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not-a-christmas-tree · 4 years ago

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i just watched the dallas theatre company les mis here are my observations

IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THIS PRODUCTION I SUGGEST YOU DO! DON’T READ THIS IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS THOUGH!

so, in case you didn’t know: in 2014, Dallas Theatre Company did a modern interpretation of les mis. i just watched it on youtube (i will link it later, i promise) and took SO MANY GODDAMN NOTES so here they are!

ACT ONE

(Look Down-WHID)

starting out strong! we got some HARSH TRUTHS ABOUT THE JAIL SYSTEM!! blatant police brutality happening BASICALLY the entire first part of the song. it hurts me.

note on the cops costumes: they legitimately terrify me and they are dressed in like. full riot gear.

okay so,,,valjean wraps the rope from his bag around his neck at the end of WHID. this is interesting bc, a) he’s trying to find a solution as to what he should do after the Bishop and that’s a direction I��ve surprisingly seen no one take, but b) this part has the same melody as javert’s suicide, when javert is ALSO trying to figure out what he should do after his perception on life is altered. for a moment there, they both are on the same page, the page being suicide. however, only one of them takes that choice.

the above makes the lines (in both songs) “i’ll escape now from that world / from the world of valjean” ESPECIALLY interesting because. in two different ways, they did escape, but they ALMOST had the same conclusion for a brief second.

(At The End Of The Day)

in ATEOTD fantine ends up being the last one working, causing everyone to look at her with varying degrees of annoyance or frustration. She do be hardworking doe

OH SHIT KIDS IN THE FACTORY!! three little kids run up to the foreman when he’s giving daily stipends to the ladies!! (they’re also the last to be paid, giving significant sass to foreman who also sasses back)

Girl #5 mockingly calling fantine “innocent sister” when 5 is white and fantine is a WOC...that’s kind of interesting given that that can be read as SERIOUS racial profiling on 5’s part

foreman looks like bob’s boss in the incredibles but like. tall lmao

(I Dreamed A Dream)

her look of like,,shock-but-not when everyone from the factory exits and she takes off her bandana,,,that. that is good acting

her transitions from chest to head voice are so good

i’m kinda sad she isn’t younger?? or just. doesn’t look super young bc fantine is supposed to be like. early twenties. she’s not 45 and had a decently long life before she died, no, she’s young. she was taken advantage of. that’s the whole point. but that’s sUPER little like this lady is way too good

she has the perfect mix of sadness and regret plus anger and shameless hope. like. kudos to you allison blackwell you’re a dope fantine

the cry on “killed the dream i dreamed” brb sobbing

(The Dock Scenes)

MALE PROSTITUTES I REPEAT!! MALE PROSTITUTES!! (no idea what wig he’s wearing tho. he was done dirty in the wig department)

oh male prostitute is prostitute #1!

oh damn there is. lady def on some bad drugs with her kid passing behind fantine on the bench. ouch.

hoo okay they did n o t censor lovely ladies!! (mini note: camera person has the camera down an AWFUL LOT on these docks scenes lmao)

there are cops on the docks. gross.

(Who Am I-Confrontation)

OH SHIT THEY HAVE A FALSE JVJ IN THE BACKGROUND OF WHO AM I

jvj comforts not-jvj for a second!! (money note was FANTASTIC btw)

fantine being WOC and DYING in a modern hospital also is,,yeesh because. you know. racist doctors.

jvj cries after fantine dies JUST STAB ME NOW OKAY—

confrontation is really funny when u see that javert has a GUN and jvj has A CHAIR

JVJ DID THE LIL RUN ON “live within my care” YAAAAY

(COAC-Master Of The House)

oh boy baby cosette,,so small,,so pure plus classic baby head shake when she sings I STAN

MADAME T LOOKS—OH GOOD GOD

DID SHE SPIT ON MY BABY--

cosette: “please do not send me out alone—“ madame t: “oooooh my gOOOOOD” omg

what the fuck is thenardiers hair i—

WHAT THE FUCK IS THENARDIER IN G E N E R A L

random idea regarding thenardier’s prison tattoo: he has the same number on his chest that jvj has. Meaning he was in jail too. so why isn’t he as messed up as jvj? i wanna say maybe he was in for less time, but like. I doubt it. However, he has a whole ass gang. did the thenardier gang break their boss out of jail? please say yes

him listing things for baby éponine to charge i love it

OH MY GOD THENARDIER FLAUNTS HIS NUMBER WHILE JVJ DOESNT!! jvj hides his past because he believes it will get him into better places (it does, he becomes mayor for god’s sake) while thenardier shows off his past with stubborn pride. while thenardier cheats his way to success, jvj lives an almost honest life where he ultimately suffers due to the stress all the hiding he does gives him

i love that éponine looks like neither of her parents,,,madame t got around huh?

(The Bargain)

I JUST REALIZED THE STAGE HAS A CATWALK DOWN THE CENTER INTO THE AUDIENCE THAT IS THE COOLEST OMG

Instead of madame correcting thenardier on cosette’s name he asks cosette herself which prompts the CUTEST ANGRY YELL OF “it’s cosette!” I HAVE EVER SEEN

also thenardier fuckin MANHANDLING cosette i’m DYING

JVJ LOVES HER SM I AM SOFTTT

(The Beggars)

omg marius is so ADORABLE i love him

gavroche is a style icon

kid holding sign saying “my mom got laid off” POOR BB

i love éponine

that’s it that’s the note

wait a sec was that montparnasse with the prostitute earlier in beggars??

ALSO I SEE AZELMA AND OTHER THENARDIER KIDS PRESENT FOR “turn on the tears!!” THANK YOU FOR UTILIZING THAT LINE PROPERLY

why does enj have a bat?? If it;s not a bat then,,,what is it? someone please help me

marius saves cosette from bad guy gang!! 🥰🥰

bruh javert misses jvj running by like,,,MAYBE two seconds that is hilarious

jav looks so done when thenardier is trying to get out of this lmao i love it

javert looks so cop-like it scares me

(Stars)

the line “safe behind bars” in stars kind of kills me here because as the audience you SEE the cruelty that the convicts face. you see the guy on the ground getting beaten you SEE the chains around their throats and yet. yet javert still somehow thinks that putting jvj in jail is safe? i think the thing to focus on here is not whether it’s safe, because it obviously isn’t. the focus is who it’s safer for, jean valjean or javert?

has it always been “your father” rather than “her father” when marius asks éponine to find where cosette lives?? if they changed it that is SMART because yk. jvj would be ALARMED if he found out he’d been found by éponine but he wouldn’t hurt her. he’s not the guy she has to worry about, it’s her own father. thenardier gave her a job and she’s straying from it, he’s what would endanger her.

THE PLAYFUL BOOP AND SHOVE FROM MARIUS 🥺🥺🥺

(The ABC Café)

“note-ruh daym”

hee hee pretty enjolras

pretty enjolras in skinny jeans even better

OOH we have,,,angry enjolras in this version o k a y

grantaire raises his hand before agog/aghast part omg

“i’ve never heard him ooOOOOh and aAAAAh *excited squeal*

“dan joo-wan” i love texas

bossuet spotted :)

longing gay looks NOT spotted :(

i love enjolras okay but this one is just,,,a little too aggressive. enjolras isn’t just angry all the time, he’s not that one dimensional. of course, there is more of the show to see and i hope he changes a little bit, but so far red and black isn’t doing much for me. enjolras is hopeful, not just angry.

A CAPELLA SECTION IN RED AND BLACK?? I think YES

the amis finding out lamarque is dead has “fuck trump just won the election” energy

okay i was hoping that enj would change his aggression thing when they find out lamarque is dead (bc that’s when most enjolrai figure out what may happen and kinda sober up yk) but. it doesn’t look like he did. there is hope for barricade scenes

OMG LIL NOTE ON COMBEFERRE GIVING OUT FLYERS TO AUDIENCE MEMBERS: that is fucking pERFECT and yk why?? because it’s a call to action!! it’s less obvious in DYHTPS because they’re mostly singing to each other but later in epilogue when the words and melody is repeated, it’s meant as a call to action! “will you join in our crusade, who will be strong and stand with me?” is a cALL TO ACTION AND THEY ARE HANDING FLYERS TO AUDIENCE MEMBERS—that’s officially the only way to break the fourth wall THANK YOU

hey fantine doubles as a student i think!!

HARMONIES ARE C L E A N OOOOH

(In My Life-Heart Full Of Love)

okay yes i already love cosette because she plays awkward-teen-in-love-for-the-first-time PERFECTLY.

book-ish cosette hell yes a cutie

father-daughter forehead kisses 🥺

awkward mARIUS TIMEEEEE

placing marius, éponine, and cosette in a triangle is a MARVELOUS decision thank u for that symbolism

marius checking if he looks good and ép giving him a thumbs up omg

*aggressively tries to sit normally* same cosette

*awkward curtsy* also same cosette

(Attack On Rue Plumet)

robbery time let’s see how they do this

ooh marius and cosette run off but i can’t tell if they notice gang before running

thenardier fuckin SLICES éponine after her scream

NOOOO HER LIL WHIMPER AFTER BEING THREATENED AGAIN

(One Day More)

this lil part between robbery and one day more is interesting bc i legit have NO idea what jvj is thinking here. he keeps looking between his watch (i think it’s a watch idk) and cosette after she runs off to pack so like. what. is he doing here bc he looks like he’s choosing between two things but i don’t,,know,,what things

red berets on the amis are dope btw

i think marius is discussing what to do with éponine here, which is FUN because we all know why she goes to the barricade in the brick :’) éponine might be convincing marius to go to the barricade knowing this is her chance to die with him like in the book

omg

OMG

that stomp bit with the students was the coolest fucking thing i’ve ever seen

END OF ACT ONE

act two will be posted shortly :D

#enjoy my super long analysis on WHID and Stars lmao #i went ham with the english brain #les mis #les miserables #dallas theater company #modern les mis #les amis de l'abc #les amis

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jinmukangwrites · 5 years ago

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From the Ashes (2/???)

Summary: In a modern version of Hyrule, a young man finds himself in a world filled with nothing but white walls, studying faces, and tests after tests. Something is different about him, and the world seems very interested is seeing what makes him tick. (A modern, BOTW/LOZ “Labrat” AU)

Chapter 1, Chapter 3 (to be released for all Partron's today, July 11th for Tumblr)

Warnings: Death, torture, blood, description on injury, experimentation, dark themes, emotional abuse, abuse.

Make sure you read the warnings, be safe.

-o-o-o-o-

Today there's autopsy, he died during it, but there's still an autopsy. They give him the numbing agent like always before they secure him down, but there's nothing that can stop the pain of a scalpel cutting down your chest, nothing like the skin being torn apart in different directions, nothing like ribs being pried apart so they can get a better look at your still beating heart.

They're careful at first, making sure he lives long enough for them to get their samples of tissues and muscles and fluid until they do what they always do instead of stitching him back together; they kill him. It's effective. Whatever brings him back to life whenever he dies heals everything and leaves nothing but a scar on his skin. He wakes up moments later completely healed and ready for whatever they want to do to him next.

It seems today they also want to test his endurance, because right as he wakes up from his autopsy, the mask that always kills him is strapped on and soon death takes him again.

The black lasts longer this time, the warmth comes a little later and just a bit duller, but he wakes up again, fine, breathing, good. Then the mask kills him again, it takes longer, again, it's colder. He wakes up. He dies. Again.

Longer. Colder. Alive. Dead. Again. Again.

Six times he dies until the machines scream at them to stop when he can't. He's dizzy, the phantom pains of knives literally in his chest burn and his lungs are begging for fresh air. He can't feel his body as they undo the straps and place him in a wheelchair for transport. Soon, he's wheeled into his home, the only place he can call his, and left there to blankly stare at the white walls until he can find the strength to move.

It takes a few hours, but he finally manages to wobbly stand up from the wheelchair. It's a practice he's mastered, this is nothing new. He doesn't bother to look back at the observation room connected to his with a panel of glass. He knows that the main scientist is there, observing him while he nibbles on the end of his pen. He's the same man who killed him for the first time in his one and only true memory. He hasn't seen that nice woman since, he wonders where she is.

Anyway, he ignores the observation room. They usually go away and turn on the cameras once he's collapsed in his small, threadbare bed. There's not much to observe when all he has energy to do is clutch at his thin pillow and breathe until sleep takes him. Why waste time watching him sleep when they could be preparing for the next experiment, the next sample, the next death.

The moment he collapses into his bed, on top of his blanket and pillow not even properly placed under his head, the bright lights in his cell turn off and multiple blinking green dots appear in the dark corners of his cell near the ceiling. His eyes unwillingly slip closed, he wishes he could keep them open, yet he knows fighting sleep is useless.

At least, when he's asleep, he has a name and family. When he's awake, he's got terror. When he's dead, he's got nothing.

Though, nothing is starting to sound very nice, and if only it would last forever.

-o-o-o-o-

There are sometimes days where they do nothing to him. He cherishes those days. He has time to do whatever he wants (within limited restrictions and boundaries of course) just as long as he does their mandatory workouts and therapy sessions.

The workouts are easy. He's brought to a large gym where there are treadmills and tracks and weights; there's an instructor and two guards and he does what he's told for about an hour to two depending on what the instructor determines what his body needs. The foods they feed him are filled with vitamins and minerals, so it's not like he's bone skinny, but he's not muscular either. Despite the things they do to him, they want his body to be healthy, that way results are not tainted by starvation, exhaustion, and a poor immune system.

He likes climbing. Out of everything they have him do during workouts, it's climbing nets and walls that he loves most. Running is fine, stretching and yoga is sort of okay, lifting weights is boring and he doesn't like that, they had him try swimming a couple times but both times he almost drowned so they got rid of that, but climbing is something he would willingly do.

There's something freeing about lifting himself higher and higher with nothing but his own strength. He likes to pretend he's climbing a mountain, a very tall mountain. One where if he ever reaches the top, he will be free from labs and experiments, he will be able to swing his arms out and lift his face to the stars and never have to go back.

The worst part about climbing is having to come back down.

Today he ran, he didn't get to climb, but there's always a next time.

Therapy sessions are a bit harder because it's a full two hours where he's expected to communicate, and he doesn't very much like the therapist. He can't speak, no matter how hard he tries to make sounds or how long they grill him in basic vocal practices it just doesn't happen. He somehow knows a bit of sign, but just the simple ones, limited to mostly letters. Most of the therapy sessions involve him trying to spell out how he's feeling with his hands and the therapist getting impatient with how long it takes for him to sign S-C-A-R-E-D or H-A-P-P-Y or H-U-R-T when he theoretically could just say the words and move on. He gets yelled at a lot, which he doesn't think getting yelled at is a part of therapy but he has to remind himself that he doesn't know what therapy is outside of the labs, so for all he knows getting yelled at for things he can't control is what therapy is all about.

Thankfully, today the therapist looks happy. When they're happy, they talk a lot about themselves instead of him. Apparently their brother got married and they got to go back home to the Zora's Domain to visit. He only knows a couple Zora, the therapist being one of them, the others being various scientists and nurses. There's a Goron on the security team, but the rest are all Hylian. He hears stories of the Gerudo sometimes, but he's never seen one. They sound beautiful, especially since none of them come here to the labs to hurt him.

After a whole long story about how the therapist got to go cliff driving with their siblings (oh cliff driving sounds wondrous even though he can't swim well) the therapist sighs and clicks a pen against the clipboard in their hands.

"Okay," they grumble, "let's get this over with. How are you feeling today?"

It's a question that should be genuine, but the therapist says it like they'd rather be sleeping.

Today, he doesn't hurt, today's a free day. He got to work out, but he didn't get to climb. He came to therapy and hasn't been yelled at yet. He's okay. A little tired from working out, a little hungry, but he's okay.

O-K. T-I-R-E-D. W-O-R-K-O-U-T

"Yesterday Doctor Marras tested your endurance, how did that go?"

He lifts his hand up to his chest, his fist shaped in the sign for "A". He moves his fist down like a scalpel would. His sign for "Autopsy".

D-I-E.

He makes the shape for "D" now and puts it over his nose, the sign for the mask used to kill him.

Six. No / R-I-S-K / seven.

"How did you feel?"

He brings his hands out in front and touches the fingertips of his pointer fingers a couple times. Hurt. He then opens his palms across his chest and drags them outward while slowly closing his fists. Afraid.

The therapist sighs and he puts his hands down to his lap. This conversation sounds old, feels repetitive.

It doesn't matter. He knows it's just a way to make sure he's still capable of thinking and living. Losing his mind would be almost as bad as letting his body wither away. Almost. They'd rather his body is peak physical condition than his brain fully functional, which is probably why his work out trainor is actually very good while his therapist doesn't help that much at all.

Whatever the case, he's asked a couple more required questions and he's not yelled at at all before he's escorted back to his cell where a small number of activities await him. By his cot is a small pile of books, a sketch pad, and some pencils. On the small plastic table next to the bed is a black tablet with apps for learning basic math and science are downloaded on, along with an app used to help him learn more words in sign. There's a paper cup of water placed next to it, right beside a protein bar which is certainly a rare sight. He's usually fed the same gray, tasteless goop every breakfast, lunch, and dinner. If he's given actual substance, he must have done something good. Or they're all just in a good mood.

Not one to pass up the opportunity of actual food, he grabs the bar and gently tears it out of it's wrapping. He sighs in content as the flavor hits his tongue, it's bitter, but he can still taste chocolate. Content, he plops down on his cot and opens the sketch book. He flips through the pages he's already sketched on and lands on a blank page. Tapping the pencil against the paper in thought, he glances up quickly at the observation room. Today the glass has been changed into a mirror, which sends a wave of uneasiness through him. Whatever is going on behind that mirror, they don't want him to see today.

He sucks in a breath and turns back down to his sketchbook.

#jin writes #fan fiction #legend of zelda #botw #loz botw #breath of the wild #link #au

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writerofscribbles · 5 years ago

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♦ twk pov characters [ 4/4 ] lucien

And as the song rose, lifting out of his mouth and into the air, the sharp smell of metallic blood mixed with it, giving it a life, a breath, a beat. It seemed to swirl, a tether to his very soul. His piece of himself to give back as he took what was not his. His hands moved without thinking, carving, the blood dripping down into the pool and staining it dark. But the victim never moved, never flinched, just bobbed in the water with lashes fluttering.

L U C I E N - - D A R K N I G H T

blood magic apprentice / the conman / slytherin

t r a i t s - - patient, hardworking, ambitious, enigmatic, compartmentalizing efficanato, private, finds it hard to trust, devoted, determined, driven

d e s c r i p t i o n - - twenty-two at the beginning of the series. He is not very tall, only reaching 5’8” on a good day. His hair is wavy and brushed back away from his face to fall to the back of his neck, a deep dark color that is nearly black and usually described ebon. His eyes are his father’s light blue, framed by dark lashes and frowning brows. He is pale skinned, especially during his time in the Darknight House. He is slim, but he fills out the longer he spends in the Darknight House, having been skinny from poverty. Lucien is considered quite pretty.

s n i p p e t - -

He didn’t want the fighting to end. He wanted to win, or at least, lose fairly.

She didn’t either as she popped her knuckle into her mouth, spinning away from a sloppy lunge. Repositioning herself with her back to Illian she wrapped her hand around her staff and lurched forward. It was getting messy now, the well placed moves from before gone and now it was rapid halfhearted blows.

Lucien took a deep breath and lunged at her, full force, slamming the staff horizontally into hers. He wasn’t much bigger than her and they were evenly matched in fatigue. Lucien growled at her and she bared her teeth back before they shoved apart again.

“Let’s end this,” she muttered, whipping the staff above her head and bending into a low lunge to sweep his feet. Lucien jumped out of the way, barely missing being clipped by the wood.

His mind snapped, a decision made in an instance. “Let’s.”

Lucien stepped forward and smashed the staff into the side of her head. Her head whipped to the side and she dropped to the side, blood leaking from the her mouth. She wasn’t dead, he couldn’t have hit her that hard, but she was down. She groaned as she pushed to her elbow, trying to rise. Lucien kicked the staff out of her hands, it rolling out of the ring and against the sliver of obsidian next to the walls.

A slow clapping came from the door as Illian Darknight moved into the light, dim shadows cast over his face, making him look like a dripping shadow. Lucien bowed, part of him itching to help Casilda up.

“Rise,” Illian said, voice dark and smoky. Lucien looked up, and now that Illian was in the light, Lucien studied the dark planes of his face, dark eyes, scruffy beard, inky dark hair. It was as if Illian absorbed all of the light around him, drinking it in. He held out a gloved hand to Cas, who turned her head to look at it. Blood smeared her mouth and a bruise was already blossoming on her cheekbone. She struggled to her knees. “Take it, apprentice,” Illian said. “I will not offer again.” With a small, nervous smile, Cas gripped his hand and he helped haul her to her feet. Lucien stepped forward and offered his arm and she slumped against him.

“May I take Apprentice Casilda to the infirmary, Master Darknight?” Lucien asked, hoping he had not injured Cas too badly. She had never wronged him and he hoped she wouldn’t be too pissed now. She was wobbly, but seemed okay.

Illian snapped his fingers and a small figure appeared at the edge of the door in all white. Lucien and the others only knew them as the Silent. Some apprentices suspected that Illian carved out their tongues, leaving them only with pinched white faces and hollow expressions.

“Take Apprentice Casilda to Healer Dario to see her wounds tended to.” The Silent boy moved forward, holding out his slender arms for Casilda to fall into. Instead she pushed herself upright.

“I’ll walk, thanks,” she muttered. She bowed stiffly to Illian and nodded to Lucien. “Good fight, apprentice. Thank you, Master Darknight,” She grimaced, hand clenched over her side while her split lip leaked more blood. The Silent boy held out a white cloth to her, trying to blot the blood away but she smacked his arm away and stumbled towards the door.

Illian shook his head slowly, arms crossed behind his back. Lucien dropped to his knee in respect, head propped against his forearm as Illian turned back him. “Apprentice, I said, rise.”

tag list - - @dramaticvoiceover @livvywrites @millionsoftea @poetic-leigh-me @wipshelves @trishsannethology

♦ let me know if you wish to be added or removed! ♦

#the wrath king #intro ;; lucien darknight #twk characters #kt writes #character introduction

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camelliacats · 5 years ago

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Baubles, Bitches, & Blood

An award-winning freeverse poem, best viewed on FFN or AO3. ;)

-----

Fic: "Baubles, Bitches, & Blood" [FFN] [AO3]

Pairings/Characters: Victoire Weasley/NevilleLongbottom (tho rather Vic-centric), the Delacour–Weasley family, the extended Potter–Weasley brood, & cameos from Scorpius Malfoy & the Scamander twins

Rating: light T

Words: ~680

Additional info: romance, cross gen, angst, poetry, freeverse, Next Gen era, 1st person POV

Summary: Yes, my name is Victoire. Yes, I'm fairly proud of myself. So why must you all tear me down or write me off?

-----

"Come inside from the cold, Victoire"

I'm standing out here, in nothing but my crepe-thin sweater, in the

b-l-i-s-t-e-r-i-n-g cold

to prove a

point

Father, dear Father—

you won't ever get it

A girl's heart and soul

are much more than /s/i/l/l/y/ things

that will be broken&&repaired

over 'n over 'n over

again

"Come eenside from ze cold, Victoire"

Mother, dear Mother—

you should know best how I feel…

Shouldn't you?

Because—last I checked—I wasn't the only part-Veela who everyone thought was

S*H*A*L*L*O*W

So, please, give me a

break

I can't be what you once dreamed

YOU

could've

been

"Come in to the house, Vic"

Sister, dear Sister

Fuck. You.

You eyed Teddy all along

(and, no, I could care less that you took him&used him&now he's all Lily's)

—but—

what gets me the most

is that you'll never change

some

Hufflepuff

you are

What, you thought I got into Ravenclaw because I screwed the Sorting Hat?

Nope

This girl knows her *shit*

&&…

she knows where all the skeletons are

B-u-R-i-E-d

so I dare you to go behind my back again,

to think you got the upper hand over me again,

to think you can sweet-talk me into

Taking

The

Fall

again.

Because you can't just cuddle your way back into my good graces.

Try Hexing me instead.

"Come inside from the cold, Vic"

Brother, dear Brother

You are nearly as innocent as you

ACT

(and, really, I was once proud of the façades I taught you to build up)

But, now…

Everything's different

I smile, you see,

to cover up the shards of

broken p_e_r_s_o_n_a_l_i_t_y

with which you all have left me

Can you do that, too?

Has the apprentice

s u r p a s s e d

the master?

Louis, when you reach that point,

then

come back to me.

Only then could you

POSSIBLY

begin to understand the enigma that is your

*oldest* sister

"Victoire!"

Ah…

Aunties & Uncles

Bugger off

I have nothing to say to you

You're like Mum&Dad

prettylittleVictoire

is not some

damn DOLLY

for you all to "coddle" and "adore"

Must I remind you that

Am.

HUMAN?

"Vic…"

Cousins, scores of cousins

I have the least to say to you

I think I'll make myself

s-c-a-r-c-e

when you

Each

need me

M_o_s_t

"Victoire."

Chorused as usual, boys

Ickle ones, Malfoy, Scamander, & Scamander

Go comfort Rose, Scor

Go find Roxanne, Lorcan

Go buy half a brain, L_y_s_a_n_d_e_r

Some friend you are

Full of myself, you so honestly pointed out?

I need to say something when I'm upset?

WHY

isn't it e_n_o_u_g_h

for my "mates" just to…

read what's on my face?

Ignore the tears on my cheeks now

They're just silly little things that will dry up soon enough (according to Dad)

After all, I'm the strong one

*the g_l_u_e*

I'll keep all of our friends, our little group

t_o_g_e_t_h_e_r

Glue never fails, does it?

"Luv"

Bollocks.

Get away from me, Neville.

I won't romantically

into your "big, strong" a_r_m_s

as you might so desire

so that this will all

goaway

I'm allowed to C_R_Y, damn it

I'm allowed to feel V_U_L_N_E_R_A_B_L_E

I'm allowed to think that this is D_E_S_P_A_I_R I feel, at the cost of others

I'm allowed to

Just—

BE—

I'm allowed to hurt,

so if you can't see it, then you go back inside, and warm up

—but—

…

If…by some chance…you DO see me…really hear me…

then come closer

Envelope me in your big, strong arms (ha, no, really, they aren't that skinny)

Look at me with your dark, boring-holes-into-me eyes (and brush that lock of hair away, you know I've always loved your eyes)

K~i~s~s me with your pillow-like lips

&maybe, just maybe

I'll stop drawing everyone's b-l-o-o-d

Because there's more to me than

baubles & bitchiness

I have a p_r_o_u_d heart, too,

that I use to lead a p_r_o_u_d life

so…please

Stand up to all the others for me, with me

&& make me a proud

W I F E

-----

Well. I think Victoire has said a mouthful. Understandable, though. I was in a bit of a mood and I scratched this out…on my phone's notepad. When I finally wrote it in my freeverse notebook, this turned out to be seven pages long. Well, we all know that doesn't really equate to seven pages typed, but…it just goes to show that from dark comes light. From the negative emotions has come something I consider to be amongst my best work. So, some of my best work is dedicated to some of the best buddies ever: Mango—one of the best friends a mew could ever ask for; Mor—Vicnev wouldn't be here without that Lilted (and thanks for beta'ing!); Aimy—Vicnev enjoys your constant support; Kimmy—here's something AWESOME to read after such a long break from FFN; Claire—the M&MWP forum wouldn't be complete without your drop-bys; & Jo & Kylie & Beth, who always keep me delighted and entertained.

Final say: Interpret the last few lines as you wish. Is Victoire actually hitched to Neville here? Or is she just implying that he ought to stand by (& up for) her if they're ever going to reach that point? Hmm… Who knows…? ;3

Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave an anon/unsigned review via the FFN link or comment via the AO3 link at the top of the post, especially if you enjoyed this!

~mew

2017 note: It's funny. Sometimes, rereading old works will make me cringe. Other times, ones like this 5yo piece will make me smile and agree with my A/N from 2012—I'm still very proud of this piece, because it paints enough of a picture of Victoire and where she stands in her family. I love the pacing and formatting, too, and I love how her resistance starts to soften/crumble towards the end once Neville speaks to her, because it's not that she's weak to love but feels as if she finally has someone she truly can trust. Even amongst such a large family as hers…I don't doubt it can be hard to find that person. :')

#hp #harry potter #vicnev #victoire weasley #<1000 #romance #cross gen #angst #poetry #free verse #next gen era #rated: PG13 #1st POV

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so-dovey · 6 years ago

Text

First Date | Dovie

L o c a t i o n : D A L L A S, TX 16.01.2019

B a c k g r o u n d I n f o : Jamie takes Dove on their first date.

F e a t u r i n g : @j14benn

T R I G G E R W A R N I N G : Mention of death

Dove: Dove sat in her hotel room with only a towel around her body as she re-evaluated what she was going to wear for the date. Nerves has slowest started getting her very excited but also quite nervous about how the date with the y’all hockey player would play out. After their New Years kiss and their texting back and forth she expected a nice evening but she couldn’t help but wonder how he’d be in person. After settling onto a nice pair of skinny jeans and a camisole type top with a light cardigan over top she sat and waited for Jamie to text her that he was there to pick her up. She had some ankle booties on her feet, ready to head downstairs to the lobby of the hotel.

Jamie: Jamie thought about suiting up for the date, but he knew that it could be too dressed up, and probably bring attention to himself. So instead he settled on a pair of dark jeans, a plain black shirt, covering up his tattooed arms with a black jacket, joking with himself in the mirror about looking a bit too goth. his hair was slicked back and out of his face. As he headed towards the door, he slid on his shoes, yet again the color of his outfit, black. putting his keys and wallet into the pockets of his pants, he grabbed his phone off the charger and quickly texted Dove that he would be on his way shortly.

Dove: Dove was so lost in thought for a moment that the incoming text almost made her jump. She picked up her phone and glanced at who texted her. When she saw Jamie's name a smile curled onto her lips. She grabbed her small cross body bag and her hotel key and decided to make her way down to the lobby to wait for Jamie there. She was excited to see what he had planned for their date. She knew they were getting sushi, or that's what it sounded like anyway and she was more than excited to get to have a face to face conversation with him.

Jamie: The drive to her hotel was a bit of a traffic-jammed one, an accident on the tollway backed traffic up a bit, causing Jamie to swear under his breath, he wanted to say this was his fault for living a bit in the suburbs, away from the city. Finally, into the heart of Dallas, he pulled up to the hotel Dove was staying at, the W, which was right across the street from his team’s home, the AAC. Pulling up under the canopy behind the large steel W, Jamie climbed out of the card, with a gasp from the Valet, obviously not expecting the Captain of the Dallas Stars to pull up today. Waving he said “I’m just here to pick someone up, I won’t be long” leaving his car parked there. Walking into the lobby, he scanned the place looking for Dove. Once the blonde caught his eye, he smiled and headed towards her, “You hungry?” He asked as he tapped her lightly on the shoulder to get her attention.

Dove: Dove was absent-mindedly standing around the lobby waiting to hear from Jamie when she felt a tap on her shoulder, quickly she turned around expecting a fan only to find Jamie. A smile spread on her features as she embraced the tall man in a hug. "Starving." she chuckled a little. Her voice was back thank goodness cause she would've hated to not been able to talk during their date. A first date for her was all about figuring out all she could about the other person, really getting to know them and be present and she couldn't wait to learn more about Jamie.

Jamie: With a smile Jamie leads her out of the lobby and outside, walking over to his car, he opened the passenger side door for Dove, and then closing it behind her after she had climbed in. Quickly darting around to the other side and climbing into the car. Pressing the button to start the car, Jamie switched the car into drive and started for their next destination, it wasn’t too far away, just a short drive of five minutes before Jamie was pulling into the parking garage behind the restaurant. This was the first first date that the 29-year-old had had in years, so small talk was pretty short with him, he didn’t know what to fully say. Once parked, he once again pulled out his chivalry, as after he got out of the car, he quickly ran to open the door to help the blonde out.

Dove: Dove sat in the car quietly, stealing short glances at her handsome date. Her last first date was a little over 2 years ago so she was a little nervous. It didn’t take long for them to pull into a parking lot. Jamie was coming to open her door as soon as he was out of the car. “Thank you.” She told him with a smile before heading inside with him. “You're looking so handsome by the way"

Jamie: “Oh you think so?” he said in his shy lumbering voice, “You look way better than I do, you look beautiful” a small smile peeking from his lips as they approached the host, “Yes, reservation for 2, name ‘Benn’.” without hesitation, the waitress grabbed two lunch menus and proceeded to lead the two to a table made for two, the light from day coming in through the window, illuminating the table for them, beside the lamp overhead. With a mention of the waitress would be with them shortly, Jamie nodded his head, and said: “Thank you so much”. Glancing down at the menu, Jamie pondered what he’d orders first, “So, should we share an appetizer?”

Dove: It was a quite fancy restaurant that the male had chosen. Not fancy enough to make her feel uncomfortable though. Once at their seats the blonde focused fully on the card for a second. “Yeah that would be a good option, what should we get though?”she debated as she looked at the options. “Oh the crab cakes sound nice. Or what do you think?” She questioned the male.

Jamie: Glancing down at the list of appetizers, Jamie made a disgusted face, “what kind of restaurant serves deviled eggs?” He was never a big fan of the food, but seeing it on the menu threw him off, but continued to look, “I’d happily share some crab cakes with you, and kind of excited for the sushi rolls, I’ve heard they’re super good.” When the waitress came back to the table, she quickly took their drink orders as well as the appetizers, bring Jamie to look back at the sushi rolls.

Dove: Dove chuckled at the deviled egg comment. "Someone doesn't like deviled eggs, huh?" She giggled softly before she gave the waitress her order. Her eyes went back to the sushi rolls to find what she wanted to order. There were way too many good options to choose from but the blonde ended up settling on the Tuna Roll before closing her menu and focusing on the male across from her. The person she flew halfway across the country for and couldn't wait to get to know better. "Struggling on making a choice?" she questioned with a playful smile on her lips.

Jamie: “They smell bad, the texture is horrible” was his rebuttal to Deviled eggs, finishing it off with an ‘ew’ sound following it. Scanning over the food available on the list, he shrugged at her question, “A bit, there are too many delicious things on here that sound too good to be true. I think I’ll do a Prime Roll with a Ahi Tuna salad, it may be too much, but I could always take home what I don’t eat and save it for later.” He closed the menu and set it down on the table in front of him to match her, hopefully signaling to the waitress that they were ready.

Dove: It didn't take long for the waitress to come and take their food order, taking their menus away. "So is this a place you come to a lot?" she questioned as she glanced around. It was a gorgeous restaurant and if the sushi was as good as the whole place looked then it may be the best sushi place in Dallas. "Or do you cook at home more than you go out? Being healthy and athletic and all.." she chuckled a little. She couldn't even imagine being an athlete, dedicating their life to being completely in shape and healthy. She did her best as far as water input and working out goes but sometimes she definitely was lacking the motivation on some days.

Jamie: When she asked if he frequented the place, he was quick to shake his head, “No, I’ve never actually been here before, A teammate recommended it to me, and he usually has really good recommendations, so I can only hope his review on this place is true.” he could feel his anxiety kicking in, his laugh was getting a bit more nervous than usual, “It’s about finding the healthy protiens to follow workout and finding things to help with your muscles after work out, you feed your body and you feed your muscles. Now, I’m not /much/ of a cook, I mean I can cook something, but I will never consider myself a chef... I make a mean steak though.” He smiled at the blonde, “Why, do you need a healthy buddy?”

Dove: Doves eyesbrow cocked up at him saying he’s never been. She was now also hoping that his friend was giving them a good recommendation because she would hate to get sick from bad sushi. “I mean I wouldn’t mind. I am not a working out person. I did during the summer while filming to be in shape for the dancing but gosh I struggle so hard with being consistent about it.” The blonde sighed but then shrugged. “I mean I’m good and I eat fairly healthy. I tend to meditate and journal. More for my mental health, that’s really important to me.” She pointed out with a small smile.

Jamie: He sort of shrugged it off, “As much as I was good at sports, I didn’t work out as often as I should’ve... and where I acquired the nickname chubbs, lately I’ve been getting better,” He quickly realized he sounded like he was preaching about working out, “I’m not saying you should, cause you look amazing with your eating healthy and what not”, he mentally slapped himself, hoping he didn’t offend her, he was known to not really think before he talked sometimes, his teammate Tyler was worse. “I personally haven’t taken enough time mentally for myself, and with everything going on lately, media and such, I almost wish I could have a mental health vacation,” knowing full and well he had a week off soon for the all-star break, maybe time with her would help him.

Dove: "Chubbs? Aww but you're not chubby." she pointed out like it was the most obvious thing in the world, although she did think the nickname was kind of endearing. She chuckled softly when he made sure to compliment her between all the workout talk. "Thank you, running around for work is probably what got me so busy, it's a workout in itself really. Running from meeting to meeting" she shrugged, she loved being busy and she loved her job but sometimes a day off like today was really nice. "Mental health is so important. You should try something like journaling daily. Or whatever you're comfortable with. I mean.. all up to you but if you wanna work on that, you're the only one stopping yourself.." she knew that that first step was weird and awkward and can be really hard but it was worth it in the end and she now really loved her journalling and making sure she was mentally okay. "You have a week off soon, right? When you agreed to come explore Disneyland? That can be a good time to start with all the extra free time?"

Jamie: “I’m not chubby /anymore/,” he said with a smile, and continued to listen to her talk about mental health, “so I need to find something to help kind of heal my mind, that time to myself, kind of thing, right? I’m not much of a writer, so I’m not sure how much of the daily journalling would really help.” Then she mentioned his week off, and it made him happy that she remembered him talking about it, “Yeah, yeah, Disneyland sounds like it’d be a great idea, a great getaway.”

Dove: Dove nodded at his question. “Yes just something for yourself. I mean you don't need to be a writer or anything. And there's different ways to journal. And it's only for you and no one ever needs to see it. So it can be as messy or as pretty as you feel like. It’s just your safe space to put all your thoughts to get them out.” The blonde pointed out. She smiled when he confirmed their Disneyland idea. She was really excited for it. “Perfect. I am so excited for that. Are you excited for the week off? Or do you love hockey so much that you don’t want a break?"

Jamie: “I’m excited for any week off, really” a smile plastered across his face, especially as the food was starting to be delivered to their table, as the plates were being at on the table in front of them, Jamie watched the blond, “So far this all looks amazing,” he said once the servers left the table, “Hopefully it tastes as good as it looks. Sticking a fork into the ahi tuna on top of his salad, it was so tender it was so easy for him to cut into it with his fork, taking a big bite, his face said it all “Ben was right, this place is so good.”

Dove: "So you love hockey but you're also grateful for a break. I am really excited to see you play, gotta be honest." she pointed out before glancing at the food being delivered. It looked amazing and she was so excited to dig in. She took her chopsticks and after adding some soy sauce and wasabi to her plate she took a piece of sushi between her chopsticks and put it into her mouth. "Hmmm" she hummed. It was absolutely amazing. Once her mouth was empty again she looked at him with a smile. "This is amazing. Thank you for bringing me here."

Jamie: Thanking him for bringing her here, “You’re welcome, Maybe you’ll meet Ben, he’s our goalie, he’s the one that recommended this place” th eating between the two was silent, it was obvious they were enjoying the food, every bite if it. Once Jamie was finished with his salad, he went to work on his sushi roll, making an audible ‘yum’ to the first bite. DInner was complete, and the older male leant back in his chair, “What do you think about coming to practice on Thursday, or maybe the practice before the game on Saturday?”

Dove: Dove had her mouth full when he asked her if she wanted to come to practice, she nodded enthusiastically while she finished chewing. "I would love that. Either one. Or both. Whatever works better." she added with a bright smile. "Since I was poking holes in you with all my questions the other day. Anything you want to know?" she questioned before putting the last piece of her sushi roll in her mouth, waiting to see if he wanted to know anything about her. She couldn't wait to learn more about the man in front of her and she could probably ask a thousand more questions to see what was going on in that head of his.

Jamie: He did want to ask her questions, like where did she grow up, what was her favorite food, how many cartoons did she watch growning up, but at the same time, there was something about her that he wanted to learn. You can ask people so many questions, but its when you start to get to know someone, everything comes to the surface anyway, “You know, nothing has really struck out to me that I really want to question you with, I kind of want to get to know you naturally, just small talk, none of those fancy questions... except one, you mentioned the other day that you and your sister have the same initials, for some reason, all I could think of that you and your sister were named after birds, and I couldn’t think of another D name...”

Dove: Dove smiled hearing him say that, hearing that he wanted to get to know her better naturally. She nodded at the question he did have for her. "Well.. Dove isn't my birth name. My parents named me Chloe when I was born, my sister's name is Claire. Two C's, you see?" she explained, a small smile on her lips. "Dove was the nickname my dad always called me when I was little. And when he passed away I decided to change my name to Dove in honor of him. So legally I'm Dove now." she explained. There was more to the story, more to her dad's story but that may be better kept for another time.

Jamie: “So, Dove isn’t a stage name?” was the first thing his mind registered right off the bat, but as he listened his natural instinct was kicking in, “I’m sorry to hear that about your father though, were you two close?” He didn’t know what to ask her at that point, he didn’t want to say too much. Having never lost a parent, he didn’t know how she was feeling. The waitress casually came over, apologized for interrupting and handed Jamie the check. Without even looking at the price, Jamie pulled out his wallet and slid it into the leather pamphlet and handed it back.

Dove: Dove shook her head. “I mean it sorta was at first but then I legally changed it to that. A lot of people I’m really close with call me Chloe though. So I listen to both” she explained. “We were yes. And I know he always is there with me wherever I go. I think what hurt the most was not being able to say goodbye to him.” She sighed. She knew her dad had his reasons but it still hurt to this day that he was gone. She watched the waitress place the check down and she couldn’t even react as quickly as Jamie had put his card in there.

Jamie: “Well, what would you prefer me to call you?” He leant forward resting his crossed arms on the table, “Or is the first date too early to ask that?” He didn’t know where to let the conversation go from here, but he loved the natural flow of their conversations so far, this time just being face to face. after he let her speak, and the waitress returned his car, he quickly scribbled his name and left a tip, before standing up, holding a handout for the blond, “So where else would you like to go in this city? There’s a good amount to see...”

Dove: The blonde debated for a moment what to tell him, she never really tells people what to call her rather just lets them choose what they feel is right. "Really whatever you prefer to call me. I answer to either." she told him with a smile. Taking his hand she stood up and followed him out of the restaurant. "Do you have any favorite spots? Or places with an amazing view where we can just sit and relax and talk?" she encouraged. She loved having people show her their favorite parts of the city they lived in, it can tell a lot about the person. And she also loved having an amazing view and really getting to spend time with the person she was on a date with.

Jamie: “It may be a little cold, but I’m a sucker for Top Golf not sure about you,” When she mentioned views, he knew one place they could go, she may enjoy it, but he may show his true fear on this first date, “Reunion Tower has some great views, you want to see Dallas from a better view? A bit higher up?” Jokingly he mentioned; “Or you could sit on my shoulders, that’d probably be a great view as well for you.”

Dove: "What's Top Golf?" the actress questioned a little puzzled as they walked towards his car. A laugh fell from her lips as he joked about getting a great view from sitting on his shoulders. "You're tall but maybe not tall enough for the best view over the city." she commented with a chuckle. "Oh is Reunion tower that big tower with the round ball at the top? Oh I bet the view is amazing from up there" she was quite excited but she almost wanted to wait a bit longer to see the sunset from up there, that would be even more amazing.

Jamie: He tried to think of the easiest way to explain Top Golf, “It’s basically a place to eat appetizers and practice your golf swing, Being a hockey player, I like playing golf, just to keep my swing up for on the ice, I am in no way the best golfer, so there’s that.” When she mentioned the Tower, he shook his head, “Yup that’s the one, they light it up different colours all the time too, It’s pretty cool up there, Which would you like to do?”

Dove: Dove nodded as she listened to the different options. "I'd love to do both but maybe let's do Reunion Tower today and save Top Golf for another date?" she suggested with a smile. This was her asking if he wanted another date with her because she sure wanted to see him more and continue to get to know him. She had had an amazing time at lunch with him and she was even more excited for the hockey game tomorrow and whatever was to follow after that.

Jamie: “Alright, Top Golf for another date, that means you want to see me again” He did a celebratory fist with a soft ‘yes’ with it as they climbed into his car and he started it, buckling up and then shifting the car into reverse, backing out of their parking spot, and then shifting it into gear, He knew the drive was going to be a bit of a long one when he noticed the traffic pulling out of the parking garage, When he was finally able to pull out into traffic, it was slow, just waiting for the nearby light to change, hopefully allowing them to get there. It wasn’t too late, but he knew this was the start of rush hour traffic.

Dove: The anxiety that had built up about her bringing up a second date quickly faded at his reaction to her question. A chuckle fell from her lips as she watched him pretty much celebrate that she wanted to see him again. "I do. Why wouldn't I want to see you again. I'm having a great time." she gently squeezed his hand while smiling at him before letting go and getting into his car. As soon as they were on the road she too could see the rush hour traffic. Her gaze shifted to him with a chuckle. "More time for us to talk I guess?" she pointed out. "So Jamie how much do you hate rush hour traffic?" she asked giggling while holding out her hand to his lips pretending to hold a mic in it.

Jamie: “Guess that means more of that ‘getting to know you’ time”, he said with a smile, when her hand came up with the invisible microphone, Jamie leant in to talk into it, getting obnoxiously close, ”Well you see Dove, I’m used to it, I hate it, but it’s a part of my daily life... it’s like a love/hate thing, and if I need to, I can always blame my lateness on traffic thanks to it.” Once he finished speaking, he brought his hand up, and put her small one in his, just as the light changed, he wanted to point out, that maybe she had the magic touch, but he kept it back, as much as he liked her, and how well this date was going, he didn’t want to ruin it. That was until they got to Reunion tower and she’d learn about his fear of heights.

Dove: She smiled when he took her hand in his but not even a second later he was focused on driving again because the light had changed to green. It took them a little while longer to get to Reunion Tower because of traffic, Dove in the meantime pointed out that LA traffic as well as New York City traffic were both horrible as well so it probably didn't even matter what city they were in. Once they were at their desired location the pair got out and made their way to the entrance to pay and then take the elevator up to the observation deck. Dove was excited to enjoy the view with him while spending the time to get to know him better.

Jamie: The crowd wasn’t too bad it was obviously a slow day for the city, so walking in, it was easy for them to get to the elevator. Jamie kept hold of Dove’s hand as the boarded the elevator. Once the elevator started, with a sigh, jamie directed himself towards the door, to try his hardest not to look out towards the city skyline, his hand gripping a bit tighter around doves. He knew he was probably getting a weird look from the blonde, he simply stated “I don’t like heights.”

Dove: The blonde was more than excited when she realised that they were on an elevator where you could look outside and watch as you went higher and higher. She smiled over at Jamie as he was holding her hand. She felt like their date was going great. As soon as the Dallas skyline appeared in front of her she could feel Jamie's hand holding on just a little bit tighter to hers. Her gaze shifted from the window towards him only to see him focus on looking anywhere but outside. And before she could even question what was going on he explained himself which earned a concerned look from her. Her free hand moved up to gently rub his shoulder. "We're almost up at the top. Are you gonna be ok up there?" she questioned just a little bit worried.

Jamie: “Yeah, I’m fine, I’ve done this before... once.” He glanced at her as much as he could without looking outside the window, I think it’s the feeling of going upwards, I can’t do. Once I’m up here, I’ll be fine.” in reality, he wasn’t sure how fine he was going to be. He did this a few years beforehand, and the summer before last he rode in a helicopter around Dallas, he could only hope his fear of heights was getting better. The doors opened and Jamie lead out with Dove and he was greeted by a wall of glass looking out towards the city, “Well, Welcome to the view” He motioned toward the window, with a small smile looking back towards here.

Dove: Dove listened to him, nodding softly hoping that he would feel better as soon as they were up at the top. When they exited the elevator she made it a point to keep his hand securely in hers, wanting to make sure he was ok. She looked out the big windows with a big smile on her face. The view was absolutely gorgeous, and she was excited to get to experience it with him. Her eyes shifted up to him. "Are you better?" she questioned. "We're not moving and we're safe up here. No need to worry, alright?" she smiled encouragingly up at him, hoping to cheer him up.

Jamie: “Yeah, I’m better”, his voice was a little bit shaky, “but honestly, it’d be better at night, cause the darkness hides the distance,” He looked over at her with another smile on his face, motioning towards a bench. The bench was near one of the large panes of glass looking out at the Dallas Skyline, “If anything, lets sit down,” Jamie was terrified being that close, but having Dove there with him, holding his hand seemed to help tone down the anxiety, especially when he’d look at her, no worry of the height just outside, I had a question, and I wanted to ask you earlier, but I just kind of feel that right now is the right time...” Biting his lip a small bit before he spoke, “Can I kiss you?”

Dove: Dove sat down with him. "I'm sure a sunset is beautiful from up here" she mused as she looked at him. She was still holding on to his hand, wanting to make sure he knew she was there for him even if he wasn't doing so well with the height. When he spoke her eyes focused on his, listening as he spoke. When he asked if he could kiss her she nodded softly. "Of course" she whispered, waiting and letting him make the first move considering last time she went for it and didn't ask him if it was okay.

Jamie: His free hand slid up behind her neck bringing her closer to him, bringing her in for a kiss, their lips met softly before Jamie let go of her hand to wrap an arm around her middle, bringing her smaller frame even closer to him. He felt like he was making up for the kiss that happened on January 1st, after how she kissed him, this was his continuation of the situation, enjoying every second of it.

Dove: Dove leaned into the kiss, one of her hands moved to his cheek while the other moved to rest on his chest. She never wanted this kiss to end it just felt way too good. And he seemed to be into as well. This kiss was a lot better than their kiss on New Year’s Eve, mainly because he got the be a more active participant. And they knew each other much better and there was an actual connection between them.

Jamie: The kiss was something Jamie was enjoying, but at the same time, they were in the middle of the public place and could be caught if they weren’t paying attention to what’s going on around them. As if coming up for Air, Jamie parted the kiss and looked over at the blonde, “That was a lot better than I was expecting,” He joked, the kiss was better than the one they shared on new years and he wanted to kiss her more.

Dove: Dove chuckled as her eyes looked into his eyes. “Did you expect the kiss to be bad?” She questioned unsure on what he had been expecting when he kissed her. “I mean it was better than I expected too but I already expected it to be great.” She gave him a smile as her thumb gently caressed his cheek.

Jamie: “I was messing with you, and it was so worth waiting two weeks for it as well” he leant in and gave her another quick peck on the lips, “now I don’t want to stop, you’re just too beautiful” his body posture was easing up, it could’ve been because his main focus was on her, but she did help him breath easier.

Dove: She smiled as she leaned in and initiated another kiss. “Hmm I agree. I really enjoy this” she whispered after her lips parted from his. “If someone sees us and recognizes us though this will spark loads of rumors.” She sighed. She didn’t want to stop either but she also knew how quickly these rumors tended to get started.

Jamie: With how popular Jamie was in Dallas, being the captain of the city’s hockey team, and with Dove being an actress, he was surprised they haven’t been noticed yet, but with how the tourism was down for the day, it most likely helped keep down the flow of people through that area, “We should probably get going... after this sunset.” They had been there a little while, so the sun was starting to show up on the horizon, letting the golden color sweep over them.

Dove: Dove nodded and smiled as she turned to look out the window to watch the sunset. Her head rested against his shoulder as she took his hand back into hers. “This is beautiful” she mused with a smile. “Thanks for taking me up here. Even though you’re afraid of heights”

Jamie: Jamie’s slips formed yet another smile caused by Dove, “Youre welcome, I’m glad you enjoyed it,” with her hand in his, he stroked the back of her hand with his thumb, the two of them sitting in that silence, just enjoying that moment together.

Dove: They stayed until the sun had completely set. Just in silence enjoying each other’s company and the surprisingly quiet reunion tower. She had expected a lot more people up there but she was really glad that that was not the case. This way they didn’t have to worry about being seen too much and actually got to enjoy their date together. Once the sun had set the blonde snapped a couple of pictures of the Dallas skyline as asking someone who was walking by to take a picture of the two of them together. The two stood with their backs towards the glass smiling at the camera. Dove had her arms wrapped around his waist, incredibly happy with how the day had gone.

Jamie: Jamie rarely felt something like this, especially this high in the air, he wasn’t sure if it was the nerves or just his stomach doing backflips, but he was pretty sure, there were some butterflies flying around inside him, and he was enjoying every moment. Once the two had their photo together, they made their way back to the elevator, happily taking it back down to the ground floor. With a small laugh, the brunette looked back at the blonde, “Back on solid ground.”

Dove: Dove chuckled a little "You feel a lot better now don't you?" she smiled at him before walking back to his car with him. "I want you to know I really enjoyed tonight. Thank you for inviting me to Dallas and for this amazing date. And I can't wait to watch you on the ice tomorrow." the blonde told him with a smile before they were going to get in the car. She wanted this to be said before they were in the car and somewhere where she could do what she was about to do next. She gently tucked on his hand to pull him a little closer before leaning up and kissing him again.

Jamie: The kiss he received once they were in the car was smooth and Jamie craved more, his hand coming up and cupping her cheek, almost as if to bring her closer to him, as close as being in the car could allow them. Once the two finished their mini make-out session, Jamie brought his attention abck to the vehicle and started the car, looking back over at the blond, “Back to your hotel? or would you want to head to my place?"

Dove: Dove bit her lip as she debated the options. Going home with him after their first date, she wanted to if she was being honest but she also knew she shouldn't. They should take it a bit slower and not do everything in one day. "I think the hotel for now. I'm so tired plus you have a game tomorrow you need your rest and not have me keep you up late. Some other day?" she suggested with a small smile, hoping she wasn't disappointing him too much.

Jamie: “That’s perfectly fine by me,” He started backing out of the parking spot and headed towards her hotel, “Besides your hotel is a shorter drive from her than my place is,” As he drove her said softly to her, “even though I was terrified, I had a really great time with you...”

Dove: Dove smiled happily as she let him drive. Keeping her hands to herself as she let him focus on the road in front of him. "I did too. I had an amazing time. And next time, don't suggest things that terrify you, alright?" she gave him a small smirk. "This is supposed to be a great time for both of us, you know? That's how dates work." she pointed out with a joking undertone.

Jamie: “Well damn, here I was hoping we’d do something you’re terrified of”, joking, he looked over at her momentarily, “I just wanted to show you Dallas, and how else could we do it besides seeing it from the sky” reaching over and setting his hand on her hand, letting his thumb stroke it once again, “Just know, I probably won’t be doing that again.”

Dove: "Not sure I'm willing to reveal what I'm terrified of" she replied, laughing softly as she glanced over at him. "Well thank you for showing me your city. And yes I realise heights will be avoided from here on out. Which still leaves plenty of other things to do" she pointed out with a big smile. His hand touching hers sent chills down her body, it made her feel so good and so happy.

#[ para.]#[ &. benn.]#[ p: first date ]

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attina-the-responsible · 7 years ago

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Sugar Bowl -- BDRPwrimo #10

In which Attina visits places she does not often frequent...

The sun was gone, leaving everything grey, grey, grey. Attina thought about the ocean a lot on these grey, grey days. The clouds in the sky looked like the surface of murky water. On these days, she could taste the rain in the air before it ever fell. Her skin could feel the moisture. She could smell it too, that sharp, almost metallic scent.

Usually, this made her smile. She was a sunshine girl--she wore bright colors and she was always smiling. Her skin practically sparkled in the brightness. But, stormy weather suited her, and it especially suited November.

Attina left the house and headed--nowhere, really. She just needed to get out of the house. Counted her steps as she walked with her head down, ponytail swinging behind her.

Step on a crack, break your mother’s back.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

Then, she started over.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

When she’d finally found herself stopping, it was in front of Scat Cat. She couldn’t go any further because the steps in front of her had too many cracks in them, she couldn’t step on any of them at all, the path before her cut off.

Into Scat Cat she went. It smelled a little damp, like most of the old buildings. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been in here. She smiled a little at Roger, though she moved quickly by him. Attina did not want to talk today, any words would be hard. Instead, she drifted in and out of the aisles like seafoam, looking over the records shoved into their holdings like sardines.

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z.

She bought an old Leonard Cohen album, placing it carefully in ts bag. She sat at the counter for two minutes after Roger had packaged it up for her, smoothing out the corners, making sure it fit perfectly in the square bag.

Roger was kind enough to divert his attention elsewhere.

Eventually, she wandered back out into the street.

Her feet took her next to the Garage, without thought. Her body tugged her towards the lake, like she could sit down at the bottom of it and just--forget. Maybe she could, maybe she should try. The lake was dangerous in the winter, it was far more suspicious to be skinny dipping when it was 0 degrees outside.

She heard the whir of some unidentifiable tool coming from the garage which made her jump, forget where she had been counting, which meant she had to count nine more times to get herself to move. Once that was done, she found herself walking towards the open garage door. She paid careful attention not to step on any of the lines in the concrete leading up to the garage.

Step on a line, break your mother’s spine.

Attina didn’t know what she was doing inside. She didn’t like cars. Cars were dangerous. The only reason she had learned to drive was if she had to, she was far too nervous otherwise. It had taken her three times to pass her test. (Though, she had failed her second one on purpose, because two wasn’t a good number. Three, three was a good number.)

No one noticed her, which was for the best. She didn’t want to speak to anyone.

She watched them lift a car and lower it back down and Attina thought: humans are amazing. You’re not human.

Eventually, she left, floating down the sidewalk towards the lake.

It had started to rain. She should probably put her hood up, but she didn’t. Instead, she turned her face to the icy droplets and let them splash against her cheeks like tears. She couldn’t cry. Attina hadn’t cried, not about this, in many years.

She breathed deeply. She opened her eyes and found herself in front of the Cathedral.

Attina had never been inside the Cathedral. Not really. It was a Mundus place. Her kind was not welcome in such establishments, because her kind was no better than dogs. They had no souls.

But, she pushed the door open and wasn’t struck by lightning.

She sat in the back, in the last pew. She was supposed to get down on her knees. Bow her head. Instead, she leaned back and stared up at the ceiling, all that wood--the arching lines the stretching shadows. Her eyes fluttered closed and she imagined a ceiling more beautiful than stained glass. She thought of sunlight streaming in through the top of the ocean, how the water always shifted, how the whole ocean felt alive.

This wood was not alive.

Humans always made such beautiful things out of the dead.

#bdrpwrimomk #self para #mervember #yes that is a tag now #sugar bowl #tbh i challenged myself and picked my hardest character #she literally goes EVERYWEHRE

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beckettsthoughts · 7 years ago

Note

all of the lighthearted autistic asks!!

This is amazing, I love people who send me these! I appreciate you so much, anon, you guys on here are some of my favourite people. I already answered a few in a previous ask, so I’ll do everything else:

(A) -

(B) -

(C ) What are some of your favourite stims?

My favourite stim is chewing! I usually contain this with my chew necklace, but if that’s not nearby then straws, sleeves, hoodie strings and my own tongue will be subject to my chew stimming. I also really like rocking back and forth, or people running their hands through my hair. Those are both amazing stims as well.

(D) -

(E) Give me four fun facts about your current special interest!

To make this a little more unique, I’m going to give you fun facts about my relationship with my special interest rather than just stuff you could find on Google. My main special interest, before we begin, is Fall Out Boy, and it’s been my special interest since before I was diagnosed.

1. The first Fall Out Boy song I recognised as a Fall Out Boy song was Sugar, We’re Goin Down. However, I already knew Dance, Dance and Thnks fr th Mmrs without having truly recognised or known the artist.

2. The first full Fall Out Boy album I bought, though, was Save Rock and Roll.

3. The moment I realised Fall Out Boy was my new special interest was when I spent a week obsessively checking the UK Charts website to see if AB/AP reached number one. Shocker, it didn’t. That title went to Mark Ronson instead, with Fall Out Boy stuck at number two. I was really salty about it at the time, because I was really hoping the album would nab that top spot. I’d never even looked at the chart website before, so something really stuck out to me about Fall Out Boy being a real, genuine interest of mine. I wasn’t diagnosed at the time and didn’t have the language to truly label it a special interest, but that’s when I knew it was more than my other interests.

4. I saw Fall Out Boy’s AB/AP tour in Bournemouth on October 11th, 2015. That was the first major concert I’d ever been to, I took time off school to travel and it was one of the best nights of my life. I have the setlist saved as a playlist on my phone, so I can listen through it just like I heard it that night.

(F) Are you a Quiet Autistic or a Loud Autistic?

A mix. I’m very, very talkative when I’m around people and I have incredibly poor volume control, so I come across as a Loud Autistic. However, I spent vast quantities of time alone, with my laptop volume kept low and myself completely silent. People don’t tend to see that so often, though, so to most people I come across as Loud. I actually link that to my ADHD more than autism, though, because I speak very quickly as well as very loudly.

(G) Are you mostly a Sensory Seeker or Sensory Avoider?

Oh, I’m more of a sensory avoider. I avoid bright lights, loud and discordant crowds, anything too hot or too cold. I will seek out tactile stimulation or movement, but otherwise I am very much a sensory avoider.

(H) Are you a Lots Of Clothes Autistic (big jackets, long pants, boots) or a Minimal Clothes Autistic (tank tops, shorts, flip flops)?

I am a Lots Of Clothes autistic for sure. I only wear short sleeves if it’s very warm in the summer, otherwise I’m wearing hoodies and jeans and my trenchcoat. I even sleep in full length pyjamas, no matter what time of year. If I have too many layers to keep track of then I can get uncomfortable, but my comfort clothes will always be sweatshirts and joggers. I feel very uncomfortable and exposed if I’m wearing shorts or just t-shirts.

(I) What’s the cutest/sweetest thing anyone has ever done to accommodate you?

Oh man, there’s too many instances for me to choose the absolute best, so instead I’ll just describe a recent moment that really stood out to me. A while ago, I was invited by a friend from school to a beach barbecue. This particular friend has always been super understanding of what it means that I’m autistic, and she allowed me to invite a plus one. I assumed that she’d allowed everyone a plusI ended up not being able to take anyone along because my close friends were busy, but I later learnt that she specifically asked me because she knew I would be more comfortable with if I could bring a close friend with me. I ended up not being able to bring anyone along, because the people I would ask were otherwise busy, but I really appreciated that gesture.

(J) Do you have any pictures that really show that you’re autistic? Not that there’s any wrong or right way to look autistic, but any pictures that you feel show your specific brand of autism!

I can’t think of any specific image, but if I showed you all of my photos from throughout my life you would probably see a running them in what I’m wearing and how I stand or position myself. You can see me wearing a lot of the same clothes, my favourites and most sensory-friendly options, and you can often see photos of me drawing or writing regardless of the setting. Up until a few years ago, I’d also always have certain toys in tow.

(K) What’s your favourite sensory friendly outfit? Do you have a picture?

Unfortunately I can’t show you my home comfort clothes, because I never take pictures in that. It’s just a combination of a sweatshirt and joggers. However my sensory friendly outfits for actually leaving the house can be seen in most of my selfies, or in any of my mirror photos on my side-blog. The usual combination is my black skinny jeans, one of a rotation of t-shirts, and my long trenchcoat with all the clasps on it. That’s my most comfortable outfit.

(L) What do you call raptor/kitty/t-rex hands?

I didn’t have a name for them for the majority of my life, but when I got involved with autistic communities online I saw the term ‘raptor hands’ and picked that phrase up pretty quickly. I like the sound of it, too.

(M) Did you take on any animal mannerisms as a kid? What animal?

Lions! I used to have a tiny toy lion, and I always pretended to be a lion when I was running around and ‘playing pretend’. Cats were a running theme in general, actually. I used to be able to scale all the furniture and lay across the back of the sofa, curl and climb my way up the banister of the stairs and crawl my way beneath tables and lay there rather than sit on a chair.

(N) What were your go-to foods/samefoods as a kid?

Chicken nuggets, pasta and cheese, and a particular snack dinner my mother put together known as ‘cheese, ham and apple’. It was, well, a plate of cheese, ham and apple, all in chunks. Roast dinners were always safe, too.

(O) What are your go-to foods/samefoods now?

Cheeseburger, simple pasta bolognese, and margherita pizza. Chicken nuggets are still up there, but I’m way pickier about them now and I prefer them battered to breaded, which means I don’t often get them. I have roast beef dinners fairly often, homemade in the winter and pre-prepared from M&S in the summer, and I also have a particular type of instant pasta I really rely on at the moment. French bread is a go-to, as well, if I don’t want anything else.

(P) -

(Q) Ask your own question!

To anyone who sees and wants to answer this, my question is as follows:

What is your favourite thing about being autistic?

#b replies #autism stuff #ask meme #long post #<3 <3 <3 #special interest stuff

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