#Niall's love for babies is showing a lot this year 😭

[1d1195]

hi sam,

I need big sister advice...how do yoy stop yourself from liking something...and not just a person, just anything...celebrities, a fandom, a show, how do you stop the obsession before you go down the rabit hole

First and foremost 😭 big sister advice I'm 😭😭😭😭😭😭

AS ALWAYS--SORRY FOR THE LENGTH OF MY RESPONSE.

Okay, second, I am happy to give you my advice but I'm not sure I'm the best person to ask given my personal history with Twilight/1D/Harry.

HOWEVER. A little tangent: I am obsessed with iced coffee as well. Not sure I have mentioned that on here (you can probs tell from my stories, but anyway). I am constantly in a battle between "I should just make coffee at home" and "it's only $4" literally every day. I constantly here about how my $4 a day routine is attributing to my lack of a house in today's market. Not to toot my own horn but I do a lot for my family, my students, my friends, my boyfriend--pretty much anyone that enters my life, you get a piece of me that's yours to have. I don't do a whole lot for myself--self-care or otherwise. So I think life is short and I try to remind myself that $4 a day is not the worst thing in the world. (probably a bad mindset but if I don't do something for my mental well-being I think I'm going to explode).

The reason I say this is because I DO think life is short and you should allow yourself some indulgences. Otherwise, what's this all for? I'm not saying you should spend thousands on an obsession (see also: my Harry collection 🙃) but if you enjoy something, there's no reason you shouldn't as long as it's not causing you physical, mental, or financial harm (in my opinion).

For me? I have to limit myself. I used to watch EVERY interview, read EVERY article, watched EVERY Instagram story the entire 1D fandom had to offer and it became so overwhelming, so EXHAUSTING I had to stop. Like in my crazy teenage mind I thought that if I didn't watch EVERY piece of 1D things people would call me out for not being a real fan or that Harry/Niall would one day find out I didn't see their interview on Oct 12, 2013 and they would kick me out of the club.

It's part of why I had such a big hiatus on here. I am a huge planner so setting time for myself to do what I want to look at, watch, think about (albeit, it's very little time these days) is really important to me. Also, I have to decide if it's healthy or not for me to do so. I was staying up all hours a night to write stories and post and interact here on tumblr. It wasn't good for me.

I think just reframing the context is important too. I would like to believe I'm not really obsessed anymore. I have a great appreciation for shows and celebrities. I like to believe I know a LOT about Harry (but obviously I don't--para-social stuff ya know?). I know a great deal about How I Met Your Mother and The Princess Bride. I love potatoes, babies, math, reading, etc. I don't think these are obsessions they're just things I love.

Obsession often has a negative connotation and while I do like to tell people I have an obsession with Harry Styles for exaggeration/honestly what else am I supposed to call it? I don't think it's the right thing. Tbh, corny as it sounds I have the utmost respect for Harry. I think he's wonderful of course, and I wouldn't have known that without being so crazy for 1D for so many years.

So, I doubt any of this was helpful so I'll try to summarize:

I would really think if it's obsession or just something you really enjoy. I think there's a pretty significant difference. I also think it's okay to indulge in the things you love. Life is too short to not enjoy anything--especially something you're feeling passionate about. Moderation is important for this though. Your well-being is more important than knowing every detail about the thing you love. Not everything has to be an obsession.

If this wasn't helpful, let me know I'll try again 💕 Thank you for asking me for advice! This is like the sweetest, nicest thing 😭

xoxo

[sadaveniren]

I posted 2,905 times in 2022

405 posts created (14%)

2,500 posts reblogged (86%)

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I tagged 2,872 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#😭😭😭 - 69 posts

#yes - 65 posts

#bless - 59 posts

#😂😂😂 - 51 posts

#answered - 47 posts

#love it - 32 posts

#🥺🥺🥺 - 30 posts

#mood - 28 posts

#lol - 27 posts

#this is a queue - 27 posts

Longest Tag: 125 characters

#he wouldn’t change a thing because he knows if he did he wouldn’t be where he is today and he’s happy with where he is 🥺🥺🥺

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Harry: writing Complicated Freak, Medicine, Stockholm Syndrome

Louis:

741 notes - Posted April 20, 2022

#4

I feel like it’s time for me to share my theory about 1D’s formation (and why it had been planned well before this X-factor video was shot - though this video did very well at making it seem organic)

A lot of this theory comes from reading stuff from @verily-i-say who, if you weren’t around when she was, worked with reality television and talked about how casting for reality shows works (ie everyone is assigned a role before they are even cast and you just try to find someone who can fit the roles that you need)

Liam giving that talk a couple months back about how 1D was something he believed Simon made for him because of their talk only solidified this theory for me. So lets get into it.

Let’s start with what was going on in pop culture in the start of 2010, and what 1D was originally supposed to be. Because remember, 1D was never supposed to be as big as they ended up being! By 2010 boy bands still weren’t as big as they had been in the late 90s and early 00s. There were the Jonas Brothers who were starting to wind down their activities just by the nature of how long they had been. The producers of X-factor would have known this without any sort of inside knowledge it’s just how pop bands are. They have shelf lives. K-pop was trying hard to pierce the western market but so far nothing had stuck and there was a feeling at the time that kpop would never make it big in the west because of how their bands were crafted/promoted.

What that means is there was room for a boy band. I think Simon and the people in the X-factor knew it was a good time to make a boyband. There was a market for it, and something that needed filled. So they start crafting their story. No group had ever won the X-factor because pre-made groups kinda sucked/weren’t fully crafted the same way they used to be. Clearly this meant they would have more success making a group than anything else.

We know the producers knew of Liam and Louis. I think they started with Liam - and again this is all before we even got to the filmed auditions. I think they had the idea to make the band with these 5 boys from the original auditions and it was ALWAYS going to be them.

Niall filled the Irish niche. They had just opened auditions to Ireland. This was an easy way to gain success in Ireland.

Zayn filled the “ethnic” niche. How else is the group supposed to be “diverse” if they don’t have a POC?

Liam filled the group leader. The band was originally crafted around Liam and I will die by this.

Harry filled the “baby” role. He was the youngest. You think it was coincidence his age was brought up during his filmed audition? No it was meant to cast him as the “baby”. It’s not as intense a role as the “maknae” in kpop groups but it’s a role to fill. It also leads into him being marketed as “adorably slow”. He’s baby.

And Louis? Well Louis filled the “gay” role. Vee has talked about how obvious it is to anyone with eyes that 18 year old Louis was gay. I’ll get into why they needed a gay member in a moment.

So that was their initial set up: Irish, POC, Leader, Baby, Gay. Those are the roles the X-factor deemed they needed for a boyband in early 2010 and then they went about looking for people who fit those roles.

Now, like with any casting, it doesn’t always work out perfectly. You see it constantly in tv shows and reality shows. Audience reaction to people and also just general “character development” changes where people fall. Liam’s role of “leader” and “face” of the band swiftly fell apart because Harry is SO FUCKING CHARISMATIC. If you rewatch any X-factor stuff you can see it happen almost in real time. I could go on a whole tangent about how this affected Liam and Harry’s relationship but that’s not exactly the point of this post and it’s already way too long lol.

But what happened to Louis being “gay” and why did they need a “gay” member to begin with? It goes back to the idea 1D was never meant to be as successful as they are. In 2010 being gay and coming out/or being outted was like… pop culture candy. It was trendy. It got you promo. I’m not saying it’s right but that’s how it was. So I think they always wanted a gay member so that way they guaranteed a 3 album commitment from the boys. Album 1 rides off the back of X-factor. If Album 2 wasn’t as successful you pull out the gay card and BOOM instant interest in album 3. Enough to get Simon’s money worth from the band before they’re allowed to fade into obscurity.

Obviously that didn’t happen. Why? Well for starters the band was INSANELY popular. And secondly 🤷🏼‍♀️ Larry? They got put in a position with Larry where they couldn’t out Louis even if they needed to without outting Harry and ruining his “role” in the band.

And there’s my theory ✌🏻

751 notes - Posted July 23, 2022

#3

Here’s the thing about him singing Still the One in 2022. When he did it at MSG in 2018 we very loudly made it about Louis. And HSHQ is just like LTHQ. They see everything. They have to because it’s their job to see everything.

So that means they know that we think that.

Harry knows we think Still the One is about Louis.

And he still did that.

…

Anyway glad they’re still going strong ✌🏻

924 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

#2

954 notes - Posted August 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Larries since 2010: Harry and Louis are being forcibly closeted

Antis since 2010: NO ONE CAN FORCE THEM TO STAY CLOSETED

Larries since 2010: sure they can there are purity clauses that say they can’t do anything to tarnish the band brand

Antis since 2010: THATS NOT TRUE. YOURE THE HOMOPHOBIC ONES FOR THINKING THIS

Harry in 2022:

1,157 notes - Posted April 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[alwaysbethewest]

Mary If all the Pedro boys were secret 1D or Harry fans what would each of their favorite songs be?

Okay, this ask made me laugh when I saw it but I ended up having a lot of fun listening to these albums for the first time in years and contemplating the different characters. Some of them were EASY snap decisions and some I'm not so sure about but oh well.

Dave York - TiO (Mind of Mine) Push me up against the wall/Don't take it easy/You like it hard like me/It's what you need 🤡🙃

Dieter Bravo - Keep Driving (Harry's House) Black and white film camera/Yellow sunglasses/Ashtray, swimming pool/Hot wax, jump off the roof no offense to either man but the inanity of Hazza's lyrics fits Dieter well

Din Djarin - Fireproof (FOUR) 'Cause nobody knows you, baby, the way I do/And nobody loves you, baby, the way I do/It's been so long, it's been so long/Maybe we're fireproof/'Cause nobody saves me, baby, the way you do it should be obvious but Grogu is the subject of this 😭

Frankie Morales - Watermelon Sugar (Fine Line) Strawberries/On a summer evenin'/Baby, you're the end of June/I want your belly/And that summer feelin'/Getting washed away in you 😏😛 no further comment

Jack Daniels - Once In a Lifetime (FOUR) Somehow, it feels like nothing has changed/Right now, my heart is beating the same/Out loud, someone's calling my name/It sounds like you secretly a sad boy

Javi Gutierrez - Something Great (Midnight Memories) The script was written and I could not change a thing/I want to rip it all to shreds and start again/One day I'll come into your world and get it right/I'll say we're better off together here tonight okay I was thinking this was about Gabriela but I'm suddenly realizing it works equally well for Nic Cage lol

Javier Peña - Two Ghosts (Harry Styles) Tongue-tied like we've never known/Telling those stories we already told/'Cause we don't say what we really mean red plaid shirt slash season three in general. Oh, my love.

Marcus Moreno - Treat People With Kindness (Fine Line) Maybe we can/Find a place to feel good/And we can treat people with kindness he bops along to this one when Missy plays it in the car

Marcus Pike - Fool's Gold (FOUR) And yeah, I let you use me from the day that we first met/But I'm not done yet/Falling for your fool's gold ouch

Max Lord - Matilda (Harry's House) You can see the world, following the seasons/Anywhere you go, you don't need a reason/'Cause they never showed you love/You don't have to be sorry for doing it on your own full disclosure this movie was so bad I haven't rewatched it since it came out, so my memory of Max's character is a vague blur at this point. But I do remember: trauma.

Max Phillips - Alive (Midnight Memories) I said, "Hey, it's alright/Does it make you feel alive?/Don't look back/Live your life/Even if it's only for tonight" because he's not, get it? 🧛‍♂️

Oberyn Martell - Slow Hands (Flicker) Slow, slow hands/Like sweat dripping down our dirty laundry/No, no chance/That I'm leaving here without you on me sexy-sweet. I don't think Oberyn would probably like 1D's music but I do think he would fuck Niall 🤷‍♀️

Pero Tovar - On My Own (Flicker) Well I'll drink 'til it's empty/Stay out 'til it's dead/I'll wake up at midday and marry my bed/I'll kiss all the women/Get punched in the head/You could offer the world, babe/But I'll take this instead a man of simple pleasures 🙏

[flavorednarry]

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