#Pasha Bulker Stranded on Nobby's Beach Newcastle

[blackdiamondimages]

[porkrollfridays]

NEWCASTLE FRENCH HOT BREAD

271-273 Hunter Street, Newcastle NSW • $5

What better location to kick off a pork roll review website than the Gold Coast of New South Wales, the unsung dame of the untamed north, none other than Newcastle itself. A tiny coastal gem that drew the attention of coal hungry companies in the early twentieth century, Newy is now making a name for itself for its beautiful sun-drenched residents, constant top notch weather, and time-honoured swimming spots that will put to shame any $20 Kmart blow up kiddie pool you bought to lounge in one hot afternoon and forgot to empty before the mosquitoes started breeding.

The lovely folk at French Hot Bread on ‘Hunnah’ Street don’t really know how to up the ant from Slowvacastrian. However, what they lack in pace they make up with the quality of the bread. You know you’re at a good Vietnamese bakery when on a daily basis they’re churning out fresh loaves crustier than a fifteen year olds keyboard. Pate´ was salty and consistent, mayo was flavourless and slippery as it should be. The pork? At times it felt quite stringy and almost beefy, raising more questions than a grommet out of water. Yes, they’re called pork rolls, but the most intrinsic ingredients are the veggies - look mama, you raised ya boy right. The pickled carrot could’ve been left in the juice a good while longer and the cucumber was unpleasantly warm.

Coriander was perhaps a little too heavy, but of course it’s an absolute essential so please pipe down Facebook. Last but never ever least is chilli, but hold my clutch and drop a second gear one-wheeler in Dad’s Commodore past Broadmeadow station at 2am, because the ladies at French Hot Bread create the strongest burner this side of the F3. These pork rolls had more pieces of chilli than Bar Beach boardwalk has fitness bloggers on a Sunday morning, and boy were they hot. Not expecting to reach a personal level at such an early stage in this blog, but I was on the Ibis Hotel porcelain the next morning for longer than the Pasha Bulker was stranded at Nobby’s Beach.

VERDICT: If you’re hankering for one, there aren’t many other options. Ask for less chilli. (A generous) 2/5