many times it happens. And it happened EVERY DANG TIME!

You see, at the end of every cutscene Joker's involved in (so, almost all of them), he does this nodding animation to close it off, and I don't know if I should find it funny or annoying.

That's all he does. He NODS!!

JUST-

....how did you butcher Joker?

WHY ARE THE PHANTOM THIEVES HERE?

No, really. Why are they here?

Heck, the game throughout constantly asks the question of why the thieves were dragged into the world of the Kingdoms, but at the end of the game, never provides a concrete answer.

Salmael does state that his offer of salvation "is not limited to [Toshiro]", but the fact he's doing all of this in Toshiro's mind tells me he had no intention of dragging the thieves in to begin with, and was only ever focused on Toshiro (I'll complain about that when I get to Toshiro).

You could make the argument that the reason they were dragged in was because they were in LeBlanc when it happened, and LeBlanc is supposed to be Toshiro's safe haven in his mind. But then, why drag Lavenza and the WHOLE VELVET ROOM then?? Doesn't that just give the thieves more firepower, since Lavenza can provide Persona fusions, and later, FIREARMS?? Why didn't he also drag in Igor, since Lavenza states she was intentionally dragged away from him when it all happened??? WHAT'S THE POINT OF THE THIEVES BEING THERE, APART FROM JUST BEING TOSHIRO'S UNPAID THERAPISTS?!

I'll tell you why! It's so they could label this as a Persona 5 game! And that's all she wrote!

It just disappoints me, because I like the PT, and to have them be watered down to this leaves me feeling...empty. And sad. And depressed.

And this is just the OLD characters. I haven't even gotten to the NEW ones! I won't be discussing them for the next few parts, but just know: I have a lot to say about them, and none of it is good.

Pt. 1

Pt. 3

[lexsnotdead]

I absolutely loved BG1 and 2, Neverwinter Nights Hordes of the Underdark and Neverwinter Nights 2 too are among my most favourite RPGs. But Larians writing, particularly in D:OS2 turned me off so much :( How different is BG3?

big wall of text under the cut and before anything else i want to say that criticizing a game does not equal not liking it

i thought a lot about my response to this ask, since i must admit i have never played bg&bg2 and jumped straight into the hype train of bg3. and i'm genuinely curious what exactly about dos2 turned you off that much. here's what i personally think:

i played d:os1 and d:os2 and while i'm a big fan of the latter… dos1 couldn't keep me entertained even when playing with a friend in coop, which shows just how exhaustively boring and unmemorable it was. i really love dos2 and despite what i will say next, nothing is gonna change my love for this game. but. imma be honest, it was 3 and a half characters that kept me playing. i love sebille and lohse, i love malady — the mystery around her has its own appeal, but it's still a huge miss not to expand on such intriguing character as herself. i slightly care about ifan and fane, i couldn't give a lesser fuck about beast, i fucking hate the red prince and his writing is one of most unlikable from any rpg game i ever played (i can elaborate. but that's a post for another time). in short: lack of memorable characters, and those who are there have to make up in quality rather than quantity.

and larian is still... larian. their ambition makes them bite more than they can chew, you don't need to be nitpicking on purpose to notice just now empty act 3 of d:os2 was compared to fort joy or driftwood. in similar-ish way act 3 of bg3 feels less polished in terms of performance and content. like they even had to add an alternative ending to karlach's quest only after the game's release lol. there are quite a lot of bugs and players who are doing an "evil" playthrough like me found themselves deprived of content — sometimes you're just locking yourself out of quests, encounters, characters entirely because of decisions you made, quite literally making the game harder for yourself.

another important thing that i'd point out that dos2 felt kinda lacking in terms of the character creation because ocs always felt less immersive and shallow compared to the playable origins (i had the time of my life playing as lohse, tho). i know people who managed to have fun filling the blank spaces with their imagination, but i'm not one of those people, unfortunately. when i tried creating a drow character in bg3, however, every third npcs made sure to glare at me distrustfully and be fantasy racist towards the drow. like really? thanks for noticing! this might sound weird, but i liked that. it enhanced my feeling of immersion thus making it more satisfying to play. like yeees... yes... i indeed am a drow!

i'd rather stop focusing on its shortcomings because it feels unfair to larian when they are listening to the playerbase and trying their best to deliver patches as quick as possible. after all, what makes a good dnd adventure for me is always the story and characters — banal it may be, as long as it is fun, it is a good dnd game. and bg3 is very fun and addictive. there's this unique feeling when you're planning your next playthrough and considering what you would've done differently when still doing your first. i like it more compared to dos2, because... i'm not sure why myself? interpersonal interactions just feel a bit deeper, and i actually care about almost every companion, even the ones i did not expect to care about (like gale, astarion, shadowheart). and variety of the character creation, of course. and i can bet on bg3 being next the goty haha

to sum this all up:

if you like dos:2, you will like this game

if you like dnd e5, you will also like this game

if you like bg1 and bg2 then i genuinely don't know i'm sorry

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

hey. sorry to do this but i have to second what the other anon said re: your reply to the first(?) guy. you're dead right that you don't owe people complete agreement and that your blog is not their confession box. at the same time i think it's a pretty bad faith reading to interpret that ask as anon saying that trans men bottoming is gross. as far as i can see what they said is that lack of rep makes them FEEL gross. i say this with love in my heart as someone who has often fallen prey to it myself but i think you may need to check that your approach-everything-as-discourse switch is not switched on. responding to someone being vulnerable about their sexuality by nitpicking the possible political implications of their wording is not really necessary and a bit mean. anyway love you i hope you have a good day/night and enjoy your team fortress pornography

Looking back at it, I do think I was a bit harsher to that person than I should have been, especially since I have a lot of very similar feelings myself. I want you all to realize that whatever interpretation this has of my words is definitely not what I meant in any way. However, I am also under no obligation for every post I make to be perfect, and I am ESPECIALLY not well-equipped to perfectly answer something THAT personal which I was not prepared for and did not ask to receive. I think referring to what I said as me "approaching everything as discourse" is disingenuous. I don't think looking in on your feelings and asking yourself why you might have such a strong gut reaction to other trans people's expression is "discourse". I'm not saying that no one's allowed to feel that way (if you knew literally anything about me outside of this stupid comedy videogame blog, you would know I have a LOT of the same feelings myself), but I am asking people to think about how they express those feelings and try to not word them in a way that TO ME, IN THE MOMENT, sounded like it was somehow other trans people's fault or something. I'm a vers and allowing myself to feel good again about bottoming, which is actually very stigmatized for trans guys and "mascs" in general in a lot of spaces, is something that took a lot of work. Despite my best efforts, I too will have strong gut reactions to anything that posits either topping OR bottoming as like The Good Proper Trans Guy Thing To Do. If I had gotten an ask complaining about transmasc tops in the same way, I would have probably given the same response. I have feelings about this stuff too, and I don't really want these feelings to be a topic of Great Debate. Literally nowhere in my response did I tell that anon that they weren't allowed to feel the way they did, just to think about ways to word their response that doesn't accidentally put the blame on other trans people with different relationships to their bodies, which is something I am working on myself! I was too harsh and I do apologize to them, but I don't retract any of the actual content of what I said. I think if anything the issue should be viewed as "not enough transmasc top posts" and not "too many transmasc bottom posts". Everyone deserves to be "represented" and make content about what they like. I really DO hope that we get an increase in "representation" for transmasc tops, we ARE underrepresented and I talk about that on my nsfw sideblog literally all the time, I just don't think that should be done at the expense of posts about trans guy bottoms, which I understand now was probably not that anon's intention at all, but it's how I read it at the time. I am a human being and I will make mistakes sometimes. I am going to ask to please stop overanalyzing my feelings AND that random anon's feelings now. I really do not want this to be the next "discourse" or whatever on this blog

[becausethathappens]

Will you please write a super angsty fic where Link is freaking out because he thinks the wedding vows he has written aren't good enough and Rhett helps him go over them and make corrections and says they're perfect but also, just says the vows he would say for Link if it was them like it should've been because he's heartbroken and Link can tell but their hands are tied and they don't know what to do so they soldier on without saying a word, but wordlessly communicating lifelong love and misery and everything, maybe comfort as well?

i'm really really sad and i can't shake it off and i really want some good angst and hurt/comfort and i really love you, maura, you're awesome

I don't do unhappy endings, anon. I'm confident you don't either. In fiction or otherwise. So, pardon this if it’s not what you expected.

Please enjoy? This was done a little hastily to share it with you (and I should be writing other things per usual) but I've had a rough week and I want to hopefully make someone smile. (I have way angstier stuff in the drafts and I will be sure to get those out eventually, too.) You’ll feel better soon.  🤞  Thank you! 💞

-———————-

now or forever

4k - Rhett writes Link vows.

If you were my boy, Blue

I’d bathe you in honeys (sp?)

I’d sing write you a love song

I’d shoot you a star**

If you were my boy, Blue

There ain’t nothing in this life I wouldn’t give

From my heart, to my toes, to my fingers, my nose (**)

Whatever it takes just to watch you live 

continue to ‘ ’ grow with you like a vine ‘round a rose 

If you were my boy, Bue

I wouldn’t want you all for myself

There’s no star bright enough to match your lightin’

In sickness, blue, so certainly while we have health

Hand in hand, no longer fightin’

What’s destiny (**)

You and & me

If you were my boy, Blue

I'd marry you

&

Thank God for Rhett. Giving him, delivering him, blessing him with Rhett.

Link is in the middle of a spiral (what he’ll later recognize as a panic attack) when Rhett arrives, the eve of his wedding. Bailing him out of this with pen, paper, and a smile.

Link has always been good at improv.

Though Rhett tended to find the words to start. These were his own vows and Link has been putting time to sit and start them off for weeks. Now that he has to, he’s dumbfounded, despite being deeply in love.

Amidst all the planning and chaos, writing his vows was such a given that Link left it as priority sixty-seven on a list of many more.

Unfortunately, even as busy as they’ve been, that list was shredded with the “who gifted what” tracking sheet (both literally, accidentally, and figuratively) back around the bridal shower and it’s been anarchy ever since.

So he thanks God for Rhett, who’s here, to stop another needless disaster from happening.

That same generous God, however, watches him plagued with thoughts of utter devotion at Rhett’s willingness to drop everything on a weeknight and rush over to help Link find his words.

His lyrics, really, is what Link has in mind. Since they used to write songs together and this felt much the same. He’s been floundering all night and now that Rhett’s here, he knows he’ll at least get what he needs done. Even if it’s not all he wants, right now.

That same God seeks judgment on his every decision or flinch against His will, for any reason, to spite him.

For this reason.

He wants to smush Rhett’s face and kiss him. Deeply. He doesn’t.

Even if there were sometime in the past that he could get away with a platonic smooch, now he can’t. He simply could not prevent that from escalating.

So, he merely tightens his grip on the wrinkled scrap paper in his hand and scrunches his eyes.

“Why can’t it be you up there…” Link bemoans, loudly, in his frustration.

Rhett’s eyes widen, in horror, and Link slams his other hand at his mouth, rolling his eyes. “Not like - I mean - why can’t you go say my lines for me. You’re so much better at this kinda thing.”

“Let me read what you’ve got,” Rhett says.

After some review, Rhett sighs, not unkindly and sits down next to Link. “Let’s just talk through what you’re trying to say because, yeah, this reads like liturgy.”

“Ain’t is supposed to? It’s in a chapel!”

“What do you like about her?” Rhett asks, ignoring his nitpicking. “Christy?” Rhett stares at him, waiting, too upset for Link to chastise but clearly wanting to.

“She’s patient,” Link says, reminded by the similar. Rhett folds over the book to an open page and clicks the pen in his hand, writing that down. “A-And she’s kind. Like considerate, ‘specially with babies and little animals. Sh-She does this thing where she immediately drops to their eye-level to make sure they don’t feel unheard or seen. Probably ‘cause she’s always been so tall…”

Rhett’s still writing.

“Then when I’m sick, she forces me to rest. You know I hate that,” Link says, voice rising a little, at the memory. “But you know I need that. You won’t be the last to make me stop and smell the roses or take a break, once in a while.”

“Her hair, write, her hair - the way it looks in the sunshine. Like warm caramel with flecks of gold. She’s a vision, an angel. Especially when she’s wearing all white, like,” Link says, pausing to point to Rhett’s undershirt and pale grey sweats. “Makes blondes look ethereal-like, always has.”

“Oh, and her voice. Sometimes, the way her accent catches, well, you know she don’t like to sing like us, never has, but when she says certain things, asks a question the right way - it’s music. The way it harmonizes with my answer, reminds me of singing, reminds me of us.”

Rhett keeps writing, quiet, and focused.

After a short time, Link can’t stop and wants to crane over to see what he’s come up with. Rhett hands it over after crossing a final “t” somewhere on the page.

“Those’re good, Link, but I think you need to keep closer to what I wrote, leave out the stuff about me.”

“Stuff about you?” Link asks, having spoken in a stream-of-conscious style, Link forgets most of what he even said

Rhett looks away, shakes his head.

Distracted by the desire to read the rest, Link abandons the lingering questions he has about Rhett’s suggestion and response.

“These are great, man, thanks,” Links says, pushing a soft hand into Rhett’s side.

His eyes scan to the bottom where Rhett’s added a few lines about the journey, the marriage, all the ceremonial aspects of the day for him to close with, but then something more.

Something about him.

Rhett catches him catch it and looks further away. “I know Christy pretty well, too, y’know. Y’all are just alike, in that way. She might need some back-up vows, to have and hold.”

Link reads them.

“You know, just in case.”

Link looks up and tries to laugh.

He doesn’t laugh.

He goes back to reading them.

Rhett shifts uncomfortably, touches the back of his neck, and shuts his eyes.

“Rhett, these ’re…”

“I know, bo, you can forget ‘em,” Rhett excuses, still not meeting Link’s gaze. “You want me to… I can rewrite the others on a different - I can turn the page and write ‘em there so you can just…”

“Hey, hey,” Link interrupts him, mad at Rhett putting down his best friend, and eager to explain his actual thoughts. “Rhett, these are perfect. These are… I’m sad I can’t say anything as nice in return to you.”

Rhett finally looks up to acknowledge that and their gaze heats and lingers.

“Not that I…” Link stutters to clarify. “Y-You’d have to be a - if that’s something that was gonna - you know - if that was gonna work…”

His mind does it’s usual jump to a visual for the worst case scenario depicting the implication he stumbled across. Him out eight grand on the wedding. Not to mention a wife, a family, a future, a faith -

a friend -

Link gulps, pushing that back away, pushing them both forward, in his estimation.

It’s too much to bear to think about for another second. When he glances at Rhett, he can’t get a read on his face what he thinks about it, and that’s scary enough for him to want to abandon the concept altogether.

“Christy’s gonna love them.”

It’s enough, saying his fiancée's name, to ground him again. Enough to make it okay for him to grab Rhett’s palm and squeeze it in thanks, between them.

Rhett’s made his choice to give up on film school.

Link’s made his choice to give up on whatever schoolboy obsession he has with monopolizing all of Rhett’s days and nights. 

He’ll stick to the days or every other weekend, however they can still fit time together, is fine by him. This ceremony, tomorrow, feels as much about his graduation from friend to husband, and all that that entails.

They’re adults.

They both know there’s a lot of sacrifices to be made and this feels like the first time he’s really acknowledging how hard they’re going to be to make. He hopes they’ll still see each other.

He hopes their kids will get along.

He has a lot of hopes.

All of them involve Rhett.

There’s a lot he should write down for when Rhett finds his own bride to wed.

Link notices, suddenly, that Rhett is crying. The same part of him that's nearly broken the headwind of these conflicting emotions turns back to comfort him.

“Hey, don’t cry,” Link soothes, realizing he’s also still holding Rhett’s hand.

“‘M sorry,” Rhett intones, the words bubble up and out of him simultaneously, sounding like water draining in a filled sink. “And the night before your wedding, good Heavens.”

“Hey, I’ve been crying all week,” Link says, waving a hand at the stress that planning a wedding has kept put on him. “Nothing I haven’t seen in the mirror.”

Rhett laughs, rubbing a thumb over his own thigh in a way that brushes upwards against the place Link’s clasping his hand. Link nearly pulls his hand back, thinking Rhett’s trying to get him to sense his want for space, but when he meets his eye it’s clear he’d like nothing less.

“I think I’m just -” Rhett starts to say, trailing off. The light from the lamp on the far coffee table is the only thing on in the room. Link drops his gaze a few inches to try and see more of Rhett’s downturned eyes as he hems and haws. He squeezes their hands together, again, this time clasping it more firmly, still pressing Rhett’s large palm down from above. “I think I’m just a li’l jealous, is all.”

It’s the quietest admission he’s heard from Rhett since he told him he failed their chemistry mid-term in eleventh grade.

Link is also so lost at the innocence of the admission that he can only think of follow-up questions. “Of me?”

Rhett looks at him for a long, long minute and finally, when Link’s gaze remains confused for the whole length of the pause, he shakes his head, no.

Then he waits. 

He waits for Link to realize what he means.

But he’s still waiting when Link, oblivious, moves onward trying to comfort Rhett, instead of understanding him fully.

The tension in the room is palpable as Link talks, but only to Rhett, it seems. Only Rhett pictures air bags being deployed in a car safety video as metal hits cinder block. Only Rhett moves his hand, though it’s all it takes to dislodge them from each other completely.

“I know you’re gonna make an amazing husband some day.” Link is saying.

Rhett’s hand aches where cool air now surrounds it.

“I know your wife is gonna get to hear you say such wonderful things about her.”

Rhett wipes his hand of the misunderstanding on the cotton of his pants.

“I know she’s gonna say the same kind of things about you, when it’s your turn up there.”

Rhett mourns the idea that this would ever be requited.

“I know she’s gonna love you, just as much as I do, so she’ll have plenty to say.”

Rhett looks away, wiping the last of his tears from his eyes. 

 “I’ll make sure she has plenty of ideas where to start.”

Rhett pats Link’s leg, in camaraderie, and nods.

And that’s it. They shoot the shit, they make a plan to meet up at a donut place for the groomsmen’s breakfast to thank them for their help, before the ceremony, and they’ll talk things through if Link’s feeling jittery still. Then Rhett’s gone.

It’s not until the next day at eleven on the dot (everyone has an agenda to follow and every moment is accounted for) that Link understands Rhett’s pain.

His mother straightens his tie and flattens the edges of his suit. “You’ll wanna know I heard Christy looks like an angel in her dress, from the girls upstairs.”

“Those actual angels you been talkin’ to, Sue?” Rhett jokes, where he’s twisting his cummerbund around every so often, bored.

“Very funny, honey,” Sue ribs back. “From the cousins, Beth and Hailee Sue. Remember they’re friends with the hairstylist you got to do the curls for Christy’s hair, today? She was over last night getting Christy ready for bed with how to wash and dry it a special kind of way. They were there, too.”

Link starts to tune her out, since there’s a lot on his mind, but then she says more.

“She says the hairstylist was talking about how jealous she was of Christy, all night, getting to marry you,” Sue relays.

“Oh, mama, please,” Link dismisses. The compliments he’s been getting have felt faker than the toupee on his uncle Bruce. That girl has never even met him. “I’m the only person here people should be jealous of, who would be jealous of Christy,” he says, trailing off, muttering his reasoning as he did. “Marrying a trainwreck like me.”

Link looks up in the mirror where some of his friends continue to mingle in various states of undress. Rhett is already dressed, however, and staring straight at Link like he’s been caught with a hand in a cookie jar.

Link’s about to ask what’s wrong when he remembers his words. Then looks again over the planes of Rhett’s face.

Last night’s words slam back into his mind and Link’s mouth drops open.

The church organ belts out an opening flurry of notes before Canon in D begins playing loudly through the sound system built into the rafters above them. Link looks up to see one of the church staff at the door instructing them to join the bridal party to line-up.

Link’s mom dashes off to where she’s paired with her nephew, Link’s favorite cousin, to be escorted down the aisle.

Rhett sees Link’s face rushing through a wash of emotions from a distance, he nods to the staffer in silent understanding that he’ll handle it, and then they’re alone.

He walks up to Link and takes his hand. He squeezes it.

“Hey, you gotta go. We gotta go. It’s showtime,” Rhett insists.

Link looks around like a bomb went off, since in some ways it did, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Rhett seems to pick up on that. He squeezes Link’s hand again.

“I’ll get over it, Link, it’s okay,” Rhett whispers, on the verge of desperation.

That confirmation is enough to fully shatter Link.

Only for a moment. 

The music continues and Rhett keeps his hand hold.

They are adults. They are in love. They have to marry. 

None of these things can be helped.

“I’m gonna be so jealous of Her, too,” Link whispers back. He squeezes Rhett’s hand one last time, as they part.

They leave.

They walk straight.

They part again.

Until later.

They move houses and cities and states.

They move mountains, inside and out.

They move together.

Much later.

They join again.

They run crooked.

They return.

To one another.

Link has spent years worrying a ring that means too much to too few people.

In the beginning, when he cries himself to sleep at what he thinks has been the mistake of a lifetime, it’s His talisman. It reminds him of the expectations upon this life he’s made.

As the years pass, however, the adherence to the bogeymen of their childhood’s rules wears thin. It starts to strictly represent love and patience.

Sacrifice.

It begins to feel like a burden. A representation of what’s been lost, not what’s been found.

He contemplates taking it off, but believes that to be a betrayal of all that it stands for to the people he stands for. 

Then, one day, (surely mid-spin) he hears Rhett tell a story about wanting to change his ring.

He watches the silver twirl as Rhett explains.

He believes he was rushed into a certain type of marriage and a certain type of life by a certain type of person.

It’s a life that he’s grown to love but the ring represents a union forced by custom and not one that’s grown through devotion. 

His ring reminds him of that too often to be good for him.

Link twists his again at the admission.

So, Rhett’s thinking about replacing the ring.

Link returns home that night in a stupor. He’s sure he said one too many things to Rhett to emphasize how wild it felt to hear him talk about changing rings.

Any memories of that day, their wedding, bring up a rush of emotions that he’s never been good at sorting through.

Today’s admission makes him feel the same spur to make use of idle, betrothed hands he feels when he cleans the fridge.

He wants to clean the slate.

He finds an old DVD copy of their wedding ceremony that he paid to have converted from miniDV some years ago. Now he struggles to find a place to watch that DVD. How quickly time has flown by.

Eventually, he ends up in his son’s room - no one’s home for the remainder of the night but he and Christy - now, he’s sitting on a bean bag, squinting at the game console’s controller trying to get the joysticks to move to “play” on screen.

The ceremony bursts to life and, like it was yesterday, Link’s nerves fizzle awake.

About halfway through the video, Christy finds him like that and sits down next to him in a thwump absorbed mostly by the stuffing of the chair.

They watch themselves smile happily at each other and Christy takes his hand.

“Should I be happy or scared to find you alone watching this on a Saturday night?” she asks, wryly, squeezing his palm.

Link doesn’t know what to say. He’s caught up in Rhett’s bygone script being spoken on screen. Words about Christy and about Link that were not their own, declared loudly in front of the congregation.

“I don’t know,” Link admits, shrugging. He doesn’t. He squeezes her hand back.

“You wanna tell me what’s eating you?”

Link hesitates, but relents. He wants that clean slate, after all. “Rhett’s getting his wedding ring replaced.”

“Replaced?” Christy asks, balking.

“Replaced, yeah,” Link responds, sure he didn’t misspeak.

“With what?” she asks.

“Oh, some new one. Fancy thing, very cool, made of trees or something. Honestly he wears the other one, the slick black one more than his wedding band half the time. He says it feels like the old one? It’s the kind of ring you get in a bauble at a vending machine crank. So, he wants a new one.”

“Jeesh,” Christy says, making a face at the screen. The camera catches Rhett stealing glances at the couple, then at the crowd, beaming at all with unbridled pride.

“Wouldn’t you be mad if I did that?” Link inquires, still baffled at the idea.

“Well, no, but don’t you love your ring? Heirloom and all that,” she says.

Link cringes. “Yeah, yeah. Honestly, I do.”

“So?”

“So, I still kind of want to and I’m not sure what that means.”

They watch the screen together.

“Do you wanna stay married?” she asks, in a small voice.

“Yes,” he breathes out.

There’s a long pause.

“To me?” she asks, her voice even smaller.

“Yes,” he breathes in.

She squeezes his hand, her confidence built back up. She begs him to join her.

“And him?” Christy whispers.

They both look the screen, the lens centered on the two of them, but their gaze is mutually torn to where Rhett stands wiping a tear from his eye at Christy reciting the last of the vows that he wrote her. Wrote him. Wrote them both.

She squeezes his hand again.

“Yes,” he breathes out.

She leans her head on his shoulder.

“You should probably get another ring, then,” she jests. “We shouldn’t have to share everything.”

The slate is clean.

There’s a lot he wants to say to Rhett about it, but just as before, he’s relied on Rhett to give him the right words to say. So, instead of words, he starts wearing Rhett’s ring.

Then, a new one, when he realizes he can match him separate from the other, all told. Have something of Rhett’s, all to himself.

In his unspoken push towards something more, their hands now match along with their steps, as they walk forward.

On the last week in July, they get ice cream at the fifth place that month to mistake them for husbands, but the first one he hears Link crow an affirmative in response.

Rhett waits for him while he triple-tips the cashier (for the guess) and pays for their cones.

“Bad joke,” Rhett says, softly, but firm.

“Who’s kidding?” Link parries back, a smirk dancing it’s way across his lips.

Rhett watches him with a wistful look of disbelief.

“Link, we’re married,” Rhett warns him.

Link shrugs. “I know. I’m just waiting for you to figure that out and minding my ice cream here, all right?”

He’s got a mouthful of vanilla bean and extra cookie crumble, the next second, so his vow ends there.

Later, at home, Rhett startles Jessie awake when he fully realizes Link’s words.

He shakes her awake. He shakes them both awake.

“I’m in love with Link,” he says, like it’s a confession.

She kisses him because so is she. So are most people.

“What’s wrong?” she asks.

Rhett repeats himself.

So does she.

They stare at each other under the cover of silk and moonlight.

“We’re married,” Rhett whispers, touching his hand to hers. Their rings clink, new and shiny.

“Yeah, and so are we,” she whispers back.

They fall asleep smiling.

The next day, Rhett sneaks up behind Link while he’s working and causes him to spill his cup of coffee. He gets the stink eye for only a minute because it’s the same length of time he can stand Link’s grumpy mug before he has to swoop down and kiss him on the lips.

“You figured it out,” Link says, grinning.

“I did,” Rhett chirps as he kisses Link more.

They take a car to their house. It’s filled with their love and the history of it; before, during, and after.

“What’s this?” Link asks, dazed in their post-sex glow, naked and alive.

He spots an old chord book of theirs from last time they wrote music.

“Oh,” Rhett says, bashful. “I came looking for you here this morning, hoping you slept over again, but, uh,” Rhett stalls, looks away and tries to take the songbook from Link’s hand. Link pulls it far enough he can’t reach. “You were already at the job.”

“And?” Link asks, using his spry, sinewy body as an advantage to slink away from the bed out of Rhett’s grip. He still has the book in hand.

“Those are your vows,” Rhett explains.

Link looks down and squints, confused. These aren’t the vows that Christy read at their wedding. He’s seen that video only a few months back and is sure of it.

“Our vows,” Rhett whispers, explaining further, at Link’s puzzled look.

“It’s a love song,” Link notes, marveling at the gesture. What it means to a young version of himself that once felt like they had surely cut out and mourned the possibility of this - all of this - ever happening. To have that thought coexist with the image of a nude, hulking tree trunk of a husband laid before him smiling up adoringly felt panoptic.

“So are you.”

Link begins to cry.

“Play it for me.”

Rhett wipes his cheek.

“Get my guitar.”

They sing twice more that night, always in harmony (not always in lyric), then spend the rest of their lives together doing much the same.

[studylustre]

hey bb!! you're kinda a queen on here for giving advice so I hope you don't mind me seeking your advice.... at the moment I've been feeling really lost, I'm way behind on my peers this age in almost every aspect of life,, a reason for this is that my mental health is really bad and I lost my teen years to depression. Therefore now I can't even seem to be making friends or hold a normal conversation with adults due to my social anxiety. I used to be intelligent but I think now I'm just stupid ~~~

~~~ my dad keeps telling me how much I suck compared to everyone else, not every day but often enough that I know I'm definitely not fulfilling his expectations and I feel like I'm never going to be able to catch up on that. I've spent a lot of time on my own, I still do and I don't know how to change that, how to build my own life so I'm not dependent on my parents anymore and can move out after I've finished high school. I just would love to know your opinion on that. Please don't judge me too harshly skskshvff :')) I just would love to know how to build your own life apart from your own family, how one can be able to live with their own thoughts without getting depressed hehe,, idk I guess I carry a lot of guilt with me and I've never been able to overcome it and that's why I'm stuck not being able to move forward. Thank youu if you've read this!! I apologise that this is so unnecessary long, I'd be really grateful for some advice!! I'm a new anon btw,, :) sending u love🥺✨🌈

hi angel!! i don’t mind at all, thank u for stopping by and opening up to me about this bc it’s definitely not easy to talk to people about ur inner thoughts!! there’s quite a lot to discuss here so apologies if my response is all over the place. i first want to address what u said about feeling behind ur peers - i don’t want to dismiss ur concerns bc ur feelings are always valid and this is a v v v common feeling so ur definitely not alone in thinking this, but it’s honestly okay. this is something that took me a while to start internalising (still working on it) but there really are no rules in life!! there’s no set timeframe for you to have to achieve anything by. everyone’s path is different - we all have different dreams and goals and resources and so we all experience things at differently and at different times. life is not a competition and u don’t have to compare urself to ur peers!! also, don’t forget that even the people who u think are thriving and living their best lives have struggles of their own too. like i said, we all have our own journeys. what u see of other people’s is just a highlight reel - u never know what struggles they’re facing behind the scenes bc i can assure u, we all are going through something. none of us are just floating along life absolutely carefree!! there’s obstacles for us all and they manifest in different ways for all of us so do!! not!! compare!! urself!! to!! others!!

secondly, i’m sorry to hear that about ur dad. that’s an awful thing to hear from a parent. i know this doesn’t make up for it but i just wanted to tell u, if u haven’t heard this from anyone else, u are doing great. u may not be where u want to be right now (which is completely ok!! u have SO much time ahead of u to get to where u want to be) but u are trying, u are doing ur best and u are still here which means u are doing great. look at u, here, despite it all!! u have made it all this way and ur going to make so much more progress. i know it’s easier said than done but please try ur best to ignore the naysayers. all that matters is that u are living up to ur own standards - forget what ur dad expects of u, because ur life is ur own to live and u don’t exist to please him. also, i just wanted to reiterate ur point about ur dad having super high expectations and u feeling like u can’t keep up with them. that’s a rough realisation, but i think it’s also a v important one to acknowledge because it’s one that can set u free. if u know his expectations of u are a) unrealistic and b) too harsh, then don’t feel obligated to try and match up to them. in situations such as these, i find it’s often the case that no matter what u do, it will never be enough bc they will always find something to nitpick on. u can achieve incredible things and do everything to perfection and they will still find something to complain about and be disappointed in u for. this may or may not be the case for u, but if it is, i hope u can one day walk away from these expectations and live ur life freely the way u want without feeling like u have to measure up to any outsider’s expectations for u.

thirdly, u are not stupid!! u have so much to offer simply just by being u. i feel like u maybe think ur best days are behind u but that is far from the case. ur best days are still waiting for u!! u have so much to look forward to and so much to experience and to achieve. it’s okay to be confused and lost when trying to figure out this mess we call life. we’re all confused here bb!! none of us know exactly what we’re doing but we’re all faking it til we make it. think about it from the perspective of ur younger self - idk if this is the case for u but when i was young, i thought people who were 18 were Proper Adults. i’m now 22 and i still feel like i’m fumbling my way through life and i definitely don’t feel anything close to being an adult, but hey!! that’s okay. the important thing is that u try. even if u trip up, it doesn’t matter bc failure is inevitable in life and we all go through it. what matters is how u carry urself through these experiences and how u deal with it. it’s okay if u don’t know which direction u want to go in, or if ur not sure it’s the right path for u. just give it a go and try. u can only find out what’s good for u through actually trying. if it doesn’t work out, then whelp, at least now u know for sure that’s something that’s not for u!! onto the next experience. and the next. and the next. until u eventually find something that clicks for u. at that point, u can look back with all ur wisdom from ur experiences and know that every single trial u faced and overcame has made u a stronger, wiser and better person. we love character development!!

u mentioned that u live with a lot of guilt and u haven’t been able to move forward bc of that. would therapy be an option that u would be open to? otherwise, would u be open to trying to face some of that urself through journalling or something like that? i’m far from a qualified mental health professional so i don’t want to give u too much advice in this area bc i’m not qualified to do so, but as an anxious person and chronic overthinker, i really find that journalling helps for me to work through my thoughts. u might not be able to find all ur answers through journalling (i think that’s something that just comes through time and also potentially having a professional to walk u through it so u can untangle everything) but it does help u to get stuff off ur chest and to help u realise what’s bothering u, which is a step in the right direction. also, this may sound weird, but i hear that saying ur thoughts (the ones that cause u to spiral and feel bad/anxious) aloud to urself or to a friend helps a lot!! sometimes u don’t realise how irrational things are in ur head until u say it out loud and really hear it, or have a friend to talk u down from it.

i hope this helps!! i know this is superrrrr long and ramble-y but i hope it gave u some semblance of comfort. know that ur not alone in any of ur struggles and that there are better days waiting ahead for u!!

[invertedeidolon]

The Longest Library #7: The Little Book of Complete Bollocks by Alistair Beaton

This is a series in which I attempt to read and review all (or most of) my library of 297 books.

Rundown: I'm just going to quote part of the back here: In this witty hatchet job on the therapy culture, writer and broadcaster Alistair Beaton invites you to make friends with your anxiety, give your anger a hug, and have a good long satisfying shag with your negativity.

This is a small pocket book you'd probably gift to the drunk in your life if you share their views that therapy is too touchy feely, or if one of you have failed therapy before. I was wondering why these jokes were falling flat, and more importantly, why they were falling flat in a weird way instead of a mean-spirited way you'd expect. Then I read the back and realized that the author is british. (not sorry, british comedy is fine, bad british humor is just disappointing and feels like a small round man in his 30's trying to be clever at me in the pub)

I give this a 1/5. It'll waste a good thirty minutes, and there's like, five that made me exhale through my nose a little bit, but the rest of it was slightly exasperating.

So, this book reads like 12 year old me trying to be funny. It's a comment on therapy culture if all they've seen is TV gurus and overwritten self-discovery (not self-help) books. What I'm saying is that it could have been better. There's shitposts on tumblr that does a better job than about 89% of this book. Some of these do, in fact, read like tumblr shitposts that just barely miss the mark. There were times I felt like a lot of these were better off on a twitter account, or could be plugged into a bot that's attached to a twitter account.

However, I will share a few choice pieces with you.

IMPORTANT

Feelings of unimportance are often caused by a lack of importance. Banish your feelings of unimportance by becoming President of the United States.

Did the orange narcissist read this?

THE CHILD WITHIN

Finding the child within yourself can be harder than you think. Buy a cuddly toy and take it to bed with you. Use it to rediscover the child-self you thought you had lost forever. Keep in touch with this child-self wherever you go. Throw tantrums with people who won't let you have your way. Eat too much chocolate and be sick. Show your partner your anger by wetting the bed.

*ANGRILY PEES THE BED* YOU NEVER PUT THE FORKS BACK IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION!!!

URINE

Let urine be the mirror of your soul. Every Monday morning, use a chopstick* to whisk a little of your urine in a white porcelain bowl. If your urine turns frothy, you have a terminal illness and will be dead by the weekend. *if you have issues around chopsticks, it is better to use a fork.

Here's one that makes little if any sense and feels like it failed to set out what it wanted to do. Yes I'm complaining. Yes I'm implying I might know how to do it better. Yes I'm actually going to do it.

"Urine can be a good reflection of the state of your soul. Every Monday morning,( the day of new beginnings for each week,) you can best check your soul's status by whisking some of your urine in a white porcelain bowl with a chopstick. Almost clear urine reflects your clarity of mind and peacefulness, as you must live a balanced and peaceful life to be able to drink that much water on an almost constant basis. If you can see patterns or small particles forming in the liquid, now is the perfect time to pause and contemplate the state of your medical insurance, as you will soon be needing a doctor for that heinous infection."

There. A soft punchline that makes the laughing portion of your brain give a little squeeze without actually giving you the physical urge to giggle. Because that's what they were going for, right?

COLOUR THERAPY

Try painting your therapist a different colour.

This one works. I like this one.

YOUR BODY

Your body is a superb instrument. Why not invite it to join an orchestra?

This one doesn't. Where's the funny? What's the implication? An actual orchestra, despite the average reader not being a trained musician? A choir? An orgy?

MIRROR MEDITATION

Sit down in the lotus position, facing a full-length mirror. In complete silence, stare at your own face in the mirror, without blinking. For three or four hours, nothing will happen. Persist.After four to six hours, the eyes of the face in the mirror will start to roll its eyes and its tongue will flop out of its mouth. Do not be alarmed - this is perfectly normal. Persist. After seven to eight hours, the face in the mirror will suddenly become distorted and appear to be screaming. Do not be alarmed - this is perfectly normal. Persist. After eight to ten hours the face in the mirror will come to meet yours. It will feel as if you are bashing your head repeatedly into a glass object. You will now find yourself in an altered state of consciousness. This is known as unconsciousness.It is followed by another, higher state, known as hospital.

Are they going for a horror bent? This definitely isn't advanced enough to consciously make it about eye fatigue and hypnogogic hallucinations. I feel like the amount of hours doesn't justify the end goal. It's a meditation. Usually there's an end goal of some kind in mind. Be it a time limit or a specific state or some way to KNOW when it ends. This joke only works if someone would actually have a reason to continue the exercise even though the ending may land them in the hospital. Yes I'm nitpicking. Yes I'll admit that if the bulk of it were shorter and the ending bit came way sooner it would be funnier to my tiny pea brain with a fly's bladder sized attention span.

PAINFUL

Make space for pain in your life. If you feel just fine, seek out a counselor or therapist who will explore with you the reasons why you are denying your pain.

:)

:') This is good, it feels like a joke one of your friends would make at you.

DYSFUNCTIONAL

A dysfunctional family is not a family that fails to function; a dysfunctional family is a family that fails to function for you. Make your family function for you by asking family members to rub essential oils into your thighs. If anyone refuses, ask them why they feel threatened by your thighs.

Dril goes to therapy: the movie. This one's good.

ON THE PLANE

During long air journeys, endear yourself to crew and passengers alike by introducing those around you to the ancient power of group chant.

Theater kids, am I right?

SIMPLE PLEASURES

Get pleasure out of the little things in life. Stand on an ant.

This one is the best one. It's the absurdist and casual aggression. It's perfectly modernized and it would probably be considered the worst one back in the day.

BEYOND WORDS

Understand the importance of non-verbal messaging. Give people the sound cues which reveal your mood: If you are happy, ululate in people's ears. If you are anxious, make moaning noises. If you are depressed, fart loudly and persistently.

Ah, so mid-2000s anime fans? Got it.

So in conclusion, no need to waste time on this book. Unless wasting time is what you set out to do.

If you're truly curious, I'm selling this book. It's not on the inverted selections ebay page (where I'm putting all my stuff I don't want any more and these books will likely appear there as well) because ebay is weird and has itty bitty tiny selling limits, so I can only have 5 active listings at a time. However, if you want this before anybody else can get to it, you simply have to message me on any platform you can find me one, and we'll set something up. It's 2 US dollars for me, and about 3.50 for the postal system.

[geek-gem]

I'm gonna make a worded reblog to this. Hope the person who posted the original post doesn't mind this. Because I don't just wanna reblog this without saying anything.

I'll admit the Resident Evil movie franchise aren't the worst video game movie adaptation. Because I'll be honest and while it seems shitty I'm gonna do this but considering how Uwe is most likely any of Uwe Boll's video game movies are worse. Despite I've seen Alone In The Dark when I was a kid but was never bothered by it and didn't learn how bad it was until years later. Including seeing a I Hate Everything's review of The House Of The Dead which honestly truly looks like the worst video game adaptation ever.

Back to the point yeah I don't really hate Paul W.S. Anderson as a person or a director. Considering I like his films such as Mortal Kombat 1995, Resident Evil 2002, and AVP 2004. It's also cause he seems chill from what I've read of him and him being a, "Populist Director" and who cares more of if his movies entertain general audiences. In a weird way(which is gonna sound stupid) I feel like I'm reminded of myself when thinking of his viewpoint and just his work.

Yet it doesn't excuse him from any criticism because while I have grown to respect Paul of how he is. There are things I make criticisms about.

Sorry back to the point and yeah I'm probably being annoying with this reblog. I like the 2002 film. While I have some gripes and nitpicks. But I do feel it feels like a nice representation of the franchise. Despite it took a more sci fi route. To be honest and while this might most likely change because we're getting a reboot of the movies. It's one of my favorite movies. Including one of my favorite video game adaptations. Basically I thought he did pretty nicely with what Paul called a, "Celluloid representation".

My main issues with the movie franchise is that after the 2002 film which ended brilliantly with such a wonderful shot of Raccoon City in ruin. Yes I know there is a alternate ending but I only read comments of this YouTube showcasing it and looking through what it was. I love the ending the film gave us because it felt perfect and fitting.

Again my main issue after the 2002 film the series devlolved into a more action type series. Where the horror element especially that build up from that 2002 film that I love is gone. While I understand you shouldn't do the same thing. I missed that tone that first film had. Because honestly it was the first film, they wanted to make sure everything was all good and the best they can offer.

Including the character of Alice who I actually don't hate. But the character devolved into this from what I've seen this ultra powerful character that hardly can be beaten except at certain times. I like how in the first film there is that mystery of her trying to figure out of who she is and other stuff. I guess the thing I wanna say is she became less human at times or whatever.

Along with the fact the games characters when they finally show up are pushed into the sidelines. Such as Jill, Carlos, Claire, Chris, and whoever else. I'll admit I don't mind the interpretations of what I've seen. I'll admit I like what the films did with Carlos and how Oded Fehr and the way I looked at his character of him being a older version of the character in some regards.

I remember watching a video and had to look at the comments before this. But a video by LeonVP70 comparing the characters from the games to movies and one comment talking about how they believed Anderson identified with Carlos more in the games than Chris in the games. That Anderson basically replace Chris with Carlos. I can see that probably but it could be also cause of the script. Meh just while I don't talk about it much, I liked the character of Carlos in the games and was quite surprised by his portrayal in the movies.

I'm rambling but yeah I was fine and liked other ones such as Jill, Chris, Claire, and even Wesker. Nikolai is another story, and Nemesis while I still like the character. I just prefer the antagonistic force from the third game more than the tragic villain. Despite I never had a problem with Matt from the first film.

I think I've said too much. I'll be honest I felt bored or just didn't wanna see more RE movies after Afterlife. Which is why I haven't looked into Retribution. Despite the RT score is better. Maybe one day I'll finally watch it and make my own opinion.

Point being I agree the Resident Evil movies aren't as bad as folks make them out to be. But it's also the fact they have potential and can do better. Especially given the source material they are based upon. Which I'm glad it's being rebooted and that the film will respect the original games roots. Hopefully it being a adaptation of the first game. Along with going back to the horror route.

Sorry to ramble and sorry for the long reblog.

Is Resident Evil As Bad As Critics Say It Is?

Resident Evil has always been a big franchise. Resident Evil was originally a video game that producers and writers decided to make into a movie series. That seemed like a wise decision to me. So why did critics and movie watchers not feel the same way? The video game series is bigger than the movie series but the movie series deserved more accolades than what was given and here is why.

Keep reading

[geek-gem]

I will be honest. Even if well....I'm quite critical of the show. Including I'm bothered by certain choices they made in the show. Along with well their are sisters despite at times... they aren't my favorites. But also some things I feel they could of done better.

Whether that's how stuff goes in a big family. Or that's how they think it should be handled. Because I only have one younger brother.

Including even though at times I do want a Loud House Critical to exist. Considering of how fucking ridiculous the SU Critical is. It's probably best. Including their were at points SU Critical the more ridiculous ones made me think of wanting the show to be cancelled to spite them off.

Including reading that last part by you Nat. The whole part of sending hate to people who say positive stuff. Seriously I think my head thought grateful that the Loud House doesn't have any of the petty bullshit that goes on with the SU Criticals including the supposed downfall of it maybe or not.

Even though I feel like maybe some people might....I don't wanna sound offensive but not that harsh towards episodes or moments I have problems with.

I think it's better then people who hate Pearl because she's supposedly skinny white female(she's a alien yet their is that Asian thing okay not the point), comparing the Diamonds to Nazi's, people having a fucking problem with Steven not killing when maybe they don't know how much of a intense thing that could be even for a child. Or just....you know I understand opinions and being criticals. But God fucking damn it stuff like the Zoo and other shit. I feel like this shit needs to be taken away from these people okay see I'm getting angry.

Seriously Rebecca Sugar and the entire Crewinverse don't try to purposely offend anyone. Including I'm gonna sound stupid saying this the show isn't these fans that just wanna be critical and nitpick the fuck out of it.

This is Rebecca's show and the Crewinverse and their are at times I want them to tell some of these fans to personally shut the fuck up.

I fucking said that. Sorry Nat if I rambled on a bit much. Yet what I just said. It probably could be worse or not or could be for the Loud House. Including me being critical of characters like Lola, Luan, Lisa and some others. It would probably be worse if the sort of criticals decided to form their opinions of this show and might be worse then me when I just don't like some of their actions. Tag done

Okay will mention @wyomingparmesan sorry for the ramble and rant well almost left ramble as rant first because kept putting n by mistake whatever same topic.

“What are you thankful for today?”

Me: The fact that’s there’s no such thing as Loud House critical