#On g-d i'm gonna make you experience my word vomit

[jellybeandrawsthings]

Up in smoke (Supergirl one-shot)

Not a drawing. Yes, I know, I know. I’m jellybeandrawsthings, not jellybeanwritesthings. But this idea wouldn’t leave my head so I wrote it down, then I didn’t even look at it for a few weeks, then I rewrote it, and here we are. Constructive criticism is welcome but also this is my first fic so be gentle. Not a native English speaker so if there are any mistakes I’m sorry. Trigger warning : injury, death mention (but no one dies in the story I promise)

also if you’re on mobile, tumblr sucks ass with formating. Sorry.

There is no fire without smoke,

but I had seen many times 

a smoke without fire

It’s another fight with yet another villain, but it’s different this time.

This time Supergirl might not save the day.

She’s trapped, her left leg crushed under a boulder of weird alien metal, it’s too heavy, even for her. Behind her, there are screams, people running away in panic from a slowly collapsing office building. A bomb went off, destroying one of it’s supporting pillars just so. Supergirl tries to move, but she can’t.

(She can’t, and she can’t, and she can’t.

And she tries again)

She wonders if this is the day she’ll have to listen to hundreds of people dying (a sound so achingly familiar), crying for her to save them.

While she can’t do anything.

Trapped.

Powerless.

Will it be another Krypton.

(Faces burned into her eyelids, the weight of the dead heavier on her shoulders. And the feeling of guilt, always guilt)

The screaming is getting louder now, she looks back, there are so many people. Too many. Too slow. She sees a father carrying a little girl in his arms, running as fast as he can.

(Just like her father when he carried her away to the escape pod)

She knows it’s not fast enough, they’ll never make it. The little girl in his arms looks her way, there is fear in those eyes, fear no little child should ever experience.

She makes a decision then, she’s Supergirl, she might not be strong enough to move the boulder, but she’s not powerless. With closed eyes, she focuses, tunes out all the sounds around her, takes a deep breath, and when she opens them she unleashes her heat vision.

(Did it hurt this much burning together with Krypton?

There’s no one to ask. The dead are silent.

She imagines them agreeing with her anyway)

There are news vans in the distance, reporting on the chaos.

They watch in horror as Supergirl cuts away her own leg.

(They don’t look away.

It feels… wrong.

Somehow.

Like.. like they would be betraying their hero, by looking away)

Her screams echo through the city and the horrible smell of burning flesh fills the air around her. She screams and screams, and it feels like she’s been screaming for ages, the pain is like nothing she’s ever felt before. And then she’s free, and she still screams, her body in pure agony. But there are still cries for help behind her, and it grounds her. She did this for them.

(for them, for them, for them,

and maybe for Krypton too)

She can’t succumb to the pain. Not now.

With one last steadying breath she flies off, right to where the damaged support pillar is caving under the weight of the building. Focusing all her strength she position herself next to the bent in the pillar and takes on the weight it used to support, effectively holding up the building. It’s heavy but she can do it, she has to.

(She has to)

Slowly, oh so slowly, the area clears, people get out scared and worse for wear, but alive.

(she sees the father with the little girl whose crying and holding onto him for dear life, not letting go)

(she wishes she hadn’t had to let go of her own father all those years ago)

She savors the sound of their heartbeats, it helps her hold on to the little strength she still has.

When the fire department finally shows up at the scene she’s ready to burst into tears, she feels so weak, and the pain makes her feel dizzy, her eyes unfocused make everything look blurry.

(Or maybe it’s the smoke, there’s a lot of smoke. Was there this much smoke on Krypton?

She can’t remember.

She can’t remember.

It must have been more.

Must have)

She doesn’t know how she manages to hold the building while they’re securing the pillar. Maybe Rao is still looking after her. But when all is said and done, firefighters telling her it’s okay to let go now, she plummets to the ground, passing out before she can hit the pavement.

Years later she’s still going to argue that the dent in the concrete isn’t from her ass hitting the ground, but instead

“was already there, thank you very much. You should stop making fun of me Alex before I throw my prosthetic at you. I’m not joking around. And stop laughing Lena you’re supposed to be on my side!”

It’s safe to say Alex gets very familiar with the feeling of a prosthetic leg hitting her over the head.

(“That’s not fair! Lena was laughing too! Why doesn’t she get hit?!?”

“Because. She’s gonna make me sleep on the couch if she does.”

“It’s supposed to be bros before hoes Ka- Ouch!”)

Kara wouldn’t have it any other way.