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sergeant-donny-donowitz · 4 years ago

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The Confession: Cliff Booth x Fem!Reader

Requested by @lababy2727

TW: abusive ex

@tealaquinn @frozenhuntress67 @juxt4p0siti0n @kwyloz

@what-the--curtains @taikawho

*Let me know if you wanna be added to the taglist! :)))

******************** "Well, shit Cliff..." Rick chuckled, leaning against the car door as they drove down the highway after a long day on set. Cliff grunted, though, he couldn't hide a smirk. "You're a damn lucky man, partner." He couldn't forget you. It was your first big role in a Hollywood film. You walked on set, absolutely star struck, though you kept your cool. You wore a bright yellow dress, and a kind smile. You were an actress working on a movie with Rick, and Cliff. You and Rick had to kiss in one scene, and of course you were both professional about it. "It's only acting," Rick laughed a little. It had only been a few days since filming began, but the three of you had hit it off. More specifically, you and Cliff hit it off... And Rick was having a lot of fun pointing out every single chance he got.

Cliff rolled his eyes behind his shades, as he pulled into the driveway. The two made their way into Rick's place to watch Bounty Law, and drink a couple of beers.

"How'd you know?" "Kn-know? Know what?" RIck smirked, knowing damn well what he knew. Cliff grumbled, "Forget it." Rick chuckled, "Whenever Y/n gets you goin', you run off." "I don't run off." "Today sh-she made you laugh too m-much, and you t-told her you had to go b-back to your trailer." "So?" "Cliff, you don't h-have a trailer." "..." Rick went on, "Y/n's a smart kid. She sure as hell knows that." Cliff sighed, "Well shit...She don't know that." "N-no she knows." "Well shit." Cliff shrugged, pretending not to care...but he absolutely did. "Sh-she knows why you said t-that." Rick smirked, though Cliff shook his head, "Y/N's just sweet. That's all."

"Sure. That's all. That's why y-you mentioned her out of the b-blue, huh?" Rick laughed as he popped the cap off another beer. "She might just be worth mentioning," Cliff smirked a little as he opened a beer, and put his feet up. There was a knock on the door, and Rick got up. "Glad you feel that way." Cliff narrowed his eyes, knowing Rick never mentioned anyone else joining them. He opened the door, "Y/n!" Rick greeted you with a bear hug and led you into the livingroom. "Glad you could make it! I was just about to make some margaritas. Y-You want one?" You giggled, not because of your slightly-intoxicated friend, but because you caught a glimpse of Cliff scrambling ot his feet. "Sure thing, Rick." "Alright, you g-go on n' get y-yourself a seat, kid." He winked, noting your reaction at seeing Cliff. You bit your lip, and glanced down as you stammered a little, "C'mon, now Rick." He lit a cigarette with a laugh, "Margaritas' gon' ta-take a while, make yourselves comfortable." He disappeared into the kitchen, and you called out, "Nothing's gonna-" You bumped into Cliff. "Y/n!" "Cliff!" You laughed nervously, but sincerely. You didn't expect him to be there, but you weren't complaining. It was a fun night, with just the three of you... Well...Rick kept coming up with excuses to leave the room, and you didn't quite realize why. Looking back on it...it wasn't much of a mystery. So, a couple nights a week, you'd join Cliff and Rick to watch Bounty Law. Sometimes you'd hang out other days and watch other show. Maybe the Saint, or the Time Tunnel. Whatever was on. Margaritas, Bloody Mary's, beer and cigarettes became a familair sight. Cliff became less standoffish. He stopped running off to his imaginary trailer. You made him laugh and smile like he hadn't done in as long as he could remember. Eventually, you started seeing each other (without Rick around...and he might have been the happiest person in the world when he heard that). Some nights you and Cliff met at Musso & Frank's. Some nights you went by the Santa Monica Pier. Some nights, even if you'd planned to go out on the town, you'd both just stay at your place, make dinner together, or hang around. Months passed, and you were with Cliff and Rick, watching another episode of Bounty Law, when you saw a trailer for your new movie. Clinking margaritas and bloody mary's you celebrated that night. Still, it meant your time working together was coming to an end. Rick sighed with a shrug, "That's Hollywood. Meet nice people, move around, a-and meet more nice p-people." You nodded, though you were just starting your career out, you quickly learned that. You mentioned in passing that you'd landed a part in another movie. You'd start filming in Hawaii in a few days. It'd be a while before you could find the time to watch Bounty Law with them...or do anything with Cliff. Rick asked, "B-but you'll be at th-the wrap up party, tomorrow night, won't you?" You sighed, thinking about it. You really wanted to go, having met so many wonderful people on set....specifically Cliff and Rick. But it was the night you were flying to Hawaii. Still... "Maybe for an hour or two. Don't get your hopes up, boys." You smiled, glancing at Cliff, as you stood by the door. "Bye, darlin'." Rick hugged you, just in case you couldn't go. "Bye, Rick." He chuckled, then glanced between you and Cliff, finding an excuse to leave you alone again. "Y/n..." "Yeah, Cliff?" You waited with a soft smile, and it made him blush...which was not an easy thing to do. Yet you did it so effortlessly. Before he could say anything, you both heard a loud crash somewhere in the house, followed by Rick cursing. Cliff sighed, knowing he'd have to fix whatever it was eventually. He laughed a little, resting his hand against your face, "Good luck out there, kid." You smirked, "I'll bring you back a Hawaiian shirt or two." He laughed again, and his glance lingered on you. "If you can't go tomorrow...I mean..." "Aw, Cliff..." You flung your arms around him, "I'm gonna miss you." He hugged you back, resting his chin on the top of your head, "I'm gon' miss you too..." You left, though you knew there was more on his mind. You also knew that with Cliff, you couldn't push him to say things when he wasn't ready to. He stood by the doorway, as you pulled out of the driveway and drove down the hill lined with houses. He jumped a little when he heard a voice behind him. "You love her." He shut the door, and turned to Rick, who had a smug grin on his face. "She's young, Rick. Big up and coming star. She don't need me." "You're too old for this 'i-if you love her l-let her go' shit, man." "Forget it, man." Cliff shook his head, put his shades on, and his denim jacket, and grabbed his keys. Brandy was definitely hungry, after all. Rick muttered, "Goddamn it." having worked so hard to bring you and Cliff together, and it ended just like that... The next night, you drove down the highway. You sighed with a soft smile, seeing as you had an hour or two to spare. You pulled up to the big mansion, hearing blaring music, and seeing bright colorful lights from the street. You left your luggage in the trunk. You'd only be around for an hour or two, then make your way to the airport. It wasn't long before you spotted Cliff, wearing a bright yellow Hawaiian shirt. "Cliff!" He picked your voice out among the crowd, quickly turning around, with the widest grin you'd seen in your life, as he practically rushed toward you with open arms, "Y/n!" You were only beginning to talk, swaying with the music together, loosely, making each other laugh. "Y/N." You both heard a loud, agressive, drunken voice stagger through the crowd. You muttered, "For fuck's sake." His name was Mike. He was your ex. And he was not happy. He pulled you away from Cliff, gripping you by your forearm. "What the fuck did I tell you about-" Cliff stepped in immediately between you and Mike, with a warning and low voice, "Hey man. Leave her alone." He barely looked at Cliff, "Stay out of this, pal," then looked back at you with glaring, fuming eyes. "We're through, Mike. We've been through for months. Get that through your fat fucking head." He scowled, and lunged at you, but Cliff gragged him by his shirt, slamming him onto the concrete, as people gathered around. Some beginning to pull Cliff away, while others dragged Mike out of the property. As soon as he was out, everyone let Cliff go. He could have broken every bone in Mike's body, but he didn't want to scare you, he didn't want blood on his favorite shirt, and frankly... a drunken asshole of a stuntman like Mike wasn't worth a night in jail. The crowd slowly dissipated, moving toward the bar, the pool, and the music. "Cliff..." He looked at you with a soft expression. You picked his shades up from the ground, though they were broken. You ran into his arms, and he said, "I'm sorry, Y/n. I didn't think-" "No, no you-" He looked at you. Your eyes... He couldn't keep lying to you. So he said what he'd wanted to say from the moment he met you on set. Even if you went on to be a big star, if you moved on, if you forgot about him, he'd never forgive himself for not letting you know this one thing. "I love you." You looked up at him, knowing it was almost time for you to go. You hadn't even left yet, and you missed him already. "I love you, too." He smiled, "You know where to find me." "Friday night, at Rick's." It may take a few months till filming wrapped up, but you'd be there. "I'll bring some beer," you laughed, as he walked with you to your car. He ended up driving you to the airport himself, just for a half hour more with you. You kissed goodbye, and you remarked, "Save one of those margarita's for me?"

He winked with a grin, "You got it, baby."

#Cliff Booth #cliff booth x reader #rick dalton #Once Upon A Time In Hollywood #OUATIH #ouatih imagine #cliff booth imagine

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myveryownfanfiction · 4 years ago

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Chapter 1

I walked into the office the next day and settled into my seat at the desk. Robert walked in and smiled at me as he passed me. Smiling back, I started to get to work. Before I could get started, the camera crew grabbed me for a one on one interview in the annex.

“What do I think of Robert California?” I repeated the producer's question for the video. I thought for a second before smiling. “I think it takes a little while to get used to him. I think that he’s actually really nice and even though he could be a little crass, once you get past it he’s a really nice person who knows a lot about sales and managing.”

“So you got to know him last night?” The producer asked, smiling since they knew they had footage of us leaving the building late.

“Yeah. I got to know him a bit last night.” I laughed. A commotion in the office made me get up and head back out. Kevin was planking on Dwight’s desk and Dwight had enlisted Darryl and Jim in trying to move him. “Guys! Guys! Guys!” I called as I ran out. “You’re gonna hurt yourselves. Chill. Let me handle this.” I walked over to my side of the desk and crawled under. I popped up in the middle and leaned down. “Hey Kev? If you stop planking and get off Dwight’s desk I’ll bring in that chocolate cake you love tomorrow.” Kevin didn’t move and I stood back up. “Ok Kev. No cake for you tomorrow.” I squared my stance and braced my back leg against my desk. “Last chance Kev.” I put one hand on Kevin’s shoulder and one on his hip. I smiled up at the guys that had been trying to lift him as I gave one big shove and Kevin rolled off of the desk. The guys jumped back as Kevin landed with a thud on the floor. Everyone looked up and Robert came out of the conference room to see what had happened. Andy entered the office at that moment.

“What’s going on?” He asked as he took in the scene that was playing out.

“Kevin was planking on my desk.” Dwight said. “(Y/N) solved the problem.” I mock bowed before going back under my desk and popping back up on the other side. Robert was laughing as he went back into the conference room and Andy waved Dwight into his office. I went back to the annex to finish up my interview.

“So yeah. He’s not that bad a guy. He works out of the conference room about half the time. When he takes a break, he does these walks around the office. But you never know who he’s gonna zero in on for these small-talks. Some people just hope it isn’t you. And yet, you hope it is you. Everyone thinks it’s strange.” The producer nodded to let me know my interview was over and I went back out to my desk. I saw Robert was already starting his walk around the office. Today he seemed to have settled on Erin, even though I knew she had only caught his attention because she was waiting for him.

“That’s how every day’s begun, for everyone, since the dawn of man.” I caught the tail end of their conversation and snickered quietly to myself. I watched as Andy came out of his office to save Erin. They were dating, as far as anyone knew, so it was kind of sweet that he was trying to save her. Andy succeeded and the two of them went back into Andy’s office. I started working on my client list for the day when Erin tried to get my attention.

“(Y/N). (Y/N). Psst. (Y/N).” I turned around to see her frantically waving me over. I got up and walked over.

“What’s….” I paused as I looked at the notebook in her hands, recognizing Robert’s handwriting on the page. “Jim. Pam.” I waved them over.

“What is this?” Jim asked as he motioned to the list.

“I don’t know. But I know that if Robert caught us with this, he’d be pissed.” I whispered. I kept looking at the door to Andy’s office, hoping that he could distract Robert long enough so we could figure this out.

“(Y/N).” Jim whispered back as he turned the journal towards me. I cocked my head and gazed at the list of names that was written down both sides of the paper.

“I don’t…” I glanced up at the office door again. “I don’t understand.” I looked up at Jim who just shook his head.

“What are you looking at?” Dwight butt in. I quickly tried to quiet him down so we wouldn’t be caught.

“It’s nothing.” Jim said equally as loud.

“It can’t be nothing.” I shot a glare at Dwight.

“Yeah, it can’t be nothing.” Phyllis backed him up. I sighed and gave in.

“It’s a list of our names, split into two columns.” The office broke into a commotion which I was able to quiet fairly easily. “Okay, just wait one second. I’ll copy it. Do you have a pen?” I turned to Erin who shook her head.

“No. I’ll take a photo of it.” Jim started to pat down his pockets. “Dwight, can you throw me my phone?” Dwight chucked the phone at the wall.

“Nice catch.” Dwight rolled his eyes. I panicked for a second while my eyes snapped back to the office door.

“If he comes out, distract him.” Pam said. Chaos ensued as Robert came out of the office. I walked around the reception desk, desperately trying to think of something to distract him with. I was partly saved by Phyllis falling out of her chair. As Dwight and Robert went to help her up, Pam snuck behind me and put the notebook back where we had found it. Robert smiled at me as he passed.

“(Y/N), I’d like to talk to you after lunch today.” Robert informed. I smiled at him and nodded.

“Whatever you say boss.” I joked as he walked into the conference room. I visibly sagged as the door closed.

“Okay, which side of the list am I on?” Dwight broke the tense silence. I shook my head and sat back my desk.

“Left.” Jim read out.

“Yes!”

“Why are you….” I started to question. “How do you know?” I sat staring at Dwight for a second before we were interrupted by Andy asking what we were doing. Once we explained, he looked over at me with a worried expression.

“Really great list of names guys. Thank you so much. Good work.” He said sarcastically.

“That was in Robert’s notebook.” I informed him as I stood up. I took my place next to Andy before starting to nervously crack my knuckles.

“He left it at reception and we photocopied it.” Pam finished. Andy gave me a look. I just shrugged at him.

“I don’t want any part of this.” Andy shook his head and started to head back into his office. I went to follow him, quietly debating on asking about how his meeting went. I sighed when I heard the rest of the office talking about how it might be a list of people Robert was going to fire. “How could you let them just do that?” I closed the door behind me and turned towards Andy with a frantic look on my face.

“You think if I knew what was going on I would have let them continue?” I whisper yelled at him. “Andy, if I had any idea that was what they were going to do, I would have stopped them. I would have taken the notebook myself and given it right back to him!” Andy sat down in his chair heavily.

“You know him better than I do. What do you think it is about?” I sat across from him and shook my head.

“I don’t know him all that well.” I grumbled. “If I had to guess, it’s a list of high performers and low performers. Jan had one. David Wallace had one. Jo had one. Hell Ryan had one. It would make sense for Robert to have one.” Andy nodded and we sat in silence for a little while. Another commotion in the office caused us to emerge from our little sanctuary.

“This is if we were all on a cruise ship and had to divide into lifeboats. Here’s something. Who would eat who in an ‘Alive’ situation. No that can’t be it.” Dwight was rambling on and judging by Pam and Erin’s faces, he had been going on for a while.

“I gotta say. Kinda seems like the left side’s the side to be on. Me, Jim, (Y/N), Dwight, Darryl.” Andy read off of the noteboard that Jim had set up. “No offense Pam.” If looks could kill, Pam would have killed Andy. I went back to my desk and tried to get some work done while everyone else continued to work on the list. An hour later, they were still at it. Just a little more quietly.

“Did you guys figure it out?” Angela asked as she walked up to my desk.

“We couldn’t crack it.” Andy said, defeated. I rolled my eyes.

“Go in there and just ask the man.” Stanley finally spoke up. I looked up at him to see him nod at me. “Better yet send (Y/N). He likes her already. That makes her more likely to get an answer than any of us.” I shook my head.

“No thanks.”

“Why not (Y/N)?” The chorus took up fairly quickly.

“For that reason.” I shot back. “He likes me. I’m in his good graces. I’m not screwing with that.” I hissed and quickly went back to work.

“Then you do it Andy.” Phyllis suggested.

“He’ll know we looked at his private notebook.” Andy whined. I rolled my eyes.

“Then say you saw the list by accident.” I retorted. Andy glared at the back of my head.

“I’m already working on this Columbus Day thing for you guys and it’s starting to stack up. Feels like al ot. One thing at time.” Andy looked around the room desperately. “Come on, (Y/N). You really won’t talk to him?” I shook my head and mimed zipping my lips. Andy sighed in defeat before going to the conference door and knocking. When Andy came back out, he was upset and switched his name from one side of the list to the other. I raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything about it.

“Looks like I made the right choice.” I muttered. Dwight nodded in agreement. Ten minutes before lunch, Andy tried one last time to rally us around finding out about the list.

“Okay. Robert’s in the annex. Everybody think quick. What do these groups have in common?” I saved my work and started the walk to the annex.

“Maybe we’re supposed to do it with people in our group.” Meredith spoke up. Jim shook his head. “People in the other group.” I rolled my eyes and hung back to listen to the bickering.

“Stanley, you do puzzles all day. What do we got?” Andy tried. I looked at Stanley and waited for his inevitable joke.

“Well, you take the first letter from each name, assign it a number, add them all up and shove it up your butt!” I started to laugh and Stanley turned in his chair to give me a high five.

“Thank you. A little much needed comic relief. But we really need to figure this out guys.” I briefly thought about taking pity on Andy but then decided against it.

“Here’s how we find out.” Dwight stood up and I shook my head as I leaned against the door. “Let’s line up and compare the lines, see if we learn anything. Left-siders over here. Right-siders, line up over here. Face each other. Match it by height and relative weight. Let’s just size each other up here and left side of the list ....” There was a pause. Dwight was waving me over to stand between him and Jim so I just shook my head. Dwight shrugged before turning his attention back to the two lines. “ATTACK!” A couple of the people in line ran at each other.

“Wait, wait, wait! Stop! Stop! Stop!” Jim tried to break up the fight before it started. “Will you stop?”

“Dwight!” Andy tried to reprimand. I pushed off the wall as the door to the annex opened and Robert walked in. He stood next to me and pointed at the chaos. I shook my head as the others started to realize that Robert was in the room.

“I’d like to invite the following people to join me for lunch.” Robert took out his notebook and read from the list. “(Y/N), Jim, Dwight, Angela, Darryl, Kevin, Toby, Phyllis, and Oscar.” I nodded as I started towards my desk and grabbed my keys. “(Y/N), you’ll be riding with me.” I nodded once as I put my keys back on my desk and waited for Robert to grab his stuff from the conference room. It was a quiet journey to the parking lot and Robert waited until everyone else was in their cars. He opened the passenger door for me and waited until I had gotten in before closing it. “I believe I promised you a ride.” Robert slid into the driver’s seat and started the car. He looked at me with a smile as I grinned at the roar of the engine.

“I believe you did.” I responded, showing him my own mile wide grin. Robert smirked at me before reversing the car and tearing out of the parking lot. I let out a small yell of excitement, my hand hanging off the side of the car and my hair being whipped around by the wind. Robert laughed as he watched my excitement of being in a beautiful, fast car. We pulled up to the restaurant and saw the others waiting for us in a small group. Robert slowed down as he pulled into the lot and found a spot. Taking a second, I fixed my hair and got out of the car.

“I take it you enjoyed the ride.” Robert teased as he put his hand on the small of my back and led me to the others. I nodded and put my hand on his shoulder.

“That was amazing! Thank you so much.” I gushed. Robert chuckled as we reached the group and led us to our table. We all took our seats and Robert held out the chair next to him for me. I sat down and thanked him before looking at the menu. I caught Jim’s eye and couldn’t help the blush that formed on my cheeks as he looked at me like he knew something was up. Lunch was full of conversation about the typical life of the office and moved towards the personal lives of the people at the table. By the time we had finished and were finishing our drinks, we were fully immersed in our personal lives.

“Jim, your daughter, Cecilia. What does she think of the street?” Robert asked as he leaned back in his chair and put his arm on the back of mine. Jim’s eyes flitted to me before settling back on Robert.

“Uh, the street?” He asked, clearly confused by the question.

“Sesame street.” I bit my lip to keep from laughing. This man was full of surprises apparently. Robert looked at me briefly before looking around the table, slightly confused by the confused looks he was getting.

“Oh. I didn’t know anybody called it…. She likes it a lot. She loves Elmo.” Jim finally answered. Robert chuckled as he took a drink of his beer.

“Elmo. God’s sake. It’s the Elmo era.” I sent a confused look across the table at Jim.

“Right.” Jim looked back at me with an equally confused look.

“Sesame Street was created to reflect the environment of the children watching it. Complete self-absorption of Elmo is brilliantly reflective of our time. Ours is a cultural ghetto.” He put his glass back on the table and shifted in his seat.

“Yeah, she does like Elmo.” Jim muttered as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Everyone agreed around the table before Toby got up.

“I should not be here. I’m in the. I was in the wrong. I’m sorry.” He apologized as he left. “Just picture me back there. I was never here.” I covered my mouth with my hand as I held back a laugh. Robert caught the action and smiled as he picked up his glass to cover his own laugh. I caught Jim texting under the table and caught his look of panic at being caught.

“Pam?” I mouthed and Jim nodded subtly. I nodded and turned my attention back to the rest of the group.

“You know, I feel comfortable enough now to ask you this question.” Dwight turned towards Robert. “What made you pick this group?” Robert shrugged.

“I just think you guys are winners and I wanted to have lunch with you.” Robert shrugged, which caused his hand at the back of my chair to brush against my back. There was a collective understanding from the table.

“Well, what about the other guys?” Phyllis asked. I nodded as I shifted in my chair.

“Losers.” Dwight cut off Robert. I watched the panicked expression fly across Robert’s face before he tried to compose himself.

“No.” He said, trying to cut off the inherent new class system that Dwight seemed hellbent on imposing once we returned to the office.

“Come on.” Dwight pushed.

“Dwight.” I warned. Robert looked at me before turning back to Dwight.

“I don’t.” He was pulling at straws now, trying to find the control he had at the beginning of the conversation. “I don’t wanna say.” Dwight kept pushing him even though Robert was shaking his head, making me lean on the table to look Dwight in the eye.

“Drop it Dwight. That’s enough.” I ground out. Robert’s hand subtly fell onto my upper back and I straightened up.

“Come on (Y/N).” Dwight teased, sensing the power dynamic between Robert and I. “Let the man answer.” I sighed and squeezed my hands into fists as Dwight won. Robert started to play with the collar of my shirt as he grew nervous about his answer.

“Ha.” He let out a brief laugh. “I guess I think they’re losers.” Catching my eye, Robert bit his bottom lip.

“I knew it!” Dwight exclaimed, gaining a little attention from the rest of the restaurant. “Yes! Woo!”

“Probably shouldn’t have said that.” Robert added, seeing the look on my face. Jim’s jaw dropped and he rapidly texted Pam again. Everyone started to filter out, soon just leaving Robert, Jim, and me at the table. “I really shouldn’t have said that.” Robert told us as he ran his hand down his face. Putting my hand on Robert’s shoulder, I looked at Jim and bit my lip.

“I just want to let you know that when we get back, it’s going to be a mess. Anyone that was at this lunch, aside from the two of us, is going to go completely nuts and run with being in the ‘winners’ group.” Jim said as he stood up. Robert looked up at him. “You will probably have to fix whatever it is that you just created.” I squeezed Robert’s shoulder and raised my hand to say goodbye to Jim as he left.

“Did I just create a massive problem?” Robert asked me. I thought about my answer carefully.

“You did.” I responded. Robert groaned before letting his head fall back. “But,” I squeezed his shoulder again to get his attention. His head lolled towards me. I made sure that he was focused on me. “But it also created an opportunity for you to show Dunder Mifflin just how well you can run it. It’s an opportunity for you to prove that you are right for CEO and that you know how to get people to work harder and better.” Robert lifted his head back up and nodded slowly.

“So you are saying let this play out. Let them fight amongst themselves and step in before it goes too far.” Robert said as it finally clicked. “Then everyone will at least accept me as CEO.” I nodded as Robert took in this information. “Why didn’t I pick you to be manager?” He joked as he pulled out his wallet to pay the bill. I laughed and did the same.

“Because I didn’t want to be a manager.” I said, putting down a $20 bill. I held up my hand when Robert started to protest. “It covers my food and Jim’s. It’s the least I can do.” Robert nodded as he stood up.

“Why pay for Jim?” he asked as he helped me out of my seat and led me back out to his car.

“Because we gave you the least amount of trouble and I know that when we get back he’s going to give you the least amount of trouble.” I shrugged as we neared the car. “Besides, it means he owes me and that might come in handy when there is an issue that Andy, you, or me can’t handle in the office.” Robert laughed as he dug his keys out of his pocket.

“Well put.” His smile grew as he finally got them out. Turning towards me, he held out the keys. “Wanna drive?” I gasped as Robert let the key dangle in front of my face.

“Are you serious?” I asked as I took them. Robert nodded and made his way over to the passenger’s seat. I took my place in the driver’s seat and put the key in ignition. “Are you serious about this?” Robert nodded again with a smile growing on his face. “Absolutely sure?” I asked again. Robert started to laugh. “I’m just making sure because once I drive this car I might always ask to drive it.” Robert put his hand on top of mine.

“(Y/N), I wouldn’t have given you the keys if I wasn’t serious.” I smiled at him. “I especially wouldn’t have let you get in the driver’s seat.” Grinning like an idiot, I reversed out of the spot and took off down the road back to the office. We were still laughing and enjoying ourselves when we walked into the office. Robert automatically went to the conference room while I took my spot at my desk.

“Well, that was certainly an odd lunch.” Jim said. I nodded and tried to keep my smile down. “Is everything alright?” I looked over at Pam, whose eyes were red. I mean she had been crying all day from hormones but it seemed like she had been crying pretty recently. The three of us tried to ignore the other members of the office who were already getting into a fight over the losers comment that Dwight no doubt had already been spreading around the office. I had finally had enough and got up to go into Andy’s office. I caught the tail end of his talking head.

“Metaphorically, of course. But now, it is my job and my prob.” I raised my hand to knock on the door when it opened. “(Y/N)?” Andy took one look around the room and sighed before turning back to me. “Did you need something?” I gestured around the room.

“I was just going to ask you to something about this.” Andy nodded and went to the conference room. He knocked on the door. Robert opened the door and looked between me and Andy.

“Hi, Robert? Can you come out here please? It’s really important.” Andy asked as he stepped to the side so Robert could take his spot next to me. “Just wanted to clarify something. Some people here are under the misconception that some people may be considered, uh, let’s say top-tier and others would be second-tier.” Robert sent a look at me before shaking his head slowly.

“I never said that.” He seemed to be debating his options while Andy took it the wrong way.

“Thank you. Great.” Robert held up a hand and Andy stopped. I bit my lip as I waited for Robert to prove me right.

“I said winners and losers.” Robert’s eyes drifted over me and landed on Andy. “Is that what you’re talking about?”

“Oh, that, it might…” Andy stammered. “That might actually be what I’m thinking of. Can you clarify that?” Robert’s eyes landed on me again and I nodded to tell him to go ahead with what we had talked about at the restaurant.

“Let me tell you some things I find productive.” Robert turned to face the office, confidence easing into his voice. “Positive reinforcement. Negative reinforcement. Honesty.” His eyes met mine again and I couldn’t keep the pride off my face as I watched him take control. “I’ll tell you some things I find unproductive. Constantly worrying about where you stand based on inscrutable social cues. And then, inevitably reframing it all in a reassuring way so that you can get to sleep at night. No, I do not believe that at all. If I invited you to lunch, I think you’re a winner. If I didn’t, I don’t. But I just met you all. Life is long, opinions change. Winners prove me right. Losers, prove me wrong.” He nodded and winked at me. I smirked at him as he went back into the conference room.

“I guess that’s that.” Phyllis said as she went back to work. I nodded and went to sit back at desk.

“No. No. No.” Andy gained my attention again. “(Y/N), the two of us are finally going clear this up.”

“Andy. No.” I said. Andy took my arm and pulled towards the conference room.

“We’re going in there.” He opened the door as I tugged my arm out of his grasp.

“Fine. But I won’t like it.” I grumbled. We walked in and Robert looked up at us as if nothing was wrong.

“I know that every time I talk to you things just seem to get worse. But, you don’t know these people and we do. And if we let you work with faulty information, well, then we’re not doing our jobs as managers. So, please take this pen and change your list.” Andy said. I backed up a couple steps and held up my hands.

“I just want it on the record this is all Andy’s idea.” I said before miming zipping my lips.

“I’m not going to change my list Andy.” Robert smirked at me. “And I don’t use ballpoint pens.” Andy sat down at the conference table while I took a seat behind him.

“Well, then I will make a new list for you.” Andy grabbed a piece of paper and started a new list. “Stanley. You may think he’s a lazy grump, but did you know he has the most consistently high sales numbers of anyone in this office? And you may think he’s hard to love, but did you know that he’s in, not one, but two long-term relationships?” Robert looked over at me and I nodded.

“I did not know about the sales figures.” He admitted.

“Meredith Palmer. Supplier relations. The word no, not even in her vocabulary.” I bit back the smile that was threatening to spread across my face. Andy was finally coming into his own as manager and it was happening before my eyes. “And just to show you that I’m being fair. You had Gabe in the loser column. I think that is astute. Good call.” I chuckled as I nodded. “Pam, easily the most creative and kind person I have ever worked with.” I smiled and looked down at my lap. I could hear Jim and Dwight arguing in the office but I ignored them. “Erin Hannon, the receptionist and my closest confidant. A winner if there ever was one.” Looking back up at Robert, I noticed that he was also trying to keep the smile off of his face.

“Are we done?” He asked when Andy had finally put down his pen.

“Yes.” Andy got up to leave. “No! The Friday before Columbus Day, we’re gonna take a half-day, so that everyone can get a jump on the long weekend.” I watched Robert, waiting to see what he would say.

“You want a three and a half-day weekend for Columbus Day?” Robert looked over at me.

“We’ve always had them.” I stood up. “It just seemed like it would be good business to ask our new CEO before we just up and did it.” Andy nodded beside me.

“And you two are aware that Columbus and his legions committed genocide against an entire civilization of Native Americans.” Robert continued. I nodded while Andy started to walk to the door.

“Don’t care.” Andy left the room and Robert smiled at him as he left. I stood there trying not to laugh.

“I knew that.” I offered as I stood in the doorway. Robert looked up at me.

“Did you?” He smiled. “Did you really?”

“I was a history major.” I winked at him as I left the office. Everyone was packing up already and some people were already walking out. I smiled at Andy as I gathered up my belongings. “Nice work Andy. You’re going to be pretty good at this manager thing.” Andy smiled at me as he locked up his office.

“Thanks (Y/N).” He patted my shoulder. “You’re going to be pretty good at this assistant manager thing.” I smiled as I turned off my computer. “By the way, he likes you too.” Andy winked at me as he left the office. I stood by my desk, mouth agape at Andy’s comment.

“Everything alright (Y/N)?” I jumped when I heard Robert’s voice. I shook my head to clear it and finished up packing.

“Yeah. Sorry. Andy just said something that threw me off.” I chuckled as I put my bag over my shoulder. “You did really well with that little speech.” I bumped his shoulder as we entered the elevator and started our descent.

“I thought I might have messed it up when Andy walked into the conference room.” Robert admitted. I shook my head.

“You did great. Everyone was pretty impressed even if they didn’t want to admit it.” I reassured him. Robert smiled and squeezed my hand.

“Thank you (Y/N).” Robert said as we exited the elevator. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He kissed the back of my hand before heading to his car and taking off out of the parking lot. I got into my car and exited the parking lot myself. Getting home, I went through my normal evening routine. As I lay in bed that night, I couldn’t stop my mind from thinking about what Andy had said and what it could possibly mean. I fell asleep daydreaming about what I wished it would mean.

#james spader #james spader imagine #james spader fanfic #james spader fanfiction #james spader x reader #robert california #robert california x reader #robert california fanfic #robert california fanfiction #robert california imagine #the office #the office x reader #the office imagine #the office fanfiction #the office fanfic

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justasparkwritings · 4 years ago

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Merry & Bright: Your Midnights*

Previous: Till the Morning Light

*SMUT

youtube

Jimin cracks his back, followed by his neck and finally his fingers before he pulls back the duvet and crawls into bed. Resting his back against the headboard, he looks at you. Your hair is falling haphazardly around your face, and he’s quick to move a strand out of your face, tucking it behind your ear. You smile at the gesture, eyes still staring at your phone, where you’re in the middle of reading a New York Times article on the future of American politics, something no doubt, your mother sent to you. Scanning the byline, you’re unsure if it’s going to stress you out or piss you off, so you opt for closing the app and turning ot your husband, who hasn’t stopped watching you since he got into bed.

“Hi,” You whisper, voice stuck in your throat.

“Hi,” Jimin whispers, the warmth in his voice making your heart swell.

“Happy New Year,” You say through your smile.

“It’s not even midnight,” He says, laughing too loudly.

“Shh!” You scold, ears peeling to catch any tiny feet or little cries.

“They’re dead asleep, it’s okay,” Jimin tells you, voice returning to it’s natural timber.

“If they wake up,” You say, eyes finishing your sentence.

“How can I make it up to you?” Jimin asks, slowly leaning his head towards yours, tongue gently licking his lips.

“Do you really want me to tell you?” You meet Jimin halfway, lips excitedly meeting his in a hurried kiss. His lips teasingly move against yours, tongue swiping before retreating, teeth grazing without biting, his hands taunting you as they approach the curve of your ass before retreating, moving up and down your thighs without landing anywhere that you want him, need him. He continues his ministrations, taunting you relentlessly until he can feel your hips starting to buck into his hands.

“My baby’s eager,” He says against your lips before moving further down to your neck.

“Jimin,” You moan softly, the change in his focus bringing some of the relief you’re desperately seeking.

“Do you want more?” He whispers, hands slowly pushing your clean pajama top over your head, freeing your chest to the cool air of your bedroom.

“Yes,” You tell him as he takes in your sight.

“You’re gorgeous,” He says as his eyes take in your body.

“Yeah?” You whisper, insecure as his hands find your skin again. He grinds into you, the pressure of his hardened cock eliciting a moan from both of your lips. “You sure that’s not just the prospect of sex?”

“No, it’s all you, it’s always you,” He tells you, eyes earnest.

“Even after babies?” You ask.

“Especially after babies,” Jimin’s smiling at you, the love he feels for you seems to double or triple every day. From the way you smile at him, to the way you care for your children, or the way your ass looks in your favorite leggings, the ones without the holes or toddler cracker dust on them, or how you toss your hair into a ponytail during playtime, or how you always manage to make time for Jimin, no matter how tired, no matter how exhausted or burned out. Every part of him loves every inch of you, more than the day you met, more than the day he realized he loved you, more than your wedding day or when he realized you’re the love of his life, more than when you welcomed your first child.

Every day starts with you, and he’s the luckiest man in the universe that it ends with you too.

Overwhelmed with his adoration of you, Jimin doesn’t waste any more time sliding your underwear off and burrowing himself between your legs, where he does make a show of edging you gently and repeatedly until you swear if you don’t cum you are going to cry, and cry you do as Jimin moves from between your legs to behind you, where he pulls your back flush to his chest. He lifts your leg over his hip, opening you to him, and sinks himself into your cunt, bottoming out as his free hand moves instantly to your clit, the oversensitive numb begging for release. As he begins to thrust, pace aggressive, you’re both so glad you got a new IUD placed as soon after giving birth as you were allowed, a method that hadn’t failed you after your first child and wouldn’t fail after your second.

It doesn’t take long for you to come undone, the edging Jimin had inflicted upon you and your clit would you tighter than you’d realized, making it almost impossible to not yell as you came undone around him. Feeling your walls tense around him, Jimin snapped his hips faster, his moistened fingers moving to pinch and twirl your nipples, his teeth digging into your shoulder.

Your voice could be heard in hushed whispers, encouraging Jimin to fuck you deeper, to go harder, to use this as practice in case you ever wanted another kid (you didn’t). It was all the encouragement he needed to hit his release, his teeth disappearing as his lips sucked your skin, moan echoing into your bones.

It takes a few minutes for you both to regain any sense of composure, and you diligently hobble to the bathroom to pee and grab a damp washcloth, which you use to clean up Jimin.

“Aein, you don’t need to clean me up,” He says, hand on your wrist as you try to move it against his upper thigh. “Please, let me.”

You nod, your mothering instinct hard to suppress. “Okay.”

Jimin smiles at you, pressing a kiss on your cheek before he cleans himself up and rises. Glancing at his watch, he notes that it isn’t quite the new year yet. After tossing you a new pair of underwear, and slipping his own on, he disappears from the bedroom. You rise, staring at your sheets, trying to decide if you wanted to toss them in the wash today or just wait until tomorrow. Too exhausted to care, and noting that no cum means it’s clean enough to sleep on.

Crawling back onto your side of the bed, you pull the blankets around you and glance at the mess of your master. Clothes lingering, both adult and child sizes, a few baby books and a burp rag or two draped over your armchair from late night feeds with your seven month old, a rarity now as they were outgrowing them. You note the sippy cup and two bottles sitting on the bookshelf and side table next to the chair. In childless times, you’d exited your en suite to find Jimin sitting in said green velvet, tying the laces to his dress shoes or adjusting his cuff links. Other times, you’d made out in that chair, on a particular winter evening you’d blown him, how circle of life for it to be your second favorite place to cuddle your child in the light of the moon.

Jimin returns, a tray in his hands. He’s gathered a few Christmas cookies, two flutes of what looks like ginger ale, and refilled your favorite water bottle which you’d left downstairs. He sets it gently on the bed before crawling up next to you.

“It’s almost 00:00,” He says, gentle kiss placed to your temple.

“And you’re gonna be happy,” You sing softly, shoulder nudging him as you grab a flute, engraved with your wedding date. A gift from Taehyung that you adored.

“I’m always happy,” Jimin can’t stop smiling as he clinks his glass against yours.

“Oh really? Even though we’ll be cleaning up bottles together on New Years Day?” You ask, sipping the sparkling liquid which is in fact ginger ale.

“Baby bottles, and sippy cups,” Jimin clarifies.

“How lame, it’s almost a new year and we’re sipping ginger ale, eating Christmas cookies, hoping our children don’t wake up,” You snort nibling on a cookie.

“We did finish that bottle of wine,” Jimin corrects.

“That we opened on Christmas,” You say.

“Fair point,” Jimin nods taking another sip of his ale. “We did just have great sex, and an amazing dinner.”

“Also true,” You nod, eyes taking in his post sex look. His hair is blonde again, your favorite, and in its post sex state, it’s both pushed back and messy. His lips, always pink, are swollen from yours, and his eyes are both blown and tired. Five years of parenthood has permanently clouded them, and there’s something extra there that only comes from making love to you.

“I’m happy cleaning up bottles,” Jimin starts, setting his cookie down, “and sippy cups, and burb rags and dirty diapers, so long as I get to spend the new year cleaning up with you. I’m happy to do anything as long as it’s with you.”

“It’s 00:00,” You tell him. “Happy New Year.”

You lean in softly to place a kiss on Jimin’s lips, this time it’s soft and loving, kind and adoring.

“I’m happy to do anything with you, too,”

Next: Jackpot Question

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pbandjesse · 3 years ago

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I am glad to be in my bed. I feel sad I will be leaving again tomorrow. But also I am excited to see my parents and Jess and do some wedding stuff. Its exciting! Scay and exciting.

Today was pretty good but I had a lot of trouble falling asleep and then I was just really tired when my alarm went off. But I had to get up and get the theme stuff together. And I felt anxiety about today but it was fine. It all worked out. I had the idea of making the theme project just having the kids try to collect as much trash as possible in little paper bags. A leave it better than you found it type thing.

And I ended up having just a little more plaster then I needed. So I didn't have to stress. But still.

I got breakfast and just brought it with me to the craft lodge. Because I wanted to be alone. I had my breakfast but I didn't love it. I got myself together. I laid in the hammock for a bit. But then the kids were here!

The little littles were first. They are just so stinking cute. And they did a great job. I had much better luck with the plaster not breaking and everyone ot really good casts. So it was a lot of fun. I also had some kids sewing today and that was nice. I had some of the 7 year olds on the sewing machine. And I had a few boys embroidering. It was fun. It was a good day.

We had grilled cheese for lunch. And I got to meet Lauren's boyfriend. He was very nice. Lauren and him would come and help me cut fabric It was very helpful.

I only had one more group after that and it was a nice one. I got to work on my loom because they were chill and I taught a few of them to make loom bracelets. I had a good time.

Once they left I worked on cleaning. I washed the hammocks. And I move the carpets. The boys came back to get t-shirts and ended up helping me shake them out. I swept and finished packing my stuff. And then it was basically time to go to the office. I went and headed down with some of my stuff. Hung out with friends. Told jokes about eating horses. I got a gift card for being the counselor of the session. Pretty great. A camper who was leaving today me he thought Charlie was my boyfriend an I got to tell Charlie that and it was very funny. James would later pretend they were gonna fight about it. It was all in good fun.

There was a lot of waiting but we were all just on the porch having a good time. Joking. Telling stories. And they got us dinner. And James was there!! It was all so nice.

They had chicken, I had mac and cheese and a little salad. And once we had finished eating we headed out. I was happy to go home. We made a pit stop for gas. And I had trouble keeping my eyes open on the drove back. But we were home soon. And I had so much mail! So exciting. I hugged on sweetP and opened my packages and put things away. I packed up my bag for tomorrow. I packed heels for trying on dresses. And then I took a long bath.

Now I am laying in bed with James and having a snack. I am ready to close my eyes soon. Tomorrow is going to be a long day.

I will be leaving around 8, and I hope its a quick and easy drive out. Im nervous for tomorrow. So send me some good vibes. Goodnight everyone!! Wash your hands!!

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eyesfixedonthesun22 · 5 years ago

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New Year’s Eve

Summary: Steve and Peggy have a good friend who’s a handyman that comes and helps you out. Pairing: Butcher/Handyman!Bucky x Female Reader Warning(s): Pure fluff. Widowed Bucky. Word Count: 2,711 Notes: This is my entry to @nacho-bucky‘s writing challenge! My prompt was “The smell of cologne on warm skin”. Thanks for hosting darling Cait!

“Do you need any help washing the dishes?” Peggy calls from your living room. Her and Steve lay sprawled across your couch, fire crackling and spitting in the hearth, spilling warm light in the otherwise dim room.

“I’m okay. The water pressure is still on the fritz. It takes so long to do them that I’ll end up doing most of them tomorrow.”

“It’s still-hic-broken?” Steve asks while rubbing his belly hoping to relieve some of the tension.

You can’t help the soft chuckle. He always got belchy when he overstuffed himself on your chicken pot pie. Tonight was no exception.

“The kitchen sink pressure is busted. The light switch for the second bedroom doesn’t work, my shower scalds me randomly. Ah the joy of owning an old house with charm.”

You’d moved to the small cozy town in upstate New York two years ago. Peggy and Steve lived a couple blocks away. After realizing that you and Peggy both worked at the same hospital, the two of you had become fast friends and Steve came along with her. You were a nurse at the town’s Veteran’s Affairs Hospital, and she helped coordinate the hospitals volunteer department. You were frequent visitors at each other’s homes for dinner.

“Really hun you should get those fixed.”

“I know. I’d fix it myself but electrical and plumbing are where my homemaking abilities stop.”

“I know someone who could help.” Steve chimes in. “I think he’s free tomorrow. He usually takes Sunday’s off from the shop and does some handyman work on the side. I could text him?”

You pause for a moment contemplating. Normally you’d balk at hiring help but if Peggy and Steve endorsed this handyman then he was trustworthy enough to let into your home where you lived alone. Probably kind enough not to comment on any mishaps you’d made in maintaining on your own either. Besides, you weren’t getting anywhere solving the issue on your own. You kept telling yourself that you’d set something up on your days off or take a look at it after your shifts. That had been happening since you’d moved in.

“Fine. Send him over.”

****

“The sink first? No, the shower?” You scratch out your writing and reorder the to do list on the house once more when a firm knock nearly startles you out of your seat.

You aren’t sure what you’re expecting when you throw the door open in the late December cold, but it certainly isn’t James Barnes.

He’s a tall man. Nearly appearing to fill your doorway before you invite him in. While he takes off a bright red knit cap and gloves, you take a moment to study him further. He folds the hat and gloves with a delicate reverence and large calloused hands before tucking them both inside the pockets of his jacket.

The planes of his face are that of a different era somehow. Softer. His full cheeks are flush and rosy. A stunning compliment next to the blue of his eyes. The brunette hair that was previously hidden by the winter hat falls nearly to his shoulders and curls at the ends ever so slightly. He’s clearly a strong man but it’s blanketed by a soft belly that strains the waist of his pants where his flannel is tucked.

“James, right?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He stands politely in the entryway of your home glancing around a moment before you realize he’s waiting for instructions. “Steve said you needed some help with plumbing and electrical work.”

“Ah yes! I made a list but I’m not sure what will make the most sense to start with.” You start towards the kitchen but don’t hear any footfalls behind you. “James?”

“I only have my boots,” he says plainly while staring at the footwear. “They’re covered in snow. I don’t want to track it in.”

“Just leave them by the door.”

You could have sworn you saw the rosy blush in the large man’s cheeks deepen. There was something strangely intimate about seeing him pad towards you in his woolen socks, toolbox in hand.

You’d shown James your list and it had been as if his entire demeanor had shifted. He asked you quick questions, took notes, looked at and studied the defective appliances. Gone was the shyness. Instead was a confidence and assuredness you found pleasing. You found yourself wondering why you’d waited so long to get these things fixed in the first place.

The afternoon had gone by with light snow flurries falling on top of the white blanket already coating the ground. You lit a fire once more and baked some molasses cookies. It was a warm spiced recipe you hadn’t had since your childhood. The task gave you something to do with your hands while a stranger roamed around in your bathroom; dangerously near your shampoo. When the cookies were iced you found yourself placing a small pile onto a smaller plate and walking to the bathroom.

“Cookies?”

“These look wonderful.”

He wipes his hands clean and before you can blink, he inhales two of the cookies. “These are the best cookies I’ve ever tasted.”

“I think you’re flattering me.”

“I’m serious! My wife wasn’t much of a cook. She used to burn nearly everything. I had to do most of the cooking, or we went over to Peggy and Steve’s. Before they moved up here of course.”

“I can send the recipe home with you. So, she can try to bake these.”

You aren’t sure what you’ve said but his face falls for a moment before regaining a small sad smile. “I’ll take the recipe, but she won’t be baking them I’m afraid. My wife, Natasha, she passed away five years back.”

“I’m so sorry, James. I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay. Steve doesn’t talk about her much. He took it really hard. Blames himself. They used to work together you see.”

You absently grab a cookie to avoid saying something else foolhardy. These two years with Peggy and Steve and not once had they mentioned James nor his wife Natasha or this past life. Some wounds must really run deep.

“You’re in your head,” James says nudging your shoulder. You hadn’t realized how close the two of you had gotten in the small space. At this range you could smell his cologne. There was something woodsy about it. Like clean pine needles and amber. You found yourself knowing he’d be wonderful to be wrapped up in on a cold day like today while the snow falls in front of your fireplace. You cursed yourself for the indulgent thought after just learning the fate of his wife.

His smile warms you once more. “I’ll have to come back. The plumbing tasks were more complicated than I anticipated, and I’ll need to go pick up parts. Does tomorrow work for you? I know it’s New Year’s Eve, but Steve said you were eager for it to be fixed.”

“I’m gonna kill that man when I see him.”

“I know the feeling.”

James’s laugh was one you felt reverberate from deep down in his chest. The thing seemed to fill him up and warm his cheeks once more from the inside.

“I’m free tomorrow.”

***

This time when James knocks on your door you’re ready for the blue of his eyes to knock you off your feet. He nearly bounds through the door; following a similar routine as the day before. He folds the red hat and gloves neatly and places them in his jacket pocket, but this time removes his boots and sets them confidently on your shoe stand.

“I was thinking of getting started on the kitchen tasks if that’s okay with you.”

***

“Oh shit. Shit shit shit.”

“Everything okay?” James voice sounds from the cabinet under your sink.

“Well Peggy and Steve asked me if I’m willing to cook this very specific dish for their New Year’s Eve party and I said yes a while back, but I’d forgotten about it until now.”

“And the party is tonight. And all the stores and closed.”

“How’d you guess?”

“Well first, it is New Year’s Eve. And second, I’m going too.” He pauses sheepishly enjoying your mild panic. You hurry about the kitchen opening and closing various cabinets trying not to trip over his tools that are scattered in front of the sink. “What if I finish up here and then you come down the shop and I’ll let you get what you need there?”

“The shop?”

You vaguely remember Steve saying that this was something his friend did in his spare time, but you hadn’t paused to ask what his primary job was.

“My butcher shop. I own the shop on the corner of Miller and Melrose in town.”

“The really beautiful one? Blue and white building? Red letters?”

“That’s the one. But really, it’s nothing. Plus, then I can say I helped and then my store-bought cookies won’t seem like such a consolation dish.”

“Deal.”

***

The shop is dark and quiet; closed for the New Year’s holiday. You’d made several protests on the drive over to James about the inconvenience, but he’d shrugged them all off.

“What’s the point of owning a grocery and butcher shop if I can’t help out my friends when they’re in need,” he said with a bright grin before disappearing into the back room to get you the cuts of meat you’d ask for your braised short rib recipe. You wondered when he’d crossed from your handyman into friend. Then again, he’s Steve and Peggy’s friend. And he is awfully easy to talk to. Perhaps he is a friend already.

You quickly threw everything you needed into your tote. His shop was small but well stocked with everything you needed. You hesitated at the small old-time cash register. Surely, he’d let you pay. He had to. You set the bag on the counter and, against your instincts, go behind the counter and into the back room.

“James, I need to know how much I owe you. Come ring me up?” you joke.

Your laughter is cut off slightly when you find him hunched over a large stainless-steel table, clad in a black rubber apron, slim sharp knife in hand and a full side of beef on the table. He’s at work slicing and cutting.

It’s a grace you’d never have guessed his large frame and calloused hands capable of possessing. Before, you’d seen the brute strength he’s capable off with the other chores at the house, but this was different. Each stroke was deliberate. Each knick, precise. He could have done this with his eyes closed.

“Just the short ribs or did you want some extras for later in the week for yourself while I have this out.”

You startle a bit clearly engrossed in watching his hands make quick work of the animal. “You really didn’t have to get this all out for me. I feel horrible.”

“Well I knew the boys had already closed up last night, holiday and all. I don’t mind. Really.” His blue eyes finally look up from the knife work into your own. “Let’s get you some steaks and stew meat.”

“Are you coming over for pot roast and steaks?”

“Is that an invite?”

It was hard to guess who was blushing more.

***

“I’m gonna need to be here in the kitchen while you work if these are going to be done on time for dinner. Is that okay?”

“Of course. It’s your house, doll. Besides, I’m nearly finished and I’m sure the smells will be amazing.”

You go along slicing the onions and searing the short ribs until they’re caramelized a deep brown on the outside. The onions get added and a hefty amount of garlic next. It’s about this time that James pops his head out from under the sink.

“All done. Plus, that smell is heavenly. What is it?”

“Garlic and onion.”

You add in the red wine to the heavy bottomed dutch oven and throw the dish into the oven for the next two hours. It’s shockingly easy to pass the time with James until the short ribs are done. The only difficult thing is swatting James away from the oven from “checking” on them every twenty minutes or so.

Steve and Peggy only live a short walk away but it’s blustery cold and halfway down your block you can feel your ears are stiff and red with chill. James has offered to carry the dutch oven full of short ribs and you carry his box of cookies.

“You didn’t bring a hat. Did you?”

“I’ll be okay. The walk isn’t far.”

He sighs before stopping and setting the crock on the sidewalk and removes the knit cap from his head. His mitten covered hands don’t give you a chance to voice your protest before he’s dragging the material onto your head and over your ears. In seconds they could scream thank you for having a barrier to the wind.

“Thank you, James.”

***

“Why are you wearing his hat?” Peggy exclaims before you can get your whole body through the door.

“Because my ears nearly fell off my head?”

“That’s the hat Natasha knitted him. He nearly went on a murderous rampage when he left it on a city bus one time. I know you don’t quite comprehend what that means but it’s serious.”

You glance across the room looking at James.

He’s engrossed in a conversation with Steve. His plump cheeks are a pink as ever. You’d learned that it never really goes away. You found it rather endearing. He looked beautiful with a flush on his skin. Steve must have said something funny because James’s little belly jumps up and down with each chuckle that tumbles from his lips. He certainly doesn’t look like someone capable of murderous rampage.

“I’m starting to think that maybe Steve should have suggested Bucky’s handyman services sooner.”

“Bucky?”

“His nickname.”

“Yeah well...so am I.”

***

The dinner party is small. New Year’s is rung in with drinks, laughter, and friends. Everyone enjoyed the braised short ribs and even Bucky’s (you’d teased him calling him this for the first time) cookies got sufficiently nibbled on.

“Can I walk you home?”

“Is James walking me home or is Bucky?”

You can’t tell if it’s the party jubilations, but you swear you see an eye roll as he playfully pushes you towards the door and your hosts. Steve wraps you in a massive hug, Peggy plants a kiss on your cheek and everyone says their goodbyes and Happy New Year’s.

The blustery wind from before has died down and the snow falls in delicate flakes undisturbed except from your footfalls. The world seems blanketed in a cold snow globe of silence.

“You know you had to walk back to my place anyway, right?” You finally break the silence. “Your truck is there, ya goof.”

He slips an unmittened hand into yours before saying, “Yeah, but I wanted to anyway.”

“Peggy told me about your hat and gloves.”

“Natasha took up sewing and knitting. She was good too; quick with her hands, I guess. She wanted to have a repair shop one day. Said she liked that being a seamstress almost always meant putting things back together and being a fixer.”

“That’s a really beautiful way to look at it. I managed to learn sewing pretty well but knitting I never mastered. Natasha must have been a special lady. I could only manage straight lines and barely that. There’s a graveyard of Frankenstein mittens lurking somewhere upstairs at my place.”

With that you earned what was becoming one of your favorite sounds; his booming laughter.

James comes in at the promise of a hot toddy; as repayment for saving the day. The two of you are sat in front of the fire on your couch when, in a stroke of boldness, you pull his arm over your shoulder. Leaning into his side you can once again smell his cologne wafting off the warm skin from his neck; sweet amber mixing with the bourbon and cinnamon of the drinks and something deeper.

“Is this okay?”

He sighs a contented sound and nuzzles you closer into his soft side. “This is okay.”

#nachobuckychallenge #Bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes #bucky fluff #my writing #my fics

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halowastaken · 4 years ago

Text

Why I Left (chapter8)

read it in ao3!

Summary:

“You are kidding, right?” Peter just shook his head slowly “Kid I’ve offered you multiple jobs here, paid internships, you could be one of the board members if you wanted to and you know that. If you’re looking for a job, please, I beg you, work here” Tony insist “My answer is gonna stay the same” Peter says rolling his eyes “Peter I will literally pay you for doing what you already do. I don’t beg for absolutely anything and I am begging you” Peter raises an eyebrow “If I wanted to work in a bigass tech company, I would definitely work for Hammer Tech” Peter teases

----

He skipped school the next day. Spent the whole night coding. He figured it out. However at this point the coding would be considered as 'hacking' by experts. Peter Parker, a sixteen year old from Queens, managed to hack FRIDAY and Karen overnight with nothing else other than his laptop, a single can of redbull, and a broken heart. He didn't feel good but he didn't care. The only person that he fully trusted stabbed him in the back. There were lots of emotions involved. He feels like he deserved it, because of how bad he is, he also feels betrayed for obvious reasons, he is mad because he let himself be fooled by it, but right now? He was numb. He had just one goal and it was to make the code unbreakable. And he was gonna get there no matter what. After all Tony Stark was the guy that taught him how to code. It took time but he got there eventually. When the protocol is activated, every live information will stop till it’s deactivated. That way, nobody can track him or know his vitals or contact him. Like he is gone. Now it was part two of the plan. Peter is going to tell everything to Tony and then disappear. He had to wait till next thursday but it was just a matter of time. When Thursday finally arrived, Peter immediately went to the Tower right after school. He didn’t even tell Happy that he was gonna swing his way there. When he arrived there Peter opened his room’s door and changed his clothes. Then went down to the lab without saying anything to FRIDAY. Tony was predictable enough to know that he is in the lab “Mr Stark” Peter says announcing his presence in the lab. Tony just cringed when he heard Peter “Cut it out kid. You know you can call me Tony” Peter just rolled his eyes “There’s something important I need to tell you, Mr stark” Tony turned around and smiled. A really comforting smile “Sure kid. Just ask for anything. Consider it done” And that’s when it clicked. “I may not be coming here for a few weeks” Peter days looking down. Tony’s smile dropped “What? Why? What happened?” Tony asks “May said that because I am sixteen should start helping them financially so I am going to get a job” Tony blinked at Peter’s answer “I even have an interview tomorrow as a photographer for the daily bugle” “You are kidding, right?” Peter just shook his head slowly “Kid I’ve offered you multiple jobs here, paid internships, you could be one of the board members if you wanted to and you know that. If you’re looking for a job, please, I beg you, work here” Tony insist “My answer is gonna stay the same” Peter says rolling his eyes “Peter I will literally pay you for doing what you already do. I don’t beg for absolutely anything and I am begging you” Peter raises an eyebrow “If I wanted to work in a bigass tech company, I would definitely work for Hammer Tech” Peter teases “I am gonna pretend you didn’t just say that. But please kid. Working here will look beautiful in a college application. And you won’t even need an interview. I have had the paperwork in my nightstand for a while now. You just need to sign it” Tony insists “I don’t think you got the part of ‘helping financially’ you know?” Tony glares at him “If you want a million dollars the minute you can just tell me. You say a number, I’ll make it happen” Peter raises an eyebrow “Tony, I really don’t feel comfortable working for you” Peter says. That doesn’t stop Tony “Thirty dollars the hour for every time you come here” Peter’s eyes widened “Tony! That is a lot of money! As in ‘more than the average teenager salary’ a lot of money!” Peter says “I can make it more if you want too” Tony adds “You know what? I’ll sign the damn paper if you don’t do that and just shut up so we can finally finish that damn robot” Peter says and Tony ruffles his curls “I’ll go look for the paperwork” And that is how Peter got away with it. Peter knows Tony enough to know that if he was looking for a job, Tony wouldn’t stop till he accepted any kind of job offer. Also, he knows that Tony will start to suspect something if he accepted right away, so he played hard. Tony had become predictable. That’s what got him. When Peter came home the next day, he told Ben that he got a job and that he quitted the internship. He also hid the MIT sweater right next to where he hides his spidersuit. Nowhere to be found. And the code? Peter called the protocol the ‘sicko mode’. It worked like a charm. If Peter didn’t know better, he would say that Tony would be disappointed. Ben would also be disappointed. May would be disappointed. But he knew better. Tony really didn’t care about him, and obviously Ben didn't either and May is not around. Even if she was, Peter highly doubts that she ever cared. In school this whole charade was harder. MJ’s been skeptical since the beginning but she hasn’t taken action, but that means that Ned is on her side because Ned knows that MJ is always right. Actually everyone knows that. “I am just asking, ok? If there was something going on in your life, you would tell us, right?” Ned asks and Peter rolls his eyes “Yep. I am fine guys. I swear” Peter says for the fifth time just since they entered the cafeteria “Are you coming to decathlon practice then?” MJ asks and Peter sighs “I told you I can’t. Mr. Stark needs me in the lab” Peter says, you know, like a liar “You’ve gone to ‘the lab’ everyday for two weeks now. The team needs you, loser” MJ says frustrated. Peter knows that. He knows perfectly well that without him the team could lose. “I am sorry. I promise I will tell him that I need a break from the lab” That was another lie. MJ sighed “Forgive me if I don’t believe you” MJ says going back to her book “I forgot! My mom bought the baby yoda Lego set!” Ned said changing the subject “Dude! No way! How many pieces?” Peter says excited “A thousand and seventy three! We gotta do it soon!” Ned says getting more excited “You two are actual losers. That’s why nobody hangs out with you” MJ says without looking up from her book “You hang out with us” Peter says raising an eyebrow and MJ scoffs “Do I?” MJ asks. Sometimes she can really be weird. Peter still liked her. He has to admit that after Liz, Peter had a crush on her, but he prefers being just friends now. The last thing he wants to worry about was his lovelife Truth is today didn’t suck. At least school didn’t. Right after school Peter went to the alley and got changed there. "Hello Peter" Karen says and Peter smiles "Hey Karen. Initiate 'sicko mode' please" Peter says shooting the first web to the building in front of him "Sicko mode activated. All live connections were cut" Karen says making Peter smile in sign of satisfaction "Thanks dear. So, what do you have for me?" Peter asks "There's a woman being robbed two streets to the left" Karen informed. It was gonna be a long night. Patrolling at night was ten times better. Peter loved seeing all the lights at night ot New York. He could enjoy the beauty of the only place in the world he knows. And the people that lived there were not the biggest fans of Peter, but they loved Spiderman. They needed Spiderman. Spiderman was the kind of hero that you can reach out when you’re being mugged or something like that. Something in the friendly neighbor level. Even though Peter knew he could do more he prefers laying low till it’s necessary. While Peter was patrolling in the other side of the city, there was our favorite man of iron in the lab not really doing lab "So you hired peter but decided to not tell May" Pepper asked "I forgot! And I am gonna tell her, ok? She will be proud of him, as she should" Tony says grabbing his phone "Can you put it on speaker?" Pepper asks and Tony just smiles and does as she asks. It took awhile for someone to answer the phone and Tony was disappointed when someone did answer "Who are you and why are you calling this number?" Tony and Pepper looked at each other when they heard a very not so chill Ben “Mr. Parker. This is Pepper Potts. Can I please speak to your wife for a second?” Pepper asked before Tony could say anything “Is this some kind of joke?!” Ben asks almost yelling “Uhh no? We want to talk to her about Peter” Tony clarified. After a few seconds Ben just sighted “Whatever he did, I will talk to him later. Have a nice day” Before Tony could argue back Ben hung up on them Pepper and Tony looked at each other thinking the exact same thing. There is something going on.

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amelink66world · 4 years ago

Text

Love of my Life

Hey guys!! This is the fourth part! Enjoyy💞

New York (part- 1)

Amelia's PoV:

I've never felt better. I mean, I'm having aerobic sex. Like hot, athletic, aerobic sex. I'm waking up with endorphins almost everyday. Link is truly a God, not only an Ortho God but Sex God too. I laugh at my own words. He has successfully managed to make me giddy! I start acting like a freaking teenager. I'm in not in some stupid high school. I have to get my bearings under control.

Yet the first thing I do after changing into my scrubs is go over to the nurse's station in search of Link. My brain is screaming at me to not get attached but my body is functioning in it's own accord.

Link's PoV:

I suddenly have become some sex-crazed teenager who cannot get little Link under control. I now have a high sex drive and it's all her fault !! Just thinking about her makes me lose my mind. Hearing her voice solely brings back all the memories of our... ahem...ordeal. Her moans in my ear, her breathlessness, the way I make her scream my name, how she holds on to me for fear life while reaching the peak, her lips, her tongue on my...Shush!! STOP IT. JUST. STOP. IT. I'm not a freaking horny teenager!! I have to get her off mind. I need a looong surgery on my hands.

I'm the king of hypocrisy. Only today I was determined to lessen the amount of hot, athletic, hot, hot sex yet here I am going at it again with Amelia. Only the location keeps on changing. I think by the end of the month, we would have christened the whole freaking hospital!! Currently both of us are putting on our scrubs back, trying to catch our breaths, ready to kick start our day with a much much better mood than we woke up in the morning in. We nod and smile at each other before leaving the on-call room discreetly.

In the middle of the day, Link was paged to Conference Room 1. He looked at the page quizzically. Why was he being paged there? I hope it's not Amelia. Surely she doesn't want the hospital to be the audience to us doing it like bunnies. What is it then? He answered the page rather quickly being on the same floor and entered the room to Catherine Fox sitting with none other than the object of my affections. Does she know about us? Is she gonna grill us about our on-call room adventures? He looks over at Amelia only to find the same petrified expression on her face.

What Catherine said relieved them into a great deal. They stared at her dumbfounded until she cleared her throat to draw at least some reaction out of them. Amelia was the first to recover and nervously chuckled, " Sure, Catherine. We'll look into that case. Where did you say we had to perform it? "

" The Catherine Fox Medical Center in New York. I want my best neuro and orthopedic surgeons to fly there. I'll email you the patient's scans and hus details. I hope you don't disappoint me. "

" Yes of course Catherine. We'll do our best ", Link smiled his infectious smile. Even a hard-steeled woman like Catherine seemed to swoon. Amelia felt a funny feeling which she most definitely did not like. They quickly left the conference room to pack their bags. They had an early flight the next day. The Foundation was providing them with their jet so they didn't have to worry.

They were slightly groggy on the flight as both were great fans of their sleep. They talked for a long while enjoying each other's company until the dream land gave a shout to them. It was a long flight. Again, both woke up finding huddled together in each other's arms. Amelia never thought she loved sleeping on the flights so much. In fact, she hated sleeping on flights. They were just not comfortable. How come whenever I'm with him, I have one of my best naps? He really is a good human pillow...

It was already 7 by the time they reached their hotel. They were assigned adjoining rooms. For Link it practically made no sense as he could clearly see how they were going to sleep. ;)

After an hour, it was Link who seeked her out. The baseball game that he was watching was getting pretty annoying. How come they're playing so bad? He knocked on her door and as soon as she opened the door they shared, his blue eyes turned way dark taking in her appearance. She had shed her jacket now to reveal a form-fitting camisole and very very tight jeans. How does she manage to look sexy all the time? I bet she'd look ravishing even in pajamas and a loose tshirt !

Without wasting any time, he pulled her to him and pinned her body on the door. He couldn't get enough of her. He kissed her hungrily bringing his body extremely close to hers. She moaned in his mouth arousing him further. He pulled her top above her head and let her hands remain above her using one hand. With her arms pinned above, she looked sexier to him if that was even possible. He moved to her neck and she leaned her head back giving him room. She was writhing beneath him.

She wrapped her right leg around his waist bringing his body closer for some friction. Link slid his hands up her back causing her to moan making Link grin. She always likes it when I do that, he thought smugly. She was constantly fidgeting her arms trying to free them from his firm grasp. She was itching to touch him. He released her arms when he reached down her chest. She started unbuttoning his shirt when Link undid her bra. He took one mound in his mouth eliciting a long drawn moan from her.

With her hands in his hair, she pulled him closer. She tugged on his hair and groaned as he started suckling. She just couldn't move much!! He had her completely pinned. She had had enough with his teasing and pulled his head up, giving him open mouthed kisses. She started kissing down his jaw all the way to his earlobe and started biting his earlobe gently. Link always loves it when I do that! His resolve broke. Enough with the teasing. He quickly picked her up and moved their sexy ordeal to the giant bed.

Link and Amelia laid on the bed after two long hours of hot lovemaking. Link kept looking at her with such adoration and caressed her side with his fingers gently. They were lost in each other's eyes. Link loved this part. They were the most vulnerable at this time and didn't hide their emotions. He always say great emotion behind Amelia's eyes immediately after having sex but she subtly guarded it every time. Today though he saw her looking right back at him with the same emotion as him.

Link was so gentle with her. Amelia was observing his face very closely. She always saw genuine admiration in those piercing blue eyes. And for HER!! No one looked at her that way. Even Owen didn't . She always saw some judgement in his eyes. But Link was wholly different. She was pretty sure her expression reflected his.

She really was a cuddly type of a person. Amelia was enjoying Link's soft caress on her side and his lingering gaze in her face. I'm falling for him!!! NOOOO. I have to stop myself. He is such a perfect man. I don't deserve him. He obviously wants someone much better than me. I can't ruin him too just like I do to every man I love!! She quickly guarded her emotions and moved.

Link quizzically looked at her change in demeanor. His eyes held a silent question. Oh Amelia not again!! I was finally getting through her thick wall and yet again she is shutting me out. She is so frustrating sometimes!

Amelia got up from the bed and searched for her clothes. Suddenly his grey shirt came into view. She picked it up and covered herself with it. She stopped herself from moaning at the comfort his shirt provided him. Ughh it's so comfortable. And delicate. And gentle. And soft. And it even smells like him!! I don't know how he always smells so good. Hmmm. Like lavender and ...chocolate?? I'm definitely stealing some of his clothes from his wardrobe. They were so big and cozy.

Link grinned at her content expression on wearing his shirt. She really seemed to enjoy his oversized shirt snug on her petite body. She looked so cute! He couldn't take his eyes off of her and didn't want her to leave. He knew he was entering dangerous territory. She strictly said she only wanted pain management and nothing else. Don't get your hopes up, Link!

" Do you want to order room service? I'm starving. I'm pretty sure we worked an appetite. Dinner in bed...with me ", he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and chuckled.

" Uhh nope. I'm just gonna...sleep.", she said nervously.

" Sleep? Now? It's still early in Seattle."

" But we're in New York, not in Seattle. And we agreed. No sleepovers.", she told him sternly but with a playful expression. Why doesn't he understand? I can't be near him !!

" So bend the rules. Like you said, we're not in Seattle. No harm in giving those stupid rules a rest for a few days. On top of that, we have adjoining rooms. They're practically the same! ", he said with a teasing grin

" And yet, they're not ", she said ignoring the way her heart skipped a beat when he called the rules she insisted on having 'stupid'. " We have to be at the hospital early tomorrow. Let's give our bodies a rest after the...uhhh...tiresome activities ", she flirted.

She quickly opened the connecting door and closed it on her way out to her room. She heard him call out to her, " I feel Used. Objectified. Hungry!! "

Okay. Now I really feel bad and guilty. I know it's his strategy.

She quietly opened the door to slightly look at him. He had the angry expression of a child on his face!! He was actually sulking and pouting!! Amelia could stop the grin from spreading on her lips. He looks so cute!! He's a 37 year old man!! . Older than me by a few years yet he's just a small child !! Even I behave more maturely than him sometimes. And that's saying something considering the fact that I'm a child myself, she chuckled silently at her thoughts.

" What would it take for you to let me go to sleep guilt-free? ", she raised her eyebrows with a small smile on her mouth.

" Pizza for breakfast."

Seriously? Pizza? For breakfast? Who does that?

" Okay. Deeaall ", she sings. A playful grin slot spreads on his face. " Goodnight", I smile at him.

" Goodnight. Sweet dreams. Don't let the bed bugs bite 'cause obviously I won't be there to keep them off of you ", he flirts.

" Shut upp", he hears her shout. He could hear her smile. He laughs. Eventually sleep overtakes both.

Next morning in the pizzeria, they talked a lot. This time not just only about surgery and their professional lives. They were slowly getting to know each other. Link revealed his osteosarcoma diagnosis as a child and his parents' divorce. Amelia subtly disclosed about her not so easy childhood and how she didn't have the best life as kid who had four older siblings. He even told her how much he loved the glazed doughnuts of this place called Gotham Doughnuts , a few blocks away from the pizzeria. She seemed to unknowingly retain that information in her brain.

After pizza for breakfast, Link suggested them to walk to the hospital. She looked at him dumbfounded but complied when he assured her that she'd enjoy their little walk. The walk was honestly very enjoyable. They saw many interesting things they normally wouldn't from a cab. Amelia was quite enjoying herself on this trip. He always knew how to make her laugh!

Amelia's legs were somewhat hurting as they just walked fourteen blocks to the hospital. And the fact that she was wearing high heels didn't help either. On their way to the elevator, they were laughing about something they saw on their way in when suddenly Amelia heard somebody call her from her nickname. Nobody called her that except her sisters and Derek.

" Amy!! ". She heard it again. She could recognize that voice anywhere. Her eyes widened at the slow realisation. NO. NO. NOOOO. It can't be possible. Of all people... Why God why? Is my life so entertaining to you? God really loved toying with her. She angrily looked at the sky above her hoping to coax God into altering the reality which she was about to disastrously face. " Hey kiddo. Is that you? " She turned around hesitantly.

" NANCY !! "

Author's Note:

I'm feeling a bit apprehensive towards my writing. Is it good? Shall I continue writing or stop? Please guys tell me.

Anyway, I really enjoyed writing this chapter. AmeLink are so cute XD I really love them. Sorry for the unnecessary long chapters. But I just can't help myself. When I start writing about them, I'm unable to stop and write on and on until I realise that you guys will probably get tired. Hahaha. Sorry. I would really love it you reviewed, voted and commented.

All the scenes remain close to the original plot of the show, I've just added some parts that I wanted to see . In the coming chapters I'll somewhat change the story a bit. Next part will be up soon!! Until then.

#amelia-shepherd-fanfic #amelia shepherd #atticus lincoln #amelia and link #amelink #greys antony

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sleepyfan-blog · 5 years ago

Note

Dream and Nightmare, prompt 18?

Fandom: UTMV

Characters and pairing: Nightmare, Dream, Dreammare

Word count: 2,020

Warnings: murder, minor chracter death, lying, ask to tag

Summary: Nightmare comes home after a wonderful day spent in Dream’s clothes.

Taglist: @anxiety-is-married-to-depression @angelofthehalfmoon @trainwreck-of-skeletons @hisame-amadashi @therandomskelekey

Nightmare walks back from the village, a tiny smile appearing on his face, shaking himself a little. It was amazing that somehow, the little trick that Dream had come up with seemed to have worked so well. He had tentatively told the other that sometimes the villagers could be mean to him when he was by himself, no matter how nice he tried to be to them... So Dream had proposed that the two of them switch clothes for the day, to see if they would be mean to dream, if he looked like Nightmare... And considering the fact that the two of them had opposing auras, the idea of that working had been really silly at the time...But the temptation to actually able to go into the village and pick out as many books as he wanted without Dream at his side or having to dodge nasty questions and dark looks from the village librarian had proved too much for the young guardian to resist.

Dream had promised to stay at the tree today and guard it while he went out and got books. Nightmare had also promised to help some of the villagers, should they ask him for assistance. He hadn't thought that they would ask him for his help - unless it was to go away forever and not steal away Dream's attention from them. But... The villagers had greeted him with warmth and openness - they were happy to see him for once - and the baker had given him his favorite pastries for free - insisting that he do so, as he had helped the other bring in several huge sacks of flour.

Some of the fruit sellers had been having difficulties with rats getting into their wares, so Nightmare had woven a spell over their stalls, which should prevent the rats from getting into their food, and as that had proven true, he had been given some very tasty pears and peaches to eat. He saved a couple for Dream to try... And as word had spread that he could make a spell to keep rats and other vermin away from the stalls, the rest of the food selling shopkeepers had begged him for his help. Nightmare had been happy to help them purely for the way their eyes lit up in gratitude, and the praise that they gave him... It felt amazing.

If this was what it was like when Dream was able to help people... The young negative guardian understood why his positive counterpart liked being able to help them so much. Not only did he get the satisfaction of helping people, being thanked for it by other people was wonderful... He hummed happily as he made his way over to their tree, his arms full of books, inventory full of food that neither of them really needed, but enjoyed eating nevertheless, realizing with a bit of a blush that he was skipping on the way home... He felt a little bit silly for doing so, but he couldn't help the giddy grin on his face. They absolutely had to do this again sometime!

Dream... Wasn't sitting at the base of the tree, and nor could he clearly sense his other half. The smile faded on his face as he heard soft, hiccupping sound from the far side of the tree, the books tumbling from his arms as he rushed around the big tree, the dusk light dim, but his other half's pale golden eye lights shining in the darkness. He could see bruises on the other's arms and across his face, golden ichor long dried on his tunic. "Dream! What... What happened?"

Dream burst into tears and threw himself at Nightmare, burying his face into the other's chest "I-I-It w-was a-awful! A-About an hour after you were gone, s-several of the y-young vi-villagers showed up and s-started th-throwing rocks at me. They laughed a-and mo-mocked me wh-when I as-asked them to s-stop... C-Called me a d-demon and a pa-parasite! I... I ch-chased th-them off as one of them t-tried to reach the roots of the t-tree and th-their parents c-came back and a-attacked m-me... I... I had... I had to... They w-wouldn't stop..." Dream shakily gestured to the ground beneath Nightmare's feet, confusing the negative guardian. "N-No ma-matter what I t-tried to tell them... I had... I had to..."

Nightmare realized that he was standing on a pile of... Dust. He hadn't noticed at first, as he was focused on his injured other half. Oh no... He hadn't realized that Dream would experience a day like he usually experienced, while wearing his clothes... It was so obvious to the both of them that they were just changing clothes... Were the villagers really so blind? "I... Dream... it's... It's okay... We... We were made to protect the tree, and that means protecting each other and ourselves..."

"Do... D-Do the...Are the... Are the villagers m-mean to y-you like th-that a l-lot?" Dream stuttered tears continuing to fall from his face.

This stopped Nightmare dead in his tracks. He mentally scrambled ot figure out how he should answer that question - as the truth might break the other more... Especially as he'd been lying to him about where the injuries had been coming from, as the villagers had been getting meaner and more violent the longer they stayed to pester the two of them "I..."

"Ni...Nightmare? You... You can tell me... Tell me the truth... Please? You... I... You weren't clumsy before the villagers showed up. Not that clumsy..." Dream stuttered, sniffling a little bit as he presses into the negative spirit a little further, grateful to feel the other's familiar and safe pulse of magic beneath the shirt.

"I... They've never not stopped when I drew a weapon on them... I'm... Well... That's not... Quite true. But that was an older villager, and he was really smelly and slurred his words a lot. I think he might have been... Drinkin? I... Wh-what happened to the kid of the person who attacked you?" Nightmare asked, mentally scrambling. If someone had seen Dream dressed in his clothes kill someone... Things could get way worse really, really fast.

"Th-They att-attacked me too... What... What if the villagers realized that they went missing? What are we gonna do?" Dream asked, panicking a little. The first guardian had never allowed mortals to live so close to the tree... Dream hadn't understood why util today. They could be every bit as cruel and violent and mean as the memories had stated that they were.

"We're going to take the Dust and we're gonna bury it in the forest. That way they can't prove that they went missing here, alright? If the mortals push it, we'll remind them that they live around this tree at our sufferance, and if they don't like it, they can leave." Nightmare huffed, violet eye lights shining. All he had wanted was a day to find out what it was like to be in Dream's shoes... He hadn't realized that Dream would suffer so much... That the villagers were so blind as to who the two of them really were.

"O-Okay... S-Sounds good to me.... H-How was your day, Nighty? W-Were they... You... You're not hurt..." Dream stuttered, as the two of them gathered up the Dust from the two beings who had attacked him, using the underside of their flag to carry it all.

Nightmare thought about how to answer, then again went for the truth "I... I think they thought I was you... Like they thought you were me. They were all really nice to me... On the plus side, that means that we have food so that you can heal up. I was able to look at all the books that I wanted... It was... It was a really good day... I'm sorry, I idn't think that they would hurt you... It hough they'd realize we'd switched clothes and chase me out of the village, or demand that we switch back... Not... Not this..." He hadn't wanted Dream to suffer like he had. They walk side by side, the flag between them as they walk a good distance into the forest, out of sight of The Tree. Nightmare casts a spell to dig a two foot square hole that's ten feet deep. They carefully pour the Dust into the hole and once the flag has been shaken clean of Dust, they shove the dirt back on top, patting the newly turned over soil down as much as possible. The flag is still kind of dirty, so they walk a bit further into the forest, washing the flag so that it was clean.

Dream speaks a warming spell over their flag as it also dried the flag, The two of them walk hand in hand back to the tree, as true night fell. Dream spoke up after they reached the tree "They hurt you a lot... Do all of them, or only a few? Please... Please tell me the truth."

"I... Not every single one of them have gone after me, but a lot of them have." Nightmare admitted as he fidgeted with his hands "You seem to like the villagers a lot - and as they were really nice to me, I understand! such praise is really nice. It felt so strange coming from not you... But good... I wouldn't want to take that away from you."

"No! We're going to ask the village council to drive out all those who have gone after you like that - including the council members themselves who have hurt you, if some or most of them did! We have to protect one another, as well as the tree. I... I'm sorry I failed you. I should have been there. I should have realized that the mortals were hurting you. I'm not going to help any of them, should they refuse. And we'll chase all of them away if necessary." Dream hisses, shaking his head, a determined expresion appearing on his face. "I won't let this happen anymore."

"I... Dream..." Nightmare began, unsure as to what to do now. On one hand, the idea of being rid of those who hurt him sounds wonderful. But it could be difficult and dangerous to drive them away. "But... But what if they refuse?"

"Then we make them leave. We are the guardians of the tree... But just as important as that... We have to guard and protect each other from those who would cause the other harm... I... I failed you, and for that I am deeply sorry. I'll speak to them tomorrow, in my clothes? Or we could go together, and reveal to them what should have been a harmless little trick." Dream explains, his eye lights shining strangely. "And we'll see how they respond. Hopefully the ones who hurt you will leave peacefully... But if they do cause trouble..." He swallowed, and shuddered a little "I... We'll do what we must... Right?"

"I... Okay. If... If you're sure..." Nightmare murmured, hope flaring in his chest, despite the probably awful way that this is going to end. He'd try his best to make sure that any additional Dust created or blood spilled is by his hands, rather than Dream's... He doesn't want to see more of the warmth and gentleness in the other's eyes to fade. "Tomorrow morning, we'll confront them, and show them what they've done."

Dream nodded as the two of them sat down and leaned against the tree "Tomorrow morning we'll call for a village meeting and confront them on what they've done. I love you, Moonstone."

"And I love you too, Sunshine. I'll take first watch, you rest." Nightmare murmured, reaching out to gently stroke the other's cheek.

Dream leaned into his touch and nodded, and yawned tiredly "I... Okay... Wake me if trouble comes..."

"I will..." The negative guardian promises with a small smile, watching as the other fell asleep cuddled into him. Tomorrow would be... Interesting, but for tonight, he held Dream in close, watching for anyone who might try to take the apples (or Dream) from him.

#my writing #dream sans #nightmare sans #dreammare #murder tw #lying tw #minor character death tw #ask to tag

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renaer-is-allegedly-hot · 4 years ago

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session 13

wow i’m really out of it tonight lmao uh some highlights bc these r rlly atrocious:

adam shit himself and vomited over the dwarf in our basement

fought some ppl n killed; gotta hide six bodies

pregame !

Jacob n dom r talking abt other dnd campaigns

Jacob rigged explosives somewhere

They need souls to open coffins or smth

I REALIZED MY MIC IS MUTED SO THEY CAN’T HEAR ME SING THE GOLDEN GIRLS THEME SONG THE WAY MATTHEW GRAY GUBLER DOES HAHAHAHHAHA

Thank you for being a friend

Bum bum bum bum

Travel round the world and back again

If the truth be told you’re a friend and a confidant

Etc

Jacob explaining his eye scratch

I’m just sitting here singing the golden girls theme song

Tunnel vision in smash

I’m just renegading while they talk smash

Jacob wants to home alone our house the next night we have

Immovable rod is abt 3ft long

Last time on dnd asyna heard a window break

Roll initiative

Aerana and theo roll 22

Asyna rolls 21

Adam 13

Cel 6

Asyna was waking everyone up

Halfling size ballista ? In our turret ? Maybe

Ooh trebuchet is an interesting sans font

Aerana is going first

Double dash downstairs

You hear stuff on the first floor making noise; you and theo get to the second floor about to go downstairs

Theo in master bedroom double dashes towards where I am

Asyna

In watchtower, asyna's gonna try and do stuff from above ? Maybe .

Proposes turning into a hummingbird

Spike growth ? Grows spikes

Also creates rough terrain

In front of the door

Oop they're speaking goblin

Goblins

2d4 damage for each 5 ft they move

Some of them were able to get inside the house but still slowed down

Adam

Will cast cantrip

Thaumaturgy to boom voice 3x louder than normal "WHO DARES ENTER MY HOUSE PLEASE LEAVE WITHIN THE NEXT TEN SECONDS AND YOU WILL BE SPARED ,,, PLEASE"

Intimidation check

Lmao a 7

Entire house booms; everyone heard it but like effect?

Adam sleeps naked

Cel

Right in front of door to hall on second floor

Aerana

2 squares away from action at back of house

Theo

Also goes for pantry, same place generally as aerana

Asyna

Starts downstairs

Gonna turn into ape and try and make way down side of building as ape

Down p much by next turn

Goblins

Apparently being eaten up by spikes

Should I make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich I'm kinda craving

O shoot I gotta run soon for medicine

Adam

Dashing

This is just slow running in a dream

Cel

Base of stairs ?

Also heading towards pantry

Aerana

Bust in

Momentarily frozen

To the right next to basement hatch r two hulking figures covered in thick dark fur; kinda pointy ears, look kind of like goblins and v tall like easily 7ft

Big mauls

Bugbears

Can I fight?

23 to hit, 7 damage to closest one

The goblins trying to move the thing but not working well

Theo

I'M GONNA RUN TO GRAB MY MEDS

Slashes at the one aerana didn't hit lmao I rlly just did that I'm breathing

15 barely misses

Goblin blocks lillian's strike

Asyna

Srsly should I make a sandwich

On first floor outside

Bro my headache went to the other side of my head wtf

Gonna go through a window

Follows them in and attacks a bunch of them

Bro I kinda rlly want a sandwich

17 and 18 to hit, 6 and 4 damage ?? 10 damage ?? 10 damage for both ??

KILLS BOTH OF THEM N I C E

Bashes their heads together

I'm making a sandwich

"it's a very forceful kiss"

Third one readies self

Lashes out at asyna, misses

Goblins

R also gonna try and attack aerana and theo

12 damage to theo

I'm eating my sandwich

One of the middle ones is gonna go for asyna, hits, 5 damage

That was a good sandwich might get another one

Adam

Bro I kinda want another sandwich

Gets downstairs w max speed and peeks in, sees aerana and theo and two dead guys by window and two more living fighting an ape

Looks at theo

Bro again I kinda want another sandwich

Makes the one that hit theo make a wisdom saving throw

Did not make it, hideous laughter

Mans can't stop laughing, has to make wisdom saving throw each turn ig

Adam has to tell a joke

Comes down and looks at bugbear, locks eyes

Our party walks into a bar . But most of us walk under it

What

Is this a short joke ?

I don't get it yikes

Panicked dom laughing

Tells us to not hit the guy laughing; save him for last

Bonus action uses cutting words on the one aerana is fighting; "fuck you"

Cel

I still kinda want another sandwich

To clarify my sandwich was like half

I think yesterday or smth I like hit my foot lol and I did the thing where I compose myself rlly quickly to ignore the pain and up my pain tolerance and it left a mark but like it literally doesn't hurt so not saying I'm upping my pain tolerance but one day if I ever got like idk shot or smth I'm not gonna have a reaction

Cel hits the one that's doing better w a spell and then does shortbow 25 to hit, 12 damage

"how do you want to do this?"

Takes an arrow right through his brainstem and the arrowhead goes out his mouth

Aerana

Wasted insightful fighting, didn't hit

Scream of frustration that I missed

Theo

Takes bow and tries to hit, 13 misses

Asyna

Do I rlly still want another sandwich

Hits on one roll, 7 damage

Guy is barely alive

Goblins

One that tries to attack aerana misses, guy on ground is now up, guy attacking asyna hits, 11 damage

Adam

Cutting words on guy that just got up "oh you're finally awake"

"ever heard of the one where the guy got back up"

Goblin rolls nat20

Cel

22 to hit, 9 damage

Stabs him, hurts

Aerana

"next time remember it"

If an ally is within 5 ft of you you get sneak attack

If u have advantage

Don't need advantage if another enemy of the target is within 5 ft of it

Start over

When rogues have advantage, get to add sneak attack

Can add sneak attack when u don't have advantage if

One of allies is within 5 ft of you

And if u don't have disadvantage

Theo

Gonna try for the bow again

Going for the one asyna's fighting

8 damage

Guy is on last legs

Asyna

Kills

Fun fact apes have been known to rip off the faces of their enemies

Rips face off then gently puts him down

Still two goblins left

Goblins

Try and run

Attacks of opportunity from celandine, theo and aerana

Nat20 from cel

Theo and aerana miss

I've missed like every hit what is this

14 damage from cel

They're still able to get away

Asyna makes attack of opportunity

I still kinda want another saaaandwich

Neither hit

Adam

33 across board for both for sleep; both fall over and hit ground, asleep

Adam goes outside and looks if anyone is watching outside their window

Looks like one of our neighbors is at their window out of the apothecary

Uses infernal legacy to cast darkness, blocking their darkvision

Puts it between fallah's house and bodies

Then drag the bodies

Adam is kinda sweaty n exerted

Aerana is watching ot, asyna takes one body cel adam and theo take the other

Theo is rolling damage

Cel binds their feet first and adam prepares sleep

Theo rolls 13 damage and one dies, other 15 and also dies

Why is my eye glitching lmao

Maybe I still want a sandwich

What time do I need to be up tomorrow wait

Idk lmao

We've brought our bodies in, the night is ours

It's 10ish at night

Adam's gonna sleep in jeans

Adam was not naked in combat ?

Or maybe he was

Adam doesn't wear pajamas so he had pants

Sleeping downstairs shifts for the night

Adam takes first shift

Adam is sweating a lot, feeling a little odd; feels super weak and cold and feels a little sick like he might throw up

Constitution saving throw

"can I feel this coming and give myself bardic inspiration?"

"uh . Sure"

"hold it in hold it in hold it in"

Check to see if he can make it to the bathroom

"boi that's just nasty" adam wakes up someone ? Adam

Adam wakes theo up

"you must be real glad I'm wearing pants right now"

Rolls nat1

Adam vomits onto theo ? Vomits into theo's cloak

Adam becomes violently ill

The key eventually comes out the butt

A 4

Able to makes way down hatch towards bucket by ot

Vomits on ot

"ot is, like, weeping"

Adam is weakened

So adam shit and hurled

Adam stomps it down the drain ?

Next morning

Adam comes down with the key

Adam's exhaustion is cured after long rest

We're not talking to adam today

Adam sets key on table "did you wash that first" theo / adam slowly takes key back

Adam casts sleep on ot to kind of relieve him

Cel goes to jones, one of the goblins informs cel that jones is out ,,, just out

Cel can't find jones

Home alone-ing the house now ?

Aerana

House was in state of disrepair before

Spike spell tore up front of house, lots of windows knocked out from fireball explosion and were damaged during fight

Bad to a little bit worse

Theo 20 for investigation

Random ropes and bricks, nails, wooden planks

Intelligence check w advantage

19, sets up a few different traps; two swinging brick traps when a door is opened + simple nails stuck into plank so would hurt if someone stepped on it

Asyna 9 for investigation

Cel sees jones putting a bunch of keys into the lock

Jones can't find the key to open his door

Jones is maybe gonna get some stooges to remove the bodies

10 dragons

Henrietta is gonna dump em

Astigmatism lmao

Back at the manor

Adam is done cleaning

Ot asked if he could be set free, adam says "this is my fault, I got it buddy"

Adam is going to the apothecary down the street

Walks up to counter, fallah is there

"heyo what's poppin fallah"

Takes out potion of necrotic resistance

Adam says he bought it at sea ward, roll for deception; 12

Why am I sO LETHARGIC ALL THE TIME !!!

Offers adam 50 gold

Pushes for 60, 10 for persuasion check

Just takes it for 50

Fallah gives medicine, smells like oregano

Adam goes in for a hug, hesitates then retracts

Goes to bardic school to talk to master

Yava is there

12 insight check

Yava is usually v composed but today

Yava is an elf so is like bruh wdym u trust me after knowing me for like a month

Asks abt house security

Adam just straight up tells her he's in trouble w the xanathar guild and is asking for glyph of warning spells ?

Persuasion check, gives self bardic inspiration

11, yava agrees to help

She's willing to do it for free

Can cover 8 entrances to the house

"I'd b willing to do this but adam u must b more careful"

Adam tells her he's dealing w a large sum of money - half a million dragons

There was half a million dragons embezzled ?

Yava thought it was just a rumor

Adam is idiot

Adam asks yava if she wants in

Idiot

#i talk a lot about sandwiches in this one #sn #13

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lucysweatslove · 5 years ago

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Day 45 // Flat on My Back in a Lonely Sprawl

I stare at the ceiling because I can not fall Asleep tonight No not at all

“Taste the Pain” - RHCP

Let’s talk about today for a small bit.

Woke up at 4:30, did some cardio (yawn) and some lifting. Even though it wasn’t perfect my any means I felt like it was decent.

Felt a little shaky this morning but attributed that to a hard workout 2-3 hours before I could eat breakfast (breakfast before gym = sick Lucy). No pain though.

Around 10 I started feeling actually ill.

Back pain started again. With it came nausea, dizziness, and a cold sweat. At one point my HR literally measured at 45 bpm and then it spiked up to 80 so it’s fair to say my body isn’t handling this back pain very well. Pain is about 6-7 at this point (keep in mind I have a legitimate “10″ experience)

To manage nausea I was like “oh, look, fun dip!” and ate two fun size packs (90 calories or pure sugar but it tastes so delicious). Also had two chocolate covered strawberries because they sounded so good.

Literally could not drink water. Any fluids sounded and tastes repulsive.

Still managed a full work day despite progressively worsening symptoms.

Went to Urgent Care after work and had to wait, no lie, over an hour to see people in no acute distress taken before me.

Probably a muscle spasm, OK to take cyclobenzaprine which I do have but don’t use because I hate taking medicine if my body will fix it on its own.

At home, Husband brought me treats (2.5 oz of delicious black licorice and these fig treats). That was dinner. Again, I feel awful.

Took said antispasmodic

Literally just want to sleep forever.

I came in to Urgent Care just wanting to be sure that a) this wasn’t an issue with my kidney or gallbladder and b) cyclobenzaprine is in fact the right medication. I want 0 narcotics/opioids and anybody who reads my chart would know I’m opposed to them on an outpatient level. I don’t like “medication” to fix a symptom if there is another intervention, holistic or otherwise. I don’t want to take cyclobenzaprine if we can find the reason behind the muscle spasm. Not that Urgent Care can do that, but it just seems weird.

Good news is that this does NOT seem likely caused by any of my lifts. Bad news is that if this isn’t clear by Thursday, like no pain at all, I probably shouldn’t do my lifts (it’s upper back/arms/chest day).

I’ve had a lot of weird health problems lately- a two-month long cold, three weeks of health, an ear infection, now back spasms. Prior to that, and something that’s been chronic: left palmar pain. My left hand is non-weight baring (unless I make a fist). I even did a couple months of OT for it and not only do I not have a real diagnosis but I don’t have actual resolution (working theory AFAIK is muscle are too loose causing bones to splay).

I got no sleep Saturday night. Legit, I was up until 4:30 on Sunday morning... and was up AT 4:30 this morning (so I had ONE day to COMPLETELY turn around my sleep cycle). And I wonder why my body struggles to maintain normal sleep patterns.

Other things of note:

Less than two days now until my rocks are done tumbling with coarse grit

UPS decided a ColourPop order couldn’t be left at my door and now they are taking it to CVS of all places (note: I do not go to CVS).

I bought a new/larger tumbler (double barrel; 3lb capacity each, so I can either process rocks of different hardness at once OR alternatively so I can have more than one grit going at the same time).

This tumbler was supposed to arrive today because it ships from a store about 250 miles away, but it’s on backorder so I don’t get it yet....

And I think that’s it :) Initially my plan for tomorrow involved going to the gym just for cardio (increasing amount of cardio a week), but given my back... nope. Gonna sleep, shower, actually make a breakfast- then get to work, hopefully in tact :)

#journal

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imreallyfkinsorry-blog · 5 years ago

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Honestly right now i feel like shit. This was the last thing i ever wanted to happen. Did you really have to block/unfriend me on everything. Do u really not want to be my friend that badly, i was really upset u didnt even message me once over these 4 days like u wudnt even know, but i accepted it because of u and ur situation, i was ok with not talking to u for months if it atleast meant i can still be your friend, i was so happy for you when i saw ur results like u wudnt believe, i almost called you the second i saw, im still sooo proud of you, i was so excited when i heard u reached this morning i wanted to be the first one to hug u and congratulate you but u cudnt even look me in the eye, that really hurt, i mean like really cant i celebrate your achievements with you? Cant i be happy for you? Even after all that i still bought a freakin slice of cheese cake for u just now in massy to surprise you tomorow, but now i saw that im unfriended. Is what im doin really that bad? All the headpats and snacks and stupid jokes, the cup the pens, the kfc, the chinese food, the bestie card the worrying about you, even not messaging you after 4 or on weekends, even when alicia asked about the art supply crap i told her i probably forgot to give u, I really didnt know i was causing u so much pain, those stupid little things made me so happy, like soooo happy at this shit job, i even got super friendly with like everyone in the office so it wudnt be weird when im around you. Like everyone really likes me now like you wudnt believe, everyone just comes up and touches me or makes some joke or pushes me and honestly thats all thanks too you, the fay-cade is serious af, ugh it may sound like im just rambling on but thats because i am just rambling on, this may very well be the last message i send you so im sorry if its long i just have alot to say. I even made a new account since u know im probably blocked. Look tbh i understand y u blocked me and dont want to talk to me outside of work u think this is gonna make ur relationship healthier and perfect and at the end of the day as much as i throw tantrums and bitch about u not messaging me and neglecting me, i still do 100% platonically love you, you are still MY best friend you can block me, unfriend me even pass me straight in the office, nothing is gonna change that,i may not attend your wedding but i want you too know i want you to be happy,i genuinely do, you fucking deserve that, you deserve the best tho i not gonna lie and say ur not an asshole or very immature or that u treat me like shit, but jesus tap dancing christ its those little things that you do that make me soo happy, i just want you to be sooo happy and i want to thank you for being my friend, like really, thank you Lorrie. I can never hate you....

Nvm u made me cry today,i was setting up this cool joke from a tiktok vid i saw and u just ripped me apart, i had to go outside to play it off, now stacy ann thinks i hav corona or some. I was dissapointed in u in that moment but i will never hate you so u can hate me all you want, act agitated with me all you want, act like im bothering you all you want, im still gonna pat ur head, smile with you, bring you snacks and defend you whenever i hear the slightest inkling of someone insulting u. You know what u were being a dick for today im gonna eat your cake now. Btw my friend came to pick me up today thats why i stayed back late then i saw u, were u running from me? Thats kinda freaking depressing and kinda really hurt but still

I DO NOT HATE YOU,

Still i am sooooo fucking proud of you tho, fucking distinctions hoe fucking hell you bad bitch.

Im probably gonna leave JD soon so please please please please dont hate me until then, i cant deal with passing you straight and not talkin to u, we can talk about suppliers and staplers for hours if u want, im just sooo fkin sorry i made u feel like that so please dont hate me, honestly there really is something wrong with me, im trying to work on it.

I started writing this to fkin get everything off my chest and tell you y i hate u but i cant, i really cant.if today or tomorrow something happens to either of us i dont want today to be the way we remember each other.

You're my friend, you always will be, even if everyone is against you, even if its 40 years in the future, even if you never talk to me again, you can always come to me, i will always be there for you, no matter what.

Btw if u think ghosting me is gonna get u away from me buyin you a birthday present then you dont know me atall.

Can you atleast just add me back on facebook, this actually really bothers me, i really like to see the shit u post once in a while, i promise never to message you and i promise not to post anything so u wont have to see me...please.

If not then ok, im still gonna be down but i dont hate you and i am soo sorry i forced you to have to go this far i really really didnt wanna hurt you. Being your friend has made me so goddamn happy these couple months,like every single day was something to look forward too but if i have to sacrifice my happiness in order for you to be happy,as much as ot fucking hurts, then so be it, I can live with that.

Thank you for being my friend, like truly thank you,that meant so much to me even if it was for a short while. Thank you.

Again im sorry and please dont hate me

Lol now finish the cake.

Im so proud of you, u smart muthafker and im lovin the person your becoming, strong, intelligent and beautiful. You deserve to be happy, you earned that right and i hope you get everything you want. Im praying for it, like to indian jesus and the spagetti monster.

Good bye, i may not come tomorrow.

Pawny stays with me until i leave, no kidnapping or chicken protective services😤

Thank you for everything, thank you for being such an amazing friend and for being there for me I really and truly appreciate it...... and please dont not forget me.

Add me back😢

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little-manatee · 5 years ago

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IronStrange Hanahaki fic (That I can't find anymore.)

The talk about Hanahaki trope in the discord today reminded me of this fic I read some time ago. (Can’t find the link anymore, but it’s in Thai.)

This post somehow becomes really long, (because I've got some passage I translated saved.), gonna put it in more section. ↓↓↓

===

It started with Tony getting Hanahaki after Steve left, and got more and more sick, but refused to tell anyone. He collected the flowers and put them in vases or something.

Happy, Pepper and Rhodey were worried so they asked Stephen (who were friends with them before all the magic and hero debacles and recently got back in touch) to help Tony get some sleep with herbs and spells. Tony made Italian dishes for Stephen. They got close, they bantered and texted and spent time together.

One day Stephen accidentally saw Tony vomited sere rose (meaning ‘our love is ending’) after receiving goodbye message from Steve, so he raided Kamar-Taj library until he realised it’s Hanahaki. The next day, he gave a Sunflower to Tony and they kinda got back to their normal banter. Stephen kept giving Tony Sunflowers and a while later he asked why Tony refused the surgery. Tony told him he was scared because if surgically remove Hanahaki root, the feeling will never return. He was scared he will never be able to feel beloved ever again.

===

“Why?”, normally with someone this stubborn, Stephen would have given up long ago, but it’s Tony and he can’t.

Dark brown eyes peer up at him, reflecting light in white ripples, almost like unshed tears, “… I’m scared.”

There are 3 ways to treat Hanahaki.

Stephen took the, too thin, wrist and tugged Tony to his side,

One, the feeling was returned.

“There is nothing to be afraid of,”

Two, loosed the unrequited feeling.

“Pepper will find the best doctor in the world for you,”

Three, surgically remove the roots of feeling.

“Everything will be alright, you will be cured,”

The first is a moot point, second’s success rate is too low, but third…

“Please.”

Third, if do so, the patients will never be able to feel the same way ever again.

“Stephen, you don’t understand.”

Which is why most usually prefer to be buried by the garden in their lungs.

“I’m in pain, always in pain, much more than those first few weeks.” Tony hand tighten around his, “but when I think I will never again feel happy when someone gives me flowers, never feel excited when someone kisses me, never feel joy when someone holds me in their arms…, is never be able to be in love again not even more unbearable, doctor?”

In silent darkness, a drop of tear fell. “I… have dreamt of being love my entire life…”

===

I don’t remember how the rest of the conversation goes, but Stephen revealed that he also got Hanahaki and all the Sunflowers are from Stephen himself. He bargained for Tony to get the surgery, or he won’t treat himself either, Tony, of course, agreed. So Tony got the surgery, but Stephen doesn’t.

Instead, after Tony had been released, Stephen brought him to a sunflower field and they spent their afternoon lazing around together. When Tony asked why did the doctor bring him there, Stephen smiles and told him it’s an experiment. Later, Stephen, who still procrastinating on getting the surgery, took Tony on dates and kept giving him sunflowers. And every time Tony asked why, he always said it’s an experiment. One day, he visited Tony at the same time as always, and when Tony asked him where are they going today, Stephen answered that there are no more places to go for his experiments.

===

No? That’s such a disappointing answer. Tony thought a bit disheartened, but shrugged, “so what are the results of these experiments?”

“Only you can answer that, actually” The sorcerer walked pass Tony and lower himself on the sofa. FRIDAY turned the television off and suddenly, silence fell. “It has been two months after you had the surgery, is there any complications?”

“…Nope. No morning sickness petals and… I think I gain a bit more weight now.” Tony leaned back, crossing his arms, “ Oh! I’m getting a garden, a real one! They will deliver them here tomorrow. You should come!”

Stephen wondered how many acre Tony Stark’s garden is going to be, but that’s not important right now. “And…what about your fear?” “What?” “What you said before getting the surgery.” Tony's mouth went dry, remembering his own words.

((“but when I think I will never again feel happy when someone gives me flowers, never feel excited when someone kisses me, never feel joy when someone holds me in their arms…, is never be able to be in love again not even more unbearable, doctor?”))

“So those experiments…?” “Can you still feel them?” “I…” The normally talkative mechanic couldn’t quite find the word. He blinked, repeatedly, then looked up at Stephen. And abruptly tried to hide his face in his palms, feeling his cheeks blushed in flame. Stephen tilted his head and bend down, “Don’t just smile, give me an answer, come on.” “…Not smiling.” The doctor laughed, “Your denial is not convincing with that kind of expression!” “Fine! Fine! I do! Satisfied?”

However, instead of receding, Stephen moved even closer, “There is still one experiment left.”

===

And yeah, they kiss. (I’m sorry, my translations are trash.) At the end, Tony realized that sunflower meaning in flower language is 'I'm falling in love with you', and Stephen’s Hanahaki was healed. Not by surgery, but by getting Tony’s love in return.

Now come scream with me, because I cannot find this fic anymore. (oT-T)尸

#marvel #ironstrange #tony stark x stephen strange #fanfic #that fic i can't find #where?

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canaryatlaw · 5 years ago

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alright. today was kinda hectic and stressful so not really the best. woke up at 6, made it to work and all that. It’s my clinic day, and we have an “immersion” project this week where students from a law school that’s on spring break will come and volunteer for the whole week. and obviously like, there isn’t time for them to observe so they just get thrown into it, and so today was had 8 volunteers which is a lot, especially when none of them have any actual experience with this so you gotta guide them through all of it. initially there was a lot of stress assigning people to cases and making sure we had enough volunteers to cover, at one point we definitely had one too many but I ended up having to reject one anyway so it worked out alright. from there it was just a lot of people running back and forth all day and having to give specific instructions, and of course my computer’s usb ports decided to crap out on me and no longer work which is like, a very crucial function for us because the volunteers fill out the paperwork on their laptops and then transfer it to us on usb drives, so that was a whole deal too. and then there was just like, the worst luck with getting judges, by some miracle all of the orders got granted, but they definitely did some weird stuff marking up the paperwork and just like making decisions that are not actually based in the law. and then I had a phone call with an opposing counsel about an argument for a motion that’s coming up and admittedly I was probably somewhat too candid in my reaction (it’s just that he has a really stupid ass argument that contradicts how the law has been interpreted in every other case in this courthouse, but sure try to argue that) and then he just like totally flipped out and started yelling at me about how rude and disrespectful I was being and was just like “well if you want to be rude then I guess that’s how we’ll play this” and hung up and I was just like.....what the fuck just happened?? and of course because I have no control over my emotions my body promptly decided that I needed to start crying which god I hate so much that I’m twenty fucking seven and can’t control my body’s need to start crying in situations where I very much would not like to be crying anymore than I could when I was fucking four years old and feeling the way. I just, UGH. it wasn’t too bad though, my supervisor (who I share an office with) came in and I told her and she was comforting and that helped me feel a bit better, and then the volunteers came back down and I had to pretend like I wasn’t just crying and I may have been like “oh it’s allergies” once or twice because I just didn’t want to get into it. what I really hate though is like, this was objectively not really a big deal, but I can’t get my mind off of it for the rest of the day and it’s driving me up the wall, and I’m just so peeved at myself for doing that and peeved about how it played out and just concerned about what’s going to happen from here. And I know it’s all probably gonna be fine and not be a huge deal, but like, my desire to have everybody like me is going into overdrive and just flipping out at the possibility that someone’s thinking badly of me, and that’s really what this all comes down to and god I just hate it all so much!! ugh. sigh. anyway. A few more work things before we move on, one of the awful judges (albeit the less awful of the two) is apparently going to be on the bench in one of the courtrooms for the rest of the week because that judge is out, which I was initially like WELL FUCK about because I’m supposed to have a hearing in front of that judge tomorrow, and he’s such a hardass and can be a giant pain on the bench and I just don’t know how that would go. but when I told my supervisor she said he probably won’t actually have the hearing and just reschedule it, because that’s what he usually does apparently. and like, I would be glad to not have to do it in front of him, but at the same time I’m annoyed at the prospect of the case getting stretched out any further because we’ve already had several hearing dates set where it hadn’t gone and like, I was determined to get it done tomorrow but these are just circumstances beyond my control, so there’s not much I can do there. I guess we’ll see what happens. My coworker sent out an email asking if someone could switch clinic days with her for theirs next week because on Thursday which is her clinic day she has this continuous terrible case that has been an ongoing hearing for literally months now. and like, obviously Thursday all the volunteers are still going to be here so it’s still going to be chaotic, but like, looking at the options, it was either going to have to be me or my work buddy to take it, and he has clinic tomorrow so if he did take it he’d have it two days in a row which is a lot (which I know because I’ve done it a lot) and he can sometimes get frazzled when there’s too much stuff going on and I just don’t think that would be a good idea for him. so as draining as today was, I volunteered to take the Thursday clinic day as well because it was really the right thing to do. Hopefully at least the volunteers will have somewhat of a better idea of what they’re doing by then so it’ll be a bit less stressful. I hope, at least. sigh. anyway. I was able to leave work at like 5:20, so not bad for a clinic day. headed home, got some food and my laptop and turned on the tv. Caught tonight’s episode of The Resident, then watched last week’s Black Lightning, then finished up the child abuse doc I was watching on netflix, and finally ended it with an episode of Gotham before showering and starting to get ready for bed, and now I’m here. well, this was a long one, clearly I had a lot ot get off my chest. hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, I’m still kind of unsure about what’s going to happen with the hearing so we’re going to prepare as if we definitely are going to hearing, so I guess we’ll see how that works out, it shouldn’t be too bad since we’ve actually prepped for other hearing dates in the past so it’s nothing too new. I’m just concerned that if the hearing does go the judge might make a very callous decision and end up further traumatizing my client, who’s already been going through a lot, so I really hope that doesn’t happen, either with it not going forward or just the judge being good. alright, that’s all I got. It’s like 12:15 am, I can sleep till 6:30 am tomorrow because I don’t have any morning court, but I should still definitely be getting to sleep, so that’s what I will be doing now. Goodnight babes. Love you lots.

#daily journal #March 2020

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loadingluke · 6 years ago

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Recovery days 6&7 of stage one RFF phalloplasty

THURSDAY 4/2

Today was pretty uneventful. I’m feeling pretty mobile and I’m able to move quite a bit, but I’m starting to miss being in a real bed, without being bothered (as much as the nurses are lovely!). I think it’s a good sign though, cause clearly I’m feeling well. I spent the morning binging Brooklyn 99. I had my usual sponge bath and freshen up, and then Andrew came back in to have a look at everything. He said that Goossen will be popping in later tonight once he is out of theatre. I had a visit from a friend and mum. It was nice to hang out and have a chat, especially now that I’m able to sit up and wander around.

The padding around my phallus is completely falling apart. The right side was just unraveling heaps, so any time I had to walk anywhere I had to awkwardly walk whilst holding it up. I’m so, so, so excited to have them off. The plastic bandages covering my butt incisions are completely rolled up, all the incisions are exposed. It’s nice to have a look at them, they’re really thin. The plastic ended up rolling into little lumps, which made sitting pretty uncomfortable. A nurse came by and replaced that, and that made me feel a lot more comfortable.

I watched more Netflix, just waiting around to see Goose. He popped by at about 8:30pm. Clearly it had been a long day, so I just decided to wait till tomorrow to change my padding. We just had a quick chat about tomorrow’s plan of action, and then I headed off to bed.

FRDAY 8/2

Discharge day! The morning started off pretty slow. I just watched some YouTube videos, and talked to the nurses. A little before 11, a physio came in with a hot water bath to prepare for my splint to be made. At 11, an OT came by to start the splint process. Hans and Andrew came in pretty quickly after that. Hans began unwrapping my arm, removing all the bandages and foam holding my graft in place. This was the first time I got to see my arm after surgery. There were some antibacterial dressings on my arm, but they were looking really good so he decided to leave them on instead of replacing them. He said my arm looked like it was healing really well. He drew my attention to some small superficial blisters near the top of my graft. He said they were completely normal, and already starting to heal up quite well.

I’m not going to lie, it was pretty emotional seeing my arm. I’m so grateful and happy with how it’s all gone and have absolutely no regrets at all, and I’ve been emotionally preparing for this for a long long time. But it was still a lot to take in. I’m happy with how it looks and I know it’ll turn out fine, but it was still emotional I guess. It wasn’t as long or large as I expected though which is nice, and I was really shocked with how good it was already looking. I’ll post some pictures of it as it’s healing when I’m ready.

Once I was redressed, the OT began with the splint. It’s made from a grey plastic that melts at about 60-65 degrees, so they melt it and then wrap your arm in it and it moulds to you! When it cools it goes rock hard again. It was really cool to watch. While she was doing this, Hans started to remove my dressings on my groin, and I finally got to see my penis without any dressings for the first time! It looked really good, I am so so beyond happy. One the splint was fitted and my dressings removed, Hans booked me in to see him on Tuesday, and the OT on Wednesday.

Once they left, the nurses came by to replace the dressings on the incisions around my groin: the two on my legs and one on my abdomen. Without sounding dramatic, but this was honestly the most painful experience this week! Look. I’m a very hairy man, and Hans shaved me during surgery but it had already grown back quite a bit 😬 The nurses had adhesive removal wipes, but it was a very long and drawn out process. Yeowch. It was good to see the incisions, they were so SO thin. So so thin, I’m really impressed. I reckon once they are all healed up (and my hair has recovered from the nurse waxing 😂) you’ll barely see them. Honestly so stoked with how everything is looking!

After the nurses left, I had my last hospital sponge bath, and started to slowly pack everything up. I got some clothes on, and had the nurses come in to help me out on the dick donut. Its pretty noticeable in my pants....very awkward 😂. I’ll just carry around an empty tote bag conveniently covering my front or wear some long shirts. It’s a little embarrassing but it’ll get better once I can start to leave the house without it. Hans said that my urethra is healing up really well, so hopefully it won’t be too long and/or the next few weeks pass quickly 😁

After I was all organised and dressed, I had a visit from a friend, and then mum came and we got ready for my discharge. I wrote a card and gave some chocolates to the nurses on my ward to thank them. They were all lovely and I had a really positive experience. It took a while for the meds to be sent to my room, and for my paperwork to get there, but at about 4pm I was finally discharged! I hobbled out of the hospital and mum left to get the car so I wouldn’t have to walk too far. We headed back to our family friends place. Once I got in I had a nap as I was pretty tired. Since then, I’ve just been relaxing and watching TV. I’m feeling pretty tired, so I’ll probably head to bed soon.

So here we are. First week of recovery done. I reckon now I’m gonna stop with the long posts every day as there’s not really anything to say! I’ll just update you all when something interesting happens. Thanks for all the support over the last week, it’s been really appreciated 🥰💪

#lukes phalloplasty #phalloplasty #phallo #rff phallo #rff phalloplasty #rff #ftm #trans #transgender #trans man #trans guy #dr goossen #bottom surgery #lower surgery

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