#Mmmmmm okay I’m gonna go read my book now. Thank you for observing! Hope you have a splendid day!

[henry-hart]

The Secret Gets Out s1 ep3

Some quality Charlotte in this ep. Yay!!!!

ooh I know what happens in this one :))))

yay for that bb chenry content

Jasper just taking over the tv screen when c x h won’t watch his clip ajsklsj same

“CM’s big fail” man they do not go gentle with these video titles. really going for the throat

“Hey, look! My bellybutton!” Hen, sweetie. You need to work on your distractions 

Ray looks hella good. just saying. ;)

poor CM. his face when the news lady says, “once again escaping capture from CM.” HE’S TRYING, LADY.

“CM, isn’t it true that the phone shark has been attacking ppl’s phones for over a year now?” “Uh, yes that is true.” askjlk y does he sound like he’s on trial???

“So why don’t you catch him?” “Well, KD and I have been trying.” “But you keep failing. Doesn’t that bug you?” “Yes.” we always talk about Hen’s sass, but Ray has his snarky moments

AJSLKSLKJ JASPER BAD-MOUTHING KD AND HEN JUST STOPS DRINKING HIS DRINK AND IS LIKE, “One more time???” like, the pg version of “tf did you just say???”

“Just saying, I’d be way better at catching bad guys than KD.” “You couldn’t catch butt warts!!!!” Hen u couldn’t be anymore obvious if you tried aksljsjksjl 

“Why are you getting all mad?” “Because Jasper’s being unfair, and I think it’s unfair to criticize m--that...that KD guy when he’s probably doing the best he can. And people should be fair. Fairness. I’m pro-fair.” THAT’S RIGHT BB. U DEFEND YOURSELF. YOU ARE DOING YOUR BEST AND I AM PROUD OF U 

his lil pouty face after he gives his little speech is TOO CUTE

can I just say, once again, s1 Hen is the cutest thing ever 

@jace how were u this cute at 13??? I didn’t even look human when i was that age aksjlksj

[MY DRAMATIC DAUGHTER, ENTER STAGE RIGHT]

Pipes blackmailing Jasp with that cup song video alksjslksj (no wonder her parents assumed it was her who was arrested in that xmas ep lolol)

“I NEVER DID THAT!!!! Why would I do that? I NEVER DID THAT!!!!”

Pipes just shoved Hen out the way to sit on the couch aksljslk

Henry didn’t put up much of a fight against Piper in these earlier eps (I mean, when does he ever anyway lol).

jasp....i love u...but...that video is really cringey....

Hen telling Pipes not to put the video on line :)))) my sweet son :)))))

Piper mocking Jasper in the video alkjlsk 

“Why does your watch beep like that?” “It means they need me at work....bye!” “Wait! It’s Sunday. Junk ‘n Stuff is closed on Sunday.” “Right....I better go tell the customers.” Henry you are a terrible liar

which is expected bc he’s sweet and a mess. not a combo that makes for a skilled liar alkjslkj

“There is something up with that boy.” YAS CHARLOTTE YAS my smart/observant daughter (tho hen does make it easy with his crap excuses lolol)

“I’m so tired.” “Oh, quit whining. It was only 4 miles.” “Yeah, 4 miles there and 4 miles back!” ajkjslk poor J

“Uuuggghhh I’m gonna die.” “NOT in the house! If you’re gonna die, do it outside!” Piper does not care. at all. 

so, what??? Char’s just been chillin in Hen’s room in the dark waiting for him to sneak back in??? lolol

poor hen had a mini heart attack ajklksj

Char clearly knows. she’s just asking all those questions to hear Hen’s bs lolol

“I like your shirt.” nice try hen. it’s not working, but nice try.

Char really covered all the bases. she called the store to see if Hen was really there. girl doesn’t mess around when she’s figuring something out. r.e.s.p.e.c.t.

“You wanna know the truth? I’m a jazz musician. I don’t tell a lot of people, but secretly, I play jazz. A-a-and the only time the jazz clubs are open is late at night.” Hen...who taught you how to lie????

God, P x H are such antipodes. You have one sibling who blackmails others with embarrassing secrets to get what they want and then you have the other sibling who can’t come up with a better lie than “I play jazz late at night” aksjslk

“That’s where I was---at a jazz club. Blowing jazz. On mah horn.” i love the way he says this lol

“That’s because YOU’RE Kid Danger!” and a hush falls over the room...

Hen, make as many weird noises and mock being KD all you want. It’s not working. aksjlskj

you know, even if Char wasn’t an uber smart cookie, hen makes it unbelievably easy to figure out

“And I guess you must be Beyonce.” AJKSJKSLJ AN ICONIC HENRY LINE TO PUT IN THE BOOKS, GUYS.

“Okay, this is really big, what I’m about to tell you.” “What? That you’re KD?” “Shuuut UUUuuuUUUpppp!” akljslkj

“I’m KD.” “I know. I figured that out.” CHARLOTTE YOU ARE MY QUEEN

“I swear I’m never gonna tell anyone.” “Thanks.” “Can I tell Jasper???” “Wha---NOOOOOO!!!!”

I love the way he says this in his lil 13 yr old squeaky voice aksjlsksj 

also Char wanting to include J from the get-go :’))))

Ray was so light and cheerful in this season. he’s all “Henry, I didn’t know you were working today. Did I butt-beep you???” whereas now he’s all “YoU cAn’T bE sIcK. yOu’Re ObViOuSlY lYiNg To Me!!!!” ugh

:(((( you can tell Hen is having a hard time telling Ray that Char knows

props to him tho. i would’ve put if off until it eventually just came out at the worst time possible jakjslskj

“Can I talk to you about something?” “Uhhhh....babies come from the baby store!!!” oh Ray

“What’d you tell her?” “That I am KD.” “Ohhhh.” “You’re not mad, are you?” “No, I’m not mad.” “Oh, good.” “You’re fired.” jkalsjlk RAY YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TERRIBLE HE IS AT LYING. IT WOULD’VE BEEN SO MUCH WORSE IF HE KEPT UP THE LIE

also Hen’s face is causing me pain. he’s so sad :((((

Ray’s being so serious....I’m not used to this. 

“When trust is broken, it can never be fixed.” “Yes it can!” “Read this fortune cookie.” “’When trust is broken, it can never be fixed’....” “Let’s not argue with the Chinese.” aksjslk 

also Ray is really that next level extra. he has fortune cookies to prove his point lolol a legend

Henry listening to jazz and downing a bottle of chocolate syrup alksjslk is this the pg version of drowning your woes in alcohol???

“You’re not gonna find the answer at the bottom of a bottle of chocolate.” *takes bottle away* *Hen takes out a second bottle* “I won’t know if I don’t look.” 

my poor bb. he really thinks he’s a lousy KD

I WANT TO HUG HIM THRU MY LAPTOP SCREEN.

HEN YOU SAVED CM ON YOUR SECOND DAY ON THE JOB. YOU ARE A GREAT KD. 

klajdkl Henry singing a sad version of the cup song

they played a cheering sound effect while he sang omg

(I remember watching a vid where Jace said he doesn’t sing and it’s “probably for the best.” aksjslkjs)

classic pouty/depressed hen laying on his couch. :((((

it’s kind of playing tricks on my mind bc i remember when he did that after he couldn’t defeat Drex, but he looked SOOOO much older in that ep lolol

Jasp having to do Piper’s chores lol

“Henry, come to the Swellview Park right now.” “Nooooo. I’m not in the mood for trees.” jaklsj it be like that sometimes

Piper: “AHHHHH!!!! HEN-RYYYY!!!” Henry: *sighs like ‘here we go again’* akjslk

I LOVE THESE PIPER X HENRY INTERACTIONS (even if it’s her yelling at him lolol)

“Is that makeup on your face???” jokes on you, Hen. you’re all wearing makeup.

i love the faces Hen makes while Piper yells. they’re great

gotta hand it to Ella. she was really committed to this part

“To a club with mah gurlsss.” PIPER NO

“Club 11″ god can u imagine a whole place dedicated to 10-11 yr olds??? i have siblings that age and it’s the worst. possible. age. ever. 

I don’t even understand them most the time. you think i would be able to considering how in tune I am with my kid side, but the stuff they do/say/like is lost on me

sorry for that sidebar

okay, Piper has a fake ID??? a fake license, a fake ID. HOW R U AND HEN EVEN RELATED???

Hen’s out here fighting crime while his lil sis is committing them akljsslkj

I love Hen’s overall indifference??? Like, he’s just like “you better hope mom doesn’t find out” he’s not threatening to tell on her. he just like “not my problem”

even when she’s yelling at him he’s like “whatever. i gotta go.” ajlskjlk I love him

j now has blackmail of his own. oh, how the tables have turned. 

“THIS IS NOT OKAY!!!!!” NEITHER IS YOU TRYING TO GET INTO CLUBS UNDERAGE, PIPER!!!!!

Char is so awesome. instead of just feeling bad about getting hen fired, she’s out her actively trying to help him out, and she’s not doing it for him. she’s just guiding him. she leaves all the redeeming to him. what a stand up character. wow. i lover her. 

wedding crashers chenry style aljksjsl

duh it looks like the phone shark, hen. HE HAS METAL TEETH.

“Now go do CM a favor and catch the phone shark.....Kid Danger.” I squealed. we love supportive bffs here

Hen’s got that pep back in his step 

“What up with the gum?” aksjlsklsj 

OKAY ABOUT THIS GUM THING

I thought Schwoz made the gum???? If he did, then how does Hen have a tube with his own gum for his costume??? Ray and Schwoz are estranged at this point in the show. Schwoz doesn’t even know Ray has a sidekick let alone who Hen is, so how??? does he??? have it????

are they trying to tell me Ray made it???

i love him, but no. 

maybe Gooch??? 

I don’t know

“In sickness and in health, in fitness and obesity, as long as you both can stand it.” these wedding vows are more accurate than the traditional ones, honestly

Henry. looks. so. cute. in. his. lil. costume. like. a. baby. duck. trying. to. be. a. superhero. :)))))

okay, so phone shark guy bites phones, but why??? like, does he eat them, or does he just enjoy biting them??

homeboy is looking at hen’s phone like it’s a whole snack....so he does eat them???

i need to know. 

“Mmmmmm gotta love that new phone smeeEEeeellll.” akjslkj jace was so goofy in the earlier seasons

Charlotte......y do u have binoculars??? this is all happening ten feet in front of you.....???

HEN JUST JUMPED ON THE BACK OF A MAN WITH METAL TEETH. I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANYONE DISSING HIM AS A SIDEKICK OR ANYTHING ELSE. 

omg the phone shark spun hen and his feet clocked the bride in the face ajklsjlksj

yo wedding gifts are expensive af and Hen just made the phone shark wreck all of them lolol oops

EVERYONE IS CHEERING FOR KD. YAS. YAS. YAS. GIVE HIM THE RECOGNITION HE DESERVES. 

omg Hen’s lil celebration dance is so cute :))))

he. gave. CM. all. the. credit. can. u. believe. my. son. is. such. a. good. person.

“It was really my boss, CM.” “Interesting. Can you tell us more?” “.....No....” lololol

Ray’s all “you gave me all the credit” in this awed voice DAWWWWWW

y is he suited up as CM tho???

“Well everyone’s been giving you a hard time about catching the phone shark. I figured I’d help you out.” YA’LL I AM SOBBING. THIS IS THE SWEETEST BOY.OL

“Uhhhhh excuse me? I’m the one who found the phone shark.” 

TELL. THEM. CHARLOTTE. Like, who are you to go giving credit??? I’m the one who found him???

Ray doing one of those full body groans that he always does. dramatique

“Charlotte, Charlotte, Charlotte. What am I going to do with you?” “I think it’s pretty obvious: give me a job here! You guys need me.” GIRL YOU DON’T KNOW THE HALF OF IT.

srsly how many times does Char save their a**es??? too many times to count. hiring her is one of the best things you’ll ever do, Ray.

HENRY IS SUCH A LIL BEAN COMPARED TO`RAY. LIKE, THEY’RE STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER, BOTH WEARING THEIR SUPER SUITS, AND JUST---HENRY. IS. SO. TINY. O. M. G.

Char explaining how she found the phone shark and making it clear how obvious her thought process was while Ray x Hen are just like “.....”

“I called some dentists...” “We should’ve called some dentist!” “We totally should’ve!” “Then I went online...” “We should’ve gone online!” “What is wrong with us???”

they feel so dumb for not thinking of cheCKING DENTAL RECORDS FOR SOMEONE WITH METAL TEETH. HONESTLY YOU TWO. HOW HAVE YOU GOTTEN THIS FAR????

if it wasn’t obvious before that you need Char, is pretty obvious now. 

“Off to my cousin’s wedding. Hope they serve phones for dessert. LOL.” “She’s good.” “She is.” COME ON GUYS. I AGREE, CHAR IS GOOD, BUT HOW DO YOU NOT PIECE ALL THAT OBVIOUSNESS TOGETHER????

Honestly, Ray getting a younger sidekick makes the most sense to me because can u imagine Ray trying to navigate social media??? or going through the internet like char did??? or hacking into anything??? No.

dude needed some gen z kids to help him out with the modern world aljskljs

“She could really help us out around here.” YOU AIN’T LYING.

“Us???” “Oh, right....you fired me.” “Well you broke the oath.” he sounds like such a pouty manchild akjslkjskj

wow hen ur already on a first name basis with your boss

i don’t know why i’m just pointing this out

homeboy was calling him Ray within a few hours ajlkjsklsj

Hen was so happy when Ray hired him back :))))))

DAWWWW HEN X RAY JUST SHARED THE CUTEST HUG!!!!!!!!

Char: “Cough cough cough.” lolol

“What are you going to do about Charlotte???” “UUUuuuuuUUUggggGGGhhhHHH well, she knows you’re KD. She knows who I am. She knows where the Man Cave is because you brought her down here!” I laughed so hard here. poor Hen was too excited about his job well done so he just took Char into their super secret hideout akljslk

“Sooooooo what does that mean?” “That we either have to kill you, erase your brain, or give you a job.”

REALLY RAY. REALLY. YOU’RE WORRIED ABOUT YOUR SIDEKICK’S TRUSTWORTHY BFF SPILLING YOUR SECRET, BUT WHEN A VILLAIN. WHO. WANTS. TO. DESTROY. YOU!!!!! ESCAPES WITH BOTH YOUR IDENTITIES, YOU JUST LET HER GO???? YOU NEVER TRY TO FIND HER AGAIN???? TF?????

“I vote job.” “We can really erase her brain???” “Dude!” cuties

“Alright, she can have a job here--” *C x H celebrate* “--IF--” *C x H jump* “--she can pass the pickle test.” *C x H share similar ‘tf???’ expressions* 

BORK!!! MY MAN!!!! (i just realized Gooch wasn’t in this one)

I wish they’d give Bork more of a role. :( they just have him kind of....grunt....and that’s all.

I do like in the green finger ep where he just dumps Ray out of the shopping cart though bc same jkajlskjl (Ray was being such a baby in that ep and I would’ve done the same)

“You have to prove you’re clever enough to work for CM.” “I found the phone shark.” “Well anyone could do that.” “Not you two.” “Well, you know what--” “Okay, let’s not go there.” aksjdlkj

not gonna lie, when Ray was like, “get the pickle out” the first thing I thought of--before Char did it--was to just break the jar alkjslksj great minds think alike, Char ;)))

“How much time does she have?” “Exactly five min--” *shatters the jar* “Here’s your pickle.”

“That was Bork’s favorite jar.” pfffff

“So, wait, is Charlotte hired???” “Yeah....yeah she’s hired.”

they’re little celebratory high-five was too. cute. 

i love my smol happy bbs

Henry being all excited to show her the tubes :)))))

“Hug me.” *side-eyes him* “Just trust meee.” CLASSIC CHENRY MOMENT AJLKSJLSKJ

BORK COMING BACK TO GET HIS JAR AND SEEING IT BROKEN AJKLSJSLK THAT DRAMATIC LOOK OFF INTO THE DISTANCE WHILE A SINGLE TEAR FALLS DOWN HIS CHEEK. GET THIS MAN AN OSCAR ALKJLSKJ

Piper scrubbing J’s feet lolol that’s karma, P.

another wholesome episode that left me all smiley and happy :)))))

i love early Henry. he was such a little cutie who was excited about everything

there was some GREAT Char content this ep---she was one of the biggest parts

<3333