#LIGHTER I'M SO SORRY PART 2 OR 3 I LOST COUNT

[cheriafreya]

Zenless Zone Zero 🤝 Reverse 1999 *having a cool biker dude in the second phase of the present patch*

[imgoingtofreakoutnow]

An old friend - Part 3

Summary: The picnic has come and so the time to face Anthony on what you discovered, but will everything go as planned?

Pairing: Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!reader

Other characters: Hyachint Bridgerton, Eloise Bridgerton, Penelope Featherington

Words: 3.0k+

Warnings: slight angst (?), fluff, again some yearning

A/n: This has been quite difficult to finish, I had different ends in mind but none seemed to fit well the flow... I hope you’ll like this! Also, I may post other parts in the future but for now, count this as the final one. ENJOY!

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Gif's not mine, credit to the rightful owner

When the time came to attend the picnic in Hyde Park, the day was nothing but perfect: the sun, for the special gathering, had decided to come out of the clouds to honor everyone with its presence and a warm breeze enveloped every figure walking through the gardens or simply resting on the grass with its embrace. Even the London sky didn’t look like its normal self, with no grey clouds all over; just a few white stripes painting the bright blue canva. In other words, the epitome of a summer day.

However, sat under the gazebo playing cards with Hyacinth, Eloise and Penelope, you felt much worse than a rabbit caught under the wheel of a carriage.

"Miss Y/N/L". You turned towards Hyacinth, who was pointing at the cards. "It's your turn"

"Very well..." you sighed, throwing in the space between the four of you the first card that came in your hand. Winning the game was the least of your problems.

You had spent all night rolling from one side of your bed to the other, playing and replaying every possible scenario in your head, looking for the right way to ask Anthony what you wanted to know without sounding too accusatory. Nevertheless, it was hard to face the man when he was nowhere to be found!

He had just a moment to greet you with a quick kiss on your hand - which, you couldn't help, had made your heartbeat rise as a river during a flood - before being taken hostage first of many beautiful debutants, second of their meddlesome mothers and lastly of some old friends from boarding school.

Right now he was somewhere in the park with them, possibly reminiscing of that one time they put black ink in the professor's shoes... or something similar to that, you imagined. You weren't so sure of what sort of jests could boys come up with.

"Miss Y/N/L". Hyacinth's voice reached you again through the bubble of your thoughts. You put down another card. It took you a second after that to realize that Eloise had no cards in her hands anymore, thus making her the winner.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry" you apologised, putting your left cards back in the deck. "I hope you didn't ask me anything while I was lost in my mind"

"Just if you were alright, miss" explained Penelope. "Did you sleep well last night? You look quite tired"

You sighed. There was no sense in keeping that a secret. "Not quite. Some matters just seemed to be stuck in my head and decided not to leave for the night"

Eloise's eyes sparked in interest. "What kind of matters?" she asked, eating a strawberry.

"Nothing relevant at all" you assured with a smile, but from the look on Eloise's face, you knew she wasn't finished asking.

"No irrelevant matter could keep anyone awake for an entire night" she pointed out. "But I know what matters could..."

Penelope sighed. "Eloise..."

"Family matters" she started, raising her index, "and heart matters". She bent slightly towards you with the Bridgertons' signature smile on. "Which does apply to you?"

You scoffed. "Neither, of course". As you lowered your gaze to the messy deck, the rays of the sun felt suddenly more focused on your face than on anyone else's.

"Heart matters, that is!" Eloise exclaimed with a single clap, her eyes smiling brighter than her grin. "Do we know the lucky gentleman who caught your eye? Or perhaps he is from the countryside? Don’t tell me: are you two secretly engaged?"

Before your cheeks became the same shade of wine, a deep voice intruded the conversation: "You shouldn't badger our guest with your inquisitiveness, Eloise"

Your head shot up to meet Anthony's gaze. Even though your feelings towards him were mixed at the moment, seeing him washed you over with a warm, soothing sensation, as the need of his touch grew within you.

Eloise huffed, standing up from her seat, immediately followed by miss Featherington. "You are a bore, dear brother. I have nothing else to say on this matter". Then, taking Penelope's arm in hers, she walked away, already whispering in her best friend's ear.

"Anthony, do you want to play with us?" asked Hyacinth, already preparing the deck for another round.

Anthony smiled gently at her. "Maybe later" he said, pinching lightly her cheek. "Why don't you go play with Gregory now? I've heard he wanted to see if he could find rabbits near the bushes... or perhaps even goblins"

Hyacinth gasped. "Without me?!". She quickly and clumsily got up in her dress and, after a small curtsey to you, she was running on the grass to who-knows-where.

Now that the cover was clear, Anthony laid down next to you, pointing his elbow on the ground to keep himself up. After adjusting in a comfortable position, he sighed, looking in the direction in which Hyacinth ran off.

"Should you think she'd be angry to find out I lied to her?"

You smirked, taking a card from the deck and fidgeting it in your hands. "About Gregory or the goblins?"

Anthony turned to you, raising his eyebrows. "Both?"

You shook your head, giggling ever so slightly. "You, Lord Bridgerton, are incorrigible: lying like this to your youngest sister... what a rascal"

A corner of his lips tilted upwards. "You should not talk like this to a viscount, miss Y/L/N" he murmured. His hand moved to your arm, his fingers stroking your bare skin, lighter than a feather touch and equally tingling. "I would say it was quite improper"

At this words you moved away from him, just enough so that his fingers could only touch the empty space between you. He searched your face but you were still staring at your card.

"I believe we should talk, my lord” you said, your voice still and steady more than what you expected. “However...", you looked at Benedict and Colin, who had just appeared in your sight and were directed towards the gazebo, "...maybe a walk would be best suited for such matters"

Even with his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, Anthony nodded, standing up again and offering his hand to help you. You gently accepted and he pulled you up. Nonetheless your feet got caught in the cover, making you lose your balance and ending up in his arms.

"I-I'm terribly sorry" you muttered, raising your gaze to his and finding him already staring at you. The warmth of his hands, steadying you, got past your gloves terribly easily and you found that being there, pressed against his chest, so near to his heart, was the only place were you wanted to be.

You took a couple of steps back, smoothing your wrinkled dress and taking a deep breath in. His closeness was like opium to you: even the slightest hint and you lost your mind; and unfortunately right now, you had to be present.

He cleared his voice, handing politely his arm to you. "Shall we go?". You nodded joining your arms and moved with him on the beaten pathway.

A few minutes passed in complete silence, as you tried to find the right words to start. Apart from sporadic pairs walking the opposite direction, you were the only ones strolling in the park at that time of the day, when the sun shines so bright it could make the blood in your veins boil; only birds kept uninterrupted their concert.

"Are you upset because I didn’t honor you with my presence all morning?" guessed Anthony, raising his eyebrows. “Trust me, I would’ve gladly spent more time with you than with any of my other acquaintances”

You shook your head, a smile gracing your face. "Certainly not, my lord: your family was very kind to me in your absence" you assured him. "Besides I'm not upset... I just want answers to what I've heard"

"And what, pray tell, have you heard?"

You moved your gaze from his; there was no way to sweeten the pot. "I've heard that, in certain circles, you are considered a rake; and" you added, before he could stop you, "that you've been spending time with various women last season, opera singers from what these rumours told me"

"And you believe these rumours, miss Y/L/N?". His voice didn't show any emotions but his muscles were tense as an arp string.

"That is why I'm asking you, my lord. I wish to believe it a lie, but your actions yesterday, as appreciated, had boldness in them... quite like Sir Feversham's"

Anthony stopped in the middle of the path, his jaw clenched. "Don't compare him to me, I am nothing like him”. His dark eyes seemed coal ready to be set on fire. “I would've never forced you into anything-"

"I know". You squeezed gently his arm against your side. "I know that, Anthony. Nonetheless, I’ve been wondering since last night if you consider me just as one of those opera singers and you’ll leave me alone like you did to them: my honor undermined and a broken heart to fix..."

"Do you really think I would do something like that?"

You raised your eyes to meet his. The lump in your throat, seeing the hurt look on his face, triplicated. "Haven't you done it before?"

Anthony clenched his jaw again, avoiding your gaze. Many emotions crossed his eyes before he closed them for a moment. Then, after giving a quick look all around, he started guiding you towards an almost hidden path through the hedges.

"Where are you taking me?" you asked, confused and slightly frightened by the sudden change of course.

He glanced towards you with his lips curved. "You did want answers, didn't you?". When you nodded, Anthony slid his hand in yours. "Then there is absolutely no need to worry, miss Y/L/N, I can assure you that" he whispered, preceding you in that natural maze.

As you followed him, jumping over ponds of mud, protruding roots and avoiding overhanging branches, it felt for a moment like you were back in one of the fantasies you two came up with as kids, exploring the deep amazonian jungle in search of a lost civilisation or a hidden temple behind a waterfall; you couldn't believe they belonged to such a long time ago...

The hedges surrounding you ended abrubtly, opening on a clearing that looked like an illustration from a storybook: the grass, kept perfectly cut in the rest of the park, reached knee height there and, in between the stems, flowers popped out in the vivid green, their bright colours catching your eye.

However what left you mouth agape was the modest pavilion in the centre. Its classic columns, with ivy crawling around them, had almost invisible cracks on their surface, and the marble, if once polished, was now covered with a thick layer of dust and dead leaves. Still, even so neglected, its ruined beauty left you speechless.

"How... how did you manage to find this place?" you asked in a whisper, your fingers caressing the tall grass as you approached the pavilion.

"In the most common and simple way”. At your confused glance, he smiled mischievously. “Hiding from my mother"

“You even hid from your mother, my lord?” you smirked.

“Everything to escape her matchmaking schemes” Anthony laughed before a sad smile appeared on his lips. “Nevertheless, it was years ago, when I was still allowed to act as a foolish young man, from time to time”. He left your hand and started unbuttoning his tailcoat.

As he took it off to put it on the marble bench, your gaze wandered on his shoulders and down his arms, framed by his tight waistcoat and usually concealed under that thick layer of blue velvet.

"Shall we start?" he asked, gesturing for you to sit next to him.

You took a seat and noticed how Anthony was wringing his hands, his body again all tensed up. Without uttering a word - it was his time to speak - you took his hand in yours, stroking your gloved thumbs on his skin.

"I must say" he started, "that the market’s gossip is quite accurate... but still not enough to be a reliable source” - then, after a sigh - “because yes, I am a rake - or at least I can be consirered one - and yes, I spent most of last season at the opera house. However, unlike what those women told you, my only company was one beautiful and indipendent lady, whose name I’d rather keep unknown"

He looked at you, almost asking for your permission. "Of course, my lord, I understand". Anthony nodded thankfully before letting his tongue on the loose.

He told you everything you needed to know, his gaze fixed on nothing, eyes lost in memories that you could only try to picture in your head. Every emotion he’d felt in the past crossed his face as he spoke of every step of the affair, from their first meeting to their very last goodbye. You saw how difficult was for him to remember that latter part, even though months had passed since then. After all, no love can ever be truly forgotten.

"Looking back, I’ve realized only recently that she broke my heart just as much as I broke hers" he admitted, his gaze falling on your joined hands. “She deserved much better than the transitory pleasure I was able to give her... I still slightly regret what we could’ve been, but there’s no use in mourning the past”. He stroked gently the palm of your hand. “I’ve found the present to be an unexpected and more appreciated bearer of happiness”

You blushed as his eyes set on you, a welcome sincerity lighting them. However, there was still something, in a deep corner of your mind, that wouldn't let you enjoy the moment completely.

"Thank you for telling me all about it, Anthony" you said, watching him trace abstract figures on your hand. "But I do have one last question"

He moved your hand to his mouth, placing a kiss on your covered wrist and lingering with his lips on that small spot. "You can ask me anything, Y/N"

After a deep breath, you fixed your eyes in his. "What am I to you?"

He furrowed his brows, confused. "I beg your pardon?"

"I do believe you fancy me" you started, looking away and fidgeting your hands as you spoke, "but I can't quite understand if your intentions with me are honorable or if you're simply using my company to your likings"

Anthony shook his head. “That’s nonsense, I would never-”

"Then do you intend to propose to me?" you asked, a rush of boldness flowing in your veins. “You know me, more deeply than any man I’ve ever met, and I found myself drawn to you in a way I’ve never experienced before... and I believe you feel the same”. He stared at you in silence. "I thought you wanted to marry as soon as you found a suitable lady..." you added, his stillness making your heart ache. "Am I not enough to be your wife?"

"Don't". Anthony cupped your face, his hands warm on your skin. "Do not say something like that ever again. You are not only more than enough, but more than I could've ever hoped to find... your intelligence astounds me just as much as your beauty hypnotizes me and I do believe you shall become one of the most accomplished Viscountess of Bridgerton that ever walked this Earth"

As his words beat in your mind ritmically with the pounding of your heart, you held your breath. "...but?"

"But I've rushed things in the past and burned everything I'd built to the ground, myself included. I don't want to make any mistakes with you, and if that means doing things properly, then be it". He stroked your cheek gently and you unconsciously leaned in his touch. "I've lost you once and I surely shall not make the same mistake twice"

You smiled, tears menacing to roll down your cheeks at any moment.

"Don't cry" he whispered, leaving a light kiss on your forehead and you laughed. His lips were as soft as you pictured them in your dreams.

"Don't mind my wet eyes... I'm just- I've never felt this happy before"

He smiled, placing one hand on yours. "Let's hope this will never change then". You nodded, smiling even wider.

So, as the sun went down and the wind kept blowing, you stayed there, talking, laughing, making up for all the lost time, in that little clearing out of time, and you wished you could stay there forever...

“We should go now” Anthony got up from its place. “It’s getting dark”

Making your way back in the reality it felt like waking up from a long, sweet dream, one that makes you wish you could sleep forever.

Your carriage was already waiting you at the edge of the park. Anthony helped you get into it as the gentleman he was. “Goodnight, miss Y/L/N”

“Goodnight, Lord Bridgerton” you smiled down at him, your hand still in his. “And thank you for the wonderful day”

He smirked and kissed your knuckles lightly, lingering again on the same spot where he kissed you for the first time. “The pleasure was all mine, my lady. I shall see you soon”

“Of course” you whispered not capable of even breathing. Anthony smiled, letting go of your hand as a footboy closed the door of the carriage. Then the coachman incited the horses and you were off in the night.

Resting on the soft pillows inside, you sighed, your eyes fixed on the stars outside the window. “Until next time”

Tag list: @lady1505 @truly-insatiable @littlemissbridgerton @anthonybridgertonsmistress​ @chaoticgirl04 @xceafh @latekate1807 @peoniarose @bridg-09 @michael-loves-chickens​ @beckachicago3​ (tell me if you want to be added or removed💗)

[kyotarou]

text me now - part 8

previous | masterlist 

title: end of the line; the start of something new

warnings: fluff, angst, cheesiness, mild swearing, making out

word count: 1.1k+

special notes at the end (be warned it’s pretty long)

It felt like the whole world was on your shoulders, pushing you deeper underwater. You couldn't breathe despite the crisp air, your lungs aching with every breath. What would be comforting silence was unbearable, especially when Tendou's eyes refused to meet yours, a hint of a scowl hiding beneath his forced neutral expression. It was a bad idea to invite him out, but he did agree to this. You sat on the soft grass of a park near school, watching the shiny blue ripples of the pond rock back and forth. Spring was supposed to be a time of clarity, but your mind was more muddled than ever. The sweet scent of fresh blossoms made your head spin and your stomach churn. More than anything, your heart felt heavier with each passing second. You were unaware Tendou shared the same weight as well.

With you beside him, he was at a loss for words. He was stuck in a cave of his unspoken thoughts, unable to see the light. He wasn't sure where to start or if he had the courage to speak. He pondered on Semi's words, cursing him for clouding him in that air of mystery. He glanced at you, chest growing tighter upon seeing your pained face. Could he fix things? 

Tendou took a deep breath.

He turned to you and all his thoughts slipped away. The words weighing on his tongue disappeared, leaving him with a blank slate and a frozen mind. You looked perfect like this, the slight flutter of your lashes as the wind kissed your cheeks, your fingers entwined in your lap—how he wished it was his lips on your skin and his hands tangled in yours. His cheeks grew hot in adoration and shame. He couldn’t believe he nearly let you go.

"(Y/N)..." Tendou immediately bit his tongue. He hadn’t mean to say that.

You turned toward him with a pained smile. "Yes, Satori?"

He could've melted right then and there. His name sounded so sweet on your tongue, so soft and fragile. You treated it with delicacy, a treasure to cherish. He wondered if you'd ever say it like that again.

He looked away. "I... I'm sorry."

"For avoiding me."

It wasn't a question, but rather a statement you both knew the answer to. Tendou was sorry for that, and he was sorry for himself for being blinded by his jealousy and rage. He hurt you and you still stuck with him. He was still hurting you now, refusing to give you any hint of the storm brewing within, all his feelings encapsulated in his fragile body, forcing their way out.

"How do you put up with me?" Tendou crushed a handful of grass. “I’m a piece of shit.”

Your eyes widened, brows furrowed in shock. "You’re kidding, right?"

Tendou let out a harsh scoff and shook his head. Of course he wasn’t. He’d rather you push him away, scream at him to leave, than have you toy with his heart. He wasn’t cut out for love, but he was than willing to try for you—no, with you. The question was, did you want that?

Of course you did, but he was oblivious.

Tendou gulped. "I've been terrible to you, (Y/N)."

"You're far from that."

"(Y/N)-"

"Satori." He jumped when your hand landed on top of his, gentle but firm. Despite your warm smile, he saw how frustrated you were. "Stop saying all those things about yourself. You’re a hell of a lot better than I am.”

His lips parted in shock, throat becoming tight while your grip loosened. You looked up to him—it made his chest swell with pride, but he also felt worse. You left him open to your next attack. You stretched him thin, made him soft, cradled his heart in your hands. You had the power to change him, to either create or destroy something great. Tendou had no means to defend himself. What could he do now besides listen? 

You made him vulnerable. You made him happy. You made him feel loved.

The storm inside him was beginning to creep through, the first sign being his thumb wiping the stray eyelash on your cheek. You saw everything—the regret and agony swirling behind his eyes, the slight quiver of his lip. For the first time, Tendou would no longer try to block anything or anyone; he'd bare all his feelings for you.

You let out a shaky breath. Your body had gravitated towards his, shoulders pressed against each other. He sensed the hesitation and fear behind your next words. "You're my first love, Satori. I want you to be my only love."

Tendou lost himself in your gaze, drowning in the endless adoration. Your noses were almost touching now, and he could feel your breath on his cheek. His line of sight flitted to your parted lips. He found himself leaning towards you until his skin was on yours. You kissed him, a wordless conversation shared between two pairs of entwined lips. Tendou didn't need them; his body did all the talking. Your hands snaked into his hair, his gently gripping your wrists. Your kisses were intoxicating, slow and passionate, and leaving him to ache for more. It was ten times sweeter than the accidental kiss now that he knew where your heart lay. 

The storm had finally escaped, but rather than a violent downpour, it was a ray of warm clarity and sunny skies. Your bodies felt lighter ten times than before, the tension on your shoulders lifted. You fit so well in his arms as did he, like the final piece in a complex puzzle. His movements continued to grow bolder until you lightly pushed him away with a grin, forehead resting against his.

A heavy fog clouded his mind, but one thing was clear; he could do this for the rest of his life. He was speechless but satisfied, a grin tugging at his tingling lips. Tendou already craved the feeling of yours on his, and he longed for when he could do it again, though he knew it would be soon. The four words that followed after solidified the warmth that spread within, a sense of content and harmony in his previously nerve-wracking day. 

“I love you, Satori.”

His arms wrapped around your waist to pull you against his chest. He didn’t mind if you could feel his thumping heart. If anything, he wanted you to—only you could make him feel this way. Tendou was glad his guesses had been wrong for once. Your heart belonged to him, and his to you. 

He kept his nose pressed against your cheek, smiling. The tips of your ears grew hot when he placed a featherlight kiss on your jaw, all ounces of shame and uncertainty washed away.

"I love you, too, (Y/N)."

“So-” You murmured against his temple, fingers slotted between his. “Turn this into a real date?”

He grinned. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

a/n: okay...where do i begin? i started this smau back in january after i reblogged a fic title game and an anon sent in “text me now with a member of shiratorizwa.” i chose tendou and thought it was a cute idea. i even said that it’d be a great smau but had no intention of doing anything with the idea, until @theuntamedmulti reblogged and said she wanted this potential smau to exist—and out came this series.

tbh i was really excited but also hesitant. the last series i tried to make when i first started my blog ended up being deleted and discontinued. i’m really bad at completing series in general, so to have this one be a success is a huge accomplishment for me.

i remember finishing all of the smau parts within a span of 2-3 days (which is why some of the timestamps are set in january lol).

as cliche as this sounds, this series has a very special place in my heart. i am very thankful that so many of you enjoy this smau, even if it’s quite short compared to several others. thank you so much for your support. thank you to the anon who sent in that ask, this couldn’t have started without you. thank you to vivian, aka @theuntamedmulti​ for giving me that little push to start this.

i love you all <3

taglist (closed): @zozodreamy @theuntamedmulti @tsukkim0on @elianetsantana @dekustowel @aideen00 @justfandomlover @rogueofbullshit @giogama08 @squiddlie @captaincyberqueen @kutozume @nachotrash @ems1des @ish-scribbles @salty-satan @darkmbti @rintarosslut @zbops @dumbb1tc4 @candyyrushh @ro-ro-noa @aghasetzen @fi-chanwrites @tobiosaphrodite @panflowerlii @shinah-satoru @lucacangettathisass @maneazuasahi @bokutosbabyowll @fantasycantasy

series completed.

[undercoverclover]

No Matter Where...

Part 1

Genre: N/A, in this part...

Pairing: Eventually.... Chan x Original Character

Warning: N/A

Summary: Liliana’s vacation with her 2 best friends ends up being a trip to remember. 

*Flight to Seoul now boarding*

"Do you have your passport?" Anya, my best friend asks.

"Uh...yes?" I started checking my jacket pockets nervously.

"Liliana! You just had it!" She says as she glares daggers at me.

"I do! I found it!! And why in the world does my jacket have so many pockets?"

I'd never get on the plane at this rate.

I look to Anya and we grab our carry-ons.

"You guys ready?" Ria, my other best friend asks, coming up to us with a huge smile on her face.

"Only one way to find out." I smile back at her.

I checked my phone one last time and put it away. "Here we go."

We head to our terminal and then head to our seats once we're let in. Anya on my left, Ria on my right.

"Do you think we've learned enough to make this work?" Anya asks me worriedly.

"I sure hope so." I say wiggling in my seat, trying to breathe.

"I have never been so excited to meet the ground again in my life!" I say anxiously as I step off the plane, "I could kiss it, I'm so happy."

"Oh, Liliana, stop being a baby." Anya says laughing at me.

After grabbing our bags and heading out of the insanely packed airport, we stood there.

"We made it. I made it." I smile excitedly. The girls nodded happily.

The amount of people trying to get a taxi was a mess and the language barrier was hard to handle for Ria.

"Ria,I told you, you should have studied with us…" I glanced at her with an 'I told you so' smile. A few seconds later, we realize we’ve already lost Anya. The panic in my throat was about to burst.

"Ria! Liliana! This way!" Anya calls from the taxi she had managed to snag and we rush to join her.

After arriving at our hotel, we finally get into our room and drop our bags.

"Oh my God! I'm so exhausted already." Ria dramatically falls into the bed and puts her arms behind her head.

"Says the one who slept 85% of the way there," Anya says sarcastically.

"I did not! Liliana! Tell her!" She looked at me and all I could do was throw my hands up.

"I'm not in this conversation… sorry"

"Rude much?" Ria scoffs at me and laughs.

Since it was our first day there, we decided to explore close to the hotel. We got ready and were waiting for Ria, but she was taking too long in the shower.

"Ria, we're leaving in 10 minutes!" I quickly yelled through the bathroom door.

"10?! Ugh! Fine!!" She aggravatedly yelled back.

10 minutes later, Ria was still in the shower, so we yelled ‘bye’ and Anya and I left.

We walked in the quaint little Starbucks. It wasn't huge by any means but it was cozy. A few booths lined the wall, a few tables and chairs scattered as well. My temptress though, the display shelf. The snacks always looked so good! We walked up to the counter and ordered.

Behave Lili, you have done great losing this weight. You don't want it back.

"Starbucks being so close is a godsend!" Anya states, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"I agree. This latte is amazing." I nod.

Ria was running behind like usual. I glanced at my watch and decided it was time to call her.

"Hey! I'm on my way to you. I'm about in the elevator, I'll be there soon!" She answers.

"Okay, okay, hurry up."

"Okay but will you go ahead and order for me?" She asks sweetly.

"Oh god, what do you want?" I respond sarcastically.

"Hmmm...maybe an iced caramel macchiato?" She suggests.

"Fine, but I'm not as good as Anya in Korean. You owe me." I laugh through the phone.

"Yes twin, I always do! Thank you, I love you. Be there soon." Saying 'i love you' back, I hung up with her.

We're not really twins, but we might as well have been. Or triplets, if you count Anya.

"Hello, could I have an iced caramel macchiato?" I order.

"Okay, sure." The cashier takes the money from me and I stand to the side and wait. I watched as Ria walked in a split second later and started searching for us.

Spotting Anya, then myself.

Noticing I didn't have her drink yet, she chose to come and wait with me.

"Sooo, how was your shower?" I smile.

"Oh great!" She says sarcastically, "except I was told I had 10 minutes until we left! You know it takes me longer than that."

I smiled and busted up laughing.

After that, her drink arrived and we went to sit with Anya again.

As we were tidying up in order to leave, we talked about the night ahead. Standing up and grabbing our things, Anya just stops.

"Guys, look." She whispers, smiling.

As we sneak a peak around, there are 4 incredibly good-looking men that walked in. Particularly good-looking, was the one with longer blond hair and it was half tied up.

"Liliana! Quit staring!" Ria said knocking my arm and some function back into my brain.

"Sorry?" I say shocked at her tone. Then I see the anxious look on her face and instantly know. "Okay, which one do you not want to notice you?" I asked, smirking at her.

"What do you mean? I just don't think it's nice to stare." She really can't be trying to play innocent right now...

"Ria, really? Really? Do you think that'll work on me?" I shook my head at her, disappointed. "Fine! The one that came in last, okay?! Happy now?" She said, hiding her face a bit.

I glanced back quickly to take a look at him again.

I had to admit he was attractive, just not quite my type.

He was taller than me and a few inches taller than Ria and rather muscular. This guy had such milky white skin, amongst black hair and his eyes were a cute lighter brown compared to his other 3 friends. What really stood out was his lips, they were tinged red like he had just had a cherry lollipop, but you can tell that was his natural color.

"Ah, okay, yeah… he's definitely your type." I say, looking back at her and grinning.

Anya? She was definitely eyeing the blond guy. He was tall, not muscular like the other guy, but you can tell he had muscles, he was just leaner. Brown eyes and an eyebrow piercing.

Yup, definitely our type.

"Are you 2 ready to leave?" I asked before Anya gets the nerve to go up and talk to the 4 of them.

"Yeah, I guess so." She says as she fake pouts at me.

"Alright, if you guys wanna wait outside for me, I gotta go to the restroom."

They nod in agreement and head towards the door and I, in the opposite direction.

Headed back out to meet up with them, I take my phone out and make sure I didn't miss any calls.

I really should learn how to watch where I'm walking.

As I was about to open the door, I ran into someone and knocked both phones from our hands.

"Oh!! Excuse me." I say in Korean, praying silently it wasn't one of the four guys from inside.

"It's okay. Excuse me as well." He said.

I bent down just as he did by mistake and once again, clumsy Liliana for the win. We knocked heads.

"Oh! Sorry again! I'm really so sorry! I'm such a klutz." I apologized and he just laughed in such a high laugh while grabbing his head. I couldn't help but to laugh. I bent down again and picked up both phones.

Finally, looking up to see the man's face for the first time, I almost dropped our phones once more.

[sciapod]

Winter Scenario

Creature in the Woods

Part 1 Part 2

Paring: Tom Hardy x Female OFC (First person POV)

Summary: A fairytale visit to Tom’s secluded cabin in the woods

Warnings: Mainly fluff, slight mention of smut. If you’re under 18, close your eyes then, yeah?

Word count: 602

Inspired by @henrythickcavill's ask in this post and @captainbigdy commenting “winter scenario”. I jumped at it. Sorry it took such a long time, sweetheart! Forgive me – better late than never <3

Special thanks to @madbaddic7ed and @littlefreya for beta reading+editing!

Please leave a comment/like/share if you enjoy it. <3 Also, I’d love to hear if there’s a particular thing you like about it! Thanks in advance. Now, enjoy!

_____

Later, I woke up, startled. Did I hear something outside, or was it just a dream? 

Tom is still lying behind me, arms wrapped securely around me and his deep breath tingling in my ear. 

Outside, the sun is emerging from behind the woods. Golden rays make the freshly fallen snow sparkle in glorious colors. Tiny snowflakes fall softly like glitter in the still air. Then I hear the sound again, branches cracking – something, or someone is walking around out there, bustling in the pines. With windows all around and no curtains drawn, anyone could look directly in. 

"It's just a stag, love." 

Startled that he is awake, I sit up and turn around. His eyes are closed but he's smiling sweetly, causing my insides to melt. 

Shaking the mushiness off, I ask, "How do you know it’s a stag?" 

"I've been watching it for the last hour or so, walking around on the other side. It lives in those woods."

“Okay … ”

It is his cabin, after all. He's had it for years. If anyone knows about the wildlife in this area, it would be Tom. 

He sits up and draws me closer, letting me lie back against his chest. Then he adjusts the blanket to better cover me and wraps his arms around me. 

Just as I make a move to kiss him, he says, "No no, sit still. It'll come by again soon, if you want to see it, but you have to be still." Slightly annoyed, but also intrigued to see if it's true, I settle. His body is hot against mine, and I wonder how much he must be burning under the blanket. 

My patience is about to run as dry as my cunt is wet, when Tom squeezes me and says, "Ssssshh," pointing discreetly to our right. I turn my head as slowly as possible, and then the most magical, magnificent creature emerges from the trees. It’s a huge stag with antlers like the ones I've only ever seen in fairytales. It walks forth, oblivious to its spectators, majestic and obviously the king in this region. The two of us just sit in silence and watch as he gracefully passes the bird feeder, sniffing it for a few moments, then walks on, vanishing into the woods again, on the other side of the cabin. Snow is now falling in thick flakes and the only traces of him are the tracks in the snow which will be covered and lost within the next hour. 

We sit for a while, as if frozen, completely in awe of the magnificent beast who just graced us with its presence. 

Some moments later, I picture my body and Tom’s like an icicle, merged together. Solid, but melting infinitely slowly in the golden beams of sunlight, gravity pulling us down. I feel heavy. 

Then, as if rekindled by his deep exhalation, the ember in my core flares up to an internal bonfire and the last traces of ice in our limbs evaporate. I feel lighter instantly. Once again, I'm able to move. 

"Can I turn around now?" I say cheekily, looking over my shoulder. His face is gleaming with pride. "Sure, if you want." I turn around immediately, straddling him and locking my arms around his neck. I kiss him hungrily, then pull back. "That was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. Or encountered. Thank you, Tom." Before he gets to reply, I kiss him again. I press my lips against his, and grind my fiery sex against his. Then my tongue meets his, and his sex enters mine.

_____

Part 1 Part 2

Masterlist

Thanks for reading!

Tag Crew: @littlefreya @thiccgeralt @madbaddic7ed @henrythickcavill @captainbigdy @the-winter-witcher @heelsamizayn @leylaxhanusa @dancingwendigo @radaofrivia  @wondersofdreaming @hell1129-blog @fuckoffbard @randomlikesmaybe @henryfanfics101 @breannaiscool1234 @henchry @stars-meets-the-sunlight @mary-ann84 @sweetsistergingerspice @laketaj24 @brexrif @kursed @supersweetstache @grungyspacepirate @0palder0s @fucking-hell-cavill @miscficsilike @iwastornsincethestart @viking-raider @sebs-daybreak @peakygroupie @agniavateira @magdelen69 @iloveyouyen @carlya65 @corpsesolo

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist <3

[ritchieblackless]

[Ranking Of Cozy music eras]

Well, as many of you know, Cozy did A LOT of things with many musicians and playing different styles. He appeared on at least 66 albums and counting another session work, some hidden works (Like Supertision and Ballroom Blitz) in total is nearly 90 things that he did! (that's why it took me so long, I had to listen to all again) but always one era will be better than other so... at the request of @thespiritofvexation (and I wanted to because is a excellent idea) here are the ranking of Cozy music eras.

Note: I'll try to be objective about this but also you'll get my opinion.

9. Whitesnake.

(As you can notice, Cozy's solo album is there. I put it because is in same era. I did this with all Cozy's solo albums 'cause the poor boy didn't have the time to make a proper solo career... he didn't like that very much anyway.)

Well first thing I'll highlight about this work... is the fact that his drumming is plain, so plain... for being Cozy Powell. You know, Blues rhythm, one bass drum and tomb with a little bit of cymbal... plain. But it's alright because the album needed that type of drumming (Not pun intended of course) I'm just saying that his drumming is so plain because the songs (Blues/Hard Rock) needed that, otherwise, it would have sounded a bit Rainbow-ish. Remember that Cozy was so versatile. He had a strong style but if the song needed the opposite of his style, he was going to do it.

Whitesnake era for me is not his best but LIVE. He on stage was another story. He was amazing.

Songs with Cozy's signature: Hungry For Love.

A side from Whitesnake we have his solo album which is one of his best works. Octopuss was a successful album. We have his mix between classical music and his drumming which is mind blowing. Hard Rock tracks like The Rattler, Formula One (Good one, Cozy) and Princetown and one ballad (Because he liked... a true sweetheart.) Dartmoore.

8. Michael Schenker Group.

His work here is what I like to call "Angry Drumming"

He didn't get along with Michael Schenker so they were fighting everytime. So all he did in this only album with MSG he did it angry... that's why is so good. He was "in mourning" trying to get over Rainbow so he had no better idea that making his drumming sound Rainbow-ish (I can relate) taking advantage of the situation that MSG was a heavy rock band. Not Rainbow, but still. There are a lot of Cozy's fills and Cozy's arrangements on the songs too more than Whitesnake.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Attack Of The Mad Axeman, But I Want More and Feeling Like A Good Thing (Live). 

Now, a side from MSG we have his second solo album. Tilt have jazz-fusion songs like Cat Moves. A  rock tracks too like The Blister and Hot Rock. And with some funky thing like The Right Side with another ballad (Because he is a sweetheart) Sunset. Tilt was an anti-commercial album with a nice success. Also, the album have two “Dark” songs which are Living In A Lie and Jekyll Hyde (Inspired of course in Mr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde... Cozy’s favourite book... such a nerdy.)

7. Brian May Band.

We know how important Cozy was for Brian May’s solo career and Brian himself... (But I’ll not going to talk about this now, because I’m focused only on his drumming.)

Basically Brian told him “Be yourself, I don’t need a type of drumming” So that is what you listen when you listen those three albums... a free, happy Cozy. So powerful as always and creative. Of course Cozy had to be powerful because he was trying to cheer Brian up (He is so sweet). Believe me when I say that this is his best work in his last days! Its amazing the heavy-hand that he still had. For moments you think that you are listening Rainbow by the power of his drumming and the songs are completely stunning. 

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Cyborg, The Guv’nor, Resurrection, Rollin’ Over.

Now, his solo album. The Drums Are Back was not a successful album with bad reviews saying that Cozy was recycling himself. I personally don’t think Cozy was recycling himself, I just think that he had his own way to do songs and make albums.In spite the bad critics and no success, the album was top ten in Japan.. HA! The Drums Are Back have really groovy songs like The Drums Are Back, Legend Of The Glass Mountain (He really never got over Rainbow..). Rock songs like The Rocket and Ride To Win. And three ballads (Because he is a sweet-... well you get it) Battle Hymn, Cryin’ and Somewhere In Time.

6. Peter Green Splinter Group. 

This album is a proof of Cozy’s versatility and still young drumming. 

He and Peter Green got along really well so their chemistry was reflected in the music and live performances (Unfortunately a very few with Cozy) Yeah, the whole album is basically blues, okay? But the thing is that Cozy, no matter how slow the blues was, he would let you know that was him playing the drums.And I need to say that: HE PLAYED BLACK MAGIC WOMAN WONDERFULLY... (just that, back to the point). 

Peter didn't tell him how to play drums in Fleetwooc Mac’s songs, Cozy just did it and he did it fantastic. Also, his drumming sounded so young, so strong and with presence. Its mind blowing really because you don’t expect Cozy at the age of 50 playing strongly but he actually did. He did his drum roll thing with just one bass drum, he was still so noisy as always (I’m so sorry just this era puts me soft)  

Songs with Cozy’s signature:Homework, Going Down. 

And his solo-... oh... right... *Runs to bathroom to cry*

5. 80s Work.

 Well, time to time (For not saying always) Cozy liked to participate in his friends’s albums when he had a little free time with the band that he was in at the time. I did this 80s work section here because I cant believe that amount of things that he did while he was playing in other bands (I mean, u r for real?)...I put the most popular ones but out there are a lot of unknown Cozy works in the 80s with several bands. I just felt that his 80s works deserved a position in the ranking. This is another proof of his versatility but, with a little of his style of course. 

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Tender Babes by Jon Lord, Night Games by Graham Bonnet, Slow Dancer by Rober Plant, Believe by Tom Galley (Phenomena) Shakey Ground by Bernie Marsden, Running from The Storm by Gary Moore and well.. ETC (and many many etcs)

4. Black Sabbath

This is when Cozy turns his “Beast Mode” on.

I don’t know why, maybe because he knew what Black Sabbath was (Tony: Join my emo band.... Cozy: okay) and what it needed..? because that is his normal drumming..? (I'm sure that is his normal drumming.) But he literally blows your mind in every- fucking *wheezes* song. The three Black Sabbath albums are filled with unexpected Cozy's fills (No matter how many times you've listened to those albums, he is unexpected.) His beat is very heavy and very exact too. He was a fan of Bill Ward so I'll be not surprised if he tried to get that heaviness! (I mean, Cozy has his own heaviness but what I'm saying is that maybe Cozy wanted to make a proper Black Sabbath sound) 

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Headless Cross, The Call Of The Wild. Basically all TYR and talk about Forbidden is forbidden... (I’m joking. Is a good album too)

3.Jeff Beck/ RAK 

Well, for start I put them together because when Jeff Beck Group disbanded, the following year he signed a contract with Micky Most and RAK. So, he was a secessionist, a well-known secessionist. He was in the circle for someone who needed a powerful-jazzy style. It’s like the 80s works really (omg Cozy get a grip). He was a really demanded drummer, everyone wanted him and he eventually worked with everyone. He had a very well-known beat by that time, you easily can tell was Cozy but he also had to be more open to the different styles that he was asked to play (Basically he can’t play like him all the time). He also had some discredited stuff, like Ballroom Blitz by The Sweet (It’s so obvious) and Superstition by Steve Wonder (I know, I know that it says Stevie played everything BUT NOT IN THIS CASE DON’T BELIEVE HIM. What you hear in the song is Cozy playing.) and more like some Suzi Quatro’s songs.

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Ballroom Blitz, Superstition, Cosmic Wheels, Band Of The Salvation Army Band by Tony Ashton and Jon Lord.

Now his solo stuff: Here comes his baby, his household, his precious treasure, his (okay you get it) Dance With The Devil single. It’s a friendly instrumental which they did for a laugh but it became seriously successful... (Yes, they didn’t mean to do it but they did) Micky Most ask to Cozy if he wanted to be a single and Cozy said yes thinking that it was not going to be a big deal but *BUM* 1 Million of copies sold (Literally Cozy stayed at home two days laying looking at the ceiling because he can’t believe it) Of course they did the Dance with the devil part 2 which is Man In Black but it didn't work as well as the first one.They did Cozy Powell’s Hammer but it was kinda a fail too although the band had several tour dates. 

This is when Cozy met his lost brother (okay no) This is when Cozy tried his best to play good jazz but instead came up this.. jazz fusion-rock-weird thing. So the thing here was: Jeff didn't know how to explain Cozy what the wanted him to play and Cozy was getting mad about it (Jeff: You can do ta.. tatada tss, ts ts ta da ta... Cozy: Honestly Jeff wtf?) so he did what he thought was better for the record and Ta-Da! Rough And Ready was born. Cozy’s drumming is a bit lighter and he uses a lot the cymbals for a swing-jazz rhythm.  

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Going Down, Ice Cream Cakes, Situation, Short Business.

2. Rainbow.

(Omg Martina are you fcking crazy????) Yes I didn’t put Rainbow in the first place...A new hope for Cozy (This sounds like Star Wars movie or something)

Okay, this is one of his best eras because he was all recovered of his disappointment in music business in 1975. He literally gave up with music (poor babe) until Ritchie called him (Ritchie: Join my emo band... Cozy: okay) . He was ready and decided to show that he wasn't a poor drummer... and he did.He played all his tricks, he was so unpredictable and powerful. He actually was lead drummer (I’m not sure if that exists) He didn't played with the bass like a normal rhythm section, he played with Ritchie. Cozy live with Rainbow was so unbelievable, like the unexpected fill in Catch The Rainbow, Man On The Silver Mountain... To be honest, the first Rainbow album sounds so plain without Cozy, it’s like.. something is missing (Basically Cozy changed the band). His beat is so heavy, strong and incredible.Also his 1812 Overture which is just mind blowing. He was a happy Cozy in Rainbow, that’s why he played so brilliantly (and he was Ritchie’s goal friend... what is better than that?) Cozy did an amazing job in Rainbow... (No words...)

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Stargazer, Run with the Wolf, Mistreated (Live), Lost In Hollywood, Eyes Of The World, Gates Of Babylon, Light In The Black, All Night Long and.. all.(Literally all)

Now, his first solo work: Basically he had nostalgia for Hammer and the press still had bad relationship with Cozy saying things like “He is just Dance With The Devil and nothing more” so Cozy want to make an album so fantastic to shut them up. He called to his friends and all was ready... but they needed a bassist so Cozy took his chance and asked Jack Bruce if he can play in his album (Cozy was such a Cream/Jack fanboy.. he was almost his male crush lol.) Fortunately for Cozy, Jack said yes and they recorded it. The album had a fantastic success, extremely high success. The album had fantastic songs like Theme One (Courtesy of George Martin), The Killer, El Sid, Heidi Goes To Town and one sweet ballad (Sweetheart) The Loner (Dedicated to Jeff Beck... That is actually very cute). 

1. ELPowell

(ARE YOU JOKING?????) No, i’m not joking and i’ll tell you why. Also this is when Cozy became a prog nerd. 

The only one reason that I chose ELPowell as best Cozy music era instead of Rainbow... it’s because he stepped out of his Comfort Zone. This is the REAL proof of Cozy’s versatility. He did amazing things in Rainbow yes but in the end was rock and roll... This is different, this is progressive rock (I don’t really care about Progressive people’s discussion about 80s progressive rock... I’m talking only about Cozy) and Cozy didn’t know a THING about progressive and he still did it amazing. Of course, he took what Carl did and he simplified it to carry it to what he can do... and he did it very well. He had to learn all the ELP’s songs studying them (That’s when he accidentally listened to all elp discography and some Genesis, Yes and well... he became a nerd) He started to experiment with new percussion instruments that Carl used before.. (Like those bells that you hit them with a little hammer... no? okay) He became a KONG BOY too. He literally learned a whole new drumming style but of course with his Cozy sound. Tarkus played by Cozy is amazing, and when he is doing the Congas in From The Beginning kills me every time (That tank tee and those muscles...) and those drum solos...(Damn) they are really something else. And this is the same case of Rainbow.. he was recovering from his disappointment in Whitesnake so he was so enthusiastic about playing with Keith and Greg.  

Songs with Cozy’s signature: Touch and Go, The Score, Mars the Bringer of War. 

THIS IS THE END... GOD this took me an eternity and I explained so much i’m so sorry this is not going to happen again. This is the first and the last time that I’ll make a large post! (For my own mental health) This is so large, I didn’t mean to, sorry! Nobody will read it to the end but I don’t care... and if you do thanks very much this costed me two nights <3 (And sorry if there are any grammar errors) 

[sugarkanemontgomery]

Snapshot 10 pt.6:The Separation of Spouses

Been awhile ha. I’m trying to devote myself to finishing this before the summer is over, and I start pharmacy school. I’ve only posted two updates on fanfiction.net, but I realize this story started here, so it should finish here as well. Happy reading!

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Hey, I just wanted to call to say goodnight!

Penny bites the inside of her cheek, trying to tamp down on the forced cheerfulness. I know it's late, but I was hoping you were still up, she explains. Missed hearing your voice.

The last statement exits with a cringe as Penny taps the phone annoyedly at her cheek. Clingy much? She thinks.

Oh, hey! I'm sorry I forgot to call. The reply is breathy and ragged but devoid of Callie's patented sleepy rasp. I'm um…I lost track of time with Sofia and packing and everythin—

Penny interrupts forgivingly. Oh no, no Calliope, I-It's okay. You don't have to explain. I just wanted to say how much I can't wait for you both to be home. Penny pauses, tugging at the loose threads of the comforters and humming.

The apartment is so empty without you two. She settles on the statement with a laugh, hoping it doesn't sound as awkward as she feels. In response, Callie mutters an abrupt hold on. There are a few seconds of shuffling, muffled voices, and footsteps before Penny finally hears the tell-tale creak of a door closing shut.

We've missed you too. The words are clear, but Penny can't help but note the sound of cars in the background. Is Callie outside? At 12 in the morning?

I think New York is really starting to take its hold on us. Callie's laugh is too quick. Panicky. Sofia can't stop talking about seeing Maggie again either. And I never thought I'd actually miss Mcreary's annoying sex jokes, but I don't know, he's grown on me. Actually, now that I think about it, he's like an older, blonder version of Mark—

Are you outside? Penny can't help but ask, disrupting Callie's rambled reply.

Ah, yeah, I wanted some air. It gets stuffy in Arizona's apartment.

Penny furrowed her brow at the response but didn't know exactly what was wrong with it. Oh okay. So is Sofia asleep or are both of you still late night packing?

There was a delay before Callie answered. Sofia's having a playdate at Meredith's, so it's just me right now.

Really? Where's Arizona? Penny purses her lips trying to recall the muffled voices she'd heard earlier. She wasn't sure if it was a man or a woman, but it sounded like Callie was talking to someone. Maybe it was just the TV. Maybe it was Deluca.

Oh um, well yeah, Arizona's up, so I guess she counts. The laugh Callie releases is weird and strained. Penny's stomach clenches. But she's not helping me pack so I just, you know, excluded her.

What's she doing then?

Looking over some case files.

Hm…

Penny doesn't know what else to say, but she doesn't feel assuaged by the conversation. If anything, she feels slightly more on edge. Callie's being strange. Or maybe she's projecting because Penny herself is being strange. Maybe her jealousy is making her suspicious of things that aren't suspicious. So what Callie went outside to speak to her privately. There's nothing weird about that.

Hey babe, I was actually going to bed soon…

Penny takes the hint reluctantly. Well…okay. Call me when you make it to the airport! I love you!

I love you too.

-/-/-/-/-/

When Callie walks back into the apartment, she finds Arizona sitting on the living room couch, an unlit cigarette between her fingers.

As soon as the door shuts, the blonde jars, shoulders tensing as her wide eyes meet Callie's.

Those things kill you, you know… Callie says it because there's nothing else she can think to say.

I-I-I know you're mad. Arizona slurs, stumbling up from the couch in an uncoordinated heave. And I know you want to yell at me, but I-I really— I can't handle it right now. I'll cry. She sways unsteady on her feet as she moves toward Callie. The orthosurgeon focuses her gaze, noticing for the first time the shininess of Arizona's eyes and the wetness of her cheeks.

I know we kissed. I mean, I kissed you? The blonde's face contorts in thought. Or… you kissed me? She bites her lip, fiddling with the Marlboro like she's trying hard to concentrate on the previous events but just can't. After a moment, she shakes her head as if doing away with the confusing train of thought completely. What am I saying!? Who cares who kissed who! Arizona flings her arms out in exasperation which immediately disrupts her balance and sends her toppling forward. Fortunately, she's able to right herself before she tips completely over. Callie watches with reluctant amusement as the petite woman folds her arms across her chest in a flaccid attempt at seeming composed.

The orthosurgeon exhales, examining the other woman before settling on a response.

Where'd you even get a cigarette from?

Arizona reddens. I-I keep a pack just in case, and I know what you're going to say, she raises her voice as if to override any impending chide from Callie, But this is the first one I've had in a longgg, long time…Scout's honor.

She flashes Callie a three-fingered salute and a nervous smile. Besides…can't even find the damn lighter.

At this, Callie guffaws, walking into the living room and plopping onto the couch. She keeps laughing until she feels a weight settle beside her. When she turns she finds Arizona staring at her. Pale hands reach up to wipe at her cheeks, and Callie can't restrain the flinch. Is she crying?

I'm sorry the blonde says, continuing to wipe the tears. Her countenance is sad yet contemplative. I don't know why I'm like this. I'm happy you're with Penny. She states like she's trying the words out, seeing how they fit. After a moment, she smacks her lips distastefully. No, that feels like a lie…

Callie's body tenses beside her, but Arizona can feel the words bubbling up. Severe and unstoppable.

I think maybe I am the complete opposite of happy that you're with Penny. I think I feel Arizona pauses grasping for the right word for a minute before finally finding it angry…at you. I think I'm angry at you. And I know that's not fair and you have every right to live your life. But I'm just so mad. I'm mad that you found someone new and fell in love and flew to New York an-and moved on because I haven't. And I'm not. Arizona is no longer wiping tears. She's just cupping Callie's face and staring, and the taller woman gets the distinct feeling that the blonde is admitting something to herself for the first time.

I thought I was. I thought I was getting over it and learning to be myself again…without you…but I'm not. The only reason I'm even functioning is because of our phone calls. Before then, I was a wreck, you know. I didn't even want to get out of bed.

Callie doesn't say anything; she doesn't know what to say. So Arizona just keeps going, her gaze zipping around the room nervously.

And it makes sense that I threw myself at you and ruined the one thing keeping me sane. This is what I do. I self-destruct. Of course, I kissed you. I can't even stop thinking about you. I can't ever leave well enough alone!

She covers her face with her hands and folds into herself, and Callie can see the first waves of a sob rippling through her shoulders. Callie begins to reach out but thinks better of it. Her hands fold in her lap. She turns away.

I don't…feel that way anymore. I love you, and I've missed you. But I don't want…

She doesn't finish. There's a long empty silence where Arizona is looking at Callie, and Callie is looking away.

I'm not asking you to.

Good, don't. Tomorrow I'm going home, an-and I'm going to be happy with the woman I love.

Arizona just breathes, feeling suddenly sober. Okay.

And we shouldn't talk as much anymore.

Okay.

But that doesn't mean I'm…We're still friends, so don't worry. I'm not kicking you out of my life. We just need time apart right now

Okay.

So you can move on from me.

Okay.

Callie glances over her shoulder at her ex and finds a watery pair of blue eyes dull and staring. Okay? That's all?

What do you want me to say? I wish you would have yelled at me, so at least…at least I could argue. At least I could talk about how…I can't remember exactly who kissed who first, but at some point, we were both kissing each other—

Arizon—

But maybe I just found an opening. I don't know. She laughs a wet, sad laugh. Maybe I'm just desperate and manipulative. And you're just horny and lonely, and I imagined that this was even a possibility.

Callie just runs her fingers through her hair and remains silent.

Okay, then. I'm going to bed. Arizona finally says, standing up and sparing one last glance at her ex. Goodnight, I guess.

Night.

-----

Day 104.

Arizona wakes up to an energetic Sofia flopped out on top of her like a child-sized starfish.

Mama! Mama! Wake up! A tiny finger “softly” jabs into her ear.

Fia… Callie’s warning come from just outside the doorway.

Arizona cracks open her eyes and groans at the sudden light and sounds. Off, Sofia she wiggles side to side, and the little girl tumbles over onto the bed beside her.  

Mommy says we gotta go to the airport, and we can’t leave without you. I told her we should just stay, but she won’t listen.

Arizona doesn’t even have to look to know Sofia is pouting.

I—I thought about letting you sleep in, but I know you’d want to take us, so…

Arizona turns over to see her ex-wife standing just outside of the room like there’s a forcefield keeping her out. It’s a small thing, but it’s enough to remind her that last night really did happen. She groans again, but this time for a different reason.

You’re right. Thanks, Calliope. Can you give me a few minutes to get dressed?

Callie nods relievedly before mincing away to the living room. Sofia stays lying on the bed watching her mom hustle to get dressed.

Don’t you want us to stay, Mama? she asks after a moment.

Arizona pauses in her search for a clean tee-shirt before looking at her daughter. The girl is propped up on her elbows, a deep frown contorting her mouth. Arizona pushes all the emotions she’s feeling into the best words she can think of on such short notice.

Of course, I do, Baby. Always! I’d sew you both to my hip if I could.

-/-/-/

Callie, Sofia, and Arizona arrive at the airport at exactly 10:35 AM. Sofia has one small suitcase and a bookbag while her mother has one large suitcase and a carry-on. Her other mother has no luggage at all, so instead chooses to hold Sofia’s hand as they walk—well, jog actually—to their boarding gate. The flight boards at 10:45 AM, and the morning had gone faster than anticipated. Arizona does her best to keep up with Callie’s long strides despite the hangover headache pulling at her temples. She moves her shades up momentarily, so she can see her ex-wife in full color. Her dark hair pulled into a loose pony. Her slender neck sweaty from rushing across the moving walkway. Her tan skin glistening in the yellow light streaming from the tall airport windows.

She hasn’t more than glanced at Arizona this morning, probably thankful for the distraction of traveling. Probably thankful that they won’t see each other for awhile.

Even so, Arizona can’t stop looking at her.

When they arrive at the gate at 10:50 AM, Sofia cries. Sniffles at first and then full-blown sobs.

Mommy, we can’t leave Mama. We can’t leave. She drops her suitcase in a mild sort of tantrum, and Callie looks at Arizona, surprised. Lost.

Baby, you know we have to go back. Don’t y—don’t you want to see Maggie? Don’t you want to tell Penny about your trip?

Sofia glares at her mother, shocking both women, before running hard into Arizona’s arms.

No, she defies

Arizona strokes her little girl’s head, pushing back tears of her own. Please don’t cry, Sweetie. Please don’t.

Callie stays away, fiddling with the seams of her pockets and feeling incredibly useless. Arizona throws her a consoling look.

You know I will see you again as soon as I can, right? She leans down and whispers into her daughter’s hair.

When Sofia doesn’t answer, she asks again. Right?

All she gets is a slight nod.

And you know Mama and I love you, and we only try to do what’s best for you, right?

Another nod.

Then, you should know we’re just trying to do what’s best for you right now. You’ll be back here before you know it, and you’ll have so many more stories to tell me and Zola and all your friends.

Sofia doesn’t respond, but Arizona can tell by the way her grip loosens that her fight is waning. Arizona looks up to see Callie watching on, miserably. They meet eyes and hold what can only be described as a quiet conversation. After a moment, it must become too much because Callie turns away to face the boarding gate. Arizona sighs, swallowing a budding resentment.

Calliope. She calls out softly.

Callie looks over her shoulder to see Arizona’s arms stretched out wide. I think there’s room for one more.

Almost as if pulled by a magnet, Callie glides over into her ex’s embrace. It’s warm and strong and as familiar as always. There’s a simultaneous hiccup in both of their chests when Arizona turns her head and presses her mouth lightly against Callie’s ear.

I love you, and I want you to be happy. That hasn’t changed.

A sob muffles in Callie’s throat as she snuggles deeper into the solace of her wife—her ex-wife. The guilt is so heavy she feels like she’s sinking, and Arizona is the only raft willing to keep her afloat.

After a few lingering moments by the gate, a voice comes on the speakers, calling all remaining passengers to board. The calm is gone. Arizona detangles herself from her family, smiling wearily before waving them off.

Don’t forget to text me when you land.

 -------

Day 105.

I hope your day back was good!

As soon as Arizona sends the text she locks her phone and shoves it into her back pocket.

Okay, done! Are you happy now? April gapes at her friend.

Wow, you really…wow.

W—What do you mean “wow”? Why are you “wow”ing? You told me to text her!

Well, I…didn’t think you would actually do it. April takes a swig from her wine cooler. Technically, they’re celebrating her move into a new apartment with Jackson. But at some point, it also became a pity party for Arizona’s “break-up” with Callie if you could even call it that.

Then why would you tell me—Oh my god. Now, I’m going to look desperate. Am I going to look desperate?

Well, aren’t you?

Jeez, April!

What did you even send her?

Arizona repeats her message to April. Shrugging even though her anxiety is building. The message is innocuous enough, right? …Right? The redhead’s grimace says otherwise.

That’s a…good text. Casual.

Then why are you looking like that? April schools her features into forced indifference.

Looking like what?

Arizona throws up her hands in exasperation before pouring herself a glass of wine. You know what? Forget it. Forget Callie. I’m hot. I’m...I’m sexy. People like me. Tons of people.

April raises her wine cooler in agreement. Damn straight. They’re lining up—

And anyway, I’m happy for Callie. I’m happy for her new job and her new friends and her new relationship with a freakin’ resident who can’t even give her an orga—

Her phone interrupts her with a buzz, and Arizona whips it out so quickly she almost spills her wine. April looks on in anticipation.

Thanks. I hope you’re doing well.

She reads the message outloud, squinting at it like maybe there’s some hidden meaning between the letters.

Thanks, I hope you’re doing well? April repeats slowly, trying out the words. That’s all?

Arizona reads it again. Yeah, that’s all.

 -------

Day 109.

It takes Callie five days to realize she’s probably not going to tell Penny about the kiss. She thinks about it though…she really does.

Every night when Penny curls into her arms, she remembers Arizona’s hands palming the back of her neck.

Every day when they’re in the car scoping out better apartments, she remembers Arizona’s tongue stroking the top of her mouth.

Every time they kiss or make love or even look at each other, it’s on Callie’s mind.  (And what’s worse is that the sex is better, better than it’s been in awhile not that Callie would ever allow herself to make the obvious correlation).

Today, it’s a rare weekend when they’re both off at the same time, and Callie thinks this may be the perfect window to tell her.

Penny, can we talk? She pulls the woman out of the living room (where she’s playing some card game with Sofia) and into the bedroom.

What’s up? Penny bites the skin at the tip of her thumb, a nervous habit.

Nothing…I mean… And in that moment, Callie considers saying so many things.

I kissed my ex-wife a few days ago.

I knew what was happening, and I didn’t stop it.  

I’m so, so sorry.

But instead, the only thing that comes out is You look beautiful today and We should take Sof to the beach.

-/-/-/

They spend the day on Coney Island. The inevitable fallout hovering like a tidal wave.

 --------

Day 114.

Penny is on cloud nine or maybe even somewhere above it. Callie’s been more present than she’s ever been, and the non-Sofia related phone calls have all but ceased. She doesn’t know what happened during Callie’s visit to Seattle, and the brunette never seems that eager to go into it.

They must have fought, she thinks, and is strangely delighted by that. Sure, there are times when Callie looks miserable. When Sofia mentions Arizona and Callie just sort of stalls like an old car, but they are few and far in between. And Penny is sure they will go away eventually.

She’s just really happy with the way things are, and she knows Callie is, too. Callie will be, too.

-------

Day 116.

Somewhere in a Seattle operating room, Arizona watches the light drain from a newborn’s eyes. She presses two fingers against his chest and pushes for what feels like thirty minutes. The dull hum of the heart monitor mocks her from the corner. And she isn’t looking, but she can almost feel the sad gazes of the surgical nurses bearing down. She pulls herself away finally, sweat sticking to her neck and her forehead. She doesn’t want to stop, but it’s helpless.

Time of death 9:24 PM.

-/-/-/

A few hours later, Arizona thinks about calling April or Alex or Richard. She even considers having a heart to heart with Deluca (though he was passed out on the couch when she got home, his left hand wedged into a bag of Doritos so maybe he isn’t the best choice). She scrolls through her contacts, searching, but after surveying her options, she realizes there is only one person she really wants talk to. Her thumb hovers precariously over the contact.

-/-/-/

I watched a baby die today which considering my job, I should be used to. But I’m not. I’m scared I never will be.

His parents are so young. They look like us when we were that young. So afraid and out of their depth.

They brought me the most precious little boy and begged me to save his life, trusted me to save his life. And I failed them.

I know we aren’t really talking anymore because of everything that happened, but…I miss you. Like crazy. All the time. And I’m going to go out on a limb and say that maybe you miss me too. And what we have is too precious to throw away over one night. Over one stupid, drunk mistake. I meant what I said at the airport. I know you said you wanted to it time, but it’s been long enough for me. l really just want my friend back.

-/-/-/

Somewhere in New York, Callie coming out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her hair and another wrapped around her chest. She sees Penny lying up in bed, highlighting certain passages in a medical journal. Callie’s cell is lying on the bed beside her.

Hey, did my phone ding? Thought I heard something.

No. Penny glances up from her notes. Are you coming to bed soon, Babe? I’m getting tired.

Yeah, Callie comes over to pick up her phone, only to see a few article alerts. Let me comb through my hair and change. Shouldn’t take long.

-/-/-/

Hey Arizona, I’m sorry that happened, but I think it’s for the best we don’t talk anymore unless Sofia is involved. Please don’t respond to this message; I don’t feel like arguing, and at this point, the back-and-forth is just getting sad. I want to move on with my life. Please let me.

Arizona reads the message again and again. She feels the air being vacuumed from her lungs. Her stomach floating up and plummeting down all at once. She covers her eyes with her arm and tries to suppress the feeling that’s threatening to overwhelm her.