#Presented today for no particular reason (lying)

[theinnermeyoullneverknow]

I've been looking for this comic for AGES. I first saw it years ago on facebook where the person who shared it was like "eh my life sucks actually. PUSH THE BUTTON FISH." And now every time I see or hear anything about cuttlefish, my immediate thought is "push the button, fish!"

I can't find any trace online of the comic except for this Reddit post which appears to be a repost and doesn't give the source of the image (as far as I can tell. Idk exactly how to use reddit tbh), much less evidence whatsoever of the Facebook post I remember. If anyone can point me towards the artist I'll be very grateful.

[amarynthian-chronicles]

Tip the Scales Chapter 1

Prosecutor Sun, Prosecutor Moon, Judge Eclipse x Defense Lawyer (Devil's Advocate) Reader

(You are a charismatic defense lawyer in a constant competition with two ruthless prosecutors that do not understand your ideals about criminals deserving a second chance. You are also housemates with a certain bitter and retired judge, who has a habit of operating at night as a cloaked figure known as the Judge of the Damned. Things get complicated when your old friend Monty gets accused of a murder he claims to not have committed willingly. Will you balance the scales once more?)

Warnings: suggestive themes, possessive behaviour, mentions of violence

There was a particular universal truth that court employees would never dare to admit about court proceedings: not a single one of them actually wanted to be there. Those that did enjoy being present during a session were either lying to themselves or were being paid obscene amounts of cash to pretend to care. In other extreme cases, it was all a part of unhinged ambition sprinkled with a dash of insanity.

Normally the whole process was a dreary affair, varying from sordid and depressing, all the way to showing what an administrative inferno the whole institution had become over time. True to the Dickensian fashion of describing things, one could say that the gloomy and omnipresent fog that had consumed the city with the arrival of Fall was equally present in the courtroom itself, both metaphorically and literally, entering every pore and chilling everyone to the bone.

However, in our specific situation things were getting quite heated. The cold September fog had been rudely pushed aside by the steam of intense and fiery debate you were having with prosecuting attorney Sun.

A bitter rivalry existed between you and the celestial-themed animatronic, but over the past year it seemed to have bloomed into obsessive fascination on Sun's part. We could classifiy it as another universal truth that one was bound to eventually become infatuated and captivated by their “nemesis“.

Placing you two in the same room was a very bad idea. Or a very good idea, it honestly depended on who you asked. For instance, the general public that had come to listen to your long nonsensical argument had arrived there for the sole purpose of finding out whether you two would passionately kiss somewhere in the middle of the whole discussion.

The suspense was maddening, the tension was more than palpable. One of the clerks was fanning himself with a folder, wondering whether or not he had taken his heart medication earlier.

“Could somebody open a window, please?“

There had always been an unusually thin line between love and hatred, enemies and lovers, but somehow it seemed oddly fitting for you and Sun to combine both at the same time with no problem.

After a well crafted comeback, believing himself to be the victor, Sun winked at you, triumphant and his grin wide and sinister.

“Was that as good for you as it was for me?“

“My dear sir, I cannot say, I hardly even felt anything.“

“I was under the impression that we have long abandoned this little “playing hard to get“ scenario.“

“Goodness, that sounds serious, delusions could be a sign of a system malfunction, you should get that checked, Sun.“

“Don't be so high and mighty. You will lose today, both the case and the little bet we made.“

“Oh, my, so ominous. I sure am devastated on the inside, inconsolable, I shall probably never recover.“

You were driving him insane. Healthy competition was usually highly encouraged, but this was beyond ridiculous. No matter how eloquent and skillful he was in the art of rhetoric, you refused to yield. You were still a relatively young jurist, having passed the bar examination barely two years prior, but your legal reasoning was unusually innovative and your application of creative solutions to impossible problems was astounding. There wasn't a single thing that Sun could throw at you without you catching it and throwing it ten times harder right back at him.

The judge, an elderly man that was diligently counting down the days till it was socially acceptable to retire from what was regularly a life tenure, was listening to the two of you bicker as if it were the latest installment of his favourite picture show series. He wondered if he should simply let you silly lovebirds borrow his chambers for a minute or two. Or thirty, wherever the feeling takes you. He was very supportive.

He was also the only judge in the building willing to tolerate the nonsense that you and the Celestial Prosecutors kept pulling off in the courtroom. It was free entertainment and he needed some amusement in his old age. The rest of the judicial assembly would have to pull straws each time a new case had to be assigned.

He remembered how different things had been a few years prior.

It was an open secret that the judicial assembly missed the old days when the esteemed Judge Eclipse had still been in office, before his abrupt retirement under unusual circumstances. Eclipse would always volunteer to do all the work, snatching case files from everybody's hands and closing himself in his chambers, leaving the possibility for the rest of the assembly to simply enjoy their coffee and gossip in the conference room.

Intense and immensely dedicated to his work, unyielding, unforgiving and merciless, Eclipse had been akin to a dark deity of the afterlife, deciding the fate of souls that had succumbed to corruption. His golden eyes had held nothing but pure contempt for evildoers, his mechanical heart perpetually hungry for the suffering of the wicked. Court sessions under his administrations had been a thing of horror for some and an example of a job well-done for others. Deranged and disproportionate punishments had made Eclipse quite unpopular in the criminal milieu, and there had been quite a few attempts on his life that would usually end up with the assassins themselves having their spines twisted into a pretty pretzel.

Self-defense, clear-cut, no questions asked, nobody left to mourn a few dismembered rulebreakers.

The euphoria had been too intoxicating, the flesh of Evil too delicious, the screams of the damned a symphony unmatched.

One thing had lead to another, interfering into interrogations, conflict of interest, violating every possible rule of criminal procedure, prisoners being found dead in their cells, acquitted individuals dying under suspicious circumstances mere days after their release.

The courthouse and law enforcement would always turn a blind eye. Whispers in the corridors, silent gasps in the archive rooms, everybody knew of Eclipse's tendencies, his desire to play god. Nobody had dared to make a fuss about the whole situation, not even when a few fellow judges that had been accused of bribery had one day "mysteriously" disappeared. It was all a silent approval. Crime statistics had been fixing themselves, who would dare interfere?

Deciding to return to topics less grim and vile, the current judge smiled fondly at the prosecutors and the sly defense lawyer before him. Such a sweet change, whimsy and passion reigning supreme, banishing the sepulchral dread of olden times.

Contrary to custom, Sun was working with his brother Moon by his side. It was definitely unusual for two prosecutors to work together on same cases and appear in court as a team, but nobody had ever complained about it and regulations had no explicit rule against it. It was Moon's duty to make a thorough research and keep Sun informed of any new facts or legal acts in order for Sun to prepare a proper presentation to enthrall everyone in the courtroom or ask for appropriate actions.

They used all of their individual strengths and skills to achieve the best results. Reminiscent of their older brother's inclinations, their methods and ruthless determination in the pursuit of their version of justice at all costs had become notorious, eventually making the general public refer to them as the Grand Inquisitors.

All of that aside, the two of them still had to make sure that each investigation went perfectly by the books and that there were no irregularities made by law enforcement in the initial stages of each investigation. Being a prosecutor was akin to being a sea captain that constantly kept hoping that his crew was sober. One single mistake meant that the other party would pounce on it like a feral animal.

And pounce you did.

For instance, you were easily capable of rendering a whole confession useless by claiming it was inadmissible evidence obtained through coercion. It was no trouble for you to stage a whole scene.

You had pulled off such a stunt a few times in the past and the results would always follow a hilarious pattern: the confused police officers would simply blink and question their general reality on whether they had truly applied excessive force, the public audience would try not to snack too loudly on the popcorn they had brought, the defendant would do his best to keep crying and keeping his story straight about how absolutely devastated and tortured he was, the judge would hope that no reporters would come crawling in the courtroom and asking about human rights violations. Again.

The celestial twins were unused to such audacity and blows to their pride. Sun and Moon had always been a powerful force that had never known the meaning of failure, the playing field had been theirs to dominate and it was pure madness to even think that anyone could place an end to that. And then you showed up and suddenly the courtroom was a circus, you were the ringmaster and you turned the two of them into the lead jesters of the whole show.

They were furious with you for making a mockery of their act. How dare you?

Moon did his best to remain subtle with his temper, even if his pencils did audibly snap in half from time to time. He had to keep an appearance a patient man, someone courteous and polite. It was of great importance to keep that thick layer of ice above the boiling madness that stirred deep within.

Oh, how you tested his patience still. It all kept accumulating, over and over, cracking the ice bit by bit.

He could write a masterpiece of scholarly analysis and a seemingly perfect reconstruction of events, and you would destroy all of that effort simply by telling him he wrote a date wrong, messing up the entire chronology and all further conclusions, rendering the whole thing useless. You always tripped him with the little things, formalities, so many tidbits that made the whole construction fall apart.

The devil was in the details, after all.

Speaking of which, since the majority of your clients were desperate people that had strayed from the morals of society into a life of crime for mere survival, you had earned yourself the title of Devil's Advocate among your colleagues. The world of your clients, however, was quite grateful for your services and assistance, all of them calling you their Fairy Godparent.

You got them out of trouble, you found them alternatives and new respectful jobs, you gave and gave, granting wishes and making them all happily dance to your music. If anyone had issues or needed help, they knew who to come to. You were waiting with good life advice, cupcakes, a hot cup of coffee and assurance that you would solve all of their problems. In many cases, you were the last angel before the gates of Hell for them, grasping their hand and pulling them back to safety.

After all, placing their fate in your hands was a far better alternative than sinking deeper into darkness and one day being inevitably visited in the middle of the night by the Judge of the Damned, having their life taken as the midnight bells rang.

Because of this looming threat, you did your best to save each soul you came across.

In this particular case, it was a young man that had gotten himself in some serious trouble after associating with a dangerous faction of drug dealers. Such business always came with its risks and there was no true loyalty nor help if someone got caught. Moreover, it was common practice to silence the person from revealing the others by simply ordering their assassination in prison. The young man had gotten way in over his head, too ambitious and too confident in his own abilities, intoxicated with the romantic ideas of what he had seen in movies.

His older brothers had approached you for help after his arrest and you had accepted, of course. You would get the boy out of trouble, free of charge, under the condition that he dedicated himself to getting his life back on track and you would be making sure things stayed that way.

Sun was still waiting for you to speak, and the rest of the room was wondering whether or not you were truly speechless this time or if you were simply preparing something spectacular. Of course, it was the latter. You had pulled a lot of strings and cashed in a few favours, but it was all for a good cause. You heard Sun's impatient voice:

“Ready to admit defeat? There is no conceivable way for you to counter any of this evidence, it is over.“

“Only for those that lack the imagination to do so. I call in question the credibility and the competence of your toxicology expert. You cannot claim that my client was in possession or consuming a certain substance, if its chemical components do no even match what you claim it to be.“

“Pure cocaine was found on his person. He has been known to associate himself with dangerous smugglers of forbidden narcotics.“

“A second analysis, that I took the liberty of ordering from another expert, proved that it was mere flour.“

“Excuse me?“

“He is a baker's apprentice. Poor boy, he is just keeping all of that secret out of shame, which is why we did not mention this earlier, by the way. Alas, I cannot keep this silence anymore, for I must act in his best interest. You see, ever since he was a small lad, it was his dream to make fine Danish pastries, but everyone in his general vicinity was obsessed with the whole “dashing gangster“ persona that is so popular right now, so no wonder that this sad young man, just look at his eyes, this poor innocent child tried to emulate all of that simply to get some respect from his cruel peers. So, he walked around with flour and pretended that it was cocaine. It is all because of societal pressure.“

Had Sun been gifted with a detachable jaw, it would have fallen on the floor by now. It was madness. Your claim was pure madness. He wasn't certain, but he did feel as if all of his systems were about to crash down in a sad attempt at self-preservation. Moon's crimson eyes had turned black and he seemed as if he were silently rebooting himself. It was best for everyone to have him unconscious for a bit, otherwise he would have probably gotten violent. The stenographer stopped typing and blinked at you in a very “what the actual hell“ manner and the old judge took his glasses off emphatically as people normally do in such situations for no specific reason other than dramatic effect.

“God, I haven't felt this much excitement since my last divorce.“

The defendant was very much surprised to hear this as well. He gestured for you to come closer and whispered to you:

“I am a baker's apprentice?“

“You are now. Be the role, become the role, make the rolls. Also, you start next Monday at five in the morning, I got everything already arranged with the baker on main street. This whole process should by over by then.“

“What? The only dough I know how to roll is the monetary one.“

“You learn while you live.“

The poor man looked at you with the expression of someone that would really rather just go to prison than go through such blood pressure oscillations.

His brothers, three friendly chaps in dashing suits, homburg hats and leather gloves, were all smiling and holding a thumbs up in encouragement. He turned around to look at them with a genuinely desperate expression. Listening to this nonsense was punishment enough, regardless if he did the crime or not. They had assured him that you were the best, but nobody ever said that your methods were the sanest.

You cleared your throat and spoke up again:

“In light of this and to support these claims, I enclose all the necessary documents and I am prepared to call the relevant new witnesses if you agree, Your Honour.“

“I can adjourn, I personally got no problem with continuing this on a later day of the week. I have to tell you, you kids are keeping me young, I always thought that my later years in life would be boring. Boy, I sure was wrong.“

A partially drunk man from the spectator area began to clap.

“Bravo!“

The bailiff looked over at him.

“What are you clapping for?“

“I thought this was the theatre.“

“It's a courtroom, is what it is.“

“What's the difference?“

Just as you were about to sit down, Moon was suddenly by your side, having miraculously finished his little reboot session and feeling more energized than ever. It was rather concerning, since he was capable of pulling such a stunt within mere seconds, changing location so fast before you could even register it. You had a theory that he was probably capable of some type of flight or teleportation.

You made a little squeak of surprise as you felt his hands on your shoulders, pulling you close to his face plate, crimson eyes trying to cut your soul to shreds. Nevertheless, you refused to lose your decorum and you kept up an air of aristocratic disinterest.

“May I help you, sir?“

“Don't give me that. You know exactly what you are doing. I am not letting you humiliate us like this again.“

“And you are going to make things better for yourself by intimidating me in public like this? I really want to know what the plan is, I'm curious now.“

“Curiosity will kill you one day, little devil fairy.“

“I am certain that satisfaction will bring me back. What exactly do you want from me?“

He squeezed your shoulders and began to lightly massage them. It was oddly pleasurable, since you were tense and tired. Moon's voice was low, raspy, almost a whisper, akin to that of a nocturnal demon that haunted the shadows and ruled over nightmares.

“What goes around comes around and one day I will humiliate you, as well. I will tear those fairy wings apart.“

“Do you think I am afraid of you?“

“You should be. But, yes, I do have an additional request. Meet us in the conference room as soon as we are done here. We wish to talk.“

For a moment it seemed as if the two of you had forgotten that you were in an oddly compromising embrace in front of the entire courtroom. The same man from the spectator area whispered to the bailiff:

“Is this when the smooching starts? I could have sworn I read it somewhere in the play synopsis.“

“This is not the theatre!“

“Listen, Shakespeare once said that the whole world is a stage. He also said that we should kill all the lawyers, though, but I vote that we keep these three here, I need to know what happens next.“

A normal person would refuse to accept Moon's request after his little outburst, but you wished to talk to him and Sun, as well. Perhaps the old saying of “keep your friends close and your enemies closer“ had some wisdom to it, but you also genuinely wished to somewhat make peace with them. Maybe even explain your perspective and your ideas of justice to them. If things got really wild, possibly even form some fragile bond of friendship.

“Alright, I will be there, I just need some time to get my things first and I will also fetch a cup of coffee.“

You pushed him away and he allowed you to do so. However, his gaze was still on you even as everyone had risen and prepared to leave for the day. He watched you as you cheerfully talked with your client and his family, so warm, so caring. They gave you presents to show their appreciation, bags full of chocolates, teddy bears and a ridiculously large plush rabbit. Such whimsical things, childish and ridiculous, and yet your eyes almost had sparkles from how happy you were.

You were considered a beauty by many, but you were not coquettish, ignoring any amorous comments with your usual aristocratic disdain. Your hair was long and soft, well taken care of, but there were always a few little disobedient tufts that almost appeared like tiny and cute devil horns. It was impossible to straighten them out and you simply let them be.

You had a penchant for black pinstripe suits. However, the professional sterness was mitigated by the presence of a star-shaped pink diamond brooch pinned to the striped bow on your chest area. Moon found it conveniently suitable for your “fairy godparent“ aesthetic. The diamond would catch even the faintest amounts of light, reflecting it on surrounding walls to signify that you were approaching. You were wondrous, gentle hues of pink always heralding your arrival.

Sun spoke to him as the two of them made their way to the conference room, distracting him from his reveries:

“They are so cold to us and yet so warm to them. Did you see that smile?“

“Our fairy sees value in miscreants and mongrels. It is only a matter of time before those strays bite the hand that feeds them and then the little fool will come crying to us.“

“It would be cruel of us to refuse them a warm embrace, brother.“

Moon pondered the thought, the potential image of you in a disheveled state, disappointed and heartbroken. There was something wonderfully poetic about the idea of your rose garden withering away. It was a fair trade for all the times you kept trying to ruin their own view of the world. He and Sun were the righteous hands of justice and not even you could protect your little army of demons forever, shielding them with your dark angel wings till one day their final feather crumbles to dust. A misguided fallen little seraph had to have limits.

Sun and Moon waited for good while for you to arrive. Getting coffee was serious business, after all.

The windows in the conference room were covered with Venetian blinds, creating a game of light and shadow, giving it an air of mystery and melancholy. However, the moment you entered, your diamond brooch cast little sparkles of warm pink all over the walls.

You were carrying the bags with gifts and also balancing your coffee cup. It was honestly a miracle you did not spill everything yet. You set it all on the large table and for a moment you almost seemed to have forgotten the two animatronics even existed as you were fiddling with the little treats you had received.

“These chocolates are my favourite. It is a shame you two can't eat, you are missing pure heaven. Now, what exactly did you two want to talk about?“

Sun was very straightforward and went right down to business.

“You cheated, lied and manipulated facts today.“

“Me? I can only aspire to be that productive in one single afternoon.“

“Furthermore, you shamelessly tried to avoid the consequences of losing our little bet.“

“Tell me something: are you more upset about the case or the bet? It seems to me as if the latter is tormenting you more than the former.“

“I am not answering that.“

“If you wanted a date, all you had to do was ask like a sensible man, we don't need these convoluted schemes for something that simple.“

“Would you, then?“

“No.“

“See, this is why we need the schemes.“

“Such a tragedy your problems are, Sun.“

You opened another box of chocolates and you were wondering whether to try the one with dark ganache filling or the one with hazelnut cream. You were rudely interrupted when Moon lifted your chin up to look at him.

“You are no longer going to prance around acting as if the justice system is your own personal circus. If we expose what you did today, you will be kicked out of the Lawyers' Association and you will lose your license to practice.“

“That sounds so depressing when you put it that way.“

“I personally can appreciate what you were trying to do for all those people in the past year or so, but enough is enough. We could have offered you a plea bargain, had you only asked us. We are more than happy to settle if those puppies of yours mean that much to you, but they will need to serve time, whether you like it or not.“

“When they get in the system, it's over, it will haunt them and follow them for the rest of their lives, from getting employment all the way to daily life and relationships.“

“None of that is your concern, Y/N. You cannot save everyone.“

“With all due respect, Moon, you have no right to tell me what to do. I do not hate you, but I will not tolerate you being in my way either. Do not be fooled by my kind nature, you have no idea who you are playing with. Dreams can become Nightmares fairly quickly.“

“I am saying all of this because I do not want you to share the same unfortunate fate that keeps repeating itself in your family. Always best friends with the wrong lot. You need to stop fraternizing with criminals, for your own good.“

Moon expected a specific reaction from you with that statement, foolishly assuming that he would hit the right spot, that he would cause fear, pain, uncertainty and a need to run somewhere for some emotional safety. Even Sun knew that he had gone too far with that topic.

You were not having it. Yes, you were a regal and delicate flower. However, that flower was also poisonous and with plenty of thorns. You huffed at him.

“Oh, so we are playing that card now? While we are on the subject of family tradition and dubious practices, I am well aware of the person that gets rid of the truly bad people. Did he ever come for any of my current and recent clients? No. Therefore I don't see why you are so determined to lecture me about helping those that only do crime out of necessity, not evil. If anything, this is just petty revenge because you hate losing and because you are a manipulative jerk with no empathy for the misfortunate, Moon. If you wish to punish someone, start with yourself.“

That certainly did hit a nerve.

Moon went over to the window, pulling the blinds shut and letting the room bathe in darkness, the pink light disappearing. You blinked to adjust your eyes.

“Is this really necessary?

Moon's voice was unusually low, almost a whisper:

"Is darkness not a familiar thing to you, little devil fairy? You certainly seem to linger in the shadows, refusing to see the light, you are blind and unable to grasp reality as it is."

You sighed and shrugged.

"That is still better than believing in blind justice. Also, at least I got the comfort of knowing that Sun over here cannot see anything right now, either.“

The daylight animatronic made a huff at your words.

“I still know the basic layout of the room, thank you very much.“

Sun then leaned over to you and whispered:

“Now, why did you have to tell him all that? He is very touchy on that subject.“

“Well, he started it.“

“And you had to continue it?“

“Yes. I too am allowed to be petty.“

Moon's crimson optics were the only light left and they were getting closer, wicked and menacing. Their glow suddenly disappeared and all that was heard was Moon's malicious cackling. Even with Sun present, you knew you were pretty much screwed and that it was best if you made your merry way in the opposite direction.

An interesting chain of events followed that led to even more interesting consequences. You reached for the nearby bag that had the giant bunny plushie in it, throwing it in the general direction of Moon's laughter, hoping that it would hit him and buy you enough time to run out of the room. However, you miscalculated while waving your hand, accidentally hitting Sun in the face instead. In your defense, you could barely see a damn thing in the dark.

As this happened, Sun stepped backwards out of sheer instinct, bumping right into Moon as he was trying to elegantly sneak up. This caused Moon to lose balance and fall on the floor. As he tried to catch onto the table to pull himself back up, his hand landed directly on the coffee cup and the whole contents spilled over the edge right onto him, ruining his coat, vest and shirt.

Needless to say how much noise you three idiots had made in the process.

You reached for another bag, and you began to swing it around without a care in the world.

“Stay back, both of you, I am armed with plushies and I am not afraid to use them.“

Sun's face kept being caught in the collateral damage, of course. With a swift motion, he managed to catch you and pick you up, placing you on the table and pinning your wrists to it to stop you from further attacking him with such a deadly weapon. Meanwhile, Moon was removing his coffee-stained coat and vest, lamenting how the whole fabric was ruined now.

“This is not how I envisioned this meeting to transpire.“

The whole scene was then interrupted when a clerk opened the door, seeing the two celestial animatronics looming over you while you were lying on the table, Sun holding your wrists and Moon having half his clothes off.

The man blinked a few times, before clapping in joy.

“Oh, my god, finally. I have been placing my bets on the three of you for months. I have to tell the others that they owe me money. They said you three would get together by December, but I was a visionary and I said somewhere in Fall. Ah, passion! Such a fantastic thing. Have fun, you crazy lovebirds, you! I'll tell the group of people that is standing right outside not to disturb you for the next few hours, okay? Okay, take care.“

He closed the door and left, leaving the room in darkness again. A few moments passed and you burst out laughing, unable to control yourself. The situation was absurd and you were starting to love every minute of it.

“I must say, this madness is better than some boring date. We should do it again sometime.“

AO3 Link

[octuscle]

Cursed Ken, part 1: Kemal, the janitor

There was a lot at stake for Patrick. Actually, it was about everything. He had invested an incredible amount of time and money in preparing for this appointment. He had to be successful. And he would be successful. His idea was brilliant. His preparation was excellent. He took a deep breath. The projector projected the image of a young athletic man onto the wall. The young man was obviously a janitor or something. The young man was made of plastic. And a small army of young athletic men made of plastic, one of whom was currently having an image projected onto the wall, stood on the table in front of Patrick.

"Gentlemen, the Barbie movie gives your product a tailwind that will open up completely new markets. Barbie and Ken have become socially acceptable. And I'm convinced that this offers unimagined opportunities for marketing Ken in particular"

It seems to be going well. The Head of Product Management reached for the janitor. And turned it in his hand.

"Whereas in the past, gay men never dared to buy a Ken doll without lying about it being for their little niece, today hundreds of thousands of customers with purchasing power can imagine having a Ken doll on the shelf in their bedroom. But these customers also need Kens that serve stereotypes other than the Malibu boy."

A young man, who looked a bit like Malibu Ken himself, smiled as he reached for the doll, which was dressed like a British redneck. Only in pink. It went really well!

"As well as new Kens, which cover current popular gay fetishes, we should also take into account the fact that Barbie is now a manager or a lawyer. So Ken should also be allowed to be a janitor or a garbage man. Especially as this also appeals to potential customers' fetishes."

A member of the controlling department took the figure of the soccer player in his hand. Patrick seized the opportunity immediately. He switched to the foil with the Germanic-looking Ken, who was wearing a sleeveless T-shirt and had tattoos on one arm and one leg.

"With the European Football Championship in Germany this year, we have a major event that we can also exploit without paying license fees. We can place footballers, soccer fans and, as the epitome of masculinity, soccer hooligans. Everything that has to do with soccer this year…".

The head of product management cleared his throat. "May I interrupt for a moment?" he asked. Patrick nodded at him with a winning smile. "If you want my opinion, pack up your gay shit right now and leave the building. I didn't want this movie and I hate it. And the reason is that I feared excesses like this. I don't want a Ken who dresses like a faggot or a right-wing hooligan. For fuck's sake, does the prototype bodybuilder actually have steroid acne on his shoulders? Nobody wants to see that. And I certainly don't want to see it. Thank you for your efforts. But please leave. Go quickly and go far!"

Patrick stood open-mouthed in front of the screen with his presentation for a few seconds. Then he packed up without a word. He stuffed his artistically created dolls into a bag, put the computer in his laptop bag and left the room. He was on the verge of tears. He stuffed the bag with the dolls into the nearest garbage can. And then he left the building. Let Ken and Barbie choke you to death. Let them die of their fantasies. Anyone who even looked at Ken should become his fucking brainless image. How could he have thought he could make his fortune with these fucking figures? Never again!

There was an awkward silence in the meeting room. Not everyone present shared their boss's opinion. But no one dared to disagree. The two lucky ones who had a figurine in their hands discreetly slipped it into their jacket pocket. The head of product management took the janitor's Ken, stood up and said that he wanted to discuss this perversity with the legal department tomorrow.

It was mid-June. It didn't get dark until very late. Maybe that's why he hadn't even noticed how late it was. It was definitely time to call it a day. Where had that damn doll gone? He had it here on his desk… It was just too late, he was tired. But before he left, he had to go to the toilet. Damn it, he had to add toilet paper. And empty the garbage can. The snobs who were allowed to use the boardroom toilet often behaved like the ultimate barbarians. But it felt good to piss here. He would never get the privilege of doing it officially. But at this time of day? Who was going to forbid him?

The cleaning crew wouldn't be here for a few hours. He wiped over the urinals and washbasins with a few used paper towels. It was time to call it a day. But on the way out he could empty a few of the garbage cans along the way. Normally, he didn't pay attention to the contents of the garbage cans. Mostly boring papers. He assumed that the important stuff went into the shredding containers. There was something in one of the garbage cans on the conference floor that didn't belong there. Dolls. Various dolls that looked like Ken. In cool clothes. He'd never seen them like that before. Who threw something like that away? He packed it up once. It couldn't do any harm. Maybe he could sell the dolls…

Yes, he didn't have much to do with the blond Ken who stuck his mop in a pink cleaning bucket. But Kemal had even less to do with the powerful head of product management. He didn't want to deal with that kind of shit. He was here to service the air conditioning, replace light bulbs and sometimes fix faults in the elevator. It was a shitty job. But someone had to do it.

[parad-ice-lostandfound]

Prompt:

Pairing: OM!Brothers and GN!MC

Genre: NA

TW: NA

“I’m telling ya, I didn’t steal it!”

“Then where is it Mammon?!”

“How would I know?!”

You sighed, massaging your forehead as an unfortunate witness to the argument. Levi and Mammon squabbling wasn’t a rare sight in the House of Lamentation; it was a regular enough occurrence that Lucifer merely sighed and ignored it as long as it didn’t turn physical. However, the reason for this particular fight was something new. Something that didn’t have to do with Levi’s loaned money or Mammon’s schemes. The reason why the second-born and third-born were yelling at each other had to do with you; specifically, a ring you had lost a few hours back.

It was an heirloom that you had inherited, a present from your guardian on your eighteenth birthday. It was to symbolize your coming of age, they had said with tears in their eyes. Apparently, it had been in the family for centuries, and your guardian had made you swear that you would take care of it like your ancestors had before. But when you live a crazy, hectic life like yours, things are bound to get misplaced every once in a while.

You never really wore the ring unless it was a special occasion, but you were feeling particularly homesick today. So you had removed it from its box, intending to wear it for some time before keeping it back. As silly as it may sound, the ring soothed your longing for the Human Realm whenever it got too bad.

“I swear I didn’t take it!” Mammon’s tone of indignation brought your attention back to the present. Realizing that you needed to stop the two of them before Levi summoned Lotan or something, you stood. One movement from you was enough for both the demons to fall silent, two pairs of eyes watching you carefully. Clearing your throat, you smiled at the two. “Let’s not fight anymore, alright? I’m sure Mammon’s not lying. It should be in the house, so let’s start searching for it. We shouldn’t be wasting our time like this,” you reasoned, earning a huff from both parties.

And so started the search for the ring. You had given them a brief description of how it looked since neither of them had seen you wear it before. Soon the rest of the brothers were roped in to search for it as well, each one turning a section of the HOL upside down in search of the piece of jewellery.

Your hand brushed against something cold and metal as it dived between sofa cushions. Hope flared in your chest as you felt around to grab and pull it out.

You smiled at the lost ring which now sat in the palm of your hand. “I found it!” your voice rang out, bringing your beloved demons to where you were to get a glimpse.

None expected to see the ring they’d gifted to Lilith aeons ago.

Lucifer

Out of everyone, Lucifer is the most surprised. He stands still while his brothers show varying levels of disbelief and confusion. It’s only after his brain has realized that yes, it is indeed Lilith’s ring, and is reminded that he still needs to ask you where you got it from that he finally tells the others to shut up.

Listens attentively as you explain that it was a family heirloom. His eyes never leave you, and it’s honestly kinda unnerving how he doesn’t even blink while you speak.

Recollects how it was given to Lilith when she got her second pair of wings. Actually, didn’t Belphie and Beel have rings that matched with this one-?

Has a fond smile on his face when Belphie brings their rings and everyone sits down to admire the jewellery and talk about good times in the Celestial Realm.

Mammon

Mammon sucks in a breath when he sees the ring in your palm, the light glinting off the metal. Platinum, his mind supplies, as memories of him going through different kinds of metals to get the best one surface. Doesn’t even realize when his eyes fill with tears as he is reminded of his late sister.

Apart from a small gasp, Mammon doesn’t really make a sound for the first few minutes. Once he’s had enough time to reminisce, he starts firing the questions. Where did you get it? Why didn’t you tell him about it? Did you know it belonged to Lilith?

Mammon immediately recognizes the ring because not only had he selected the metal, he had also designed it with Asmo and Levi’s help. He remembered making two more, one for Beel and one for Belphie.

Sits down beside you, asking before taking the ring and examining it. Once he’s made sure that it was taken care of and cherished, he gives it back to you, uncharacteristically quiet as he leans against you while his youngest brothers get their own rings and everyone sits down to talk about the good old days.

Leviathan

Leviathan isn’t sure at first that it is the same ring that was gifted to Lilith. But after looking at Mammon and Lucifer’s reactions, he is convinced. He would relate this to an anime, but he’s just busy thinking about those days, back when his sister was alive and he was a general of the Celestial Realm.

A familiar feeling takes hold of him. He has lost so much; his position, his sister, his grace.

So why do you get to have something to remember her by? Lilith was his sister. He should have the ring, or at least one of his brothers. After all, he helped with making it…

Levi slowly removes himself from the scene, choosing to go back to his room to sulk at the unfairness of the situation. It’s only after he’s thought things through and realized that he’s not only hurting you but also disrespecting Lilith’s memory by acting this way that he leaves his room. He finds you and apologizes for his behaviour, but doesn’t tell you what exactly had gotten him into a bad mood before.

Satan

Satan has a vague knowledge of who the ring used to belong to. Lucifer’s shared memories tell him that much. However, he is intrigued as to how you got hold of it.

Doesn’t really hound you with questions, but instead listens to explain how it was a family heirloom and you had no idea that it had once belonged to Lilith.

Feels kinda out of place, since the rest of the brothers start talking about the Celestial Realm and debates whether to go back to his reading, before feeling your hand on his. He looks up to see you smiling at him, almost as if to make sure he knows that just because he was formed after the Fall, that doesn’t make him any less a part of the family.

Stays for your sake, listening to his brothers talk about how and why they made the rings.

Asmodeus

Asmo’s first reaction to seeing the ring is “Ooh, pretty ring. This reminds me of one we made… for Lilith..”

Once he finds out that it’s the same ring, he takes it from you and inspects it carefully. No, he’s not implying that you didn’t take good care of it MC, he just wants to see it’s in good shape.

Honestly proud of his work. Yeah, yeah, Levi and Mammon helped as well, but he did design the thing you know? And it lasted for so long, that means his craftsmanship was impeccable.

Gets excited when Belphie and Beel bring their rings and regales you with tales from their time in the Celestial Realm.

Beelzebub and Belphegor

Beel and Belphie instantaneously recognise the ring in your hand. After all, they had the matching set stashed away safely in their room.

Both have very similar reactions to seeing the ring. The twins both feel a bit of regret and guilt, but that’s chased away as soon as it comes. Asmo’s enthusiastic suggestion to get the other two rings helps with that, and Belphie surprisingly volunteers to go bring them.

Belphie, being the little shit he is, remarks that now the three of you can match as he hands Beel his ring and wears his own. You wear the ring to humour him, and that starts a playful argument between the remaining brothers.

While the others are distracted, Beel asks you and Belphie to hand him the rings. You do so, and the sixth born shows you something you hadn’t noticed before. Engraved, on the inside of each ring, is a phrase. Beel’s says ‘The sun’, Belphie’s says 'The moon’, and yours says, 'The stars’.

[cuddlecow]

Hiiii! I've got kinda a weird request. How do you think Franco would react to the reader asking if they can use his pacifier. I'm wondering if he would be protective of it or something. Sorry if that's too weird or anything 😅

Oh my gosh, nono, this isn't weird at all! I get curious about this too, especially if reader is sensory, has a fixation, or does it as a nervous habit! I feel like this is another one where it could have it's own story or slightly NSFW themes. I hope I did okay on this one! My brain was running 90 miles per hour while I was thinking about this, so I'm sure I didn't write it too well.

Reader Asks Franco Barbi To Use His Pacifier

At first, I feel like he would be super cautious and protective of his paci. He's scared that once you get up close to it that you might yank it off or cut it away from his bandolier and throw it away.

Even though he's paranoid about that, I feel like he would let you at least put it in your mouth for a few minutes.

If he sees that it seems to soothe you, he'll let you have it for a little longer than he originally would've.

He thinks getting you one of your own pacifiers would be a cute little present for you. He might even hand decorate it with stuff he finds lying around!

If you seem to float off into a different headspace, I feel like he'd be absolutely clueless on what to do, so he'd probably just stare at you or go do something else for a while.

BONUS:

Cleaning. That's all you seemed to do during the day when Franco was out running his trials. You kept his room tidy and sanitized. You were pretty much Franco's handler at this point by proxy. This particular evening when the Barbi had come back to his room, he was actually in a decent mood. You, however, were going around his room organizing, then putting everything out of order, then re-organizing it.

For some reason, today was a stressful day. Easterman and the other Murkoff staff were harping on you earlier in the morning for no apparent reason. You were now in your compulsive cycle, until someone in particular softly swung the door open.

"Baby's baaaack!" Franco said in a sing-song voice before he trailed off a little. You had just finished the 4th round of taking everything down and then re-organizing. You walked over silently, taking a breath to regulate yourself. You had seen Franco do it before when he was stressed, but you wanted to try it for yourself.

"Love, I've got a really.. odd question to ask you." You asked, turning your head away slightly. Franco looked at you, thinking your behavior was extremely off from normal. "Whad'dya want, Sugar?" He put some of his stuff down on the main table that you guys always sat at. You just stood there silently, your face heating up with embarrassment. The silence kept getting thicker, and his big blue eyes kept staring you down.

Nervously, you pointed your little t-rex arm towards his pacifier that was dangling from his bandolier. Franco looked at you, grimacing slightly. Hesitantly, he spoke, "Yeah, sure.. Just be gentle with 'er, will ya?"

He untangled it from his bandolier as you anxiously waited. Once he got it free, he handed it over to you carefully. You took it, putting the cord around your neck before resting it in your mouth. You gently bit on it, gnawing on it shortly after. Franco had gone around a corner of his large room. He thought about it, realizing that since he usually sucks on the pacifier, and now you were, that you had indirectly kissed him.

He peeked around the corner after about 7 minutes, seeing that you had passed out on the couch with the pacifier in your mouth. He waddled over to you, crawling atop your form splayed across the large sofa. He thought you looked rather sweet like this, so gorgeous with your chest rising with every inhale and softly coming down with each exhale. He wiggled the pacifier free from your maw, giving you a quick peck on the lips before he sucked on the paci himself, leaving the cord around your neck.

[peonierose]

Losing Game (4/4)

Book: Open Heart

Pairing: Bryce Lahela (M!MC) x Luna Auclair (F!OC)

Rating: Mature / Angst

TW: Mental Health

Word: 5,000+

Summary: Bryce and Luna have worked things out. But there is still one visit to make before Bryce and Luna find closure.

A/N: This has been a story that’s very dear to me. I went a bit off-canon so I hope you’ll give it a try. As always thank you to everyone who gives my stories and my characters a chance 🩷🌙

A/N 2: In case you missed the parts before here they are: Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3

A/N 3: Thank you to @annieruok94 🌷🩷 and @aallotarenunelma 🌺🩷 I hope you like the part with Adam, it was inspired by you 🥰

Side note: I also made a playlist for Part 4, (the previous two parts include a playlist as well).

The next day…

Bryce

I traded my shift with Aubrey so that I could have the day off.

I was watching Luna get dressed in a pink overall with a white shirt underneath, while I was lying in bed.

Luna turned towards me as she put her hair in a bun, a few blonde strands escaping her bun. She turned to me as I was basking in her light.

”I was thinking of visiting your dad today and I’d like to come with you if you want me to and if you feel ready for us to go together.“

I raised my eyebrows as I propped myself up against the pillow resting behind me.

”Are you sure? It’s not too much for you?“ I asked while I got out of bed.

She hugged me.

”Yes, I’m sure. Also, I love hugging you like this.“

”Any particular reason why?“ I grinned.

”This fine piece of ass. I like it.“

”Well this fine piece of ass made you feel real special last night. Also, I like this dirty side of you Lunes.“

I started to unbutton the straps of her overall but she stopped me.

”B we can’t. We’ll be late. The visiting hours aren’t that long.“

I sighed. She smiled and kissed me on my still-smiling lips.

”Really?“ I asked and tried to convince her for a quick round.

”Puppy dog eyes won’t work. Come on get dressed babe.“ She slapped my ass. I laughed out loud and got dressed.

And together we drove to prison to visit my dad.

Bryce

It’s weird to be here at the Halawa Correctional Facility, again.

The guards searched us, then gave us visitor passes and let us through. We sat at a dark grey table in the cafeteria, only one other guy was sitting down with his family from the looks of it.

I don’t think I’ve noticed anything that day. Not the color of the table or if anyone else was present. It might even be the same table I sat at the other day.

My dad walked in and they released the handcuffs and let him sit with us.

Both Lunes and I sat there as my dad walked over and sat down opposite us. He looked at me and smiled.

Then he turned to Luna and he offered his hand. Luna shook it and held onto it for a couple of seconds.

”You must be Mr. Lahela. I’ve heard so many things about you.“

I winced and tried to hide the fact that I hadn’t told Luna much. An acidic feeling rose inside of me. Recognizing it as guilt. For not telling her more about my messed up family life sooner.

But maybe I could change that and tell her everything later. I trust Luna, more than anyone. Maybe it’s time to lay all the cards on the table. Talking to Luna about my family might relieve some of the residual pain I’ve been carrying around for years.

”You must be Luna.“ My dad said and smiled at her. Luna nodded and I tuned back into the conversation.

”So Bryce has told you a lot of things about me? Like that pink is my favorite color?“ He joked but Luna didn’t know that my dad's favorite color is blue. Like mine. Well, blue-green is my favorite. I wonder why? I snicker.

”No way! I once told Bryce how good he’d look in pink scrubs. Like a deep magenta or a mauve tone. He’d be a stunner.“

My dad grinned at Luna’s enthusiasm. I haven’t seen him smile like that in a long time. Looks as if Luna can win anyone over.

”Or cherry red like that hickey.“ My dad pointed to me. I blushed down to my hair roots. Luna held out her hand for a high five and my dad smacked it.

”Hell yeah.“ Luna grinned, not embarrassed at all.

”Oh, man.“ I mumbled. She smacked me onto my arm.

”Ow that hurt.“ I rubbed the spot she smacked me.

”Man up.“ She grinned.

”Really? In front of my dad?“ I said and both Luna and my dad just laughed.

”Oh please. I’m sure your dad knows we’re sleeping together. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be pregnant.“

"Looks as if that train left the station a long time ago." My dad laughed out loud and started wiping tears from out of the corner of his eyes, Luna grins.

”I like her, she's got balls.“ My dad said.

”Dad!“ I exclaimed.

”Oh don’t worry. My delicate sensibilities weren’t hurt.“ Luna waved him off.

We kept chatting for the remainder of the visit. When it’s time to leave I help Luna when we both get up, my dad stands up as well.

”It was great meeting you Luna. I can tell you’re keeping my son on his toes.“

”Oh I sure do. Bryce is a great guy. I’m very proud of him.“ Luna said with a hint of a warning in her tone. My dad raised his eyebrows and got the message loud and clear. Then he smiled.

”She’s a keeper. Also, I’d love it if you called me Keola. Mr. feels too formal.“

Luna beamed at him.

”Sure no problem Keola. That would be nice. Would it be okay if I hugged you? You don’t have to, but I’d love a hug.“

My dad grinned and hugged her. God, what did I do to deserve someone like Luna? When they broke apart my dad waited.

”What are you waiting for? Get in here. Maybe before I become a grandfather?“

”Burn,“ Luna commented. I let out a surprised laugh and my dad and I hugged. It felt different to hug him now than it did when I was a teenager.

He felt more thin and frail. But it’s good to hug him because he’s my dad. And just like that something shifts into the right place. When we broke apart we picked up the conversation about the twins.

”We’re expecting twins in March.“ Luna said and my dad nodded happily. I can tell he’s happy. He’s got the same look in his eyes when Keiki was born.

”I have something for you.“ Luna got out a black and white picture. It’s the latest sonogram from the twins. She handed it to my dad.

”It’s an ultrasound picture of the twins. Kehlani Mae and Alaia Rose. You can keep it. We have another one.“ Luna said and my dad looked down at the picture. When he looked up, he held the picture close to his heart.

”Thank you, Luna. This means a lot to me.“ I smiled and hugged Lunes close to me. We all hugged again and then left to get to our car and drive home.

When we were inside the car I turned to Luna who looked at me. I smiled and reached into the glove compartment to get some tissues out and handed one to Luna.

”Here you go sunshine.“

She nodded in thanks and smiled at me.

”Thank you for today Lunes. I can’t even describe how much it meant to me that you went and visited my dad with me. Giving him that ultrasound picture? Making him smile like that? Man, I haven’t seen him smile as he did now in a long time. You made him so happy and me too.“

”Of course B. I’d give you one of my kidneys if it meant you’d survive.“

I smiled at her.

”B?“ She asked, looking tentatively at me.

”Yeah?“

”Can we just get some malasadas to go and then get naked?“

Which drew a surprised laugh from me. It’s like my dad said, Luna sure does keep me on my toes. But I love her, and it keeps me grounded in a way that’s hard to explain. That must be the feeling when you find the one.

”Not what I expected you to say. But sure.“

”I don’t want to ruin my overall, it's so cute.“ She said and together we drove to Leonard’s Bakery.

Bryce

We got home. Had some malasadas. And got lost in each other's touch. It was like coming home. It’s what we both needed.

We stand in our shower outside. Just holding on to each other. Like one of us is going to disappear in the next second. I felt the best when I was surrounded by water. It helped me calm down and it calmed Luna down too.

We toweled off and went into the kitchen. I stopped, putting some strands of her wet hair aside and I kissed her. Wondering how I got so lucky?

”You got so lucky because I’m awesome. And you’re my arm candy,“ she said, her tone getting lighter and I looked up at her. The shadows of pain were almost gone. I just kept looking at her.

”I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you with my actions,“ I said.

She pulled me closer.

”It’s okay B I know you didn’t mean it. And I know a relationship and love are sometimes hard to navigate. But another stunt like that and I won’t be so nice,“ she said.

”Why are you so forgiving? I thought you’d be angrier with me now?“

I asked, honestly flabbergasted.

She gnawed on her lips nervously. Ahhh. She’s been harboring a secret too.

”Spill Lunes,“ I said grinning. She looked up.

”Okay don’t be mad, but Evie sent out invitations for our wedding a couple of weeks ago and I said I’d have to ask if you wanted your mom to be there but I forgot to ask you and now your mom has gotten an invitation and I sort of didn’t ask you?“ She looked crestfallen so I pulled her close and planted a chaste kiss on her forehead.

”You were totally buttering me up. I was thinking of inviting her. Maybe even thinking of giving her and Dad a second chance. Unless they give me a reason to not trust them anymore,“ I said my voice steely.

She smiled and I knew we were good. When she kept smiling I looked at her.

”What? Any more secrets you’d like to tell me? Like how you ate the last piece of strawberry cheesecake that had my name on it?“

”That was Keiki,“ she lied and I shook my head.

We heard the door being slammed and Keiki walked in.

”You said it’s okay if we shared that piece of cake! Now I get blamed for eating the whole thing? Oh come on.“

She went into her room upstairs and slammed the door behind her. Bryce and I burst out laughing. Luna wiggled her eyebrows.

”How about we try out that hot tub we got some time ago?“

I grinned at her getting where she was going with this.

”Getting you naked is my favorite pastime,“ I said.

”Likewise,“ she replied.

We both sprinted into one of our bathrooms where we set up a hot tub. Luna's idea. The best idea she’s ever had if you don’t count on us getting together.

I got put out of my thoughts when she stood naked in front of me.

She’s been feeling unsure of her body because it started changing ever since she got pregnant.

”You‘re the most stunning woman of all time. So get that sweet butt of yours into the water,“ I said and she grinned.

”You only love me for my body,“ she grinned, getting comfortable in the water.

I huffed out a breath.

”That’s supposed to be my line,“ I said and she got closer until our bodies touched.

”Maybe you can change my mind?“ she asked.

”Oh I intend to,“ I said and kissed her until she forgot everything.

Until there’s just us and the love we shared for each other.

After a while when our fingers looked more like raisins, we got out of the hot tub. We dried ourselves and went to our bedroom. Lunes took one of my college shirts from Stanford and I just wore boxers. I turned Luna’s night light on. Illuminating the whole room, transforming it into the night sky.

When we lay in bed we almost stuck together. That’s how close we were. Needing this moment. Together. It’s what’s anchoring us.

I leaned into Lunes and sought her warmth, her comfort and she did the same for me.

Everything’s going to work out in the end, because our love is the loudest.

The next morning…

We got up, showered and lay in bed. Or well Luna was lying in bed while I was putting on some bum bum cream since she can’t reach it herself. I could feel her stare bore into me, making me smile.

”What now? Pillow talk?“ I teased and looked up at her.

”I…just wanted to ask if you’d tell me more about your parents. And what happened?“ Luna said.

I know she won’t push me, but she’d love to know more. I sigh as I put the lid back on the bum bum cream and kiss her calf. Making her laugh. One of my favorite sounds in the whole world.

”When I was younger…I don’t know, I always remember we had a lot of money. I never cared about that stuff. My parents were working in the real estate field. I wasn’t different because of it. And I didn’t act as if I was the center of attention, throwing money around.“ I sat at the edge of the bed and gathered my thoughts.

”Then there was this one night. I remember it was late and I just came back from a round of basketball with Kainalu and some of my other friends. I drove around the corner into our neighborhood in Maui and saw all these blue lights. Realizing the light was coming from police cars. Not having the faintest idea what the hell was going on.“

”Then what happened?“ Luna reached out and I helped her sit next to me.

”I saw my dad getting arrested, being put into a police car. I went inside the house like I was on autopilot. My mom came to me pulled me to the side and whispered I should take this bag from Keiki’s closet since apparently they haven’t checked that out yet. Take Keiki and get out of the house.“

”That must’ve been terrifying. I can’t imagine how you must’ve felt.“ Luna said drawing circles on my hands.

”It was horrible. I felt like I was trapped in a nightmare. Not able to wake up.“

”What happened with your parents?“

”Later I found out how we got to have all this money. It didn’t just appear out of thin air. I learned my parents made some bad investments and the people they owed money wanted their money back. Saying ”pay me back or else.“ I said remembering the court transcripts.

Luna puts a hand over her mouth.

”Oh god. What happened after that?“

I rub a strand of her blonde hair between my fingers.

”As it turns out my parents skimmed money off their clients. They had access to all the clients' private information. At first, nobody noticed anything, since it was only small amounts that disappeared and that could’ve been easily justified. But when larger sums started disappearing, they started an investigation, to find out what happened. My parents became desperate to pay the money back that they owed. But what they didn’t know was that the police set a trap and caught them red-handed.“ I sigh, sharing this part of my life was always hard for me.

As if feeling this was difficult for me, Luna turned my head towards her and smiled at me.

”You don’t have to tell me. I can see this is affecting you deeply.“

I shook my head and lightly kissed her temple.

”So if your parents got caught what happened to you and your sister? I can’t imagine you came out of this unscathed.“ She encouraged me to keep talking.

”I was finishing my last year of high school. I was one of the popular kids and became public enemy number one overnight. The other kids whose parents had lost money from my parents' schemes took their anger and frustrations out on me. It’s hardly surprising, but still, I wasn’t a part of it. Neither was Keiki. She was only what, 6-years-old? And that night my parents got arrested? It was Keiki‘s birthday. I felt so angry that they would be greedy and take some money and drag all of us into it. But I know now that maybe there’s more to the story and life isn’t always as black and white as we’d like it to be.“

Luna leaned into me to offer me some comfort, as I was telling her my deepest and darkest secret. One I’m still ashamed about, though I’m trying to make my peace with it.

”We stayed with close friends until everything was cleared. Mom was acquitted because she testified against my dad.“

”Your parents love each other B. She wanted to help him and he didn’t want her to be in prison. I’d do the same. If I could help you by not making you wear an orange jumpsuit? I’d take it.“

”You’d lie on the stand?“ I was shocked.

”Depending on what the lie would be. I’m not exactly good at lying.“ She replied. I smiled and nodded absently as if now realizing she could be right.

”You may be right.“ I said.

”What happened after?“ Luna asked.

”It didn’t get better once I started college. I asked if I could take online classes. The college board agreed because my situation was a bit delicate as they put it. But it became too much so I transferred to Stanford. Just to get out of Maui. My grades were good enough that I could justify a transfer. And they had an open spot, so I packed my stuff, and left. Keiki went to live with Mom in Maui, while I went away to Stanford. Keiki was only six and in elementary school when I left. I left everything behind and didn’t look back.“

I sighed as I was saying that.

”Do you feel guilty that you left? I mean you and Keiki made up. Do you think she still harbors hard feelings because you left?“ Luna nailed my emotional roller coaster inside of me on the head.

”I do feel a little guilty. But I hope she forgave me. I regret not being here for her. But then I wouldn’t have met such awesome friends and later on you, Lunes.“

”The love of your life. Just give this a bit of time and you’ll see things will turn around.“ She grinned and I kissed her. Simply because it made me happy.

I broke off the kiss and said into her hair.

”The love of my life has a good point.“

She grinned and I smiled against her temple and instead of talking about the past, we made memories for the future.

A week later…

I was nervous as all get out. I was never good at talking to other people about my feelings.

I knocked on a red door and when the door opened a tall man with blond hair, put in a bun, answered the door.

Adam smiled at me as I stood there like a weirdo. I smiled nervously. Waving at him. Why am I waving at him? Get a grip, Bryce! I let out a nervous breath I’d been holding in and smiled at Adam.

”Bryce. It’s good to see you man. What brings you by? Oh god, my mom would whoop my ass. Seriously, where are my manners? Come on in.“ He opened the door wider and his golden retriever Knox came closer.

”Knox. Sit. Remember, no jumping people.“ Adam said to his dog who just smiled. I didn’t know dogs could smile. Huh. You learn something new every day. I petted Knox, which earned me a lick on my hand.

I followed Adam into the kitchen and sat down on one of the chairs.

”Want something to drink? My cousin made some beer. It’s made from some native ingredients found only in Hawaii. He listed tons of those ingredients. To me, it just tastes like beer. You want some?“ His head was buried inside the fridge.

”Sounds good.“ I replied.

He resurfaced from the fridge and held out a bottle of beer. It shone like liquid gold. We both opened our bottles took a sip and whistled.

”Damn. This is some good shit.“ I said and took another sip. Tasting, honey, amber, citrus notes, and something unique. Like hibiscus? How did they incorporate that into beer?

Adam smiled.

”I’ll be sure to tell him.“ He smiled and put his beer on a nearby table.

”So what brings you by? I don’t assume this is a social call?“

”What, I can’t come visit you?“ I asked, trying to mask why I was there.

Because I feel embarrassed and ashamed for something I had no control of. But like Dr. Leslie said, letting go of the past doesn’t mean it won’t be able to hurt you anymore, it means you’re giving it less power over you.

”Look I’ll be honest. I came here to ask you for a favor. And you can say no.“ I said.

”What kind of favor?“ He regarded me carefully.

”I recently had some memories from the past come back and I realized I might need an outlet for my emotions to avoid having a panic attack during surgery.“ I told him.

”I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time. I am. I know how difficult it was when my mom died. I was angry at myself, at the world, at everyone.“ He admitted and I looked up.

”I‘m so sorry for your loss. I bet your mom was an incredible person.“ I said and peeled off the label of the beer bottle. Feeling the soft fur of Knox graze my calves. I reached and patted him and he lay down by my feet. Anchoring me in a way.

”She sure was. It took me some time to figure out how to handle my grief. And everyone handles grief and losing a loved one differently. So if there’s something I can do to help I’d be happy to.“ He said and smiled, his blue eyes sparkling.

”Can I ask what happened?“ He took another sip of his beer, turned his attention to me and asked me what I feared he might.

”My parents cheated a lot of people out of their money. And the kids at school got back at me and Keiki for it. My dad is still in prison and my mom testified against my dad so she didn’t go to jail. At that time my sister and I didn’t know what my parents did. I recently visited my dad and I don’t know. I guess I’m just not sure how to feel about this whole situation.“ That’s when I realized I'd been babbling and when I looked up I just wanted to run away. Or hide.

”First of all, I would never judge you, Bryce. I’ve got to know you over the last couple of months. You're a kind, supportive guy. Who’s hard-working and loves his family. You’re a good person. Don’t let past mistakes by other people define who you are at your core.“ He said and I breathed out. Before I could say anything he continued.

”And don’t worry whatever you tell me stays between us. You don’t have to worry that I’d spill the beans to anyone. I’m really sorry this happened to you. I never thought you’d gone through something like that. So what is it exactly I could help you with? I’m not exactly good with therapy sessions.“ He smiled gently.

”I worked something out for therapy. But…I…uh…I‘d love it if maybe I could work on some projects here with you. If you need any help. I know I’m not exactly qualified or anything. But maybe I could use your workshop in the beginning. I promise I won’t make a mess. Years of doing surgeries have made me a very organized person. At least in the OR room.“

Adam grinned.

”You got it. Use the space however you like. It’s yours. If I do need some help I’ll let you know. As a matter of fact, I could use your help. I found this dresser at an antique store and I’d love to restore it to its former glory. The wood carving is beautiful, I think it’s made out of Koa wood. It would be perfect for Maxine actually.“

He blushed and I smirked.

”So essentially two birds one stone?“ I asked and he nodded. That’s when I noticed how different he looked when Maxine’s name was mentioned. I wondered what I look like when I talk about Luna. Probably like a sappy fool. But probably a really happy one.

”You really love her do you?“ I asked and it dawned on me, how much his eyes conveyed his genuine love and respect for Maxine.

”Yes I do. Maxine is a special woman. Hopefully, I’ll be able to make her happy for the rest of my life.“

”I’ll drink to that. To love and good friendships.“ I said and we clinked our glasses together and just enjoyed a nice view of a Hawaiian sunset.

Life is hard but you make the best out of it every single day.

[thesupreme316]

Could I request a HOOK Valentine’s Day smut and or fic?

Partition (Hook x Fem!Reader):

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Suggestive (failed), Comedy (fail)

Summary: What happens when Hook forgets it's Valentine's Day and your anniversary?

Word Count: 1,585

Supreme Speaks: hehe, so this was supposed to be uploaded by Valentine's day (my bad). anywhoosies, thank you to @hookerforhook for the request, I hope you and everyone else enjoy it. also, it's my first time doing something suggestive (cause i don't write smut) but please lemme know if it's good. ALSO ALSO, i hope everyone is doing well and remember you are loved and appreciated.

Warnings: slightly proofread, failed suggestive and comedic content

Taglist (if you wanna be apart of it, lemme know): @hookerforhook @triscillal @hooks-martin @sheinthatfandom @diabloguapos @wwenhlimagines

“You seriously don’t know what day it is?” You looked into his eyes to see if he was lying or not.

“It’s Tuesday.”

You rolled your eyes, groaned, and stomped away from your boyfriend of three months, Tyler.

Tyler was, for lack of better words, stoic. Sometimes too stoic for your liking. To the world, he appeared cold and careless. However, within the three months (and even before) of your relationship, Tyler always showed affection and his softer side to you, whether people were around or not. He was able to remember little, almost unrecognizable, habits and details about you. Like how you chew with the right side of your mouth, when you get nervous that you tap your fingers against your neck, or how your favorite color is a particular shade and not the whole range of the color. He knew so much about you, yet, he couldn’t remember today’s date.

It was Valentine’s Day.

Not only was it Valentine’s Day….

It was your 3 month anniversary…And this dude forgot it.

To some, 3 months is not a major thing, but to you, every anniversary/celebration is important. Just like for other girls and or couples, today was special for you, or at least it was supposed to be. You just don’t know it wasn’t special enough to Tyler, who literally (not literally) kept hinting for you to go out with him 3 months ago.

Was it you? Maybe you didn’t push the occasion to him enough. Then again, he doesn’t like people repeating themselves or people pushing concepts on him. Maybe he wasn’t a Valentine’s Day kind of guy. Or maybe he has bad memories of Valentine’s Day. Whatever the reason, it didn’t excuse him from missing an important occasion.

Bitterly chuckling, you kept walking to your hotel room and kept trying to tell yourself that he probably has something planned. Opening the door, you saw the presents you got for your forgetful boyfriend sitting on your bed. That sight broke you, here you got him the things that he had his eyes on and you got nothing.

You quickly sat the presents on the table before flopping on your bed face first. Now you were completely over today. You were conflicted about the reason and it just dampen your mood. In the middle of your sulking, you didn’t notice the door opening for your roommate to walk in.

“Girl, I leave you for like 15 minutes and you’re already in distress.” Willow jokingly said. You, with slightly red eyes, look up to find Willow and Ruby. “Honey, what’s wrong?” Willow said, rubbing your back.

“Tyler forgot about today.” You quietly replied

“Honestly, maybe he just thinks you already know how much he loves you and thought he didn’t have to do anything,” Willow said shrugging

“It’s our three-month anniversary.”

“Oh, he’s a dumbass.” Ruby sat on the floor as Willow kicked her shin. “Ow, what? It’s probably true. Man eats chips on a daily.”

Willow rolled her eyes before saying, “I’m sure that he didn’t mean to forget. He probably has a lot on his plate with the title and going against The firm.”

You wiped your eyes, before slightly nodding. It was like you were trying to convince yourself more than the two women in your room. “You’re right. Hopefully, he has something planned for us, like a surprise or something. But let’s change the subject,” you started, “What are you guys doing today?”

Ruby, not looking up from her phone, scoffed, “Willow’s been trying to show me the so-called magic of Valentine’s Day. It’s not working.”

“She just hates seeing people happy.”


“No, I hate seeing corny couples happy. Y/N and Hook are not corny, so I wish them well.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at your friends’ complex and clashing viewpoint: Ruby hates the aesthetic of Valentine’s Day but wants to see you happy (and knows the basic components of relationships). Willow on the other wants to see everyone happy. You were happy to have friends like them, to give you multiple perspectives and pieces of advice. “Okay, well since you’re not doing anything, do you wanna have a Galentine’s Day? We can go to Build-A-Bear or something.”

As you were gonna answer, Ruby cut you off, “No! I hate kids!”

Willow shouted back, “You hate everyone!”

“Not you guys!”

Before you could break up the soon-to-be argument, there was a knock at the door. Ruby got up and opened the door to see Darius and Dante Martin standing there, who happens to be two of Tyler’s best friends.

“Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!” Dante said entering the room with his brother.

Darius’ eyes widened at the sight of you, “Why are you still here? Shouldn’t you be out already?”

Ruby rolled her eyes before saying, “No, your best friend doesn’t remember what today is.”

“Yeah, go ask your little friend,” Willow said while rubbing your back.

“No, Hook told us tha-“ Darius started before Dante covered his mouth. You raised an eyebrow as the brothers went to a corner and whispered to each other. It was never like Dante to cut his brother off. And it was never like them to keep a secret from you (especially when it concerns Tyler). Your eyes shifted between them as they started making their way toward the door. “Sorry! We’ll be sure to talk to him! Okay, you guys bye!” Darius quickly said as Dante pushed him out of the door.

Frustrated, you fell back on the bed and asked Willow and Ruby to leave you out of today’s plans. You just wanted to be alone with your thoughts. As Ruby dragged your roommate out, the only thing you could think about was Tyler: how you wished he was here, wishing that he remembered, and what you guys would do if he remembered. This entire time, you were trying to keep your hopes (hoping that he’ll pull through, especially when Dante and Darius showed up) but at this moment, you started to accept that today was going to be a regular day.

As you felt yourself drifting off to sleep, there was a knock at the door. Groaning, you opened the door but found no one at the door. But instead, two bags with a note attached. You picked them up before reading the note.

Sweetheart,

Of course, I wouldn’t forget about tonight. Put these on and get ready for a night you can’t forget.

Tyler

Your mood went from sad to happy in a matter of seconds. You squealed and immediately shut the door, dashing to the bathroom. In one bag was a beautiful black dress that you had your eye on for the past few weeks. In the other bag was a pair of shoes that were sold out for as long as you had them in your cart. Your smile grew larger, as you began to put on the dress. It was a perfect fit, hugging your body beautifully. Hook really knew you. You did your makeup (that complimented your eyes and skin tone) before quickly styling your hair.

As you were finishing up the final details of your look, there was a knock at the door. You ran to the door and opened it to reveal your boyfriend in a black tuxedo in all-white sneakers, holding two bouquets of roses (one in red and the other in your favorite color). Whether wearing a suit or not, Tyler would always refuse to wear dress shoes. You smiled up at him (even with heels, you were still shorter than him), “I actually thought you forgot.”

“I’m offended at the amount of faith you have in me,” Tyler said with a fake pout. He presented the flowers to you, pushing them in your hands. “I would never forget something so important, sweetheart.” He kissed you on the cheek before stepping inside the hotel room. You closed the door and put the flowers down as Tyler continued, “Look, I’m sorry that I made you upset. Dante and Darius came to me and told me how sad you were. I just needed more time to ensure everything was perfect tonight.”

Your eyes sparkled at the confession, “For me?”

Tyler smirked before stepping closer and giving you a sweet kiss, “You deserve it. Only the best.” He gave you another kiss. “Happy Valentine’s Day. Happy 3-month anniversary.”

“Is this the start of your apology?” You asked, raising an eyebrow with a small smirk

“I was hoping the dress and shoes were.”

You backed up and did a twirl, showing off your outfit. “I think so, you’re doing an okay job so far. I look amazing.”

Tyler nodded, “You look gorgeous, babe. But I think you would look better beneath me.” He grabbed your hips and pulled you closer, grazing your lips. “Don’t you?” He whispered.

“I agree with you, baby.” You hummed, wrapping your arms around his neck. “But I think, you should be on your knees and giving me that apology right now. Don’t you?” You sat down on the edge of the bed, looking up at him with a hint of lust and mischief in your eyes.

Slightly chuckling, Tyler leaned down to give you a long yet passion-filled kiss. He then descended onto the floor in front of you, on his knees. He lifted your right leg and kissed your ankle, “I couldn’t agree more, sweetheart.”

Let’s just say, you two didn’t make it to the reservations that Tyler made that night.

[woodchipp]

feeling salty today, so.

"the fact he didn't know she was poor"

Backstage's Aubrey does seem to imply the real Aubrey opened up to Sunny more than she did to the rest of her friends, though. I think we can reasonably infer she also opened up about her rough home life to him as part of that.

"Sunny's pretty observant, I think."

Sunny, being the awesome and observant friend he is, apparently did nothing of substance to help.

The game doesn't show him even trying to help. We don't get to see him... idk, maybe bringing Aubrey some decent food since the fridge in her house apparently contains mold. Despite Basil also describing Sunny as "a good listener", we don't get to see any flashbacks that'd have shown him listening to and supporting Aubrey.

The way OMORI's narrative seems to present it, Sunny being a "good listener" basically amounted to him being an equivalent of the rubber duck programmers explain their code to in their attempts to debug it. We get repeatedly told that he's supportive, but nothing of the sort is ever shown, which brings me to my next point

"Wonder if Sunny's subconsciously fulfilled her wants in Headspace to make up for seeing them never filled in the real world."

Even though I recognize that this statement is a fairly neutral one, I want to use it to address something else. I've seen people insisting that Sunny loves his friends and - somehow - using Headspace as evidence.

This sort of argument seems to stem from a particular problem with the game's writing - it often forgets that Sunny's imagination has no impact on reality. The secret post-credits cutscene is emblematic of this since you only obtain it by consistently watering Basil's plants in Headspace, which the game seems to equate to Sunny doing a nice thing for Basil in reality for some reason.

That brings me to my overall point - Sunny giving Aubrey everything she wishes for in Headspace doesn't matter at all. Sunny creating an ideal world for himself and his friends in his head is not indicative of his strong love for them.

Nothing Sunny does in his head matters.

What defines you are your actions, not your thoughts. The game can tell me Sunny loves his friends all it wants, but Sunny's actions (lying to his friends by omission, ruining Basil's photo album, leaving Basil himself alone during the latter's breakdown in the bathroom) simply don't match.

[veraynes-blog]

Missy/Twelve for the ask meme? 👀

Ooh okay. Haven't done much content for Twelve/Missy but I really like them as a pairing.

Who’s the cuddler?

They're both really awful at it, honestly. 😬 Twelve ultimately doesn't like to be touched, though I think he makes occasional exceptions when emotional needs can be met through touch. Missy doesn't have the same reservations, but she does have her pride, and he's rejected her often enough that lowering her guard would be difficult.

Who makes the bed?

Missy, when she can be bothered, and when she's decided she's performing femininity today. Sometimes she likes everything to look just so, and that means an elaborate overhaul of their living space.

Who wakes up first?

Missy. I imagine she has a slightly better sleep schedule than Simm, but would still get bored and restless lying down for very long.

Who has the weird taste in music?

I actually think they have pretty similar tastes. We know they both like classical, although Missy seems to lean towards piano music whereas Twelve likes the more powerful stuff. And they both have a weakness for catchy pop still, whether that's Hey Missy or Pretty Woman. Mostly the only disagreements are on whether Twelve's electric guitar cover of Beethoven's 5th constitutes 'music'.

Who is more protective?

Twelve, but in a weird way. He's not Ten, he's not lying to himself. He knows full well the Master is a terrible person, that they've committed atrocities, that they're dangerous to anyone around them. But also he's selfish, and he loves her, and he wouldn't let anyone (beyond himself) truly punish her for those crimes. We literally see it play out in canon, that he'd rather put her in a box to keep her safe and with him, as well as keep her isolated from everyone else.

Who sings in the shower?

Missy, again for the Master's love of music and self-expression.

Who cries during movies?

Missy does the whole performative dabbing of eyes where she thinks normal people would cry. Usually followed by some terribly inappropriate or cutting commentary on why that tragedy was pretty funny, actually.

Who spends the most while out shopping?

Missy. Just because someone decided they were only going to dress in secondhand hoodies and mismatched pants doesn't mean she gave up her standards, thank you very much.

Who kisses more roughly?

Again, I'm conscious of Twelve's aversion, or particular preferences, around touch. Don't get me wrong, I think they have a sexual relationship, but that there's some different physical boundaries in place. I don't think they kiss very much as part of that relationship, or if they do it's the more delicate, careful type of kissing we saw him share with her.

(That said, Missy took her opportunity when they first met, so I guess Missy!)

Who is more dominant?

Okay, in a purely sexual dynamic, of course Missy. Like, give her half an opportunity and she's got a crop in one hand, restraints in the other, and a head full of ideas on how exactly she's going to break his composure.

In their relationship? Twelve. I actually think Missy makes a very purposeful choice to present herself as more submissive in this regeneration, because for whatever reason she believes that will gain the Doctor's approval enough to repair their friendship. (Side note: by 'submissive' I definitely don't mean nice or calm or even non-threatening, just that she's willing to bend to his will.) Twelve, meanwhile, rises to the challenge and fully controls the narrative of their relationship. I don't know if he fully realises how much of that power she handed him, but he's not above using it.

My rating of the ship from 1-10.

"She was my mancrush" out of 10. ���

[sibyl-of-space]

It's almost midnight I spent literally my entire day working on ghost trick romhacking and I feel like I have Nothing to show for it. I fixed the approach issues from last time and spent So Many Hours painstakingly testing the chapter.xml.lz file and I am now 900% more knowledgeable about that file's structure than I was before, I know exactly which hex codes to edit to make it try to load a different stage than the one it's supposed to (in fact there are two different ways I can do this that have slightly different results and one of them sometimes causes crashes), but some things are breaking in ways that I simply cannot explain. And unfortunately everything that I did successfully learn has inevitably brought me to the conclusion: the data that I want is not here. I can change everything that there is in the code to change about a particular chapter, and it does not appear to impact how the progression for that chapter is loaded. It impacts everything else but that. I think that the progression data might just be pulled from a save file.

(on the plus side, I did SO much testing of the chapter file that I could probably publish a document on it, which I might do eventually. I spent literally an entire day on it so even though it's useless for my purposes I might as well put that out there.)

I am running out of places in this entire game's code for the data I'm looking for to be. Where the fuck is it. This shit is going to drive me insane.

I do think, however, that there is a good chance these last two Things may be considered part of the UI and not rendered at all like normal talk sprites despite looking the same. I have many reasons for thinking this.

- still present when the text files associated with them are removed (for all other talksprites in the game, the text and the sprite are defined at the same time in the same place)

- so far, basically none of the changes that I've made have impacted the overall game UI, so if this is a UI thing that would explain why I haven't found where it's modified yet

- one of the remaining sprites is animated which is not true for any other talksprite in the game so it's not hard to imagine that even though it looks like a talksprite, in terms of implementation it might look very different

- one thing I've been testing for the database and system files is replacing the English ones with French ones just to see what gets translated in the game when I do that. And I haven't found where the UI gets translated yet. This translates database entries and text bubbles but it does not translate the text on buttons, the menu categories, and such - if I can figure out what file translates those UI elements maybe I can figure out this final extremely infuriating piece of the puzzle I've been stuck on for so much longer than I have wanted to be.

There were at least four different things I tried today that I was like "this might legitimately solve the problem and if it does I'm going to be mad (because it's something I overlooked early on) but at least it'll be done"... and then none of those things panned out. I hate romhacking never let anyone tell you that it's a fun hobby they're lying

[theinnermeyoullneverknow]

[blackjackkent]

The guardian's voice speaks at the entrance to the cave.

"Come. We will talk in private. Just the two of us."

"I'm not leaving my companions behind."

"Suit yourself," the distant voice says. "But only the leader of your group is coming in. I will not allow anyone else."

Hector sighs, glances over his shoulder at the others. Lae'zel's bearing in particular is taut, like an attack dog ready to leap, but she scowls and gives him a sharp, curt nod.

"If it must be so, it must be so. Do not fail me. Do not fail us."

---

The air of the Astral Plane is cool and still. It feels like the air before a storm, anticipatory, waiting for an explosion.

The guardian stands with her back to him, looking out at the infinite sea of stars.

"I may have made a mistake trusting you," she says. Even facing away from him, her voice is powerful, seeming to come from everywhere at once. "I told you to stay away from the githyanki. But you just couldn't help yourself, could you?" She turns to face him, shoulders square, unblinking. "And now you've come here to murder me."

I've come here because I had no choice, Hector thinks wearily. I have come here because you haven't been open with me, and so I did not know what to believe. "Vlaakith told me you are an agent of the illithid Grand Design," he says neutrally, watching her expression closely.

She smiles ruefully. "I told you I stole the artifact from someone. Well - I stole it from Vlaakith. Since then, she has become desperate. Vlaakith wants me dead because I know her secret. It is a secret so great that if her people ever found out, that would be the end of her rule, the end of *her.*" The smile fades, her expression going tight and serious. "That same secret is how I've been protecting you from the Absolute."

Her eyes narrow slightly. "I can hear your thoughts. You think I'm lying. Vlaakith warned you that I would try to deceive you. But consider this - what reason have I to deceive you? I want the same thing as you - freedom. I'm on your side. I have been since the very beginning."

She pauses, watching Hector for a moment, then slowly draws her sword from where it rests in the sheathe on her back. Then she kneels, and presents it to him, bowing her head.

Hector stares at her. The import is plain - she is allowing him to kill her if he wishes, because she believes he will not.

And she's right, of course. If she can, indeed, see into his mind, surely she can see the turmoil that has taken root there. He does not want to kill her; secretive though she has been, he knows she's helped her. And after the zaith'isk, after the inquisitor - he does not believe the gith have his best interests in mind, or Lae'zel's either.

In this moment, as he stares at that sword, he realizes - even before he came in here, he knew he would not kill the guardian. He came here only hoping for enough information to convince Lae'zel not to do it herself.

"Get up," he mutters hoarsely. "You won't die today."

She relaxes, smiles slightly, draws the blade back into her grip and then sheathes it. "It seems I was right to put my faith in you after all," she says simply. "Thank you."

She pushes herself to her feet with a grunt, inclines her head to him. "Vlaakith will be furious - to make no mention of your githyanki companion. The lich queen fears nothing more than the loss of her empire. The knowledge I have of her deception will bring that about."

"What deception?" Hector snaps impatiently. He is taking her at her word, that they are on the same side, but still she talks in riddles, in circles, never quite coming to the point, never quite giving him the information he needs to act.

The guardian hesitates a moment before answering. Perhaps she is considering another roundabout evasion, but something in Hector's gaze must tell her that he is pushed to his limit at present. "Vlaakith is lying to the githyanki," she says bluntly. "They believe she knows how their beloved mother Gith defeated the mind flayer empire."

She shakes her head sharply. "But she does not. If the illithids would ever rise to power again, she would be incapable of stopping them. And if her people found out about her impotence, there would be mutiny, revolution, the end of her rule."

Hector grimaces. He has seen the brutality and destructive capacity of the githyanki culture. Turned in upon itself, it would be a bloodbath.

"But that very power," the guardian goes on, "the power to resist illithid control, which Vlaakith only pretends to know, is how I've been protecting you." She smiles bitterly. "I suppose she hoped to extract it from my corpse." A pause. "Since you spared me that fate, she will come for you."

Hector's jaw sets. He knows she's right - by not killing her, he has condemned himself to a battle against, potentially, all the soldiers of the creche. But if there's any chance he can convince Lae'zel... "What's the power?" he demands.

Again she hesitates...but this time shakes her head. "A logical question. But you're not ready for the answer."

He opens his mouth to object, to insist that she tell him something he can understand, something he can use - but she raises a hand, then puts it to his chest and pushes him backwards a few steps. "I have delayed long enough. The next attack is overdue, and I can't risk you being caught in the middle of it. I need you out there, searching for the Absolute. You were on the right path - to Moonrise Towers. Return to it."

Her eyes fix on his, and a flash of worry moves across her expression for the first time. "I hope you are ready to face Vlaakith's wrath. The entire creche stands ready to kill you in her name. Good luck."

---

The others are waiting where he left them outside the cave. Gale is examining their surroundings with a scholarly sort of interest and Karlach is fidgeting, pacing a small circle and kicking aside small pebbles to watch them bounce strangely in the gravity.

Lae'zel pounces as soon as he is within view.

"Speak!" she snaps. "Have you killed my queen's enemy?"

He comes to a halt a little ways from them, steadies himself, squares his shoulders. This is the moment of truth - either Lae'zel will hear him or she will not. He considers briefly, wildly, trying to convince her there was no one there, no one to talk to - but he knows she would not believe him, and anyway...he wants to tell her the truth, as he always does. It will be her choice what to do with it.

"Actually, I learned a few things." His voice is flat, steady, carefully controlled. "Your queen is lying to you."

As he expects, she lashes out at once - he is only surprised her sword remains sheathed. "Vlaakith does not lie to her faithful!" she bellows. "Open your mind - show me!"

Narrator: Your mind tingles. Lae'zel seeks entrance.

Open your mind. Let Lae'zel into your memories.

Narrator: Your thoughts become one. She sees the truth of your confrontation in an instant.

Lae'zel's head snaps back. Her eyes widen, then narrow to hard, angry slits. Whether the anger is directed at him or elsewhere...that he can't be sure.

"Vlaakith tavki na'zin. I see only - only madness. Vlaakith bears the full might of Tu'narath's arms, and the covenant of the great Mother Gith!" She barks the words out, each tumbling over the next, desperate to convince herself that what she is saying is true. He can see the fear rising in her, the cracks forming in her certainty.

She turns away from him sharply, stalks back down the path from which they came. "Tsk'va! We are leaving this place. NOW."

[macamadamia]

Crime & Punishment Chapter 2: Punishment

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46826485/chapters/121042468

Ship: Dom Castiel/Sub Dean Winchester

Rating: Mature

Total Word Count: 3,587

AO3 Tags: Collars, Dom/sub, Total Power Exchange, 24/7 Dom/sub, Punishment, Discipline, Caning

Chapter 1 found here

“Boots off and get up.” Cas tugged the leash, tapping his foot impatiently.

Dean shifted position so he could untie his boots, carefully placing them on the mat beside the shoe rack. Another of Castiel’s rules – shoes belong on the shoerack, work boots belong on the floor.

Then he struggled to his feet. His bad knee was protesting at being on the ground for so long, and he tried to stretch it, clenching his teeth as the feeling returned to his legs and hoping he was doing a good enough job of hiding his discomfort.

Getting old sucked, and he really hoped Cas hadn’t noticed.

Of course, Cas noticed. Very little got past him, whether Dean wanted it to or not. He stepped forward, closer, in that way he had of completely invading his personal space. Dean resisted the urge to take a step back.

“Are you okay?” Cas’ hand cupped Dean’s cheek as he asked the question, raising his head so their eyes met. Dean couldn’t help but lean into the touch, turning his face to nuzzle the dry, lightly calloused hand. “Is it your knee?”

Dean considered lying, but it was a fleeting thought. When they’d started this, when Dean had first given everything he had and was to Cas all those years ago – decades, a rude voice in Dean’s reminded him – communication had been their biggest obstacle. 

The irresistible force of Castiel “No Filter” Novak had met the immovable object of Dean “Emotions are for the Weak” Winchester, and they’d put a lot of work into breaking down those barriers.

So no, Dean wasn’t going to lie and say his knee was all right. But still he struggled to admit it out loud, instead nodding into Cas’ palm.

“Are you okay to continue?” Cas’ voice was earnest, and he turned Dean’s face gently back towards him. “You will be on your knees for the punishment I have planned. There is an alternative penance available if necessary. I won’t hold it against you if you decide to take that, instead. It won’t be a softer option, but it might be better for your knee.

“But regardless of whichever you choose, Dean Winchester, you will be punished for your infraction today.”

His voice was gentle, his eyes full of compassion. Dean had never loved him more than he did in that moment, and it just made him feel all the worse for disappointing him. “I’m good.” His voice broke on the last word, and he cleared his throat roughly. “I’ll tell you if I need to break.”

Cas searched his face for a moment. Seemingly satisfied with what he found, he nodded once and pulled the leash tight in his fist. “Follow.”

Dean followed.

The kitchen wasn’t the reason they’d bought this house. This particular kitchen shouldn’t be the reason why anyone would buy this house. Small, cramped, poorly planned, and with a colour scheme the Brady Bunch would die for, the kitchen was next on Dean’s list of things they had to fix.

When they had the time.

And the money.

No, it wasn’t the kitchen that had made Cas’ eyes light up when they first toured the property. It was the yard. Huge and wild overgrown, Cas had taken one look at the patch of land backing onto the woods that was that. Everything else was secondary.

He’d spent the months since they’d moved in taming the garden, enamoured with its established oak trees, swathes of wildflowers, and the pond with its own rundown jetty and boathouse.

The jetty and the boathouse were also on Dean’s list of things to fix.

As if he sensed Dean’s wandering mind, Cas gave a tight jerk on the leash. It was effective in bringing Dean back to the present, but almost toppled him off balance. The rough edges of the heavy collar dug in painfully, scraping against his skin.

“Ow, dude. What the fuck.”

“Dean.” Cas rounded on him, bundling the leash tightly in his fist and pulling Dean towards him. “Do we need to have another discussion about respect?”

“No, sir.”

Loosening the leash, Castiel produced a blindfold from his jacket pocket and handed it to Dean, who stared blankly back at him.

“Well? Do I have to do everything? Put it on.”

Dean scrambled to cover his eyes with the length of black silk, knotting it at the back of his head. By now, his heart was racing and his hands were shaking. He struggled with the knot for a few seconds, cringing inside when he heard his Dom’s blow out a frustrated breath. 

With his vision gone, the outside world rapidly slid away from him it seemed like his entire existence was held in the hand that ran across his cheekbone and nose, the leash that dragged across his face, as Castiel checked the fit of the blindfold. He ran his hands around the back of Dean’s head, scraping his nails across his scalp and pulling on his hair. Hard enough for it to hurt.

When Castiel tsked in disappointment and adjusted the blindfold’s knot, Dean felt a flutter in his stomach, and he swallowed nervously. He instinctively sought his Dom’s approval, though at this stage all he could hope for was the promise of forgiveness.

“Next time, boy, do better.” His head was yanked backwards as Castiel took a fistful of hair in his hand and growled. “Hands behind your back.”

Dean obeyed, clasping his right wrist with his left hand.

“Yes sir. Sorry sir.”

The leash tugged at his collar, and he stepped forward carefully. He knew they were passing through the kitchen door when felt the change from carpet to tile beneath his bare feet. He ran straight into something solid, then flinched back as he realised it was Castiel.

There was another heavy sigh, and more disappointed tutting. The rebellious part of Dean, the part that always landed him in a lot more trouble than it was worth, ached to ask how long Castiel had been practicing his chipmunk impersonations.

Thankfully, he managed to stay silent on the topic.

“Take your jeans off, Dean.”

Dean undid the fly of his jeans, pushing them to his feet and stepping out of them. He stumbled a little at this part, the blindfold disorienting him and throwing his balance off, but a steadying touch on his arm kept him from falling. He sent a grateful smile towards where he hoped his husband was standing and felt it keenly when the contact was broken.

“And the rest. Hand them to me when you’re done.”

They were yellow today. Silky smooth, with a fine lace mesh at the front. The panties follow his jeans, but he slowed down a little as he pulled them over his hips. He knew this was Cas’ favourite part, and he hoped to win some brownie points with a little bit of a show.

His socks quickly followed.

Again, there was a hand at his elbow as he bent down to pick them up. 

He tried to say thank you, but Castiel shoved the panties into his open mouth. Untying the blindfold, he deftly retied it lower on Dean’s face, across his stuffed mouth, effectively gagging him.

Castiel unclipped the leash and laid it on the table, and Dean blinked owlishly in the sudden light, taking in the scene before him.

It was their grocery order, tipped out from the bags, scattered across the kitchen floor. Tinned food, boxes of pasta and cereal, cookies and fruit and vegetables, bottles of water and soda. Dean noticed, thankfully, that there weren’t any cold items.

Cas gripped Dean’s chin with his hand, forcing him to look at the chaos. 

“When I got your message, when I realised you’d forgotten about dinner tonight, I called Michael to inform him dinner was cancelled. Then I came home early from work.”

Dean cringed. He knew how busy Cas was at work. How many hours he was putting in while they tried to keep their small family of two afloat. And he knew how much Cas hated dealing with his asshole brother.

“Luckily, I arrived home in time to salvage the items requiring refrigeration. You, Dean Winchester, will put the rest away.”

Dean knew it wasn’t going to be as easy as just that. He’d spent too many years living with Castiel and his devious mind to believe it would be easy as just putting away the groceries. Moisture gathered in his mouth, and he sucked at the panties. They were slightly tangy, and definitely not clean, after a full day at work.

“We have rules for a reason, Dean. And you agreed to abide by those rules when you agreed to your role in our relationship.” Cas was looking at him now, his eyes full of compassion. “I don’t like to punish you, Dean. I knew you didn’t deliberately set out to disappoint me. However, and I assure you of this, I am very disappointed.”

Dean’s eyes burned and he felt tears father as the shame that threatened to overwhelm him. 

“Down.”

He knelt on the tiled floor, shoulders slumped and eyes down, his left hand clutching his right wrist behind his back. Stripped from the waist down, his bare ass resting on his ankles, he felt on display and vulnerable.

“Eyes closed.”

He didn’t even think of disobeying. He heard Castiel’s footsteps on the tile, passing him, heading back down the hallway, and he waited in silence and darkness while his mind churned. What was he fetching? What was he going to do?

“All fours, head down. Don’t move.”

He jumped at the voice and, eyes still tightly closed, hurried to obey. Ass in the air, head resting against his crossed arms. The position exposed his ass perfectly, and he drew a deep and shuddering breath. Whatever was going to happen, would happen. A belt, that heavy wooden paddle with the tiny holes, or the cane that made him feel like his skin was being flayed from his body. He drew a shuddering breath and braced for impact.

He almost jumped out of his skin when a gentle hand caressed his bare ass, reaching through his legs to play with his genitals. As unaroused as he was at the prospect of punishment, still he started to harden a little as Cas first rolled his balls in his hand, then ran a feather light touch across his dick.

If Dean didn’t know any better, he’d think he was being assessed.

Without warning, Castiel yanked his balls backwards through his legs. He let out a muffled yelp in shock and surged forward on instinct, crying out again when the vice-like grip didn’t let up. There was a hard slap to his asscheek, which Dean was certain left a handprint. Before he could make another noise he felt something cold and hard snap around his balls, trapping them behind his legs.

The snick of a lock closing reached his ears, and it seemed so much louder in the darkness than his ragged, uneven breathing. He felt the wooden crossbars of the humbler settle against the backs of his thighs, and shivered as Castiel laid a hand on his ass, gently rubbing away the sting from earlier.

He heard Castiel stand up. Felt him toeing at his balls, trapped behind his legs. Heard him step back.

A word – “stay” – was all the warning he had. He heard the cane moving through the air, felt it make contact with his ass, and half a second later his world exploded in pain. The shock was enough to send him mindlessly scrambling to his feet, eyes still tightly closed, before he was stopped by the jolt of the humbler pulling his balls tight behind him.

He screamed behind his makeshift gag.

A rough hand grabbed his hair and forced his head back down to the ground. He whimpered at Castiel’s voice in his ear, “I said stay.”

Four stripes from the cane across his ass followed in quick succession. He fought to draw a breath between each hit, struggled to stay as he was told, with his head on his arms. He was acutely aware of his position, the humbler nestled against his thighs as the cane sliced through the air inches above his exposed balls.

After the last stripe, he sagged forward, hissing as Castiel ran a hand over his burning ass. He’s not sure how long he knelt there, body quivering and eyes closed tight. He heard Castiel moving around him.

“Dean, you can open your eyes.”

He did. Blinking to adjust to the light, turning his head to follow the sound of Castiel’s voice, to see the man towering over him.

“Pick up the groceries and put them away.”

Time passed as Dean completed his task. 

He couldn’t stand up straight without the humbler pulling painfully at his balls, so he crawled, gathering up the items and moving them into the cupboards that served as a pantry. For once he was thankful for their pokey kitchen, that he didn’t have to reach higher than his shoulder to put anything away. 

Whenever he slowed, Cas would casually flick at him with the cane. Never hard enough to really hurt, but enough to make him jump, which caused the humbler to pull painfully on his balls. By the time he was finished, he was shaking, breathing heavily through the gag, muscles on fire.

Dean crawled back to Cas and knelt in front of him, feeling vulnerable and exposed and unsure what to do next.

Cas removed the gag, held a bottle of water up to his lips, and Dean drank greedily. With a hand on either side of his face, rubbing gently at the muscles in his jaw to relieve the pain from the gag, Castiel leant his forehead against Dean’s. His words were soft against his skin. “You’re forgiven.”

Then he clipped the leash to Dean’s collar and led him into their small living room. A couple of thrifted sofas, an old TV, and a coffee table rescued from garbage day a couple of streets over and carefully restored. And in the corner a crate, big enough for a large dog, stood with its door open.

Castiel led Dean to the crate, stopping for a moment to remove the humbler, and unclipped his leash again. Dean didn’t hesitate, crawling through the cage door, before flopping down on the pile of soft blankets with a sigh. Cas pet his hair, called him a good boy, and closed the cage door on him.

For the next few hours, Dean slept soundly in his nest of blankets while Cas tapped quietly away at his laptop, catching up on work.

Later, Dean had woken up and showered, they’d both eaten dinner, and gone to bed. They’d talked about their days, and Cas had removed the heavy punishment collar, replacing it with the soft brown one. He’d massaged Dean’s knee, and Dean had settled down next to him, tucked in against his body, breathing softly.

Dean was always quiet after a punishment, and Cas let him take what time he needed to come back to himself. When he had, he spoke into the darkness.

“Be home on time tomorrow, Dean. Michael and his family are coming for dinner.”

[voxvulgi]

Eddie ain't much of a celebrating guy. You'll pop Christmas at his doorstep and he'll swish it away like dog shit, grimace and pinched nose and everything. You offer him celebrations to suck up to the great nation he's stuck in and he'll set a few barns on fire to make his own firework. And Valentine's Day? Well, Valentine's Day knows where it can shove its saint and its traditions... usually, at least. He wouldn't say he waited in particular for this day for more selfish reasons than the one offered, but he'd be lying if he denied it. Would he rather see Jackie with himself? Yes. But that's not the only reason he 'kidnapped' her. All these festivities... perfect for presents and suitors. He'd figured, she'd rather be standing with him at a gas station in Fuckingnowhereville than be paraded around as a season-suited product. He throws the rest of his cigarette into the curb and grins. "Alright, little bird. For today and today only, I'll take ya wherever y'wanna go. So... Where y'wanna go?" ((hope this is okay ;W;W;W;))

Jackie was on the verge of faking her period when Eddie came by her window to "kidnap" her. It was half-relief, half-hassle when he helped her climb out, and her dress kept getting caught on shit all the way from home to the gas station. "Today and today only? That sounds like a lie. You'd take me anywhere I want any day, and you know it," she retorted, looking around her as if to make sure they weren't followed. She got many looks on the way here, which she contributed to how fancy she looked. If the dress got ruined...well, she wouldn't care. She kinda wanted to cut it. Or maybe-- oh. OH! "I can't go anywhere fun in this huge dress!" she exclaimed suddenly, giving Eddie a shove. "Take me to your place! I need to get changed! I can wear some of your shit; that'll make walking much easier."

[yourfaveisamuppet]

So a lot of this post is pretty terrible, and we could spend all day dissecting why courting engagement is not in fact the anti-homogeny (?) praxis that these folks claim it to be. Or discussing how tumblr's thriving bullying culture probably contributes more to engagement (or lack thereof) than liking posts. Or how human beings are not in fact morally obligated to act as free advertising for indie creators.

But the most egregious fucking bullshit here is two comments up, where sabrinaacarpenters "proves" that engagement has fallen since 2013. For the record, I don't have access to the kind of metrics I'd need to say whether or not engagement has fallen. It may well have. But the methods she (pronouns taken from bio) uses to "prove" it are a great example of lying-by-numbers.

Sabrinaacarpenters posts screenshots of notes supposedly taken from posts she made in 2013. Red flag number one: there are no timestamps in the provided screenshots, nor links to the posts in question. In other words, they could be from more recent (or older) posts, or completely fabricated, and we'd have no way of knowing.

(Actually it's red flag number two, because number one is the slippery-slope guilt trap that is the entire conceit of this post. Content-free by 2023? Really?)

For the sake of argument, however, let's assume she is telling the truth and the screenshots are from real posts made in 2013. They still tell us fuckall about engagement in 2013. Why? Because the screenshots were taken nearly a decade later (2022 for those who have timestamps turned off) and include engagement for that entire period. Of course the ratio of reblogs to likes is higher than a post made today. You can only like a post once, but have unlimited reblogs. That means if I see a post today, and I like and reblog it, the ratio of my engagement is 1:1. If I see it tomorrow and decide to reblog, that ratio goes up to 2:1. It can never get lower, unless I delete those reblogs, because I've already used my one like. It can, however, get infinitely higher. We know that tumblr users tend to reblog posts more than once. As the post gets older and continues to circulate, it stands to reason that it would gain reblogs faster than likes, even if most people who see it only like it.

I don't have a snappy conclusion here. I'm just begging you guys to be more intentional about the numbers you share. This post is harmless enough, if obnoxious. But these are the same tactics used to fuel antivax paranoia, to justify anti-trans bills, to back up any number of false and bigoted claims. You may not have fallen for those particular claims, but you're not immune to propaganda, as the saying goes. Statistical and mathematical literacy isn't a foolproof vaccine, but it's a start.

If you take nothing else away from this, at least take these:

1. Turn on your timestamps. Now. If you don't know how, ask your search engine of choice, or just poke around settings until you find it.

2. Don't reblog anything without a source. And do actually click the source before you spread it. Don't just see a link and assume it's all good. For all you know, it's a rickroll.

3. Don't spread guilt traps. Guilt is a really good way to turn off someone's critical thinking, and bad faith actors know it. I don't care if the rest of the info is good, foster an environment free of guilt. If you must, make your own post with the same info presented neutrally.

4. Check. Your. Numbers. Actually think about what they represent and how they were collected. Pick up a used stats textbook and read it. Watch one of the many many free stats & math courses on youtube. Don't share a number if you don't know where it came from. Math is only scary if you let it be, so don't let it. If you really have no idea where to start, dm me and we can brainstorm together.

i am begging you all to stop treating this site like instagram if you dont want it to be content free by next year

[directadmission]

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