#Saren is just in the corner chewing a seed and critiquing Garrus' form

[ramblinganthropologist]

N7 Challenge 17  - Happiness

Summary: Even in dark times, Alistair can find a little happiness when it comes time to clean the cage. Animal husbandry is practically second base, right?

---

The only thing better than getting to see Garrus' ass was getting to see it when he was hanging a tarp over the skylight. Of course, there was the downside of it being uncovered in the first place. Fuck the retrofit team on that one...

Then again, the whole sucked into space to die thing was really more Alistair's problem. Most people didn't come back from that one, so... maybe he should be a little more sympathetic.

…

Nah. Fuck the retrofit team.

“Do I have it straight?”

Garrus, unlike Alistair, didn't need a chair to reach. He was just fine stretching the tarp over the expanse. In a matter of seconds, he had the most hateful space hole covered up with a bright blue bed sheet they had found on the Citadel. Now he was just sticking it in place.

“Yeah, it looks fine.” He sighed in relief. “Thanks, babe. It's been hard sleeping since I got back to the Normandy because of it.”

Well, that and the whole Reaper thing. But technically, both of them were off duty at the moment so they were trying their best not to bring that up. Something about the reminder of species-destroying, planet fucking synthetic lifeforms really killed the mood.

“No problem, Al. Glad I could help.”

Something about the turian's nickname made Alistair smile as he leaned against the wall, watching Garrus clean up. It had taken him long enough to use his name at all, much less the shortened version. Talk about a turian's sense of duty... but at least they had broken the habit of calling him Shepard.

Like... they had fucked a few times. That was a sort of first name basis thing.

“Well, neither of us are back on duty for a couple hours...” Garrus sat down on the bed, and the look in his eyes was nothing but indecent. “Have any ideas on how to fill them?”

Alistair chuckled despite himself as he pointed to the wall. “Unfortunately, Saren's cage needs cleaning. He didn't like what the retrofit team did with the place either.”

Right then, the space hamster's terrain was an unholy mess. Bedding was everywhere, and he had turned over two of his hides. Somewhere in that mess he was probably plotting to bite the shit out of Traynor should he ever get close enough. He was lucky Saren didn't have fingers, or he was pretty sure the little guy would have broken out to achieve his mission.

It was only natural; he had survived the Omega 4 Relay too after all. That sort of thing gives a hamster a real chip on his furry little shoulder.

“Cock blocked by a hamster then?” Garrus chuckled, a sound that did terrible things to his insides. “Mind if I lend a hand? It's been ages since I've seen the little guy.”

That got Alistair laughing as he started to dig into his hamster supplies. “Sure, if you can find him. After he went Hurricane Saren on his enclosure, I have no idea where he's hiding out. Usually he likes under his wheel, but...”

Garrus finished for him. “He flipped that too I see. Are you sure he's a space hamster and not some horrifying mini pyjak?”

Yeah, the hands were all wrong. Still, the Spectre chuckled as he pulled out bedding and his cleaning tools. Today's color was blue, so at least Saren was getting a pop of color in his enclosure. Maybe he could add the palm tree chew and a rock hide too... give him a little island getaway.

Yep, island theme cage. He could see it now.

Humming to himself, Alistair brought everything over to the wall that contained Saren's enclosure. He popped the panel out and reached in to start tidying things. Much to his surprise, the scurrying of tiny feet soon followed.

And then Saren tried to bite the shit out of his finger.

“Well, someone's grumpy.”

Alistair made sure to keep his fingers out of the way as the space hamster came barreling out of his hiding spot. Something about his beady eyes being so laser focused on carving out a pound of flesh for the indignity of the move was charming. Of course, his teeth hurt like hell so he wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of getting a bite in. At least Saren got the chance to look intimidating as he worked out who was coming to see him.

He calmed down once he realized it was the food guy. Worked like a charm.

“Someone looks fierce today.” Garrus' voice was softer as he peered over. “I thought space hamsters were nocturnal.”

Yeah, but... space was funny like that. Normally, Saren wouldn't be up for a few more hours. The move had probably displaced his internal clock, so used to the set time on the Citadel where he had been staying during Alistair's house arrest. Now that he was back on ship, he was making adjustments too. Apparently, they made him a little cranky.

He could appreciate that – the Reapers fucking everything up made him a little cranky too.

“Guess he's still adjusting to being back on the Normandy.” He carefully reached out to stroke Saren's furry little head. When he came back with all his fingers attached, Alistair held out both hands. A few seconds later, he was pulling his hamster out of the enclosure. “Aw, there's my little guy. Don't worry, I'm not the retrofit team.”

Garrus chuckled softly above him. “Going to be a little hard to clean his cage and play with him. I can keep an eye on him while you work if you want.”

Alistair blinked, trying to process the words. If he didn't know better... but the meaning shined through. His heart honestly skipped a beat as he turned to face the turian, Saren still cupped in his hands for safety.

His boyfriend wanted to hold his hamster. They had officially reached a new stage in the relationship. Fuck bases, animal husbandry was where it was really at.

“You sure?”

His mandibles twitched – he was embarrassed. “I mean I held Colonel Fluffytail back on the old Normandy once...”

Right, Alistair remembered that, partially because the sight of Garrus cuddled up with his now departed hamster had almost made his heart stop. What could he say, he was a sucker for strong men with cute animals.

And, even better, he had long since taught the turian the basics of not killing a space hamster, so no worries about that.

“If he starts getting too rambunctious or he bites you, I can take him back.” Alistair carefully held out his hands as Garrus extended his, talons down. Saren scampered across the bridge and was soon lifted up to the turian's cowl.

Cue the heart stopping. Fuck, it was too cute. He needed to work or he'd never get anything done.

So he turned away and started spot-cleaning. Once that was done, on went the new blue bedding to mimic an ocean in the corner. Since the older stuff was white, he could practically see the sandy beach in his mind. Something about that made him smile as he turned to get the palm tree chews.

Then he almost dropped them.

“Been a while, little guy. You're getting kinda chubby. Did Al's niece fatten you up while you were gone?”

Garrus was carefully stroking Saren's head with the blunt side of his finger. His voice was so low it was almost a whisper, yet the translator still managed to pick it up. All the while, Saren was cuddled up close to his scarred mandible, looking more peaceful than he had in months.

Alistair kind of forgot how to breathe in the moment, but could you blame him?

It was hard then to not see the turian a few years down the line – well ,maybe a lot of years down the line – with a small turian next to him. He would probably use that exact same tone, wear that similar look that was so full of caring and affection. Those talons could probably put toys together or hold a crying small one...

…

Where the hell had that come from?

Alistair blinked as he looked down at the palm tree chew in his hands, still needing to be put in the cage. Definitely not from the wood. He shook his head and shuffled back to the cage, propping the palm tree near the edge of the 'water'. Then he added a bit more bedding to shore it up before flipping the wheel right-ways.

“It's looking good. Much less tornado alley now.”

Garrus was speaking in normal tones now as he handed over the rock hide he had pulled from his collection. Heart still pounding, Alistair accepted it and placed it over the tunnel Saren had used to escape his underground lair. It was basically perfect now – he just needed to refill the water now.

“I hope he likes it.” At least his tongue worked now. “He seems fond of you.”

The turian chuckled low – it was that chicken sound Alistair had come to love. “I think it's because the guy who feeds him has a thing for me. Don't pets guess that sort of thing?”

That got the Spectre chuckling as he elbowed Garrus in the side – to no affect, of course. He was a turian after all, that's what the carapace was for. “I have a thing for you?”

“Something like that, it was kind of hard to tell when you were making me beg last night.” But then he stopped and patted Saren on the head. “Er, maybe I should save that kind of talk for when this little guy's back home. Don't want him getting the wrong idea.”

Laughter filled the room as Alistair needed to lean against the wall. It was the strong, soul-scraping type of laughter he had been sorely needing with everything going on. Definitely dislodged some of the crap that had been building up inside him. When he was able to straighten up again, he felt lighter. The burden wasn't completely gone yet, but it felt lighter.

He felt better.

“I think he's well aware of that by now, babe.” Alistair wiped his eyes, still chuckling a little. “He's nocturnal.”

Garrus' mandibles flapped in embarrassment as he stroked Saren's head. Classic avoidance gesture, with a furry pal to pair up. “Oh... right.”

He nodded to the cage, careful not to dislodge his ride-on buddy. “Time to put him back in, then? He probably wants to check out his summer getaway.”

Alistair nodded and held out his hands once Garrus had hold of his pet. Soon, Saren was back behind glass. Within seconds, he had zipped to the rock hide and disappeared from view. Somewhere, in his hidden tunnel system, he was a happy camper.

Good. He deserved a little happiness.

“I take that as a good sign he approves of your layout change.” Garrus reached down to squeeze his hand. “Unless he's secretly plotting revenge against us.”

One again, the Spectre chuckled as he squeezed back. “No, I think he approves. Usually he kicks bedding if he isn't happy.”

It would take until tomorrow to know for sure, but as long as the food bowl stayed right side up he could be content with his job.

“Well, you would know.” Garrus squeezed again, but then he was glancing to the bed again. “So... we still have time...”

This time, when Alistair chuckled there was nothing friendly about it. He felt his voice shifting to the lowest it would go as he placed his hand on the front of the turian's carapace. “Oh? Is that so, Vakarian? Well...  I'd be more than happy to correct your form.”

And then with a push, Garrus was on the bed. Lucky for them, Saren was buried under a lot of substrate. After all, they had a couple hours to themselves – might as well make the most of them. And now that the skylight was properly covered...

Well, he felt ready to go the extra mile, let's just say that.