#Just because I'm a common personality type doesn't mean that stereotyping is ok

[mankatzu]

Ok full post because some f@g dared me to answer every question

here we go. all 50 oc questions about shino. From this post

Do they have any crafting hobbies? - Not really, but Shino does take up watercolor painting post-canon, so that's crafty.

Do they wear perfume/cologne? If so what scents do they prefer?- I don't actually know how common straight up perfume was in this era of japan but I'm positive shino has like, 5 perfume oils on rotation. I actually just found out people would leave their clothes over incense burners to catch the scent so she definitely did that. Shino's "scent" in particular however is pomegranates, it's a part of her skin routine to dry them, turn them into powder and rub them with water over her skin to make it smooth.

Do they enjoy cooking? - Yes more or less, but she is NOT good at it. Like she will poison you if you let her make you bento. like just raw onions in there.

Do they enjoy baking? - Not really applicable since most japanese sweets to my knowledge don't involve stereotypical ovens like most of us in the west do. She enjoys baked food/deserts but just doesn't make it much.

Do they have any tattoos? If so what are they and do they have any special meaning? - She has no tattoos.

If they were badly injured, and for whatever reason couldn't go to a hospital, who would they go to for help? - Her mother and sisters, her teahouse is her safehaven.

Do they have any unusual fears? - Shino is afraid of the dark because . It's not like she can never be in darkness she has to sleep after all but she REALLY doesn't like being alone in the dark. Her kitty zakuro helps with that.

Do they collect anything? If so what and why? - if collecting clothes count, than yes. But nothing significant. She definitely collects gifts from her patrons.

When they're sick what do they do to feel better? - Resting, eating warm food and taking lots of baths.

Do they have any regrets? - Yes. I can't say what because of spoilers but lets just say she wishes she never became an actress.

Do they have any addictions? - Shino definitely becomes how you say, addicted to cigarettes post canon as she originally only smoked a pipe but yknow. its in like the cool and sexy way.

Do they have any sense of style? Regardless of the answer do they believe they have a sense of style? - Absolutely, I mean it's tough because fashion back then wasn't as diverse as it is now but shino is like. absolutely the person to match her kimono colors to the season and find the perfect coordinate each time.

Do they enjoy poetry? - She doesn't write it, but she has a moderate appreciation I'd say.

Do they have a hard time opening up to people? - Yeah, Shino has a hard time shifting out of "customer service" mode when she gets to know people. She usually does it to not ruin her perfect image but if you're around her enough (okita-kun) she'll relax around you.

What kind of sense of humor do they have? Or do they have one at all? - Absolutely, Shino is so fun and has a good-spirit about most things, she's just not like yknow. kevin hart at the apollo with her humor.

Do they have or want kids? - Shino would LOOOVE to have kids. it's just hard with the whole yknow amab gay thing.

How easily would they be convinced to do something that goes against their morals?- It would be hard. Shino may be someone living on the edge of the law technically but if she really disagrees with something morally I don't think she'd do it. MAYBE if it was like "you have to do this to save x person" kind of thing. i.e. trolly problem.

How easy is it to become their enemy? - hard, Shino isn't the type to really hold grudges, like she definitely might not like you but she'll dislike you in a mean girls way not "you're my ENEMY" way. like oh that bitch. that sort of thing

How easy is it to become their friend? - pretty easy, but only if you're becoming like a friendly acquaintance/work friend. Yknow the kind of person you see around often and strike up a conversation with but you wouldn't know their birthday. To become her true friend takes a lot more committed time.

Do they have a strong connection to their culture? - Yes and no? Like I think culturally she's very japanese and loves her own culture but I don't think she feels particularly attached to the concept of being japanese. like she's just vibing. I think like most in this time period until commodore perry and his goons knocked down their door the idea of like. Oh there are others completely different from me? didn't really cross her mind. Exposure to foreign influence in the way of their neighborhood doctor, "Shigu-sensei" (sigfried) has helped, though.

What is more important to them, friends or family? - Easily family. It's a found family but its found family nonetheless.

Would they ever betray someone for money? - Depends on the person and depends on the money and depends on the depth of betrayal... I think generally she probably wouldn't but depending on the amount she'd be very tempted. And if she went through with it she'd feel really bad about it.

How would they want to die? - Soundly in her sleep without any pain. or preferably in the arms of a loved one.

Do they have any enemies? - Nah. maybe someone who thinks she's the enemy but otherwise no.

Do they have a daily/nightly routine? - Yes! Every morning she wakes up early and eats breakfast with her family, and feeds Zakuro. Then she does their family's assigned chores and spends the early afternoon just chilling, might have a nap if she's feeling sleepy. Around I'd say like five or so she gets ready for customers and spends until 11pm or so serving. Then around 12-2 am she helps clean up, has a bath, and then turns in for bed. I'd say like once a week she has to do her little pomegranate ritual to keep herself clean.

stay tuned for part 2 ✌️ I had to split it because of block limit.

[1139thfangirl]

Stereotypes...

Stereotypical ISFJ: bakes cookies all the time, hugs literally anyone, physically can't break the rules

Me: I nearly burned the house down making toast, I will only hug my parents, and I will break rules I think are unnecessary

[penny-anna]

OK people on discord enjoyed this so here is an overly elaborate Superstore daemon AU concept that came to me in a dream last night:

- ok so a concept u get sometimes in daemon AUs (that's not HDM canon afaik) is that it's possible for adult's daemons to unsettle and then resettle after a particularly dramatic life event

- my specific thinking around this is that it's not by any means common but it's also not vanishingly rare? like everyone is Aware that it's a possibility but you could easily go through your whole life and never meet anyone who experienced it

- & obviously what triggers adult unsettling is very very subjective, it's not about how Dramatic the experience is but rather how much it affects your sense of self/understanding of your own personality

- anyway what I'm driving at here is, Jonah's whole 'burned out of business school' experience shakes him up enough to unsettle his daemon

- & like once he and his daemon get over the initial shock & also realise that she's not going to resettle any time soon it's just kind of, embarrassing? like he's a Grown Ass Man with an unsettled daemon and he doesn't even have a good explanation for why. adult unsettling is stereotypically something that happens after major traumas, he can't tell people it happened bcos he dropped out of college, he'll look Ridiculous

- and in particular he can't tell his new coworkers, like it's obvious very quickly that this particular group of people are never going to let him live it down. so naturally he & his daemon just kind of pick a form and pretend that she's settled.

- BUT inevitably somebody's going to see her change when she thinks no-one's looking and then OOPS

- main ramifications of this are 1) people's immediate reaction is to be very worried about him bcos again, this is something that stereotypically happens following major trauma, so he kind of has to explain what happened

mateo: wait so your daemon unsettled because you failed out of business school

jonah: okay first of all i didn't fail out,

dina: you've never had any real problems in your whole life huh

jonah: .......................shut up

2) now everyone is trying to give him advice. it's all Terrible Advice. Sandra is the only one to point out that there's not actually anything you can do other than wait it out but naturally no-one listens to her

3) as proposed by @handwrittenhello on discord: they decide that since unsettling is caused by trauma they have to traumatise him again to get his daemon to settle. people keep popping up out of nowhere trying to startle him. mateo insults him nonstop and jonah is just like why do you think this is traumatizing and mateo is like oh i don’t, i just like to. Glenn very publically '''fires''' him.

- they do give up within the span of 1 episode but are later very vindicated when his daemon re-settles during the tornado

- his new settled form is a ferret which it takes him a little while to come around to

- co-workers even more obnoxious about it once they find out about The Kiss and more or less universally conclude that kissing Amy is what made his daemon settle. Amy & Jonah both strenuously deny this obviously.

- he doesn't immediately tell everyone (obviously), they don't find out till they've all been back at work for a while & someone twigs

glenn: oh my jonah why didn't you tell us your daemon settled again!!

jonah: oh well i-

glenn: we have to throw you a settling party!!

jonah: .....and that's why

- unfortunately Jonah never told his parents that his daemon unsettled. they've just been faking it whenever his family are around & figured they'd cross the bridge when they came to it. they're now at the bridge. ah shit.

- his daemon's old settled form was a blue jay so he ends up going to Dina like 'hey you have a lot of birds. do you have like. a bird guy. can you get me a really specific type of bird'.

(Dina's like 'oh hey your daemon used to be a really cool bird? but you gave it up? I think less of you as a person for knowing this'. Jonah: ?????)

- tries to pass off this regular bird he's acquired as his daemon while his actual daemon hides inside his jacket or whatever. it is a disaster.

(when adult's daemons unsettle the most common outcome is actually for them to settle back into their original form once they've moved on from whatever triggered it so Jonah isn't unreasonable in assuming he won't actually end up w a new daemon form. he's not pleased when his daemon admits that she's pretty sure she's not going to re-settle as a blue jay or any kind of bird for that matter)

- jonah totes his daemon around & gesticulates w her like this

[asexual-means-no-attraction]

I apologise in advance if this is actually rude or insensitive, and feel free to tell me yo go f mysrlf lmao. My issue with trans community is them not seeing women as people, at least that's what I see. FtMs feel they are better than them (because they are Men) and for them women are inferior beings whose role is to be their supportive partners, sex objects (hi, traditional gender roles), for MtFs women are fantasies made of stereotypes about makeup, dresses and ~being cute and submissive~, and when women are against this image of femininity, it's called being transphobic. What are your thoughts?

I think there's a lot to say about that topic, cuz you are right that there are people like that. But I don't think it's fair to say it's everyone in the trans community. I'm gonna break it down to explain some stuff, so get ready for a long post.

General:

-remember that there will always be bad apples. Within any group-- be it trans, cis, gay, straight, etc-- there is gonna be dicks. That doesn't mean the community they are apart of is all like that and because of that they shouldn't be used as a representative of said community.

Reasons for trans men acting sexist:

-they could just be legitimately sexist and just a shitty person

-over compensation of some kind? A lotta trans people feel like they gotta prove themselves sometimes and that can end up coming off as really rude. It gets a very "I'm better than you" vibe. Doesn't mean it's ok by any means tho. If you're being a dick you're being a dick regardless of the reason.

-resentment from how they were forced to be raised as a women when they weren't actually a women. I can see how that can cause someone to be kinda a dick. Again, doesn't make it ok but I get it.

-took the "I'm not like other girls" phase and ran. Definitely aren't like other girls cuz they aren't a girl at all. But never quite lost the "other girls are like how they are on TV" thought process that many girls get at some point. This causes them to think of girls as shallow and shitty people-- which is obviously super sexist and wrong.

In my own experience I see a lotta trans guys having a hard time accepting they're guys cuz of the whole "men are trash" thing. But I've definitely seen ones who hate on women too. But the most common type of trans man I see are the ones that just wanna live their lives, and aren't sexist at all. Most shitty ones I find online and I just ignore them. And I do feel for you cuz it seems you've had to deal with them a good deal. But like I said, I think it's something that should be discussed within the community but not used a representation of it.

Explainations for trans women being sexist:

-this one I've actually discussed in detail a good amount with trans women. It's very much an over compensating and misunderstanding thing.

Not a misunderstanding of what it means to be a women, but rather a really unsavory way to express being a women. One of the first ways a trans person comes to express or even just test and see if they're trans is through clothes. This ties indirectly into gender roles. Cuz obviously clothes aren't actually gendered. If a man wears a dress he's still a man. But with how our society is, it's easier to pass when you're dressed with how society expects.

When newly/not yet realized trans men dress in traditionally masculine clothes, it's not quite as big of a deal in most cases (key word most, everyone's situation is different) then it is for trans women. I dressed more masculine for a long time before I realized I was a trans man. Most people took it as me being a tomboy. But a newly/not yet realized trans women doesn't have that luxury. Men wearing dressed isn't normalized. So if a trans women were to wear a dress, it'd be fairly obvious in most cases that she isn't cis.

This is especially true since dresses aren't made for the biologically male body (they're barely made for most cis women's bodies honestly). So when a trans women wears a dress she looks... Off. Cuz the seams of the clothes don't fit her body type. But she wants to pass. And so she wears clothes that aren't suited for her shape, high heels, and makeup as a way to over compensate and try to pass and prove they're female (cuz they are).

You ever see those videos of little kids who get into their mom's makeup?? Or middle schools trying to look pretty and putting on so much makeup they look like a clown? How about those cis women who NEVER wear make up and have no idea what they're doing and end up looking really bad when they finally try makeup on their own??? That's exactly what happens with trans women.

I'm a trans man I have no idea how makeup works. Most cis men don't know how makeup works. Trans women often get thrown into the makeup industry with no idea what the fuck they are doing. But they know that makeup is gonna be really important to help them pass in most cases. So when they first start they just look awful. Cuz they don't know what they're doing.

Combine that with the fact that many cis men don't understand fashion either (I don't even understand fashion). In most cases, the way they're raised they're styles are gonna be really different than women's styles. So again, a trans women is being thrown into a fashion industry she really doesn't know much about. And is gonna act like a little kid who stole her mom's shoes and dresses and just looks ridiculous. Cuz she doesn't know what to do, or what looks right, or how to do it in a tasteful way, etc etc. So she takes it way too far without realizing it cuz she's trying so hard to pass with no real idea what to do or how to do it.

And all that added together can very very very easily come off as super rude to cis women. Cuz they are going overboard with the makeup and heels and everything else. It often comes off as disrespectful and insulting, as if saying being a women is all about makeup and heels. It's not intentional by any means, but that doesn't mean the misunderstanding doesn't exist. It's very much a reality.

You'll often find that when trans women do this, they calm down after a while. Cuz they REALIZE how they went too far. they realize they over compensated and it was kinda shitty. My gf is a friend's with a trans women who actively talks about how when she first came out she went way too far with being stereotypically feminine cuz she didn't know how much else to express herself and over compensated. She knows now that it was insulting and she definitely apologizes for it. It's one of the reasons why having resources for trans people is so important-- so that hopefully trans women can not only have support but also help in their transition so they don't end up over compensating like that.

It's also important to note that unless you have access to medically transitionig it's REALLY hard to pass for most trans women without going on the far end of stereotypical femininity. Cuz when people see dresses and heels they are going to think women before they think man. Thats just how society is. So naturally, they're gonna wear dresses and make up in order to pass.

-the other side of that coin is the fetish community and it's overlap within the trans community. There is-- as I'm sure you know-- many people out there who treat being trans as a fetish. This isn't someone who's kinky and trans or someone who's kinks tie into being trans. But rather someone who's ONLY reason for being trans is because of a fetish-- i.e. it's all inherently a sexual thing.

And when it comes to trans women who are into trans for the fetish, you'll often find they are the ones who take that really far distasteful representation of feminity you were talking about and don't ever calm down. They don't later realize "ah, I've been over compensating and I can relax. I literally just wanna live my life as the women I am" and instead continue on with this over expression of stereotypical femininity.

I could go and make an even longer post about the possible reasons someone has a fetish like this. But basically. There are many people OBSESSED with women with dicks, being a women with a dick, being turned into a women for sexual reasons, etc etc. It's a fetish for them, not a realization of who you actually are. And it definitely does effect the trans community and how it's viewed by those outside the community.

There's no sure fire way to know the difference between these kinds people unfortunately. And there is something to be said with how they make the trans community look. I'm not gonna give my own opinion on it unless someone asks. I'm just saying it as a possible explanation of why you've met trans women who act so overly feminine it's almost insulting to women as a whole (including other trans women).

I hope that helps you and all makes sense.

On a final note:

-especially online trying to discuss literally any topic is gonna get you accused of being [what]phobic unfortunately. So I'm not surprised you've been called transphobic for saying that sometimes the way trans people express themselves feel like they're super stereotypical and that's kinda insulting. I don't know how you phrased it, but I can get both sides. Especially since many trans people deal with hate comments. I'm not saying you are or aren't transphobic, I don't know you well enough. But so long as you respect trans people and their gender, I don't think you have anything to worry about. (Calling someone out isn't the same as disrespect as an fyi)

[quacka-quacka]

Paul McCartney and femininity

Despite admitting that he can't help being cute, our cute Beatle still doesn't like this title. Paul always loves to contend how tough he is, as if it's a virtue - compared to soft, the sign of being feminine.

After checking numerous interviews, videos and remarks from people of Beatles inner circle, you may sense that most of time [by no means all, don't need to find counterexamples], Paul doesn't want to be related to femininity. Except for being called cute and soft, homosexuality is also a sensitive matter to Paul. I must say he's not homophobic - going out with gay guys, wearing a rainbow flag, encouraging a girl to come out openly. But he always shows excessive enthusiasm in showing his immovable heterosexuality, even when it's unnecessary.

HOLLY: Heather Mills says she’s bossy. Do you need bossing around?

PAUL: Well she seems to think so. I think I’m fine.

HOLLY: You must be very secure with yourself.

PAUL: I think it is that. I’m ok with gay people too, because I’m essentially comfortable with my sexuality. I can goof around with gay people. I sort of know who I am by now. And it’s about time.

— Paul McCartney, interviewed by Holly Millea, November 23, 2002

It's understandable that he doesn't want his sexuality be mislabeled, but why did he so eager to "self-defense" without being asked? After answered he won't be bossed around by a woman, homosexuality seemed to be the first thing come to his mind.

Homosexuality does have something in common with femininity [being bossed by a woman is also one of the manifestations]: the lack of masculinity in stereotype. In a patriarchal society, being masculine is always a virtue, whether it's a male or a female. When praising a woman for being strong,  we would say that she has big dick energy. But would you praise a man for being feminine? Unfortunately, he would be mocked, insulted and cursed. This is the consensus of the whole society: woman would be praised for behaving "like a man" but man would be despised for behaving "like a woman". It's clear that Paul is also under the influence of this stereotype: being femininity is shameful. Considering his northern working-class growing background in 1950s, it's not easy to make a change.

As for those who despise effeminate man, I would say they are rather misogynous and homophobic, it's good to see someone objecting it. But to my disappointment, some of Paul's fans, who claim to be anti-homophobic are trying to sell something outdated, like Another Kind of Mind.

As I said, objecting those misogynous jerks is a right thing to do, and assuming a man being gay by his feminine gestures and humiliate him is certainly a homophobic thing [that's what you said that a person's sexuality can be determined by a third party], but what's that suppose to mean? Straight men can't be feminine? OMG!feminine! Are you implying it's disgusting for a man to be feminine? You didn't criticize this absurd concept of society but seemed to be eager to separate Paul from those effeminate types because he's "not a sassy queen". What do you mean? Saying a man being feminine is the same thing as determining a man being gay to you? Don't you realize how homophobic you are? I'm not here to discuss whether Paul is feminine or not, I'm just saying this is blatant discrimination against LGBTQ and women. The following example you made is also questionable:

As I said above, using men's words on a woman is not the same thing as using women's words on a man, think about that. Furthermore, your example is "a group of men coming on Tumblr and making post after post about a straight female celebrity, talking constantly about how butch she is", are your saying it is mainly the girls on Tumblr making those homophobic assumptions about Paul? There are more women than men being misogynous? Why don't you blame those men who make up the majority of homophobes and misogynists but turn to blame on some fan girls? If you still have a little conscience, please don't drag lesbian and straight women here to rationalise your homophobic and misogynous "proposal" while blaming all these shit on them, they own you nothing.