#NCT 127 fanfiction | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

primehyuck · 1 year ago

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dress

this is the hair, the face, etc

aka Mark thinks you look really pretty tonight (very “only bought this dress so you could take it off” / “can we hear it for the dress” esque )

word count: 3.5k

contents : pretty much pure smut, pussy worship, soft dom mark, oral (f receiving) , body worship - mark thinks you’re REALLY REALLY pretty, mirror sex (kind of), lots of pet names, established relationship, mark seduced me as i was writing this

“Don’t you look pretty?” Mark smirks at you from where he leans against the door frame and you smile softly at him in the mirror, taking off the jewelry you’d worn to dinner with your friends that evening. You place the items gently inside the white vanity he’d had made for you when you moved in together the year before.

“Thanks, baby.” you take him in, fresh out of the shower in sweats and a big t-shirt. He looks too hot for his own good, his hair the longest it had been since you’d met, freshly bleached strands curling over his eyes.

“Did you have fun?” He slinks up behind you, warm fingers toying with the thin strap holding your dress in place, his left hand shutting the top of the vanity before pressing heavy to the front of your hip.

You nod “It was nice to have some girl time, as much as I love spending evenings with the boys.” you scrunch your nose earnestly, thinking of Mark’s best friends who had treated you like family since day one.

“I’m glad, though you should have seen the look on Jisung’s face when he learned you’d be at dinner with your old roommate and he was stuck cooking for the rest of us” he murmurs and you can feel the smile on his face as he rests his cheek on your shoulder. The combination of his warm breath on your neck and thick lashes blinking over your skin makes you shiver “I was sad that I missed you before you left.”

“We ended up going for a cocktail before dinner,” you reach up to thread your fingers through his hair and he lets go of the dress strap to trace up the inside of your arm. Mark turns his head to press his lips to your shoulder, pretty brown eyes blinking at you in the mirror once before skimming down the reflection of your body.

His gentle fingers drifting over your arm make your skin tingle and you can hardly breathe when he grips your bicep firmly, supporting your arm as he kisses over the shape of your shoulder, all the way to your elbow and back up again.

“Is this new?” He mumbles, the hand on your hip moving to tug at the hem of your dress. You nod, and he smiles before guiding your raised arm down to rest at your side, fingers lacing through yours. You watch in the mirror as he drags his nose into the crook of your neck, tilting your head to the side to make space for him there.

“Pretty,” his eyes catch yours in the mirror again.

“You already said that.” you tease weakly, failing to keep your breathing under control.

“My bad,” Mark chuckles quietly, left hand stretching to rub your thigh, no effort needed to hike the short dress up enough to expose your panties “I mean, you look gorgeous. Good enough to eat.”

You're surprised your knees don't buckle when he shifts his hand between your thighs to cup your clothed core.

“You think?” You mumble, turning to face him rather than his reflection. He blinks slowly at you, nodding once before his lips are on yours.

His kiss fills your lungs and you both moan. The fingers that were warming your core finds your shoulder to spin you toward him without loosening his grip on your hand. He presses you against the vanity, free hand finding a home on the back of your neck while he brings your joined fingers down, rubbing over where his cock strains against his pants. Your dress rides up to your hips when he pushes your ass firmly onto the surface of the custom table, lanky fingers digging into your skin.

“You’ll have to let me take you somewhere in this, love showing you off” he mumbles against your lips before trailing his own over your chin and down your throat “somewhere I can fuck you while you're wearing it.” You feel his cock jump at his own words, arching your chest into him when he licks gently over the swell of your breast on display beneath the low cut neck of the dress.

“Anytime,” you gasp, the hand not pressed between your bodies pulling gently at his hair in an effort to bring his mouth to yours again. He complies easily, pushing your intertwined knuckles into your clothed pussy and you feel him rut against your forearm at the damp spot growing there.

“Shit, the thought of me fucking your perfect pussy in public turns you on that much?” He stops kissing you for a second to tease meanly before taking both of his hands away from your body and you have to plant yours on the vanity to stop your head from banging into the mirror behind you.

“I want you to fuck me now” you pout, reaching pathetically for the fabric of his baggy clothes, but he’s just out of reach. You huff at him, quickly going for your own dress.

“Be patient baby, please. You’ve been able to see yourself all night.” he tuts, having to step between your legs to hold your wrists still “let me spend some time with the dress, too.”

You whimper when he drags your hips to the edge of the sleek wood to grind you against him, “Fuck, you drive me crazy.”

You take advantage of his hands being on your hips to wrap your fingers through his damp hair, dragging his mouth to yours. Mark’s hands are everywhere; pulling your dress up to your waist, leaving hot prints in the wake of his fingers, gliding over the skin of your thighs before hooking beneath your knees to keep your legs open. When you try to wrap your arms around his neck he easily pulls out of your desperate grasp, but you can see the wanton look in his heavily lidded eyes.

“Gonna make you feel as good as you look,” he rasps and you nod eagerly. His fingers drag over the straps of the dress before deciding against it, leaving your upper body covered “If that's even possible.”

He pulls you off of the vanity and guides you to the bed, keeping your body flush to his until he lays you back onto the mattress. The mirror hanging on the wall above the desk tilts down so you can see your reflection from the edge of mattress, the way Mark had specifically designed it.

“That’s better, want you to watch.” he smiles, glancing behind him to make sure the only part of yourself you can't see is what he's blocking with his own body as he drops to his knees between your legs. He rubs the heel of his palm into your clothed center, fingers digging into your pubic bone while he peppers kisses up your legs. His hand keeps your hips from bucking up when he licks heavily into the crease of your thigh before he moves his palm to press a wet, open mouthed kiss to your underwear. He sucks the fabric between his lips before his strong fingers pull your underwear up tight against your pussy to perfectly outline your already engorged clit and Mark’s cheek rests heavily where his mouth had just been on your thigh.

“Shit, baby.” he groans, stretching the fabric of your underwear in his fist, shifting it side to side and watching your lips move with it “I did this to you?” he asks gruffly, face sliding further up your leg until you can feel his breath on your soaked core.

You choke out a weak affirmation as he releases your panties, moaning when the stretched out fabric sticks to you. Your whole body shudders when he leans forward, nosing over your clit and inhaling deeply, dark lashes fluttering prettily against his cheeks.

“Mark, please-“ you gasp when he opens his mouth fully over you, dragging your panties away from your skin with his teeth and sucking at the ruined fabric.

Sometimes Mark feels a little pathetic between your legs, completely intoxicated, essentially trying to drink the taste of your pussy off of your underwear. The fact that he's so desperate for you, and yet he still has complete control never fails to inflate his ego, and as always it has his dick straining painfully against his sweats.

He moves the limp fabric to the side and uses two eager fingers to pull you apart, exposing your clit and Mark swears he sees it pulse, the idea making pre-cum leak from his dick like a broken faucet.

“Could stare at this pretty pussy all day,” he murmurs, not even looking up at you “but then I wouldn’t be able to taste it.”

You both let out sighs of relief when his tongue finally makes contact, laving over your wet folds. He moves urgently, wanting to touch you everywhere but settling with one hand palming gently over your inner thigh, the other keeping your hole open for his tongue to fuck into. When you open your eyes to look down you see his own closed gently, blissed out as he sucks your clit into his mouth.

Your eyes flicker toward the mirror, gaze following the firm circles Mark is tracing into the skin of your thigh, the callouses from hours of guitar make goosebumps rise on your skin. You wish he’d take his shirt off, the black material stretches over his strong shoulders as he moves his mouth over your pussy. You lace your fingers through his blonde waves, his moan vibrating through you when you tug at his scalp. He moves his mouth over you with intention, wetting his chin and nose as he buries into you, never spending too much time in one spot in an effort to spend as long between your legs as possible.

“Fuck, baby, I’m already so close.” you gasp, the few minutes of teasing wound you up like a clock, the gentle flick of his tongue over your clit enough to make your entire body shake. He looks up at you, blonde curls getting caught in his lashes. The deep brown of his hungry eyes is almost enough to make you cum until he suddenly pulls away.

“No, no, no,” you wiggle yourself toward his mouth and he has to close his eyes for a moment to restrain himself, wanting almost nothing more than to make you cum on his tongue over and over and over.

“Needy girl,” he leans away from you and you whine again until you realize it’s to tug his shirt off and toss it to the side. Both hands press back into your legs as soon possible, rubbing over your shins and thumbing into the pit of your knee before gliding up your inner thigh.

“You’re teasing me.” you pant, your own hand threatening to sneak down to rub over your spit soaked clit but he stops you, glaring.

“I don’t think so, baby.” he deadpans “you can make this easy or you can make this hard.”

“I make you hard.” You smirk, attitude overpowering your need to orgasm and Mark tilts his head in surprise.

“You know eating your pretty pussy does more than just make me hard.” He raises an eyebrow, reminding you gently of all the times he’s cum from grinding into the mattress while going down on you “makes me fucking crazy.”

Your breathy laugh turns to a moan when he puts his mouth back on you, nose buried in your skin. He drapes your thighs over his bare shoulders and it takes what feels like less than a minute of his tongue rolling over your clit to get you right back to where you were. You groan angrily when he pulls away again.

“Why?” you can barely get the word out, feeling your legs move up as your boyfriend shrugs beneath them.

“I told you to watch” his arms reach from around the outside of your legs so one hand can push your chin, directing your eyes to the mirror while the other drifts over the soft silk of the dress that might as well be suffocating you. You watch the muscles in his back flex, your toes pointing to dig into his shoulder blades.

He follows your gaze, guiding your leg down onto the mattress and shifting his tosro out of the way so you can see yourself, swollen and wet from the torment of his mouth.

“Tell me what you see.” He commands softly, the hand supporting your leg moves quickly to rub over your soaked center and you blush when you realize you can hear his fingers gliding over you. You both watch the reflection of his middle and ring finger slowly pushing into you. You’re so wrapped up trying to keep your eyes from fluttering shut that you barely notice the way his breathing quickens, mouth dropping open slightly, cock twitching as your pussy sucks his fingers in.

“I see you-“ you begin to choke out but he shakes his head, crooking his fingers up into your g-spot and cutting you off.

“No baby, tell me what you look like.” He turns his head to kiss the thigh still draped over his shoulder, fingers hooking up and dragging over your g-spot at a painfully slow pace.

“I look, fucked,” you moan when he nibbles at the soft skin his lips just passed over “desperate.”

“Hmm, what else?” He dips his head in to press his swollen, pink lips to your clit, smiling when you squeak weakly “tell me what I want to hear, angel.”

“I look,” you whine again, back arching off the mattress when he takes his fingers out of your fluttering walls in favor of rubbing them over your clit, so gently you’re not even sure you’d be able to feel it if you weren’t so worked up “pretty.”

You watch the back of his head nod in agreement, stroking his fingers over your clit in a lazy circle before dipping down into you once and traveling back up.

“That’s right,” He coos, free hand groping at your tits, thumb brushing over your perked nipple as best as he can through the layers covering your upper body “what makes you so fucking pretty?”

“My mouth,” you whimper, relief washing through your body when he keeps his fingers inside of you “my tits,” your hand reaches to cover his and he smiles up at you, expectant eyes waiting for one more answer “my pussy. You make me feel so pretty, Mark.”

His chin and nose are covered in your slick, moaning at the taste when he licks over his lips, forehead falling weakly onto your pubic bone, rubbing his nose against your throbbing clit as he nods in agreement.

“My gorgeous girl, every part of you is too fucking pretty for me” He moves back to face your body again, taking his fingers from your pussy and replacing your knee over his shoulder, reaching up to meet his other hand on your chest. He palms at your breasts through the dress, shoulders breathing heavily beneath your legs while he curses himself for not at least taking your bra off, dying to tug at your nipples beneath the silky fabric. Sometimes his attempts to edge you become self-torturous, but the way your whole body shivers when he rubs his nose into your clit harder makes it worth it.

You test his patience by pushing at his head, trying to get his mouth back where you want it and he concedes, but let’s go of your breasts to traps both wrists in a single hand. His pink tinged cheeks make your heart skip a beat as you watch him rub his face in your pussy, sucking your clit into his mouth eagerly before licking back down into your hole.

“Please, please, please,” you beg and he looks up at you with those pretty brown eyes when he hears your teeth chatter, pulling away with a moan that makes your back arch toward his mouth. He drops your wrists, unable to stop himself from palming over his pants, pre-cum forming a wet spot on the crotch almost as soon as he dropped to his knees for you.

“I got you, baby.” His voice is barely audible over the ringing in your ears. He uses the hand that isn’t on his dick to spread you as far apart as his fingers can manage “fuck, look at that pretty clit.” he’s sure of it now, your clit is literally pulsing, body begging for an orgasm that he can’t wait to taste. He glances up at your shivering figure, straps of your dress fallen off either shoulder, chest rising and falling dangerously quick.

A cool blow of air through his pursed lips surprises your system, entire body spasming as your orgasm hits. You think you hear your boyfriend’s “no fucking way” before his tongue starts fucking eagerly into your dripping pussy, pressure from his nose on your clit making sure the orgasm lasts so long you have to push him away.

“That was fucking incredible, I didn’t even touch you” Mark stands, stripping off his pants and forcing himself into you before you have the chance to take a breath.

“Oh my god,” you gasp at the same time he chokes out “so fucking tight”, making quick work in stripping you to rub his hand over your chest. His head falls back, mouth falling open when the aftershocks of your orgasm make you squeeze around him.

“Kiss, please.” you have pins and needles in your fingers when you lift them to his shoulders, pulling him toward you eagerly to catch his mouth. A sturdy hand cups your cheek, kissing you deeply as he begins to move his hips. His tongue is hot and heavy on yours as he fucks into you, catching every short inhale in his mouth. You want to cry when he pulls away, but are quickly overwhelmed by how fucking good he looks.

His strong chin juts out when he stares down to where his cock slides in and out of you with eyes so heavy you’d think they were closed if he didn’t mumble something about “your pretty pussy was made for me, so fucking wet”. His abs are drawn in tight, your arousal shining on the skin of his lower stomach and you reach out to touch him, dragging your fingers over the dark patch of hair growing below his belt line. He slows his assaulting pace to lean into your touch, grabbing your wrist and drawing your slick soaked fingers up his chest and into his mouth, sucking lewdly and shutting his eyes. His hair is a mess thanks to your desperate hands, sweat dripping down the side of his neck.

“So fucking dirty baby, know I'm addicted to the way you taste,” he grunts, dropping your hand in favor of spreading your legs as far as he can “the way you feel.” He slows his hips almost to a stop, dragging his cock out of you intently, listening to the sopping suction sound you make together when he slides back inside just as slow.

“Hear that, pretty baby, how much your pussy needs me?” eyes focused on where the angry, pink head of his cock prods at your entrance “can’t believe you’re real, and you’re all mine.”

“All yours,” you whisper, not trusting your voice “all yours.” his lips pull up smugly, but his eyes shine with adoration as he brings his thumb up to your mouth and watches you eagerly suck on the digit before dragging it down your quivering stomach to land on your clit.

“That’s right,” he can’t help the deep groan that tears from his chest at the look on your face when he starts to rub in smooth circles, your eyes fluttering shut “shit, you’re so fucking pretty. Look at yourself, want you to see what I see.”

He forces your eyes toward the mirror, hips picking up speed again while his thumb stays working over your swollen clit.

“Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum baby. Always make me feel so fucking good.” you moan at his words, thighs clenching around his hips “need you to cum with me, show me that you can take it all.” he practically begs, and you feel white hot pleasure shoot up your spine, the pace of his hips and thumb on your clit working easily with his hot words in your ear.

You make a noise between a moan and a scream, nails leaving indents in his shoulders, grinding your hips up toward his sloppily. His bicep shakes under his weight, fucking into you viciously, eyes focused on the blissed out look on your face that he knows is because of him.

“That’s it, take that fucking cock baby, take it.” all you can hear beneath his words is static sound when you feel him tense before he thrusts into you for a final time.

You can’t even hold your eyes open when he drops to his forearms to grab your flushed cheeks, kissing you lazily, letting you melt into him while he softens inside of you. You hum happily when his soft lips drag over your nose and cheeks, compliments falling on ringing ears and for a second Mark is nervous that he broke you.

“You okay, baby?” he rubs gently at the mascara smeared under your glazed over eyes and you smile softly up at him with a nod

“So good,” you assure him, lifting your neck to kiss him again and he happily obliges, laughing against your lips as you cage him in with your legs when he tries to pull out, murmuring a genuine “don’t go.” that makes his heart flutter in his chest.

“Not going anywhere, don’t worry.” he promises.

———

masterlist

#mark smut #mark lee smut #mark fanfiction #mark lee fanfiction #nct dream smut #nct smut #nct 127 smut #nct dream fanfiction #nct fanfiction #nct 127 fanfiction

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fairqves · 3 months ago

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﹙ 🎬 ﹚ ────START OF SOMETHING NEW

(🧺) ── 𝓙EONG JAEHYUN﹙정재현﹚ ꒰ 𝓰. oneshot ៸ fluff ៸ new relationship ୨୧ㅤㅤ WARNiNGS : not proofread ៸ kissing ៸ skinship❞ boyfriend jaehyun x 𝑓! reader ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ꒰ WC : 1.2K ꒱ SYPNoSiS 𐙚 in which you and your best friend of many years start dating, causing awkward tension between the two of you due to the new title .ᐟ ── LiBRARY

YOU AND JAEHYUN HAD BEEN BEST FRIENDS FOR AS LONG AS YOU COULD REMEMBER.

he knew all your weird habits, your laugh, the way you’d crinkle your nose when you were concentrating.

every embarrassing moment of your life had happened with him either cheering you on or laughing at you afterward.

but now, things were drastically different—things had changed in a way that made it feel like you were meeting him all over again, only this time with a fluttering in your chest that hadn’t been there before.

the two of you had crossed that invisible line between friendship and something more, and it was all so weirdly new.

the kind of new that made your heart race whenever he looked at you a second longer than usual, or when his fingers brushed yours by accident. ── 𝖬𝖮𝖱𝖤 𝖴𝖭𝖣𝖤𝖱 𝖢𝖴𝖳 .ᐟㅤ

the kind of new that made you forget how to act around him.

it was silly, really, considering this was jaehyun—he’d seen you at your messiest, your silliest, your most real self—and yet now, with every little thing between you feeling heightened, it was like you were on some sort of invisible tightrope.

tonight was the perfect example. you were at his apartment, a familiar place where you’d spent countless nights before.

it was supposed to be like old times—the two of you curled up on the couch, some random horror movie on in the background, a bowl of popcorn between you. just two friends enjoying a movie night together.

but instead, both of you were sitting a little too far apart.

the popcorn bowl was nearly empty, but neither of you dared to reach for the last few pieces.

the silence was comfortable but tinged with this somewhat strange awareness.

your knees were close enough to touch if either of you shifted just slightly, and you found yourself too aware of every time he glanced over at you.

you caught his eye once, and for a second, his gaze softened, his lips curving into a gentle smile that made your heart flutter.

but then he quickly looked away, clearing his throat, and you did the same, focusing on some random scene in the movie you weren’t even paying attention to.

the tension in the air was thick, and you could almost laugh at how strange it felt—this was jaehyun, your best friend, and here you were, both acting like it was your first time in a relationship.

eventually, the movie ended, leaving you both in a silence that felt louder than anything else.

jaehyun reached over to grab the remote, his hand brushing yours, and you felt a warmth rush to your cheeks at the simple touch.

he paused, his fingers lingering against yours for just a second too long before pulling back.

“you know,” he said softly, his voice barely breaking the quiet, “it’s weird, isn’t it?”

you turned to look at him, your heart pounding. “what is?”

“this,” he murmured, gesturing between the two of you. “being… like this. with you.”

you smiled, feeling your nerves settle just a little.

“yeah. i guess it is a little weird.” you glanced down, finding comfort in the way his fingers still rested on the couch cushion near yours, close enough that you could feel the warmth of his skin. “but it’s nice, too.”

he nodded, his gaze still on you. “i just… i never thought we’d end up here. i mean, we’ve always been close, but now…” he trailed off, looking away, the tips of his ears turning the faintest shade of pink.

you’d seen him blush before, but this was different. he looked almost vulnerable, like he was trying to piece together something he didn’t quite know how to say.

“yeah,” you whispered, not trusting yourself to say much more.

your voice felt too loud in the silence of the room, and you almost wanted to pull back, to crack a joke and bring things back to normal.

but there was something in the way he was looking at you that made you stay right where you were, letting the moment stretch out between you.

and then, slowly, like he was testing the waters, jaehyun leaned a little closer.

his eyes searched yours, and you could feel his breath, warm and steady, mixing with yours in the small space between you.

your heart pounded, your own breath coming shallow, and you saw his gaze flicker down to your lips for just a fraction of a second before he looked back into your eyes, as if asking a silent question.

you nodded, feeling an excitement and nervousness swirling inside you, making your hands tremble a little as you reached up, touching his cheek.

his skin was warm beneath your fingertips, and he leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment before he opened them again, the warmth in his gaze sending a shiver down your spine.

he tilted his head, bringing his face closer, his lips hovering just inches from yours.

your heart was beating so fast you could feel it in your throat, and you closed your eyes, waiting, feeling the anticipation build until you were sure you’d burst from it.

and then—he stopped. you opened your eyes to find him looking at you, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, and he let out a quiet laugh.

“what?” you asked, confusion flickering in your mind as you tried to ignore the way your cheeks burned.

“just… i can’t believe i’m about to kiss you, and all i can think about is that time you had that horrendous garlic breath during your first kiss,” he said, his grin widening as he tried to stifle a laugh.

your mouth dropped open, a mix of embarrassment and amusement bubbling up in you. “jaehyun! why would you bring that up now?”

he laughed, a deep, warm sound that filled the room and eased the tension that had been building all night. “i can’t help it. you told me about it right after it happened, and i just… i guess it’s something i’ll never be able to forget.”

you groaned, covering your face with your hands. “you’re actually the worst, you know that?”

jaehyun gently pulled your hands away, his laughter fading into a soft, affectionate smile.

“i’m just saying, if i kiss you, i want it to be better than that,” he teased, his voice low and warm.

your heart softened, and you couldn’t help but smile back. “well, lucky for you, i didn’t eat any garlic today.”

“good,” he murmured, his voice dropping even lower as his fingers brushed a strand of hair behind your ear.

this time, he didn’t hesitate—his lips found yours in a kiss that was slow and gentle, each second drawing you closer as he wrapped his arms around you, holding you like you were the most precious thing in the world.

when you finally pulled away, the two of you stayed close, your foreheads touching, a quiet giddiness settling over you.

“guess it’s not that awkward anymore,” he murmured, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he held you close.

you laughed, feeling like everything had finally fallen into place.

the two of you spent the rest of the night cuddled up on the couch, teasing each other about old memories, talking softly about things only the two of you knew.

only now, every touch, every smile, felt a little warmer, a little more special.

NOTE. FIRST NCT 127 FIC !! i can't believe they’re actually taking jaehyun away like just spare everyone the pain and take me instead pls.

୨୧ TAGLIST OPEN ‹𝟹 @mioons @nshmuras @suneng @pnghoon @shawnyle @laylasbunbunny @privareum @briefsaladfun @cyjzzl @sol3chu @txtlyn @d-dilemma @deezbin @iluvnikism @rikibwn @wonsprincess @niawonn @pockyyasii @kiss4noo : COMMENT OR SEND AN ASK TBA.

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prodbymaui · 4 months ago

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Labyrinthine. — 이민형.

taking up a good rush, don't try to fight it

PAIRING: mark lee x reader

GENRE: popular girl and the loner

WORD COUNT: 1k+ words

WARNINGS: public sex (kinda), pure filth, degration kink

SYNOPSIS: You don't crumble at any man's words, but Mark Lee— God, Mark Lee.

A/N: hi, hello, officially welcome back to me I guess? aside from these short fic/filths in my drafts, I want to announce that I'm finally releasing my series (fr this time I promise)! so if you're interested, you can send an ask to be added to the taglist <3 enjoy reading!

“Mark—!”

The said man’s hand quickly covers your mouth, shushing you. His moist presses against your ear, whispering reminders about how any sounds that you make could possibly blow your cover— but the brutal pace and unforgiving thrusts of his hips does nothing to help you do so.

Keeping you in place, the A3 bookshelf of the library shakes as Mark Lee drills his cock in and out of your soaking pussy. The clutch you have on his arm tightens before flying to the air. There’s a surge of panic arising between the two of you when a book falls down, courtesy of your restless hands, and creates a thudding noise that you’re sure is enough to catch the attention of anyone inside the room. But alas, it only lasts for a second or two.

“Fuck.. you just can’t keep it down, don’t you?” Mark rumbles on your skin.

He grips the back of your thighs, turning you both around. Your back then meets the cold wood that makes up the table. It isn’t long before you yourself suppress the moans threatening to come out of your mouth, eyes rolling to the back as a drool rolls down from the corner of your lips. As Mark engulfs your body, shielding you from possible prying eyes that watches the both you fucking like rabbits inside the university’s library.

“Look at me,” He calls your name in a grunt.

Mark watches your face twist with pleasure—eyebrows drawn tight, lips parted, eyelids fluttering as you struggle to keep your gaze locked on his through the haze clouding your senses. A wave of pride flares within him, feeding off the tension between your ragged breaths and his unrelenting hold.

“So– good.. Mark, fuck, you’re so big.”

“Yeah? You like that? Like how big my cock is? Look at you,” He tips your chin, trapping it between his forefinger and thumb. “Drooling all over that pretty face with those nonsensical ramblings. I thought you don’t fuck with loners like me, babe? What was that you said in front of your friends?”

His thrusts come to an abrupt stop, and a desperate whimper escapes your lips as you instinctively wrap your legs tighter around his hips, pulling him closer. The sudden pause drives a surge of frustration through you, your body betraying you with silent pleas for more, each movement a wordless protest against the unbearable tease.

“No no no..” You mumble.

Mark chuckles, steadying your shaking head using the fingers that holds you before placing a gentle kiss on your lips. The soft kiss turns into a messy one as Mark forcefully inserts his tongue in your mouth, exploring every surface— the taste of him clinging onto your tongue is a proof of your submission to him prior to being laid on the table, fucked out.

“Tell me, darling.”

Your hands scrambles at the thrust of his hips, the tip of his cock prodding your spot.

“What did you say earlier to your friends, huh? About me?”

Gasping for breath, your mind scrambles to process his question. You swallow hard, trying to recall the memory he’s referring to, but it’s futile. No matter how hard you search, everything is a blur—your thoughts muddled, leaving you unable to grasp anything coherent about what you said or did involving Mark before this moment.

Mark scoffs, his thumb slithers from your chin to the gap between your lips. As though a snake, it slides inside and lands your tongue. Wordlessly, you circle your tongue around the digit, licking it all wet before sucking it noisily, your eyes once again rolling to the back as your walls clenches around him.

The boys you’d been with always followed your lead, eager to please, prioritizing your satisfaction over their own. They were too intimidated by someone as desirable as you, treating it like a once-in-a-lifetime chance they couldn’t afford to ruin. You never allowed any of them to feel like they had the upper hand, even in the bedroom, moreover gave them the power to degrade you as a brainless cockslut.

But Mark Lee?

“Did I fucked you dumb? Or are popular girls like you already this dumb sans getting a taste of big cocks?”

God–

You’d let him degrade you anytime. The thought alone sends a thrill down your spine. You’d drop to your knees without a second thought, craving his approval, ready to do whatever it takes to satisfy him, no matter the time or place. The power he holds over you is intoxicating, and you'd willingly surrender to it, knowing that as long as he’s in control, you’ll get exactly what you need—no questions asked, no limits.

Who could have guessed that *four-eyed Mark*, the insufferable teacher’s pet and the quiet, bookish loner everyone overlooked, would be the one to make you crumble? The irony isn’t lost on you. The same guy you once barely noticed, always tucked away in the corner with his nose in a textbook, is now the one you can’t resist. His grip on you—both physical and mental—is undeniable, and the thought of how easily you’ve surrendered to him ignites something deep within. It’s almost laughable how the tables have turned, yet here you are, completely at his mercy.

As his words push you over the edge, your body trembles uncontrollably beneath him, each wave of pleasure making you quake in his arms. Mark tightens his grip around you, holding you steady as his pace gradually slows, savoring every second of your shared release. His head tilts back, eyes squeezed shut, as he lets the intensity of the moment wash over him, matching the rhythm of your climax with his own. The room feels charged, heavy with the lingering heat between you both.

Finally, his movements still, and the two of you are left in the afterglow, breaths mingling as the world beyond seems to fade away. With a gentle sigh, Mark rests his forehead against yours, the quiet hum of satisfaction thick in the air. For a moment, neither of you speak—there’s no need. The unspoken connection hangs in the space between you, solid and undeniable, as everything else fades into the background.

830 notes · View notes

vad-hander · 1 month ago

Text

NOW, ARE YOU HAPPY? Holiday Special

pairing: idol!Jaehyun x reader

others: idol!Taeyong

genre: one-shot, romance, smut, fluff, angst, family au

warnings: parents au, proposal, marriage, angsty conversations, but mostly romance and family life

words: 12,5 k

summary: after your pathetic attempt to leave Jaehyun in the past, you two finally found a way to make this relationship work. with your newborn baby, the two of you enjoy the domesticity of this relationship, aftertastes of your previous decisions and Jaehyun's job souring your life slightly. But the man that you love finds a way to make it all up to you on the New Years night.

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this is a holiday special for Now, are you happy? You could read this as a separate story, but for better understanding of certain lines I suggest reading the original fic first

________

“I got it!“ You announced, the shopping bag in your arm entering the room before you. “I was lucky enough to find everything we needed at our convenience store.“ you finally lowered your hand to see your family, your voice completely changing in a little squeal “Hello my little baby angel!“ You left the bag at the entrance of your living room and ran to pepper kisses over your daughter’s cheeks.

“She woke up maybe 10 minutes ago and was immediately upset she couldn’t see mommy.“ Jaehyun continued to bounce a little with the baby in his arms even though she was completely calm by now.

“I think she gets upset even when she sees mommy.“ You chuckled, departing from them to pick up the grocery bag.

“I was trying to be sweet, gorgeous.“ Jaehyun chuckled, switching his arms.

“I know, but still“ you mused.

“Do you want to do breakfast or do you want to take care of Sohee?“ Jaehyun kindly gave you options, you looked at them getting closer to hear your answer.

“I’ll do breakfast, thanks.“ you pecked Sohee’s cheek once again, seeing Jaehyun stick his cheek out for a kiss as well. You did exactly what he wanted - pecked his cheek and almost lost any interest in breakfast when Jaehyun’s lips caught up with you on the way back and kissed them.

“Okay, we’ll play.“ Jaehyun announced excitedly and walked the distance back to the play rug, descending Sohee on the floor. You watched her crawl over to the bite toy she loved so much and looked away to focus on breakfast.

“Do you need any help?“ Jaehyun called out your name, as you made your way towards the dining table to set the cutlery.

“No, the breakfast’s almost ready. Do you need help?“ You teased him blindly with a chuckle and turned around to see what they were doing. You wouldn’t be surprised if you’d see him calling for a little bit of help. They seemed to be perfectly fine, though, Sohee giggled away at the face expressions Jaehyun was making, while laying on her dad’s stomach and cuddling him with her tiny arms. Jaehyun took a loud breath in and as he leaned in and peppered kisses all over her cheeks, Sohee giggled even louder, with that pure and bright baby laugh that took all your breath away. You turned away and turned on the kettle, getting closer to your family right after. Jaehyun reached out a hand when you were close enough to sit you down next to him, when he’d sensed you wanted to get on the couch, and you not so gracefully plopped down, with your arms over Jaehyun’s shoulder, so you’d be able to lay your head on the back of your hand and not hurt yourself over his bony build.

“I can’t believe she’s growing so fast.“ You sighed, ruffling Sohee’s short hair.

“Want to give mommy a cuddle?“ Jaehyun whispered into her ear. “Will you give mommy a cuddle?“ you smiled, as your daughter reached out her hands to you and you leaned in, for her hands to reach you and pepper kisses on her tiny nose and cheeks. Your fingers held onto her back for support, as her moves were still wobbly. You leaned in more and took a big loud breath in off the top of her head.

“Ugh, she smells so good.“ You admitted for the millionth time, running your fingers over her head and making her giggle at the tickling sensation. “I can’t get enough of that baby scent.“ You glanced at Jaehyun, who looked at you two lovingly, while patting Sohee softly.

“Like… a fresh human.“ Jaehyun indulged your feelings. “She’s so warm and tiny and cute and squishy. I can’t let go of her once I see her. Like these eyes are just magnetic. I feel hypnotised and suddenly nothing actually matters.“ Sohee turned her head at Jaehyun’s voice just in time and they locked eyes, the man being completely soaked in in an instance.

“I feel that too, all the time.“ You agreed because he was so right about all of it.

“Did we make a magician and don’t know yet?“ Jaehyun looked at you, only for a split second before he was glued once again to his child.

“Aren’t we just obsessed parents?“ you giggled.

“Yeah, you’re probably more right.“ he nodded, scrunching his face up entertained. “Can you say ma-ma?“ Jaehyun sang, his eyes two crescent moons as he watched you stare lovingly at the human you created. “Sohee-ya, can you say mama?“ He sang once again.

“Da-da.“ she replied to him, making you both chuckle inevitably.

“Can you say na-na?“ You sang to her, Sohee losing her attention on the necklace on your neck, making you repeat yourself.

“Na-na.“ the girl replied, moving her body back to her dad, cuddling against his chest.

“Can you say da-da?“ You continued and with no repetition you got a very clear answer.

“Da-da.“

“Of course.“ You chuckled.

“Can you say ma-ma, though?“ Jaehyun tried once again, only to be met with another fail.

“Da-da.“ The girl said once again and looked at you with her big baby eyes.

“No singing for mama, I guess.“ you dropped your head back in desperation, only to lower your eyes and see these two being in their own world, Jaehyun peppering kisses over her temple, while Sohee tried to bite onto Jaehyun’s shirt sleeve.

“She looks just like you, not like I’m complaining, but she also only ever calls out for dada and if you’re there, only wants to cuddle with you. I carried her all those months and thought that’ll give us an unbreakable bond, but somehow all she wants is you.“ You pouted and squinted your eyes a little, Jaehyun not even trying to hide his amusement with a smile, his dimples popping the deepest, reaching out a hand to caress your cheek.

“I actually think she’s a perfect copy of her mommy.“ His thumb tickled your jaw.

“Yeah?“ You rolled your eyes a little unamused.

“Yeah, always clinging onto me, calling my name and asking for kisses and cuddles.“ Jaehyun bit his lip, watching you push away from his touch a little. “I think since you carried her while being so down bad for me played a role in her mental build. You’re very clearly bonded and she just wants and does what her mom does.“

“You mentioning my love for you in that way kind of makes it sound like you’ve got a very big head.“ You gave him a look.

“If I were you I’d be going around doing the same, though.“ He returned the look.

“Well my head’s not that big so I’m keeping your obsession with me very private, unlike you.“ You quickly got up, sensing he’d want to touch you somehow and moved around the room.

“So you do admit you’re all obsessed with me.“ Only to pause when he finished his sentence. You licked your teeth, shaking your head disapprovingly, watching Jaehyun move Sohee onto her play mat. The biggest grin not leaving his mouth even for a second.

“Oh, shut up.“ Jaehyun stood up, catching up to you, attaching himself to your back, wrapping arms over your torso.

“I’m sure if it was appropriate, you’d glue to me like that, right baby?“ His lips lowered on your shoulder blades at last words.

“Mmh.“ You agreed, trying to make yourself sound as dry as possible, and pressed a button on the coffee machine, moving over the room to check on the rice cooker. You didn’t even need to do that, it would beep, once the rice is cooked, but you just had to busy yourself to not give in and cling onto Jaehyun like he wanted you to. He continued to move with you, glued to your back, helping you reach the tallest cupboard to get a teabag out of it, helping you close it and dispose the packaging into a bin.

“Oh, by the way,“ he paused, watching you pour the water over the bag. As soon as the kettle touched the kitchen counter, Jaehyun continued to speak “Bad news, I got my schedule for December from my manager.“ He paused, his palm leaving your waist to squeeze your fingers.

“Yeah?“ You held your breath, fidgeting with kettle, you grabbed it once again, to place it back on it’s designated spot. He already said it was bad news, what exactly were you expecting?

“I have schedules on both Christmas and New Years Eve.“ You gave him a nod and grabbed both your cups to place on the table, Jaehyun let go of you with how suddenly you moved around. “Don’t go quiet, talk to me.“ He caught up to you, nudging on your neck with his nose, sensing that you were upset.

“See, I told you.“ You sighed, it was obvious, you knew those schedules are going to be confirmed before they were actually set and both his manager and Jaehyun were informed. Nothing ever changes. “It was obvious, every year’s the same.“ You really didn’t understand what he was hoping for and why did he even think anything would change. No one cared he had a baby, no one should even know he had one. Jaehyun being busy on holidays was a very normal thing to you, you always knew it, but somehow his hopefulness also made you believe in impossible.

“I still had a little hope.“ He admitted.

“I don’t know what you were hoping for.“ You shook your head. Not in a disapproving or upset way, just matter of factly. You never stood a chance against his job, you were lucky enough to work it our for yourself pretty early, it kept you sane through all those years.

“I’m sorry that it’s like this again this year. You were right, saying we can’t be a normal family.“ Jaehyun’s voice changed, the hold on your body got tighter. You could feel he was constantly reflecting on all the words you told him when you tried to run away from him, and it constantly made you not well, because he was making his life difficult, when the only intention of your words was to hurt him enough he’d stop loving you.

“It would be a very blatant lie, if I said that I enjoy loneliness on holidays. But it’s not your fault and definitely not something to be sorry about. I was expecting this to happen, so I’m not actually upset. I’m more upset your hopes were crushed.“ You turned around in his hold, caressing his cheeks with your fingers. “You might be away for holidays, but we’ll have you for the whole of January and then some more, and we will have the best birthday celebration for you and will be the perfect little family, while we still have time. Before she has to go to daycare and I will return to the office and all your schedules pile up like crazy.“

“About that-.“ You almost rolled your eyes, you knew exactly the words Jaehyun wanted to tell you. How he didn’t see a point in your return to the office, and there was no point in Sohee going to daycare. He had the perfect plan in his head, you loved his plan, it was still difficult for you mentally to just put all of you on his shoulders, it really felt like you wouldn’t like yourself anymore if he did that, you really didn’t want to go down that spiral. Work was the only thing to keep your mind occupied from spiralling down a hole of pathetic fear, sometimes loneliness and even helplessness.

“No, no, no. It’s not a discussion for this beautiful morning. Shh.“ you silenced him with your words, also closing his mouth with your lips on top of that. You weren’t about to give in to the devil and leave work, cause you knew for sure it’ll be so painfully hard to go back this time, if even possible at all.

“Still, it’s our baby girls first Christmas and we can’t even have a proper family celebration. I feel like shit.“ Jaehyun admitted, resting his forehead against yours.

“I’m sure she will not see any difference if we move Christmas by one day. Don’t beat yourself over this. You’re the best to both of us, always.“ Your voice suddenly turned to whispering and your mouth covered Jaehyun’s once more.

“I just hope she knows daddy loves her.“ He cooed, making you pause.

“It’s been months…“ You swallowed a chuckle, moving your head away from Jaehyun. “and I still can’t get used to you calling yourself daddy.“ You couldn’t hold back a smile, when Jaehyun gifted you the sauciest grin.

“Why can’t you, mommy?“ Jaehyun asked teasingly, leaving a kiss on your temple.

“Agh-.“ you shook your head disapprovingly, once again. “We’ll just stick to our tradition of celebrating in the morning, it’s our little thing and I love it. And I love you.“

“Love you.“ Jaehyun nodded his head and you tickled his nape to lift his spirits.

“How did your beloved boyfriend take our schedule for the upcoming month?“ Taeyong teased over the phone, clicking of his mouse feeling very much like home, you could almost close your eyes and imagine yourself in your old apartment, before Sohee made a noise that signalled she’ll start crying in a second and your eyes shifted to the watch.

“Oh, wait, it’s Sohee’s lunch time. I need to feed her.“ Your feet took you quickly over to her play mat.

“Like, now?“ Taeyong asked and the tone of his voice made you chuckle.

“Well yeah, it’s not like she’s going to sit and wait patiently until I finish talking with you.“ You shouted, hoping your voice would still make it through the phone as you walked away.

“But I’m here?“

“Yeah, and you’re on voice only, why you’re scared? and you’re on speaker, by the way. She’s totally listening.“ you gave your baby a smile and squatted to get her in your arms.

“Oh hello my little bundle of joy.“ Taeyong cooed over the phone in the sweetest tone. “It’s uncle T.“ He changed his voice back to normal as he addressed you. “Did she recognise me?“

“I think she did, she’s smiling. Wait, let me get her to food.“ You settled on the couch, your phone finally next to you and Sohee ready to get her milk.

“Food?“

“My boob, Taeyong. I just didn’t want to say it like that. I didn’t want you to think of my breasts-“ you sighed exasperated, lifting your shirt up.

“I wouldn’t think of your breasts even if I was paid for it-“ he sounded disgusted, you were glad he did.

“I-.“ Still there was an urge to fight with him on the topic, if only Taeyong would let you speak.

“Okay, can we quit the boob talk.“ You nodded in agreement, even though he could not see you. “What did Jaehyun think of the schedule? He didn’t read my messages. Where is he, anyway?“

“Shooting his brand deal.“ You bragged a little.

“Oh okay.“ Taeyong chuckled.

“Yeah he’s a big boy now.“ You laughed in unison with your best friend.

“So you’re avoiding the question because he was upset?“ Taeyong cut straight to the chase.

“He was, but we agreed that it’s okay.“ You pressed Sohee against your chest and felt her mouth on yourself.

“I’m a little worried for him and the way he’s been doing things.“ The clicking of Taeyong’s mouse paused, it made you alert. He only paused his games at serious matters.

“Why?“you tried to be nonchalant.

“He’s got that baby fever real bad.“ Duh, he very clearly does. You wouldn’t say it in Taeyong’s face, it’s clear.

“He seems fine to me.“ You lied to not get yourself all over the place once again. He did get the baby fever, he was obsessed with Sohee and spending time with you two, you could see it was physically hard for him to leave the house. At first you thought he’ll get over it as the time passed by, that he’d settle with the idea that he’s a dad now and lay back a little. He didn’t, it felt like he got more and more attached with every hour passed. You didn’t want him to feel like that, you didn’t know how to stop him from going through this. Talking to Taeyong stressed you out, you really wished you could go back in time and show Taeyong the things he says to you now, when you did very much warn him of the consequence.

“I feel like he’s losing his senses and the less careful he is, the more open you two to a risk. I only worry about you two being exposed to public, I know how much you’d hate that.“ It felt like Taeyong was beating around the bush and you weren’t about to jump at it and ask him straight what he wanted. No, thanks.

“Ugh, should I worry? What do you mean?“ Taeyong was very generously adding up to your anxiety.

“He’s just doing exactly what you were predicting.“

“Well yeah, that’s what I told you would happen. Ouch!“ You exclaimed and moved Sohee over to the other side.

“What’s wrong?“ Taeyong asked confused.

“Nothing?“ you squeezed your eyes in pain.

“Are you sure?“

“Yeah, breast-feeding hurts, that’s it.“

“It does?“ He seemed scandalised.

“Apparently yeah, unfortunately you’re not told that beforehand.“ Or maybe you are, if you planned a pregnancy beforehand, you probably would’ve read these things.

“But how does it, she doesn’t have teeth?“ You wanted to tease Taeyong once again, how he really wanted to talk about your boobs today, you held back, though.

“Do you really want me to go into detail how nipples chap and hurt like hell at certain angles because she latches on wrongly sometimes?“

“I have so many questions at that, enough boob talk for one day though.“

“Yeah.“ You chuckled in response, very glad to stop the conversation.

“I’m sorry though.“ He did sound sorry, you were thankful he cared for you at all costs.

“It’s fine, thanks.“

“So, about Jaehyun.“ Ugh, yeah. You kinda hoped he’d get completely distracted at that.

“Yeah?“ You made a question as you sighed out.

“Can you talk to him? How he should stop doing what he’s doing and get back to normal?“ Taeyong paused every two words, as if he expected you to interrupt him. You just sank deeper into the couch with every two words. You had no idea how to make Jaehyun stop. He was just a girl dad through and through and it came before anything else for him since the day he found out.

“Ugh, but I don’t know what he’s doing that doesn’t seem normal?“ You took multiple steady breaths, trying to sound casual, trying to not make Taeyong hear how you were blatantly lying and running away from this conversation. “I have no clue what you do at work.“ You were pretty honest at that part, you wouldn’t dare to see what they did at their work - you liked to imagine they were working in finance, or maybe real estate? Anything would be better than thinking of hundreds of thousands of people having an opinion about your close family - one thing is reading them drool - the other is bad mouthing them at every given chance. You went through that with Taeyong years ago, you would never want to even get a glimpse of that on the man you truly loved. “To me, he’s doing normal things, more family oriented, but normal.“ Taeyong sighed. “Just wait for his frontal lobe full development.“ You tried to crack a joke to be more natural.

“And when is that supposed to happen?“ Taeyong sighed once again. You tried to think what age it was meant to be, scratching your temple.

“Agh, scratch that actually, I think by now it’s fully developed.“

Your eyes darted from the screen of the TV onto your phone, your mom called you most likely to wish you a very Happy New Year and you picked up, cozying up more into the cushion.

“Hi mom!“ You chirped, your voice sounding foreign even to your ears since you haven’t really spoken much today.

“Hello darling. How are you all doing?“ You had to clear your throat to not sound so funny anymore.

“We’re great. Sohee’s sleeping, I’m watching her and telly.“ Your eyes switched between TV screen and baby monitor.

“We were just watching Jaehyun on TV!“ Your mom announced happily and you smiled, you did just watch him too.

“Yeah, me too.“ You smiled.

“He’s looking very handsome and happy. It’s a good thing everything worked out well for you two.“ she stated in the I told you so manner.

“Yes, mom, I know.“

“I hope we’ll finally see you get married next year-“ oh wow, what a wild turn for a conversation.

“Mom, we have not planned that at all.“ You meant that you’ve been back together for less than a year after that so called break and since you’ve gotten back together there was not a single chance to talk about marriage, or proposal or making any moves in that direction. Your only focus was Sohee.

“I know honey, I’m just saying we’d be happy to finally see you in a wedding dress.“

“Okay-.“ You nodded, confused. “Happy New Year, mom, wishing you and dad to stay healthy and happy.“

“Thank you honey, your dad is calling me, Happy New Year, bye-bye.“ You dropped your phone on the couch right next to you, your eyes suddenly focusing on the fact that it’s almost midnight, the show you were watching had all celebrities out on stage and you suddenly became very busy, trying to find in the crowd full of strangers your best friend and the man that you loved. Cameraman somehow focused on Jaehyun right next moment and you jerked back on the couch shocked, catching a glimpse of Taeyong, who suddenly waved and smiled at the camera.

Now that you’ve seen them, you were so invested in what was going on. One of the announcers, who also happened to be Taeyong’s friend you recognised, let everyone know that they’ll start the countdown after a short break and you watched that commercial break like it was the best directed movie. Broadcast returned back to the dome this concert took place in and big numbers popped behind everyone’s backs and as the numbers got lower your heart trembled, because you really wished you could teleport just for the briefest moment next to Jaehyun to give him a kiss. You watched the number change every second. 5…4…3…2…1… Your phone vibrated as soon as the countdown hit zero and fireworks ran over the screen and you looked down at what it was. So caught up in the notification you forgot how you wanted to wish yourself a Happy New Year.

From: love

Happy new year, gorgeous

I love you

Give our baby girl a kiss

And I’m gonna kiss you as soon as I get home

You were so perplexed, Jaehyun was on TV just a minute ago, how the hell did he manage to text you in the process of doing it all? Stupidly enough you tried to dial his number, what if this was pre-recorded and you didn’t know? Expectedly, you were met with no answer on his side, you watched TV for a few more moments in case you’d get a glimpse of him, finally texting him back.

To: love

How did you get your phone out? I’m so confused

I love you so-so much! Happy new year <3

When exactly am I getting my kisses?

Sohee says she loves daddy too

I hope you’re not staring into the phone like a lovesick fool

Your eyes glued once again to the screen, trying to see Jaehyun in the crowd of celebrities. Your eyes rolled down onto the phone and your messages were read. You looked once again at the screen and different singers were raising their mics to take their parts in the song, but you couldn’t see Jaehyun. You turned off the TV and with tiny steps got to your babies’ crib.

“Are you sleeping well?“ You asked, running your eyes over a child, that breathed steadily “Mommy and daddy love you, happy new year, Sohee-ya“

You watched her sleep for a little while, sitting yourself on the floor. Soon enough it felt a little cold, you crawled into your own bed.

“Hey, gorgeous.“ Jaehyun whispered next to your lips.

“You’re back.“ You raised your head from the pillow, smashing your foreheads on accident, but more importantly, smashing your lips.

“Yes, love.“ Jaehyun’s palm caressed your back and you pulled back when you needed more air in your lungs. “Happy New Year.“

“Happy New Year“ you pecked his lips once again “What time is it?“

“A little over 1am?“ You opened your mouth surprised, he must’ve teleported home.

“Did you run away early?“ You chuckled, running your fingers through his hair.

“I did. Couldn’t calm myself down until I get to kiss you.“ You melted and kissed his mouth once more. “Are you tired? Did Sohee not behave herself well?“

“No, I just felt cold and got in bed and somehow drifted off. Sohee was on her best behaviour and been sleeping very well.“

“We shouldn’t jinx it, I guess.“ Jaehyun smiled and caught your fingers in his.

“Yeah, we better not.“

“So, would mommy not mind if I asked her to get out of bed? And spend a little time together, before it gets too late to pretend like we met the New Years together?“ He laced his fingers through yours and pulled you to sit more.

“Of course, daddy.“ You beamed and Jaehyun stood up, only now allowing for you to see his attire.He was still wearing the suit you saw him in on the stage.“ Did you really, run away?“ Your fingers mindlessly rubbed the collar of his shirt.

“I did.“ He admitted once again, grabbing your waist to help you stand up.

“You look handsome, like you always do.“ You cooed, running your hand over his chest and hooking it around his waist.

“Thanks, love.“ Jaehyun pecked your temple.

“Wait, if you’re in a suit. Should I put on the dress I had prepared for New Years?“ your face rubbed against Jaehyun’s chest as he teased the skin of your back under your sleeping shirt.

“You prepared a dress?“ He asked softly.

“Before you said you’re busy this year too, I had a little hope you’ll be home, since you believed in it. I didn’t want to tell you, because I knew you’d get all puppy-sad.“ You pulled back and caressed his soft cheek.

“You should definitely wear it then.“ Jaehyun let go of you and watched you run over to the wardrobe and you took off your sleeping shirt and pants, looking through the closet for the dress, taking it off the hanger and slipping inside it in one swift motion.

“I even bought new heels in case we’d go somewhere. Wanna see?“ You beamed through the mirror reflection, as you saw Jaehyun walk over to you, wrapping his arm over your solar plexus and peppering your neck in warm kisses.

“You’re so hot, and sexy, and everything I ever could’ve dreamed of. How are you a real person?“ you felt your body get hot, your fingers instantly wrapping over Jaehyun’s neck to move his face to yours, he fought with you, as his tongue was drawing warm trails over your neck.

“Can’t believe what a cute dress does to you-“ you teased in a whisper.

“Can’t believe what you are doing to me, I didn’t even see the dress properly in this darkness.“ Jaehyun hugged you tighter, pecking your collarbone like he always does and stared at you through the mirror. “Oh, wait, the heels, you said, sure put them on.“ He let go of you and suddenly the world felt so cold and miserable. His palm patted your bum for a boost and you disappeared inside the wardrobe once again.

You really fought with the wish to just cling onto him and looked through the shoe rack with super speed, taking the heels out of the box and bringing them in your hands to Jaehyun. Slowly putting both shoes on the floor, you put your feet inside and finally got your face on the same level with the man. He smiled and wrapped your waist once again.

“I actually brought something, let me show you.“ He moved his fingers onto your palm and lacing his fingers through yours dragged you to the living room. As soon as your feet made a single step you paused. The loudest click of the heel against the flooring made the both of you stop. While you were talking in half whispers it slipped your mind that the clicking of the heels will be so loud and potentially could wake Sohee up.

“Oh damn, Imma take these off.“ You sighed disappointed, already leaning back down to take them off.

“Hold on.“ Jaehyun stopped you and you straightened your back back up, ready to hear him say anything, when he suddenly bent his body a little, wrapping his arm under your knees, and the next second his back straightened and your body lifted off the floor. You wheezed, probably making more damage to Sohee’s sleep than the heels and closed your mouth with both your hands. “Didn’t I say to hold on?“ Jaehyun smarted with a smirk.

“Oh my god, no, put me down.“ You hissed at the way he held you bridal style, escorting you two to the living room.

“Just a moment, love, I’ll put you down when you’ll be at our destination.“ Jaehyun walked over the living room, lowering your feet to the floor next to the kitchen isle.

“Oh no-o-o.“ You cooed immediately. “You’re so insanely sweet.“ You looked over the table that had the prettiest cake, a bottle of champagne and some very prettily boxed Jeju tangerines.

“I thought that despite us missing New Years Seoul time, it’s definitely New Year somewhere else every hour. We could just pretend we’re in a different timezone.“ Jaehyun bit onto his lip, looking at your reaction, smiling as soon as he was able to see your pouting face. You were honestly touched. He should’ve just gotten back home and fallen asleep immediately. He was on his feet since 4 AM, just a little over 2 hours before it turns into 24 hours and still he thought of you.

“I love you.“ You whispered, covering Jaehyun’s mouth with yours. Your lips carefully moved over his bottom one, running your tongue over it, to feel the plumpness. “I love you so-so much, sometimes it even makes me sick that I can love a man like that.“ you bit onto your lip, watching Jaehyun biting onto his lip harshly to stop his smile.

“It’s the least I could do.“ Jaehyun ran his fingers over your cheek.

“The least is giving me a kiss and going to bed. You’re doing the most, like you always are.“ Jaehyun pecked your mouth once, and then once more and suddenly you were kissing each other hungrily, every other thought leaving your brain as Jaehyun’s tongue swiped against your lips rhythmically.

“Wait, let me see the time.“ Jaehyun pulled you back to see the clock on your oven. “We should open the cake, it’s almost 2. We can’t miss this one too.“

“My wish already came true.“ You murmured, tapping the tip of his nose with your finger, his eyes making a circle with mischief on his face. He really had a joke in his head cooking up.

“Well, mine didn’t yet.“ cocky eyebrow challenging you for an answer.

“Oh, it didn’t-“ you teased “We must have different dreams I fear, then.“

“Mine’s not that far from realising so we’ll see.“ Jaehyun teased and worked his fingers over the bottle of champagne. “Do you think Sohee could somehow taste champagne if you’ll have any?“

“I don’t think a sip or two does anything.“ You chuckled unsure, it must really be nothing. Your fingers fidgeted with the cake box, finally retrieving it from the packaging. You could see only now how the top of it was decorated with fireworks and champagne glasses, saying happy new year. “Where do you want the candles?“ You looked at Jaehyun, that walked back to you with two champagne glasses.

“Ugh, let me see.“ he not so carefully plopped glasses over the rock counter, making your heart jump a little at the sound the glass made, watching him close the distance between your bodies. He purposefully flushed his whole body against you, wrapping arms around your shoulders. “Huh, let me see.“he repeated himself in a funny manner. Jaehyun grabbed your fingers, guiding your hand with one candle to a spot in the centre. He pressed the candle into the cake and pressed his teeth into your neck at the same time. The only reason you didn’t jump away was his other hand, that snaked over your waist and gripped the counter. You exclaimed more surprised than in pain, it wasn’t a nasty painful bite, he just bit down lightly and swiped his tongue afterwards. You processed what he did for a second, chuckling right after.

“What is it?“ You craned your neck to see his face.

“What is it?“ He repeated, trying to give you an innocent look.

“Why are you being weird?“ You squinted your eyes, maybe he was just a little tipsy?

“I just wanted to bite you.“ He shrugged and stole all left candles from your hand to put them into the cake, trying to give you the purest look.

“Ah-.“ you squeezed your eyes even harder. “It’s not only the bite, you’re a little suspicious this whole week.“

“Suspicious in what way?“ Jaehyun gave you a look and busied himself with candles.

“Like something good happened and I don’t know about it yet way.“ You really tried to turn around and see him, but his pelvis pressed you against the counter even harder. You had to continue craning your neck to see him.

“No, I don’t think anything like that happened.“ He made that face again and your heart was about to explode.

“Ah, just stop.“ you shook your head and looked away. It’s safer to look at the wall in front of you.

“Stop what?“ His nose nudged against your neck.

“Doing this face, I’m serious. I feel like I’m going to explode.“ you tried to dodge his touch, knowing clearly it’s not possible - you were practically squished against him.

“Just look that way, at the cake or at the clock. Let me get my phone out for the accurate countdown.“ Jaehyun suddenly busied himself, looking all over his pockets for his phone.

“I don’t care, if it’s not that accurate.“ You shrugged. It only mattered that he was right here with you.

“No, it’s important.“ He protested and seemed to finally find his phone.

“Well, okay.“ You chuckled, Jaehyun popping his phone in front of you two. He forced you to look straight onto the phone, the timing felt like he counted everything down to seconds, with the way the number of minutes turned to 59 and he not so coincidentally found a lighter in his pocket and lit up the candles. He was making you feel nervous with the way he took everything so seriously and you tapped your fingers over the counter, watching Jaehyun’s hand over the cake. He left the lighter next to the glass and propped his palms above yours, lacing them through.

“Make a wish, gorgeous.“ He whispered into your ear, as the clock was on its final countdown and as you squeezed your eyes, still trying to peek on the watch, coming up with a wish, Jaehyun wrapped you with his body more, leaning in so your heads are on the same level. “3-2-1.“ He counted into your ear and before one even left his mouth properly, you two reached to the cake and blew out candles in unison, Jaehyun’s mouth trying to cover yours even before the candles were blown out.

“Wait, the candle.“ a particularly stubborn one didn’t want to be blown out, and even though Jaehyun very forcefully turned you around and licked his mouth into yours, you weren’t about to risk setting your whole place on fire. “Jaehyun.“ You gasped and he really tried to get his tongue in your mouth, before you nudged on his shoulder and he pulled back and blew out the candle with a lot of force, turning back to you in an instance. His palm wrapped your jaw, turning your head slightly for his mouth and that pleasures ecstasy spilled over your body. Jaehyun hovered more over you, his tongue taking charge of everything that was happening. You laced your fingers over his shoulder from under his arms and tried to push his body backwards, so he’d get the hint and get you two to the couch. Jaehyun did not give in to your wishes, pressing his chest more against yours instead. You could feel his arms move around, looking for your fingers and to unwrap himself from you, as he did so, he also lowered his lips, making one messy wet trail from your mouth down your chin and neck. Your arms wrapped his head as Jaehyun sucked onto your neck and you were ready to moan his name. He forced your arms off his body once again, allowing himself to go even lower, until his knees hit the floor and you shivered, just at the thought of him lifting your dress up and peppering kisses over your thighs. Your eyes closed in anticipation of the feeling, Jaehyun ran his hand on the back of your thigh and you almost lost balance.

“Baby?“ He called out for you and you opened your eyes with a grin to see him, only to actually lose balance and swap grin to shocked shaking. Jaehyun tightened his grip over your thigh, when he felt you fall back, your arms gripping onto the kitchen aisle behind you for dear life.

“Wha-what are you doing?“ you asked with a very distinctive tremble in your voice. It was pretty clear, the action, what he was doing was obvious, you still had to check with him though.

“Asking you to be my wife?“ Jaehyun reached out more the hand that had a jewellery box in it with the ring inside. Your mouth opened at the size of the rock on it, your mouth opened at the fact Jaehyun was down on one knee on your fake New Years countdown. You were shaking now for good, tears trying to block your view. “Baby, will you marry me?“ He asked properly, blocking any sounds from your throat. You were one step away from chocking on your tears.

“Oh my god.“ You still gripped onto the kitchen counter with one hand, the other hand trying hard to hide your shock behind it. There wasn’t a minute in your day, when you thought huh, I expect Jaehyun to propose to me this month. He hasn’t even asked you what you think of it since you got back together, he never mentioned a wedding, neither did you and it made you cry so much harder. He stuck to what you two always discussed, not being a big awkward proposal, just you and him, soaking in the privacy of each other and taking a next step with no big announcements, you and him, like it always was and always will be.

“You’re insane.“ You gasped once again.

“So you don’t want to marry me?“ Jaehyun asked smiling, underlining the don’t with the tone of his voice. “Because I’m a little crazy? Over you, may I add.“

“I do. No, I will marry you, happily.“ You chirped, finally, colliding with Jaehyun, as he tried to get up, and you tried to get down on his level, resulting in your arms wrapped over his neck, him lifting both of you up to stand up. “My brains are all scrambled after the filthiest make out session we could ever have. I thought you wanted to eat me out, not propose-“ You gave him the tightest hug, your heart beating in your ears, as you were processing, finally, what just happened.

“I’m sorry I didn’t meet your expectations.“ He chuckled, sliding his arm up and down your back. “Since you said yes, will you let me get the ring on your finger? And let me kiss my fiancé? I can move those kisses south, if that’s what you actually wanted.“ you unwrapped your body from his, reaching your arm out, to get it in Jaehyun’s hold, the very next moment feeling the coldness of the ring over your ring finger and finally taking a look at the ring. Jaehyun held your face, giving you the most pristine kiss he could, like he didn’t try to eat your face off a moment ago. “I love you.“ He kissed the corner of your mouth.

“I was so lonely and heartbroken around this time last year, if you would’ve not let me have another chance in this, I would’ve never been happy. Ever. I just know I wouldn’t be able to have a life without you.“

“Oh, Jaehyun.“ You whispered caressing his cheek with the back of your palm. “When we were apart, I was never happy without you. Never. Not a single day.“

“If you ever decide again that we shouldn’t be together-“ you cut him off.

“I already did all the worst things for your career - gave you a baby, made you marry me and moved you in with me. There’s not a thing I could protect you from anymore.“

You were sitting between Jaehyun’s thighs on the couch, your eyes focused on the ring he gave you, his - on the bare shoulder that the dress revealed to him, and he was trying to fit about a hundred kisses on it, while also having a very mild, very lazy but oh so pleasures wedding conversation with you.

“When I thought of you and proposal, I thought you’d be a sickeningly romantic type of guy, not I’ll get my girlfriend moaning and then propose type of guy?“ You teased in a whisper.

“I just wanted to give you a new year’s kiss and then I realised I’m losing my mind and if I don’t pause immediately I’m going to lose the moment completely. I really didn’t want to ask you to marry me with my head between your legs.“ his tongue traveled from behind your ear to your jaw.

“Good choices only from my perfect future husband.“ You cooed and rested your head against his chest.

“Mmh.“ Jaehyun sighed into your shoulder blade, you could only imagine how tired he was, from all the dancing and singing, you wouldn’t mind him falling asleep like that and making you his blanket. “So… should I ask you?“

“What is it?“ You whispered back at him, stroking his forearms with adoration.

“Now, you are happy, right?“ He shifted under you and you knew the very reason he used this exact wording. “I must be right.“ He added in, as you tried to crook your neck enough to see him.

“I am, I’m the happiest when I’m with you.“

“That’s really all that matters to me in this life.“ Jaehyun moved his mouth closer to your ear and pecked it right after.

“Shh, it’s not and it shouldn’t be.“

“I could agree, but I would blatantly lie to my future wife’s face and I wouldn’t want to do that.“ His lips landed behind your ear once again.

“Taeyong said you’ve been acting funny lately, I can very clearly see what he meant by that.“ You tried to move your head a little away from him.

“Yeah, and what he meant by that?“ Jaehyun teased, continuing to kiss your nape.

“Like you’re plotting something and not telling anything about it…“ you walked around it carefully.

“Well, I did, plot something.“ Jaehyun brushed his fingers over the rock on your ring.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not what he meant. He knows you very well, and I kinda know you too.“

“Yeah, kinda.“ His throaty chuckle tickled your ear.

“Will you tell me?“ Jaehyun sighed.

“I was thinking,“ you gave him a nod, because he paused and made you nervous. “I’ve asked company, if I could publicly announce that I’m dati-.“ You twitched in his arms as soon as your brain worked out the ending to that sentence.

“No,no,no. Don’t even finish that sentence. If you’ll say it out loud I’ll actually believe you’re considering this nonsense.“ Your voice even trembled, you were mortified at the prospect.

“I asked company if I could announce that I’m dating a non-celebrity.“ Jaehyun repeated himself anyway.

“Tell me you decided to celebrate all holidays in one day and we’re on April Fool’s now?“

“I know it’s shocking, but I don’t want you to feel like you don’t matter. You’re, in fact, all that matters to me.“ Jaehyun straightened his back under you, making you as well sit more properly.

“Jaehyun, please. Why would I even feel that? I don’t feel like I don’t matter, I only say that I don’t stand a chance against your career. It’s different!“ You raised your voice a little at the end of your sentence.

“I just feel like now, that we have Sohee, I need to do more to reassure you.“ Jaehyun still talked back to you with composure.

“You’re making me dizzy.“ You tried to pull away from him, so you’d see his face and give him space and fresh air to reconsider his words. He probably was either horny or enchanted by the little human you made, he never has a chance to think straight when he’s at home. Anyone would get a little out of their mind with everything that’s going on. “I begged you to not be stupid, you swore you won’t be. It’s the only thing I ask of you, always. I don’t need reckless bravery from you, she doesn’t need it either. Crushing everything you worked for just like that is insane, Jaehyun. I wouldn’t want that for you. People are insane, they won’t understand.“ Jaehyun gripped onto you like you were his anchor, not letting you move.

“It’s not that. It’s just that-, It’s the rumours in media, that I’m dating this girl, just because we crossed eyes at some show and it’s getting big and company says I should just not read it, if I don’t feel comfortable about it. It’s giving me publicity and them money, they won’t deny and it’s making me insane. I don’t even know her.“ His arms let go of you, finally, when he sighed exasperated. You could tell by the sound of his voice this stupid thing was eating him alive. You couldn’t care less for things like that. Not when he was like a lovesick puppy whenever you looked at him, you wouldn’t even think of being jealous, if he even worried about that.

“I don’t care, who the fuck would care for something like that? I don’t read celebrity gossip.“ You turned around in his lap, finally seeing his hurt state, your fingers grabbing onto his cheek to hold his face straight forward.

“I know you don’t, but I don’t want Sohee 10 years later to open up a page about her dad being a fucking womaniser and thinking how he didn’t even have the balls to tell the world she existed.“ He looked you in the eyes and then again lowered them onto his lap, despite you holding on to his face.

“You paired with a new girl every month, or week, or hour, is not making you a womaniser, baby, if you’ve been dating just me, it’s nothing but words. Our daughter would never think like that of you. And she would never ask you to recognise her publicly, neither would I. If that’s what we have to live with, then we’ll have the happiest life like that.“ Your fingers caressed Jaehyun’s cheek. “You’re overthinking too much, you’re making me sick worried for you. We need to talk, if you’re still not able to adjust to this all, it’s normal. There is so much on your plate, while I get to stay at home and just take care of her.“ You leaned in, leaving a barely there touch of your lips on the corner of his.

Emotional spectrum of the night was making your head hurt, so much in just one night even for your brain. Somehow from horny to happy and excited you were falling into depressive and dark, Jaehyun really needed a break.

“It’s not just taking care. You’re living through exactly the reason you didn’t want to take next steps with me. I’m just so scared you’ll slip through my fingers and this time I won’t be able to safe us. I love you so much, I can’t lose you ever again.“ Jaehyun covered your fingers on his cheek.

“Jaehyun, love, you worry too much. We already have our baby, you asked me to marry you almost a moment ago. If I wasn’t ready to do that with you, I would’ve left your room on Doyoung’s birthday and never called you back. We’re here today, in this apartment that’s our home now, because that’s what both of us wanted, with all those but’s and no’s.“ You whispered against his mouth, Jaehyun’s arms moving to wrap your sides.

“I love you.“

"I do too, and I promise you, none of my concerns have to do anything with being a secret girlfriend." you gave Jaehyun a smile. You snuggled against his chest, closing your eyes, to enjoy properly cuddling against your fiance.

"You have concerns and don't tell me?" Jaehyun's hand on your cheek made your head crane to see him better. "Again?"

"Yes, and won't tell you because you worry too much about me." You gave him a nod and hid in his chest once again.

"For a reason. We already went once the wrong way because of that." he patted your bum.

"Maybe, we did, but still, I won't tell you. It won’t ever go the same path again." You reassured him once again. You would never try to leave him ever again, the hurt and the struggle, it just wasn’t something you knew how to live with. You were so glued to each other, you really didn’t know how to be separate once again anymore.

"Now you just have to let me know, I fear." Jaehyun suddenly chuckled, and you raised your head - he smiled and you felt relieved, just a little.

"Yeah, right after I told you I won't, you’re one funny man." You smirked back and bit onto your lip, anticipating an answer.

"I have a feeling you won't laugh too much if I set my mind on getting it out of you." You saw the tongue in his mouth make a circle.

“I would like to see that, I’m so curious you wouldn’t believe.“ His tongue ran over his teeth, with a little roll of his eyes. You really hoped the tongue movement meant he would get the answer out of you with it.

“I’m not really sure, though, you’ll be able to keep your eyes open to see. Saying this from experience, usually your eyes are closed pretty tightly, your mouth making these loud ass gasps and pretty moans.“ Oh- OH, he did mean what you wanted him to mean with that.

“Well, feels like we should just go to bed quickly, so we could check your theory and go to sleep right after, to gracefully announce our engagement to our families in the morning?" You teased, Jaehyun groping on the skin of your butt, while you drew little circles over his chest with your pointing finger.

"Everyone knows." Jaehyun chuckled, and you straightened your back.

"Is that why my mom said-" is this why this weird sentence even happened, that she wants to see you in a wedding dress this year?

"And moreover everyone’s invited to early lunch at our place tomorrow. Or I better say, today?“ Jaehyun gave you a very innocent look.

"What?! You invited a bunch of people and only said it now?“ You were ready to jump off his lap to go make the house presentable, if only Jaehyun’s fingers didn’t grip onto your wrists and held you down “We don’t have any food, the house is a mess-." you got interrupted.

"Gorgeous, I have it all figured out. Just be your pretty self, wave and smile and make sure everyone sees your four carat diamond ring?" Jaehyun sounded and looked at you like he was a filthy rich old man and you couldn’t get enough of him, when he was bragging about his wealth like that. He was in fact filthy rich, but also young, hot, smart, funny, undeniably sexy and all yours.

"Agh-, I feel like I’m in a fever dream whenever you act like that. At least tell me who’s invited." You involuntarily rubbed against his crotch.

"Just our families." Jaehyun caressed your neck with his thumb. "Actually, I invited Taeyong, but he’s convinced you’d hate to see him at our improvised engagement party."

"Why would he even think that?" You chuckled and stopped your hips from moving. Rubbing against Jaehyun, while talking about your best friend kind of made you ill.

"I have no clue, we agreed he’ll show up, if you’ll confirm your wish to see him."

"That’s funny of him." You chuckled and thought of getting up to your phone, if only your undying wish to be forever glued to Jaehyun disappeared.

"Should I take you to bed?" Jaehyun ran his pointing finger over your chin and cheek.

"Mmh, I’ll gladly get on top of you in there too." You replied in a whisper and licked through his lower lip.

"I won’t spare a second then." Jaehyun grabbed onto your ass cheeks the very next moment, making every cell in your body fight the scream that almost exceeded you, wrapping his hands over your waist as he stood up to hold on to you tightly. You wouldn’t fall even if he let go, your arms and legs properly wrapping him. Jaehyun crossed the living room in what felt like five wide steps even though you were sure your apartment was much bigger last time you checked. Your body fell into the softness of the mattress on your bed and Jaehyun let go of you just for a moment, to get rid of the belt on his dress pants and pull himself out of the shirt that you were pretty sure he had to return maybe by tomorrow. He then pressed you down with his bare chest more into the mattress, the promise of you on top already forgotten by both of you. Your fingers found their spot over Jaehyun’s jaw and cheeks, wrapping around them and forcing his face in front of yours.

You just wanted to take a good look at the man that made you this happy, at the man that loved you despite your sometimes idiotic ways of handling situations, despite you trying to run away, hurt him, make him hate you. Jaehyun gave you a heartwarming smile, leaning in and rubbing his nose against yours in a warm motion of I love you. You smiled back at him, running your thumb over his lower lip.

"I love you so much, my future husband." Jaehyun smiled wider, his mouth covering yours in a lick, that changed into a proper kiss, his mouth sucking in your lower lip, until your mouth opened in a moan to let his tongue in and right after you got in a clashing of tongues because neither of you ever wishes to give up the leadership of the other. And almost every time this happened, Jaehyun would buckle his hips against you as a distraction and also as a warning - I will tease you until you regret it.

He did just that now too, and you tried to fight back, letting go of his mouth to leave sloppy kisses down his chin and neck, Jaehyun knowing exactly your thoughts and crawling a hand under the hem of the skirt on your dress. He easily moved it up your waist and his fingers freely kneaded the bare skin of your ass, especially harshly, when your mouth sucked in the skin of his collarbone giving you a warning. Hickeys were no go zone for you at all costs, you weren’t about to give him one - you teased and got exactly what you were asking for - Jaehyun peeling your mouth off his skin and getting his own mouth on yours - overpowering you in a battle and taking the lead.

When it came to Jaehyun, you were horny to a tremble with a snap of his fingers, if he also had time to tease - you’d be not only trembling, but also covered in pleasures goosebumps. You didn’t need much foreplay, you didn’t have the privilege of having time for much prelude either. When you think of it, it was almost always that way. First you had to be careful, quiet and quick to not get busted at his dorm, the only safe space being your apartment, you had to be all that between his schedules and your working hours, and you had to be even more than that when you became parents and kissing and teasing to your hearts desires resulted in having no actual sex, when Sohee would wake up with absolutely no warning.

As if, babies could be giving warnings, when they planned to cry.

Now, too, you couldn’t know for sure - if she would still be peacefully sleeping, or wake up suddenly. Jaehyun bent your leg and let go of your mouth, lowering his face next to your thighs. He worked his mouth over the soft skin there, making you shiver the closer he got his wet lips to your very much burning heat. You whispered his name, really wishing to warn him, how you don’t have time and failing miserably because of his mouth on your left thigh and before you could process the action, he pecked you through the underwear, hooking his fingers to pull your panties to the side and swipe his tongue over your centre and then slightly pull away and just breathe. Your eyes focused on him, because you could sense he was waiting for any reaction from you. You breathed heavily, Jaehyun leaning in once again, to swipe his tongue in the other direction. Your palm trying to stop him, like you really tried to catch him by his forehead and push him away, but somehow missed and grabbed onto his hair and your hand forced his mouth more against you.

"We really can’t risk our time-" your hips jerked up with Jaehyun’s tongue swirling over you in multiple motions. "Sohee can wake up around this time-. Ah-" you breathed heavily, as Jaehyun worked his tongue over you properly now. "Baby, I’m serious." You finally pushed his head off you, you really wanted him inside of you, you knew for sure he did too, he’s going to have a very busy season soon, travel a lot, you just wanted any and every chance of burying himself inside of you to be used.

"Yes?" Jaehyun asked you lazily, like he couldn’t understand your worries, his eyes glued to the mess he made out of you.

"Can you fuck me already?" you raised a brow at him teasingly, Jaehyun smirking back at you.

"Whatever makes my future wife happy." You smiled and watched Jaehyun dispose your underwear. You had a feeling this will be his new favourite phrase. "Come here, let me get you naked." He whispered in a soft tone, his fingers reaching out for your hands so you’d sit up and he’d be able to get the dress off you as well. He did it quickly, letting the dress fall onto the floor. Jaehyun ran his eyes over your chest, focusing on your breasts with concern. "I think it’s healing." His fingers ran the ghost of your nipples.

"You’re just trying to make me feel better. I think she continues to latch on wrongly at times, it just hurts less."

"Gorgeous, I’m so sorry." Jaehyun leaned in, placing careful kisses around the areola of each of your breast. "It’ll be my pleasure to have you as my pillow princess." Jaehyun pushed your shoulders softly back down, his eyes still very much glued to the evidence of one of your every day struggles.

"Stop staring, breastfeeding makes my chest ugly."

"I hope you know how badly I wanna fight you about that, you’re lucky I can’t lose my time." Jaehyun pointed out, his fingers undoing his dress pants, that had the same faith to be dropped to the pile of clothes on the floor.

"There are a lot of things you’d gladly fight with me about." You watched Jaehyun crawl over you and setting your legs wider apart. "Are you sure you want to get married?" You teased, running both your hands from his collarbones down to his thighs.

"It’s my pleasure fighting with you over how perfect you are. My little miss perfect." Jaehyun cooed over you, lining himself up with you. "My almost mrs little miss perfect." He snorted a remark, diving in deep inside of you, taking all your breath away, because you thought he at least would say something as a warning. He made multiple moves, finding a pace that would not make the both of you bust too quickly. Jaehyun rolled his hips against you, burying himself deep, his thighs making that filthy sound of skin slapping against skin. Your fingers found his neck, pulling Jaehyun in, forcing him to open his mouth so you could play with his tongue. He let you, gasping as your mouth sucked on it. You shifted your legs, grasping on his waist and moving yourself towards Jaehyun as he moved towards you. Jaehyun grunted at the change of the angle, his little grunts filling the room as they accompanied every push of his hips.

His hands were all over the place, you could clearly tell his wish of teasing your chest, how he couldn’t find the right place to put them as they always ended up halfway to your boobs. You slid your fingers onto his pelvis, stopping his action mid way, you had a good idea how to eliminate the temptation.

"What you want to do?" He smirked, pulling out of you obediently. You ignored his question, raising on your knees to slide your lips against Jaehyun’s.

"Let me turn around." You watched your fiancé pull a little away, watching you gather duvet under your pelvis and lying on your stomach with your butt sticking out.

"I give you a ring and you chose to turn away as I fuck you, very ungrateful of you." Jaehyun teased and slipped back in, his playfulness changing in two quick motions back to grunting. You grabbed onto his fingers, that were keeping him above you, next to your head, trying to lace them through with yours but also not make him lose balance. "Do you like that? I bet you love it like that." Jaehyun lowered himself on his elbows, getting closer to your head.

You shifted, sticking your ass more up and letting Jaehyun hit the new spot and forcing a very pleasures moan out of you, him at first making the tiniest moan escape his mouth, stopping himself right after he heard you though, you were pretty sure to hear you better.

"Don’t stop making those little noises, it’s so fucking hot to hear your little cries for me, baby." You pressed your face into the duvet, it felt so good and Jaehyun moved around more, moving his palms onto your sides, forcing your back bend more for him and hitting it even deeper than before.

"Fuck-" you panted, your face against the fabric didn’t help you to get enough air in your lungs. Jaehyun also moved his arms around, pressing into your shoulder with his palm. Lack of oxygen definitely did something to your brain, you moaned into the pillow louder, your hips trying to catch Jaehyun mid action.

"I’m not lasting much longer." Jaehyun lowered his lips on your back, leaving kisses all over it. Your arm reached out for him, trying to hook over his neck to wrestle him onto the mattress. Like the man of your dreams that he was, Jaehyun was always able to read your thoughts. He moved from under your arm and plopped with his back onto the mattress. Your thighs straddled his before he could reach his hands out to you, and you lined him up with yourself, lowering with Jaehyun’s help onto him.

"Agh-" you cried out, lifting your thighs back up and sitting back down. Jaehyun held onto your waist, helping you with every move. You opened your eyes - you wanted to see how Jaehyun was feeling. You were caught up with his stare - Jaehyun looked at you with so much adoration and admiration, his lips adorned with the tinies smile that still made his dimples visible accompanied with little grunts that escaped him eventually. You moved your palm from his chest onto his face, trying to block his view. "Stop staring." You cooed, feeling Jaehyun’s lips kissing your palm that covered them.

"No, I want to see how long you’ll last with your riding." He smirked and let go of your waist, making it obviously harder for you to make those very rhythmical and deep motions. “Also just trying to see your eyes wide open." You moved your arm away, Jaehyun sitting up more and resting his back against the headboard, pulling you up with him like you were a paper doll. He let go of you once again, allowing you to continue what you were doing. Your hips were beginning to burn a little. Jaehyun’s mouth catching your shoulders and collarbone shifted your brain from the burning pain in your legs, not for long, though.

"I’m giving you pleasure and that’s your payback? Very ungrateful of you too. Seems like we make a perfect pair." You cried, by now he should clearly see your struggle, have mercy and take the lead from you. "What if you regret your proposal because we don’t have fun sex life?" Jaehyun tried to kiss your mouth, grabbing your neck with his hand, you moved away to see his satisfied smirk better.

"I think constant fear of being busted scrambled your brains. Now it’s not there and you think we lack excitement." Jaehyun sucked on your lower lip, you needed to push him away to return to him with a reply.

"No, I’m just constantly thinking what if Sohee wakes up now, and I haven’t heard my husband sexy moan as he cums."

"Maybe you should ask him to do things properly for you?“

"I’m afraid it’ll get to his head. He’s getting a little full of himself, when I tell him he’s the best at everything. I fear a little it’ll blow he’s head off if I also tell him he’s the greatest in fucking-." Jaehyun’s arms closed around your waist, making you sink into him with more force, your eyes rolling into your head with how good it felt. "Fuck, but he really is the greatest in this too-." You moaned and found Jaehyun’s mouth blindly, as his arms were pulling you up and down on him.

"Oh, wait." Jaehyun very suddenly stopped holding on to you, turning his head to the watch on the bedside table "What time is it?" He asked you and looked away again. "Let me see the watch." He actually had the audacity to reach for his phone and light up the screen. 2:58, you looked together with him. Why the fuck would that information matter to him now- " Da-amn, it’s almost three, looks like it’s almost New Years somewhere else. I guess I just have to fuck you into the New Year." he dropped the phone and turned you around, so you’d be finally under him.

"Agh, I really hate your brain-" you got interrupted with your own moan and Jaehyun’s mouth, as he slapped his hips agains’t yours in a pace that would finish you two off quickly.

“Sometimes I lie down and think how we almost didn’t have all of this…because of me. I’m so sorry. I was selfish and stupid.“ your fingers randomly ran over Jaehyun’s upper arm while he held you close to his heart.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, love. You have a heart so big you were ready to sacrifice your happiness for my career. It’s my pleasure being loved by someone like you.“ Jaehyun’s lips touched the top of your head.

“And the pleasure is all yours.“ You chuckled and swiftly wrapped your leg around Jaehyun’s torso, making your body straddle his hips one again. Jaehyun’s very warm palm touched your lower stomach, sliding it up to your solar plexus and between your breasts, until it reached your neck and he wrapped his fingers around it, pulling your face towards him.

“Want me to make you another baby?“ Jaehyun kissed your mouth, you could tell he was joking, if he wanted one more baby he would’ve asked you before you slid your naked body against his. “Us, a baby. I didn’t get to be with you through it all, I would pay all the money in the world if I could just turn back time and be with you two through all days and nights.“

“Shh, what if Sohee hears us?“ You blabbered the very first thing that came to your head to not get emotional once again.

“Well, I’m sure she can’t understand a thing, would be glad to have a sibling and already heard my attempts at trying to give her one hundredths of times, probably.“ Jaehyun clicked his tongue and rubbed your cheek.

“Stop, before I think you’re serious.“ You giggled, wrapping both your arms over his head. “You wouldn’t want two under two in one house with your schedule.“

“I would love to have whatever number of babies you would want to have with me, doesn’t matter if it’s two under two, or ten under five.“

“Ten?“ You almost laughed out loud.

“Well, if we have twins or triplets it is possible, in theory." He really considered that, huh? "Not like I want you to do that.“

“Well, it’s nice to hear it’s just a theory.“ You couldn’t hold back a giggle and kiss his mouth. You didn’t want him to know you’d birth as many babies as he wanted, because seeing him happy was the only thing you cared for.

“We, anyway, still have to wait for baby number two for at least another 6 months or your doctor will scold me.“ He stated matter-of-factly. How would he own that information, when you didn’t?

“Huh?“ You pulled back to hear him continue.

“No, it’s nothing.“ Jaehyun definitely realised he wasn’t meant to say that.

“What do you mean it’s nothing, why would you say that in the first place? Did you call her? Did you call my doctor?“ You squeezed your eyes and tried to choke him with your arms still wrapped over his head and your body hovering over his.

“I didn’t.“

“Jaehyun-“ you practiced your scolding voice at him.

“No, I swear I didn’t I’m not THAT nosy.“ Jaehyun rolled his eyes dramatically.

“Oka-“ you almost believed his eye roll.

“I asked her in person when I was taking you two home.“ You almost chocked on air.

“And what exactly did you ask?“

“How long we have to wait before it’s okay for you to do that“ he moved his body under yours in a thrust “again and possibly get pregnant.“

“You’re- insufferable.“ You chocked half way. It suddenly hit you that he did, in fact, want another baby ASAP.

“She was sweet about it.“

“I bet she was, you paid too much money for that hospital.“ You snorted.

“It’s not about money, it’s about you two having the best things I could possibly provide.“ You gave a peck to the corner of his lips, Jaehyun’s hand squeezing your bare thigh under the duvet.

“So what did she tell you?“

“Nothing much.“ He once again tried to play pretend.

“You’re a terrible liar Jeong Jaehyun, just say it.“

“That our baby is a big girl and I need to keep it chill for at least two months and that your body would probably heal in about 12 or 18 months depending on how fast everything goes back to normal.“

“You refused to have sex with me because of that?“ You were actually scandalised now.

“Did I? When did I?“ He scratched his head with humour, you wanted to smack him, because the first month of celibacy was obvious - your body needed it, your mind needed it, you were readjusting to new life while also healing. Second month was purely on Jaehyun and you couldn’t understand why exactly after Sohee’s 2 months celebration he dragged you to the bedroom like a caveman, when you were always there for him to take.

“You know that vaginas do not heal by magic two months sharp after pushing a baby out?“ You had to say it in the same matter-of-factly tone.

“But yours did?“ He smiled innocently.

“Way before that and I’ve told you times, baby boy.“ You teased.

“Mmm, baby boy? That’s new, I almost forgot you were an old lady.“

“I hope you know I hated this so bad.“ You sighed, plopping yourself on his chest.

“I know, gorgeous, I know.“ Jaehyun kissed the top of your head once again and like a magical spell you drifted to sleep.

______

I bet no one expected these two to return, especially as a family of three, it's been a few years and I've decided an open ending doesn't mean we can't imagine what could've happened to this couple. hope you enjoyed!

and I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas!

and will have a very blessed New Year :)

don't forget to like and follow for more <3

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softsan · 8 months ago

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˚ 🥀⊹ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐋, 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄. (𝐩𝐭.𝟏)

✉️ ・ 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬: | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 |

✉️ ・ ── 𝐦𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 | 𝐲/𝐧'𝐬 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬

✉️ ・ ── 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: Mafia AU, Angst, Kingpin!Taeyong, Queenpin!Y/N, Fem!Reader, Childhood friends, Betrayal, Enemies to lovers, Eventual Smut. ✉️ ・ ── 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: You were the only surviving heir of the old-time Mafia kingpin that had ruled the four territories. You were long thought to be dead, living the normal life you had always wanted...Until you run into a Taeyong, a formidable ghost from your past. You are then thrown back into the Mafia underbelly, reuniting with enemies you had hoped had forgotten you. Will you run away? Will you stand beside Taeyong, kingpin of the North, and be his queen? Or will you take your rightful revenge.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Possessive Themes, Future Explicit Sexual Content, Murder, Kidnapping, Strangulation, Torture, Weapons, Graphic Violence, Heavy Angst, Explicit Language, Alcohol Consumption, Mentions of Drugs, Betrayal, Morally Grey Characters.

✉️ ・ ── 𝐨𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭.

Past.

You felt all the air leave your lungs, your chest constricting as you tried to gasp for just one more breath. You heard the patter of your blood as it hit the hardwood floors.

“Y/N,” His desperate eyes plead.

“What did you do to her?!” Your brother demanded, yanking against the chains that were secured around his wrists.

“Good catch Taeyong!” One of your captors clapped his hand on Taeyong’s back.

You tried to lift your shoulders, but they refused to support the weight of your head. You were but a lifeless heap, carelessly discarded and left to slowly bleed out on the ground. The man’s sickening laughter echoed throughout the room, filling what was left of your heart with dread.

“Do it,” His voice urged, “Kill her now.”

Present.

“Today will be different,” You stared at yourself in the mirror, “Today I will smile, and I’ll mean it.” Your eyes circled down to your neck, your confidence waning.

“Come on!” Your roommate urged, “You can say it better than that.”

Your shoulders slumped in defeat, “You make me say the same thing at the start of every semester.”

Your roommate clicked her tongue, looking up from her phone. “And I believe this semester is going to be fucking fantastic.” She pointed at your white dress that cut just above the knees. “Look, we’re both looking cuter than ever. We have a new apartment,” She pointed to the living room’s ceiling to exaggerate her point. “This is our second year at college, and you, my friend, are going to put yourself out there.”

You shook your head in dread. “I thought we agreed that in this household, you can be the party fiend, and I’ll be the one that spends her nights binging TV shows on Netflix.”

Your roommate Jen threw you a dirty look.

“Hey! Who else is going to keep the universe in balance.”

Your roommate rolled her eyes. “The world is not going to stop spinning on its axis if you go out once in a while.”

“I highly doubt that.” You mutter to yourself, earning a playful hit from your dear roommate.

You and your roommate Jennifer had been cohabitating with one another since you were both seventeen. Back then, it had been a struggle to find someone willing to share a space with a teenager. That coupled with the awful reputation your foster father and sister had garner for themselves, you weren’t exactly considered an ideal house mate. However, to your pleasant surprise Jen was equally in need of someone to cover half of her rent.

You had somewhat known about Jen prior to living with her. She had been quite popular at your school, the social butterfly. Admittedly, you were a little suprised to hear she like you, had moved out on her own, yet you never pried.

Despite, her cheerful demeanor, you sensed a sadness akin to your own. You were both content pretending the other didn’t have secrets they’d buried deep inside their pasts.

The day had been too long, and the sight of a setting sun was a welcome one. A picturesque scene of pink and oranges painted the skies which backdropped Taeyong’s beloved city.

“Let’s get a drink to cool down,” Johnny piped, securing his gun back in his trousers.

Mark looked over disapprovingly, “You know you should really invest in a holster.”

“Not a chance!” Johnny grinned, “Taeil will flip if I make another extravagant purchase this month.”

Taeyong slightly shook his head, half-heartedly smiling. Taeil, his consigliere had only gotten on Johnny’s case after he bought two restaurants and three record stores on a whim. Johnny simply was dead set on never purchasing himself a holster.

Mark discerning Johnny’s lame excuse, decided to play along, “If you’re tight on money, why don’t we drink at the crappy-looking place.” He pointed to a shabby, bar with rusted molding at the end of the street.

Taeyong grimaced, he didn’t like spending too much time in disputed territory. The street they were standing on fell in a grey area, both claimed by him, the King of the North, and the terrible Black Crow of the West.

“We should head back closer to base,” Renjun cut in, noticing Taeyong’s hesitancy.

Taeyong had his own bars and hotels where he could drink and dine with complete ease. He saw no need to do so here.

“Let’s do it,” Johnny exclaimed, pulling a protesting Renjun into a friendly headlock.

“It’ll be fine,” Mark reassured, nudging Taeyong’s shoulder. “Nobody’s that stupid to take on all four of us.”

“I’m here! I’m here!” You breathlessly apologized to your manager, reaching for a bar apron.

“It’s fine,” He assured, handing you a docket, “First day back?”

You nodded, trying to catch your breath “It’s the first day, and I feel like I’m already behind on all of my classes.”

“Well, tonight should be pretty standard for a weekday.” He commented, his eyes scanning the empty tables, “I’ll be up upstairs talking to a supplier but, give me a wave if you need me.”

“Will do.” It wasn’t uncommon for you to be working the bar alone.

The 'Old Sand Bucket' where you worked was certainly past its prime. Its interior was outdated, half of the bar stools wobbled, and even the bar counter was unleveled. It just wasn’t a place that attracted a surplus of people.

You pulled your first load of wine glasses from the dishwasher, lifting them into the bar to be polished.

The door to the bar chimed, “Welcome to the Old Sand Bucket.” You said, without looking upward. “What can I get you?”

Taeyong gave the bar a lengthy overview. It didn’t appear to be suspicious, just the opposite. The dated bar was completely unoccupied beside the humming bartender who was mindlessly polishing wine glasses.

He examined you like the rest, evaluating the level of threat you were. Your head stayed down, occupied with your task. You barely spared a glance at his boys, who began ordering drinks.

You wore a simple black shirt underneath a bar apron with the ‘Old Sand Bucket’ labeled on its front. Your hair was tied in a low ponytail, revealing the curvature of your neck. At its base was a silky black ribbon knotted in a neat bow. Other than being pretty, you didn’t appear to stand out.

Taeyong hummed, satisfied the bar his boys wanted to drink at was nothing more than a dinky, uninspired establishment.

You heard another person pull out a wonky barstool, which made four people in your bar. Not bad, as you usually didn’t have customers come in until half past nine.

You placed down a bourbon and coke to your left—a man’s voice offering you a quick thanks.

“What can I get you?” You asked, finally looking up at the last man.

“Whatever’s good.”

Your eyes widened, blinking repeatedly, willing the ghost of your past to disappear back to your nightmares.

This can’t be real. This can’t be him. Please. No.

But he didn’t. He sat in front of you. His bored expression faded as he caught you staring. You immediately dropped your face, your face burning.

Taeyong furrowed his brows, confused. The way you looked at him just then… It was as if you knew him. He wasn’t mistaken. He couldn’t be. The way you were mumbling your answers, your arms shaking as you reached to pour a shot of vodka.

You did the best you could to keep a low profile, keeping your face down, and distracting yourself with work around the bar. You wanted nothing more than to abandon your shift— your heart furiously pounding every time you heard one of their four voices address you. However, at around eleven there was an unusual influx of people (what you believed to be a bachelor’s night out), therefore you needed to power through your discomfort.

You wavered for your manager to join you downstairs, while you stepped out of the bar and started clearing tables.

Taeyong kept you in the corner of his eye, unable to shake the curiosity that brewed in his stomach.

“Give us a smile, love,” Slurred one of the drunken bachelors, who had stripped off his shoes and was now wearing one on his head.

You complied, in order not to make a scene. You reached over his table to pick up one of the empty pints. You felt the irksome feeling of fingers brushing against your neck. You jumped back, dropping your tray. Your hands immediately shot to your neck, clasping where your black ribbon ought to be.

The shattering of glass made Taeyong stand, interrupting Renjun mid-sentence. Your eyes were aflame with anger, your mouth parting in horror. You were trying desperately to conceal the base of your neck.

Without a second thought, Taeyong approached, pulling the drunken patron up by his wrinkled collar. The man began sloppily flailing, trying to make his pathetic getaway.

Taeyong snatched the black ribbon out of his hand, before not so gently throwing him to the ground.

“I believe this belongs to you.” Taeyong stepped forward, extending his arm in your direction.

You instinctively stepped back, your eyes narrowing on the black ribbon between his fingers. There was no way for you to reach for your ribbon without exposing your neck.

“You keep it.” You said as firmly as you could, turning your back to him.

He watched as you retreated to one of the back rooms, his interest in you only spiking.

You hid yourself in one of the alcohol storerooms, searching for something to cover up your neck. You resorted to some paper towels stained with raspberry syrup. It wasn’t one of your greatest ideas, but it seemed to work when your manager came bursting in.

“Where’d you go?” Your manager pressed, “You left broken glass for me to clean up by table fourteen.”

"It accidently lock myself in the storage rooms again.” You lied.

Your manager sighed, ushering you out.

You did a quick scan of the bar, noticing the four men had since left.

“What happened to you?” Your manager pointed to the paper towels and raspberry syrup.

“Ah,” You pressed the wet paper harder against your neck, “A customer spilled a drink all over me.”

Your manager shook his head, “Go home and clean up,” He signaled you to grab your things, “I’ll close up,”

Scattered, you thanked him and reached for your rucksack.

“Wait,” Your manager handed you an envelope, “Some guy left you a tip.”

Who gives a tip in an envelope? You eyed it cautiously.

You waited until you had turned a corner before you used your fingernail to pry apart the sealed envelope.

Inside was a one-hundred-dollar bill, your black ribbon, and a napkin that read 'Thanks for your service’.

Taeyong kept his distance, hiding in the shadows. He watched you leave the bar, with your hand holding some paper towels to your neck. You use the other hand to tear open the envelope he’d left for you.

To his surprise, you barely acknowledged the bill—you were more interested in the black ribbon and the napkin. You stared at the napkin for a couple of minutes, your teeth grinding. You then scrunched it into a ball, throwing it onto the sidewalk with the envelope containing the hundred. You, however, kept the black ribbon.

Taeyong observed you as you slowly pulled the paper towels away, revealing a dark scar that wrapped around your neck... It was as if someone had strangled you with barbed wire.

A flood of emotions went through him, sympathy, guilt, and finally, coldness. He couldn’t help but remember a young girl who had experienced a similar fate.

You had died many years ago. Or at least he thought so…

NETWORKS: -

MONI’S NOTE: Woah! I cannot express how excited I am to dive back into this world. For those who don't know, this is an old fic of mine that I wrote like 5 years?! ago. I've decided to rework it and improve the story (also finally give it an ending). I would much appreciate your thoughts, comments, reblogs and likes are extremely valued.

TAGLIST: Let me know if you'd like to be added to this taglist!

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liliansun · 1 year ago

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haechan as your bsf who has a crush on you 🫶

(pt 4)

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lavenderbexlatte · 17 days ago

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Golden Age (Part 1: Pado)

nct 2.8k words female reader insert Reader x Lee Taeyong x Ten Lee (feat. nct ensemble) suggestive/NSFW

🖤 warnings: non-idol au, quarter life crisis au; situational/recurring depression, the horror of Being Known, falling in love, shady business practices, making friends as an adult, romantic depictions of seoul, polyamory bc i can't be normal about anything 🖤

connect with me! / masterlist

💛series masterlist

part 1: pado.

Tonight, you’re making a change.

Just a small change. It’s Friday night, and you’ve decided that you’re going out.

You never go out. A combination of newfound shyness – you didn’t used to be like this, you don’t think – and pure disinterest keeps you at home and around your neighborhood most weekends, away from the clubs and bars that light up other parts of town.

Around universities, in certain districts, there’s glittering nightlife. People come from all over just to play in the streets, get into packed bars, sip ridiculous drinks. To be seen, and to see. The street names are famous, the parties legendary.

It’s just not your scene.

Usually.

Tonight, you just want a little taste of it. And if it sucks, you can just go home.

That’s what you tell yourself, holding onto the vertical rail on the side of the metro car door. If it sucks, you can go home.

It’s dark outside, already firmly nighttime, people on the last legs of their commutes and college students heading to God-knows-where making up the rest of the train’s passengers. People with tired eyes and creased suits, hoodies and claw clips.

Them, and you, slightly self-conscious in your most bar-appropriate attire.

You’re not going out to pick someone up, or to be picked up, so it’s not an outfit meant to attract that kind of attention. Just something that won’t feel out of place.

The darkness outside lets you see your own reflection in the window glass, and you take yourself in, passively. You look good. You look good enough that it spikes your confidence, a bit. You’re still nervous, though, even if you’ve done this dozens of times in your life.

Get a drink, talk to some people, feel a little bit of novelty in your slow, easy, life that goes by much too quickly with not much in it.

It’s not that serious, really. You’ll be fine.

The train pulls into Itaewon Station, and you step out the doors onto the bustling platform.

Summer is coming slowly this year, you think, as you trudge up the stairs. It’s already warm out, but not humid yet. It’s honestly refreshing, after how cold this past winter was. Good call on your part, to come out and take advantage of the short springtime.

The difficult choice, you realize once you’re on street level, is picking a place to go.

You’re been to bars here before. Of course, you have. If you go to those places, you’ll probably run into acquaintances and friends of friends. The kind of people who are good to drink with, for one night, even if you’re not that close.

But you kind of want to be on your own, tonight. Even casual acquaintances bring social responsibility, and take away the thrill of anonymity, the making of a first impression.

Somewhere new it is, then.

Businesses change rapidly, here, anyway. Except for the few staple bars and clubs that outlive the rent hikes and ever-shifting demographics of patrons, places come and go every year. There’s no shortage of new venues to visit.

You wander down the main street, peering up the narrow alleys lined with chicken restaurants and hof bars.

One building that you pass looks completely redone, since last time you were here, all fresh paint and clean glass. You pause. The café on the ground floor is closed for the night, but there’s a side entrance that leads to the upper and basement floors.

At that entrance there’s a small blinking sign advertising a bar.

Might as well try a new place, you think.

The stairwell is white and scuffed and dingy as any in Itaewon, and you meander up to the second floor, where a single closed door awaits.

You open it.

The first thing that catches your eye is the name of the place, spelled out on the wall. The neon sign, much bigger than the LED one outside, reads “PADO” in blue script, with a little design of a curling wave over the top.

The space is larger than you expected, roomy, with rich dark velvet curtains lining the walls. You can’t tell if there are other rooms beyond them, or if they’re just decoration. The bar is gleaming white, the barstools are white vinyl. A big feature wall has beam projections of blue wave patterns on it, interesting swirls and lines.

It’s atmospherically dimly-lit, but by no means dark. There’s music, but it’s tastefully low.

There are plenty of people inside, but it’s not crowded. Small groups stand and linger, others sit at tables, their conversation audible over the pleasant music.

Venues that serve alcohol around here tend to be suspiciously loud, dark, and packed. Even the fun ones have that off-kilter vibe, manufactured or genuine, that something unsavory happens inside.

Not this bar. It’s clean, it’s open, it’s inviting.

You’re fascinated.

You like it in here.

“Welcome!” calls a man from behind the bar, as you approach to get yourself a drink.

There’s a menu taped to the bar, but you take a second to peruse the staff before you get down to the alcohol.

Usually you wouldn’t bother, but this staff is particularly interesting. There are three guys behind the bar, all in unique jackets, and they’re all…pretty. It’s commonplace for baristas and service workers to be good-looking to attract customers, but these guys are exceptional even by that standard.

The one who greeted you is also exceptionally tall, expertly filling up glasses with draft beer, an eye-catching figure in his white jacket and pink shirt.

There’s a shorter one in a purple jacket, all shaggy hair and bouncy energy, leaning all the way over the end of the bar to talk to a group of girls with a lot of suggestive eyebrow-raising.

And one other, medium height and medium build, leaning against the prep counter in the back, in a matching brown leather suit. His silvery hair is something like mullet-chic, and his attention is fully on his phone.

“Be right with you,” the white jacket guy says, when he catches sight of you. “Hey, can – oh. Where’s Dejun?”

The brown suit guy looks up from his phone. “Huh?”

White jacket rolls his eyes. “Dejun? To help customers?”

“Flirting, I think,” brown suit replies, pointing.

White jacket glances out at the bar floor, and rolls his eyes harder, apparently finding his missing staff member. “Well, you don’t fucking work here. But you’re behind my bar, so take an order, will you?”

This apparently singularly-capable staff member turns his attention back to the beers, and you just wait there, feeling exceptionally awkward.

Brown suit guy, for his part, looks at you as if he’s just noticed you. He has wide, surprised eyes, childish eyes. It’s endearing, kind of, the way he looks so flustered. His first impression gave off very cold and aloof vibes, but obviously, that’s not him.

He stuffs his phone into his pants pocket, and takes a step up to the bar.

“I don’t work here,” he says, echoes, “But…um. I can still help you. What can I get you?”

You tell him your usual drink order – something simple, luckily, because you suspect that if it was at all complicated, you would not be getting a drink for a while.

But the non-employee just nods at your order, and goes for the row of liquor bottles.

“I’m Taeyong,” he tells you. “I’ve never seen you here before.”

You answer with your own name. “And you’re right. I’m just checking it out.”

“Welcome, then,” he says, with a soft smile.

Taeyong slides your drink onto the bar, and watches expectantly as you take the glass and raise it to your lips to taste.

And when you nod your satisfaction, he asks, “Paying now, or opening a tab?”

You consider it. Paying now is easier, and you’re less likely to overdo it, but a tab means you don’t have to worry about money until the very end….

“Tab,” you decide.

Taeyong nods at your answer, that gentle smile taking on an edge that you can’t quite parse.

“Means you’re gonna stick around,” he says slyly.

You look over the rim of your glass at him, at that one. That sounded an awful lot like flirting. But a guy who looks like that…flirting with you…

“Do you want a table?” he asks you. “I can find one.”

“You don’t work here,” you point out, going for cheeky and hoping that your fluster isn’t showing on your face. “And you have to open my tab.”

“I’ll get Johnny to do that later,” he dismisses. “C’mon.”

He doesn’t open the swinging hinge at the corner of the bar top and let himself through the little door meant for exactly that. Rather, he jumps up and slides right over the top, and lands neatly beside you. Then, he takes off onto the bar floor.

More people have come in behind you, and there are only a few high-top tables left. The music is a little louder, to keep up with the rising conversational buzz.

Taeyong leads you to a vacant table with a Reserved placard on it, and flicks the little sign over. “As promised, a table. Reserved.”

“Not reserved for me. And you don’t work here.”

“Johnny put me work, you saw,” Taeyong says brightly. “Your table now.”

His good nature is infectious. You grin. “Can’t argue with that.”

“Have fun,” he tells you. “I’ll see you around.”

And with that, Taeyong leaves you. You can only watch him go, completely bowled over by what just happened. You watch him pause at another table on his way back to the bar to hook his arm around a short guy in a bright yellow leather jacket and drag him away, too. You assume that’s the missing Dejun, being forced to return to work.

You sip at your drink, and you watch Taeyong.

You can’t tell if he knows you’re watching him. You don’t think he does, seeing how he’s just back on his phone, hiding behind the bar. But you are.

Some bartenders flirt a lot, for their jobs. It keeps patrons feeling special, and as they get drunker, it keeps them spending more money. It brings people back, too, back to the bars with the nice, flirty bartenders.

But Taeyong isn’t a bartender here. If he was flirting – and you cannot confirm nor deny that he was – it probably wasn’t for the good of the business. He’s not talking to anyone else, that’s for sure. You can see the other workers buzzing around, chatting up the bargoers, making drinks. Taeyong has, as far as you know, only spoken to the bartenders themselves. And to you.

And yet, he stays over there, behind the bar.

The same shyness that keeps you home every night says that it’s just as well, that he was being polite and nothing more.

The hunger that brought you out tonight is keeping its unabashed focus on Taeyong, all the way over there.

After a while, the white jacket guy comes up to your table and introduces himself as Johnny, and takes your card to open that tab for you.

A while after that, you find out why the table you’ve taken was reserved.

“Excuse me?” comes a man’s voice.

You startle, still gazing across the bar at Taeyong, as he laughs with yellow-jacketed Dejun, and turn to see two guys.

They’re tall and handsome, strong-featured, one in a teal blazer over a teal shirt, and the other in tailored bootcut jeans and a red leather jacket. Just as good-looking as Johnny or Taeyong, just as peculiarly, otherworldly put-together. You wonder, fleetingly, wildly, if this place has some kind of secret dress code.

“I’m pretty sure this is our table,” says the guy in red. “Sorry, yo.”

“Sorry,” you apologize right back, “That one – I mean, Taeyong said I could sit here, let me-”

“Taeyong?” interrupts the guy in teal. “If Taeyong put you here, it’s chill.”

But the last thing you want is to be in the way, so you insist, “No, it’s your table, I can-”

“We can share,” the teal guy says. “It’s just us two, anyway. And Taeyongie-hyung.”

Before you can ask, the teal guy strides away toward the bar. Red jacket sits right down in the seat across from you, seemingly unbothered by his unexpected new tablemate.

You came out tonight for some variety, something different. This is not what you had in mind.

“I’m Mark,” he tells you.

You introduce yourself, too.

“How d’you know hyung?” he asks.

“I…don’t,” you say, nonplussed.

Mark leans over sideways and looks at you, quickly, from top to bottom. “Huh. Okay.”

His pointed gaze feels appraising, somehow, rather than objectifying. Nonthreatening, for certain. But you still catch the insinuation of it.

Apparently, you look like someone whom Taeyong would know.

“Nice to meet you, anyway,” Mark says.

When the teal guy returns, Taeyong is with him.

“I didn’t know if you’d be gone before Markie and Jaehyunie turned up,” Taeyong says to you, by way of greeting.

“I told her she could stay,” says teal guy, now Jaehyun.

“S’all good,” Mark agrees.

Taeyong points at him. “Don’t let Haechan see that you’re here. He’s already going nuts.”

Mark groans, and Jaehyun laughs, and you just sit there.

What have you walked into?

“Can we get you another drink?” Jaehyun asks you.

You eye him, rueful. “I really don’t wanna run up my tab.”

Taeyong waves his hand, as if dismissing your worries in the physical. “You’re not paying tonight.”

“Johnny opened my tab,” you say.

“Johnny was told to put your tab on our tab,” Taeyong corrects.

What?

Why?

“You don’t have to do that, I can pay,” you say, aghast.

Taeyong shrugs. “You can pay if you want to. But we’re more than happy to treat you.”

Mark nods, much too enthusiastic. “We take our friends out all the time, man, it’s chill.”

“Friends, being the operative part,” you say, but you can feel the smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. “I don’t know you.”

“You do, now,” Jaehyun points out.

You should be much more worried, you think, about being here at this table, somewhat a captive audience, with several men whom you do not know.

They’ve been nothing but nice, but they’re still strange men.

Even so, you’re…comfortable.

Contingencies run through your head, all your options should this night go south. You’re not stupid. You know how to plan ahead.

But this is what you wanted, isn’t it? Something different? Something new? You promise yourself that you would go home if it sucked out here. This is weird, but it objectively doesn’t suck. For now, you’re determined to enjoy.

“Okay,” you cede.

Taeyong’s gentle smile is back. “What’ll you have?”

Your next drink comes several minutes later, delivered by a very exasperated Johnny (you honestly wonder if he’s capable of any other emotions).

In that time, you find out that Taeyong, Jaehyun, and Mark are school friends of nearly a decade who are in business together. You’ve found that men who say that usually mean ‘we’re unemployed’ rather than ‘we own a business,’ but it’s not your place to call them out. Not tonight, anyway.

You find out that Mark apparently cannot hold his liquor, and as much as he protests, neither can Taeyong.

You find out that Mark is Canadian, and Jaehyun spent some time in the States. They switch to perfect English in the wake of this discovery, much to your amusement.

You find out that they’re regulars here.

“Usually we’re not even drinking,” Jaehyun tells you, sidelong. “It’s just a good place to chill.”

“At night,” Taeyong clarifies.

“At night,” you repeat.

“We have other spots during the day,” Taeyong says.

It’s a leading question. It’s bait.

You see it, clear as day. Taeyong is setting you up to ask, giving you a chance. An in. A reason to come back, an invitation to see them…him…again. You can’t believe it.

It’s bait. You gather up all your courage, squash down your self-doubt, and you take it.

“Like where?”

You left Pado with a bottle of water (forced into your sober hands by Dejun the bartender, just in case), three phone numbers (Taeyong’s, Mark’s, and inexplicably, purple-jacket bartender Donghyuck’s), and the Instagram handle of the café on the ground floor of that same building.

Saturday passes without incident. You sleep in, you laze around at home. Do some chores, doomscroll. The usual.

But on Sunday, you wake up much too early. You have plans, if you’re brave enough to go through with them.

Sunday brunch, you’d been told, is always at Kangaroo.

And you’re invited.

You don’t live close enough to Itaewon to justify going there twice in one weekend under any other circumstances.

You’re honestly not sure that you want to go under these particular and unusual circumstances, you think, standing in your kitchen and trying to gather up the motivation to get ready.

But then your phone lights up. A text message.

Lee Taeyong 🐸: hey! kangaroo café today around 12 like i said! if u wanna come to brunch w us :) Lee Taeyong 🐸: we gave you the address right?

You’d forgotten that he saved his contact in your phone with that emoji. The swooping sensation in your stomach, unbidden butterflies, embarrasses you even in the privacy of your own home.

Well. You wanted to make a change, right?

And if you dig through your closet for something green, frog emoji in the corner of your mind, that’s no one’s business but yours.

#nct fanfiction #nct fanfic #nct 127 fanfic #nct 127 fanfiction #lee taeyong fanfic #lee taeyong fanfiction #kpop fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios

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glamourizz · 3 months ago

Text

to my first... || l.mk

themes: friends, unrequited love, angst

warnings: gets sad, angsty, mentions of slight bullying

word count: 4.9k

based on a true story....

dedicated to the boy i should've told "I love you" to when I had the chance. my first love.

✒️✒️✒️

August 2008.

The warm summer air was no longer as prominent as it was a few weeks back. The chill in the air hit your tanned cheeks as you chattered away with the girl sitting next to you. It wasn't a big surprise to anyone seeing you beaming with happiness on the first day of school in contrast to the gloomy faces around you, bummed about the end of their summer holidays.

"Honestly, I am a little upset none of my friends are in the same class as me but hey! At least we have each other right." You smiled at the girl in front of you who smiled right back at you.

The teacher striding in cut your conversation short. A young boy trailed behind her looking confused and out of place.

"Good morning, children!" The teacher beamed up at everyone. "We have a new addition to our class this year. Introduce yourself!"

The boy looked around at us before gulping and muttering, "Hi, I'm Mark Lee. I used to study at Clover Elementary School and I'm 9 years old."

The teacher patted him on the back and guided him to his seat, two benches away from yours.

"Why did you switch schools?" One of your classmates asked echoing everyone's thoughts.

"My old school started an hour earlier than here." He said sheepishly making everyone laugh out loud.

You stared at the boy, a little shorter than you.

He was interesting.

December 2008.

As Christmas was right around the corner, the school and all its inhabitants were shivering with excitement-more with the prospect of holidays than with the festival itself but no one would admit it- and that meant classroom activities.

This year the students were tasked with making paper wreaths to decorate their lockers with. You and your mum spent the day before searching the web for all kinds of creative wreaths you could make and ended up deciding on an origami one.

The class was all busy decorating their own wreaths, giggling, and chattering away with their friends nearby.

"Hey, could you lend me a pair of scissors I forgot mine at home?" Mark asked the boy sitting next to him.

"Sorry, I don't have one." The boy said clearly hiding the scissor in his pocket. "Maybe Y/N can help you?"

Mark turns towards you looking expectantly.

"Sure", you shrug handing over your scissor.

He uses it before giving it back muttering a small thanks

A few minutes later he asks for your glue and a few minutes later asks for your scissors again.

"Did you even come prepared?" You ask him joking.

"I'll be honest. I completely forgot this was today." He whispered making you giggle.

"Oh wow! Your cheeks get really chubby when you smile." He tells you as you turn beet red.

The boy sitting between the two of you snickers. "Yeah, you should lose weight, Y/N."

Mark frowns lightly. "It's cute though," he mumbles under his breath to himself.

But you heard him and you couldn't help but smile at him.

He's nice.

September 2009.

Mark was sitting right behind you this year and you were relieved you had someone in your class this year that you know. You did not want to go through finding a new friend to hang out with again this year.

The two of you would get along well. Top of the class always competing over who would get a higher grade.

"You are a VIP," Mark tells you one day with a mischievous smile.

"What does VIP mean?" You ask genuinely confused.

"Very Idiotic Person." He snickered at you as your face contorts into an offended look.

You raise your hand calling for the teacher. "He is calling me a VIP," you whine when the teacher comes over to your seat.

"Isn't that a good thing?" She asks you looking over at Mark who had his "good boy" smile on.

"He says it means a Very Idiotic Person," you exclaim making the teacher let out a quiet laugh before half-heartedly scolding Mark who was still smiling ear to ear.

"Why are you so mean to me?" You ask him frowning.

"It's fun teasing you. You get cute." He explains leaving you with a small pout on your face as he lets out an endeared laugh.

You couldn't help but laugh along with him.

He was funny, sometimes.

January 2010.

Everyone was half asleep on the first day after Christmas break. Who in the right mind thought it was completely reasonable to wake up children early in the morning and put them all together expecting them to be productive?

"I have decided on the class president and the vice president for this semester," the teacher announced making all the students perk up. "Congratulations Y/N for becoming the class president and Mark for becoming the vice president. Come here and collect your badges."

You let out the brightest smile and walk over to the teacher to collect your badge smirking at Mark as you pass him.

A silent boast of achievement. You were the President and he was the vice president. You had power over him. He rolled his eyes at you. It was a healthy competition. It always had been.

The teacher soon left the class and you were in charge of maintaining discipline in class. As you stood up from your seat a paper plane went swooshing right in front of your eyes. You looked around trying to figure out who did it. And you were met with Mark looking at you with guilty eyes.

"You can't do that. Flying paper Planes is against the class rules. You are the Vice President!" You scold him frowning.

"Please. You are upset because you don't know how to make a paper plane." He smirks at you.

"So what?" You glower at him.

"Sit down. I'll teach you." He says before moving over to your seat crouching down and teaching you how to fold the paper.

You turn over to him to remind him they had a class to monitor but all you saw was his focused side profile and in that moment all words left your mouth flying away along with the paper planes your classmates threw around.

He was really handsome.

February 2011.

A year older. In the same class again. You had joked with Mark about how he was following you around like a duckling. He had laughed before jokingly calling himself your personal stalker leaving you giggling.

It was also the year he got a little more popular. You were friends but you knew he was good-looking. A little too good-looking if you were being honest with yourself. He got himself, new friends, and so did you.

It wasn't a big deal. You were never in the same friend circle. You had always had your own friend groups but his new friends did hurt you a bit.

They were the same ones who would pass comments whenever you were around.

"God, I really don't want to sit next to her." Your seatmate complains to her friend as you sit right beside her.

"Can't you go and tell the teacher you want to sit somewhere else?" Her best friend tells you a little annoyance in her tone.

"I don't know if I can do that." You respond back with a tight smile making the two girls sigh rolling their eyes at you before going back to their conversation.

You looked over to Mark who had just entered the class and was now making conversation with the girl and her best friend. He saw you looks at you and gives you a light nod. You smile back at him.

He was a little aloof.

March 2011.

You were hanging out by the lockers with your girlfriends during the break. They were all gushing about the boy band named One Direction or whatever.

You were just about to joke about them being boy crazy and how you didn't get the hype around the group but before you could utter a word, Mark walked in with his friends smiling at you and your friends.

"Hey, Mark. You said you liked One Direction, right?" One of your friends asked him.

"Oh, yeah. I love 'What makes you beautiful" He said.

"Oh my god, really? Me, too." You squeal not knowing what possessed you to lie out of nowhere. You hadn't even heard their music before!

"They are so good, right!" He exclaims with the biggest smile on his face making your heart beat so fast all you could do was nod your head. You knew you stutter like an idiot if you said a word.

That night you spent the night under the covers with your earphones in your ears listening to every song One Direction had released on repeat, occasionally popping out of the covers to see if your mom walked in.

He had good taste.

May 2011.

As the academic year was coming to an end, the teacher's kept piling on homework, assignments, and projects.

You were tasked with making a science project on the ill effects of pollution. You were in the group with the smartest girl in class, Mark, and a few other classmates. The leader being the smart girl was assigned with planning out the project.

And that was when you realized academically gifted did not equal having common sense. The teachers loved her draft and encouraged you all to work on it but you found it a bit impractical.

As days passed on, Mark, too, realized how incredibly difficult it was to bring her draft to life. All the while, the rest of your teammates conveniently gave up on the project whilst your dear leader refused to meet up outside of school.

Deciding to take matters into your own hands, you went up to Mark ignoring his friends who were hooting at the two of you as you ask him to come over to your place so you could do the project yourself.

You met up with him the next day an hour after school ended. Your mum, a craft enthusiast, helping you throughout.

"Mark, how much did you score in Math?" She asked him.

"Oh, 19/20" he answered proudly.

"And how much did you score?" Your mum asks you.

"16," you mumble a little upset.

Your mum just hums and goes back to instructing the two of you.

An hour. later you realize you might need some more stationary. Mark and you go to a nearby store to buy more paper and some paints.

"16 is not a bad score, you know?" he says quietly picking up two bottles of paint trying to make out the difference.

"Says you. You scored a 19." You mutter.

"So what?" He looks into your eyes dropping both bottles of paint in a basket. "It's just a practice test. It won't count in the future."

"What do you wanna be when you grow up?" You ask him as the two of you walk towards the billing counter.

"I wanna be a scientist. Do something to help people." He says as the two of you pay for the supplies before leaving the store.

"What about you?" He looks at you and you could swear you saw sparkles in his eyes.

"I want to be a doctor." You state with confidence. "The one that treats mentally sick."

"A Psychiatrist?" He asks making you nod. "They don't make much money though."

"So what?" You mimic the words he had said earlier making him smile.

That night as your mum put you to bed, she smiled at you before leaving the room and asked, "Is there anyone from school that you like?"

You laughed at her trying to rid your brain of all the thoughts of Mark that popped up.

He was the one you liked.

June 2011.

The academic year was ending in a week and that meant class trips. It was the one event of the year all students waited for.

Ever since you had the realization that you might like Mark, your brain had been a big big mess. It was only your luck that with finals coming up the interactions between the two of you had come to the bare minimum and you were grateful. Your mind was a mess every time he was around you.

You wanted to confide in someone but you didn't know to who you could tell this. In the end, you decided, you were going to confess.

He was your friend the worse that could happen was he'd want to be only friends. You'd deal with it when the time comes.

It was the day of the trip. Everyone was vibrating with excitement. For once your bags were laden with food and games instead of textbooks.

"I heard Mark is going to confess to Pearl today. He said he was going to ask her to go on the Ferris wheel with her and then he'd ask her out. He even got her a bar of expensive chocolate." A friend of yours turned around to tell you and your seatmate.

Your seatmate and you exchanged a look before she shrugged and turned around.

You'd be lying if you weren't a little hurt.

You knew Pearl. She was your friend. Not the closest but you were friends nonetheless. And you could see why Mark liked her, she was pretty. Albeit not the prettiest girl in class but definitely way prettier than you.

How stupid of you to believe you had a chance!

Yet, a small part of your heart hoped all of this was just a rumor.

But it wasn't. You knew that as you saw Pearl walk onto the bus after your trip with a shy smile on her face and a large bar of chocolate in her hand as her friends giggle and Mark's friends pat his back while he blushes.

You cried so hard that night. You knew you were being irrational.

He was so inconsiderate.

January 2012.

You had no idea how the rumor started about you having a crush on Sam, one of your classmates, but it was getting out of hand.

"Okay, I dare you to go outside the class and jiggle your boobs." The girl sitting in front of you said making you laugh awkwardly.

"Hell no, I'm not doing that." You say chuckling as your eyes dart to the ground.

"Yeah, your tummy will be the one jiggling anyway," she said poking your stomach as she and her friend start laughing mad high fiving each other.

You unknowingly tuck in your stomach and leaned forward to try and hide your abdomen.

"Okay, go tell Sam that you love him." She orders you.

You knew this was better than doing whatever embarrassing ideas they had in their brains.

You slowly walk up to Sam and it was only when you were right beside him that you realise all of his friends were there.

'This is so embarrassing,' you think. Confessing to a guy you don't even like just because you are too cowardly to tell people it isn't Sam you like but Mark.

"I….I..um-" You try to spit out.

"What?" He asks you looking between you and his friends.

"I like you." You said before dashing out of the classroom before anyone could process what had just happened.

When you came back a few minutes later, the whole class was hooting at the two of you.

"You shouldn't have said anything. If it was a dare, you could've skipped it. Why do you have to embarrass us both?" Sam whispered harshly looking at you with disgust as you walk past him.

You didn't like him but it still stung.

That day as you were walking out of the school campus Mark rushed over to you.

"Did you really confess to Sam?" He asked amused.

"Go away!" You mutter at him before leaving.

"Aww look at you having a crush on Sam. That's cute." He snickered before walking over to his friends including Sam.

He was so gullible.

November 2012.

The new academic year saw a big hit in your social life after Confessiongate with Sam.

The only thing you looked forward to was having Mark in your class again and if you played your cards right. Everything would go back to how it was before. The way it was intended to be.

Mark and you sharing unfunny jokes and competing over who scored higher on the latest class test.

Everything would go back to normal. Yall would have your silly yet deep conversations and you would no longer freeze if anyone in the 10 mile radius mentions his name.

The only downside? You had severely underestimated the change in the dynamics of your friendship.

Mark was no longer a 10 year old geek calling you some stupid non offensive insult. He was a teenage boy. And like all teenage boys, he did teenage boy things.

Like thinking and talking about girls all day long. Spending more time looking and grasping at potential date opportunities then spending time doing his homework.

The both of you were on opposite sides of the school hierarchy. He had his popular friends and you were a known loser. He only socialized with those that would rather be caught dead then fraternizing with your type.

The not so attractive slightly nerdy students.

But you did have a minor glow up. Maybe now the two of you could go back to being friends. You didn't expect him to like you back.

All you wanted now was him to have a normal conversation that was not "Excuse me".

You had hoped he wouldn't notice his new found popularity and pretend you never existed but he did much to your dismay.

"Aww, I scored better than you. Look!" You had boasted with a smile handing him the paper. He had only scored a point less than you but that's how things had always been. Reading each other over who did better.

"Whatever. Why do you care so much?" He sneered in annoyance before walking off.

The smile on your face dropped instantly. You knew it was stupid to hope for things to go back to the way it was but you hadn't expected such a cold response.

He had changed.

January 2013.

It was just another day. You were having a mindless chat with your friend. Being 13 year old girls, the conversation automatically ended up about boys and crushes.

"You really had a crush on Sam? He is as dumb as a bolt!" Your friend exclaimed.

You contemplated whether or not to come clean to her. You had grown quite close to her and considered her one of your more trustworthy friends.

"I never liked him. It was just a rumor." You clarified.

"Then why did you confess to him?" She asked confused.

'Whats the worse that could happen?' you thought and decided to tell her.

"I liked someone else but I was scared to tell anyone. I just kept quiet and let people assume whatever." You whispered.

"Oh my god who was it?" She asked her curiosity now through the roof.

"I'll tell you if you tell me who you have a crush on now." You struck a deal.

"Fine. He's in our class right now. He is smart. He is good-looking. And he wears the cutest glasses." She said flustered at the thought of her crush.

The only boy you knew in class that was good looking and smart was Mark. Not that you had even laid your eyes on other boys.

"Mark?" You asked as a joke secretly hoping she said no.

"Yeah." She whispered back. "Now tell me who did you actually like?"

You not your lip. "Mark."

The both of you sat in silence for a few seconds and then burst out laughing.

What a coincidence!

A few days passed and the situation that seemed funny earlier did not evoke the same feelings as you saw your friend get close to him.

Mark and you drifted apart and he became closer to your friend.

You went from having little conversation to practically being non existent to him.

It filled you with envy. Why did he give every girl a shot at the love story you so wished to have with him? Every girl except you?

He was a real heartbreaker.

February 2014.

You were finally secure in your life. You had a support system. Friends who understood you.

You opened up to them about Mark and they understood. You finally felt at peace.

You had left the chapter of his behind you. That was until Mark got himself a new girlfriend.

You never understood how they met. They were polar opposites.

Mark was academically driven. She was failing a vast majority of her classes.

Mark didn't have a single artistic bone in his body. She was an aspiring actor.

You wished you could hate her. But every single negative thought that passed your mind just seemed like envy and insecurity.

She was pretty in a conventional yet underrated way. She was so petite. She didn't talk too loud or eat like a man or laugh with her mouth open.

She was elegant and graceful and everything you were not. It was a cold and unfriendly reminder that you were not and never will be Mark's type.

He was unreachable.

October 2014.

Mark and his girlfriend were going on strong. They were a power couple in school.

And it took every single ounce of strength and sanity in you to not have a mental breakdown every time you saw the two of them together.

They were such an unlikely pair yet it made so much sense.

They made so much sense.

Seeing them and knowing you could never have something as romantic and pure as them.

She and Mark had been caught kissing in an empty classroom.

When you first heard about it, you refused to believe it. You were so incredibly jealous of her. She was living your dream.

But you couldn't help but feel bad for her. The entire ordeal ended up with her being slutshamed by classmates and teachers alike.

You felt really bad. Despite wanting to hate her you couldn't bring yourself to do so. The students would pass comments everytime she was around. The teachers were no different.

"Maybe if you focussed less on finding abandoned places to kiss boys and more in class maybe you would score more." A teacher had said in class.

"Ma'am I will respectfully ask you to apologize to her. We agree what we did was wrong. But there is no need to shame her in front of class." Mark had stood up and spoken loudly.

The entire room shut up instantly. No one had expected him to do that. Standing up for his girlfriend in a very Asian school. The teacher and he went back and forth until the teacher fed up left the class.

You always respected him. But the level of respect you had for him after seeing what he did for his girlfriend transcended any emotion you were feeling in the moment.

And it only made you fall for him more.

He was a good boyfriend.

June 2015.

Academic stress had hit an all time high. You had no time to ponder over what Mark was doing. All his friends were transferring to new schools. And you assumed he would do the same.

You were shocked to walk in class on the first day and sitting on the first seat talking to another boy excitedly.

You cover your face and speed to the back of the class.

He was in everyone of your classes. The fact made you more anxious than giddy like it did a few years ago.

The stress about your future added with the stress of your forever crush being in your presence all day long was paralyzing.

A small part of you wished he would turn around and greet you but he looked straight ahead the whole day.

He would always around.

March 2017.

The last two years of school breezed past in a snap. You had alternated between studying for medschool and yearning for Mark.

Meanwhile he kept to himself. The only time he ever approached you was when he wanted help with projects or assignments.

You knew it was wrong to help him. Especially when it was so obvious that he was taking advantage of you but you couldn't help it.

You still wanted him as much as you did 8 years ago. He will always be your dream man. You hoped that maybe helping him would make him look at you in a new light but all that was merely wishful thinking.

"I wanna be a surgeon," he told me as you hunched over the desk pretending to read our biology textbook.

"Really? I wanna be a doctor." You told him.

"Still? Psychiatrist right?" He asked.

"You remember?" You ask him surprised.

"Of course" He smiled at you.

And just like that all the emotions that you had fought and kept at bay came back all at once.

He was a real charmer.

May 2017.

It was the last day of school. You knew you would never see Mark again.

Except of school reunions maybe but who is to say either of you would even attend.

You had made up your mind. You would confess to him. You weren't gonna see him again anyways.

Although you do admit you had spent countless hours fantasizing what it would be like if you ended up going to the same college. Would he finally give you a chance? Would he go and date another perfect girl?

But the chances were slim.

The last bell had rang and students poured out of their classes.

You approached him with a nervous demeanor.

"Hey, Mark. Can we talk?" You asked him.

"Yeah. What's up?" He asked.

You open your mouth to profess your undying love for him but before you could utter a single world you hear your teacher calling for the both of you.

"You both did so well in your finals. Y/N, I need to talk to you about some stuff. Can you stay back?" She looked at you.

"Yes, of course." You answer looking at Mark.

"You can leave now, Mark." She told him and dragged you away.

You wanted to run back and tell him "I love you. I've loved you since we were 10." But you just let yourself be dragged away by your teacher.

Maybe it was a sign from the universe.

He was never yours.

July 2017.

It was graduation.

You didn't think Mark would be here. You heard from a mutual friend that he got into his dream college.

You were happy for him really.

But standing at the gates of your school you saw him again. Wearing the same goofy smile as always surrounded by people.

You walk upto him. "Hey, guys. Finally done with this hellhole."

They all laugh as a wave of nostalgia hits them. Reminiscing the time spent.

"I heard you got into your dream college. Congratulations!" I wish Mark.

"Yeah. What about you?" He asked seeming genuinely curious.

"I'm gonna take a year off for mental health. I don't know if I wanna pursue medicine anymore. I don't have the brains for it." You laugh.

"Are you kidding? You're like the smartest person I know! Don't give up. For my sake?" He said in a pleading voice.

"For your sake? And who are you?" You laugh at him.

"Only like your bestest friend ever, Miss. VIP." He said his eyes crinkling as his smile got bigger.

"You remember that? Oh my god we were so lame." You lean into him as he lets out a laugh agreeing you.

And just like that the two of you were 10 again. And you fell in love with him and everything he did for a millionth time.

"You said we needed to talk that day. What was it about?" He asked out of nowhere.

You were tempted to tell him everything.

How you've been in love with him for ages.

How he made you feel. Makes you feel.

A thousand words on the tip of your tongue. You looked deep in his eye hoping to see a fraction of the things you felt for him. But all you could see was the reflection of a young girl hopelessly in love with a boy who would never see her the same way.

"Nothing. Just wanted to ask about where you were applying for college." You lied effortlessly.

The two of you stood together as the ceremony started.

He was just a fantasy.

August 2018.

Its been a year since you saw Mark.

He got busy with college and you understood.

Its not like you were that close anyways.

You would occasionally check his Instagram page. He had a new girlfriend you saw. It didn't fill you with envy. You were happy for him. It was a bittersweet happiness.

You had often wondered whether you had truly loved him.

Did you love Mark Lee as a person or the person you had made him up to be in your head? Was he really your soulmate or just a chapter in your book that you read to your children years from now?

Was it really love? Or was it childhood infatuation?

"Heard you got into medschool. Congratulations future Dr. Y/N!" He texted.

And just like that you fell for him again.

Afterall, he was your first love.

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yara0546 · 11 days ago

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Second Glance | Lee Taeyong

Pairing: Lee taeyong x female!reader

word count: 2.2k word.

Genre: fluff، relationship، angst, break up.

Note: English is not my first language, so I apologize if there are any grammatical errors, because I sometimes use a translator in some sentences.

Masterlist

The dim lights of the art gallery cast long shadows over the floor, painting the space with an ethereal glow. You hadn’t planned on coming tonight; the last thing you wanted was to run into someone you’d been trying to forget. But when your best friend dragged you along, insisting the exhibit was a must see, you found yourself here standing in front of a painting, lost in thought.

“Still a fan of abstract art, I see.”

The voice behind you made your heart stop. You hadn’t heard it in months, but it was unmistakable. Low, smooth, and laced with a familiarity that tugged at your chest.

Turning slowly, your breath hitched. There he was—Lee Taeyong. Dressed in a tailored black blazer and a simple white shirt, his silver hair catching the light, he looked effortlessly stunning. But it was his eyes that caught you off guard. They held a mix of surprise and something deeper something you didn’t want to name.

“Taeyong,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

His lips curved into a small smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “It’s been a while.”

You nodded, gripping the strap of your bag to keep your hands steady. “Yeah. It has.”

For a moment, the silence between you was deafening, broken only by the soft murmur of other guests around the gallery.

“Are you.... how have you been?” he asked, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“I’ve been… okay,” you replied cautiously. “And you?”

“Same.” He paused, glancing at the painting you’d been staring at. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Neither did I.”

The air between you was thick, charged with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. The breakup had been mutual—or at least that’s what you both told yourselves at the time. Careers, schedules, and misunderstandings had gotten in the way. But now, standing so close to him again, all those reasons seemed distant and insignificant.

“Do you ever think about it?” he asked suddenly, his voice softer now.

“About what?”

“Us.”

Your throat tightened. You had thought about it too often, in fact. Late nights when the world was quiet, you’d replayed memories of his laughter, the way he’d hold you when you were upset, and the countless little moments that made your heart ache.

“Taeyong…” you began, but he cut you off.

“I know,” he said, taking a step closer. “I know it’s complicated, and I know I probably don’t have the right to ask. But seeing you again it’s like everything I tried to bury came rushing back.”

You swallowed hard, your eyes meeting his. “It wasn’t easy for me either,” you admitted.

His expression softened, and for the first time that evening, you saw the vulnerability he rarely showed anyone. “I never stopped caring about you, you know. Even when we said goodbye, a part of me… it always hoped we’d find our way back to each other.”

The words hung in the air, heavy with meaning. You didn’t know what to say. A part of you wanted to walk away, to protect yourself from the possibility of reopening old wounds. But another part a bigger part wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, this was your second chance.

“Taeyong,” you began, your voice trembling slightly. “I don’t know if we can go back to what we were. But…”

“But?” he prompted, his eyes searching yours.

“But maybe we can start over,” you said finally. “See where it takes us.”

His face broke into a genuine smile, the kind that made your heart skip a beat. “I’d like that,” he said softly.

For the rest of the evening, you wandered through the gallery together, talking about everything and nothing. It wasn’t the same as before, but it didn’t have to be. This was something new, something fragile yet hopeful. And as the night wore on, you realized that sometimes, love deserves a second chance.

The two of you wandered through the gallery in a rhythm that felt oddly familiar, like you had fallen back into sync without realizing it. Conversations began to flow more easily, no longer hindered by the initial tension.

“You’re still obsessed with neutral tones, huh?” Taeyong teased, pointing at your all beige outfit.

You raised an eyebrow. “And you’re still doing the monochrome thing, I see. Black and white forever, huh?”

He laughed, the sound soft but warm. “Some things never change.”

As the two of you stopped in front of a sculpture, you noticed him stealing glances at you. His expression wasn’t one of regret or sadness but of quiet admiration, as if he were seeing you for the first time all over again.

“Why did you come tonight?” you asked, turning to meet his gaze.

He hesitated, the playful air dissipating. “The artist is an old friend. But honestly… I almost didn’t come.”

“Why not?”

“Because I didn’t want to face the possibility of running into you,” he admitted, his voice barely audible. “And now I feel like an idiot for thinking that way.”

Your heart clenched. “Why?”

“Because seeing you here, talking to you like this… I realized I didn’t come to terms with anything. I just tried to push it all away.” He looked down, his fingers nervously playing with the ring on his hand. “But running into you feels like the universe is giving me a wake-up call. Like it’s telling me not to mess up again.”

You didn’t know what to say. His honesty caught you off guard, leaving you teetering between old fears and new hope.

“Taeyong,” you began, choosing your words carefully, “we broke up for a reason. There were things we couldn’t figure out, and pretending those problems aren’t still there won’t fix anything.”

He nodded, looking at you earnestly. “I know. And I don’t want to pretend everything’s fine. I want to do things right this time. But that’s only if… if you’re willing to try.”

The vulnerability in his voice was disarming. You saw a different side of him tonight one that wasn’t hiding behind the walls he’d so carefully constructed.

“Trying means talking,” you said softly. “Really talking. About what went wrong and what needs to change. It means putting in the work.”

“I’m willing,” he said firmly. “Whatever it takes.”

You studied him for a moment, searching his face for any trace of hesitation. But all you saw was sincerity and hope.

“I don’t know where this will lead,” you said cautiously. “But… I’m willing to take it one step at a time.”

A smile broke across his face, lighting up his features in a way that made your chest tighten. “One step at a time,” he echoed.

As the night went on, the tension between you gave way to a tentative ease. You found yourself laughing at his jokes, teasing him about his unrelenting perfectionism, and even reminiscing about some of your old memories together. It wasn’t perfect, but it felt real like the start of something new.

When the gallery began to empty out, the two of you walked toward the exit, the cool night air brushing against your skin. Taeyong hesitated before speaking.

“Can I walk you home?” he asked, his tone careful, as though he were afraid of overstepping.

You hesitated for a moment, then nodded. “I’d like that.”

The streets were quiet as you walked side by side, the city lights casting a soft glow over everything. Taeyong kept his hands in his pockets, his posture slightly stiff, as though he was holding himself back.

“Do you remember the first time we walked like this?” he asked suddenly.

You smiled, the memory coming back vividly. “You mean when you insisted on carrying my art supplies after that class and tripped over the sidewalk?”

He groaned, rubbing the back of his neck. “I was trying to be chivalrous, and it completely backfired.”

“And I laughed so hard I almost dropped my sketchbook,” you added, grinning.

“Hey, at least I made an impression,” he said, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

As the laughter faded, a comfortable silence settled between you. It wasn’t the kind of silence that begged to be filled but the kind that felt natural, even peaceful.

When you reached your building, you stopped at the entrance, turning to face him. For a moment, neither of you spoke, the weight of the night hanging in the air.

“Thank you for walking me home,” you said softly.

“Thank you for letting me,” he replied, his voice equally quiet.

There was a pause, and then he took a small step closer. “Can I see you again?”

Your heart skipped a beat, but this time, it wasn’t out of fear or hesitation. “Yes,” you said, a small smile playing on your lips. “I think I’d like that.”

His smile was soft and genuine, a flicker of relief crossing his face. “Goodnight,” he said, stepping back reluctantly.

“Goodnight, Taeyong.”

As you watched him walk away, a strange sense of calm settled over you. Maybe this wasn’t the perfect ending or even a clear beginning. But it was a chance—a second glance at something you thought was lost. And for now, that was enough.

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binnie-bitch · 8 months ago

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My Prayer And My Virtue - NCT/Enhypen Fanfiction

(Posted on AO3)

Pairing: Jeong Jaehyun/Jake Sim

Tags: Slow Burn, Canon Compliant, Smut, Coming Out, Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending

Word Count: 79k

Summary:

Their legs were untied, but Jake stayed close. Jaehyun slipped his arm around Jake's shoulders to get him even closer, and then leaned in, breathing in cinnamon and sweat. "I don't think we need to worry about most of the teams," he whispered. Jake tensed. He whipped his head around so quickly, Jaehyun had to pull away to avoid collision. Big eyes got bigger and Jake bowed as much as he could with Jaehyun still standing close. "I'm sorry!" "Did I startle you?" "No, I…" Jake smiled bashfully.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jaehyun and Jake get paired for a variety show. They both find themselves enjoying their time together a little too much until the elephant in the room becomes too big to ignore. But figuring out you're not straight isn't as easy as some people like to believe, and Jaehyun and Jake are very new to this.

A/N: It's been a while since I finished posting this fic on AO3 and I debated if I should post it here. In a compromise I will post the link to the fic at least! Please consider reading <3

READ ON AO3

#nct fanfiction #enhypen fanfiction #nct 127 fanfiction #jeong jaehyun #jake sim #enhypen jake #nct jaehyun #ao3 #fanfiction

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primehyuck · 1 year ago

Text

MOVES

aka good things take time (the happy ending version)

word count: 11.3k

i first started writing this because i’ve been listening to the song Moves by Suki Waterhouse on repeat, but it became much more than that

contents: long time best friend!haechan, slice of life, pining and yearning, chronological time jumps (mostly college and young adulthood), other members mentioned (Mark and Jeno!roommates), kissing, fluff, wet dreams, a good example of two people who seriously need to communicate, face sitting, morning sex, lots of pet names

“Do you think we’ll be friends for a long time?” Haechan’s soft voice distracts your attempt to focus on a blade of the blurry ceiling fan, unable to keep you cool despite it spinning so fast you think it might fly away.

“How do you mean?” the bed squeaks when Haechan sits up to lean over you.

“Growing up, I feel like my parents didn’t have many friends aside from each other. My mom told me that it’s because when you get older your priorities change and you realize who adds value to your life, and that’s who you decide to keep.” His eyes are glowing with sincerity, body blocking the flow of air from touching you at all “so when we’re older, and married with kids and other priorities, and we maybe live in different cities, do you think we’ll still be friends?”

You stare at him for a moment before shoving his face out of the way of the fans air stream.

“Definitely,” your confidence soothes him enough that he lays back down “if I ever muster up the creativity to come up with a reason to stop being your friend, you have to swear you’ll tell me how stupid I’m being, swear to me.” you smack his chest before he can even answer.

“I swear!” He smiles to himself, staring up at the ceiling with you, rubbing his hand over the warm spot where your hand made contact, melting into the mattress.

———

Growing up people always joked that Haechan and you would fall in love, that it was inevitable, practical even. Because, if you fall in love with your best friend you’ve already conquered one of the highest mountains - finding someone that you like, and who likes you back.

You had both seen the other in a relationship, an inevitability when you’ve been friends with someone since puberty. He’d cheered you on when you had your first kiss during a game of spin the bottle in high school, forced you to come out on double dates with him and a friend of his you didn’t even like just so he could take someone else out, and freshman year of college he’d even introduced you to the person you'd lost your virginity to.

The only time he cockblocked you was when you tried to get to know any of his friends more than platonically, so eventually you gave up and settled for real friendship with all of them.

“Trust me, you don’t want to touch him with a six foot pole.” He’d said freshman year when you had mentioned your attraction to his roommate, Mark.

“He seems so nice, though.” you pouted

“He is nice, but that doesn’t mean you want to be with him.”

“How would you know what I want?” you scoffed, and he looked at you like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Has the wind beneath my wings ever led you into the wrong arms?” He was highly animated, offended that you would question his judgment.

By the start of sophomore year it was obvious to everyone else that you were strictly off limits. All of his friends had decided unanimously that even if you did attempt anything with them they had no choice but to shut you down. The cold stare Haechan unknowingly serves them from across the room whenever they got too close was enough to keep them away. None of the boys ever minded the boundaries with you, there always was an ease in your friendship since they all knew it could never go further, but that didn’t mean they never thought about the possibility.

One night, at the end of junior year, Haechan is nowhere to be found at his own party and you graciously accept Jeno’s invitation upstairs when you complain of a headache, “we can play Mario Kart, and it won’t be all competitive like when Haechan plays with us.”

It starts like normal, and you're having fun when you realize that your tipsy brain can’t focus on the screen and the conversation simultaneously, opting for the latter as you relax into Jeno’s pillows. You don’t even notice him inching closer to you until his nose touches yours, tugging at a strand of your hair. This is the first time any of Haechan’s friends have shown interest in you, you’d never even been on the receiving end of a flirtatious stare from across the beer pong table, so you take the reins.

Kissing Jeno feels a little bit like winning, like you’ve finally made it past the invisible forcefield Haechan had put up around his friends. The kiss is lazy and hot, Jeno props himself up on one elbow and presses your back into the mattress with his chest. Your eager fingers run beneath his shirt, his abs tightening when you trail them over his sides. Your spine tingles when he groans into your mouth, the hand on your cheek moving to grip your knee and hike your leg over his hip. His hand holds strong around your thigh, and you sigh when he grinds into you.

Jeno pulls away too soon, stopping your hands reaching for the hem of his shirt with a pained sigh as he drops your leg to roll onto his back, flinging an arm over his eyes.

“Fuck, I should not be doing this with you.”

“Why, you don’t want to?” You want to curl into yourself, sitting up to stare down at his shaking head.

“No, definitely not that.” he pulls his arm away to meet your eyes, the alcohol in his veins making him brave enough to admit “Haechan would be pissed.”

“Haechan?” you question “did he say something to you?” Jeno groans, sitting up and hooking his elbows around his knees, staring at the mattress between his legs.

“No, no. He’s never actually said anything,” he knows he’s revealing too much, but he also knows he’s gone too far to stop “we just know he would never want us to cross that line with you.”

“We?” you can feel embarrassment bubbling in your chest at the idea of all of your friends talking about this.

“Yeah, you know, all the guys. We figured you were just off limits, I don’t know.” he grimaces, looking up at you with apologetic eyes when you don’t respond. You huff and climb off the bed, feeling rejected in more ways than one.

You’d crossed a boundary tonight, but Jeno was still a close friend, someone you’d spent a lot of time with since he met Haechan freshman year. He still knows you, so he grabs your wrist before you can leave, shifting to sit on the edge of the bed so he can stand you between his legs.

“I’m sorry, don’t be mad.” He envelops your hands in his and brings them to his chest.

“I’m not mad,” you mumble, avoiding his apologetic gaze “I’m embarrassed that all of my friends agreed not to touch me.”

“Did you really think not a single one of us was ever interested in you?” you shrug and he squeezes your hands tighter, heart tugging in his chest.

“When people don’t act interested, that’s usually a safe assumption.” you pout and Jeno’s laugh buzzes through your linked fingers "I gave up on all of you halfway through freshman year."

“Well, some of us are better actors than I remember.”

He has you laughing by the time you leave his room, sealing the night with one more self indulgent kiss and a pinky swear to never tell Haechan about what happened.

———

Halfway through the first semester of senior year Haechan bangs angrily on his roommates door before swinging it open and Jeno is genuinely shocked that it's taken this long for the gossip to hit his ears. The rest of the boys had clocked Jeno the next morning for being ‘too happy’ and he had to make them all swear not to tell, wanting to protect your pride and his own friendship with Haechan.

"You slut!" Haechan points an accusatory finger in Jeno's direction, dragging his feet slowly toward him until he's so close Jeno has to bat his hand out of his face.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh, you know exactly what I'm talking about." Haechan's voice is low and angry, something new and unpleasant sparking in his gut at the idea of Jeno kissing you, touching you.

"No, I don't." Jeno can’t help but antagonize. Pleased with the perfect opportunity to trick Haechan into saying out loud what everyone else seems to have known for years.

"You kissed my best friend!" He shrieks, tossing his hands up in the air dramatically.

"So what, she's not allowed to kiss people?" Haechan squints his eyes at Jeno’s response, scrunching his nose in annoyance “how did you even find out?”

"She can kiss whoever she wants, it's all of you that aren't allowed to kiss her." Haechan waves his hand wildly toward the bedroom door, alluding to the large group of boys living in the house “you know Mark can’t keep a secret, he’s been bursting at the seams for months. All I had to do was ask.”

"It happened forever ago dude, why are you so pissed? You've never even given us a chance to get close to her in that way, maybe one of us could really like her." Jeno reasons, tugging at Haechan's strings, watching the gears in his brain turn as he tries to come up with a real argument.

"She has a boyfriend," Haechan finally says with a frown at the thought of the guy he’d only recently met, he doesn’t like him at all. From his stupid hair to the shoes he wears, there’s not a thing about your new boyfriend that Haechan thinks is good enough for you. He collapses into the gaming chair across from where Jeno is relaxed on the couch, not having moved at all since Haechan stormed in "plus, I think any of you would know by now, you've all known her for four years."

"I think, that it can take a lot longer than four years to realize how much you like someone." Jeno bites, "how long have you known her?"

"Since middle school." He picks at the hole in the knee of his black jeans, realizing what Jeno is alluding to, defensive exterior quickly crumbling.

"Right, I think that if you're blind enough then it can take ten years to realize how much you like someone."

"Well, maybe ten years is too long and that person missed their chance." Haechan turns his head to stare out the window, anxiously spinning the chair side to side.

"You know I'm talking about you, right?"

"God, yes, I know you're talking about me." Haechan glares at his friend, fidgeting stopping abruptly "and I know I've been a complete idiot about it, but like I said, I’m out of time."

———

Haechan can’t stop his free hand from clenching and unclenching as you sob into your pillow, his less angry hand rubbing over your back.

“He told me he saw us moving in together after graduation,” your voice shakes “how do you look someone in the eyes and say shit like that and then sleep with someone else?”

“I don’t know,” Haechan replies earnestly, feeling as helpful as flip flops in the snow from where he sits on the edge of your mattress “I’m so sorry.”

He takes your silence as an invitation, lying on his stomach, face turned toward you, fingers still drawing soothing circles over your shoulder blades. He waits patiently for you to calm down, unease swarming his stomach knowing that even after years of friendship he can’t truly comfort you in this moment.

“I’m so embarrassed.” you sniffle, smearing your face over your pillow before turning to look at him. He holds his breath, waiting for you to collect yourself enough to explain.

“I’m so gullible, he even told me he’s cheated in the past and for whatever reason I believed that he’d treat me differently, that he’d love me enough.” Haechan has to count to five in his head to stay calm before he speaks.

“You have no reason to be embarrassed. The most natural thing you can do is believe someone when they say they love you.” He murmurs, turning onto his side so he can pull you into a hug. When you curl into his body to bury your face in his chest he can only pray you can’t hear his heart pound against his ribs.

“He’s an idiot, and he didn’t deserve any of the love you gave him. I promise, you’re so much better off.”

Haechan hates the piece of himself that’s relieved your relationship has ended. The same piece that hated your ex the minute he met him, that feels heavy in your absence whenever you’re busy with anyone who isn’t him. The piece that crosses it’s fingers whenever you get this close in hopes that you’ll be the first one to cross the line, to finally do what he’s thought about doing for the last few months since he realized exactly how he felt about you.

“Thank you,” you mumble into his tear dampened shirt, lifting your leg over his to cuddle in even closer “thanks for always being my friend, even when I do dumb shit, like let boys be mean to me.”

He nuzzles his nose into your scalp, eyes fluttering shut at the smell of your shampoo “Thanks for letting me. Besides, even Beyoncé got cheated on, so you clearly aren’t that dumb.” the crowd in his brain cheers when you giggle into his chest.

“You’re so annoying.” He holds you even tighter.

———

“I can’t believe it,” your jaw drops and Haechan whips his head up nervously to look at you from across the couch

“What happened?”

“I got it, I got the job!” you shove his feet off your lap to jump up excitedly, bouncing on your toes as you read the email out loud. Haechan’s ears are ringing so loud he barely catches the first half, trying to shake off the dazed look he’s sure appears on his face.

“We were extremely impressed with your resume and even more so with the impression you left on the board during your interview, blah blah blah, excited to offer you this position, blah blah blah, and a relocation bonus to join us in in our new office!” the pitch of your voice rises a few octaves as you finish reading.

Haechan stares at you from his spot on the couch, eyes wide with shock that you’re too excited to notice, skimming your screen as you re-read the details in your offer letter.

His entire body is buzzing, torn between feeling excited at your accomplishment and sorry for himself.

He had a plan, a really good one, he thought. After your breakup you’d made it painfully clear that you wanted to be single for a while, and he knew if he could just be patient, it would all be worth it. So Haechan decided to bottle his feelings up, sitting patiently by your side where he had been for so many years, waiting for you to heal and hoping that when you were finally ready to start dating again he’d have mustered up the courage to make the first move.

“Lee Donghyuck, are you even listening to me!?” you drop your phone to pull him up off the couch, bouncing up and down with your fingers intertwined “I’m moving to my dream city, to start my dream job.” you reiterate and he snaps out of it, sweeping the imaginary shards of glass that his plan had been made out of under the rug and pulling you into a hug.

“That’s amazing, I’m so proud of you.”

“Your enthusiasm is overwhelming.” You deadpan, but squeeze him back just as tight.

“I’m sorry, I’m going to miss you is all.” He admits, "I'd follow you if my job didn't keep me here."

“I’ll make sure you don’t miss me too much, don’t worry.” you plant your cheek on his chest, surprised at the relief you feel in hearing him say it first.

———

This feeling was still a little unfamiliar, nerves. Haechan had never made you nervous growing up; excited, annoyed, passionate maybe, but never nervous.

The nerves began last summer, when he’d come out to visit you for the first time to celebrate his birthday. It was the longest you’d gone without seeing each other since you’d met, almost ten full months and the anticipation was palpable.

When he steps through the airport doors you think that it’s the relief of finally being near him again that knocks the wind out of you. Running into his open arms and being squeezed so tightly in them that you tap his shoulder to let you breathe. Ruffling his hair when he steps back and ignoring the fact that he had grown so much since you’d seen him last.

But as the night goes on, the slight changes to the person you have memorized become glaringly obvious. The way his cheeks have lost some of their cushion, revealing a sharp jaw and pointed cheekbones. The natural wave in his once unruly hair now falling perfectly over his brow bone, he had dyed it a little darker which made his tan skin glow even in dim lighting. Even his smell seemed to draw you into a trance, a much more expensive version of the Haechan you know.

“You know, that group of girls has been staring over at you since we walked in.” You raise your eyebrows playfully, pointing your glass toward the pretty gaggle that keeps walking past the booth you and Haechan occupy.

He doesn’t break eye contact with you before shrugging, “I didn’t come here to see them, I came to see you.” he smiles, punctuating his thought by reaching over the table and tapping your nose.

“I know, I know,” you laugh, batting him away “It never hurts to know when people are staring, though”

His face is unreadable as he rests his arm lazily up over the bench of the booth, body sinking into the seat while he lifts his glass to swirl his drink, biting the words that have been resting on the tip of his tongue the entire trip, and at the end of every phone call since you started your new job.

“How are you, seriously.” You push. In the time since you moved he’d started and ended a relationship with a girl that you’d never met. Your new job kept you so busy that you hadn’t even learned about the breakup until a week later, when you finally had the time to call him back. The guilt of your absence weighs you down, resenting your inability to be there for him the way he had been for you in the past.

“I’m over it, seriously.” You know he’s telling the truth, but it’s in your nature to pry.

“You never really talked about, why, you know.”

“Do I have to?”

“No, I’m sorry, I just feel so behind on your life.” You sigh and push your empty glass to the side, swirling your finger in the ring of cold water it leaves behind.

“It’s okay, really. You’ve been busy, I understand.” He reaches across the table to stop your anxious fingers “I didn’t love her the way I knew I should, that’s all. It’s a good thing that it ended, and I’m happy that it did.”

“That’s all that matters, then.” and he’s grateful that you drop the subject.

You eventually get back to your apartment, both giggly and flush from the alcohol still fogging your brain despite the long walk you'd hoped would lessen it. Haechan holds your hand the whole way back, even when he stops suddenly to pet a dog, dragging you down to the ground with him. He can’t help himself, grateful that at this point you'd touched one another in every way other than what he dreams about most, and you seem oblivious to his need to be so close to you.

As you get ready for bed he lets himself watch you undress facing the wall away from him, unaware of his gaze burning into your backside and the way his fingers tingle at the thought of pulling at the meat of your hips. He scolds his heart for thudding so loud when you squeeze your eyes into a smile at his reflection standing next to yours at the sink while you brush your teeth, the domestication of your friendship that he used to appreciate now suffocating him.

You put on a movie and invite him to rest his head on the pillow in your lap, wishing he could bury his nose into the skin of your thighs beneath it. Halfway through the movie he has to sit up to hide the way his cock is hardening at the feeling of your nails combing through his hair and down his shoulder, occasionally thrumming over his chest. He pulls a blanket off the back of the couch and tosses it over his legs as casually as possible, pulling you into his side by your shoulder, the other arm stretched across the back of the couch.

"Are you cold for the first time in your life?" Haechan never wants to use a blanket, but you’re grateful for the position giving you access to bury your face into his chest, gripping his shirt.

"No, just want to be warmer." he presses a blushing cheek onto the top of your head, trying to think of anything except the way your hair smells, or the feeling of the side of your breast brushing his wrist through your shirt. Haechan feels eighteen again and like he's discovering the connection between romantic and sexual feelings for the first time in his life. He tries to match his breathing to yours, holding his breath whenever you shift in his hold and reconnecting his stomach with your back as quickly as possible. The temptation to pour his heart out is overwhelming, but when he feels your body completely relax into his and your breathing slow down, the words become trapped in his throat, so he lets you sleep.

Haechan had never experienced a shorter 48 hours than that weekend he spent following you around the city you now call home.

You’re shining in your new space, and he happily trails behind you to all the places you’ve discovered in the almost year since you moved. His stomach does somersaults whenever you point something out that reminds you of him.

“I’ve been waiting to come here until you could come with me!” you're so excited to take him to the video game themed coffee shop that your co-workers had recommended “I thought about coming to see if it was even worth it, but I only want to play these kinds of games with you anyway.”

Sometimes he can forget about his feelings for you, when things are just as they always have been. You talk with and touch him the same, laugh at his jokes the same. He thinks that if he were to ever say out loud what he’s been feeling, that the two of you would still be the same but with a little More, ‘you guys’ but on steroids. So when everything is normal he can pretend like it‘a not. He can act like the More is there when you hold his hand to drag him around to the different machines, play games he wants to play even if you don’t want to, you even wipe ice cream off of his chin when his cone starts to melt because he’s talking too much to eat and he wonders why it took him so long to see it this way, and if you could too.

He keeps thinking the moment will come, when he’ll know spilling his guts to you is the right thing to do. But between you gushing over how much you love your new life and your willingness to point out every girl who has blinked at him this weekend, he completely loses the steam he’d gained during his flight, regardless of how his imagination runs wild with the More.

He curses himself the entire weekend for his lack of bravery, hoping that keeping his feelings in is the right decision. After his recent relationship crashed and burned because of his feelings for you he thought he had no choice but to come clean. But watching you, being with you in your new life makes him realize that his role in it hasn’t changed even if his feelings for you have.

The lump in his throat as he stands outside the departure doors is more than just sadness at the thought of leaving you, it’s the realization that he has to let the romantic idea of you go.

“How come you never cry when we have to leave each other,” you hiccup into his chest, and he coos your name lovingly.

“Don’t worry, you know I save my tears for the plane to make everyone in my row uncomfortable.” He knows that you hate that he’s making you laugh at a time like this, pulling away so you can swat his chest and he raises his hands in surrender.

“When will we be able to see each other again?”

“As soon as possible.” He nods reassuringly, wiping your tears with his thumb, heart pounding as he stares into your watering eyes “hey, you’re my best friend in the world, you annoy me every day, and I love you.”

“Whatever, I love you too.” you laugh, but his heart speeds up at the words that you’ve said to him thousands of times. You sweep your arms around him one last time before pushing him toward the airport doors “you better go, if you miss your flight I can’t guarantee I’ll let you leave at all.”

“Don’t tempt me.” He walks backwards slowly, staring at you with a ‘kicked puppy’ kind of face he mastered years ago and you wave enthusiastically, blowing loud kisses into the air that he catches and clutches to his heart.

“This is it,” he thinks, “this has to be it.”

———

Haechan is dreaming about you. He has been nightly ever since he got back from his birthday weekend. He’s grateful the dreams have variety, since some of them overwhelm him to the point of waking up and not being able to fall back asleep.

Sometimes, you’re young again and whenever anyone says “You know, it’s just a matter of time until one of you has a crush on the other.” you both theatrically gag, laughing at each other as if it were the most insane idea in the world. Or, you're sitting on his childhood couch watching your guys' favorite movie for the hundredth weekend in a row, vocalizing the parts of the two main characters and recreating all the best scenes.

Sometimes you’re at his apartment just hanging out together, which are dreams that feel so real he almost expects to see you in his kitchen when he wakes up. Most of these dreams spark a deja vu laced flame in his gut so deep he finds himself confusing them with memories. The ache of missing you wakes him up before his alarm some mornings, and he finds himself face timing you once he knows you're awake just to watch you make coffee and wash your face.

But sometimes, he has dreams that make him feel so ashamed he can barely text you back in the morning. Dreams where he reaches to touch you and you let him, where you tug at his hair and moan his name while he does all the things that he can only do to you in his sleep. He hates to say that these are his favorite, but it's the one dream he knows he'll never actually achieve and he goes to bed every night praying for them.

That’s the kind of dream he’s having when his phone buzzes him awake. He answers without looking because there are only a handful of people who can reach him when he’s on ‘do not disturb’, and you’re one of them. He hums a sleepy greeting into his phone, putting it on speaker next to his pillow and nearly drifting right back into the dream and between your thighs.

“Donghyuck” his eyes shoot open at the sound of your voice “did i wake you up?”

He can practically hear the pout in your voice, squinting at the time on his phone, “Yes, it’s three in the morning,” he stares down to where he’s half hard, running an embarrassed hand over his face even though there’s no possible way for you to know “are you okay?”

“No, well technically yes but I miss you which means things could be better.” you slur your words and Haechan smiles, somehow he's never annoyed that you call him pretty much every time you drink. He thinks it's because he's familiar with this version of you, though he definitely hasn't seen it often since college graduation. This version of you loves him hard, and is never afraid to say it.

"I miss you too," he takes a beat before adding "I was dreaming about you just now."

You gasp excitedly "Really! What were we doing." He smirks at the thought of telling you that you had been sitting on his face, hand reaching back for his cock while he guides your cunt over his tongue until you were shaking above him.

"Just, hanging out." he shrugs. It's his second time this week alone dreaming of your clit bumping his nose, and the thought makes his mouth water.

"I don't believe you." You say accusingly "that's way too boring for a mind like yours to dream up."

"What exactly is my mind like?" He yawns, throwing his forearm over his eyes.

"Oh, you know," you hum "your mind is a galaxy, with at least a billion planets and twice as many stars. I wish I could fly into your head and explore it, but NASA doesn't have the funds."

Haechan holds his breath at your compliment, the smile on his face so wide he can hear it in his own voice "That sounds like an episode of Magic School Bus."

"Your brain is definitely cooler than some cartoon, it's pretty much my favorite place on Earth."

"How would you know, you've never actually been inside?" He shakes his head, teasing you gently. Hearing words like these come out of your mouth breaks his heart and glues it back together at the same time.

"Are you saying you never think about me?" you ask him, not an ounce of sarcasm in your voice.

"I think about you all the time, I promise, all the planets in my brain are shaped like you." You hum, pleased with his response. He shuts his eyes and waits for your answer.

"Yeah, all the planets in mine are shaped like you, too." you pause for a second and add "plus all the stars, I win, I think about you more."

———

This time when Haechan comes to visit you, you know the nerves are more than just excitement at seeing your best friend. It’s a feeling that is nestled so deep in your stomach it makes you a little nauseous. You haven't seen him since you went home for the holidays and he only has one night in the city. You find yourself grueling over your reflection in the mirror, not used to being self conscious in front of him. You’re only going out for happy hour, but you put yourself together to last all night.

When Haechan finally arrives he whistles lowly, making you blush when he pulls out of your hug and requests a spin.

“I appreciate that you got so dressed up for me.” He teases, hoping you don’t catch his eyes sweeping over your legs, wanting to commit you in this dress to memory.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you roll your eyes as if you hadn’t spent the last two hours making sure you looked as perfect as possible. Hoping he doesn’t see the pile of clothes shoved into your closet from all the failed attempts.

“Never,” he grabs your purse off of the counter and opens the door, sweeping his arm out in front of him dramatically “after you. There are some strangers outside who are waiting to catch a glimpse of you, they just don’t know it yet.”

“You are so dramatic.” You lock the door behind you, using the moment facing away from him to collect yourself. Lately you catch yourself wondering if he'd always been so flirtatious, or if you're just forcing meaning behind his words because of how badly you want him to be.

“What, a guy can’t compliment his best friend?”

You smile widely at him and grab your bag out of his grasp, popping your key inside and walking toward the entrance of your building. Praying your fingers stop shaking when you finally get a drink in you. Haechan throws his arm around your shoulders while you walk down the street to your favorite cocktail bar and you're grateful for his usual chatter, talking to you about work and his slow climb up the ladder.

“They put me in a hotel this time, so you don’t have to worry about making me breakfast in the morning.” He smiles at you, sipping his drink gingerly.

“You know I never cook you breakfast.” He feels so far away across the table and you wish that you were sitting next to him instead, shoulders cold without the weight of his arm around them. It feels so good to have him touch you, to feel like you're his. There's a small part of you that feels guilty for using his knack for physical affection to your advantage, he has no idea what the heat of his skin on yours does.

“I know, but all the meetings are in the hotel anyway so it’s easier this time to just stay there.”

You try not to let yourself visibly deflate at the news, wanting to keep him for yourself the whole time he’s in town. His knee presses against yours under the table and you focus all your energy into acting the way you would have before, but you can’t focus on anything else and cross your legs to pull away from him as casually as possible. As badly as you want to touch him, sometimes you can’t.

“What time do you have to be up?”

He groans, leaning back enough that his knee now slides against your shin, “too early,” and glances down at his now empty glass, motioning to the bartender for another “which means you need to drink faster, so I can stop at a reasonable hour.”

You smile, downing the rest of your drink in one gulp, when his foot taps against yours you know it's going to be a long night.

The end of the night finds you together on your couch with a shared bottle of wine sitting empty on the coffee table, his early meetings temporarily forgotten. You and Haechan have been in this position plenty of times, drunk, slap happy and overly touchy in a way that you had always been comfortable being with one another. The difference now is you, this version of you who wants your best friend in an entirely different way.

Every time he pulls you closer you feel electricity shoot straight to your heart so intensely that you have to duck out of his grasp. You don’t know what to do with the feelings that have been growing gradually from your toes up, now practically sprouting out of your scalp with a neon sign blinking “I’m in love with you” over and over.

“Why do you keep doing that?” Haechan whines when you all but flinch away from his hand reaching for his phone near your arm. He’d been aware of it all night, the space you left between the two of you while you walked back from the bar, your sudden inability to maintain the eye contact that he craved. The complete lack of physical touch makes him feel dejected.

“Doing what?” You give him a panicked look, practically sober at the thought of being found out, of what it would feel like to be rejected by him.

“You’re not letting me touch you,” he frowns, and the alcohol buzzes through your veins again “not that you need to let me, but you only avoid it like this when you’re upset. Did I do something?” he pouts, tired eyes low when he flops his head onto his bicep resting on the back of the couch. You forget to breathe for a second when he looks up at you under dark lashes.

“I’m not upset. I wasn’t doing it on purpose.” you’re lying through your teeth, but scoot an inch closer to him to make your point. He doesn’t look convinced, and if you’d had less to drink you may have noticed the mischievous glint in his eye before he grabs you by your arm, knocking you off balance and into his chest.

“See,” he sighs happily, wrapping his arms around your body and you can feel his chest buzz when he hums, cheek pressed to the top of your head. You have no choice but to ungracefully shift your lower body closer to him, making yourself a sponge and soaking in his familiar touch “isn’t that better?”

You nod, “Yes, it is better.” and you really wish he didn’t know you so well, that even in his fifth hour of being drunk he can read your mind. He pulls your ear off his heart to grab your cheeks, smushing them together and whispering your name with a shake of his head.

“What is it?” he urges, and you wrap your fingers around his wrist to loosen his grip. You shut your eyes, take a deep breath and count to three in your head before you can talk yourself out of leaning forward and pressing your lips to his.

You feel him falter for a half second before he’s kissing you back, pulling your face closer and pushing his body toward yours. You can’t hear anything over the blood rushing in your ears when his tongue touches yours, and then suddenly his mouth is gone. He moves so quick you have to put your arms out to stop yourself from face planting into the cushion he had just been sitting on.

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” you gasp “i shouldn’t have done that, Haechan, I’m so sorry.”

It takes everything in you to look up to where he’s now standing with his arms crossed over his chest protectively. You have no idea what he’s thinking, staring down at you with wide eyes. Insecurity sweeps through you under his intense gaze, and you almost beg him to say something.

“I’m seeing someone,” the way the confession rings in your ears would have you believing that he screamed the words, but his voice was barely above a whisper “shit, I’m sorry.”

You aren’t sure if it’s your life that flashes before your eyes, or your years of friendship with him, at this point the two tend to blur together.

“That’s-” you sit back on your calves and inhale shakily, knowing it’s not even worth it to attempt to fake any sort of excitement for him “why didn’t you tell me?”

He shrugs, swallowing thickly and pulling his eyes away from your face to stare at the ceiling “It’s new and I didn’t know how. It just never came up.”

“Well then, I’m sorry that it didn’t. I shouldn’t have done that, I don’t know what came over me.” grateful that he’s finally the one avoiding eye contact with you so he doesn’t see your legs wobble when you stand “probably best to pretend that never happened. I’m just drunk and I missed you-”

Your name sounds so pathetic when he says it this time and you think it’s the eighth wonder of the natural world that you haven’t started crying yet. You shake your head instead, wishing so desperately that you had changed out of the dress you were wearing as you pull the slinky material down your thighs.

“Honestly, Haechan,” You regret your next words before they even hit the air “you should probably go. You have an early morning.”

The shock on his face pains you, but you can’t stand to see what you can only assume is pity growing in his eyes for another second.

“I don’t want to go, I want to talk about this.”

“I’m sorry.” you say again and his shoulders slump in defeat, recognizing that you’d made up your mind.

“It’s okay.” He means it, shuffling forward and the look on your face is nearly enough to bring him to his knees. His breath catches when you shift away the inch he moved toward you, eyes locked on his and he can see the desperation in them before he hears it in your voice.

“Text me when you get to the hotel?” your voice cracks with a heavy mix of exhaustion and embarrassment that makes him nods once, grabbing his things and walking slowly toward your door. He turns to look at you, but his words catch in his throat when he sees your eyes begin to water, mustering up all his energy to offer what he prays is a reassuring smile before letting himself out.

You sink back into the couch when the door clicks shut, head hanging in your hands as the tears finally start to flow. You cry so hard you feel like you could throw up, replaying his rejection over and over in your mind, shame and regret coursing through your veins. Pure embarrassment heats your body at the look on his face when he told you he was seeing someone, and you’re not sure if it was disgust or pity in his eyes.

On top of the rejection, knowing that he didn’t feel like he could share something as big as meeting someone with you was a dagger to the heart, up until recently you had never kept a secret from him, and even this one you clearly couldn’t keep in for long.

You force yourself into the shower, scrubbing angrily at your skin under the scalding water. You get out once your fingers have pruned and your skin feels raw, avoiding the mirror on your way to your bedroom. You kick angrily at the dress you'd left on the floor, watching it land near the pile of outfits you had discarded while getting ready.

Haechan had texted you nearly thirty minutes earlier

“made it back”

you give it a thumbs up before turning your phone off, setting an alarm with the clock on your side table and letting the emotional exhaustion lull you to sleep.

------

Haechan is realizing that there is no way in hell that you need space more than he needs to talk to you. He tries to call you multiple times the first week after you kissed him but you never answered, and Haechan doesn’t want to push you to the point of no return. What he really wants is to go back in time and not leave you that night, but the pain in your eyes was so pronounced he couldn't bare to make it any worse. The only physical proof that you had kissed him at all being the stupid blue thumbs up on the text he had sent you that night. It's followed by a slew of reassuring texts, saying that he broke up with his girlfriend and if you would please just talk to him, that he's not mad.

This is the feeling he carries with him nearly two weeks later on the flight to you, when he’s sure that another minute of silence from you will kill him. By the time he gets to your apartment it’s almost midnight, so he knocks loud enough to wake you up.

When you open the door in a shirt he thinks might be his, Haechan knows he has no choice. He's speaking before you can say anything, before he can change his mind.

"I came here to tell you that I think you're being really stupid." He curses internally for the obvious nerves in his voice, your tired eyes widen with shock at his words.

"Excuse me?"

"Years ago you made me swear that I would tell you if you ever came up with a reason not to be my friend anymore. So I'm telling you now, I think you're being really fucking stupid."

"I'm not doing that" You defend yourself, tearing up at the sight of him. He pushes into your apartment, shutting the door behind him and standing close enough to touch. He’s staring you down with pleading eyes, and you bury your face in your hands so you don’t have to look at him.

“Then why are you ignoring me? Why won’t you let me fix this?”

“I don’t know I just,” you inhale shakily “I don't know how to do it right now, not like this."

"Like what?" He hopes he already knows the answer, but needs to hear you say it, to know that you’re as serious as he is. Your mouth feels full of cotton when he forces you to look at him by whispering your name, pulling your hands from your face and his heart pinches tightly at the tears welling in your eyes "please tell me, please. Like what?"

"You already know," your bottom lip betrays you, voice weak beneath heavy emotion when you speak "I love you, Haechan. I'm in love with you, and I don't know what to do about it. I feel like I fucked everything up, but I can’t undo it."

He feels his lungs fill with relief. Haechan steps forward to close the small gap between your bodies, grabbing your jaw to rest his forehead against yours. You falter, but his hand on the small of your back keeps you from going anywhere, he's practically panting and you can barely stand, dizzy with the feeling of him. You want to pinch yourself to make sure you’re not dreaming when he whispers "You didn't fuck anything up."

He ghosts his lips over yours for a moment until he's sure you're not going to stop him. When he finally kisses you it's with years of pent up adoration, directing your arms around his neck and pressing his thumb firmly into your jaw, long fingers wrapping around the side of your throat. He practically whines when your fingers tighten in his hair and your lips part for his warm tongue. His arm wraps around your waist so tightly you have to hinge backward to keep your mouths connected, gasping at the strength you didn't know he had.

He keeps your stomach flush to his own and kisses you until you're practically limp in his arms, pulling away to breathe. His eyes are shut as he rubs his nose over yours

"I love you, too. I've been meaning to tell you for a while." All the blood rushes into your ears at his words and you can't stop your biggest worry from spilling into the air.

“What if you change your mind?”

“I made up my mind a long time ago, there's nothing you could do to change it." He blinks his eyes open, pulling his face away from yours just enough to see you, the trepidation in your eyes makes him say your name quietly.

"It's only me, you know me," he assures you in a hushed tone "you have to know by now that you are my entire world."

You could laugh, only him, as if he hasn’t been one of the most important people in your life since the day you met. As if he isn’t someone who has seen you at every stage of it so far. It’s Haechan, who has always been funny, who has witnessed the worst sides of you and never made you feel bad, who has never left your side.

You kiss him again, fingers wrapping in tight fists around his shirt to keep yourself grounded. Haechan’s heart pounds happily in his chest and he hopes you can feel it this time, both hands nestling into your hair. He kisses you gently in an effort to slow down your urgent movements, moaning at the taste of your mouth. You fall into his rhythm easily, the way his tongue rolls gently over yours makes your body go up in flames. You move your hands to slide beneath his shirt, landing on the strong muscles in his back and teasing your fingers up his sides.

When you finally come up for air he stares at you for a minute before laughing, stomach tightening beneath your fingers when he does.

"What's funny?" you shut your eyes, leaning your forehead into his chest, letting the pretty sound ring in your ears.

"Nothing, I'm just-" he cuts himself off with a shrug, nuzzling his nose into the crown of your head "I love you, and you love me back. That's all, that's how easy it is."

"It hasn't been easy at all, in fact my life has been very very hard since your birthday last year.” He pulls away from your head to ogle at you.

"My birthday last year?" You nod, feeling your cheeks flush under his intense gaze, it had really been that long "God, I'm sorry I'm such a fucking idiot."

He's kissing you again before you can ask him to elaborate, grabbing hold of both wrists in one hand while he walks you backward and guides you up onto the counter as slowly as he has to in order to keep his lips on yours. His hips are the perfect height for you to wrap your legs around, gasping in surprise when he slides his hands around your ass and presses your core tightly against the growing bulge in his jeans.

You feel shy when you pull away to ask if he wants to go to your bedroom, feeling frozen in place when he stares at you with half lidded eyes, his plump lips swollen and red.

"Tonight, I'm just kissing you." Every cell in his body is screaming in protest at his own words. He can't express how badly he wants to do everything else, to recreate his dreams, to learn the parts of your body he'd never seen before. But he can't imagine doing anything but this tonight, just this; his lips on yours, your breath in his lungs and your body melting into his.

"Why?” your eyebrows pull together in confusion. You practically shiver with need, tucking your arms between your stomachs and burying your nose in his throat. His laugh buzzes against your face, rubbing his hands gently over your shoulders and trying to control his own breathing as your lips brush over his skin.

All he can say is, “Because I’ve been needing to for a long time.”

“How long?” You pull away from his chest, leaning back onto your hands and closing your eyes when he runs his own down your sternum and over your waist, groping at the flesh of your hips and trying not to regret his romantic side.

“Way too long.”

“Your birthday?” you ask, tugging gently at his shirt. He plants his hands outside of your legs to lean in close, one corner of his mouth pulling up.

“Much longer.” Your eyes widen in shock, and he interrupts you before you can question him “can we talk about it later? I have something really important to do tonight.”

———

He tells you that he's had feelings for you since senior year of college, when you kissed Jeno. He tells you about his plan to admit everything when he had seen you on his birthday, but that he was too scared. He assures you he ended his relationship the moment he got back home the previous week “because everyone has felt like a matter of 'when' it will end, not 'if',” He tells you that just two weeks of your silence hurt worse than any previous heartbreak, and you agree. And before you fell asleep next to him he tells you again, ‘I'm so in love with you.’ and shimmies excitedly when you say it back before kissing you until you can barely keep your eyes open. He holds your cheeks in his hands and practically lulls you to sleep with his tongue, plush lips pressing to yours so gently you can hardly feel them dotting around the rest of your face. He thinks he could do this forever before sleep finally catches up with him, his arm slung over your side to hold your face to his chest.

You wake up curled into a familiar side, your first emotion being giddy as the night floods back to you. Despite your obvious willingness to go further, Haechan had meant it when he said he'd only be kissing you. It made you crazy at first, but when the two of you were staring at each other in the mirror with shy eyes while moving through a nighttime routine you had gotten familiar with years before, you were happy he had the self control you clearly lack. The idea of him actually seeing and touching you in ways he never had before, of doing all the things you'd found yourself imagining him doing over the last year; it was overwhelming. Kissing until your jaw was sore and your lips were swollen felt easy.

You’re startled by Haechan’s hand reaching for yours, holding your palm and bringing your fingers to his lips to press a kiss to each one, “good morning.” his voice is deep and tired, mouth landing on the crown of your head.

"Good morning." You press your nose into his chest happily, gripping his hand in yours and resisting the urge to squeal with delight.

"What are you so excited about, me?" He teases, hand falling on your thigh to guide your leg up the front of his, stopping just below his crotch and you hope he's going to give you what you'd been wanting all night, for the last year.

"You, I just can't believe how happy I am." You admit, lifting your head off of his chest to smile at him. He pulls you right back down, kissing your lips once before rolling you both over so he's on top of you. He presses a hand over your collarbone and drags his lips down your chin and over your throat.

"You know, this means you're all mine now." he smirks against your neck when you nod, gasping when he sucks gently at the base. He has one forearm on the mattress, the other hand too gentle on your ribs. You can feel that he's hard and you immediately roll your hips up.

"Does this mean you're gonna do more than just kiss me now?" you intend to sound confident, but it comes out as a whimper. His nose brushes over your jaw before he presses lingering kisses to your chin and cheek.

"Yes, baby, if you'll let me." You nod eagerly, shifting your face so your lips are beneath his and sighing happily when he lowers his weight onto your torso, licking into your mouth. You shiver with anticipation when he pushes at your shirt, long fingers tickling up your side before landing on your breast. You gasp into his mouth when his thumb brushes over your already hard nipple.

Your impatience is overwhelming, grabbing the back of his shirt and tugging it up to his shoulders. He pulls away reluctantly, reaching one hand toward his back and pulling his shirt over his head. You gnaw at your lip, running your hands over his stomach and hooking your knees around his hips as much as you can while stretching your arms over your head.

“Cute.” he murmurs, pulling your shirt up and tossing it to the side. He gropes at your chest, tongue wetting his lips before he leans down to wrap them around one of your nipples. He’s trying to act without thinking, to let the dreams he’s had pave the path down your body because he knows the second he acknowledges his nerves he won’t be able to shake them off. His heart thrums when you gasp above him, arching your chest into his mouth. He’s greedy for your sounds, his hands squeezing your breasts together and licking between them to get to the other nipple. When your hips buck up into his he groans, pulling away from your chest and staring down at you with wondering eyes.

“Can I?” He feels unnaturally shy, leaning back on his calves and watching his fingers press dimples into the flesh of your hips above your underwear, tugging at the hem.

“You don’t need to ask.” He smiles, forcing you to sit by grabbing the back of your neck for a kiss. His fingers press into your clothed core and your hips roll into his hand. He sighs into your mouth at your desperation, torn between teasing you and touching you everywhere.

You can’t keep your legs from shutting around his arm when he pushes your panties to the side and slides his middle and ring finger up your wet center, circling over your clit.

You pull away from the kiss, blinking up at him and your mouth falls open when he presses firmly on your clit, rubbing in slow circles. His head hangs as he lets out a quiet “fuck” at your reaction, moving his hand off your neck to stroke over your stomach and without it behind your head you have to lie back, he presses your legs open. Haechan stares at your chest while he settles between your knees, pushing two fingers inside your dripping core. His jaw hangs open, watching his knuckles disappear inside of you.

“So soft,” he breathes, staring down to where his fingers glisten when he pulls them out to rub over your clit again, palming over his cock getting harder in his sweats “want to be everywhere at once.”

“Want you everywhere.” you whine when his fingers pull away to hook into your underwear, tugging them down your legs. Haechan stands to strip and you hold your breath and soak in the soft swell of his hip that leads to where his cock hangs heavy between his legs. It’s pretty like the rest of him, and thicker than you'd expected with a leaking tip that matches the color of his tongue, he strokes himself once and you don’t get the chance to reach for him before he lays back on the bed, rolling you to sit on top of him. You shudder when your pulsing clit rubs over his stomach, inner thigh squeezing into his ribs. He runs his hands up your waist, scooting you an inch higher and grabbing onto your tits.

“Do you remember a few months ago, when you called me drunk and I told you I was dreaming about hanging out with you?” He shivers when you grind down in response, wet pussy sliding easily over his skin “I lied.”

Your hands press into his chest, tilting your head “what were we doing?” you can barely speak above a whisper when he pinches gently at your nipple with one hand, the other rubbing over your ribs when he smirks up at you.

“You were about a foot higher than you are right now,” you gasp and reach out to grab the headboard when he jolts his hips to move you up his chest, staring down at him with wide eyes as he shifts to wrap his arms under your legs, fingers pressing into your thighs.

“You dreamt about this?” you let him bring your hips to hover over his face, hands falling into his hair when he brushes his nose over your clit as he nods.

“All the time,” he moans and drags you down onto his face, lips wrapping around your clit. You shudder above him, letting some of your weight collapse into your heels and he groans happily at the pressure of you on his chin, pressing you harder onto his mouth to fuck his tongue into you. He wants to devour you, every sound you make goes straight to his cock which is already rock hard at the taste and smell of you. Even just thinking about the fact that it's your hips grinding over his face right now is enough to make him moan into your pussy.

You slur out praise, one of your hands shooting up to grip the headboard. His hands wander gently up your sides, eyes opening to stare up to where he plays with your tits, hard cock pulsing at the sight of your head thrown back, hips moving in gentle circles over his face. Haechan’s hand tugs yours down to his hair, trying to restrain himself from thrusting into the empty air at the feeling of you all over him. He hums happily into your pussy when you start to grind over his mouth, flattening his tongue for you to ride until your legs are shaking.

He lets out a deep “mmhmm” when you warn him that you’re going to cum, suckling hard on your clit until you’re practically begging him to let you go, body crumpling forward with both hands tangled in his hair. He's grateful you didn't touch his cock, just the thought of your fingers wrapped around him is enough to make him cum and he has other plans.

You can’t speak when you collapse onto the mattress beside him, immediately warmed by the weight of his body on top of yours as he slots himself between your thighs, sucking a hickey onto the front of your throat.

“Taste too fucking good,” he hums, mouthing over your chin and cheek “been dreaming of eating your sweet pussy for so long.” you practically swoon when he kisses you, pre-cum wetting the inside of your thigh when he relaxes his stomach onto yours.

“Hyuck, want you in me, please” Your vision is blurry, whining into his swollen lips. He works them over your cheek before pulling away from you, bringing one of your legs up to his shoulder and you rest the other knee on his hip. He can feel himself pant when he taps the head of his cock on your swollen clit, practically drooling when he sticks barely the tip inside before pulling back and repeating the tantalizing motion.

“Been waiting for too long to be teased,” you pout, trying to encourage his hips toward yours with the ankle he’s not pressing his cheek into. He smirks and circles his leaking tip over you again, watching his cock spread your arousal around before he pushes into you a little further.

“I’m taking my time with you, feels so fucking good.” He can’t look away from between your thighs, messy hair hanging over his forehead while his fingers grip your ankle tightly. You whimper when he pulls all the way out again, one more hard tap against your pulsing clit before he pushes himself halfway into your leaking pussy. You rise onto your elbows, trying to reach one hand to grab for his hip but he releases the base of his cock to stop you by lacing your fingers together. When Haechan finally looks into your eyes he bottoms out, stretching your leg toward your chest so he can lean in. His hips stutter, a choked groan rumbling deep in his chest.

“Oh my god, Hyuck please.” you beg him to move with a gasp. His forehead presses to your chin, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Fuck, baby, been needing you," he thrusts into you slowly, lifting his head to look down at you glowing beneath him with your eyes shut. He pulls out all the way before thrusting back inside, quickening his hips when your eyes flutter open, the look on your face enough to make his balls tighten slightly, shutting his eyes to regain self control "knew you'd feel so fucking good."

"M’so full, Haechan." you moan at his words and the rapid slap of his hips on the back of your thighs, forcing your eyes to stay open so you can see his face. The way his nose scrunches with focus when he pulls away from your chest, both his hands wrapping firmly around your hips while he watches his cock sink into you. Brown, shaggy hair sticks to his damp forehead, full lower lip taken between his teeth. He’s pure, unadulterated boyish beauty, and he’s all yours.

You squeak when he lets your leg drop off his shoulder, pressing your thigh as far open as it will go with your heel digging into his backside. He fans his fingers over your lower stomach, thumb reaching down to push your clit side to side and your hips tuck up for more pressure, Haechan moans loudly when the movement causes you to clamp around his cock, "Perfect fucking pussy, can't believe it's mine now. Like my fingers on your pretty clit?”

You nod enthusiastically, letting go of your breasts to hold the backs of your thighs, Haechan's eyes move up your body to stare at your chest move beneath him, nipples looking sweet as candy. He’s dying to sink his fingers into the softest part of your stomach, the way you’re moving for him makes his mind turn to sand. You stare down to where his thumb is making circles over your clit, perfectly timed with the head of his cock bruising your g-spot. You feel a second orgasm build and the corner of his mouth pulls up proudly when your legs shake. Your head hangs back as you gasp for air, "yes, please, Haechan feels so fucking good."

"Make the prettiest noises for me, want you cumming all over my cock." he leans forward just enough to trap your throat beneath the weight of his palms, other hand still moving over your swollen clit. You smile at the pressure of his body on yours, eyes fluttering shut while you moan. You nod desperately when he asks if you can do that, "if you can let me make you feel that good, please, my pretty girl."

He takes his hand off your throat when you cum, wanting to hear every sound you could possibly make. You repeat his name like a blessing that has him cumming with you, moaning and breathless as his hips start to slow, milking you both through your orgasms.

You wrap your arms around him when he pulls out of you, reveling in the feeling of him when he lowers himself down, burrowing his face into your neck and warming your skin with his breath. You hold him there for a minute until he pulls his head up, dopey smile lighting up his eyes and making you laugh.

“What?” you scrunch your nose at him “better than your dreams?”

He nods, “so much better, best I ever had, my body belongs to you now.” he smirks at his own words, but his tone is so gentle he can’t even call it a joke.

“Just your body?” you tease, and he leans his nose onto your lips for a kiss that you carry onto the mole under his eye.

“Body, mind, heart, soul,” he sighs happily when you cup his cheeks in your hands, kissing him gently “all the planets in my head.”

"All the planets in my head too."

————

masterlist

authors note // this ended up being much longer than i anticipated, maybe the longest one shot i’ve ever actually written! i appreciate everyone who voted for happy ending because when i was originally thinking of a sad ending it was too hard lol. this feels forever unfinished because there is so much good to this version of haechan, i adore him.

#haechan #haechan fanfiction #haechan smut #nct #nct dream #nct 127 #nct dream fanfiction #nct dream smut #nct 127 fanfiction #nct 127 smut #nct fanfiction #nct smut

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fairqves · 3 months ago

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﹙ 🎬 ﹚ ────I’LL WAIT FOR YOUR LOVE.

(🧺) ── 𝓙EONG JAEHYUN﹙정재현﹚ ꒰ 𝓰. oneshot ៸ fluff ៸ f2l ୨୧ㅤㅤ WARNiNGS : not proofread ៸ kissing ៸ lovesick jae❞ best friend! jaehyun x 𝑓! reader ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ꒰ WC : 2.7K ꒱ SYPNoSiS 𐙚 year by year, moment by moment, growing up with jaehyun has led to the love you’ve been waiting for all along .ᐟ ── LiBRARY

─2005

THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET JEONG JAEHYUN,

you’re both eight years old, and it’s the last day of second grade—it’s one of those annoyingly hot afternoons where the sun is brighter than ever, stretching shadows across the playground.

you’re sitting on the swings, your feet barely brushing the sand, when you notice a boy standing nearby, hesitating, as if unsure whether to approach.

he’s holding a small toy in his hands, a little red car with chipped paint, and he’s staring at it with a furrowed brow.

he finally looks up and meets your gaze, and there’s something curious and open in his eyes.

“hi,” he says, his voice nervous but steady. “i’m jaehyun.”

you tilt your head, watching him, and he gestures to the empty swing beside you. “can i sit?” ── 𝖱𝖤𝖲𝖳 𝖡𝖤𝖫𝖮𝖶!

you nod, and he sits down, gripping the rusty chains of the swing and kicking his feet off the ground in a way that feels awkward, like he’s too big for it already.

for a while, the two of you just sit, listening to the squeak of the swings and the lively chatter of the kids around you.

“i like the swings,” he finally says, his voice quiet. “it feels like i’m flying, like superman.”

you smile, feeling an instant connection to this boy with his shy smile and big dreams. “me too, but batman’s better than superman.”

from that day on, jaehyun becomes a constant in your life.

every day after school, he finds you on the playground, and together, you make up games, share secrets, and talk about everything from your favorite snacks to the names you’d give your future pets.

he tells you he wants to be a singer someday, his face lighting up with excitement, and you tell him that you think he’ll be amazing at it.

─2010

MIDDLE SCHOOL ARRIVES, BRINGING A LOAD OF CHANGE.

suddenly, jaehyun is taller, his voice has deepened, and he’s taken up basketball.

you notice the way people seem to watch him now, like he’s someone worth paying attention to.

but even though he’s growing into himself, becoming the kind of boy who can light up a room, he’s still your best friend.

one autumn afternoon, the two of you are sitting on the grass behind the school, sharing a pack of chips after practice.

the leaves are a vibrant mix of orange and red around you, and the air is crisp, the kind that makes you feel alive.

as you talk, he reaches over and plucks a small wildflower growing in the grass, examining it with a thoughtful expression—without a word, he hands it to you, his cheeks turning pink.

“it reminded me of you,” he says, a little shyly. “small but… strong.”

you take the flower, feeling a warmth bloom in your chest that you can’t quite place your finger on.

you press it between the pages of your notebook that night, letting it dry as a quiet reminder of that moment, a memory of a shift between you, unspoken but deeply felt.

─2014

BY HIGH SCHOOL, JAEHYUN IS SOMEONE EVERYONE NOTICES.

he’s joined the basketball team and fills out his uniform in a way that turns heads—girls pass him notes in class, and he’s always surrounded by people who want to be near him, to bask in his warmth.

but even with all the attention, he never changes around you.

he’s still the boy who waits for you outside your classroom, who finds you in the crowded hallways with an easy smile.

one friday night, there’s a big party, and he convinces you to go with him—the house is filled with people, the music loud and the lights dim.

you feel a little out of place, but jaehyun stays by your side, his arm slung over your shoulder as he introduces you to his friends, laughing and making sure you’re comfortable.

at some point, the noise becomes too much, and you slip outside for a moment to catch your breath.

you’re leaning against the porch railing, looking up at the stars, when you hear footsteps behind you.

“hey,” jaehyun’s voice is soft, and he’s smiling as he joins you, leaning beside you on the railing. “you okay?”

you nod, grateful for the quiet moment away from the crowd. “just needed some air.”

he watches you, his gaze warm. “thanks for coming with me. i know parties aren’t really your thing.”

his words make you feel seen in a way that goes deeper than friendship, and you wonder if he can hear your heart pounding in the stillness.

for a moment, you’re both quiet, the night stretching around you, and you feel a longing settle deep in your chest—a quiet, insistent feeling that you’re almost afraid to acknowledge.

─2016

SENIOR YEAR IS A BITTERSWEET TIME.

the two of you are talking about colleges, dreams, and the future—you’ve applied to different universities, and the thought of not seeing jaehyun every day makes your heart ache.

one afternoon, you’re sitting in the school gym, watching as he practices with the basketball team.

he’s focused, his movements graceful and sure, and you find yourself lost in the sight of him—when practice ends, he jogs over, grinning, his hair damp with sweat.

“thanks for waiting,” he says, a little breathless, he tosses his towel over his shoulder, his smile softening as he looks at you.

“can we go somewhere?” he asks after a moment, his voice quiet.

there’s a vulnerability in his gaze that you rarely see, and you nod, letting him lead you outside.

you end up at the park, the same one where you met years ago.

sitting on the swings, just like you did when you were kids, there’s a feeling of nostalgia between you, a sense that something is ending.

“i’m going to miss this,” he murmurs, his voice soft. he looks at you, his eyes reflecting the sadness in your own.

for a moment, you feel a surge of courage, the desire to tell him everything that’s been building in your heart over the years.

but the words catch in your throat, and instead, you reach over, slipping your hand into his.

“me too,” you whisper.

─2018

UNIVERSITY IS A STRANGE AND LONELY PLACE WITHOUT JAEHYUN.

you both try to stay in touch, texting and calling when you can, but the distance is hard, the busy schedules and new friendships creating gaps that you can’t always bridge.

but you still make time for each other, clinging to the friendship that has been your constant for so long.

one weekend, he comes to visit you—the moment you see him standing outside your dorm, that familiar, warm smile lighting up his face, it feels like coming home.

you spend the day exploring the city, eating at food stalls, wandering through bookstores, laughing and talking like no time has passed at all.

that night, you’re lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling in the dark.

jaehyun is beside you, his breathing steady and soft—you can feel the warmth of his body, the comfort of his presence, and you wonder if he knows how much he means to you.

in the quiet darkness, he reaches over, his hand finding yours. “you’re still my favorite person,” he whispers, his voice carrying a vulnerability that makes your heart ache.

you squeeze his hand, the words catching in your throat. “you’re mine too, jaehyun.”

─2021

NOW TWENTY-FOUR,

you’re both navigating the chaos of post-college life, juggling work, bills, and responsibilities.

jaehyun’s career is taking off, his life filled with new challenges, new dreams.

and though your paths have diverged, you still find time for each other, the bond between you as strong as ever.

one evening, he shows up at your apartment, looking exhausted and worn, the weight of his schedule pressing heavily on his shoulders.

without a word, you pull him inside, letting him sink onto the couch.

you make him tea, sitting beside him as he sips it slowly, his eyes closed in relief. “thanks for this,” he murmurs, his voice soft. “i just… needed a break.”

you reach over, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. “you don’t have to do everything alone, jaehyun. i’m here.”

his eyes open, meeting yours, and there’s something deep and raw in his gaze, a quiet acknowledgment of everything you’ve shared over the years.

he reaches for your hand, holding it tightly, his thumb brushing over your knuckles in a way that feels intimate, grounding.

“i don’t know what i’d do without you,” he says, his voice thick with emotion.

and in that moment, you know that no matter where life takes you, he’ll always be a part of your story.

─2023

NOW AT TWENTY-SIX,

you’re both a little older, a little wiser, but still tethered by that bond that has carried you through every stage of life.

you’ve shared dreams, heartaches, and countless memories, and through it all, your feelings for jaehyun have only grown, a quiet love that’s been there all along.

one summer evening, you’re at his apartment, cooking dinner together.

the kitchen is a mess, there’s sauce spilled on the counter, the scent of garlic filling the air.

you’re laughing, both of you a little tipsy, the warmth of the wine making you feel bold.

as you sit down to eat, jaehyun looks at you, his expression serious, his gaze soft and steady.

“there’s something i’ve been meaning to tell you, i’ve been putting it off for about a decade though,” he says jokingly, but you could hear the weight behind his words.

your heart skips a beat, and you meet his gaze, feeling the seriousness of the mood.

“i think… i think i’ve been in love with you for a long time,” he confesses, his voice trembling anxiously. “i didn’t know how to tell you, or even if i should. but i can’t keep it to myself anymore.”

tears fill your eyes as you reach for his hand, your fingers entwining. “i’ve been waiting for you to say that for so so long,” you whisper, your voice heavy with emotion. “i love you too, jaehyun.”

in that moment, every doubt, every fear melts away, leaving only the truth that’s been there all along—he’s the love you’ve been waiting for.

and as he pulls you into his arms, holding you close, you know that you’ve finally made it where you were always meant to be.

─PRESENT DAY

NOW, LYING BESIDE JAEHYUN IN THE EARLY MORNING LIGHT,

you feel the quiet peace that comes from being right where you’re meant to be.

the sunlight filters softly through the blinds, gentle rays fill the room and paints jaehyun’s face in warm, golden light.

his arm is draped over your waist, and you can feel his slow, steady breathing, his warmth seeping into you as he stirs slightly, eyes fluttering open.

he blinks, looking at you with a sleepy smile, the kind that’s just for you, a little private thing that makes your heart swell.

his hair is tousled, his face soft with sleep, and you can’t help but reach up, brushing a strand away from his forehead.

“morning,” he murmurs, his voice thick and a little raspy, but filled with a tenderness that makes you feel like the luckiest person in the world.

“morning,” you reply, your voice just as soft.

for a moment, you both lie there in comfortable silence, simply watching each other, basking in the warmth of the morning and the quiet intimacy that fills the room.

jaehyun lifts his hand, gently running his thumb over your cheek, his eyes never leaving yours.

“what’s on your mind?” he asks quietly, a faint smile playing on his lips.

you smile back, feeling a warmth spread through you, a joy that’s almost too big for words. “you,” you whisper, feeling your cheeks heat up, even after all these years of knowing him.

his smile widens, a small chuckle escaping as he leans closer, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, gentle kiss that feels like a promise.

he pulls back, resting his forehead against yours, his eyes shining with that familiar, deep affection that has only grown with time.

“i really like that answer,” he murmurs, his voice a gentle murmur that echoes the countless quiet moments you’ve shared over the years.

as you lie there together, wrapped in each other’s arms, you think of everything you’ve been through, every stage of life you’ve faced side by side.

from playgrounds to high school hallways, from late-night calls in college to quiet evenings in the kitchen, your lives have been woven together in a bundle of shared moments, small joys, and unspoken promises.

jaehyun sighs, a contented, happy sound as he pulls you closer, his hand trailing up and down your back in a slow, comforting rhythm.

“i don’t think i ever told you this,” he says, his voice a quiet murmur. “but there was always something about you… from the very beginning. even as kids, i knew that you were going to be someone special to me. someone i couldn’t live without.”

you smile, feeling a lump form in your throat as his words sink in—you reach up, cupping his cheek, brushing your thumb along his jawline.

“i think i always knew, too,” you say softly. “you’ve been my best friend, my constant… and now my love.”

a warmth blooms between you, filling the room with a quiet kind of joy that feels both old and new, a love that’s grown through years of friendship and shared memories.

jaehyun presses a gentle kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering as he whispers, “thank you for waiting for me. for always being there.”

you close your eyes, leaning into his touch, your heart swelling with a happiness that feels almost overwhelming.

“you were worth the wait, jaehyun,” you murmur, feeling the truth of those words settle around you like a warm blanket.

the two of you stay like that for a while, wrapped up in each other, letting the quiet morning stretch around you.

it’s a moment that feels suspended in time, a snapshot of a love that’s been years in the making, built on a foundation of trust and friendship.

eventually, he shifts, pulling you closer, his gaze soft as he studies your face.

“what do you say we make breakfast?” he suggests, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

you laugh, feeling a rush of warmth at the familiar suggestion. “as long as you don’t burn the food this time,” you tease, poking his side.

jaehyun grins, a playful light in his eyes as he sits up, pulling you with him. “no promises,” he says, his laughter filling the room as he pulls you out of bed and leads you to the kitchen, your hands still intertwined.

as you sit down together, sharing a simple breakfast, you realize that this—these quiet, everyday moments—are the ones you’ll cherish the most.

because after all the years of waiting, all the moments of longing and uncertainty, you’ve finally found your way to each other after all your years of knowing him.

jaehyun reaches across the table, his hand finding yours, his fingers warm and steady around yours.

he looks at you, his eyes filled with a quiet, enduring love that speaks of all the years you’ve shared, all the small moments that have led you here.

and in that moment, with his hand in yours and his smile lighting up the room, you know that every second of waiting was worth it.

every second of waiting for his love was worth it.

NOTE. i genuinely enjoyed writing this sm !! i miss my husband already guys this is so horrendous T-T i was listening to we can’t be friends string ver while writing this i’m literally sobbing ☹️

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