#S.O.T.I Cut Stories

[groovesnjams]

[[ GROOVES N JAMS S.O.T.Y. 2018 ]] [ nO. 22/50 ]

“Alabama” by Tracyanne & Danny

DV:

I mentioned earlier this week that “Heaven’s Only Wishful” was one of many songs that might be the year’s saddest, and here’s another! “Alabama” never says her name, but it’s about Tracyanne Campbell’s bandmate Carey Lander, who died of bone cancer in 2015. And while you can stretch and read the song as being about any kind of separation, there’s a finality to a lyric like “We're keeping you in mind/ You made us so happy” that makes it clear this isn’t a run-of-the-mill breakup story. This is undeniably a huge part of what makes “Alabama” so affecting; that it’s a catchy, uptempo tribute rather than a solemn lament somehow makes it both harder and easier to approach. Campbell’s always had a way of writing that’s at once straightforward and oblique, where I can instantly relate to half of whatever she sings and fill in the other half with whatever I need, making my own sense of her story and letting its emotional impact be exactly as little or as much as I can handle. So when she sings, “When I'm an old lady/ I'll still miss you like crazy/ Oh” and I know this one can’t be generalized, know she means Carey, there’s an intensity to the song I wasn’t quite ready for at first - one that nine months later I’m still not sure what to do with, except feel overwhelmed for five minutes.

MG:

To be blunt, this is not my experience with grief. But this was a really strong year for death songs, so I think there’s something for everyone and I like “Alabama” a lot even if its warmth and comfort is far removed from what I think death is like. So, we had honorable mentions for this, but I think I’d be remiss if I didn’t add “Now Only” by Mount Eerie and “Me and My (To Bury Your Parents)” by Andre3000 to this conversation. Each deals with a different sort of loss (friend, partner, parent) and different sort of death (cancer, sudden) so whether you’re experiencing grief or you’re just curious about the shapes it takes, there’s a lot to dig into this year. 

Now, to dig into “Alabama” specifically, it reminds me so much of My Maudlin Career, and I think that’s deliberate. The American South is a backdrop again, Campbell’s on the road again, and she’s -- to get a little indulgent -- singing from her heart again. There’s a decided difference between the cutting and precise “Books Written for Girls” (for example) and the sweet stickiness of “Honey in the Sun.” On “Alabama,” Campbell is in her latter mode. But unlike that batch of love songs, parsing through a break-up and moving onward and outward on her own, here she’s missing the person who came with her back then. We don’t really do anything all on our own. Ultimately, though “Alabama” is very sad, it makes me happy because it adds that crucial dimension to (presumed now defunct) Camera Obscura’s previous work and because the old lady line is so gloriously hopeful. It’s hard to think you’re ever going to be an old lady when someone who was also supposed to one day be an old lady dies much too soon. We’re encouraged to live in the present but grief is such a shitty, interminable present that forcing yourself there is a potent form of asceticism. The past is a mirage, and while the future is no guarantee, Campbell finds a way to make it real. Carey Lander will always be with her.