#Just drew the body and didn't want to draw a face so I drew Gabriel

[itsyouch]

one time I got sick cuz I was going a bit too crazy for ultrakill

[the-lunar-library]

Cover Design: Have I Figured This Out Yet?

Today let's talk about the cover for my third book, To the Ravens. When talking about the earlier books' cover designs, I made a big deal about how it took actual years and years of trial and error.

To the Ravens did not take actual years and years to figure out how it wanted to look. It was eager to get going. The first cover design I drew for it was the final product.

But I did toss some ideas around before actually drawing it. Like this one.

This very rough cover dates back to January 2019, four years before I actually started writing, only a few months after I'd first begun playing around with ideas for the novel. And before you ask --

She's Akantha. For a long time, Akantha was named Kassiane.

I think the art is by Dante Gabriel Rossetti. It looks like his work, or one of his ilk.

No, I wasn't planning on publishing under Rayless Night. At that point, my first book was still only on its second or third draft and I was debating what name to write under. Rayless Night was just a placeholder.

This wasn't even a serious attempt at a cover. It's very simple, not very exciting, not very specific. As for the title, I didn't shuffle through too many -- I think To the Ravens was the first thing I settled on. (Again, a much easier process than the other two books.) I will say though that the female figure does nail Akantha's anger. She might be about to snap that pansy in two.

This image was more for me to have something to look at and think about in the early days of turning story ideas over. But when it came down to writing and actually facing the reality of publishing this thing, my mind settled on a much more unique and dynamic cover.

Not the cover I ended up going with though.

This was my original idea (a rough version), Akantha gazing up at a cloud spider. There are two scenes with cloud spiders in the novel, and this is supposed to reference the first one.

My inspiration was Greek red figure pottery. And there's a lot I like about this concept. It immediately conveys the Greek-ness of the novel's culture. It shows that the heroine's winged, something I really wanted. And it hints at danger. I kept this concept in my head for a lot of the writing process, but didn't yet commit it to paper. In fact, I didn't end up drawing it until a few weeks ago so I could illustrate this post.

I think it wouldn't have been a bad cover, but the red figure style has a stiffness to it that I started to dislike. I also didn't want so much flat black on the cover. I started to play with the idea of a blue or blue-green background, to contrast the orange and because blue-green has some significance late in the story. The spider and web (I sourced the web from Pixabay) are also kind of unwieldy -- the spider had to be comically shrunk down even to be included. The thing's downright cute at this size, and maybe now has completely the wrong vibe.

Then my dad had an idea for the cover.

Akantha with her wings dramatically raised, cast in shadow before the Earth (also sourced from Pixabay), with her eyes eerily glowing gold. This is a rough approximation, but you can see it's not a bad idea -- it's attention-getting. But I also feel the mood is wrong. It feels more like a comic-book cover.

But maybe it did influence me, because when I got around to drawing the cover, it featured both a red-figure Akantha and a heavenly body:

I'm really happy with this one. I'm not sure the red figure connotation is really there anymore -- I don't know if people look at this and think, "Ah, yes, Greece!" or more just "Ah, an orange demon!" (She is not a demon.) But the color contrast is really pretty, and now Akantha has none of that stiffness. Her wings are visible, and there's the Moon, so you get a hint that there's something alien and different about the story. (My logical father, however, points out that it should still be the Earth in the background, not the Moon, because Akantha lives on the Moon.)

I decided to go with complementary art of Alexandros on the back, with him in gold rather than red/orange.

I really liked the idea of incorporating Harmony the snake, having her link them together.

So that was my much simpler, much easier process. I think this cover's come out the best, particularly in physical copies.

What do you think? Should I have kept the spider?

[dalishkadan]

six sentence sunday/wip weekend

@a11sha11fade and @thedashingcaptainweird both tagged me last weekend, but i didn't see it because i, uh, just wasn't on tumblr. yesterday i attempted to write some feelsy handers sex, but instead got some more domestic type stuff along with a bit of an angsty confession on hawke's part, so. yeah. (i swear, trying to herd gabriel and anders to do what i want them to do is like trying to wrangle a couple of greasy pigs. and given i've actually done that irl, i should know how difficult that is lol.)

i'll tag @warpedlegacy, @noire-pandora, and @lamiahypnosia, if y'all wanna post something. :)

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Parting from Gabriel felt as if he were separating a piece of his own heart, but he calmed its trilling as he offered, “If you give me some time to heat up water for you, I’ll draw you a bath.”

Hawke’s moan was heavenly, a prelude to the evening to come as he conceded. “That sounds wonderful, another ten steps and my feet may very well secede from my body.”

Chuckling, Anders fetched the kettle he’d dropped earlier and refilled it before lugging the tub out of the corner. He let Gabriel regale him with stories as he drew the bath, tales that had him guffawing and smiling so much his cheeks quickly grew sore. He realised then that he’d barely smiled much in the months they’d been separated. He’d simply forgotten what the sensation was like. Now the warmth spread through him, healing over cracks and wounds that he hadn’t even been aware was there before. He owed Gabriel much, truly, and he would spend the rest of his life repaying him. But that was a prospect he would not mind as he finally stepped away from the prepared tub and motioned that it was ready, appreciating his lover’s bare skin as he passed him (though not without a quick peck on the cheek).

Later that night, after Gabriel had thoroughly turned to a prune and they’d shared a meal together, Anders added a few more logs to the fire and stoked the flame, ensuring they would well catch instead of smother. Then he finally submitted to the siren call of the bed, the one that Gabriel reclined on, back against the headboard. Hawke’s grin was slow and steady, the fire reflected in his eyes. He held out his arms as Anders approached, ready to take him into his arms, a pleasurable prospect Anders had barely allowed himself to even fantasise about, lest it never again come to pass. Oh but it did, and a shiver ran through his body to feel those arms encircle him, feel warm skin against his own for once instead of cold blankets. He sighed in both relief and happiness as he felt the barest brush of lips against his forehead, and then Gabriel squeezed him even closer.

Gabriel sighed as he murmured, “I almost can’t believe this is real.”

Looking up at him, Anders asked, “What, kept dreaming of this the whole way back?”

Half-snorting Hawke replied. “Yes. And no …” A frown clouded his eyes as he reached up to smooth bits of hair out of Anders’ face. “I … Adamant was … trying.” Questions laid on the tip of his tongue, but Anders held them all in, allowing Gabriel the silence and the space to say what he wanted, what he needed to say. And he did. “There was a Nightmare demon waiting for us when we fell into the Fade. It did its best to tear open old wounds, but what can it tell me that I haven’t already told myself for all these years?” He chuckled softly, but only seemingly out of habit as his half-smile didn’t reach his eyes. “But then it dug deeper and it found you. And once it did, it didn’t stop dangling you in front of me, offering you either as a taunt with images of your death or worse … offering your safety and well-being as a reward, if only I let it in.” Fingers toying with the hem of Anders’ tunic, he admitted softly, “During the climb up, I must have wondered hundreds of times if I would simply find cold, empty cabin.”

“Never,” Anders interjected, the word both a confirmation of reality and a promise. He remembered well just earlier, when he’d wondered himself if Hawke would ever walk through that door, if he’d ever see him again.

[themadamelibrarian]

Perfect to Me

Rating: Mature Relationships: Gabriel/Sam, Sabriel Additional Tags: Body Image issues. Belly worship. Chubby Gabriel.  Summary: When Sam touches Gabriel’s less than perfect abs, the only thing that goes through his mind is how repulsive it must be for Sam to be with someone like him. Now all Sam has to do is figure out why his angel is shrinking from him before he spirals too deep. If you want to be tagged on future fic postings drop me an ask to let me know you want to be added the Library Card list. People who are over 18 years old and are added to the list legit get a Library card aesthetic. No matter what reaction you may have, like the posts of the fics if you thought they were worth the click. Reblog if you think they need to be spread like flower seeds in spring. And of course, feel free to leave a comment on here or AO3. Tagging: @copperseraphim​ @thenanahunter​ @truxblooded​ @lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell​​

Sam’s favorite thing to do was to take the time to worship Gabriel's stomach. placing small kisses and nibbles as he reveled in how that part of his boyfriend was soft and warm, yet he could feel the muscle under the slight pudge.

Now Gabriel wasn’t shy about most things but for some reason, he was shy about this.No one could blame him for it either. He’d seen Sam naked. He knew what the boy was packing. How could anyone compare to that kind of firm sleekness? 

Squirming, Gabriel tried to think about how Sam's lips felt as they moved over his body, but his mind kept coming back to that squishy bit. How Sam must be repulsed and just paying attention out of pity. 

Sam could sense something was off, so he stopped and looked up at his angel with concern. "Gabe. What's wrong?" 

Gabriel swallowed nervously and looked down at Sam with a forced smile, "Nothing, pudding pop. I'm fine."

"No. You're really not." Sam said as he crawled up until he was face to face with him, "Talk to me. It's okay if you're not in the mood." 

"I'm in the mood. So in the mood. I have all the mood." Gabriel deflected with the deft of a fencing champion while trying to grope Sam back into action. 

Sam stayed Gabriel's wandering hands with a gentle grip to his wrists. "Babe, you're not even hard." he whispered, "Did I- did I do something wrong? Hurt you?"

Gabriel's little noise of surprise at that

Gabriel let out a small noise of surprise that Sam would blame himself for this. Of course, who was he fooling, this was Sam Winchester. Willing to take the blame even when it wasn’t warranted. Closing his eyes, Gabriel shook his head in denial. "You didn't do anything wrong." 

"Then what is it?" Sam asked, settling at his boyfriend’s side and touching the bottom of his chin to turn Gabriel's face toward him. 

Pulling away from Sam self-consciously, he drew the covers up to his ribs and rolled onto his side to bury his face against Sam's chest. "It's stupid. I've watched suns burn out and galaxies born. This is just... forget it. I ruined tonight so you might as well get some sleep."

"Gabriel!" he said, the name sounding harsh in his own ears so he tries again but kinder. "Gabriel. You've not ruined anything other than making me worry.  If you don't tell me what's wrong I can't help you." 

The silence dragged on as Gabriel weighed the options. He could brush off the whole conversation and pretend that it was a passing fancy that distracted him. He could make something up or he could come clean about it. The worst that could happen was that Sam would be so irritated at his lack of confidence that he left. Then Gabriel wouldn't be any worse off than he was a few years ago. Right? That's when he really imagined what it would be like without Sam. Without the thousand-watt smile when Gabriel took him to see some part of the world a Winchester wouldn't ever see by his own means. A life without the presence of the human space heater in his bed. Warming everything until even Gabriel's wings were lax and spread wide for more. A life of perpetual solitude without Sam's loving shadow surrounding him. "It's my stomach." Gabriel whispered, "My vessel. I don't like it and I don't understand why you do either. It's... awful and I can't change it."

Sam was stumped for a bare second before he pressed a kiss to Gabriel's forehead and wrapped him up in his arms. "I'm sorry. If it makes you uncomfortable then I won't draw attention to that part of you but for what it's worth, I think it's beautiful. Just like the rest of you. There isn't an inch of your vessel that I don't find attractive in some way."

"Don't bullshit a bullshitter," Gabriel grumbled. 

"I'm not. It'd insult both of our intelligence." Sam pressed another kiss just shy of Gabriel's ear and whispered, low and sultry, "Haven't you ever wondered why I like when you pull me up against your chest while you're fucking me? It's because I can feel every inch of you against me and in me."

Lifting his gaze to meet Sam's, Gabriel looked for any trace of some kind of deception. Even if it was Sam trying to make him feel better but that's not what he saw. There was the most beautiful man in all of creation looking at him with complete adoration. Pressing their lips together in a gentle, silent thanks for showing him the love he needed. Because he may not be able to look at himself and see something he liked but he could try to see himself through Sam's eyes. Maybe with time, he'd see the beauty that was so apparent to the man.