#Owning Mahony

[senlinyu]

I'm excited to announce that I have signed a book deal with Del Rey at Penguin Random House in the US and Michael Joseph in the UK for my debut novel, Alchemised, a standalone dark fantasy set in a war-torn world of necromancy and alchemy, in which a healer with amnesia is taken as a prisoner of war and must fight to protect her lost memories and the secrets hidden among them. It will grapple with themes of trauma and survival, legacy, and the way that love can drive one to extreme darkness, and it is, as you may be able to tell, a reimagined version of Manacled.

I know I’ve been rather quiet about my publishing journey, and a lot of that has been because I didn’t want to spark any concerns or worry that I might be abruptly taking away a story that is such a deep part of myself and that I know has meant so much to so many people. This process has unfolded very slowly and quietly because I have tried to be mindful as I could be in every step of the way. 

As most of you know, I have been a reader in fandom long before I ever began to write. Fanfiction is incredibly special to me, and I have tried to do my best not to undermine its legal protection or allow my works to do so either. During the last several years, there has been a growing issue with illegal sales of Manacled, putting both me and the incredible community that shares fanfiction freely in legal jeopardy. 

After consulting with the OTW as well as other lawyers, it has grown clear that as a transformative writer I have limited options in protecting my stories from this kind of exploitation, but I wasn’t sure what to do; I didn’t want to just take the story down, in part because I worried that might only exacerbate the issue, but I didn’t know what other options I had. Then I suddenly had this idea of alchemy, which was peculiarly appropriate; an academic world filled with unique transmutational abilities, and a necromantic war against people who had discovered the secrets of immortality, and I could see a path to reimagining the story while still holding on to as much of the original spirit of Manacled as possible. 

I began redrafting the concept privately around Christmas 2022, and then as if the universe had aligned, just as I was finishing, Caitlin Mahony and Rivka Bergman of WME reached out to me and were delightfully enthusiastic about concepts and ideas for my new alchemical world and the ways I had reimagined the story. 

I'm thrilled to be working with Emily Archbold, my visionary editor at Del Rey, along with Rebecca Hilsdon at Michael Joseph in the UK, to polish this novel for publication in Fall 2025. I feel uniquely privileged that both my publishing teams are familiar with Manacled and understand how special it is to so many people, and how important it is that this reimagining captures the same spirit while also having its own wings. 

Manacled is not going anywhere at present. It will remain online throughout 2024, at which point it will, if you’ll pardon the pun, alchemise for 2025 and be removed from AO3. 

I'm so thankful to all of you who've enjoyed my works, and I hope that I can continue to rely on your support as I take my next steps as an author.

[couch-house]

Fleebay Beepo playlist! [youtube link] [zip link]

it's been foreverrr since i finished a character playlist--i missed doing this! tracklist and director's commentary under the cut teehee :)

if you disagree with any of my choices, just remember: 1) this is my playlist for me to listen to made of songs I like for me 2) you just don't see my vision 3) you don't know him like i do 4) make your own so i can disagree with yours too.

WDKYWMYAK -- Rabbit junk

This is a Killing Game After All -- Gadgetor

chance bought this cd from the comic store. i think the album is Doom-inspired? pretty cool! check it out! anyway this first section is pretty obviously all violence killing and maiming etc

we're coming down out of the chaotic songs into some confusion for the amnesia arc, starting with ministry and boards of canada. 7 references an unwilling change of the self, and just fits the vibe right now. 8... should be obvious lol.

3. All Futures -- The Armed

4. Bears -- Mass of the Fermenting Dregs

5. You Know What You Are -- Ministry

6. 1969 -- Boards of Canada

sorry i heard a psychedelic rock song that starts with a big cat meow and blacked out. EBONY MOMENT!!! this and the next couple songs are again more about contributing to the Feeling of the groovy train than a direct relation to the lyrics. though 10 can be justified by the fact he's british.

7. Long Road Home -- Oneohtrix Point Never

8. I Don't Remember -- Peter Gabriel

9. Come Back June -- Pussy

i didn't think i would end up keeping this song when i threw it on here but it just... works really well structurally. sigh... okay well it kind of works thematically. we're moving into some merger au territory at this point, which is my way as a fan to give fleet more of a self-actualization arc. establish his own identity, make friends, accept his existence a bit more. 13 is again more focused on the caring environment of groovy train (and the idea that this won't last forever) but we'll come back around to merger in a second.

10. Hey, Mister Sun -- Bobby Sherman

11. Baby All the Time -- Julien Love (NOTE: NOT IN YT PLAYLIST)

12. Handlebars -- Flobots

i'm so obsessed with this as a song from fleet to sonic. esp focused on the idea of fleet being the trauma dump that everyone wants dead and sonic being the one who gets to keep their friends. another lucky cd find--this time thrifted. this band still has their old website up--you can contact them if you'd like to get ahold of your own copy!

13. Cursis Melodías -- Natalia Lafourcade

14. Flagiolletes -- Billy Mahonie

15. Wake Up To Be You -- The Aesthetics

16. Every Home a Prison ft. Jello Biafra -- DJ Coldcut (Inevitable Alien Nation mix)

i'm in love with this song. we're back in merger au btw. fleet is now a goddamn hooligan in the street (teenager socializing outside with his friends).

17. Default -- Django Django

we're getting to the end of his life! canon, not au. once again on the idea of fleet (dying, cringe) being a comparative failure. the next two songs are our big explosive end! 18 is another band i found from a thrifted cd. lucky!

the end! thanks for listening! ^_^ as a treat, YOU get to see the special bonus track: The Adventures of Little White Baby -- No Soap, Radio.

18. Werewolf -- Progger

19. light speed drift ft Kasane Teto + Adachi Rei -- frog96

[motions1ckn3ss]

'I Cannot Heave My Heart Into My Mouth’: Shakespeare and Alice Winn’s In Memoriam

or, an academic blog post i wrote for an english literature assignment as part of my shakespeare module at uni. a huge thank you to @jovienna for proofreading and providing the most helpful suggestions, i'm very proud of this piece and i just got the mark back for it today and i received a 2:1! enjoy :)

‘But since she pricked thee out for women’s pleasure, / Mine be thy love and thy love’s use their treasure’ (Shakespeare 13-14): a declaration of queer love, not just in Shakespeare’s Sonnet 20, but also in Alice Winn’s debut novel In Memoriam, published in 2023. Throughout the novel, the character of Ellwood quotes various poems with famously homoerotic undertones as a way of professing his love for Gaunt, a fellow student at the boarding school they attend, in an era of repression and illegality concerning homosexuality. The works of Shakespeare become some of the most notable amongst this number.

Shakespeare’s Sonnet 20 depicts desire for a man that he cannot have. The love interest of the poem, being a man, must be for the pleasure of women only, as Nature has decided. As the closing lines express, all Shakespeare can offer the man is his own love. The meaning of these lines are certainly not lost on Ellwood, and to the regret of the poet-speaker who is resigned to Platonic love (Mahony 70), writes them ‘in pencil on the wall above Gaunt’s bed, and Gaunt had hoped they meant something.’ (Winn 42).

Despite this, Gaunt refuses to let himself believe this possibility, though Ellwood assumes that he simply does not reciprocate his feelings – ‘anyway, Gaunt already knew that Ellwood loved him. Because of the sonnets.’ (Winn 113). More than three hundred years after the publication of his sonnets, Shakespeare’s words connect with Ellwood and provide him with an outlet. Ellwood deliberately selects Sonnet 20 to ensure Gaunt knows of his love in a way that stops him ‘going completely mad and confessing wild, undying love for him, which he knew would have made Gaunt extremely uncomfortable.’ (Winn 113). Shakespeare puts pen to paper to write of his own unrequited love for another man, and Ellwood follows in his footsteps.

These closing lines of Sonnet 20 are not the only writings of Shakespeare referenced in In Memoriam, with King Lear arguably creating an even more heartfelt moment between the two men. The First World War, in all its tragedy, does bring Ellwood and Gaunt together, with the two only acting on their desires amidst the ‘hyper-masculine atmosphere of war’ (Winn 120). Following their honourable discharge from the army, the two move to Brazil together to live in relative safety. Ellwood suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder, and as a result of this no longer recites poems as he used to, unable to see the joy and meaning in doing so after seeing what one man can do to another in the name of war. Without his poetry as a means of expression, Ellwood struggles to express his emotions and the love he feels for Gaunt, leaving us with the heart-wrenching lines ‘some long-dead poet must have written the lines with which to answer, but Ellwood no longer knew them.’ (Winn 342).

And yet it is the words of Shakespeare, a long-dead poet, which Ellwood utilises to convey the sincerity and weight of his emotion to Gaunt when he feels a simple ‘I love you’ would not suffice. Frustrated with his own inability, Ellwood evokes the words of Cordelia, Lear’s daughter, so that Gaunt knows it is not a lack of love which prevents him from speaking.

‘Ellwood grimaced and shook his head, clearly frustrated. “No, Henry, I,” he said, “I – I cannot heave my heart into my mouth.” Gaunt stared at him. Ellwood looked just as shocked as he was. “Shakespeare,” said Ellwood. “King Lear.”’ (Winn 375)

‘Can it be that Cordelia’s emotion silences her at a moment when it is vital that she should speak?... Can it be that the quality and weight of her love drives her to understatement and to brusqueness?’ (Morris 141). Ivor Morris’s reasoning for Cordelia’s words ring true not just for the context of King Lear, but also for the final pages of In Memoriam. Much like Cordelia, it is not a lack of love which leaves Ellwood speechless, but an abundance of it. Throughout his adolescence, Ellwood finds solace and comfort in Shakespeare’s sonnets, quoting his words to convey his emotion when his own will not suffice. Following the tragedies the war has brought the pair and the world alike, Ellwood turns from these romantic poems to a tragic play in order to suitably express this shift in his feelings. Witnessing the horrors of war has changed him fundamentally as a person, and yet the works of Shakespeare, alongside his unwavering love for Gaunt, remain a constant in his life.

Works Cited

Mahony, Patrick. “Shakespeare’s Sonnet Number 20: Its Symbolic Gestalt.” American Imago, vol. 36, no. 1, 1979, pp. 69-79.

Morris, Ivor. “Cordelia and Lear.” Shakespeare Quarterly, vol. 8, no. 2, 1957, pp. 141-158.

Shakespeare, William. “Sonnet 20: A woman’s face, with Nature’s own hand painted.” The Sonnets and A Lover’s Complaint, Penguin Classics, 2009, p. 22.

Winn, Alice. In Memoriam. Penguin Books, 2023.

[seacavepuzzle]

The Road to Yesterday (1925)

The Crossword Puzzle Book, the first (and for some while the only) publication of the upstart New York publishing house of Simon & Schuster, had not only introduced a new type of word game to Americans earlier that year [1924] but also touched off a sort of national crossword puzzle mania. [Bertha Mahony’s Bookshop for Boys and Girls] had at first stocked just a few copies of the novelty book (which came with its own “free” Venus pencil). “Very soon,” however, as Mahony reported, “the supply gave out and the book was reordered. Its fame spread fast (faster than The Plastic Age or So Big)” — two other bestsellers that year.

Leonard S. Marcus, Minders of Make-Believe

[foundation-site-523]

Communication relay active.

This is Site-523. We are attempting communication with you, the authors of our own universe, to gain a better understanding of both of our worlds. In exchange for your information, we will share some of our own.

-- Dr. Steven Moloch, Pataphysics Director.

//OOC

Welcome to an ask blog centered around my SCP OCs! More information on them can be found here, which will be updated as time goes on. If you don't feel like clicking the link, here's a quick list of the characters:

Dir. Margot Soumare: 58 years of age, she/her. Site Director for Site-523.

Dr. Steven Moloch: 50 years of age, he/him. Pataphysics Director.

Finn Mahony: 63 years of age, they/them. Maintenance Superintendent.

Dr. Matthew Rayner: 44 years of age, he/him. Meteorologist.

Dr. Evelyn Grant: 41 years of age, she/her. Psychologist.

Sidney Newmaker: 36 years of age, they/them. Containment Specialist.

Michael Othello: 32 years of age, any pronouns. Junior researcher.

Sasha Kiselyova: 28 years of age, she/they. Security Officer.

Site-523: 15 years of age (technically), she/it. Foundation facility.

My main blog is @mrmeltingpoint, and you can find my art there! I'll post all Site-523 related stuff here (at least, for now) so don't worry about missing it. I hope you have fun here!

[shewhowas39]

Title: "Dark Amethyst" Card: Ace of Wands Deck: The Bohemian Gothic Tarot by Alex Ukolov & Karen Mahony Ship: vague mention of Astarion x June (female durge OC) Warnings: light references to Astarion's past Summary: Astarion sees some lovely fabric and feels a spark of creativity. (Takes place in early Act 1)

Astarion walks through the Emerald Grove, looking for something - anything - to entertain him. After Wyll's suggestion that the group spend a few extra hours here, taking the time to bathe and gather supplies, he had wasted little time before finding a mad old woman selling a collection of soaps and products for his hair. Unfortunately, Shadowheart and June have not yet returned from the hot spring, which means he still has to wait before putting them to use.

But what in the hells is he meant to do while he waits? Talk to these people? Absolutely not. Everyone here is miserable, and the last thing he's interested in is hearing the druids complain about the tielings or the tieflings complain about the druids. June might be dragging the party into this mess, but it doesn't mean he has to socialize with these strangers who have nothing of use to offer him.

But then he sees the fabric. Its on display at one of the druid merchants' little tables, along with a variety of sewing supplies. It's not particularly high quality - just a basic, soft linen - but the color is divine. A rich, heavily saturated shade of dark purple.

He stops and just stares at it for a moment, an image flashing unbidden into his mind of a simple-yet-classic, loose fitting shirt with an almost scandalously deep V neckline, in that beautiful color.

Astarion knows how to sew. It is a skill he picked up not long after being "taken in" by Cazador. It started out of a desperate desire to hold on to something of his - constantly fixing the damage done to the clothes he'd owned before becoming a vampire spawn. The idea of throwing them out - which would have been much easier - was too painful. too close to admitting that his old self was gone.

So he'd learned to sew, so that he might make the little repairs needed to keep his old clothing presentable. He'd even come to find some quiet joy in it. He'd taken to embroidering little jokes on the insides of his shirts and underwear. Things Cazador would never bother to take notice of. It was like he had told June earlier that morning - it was cathartic.

But he's never actually made anything. He's thought about it. Spent hours working out in his head how he'd construct an entire wardrobe, all the stitching techniques he'd employ. It has all been imaginary, though. If he had ever dared to actually create something, Cazador would have made sure it was ruined, just to see the pain it caused him.

"See something you like, my good felllow?" the halfling merchant asks with an overly familiar smile that would normally set Astarion's teeth on edge. But in this instance, he gives a friendly smile back.

"That fabric - the linen - the color is gorgeous."

"Oh, yes! It's been dyed with a very rare, very expensive shade called Dark Amethyst. It's one of my favorites. Are you interested in purchasing a few meters?"

"No," Astarion says quickly - instinctively - but then pauses.

He's not with Cazador now. And he's already vowed never to go back. Sure, he might be on the verge of turning into a mind flayer, but he can at least be a well dressed tentacle monster, can't he? And if they do manage to find a cure somehow - well, he's got his little plan with June. He's pretty sure she's already falling for it. It won't be long until she's lovesick putty in his hands, and then perhaps she'll even help him destroy Cazador.

If ever there was a time to embrace this creative urge, it's right now. wth that gods damned stunning purple linen.

"Actually - yes. I'll take a few meters and any matching thread you have."

***

you can find this and my other bg3 fic on my ao3! hope you enjoyed

[rebelrebelwrites]

Did someone already ask about Oak Park for the WIP game?

They did not, and I appreciate you asking! Summoning all of my emotional fortitude to answer this because hello anxiety (cue the Jason Isbell song), but this one is my current WIP; an original novel.

The Summary: Historical preservationist Charlotte Harper accepts an assignment in Oak Park, Illinois to authenticate an unprecedented find: letters found between famous architect Frank Lloyd Wright's first wife, Catherine, and his most maligned (and first female) employee, Marion Mahony. When the letters stand to prove that much more was between the two women than previously believed, Charlotte sets out to unravel the true history... the only thing standing in her way? Sam, the self-satisfied but infuriatingly charming preservation carpenter on the project, who found the letters in the first place.

The Gist: A story told in 2 parts—of self-discovery and romance for Charlotte and Sam, as well as Marion and Catherine in the not-too-distant past.

The Snippet:

"What are you doing here?" Charlotte asks.

"You know, I think that's the second time today you've asked me that," Sam says. A trickle of shame shivers down Charlotte's back, but she ignores it.

"It’s still a valid question," she says.

"What do you think, Charlie?" he asks, a little exasperation bleeding into his amusement. "I live here."

“You... live here,” she repeats.

“Funny, we didn’t use to have an echo in here,” he smarms. “Yes. Me and Philly boy, Philly boy and I. Frank’s the first floor, we’re the second. Assume you’re taking the attic?”

“Well, I was,” she says. “Now I’m not so sure.”

“C’mon now, Chuck. You don’t need to worry about me.” Laughter lights up his eyes, and she notes green threaded with specks of gold. “I’ve already forgiven you for this morning. No need to be embarrassed. Besides–” his tongue flicks between his teeth, a teasing taste of his own smile. “I like a woman on top.”

His grin grows. Glows. Charlotte can’t help but stare at the sheer gall of it.

“Wow,” she manages. “You’re. Wow.”

“Effortlessly charming? I know, I know. But we should keep this professional.” He winks—again—before bursting into real laughter at the look on her face: something halfway between horror and disbelief.

“Relax, relax,” he says, “Look, I’m sorry, but you make it too easy.” He holds up his hands in mock surrender. “I’ll be good, yeah?”

Charlotte sighs, low and long. “Professionalism. Right.”

She turns toward the narrow stairway, but before she can steal away, Frank emerges from the entrance to his apartment, dark eyes darting between them. 

“Oh! Sam, good. I just found the key to Charlotte’s apartment. Do you mind showing her? The stairs–”

“No worries, Frankie. I got it. D’you–?” Sam bends a little to rub at Phil the Great’s belly, letting go of his leash. Wordlessly, Frank beckons the dog forward with a few light taps on his thigh. Charlotte can’t help but be impressed when he immediately obeys, padding forward into Frank’s apartment.

“He can keep me company for a bit,” Frank agrees. He hands Sam a key before turning to her. “I hope you don’t mind. These stairs are a bit tricky for my old knees.”

“Of course; I don’t mind. Not at all,” Charlotte says, still halfway up the first step.

“Bless you,” he says, mustache twitching. “Let me know if you have any questions once Sam’s done showing you around.”

“I will. Thank you.” He nods, then shuffles back into his apartment, leaving the door slightly ajar. Charlotte stares after him, feeling a bit bereft until warm knuckles nudge her elbow. 

She starts; looks over her shoulder at Sam, her brain short-circuiting a little at the unexpected touch and how close he’s hovering behind her. He meets her stare with a raise of his eyebrows.

“Only one way to go, Chuck,” he says, tilting his chin up. The movement draws her attention to his throat; the bob of his Adam’s apple, and a spiky something scratches in her chest before she shakes her head, pushing it away.

Her spine stiffens. “Right,” she says. She turns forward and starts to climb.

She’s glad she didn’t force Frank to show her the apartment as they wind their way up the narrow staircase, passing what must be Sam’s place on the second floor, before ascending to the attic. 

The third-floor landing is definitely cramped. Sam has to stoop to avoid hitting his head, and they're a little closer than Charlotte considers comfortable, crowding each other and the apartment entrance: another door that's too big to be there, despite looking original.

"Well, this is it," Sam says. He grins, gestures to the door, then stoops even more to fit the key in the lock and push it open. She watches him duck through, following with uncertain footsteps.

Thankfully, the apartment itself is a bit bigger than the landing. Sam has to move to the middle to avoid brushing his head against the ceiling, but he can stand upright, at least. She notes low light, a tiny kitchen—barely more than two burners and a slim fridge—and to her right, a tight hallway she hopes leads to a bathroom and a bedroom.

To her left, a small living room—dim, too, but awash in dancing color. Charlotte beams as she weaves between a cozy little couch and a bookcase, making for the dormer window of shimmering stained glass.

“Is this original, too?”

“Think so,” Sam says. He watches her press a palm to panes made of myriad shades: jewel-bright blue, peridot green, burnt orange, deep crimson.

“You like it.”

He joins her in two strides; his shoulder brushing the wall opposite her. In her periphery, the light filtering in through the stained glass sparks more gold in his eyes.

“I do," she says, pulling her hand back. She meets his gaze, then mirrors him, leaning against the window frame.

“Me too,” he says. He smiles again; another flicker across his face before it becomes something wistful. “Almost makes me wish I’d taken this flat over mine.”

“We could always swap,” Charlotte says. Her smile twists into something more teasing before she can think better of it.

Sam lays a hand on his chest. “You wouldn’t do that to Philly, would you?”

She chuckles. "No, I wouldn't," she admits. "He clearly needs his space. Probably from you."

Sam's eyebrows shoot up his forehead, but his grin stays bright. "And you were worried! Not even a full day and you fit in fine, Chuck." He bumps her arm with his elbow, and the spiky, foreign thing in her chest turns squiggly.

"If I was worried about anything," she says, crossing her arms, "It was that you're hard of hearing. You know, since my name is Charlotte."

"Not a fan of nicknames?" he asks. "Or is it just that one in particular? We'll find something that fits you, Charlie. Give it time. We've only just met."

She clicks her tongue at him, and the squiggly something doesn't miss his eyes zero in on her mouth. She glances down at her feet; clears her throat.

"This what got you into the work?"

She looks back up at the question. He nods toward the window; his smile melting into something more mellow, like a lazy trickle of tree sap. "Or was it Wright himself?"

"Presumptuous of you," she tsks. "You know I'm here for Marion."

"Do I?" he asks. He furrows his brow, and something like the shadow that passed over his face earlier that morning reappears—fleeting and fickle, and gone in the space of a breath.

+++

I lived in Chicago for years, and recently went back and visited the FLW house/studio tour for the first time and that plus the inspo fuel that is this fandom sparked this (could maybe be an AU if you blink real, real hard) idea. We'll see if it goes anywhere!

And now I'm going to work on this today and try not to be too anxious about posting part of it on the internet 🤣

[zerogate]

In Vedic thought, then, it is the imagination that gives form to the formless. The imagination reveals the sublime. Doing so, the imagination thereby gives a living body, as it were, to the invisible universal structure of harmony (Rta) and unifying ground of being (Brahman/Atman) which precedes and transcends form itself.

But the imagination did more than this. In giving form to the formless, the imagination brought light to darkness, as it were. It brought order to chaos. Where there was disintegration, the imagination brought wholeness. Where there was death, imagination brought life. It was the power of imagination that enabled Vedic poets to sing forth songs that gave voice to Rta. The imagination allowed Vedic ritualists to perform sacred rites, which were understood to contribute to and even establish or reestablish the integrity of the divine universe itself. And, through the contemplative imagination, the meditator recognized the shining image of the divine—the immutable integrity of being itself—deep within his or her own heart.

– William K. Mahony, The Artful Universe: An introduction to the Vedic religious imagination

[redwildfury]

Fault

⚠Warning:⚠ This story contains gore, death, and major character death. If this isn't your type of content then don't read.

This story was a dream I had. It was so detailed and so shocking to not write down. I hope y'all enjoy it!

The world was ending again. Pure chaos ran through the city of New York. Nothing but agonizing screams rang throughout the city. Corpses lay in a burning pile of lava. The city having a giant crack in the streets. Lava rising from deep within the earth. Rising until it broke the surface and melted everything within its proximity. The earth's crust had been broken. The core erupting and producing hot boiling lava. The people of New York cried out. All desperately trying to get to safety. Most were unsuccessful. And those that made it, did not last long. They suffered a boiling death. Ending in a suffering wail for help. But it was not only the humans that suffered such an agonizing fate. Mutants of all kinds within the city were not spared.

If the lava didn't take them out. The raining balls of fire surely would. In the sky, above the remaining skyscrapers. Fire rained down on those below it. A hot stream. It flowed like water onto the humans and mutants in the area. Casting them in red. Boiling they're skin into sores and bursting them from the inside out.

The clouds above were dark. The usual white fluffy clouds were more misted. More wavy and separated. Blue turned to black. Ash falling from the sky and coating the streets in gray. Buildings crumbled. The earth shaking as they crashed and fell. Being consumed by the lava. The city known as New York would be no more. And as the city crumbled around them. The people that were still alive cried out. Begging for a savior. Begging for hero's to step up and stop this madness.

But the hero's of New York could do nothing but watch. Their city fell before them. Destroyed by the very person they loved. This was all their fault. They caused this. They pushed him too far. Caused him too much pain and harm. Brothers were meant to stick together. They had left him. Left him to defend himself. Offering no help in hopes he'd make it out on his own. This was their doing. Now they would reap the choice they chose. Leonardo looked on in anguish. Yelling out in desperation to make this all end. This wasn't his brothers fault! He could fix this! He had to fix this! The planet they left him on was all his fault. The missions failure was his doing. Not his brothers. He caused this with his own words and actions. A choice he made and put the ones he loved most in danger.

Donatello hadn't been much help. The genius foiled the mission by setting off a bomb too soon. He blamed himself. None of this would be happening if it weren't for him. His mahony eyes filled with sorrow. Staring into the black sky above. If only he had calculated the attack correctly! The world wouldn't be ending! Humans and mutants wouldn't be suffering such a horrible fate. April would still be here if it wasn't for him! This was all his fault.

Michelangelo wasn't cutting himself much slack either. Much like his brothers, he blamed himself. The destruction of earth was his fault. Everyone would still be alive. The world wouldn't be ending if he hadn't caused his brother such pain. His heart ached. His baby blue eyes filling with tears. The agony of his cries echoing throughout the city.

The world wouldn't be ending if it wasn't for them. Leo believed they could stop this. That they could fix it. But how could you fix something that was broken? A broken being filled with rage was almost unstoppable. The damage had been done. Of how Leo planned to fix any of this, Donnie, nor Mikey knew. They were losing so much in such a little amount of time. Their city, their friend's, their brother. If only they had seen the signs. If they had picked up on it. Sensed that something was obscure. Not even Leo had detected anything.

And now, as Raphael peered down at the chaos below. His brother's crying out to him. Begging him to stop and come down. It was not enough to bring the beast down. Giant wings flapped behind him. Creating gusts of wind that forced lava into different directions. A long tail flicked behind him, it curling and straightening before starting to flick again. His body covered in red glowing markings, that swirled and twisted all over his head, arms, and legs. And his head was adored with two red horns.

Raphael gazed upon the city in judgment. The disruption of earth was inevitable. With the first time being a mistake. The Triceratons were not this world's fate. But his. This was his planet. He alone had the power to decide what happened to this place. His decision came at midnight. A choice that could not so easily be taken back. Was made within a quick motion of his hand. The earth spilt. Causing lava to erupt from the core and flood the city in boiling fire.

He possessed a power that not many had. Raph morphed into a deadly beast. A demon of fire and rage. All thanks to his beloved brothers.

Leo stepped with stride. Looking fear in the eye and facing it with a expressionless face. "Raphael! Please, stop this!" He begged. Mikey waved his arms, attempting to get his dragonic brothers attention. "Raph, please! We're sorry!! We didn't mean for it to happen!" The youngest wailed. Fresh tears fell from his eyes. Making them swell up and drown in a sea of hot tears. Donnie let the two speak. His mind more on how they could possibly reverse this. How they could fix their broken brother.

A scowl came to Raphael's face. The words his brother's spoke were not believed. They could speak a million words and none would be believed as true. "You expect me to believe that?" His voice boomed around them. Traveling through the destroyed city. This was the first time he'd spoken to them in weeks. Ever since they brought him home he isolated himself in his room. Only ever coming out to eat. He quit training with them. Quit spending time with them. Leonardo did take notice of it. But he had not been there for Raphael like he should have.

Raphael turned his gaze from them. Their cries meant nothing. Soon this city would be gone. And then, the world would be no more. Aliens from all over the galaxy would fear him. He would have complete control of the entire universe!

"Raph! Bro! Please! We didn't mean for it to happen!! We didn't mean any of it!" Mikey screamed to the sky. His hand reaching out to the brother he cared so much for. Raphael did not care to hear his little brothers please. The choice they made would cost them. What they did would not go unnoticed or unpunished. This planet would die by his hands.

Leonardo took a chance. He gestured to his brothers, grabbing his grappling hook from his belt and firing it at a nearby building. One far from the roof they were atop. One that wasn't melted to bits yet. Donnie and Mikey followed suit. Swinging with their grappling hooks to the building. They dropped down. Landing on an unmelted street. Standing directly bellow Raphael. It was a miracle Raph hadn't spotted them yet. They were thankful for him being more busy with throwing fire upon the city. It gave them time to come up with a plan. A plan of how to bring Raphael back.

While the three spoke with one another. Leo at the lead of making a plan. Raphael flew above them. His powerful wings carried him effortlessly. As he flew, his horns began to glow a bright red. Mikey caught sight of this. The youngest took the action upon himself to cover his two older brothers. Using his shell as a shield. Mikey was able to cover them just in time. Before the dragon above could breathe fire on them. The fire erupted from Raphael's mouth. It falling to the street and forming a river of lava.

A pain filled scream rang out beside Leo and Donnie. While they remained safe, their baby brother had not. Mikey's shell was melting in the middle. Raphael's fire having hit the orange masked turtle. His shell melted rapidly. It creating a hole and sinking into the flesh. "Leo!! Make it stop!!!!" He cried. Leonardo could do nothing. Nothing much watch as Mikey's shell melted. Blood poured out of the hole. Crimson ran down Mikey's shell and legs. Pooling at their feet. Donatello rushed to get his med kit. Pulling it from his belt and patching Mikey up as quick as he could. It wasn't enough. The blood wasn't stopping. No amount of gauze or wraps could fix this. They couldn't fix this.

"Donnie please! Make it stop make it stop!!" Mikey pressed his head against the buildings wall. This pain was unlike any other. He was being burned from the inside. The lava travelling quick into his system and filling him with pain. The lava burst some of his organs. Causing more blood to surface. Causing more pain. Causing more agony. It was a slow process. It being meant to be slow for Raphael's enjoyment. But Raphael wasn't even watching. His focus was on burning down a skyscraper. He hadn't realized what he'd done.

Leonardo gave Mikey to Donnie. Positioning the two so they held each other. He pushed away from the building and glared up at their dragonic brother. "Raphael!!" He screamed. Demanding the other to look at him. Raphael cut his eyes to Leo. Finally noticing them and witnessing what he'd done to Mikey. His expressionless face didn't help matters much. Leo hoped if Raph saw what he'd done that something would snap and he would come back to them. That wasn't the case.

A grin spread to Raph's face. His body turned so he could face them, arms crossing over his chest, and tail flicking from side to side. His wings flapped, keeping him above them. "How does it feel Leo? To have everything taken from you?" Leonardo said nothing. There wasn't anything he could say. "You left me on that planet. I was experimented on and turned into this" Raph gestured to himself, his hands being placed on his chest after. They then fell to his sides, his hands resting on his hips. "You only saved me because you couldn't endure the pain Mikey and Donnie felt. But not you. You could have lived without me. Without me constantly arguing with you. To question your authority. You could have left me to rot"

Leonardo's face scrunched up in anger. The words his brother spoke were unbelievable. This was not at all how he felt! "That's not it at all! We left you because we didn't have a choice!" Leo stepped forward, leaving Donnie and Mikey's side. Stepping into the dragons range. "We left you because we couldn't find you! The Triceratons held you somewhere we couldn't find. We didn't mean for any of this to happen, please Ra-" "Save your words" Raphael lifted a hand, his hand balling into a fist. Leo jumped, moving to the side as a ball of fire came down on the street. Cracking the concrete.

"You think you can fix this. Well you can't. You can't just expect me to bend to your will and do as you say. I'm not like you. I'm not the obedient son that Splinter loves so much" Leo stomped his foot, standing in front of his brothers, covering them and yelling out to Raphael. "If you would do as your told! And not go against everything I say I never would have left you! If you weren't such a burden to this team-" Leo gasped, he smacked his hands over his mouth and looked up to Raph with tears in his eyes. "Wait- no Raph! I didn't mean!-" the ground shook. Making the three stumble and fall. Lava burst through the ground. Just nearly catching the three.

Raphael dove, his wings stretching out as he glided over them. He flew behind them. His wings starting to flap as he hovered over them. "I won't burden you anymore. This world will burn..with you along with it" Raphael flew down and turned on his side. His wings outstretched. He came close to the ground, his wing cutting into the street and splitting it in half. The building the three were resting against fell. It crumbling and falling into the spilt earth. More lava surfaced. It consumed the building. Catching it on fire and burning it into nothing.

Raphael flapped his wings and flew up. Watching in amusement as the city fell. Watching as his brothers collapsed and fell into the splitting earth. Mikey reached out, crying with a smile on his face. The earth claimed his father in death. And now it would claim him. The lava took him first. It bursting his body and melting him into ash. Donnie curled in on himself. Falling into deaths grasp with tears streaming down his face. Surely it wouldn't hurt. Lava was powerful enough to burn a human on impact right? It would do the same to him. It wouldn't hurt. A blood curdling scream echoed down the split earth. An agonizingly horrible scream of pain and betrayal. His mind failed him. His knowledge failed him. Now, he granted the satisfaction of his demonic brother hearing him die.

Leo stared into the eyes of Raphael. Those emerald green eyes had never looked more threatening. Had never held so much anger and hatred. Even with so much hatred toward him, Leonardo still loved Raphael. They were family. Brothers of a kind. Nothing would change that. Not even death. "I love you… Raphael.." Leo fell into the boiling lava. His body was consumed. Eaten by the pit of hell.

Raphael looked on in satisfaction. This city was no more. The earth would die and the galaxy would be his! No one could stop him. Not even his..brothers. Raph flew down with care. His feet hitting the lava. He walked on the boiling lava. The heat doing nothing to him as he walked to where he'd spilt the earth. He looked over the edge. Expecting to see them grappling to the side. But they were not. They were gone. Consumed by the flame. Raphael dropped to his knees. Hot tears falling down and dropping into the lava. The moment they hit the lava the tears evaporated. Misting and rising into the air. "What have I done.." The realization hit hard them any fist ever could. Of all the battles he'd ever been in. This one hurt the most. "What…why did….why!?" The dragonic turtle looked up to the sky. Staring into the black void. His anger turned into sadness. Realizing what he done was unfixable.

The earth beneath his knees rumbled. The ground erupting with lava bursting from the earth's core. Rising up like a mountain and taking over the earth in a sea of red.

This could not be undone. It could not be fixed. His brothers were dead. They died by his doings. Raphael couldn't fix this. This was his fault. It was all his fault. "It's all my FAULT"

[k00279328]

Potato prints.

Trialling some potato prints on fabric.

I turned to using fabric as opposed to paper because of it's texture, which suits the subject. It also reflects the sense of togetherness upon which the idea is based on, Deidre O' Mahony's SPUD project, with the threads connected and intertwined.

I used a mix of ink, water and paint.

Not having a potato to hand, I turned to using an apple with which I cut into quarters. I really liked the way it looked and it's shape was potato-esque I think!

I was trying these, as a way of experimenting with "potato printing", in preparation of currating a mini-community-project of my own, in the essence of Deidre.

[collingsrealestate]

Discovering Real Estate Eaglemont Melbourne

History and Charm of Eaglemont

The Beginnings of Eaglemont

Early Development and Growth

Eaglemont, nestled in the northeastern suburbs of Melbourne, has a rich history that dates back to the late 19th century. Originally part of the large estates owned by pastoralists, Eaglemont began to take shape as a residential area in the early 1900s. The establishment of the Heidelberg School of Art in the area attracted many artists, adding a unique cultural layer to its development. The area's growth was further spurred by the extension of the railway line, which made it more accessible to Melbourne's city center.

Influential Figures in Eaglemont’s History

Several key figures have influenced Eaglemont's development, most notably the artist group associated with the Heidelberg School, including Arthur Streeton and Walter Withers. Their presence and works brought a creative and bohemian flair to the suburb, making it a sought-after location for like-minded individuals. Additionally, the visionary urban planner Walter Burley Griffin and his wife, Marion Mahony Griffin, were instrumental in shaping Eaglemont's garden suburb aesthetic, which continues to define its charm today.

Architectural Evolution Over the Years

Eaglemont's architecture reflects its historical evolution, from early Federation-style homes to mid-century modern designs and contemporary residences. The area's development saw a blend of architectural styles that catered to different tastes and periods, creating a visually diverse and architecturally significant suburb. The preservation of many heritage homes ensures that Eaglemont retains its historical character while accommodating modern living.

Unique Architectural Styles

Heritage Homes and Their Significance

Eaglemont is renowned for its heritage homes, which are an integral part of its charm and appeal. These homes, often characterized by their period features such as intricate woodwork, stained glass windows, and expansive verandas, offer a glimpse into the suburb's rich past. The significance of these homes goes beyond their aesthetic appeal; they represent the historical narrative and architectural heritage of Eaglemont.

Modern Residences Blending with Classic Designs

In addition to its heritage properties, Eaglemont boasts a range of modern residences that blend seamlessly with the classic designs. Contemporary homes in Eaglemont often incorporate elements of the older architectural styles, creating a harmonious blend of old and new. This architectural diversity not only enhances the visual appeal of the suburb but also caters to a wide range of preferences among homebuyers.

Preserving the Charm: Restoration Efforts

Efforts to preserve Eaglemont's architectural charm are evident in the numerous restoration projects undertaken by residents and local authorities. These initiatives aim to maintain the historical integrity of heritage homes while updating them with modern amenities. Restoration efforts ensure that Eaglemont's unique character is preserved for future generations, making it a desirable place to live and invest in.

Community and Lifestyle

Vibrant Community Life

Eaglemont is known for its strong sense of community and vibrant social life. Residents enjoy a close-knit neighborhood where community events and activities are a regular occurrence. The Eaglemont Village Shopping Centre serves as a local hub, offering a variety of shops, cafes, and services that cater to the daily needs of residents. The community spirit in Eaglemont is further strengthened by local clubs and organizations that provide opportunities for social interaction and engagement.

Local Amenities and Services

Eaglemont offers a range of amenities and services that enhance the quality of life for its residents. From excellent healthcare facilities to well-maintained parks and recreational areas, the suburb is equipped with everything needed for comfortable living. The presence of top-rated schools and educational institutions further adds to its appeal, making it an ideal location for families.

Events and Activities in Eaglemont

The suburb hosts a variety of events and activities throughout the year, catering to diverse interests and age groups. From art exhibitions and music festivals to community markets and sporting events, there is always something happening in Eaglemont. These events not only provide entertainment but also strengthen the community bonds and enhance the suburb's lively atmosphere.

Why Invest in Real Estate Eaglemont Melbourne?

Strong Property Market

Current Market Trends and Data

Eaglemont's property market is characterized by strong demand and steady growth. The suburb's unique charm, historical significance, and high-quality lifestyle contribute to its desirability among homebuyers and investors. Current market trends indicate a robust demand for both residential and commercial properties, with prices reflecting the suburb's premium status.

Historical Property Value Growth

Over the years, Eaglemont has experienced significant property value growth, making it a lucrative investment destination. Historical data shows consistent appreciation in property values, driven by the suburb's desirability, limited supply of homes, and ongoing restoration efforts. This trend of value growth underscores the long-term investment potential of real estate in Eaglemont.

Future Market Projections

Future market projections for Eaglemont remain positive, with expectations of continued growth in property values. Factors such as ongoing urban development, infrastructure improvements, and the suburb's enduring appeal contribute to these optimistic projections. Investors can expect stable returns and potential capital gains from their investments in Eaglemont's real estate market.

Prime Location Benefits

Proximity to Melbourne CBD

One of Eaglemont's major advantages is its proximity to Melbourne's Central Business District (CBD). The suburb is well-connected to the city center through an efficient public transport network, including trains and buses. This accessibility makes Eaglemont an attractive location for professionals working in the CBD who prefer a suburban lifestyle.

Accessibility and Transportation Links

Eaglemont's strategic location offers excellent accessibility and transportation links. The suburb is serviced by major roads and highways, providing convenient access to other parts of Melbourne and beyond. Additionally, the well-connected public transport system ensures easy commuting for residents, enhancing the overall convenience and appeal of living in Eaglemont.

Nearby Attractions and Landmarks

Eaglemont is surrounded by a wealth of attractions and landmarks that add to its appeal. The suburb is close to the Yarra River and its picturesque trails, providing opportunities for outdoor activities and leisure. Additionally, cultural landmarks, shopping centers, and dining precincts are within easy reach, offering a variety of recreational options for residents.

High Quality of Life

Top-Rated Schools and Educational Institutions

Families in Eaglemont benefit from access to top-rated schools and educational institutions. The suburb is home to several prestigious schools that offer high-quality education, ensuring excellent learning opportunities for children. The presence of reputable schools enhances the suburb's appeal to families looking for a supportive educational environment.

Parks and Recreational Facilities

Eaglemont boasts an abundance of parks and recreational facilities that contribute to a high quality of life. The suburb's green spaces, playgrounds, and sports facilities provide ample opportunities for outdoor activities and leisure. These recreational amenities promote a healthy and active lifestyle for residents of all ages.

Safety and Community Well-Being

Safety and community well-being are top priorities in Eaglemont. The suburb is known for its low crime rates and friendly, supportive community. Local authorities and community organizations work together to maintain a safe and welcoming environment, ensuring that residents feel secure and content in their neighborhood.

Exploring Real Estate Opportunities in Eaglemont Melbourne

Types of Properties Available

Residential Properties

Single-Family Homes

Eaglemont offers a variety of single-family homes, ranging from charming heritage properties to modern residences. These homes provide ample living space, private gardens, and a peaceful suburban lifestyle, making them ideal for families and individuals seeking comfort and privacy.

Apartments and Condominiums

For those looking for a more compact living arrangement, Eaglemont also has a selection of apartments and condominiums. These properties offer convenience and modern amenities, catering to young professionals, couples, and downsizers who prefer low-maintenance living.

Luxury Estates

Eaglemont is home to several luxury estates that offer premium living experiences. These high-end properties feature expansive grounds, state-of-the-art facilities, and luxurious interiors, providing an opulent lifestyle for discerning buyers.

Commercial Real Estate

Office Spaces and Business Centers

The commercial real estate market in Eaglemont includes office spaces and business centers that cater to various business needs. These properties provide modern facilities, strategic locations, and a professional environment, making them suitable for a wide range of businesses.

Retail Locations

Retail properties in Eaglemont are strategically located to attract both local residents and visitors. These spaces offer excellent visibility and foot traffic, making them ideal for businesses looking to establish a presence in a vibrant community.

Investment Opportunities

Eaglemont's commercial real estate market presents several investment opportunities for investors looking to diversify their portfolios. The suburb's strong property market, strategic location, and ongoing development make it a promising destination for real estate investment.

Land and Development Projects

Available Land for New Builds

For those interested in building their dream home, Eaglemont offers available land parcels for new builds. These plots provide the opportunity to create custom residences that meet specific needs and preferences, offering a blank canvas for architectural creativity.

Current Development Projects

Several development projects are underway in Eaglemont, aimed at enhancing the suburb's infrastructure and residential offerings. These projects include new housing developments, commercial spaces, and community facilities, contributing to the suburb's growth and appeal.

Future Urban Planning

Future urban planning initiatives in Eaglemont focus on sustainable development and community enhancement. These plans aim to preserve the suburb's charm while accommodating growth, ensuring that Eaglemont remains a desirable place to live and invest in for years to come.

Key Considerations for Buyers

Budget and Financing

Understanding Property Prices

Understanding property prices in Eaglemont is crucial for prospective buyers. The suburb's premium status means that property prices can be higher than in other areas, so it's important to research and be aware of market trends and pricing.

Mortgage and Financing Options

Securing the right mortgage and financing options is essential when purchasing property in Eaglemont. Buyers should explore different lenders, interest rates, and loan terms to find the best financing solution that suits their financial situation and goals.

Budget Planning Tips

Effective budget planning is key to a successful property purchase. Buyers should consider all costs involved, including purchase price, mortgage payments, taxes, insurance, and maintenance expenses. Creating a detailed budget helps ensure that buyers can comfortably afford their investment.

Choosing the Right Property

Identifying Your Needs and Preferences

Identifying personal needs and preferences is the first step in choosing the right property. Buyers should consider factors such as property size, location, architectural style, and amenities to find a home that aligns with their lifestyle and requirements.

Evaluating Property Features

Evaluating property features is essential to ensure that the chosen home meets all expectations. Buyers should inspect the condition of the property, its layout, available amenities, and potential for future improvements to make an informed decision.

Making the Final Decision

Making the final decision involves careful consideration of all factors, including budget, property features, location, and long-term investment potential. Buyers should take their time, seek professional advice, and ensure that they are confident in their choice before proceeding with the purchase.

Working with Real Estate Agents

Finding the Right Agent

Finding the right real estate agent is crucial for a successful property transaction. Buyers should look for agents with local expertise, a strong track record, and excellent communication skills to guide them through the process.

Benefits of Professional Guidance

Professional guidance from a real estate agent offers several benefits, including market insights, negotiation skills, and access to exclusive listings. An experienced agent can streamline the buying process and help buyers find the best property that meets their needs.

What to Expect from Your Agent

Buyers can expect their agent to provide personalized service, expert advice, and support throughout the buying process. A good agent will assist with property searches, coordinate viewings, negotiate terms, and ensure a smooth transaction from start to finish.

Tips for Selling Real Estate in Eaglemont Melbourne

Preparing Your Property for Sale

Home Improvement and Renovations

Preparing a property for sale often involves home improvement and renovations to enhance its appeal and value. Sellers should focus on key areas such as kitchens, bathrooms, and curb appeal to attract potential buyers and achieve a higher sale price.

Staging and Presentation Tips

Staging and presentation play a vital role in making a property stand out. Sellers should declutter, depersonalize, and arrange furniture to highlight the home's best features. Professional staging can create an inviting atmosphere that appeals to buyers.

Curb Appeal Enhancement

Enhancing curb appeal is essential to make a positive first impression. Simple improvements such as landscaping, fresh paint, and clean exteriors can significantly boost a property's attractiveness and attract more potential buyers.

Effective Marketing Strategies

Online Listings and Virtual Tours

Effective marketing strategies include online listings and virtual tours to reach a wider audience. High-quality photos, detailed descriptions, and virtual tours allow buyers to explore the property from the comfort of their homes.

Utilizing Social Media

Utilizing social media platforms for marketing can increase visibility and engagement. Sellers should leverage platforms like Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn to showcase their property, share updates, and connect with potential buyers.

Traditional Marketing Methods

Traditional marketing methods such as open houses, print advertisements, and direct mail campaigns still play a role in reaching local buyers. A balanced approach that combines online and traditional methods can maximize exposure and attract diverse audiences.

Navigating the Sales Process

Setting the Right Price

Setting the right price is crucial for a successful sale. Sellers should work with their real estate agent to conduct a comparative market analysis and determine a competitive price that reflects the property's value and market conditions.

Negotiation Tips

Negotiation is a key aspect of the sales process. Sellers should be prepared to negotiate with buyers on price, terms, and conditions. A skilled agent can assist in negotiating the best possible deal while ensuring that the seller's interests are protected.

Closing the Deal

Closing the deal involves finalizing all necessary paperwork, inspections, and financial arrangements. Sellers should ensure that all contractual obligations are met and that the transaction proceeds smoothly to a successful closing.

Future Trends in Real Estate Eaglemont Melbourne

Emerging Market Trends

Technology Integration

Technology integration is transforming the real estate market. Innovations such as smart homes, automation, virtual reality tours, and online marketplaces are enhancing the buying and selling experience, making it more efficient and convenient for all parties involved.

Sustainable Living

Sustainable living is becoming increasingly important in real estate. Green building practices, energy-efficient homes, and eco-friendly community initiatives are gaining traction, appealing to environmentally conscious buyers and contributing to a sustainable future.

Changing Buyer Preferences

Buyer preferences are evolving, with increasing demand for open spaces, home office requirements, and flexible living arrangements. The real estate market is adapting to these changes by offering properties that cater to these new preferences and lifestyles.

Government Policies and Their Impact

Zoning Regulations

Understanding local zoning laws and recent changes is essential for buyers and investors. Zoning regulations impact property use, development potential, and market trends, influencing investment decisions and property values.

Housing Affordability Initiatives

Government support programs and affordable housing projects are addressing housing affordability issues. These initiatives aim to provide accessible housing options for diverse populations, impacting market dynamics and investment opportunities.

Infrastructure Developments

Infrastructure developments such as new transportation projects and community facility enhancements play a significant role in shaping the real estate market. These developments improve accessibility, convenience, and quality of life, attracting buyers and investors to the area.

Expert Predictions for Eaglemont’s Real Estate Market

Market Stability and Growth

Experts predict that Eaglemont's real estate market will continue to experience stability and growth. The suburb's unique appeal, strong demand, and ongoing development contribute to its market resilience and long-term investment potential.

Innovative Real Estate Solutions

Innovative real estate solutions such as PropTech innovations, new approaches to property management, and the future of real estate transactions are transforming the industry. These advancements are streamlining processes, enhancing efficiency, and providing new opportunities for buyers and sellers.

Adapting to Market Changes

Adapting to market changes is essential for buyers and sellers to stay ahead in a competitive market. Strategies for success include staying informed about industry trends, leveraging professional guidance, and being flexible and responsive to evolving market conditions.

Conclusion: Embracing Real Estate Opportunities in Eaglemont Melbourne

Recap of Key Points

Eaglemont offers a unique blend of historical charm, modern amenities, and a vibrant community, making it an attractive destination for real estate investment. The suburb's strong property market, prime location, high quality of life, and diverse real estate opportunities contribute to its appeal and long-term investment potential.

Final Thoughts and Encouragement

Embracing the charm of Eaglemont and making informed real estate decisions can lead to successful and rewarding investments. Engaging with professional real estate services and staying informed about market trends and opportunities is essential for navigating the real estate market effectively.

Call to Action

Explore real estate listings in Eaglemont Melbourne, contact a local real estate agent for personalized guidance, and stay informed with the latest market updates to make the most of your real estate investment opportunities in this charming and desirable suburb.

[dongklak-mania]

Unleashing Adventure: Conquering Mount Merapi's Slopes at KAMPOENG MAHONI with ATV

Exploring the Enchantment of KAMPOENG MAHONI

Nestled amidst the majestic Mount Merapi's foothills, KAMPOENG MAHONI beckons to adventurers and nature enthusiasts seeking unparalleled experiences. Upon arrival, embrace the verdant surroundings, crisp mountain air, and the anticipation of an unforgettable journey ahead.

Thrills on Wheels: ATV Adventures

A standout feature of a KAMPOENG MAHONI expedition is the chance to pilot an ATV across Mount Merapi's rugged landscape. Gear up, ignite your engine, and brace yourself for an adrenaline-fueled odyssey along winding trails, rocky paths, and scenic vantage points that showcase nature's magnificence.

Nature's Embrace

Traversing Mount Merapi's slopes on your trusty ATV, immerse yourself in the unadulterated beauty of Indonesia's countryside. From lush valleys and cascading waterfalls to awe-inspiring views of the grand volcano, each twist and turn of your ATV venture unveils a new facet of this breathtaking panorama.

Memories in the Making

Whether you're a seasoned ATV enthusiast or a novice seeker of thrills, the memories forged at KAMPOENG MAHONI will linger long after the dust settles. The exhilaration of freedom, the adrenaline rush, and the majesty of nature's creations will etch indelible memories that will stand the test of time.

Chart Your Course

Ready to dive into your own ATV odyssey at KAMPOENG MAHONI? Ensure your spot by making early reservations, as this coveted destination often fills up swiftly, especially during peak travel periods. Whether you're venturing solo, with companions, or with family, KAMPOENG MAHONI offers an all-encompassing experience for everyone.

In Summation

To summarize, a sojourn to KAMPOENG MAHONI for an ATV escapade on Mount Merapi's slopes is an unparalleled adventure. From the heart-pounding excitement of conquering challenging paths to the tranquil allure of nature's embrace, every moment spent at this captivating locale promises enduring memories. Pack your spirit of adventure and prepare to uncover the wonders of Mount Merapi in a manner that will redefine your perception of exploration.

[kampoeng-mahoni]

Travel Experience at KAMPOENG MAHONI Exploring the Slopes of Mount Merapi Yogyakarta, Indonesia with ATV

Are you ready for an adventure of a lifetime? Imagine the thrill of exploring the breathtaking landscapes of Mount Merapi in Yogyakarta, Indonesia, while riding an ATV. Welcome to KAMPOENG MAHONI, where the spirit of adventure meets the beauty of nature in a truly exhilarating experience.

Discovering KAMPOENG MAHONI

Nestled on the foothills of the iconic Mount Merapi, KAMPOENG MAHONI is a hidden gem waiting to be explored by thrill-seekers and nature lovers alike. As you arrive at this enchanting destination, you will be greeted by the lush greenery, fresh mountain air, and the promise of an unforgettable adventure.

The Thrill of ATV Riding

One of the highlights of visiting KAMPOENG MAHONI is the opportunity to ride an ATV through the rugged terrain of Mount Merapi. Strap on your helmet, rev up your engine, and prepare to embark on an adrenaline-pumping journey through winding trails, rocky paths, and scenic viewpoints that will leave you in awe of the natural beauty surrounding you.

Immerse Yourself in Nature

As you navigate the slopes of Mount Merapi on your ATV, you will have the chance to witness the raw beauty of the Indonesian countryside up close. From verdant valleys and cascading waterfalls to panoramic views of the majestic volcano, every twist and turn of your ATV adventure will reveal a new and captivating aspect of this breathtaking landscape.

Unforgettable Memories

Whether you are an experienced ATV rider or a first-time adventurer, the experience of exploring KAMPOENG MAHONI will stay with you long after the dust has settled. The sense of freedom, the rush of adrenaline, and the sheer wonder of nature's grandeur will leave you with memories that will last a lifetime.

Plan Your Adventure

Ready to embark on your own thrilling ATV adventure at KAMPOENG MAHONI? Be sure to make your reservations in advance, as this popular destination tends to book up quickly, especially during peak travel seasons. Whether you are traveling solo, with friends, or as a family, there is something for everyone to enjoy at this one-of-a-kind destination.

Conclusion

In conclusion, a visit to KAMPOENG MAHONI for an ATV adventure on the slopes of Mount Merapi is an experience like no other. From the adrenaline-pumping thrill of riding through challenging terrain to the serene beauty of nature that surrounds you, every moment spent at this enchanting destination is sure to leave you with memories that will last a lifetime. So pack your sense of adventure and get ready to explore the wonders of Mount Merapi in a way you never thought possible.

[newmusicweekly]

Irish Rockers Colm O’Mahony & The Hot Touches Go From The Lap of the Gods to the Back of the Pub with Hard Driving Debut Single “Damage”

Emerging Irish Rockers Colm O’Mahony & The Hot Touches present their debut single “Damage”, available Fri. April 19th, 2024 on Spotify and all the major music services, with a companion video on YouTube. The full album is out soon. WATCH VIDEO ON YOUTUBE Sometime in-between bouts of getting roughed-up by his older brothers for sneaking into their rooms and playing their records, singer-songwriter Colm O'Mahony saw Queen's historic performance at Live Aid in July of 1985. At the ripe old age of 4. You could say his fate was sealed on the spot. "I can't remember the 1986 World Cup," says Mahony, "but I can remember Live Aid. I remember it was a hot day, and the way my brothers were just talking about it and talking about it. And, of course, I remember Freddie Mercury." Helplessly drawn to the rock and pop hits that dominated the radio at the time, O'Mahony continued to defy his older brothers and cop listens from their record collections, slowly developing his own tastes in the process. "I had to travel quite far to buy actual records and tapes," he recalls, "so the bulk of my tastes were shaped by the radio — songs by people like Tom Petty and Bob Seger, who were so effortless that they made songwriting seem like the most natural thing. And with Petty, for example, you would really go somewhere while listening to one of his songs. It also had a really big impact when I discovered Irish artists like Luke Kelly & The Dubliners, Paddy Reilly, Liam Clancy, and Bagatelle. Read the full article

[mluleki2]

Reflection on what I've have learnt about client-centered practice.

Client-centered practice in occupational therapy is an approach that places the client at the center of care, focusing on their individual needs, goals, and preferences. It emphasizes collaboration between the therapist and client, with the therapist acting as a facilitator to help the client achieve their goals.

"Client-orientated role evaluation focuses on the assessment of occupational performance tasks: ADL, instrumental ADL, work, and play-leisure ( Procedures for Practice 8-2). Because tasks, activities, and their contexts are unique to each role of each person, a client-centered assessment tool such as the Canadian Occupational Performance Measure(COPM) (Law et al., 1998) is recommended. It was designed to measure a client’s perception of his or her occupational performance over time. A semi-structured interview is used to administer the COPM. First, clients are asked to identify problem areas in self-care, productivity, and leisure. Second, the client rates the importance of each problem area. Third, clients rate their own performance and their satisfaction with the performance."

This practice helped me a lot with the planning and implementation of client-centered intervention for my client who has a head injury and left upper limb radial fracture with ORIF since our main goal with the client was to improve his left-hand participation in occupations like it used to pre-injury. So my prioritized aims worked toward improving the affected client factors that cause occupational imbalance, the client gave me the tasks, roles, routines, and occupations he used to do which involved that limb then from that I was able to plan for different activities and implementing them as a part of intervention on the therapeutic goals set for the client.

What is the importance of feedback received from supervisors and literature/research about the patient aids in your OT intervention plan and implementation towards treatment goals?

"According to Beasley (2011), student learning outcomes (SLOs) are statements describing the knowledge, skills, attitudes, behaviors or values that students should be able to demonstrate at the end of their program of study. This means that assessing students’ learning outcomes will let us evaluate the efficiency and productivity of the whole educational process"

The feedback from the supervisors has helped me a lot in understanding my SWOT analysis and made me improve in some of the weaknesses where I struggled on during my treatment program with the patient. Research-gathering techniques which include observations, interviews, collateral information, and literature review have helped me in seeing if there is progress in the client's life from the time I started seeing him to the present time and also it has helped me to better understand the patient's diagnosis better.

Client-centered practice has helped me a lot in terms of understanding my scope of practice of using mostly occupations as our main goal of treatment that is appropriate for that particular client. It has also helped me to firstly importance to understand the client better as an occupational being starting from his roles, routines, rituals, and habits on a day-to-day basis before and post-injury for me to now being able to use treatment plans that will provide meaningful meaning of life to a patient, and how the use of client-centered approach influence the client into participating in the occupation therapy treatment sessions.

References

1.Ann Poulos and Mary Jane Mahony. (2008). Effectiveness of feedback: the students’ perspective. Assessment & Evaluation in Higher Education, 143-154.

2.Antonija Mitrovic, Stellan Ohlsson and Devon K. Barrow. (2012). The Effect of Positive Feedback in a Constraint-Based Intelligent Tutoring System. Computers and Education, 264-272.

3. Epstein, R. M., & Street, R. L. (2007). Patient-centered communication in cancer care: Promoting healing and reducing suffering (NIH Publication No.07-6225). Bethesda, MD: National Cancer Institute.

[psychreviews2]

Case Studies: The ‘Wolfman’ – Sigmund Freud Pt. 3

On the cutting room floor

Being such important case studies, later analysts would unearth from them what Freud could not see in the early 20th century. Patrick Mahony analyzed some of what was missing in The Cries of the Wolf Man based on more current discoveries, just like he did in his huge review of the "Ratman." In those days, again, women were often not emphasized as much as men for their influence on a child's upbringing. "...Freud's paternalistic bias in his understanding of the case and the [minimization] of maternal transference appears in the odd statement that the father was Serge's 'first and most primitive object choice.' Finally, Freud's judgment of aggressive factors was wanting. He underplayed the hostile elements in the transference. Stressing sexual explanations, he neglected the essential connection between narcissism and aggression and the patient's identification with the aggressor; in particular, much of Serge's early [behaviour] was an identification with an aggressor, which is to be explained not merely as a reaction from passivity to activity but rather as a process whereby becoming the aggressor diminishes [low self-opinion], gratifies the self, and regains self-esteem...Sociologically we must be aware that because of the enormous wealth and aristocratic standing of Serge's family and attendantly because of its palatial mansion, it is of the greatest unlikelihood that the boy would have slept in his parents bedroom. We can hardly imagine that this reality was not brought up and discussed during the analysis, and yet Freud suppressed this in his reportage." Freud was also working through his own situation with homosexual libido at around that time with his split with Wilhelm Fliess. In a letter to Sandor Ferenczi Freud wrote that "a piece of homosexual investment has been withdrawn and utilized for the enlargement of my own ego. I have succeeded where the paranoiac fails." It was also known that Sigmund slept in his parents quarters and was more likely to witness his parents having sex rather than his patient.

Mahony further describes the improbability of the primal scene, and that the child with malaria was able to watch the parents having sex for a long period of time, even if he were only in the room once. The angle of seeing the genitals from the cot would also be improbable. "Apart from the fact that the primal scene may be absorbed into screen memories, the question remains as to whether the exposure to primal scenes must necessarily be traumatic or be interpreted as a sadomasochistic experience. The universality of incest taboos and the inevitability of unconscious guilt incurred in witnessing the primal scene and the child's possible rage and narcissistic injury are elements to be taken into account in any future answer. At any rate, Freud's focusing on direct instinctual overstimulation due to a single primal scene overlooked the possible trauma of more important factors: the pathology of earliest object relations; the psychobiological side effects of the nearly fatal pneumonia suffered at the age of three months; life threatening malaria and its sequelae in ego disturbance; and finally, what we now understand as the sensitivity of the rapproachement subphase of separation-individuation when language, secondary process, and gender identification are rapidly evolving and vulnerable." Here the rapproachment subphase he is talking about, is the age when the child has to start to feel comfortable doing some things on his or her own.

Like the mutual admiration society described earlier, prematurely believing in success can fool both the therapist and patient. Mahony adds that "[by bringing] their 'interplay of suggestion and compliance' to bear upon the so-called breakthrough at the end of the case, we see at another level the patient's submission to his insistent analyst, who all the while eagerly and self-deceptively believed that infantile material was being worked through. The forced termination gratified the Wolf Man's passive fantasies related to the primal scene and at the same time further entrenched him in a castration complex. There is a partial truth to the diagnostic account of the Wolf Man 'as having submitted in a feminine manner to Freud and as having produced a child for him - the wolf dream and its analysis - and thereby a cure in part through a misalliance and mutual inappropriate gratification. One might even speak of an '[invention] induced by interpretation whereby the dream, placed at the center of the treatment, became the object of an equal ardor and of reciprocal seduction.' In one sense the patient retreated to a second line of defense; his compliant false self gave Freud what he was looking for, with the result that the patient's infantile grandiosity remained untouched, a false-self maneuver which 'settled several critical dilemmas, and satisfied narcissism at both ends of the couch.'" Ironically, Freud was studying Narcissism at this time but all he saw was genital narcissistic masculinity rebelling against femininity.

A big possible miss comes from the former director of the Sigmund Freud Archives, after Kurt Eissler, Jeffrey Masson, who found unpublished material that could be of use to the case study. In his controversial The Assault on Truth, he was "asked...to go through the unpublished material...concerning the Wolf-Man, one of Freud’s most famous later patients. There I found some notes by Ruth Mack Brunswick for a paper she never published. At Freud’s request, she had re-analyzed the Wolf-Man and was astonished to learn that as a child he had been anally seduced by a member of his family—and that Freud did not know this. She never told him. Why? Did Freud not know because he did not want to know? And did Ruth Mack Brunswick not tell him because she sensed this?" His discovery unfortunately doesn't provide which family member it was and so it remains floating in the possibilities of interpretation. Was it a parent, a sibling, or a caretaker? Freud did acknowledge sexual abuse in childhood, but he focused more on frustrated wishes, precisely because not all victims end up with psychological problems after abuse. A more balanced view that looks at both abuse and frustrated wishes would help, and if Serge had that dealt with in the analysis with Freud, it certainly would have been more insightful.

In the end Mahony found Brunswick's analysis too timid to break with Freud's orthodox analysis. "Brunswick bore some similarity to her patient the Wolf Man, and one may wonder whether the overlap influenced Freud's decision on the referral. To complete this part of the story: during her prolonged stay in Vienna, her health deteriorated, prompting her to follow the dying Freud to London in 1938 to have further analysis with him. Imagine the desperate scene: now a recent widower, the succor-seeking Wolf Man rushing to London to see his analyst, who herself was frail and back in treatment with her own and her patient's former analyst." Mahony speculates that this could have been seen as a rejection to Serge because "in London the Wolf Man obtained relief from Brunswick but tried unsuccessfully to see Freud." Then with Freud's death, his wife's suicide, and Ruth's untimely death, he would eventually have to find others to rely on. By the time Serge was interviewing with Karin Obholzer, he was seeing Kurt Eissler and possibly Dr. Wilhelm Solms. Mahony researched the background to those interviews. "Pankejeff voiced endless resentment of others, including Eissler and Gardiner, who so generously sustained him materially and psychologically; meanwhile he was criticizing Obholzer to Eissler. This backbiting, atypical of the immortal patient, indicates another character change where senility had its say. But it is fitting to ask how much he was influenced by the anti-psychoanalytic interviews, if he spoke for himself, or even more to the point, did he ever speak for himself?"

Life after Freud

Despite the positive overtones of the Psychoanalysts, Psychoanalysis has always been under a lot of criticism, and Serge was the longest living patient of Freud's. He would provide a lot of material to analyze after so many treatments. The last part of Serge's life until his death included continued communication with psychoanalysts and an interview with an agnostic journalist, Karin Obholzer. It was very interesting to see the two sides of the Wolfman case. From the point of view of a psychologically untrained journalist, Karin was able to see Serge without the lens of psychoanalysis and to be able to notice how little he changed for an average person. Any unknown biological sources of pathology would continue to manifest in front of her. Yet, from the point of view of psychoanalysts, they are the ones trained to treat patients and are able to see more depth than Karin was able to. It's very easy when reading these books to get emotional and take sides, because it's a human life in the balance. Karin would not be able to analyze Serge's defenses and break through them. She had to take him at his word. Psychoanalysis would develop into different traditions, including Object-Relations and Self-Psychology. Reviews of later psychoanalysts could see what Freud did right and wrong and add further understanding from more recent clinical observations. After all these years of treatment, how much improvement should Serge have noticed? Also, at his advanced age of 86, how much would he remember for an interview? 

Serge's late views on Freud and Psychoanalysis

Despite all that help from Freud and other Psychoanalysts, Serge remained skeptical at the end of his life. "Freud was a genius, there's no denying it! All those ideas that he combined in a system...Even though much isn't true, it was a splendid achievement." One of the interesting sticking points for Serge was the endless debate about choice and determinism. Even though Freud was mostly of the opinion of determinism, he still talked about choice. "Freud said that when one has gone through psychoanalysis, one can become well. But one must also want to become well. It's like a ticket one buys. The ticket gives one the possibility to travel. But I am not obliged to travel. It depends on...my decision." The difficulty for therapists is how to generate desire in people to change, and certainly Freud and others tried. "He had very serious eyes that looked down to the very bottom of the soul. His whole appearance was very appealing. I felt sympathy for him. That was transference. He had a magnetism or, better, an aura that was very pleasant and positive. When I told him about my various states, he said: 'We have the means to cure what you are suffering from'...He said 'Treatment means that you have to say everything that occurs to you'...He must have thought that the important things are in the subconscious and that they emerge through free association." Freud warned him not to rationalize the material. The patient had to trust the the analyst. "That's how he succeeded in bringing about a total transference to himself. Is that a good thing, do you suppose? That's the question. Too strong a transference ends with your transferring to individuals who replace Freud, as it were, and with your believing them uncritically. And that happened to me, to a degree. So transference is a dangerous thing....Basically [hypnosis and transference] are similar. I can remember Freud saying 'Hypnosis, what do you mean, hypnosis, everything we do is hypnosis too.'"

Serge went on explaining how he "worshiped" Freud and how Freud was a replacement to a disappointing father who preferred his sister instead. When his father died, Freud would be able to use a much stronger transference in therapy, and suggestions would be much easier to be adopted. Serge then talked about the difficulty of affording treatment, and how psychology is much better than it used to be. His big concern about psychotherapy was the false promise of happiness after an analysis, and the unexpected dependence on analysts. "The analyst puts the patient back into his childhood. And he experiences everything as a child. But that doesn't mean that the suffering has to pass. That's the important question: Must it pass when one remembers something? This question has not really been answered...The disciples of psychoanalysis should have not laid hold of me after Freud.

O: You mean they should have left you alone?

W: Yes, because I would have acted more independently...That is the danger of psychoanalysis, that one is dependent on the decisions of others who are not competent and knowledgeable but who believe that they know everything and can guide one just because they are psychoanalysts...Freud was so anti-religious [but] he and all of psychoanalysis are being blamed for the very thing for which he blamed religion, that it's nothing but a faith...But psychoanalysis is complicated. Who can make definitive and official statements? The effect was salutary, in any event. But it was not a complete cure.

O: And do you still believe in psychoanalysis?

W: I no longer believe in anything.

O: Nothing at all?

W: All right, I believe in transference. I am of the opinion, of course, that improvement can be made by transference.

O: Today, they also concern themselves with the family or with the couple if that's what it is.

W: That's the way it should be, of course. [They] must also deal with Therese and not say, that isn't my patient.

[But] I never thought much of dream interpretation, you know...Freud traces everything back to the primal scene which he derives from the dream. But that scene does not occur in the dream...That scene in the dream where the windows open and so on and the wolves are sitting there, and his interpretation, I don't know, those things are miles apart. It's terribly farfetched.

O: But it's true that you did have that dream.

W: Yes, it is...I prefer free association because there, something can occur to you. But that primal scene is no more than a construct...The whole thing is improbable because in Russia, children sleep in the nanny's bedroom, not in their parents'. It's possible, of course, that there was an exception, how do I know? But I have never been able to remember anything of that sort...If one...concludes from effects to cause, it's the same thing as circumstantial evidence in a trial.

O: What about the obsessional neurosis now?

W: I believe you are born with something like that, there's nothing one can do about it.

O: Freud writes that your illness erupted because you got the clap [Gonorrhea].

W: That we have to talk about these unpleasant things!

O: What's so terrible? It can happen to anyone. Perhaps it will console you when I tell you that I had the clap myself.

W: I am amazed you should tell me. You really seem to trust me!...I had a friend, and this friend had an older friend who arranged it. There was a café with three girls in it. And this friend knew that these girls were [waitresses] in that café and that they could also be put to a different use...And they also had a room...

O: How old were you at the time?

W: Seventeen.

O: Was that your first sexual experience?

W: Yes. In any event, we went and I asked the friend - you'll have to excuse my telling you these terrible things - whether one should use a prophylatic or not. And he answered, 'The whore will laugh at you.' So we didn't take any long. And then, by way of a joke, he said that there's a superstition that the name of the first woman with whom one has sexual intercourse will also be the name of the woman one marries. And that was true in our case. Her name was Maria, I remember, and my wife's name was actually Maria Therese. So it was true.

O: The gonorrhea came later?

W: Yes, later. I got it from a peasant girl. That was a year later. I felt confident; I thought, that can't happen in the country. People always said that it was risky to go to prostitutes. And out in the country it is less dangerous. The opposite turned out to be true.

O: And you gave the peasant girl money, or were you in love?

W: No, no, you always gave something, that was a matter of good manners.

O: What did you tell Freud you were suffering from?

W: Well depressions...it was because of Therese...Everyone was against Therese: the doctors, my mother, my relatives. They all said that she was a woman with whom one could not live. Had I decided to go see Therese, things might have been alright without Freud.

O: What was the attitude toward masturbation?

W: Well, my God, people said that one became insane, that it is very dangerous, that it's harmful. And when I saw Freud, he said, 'Well, that's an exaggeration. It isn't that serious.'

O: Did Freud advocate masturbation?

W: No, no, that's putting it too strongly. He viewed it as harmless.

O: [Ruth] writes that you said, 'Of course, I only masturbated regularly on the big holidays.'

W: What she wrote there is stupid. It's absurd.

O: Why? What if you did?

W: When I was seeing her, I was with Therese. I had no need to masturbate.

O: There are people who masturbate nonetheless.

W: But that's primarily young people who haven't had the courage to go to a woman or haven't had the opportunity.

O: One also finds it among couples. It isn't that unusual.

O: Did you ever have real homosexual relations?

W: Of course not, never. But since you bring it up, I happen to remember something. In Russia, the Armenians were known as homosexuals. I was told when one went to a bathhouse in the Caucasus, they asked, do you want a woman or a boy? When I was a student in Odessa, there was an Armenian. His name was Murato. He was a good-looking person but had disquieting eyes. Very strange eyes. That was what was so beautiful about him. There was a small group of us students, and this Murato was one of us. Once, he said to me, 'You know, after the performance, we are all visiting S. P. That was an actor in Odessa who was a known homosexual...Murato said, 'We are all going to see S.P.' I knew right away what he meant. One day, I was at the university to attend a lecture. All the seats were taken except for one next to this Murato. I sat down there. Suddenly, he takes my hand and starts pressing it. That was supposed to be a test. I immediately distanced myself...I had a second experience...I was going to Paris, there was another gentleman in the compartment. I stretched out and fell asleep in the corner by the window. Then he stepped up to the window and placed his foot close to mine. I didn't know what to do, should I push his foot away? So I pretended to sleep. Then he played with my knee, but finally he stopped. He wanted to see how I would react.

O: Freud writes about your homosexual tendencies...

W: Subconscious, of course. For Freud, all relations between men are homosexual.

O: It's probably true that every human being is naturally bisexual.

W: But homosexuals are relatively rare.

O: The educational barriers are very strong...Freud says somewhere that you preferred a certain position during intercourse, the one from behind...that you enjoyed it less in other positions.

W: But that also depends on the woman, how she is built. There are women where it is only possible from the front. That's happened to me. It depends on whether the vagina is more toward the front or toward the rear...With Therese...the first coitus was that she sat on top of me."

O: [Quoting Ernest Jones here]: 'From the age of six he had suffered from obsessive blasphemies against the Almighty, and he initiated the first hour of treatment with the offer to have rectal intercourse with Freud and then to defecate on his head.'

W: For heaven's sake, what nonsense! To write something like that, I don't know, is that fellow crazy or what, writing such nonsense. He explained it to me, he sits at the head end rather than at the foot of the bed because there was a female patient who wanted to seduce him, and she kept raising her skirt...That fellow must have a screw loose."

The quote Obholzer referred to was from Ernest Jones who took the situation too literally. Thankfully Mahony referenced the original letter from Freud writing to Sandor Ferenczi about a transference insult he received from Serge: "A rich young Russian whom I have taken on because of compulsive falling in love, confessed to me, after the first session, the following transference: Jewish swindler, he would like to use me from behind and shit on my head." Whether Serge forgot the transference or it never happened, at his age during the interview it's hard to verify. Certainly it's possible there was an anal obsession with Freud doing the analysis. At this point it's good to bring in more modern understandings of obsession and homosexuality. 

Homosexual OCD

A lot of conflict between people regarding sexuality is based on phobias and compulsive thoughts. When someone looks at someone else, they don't only look, the brain assesses imitatively if it identifies with the pleasure that person looks for. People forget that their desire or distaste is their own. For those who obsess, compulsions can happen just from looking at someone or thinking about content that adds to obsession. Freud in particular is a psychoanalyst that talks a lot about obsession and homosexuality. When obsession goes to an extreme it turns into what modern therapists call Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD). Certainly with so much emphasis on sexuality and sexual orientation in Freud's insights, it's easy for people to obsess about how they dress, how they hold themselves and think "is that unconsciously gay?" Phobias and stereotypes can easily develop if you are constantly looking for signs. The human mind has many parts to it and it's capable of imitating emotions of others, just like you see in TV shows, movies, and even singing Karaoke and singing along in concerts are great examples of mimetics. You can imitate being the singer and it creates some emotions of validation, and identity, but this short-term imitation, that can turn into an obsession, is shallow compared to being the actual person. There are more piano notes to being in a long-term homosexual relationship where you are in love with your partner and desire to have regular sex with them, but where you also have deep intimate conversations and long-term joint projects. People can be confused by imitation, identification and compulsions to act. With OCD, the intrusive thoughts are very powerful. It may seem funny to many people, but it actually affects a lot of people, and if they can't get out of their thoughts/images and into the sensations of their body, they can have doubts about their sexual orientation for long periods of time. 

Monnica Williams did an excellent review of this type of OCD. In general, with OCD..."compulsions are repetitive, ritualized behaviors that the person feels driven to perform to alleviate the anxiety of the obsessions. Depending on the severity of the disorder, the compulsive rituals can occupy many hours each day...A recent study using a broad sample of OCD patients found that 25% experienced sexual obsessions currently or in the past. Sexual obsessions may revolve around a multitude of loci. Common themes include unfaithfulness, incest, pedophilia, unusual behaviors, AIDS, profane thoughts combining religion and sex, and, of course, homosexuality. Since sex carries so much emotional, moral, and religious importance, it easily becomes a magnet for obsessions in people predisposed to OCD....Homosexual anxiety is described here as the obsessive fear of being or becoming homosexual, the experience of intrusive, unwanted mental images of homosexual behavior, and/or the obsessive fear that others may believe one is homosexual. A person may have only one of these facets of the disorder or any combination. Since OCD is characterized by doubt, the person with OCD will contemplate the uncomfortable thoughts or images, agonize over the meaning of the questions that arise, determine possible answers, and then doubt the answers. The person will continually seek evidence to help arrive at a decision, perform compulsive rituals to ward off anxiety, ask others for reassurance, and/or avoid things or situations that worsen the anxiety. At times the person will realize that the fears are extreme but at other times the concerns may seem perfectly rational...People with HOCD may engage in a multitude of checking behaviors and avoidances. They may avoid watching television out of concern that seeing a show with a gay character might trigger the obsessions, causing a 'spike,' or surge of anxious thoughts. Others might look at pornographic images of homosexual couples and repeatedly assess whether they feel aroused, or even compare their responses to when they look at heterosexual images. Many people with homosexuality fears worry about a sudden lack of attraction to others of the opposite sex. They may attempt to have intercourse with their partner or masturbate to pornography just to ensure that they are 'still straight.' This form of checking is particularly destructive because the anxiety from the OCD typically results in decreased sex drive and/or an inability to perform, which the patient then misinterprets as further evidence of homosexuality. People with HOCD will often solicit reassurance from others then feel temporarily relieved, but the doubts always return. No amount of reassurance is ever enough because complete certainty cannot be obtained. Even though the person may be diagnosed with OCD, until they are treated they often will doubt the diagnosis...Homosexuality anxiety is not caused by dislike of homosexuals, but rather a fear that the person will no longer have access to the opposite sex, something they highly value."

An example of how extreme it can get is an OCD patient Monnica describes. "I have been diagnosed with OCD for a while now. The therapist I was seeing told me that I should try to be with a man, and that everybody is bisexual. It really freaked me out, and I was suicidal for five months thanks to what she said. The thoughts grew even stronger. Eventually, I couldn’t be with any person of the same sex alone in the same room, watch TV, read the newspaper, or listen to music with male voices." So this is important for Freudian psychoanalysts who are comfortable with bisexuality, but their patients are not, and also have OCD, especially if they are undiagnosed. Another example is of a 20 year old male masturbating to see which pornography creates the largest pleasure. "I’m struggling with these bloody urges, and I can’t stand it any more. It keeps saying, “You want it,” [obsession] and eventually I say, “Fine,” and I just masturbate to things I hate [compulsion]. It does a little bit for me, but I’m pretty sure that’s the stimulation and not the content. But then as soon as I think of a girl [compulsion], boom, I finish, and I know I am straight. But how am I supposed to get these thoughts out of my head? These urges feel real. I don’t like this. I don’t want to be gay at all. It’s a scary thought that I'd have to spend the rest of my life with a guy [obsession]. I can’t handle that, but something keeps telling me that’s what I want [obsession], even though in reality that’s disgusting to me. OCD is so confusing isn’t it?"

Of course this doesn't only affect men. "This is all started about two years ago, with obsessions about being gay. Over the past several months my thoughts have been insane. I can't do anything without freaking out that it is a sign [obsession]. I am in the medical profession. If I have to do an...exam, and a girl is skinny (and of course I'm jealous), I get visuals that I don't want. If a couple comes in and the husband is ugly, but the wife is pretty and thin, I think, 'Oh my God, I would rather be with the wife than the husband [obsession].' Then I try to picture myself years down the road [compulsion], and I can't see who I am with – a man or a woman. I feel like I have become obsessed with the female body, which could either be due to my horrendous self-esteem or that I'm really gay. I used to be obsessed with the male body and always talking about how hot this guy was or that guy, and now I feel like I can't do that anymore. These thoughts are shifting my entire outlook on who I want to be with. I have been dating someone for the past seven months, and he is aware of what has been going on. He tries to help, but doesn't really know how. It seems like it has gotten progressively worse since I have started dating him. In the beginning, sex was awesome, and now it's all I can do to make it through sex without crying because I feel like I'm going insane. And at times I feel so full of sadness and depression, that I forget how much I love (or think I love) [obsession] my boyfriend."

Like with most OCD, the treatments involve tackling the logic of obsessive thoughts. "I realized that when the phrase 'You're gay' popped into my head I was telling myself the following: (1) You are inferior to other men, (2) You are effeminate, (3) You are a sissy, (4) No woman would be interested in you. When I saw the lies in these statements, I said to myself, 'You know what, even if I am gay this distorted belief system is a problem and needs to be fixed.' Once I saw the lie, it was like a fog lifted, and the horrible depression disappeared instantly. I thought this was really too good to be true so I called my therapist. She told me that, yes, once you realize the distortions in some of your thoughts your mood can change instantly. It was unbelievable."

Fred Penzel, from the International OCD Foundation, provides some tips for resisting checking behaviour. "Not checking your reactions to attractive members of your own sex. Not imagining yourself in sexual situations with same-sex individuals to check on your own reactions. Not behaving sexually with members of the opposite sex just to check your own reactions. Resist reviewing previous situations where you were with members of the same or opposite sex, or where things were ambiguous to see if you did anything questionable. Avoid observing yourself to see if you behaved in a way you imagine a homosexual or member of the opposite sex would." The problem with checking behaviour is that it can become addictive because of the relief. Yet the relief doesn't last because doubts keep returning because it's hard to be absolute about fuzzy areas like sexual orientation, and certainly having other non-professionals suggest your orientation is to give them too much power. One has to develop skepticism of people who rattle off suggestions that "your clothes are gay, your interests are gay, you saw gay pornography, that means you're gay, you had thoughts about being gay, then you're gay." You can reverse it to see how unscientific those suggestions are. "Your clothes are straight, your interests are straight, you saw straight pornography, that means you're straight, you had thoughts about being straight, then you're straight." Another area of healing can come from exposure therapy, where you actually entertain more ideas of homosexuality to face your phobias. Now this isn't a checking obsession, these are actually attempts to learn. Depending on how serious the compulsions are, a patient has to be ready to deal with the anxiety. This includes..."reading books by or about gay persons. Watching videos on gay themes or about gay characters. Visiting gay meetings shops, browsing in gay bookstores, or visiting areas of town that are more predominantly gay. Wearing a T-shirt at home with the word ‘gay’ on it. Wearing clothes in fit, color, or style that could possibly look effeminate for a man or masculine for a woman...[Read] about people who are sexually confused. Reading about people who are transgendered. Looking at pictures of people who are transgendered or are transvestites."

As an aside, on the checking behaviour with pornography, people need to be aware of how much disgust towards any sex is held back in things like pornography. Just like in advertising, all undesirable details are removed, or participants act as if undesirable details are desirable to get the brain to imitate. As long as participants look like they're having a good time, the brain wants to imitate pleasure. This habit can sneak into areas that require more authenticity. Long-term sexual relationships require a lot of love, caring, and concern. Most of these things are missing from pornography. The relationship template the brain is learning from in pornography is based on what's left out. This isn't to bash pornography but much of it leaves out long-term relationships, envy, jealousy, STIs, and relationship skills. Lust also gets boring. What is attractive at the beginning in a relationship can become quite boring after a certain amount of time. Long-term relationships have passion, love and interest that doesn't fizzle as easily. Having gay or lesbian sex without the human connection that goes beyond a sexual connection is too superficial to be full sexual orientation. Pornography is not a good example for people to decide what their sexual orientation is. At most it can help condition an appreciation of the same sex in terms of lust, but it doesn't condition romantic love and relationship skills because those things are absent in most pornography. The piano notes of a loving long-term relationship have a lot more variety than sex addiction, and like any addiction, overemphasizing one note is all about short-term quick relief to regulate the emotions, just like alcohol and other substances. If boredom rules addiction and it requires more novelty and intensity then in the example of relationships, long-term relationships would be boring and partners would have to be exchanged constantly. What people with different sexual orientations are fighting for in claiming equal rights is much more than just sex. 

Outside of sexual orientation, a person has to look beyond needing a response from society or authority figures to bless a relationship, and one has to get to a point as if you and your partner are on your own, making your own decisions, without needing validation from others and to be able to feel relaxed, comfortable and happy. This is actually a difficult thing to do. To look at actual relationships and actual objects for their actual value, without needing validation, and agreement from others is an advanced level of intrinsic motivation. Many people want what they want and demand that everyone agree with them, even if opinions from others are irrelevant. A lot of the high people get is on social validation and it can distort any individual's decision making strategies, and is a huge source of conflict internally and externally. People want you to agree with their religion, philosophy, sexual orientation, and cultural habits. Rewards and punishments constantly steer the mind away from authentic choices. To mind your own business and live your own life actually takes a lot of courage, but the reward is psychological freedom and independence.

Horace Frink & Proto-conversion therapy

Of course this mistake of needing help from authority figures to work out sexual orientation also happened in Freud's time and he was also implicated in those mistakes. Serge wasn't the only one that became a ward of psychoanalysis, and this can happen in any modality where the therapist receives a parental transference respect from the patient. Freud over emphasized unconscious homosexuality in a way that helped but he was too omnipotent to understand how unbending many sexual orientations are. He eventually figured it out, but it didn't start off that way. The Frink Fiasco was almost as bad as what happened with Emma Eckstein. [See: Dreams: https://rumble.com/v1gtf6j-dreams-sigmund-freud.html] Horace Frink was a former analysand of Freud's and he impressed him enough to have Horace selected as Freud representative in America. Frink was having an affair with the banking heiress Angelika Bijur, and Freud suggested that Frink was in love with her and should divorce his wife, which he had two children with. After the divorces and the new marriage to Bijur, Frink's mental health deteriorated with feelings of guilt. His depression and anger increased with accusations that his new wife was ugly and looked like a man or a pig. Freud responded "Your idea Mrs. Bijur had lost part of her beauty may be turned into her having lost part of her money. Your complaint that you cannot grasp your homosexuality implies that you are not yet aware of your fantasy of making me a rich man. Let us change this imaginary gift into a real contribution to the Psychoanalytic Funds." Freud was in the dangerous position that most psychologists face, which is how to make money and follow ethics. The pressure to have famous successful cases pushes people to take short-cuts, and is always an influence therapists have to ignore to protect their patients. Frink himself was now stuck analyzing patients for the needed money, even as he started losing faith in psychoanalysis. His ongoing fights with Angelika resorted to blows and she filed for divorce. Freud was forced into having to dismiss Frink from leadership in America, and it turned into a resentment that Freud had against his followers in the United States. Frink continued to deteriorate, including two suicide attempts, leading to an admission in a sanatorium. Now on Freud's side, he wasn't responsible for Frink's affairs, but psychological suggestions are dangerous, partly because it's actually hard to be a therapist and avoid suggestions, but this is also compounded when important individuals in family relationships are left out of the analysis. Angelika's ex-husband Abraham asserted himself in a letter to Freud that should be an example to all therapists who should think before they offer any suggestions, especially match-making suggestions. "Dr Freud: Two patients presented themselves to you and made it clear that on your judgment depended whether they had a right to marry. The man is bound in honour by the ethics of his profession not to take advantage of his confidential position toward his patients. The woman was his patient. The woman is my wife. How can you know you are just to me: how can you give a judgment that ruins a man's home and happiness, without at least knowing the victim, so as to see if he is worthy of the punishment, or if through him a better solution cannot be found? Great Doctor, are you savant or charlatan?"

This is just as much a problem today as it was then. Going back to the concern of the 'Ratman' Ernst Lanzer, Patrick Mahony said "it was years later [than his analysis] before Freud fully realized that the uncovering of guilt could lead to the negative therapeutic effect of worsening a patient's condition." This is a great example for budding therapists to study before they start the profession. Blame, as is known in the court system, can be accurate, but it also can conflate all the problems that a person has onto a scapegoat and therapists can be scapegoated. Both the therapist and the patient have to take on their own responsibilities for making decisions. Patients need to find second opinions, and if they are capable of agency, they should be doing their own research. The challenge for therapists is to make sure the client knows that psychology is not a magic wand that will make you rich and find the perfect spouse. Psychologists are not experts in every field of life, and suggestions outside of their expertise must be looked at with skepticism. Many things are uncertain, and in a world where people glorify intuition, it can be as dangerous as a random guess. Daniel Kahneman describes when intuition works best "We have seen that reliably skilled intuitions are likely to develop when the individual operates in a high-validity environment and has an opportunity to learn the rules of that environment. These conditions often remain unmet in professional contexts, either because the environment is insufficiently predictable or because of the absence of opportunities to learn its rules." What this basically says is that you can only trust intuition when you know a lot about something. The best attitude to have in therapy is to be skeptical of all intuitions until the patient's family and friends are understood very well. Even then, there will be mistakes, so an emphasis that people have to take responsibility for themselves instead of relying on their psychologist like they are a child dependent and the therapist is a parent, must be communicated to the patient. The patient needs to inform themselves and read different points of view, and if they are capable of learning a lot about reality, and the different scientific disciplines, then they can be independent minded enough to make their own decisions, and hopefully, if their problem is not genetic or biological, they can let go of dependence on a saviour therapist. For most therapists, success is when the patient doesn't need to come back, and the ex-patient now cherishes their own research and decision making skills. 

Why so few talented therapists treat clients with challenging disorders - Marsha Linehan: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5mTLFfCQyY

Bisexual erasure and psychological templates

Jonathan Barrett from the University of Nevada, did a good review of early conversion therapy philosophies in Psychoanalysis and how it's toxicity split off into the United States. Freud eventually learned that “It is not for psychoanalysis to solve the problem of homosexuality...one must remember that in normal sexuality also there is a limitation in the choice of object; in general to undertake to convert a fully developed homosexual into a heterosexual is not much more promising than to do the reverse, only that for good practical reasons the latter is never attempted." Here he suggests that object choices are made early in life and they are very persistent throughout life. By the time someone is an adult and a patient, unless there is some intensity and pleasure with either object choice, a conversion therapist is in the position of trying to make someone straight when there isn't enough pleasure already there to support it, and maybe even disgust towards the opposite sex. Another pitfall is bisexual erasure, where again labels are used to block possible experiences. Labels can be useful, but not if they repress real object choices. The actor Alan Cumming provided a warning that repression can go in many different ways. “I see a worrying trend among LGBT people, that if you identify yourself in just one way, you close yourself off to other experiences. My sexuality has never been black and white; it’s always been gray. I’m with a man, but I haven’t closed myself off to the fact that I’m still sexually attracted to women.” This statement is helpful for people who are in homosexual or heterosexual relationships, because they don't have to pretend they don't have other desires as well. Having those desires also doesn't mean people can't be in a committed relationship with one person. The typical mistake is labeling someone as homosexual or heterosexual when they are concurrently in those kind of relationships, as if they can't carry both desires in their mind at the same time. Accusations of bi-sexuals being greedy or cheaters can also be put to bed. Cheating can happen in any sexual orientation.

Alan Cumming fan page: http://www.alancumming.com/

Mel B and Ginger Spice: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7rqO-PjxQg

Geri Halliwell Mel B Lesbian affair: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGqhC4tejLA

Like in HOCD or in situations of internalized bigotry against homosexual desire in oneself, the brain can move into self-attacking, and that's what is the pathology. Self-hatred can inhibit at one degree but it can also become more severe with suicidal ideation. Real therapy is to accept desires in oneself without resorting to pathological self-recrimination. Ultimately you are not falling in love with a category, but an individual. More important relationship questions that are not to be overlooked are "am I in the cycle of abuse? Do I have a habitual template to be with abusive people? What is a good relationship?" What a successful relationship looks like, has more to do with relationship skills, and in places like the Gottman Institute, there are so many skills partners have to develop to achieve great long-lasting relationships. Too much focus on sexual orientation may make one miss why you wanted to be in a relationship in the first place. To be with people who are non-abusive and who love and understand you. Ultimately that's what Serge was not doing. He was moving from one influence to another. Religious influences grafted on him, but then in the presence of an atheist he would lose belief. He was moving from doctors to psychoanalysts, and being swept along cultural changes, but was not able to row his own oar. In the end, Serge's template of relationships was more important to analyze than what his sexual orientation might turn out to be. Tragically, he learnt that too late.

The Gottman Institute: https://www.gottman.com/

Luise and the cycle of abuse

Towards the end of Serge's life, his greatest weakness was choosing the wrong relationship template. His last intimate relationship was with a women that Serge called "Luise." This story should trigger a lot of recognition for those who know about the cycle of abuse. 

W: [Luise] is a very impulsive woman...Twenty years ago...we ran into each other on the street. And she said, let's make up. I shouldn't have done that.

My father restricted my inheritance until I reached twenty-eight because he was afraid that I might fall into the hands of...a robber. And I always felt, that's not a danger for me. I never thought that I...would become involved in such an affair with this Luise...This Luise was completely unsuitable. Luise is an oaf. It's through her that I spoiled everything for myself.

Therese died and she wrote in her farewell letter: 'Marry a decent woman and go to Sister...and seek her advice, and don't become attached to some slut because that could be the end of you.' She had understood the important thing.

O: That you feel drawn to sluts?

W: Yes, she understood that that's where the danger lies. When I am friends with a decent woman, I can marry and live in some fashion. But there's nothing to be done with a slut. Because sluts...either they demand money from you all the time or who knows what...Well, and that's what happened, and so I find myself in an awful situation with this friend. 

O: But in what way is she a slut?

W: Isn't it being a slut when the woman gets married and tells me nothing about it...and kept coming to me the whole time? Had she said that she had got married, I would have stopped seeing her. But then she divorced him. All right, slut, what does slut mean? The word isn't attractive. Couldn't we find a better one, one that isn't so offensive? Twice I associated with impossible women, and with the first, things turned out all right. I even wrote about it, I was lucky, I got away from her...And then I got involved with this other one and I can't get away from her because the woman has nothing. She has no pension, no health insurance, and she is ill...There's something wrong with her heart, she has angina pectoris, there is something the matter with her kidneys, with her gallbladder, and she has diabetes. What can you do? And now she says she has cancer. I don't know if it's true, of course. And she constantly tortures me with reproaches and wants me to marry her. One cannot marry this woman, she is a serious psychopath. I don't even know what I should talk to her about. It's always the same thing that interests her. We pass a house and she says, 'I wouldn't mind having a house like that...' She makes demands that are altogether absurd...and I have been her lover for twenty-five years, as it were. I only see her on Sundays...She has had two divorces!

O: And she doesn't get anything from those men?

W: Nothing. She is so clever, when people are standing in line at the movies or the theater for tickets, she simply walks up and says, 'I ordered tickets,' and they give them to her. You'd think she's really clever. She has no interests, nothing. She says she has read a great deal. But when I saw what was on her shelves, it isn't true. She is only interested in material things...Constant reproaches. Everything is my fault. I never had any idea that there are people like that, women who are so impossible in every sense...Eissler writes, 'Let her scold, let her rage, what of it?' It's easy for him to talk...But if that woman is constantly causing scandals like one time...We were quarreling on the street and people were already calling the police - that sort of thing is unacceptable. Perhaps you could give me some advice. Solms once said, 'Men are stupid.'

O: There's only one advice one can give, and that is that you dissociate yourself from that woman.

W: Solms says that 'If it didn't work back then, it won't change now.' There were a few occasions when I could have broken with her. But this idea that Solms expressed, that this is the way it has to remain, prevented me. Instead of doing me some good, psychoanalysis did me harm.

O: What was it that attracted you about that woman? Did she have such a strong sexual attraction for you?

W: She had sexual attraction. And the absurd thing is that the sexual attraction wasn't really all that strong...In the beginning, perhaps, but then it decreased...This woman is always ready to quarrel. That's her element. To slander, to berate others, to feel the victim...that all kinds of injustices were perpetrated against her. And everywhere she goes she must have her way. Even in restaurants: her portion is so small, the person at the next table had a larger one. Then she has a heart ailement and says, 'The air is bad.' Or, 'It smells of mothballs, that coat hanging there, it smells of mothballs.' She can't stand it, the window has to be opened. But the waiter says, 'We can't do that, there are other people here, there's a draft...' There is nothing you can talk to her about...There's nothing you can say to her, she immediately starts threatening...It's forever the same thing: disputes with neighbors, the old Bohemian who doesn't open the windows along the corridor, there's a bad smell there, the air is stale...Her interests are so limited. Nothing but constant demands...I feel a certain obligation, because I have been with this woman for such a long time. And she really is ill, isn't she? But the terrible thing is, one cannot talk to this woman. She wanted to report me to the police. She will make her case public - this injustice, this terrible viciousness, what I did to her because I was so old and she is still so young. The public must hear about this; it must be shown on television...'That should be brought to public notice.' You can't talk to her. I sit there like an idiot and keep my mouth shut. And she says, 'You are having another one of your spells.'

O: What sort of spells?

W: A depression....She has the idea that you must be a fool to have depressions...An entirely primitive idea. Well, and what does Solms say? 'A serious psychopath with paranoid ideas.' Wherever she goes, she feels persecuted. She feels disadvantaged by fate.' She demands money for her health and then she buys clothes. And yet she is sixty years old and hates old women. It seems she feels she's a teenager.

O: She's forever buying clothes?

W: Now she has lost weight. And altering things costs more than buying them new.

O: And you go along with that?

W: As you see, unfortunately. But I don't know how it's all going to end.

O: Can you afford it?

W: I got money from the book.

O: And all the money you got...you spent nothing on yourself, you gave it all to your friend?

W: Only she benefited, really. I was so restless at home, and so I gave her the money. I did make that mistake.

O: But she is never satisfied?

W: No, never. And now it's always the same thing: 'What am I going to do when you die?' And I console her. Eissler sends me small amounts of money for her.

O: He sends you money? For what?

W: For that woman.

O: He helps you for humanitarian reasons, or did you give him something for the archive?

W: I gave him quite a few paintings.

O: And the archive pays for them, or does Eissler pay out of his own pocket?

W: The archive.

O: Regularly?

W: Yes.

O: So you actually get a kind of pension from the Freud archive.

W: ...which does me no good, it's for the woman. If they sent it to me, and I kept it, I could live quite well...You can see that everything is full of conflict. And that also influences how I feel.

O: And Luise knows about this?

W: She knows about the archive. I haven't told her anything about the book. But begging isn't pleasant either. And it is not a pleasant feeling that they send me something because they feel compassion for the woman.

O: Will she get something after your death?

W: I'm uncertain. At times, Eissler says one thing, at others another. So a dependence on Eissler has arisen, and so it drags on. And I receive free treatment. A whole number of dependencies arise, and that's harmful, of course. It harms the ego I'd say....

O: In other words you have no talent for making life pleasant for yourself...I would not have taken that much from anyone.

W: That's it: I put up with too much.

O: I find your behaviour odd. If something is proposed to me, I ask myself, what do I want?

W: Yes, yes, I believe the ego is damaged somehow.

W: Eissler wants to keep track of the case that has become so famous - Freud's most famous case - and see how it ends....Eissler has one opinion, Solms another, and Gardiner a third...One becomes involved in a labyrinth of dependencies that contradict each other...According to the theory, one would have to be completely free, uninfluenced...Psychoanalysis should really enable one to live without a father figure. But what actually happens is that one goes on living with the father figure... Sometimes, when I think about all those things, it seems the only way out...Should one kill oneself? I have gas.

O: Gas, you know, is not what it was in 1938. Today, it's practically impossible to kill yourself with gas. The gas is detoxified.

W: Thank you for having told me about the gas.

O: Had you seriously considered it?

W: Yes, but now its out of the question."

Serge did continue on living and enjoyed the company of Karin, and the reader can witness the pleasure that he enjoyed of someone just listening, mirroring and validating him, even if it the interview was about an exposé of psychoanalysis.

"If I were younger, one could at least try it, make an attempt but...You would really be the right woman for me. I get along with you. I don't get along with the other one, and she clings to me. Because you said that you also had gonorrhea, you caused a profound change in me."  Unfortunately for Serge, it was too late to make changes and he had a circulatory collapse. "In early July, the Wolf-Man had received his pension for two months, the monthly check and vacation money. Luise supposedly appeared abruptly at his door, he admitted her, and the meeting ended in a loud row. Finally, she simply snatched 10,000 schillings from his hand and ran off. [He] was terribly upset...During the afternoon of this very hot day, as he was coming back from the tobacco shop, he collapsed."

Serge deteriorated and Karin detailed his last days in the Vienna Psychiatric Hospital: "The Wolf-Man takes a postcard from the open drawer of his nightstand and hands it to me. Here's what Luise writes to a deathly ill, ninety-year-old man who, confined to his bed, is constantly fighting for his breath.

'My dear Serge, I have heard that you are already feeling much better, that your appetite is good and that you can already wash yourself. I am pleased. As you are eating with such a hearty appetite, aren't you thinking of me, that I go hungry, that I am about to be evicted if I cannot pay the rent, that the gas and electricity will be cut off if I can't pay? How can you do that to a person with whom you have spent forty years? I would like to see you, talk to you. I was already there a few times, but the attendants always tell me that that young girl is visiting you again, so I didn't want to disturb you. You must be very much in love if you ordered two flannel suits for 4,500 schillings each and pay all that money for her housekeeping expenses as you told me. Unfortunately, I have no money for stamps or letter paper. So far, I have received nothing of the royalties for August from your book The Wolf-Man by the Wolf-Man. They say you gave it to the professor so he would pass it on to me, but he demands that I pick it up at his place, which is absurd, my lawyer says, and I have it from you in writing that I would get money from Gardiner even after you die.'

[After a brief moment he mumbled,] 'The woman is crazy.'"

As Luise faded into the background during the last two years of his life, Serge had that feeling that so many people feel at the end of their lives. "Life was in vain, everything was pointless, we must build something, something new, begin at the beginning once more...Give me some advice!" His strength faded and his last gesture to Karin was a heartfelt kiss on the hand and a feeble wave before he died the next day.

Amber Heard and Johnny Depp: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aca0KWoHtqQ&t=331s

Modern psychoanalysis

"Take what you can from your dreams, make them as real as anything." - Dave Matthews

Like with many other case studies of Freud, so many disorders have genetic and early life challenges as their source. Is it OCD, Borderline and Narcissistic personality disorders, or a severe masochistic co-dependency? Or is a mixture of all of them? Using the metaphor of the childhood "lucky caul," Serge was stuck inside the veil or caul of dreams and specialness to the end, and so were his therapists who sought to make a name for themselves. By not seeing how the sense of specialness and entitlement would interfere with reality testing, the dreams and desires Serge had would fail to find realistic outlets with independent and assertive decision making, especially with choices of partners. The healthy way to attach importance to specialness is to effort. Special effort, not entitlement. The metaphorical veil or caul is ruminating about possibilities and dreaming about changing the past. Being stuck in painful thoughts while remaining inactive leads to a habit of inhibition.

Serge's past may have looked like a heaven with beautiful estates, servant women, and a sense of entitlement to a great future. It could easily add to the sense of specialness. But when you are at the end of your life, the memories of what actually happened can bring up the question "what if?" He attempted to get his fortune away from Russia, but the inflationary pressures of war diminished it. With his sister's and his wife's suicides, and possibly his father's, the mind could easily think "what if I did this or said that? Maybe they wouldn't have taken their lives." Once the past can't be changed, and in the end, depression never left completely, all that was left for Serge was the hope to "begin at the beginning once more." What motivations would he have needed to make difference choices when he was younger? Most importantly, what was so pathogenic that he couldn't have made better choices?

Nicolas Abraham and Maria Torok, in The Wolf Man's Magic Words: A Cryptonymy, engaged in an abstract word analysis of all the players in the Serge's psychoanalysis, and interpreted the wolf dream as the father having incest with his daughter Anna, and Serge being a witness. The English Governess is told by Serge what had happened and she uses it as blackmail to torture Serge and his family. Serge then oscillated between desiring Anna and imitating her, which would be desiring the father in the latter. He would also have knowledge that could hurt both his parents. This theory, and it's only a theory, brings up a lot of questions. If his father committed suicide, was it because he abused his daughter? Was it because of the political changes he saw in Russia? Was it because he had manic depression? Or is it a combination? Also if instead, Masson and Brunswick were right about Serge being sexually abused, and possibly groomed to desire anal stimulation [anally seduced], both cases could lead Serge to imitate a passive sexual choice. If Serge felt shame about those impulses, then his lack of self-worth and need for repression would continue. A false self that is beyond shame would have to be developed as a protection against a pathogenic secret. The pathogen could be an array of possibilities supported by these theories. For example, shame over wanting to be like Anna, shame over wanting Anna, shame over wanting his father, shame over wanting to be his mother, and shame over wanting to give or receive anal sex. In the end, whatever combination, it would lead ultimately to shame over socially unacceptable sexual desires. Since this "crypt" of a false self in Serge's mind is hiding a body of pathogenic shame, and most importantly, it's somehow unconscious, then he did not recover because his pathogenic secret remained a secret, even to himself. The coffin remains shut and the Russian Iistina, or hidden truth, remains hidden. If on the other hand, this secret was conscious all along, but he did not want to share the information for obvious reasons, he would have to take what he learned from Freud's work and heal himself, if he didn't trust anyone else.

For example, if he read and understood Remembering, repeating and working-through, and if he could see his sexual appetite as a worthy foundation that could go beyond a sister template, then maybe that knowledge could help him identify with different relationship choices and he could avoid choices like being with "Luise." To grow better crops, so to say. In his interviews with Obholzer, he clearly identifies his sister as an object choice, identifies Karin as a good example and even admits that if he were younger he would pursue her. Though this could appear insulting because his template includes an aggressive sister, women with less power, prostitutes and "Luise." Yet reading those interviews with Karin, even if she's aggressive with trying to land an exposé, one gets the impression that she was desired by Serge because he enjoyed being with a woman who listened and accepted him. She accepted his having gonorrhea and his masturbation as normal. That made him feel better. Feeling better, meaning less stress. The stress was caused by some pathogenic desire that he was ashamed of, whether it was a desire for his sister or desires from one of the theories above or else something he never communicated. Shame, we have to remember is a fear of rejection from important social contacts.

Too much shame means you accept bad people in your life you think you deserve, which stops further development. The low self-esteem made him desperate enough to choose mostly one-night-stands, women who had little in common with him, women with less power and prostitutes. He also chose Therese when she really needed his help financially, after the condolence letter reintroduced them to each other. Therese, despite being suicidal, ended up being the best woman for him and even warned against another improper choice, which he ended up choosing. Self-esteem becomes a necessity so you can choose people who care about you, and of course you have to do the same for them, so that as a couple the individuals have permission to improve themselves. Obholzer pointed out before that Serge lacked the assertiveness to ask for what is good for him. If he wanted to look for further methods from Freud, if he read about his letter to Ferenczi, about how he was able to increase his ego by dropping homosexual friendship with Fliess, it happened naturally with disenchantment. Fliess did malpractice on Emma Eckstein's face and Freud distanced himself from him. Serge would have to be disenchanted with his toxic relationship template before he could find a replacement. Since so many women he was involved with didn't want to improve themselves, he would have to be disenchanted by them and move on, while also developing himself. There's really no reason, even for a criminal, to not improve themselves if they believe they have a foundation for different choices. Regardless of dream therapy and it's value, one has to accept oneself and be disenchanted with people who don't allow that. Who's supporting your goals for self-improvement, and who's not? Either your biology prevents improvement, in which case you must accept, or it's just the ideas about yourself that need to change. People have to experiment with their choices to see what's possible for them and not rely on beliefs.

With scandals of people thinking their parents sexually abused them because of Freudian analysis, with some cases being true, but others not, how accurate of a method is it for courts? Like Mahony says about Abraham and Torok's theory of father and sister incest, "coherence is not proof." If some people are capable of passing a lie detector test, and the results are not admitted in all court systems, then certainly dreams could be open to lies and manipulation by so many people. At best dream analysis can help the patient if convincing memories return. They may get a relief where they are able accept what happened, grieve and move on with their life. Phenomenology can only be accessed through the subjective, but unless there is concrete evidence that is objectively available, the whole process moves back onto patient and only they can benefit, since only they can experience their memories. The reader can choose to believe, or leave a question mark for these dream analyses. The memories of the patient must resonate clearly with no skepticism, otherwise it becomes a form of brainwashing where the patient has to believe. 

The biggest question is that if bringing something up into consciousness is supposed to create relief, that may not be the case. Many abuses are not in the unconscious and the patient is very aware of what happened. They don't talk about it because of possible stigma. For example, if the accusations from Brunswick and Masson were true, and the abuse was conscious, who would want to talk about how their anus was groomed to enjoy sexuality and now impulses are being fought over with repression? Anal flashbacks that are conditioned to repeat impulses and desire for anal pleasure, that are also conscious, would continue to cause stress if the patient ruminates on it and what it means in an obsessive way. When something is conscious, guilt and rumination cause their own problems. Serge was aware of his desire for his sister, but it still influenced him even when conscious. Some people go through horrendous abuse that is unconscionable, but they are still able to thrive. Others go through no abuse, or less abuse, and are psychologically compromised very easily. There could be genetic factors with that. And finally, anybody going through two World Wars, family suicides, and a loss of a fortune, are going to be consciously traumatized. No therapy will bring those people back.

Another area that only René Girard tackled in a major way, is what happens if you remove your transference to God, or imitation of Jesus? His warning is that we can just imitate the people around us and that's exactly what happened to Serge. From an atheistic perspective, if Serge wanted to be independent of a father figure, then he would have to consciously not worship a God, another human being, or himself. Now that is a difficult meditation practice! In reality most people have a hope for a loving God, even if it's not aimed at a particular religion, and many people have role models for success. That means social exchanges of trust. Those social exchanges have to be done carefully to avoid exploitation. Like Karin pointed out, if people are making suggestions for you, you have to ask "what do I really want?" Without the ability to negotiate, predators can take everything away from you.

I like Mahony's description of how challenging a patient like this would be for any therapist, in any modality. "The total profile of the Wolf Man's analyses constituted a muddled picture. True, a marriage replaced the flight from woman, and the defective capacity to work gave way to the successful [completion] of a doctor's degree in law and employment for over thirty years in an insurance position. There will surely be those who will criticize psychoanalysis for its technical limitations because of the psychic distress and disorder that stayed on with the Wolf Man: though the depression, guilt, ambivalence, compulsive doubt, and narcissistic demands were abated variously at times, their overall force remained considerable. Whatever shortcomings obtained in the analyses conducted by Freud and Brunswick...I do not think that the best-directed therapy could have sufficiently rehabilitated the severely defective psychic organization and narcissistic structure of the Wolf Man or compensated for the lack of early parental care. He is one of those tragic individuals who remain forever inside a gaping wound and whose hopes grow mostly in lonely dreams." 

Manchester by the sea - "I can't beat it": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAcYyreYFyk

Resources:

The Wolfman and other cases - Sigmund Freud: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780142437452/

The Wolf Man by the Wolf Man - Sergei Pankejeff, Ruth Mack Brunswick, Muriel Gardiner, Anna Freud: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780465091973/

The Wolf Man: 60 years later - Karin Obholzer: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780710093547/

The Cries of the Wolf Man - Patrick J. Mahony: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780823610907/

Freud Standard Edition Vol 12: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780701205256/

The Correspondence of Sigmund Freud and Sándor Ferenczi, Volume 1: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780674174184/

The Assault on Truth - Jeffrey Masson: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780345452795/

The Wolf Man's Magic Words: A Cryptonymy - Nicolas Abraham & Maria Torok: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780816648580/

Freud and the Rat Man - Patrick J. Mahony: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780300036947/

Violent Origins: Ritual Killing and Cultural Formation - Walter Burkert, Jonathan Z. Smith, René Girard, Robert G. Hammerton-Kelly, Renato Rosaldo, Burton Mack: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780804715188/

The War that ended Peace - Margaret MacMillan: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780143173601/

The First World War - John Keegan: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9780676972245/

The Origins of the War of 1914 - Luigi Albertini: https://www.isbns.net/isbn/9781929631261/

Lothane, H. Z. (2018). Freud Bashers: Facts, Fictions, and Fallacies. Journal of the American Psychoanalytic Association, 66(5), 953–969.

Homosexuality Anxiety: A Misunderstood Form of OCD - Monnica Williams: https://www.psychologytoday.com/sites/default/files/attachments/72634/williamshocd2008.pdf

Misusing Freud: Psychoanalysis and the Rise of Homosexual Misusing Freud: Psychoanalysis and the Rise of Homosexual Conversion Therapy - Jonathan Barrett: https://digitalscholarship.unlv.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1027&context=psi_sigma_siren

How do I know I'm really not gay? Fred Penzel: https://iocdf.org/expert-opinions/homosexual-obsessions/

Sigmund Freud urged his disciple to divorce: https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-11-12-vw-20532-story.html

The Master's mad move: https://www.theguardian.com/books/1999/jan/30/sigmundfreud

Conditions for intuitive expertise: a failure to disagree. Daniel Kahneman, Gary Klein Am Psychol. 2009 Sep; 64(6): 515–526

Alan Cumming Is Bisexual — And You Might Be Too: https://www.advocate.com/bisexuality/2015/03/30/alan-cumming-bisexual-and-you-might-be-too

Alan Cumming Sounds Off On Being Bisexual And Being Married To A Man: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/alan-cumming-bisexual-_n_4460070

Psychology: http://psychreviews.org/category/psychology01/