#Meanwhile I'm driving to work watching my hair turn gray

[cinemaocd]

I just want to watch Jane Fonda movies and smoke weed but noooooooooooooo I have to go to work and have responsibilities...

[thotsforvillainrights]

~Perfect Birthday~

Au: Kaishi

Part: twelve

Theme: Fluff? Comedy? Who knows lol

(These 2 are going on an adventure)

"Buttercream? No that wont do. Vanilla with a touch of banana or Strawberry? Shoot! What about...hmmm...." You focused on the ingredients so hard that you were developing a light headache. Meanwhile, your husband sat across from you at the kitchen table, scrolling through his laptop for themes and present ideas. "Y/N, just settle on chocolate and call it a day." Kai announced while his eyes hovered on a Circus theme. He shuddered lightly at the thought of animals being involved. 'Absolutely not' he thought to himself. You sighed and put the ingredients list down. "I cant settle on Chocolate. I'm worried that someone might have an allergy to it. I'm also so worried about the vegan adults that might be here. What about the picky eaters too? Kai, I feel like I'm going insane right now." You gripped the sides of the chair you sat on. He peeked up at you and notices your incoming distress. He sighed and stood up to move behind you. He softly gripped each of your shoulders and began to give you an impromptu massage. "Stop worrying so much about it so much, Angel. Just do chocolate cake since its the brat's favorite flavor. We can go with a vegan cupcake option that should be safe for the people with chocolate allergies as well. As for the others, there will be other food and even beverage options. You're working so hard for people I dont even care about. This is all for my son and no one else but him. His happiness is my only concern."

You sighed and reached up to place a hand on your husband before turning to smile sweetly at him. "Kai, you're being sweet today." You teased him and he scoffed. "Anyway, I know you only want to focus on Kaishi but having other kids here for the first time, other than Ishida, is like his dream come true. It took me a lot of time to get on the parents good sides. It took a lot of time for them to want to bring other kids around Kaishi because if the yakuza affiliations. Had it not been for the fact that you've began working into charity for the city, I dont think anyone would've given us a chance. Bow we have parent friends, and now Kaishi has a chance for an amazing birthday this year. Let's not mess this up, okay? That means NO EXCESSIVE GERMAPHOBIA, and NO ANTISOCIAL BEHAVIOR okay?" You drilled it home at the end. He sighed in annoyance. "Ugh fine. I'll try to conversate with the other scum as if they never insulted the yakuza before. You had better be lucky I appreciate you and Kaishi at this point or this wouldn't be happening." Kai complained before pulling his medical mask down and kissing you lightly on your lips. "You two are being icky again. I'm going to tell Grandpa on you guys." Kaishi's voice brought you two back to reality. "Oh hush, and mind your business." Kai said as he ruffled his son's short hair playfully. Kaishi giggled and swatted the gloved hand away. He took a seat at the kitchen table next to Kai's laptop and peeked over to see what was on the screen. While you went to fix him some oatmeal, his father bolted to the seat and slapped the laptop closed. "No peeking. Havent you any manners?" Kai fussed lightly while Kaishi smiled. "Its okay daddy, I already know you two are planning my birthday for tomorrow." The boy said proudly. "That may be so, but it doesnt mean we cant at least surprise you with the decorations and food." Kai explained. You placed breakfast in front of Kaishi and sat down with your boys. Pops had just entered the kitchen at this point. "Family breakfast? Dont mind if I do." He smiled and took a seat next to you. "Grandpa, what will you give me for my birthday?" Kaishi asked excitedly. Kai flicked his cheek. "Dont be rude brat, respect your elders." He scolded him as Pops laughed. "Oh calm down, Chisaki my boy. My grandson is very calm at this age compared to how you used to act." Pops said with a smirk as you laughed and Kai blushed lightly with embarrassment. "Anyway, my Grandchild your gift will have to remain a surprise until tomorrow." Pops winked and Kaishi groaned. "Aw man. Well, mom/dad? What will you get me?" He turned to look at you in anticipation. You put a finger to your chin to think for a second. Then you snapped and made an 'Ah-Ha' expression. "I'm going to get you a fancy suit! Maybe I'll get some toys too. Just maybe, you'll have to wait and see." You teased him and he smiled. "Daddy, what about you?" He looked at Kai for an answer. "Just like Pops said, it will be a surprise. However, I'll take the time now to ask you what you want as a gift from all of us. It'll serve separately from the gifts we'll get you so dont worry." Kai watched his son expectantly as Kaishi searched his little mind. Seconds later he piped up excitedly:

"SMOOGLY!!!" He shouted happily and raised his arms dramatically in the air. You and Pops laughed while Kai tilted his head in confusion. "Smoo-what? Are you well? Are you speaking in tongues???" Kaishi giggled at his father's confusion. You turned towards Kai to explain. "Kai, Smoogly is a character from Kaishi's favorite show. He's this giant lollipop that dances and sings. Yknow, kids love that stuff." Kai stared at you for a second before nodding. Then he turned his attention back to Kaishi eating breakfast finally. "Alright then, you want Smoogly then that's what you'll get." After breakfast, Kaishi went to call Ishida on the phone. You monitored in awe, gushing as your baby talked to his little crush over the phone. The two were fast friends, and she was the first/only child in the class to accept and support Kaishi to the fullest degree. Meanwhile, Pops went to the backyard to water the flowers and feed the Koi in the pond. Kai headed out to the car to call Kurono/pick him up. "Chrono, I know I've given you the off day but I need a favor." Kai spoke on the car wireless phone while he drove. "Yeah man, what's up?" Hari answered from the other side. He was currently face deep in a 3rd bag of chips as he reclined on his sofa. "The brat's birthday is tomorrow and it's his first big one with other parents and children expected to be there. He wants some actor there to perform or something. Some thing called Smogie or Smothly or something like that."

"OHHHHH!!!! You're talking about Smoogly!" Hari shouted excitedly, his voice boomed over the car speakers. "Yeah whatever that mess is. Anyway, help me track him down and I'll give you tomorrow off to repay you from today. You can also have some leftover cake." Kai offered him. "Bet!" Kurono answered shortly before hanging up and getting ready. In moments Kai was at his door to retrieve him. The two men drove around for a bit while Kurono did some searching online. Lucky for him, it wasn't that hard to find Smoogly's booking information. "Found it, Kai. It says here that we can email and make a down payment, or call the home offices for a response in about...14 days." Kai almost slammed on the breaks. "14 days??? No that's not possible for a booking that could be denied. My Kaishi's birthday is tomorrow. We need to get this Smoogly there as soon as possible." He felt a bit of panic set in. Kai would never forgive himself if he couldn't get his son's biggest wish for his birthday. "Hey man chill. We'll just go to his office and speak to him directly. I mean, we've got a little pull when it comes to money. Also, we're yakuza so..."

"I know what you're thinking Chrono, and the answer is no. We cant push too many buttons or we'll end up leaving the gray area in which we operate in. I cant afford to get arrested on Kaishi's birthday." Hari rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Whatever man. Just take a left onto the main freeway and we should reach the exit in like 30 minutes. After that, we just follow the main road for 4 more minutes, take a right at the stop light, and turn off the Broadway drive. Smoogly's office should be right between a steak restaurant and a car dealership." Hari explained the directions. Kai nodded and the two were on their way. Once they made it to the offices, they took a number and sat in the waiting room. The wait wasnt uncomfortable to Kai...it was the old man across from them that kept coughing that made him uncomfortable. He felt hives pop up on his arms. Luckily the two were called before he went insane! Only minutes later they were standing before a chubby man smoking a cigarette behind a desk. He had dark hair, and was balding right in the middle of his head. His skin was just a step away from being super pale (no doubt because he had the costume on a lot) His noticable feature was the large mole on his cheek. He was clearly a foreigner from some city somewhere, thanks to his accent.

(!!!Reader, think about Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force!!!)

"Alright, what can I do for you two men? Wait a minute, you two are the tax guys right?"

"Uhhh, no. No we're here to inquire about an opening to hire you? The pay will of course be-"

"Yeah yeah yeah. Pay doubled blah blah. I've heard this a million times before. I get bastards like you that come in here every single day asking to pay extra just so I can come to your event. The moms are even worse since they also think they're entitled to my services." The chubby man interrupted Kai. "Please. It's my son's birthday. You see, this birthday is special because he's never had-"

"Pshhh...yeah buster, you're kid is special. Just like everyone else that's come in here before you to say the same thing. Bottom line is that I ain't doing it. If you want my services than file through email or take it up with the front desk. Deposits non-refundable if you get denied. Have a nice day." He put out the cigarette and picked up a rather inappropriate nude magazine. Kai looked at Chrono and sighed as if to say Hari can take over. Hari smiled darkly and went to approach the desk. The chubby man hadn't looked up from the magazine as he spoke. "Look man, I said piss off. What, you didnt get the picture the first time or-" he immediately froze and turned his attention to Hari when he heard the click of the gun. When he turned, he was staring down the glock.

Hari spoke up darkly. "Hey buddy, I'm a changed man but that doesn't mean shit is sweet. I've killed a dozen people before and I'm not afraid to go to prison. Either you do my nephews birthday party tomorrow, or we wear your face on a memorial T-Shirt. Fuck is it gonna be? Eh???" The man gulped and shakily reached his finger out to the voice machine on his desk. "Deborah cancel all my appointments tomorrow, I've got a birthday to go do." Hari and Kai smiled when they heard the voice reply 'Right away, sir.' They bid the man goodbye and left the office. The next day, Kaishi rushed to the backyard after taking a quick shower and getting ready. It was decorated beautifully with bounce houses, a splash area, party games, an extensive food/present table, swings, slides, etc. Most importantly, the parents actually showed up with their kids. Kaishi almost cried tears of happiness when he finally had friends to play with. Meanwhile, you and Pops chatted with the other parents until Smoogly arrived to perform. The kids absolutely loved every bit! Every once in a while, the Lollipop turned to look at Kurono standing in the corner, smirking menacingly and daring him to slip up just once. Smoogly quickly turned around and kept performing. At the end of his shift, he was paid extra just as Kai promised, and Kaishi got to take a picture with him. Finally it came time for presents. Kaishi was happy to receive so many gifts, but he was more eager to get his gifts from you, Kai, and Pops (even Hari got him a secret gift at the last minute). Kaishi smiled at the wooden box Pops had given him. When he opened it, it revealed a small pin on a soft cushion. It was shiny and brand new. It was the symbol of the Hassaikai, the infamous flower design. "My grandson, when your father was younger I had given him this very same gift. Please be sure to take good care of it." He gently placed a hand on Kaishi's head. The boy nodded excitedly and passed the box for you to hold while he opened up the remaining gifts. It was a surprise jacket from you to him. It was just a smaller version of Kai's jacket! Plus that suit you promised, and a few other Smoogly themed toys as well. From Hari, he recieved a new helmet for his new bike. Finally from Kai he received a matching mask. With the suit and the jacket, he was the matching embodiment of his very on father (aside from inheriting some of your skin tone depending on your color, my dear reader).

This was truly the perfect birthday.

»—————————–———————————————————–✄

TIp Jar: https://cash.app/$YuTakeyama

[do-lvn]

Fifth avenue

yo yo here’s a little soft fic about my baby gray. this pic made me think of this so enjoy loves! I'm going to quickly dedicate this to Luna for helping me pick out the beginning @rockstardolan

SUMMARY: Grayson works at a coffee shop on fifth avenue, when he meets (Y/N) he tends to become very fond of her over the next couple of weeks.

gloomy was all Grayson could think of to describe the day. it was a Tuesday and he worked a full 9-hour shift. so with only getting 3 hours of sleep due to Ethan staying up till 5 am playing music, he was very grumpy. He sluggishly walked in and checked his name on the old list hanging from the employee lounge.

“Hello, Mr. Dolan nice to see you here so early!” He looked over at John, the employee of the month for the past 7 years. he was always so cocky and Grayson couldn’t stand it. “good morning John, And please. call me Grayson.” he pulled his apron off the rack and slowly walked over to the door flipping the ‘open’ sign on. once he saw the lights start to flash he sighed and walked back over to his station.

He wanted nothing more than too to go back into his car, drive home and curl up into a ball of sleep. he almost fell out but the sound of the bell hung from the door woke him up. he looked up and almost fell over at the sight of you. you walked in with a friend, a cute smile on your face. He had never seen you before with the 3 years of working at the old Cafe.

“Hello!” You chirped up. He fought the smile from his face which only resulted in a smirk. “hi, welcome to Ridgewood, how may I help you?” You looked over the menu, and sighed. “you go first Emily, I got to think.” Emily walked up and gave Grayson a smile, “hi, I’ll take a medium hot chocolate, with marshmallows.” Grayson quickly jotted that down, he looked over to analyze your features as you looked over the menu. (Y/N), c’mon.” you looked down. “Just a small hot chocolate.” he smiled and walked over to the machine.

John walked over, “I got this you take their order.” he looked up to the group of businessmen that had just walked in. he grunted and walked. “How can I help you?”

You looked over at Emily, “okay, he's cute right.” you laughed and shrugged. “Yeah, if you're into coffee men.” she slapped your arm and continued to drool over John. “Here you go ladies.” you grabbed your cup and smiled. Grayson looked up and sighed, he didn't even get your number. (Y/N) he liked the way it rolled off his tongue. He would see you again he knew it.

And was he right, you walked in two days later with the same craving of a Ridgewood hot chocolate. You were alone this time, no Emily. Yet gray did see her, she had come back that same day to get john’s number, he was upset that you weren’t there but even happier now that you were alone. 

“Hi, again. I'll have a small hot chocolate.” he smiled and walked over to the machine this time happy John had the day off, so he could make it for you. He handed it to you and slightly touched your hand. “Thank you, uh..” you trailed off and took a peep at his name tag with a smile. “Grayson, thank you Grayson.” he smiled back. “You’re welcome (Y/N)” you must have looked shocked because he laughed. “You were here two days ago, I don't have that bad of a memory to forget a pretty girls name.” you laughed and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “Thank you, I’ll see ya around.” he waved and watched you walk out. “Excuse me sir.” he shook his head to look at the line of people he had to deal with. “You seem whipped.” he looked at the girl in front of him. “You said whipped? Sure I'll get you some whipped cream with that,” he responded completely dodging her comment. “Uh, sure.”

The next day you appeared again, this time happier than the last. “Hi, Grayson! I’ll take a medium hot chocolate.” he chuckled “oo a medium.” you laughed. “Hey its cold!” he grinned and walked over to the machine, this becoming his favorite thing to do for you. “A medium hot chocolate for you.” you took a sip and smiled, “thank you, you make the best. I'll see you again!” he waved and smiled going to continue taking orders. “Her best friend is hot.” he looked back at John “aren’t you dating her?” he shook his head. “No. but we are talking.” he scoffed, “you're 25 talking to a 19-year-old.” John laughed, “she’s 21. Turns out she met (Y/N) through her brother. They used to date and when they broke up her and Emily stayed friends. It's quite interesting, maybe if you had the balls you would actually ask for her number and hear it from her.” gray ignored him and just looked at you get into your car, “yeah, fuck off John.”

The next week you didn't appear and it started to affect gray, he even had it ready for you one morning, ready to give it to you on the house but you never showed up. He started to overthink john’s words. “Hey, John how are you and Emily. John looked up from the machine “good, I asked her out last week.” he nods, “have you seen (Y/N)?” John chuckled. “Yeah a lot actually, I'll tell her you asked about her.” his eyes widened. “No, no you don’t have to do that.” he nodded. “Whatever you say, dude, now go take those orders, thanks.”

“Hey (Y/N), I’m going out with John. I’ll be back tomorrow.” you nodded. “Sure! Bye.” it had been a month since you set foot in Ridgewood and it had only got colder, and today was a good day to get some hot chocolate. You looked out at the snow falling and smiled. You grabbed your keys and walked outside. It was 5pm only 30 minutes before closing time. When you finally arrived you caught gray walking out. “Hey Grayson!” he looked up and smiled. “(Y/N) long time no see.” you laughed. “I know, but are you leaving?” he nodded. “Yeah, my shift just ended. Why did you want a hot chocolate?” you smiled. “If it's not too much to ask.” he shook his head. “Not for you. What are you feeling today, medium or small?” you grinned. “A medium.” he smiles. “I’ll be right back.”

You walked over to your car and sat on the hood. He walked back out “here you go.”

‘Thank you Grayson.” he nodded “are you doing anything tonight?” you smiled and shook your head, “nope just me and this hot chocolate,” he laughed. “Can I change that? Would you like to go see a movie?”

“Is this you asking me out Grayson?” he chuckled, “I believe so.” you nodded. “Well then, yes Grayson I would love to go see a movie with you.” with a smile he grabbed your hand. “Alright your pick.” you started to think when a car pulled up. “Hey! Gray! Let's go.” he looked at the side of the car and scowled “you got my car dirty Ethan.” you looked over and almost did a double take, twins.

“Would've never expected you to have a twin.” Grayson looked back at you. “Yeah, no one ever does. But um here,” he handed you his phone “I'll text you when I get out of these shitty work clothes, I’ll pick you up and we can watch whatever you pick.” you smiled and handed him his phone back after giving him the digits he wanted. “I’ll see you later Grayson.” he waved and pushed Ethan to the passengers' seat. You laughed as Ethan groaned. “Fucking shit Grayson.” he laughed and drove off. You sat atop your car and finished your hot chocolate in the snow watching as it slowly fell and landed in your lap.

You stayed there another 5 minutes when you decided to go home and freshen up for your night with gray.

Grayson rushed inside and ran to his room. “So who was the hot chick?” Grayson scoffed. “Her names (Y/N) and I have a date with her tonight.” Ethan sighed, “damn looks like you beat me to it.” Grayson ignored the nagging of his older brother and jumped in the shower, wanting to quickly get ready and not take too long.

Meanwhile, you were currently brushing your hair while blasting tame impala, your phone right next to you for that one text you awaited. When it finally dinged with a text from gray asking for your address, your heart pounded.

“Coming!” Grayson fixed his jacket and looked up at the sight of you his heart thumped. “Well ms (Y/N) you ready?” you smiled and got into his car noticing two cups of hot chocolate ready for the both of you.

“So ready.”

[dangertoozmanykids101]

My Very Own Doubtful Guest, Chapter 1

"It came seventeen years ago - and to this day

It has shown no intentions of going away."

---The Doubtful Guest by Edward Gorey

A shiny silver Lexus pulled up in front of a California bungalow, nestled precariously into the western side of San Leandro Hills. The car door slowly opened and an exceptionally tall, lean man stepped out, stretching his hands up so high that he might've touched the heavens if he went up onto his tiptoes. His shirt, already a bit disheveled from driving in the car for an hour was fully pulled free, exposing his narrow waist after such a stretch.

He glanced around at his surroundings, as he continued to stretch his back, twisting this way and that, rolling his head forward in attempt to relieve the lingering stiffness in his neck. A little voice in his head scolded him: 'Buck up, old man! Stop whining and tuck your shirt back in so you don’t look like a hobo.' Meanwhile, a second little voice piped up: 'Or just take the shirt right off. Imagine, old man, how nice a massage would feel for those knots in your back. If you play your cards right...' For the moment, he chose to go with voice number one, and tucked his shirt back in. Voice number two was right that a massage would feel great. But today required diplomacy rather than a Don Juan.

His curly, dark blonde hair was brushed back off his face. His beard was trimmed short and more reddish brown than blonde. Of course, with a couple stray gray hairs invading his chin these past couple years, the beard may look blond again at some point. Or it might at least from a distance, he reassured himself occasionally.

The neighborhood was quiet, with narrow curvy streets that twisted awkwardly between the eclectic mix of houses. The buildings were uncomfortably close together and only set back a few feet off the street. This made it feel more overcrowded than it really was. Luckily most people were still at work, meaning a parking spot was available right out front. In a few more hours, once everyone was home for dinner, the closest available parking spot might be blocks away.

An older woman was working in the yard across the street. She had stopped working to watch as he stretched and unrolled his sleeves before putting his suit jacket back on.

He waved when he saw her, shouting, "Greetings, Mrs. Dixon! Your garden has never looked so lush! I can smell the roses from here!"

As soon as he spoke with that hypnotic British accent and flashed his million dollar smile, it was obvious that she recognized exactly which prince charming had stepped out of that luxury car. Mrs. Dixon's face lit up, as she waved back.

"Well, hello Tom! What a sight you are!" She started walking toward him, already giggling with excitement to see the man.

He quickly reached back into his car, and popped back up with a bright yellow sunflower in hand. Jogging over to the woman, he handed her the sunflower with a slight bow and a warm smile.

"For you, my Lady Dixon. To match your bright and sunny smile."

"Oh Tom. You are such a charmer! Now come down here to give an old lady one of those manly bear hugs. Why have you stayed away so long?" She held onto him stooped over for her as long as he would let her. Once he pulled away, she started rubbing his arms. "My goodness! You have really grown up and out! Heavens to Betsy, Tom! Look how beefy you are now! Last I saw you, you were still just a skinny, lanky boy. Look at you now! I'm going to put you to work, with all that muscle. You just let me know when you have time. I've got a list a mile long for ya."

"Will do, Mrs. Dixon! I'll be happy to help with whatever you need while I'm here." Waving to her, he walked back to the car while still wearing that smile that could melt an iceberg.

He would be happy to help her out. She had always been very kind to him, and generous. She could bake sweets fit for a king, or a Prince Charming, and his sweet tooth was no secret. The table in her home was always covered with cakes, pies, and cookies needing to be tested. It was a task which he happily obliged with raving feedback whenever given the opportunity.

He only grabbed one bag out of the trunk, he could bring the rest of his stuff in later. It was probably best if first impressions implied that he was just here for a short visit. Grabbing the bouquet of flowers from the front seat and locking the car door before glancing at his reflection in the car window, he ran fingers through his hair. It was a curly mess right now, so the motion was more of habit than a genuine attempt to fix anything. Taking a deep breath, a small smile crept onto his face as he finally started up toward the door, one step at a time.

He stood there a moment, staring at the house and gathering up one last much needed morsel of courage. With one last deep breath, he began the short walk up the steep driveway and even steeper steps toward the front porch.

The house looked the same it had ten years ago. Wow, had it really been ten years since he'd been back here? Had it been ten years since they'd even spoken? It was good to be back.

At first glance, very little had been added, changed, or improved. A few new plants out front and a new tree along the side, but otherwise it had the same pale yellow stucco with white trim. The window sills were peeling again. Maybe he could give those a quick scrap and paint while he was here. It would feel good to help out a little. Maybe a little home repair would help mend any broken bridges or residual hurt feelings.

He continued to just stand there, still staring at the house as a few moments turned into a few more minutes. A normal, considerate friend would have called first to ask if they could come visit. But when had he ever been a normal friend, let alone considerate. He couldn't help but chuckle to himself at the thought of how surprised she would be to see him after all this time. He could guarantee it wouldn't be a pleasant surprise at first.

She never enjoyed his spontaneity. In fact, she outright despised things that weren't planned out. That's what made surprising her all the sweeter, wrenching her out of her comfort zone. It wouldn't be any fun if it was easy. Besides, she would soften up and come around, eventually. She always did but until that point, he'd enjoy every moment of riling her up.

He fondly remembered how beautiful she was when she was angry and flustered. Of course, frequently he was the cause. Closing his eyes, he took a brief moment to remember those moments of perfection when she would finally forgive him.

Nerves and excitement mixed and made his heart beat faster. The whole drive from the airport he had imagined how it was going feel to sweep her up into his arms again in a tight bear hug. Yet as he stood there at the door, he just hoped she would still answer it once she realized it was him.

The doorbell still had tape over it. Maybe that was another thing he could fix while he was here. After a firm rap on the door, he waited while shifting his weight from foot to foot. Turning, he took in the view. It was breathtaking, absolutely breathtaking. Even on a hazy afternoon like today, the other side of the bay was still visible.

The view could look so different depending what time if year it was. They had spent so many hours sitting out on the porch, talking late into the night, watching the city lights twinkle, the planes pass over head, and the stars shift slowly as the night hours flew by.

After a few minutes of staring off into the distance, a car driving by pulled him from his thoughts. He turned back to the door and gave another hard knock. This time he heard commotion inside. Several voices shouting at each other could be heard before movement in the window caught his eye. A little curly blonde head with two eyes and a nose peeked out from behind the curtain.

Well, this was a surprise.

__________________

This is a reblog, since I can't find anything in my scroll anymore and Tumblr won't let me search my own blog.

This is also posted on AO3.