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michaelsfavgirl · 6 months ago

Text

NSFW alphabet

Pairing: Michael Jackson x fem!reader

Tags: Smut, mention of mirror sex, creampie, toys, public play, foreplay, semi-exhibitionism, outdoor sex, somno, masturbation, size kink, mention of a foot fetish (oop), teasing, mike being whipped and pussydrunk, porn, oral (f & m), mike's enormous monster cock, edging, overstimulation, mention of dp…

Word Count: 4.8k

Requested: yes/no

Author’s Note: You can tell I started to lose my sanity at the end

Links: navigation | masterlist | taglist

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Pop, Rock and Soul aren't the only things he's the king of, he’s also most certainly the king of aftercare. Michael takes aftercare to a whole new level, turning it into an art form that rivals his mastery of music. For him, aftercare is not just an afterthought, it's as important as the act itself and the foreplay leading up to it. You’ll never catch him lacking

After the heat of passion has subsided, he gently guides you to lay on your shared, soft sheets, allowing you to catch your breath while he admires you with a look of pure adoration in his eyes. His touch is tender as he massages your heated skin, soothing any lingering tension and leaving you feeling utterly cherished.

Alright I'm going off on a tangent, back to aftercare! When it comes to cleaning up after sex, Michael prefers to do things properly. Instead of reaching for a mere wet rag, he opts for a shower or bath, finding the experience infinitely more intimate. With his hands in the warm water, he lavishes attention on every inch of your body. While he may melt at the suggestion of you returning the favor, his focus remains solely on pampering you.

Physical exertion is strictly off-limits after sex. Michael won't hear of you doing anything even remotely taxing. Instead, cuddles are mandatory.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Michael's adoration for you is evident to anyone who crosses your path; it's as if you radiate an otherworldly beauty that captivates all who are fortunate enough to behold you. From the strands of your hair to the tips of your pedicured toes (which, of course, he insists on paying for), you are nothing short of a goddess walking among mortals. If you asked him to choose a favorite part of your exquisite form, he would malfunction, how dare you make him choose?

��however, when it comes to the sexual side of your relationship there are certain aspects of your body that he simply can't resist fixating on. He loves your hips, his large hands seem to have a mind of their own as they instinctively find their way there. Loves to squeeze them, especially when you’re in company and he needs to silently convey his yearning for you. Now if you’re chubby/plus size he’s obsessed with your love handles. Marveling at the way his fingers effortlessly find purchase in the soft folds of your flesh, when he’s taking your breath away with each thrust of his hips.

As for Michael's own body, it’s no surprise that he likes his hands. I mean have you seen them?! He knows the effect they have on you, he's caught you, not so discreetly, staring at them on multiple occasions. Loves to make you watch him play with your wet cunt in front of a mirror. He firmly yet gently cups your jaw to make sure your eyes stay glued to your reflection as he pushes his fingers into you, scissoring them in and out while slipping his thumb past your lips.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Certified creampie lover. Yes, seeing your soft skin glistening with his pearly beads of cum is undeniably arousing but it's the sight of his spent oozing out of your sensitive pussy that truly drives him wild. That sight alone is enough to get his length hardening in an instant.

There's something undeniably primal about the way he fills you to the brim, until his own semen spills over, unable to be contained by your warmth, trickling down your slit in a deliciously messy display. The added messiness and the sinful squelching sounds only serve to send him into overdrive, fueling his desire to claim you again and again.

On occasions when there's no need to leave the confines of your home, Michael isn't shy about shoving his creamy mess deep into you with his thick fingers, then nonchalantly pulling up your panties as if it's the most natural thing in the world. He unashamedly revels in the sheer debauchery of watching you walk around with his cum dripping out of you, soaking your underwear. And just when you think he's done, he'll surprise you with an occasional check, slipping his warm hand under your panties to slide his fingers between your folds, deliberately ignoring your clit as he teases you about how drenched you are.

However, if Michael is feeling slightly remorseful or if you two have places to be, he'll opt for a more discreet approach. In such instances, he'll push a plug past your tight entrance, ensuring that his creamy aftermath is neatly contained within you. But this "tidiness" comes with a price—the plug he chooses is usually a remote-controlled vibrator, allowing him to maintain his dominance over you even when you're out in public.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Michael is an open book when it comes to sharing his fantasies and kinks with you, but there are certain desires he keeps hidden, reserved for the privacy of his own mind. One such secret, (yes there’s multiple) nestled deep within the recesses of his consciousness, is somnophilia.

There's an undeniable allure to the sight of you lost in slumber, your features softened by the peaceful embrace of unconsciousness. As you lie there, your slow, rhythmic breaths filling the room, Michael finds himself mesmerized by the sight of your sleeping form. He can’t help the blood pumping in his veins when you inch your leg higher, seeking a more comfortable position, whilst inadvertently revealing tantalizing glimpses of your clothed pussy.

He only wants to rub your little clit that's all, or maybe also slip a finger or two into your slippery hole. Can you blame him for wanting to make his precious girl feel good? For wanting you to wake you with that familiar, pleasurable sensation between your legs?

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

As much as the media wants to portray him as a clueless virgin to the public, behind closed doors, he's far from inexperienced. He's no prude and unfortunately for his mama he didn't wait till marriage. Trust he knows what he's doing. He knows his way around a bedroom, his every touch calculated to elicit gasps of ecstasy. With Michael, there's no fumbling or uncertainty.

In the beginning, when you first became intimate Michael made it his mission to commit to memory the nuances of your body and what turns you on. He focused solely on you, trying to gauge your reactions, see what brought you the most pleasure and what you didn’t seem too fond of. He learned to read your body like a well-worn book, to anticipate your every whim and desire before it even crossed your mind. His touch became more intuitive, his movements more fluid, as he effortlessly guided you to the heights of ecstasy and beyond.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

To him, it's an absurd question because He has no issue with bringing you the most pleasure in any position. and he's more than willing to explore them all with you. Of course, if you have one, he's more than happy to accommodate. Your satisfaction is his top priority, and he'll go out of his way to make sure you're getting exactly what you want.

But I know you want to know more so here are honorable mentions: The mating press: oh lord, he’s obsessed with how deep he can go. He revels in the sensation of plunging deep into your drooling cunt, his hips slamming against yours with a ferocity that borders on animalistic. Almost cums on the spot at the sight of your jaw unhinging as his tip kisses your cervix with each powerful thrust.

Standing up/against a wall: these are mainly reserved for quickies. Loves the urgency, the need to satisfy your needs in the heat of the moment. He delights in pushing you against a wall, his hands gripping your hips as he slides into your puffy cunt with abandon. Bonus points for watching your ass jiggle.

Low doggy style: prefers this one over the traditional doggy as you have to do even less. There's no need to strain your spine or hurt your elbows; no, instead all his sweet girl has to do is lie comfortably on the sheets and let him do all the work.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

Michael has a fantastic sense of humor, most of his friends and family will agree. However, when it comes to matters of the bedroom, he adopts a more serious demeanor. He wants your thoughts to meld together, your senses attuned to the delicious stretch of his cock or the tantalizing sensation of his mouth between your legs. To introduce humor into such a sacred space would be to risk disrupting the delicate balance of pleasure and passion that he works so tirelessly to achieve.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Michael takes great pride in his grooming habits, ensuring that he is always impeccably clean and well-maintained, especially when it comes to his nether regions. While he may not be a fan of shaving, he keeps his pubic hair neatly trimmed, finding that the hair adds a touch of masculinity to his appearance. However, he does make an exception when it comes to his balls, preferring to keep them smooth for your convenience and enjoyment.

As for his preference when it comes to your grooming habits, Michael has a strong preference for a full bush. This is factual, you can't tell me otherwise. He's a product of the 70s era, where lush and natural pubic hair was the norm. The wilder the better. He told me so himself.

Adores when it gets messy with his cum or feels it dampen with your arousal as he pleasures you. He loves the way the soft hairs brush against his cheeks when he's sucking on your clit or when your pubic hair tangles with his own as he thrusts deeply into you.

Plus when the two of you are lounging on the couch, boredom sometimes leads him to slip his hand under your pants to absentmindedly play with the tufts of hair at the top of your mound.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

For Michael, sex isn't just a physical act, it's the ultimate expression of intimacy and connection. He views it as something sacred, a deeply personal and meaningful experience. He’s always doting on you in your relationship so that doesn’t change in the bedroom, he actually becomes even more affectionate. From gentle whispers of endearment to tender kisses placed upon your skin, he leaves no doubt in your mind that you are his everything, the center of his universe, and he is utterly devoted to your pleasure and satisfaction.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Before you entered his life, Michael's hand was no stranger to his throbbing shaft, especially with the weight of carrying the entire music industry on his back. Masturbation served as a way to let off steam and alleviate the relentless stress. But once you became intimately involved, his solo sessions dwindled significantly. Your touch, your scent, your very essence eclipsed any pleasure he could derive from his own hand. So, he'd much rather wait to get his hands on you.

Even when you're not in the mood, he holds off. Some might say he edges this way but of course, he'd never admit to such lewd accusations.

However, when the demands of touring keep him separated from you for months on end, Michael's resolve is put to the ultimate test. Alone in his hotel room, he finds himself unable to resist the primal urge to seek release. With your panties clenched tightly in his fist, his hand moves with a frenzied urgency, his shaft pulsating with need as he conjures vivid memories of fucking you senseless, eagerly counting down the days until he can hold you in his arms once again.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Lowkey a freak. All that repressed sexual desire from being in a highly religious household really did its thing, taught him how to conceal his deepest yearnings behind a façade of propriety and restraint. Considers himself more kinky than most. Even when he comes across someone who's also into kinky stuff they’re usually into the typical bdsm-like things whilst Michael's tastes veer decidedly into the realm of the unconventional. our man gets off on the weirder fetishes. (still love him though)

Aside from those when it comes to the more “normal” desires he’s into immortalizing your most intimate encounters with a click of his camera shutter. Polaroids and videos of the most raunchy moments that would put Kim K’s tape to shame. Of course your faces are still always out of the frame, after all, discretion is important when you're the most famous person in the world.

Has a raging size kink that borders on obsession. (not talking about body size) Each time he has to prep you with his fingers, the sensation of stretching you to accommodate his girthy cock makes his brain melt. Also unashamedly loves being messy and spitting in your mouth. I could go on forever listing them so let’s stop, we've got more to talk about.

Also may or may not have a foot fetish, but i didn't tell you that.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Mainly prefers the privacy of your neverland ranch but he's not limited to the confines of the bedroom. There’s no surface in your home that hasn’t been christened by the both of you. from the kitchen counter to the inviting waters of the pool.

Considers himself a semi-exhibitionist, relishing in the thrill of the forbidden without the desire to actually get caught in the act. There's something about the risk of being discovered, of stifling your moans with his palm while keeping a vigilant eye out for prying eyes. It's the adrenaline rush of teetering on the edge of discovery that sets his pulse racing.

Outside of your haven he prefers either his dressing room or somewhere out in nature. Making love to you while you're laying on a soft blanket in the middle of a flowery field while the birds are chirping? Sign him the fuck up.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Michael's motivations are as straightforward as they come: you. The simple presence of your divine form is enough to send his desire into overdrive. Call it whipped if you must, but he sees it as a privilege to be enraptured by the allure of the sexiest woman in existence.

Strangely enough, it's not the overtly seductive gestures that get him going. No, it's the everyday moments, the mundane activities that hold the power to ignite the flames of passion within him. You can be lounging on the couch beside him, lost in conversation on the phone or simply lost in your own thoughts and the innocent sound of your sighs or the arch of your neck as you stretch will get him chubbing up instantly.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Michael has firm boundaries when it comes to certain acts in the bedroom, rooted in the trauma he endured at the hands of his father. The idea of causing you any harm, whether physical or emotional, is utterly unthinkable to him. Squeezing your hips? Sure. a spank on your soft ass? Alright. but anything more aggressive or degrading is strictly off-limits. The thought of leaving a mark on your delicate skin or causing you any distress sends shivers down his spine.

Another thing that's off the table for Michael is pornography. He simply can't bring himself to watch other naked women when he's got his very own P.Y.T. by his side. Besides, with his penchant for taking Polaroids and videos, he's got his own personal collection that far surpasses anything he could find online. Why settle for generic smut when he has the real deal right in front of him?

At last, subbing is something he’ll never do. Nope, not happening. He's a pleasure/service dom through and through, and the idea of you putting in any work to satisfy him instead of the other way around? Yeah, that's a major turn-off for him. Katherine didnt raise no 50/50 “let's split the bill” goon.

When he's really exhausted but still wants to please you, he'll reluctantly let you take the reins. Will let you bounce on his fat cock as you use him for your own pleasure. It's the closest thing to submission you'll ever get from him, but even then, that doesn’t happen often and he's still calling the shots, making sure you're getting exactly what you need while he serves as your willing plaything.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Michael's got a Ph.D. from the pussy eating academy, wait no, scratch that, he's the one who founded the university. He’s the founding father, the dean, and the star pupil all rolled into one. Therefore he's more of a giver. It's not just a preference; it's a calling. Sounds overused but he really could spend hours nestled between your thighs, worshiping at the altar of your pleasure.

And let's talk about his chronic clit-sucking habit. Once he gets going, there's no stopping him. He'll latch onto that little bundle of nerves like his life depends on it, not even bothering to detach his lips when he sees it swollen and sensitive from his ministrations. And when your thighs instinctively squeeze around his head, well, let's just say it's his version of heaven on earth. Deny him the chance to feast on you daily, and he'll legit start having wet dreams about it. No joke.

Now, when it comes to receiving oral, Michael's a bit more reserved. He prides himself on being a gentleman, and making you kneel on a cold wooden floor just doesn't sit right with him. He'll only let you go down on him on special occasions, and even then, he's careful not to push you too far. You won't be deep-throating him anytime soon—just the tip, thank you very much. He's all about ensuring your comfort, and he's not about to let you strain your jaw for his pleasure.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He's somewhere in between. He's quite blessed downstairs so he knows he needs to tread carefully to avoid accidentally causing you any discomfort. “Technique is more important than pace” truther. That being said, there are moments when he's not afraid to let loose and take you hard and fast, especially if he's feeling particularly stressed or you've been a bit of a brat.

But if he's not in the mood for a wild romp, it'll take some serious convincing, a healthy dose of luck, and maybe a few well-timed puppy dog eyes to get him to crank up the intensity. And if you manage to persuade him to pound you into the mattress he'll step up his aftercare game to a whole new level.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

There's something undeniably thrilling about swiftly pulling aside clothes, not bothering with the formality of full undressing, and dropping to his knees to bury his head under your skirt for a quick taste of ecstasy. The urgency of it all, the risk of getting caught, it's enough to send shivers down his spine and get his blood pumping. He gets it, he really does.

But as much as he enjoys the occasional quickie, nothing compares to the ecstasy of taking his time with you. Michael is all about savoring every moment, prolonging foreplay until you're practically begging for release. He revels in edging you to the brink, pushing you to the very limits of pleasure until you're a quivering, whimpering mess beneath him. And when you finally can't take it anymore, when you're cumming so hard you can barely see straight, that's when he knows he's done his job right.

Seeing your legs trembling, your eyes rolling back in bliss, and your beautiful face contorted with pleasure is the ultimate reward for him. So while quickies may have their appeal, for Michael, nothing beats the pure, unadulterated ecstasy of taking his time and making you cum over and over again.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

Michael is all about pleasing you so if you've got a fantasy you've been dying to try, you can bet he'll be game for it. Even if it's not exactly his cup of tea, he'll give it a shot at least once, just to see the look of satisfaction on your face. There are very few things he’d not try, especially with you. Your pleasure is his top priority, and he'll go to great lengths to ensure you feel comfortable and fulfilled in the bedroom. So don't be shy about sharing your wildest fantasies with him – he's always eager to turn your dreams into reality.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

You could be lying there, barely able to catch your breath after multiple rounds, and he'll be grinning like a Cheshire cat, asking if you can give him one more orgasm. And trust me, you never have to worry about taking too long to cum or him finishing before you do as this man can dance, sing, and entertain on stage for hours on end without breaking a sweat.

You’ve never had an experience when you didn’t cum or that he climaxed first. Absolutely not. He's a master at making sure you reach climax first, every single time. He's all about you and your pleasure baby. You'll never leave the bedroom unsatisfied when Michael's in charge.

He usually goes for three rounds and can last around thirty minutes before he finally lets himself climax. And even then, his refractory period is short – just a few minutes, maybe ten if he's had an especially intense orgasm. So rest assured, you'll be in for a wild ride every time you're between the sheets with him.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He does have a stash of toys that are mostly for your pleasure and he's not shy about putting them to good use. From vibrators to plugs to dildos (none bigger than his own length, of course) to lots of lube, he’s got everything you need.

He is not one of those men who get insecure and compare themselves to silicone toys. In fact, he sees them as valuable tools for enhancing your pleasure, not as competition. He knows that they can help him make you feel even better. They're besties not enemies.

He's especially into the idea of double penetration, but he's not about to invite someone else into the bedroom to make it happen. That's where the toys come in handy. He can fill both of your holes at the same time, giving you the kind of mind-blowing pleasure you crave.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

After music teasing you is his second most favorite thing to do. You hate how naturally it comes to him. No matter what the situation, he always manages to find a way to make your face feel hot, leaving you squirming and begging for more.

It's almost unfair how good he is at it. One minute you're just minding your own business, and the next, he's got you swatting at his arm and burying your face in his chest, trying to hide the embarrassment. But deep down, you secretly love every second of it – even if you'd never admit it out loud.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Unlike some guys, Michael isn't shy about letting the world know when you're making him feel good. He's a vocal one, and he sees no reason to hold back. I mean, why would he want to hide the fact that you're driving him wild with pleasure? Especially when you're at home, he couldn't care less if the maids or security overhear (they've all signed NDAs anyway), he's not holding anything back.

And let's talk about that mouth of his. It's downright filthy, I tell you. Once he gets going, there's no shutting him up. He's always whispering the nastiest, dirtiest things into your ear, sending shivers down your spine and making your gummy walls clench around him like a vice.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Remember the dildos I mentioned in the toys section? Well this little freak has made a custom made dildo for you that is an exact replica of his cock. Yeah, you read that right. I’m going to give you a second to take that in……

he was absolutely buzzing with excitement, literally had his dick in a mold, imagining your reaction when you laid eyes on it.

Before jetting off on tour, he carefully placed this anatomically accurate marvel in a discreet box on your bed, like a tantalizing treasure waiting to be discovered. And then, without so much as a backward glance, he vanished to conquer stages in far-off lands, leaving you to uncover his risqué gift in his absence.

When you finally laid eyes on that uncanny replica, your face surely turned as hot as a boiling teapot. From the lifelike color to the intricate veins, every detail is meticulously crafted to match the one you’re all too familiar with.

When Michael called you from across the globe, you could practically hear the mischievous smirk in his voice as he awaited your reaction, fully aware of the tidal wave of emotions that “little” creation would unleash.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I'm just expanding on this post I made a while ago.

He’s 7 inches when soft, 9 when hard. And before you start with the "unrealistic" talk, let me stop you right there, this blog is not the place for that. We're on Tumblr for crying out loud. Besides, rumor has it that Michael was packing something closer to a 12-inch monster, so let's just say 9 inches is well within the realm of possibility for our man.

But besides length you may say “length isnt everything its all about the girth” you are correct and to that i give you one hint–can of soda.(which is around 21 cm btw). He is absolutely obsessed with the fact that your hand can barely wrap around his impressive shaft.

Also he's uncut, with faint veins tracing their way all over, adding an extra layer of sensation as they glide against your slick walls. Has big soft balls to match the length. They are very sensitive so every time they slap against your bottom he's panting from the sheer overstimulation. Sucking on them during oral for longer than a few seconds will have you witnessing a rare sight of him losing his control.

Michael takes great care of himself physically so his cum tastes relatively good, never have you felt the need to spit it out. It's so thick and milky as well, all that creamy goodness looks mouthwatering, painting your skin or insides.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Good luck soldier cause he has a very high libido. And he has the audacity to blame it on you. He'll look you dead in the eye and say, "How can I not be insatiable when I wake up next to the most beautiful girl in the world?" Cheesy bastard.

As much as Michael yearns for you every damn day, he's not about to let his desires override your comfort. He's a gentleman through and through. If he notices that you're still feeling sore from the previous night's escapades, he'll restrain himself because at the end of the day, your comfort and well-being come above anything else, even his insatiable hunger for you.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

you're usually the first one to tap out. After all those gentle caresses and sweet nothings whispered in your ear, it's a wonder you manage to stay awake at all. But Michael's not the type to tease you about it, he's too busy showering you with praise for how well you did for him. He'll pull you close to his chest and tell you to close those pretty eyes and rest. There's no better lullaby than the sound of his steady heartbeat as you drift off into dreamland. Makes sure you are snuggled up close to his chest before he lets himself drift off.

Taglist: @theladyinmoscow @yeriminist @yeaiamme2 @helloaugustmoon @cinnamoncunt @theladyofmylife @minekarina @kionaaa @theskinniestjackson-denny @leociinta @graciegizmo3184 @theasexual-jackson @mrsmikaelsxn @fallinlovewithevil @armasbw @b3rk1ey @sirusxx @maybe7tommorow @falllovesomemichealjackson @moonuoi @iconsmjj

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bullet-prooflove · 1 year ago

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Help Wanted - Bottles x Reader

Tagging: @proceduralpassion @crazy4chickennuggets @callsignartemis @kmc1989 @darqchilddaydreamz @the-person-in-the-circle @librarian1002 @prettyinpunk85 @thanossexual @@littlestroman @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @lunamoon @s1lverhand @wakeama @adaydreamaway08

When your dad gets sick you pull away from him. Bottles isn’t sure if it’s a self defence mechanism, if you need the brain space or what. All he knows is that you aren’t around, and that you stop picking up his calls. When he goes past your house, it’s dark and locked up. It goes on for a few weeks. The two of you have only been together a few months but the idea of you in pain wounds him, your absence in his life cuts deep.

When he does catch up with you it’s at the supermarket of all places. It’s ridiculous how something as normal as buying toilet roll can turn into a twist of fate. He isn’t looking where he’s going when he comes around the corner of an aisle, and he bumps into you literally. He knows it’s you before he even registers your face, the recognition is instinctive at this point, he’s attuned to your presence. He catches the scent of your perfume, sensual and soft with a hint of mandarin.

You look tired, your hair is pulled back into messy bun and looks like it hasn’t been washed for days. Your face is gaunt and there’s dark shadows underneath your eyes. You are far from the vibrant girl he knows and loves, and it kills him.

“Talk to me.” He requests his hand coming to rest upon your arm, his thumb chasing over the hollow of your wrist. “As a friend, as a lover, I don’t care what.”

It’s at a table, in the outdoor seating area of the café next door, that the whole thing comes pouring out of you. Your dad’s been sick for a while, longer than you realised and you don’t have time anything else in your life right now.

It had started with him calling you at odd hours to ask when Family Fortunes was on, something that he had never done before. Bottles remembers these phone calls vividly, because they always seemed to occur around a similar time on a Saturday. Your phone would ring and the two of you would look at the clock and he’d say “It’s your dad” without even looking at the call display.

At first you had thought he was just lonely, your job as an events manager kept you busy especially with the Santo Padre Summer Festival on the cards. Then one day you’d popped over and discovered he’d had a mini stroke. He’d lost movement in his left hand, he could barely hold the remote, his memory was shot to shit, and he was asking where your mother was despite the fact, she had passed away five years earlier. It was soul destroying.

You are one of the strongest people he knows, so when you start to cry it breaks something deep down inside of him. He shifts seats to the one alongside of you and wraps his arms around you because this shit is far too much for one person to bear. He holds you close as you sob into his chest, cradling you close.

He knows a thing or two about being exhausted and overwrought, how it feels like a weight bearing down on you. After his father died of an opioid overdose, his mother hadn’t been able to get out of bed for weeks. His relationship with both of his parents had been fraught, but he had spent that time taking care of her. He made sure she ate, that she had company and little by little he’d helped pull her out of the depression until she had started to function again. He knows that this shit isn’t easy. That between your job and caring for your father you’re wearing yourself down, he can see in your eyes how your struggling to cope.

“Let me help.” He asks you. “Please just let me help you.”

He must catch you in a moment of complete weakness because you agree.

The first time Bottles turns up at your father’s house, the old man thinks he’s one of the in-house nurses that he’s managed to run off. There’s been a couple of them so far and none of stuck around more than a few days. After spending a couple of hours with your father he can see why.

He’s a veteran, he used to be a Captain. People like that hate anyone to seeing them vulnerable, so they lash out. Bottles thinks that’s part of the reason he didn’t tell you about the mini stroke in the first place, he didn’t want to shift this burden onto your shoulders.

Albert or rather Bertie, is not kind with his words but Bottles has lived through worse. He’s entire life has been far from a walk in the park and he’s now a Prospect in the Mayans. Your father is a cake walk compared to that. He isn’t sure how it happened but the three of you slip into a routine. You’ve taken as many days as you can away from work, so Bottles steps in to cover the time you’re away. He cooks for Bertie, he helps bathe him, cleans him up and changes the sheets if he doesn’t make it to the bathroom in time, he does as much of the heavy lifting as he can until Bertie starts to get a little better.

When you come home, he shoots out and deals with club business. At night, he curls up around you in your single bed, holding your close and whispering tender words into your ear until you fall sleep, surrounded by Blink 182 posters and Evanescence playing on the C.D player because he’d forgotten that they’d even existed. He switches it up with a couple of Green Day C.Ds after he’s flicked through your collection.

“There’s no money you know.” Bertie tells him one day when the two of them are in the living room watching Family Fortunes. It takes Bottles a minute to understand what he’s saying. “She doesn’t get much if I die. That’s why you’re here isn’t it?”

“I’m not here for the money.” He informs Bertie as he raises to his feet and collects Bertie’s bowl from the tray set across his lap and places it inside his own. “I’m here for her, to make sure she takes care of herself.”

“I used to take care of her and now she takes care of me, how fucked up is that?” Bertie says in a rare moment of clarity. “I fucking hate it.”

Bottles can understand that. Parents are God in the eyes of children, and this is what happens when you realise that they’re just mere mortals like the rest of you. He knows how jarring this whole experience has been for you, and for Bertie. Confronting your own mortality changes you, he knows, he spent his entire childhood, thinking he was going to die every time he went under the knife because a child with a disability wasn’t good enough for his parents. He sets the bowls down on the floor beside his usual chair before sitting down again.

“I had forty-six surgeries by the time I was eighteen,” He confides to Bertie, pulling up his trouser leg and showing your father his scars embedded deep within the tissue of his leg. “Suffering isn’t new to me, you can’t imagine the shit I’ve gone through, and I can’t imagine the shit you are going through but I know what it’s like to feel like your life isn’t your own, to feel frustrated by your own capabilities.”

“I don’t want this for her.” Bertie tells Bottles. “I don’t want her putting her life on hold to take care of me and I don’t want to end up in one of those homes where they feed you gruel and leave you to die alone in a bedroom where the curtains are still drawn because nobody bothered to open them.”

“I hear you.” Bottles says. “It’s fucking depressing.”

“So, what are my options?” Bertie asks him. “I rely on my daughter and her… What even are you?”

Bottles shrugs his shoulders because truthfully the two of you have never really put a label on it. All he knows is he’s committed to you; he has been since the moment he kissed you on your doorstep.

“The man who loves your daughter.”

“Boyfriend? Partner? The guy who hoses me down when I make a mess of myself?”

Bottles finds himself smiling before he shrugs his shoulders.

“All of the above.”

“I’m serious when I’m asking you what my options are.” Bertie informs him, his gaze straying back to the T.V. “I need to start figuring shit out before I start losing my marbles and the decision is taken away from me.”

“I could find out.” Bottles offers as he leans in close. It feels like the two of them are engaging in a conspiracy, because the both of them know that the idea of putting your father in a home is not something you agree with. “One of the guys in my club, his mom has memory issues. She started to fall down a lot. He managed to get her into this sweet place up by the community centre. She loves it there, she’s made a lot of friends, there’s all these clubs she goes too, they do some pretty cool shit. I could look into it for you?”

Bertie reaches across the space between the two of them, his strong hand grasping Bottles’.

“Could you?” Bertie requests before he tilts his head to the bedroom door where you’re sleeping. “I have a feeling we’re gonna have a fight on our hands.”

"I'll talk to her." Bottles promises the older man. "See if we can't all get on the same page."

Love Bottles? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Wanna read more? Check out Bottle's Masterlist here!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

#bottles goggles #bottles x you #bottles x reader #bottles mayans #bottles mayans mc

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cerosin-bis · 2 years ago

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Any König hcs? Relationship based? How he reacts with different forms of upset???

Okay so first, I wrote 'base' headcanons for him here and here! And here are a few relationship headcanons for König:

You figure, given his character, the ideal date for him is going on a hike or somewhere very calm/remote. Yes, he's able to go out and eat in a restaurant or go to a coffee shop of course, he is a functional human being, but he doesn't like it. Also he loves nature, he's an outdoors guy. So, quality time will most likely always be spent outside, and far from any city, thank you very much.

He wants to do so well for his partner. König overthinks everything, whether it is the flirting part, arguments, even gifts or displays of affection. It's not easy at times, and will demand adjustements and a lot of communication, more than average; but he's very very attentionate in return.

König gets jealous, but not the possessive kind, the "I have bad self-esteem" kind. It's sometimes so intense it can appear egoistical (comes in a bundle with bad self-esteem - for real). He'll assume people will lose interest in him, and the more he cares about someone, the worse it is.

He's not overbearing and, despite his anxieties, not clingy. His trust allows for time apart. But he needs someone who will reciprocate his affection (which is quality!), that is for sure. He's extremely devoted and it needs to go both ways.

(since technically this is still a headcanon: I ship him with one of the Kortac guys lol)

More under the cut regarding the last part of your ask:

For the ways König reacts when he's upset:

His impulse control isn't well balanced. He's cold-headed on some things, but snaps really fast about others.

Pushing him over his boundaries will either get him to close off completely or get upset. When he's upset, he's angry. When he's really angry, he breaks things. It's really hard to get to that point though.

Socially, if he's drained and someone is pressing him, he'll just go 🧍‍♂️, will stop talking, avoid eye contact, dismiss conversations. He can get rude lol.

If he's angry at something (like, genuinely pissed at someone or something) he is going to swear A LOT. Also he raises his voice easily.

#könig #headcanons #ask #it's always so daunting to answer those. hope you like it 😭#call of duty #konig

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magz · 1 year ago

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Hardware proof-of-concept projects Magz found interesting, from "hack-a-day-prize 2023, 10th anniversary" event.

Contest where engineers and tech enthusiast, submit their hardware projects.

(Link to "Hack-a-day Prize 2023 event" page)

youtube

Video Title. "Open Book: 2023 #HackadayPrize Video" Project Description. "The Open Book: An open hardware reading device that's easy to build, easy to manufacture, and easy to make your own."

(Link to "Open Book" Project page, on Hack-a-day website)

Note: Is open source hardware and firmware. However, "Open book" Reading device only support plain-text file for now. There are many feedback and suggestion to support ePub file and markdown format.

youtube

Video Title. "Electromechanical Refreshable Braille Module : HackadayPrize 2023" (thumbnail text. "Open-source refreshable braille") Project Description. "Lowering the cost of Refreshable Braille Cells by using Electromagnetic Cam Actuators & 3D Printing"

(Link to "Electromechanical Refreshable Braille Module" project page, on Hack-a-day website)

Note: $10 u.s. for the first braille cell production, but $1 u.s. per subsequent braille cell material. As opposed to the usual braille cell being $100 u.s. or more, with 40-cell displays costing $4k or more. The prototype have 100-200 millisecond refresh rate per dot, but will be improved with driver update in next prototype version, along with more durable material.

Other interesting project.

"Speak To Me: A Button Box" Project Page

Description: "A project to make life easier for my 91 year old father, who has hearing and eyesight loss as well as severe short term memory issues." ("Dad's 'Speak-to-me Button Box'" Showcase video, Youtube)

"OHMni-Stick" Project Page

Description: "Ultra Low Force and Displacement Assistive Tech Joystick." ("OHMni-Stick" entry video, youtube)

Long Range Weather Station (65€) Project Page

Description: "A cheap but precise Weather Station (Lora transmission)" ("Long Range Weather Station" entry video, youtube)

"Felini - Revolutionary Pocket-Sized Electronic Lab" Project Page

Description: "Extremely affordable pocket-friendly, designed to provide a wide range of hardware testing and debugging functions in a compact and low-cost" ("Pocker-size electronic lab" entry video, youtube)

"OMOTE - DIY Universal Remote" Project Page

Description: "Open-Source Infrared Remote Using ESP32 and LVGL"

"FindMyCat - The Open Source Pet Tracker" Project Page

Description: "The only pet tracker you will ever need. Months long battery life, works outdoors and indoors. It’s Purr-fectly Empowered." ("FindMyCat" Entry Video, Youtube)

"A 'smart' controller for a powered chair or bed" Project Page

Description: "Automates the powered recliner or bed. Ideal for the mobility-challenged." ("Power chair and bed 'smart' controller" entry video, youtube)

"mysoltrk - a solar tracker, reinvented" Project Page

Description: "A different approach for a solar tracker, alternative movements, to be installed on the outside, to optimize the efficiency of solar panels" ("solar tracker" entry video, youtube)

"Portable Sound Visualization AR Device" Project Page

Description: "A portable AR device that superimposes an image showing the location of a sound source on an image captured by a camera." ("Sound AR device" entry video, Youtube)

Can see more Projects At:

Prize 2023 (10th anniversary) Projects Submission Page, on "Hack-a-day" Site

Other Contests and Events, on "Hack-a-day" Site

#note: post include 'low cost braille for computer'. 'open source e-reader'. 'accessibility joy stick controller'. and more #text post #o post #accessibility #tech stuff #magz upload #Youtube #described

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hardik-savaliya · 2 months ago

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Brighten Up Your Holidays: The Magic of Permanent Outdoor Christmas Lighting

Hello, holiday enthusiasts and festive decorators!

As the holiday season approaches, many of us are already dreaming of twinkling lights, cozy gatherings, and the joyful spirit that fills the air. This year, why not take your Christmas celebrations to the next level with permanent outdoor Christmas lighting? It's a wonderful way to make your home sparkle and shine, creating a festive atmosphere that lasts through the entire holiday season and beyond.

Why Choose Permanent Christmas Lighting?

Effortless Holiday Cheer Imagine skipping the annual hassle of hanging and un-hanging Christmas lights. Permanent outdoor Christmas lighting systems are installed once and stay up year-round, so you can enjoy a beautifully decorated home without the seasonal setup stress. It’s all about convenience and consistent holiday cheer!

Show-Stopping Display With permanent lighting, your home becomes a beacon of holiday spirit. Whether you prefer classic white lights or vibrant colors, these systems can be customized to create stunning displays that will dazzle passersby and delight your family. You’ll be the talk of the neighborhood!

Durable & Reliable Designed to withstand winter weather, permanent Christmas lights are built to endure snow, ice, and rain. Unlike traditional holiday lights that can fray or fail in harsh conditions, these lights are made to last through the season with minimal maintenance.

Energy Efficiency Many permanent lighting solutions use LED technology, which means they’re energy-efficient and cost-effective. You get the brilliance of holiday lights without worrying about high electricity bills—more money for holiday treats and gifts!

All-Year Festivity While perfect for Christmas, permanent outdoor lighting can also be used for other celebrations throughout the year. Think of it as a year-round investment in home aesthetics and ambiance. From Fourth of July to birthday parties, you’ll be ready to shine.

Tips for a Stunning Christmas Light Display

Plan Your Design: Think about the look you want to achieve. Do you prefer a classic all-white theme or a multicolor spectacle? Decide where you want to place the lights—along the roofline, around windows, or framing your landscape.

Choose the Right System: There are various options for permanent Christmas lighting. Some systems offer customizable colors and patterns, allowing you to change up your display for different occasions. Consider features like remote control and scheduling to make your lighting even more convenient.

Professional Installation: To ensure a flawless and safe setup, consider hiring a professional. They can handle the technical aspects of installation, ensuring that everything is secured and functioning correctly. Plus, they’ll help you avoid the risk of climbing ladders in winter conditions.

Maintenance: Permanent Christmas lighting is designed for durability, but a little maintenance goes a long way. Check the lights periodically to make sure everything is in working order and clean any dirt or debris that may accumulate.

Get Creative: Don’t be afraid to add a personal touch! Incorporate garlands, wreaths, or other festive decorations to complement your lighting. A little creativity can make your display truly unique.

Wrapping Up

Permanent outdoor Christmas lighting is more than just a convenience; it’s a way to make your home a festive haven that brightens up the holiday season and brings joy to everyone who sees it. By investing in a permanent lighting system, you’re not only simplifying your holiday preparations but also creating a magical ambiance that you and your loved ones can enjoy year after year.

So, as the holiday season approaches, consider making permanent outdoor Christmas lighting a part of your holiday tradition. Your home will shine brightly, and your celebrations will be all the merrier!

Happy decorating and merry holidays!

🎄✨💡

#christmas lights #christmaslightinstallation #holidaydecor #permanent outdoor lighting #festiveseason #holidayseason #outdoordecor

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modernscale · 2 months ago

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The Versatility and Efficiency of Hanging Scales: A Comprehensive Guide

Introduction

Hanging scales have long been a reliable tool for measuring weight, especially in situations where traditional floor scales aren’t practical. From markets and warehouses to fishing and industrial settings, hanging scales offer a unique combination of convenience, accuracy, and versatility. This article explores the features, benefits, and various applications of hanging scales, highlighting why they remain an essential tool across different industries.

What Are Hanging Scales?

Hanging scales are portable weighing devices designed to measure the weight of an object suspended from a hook. Unlike platform scales, where the item is placed on a flat surface, hanging scales work by attaching the item to a hook or clamp. The weight is then calculated based on the tension created by gravity, which is displayed digitally or via a dial.

Key Features of Hanging Scales Portability: Hanging scales are compact and lightweight, making them easy to transport and use in various locations, from outdoor markets to remote industrial sites. High Accuracy: Modern hanging scales are equipped with advanced sensors that provide precise measurements, even for irregularly shaped or unevenly distributed loads. Durability: Built to withstand heavy use, hanging scales are often made from robust materials like stainless steel, ensuring longevity and resistance to harsh environments. Versatile Applications: Hanging scales are used in a wide range of industries, including agriculture, fisheries, shipping, and retail. They are particularly useful in situations where space is limited or when weighing bulky or oversized items. Digital Advancements: Today’s hanging scales often feature digital displays, offering easy-to-read measurements. Many models also include additional functions like tare weight calculation, overload protection, and unit conversion. Conclusion: Hanging scales are an indispensable tool for many industries, offering a blend of precision, portability, and durability. Whether you’re weighing produce at a market, livestock on a farm, or heavy materials in an industrial setting, hanging scales provide a practical and reliable solution. As technology continues to advance, these scales have become even more versatile, meeting the demands of modern users while maintaining their core functionality.

#hanging scale in Coimbatore

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reasonsforhope · 2 years ago

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"In the far western desert of Texas, a striking 3D-printed hotel with Swedish style will take shape over the coming years to present both the beauty and savings of 3D printing to the country and the world.

The architecture is handled by Swedish design architect Bjarke Ingels, while the printers will be supplied by Austin-based 3D printing company ICON, that [has] really taken the technology to the next level with 3D-printed batteries and whole neighborhoods besides.

The two are teaming up to transform the El Cosmico hotel/campground in Marfa, Texas, into a 62-acre remote hotel with an infinity pool, art exhibition hall, outdoor bathhouse, and outdoor kitchen, all designed as an homage to both the desert surroundings and the cosmic show on display in the night sky above.

The local West Texas earth is being added to the 3D printing cement mixture to ensure the luxury cabins blend in with their surroundings.

“The promise of 3D printing is that the printer doesn’t care how complex the design is, if it uses organic curvature, dome-like shapes, or hyperbolic paraboloids,” Ingels, an early investor in Icon and a frequent design collaborator on its 3D-printed projects, told AD.

“All it cares about is how long it takes to print and how much material [it is] going to deploy, so you can make a square box or a beautiful domed house at the same cost.”

That cost can be around 30% less than traditional methods, as well as 350% stronger depending on the size and scope of the project.

The hotel rooms will all feature skylights to allow unobstructed viewing of the night sky, and expansive views of the Davis Mountains. Just next door is Big Bend National Park, one of the largest in the Lower 48, and a paradise of desert exploration.

El Cosmico “2.0.” is predicted to begin construction in 2024."

-via Good News Network, 3/27/23

#3d printing #architecture #sustainable architecture #green architecture #solarpunk #environment #cement #construction #big bend national park #texas #united states #sweden #hotel #glamping #good news #hope

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dailyunsolvedmysteries · 2 years ago

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The Honey Island Swamp Monster

Late at night in the depths of the Honey Island Swamp, a piercing and unforgettable cry heralds the movement of the creature. Known to rip out the throats of wild boar and tear elevated hunting camps from their pilings, the Honey Island Swamp Monster serves as a powerful image of what lurks in the marshes, waiting for unsuspecting prey. Legends of a giant beast terrorizing the region stretch back to Native American lore, but modern sightings began in 1963, when two FAA air traffic control men and local outdoors men set up camp in the interior of the marsh’s seventy thousand acres.

Harlan Ford and friend Billy D. Mills, Sr. noticed the potential campsite while flying over a remote area of the swamp outside Slidell, Louisiana. “It was prime hunting territory, and in an isolated area that few people had traveled,” said Dana Holyfield, Ford’s granddaughter and swamp monster advocate. “After he retired, he spent a lot of time at the camp documenting wildlife and eventually the creature we call the Honey Island Swamp Monster.”

Ford appeared on a 1970s television series called In Search Of… and described an unkempt behemoth, over seven feet tall, with scraggly black hair covering its body from head to toe and piercing amber eyes looking out from a surprisingly human-like face. “I thought it might be a bear, and then it turned around,” said Ford. Along with his physical descriptions, Ford produced a plaster cast of an impression of the creature’s foot—a four-toed, web-footed cross between that of a primate and a large alligator.

Because Ford’s account aired nationally, the local legend reached a new audience. “It was monster-mania around here,” said Holyfield. Other area residents came forward to challenge Ford, claiming he and his friends created the swamp monster to secure their hunting territory. Maybe they were bored or wanted to boost the local economy. “Someone had a shoe with a [swamp monster] track glued on the bottom and said they [Ford and his friends] walked around the swamp making the footprints,” said Holyfield.

Ford never stopped searching for the monster but retreated from the public eye following the criticism. His wife Yvonne found a video he recorded in the attic after his death in 1980, grainy 8 mm footage of what looks like a large man covered in hair, walking behind rows of trees in the foreground. The family also found a letter Ford wrote describing his encounters, clearly meant for publication but boxed up along with plaster casts and the video footage. If Ford invented the swamp monster for notoriety or hunting rights, why did he hide the majority of his evidence?

“I don’t care whether or not people believe in the Honey Island Swamp Monster,” said Neil Benson, owner of Pearl River Eco Tours. “There are a lot of things in life that we believe in that we haven’t seen—like God. I don’t know what it was; I just know I saw something that day.”

Benson doesn’t claim he saw “what people call the Honey Island Swamp Monster,” but he described something similar. “I was 16 years old paddling away from my duck blind in a pirogue. I saw something tall moving, unlike any creature I have seen move on two legs through water, unimpeded. It wasn’t a bear. It wasn’t like any man I’ve seen,” he said.

Benson tells the story on his swamp tours when people ask and also keeps a plaster cast of Harlan’s swamp-monster footprint impression, given to him by Dana. The casts have made their way around St. Tammany Parish, gifts from Holyfield to enthusiasts and fellow believers. Another is on display at the Abita Mystery House in Abita Springs, Louisiana.

Museum owner John Preble likens the swamp monster to the ivory-billed woodpecker, a species that hasn’t been formally observed or documented for years and is considered by experts to be extinct. “People tell me they’ve seen the swamp monster and that they’ve seen the ivory-billed woodpecker. The swamp is huge, and there are places where things can hide,” said Preble. “And Dana’s the real deal. When you meet her and hear her story, you believe it.”

Holyfield has spent most of her life searching for the same creature as her grandfather. She has written books and produced documentaries detailing encounters across the Honey Island Swamp. “I do this work because I believe my grandfather’s story. It matters whether or not it’s real because, if it weren’t real, a lot of people living around here would be crazy and have seen things that aren’t there,” she said.

#The Honey Island Swamp Monster #urban legends #unsolved #unsolved mysteries #Cryptoids

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dailyunsolvedmysteries-movedd · 1 year ago

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The Honey Island Swamp Monster

#The Honey Island Swamp Monster #urban legends #unsolved #unsolved mysteries #Cryptoids

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mariacallous · 1 year ago

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Meduza's The Beet: Heels for freedom

Hello, and welcome back to The Beet!

Eilish Hart here, the editor of this weekly dispatch from Meduza that brings you original reporting from across Central and Eastern Europe, the Caucasus, and Central Asia. If someone forwarded you this email, sign up here to receive future issues of The Beet. Want to sample some more of our work first? Check out last week’s story about how independent journalism persists in Turkmenistan. And don’t miss my full interview with Access Now tech-legal counsel Natalia Krapiva, who kindly joined Meduza’s The Naked Pravda podcast to discuss recent revelations about the use of Pegasus spyware in Armenia during the 2020 Nagorno-Karabakh war and its aftermath.

Hundreds of thousands of protesters gathered in Warsaw last Sunday for an anti-government march timed to coincide with the 34th anniversary of the partially-free elections that ushered in the fall of Poland’s Communist regime. With a parliamentary vote coming up in Poland later this year, and President Andrzej Duda now moving to water down a controversial piece of legislation that critics fear will be used to target the opposition, this is something to keep an eye on. But it’s not the topic of this week’s feature. Instead, we’re turning to Warsaw to celebrate the start of Pride Month with a story that takes us inside the Polish capital’s drag scene and introduces us to its late queen, Kim Lee. Journalist Joanna Kozlowska reports for The Beet.

Heels for freedom: Kim Lee and the history of Polish drag

By Joanna Kozlowska

Kim Lee in her Warsaw studio before a performance. 2019.

ZULA RABIKOWSKA

Just over a century ago, looking into the future after emerging from a world war and 120 years of foreign occupation, Poland abolished all aristocratic titles. Later, decades of Communism rendered all thoughts of royalty remote. Yet this year, the Polish capital has crowned a queen, and the choice may surprise some.

A short walk west from Warsaw’s main train station, stepping into the whitewashed mansion that houses a branch of the municipal museum, visitors are greeted by a riot of pastel colors. A black-haired figure in a sumptuous golden dress smiles from a poster near the entrance that reads, Kim Lee. The Queen of Warsaw. The museum’s latest blockbuster offering, the temporary exhibition celebrates an artist lovingly dubbed “Poland’s best and only Vietnamese drag queen,” whose life story is as stunning as the costumes assembled inside.

“Kim Lee had to be real, because nobody could have made her up,” a column in Poland’s largest left-wing daily recently proclaimed. “If she were a character from a TV show, conservative reviewers would tear it apart. More progressive ones, too, might doubt the scriptwriters’ sanity.”

A display from the exhibition “Kim Lee. The Queen of Warsaw.” 2023.

TOMASZ KACZOR / MUZEUM WARSZAWY

Of the half dozen people The Beet’s correspondent interviewed who knew Kim Lee’s creator Andy Nguyen before COVID-19 cut his life short in 2020, all would agree. Nguyen’s story is indeed almost too unusual to be true.

A star student in his native Vietnam, Nguyen came to Poland on a scholarship just as Communism was being dismantled. He got a research job at one of the country’s top physics institutes, only to see his pay fall to a pittance during the economic turmoil of the 1990s. He then worked odd jobs to support himself and his young family. For a time, the former scientist ran a market stall selling East Asian goods that a close friend compared to those at Warsaw’s now-demolished 10th-Anniversary Stadium. (Once the site of Communist Party galas, the stadium was later reduced to a sprawling outdoor bazaar where vendors from all over the former Eastern Bloc hawked pirated software, flouncy underwear, and dubious health remedies).

Nguyen’s drag persona, Kim Lee, was born at the turn of the millennium and soon shot to stardom beyond the wildest dreams of anyone in Poland’s fledgling drag scene. “She whizzed into the mainstream like a meteor,” says Teo Łagowska, a performer with Warsaw’s Drag King Szarm Trio collective.

Nguyen’s long-time partner, Remigiusz Szeląg, concurs. “Kim performed everywhere,” he recalls. “Non-stop, all over Poland, he was a fixture at ‘straight’ parties and club nights, at burlesque shows. He appeared on TV, on discussion panels. He twice gave lectures at the University of Warsaw — needless to say, in full drag.”

Andy Nguyen (Kim Lee) getting ready for a performance in his studio. Warsaw, 2019.

ZULA RABIKOWSKA

Pleasant surprises

Magdalena Staroszczyk, who curated the exhibition in Warsaw, has no doubt that it belongs in a public museum. She is visibly proud of bringing the project to fruition, not least given the Polish government’s enduring anti-LGBTQ stance. “Queer history should be just as present in various institutions as any other [history],” she underscores.

For almost a decade, Poland has made headlines for its ruling party’s dogged defense of “traditional values” that critics say amounts to little more than anti-LGBTQ policies. Successive electoral campaigns have seen the Law and Justice Party intimidate voters with the “rainbow menace,” while top officials — including Poland’s current president and education minister — have suggested that LGBTQ people don’t deserve equal rights. By October 2019, more than 60 local and regional councils had adopted anti-LGBTQ declarations, with right-leaning councilors decrying the spread of an “LGBT ideology” they claim threatens families. Local authorities and Polish courts have since scrapped some of these resolutions (in many cases for fear of losing E.U. funding), but a sense of deep unease remains.

Both Szeląg and Krzysztof Tomasik, Nguyen’s friend of many years and the author of multiple books on Polish LGBTQ history, describe the Warsaw exhibition as a turning point for queer visibility. The show, Tomasik stresses, is housed in a state institution — a clear victory for those calling for greater inclusion, even if the museum’s financing comes from Warsaw’s relatively liberal city hall, rather than Poland’s Culture Ministry.

Staroszczyk, the curator, sees Nguyen’s’s life and work as an integral part of Warsaw’s history. She also notes the artist’s close links to the city’s Wola district in particular, where the museum is located. Nguyen, a long-time resident of the neighborhood, kept more than 1,000 hand-sewn costumes in a space in Wola that became known as “Kim Lee’s Dressing Room.” He also performed in many local clubs, some of which popped up in the district’s shuttered factories.

Nguyen choosing an outfit for a performance. 2019.

ZULA RABIKOWSKA

Nguyen sewing a costume in his studio. 2019.

ZULA RABIKOWSKA

Today, Wola retains a post-industrial feel, with the high-rises that used to house its workers towering over the museum’s Neoclassical pile. Staroszczyk says that neighbors have been venturing in to get what for many is their first taste of drag.

“We have one neighbor in particular, an older lady who I’m told has seen the show several times already. She’s been delighted and has been bringing friends along. That was one of the pleasant surprises,” the curator says.

Groups of retirees — most but not all of them women — regularly book guided tours of the exhibition, Staroszczyk adds.

Local councilors from the Law and Justice Party, meanwhile, questioned the rationale behind the exhibition, while some right-wing and Catholic publications accused the museum of promoting a “deviant lifestyle.” However, as of early June, there has been no sustained political or media campaign against the show, nor protests trying to disrupt it.

On an overcast Saturday in May, the exhibition was well-attended. Groups of visitors admired Kim Lee’s hand-crafted creations — from silk kimonos to voluminous gowns that wouldn’t look out of place in Bourbon-era Versailles — and attempted their own drag transformations, trying on frilly boas and curly blond wigs. Two middle-aged women giggled with delight as they posed before a mirror garlanded with flowers. One 19-year-old visitor named Maciek admitted he’d been surprised to discover that Kim Lee had sold out clubs years before RuPaul’s Drag Race — the U.S. reality competition series that brought drag to a wide audience — premiered on Polish Netflix in the early 2010s.

The opening of the exhibition “Kim Lee. The Queen of Warsaw.” 2023.

TOMASZ KACZOR / MUZEUM WARSZAWY

Polish divas and a whiff of the West

Researcher Jakub Wojtaszczyk, whose book of interviews with Polish drag performers was published last June, says that self-described drag queens began appearing in the early to mid-1990s, not long after Communism’s collapse. Their acts often harked back to Polish “divas” from Communist times: cabaret star Violetta Villas with her layered, feathered gowns, 1960s sex symbol Kalina Jędrusik, who scandalized crowds with her backless outfits, and patrician mezzo-soprano Irena Santor were all clear favorites.

One of the drag scene’s stalwarts, Lady Brigitte, recalls impersonating both Villas and Santor during her performances in the 1990s. She says that many queer men at the time embraced Villas as an icon. “She was a colorful flower, a bright light that seemed to have arrived [in Communist Poland] from America, she was bold and courageous, and above all, different,” the drag queen says.

“Of course, we’d also tackle foreign figures like Cher and Tina Turner — you wanted to have that whiff of the West. But most of each show would revolve around Polish artists,” she explains.

According to Ludmiła Janion, a cultural studies scholar at the University of Warsaw, the history of Polish “queer icons” goes much deeper. As she speaks, Janion pulls out photos of cross-dressing Polish actors from the 1910s, 1920s, and 1930s, one of them the spitting image of U.S. dance pioneer Isadora Duncan. One of the extraordinary performances of that time, she says, comes from the 1937 comedy Neighbors (Piętro wyżej, in Polish). A glittering romp about a feud between two music-loving residents of a Warsaw townhouse, it shows cabaret heartthrob Eugeniusz Bodo wow an audience with his impersonation of the American actress Mae West. “Sex appeal is our womanly weapon,” Bodo sings as he whirls around the stage in a blond wig and a sparkling black dress.

Eugeniusz Bodo (center) impersonating Mae West in the 1937 film “Neighbors”

WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

Some Polish film critics view the scene as a nod to LGBTQ audiences, pointing to the blossoming of queer culture in interwar Warsaw. “Bodo never got married. He wasn’t the type to chase after women,” Janion explains. “Of course, we can’t be sure that he was gay, but he was an ambiguous figure,” she adds, noting the actor’s string of cross-dressing characters during the brief but intense flourishing of Warsaw’s cabaret scene in the early 20th century.

With the advent of Communism, this artistic freedom came to an end. Cross-dressing performances did not disappear, Janion says, but like much else, they retreated to the private sphere; to the semi-safety of high-rise apartments and tipsy evenings with friends. As a result, records of these “clothes-flipping parties” are sparse and hard to find.

The parties themselves might have slipped into obscurity if Kim Lee hadn’t stopped to chat with an older gentleman who’d come to see her show one day in 2008. She soon found out that Andrzej Szwan, 69 at the time, had decades of “clothes-flipping” performances under his belt, even if his ornate costumes had scarcely left his building. With Nguyen’s help, Szwan transformed into one of Poland’s most eye-catching drag queens: Lulla la Polaca. Now 84, Szwan is still performing and much-loved by the media, including Vogue’s Polish edition and the country’s most august opinion magazines.

However, researchers Janion and Wojtaszczyk disagree about whether the “clothes-flipping parties” of Communist times and earlier film and cabaret performances can be classed as drag. Wojtaszczyk would rather reserve the term for modern-day performers who choose to use it themselves, while Janion is happy to speak about “a continuum of drag performances” that involve cross-dressing, an audience, and a note of homoerotic tension.

Andrzej Szwan (Lulla la Polaca) in the 2022 documentary film “Boylesque”

HBO

‘Sister, you’re the activist type’

Lulla la Polaca, for one, was quick to call herself a drag queen once she started performing publicly. She also proudly describes herself as an LGBTQ activist. Most people I speak to agree that the term could also apply to Kim Lee, though not all Polish drag performers embrace it.

“I’d always say to her: sister, you’re the activist type,” recalls Polish drag queen Lady Brigitte, referencing a double act she and Kim put on in the 2000s. Lady Brigitte herself has a more ambivalent attitude towards activism (“I performed at fund-raisers, but they were mostly for homeless animals”), though she expresses admiration for Nguyen’s engagement with Polish LGBTQ groups at the time.

“There must have been more than twenty,” Szeląg replies when asked how many queer rights organizations Nguyen was involved in during his lifetime. He adds that Nguyen was also active in Poland’s Vietnamese community — “although he liked to keep that part of his life separate,” initially for fear of negative reactions to his same-sex relationship and stage persona.

These concerns ultimately proved unfounded, Szeląg maintains. “Poland’s Vietnamese community has undergone a great transformation,” he explains, describing various relatives and friends of Nguyen’s he’s met over the years. “A while ago, a journalist from London came to interview its members for a story. Asked about famous Polish-Vietnamese people, every single one mentioned Kim Lee.”

In Kim Lee’s Dressing Room

PAT MIC / MUZEUM WARSZAWY

Szeląg and Tomasik say that Nguyen didn’t like to dwell on the racist taunts he sometimes faced. Be that as it may, he publicly weighed in on what Polishness could and should mean by starring in a music video that parodied Poland’s infamous 2014 Eurovision entry. “We are Slavic” by Polish singer Cleo and record producer Donatan, with its busty, butter-churning milkmaids and appeals for foreigners to “try Polish women,” prompted a collective groan from the country’s feminists and liberals. Donatan’s comments denigrating that year’s winner — Austrian drag queen Conchita Wurst — only added fuel to the fire.

Kim was not one to sling back insults. Instead, she twirled around a meadow in Polish folk dress, lip-syncing to lines about “hot Slavic blood” and Polish women “ruddy as fresh bread.”

Wojtaszczyk and the drag performers The Beet’s correspondent interviewed also recalled Kim’s role in integrating Poland’s drag scene and raising its profile, whether through hosting “Miss Drag” pageants or judging competitions. Teo Łagowska and Agnieszka Małgowska of the Drag King Szarm Trio — the aforementioned Warsaw collective of female and gender-queer performers who embody mostly masculine characters — stressed that Kim advocated inclusivity within a scene that they say still sidelines groups like theirs.

Nguyen’s untimely death from the coronavirus in 2020 was “a shock for Poland’s rainbow community,” Małgowska says. “We always thought that Kim would become a senior drag queen, like Lulla [la Polaca], that she would dance until the end of time,” she laments.

In Kim Lee’s Dressing Room

PAT MIC / MUZEUM WARSZAWY

Szeląg, Tomasik, and Staroszczyk all spoke of the Museum of Warsaw exhibition as a means of mourning the artist and honoring his memory. Tomasik, the author and Kim’s long-time friend, says that a “terrible sadness” remains, but he also notes his satisfaction that Polish drag is finally beginning to get official recognition. “It’s an art with a decades-long history and its own icons,” he says. “These are just the first attempts to commemorate, remember, and honor them.”

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importanttragedyflower · 2 years ago

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