#Makes me sad to think that when I go to metropolis I'm going to kill a shit ton of scavs who are developing new tech

[ceramictank]

Artificer mains will make their whole personality about hating scavs, you guys will never understand love

[blubushie]

the undiagnosed autism is BLOOMING in my brain LMAO

Artificer's campaign! A few hundreds of cycles past the events of Spearmaster, our perspective is changed observe the aftermath of a battle in Garbage Wastes. Corpses of Scavengers, scattered spears and, of course, the killer - Arti! She eats a scavenger before going into the next room and finding a little flying drone thing, we call it Sofanthiel:

This guy! It just flies around and follows Artificer. The game advises you to move forward, which you can... technically not do at all and just go back directly into Hell itself! But we won't do that.

Artificer travels with the drone, eventually reaching Five Pebbles' superstructure. Moon's condition is unknown - you can't enter her region at all in Artificer's campaign.

Anyway, Artificer comes into FP's puppet chamber (the room with the little guy) through the access shaft and is given the Mark of Communication. The drone is revealed to be an ID Drone, which ... technically makes Artificer a citizen of the city on top of FP's can - Metropolis.

FP suggests that Arti clears out his city from those annoying ass scavs and Arti (racist) agrees.

The rest of the campaign is...honestly just murdering scavengers in a city. I'm not joking. They're everywhere oh my god

In the ending, Artificer kills the Scavenger chieftain, essentially the king. She then goes on a rampage and becomes the new Chieftain, in the 12th Council pillar, the House of Braids.

Unhappy ending because her slugpups can't be brought back with violent revenge. yup

Instead of more sadness, here are fun facts!

Artificer explodes in water, making her the worst swimmer

If she covers a spear or a random rock in her saliva, they'll turn explosive

Because the city on top of FP's superstructure is so high up, the deadly rain doesn't reach here (the rain is deadly because there's literally so much of it creatures get crushed and drown in floods. Iterators are making too much vapor.), so instead we get nighttime! Which is horrible there's so many scavengers oh god

Artificer's Karma (mechanic added to turn metaphorical skill gates into literal ones. If you die too often you just can't progress the story) is permanently stuck at 1 (Violence), which means she deadass just can't go anywhere. Instead, she uses the killed Scavengers' Karma to open gates! Chad move if you ask me

A lot of peeps seem to think Arti has no impact on the story. And you know what?

WRONG!!!! The Scavengers were in their golden age, they caused singularities and used them as weapons, they started figuring out armor and politics! And then Arti singlehandedly (singlepawedly?) pushed them back into their lowest point! She's important! and is also not good despite being the main character of her campaign

She's also the only slugcat Pebbs likes OK ARTIFICER ERA END. in one ask. shame on me

"Racist slugcat commits genocide" is one hell of a headline

Also I'm heading to a doctor's appointment so keep sending these and I'll read them when I get back!

[shivering-isles-cryptid]

The Curse of an Arkham Psycologist | The Riddler x Therapist Reader

Summary: Arkham Asylum was very careful when hiring their newest psychologist, they didnt want another Harley Quinn case. But all their worries seems to be for nothing when they hired Dr. L/n. Top of his class. Ivy League Graduate. He's their perfect candidate, and is hired on the spot. All their fears seem like nothing more than that, fears. Until they assign him the Riddler.

Request: Yes / No

Warnings: Talks of murder, abuse, and mental illness, graphic depictions of violence, language, multiple sex jokes, incompetent policemen, Batman pining for the reader if you squint

The Hiring Interview

Y/n tapped his fingers on his knee, staring at the three men in front of him. The Arkham Asylum warden, Warden Wright, Gotham City Police Commissioner Jim Gordon, and Batman. Thr three men stared into y/n, which normally being alone in a room with 3 muscular men would have been a dream come true, but not when your in a job interview. "I hope you understand why we have these two with us. We need to make sure the psychologists we hire are up for the task. We can't risk another Harley Quinn." The Warden explained, y/n nodding along.

"Where did you go to school?"

"I graduated from the College of Northern Gotham with a Bachelors in Clincal Psychology, with a minor in communication. I then got my P.H.D. in Criminal Psychology from Princeton. I also recieved an associates degree in Psychology when I was in high school."

"Previous work experience?"

"I worked for 5 years at a therapists office in Metropolis, and spent some time as a secretary for Dr. Quinnzel before she was hired here."

"Do you have any personal connection to any inmates here at Arkham?"

"The Penguin killed my dad, Scarecrow killed my mom, Bane killed my brother, and Mad Hatter tried to kidnap me, but I beat him up."

"So you have experience with these psychos?"

"The same experience as anyone else in Gotham."

"Your medical records say that you have difficulty with expressing emotion. Is there a reason for that?"

"I don't have difficulty with emotions, but if there isnt a reason, I'm not going to show them. Take right now for instance, if I was sad, I wouldn't cry in front of you three."

"You can control your emotions, that's good. These bastards will test you every chance they get."

"I can handle it."

The Warden scoffed, and tossed a file to me. "Prove it. Heres your first patient. I'll take you to him."

Interview 1: Meeting the Riddler

"I'll be starting you off with one of our least dangerous villains. If you stay calm, and solve his riddles, you'll be fine." Warden opened a door, which showed a room with a glass box in the center. Sitting in the box was a man with a question mark on his forehead. He was tall and lean, but you could see the muscle on his body. "Good luck. Cheryl." The Warden nodded to the cop standing guard and left the room.

You sat on the chair standing infront of the cube, holding eye contact with the Riddler. "Riddle me this, Doc. Who spends their time trying to heal the broken, who spends their time trying to get them to say the unspoken. Whos over their head and doesn't know what to do, I'll give you hint, the answer is you." Y/n put a hand over his mouth a chuckled lightly. "Your very smart Mr. Riddler. It was a clever joke." Y/n smiled at him and tilted his head. "Now, riddle me this Riddler." Y/n stood up and began circling the cell, never thaking his eyes off the Riddler. "Who wears green outside of March, who's back is as straight as an arch. Who talks in riddles to confuse the dumb, who does crimes so they feel numb. Who acts like they have confidence, but secretly worry over their incompetence. Who kills and lies to push people away, all because they think no one will stay. Who..." Riddler banged a fist against a wall, anger written on his face, but also fear and sadness. "Yeah, yeah I get it!" Y/n smiled and sat back down. "So, now that we've evened the playing field. How about I ask you some questions?"

Interview 4: Earning Trust

Y/n stared at the Riddler, who was using mashed potatoes to draw question marks on the glass. "I feel like there's a wall between us, Mr. Riddler." Y/n said, a small smirk tugging on his lips. Riddler turned and looked at him with a bored look and blinked before turning around again. Y/n stood up and walked to the door, motioning at Cheryl to open it. Y/n walked in, ignoring Riddler surprise, and sat in the middler of the floor. "Well, now there's no wall. What do you want to talk about Mr. Riddler." Riddler stood up and walked toward the unfazed y/n. Riddler stood above him, staring down at him with a smirk. "I like this view, you should get on the floor more often Doc." Riddler sat down across from him, their knees almost touching. "Hmm, maybe I do. You'd never know." Y/n smirked tapping his pen against his clipboard. Riddler blushed for a second, but shook his head and smirked. "So Mr. Riddler, do you want to talk about your childhood? That seems to always be where the story starts." Riddler tilted his head, that shit-eating grin still on his face. "I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours." Y/n looked at him and shook his head. "If you insist Mr. Riddler. I was born here in Gotham. Raised here too. I had a decent life up till high school, that's when the Penguin killed my dad. Then, the day after graduation, Scarecrow killed my mother. And then, it was my first day at the College of Northern Gotham, and my brother is killed by Bane. And then, 3 months later, the Mad Hatter decides I'd make a good Alice and tries to kidnap me." Riddler tilted his head and scratched his chin. "What did you do?" Y/n smirked, letting out a chuckle. "I snapped his arm in half and broke one of his ribs." Riddlers eyes and smile widened and he clapped his hands. "Ooh, I misjudged you doc." Y/n nodded and stood up. "Well Mr. Riddler, I have another appointment, so we're going to have to cut this short. Have a goodnight." Y/n turned around, but Riddler grabbed his arm and pulled him back. "Call me Edward, Doc." Y/n nodded and left the cell. "Have a goodnight, Edward." Y/n smiled at him before turning around and leaving.

Meeting with the Boss

Y/n sat in the same chair he did when he got the job, staring at the same three people, plus Cheryl. "You went INTO his cell! You could have been killed, he could have escaped!" Commissioner Gordon yelled at y/n, who stared at him blankly. "I earned his trust, he'll actually talk to me now. Getting him to do that is my JOB!" Y/n stood up, holding eye contact with Gordon. "He's right Commish, the Riddler trusts him now. I watched it happen." Cheryl said, nodding to y/n. "It is his job Gordon." The Warden said, putting a hand on Gordon's shoulder. Y/n crossed his arms and started at the Commishoner. "Ugh, fine, go back to work." Y/n nodded and went to leave the room. He grabbed the doorknob, but turned back to them. "I'm not Harley Quinn. I cant be manipulated by Riddler. I will never do something that I don't believe is right just because some guy tries to flirt." Y/n said before opening the door and leaving.

Interview 5: Edward Talks

Y/n stepped into the cell, sitting in the same place he did last time. "Sorry I'm late, the Warden wanted to ask something." Y/n explained and clicked his pen. "Oh it's fine. I wasn't worried." Y/n internally roleld his eye, but smiled back at Riddler. "Well Edward, I told you my story, I think its time you told me yours." Edward turned from the ceiling and glared at Y/n, who was still smiling warmly. Edward sat up in the bed and crossed his legs, staring at the floor. "Well, it all started when I was 8."

When the Riddler was done, y/n was fighting back tears harder than he ever has before, qnd Cheryl was a sobbing mess so they had to send in a new guard until she calmed down. Y/n got up and put a hand on Edwards shoulder, pulling him into a hug. "Riddle me this, Edward. Who has been through to much to be sane, but still has the ability to play his own game. Who is stronger than anyone I've met, and who still hasnt broken yet." Y/n rubbed Edwards back, holding him as he shook but no tears came out. "You are stronger than your dad, or mom, ever gave you credit for. And you are way stronger than you give yourself credit for." They stood there for 4 minutes before Edward pulled away. "Ive got to go see another patient, but I'll be back. I always am." Y/n squeezed Edward's hand and left the room, patting the new guard on the shoulder.

Interview 6: An Unofficial Visit

"Wait outside for a few minutes. I dont want you to burst into tears again." Y/n whispered to Cheryl, who nodded and walked outside the door. Y/n entered Edwards cell and sat on the bed next to him. "Doc? But our next appointment isn't for another 3 hours. Did you really miss me that much?" Edward smirked at him and wiggled his shaved eyebrows. "I have something to tell you Edward. That backstory I gave you, its not all of it. Yes, I'm an orphan, yes I broke Mad Hatter. But there's more to it than that. I'm the one who put my dad in the Penguins path. I'm the one who gave Scarecrow my mom. And I'm the one who threw the rock at Bane, not my brother. My dad beat my mom, so I got rid of him. My mom beat me and my brother, so I got rid of her. And when my brother found out, he was on his way to the police when Bane showed up. I killed my family. And I don't feel bad." Yn whispered into Edwards ear. "Holy shit, you're fucked up." Edwards said, his eyes widening, then his mouth burst into a smile. "I knew you were too good to be true, and you just keep getting better!" Edward said grabbing his face and kissing him. Y/n pulled away and shook his head, turning his body so the cameras couldnt see his face. "I don't want to get fired and thrown in here, so pretend like I just rejected you." Edward's face contorted into anger and he started yelling at y/n, who was already back at the door, looking afraid as he escaped. "I'll be back." He mouthed to Edward, who nodded slightly, but still looked mad.

Another Meetimg With Your Boss

"I told you it was dangerous! Riddler is insane and he could have killed you!" Gordon yelled at you, as you once again sat in front of the 4 people. "I knew he would trust me, I didn't think he would fall in love with me!" Y/n yelled, standing up. "Doctor L/n, it is too dangerous for you to go back to the Riddlers cell." Batman said, putting a hand on you shoulder. "No, I am still going to be his doctor! I just won't go into his cell. Knowing what I know now, I realize that it was foolish of me to enter his cell in the first place." Warden Wright nodded at you. "Was he a good kisser?" Everyone looked at Cheryl. "What, we were all thinking it." Gordon nodded, "we were." Now everyone was looking at y/n, who shrugged. "It just made me think we should give the inmates mints. Other than that, he was okay. I've had better." Gordon nodded, and Batman huffed, following Y/n out of the office. He grabbed his arm and pulled him toward him. "Be careful Doctor. The Joker ruined Dr. Quinnzels life because she thought she could change him. She believed she was getting through to him and it destroyed her. Don't make the same mistake." Y/n nodded and patted Batman on the chest. "Don't worry batsy, I won't." And the he left. 'I won't because Riddler isn't manipualting me. He actually likes me, and I really like him.' Y/n smirked to himself as he left.

Interview 7: The Big Escape

Y/n smiled at Cheryl, patting her on the shoulder as she nodded to him. Y/n sat on the metal chair that he hasn't touched since the 4th interview. "Hello Mr. Riddler. Now, I'd like to talk about the incident at our last meeting." Riddler looked up at Y/n with fury. "You have alot of nerve to come back her after that!" Edward slammed his hands against the door of the cell and Y/n stood up, walking to it. "Listen Mr. Riddler, I just want to know why you thought that was appropriate behavior. Surely you didn't really believe that there could be something between us. I mean, your in a cage, how could we date." Y/n shook his head and placed a hand on the cage door, which made Edward hit the door in anger again. "Shut up! I thought that you could look past that!" Y/n tilted his head to the side ane shook his head. "Did you also think I could look past you being a supervillain, even knowing that my family was killed by villains?" Y/n shook his head, his hand sliding down the wall. "I could never look past that Mr. Riddler. Just like how I can't look past the wall separating us." Y/n said, at the exact moment his hand slid over the button unlocking the door. "Oh, guess that's not a problem anymore." Yn shrugged, pulling a gun out from his jacket and shooting Cheryl in the stomach. "Don't worry Cheryl, you'll live. The female body is amazing. I shot you directly next to the womb, so I missed most if not all your vital organ, and you most likely won't bleed out before someone gets you to a doctor. Lovely isn't it?" Y/n laughed, handing Edward his cane and they walked out of the room, Edward electrocuting and y/n shooting anyone who tried to stop them. They just made it to the main hall, after Edward released Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy, something aboit repaying a debt or something. Batman stood infront of the door, his body in a guarded stance. "Doctor L/n, y/n. Please, what ever the Riddler said to you. It isn't worth it." Y/n laughed, pointing his gun at Batman. "I already told you Batsy, Edward cant make me do anything I don't want to do." Batman grunted and Y/n pulled the trigger. It was empty. "Darling, do you want to give my Riddle Stick a whirl?" Edward said, putting a hand on Y/n's shoulder. "Eddie, not infront of Batman." Y/n joked, brushing some hair behind his ear. "I meant my cane." He said, handing it to y/n who laughed and pointed it at Batman. "Sorry Batsy, you understand what it's like falling for a villain." Y/n said and pupped the trigger, electrocuting Batman and running out of the Asylum with Edward and the girls.

Home At Last

Y/n sat in Edwards living room, looking at all the green decor. "You should call this place the Emerald City, not the Riddle lair." Y/n joked moving into Edwards lap when he sat down. "Very funny darling, I'll have to think it over." Edward said, snuggling his nose in Y/n's neck. "Ah, it feels good to be free. To be able to be myself." Y/n said, placing his head on Edwards shoulder. "I love you Y/n." Edward whispered into Y/n's ear. "I love you too, Edward. Now, how bout we go to your room and I take your Riddle Stick for a little ride." Y/n whispered into his ear. Edward grabbed Y/n's waist and stood up, y/n wrapping his legs around Edward and kissed him.