#Kuu Mukami

[otomeiromylife]

I finished Mashiro Kanoe’s route in Folie Fatale recently, and just wanted to write down a few thoughts into the internet void. This is a route and character analysis. For preface, he was my first route, this post contains spoilers, and heavy trigger warning for dark topics (in hashtags).

Here are my thoughts on Mashiro Kanoe.

When I first saw his description as the ‘kouhai, genius, self harmer’, I was expecting someone more like Azusa Mukami (DiaLovers) But Kanoe was surprisingly tsun! It makes sense why he is tsun and comes across as mean/apathetic. If he has no siblings or friends, a neglectful mother, and gets bullied at school, most of his interactions are going to be negative. I was curious as to why he so adamantly denies being bullied. I think this is because he is so deprived of interaction, that he doesn’t want to limit this into just ‘bullying’, as that label would dismiss the social interaction aspect. As evidenced by his endings (he stops self-harming because he doesn’t want a weak body, or he goes ballistic over being pitied), he clearly is also prideful. He views being bullied as pathetic, and something that makes him a victim, a label that he hates. Also, it could be alike to how his self-harm developed. He grew into masochism as a result of his self harm, so he probably finds it easier to deal with cruelty. Though, I don’t think he enjoys the cruelty, like a stereotypical ‘masochist’. I think he is only a masochist when it comes to physical sensations. I also think he is a sadist which I will touch on later.

I also think that his relationship with his peers is interesting. We don’t see much interaction with his classmates, other than the one bullying scene where they pretty much just call him a weird loser. Natsuki is his senpai, so above him in the hierarchy, and she also stands up to his bullies, so is not influenced by his peers that look down on him. This creates a degree of separation between him and Natsuki, which I think was what allowed their relationship to flourish. I was curious as to why he actually gets bullied. Because of his tsun/kuu nature, he acts in a way that people his age probably find ‘cool’. Because of the advertising of the game being ‘yandere men who go crazy for you’, and Kanoe being listed as 5/5 on the Radical measure on the official website, I was surprised by how easy he was to talk to. His route felt wholesome, even. He is weird, sure (Like when he said he told his mother that he is glad she neglected him, because it led to his self harm which he gets off on^? gets pleasure from.) but I think this is because of the degree of separation, him deeming Natsuki a nice person, and also her being his favourite person. I doubt he is saying things like that to his bullies/random classmates. His relationship to Natsuki’s senpais (Ren, Haruki, etc) is also interesting. He is seen to get very jealous of them. I think this is also because of the degree of separation. He feels like her classmates/senpais are closer to her because of their more shared context. And after he finally found his one friendship, this makes him feel like an outsider again. Also, his pride makes him hate being inferior. Because her senpais are above him in the hierarchy, this makes him feel pitiful and also threatens his masculinity. Which he wants to maintain, especially in his relationship with Natsuki.

Throughout his route, there was a question lurking in my mind; ‘Does he get sexual pleasure from blood/pain?’. It’s never properly addressed, but he says several things that could lead to the conclusion that he does. I wanted to explore that a little bit further. It is stated that he developed his self-harming habit as a way to calm himself down. When he feels his emotions overwhelming him, which he claims happens often and uncontrollably, seeing blood leak from him is soothing. This probably stems from his lack of control. He doesn’t have a reliable mother, which has a knock on effect of making his meals unpredictable, his house a mess, and he has no one to advocate for him. The self harm leads to emotional control, which is the only control he can have. This is understandable. However, he also claims several times that he gets pleasure from self harming. It is difficult to say whether or not he is conflating pleasure with relief. Let’s look at the scene of his first CG. As we discover him cutting himself, he doesn’t seem visibly in pleasure. Rather, he seems to be very emotionally fragile in this moment. He is anxious that Natsuki likes other people more than himself, and he even seems to feel a little bit guilty that he is making her witness it. His line ‘I did already tell you I cut myself, so you shouldn’t be surprised’ comes across to me as recognising the distress that she is experiencing, and reassuring her that it is nothing to worry about. His Unease ending also has a CG which shows wounds on his lower abdomen and wrists. He doesn’t look to be in pleasure at this moment. The position of the cuts is strange however, why are there some right above his groin? This could be because that’s where he thinks will cause the most damage, or possible sexual pleasure, but that seems unlikely. It was just an interesting artistic decision that I wanted to flag up briefly.

His character design can also give us a few hints that may help answer my question. His casual outfit, which he wears on their date, has his blood type written on his jacket, there are blood-filled syringes, and an ocean of blood (not real hopefully) towards the bottom. This definitely shows that he, to some extent, worships/idolises blood. His bloodbag earrings, which he also wears to school, show blood is, for him, a positive (A Positive, if you will). The way he discusses his self harm is also abnormal. It is almost like he is bragging about it. He also has this slightly braggadocios tone when talking about other sad things in his life such as his absent father. This seems strange, as he hates being pitied. But if he talks about it as if it were a point of pride, it becomes a point of pride. In his mind, it gives him ‘cool points’. What I don’t think he understands is how this instead leads to people pitying him. Circling back to the blood topic, I think he idolises blood because of the control and relief/pleasure it gives him. Since he has no other people, he instead worships objects. This is evidenced by his Remission (good) Ending, where he gives up self harm now that he has Natsuki by his side. However, in that ending, he also takes her to a blood donation centre? He also spoke of it as ‘the place where we can feel good’, which led me (and Natsuki) to believe they were going to a love hotel.

The Insanity Ending can also tell us about his relationship with pain. Why I said he is a sadist earlier, is because of how he treats Natsuki here. It is important to note that this is the Insanity ending for a reason, and his actions may not reflect his character in this moment. It depends on whether you think his actions are a reflection of his inner desires, or not. In this CG, he has made several cuts into Natsuki’s body, enough for her bleeding to make the bath water opaque with red. Whereas, Kanoe himself is (visibly) unharmed. This could be because he is punishing Natsuki for pitying him. However, because of his idolisation with blood, he could also have been trying to share his own pleasure with her. Another possibility is that he enjoyed hurting her, just as he enjoys hurting himself. This would make him a sadist. But is this sadism sexual in nature? In the CG, she is naked and unconscious. He is also naked and pressing her body against his own. This is sexual assault. Even if he didn’t intend for it, it is definitively sexual assault. It is unclear what he did to her body whilst she was unconscious, but we know he at least stripped her, and cut her with a knife. It is not definitive, but it is also possible that he raped her. That is what I think is being implied by this scene. I think this shows some element of sexual sadism. This is backed up by the instances strangulation and murder, where he is seen smiling.

It is difficult to answer my question ‘Does he get sexual pleasure from blood/pain?’. Whilst writing my analysis, my opinion shifted somewhat. I now think that he does not get sexual pleasure from it. However, it is complicated. I think his emotional state is very messy, which is clear from his description of overwhelming emotions. I think the line between pleasure and relief is highly blurred for him. Though it is possible that it shifted more into pleasure overtime, I think it is more likely that he is trying to convince himself he receives pleasure, as relief is a less positive emotion. He also thinks that he cannot experience happiness or unhappiness, which is clearly untrue. This evidences that his descriptions of emotions may not be entirely accurate.

Another thing in his route that I wanted to talk about is his trait of being a genius. I do not think that it is written well. However, I do understand that Folie Fatale is a short, indie game, so there was not much time in his route to explore this trait. The only mentions of his intelligence is in reference to his app, or his good grades. The app is very important to him, and it is very impressive that this 15 year old can code, however, does that make him a genius? He is definitely talented, but it is not really shown why he is a genius. Because of his official character description of ‘天才x自傷癖’ (genius and self-harm habit), I expected his intelligence to play more of a role in his character and route. His high grades are also impressive, but I think it would have been better if they weren’t just mentioned in a small, optional bit of text. If he is truly a genius, I think it would have been better if this was shown in his dialogue. I don’t mean he should’ve spoken with lots of academic lexis, but rather, he should’ve had moments where he outsmarts the other characters, or knows things they don’t. Another small criticism I have with his route is that it’s never really explained why he has lots of time off of school? It is in his character description on the official website, but as far as I remember, it’s never actually addressed or explained in his route. Given what his route revealed about his character, it could be that his improper housing led to illness, his app development took up lots of time, he was too depressed to go to school, he didn’t want to be bullied that day, etc. It would have been nice to have some clarification

Despite my criticism, I really enjoyed his route! It had a nice mixture of wholesome and dark, and I just like the guy. He kind of reminds me of myself when I was his age, which definitely reflects poorly on me, but it led to me developing extra sympathy for him. I don’t think he is a bad person, but he is clearly very broken, and in need of a very talented counsellor. The Japanese level was also quite tough. I am an intermediate learner, and I struggled quite a bit with this route, however you never learn if you don’t challenge yourself. It also didn’t feel short for me, because I was constantly pausing to look words up in the dictionary, lol. The game was also cheap. I bought it for £4 on Steam and it is worth way more than that! I am feeling very excited about the future routes, and will be playing Ren’s next. If you are still reading this and you haven’t played the game already, I highly recommend it! Just do it!

There may be some things I missed, due to memory, poor Japanese comprehension, etc. I would be delighted to hear your thoughts and opinions on Kanoe and this game! This game really needs more love in the anglophone community.

He is also just really cute… ♡

[kyaruun]

I saw @madisnorm asking about 5 of my comfort characters and why not, why shouldn’t I clown myself, ty Min \(￣︶￣*\))

It also said to tag 5 people so I would very much love to see @keithvalentinex @ghoul-cowgirl @munarisblog @kisekisnow @lavendel081 doing this too 💖 (No pressure though, I’m just curious dfhdgfdg)

Anyways the list is under the cut so everyone can avoid seeing me being cringy on main lol

Kuu’s absolutely dysfunctional comfort character list (I know it said 5 but I’m a rebel Min ily </3):

Rei Sakuma (Ensemble Stars)

Kou Mukami (Diabolik Lovers)

Childe (Genshin Impact)

Natsume Sakasaki (Ensemble Stars)

Loki Laevatein (Kamigami no Asobi)

Ichiro Yamada (Hypnosis Mic)

I mean this list changes around depending on what series I’m crazy for atm but these few guys usually stay pretty darn consistent sdfjhfghdfjg 

I’m pretty sure Kou and Rei top the list by far, I swear my mind has a switch that flips daily between the two of them?? Is it the ocs I ship with them, is it the fangs, is it that they’re pretty af WE WILL NEVER KNOW but 💋

Anyways there’s a lot more but,,, I’ll shut up now hdfgghdfg Please feel free to come into my askbox/DMs and try to guess what my types are because you’re most likely to get them right :’)))

[kyaruun]

Long Tag

Tagged by @munarisblog Muchas gracias Ariiii ; v ; <3333

Rules: Answer some questions and tag some bloggers you want to get to know better.

Name: Kuu \(￣︶￣*\))

Nickname: Do I even have one asdfghjkl

Gender: Female 

Sexuality: I’d like to know that too tbh

Height: Around 1.68 ish??

Languages: Spanish, English, French a tiiiiny bit of Japanese

Nationality: Spanish

Current time: 19:15

Favorite season: It’ll sound cliche but I really like spring <3

Favorite scent: Soft flowery scents? I don’t really wear perfume so I don’t know ^^;; Also I really like citrics

Favorite color: Blue! Also pastels. All of them.

Favorite animal: Cats. I have an insane obsession with them but I can’t have one ;;

Favorite fictional characters: Wow. Are you ready for the real list lololol I’m sorry that there’s mostly males here hehe 

Ayato Sakamaki / Kou Mukami (Diabolik Lovers), Zelos Wilder / Sheena Fujibayashi (Tales of Symphonia),  Emil Castagnier (Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World), Hikage (Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly), Jed (Psychedelica of the Ashen Hawk), Erza Scarlet  / Gray Fullbuster / Jellal Fernandes (Fairy Tail), Caesar (Ozmafia), Loki Laevatein (Kamigami no Asobi), N (Pokémon), Rei Sakuma / Natsume Sakasaki / Ritsu Sakuma / Koga Oogami (Ensemble Stars), Leona (Twisted Wonderland), Rin Okumura (Ao no Exorcist), Noctis Lucis Caelum / Prompto Argentum (Final Fantasy XV), Luca (Arcana Famiglia), Eijirou Kirishima (Boku no Hero Academia), Ichiro Yamada / Samatoki Aohitsugi (Hypnosis Mic), Haruhi Fujioka (Ouran Highschool Host Club), Kaede Higa (Barajou no Kiss), Atsushi Nakajima (Bungou Stray Dogs)

aaaaaand all my friends’ ocs ccc;

Normal amount of sleep: While studying it goes around 7 hours, on summer and some weekends it’s around 10 hehe

Coffee, tea or hot chocolate: Hot chocolate!!

Number of blankets you sleep with: We’re having a heat wave now so,,, none. One if it gets chilly after midnight

Dogs or cats: C A T S 

Dream trip: Japan!! I also want to see Italy again ;;

Dream job: Videogame developer. Probably a programmer if I’m being realistic hehe

Followers: 304. OH MY GOD. Thank youuu o(*￣▽￣*)ブ

Blog established: August 16, 2016 and this was my first (reblogged) post. The first pic will tell you a lot about myself c:

Reason for my URL: It was pretty much random. I wanted a cute name for my url that sounded soft and hehe I used to use Kuu as part of my name back when I had twitter for like, 2 months so I started making up names that featured kuu or similar sounding stuff. And here we are at kyaruun

Random fact: I love watching seiyuu interviews / live events and programs and I’ve become a huge fan these past years ccc: I’d say my favourite TV program right now is Seiyuu to Yoasobi which I started watching for the dummy head section in Hiro Shimono and Maaya Uchida’s episodes and let me tell you the program is GREAT. There are snipets translated in yt and wow. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried of laughter while watching asdfghjkl

If you read up until here you deserve all the love ; v ; <333 I don’t really know who to tag because I don’t want to bother anyone but pleaseeeee. If you see this feel free to do it and tag me so I can see ccc: <3

Extra: Seeing my favourite characters list, try to guess my favourite type(s) of characters ¿) <3

[kyaruun]

Oc ranting with Kuu: Diabolik Lovers Edition (part 1) because I realized I have too many DL ocs:

Ryo (aka the tsun that started everything)

First girl I ever made who I’m still too in love with and draw from time to time because TSUNDERE RIGHTS

Tries to play it cool and act mature but it’s a tsun hot headed mess after all, so more than half of her relationship with Ayato is butting heads, arguing and Ryo getting into all kinds of trouble bc of it

This girl actually comes from a very traditional Japanese family on her mother’s side and, had things gone the way they should have been, she was meant to inherit her family’s temple in Kyoto

Some family circumstances lead to her having to move in with the Sakamakis and having to be under Ayato’s care who she despises SO much at first because she things he’s a brat just like she is

She has HUGE pride issues and a sharp tongue so,,, yeah the beginning was rly hard for her because she can’t keep her mouth shut and still has troubles with it tbh

She has one step-brother on her father side named Aleksandr who she admires so, so much. She also has two more ““brothers”” who are just,,, close friends with Alek. This is her small family and loves the three of them very much yet none of them are human

She isn’t 100% human either and actually has a bit of Vibora in her but she tries to forget this daily because she’s just... an average human with better blood. That’s pretty much it, yeah.

Yuu (aka the first child Ryo and Ayato had, who is the only good child out of the two)

Big softie. I mean it. He’s SO soft. Like how, you’re surrounded by dumbasses and you’re a vampire ahhhh. Also did I say he’s my fav child because he is

Won’t bite someone unless it’s a matter of dying or a full moon but we don’t talk abt that in this household

The only two things that keep him being a somehow competent creature are his sister, playing the guitar and his closest friends. 

He has a lof of self-steem and trust issues so he stays away from people, human and demons alike, as much as he can 

He isn’t on too good terms on Ayato tho and will take any chance to diss him. He’s so savage with him I swear I even feel sorry for him sometimes. Just sometimes.

Loves his sister a whole lot and is willing to do whatever to protect her and love her and sometimes even scold her when she goes over the line but he just plays the soft big brother role most of the time.

He’s a huge dork but v loveable pls love him and take care of him because he can’t

Saori (aka small Ayato, girl edition and the second and last child)

Everyone was scared because Yuu used to look exactly like Ayato as a kid but that’s cause they hadn’t met Saori yet

She’s the embodiment of the :3c emoji and Ayato’s little princess even if she’s like 16 now

So she thinks she’s a queen and should be treated as such and won’t tolerate getting disrespected by anyone

Can and will convince you to kneel before her and will also step on you with her 15cm shoes because height issues

Probably does that 90′s anime laugh

If you were wondering yeah. Totally an S. But only plays with pretty people because she has ~high standards~

A total bitch but I think she has a heart... somewhere. Yeah I think so. I love my bitchy daughter tho she can get rly soft sometimes

Mizuki (aka v soft pink bean)

She’s this really happy and energized soft bean that works at Kou’s agency as a model and who ends up living with the Mukami & Yui due to ~~circumstances~~

Loves Yui with her whole heart and used to be her best friend when they were kids. She’s hugging her all the time and saying how cute she is and showering her in affection

She’s super dependant on Kou’s validation and has such a huge crush on him to the point she will do anything to see him pleased including getting hurt / bitten

Kou ofc takes advantage on this all the time because she’s such a puppy I swear you just wanna pat her on the head and tell her she’s a good girl

Kou is trying to win Yui’s affection so he just. Ignores Mizu when he’s not interested / hasn’t got a use for her

There comes a time where Mizuki ends up realizing her situation and slowly comes out from her crush, only for Kou to start realizing he kind of misses seeing her around all the time

And he tries to win her over (as a play thing ofc) once again even though this time Mizuki is resisting because she doesn’t want to get played with again

Bittersweet love that will probably have or not have a happy ending c: