#It really bothers me that English didn't have a formal You anymore this feels so personal every time i day you and it don't even know...

[starpros-sunshine]

Thinking about the wataei exchange diary again....

[blueflyingturtleontheway]

Previously on Blue's Bafflegabs:

BUT as some of you may have already guessed, the Fates had a different plan for me.

Yes, I did watch the entirety of Hercules (1997) in Polish and in English, two times, scene after scene and analyzed every line, and I am going to expose you all to the consequences

But first some general info, shall we? First of all I'd like to vocalize the utter ADMIRATION I feel towards Ms Elżbieta Łopatniukowa, the Polish translator, the woman, the myth, the legend, she did absolute God's (or shall I say gods'?) work on this movie. But it probably wouldn't be what it is if not for the amazing director, Ms Joanna Wizmur, the woman who would later go on to direct Shrek, which is said to have revolutionized Polish dubbing industry, so you know we're talking about A Level™ here. They along with Mr Filip Łobodziński were truly the perfect team to create this mastery of dubbing.

I have to say that this movie was more of a problem for me than Encanto, and than I honestly expected, because, I'll admit, I didn't understand many parts of the original dialogues (thank you beautiful person who added good English subtitles, I am eternally indebted to you.) But the problem wasn't just the accents or old audio, you know? No, the reason is actually an interesting artistic technique used when writing the movie- there is a ton of slang put in the dialogue and frankly? It's genius. Usually, I'm against putting lots of slang and references in movies because it ages badly, sounds unnatural and doesn't fit into most settings (I am looking at you Raya), but here it was handled so well, it not only didn't bother me it even added to the story.

I don't know enough about American slang to say for sure but I have a few theories as to why it worked out where so many have failed before and after it. First, Hercules is first and foremost, a comedy. Yes, it's also a family movie which is why they changed the whole myth in the first place, but the narrative is comedic for like 90% of the story - this movie doesn't treat itself too seriously, therefore slang and colloquialisms are perfectly welcome. Another reason, equally if not more important, is the consistency, because the worst a story can do is throw in a slang term out of the blue. The tone and language used throughout the movie is announced in the first minute, when the muses interrupt the first narrator and from then on, almost every character uses the same level of formality in their speech, the gods, the Greeks, the Fates, everyone - so it's not jarring, this is the status quo where actually formal talk would be considered a deviation. And my third theory, the least probable and backed up by the least amount of knowledge, since I have no idea how outdated this slang was back when the movie was written, but the fact that it's not used anymore works in its favour. Just think about it, a movie set in Ancient Greece and the characters use... "ancient" slang from the 90s or earlier. It's a sort of a meta joke I'd say.

And I explained all that to note, that the Polish translator handled it perfectly... If not better than the original. Because you see, not only do the dialogues consist in a big percent of outdated Polish slang and are unique for the important characters (okay mainly Phil), but they also include a lot of more or less noticable references to the classical culture, so it combines the Ancient and the "ancient" aspect of the movie even better.

So if that's all said and you know what to look out for, let's dive right into the movie! (I suppose the most comfortable way of reading this would be if you had the movie in the background or remember it really way because I have once again, not specified a lot)

+ “No to lu, panienki” fantastic line, I love it. It’s basically what he says in English ("You go, girl") but the vibe✨

= They didn’t translate the innuendo and instead Thalia (yes, I did look up the muses’ names specifically for this post) says just “Would any of us resist him?” but I’ll let you decide if it’s for better or worse

* Just like with Encanto each song will get its own post

+ Hera says just “let’s lay down now” instead of “behave yourself” which makes her sound even more like a good mother, which I guess she is supposed to be in this movie

- Hermes calls himself “king” when he tells other gods to let him through, which is clearly only a metaphor for how cool he is but meh I don’t really like it

* I literally do not understand what he meant when he told Hera about those flowers so let’s ignore that

+ Hermes says that the party is “godly” which really is the word we use in the same way like “fabulous” but here it also acts as a pun 😁

^ Imma use this symbol for talking about non translation related stuff, because I just have to note that whatever the accent Hera has is called, it made me confused for a good while what the heck is “dee-ya” that she says, before I turned on the subtitles

^ It was "dear". I'm not even going to think about English pronunciation anymore.

+ “Herkulesik” 🥺 Using a diminutive here just makes it even better

+ And now HERE things start to get interesting, because in the og dub Hades says that he hasn’t been so choked up since he got a hunk of moussaka stuck in his throat. Moussaka is of course a traditional Greek dish, so this is a cool cultural reference. BUT. In Polish he instead talks about a tuber of asphodel and you may be asking, but what is an asphodel? Why, asphodel is a kind of flower that not only was believed to be the food of the dead, by the Ancient Greeks, but also was said to grow on the Asphodel Meadows near the Styx in the Underworld. That’s how good the references are in this dubbing.

- The pun of “a sucker for the little sucker” couldn’t been conveyed :(

^ Again I am thankful for the subtitles because I swear I’d understand “you ought to slow down” as “yo, slow down”

+ And here’s an interesting thing! As I watched the English version I was wondering how’d they translate Panic’s name, because the word “panic” is in Polish feminine “panika” and turns out they just made it a male name kinda by force, cutting off the “a” and making him just Panik (I’d also say it sounds quite cute in Polish :3)

^ I swear where do they get the words like uncouth and lugubrious from

^ I mean objectively I love it when children/not very serious media uses smart/scientific words but do you realize the amount of googling I had to do for this movie

^ I just have to say that the fact that the anglophones pronounce Zeus as Zoos, or as we’d write it, Zus, is just quite funny for Poles XD

+ “Zeus, ruler of the universe and its surroundings”

- No alliteration :(

+ I’m sorry but the line “Ja wiem, kapuję, ja to wręcz przyswajam” is just so iconic, and it uses such perfectly colloquial language I don’t think I can translate it back into English

* “Taking control of the business” I’d say it’s better, but then again once I googled what a bid is, the og is also pretty funny

^ Oh did I mention how much nostalgia will cloud my judgment

^ Because it absolutely will

* I have to say how much I love the fact they use the form “Tytany” instead of “Tytanów” because it’s the archaic form and it’s nice :>

+ Hades paraphrases Polish idiom of “question for 10 points” by saying “question for 10 obols” :D

= I don’t know, google says that “Grecian formula” might be a reference to a hair product and if it is, it’s funnier than in Polish, where Herc just gets called a firefly (which I’d say is still funny)

+ Szhchc instead of “potion” in Polish Pain says “flacha” which means specifically a bottle of alcohol :’D

+ In Polish they call him specifically “Sunday coachman” instead of just “driver”

^ Btw I had no idea this idiom is also used in this meaning in English that’s cool

- I kinda wish they conveyed the “Pop” somehow, but I suppose we really don’t have that many synonyms for “dad” in Polish

+ Demetrius says “oh gods” instead of “oh my goodness” :D

+ Wait they give him name only in the Polish dub huh

* And with Phidias that makes it two famous sculptors’ names :D

^ Hsbhbhhibda NOT only does the guy say five is an even number, he also puts out only four fingers :’D

* OKAY AND I LOVE THIS ONE

* BECAUSE

+ Instead of “maybe we should call him Jerkules” they make a direct callback to the famous translation of “Non Hercules contra plures” as “I Herkules dupa kiedy wrogów kupa” (something like “Even Hercules is an ass when going against a mass” (mass as in many people)) except since this is a kids movie they can’t say “ass” so the kids say “zupa” (soup) which is exactly how kids censor their swear words, so not only is this a fantastic reference to the Latin quote, but also it genuinely sounds like something a kid would say

+ Again the merchant exclaims “oh gods!” I feel like they generally use this more in Polish

+ Amphitryon uses the diminutive of “son”, “synek” :3

^ Jesteś bogiem, wyobraź to sobie sobie – Zeus, totalnie

- Aw I suppose it was about the length, but I wished they used the actual phrase “wstrzymaj konie” instead of the one they did, it would be a literal translation of “hold your horses” too

+ Philoctetes uses many russianisms (which is fascinating and works fantastically character wise, but there'd be much more cultural, social and linguistic knowledge required and we don't have time for that anyway, so just trust me when I say it's genius) and talks exactly like an old creepy uncle would 12/10 amazing job

+ Herc inflects Phil’s name into vocativus and I have to say it just sounds so endearing

- We don’t have “go the distance” being used and referenced so consistently through the movie :<

+ Abhcbzhscbjh “filuj Filu” :’D See, it’s a pun because “filuj” means something like “watch” but it does sound like his name too (Phil in Polish is written Fil)

+ There's this subtle difference in acting but I love how in English Phil just asks "Zeus?" whereas in Polish it's really "Zeus?!" it's about the emotions y'kno

^ AHAHCBJHB I love watching this movie after I’ve read some Greek tragedies, because Thebes

+ “Wonderboy” got translated literally but you know what, I think it’s kinda charming

+ Awww Herc diminutes Phil’s name to “Filcio/u”

* Ayyy another russianism from Phil, he calls Herc a “gieroj”, I’ve already noted it as a plus, but I have to appreciate how consistent they are with this

+ AND Phil also uses an archaic form of “żeś zobaczył” instead of “że zobaczyłeś”

- Megara’s iconic line of “(…) at least they would if I had any friends” got translated as well as it could’ve but it still doesn’t sound as good :(

+ Hhzbchz Meg says “it’s been godly” instead of “it’s been a real slice” (dw it sounds more natural in Polish) and y’know, unconscious foreshadowing

+ Btw Hercules uses the formal you for Megara for this whole interaction!

+ Instead of just theme park, Meg says straight up Disneyland XD

+ So was “I’m a bunny – and I’m his gopher” a reference to something? Because if not then Polish reference to Winnie the Pooh with “and I’m his relative and friend” (based on the Polish translation of Rabbit’s “friends-and-relations”) wins

- Asolkscoao to keep the pun with Meg’s name – the original nut-Meg – Meg gets called Meg-alomania :’D

+ “You were supposed to get the river guardian on my – and by the way the only right – side” >>>> “I thought you were going to persuade the guardian into joining my side for the uprising”

* Okay so I have to ask just because it keeps racking in my brain – is the “Peloponnesian minute” a reference to something? Is it true you guys say stuff like “New York minute” to just mean quickly???

* Bhbshbjh it’s not exactly better but “Herkulesów jak mrówków” just cracks me up

= Instead of “Britanny” the popular girls name is said to be “Izaura” as a reference to the TV show and I don’t know, I suppose they both work but in a different way, Izaura fits cause it’s a Latin name so it sounds natural in this setting, but I suppose it was part of the joke in the og dub to contrast Jason and Britanny (although with how popular modern name Jason is, at least for me, it completely doesn’t sound ancient)

This was already almost three pages of my doc so I'll divide this analysis into two parts and then, like before, make a separate post for each song.

Hope you enjoyed this one and see you soon!

Edit: second part is up!

[ethereal-not-occult]

patience and the mulberry

"With time and patience, the mulberry leaf becomes a silk gown."

Fandom: Good Omens Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) Characters: Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale (Good Omens) Additional Tags: Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Fluff and Angst, Character(s) of Color, Sericulture, silkworms, past religious trauma, but nothing bad happens in this fic I promise, mixed bookverse w/ TV elements, references to Chinese culture Notes: Originally written for the @goodomensfashionzine​ !

“I'll only be a minute, dear.” Aziraphale kissed Crowley's cheek as he opened the door of the Bentley. “You don't have to see me to the door if you don't want to.”

Crowley tightened his grip on the wheel. “Sure, angel. Sounds good to me.” The sibilants slid far too quickly past his clenched jaw, and he bit his tongue to stop the instinctive hiss from escaping.

Aziraphale gave him a sympathetic look, but shut the Bentley's door behind him and soon disappeared through the doors of the church. Once he was out of sight, Crowley slumped forward slightly, sliding his sunglasses up and rubbing at his eyes. A few deep breaths later, and he felt composed enough to exit the Bentley himself in blatant disregard for the “NO PARKING” sign on the curb.¹

[¹ Given his new job position (or lack thereof), lawbreaking was no longer a necessity, but old habits die hard.]

The bright afternoon sun made him wince a bit, and two robins in a nearby bush were getting frisky in a way he would never be able to unhear, but they made it easier to forget the distant wail of air sirens. Even standing out on the road, Crowley's skin prickled faintly with the remembered sting of consecrated ground.

He pushed the feeling aside and walked resolutely forward. Aziraphale was bound to take his sweet time as he mooned over the church's dusty old tomes, but Crowley had his own investigations to conduct while he waited. No rest for the wicked and all that.

The concrete pavement under his snakeskin shoes gave way to grass, and the tingling sensation in his soles faded. Soon he found himself at his intended destination—an Edenic grove of mulberry trees, clustered together in a ring in the church's backyard. He'd spotted them on the drive over and couldn't resist the temptation of a closer look.

Crowley wandered into the garden with a scrutinizing eye. They were young, for trees, but growing well despite their callowness. A particularly stocky sapling hardly flinched when Crowley gave it a token glare, much to his disappointment. Then again, outdoor plants were rarely as well-behaved as properly cowed houseplants. It seemed this attitude persisted even in ecclesiastic gardens such as these.

He cast a surreptitious glance over his shoulder, then reached a hand up into the tree's umbrella-like branches and tugged. The season wasn't quite right for fruits, but he still withdrew clutching a handful of dark ripe mulberries. Hardly apples, but his lips twitched upwards nonetheless. He plucked a berry from the pile and raised it to his lips.

“Zaoshang hao!”

Only a hasty miracle saved Crowley from choking as he jumped and swiveled around. Hovering right outside the churchyard was a middle-aged human, well-dressed and smiling pleasantly at him. Judging by her formal clothing and the Bible she carried, she was a part of the congregation, maybe even the priest herself. Crowley swallowed and stepped backwards.

“Ni shi jiaohui de xinshou ma?” the human called again, picking her way across the dewy grass in his direction. Crowley eyed the Bible she held, willing himself not to break out into hives.

“Um. Wo bu—er, no. I'm not new. Not here for church at all, actually.” He fidgeted and clasped his hands, still full of pilfered mulberries, behind his back. “Just waiting for someone.”

The human raised an eyebrow. “You're welcome to wait inside, if you like,” she said, also switching to English. “I reckon we still have biscuits left from the children's morning service—”

“No!” Crowley said too quickly, and perhaps too sharply. He winced. “I mean. That won't be necessary. I'd much rather stay out here, if it isn't too much trouble.”

The human gave him a Look. Crowley's cheeks heated and he averted his eyes, willing his sunglasses a few shades darker.

“Beautiful, aren't they?”

Crowley's head shot back up. The human had turned her back to him and was running a hand through the glossy green leaves of the nearest mulberry tree. Crowley could practically see the branches stretch out in delight beneath her touch, like a purring cat.

“Volunteers from our congregation take care of them,” the human continued, smiling at the young tree. “The kids here like raising silkworms, you see, and we welcome them to pick leaves from the trees each week to feed them.”

Silkworms. Of course. Despite himself, a hazy memory rose to the forefront of his mind: Sichuan, China, several hundreds of years ago. A family farm, weathered and cozy and oozing enough sheer goodness to make the average demon ill with it. Crowley wouldn't normally be caught dead in such a place, but he had owed a favour to the angel. His fingers twitched at the phantom memory of butter-soft silk fibres against his skin; long, winding threads that stretched out thin and fine, tangling so easily around his uncertain fingers. With this memory came the golden, moon-round face of a child he hadn't thought about in centuries, grinning toothily as they held out a box to him, a box filled with small pale larvae that wriggled among the spade-shaped leaves. “Zhe jiao can.”

Crowley forced himself to return to the present. The human was speaking to him.

“—waiting on Mr. Fell?” she asked.

Crowley blinked. Shook himself a little. “Yeah. He's helping out with the restoration of some old manuscript or other.”

The human smiled again. It was an unnervingly piercing expression. “I'm aware. I was the one who requested his help. Such a lovely man. Are you a friend of his?”

Crowley tensed. “His husband, actually.”

He braced himself, but the human only brightened. “Goodness, then you must be Mr. Crowley! Mr. Fell talks ever so much about you. Finally gone and tied the knot then, have you?”

Before Crowley could stammer out a reply, something dinged loudly, making him jump. The human pulled a phone out from her pocket and squinted at the screen.

“Sorry, I have to run back inside. But it was lovely meeting you, Mr. Crowley.” She stuck out a hand—thankfully not the one that had been holding the Bible—and after a brief hesitation, Crowley shook it. As quickly as she had arrived, the human disappeared from the garden, leaving Crowley alone and off-kilter amid a grove of mulberry trees.

---

Aziraphale emerged from the church around an hour later to find Crowley seated on the curb next to the Bentley, basking in the last rays of the afternoon sun as he scrolled through his phone.

“My dear,” the angel sighed. His joints creaked as he eased himself down to sit next to Crowley on the roadside. “Don't tell me you've been sitting here the entire time.”

“Nope,” Crowley said, popping the ‘p’. “I toured the gardens for a bit. Swiped some fruits, too. The mulberries aren’t half-bad, for a bunch of church plants, but they’ll need a good deal more threatening before they're really up to snuff.”

Crowley stopped when he saw Aziraphale chewing his lip, brow furrowed as he studied Crowley's face. Now it was Crowley's turn to sigh.

“Really, angel. It's fine. I was hardly bored.”

The expression didn't leave Aziraphale's face. A soft brown hand reached out and brushed aside stray wisps of hair from Crowley's forehead. The demon hadn't bothered to cut it since the Apocalypse-that-wasn't, and it was growing longer and more unruly by the day.

“I'm fine.” Crowley caught Aziraphale's hand and held it, carefully. He pressed his lips against the well-manicured fingers. “It was years ago, angel, and we both came out of it all right. You don't need to worry about me.”

Aziraphale still looked vaguely distressed as Crowley drew him close. With the sun setting behind him, framing his face and curly dark hair in a golden halo, he was the most beautiful thing Crowley had ever seen.

He kissed him then, right there on the road, in full sight of the church and probably Someone Else, too, if She happened to be watching at that particular moment. Once, he would've been terrified of such a public display, but he hadn't gone through hellfire and holy water to care anymore about what others thought of them.

As he helped Aziraphale into the Bentley, he noticed abruptly that the angel was carrying what appeared to be a shoebox, of all things, along with his usual camelhair coat.

“What on Earth is that?”

“Oh!” Aziraphale carefully pushed the box over to Crowley. “Mrs. Lao gave it to me once I'd finished with those manuscripts. She said it was a gift for you, actually. Have the two of you met before?”

Crowley stared down at the box, baffled. “We talked for a bit in the gardens just now, but I can’t imagine why…”

He trailed off, and his mouth dropped open as Aziraphale eased open the lid and beheld the contents with a raised eyebrow.

“Good heavens. Are those caterpillars?”

“Silkworms,” Crowley corrected automatically, leaning in for a closer look. There were so many of them, somehow both smaller and larger than he remembered, all white and wiggly and chomping away busily at the layers of mulberry leaves filling their box. None of them paid any attention whatsoever to their occult observers hovering above them.

“Why would she give you such a thing? Not that they aren't dear little creatures,” Aziraphale added hastily, glancing into the box, “but I doubt I have the means to keep them in the bookshop.”

“No need,” Crowley said before he could stop himself. “I can raise 'em in my flat.”

Aziraphale gave him a curious look. “You know how to care for these… insects?”

“Yeah.” Crowley gently shut the lid of the inhabited shoebox and curled a hand around the Bentley's stick-shift. “I've done something like this, before. I know what I'm doing.”

“If you say so.” Suddenly Aziraphale chuckled. At Crowley's affronted look, he demurred, “I'm not making fun, my dear. It's only that you still manage to surprise me, even after all these years.”

Aziraphale leaned in and pecked Crowley's cheek, making him blush red and sputter. Much to his disgruntlement, the Bentley chirped a light-hearted rendition of Haydn's Crazy Little Thing Called Love all the way home.

---

Crowley had spent the past eleven years co-parenting the Antichrist with Aziraphale.² They had faced this challenge head-on, and in his opinion, it hadn’t gone too shabbily. Now, without the threat of the Apocalypse hanging over his head, becoming a surrogate parent was far less daunting the second time around.

[² Even if young Warlock hadn't really been the son of Satan, it was the principle of the thing.]

Still, Crowley worried. He had always been something of a worrier, and that hadn't changed even after the First Day of the Rest of Their Lives.

After dropping off Aziraphale at the bookshop, Crowley returned to his flat, where he commenced the preparations for introducing his unexpected twenty-odd guests to their new home. This was accomplished by miracling up a small glass aquarium onto his desk, lining the bottom with paper towels, and carefully (read: nervously) placing the silkworms one by one into the tank. Once this was done, Crowley scattered the half-eaten mulberry leaves from the box around the aquarium. The silkworms set upon their interrupted lunch with all the enthusiasm of Aziraphale devouring a meringue pie at the Ritz.

Crowley slumped into his chair, took off his sunglasses with a wince, and rested his chin on his desk, staring into the glass tank.

“I raised your ancestors once, you know,” Crowley informed the wriggling creatures. “Tiny farm in China several centuries back. We'd weave branches together into a tray and let you loose inside. Bit like how manmade beehives work, or something.”

Crowley paused. Watched one silkworm slowly inch its way across a stem to tackle a new section of leaf. “‘Course, humans use wire mesh nowadays, but the general premise is the same. Always thought it was bloody clever, what humans could come up with. If you gave me a bunch of moth larvae and told me to make a living out of them, I definitely wouldn't think to make clothes.” He snorted. “Whoever came up with that, I'd like a glass of whatever they were drinking.”

The silkworms munched on. They ate much faster than they crawled, that was certain. In the quiet walls of his flat, away from prying human eyes, Crowley loosened the knot of his silk tie and tugged it off, easing the tightness around his neck.

“You're the ones who made this, in a sense,” he said, waving the tie at them. He laid the tie beside one glass wall of the tank at just the right angle for the inhabitants within to see. Several silkworms looked up curiously.

Crowley tossed his suit jacket aside, then unbuttoned his shirt collar. He had always prided himself on his sharp, modern attire over the years, the better to tempt humans with—or so he claimed. Despite repeated scoldings from his superiors, his Lust quotas had never been quite up to par.

Sufficiently dishevelled, and feeling all the freer for it, Crowley sank back into his chair to watch the silkworms.

“The only thing I didn't like about the process was the boiling,” he murmured. “Logically, I can see why it was done. And you would all be in cocoons, so it's not like you'd be in any pain. Not like I was.” He exhaled, the sound becoming a low hiss. “But still. Never liked it. Always felt like an awful lot of trouble just for the sake of some silk threads.”

One particularly adventurous silkworm had nosed its way upwards and was now creeping over the edge of the tank opening. Crowley made a mental note to devise a lid of some kind and stuck his finger against the lip of the tank. The silkworm crawled onto his hand without any hesitation. Tentatively, he drew it closer. Its many feet stuck stubbornly to his skin, and it reared up as he approached, swaying slightly, its mandibles twitching.

Crowley stared at the silkworm. The silkworm stared back, and seemed disappointed when Crowley had nothing else to offer. Just to prove it wrong, Crowley materialized a single large mulberry leaf in his other hand and presented it to the insect, who fell upon it with gluttonous enthusiasm.

Staring at the miracled leaf, an idea formed in Crowley's mind. He smiled, slowly.

“I need a hobby, now that I'm jobless,” he said aloud to the silkworm, letting it creep onto his palm. He ran a careful finger over its smooth back. “I think I'll take up sericulture again, for old time's sake.” He reached back into the tank and gently encouraged the silkworm to crawl back inside.

“Humans have to boil you alive to get those nice unbroken threads off your cocoons,” Crowley mused, withdrawing his hand. “Fortunately, I don't have to do things the human way.” He lowered himself until he was eye-level with the inhabitants of the tank. The silkworm he had carried paused in its perpetual eating and turned its head, almost like it was looking at him.

“How's this?” Crowley asked. “You'll be able to grow into a fuzzy, fully grown silk-moth, and I can take your cocoon after you've finished with it and miracle the threads whole again.” He paused and mulled it over. “I guess I could take it a step further and just miracle the finished silk together, but there's still something to be said about the human way of doing things.”

The silkworm bobbed the front half of its body as though in agreement. Crowley smiled again.

“We can make silk, and no one gets hurt. I'm a few hundred years out of practice, but I'm sure I could make it work, somehow.”

The silkworm turned its attention back to its meal. Crowley didn't notice. He was too busy wondering if Aziraphale had any old texts on silk-weaving that he could borrow, just so he could refresh his memory.

The angel would appreciate having a new silk bowtie to add to his collection.

---

Thank you for reading! Replies and reblogs are always much appreciated. <3

[itsthe-neo-zone]

Married to Mr Choi - TXT series

Please read the Masterlist before continuing ahead with this chapter.

Chapter 2:

“Hurry up and fix her hair.” the clipping at my scalp wouldn't end...

“Where’s the pins? this part is slipping.” a pull here, a tug there...

“Here, let me past. I'll help with the makeup.”

“Stop, stop, stop.” I pulled my hands up waving them around carelessly. This was hopeless. I was in the same position for the past 2 hours and it was getting frustrating, I couldn’t breath without someone doting on me unnecessarily. It’s like I was told I could only live for the next 20 hours.

I stormed out of the room, not handling the heat anymore. Every chance I tried to take to talk to Wooyoung he brushed me off like I was 6 or something.

I was livid, absolutely fuming, if you could see smoke evaporating off my arms and head it would be visible from 10 meters away.

The guilt tripping and the manipulation was one thing, but it was a completely different situation if I was being sold for a half of Gangnam and a few toy arms for my brothers to play about with.

“This isn’t happening, I’m not being sold off.”

“You aren’t though.” I rolled my eyes; the lying was going to end here. I couldn’t take any more of this...

“What is this then? Hm? What do you call this?” I shoved the papers into Wooyoung’s face, the others were spread out across the salon.

They watched what was happening but didn’t respond. They weren’t about to get involved. Typical mafia behaviour.

“It’s a contract, but it has nothing to-”

“Oh really? Why's my name splodged all over it then?” I stomped my feet on the floor, Six hours to the wedding and here I am half-dressed and a complete wreck.

“Mila you need to calm down!” Seonghwa tried to break up the fight that was about to start but I was having none of it.

Deep, deep, deep, down I knew I was overreacting, and I should listen to what they have to say, but they didn’t have to know that... My dignity was being smashed and trampled on; I couldn’t stand here like a lifeless dummy any longer.

“It’s not your name written here; you’re not being sold off like boxed arms so don’t tell me to calm down!” my voice was getting louder by the second.

“Mila Sofía Tesoro, you’ll stop right this instant.” I flinched. The echo of my mother’s voice snapped against the marbled walls and came at me like a tsunami.

I felt the blood pumping fast across my body and it felt like I was buzzing, a strange vibrating feeling crawled across my skin.

Everything went silent for a short moment...

I stared at her in disbelief, she pushed me – her own daughter – into an arranged marriage based on work and business reasons for our family and she shamelessly yelled at me when I caught them in the act?

“So what if they created a deal along with your marriage? It’s what all good traders do.”

She entered calmly into the room but her eyes were a raging fire of shock, she wouldn't think me, her lovely and quiet Mila would make such an outburst...

“Its what all gangs do...” the mutter went past her but not past Wooyoung who sent a glance.

“You should be proud of your brothers, if it wasn’t for Wooyoung,” she set her hand onto his shoulder standing against me. “You wouldn’t be marrying into such a wealthy and strong family like the Choi clan.”

“What if I never wanted to marry from them? You ever thought about that?” I spat back. It was starting to hit me; I was being robbed of my freedom.

“Stop acting so oblivious. You knew this was going to happen all along, you were born with no options...

This was the plan the moment you were born.”

Thinking back, I know she was right. They didn’t keep this a secret or something that should be hidden from me, this was always bound to happen and secretly I knew that…

Her mouth a gun, the words shooting through me like a bullet, each one hitting every barrier I had put up over this topic. I tricked myself ever since the age of 4 to believe I had a choice.

She was completely right, I traced back to every memory I had locked away and buried deep in my head.

But I wasn’t ready to give up, I wasn’t ready to go down without a fight. My stubborn and absentminded self wouldn’t let me believe their hurtful and inevitable destiny for me.

I reached the elevator and decided to press any random floor, all of them seemed to have an extended balcony. I needed fresh air right now. I felt like I was suffocating.

“Your suffering now because of your headless thoughts. If you would have accepted your future this wouldn’t be your position right now.”

My nerves in the tips of my fingers weakened droppings some of the papers in my hand.

I wanted to run away and leave, to never come back here again. Maybe it would have been better if I left with father...

I ran out of the main room and down corridors, -ignoring every call and wail of my name, being completely honest, I didn't even want to hear my name- the hotel booked for the formality seemed luxurious than I had expected, I hadn’t taken a decent look at the structure.

Pushing against the main glass doors harshly I sucked the air in, it’s strange, I was breaking to the surface after being underwater for minutes. I inhaled deeply.

Every second the elevator took. Every minute I spent making my way to an outdoor opening felt like I was slowly losing breath and emptying out.

It took me a few seconds but I made it.

“Excuse me, are you ok?” A voice came from the left of me, my eyes widened and all at once the trees and garden set up with seating and bouquets didn’t catch my attention for much longer.

Leaning against the railing I took a quick moment to gather myself. The cool breeze against my skin calmed me for a moment.

I’m sure if I had a mirror my face would be as red as a strawberry. I puffed out a few times.

Turning to see who was addressing me in such a calm and polite manner, I glanced up and down at the tall and slender figure of a young male.

His maroon-brown hair was styled in a casual manner contrasting against the suit he was adorned in.

“I’m fine.”

What caught my attention the most was the concerned look on his face and the sparkling round orbs he had. The warmest feeling filled my entire being with a single look into the depth his eyes had.

Two large windows onlooking into his soul.

“Don’t look fine to me.” He spoke after a short pause. His voice was deep, and he mumbled the words. I noticed the accent he had, English must not be his first language.

“Needed a breath of fresh… air is all.” I turned my body to face him and only then did I feel a sense of regret for running out without getting the gown beneath patched up slightly.

“Ah.” I closed my eyes pressing my lips into a thin line, impulsivity and recklessness always got me into situations like this. Awkward was practically my middle name.

“Sorry for…” I waved my hands about hinting and the mess I was in, looking anywhere but his eyes.

“Ah no, no its quite alright.”

His smile was so soft and as he chuckled lightly it brought a glimmer of warmth to he atmosphere.

“Anyways, what are you here for? you look-” I paused trying to think of a suitable word that wouldn’t offend the good-looking stranger and make me look like an absolute pervert. “Uh- orderly?”

I slipped my tongue back into my mouth. It was sticking out to the side, a habit picked up from San. The stranger smirked, he was perceptive, attentive to the movements and mannerisms I subconsciously did. Reminded me of a squirrel.

“Thank you, I’m close with the groom, there is a wedding here this evening?” His accent was adorable it added to the charisma he had.

“Yeah, there is.” I smiled; it wasn’t bursting with happiness though. He brought back the melancholy I was feeling, it was only gone for a second, but I wished the moment were longer. It had been a while since I felt this calm.

“But you came here, looking sad. Is e-everything… ok?” he stuttered a little, but the words were clear and understandable.

Hoping he wouldn’t notice through my clothes I was the bride, I stayed silent for a moment before deciding to talk again.

“I just- I needed a break from people. I felt really… overwhelmed.” It was hard explaining my emotions. I wasn’t good with words especially when it came to topic is like this. Emotions and all.

Exhaling I turned to look out into the distance the rush was still going in the gardens. People down there; they looked like ants.

“So whats the groom like?” I kept my flickering eyes focused down and away from him.

“We are very close; he can be a bother sometimes but he’s very mature and older than me, so I trust him. He’s great!”

My heart started pounding so loud, afraid he’d hear I set my hand on my chest breathing deeply. I was trying to be as subtle as possible.

He must be 28 or maybe even 34. I would gladly take my life right now.

“That’s great.” Cursing internally for the voice break I had, I excused myself with a cough.

Passing it off as a croaky throat wasn’t as hard as understanding that the man I’m marrying tonight was old. Older than the stranger next to me.

“I should get going. Got to prepare for the wedding.” He brushed the edges of the suits. He did look like he was leaving when I burst in.

“Taehyun.” Ah…

“Whats your name?” I mumbled, wanting him to stay a little longer, even if I had met him for a few seconds...

He seemed like a good person to talk to. Someone who would listen.

“Will I see you at the wedding? Are you invited?” His head piped up after turning, definitely a squirrel.

I sighed “I’ll surprise you.”

“Just the veil, that’s all that’s left. You’re ready.”

It’ll be a surprise alright. I hated the idea of ruining my chances, but this was the last few moments I would be able to freely joke and mingle with those unfamiliar to me. The thrill I would have no longer after tonight.

~~~

After reluctantly getting back to the others and having the final preparations complete I had finally done my fittings,

And about time too, my feet were starting to numben up.

If I explained how enthralled I was with hearing those words, it wouldn’t be enough to fully describe how happy I was. Dressing and preparing the ‘image’ they found to be perfect

“You may go down to the hallway and greet some of the guests. Some of your friends are down there.”

“Who’s Beomgyu?”

But it was short lived.

"Don’t go into the garden though, Beomgyu is there.” The words were muttered carelessly.

“Your husband to be, silly.”

Oh so that’s his name? I barely knew a thing about him. Apart from the fact that he’s older than the age of 25, it’s what that taehyun guy said.

“Omg, Mila! You look great.” Yuna squealed, the energy in her was incomparable at the moment. She was freely jumping up and down. God did I wish I were in a skimpy skirt and flowy top, would have been ten times better than what I’m in.

As I made my way down, I had trouble with my dress trying to lift it, so I don’t sweep the carpeted floor of all 6 levels of the hotel.

The soft satin kept slipping past my grip, leading to a red and puffed out state for my entrance to the hall.

It was a few steps from the stairs to the grand entrance, but it felt like miles away.

“Lucky! This is so… freaking, heavy!” drawling my words out I tugged at the weighted train.

“You should be glad this was the dress they picked the other one was 2 times heavier.” Yuna's voice was filled with so much happiness, you'd think she's the one getting married...

 “We can’t have a beautiful bride get married in a garbage bag, can we? Especially one as pretty as you.”

“It’s not about the designer tag, I’d be fine with practically anything at this point.” I huff getting a little frustrated.

“You could give me a garbage bag and I’ll gladly accept.”

I turned to my side to see a very tall man, the first thing I noticed was his handsome features, I was sure- for a second, I was staring at a doll. He couldn’t be real.

“Are you kidding me? I look like a mess.” He laughed and it was like the heavens had blessed humans with ears just to hear the harmonious melody of his laughter.

He clicked his tongue “Beomgyu is lucky. He’s marrying this angel.” Humming he lifts the side of the dress warily but with ease. A light grin on his face when I leaned back at his proximity.

“Is he blind,” jokingly I ask Yuna but as I turn to face her, she is out of it. The dress lingering between her fingers, all control gone from the gaze of the tall mysterious man.

“No, yo- you are though.” She mumbles he chuckles a little helping me to the doorway, before winking and slipping past the doors. He was clearly much older and his hair was dark with locks of brown.

“Jungkook… he’s so pretty...” yuna was practically drooling at this point.

“You know him?”

YIXU© 2020 - All rights reserved

[allonsy-yesiwill]

Tis The Season: A Family Divided

WC: 2900 ish

Pairing:  Dean x Y/N

Warnings: a little bit of angst (read is an orphan but it didn’t happen till she was an adult and hit of crap parents) torwards the end but mostly just fluffy goodness

A/N: I tend to treat the English language like a garbage bin, in public I pronounce gym phonetically cause it makes people mad, and me smile. So please if you are an English teacher just pass on all of this... cause my tenses are timey whimy to say the least. That being said if you want to Beta, let me know I could use all the help I can get... hmmm, I guess that’s just a general statement about my life really..lol.  

Get caught up here 

The next morning Y/N woke up and packed everything up, she just had a bad feeling about the day and she couldn’t bear to ruin the holiday for the rest of Dean’s family. 

“Good morning cheer, you ready for the big Christmas eve brunch,” Benny hollers from the other side of the door. 

Y/N opens it with a sigh, “Please Benny, brunch happens at 11, this is breakfast. It’s still 9 am.” She laughed a bit, “Hey Benny if I ask you to do me a favor and not tell Dean could you do that?”

“Well it depends but probably,” he smiled.

“I don’t think today is going to go well and I don’t want to destroy the actual holiday for them, and by them I mean Mary, Jess, Sam and Dean. John can go fuck himself. I packed my bags, can you just put them in the car just in case?”

“Yes but I don’t like this, I know Dean’s not the best at standing up against his dad but he’s trying.” 

“I get it and I see it. I don’t love him any less for it. It’s just not going to change. I know I had a similar relationship with my parents. And to be honest with you I don’t even think this is about Dean anymore. It’s about my own unchecked baggage with my parents,” Y/N let out with a sigh. 

“Okay cheer, but please promise me you won’t leave the state without him. It would break him.” 

“Agreed.” 

As Y/N walked into the kitchen Dean stood up and pulled out the chair next to him. Y/N looked around the table and noticed that John was missing as Dean pushed in her chair giving her a kiss on the cheek. “How did you sleep babe,” Dean asked. “Well I am pretty sure it was more of a passing out thing after all of the whiskey,” Y/N said softly noticing that the family in the room was looking at them smiling.

“Well if you need a hangover cure, I make whip you up something that will make you feel better,” Sam laughed, “I’ve done it for Dean more than once.” 

“I am not listening,” Mary smiled. 

“No Sam I am good, some fresh fruit and some OJ should do the job. Do we have a nap time scheduled today? I will probably need one of those as well,” Y/N smiled. She couldn’t believe how welcome she felt, no judgement about her words last night. She was sure the family would take John’s side. 

“We can probably arrange for that sweetheart, right mom,” Dean said, giving her hand a squeeze. 

John joined them after about 20 minutes later, stateing that he just finished a business call and wanting to know the days plans where. John did not say a word to Y/N. Didn’t look at her, didn’t acknowledge her presents. He did however make comments on the events happening, stating that they were family only. 

“Well if you excuse me, I will let you get back to your family planing,” Y/N said standing up. 

“What’s wrong Y/N, the hangover got you feeling less than humans,” John asked with a laugh, “Ladies don't drink like you did last night.” 

“No sir, I feel fine however I know when I am not welcome and I don’t want to make thing more uncomfortable for the rest of the family. As far as the lady comment, well I don’t really want to be a door mat for men to wipe their shit on. Thank you for the hospitality and breakfast,”  Y/N got up and walked out of the room. Dean was calling her name and he began to stand up, however John grabbed his arm. “She’s not worth it son,” he said. 

“How do you know, you haven’t even given her a change. All you do is cast your stupid prehistoric views on her,” Dean let out. 

“I worn you son sit down or else.” 

“Or else what, you will disown me like Y/N parents did to her?  I know you ran a background check and I am sure you think I don’t know about her history, but I do. I know everything thing she has done, how she has made the world a better place. That’s 1000 times better than any of us sitting round this table, with the exception of Jess.”Dean smiled looking at Jessica. 

“I am sorry Mom, I am going to go make sure my girlfriend is alright,” Dean said while exiting the kitchen. 

He didn’t have to go far to find her, she had stopped around the corner when she heard Dean speak up. His heart broke when he saw she was crying, “ Baby I am so sorry, come here.” 

“Dean I am not sad, did you mean all of that. Like really or was just to make your dad mad?” 

“Of course I meant every last word of it. I should have stood up last night but I didn’t I am sorry.” 

“Dean no one has ever stood up for me like that,” Y/N said as more tears fell on her face. 

Dean wrapped her in his arms whispering, “I love you so much.” When they broke apart Dean took her hand and asked, “So pool house, Christmas movies. I don’t maybe Die Hard and Elf.”

“Oh Dean Winchester you know the way to this girl's heart.” 

It didn’t take long before Y/N feel asleep on Dean as he continued to watch christmas movies enjoying the close space they shared. Before the movie was over Benny walked Mary in, “Bother, someone is here to see you.” 

Well if it’s John tell him he’s not welcome and we if we need to leave we can,” Dean said louder than he intended. 

“Can I join you,” Mary asked. 

“Yes of course, sorry mom.” 

“You know I like her. She’s strong and feisty, just what you need. You also seem happy, and that makes me happy.” 

“Thank you, where’s dad.” 

“He went to work, I don’t think he wanted to be here. After you left Sam laid into him pretty hard about how he didn't like Jess when she first started coming around. That she just distracted him from the work. Give him time he will figure it out and if he doesn’t well I will come see you,” Mary smiled softly. 

“Yeah, I should have done this the frist night. I am an awful boyfriend.” 

“Son we all have our issue and she gets yours. Don’t feel bad about it, just make sure she knows you love her. Ah the Griswolds, should we make a bet that your father will cut off knob on the top of the stairs or that he will have to cut down a tree from he front yard.”

“Ha, well let’s hope it’s neither. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.”  They both laughed. 

“You know Dean, most families are like the Griswolds, they want everything to be perfect for their children and it’s impossible and not because we all have a cousin Eddy. There is no perfect in real life. Hell there isn’t even a normal, well outside of the setting on the dyer.”  

Mary stayed and finished the movie with them. Y/N woke up before the ending with both Mary and Dean making jokes about sleeping beauty. Mary let Y/N know that she fully excepted her at the family dinner and to be part of the family photo tonight, a Winchester tradition. Mary also let her know that a dress would be delivered for her an hour before the dinner. 

“Dean, please stay in the guest house for the rest of your trip. I know John will be less than pleased, but seeing your smile I just couldn’t say no.” 

The day was peaceful for both Y/N and Dean. It was the perfect christmas eve. When they hear Benny knock on the door they both sighed knowing dinner was close. 

“Alright kids, so Mary let me bring two outfits. However we talked and we really think both of you should go with this one,” Benny let out hand over a garment bag. 

“Oh my god what is this,” Y/N laughed. 

“Mary and I talked about it and it’s fun and joyful, that’s something she seemed to think you were Y/N and that she knows Dean is. She might have used the world childish.” 

“Ha, well you’re not wrong, I love it.” 

“Hey now, same team,” Dean laughed. 

The outfits where a matching over the top christmas print. Y/N dress and Dean’s suit were both a dark green, and decorated to make them look like christmas trees. 

Looking in the mirror Y/N admired their reflection, “ We look perfectly horrible, I love it,” 

“Well I think you got the perfect part right babe.” 

Before dinner the gathered in the living room around the tree. While John had yet to show up Mary insisted on taking pictures. Everyone loved Dean and Y/N outfits, Jess and Sam even suggested next year they all coordinate. 

As John walked into the room it was clear he disapproved of Y/N sitting on Dean’s lap. Lucky Ellen walked in around that time announcing dinner is ready. They all sat down a the formal dinning room table, Y/N was nestled on the corner next to Mary and Dean, far away form John. 

“Alright family, John will lead us in grace and it looks like you Sam are going to be the frist to say what you are most thankful for this year and what you look forward to in the next year,” Mary said. 

As Sam started speaking Y/N’s mind went off the rails. She was most grateful for Dean, but could she say that. But she had to say it, it’s true. There were a few other things on her list but Dean was on the top. She took a deep breath and listened to everyone speak before her it was her turn. 

“Honestly, I am so very grateful for Dean. Even when we were just friends he alway made me feel valued and that’s not something I am used to. It was also because of Dean’s help that was I able to mentor two homeless youths and help them get off the streets and be productive member of the community.” 

“That’s amazing Y/N,” Mary let out. 

“Was that Kyle and Abby,” Dean asked. 

“Yeah,” she smiled. 

“I, I didn’t know they were homeless,” Dean said with a sad smile. “Alright I guess it’s my turn. So I am most grateful to running into this quirky little bartend in NW Portland. I asked her out on a date more than once, she always said no. Then I started to hangout with her as friends and she showed me a world I didn’t know about. And how she was making the world a better place, also how I could make the world a better place. Y/N you inspire me to be a better human and I hope I can have a fraction of the impact you have had on this world.” When Dean finished he look and Y/N, and kissed her deeply and passionately. John said nothing. 

Sam’s boys went next and then it was John’s turn. 

“Well I love and I am also grateful for my family. But right now I am more thank for our private investigator Azazel. Because of him I know that Y/N over there is a gold digging whore. 10 years ago she was in a relationship Dick Roman and when that relationship ended he had to giver her 25k to get off the hook. It looks like her father set them up on a date, them being business associates and when it was all over her family disowned her. So clearly she’s just a whore looking for money. If Mr Roman couldn’t make her happy, I don’t think you can.” 

“Are you done John or is there more,” Y/N asked. 

“There is more, I knew your mother before she died. I didn’t know till well Azazel found it but I remember her. I remember her talking about  her freeloading daughter that never did anything to help the family succeed. She was ashamed and disappointed in you 15 years ago and I think she would still be today.” 

“Well clearly John you believe removing me for the picture is more important than your family's happiness so you would probably be a good friend to my mother. My father actually negotiated a deal for me to marry Dick. I wanted nothing to do with it. At first he was respectful however after a year that all changed. There was physical abuse and he would bring in his own medic’s to patch me up, there was rape that no one would believe when I went to the police. The only reason I am probably alive is because Dick’s lawyer saw what was happening and offered me a life line, Crowley. The first time I met Crowley my eye socket was shattered. Crowley has all of the evidence, the pictures of everything that happened. I just wanted to be free, Crowley got me my freedom and a lump sum of money. He is the only one who keeps that evidence incase something where to happen to me. When I was at Crowley’s my parents came for me multiple times and I didn’t understand why. It was then that Crowley found out my parents had pretty much sold me to Dick and Dick was coming after the money he gave them. Crowley helped me disappear into a bar in Portland where no one I know would find me. And with that I think I am done for this evening. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas Eve,” she said standing up and walking out. The dinning room was quite. Not a word everyone taking everything in. Dean new about Dick but not the physical abuse, she just told him about the mental and that Crowley got her off. 

The staff was never far off and Y/N was hoping that Benny would be right there, she wasn’t disappoint. “You’re bag is still in the car, would you like to go.” 

“Yes, please, “ Y/N said as tears fell down her face. There was no noise form the dining room. Nothing. Y/N figured Dean would need some time to over come his anger. She never told Dean about the physical abuse or rape because Dean is an accquatice of Dick’s and that would never end well. 

“Cheer, I don’t want you to be alone tonight, Jo has the night off and Ellen will be home soon. Can I take you there. Bobby will be over before the night is over.” 

“I would rather be alone but I don’t have any money on me right now so I am at your disposal.” 

“Y/N, no you aren’t. If you want a first class room in this town I can get you that. But we do like you and I am worry. Dean’s going to be worried. If he finds out I left you alone I would get a beating, cheer.” 

“Okay Benny, Jo’s it is.” 

When Benny showed up a Jo’s place he messaged Mary letting her know where Y/N was and that he wouldn’t be coming back tonight. Mary was grateful for the news and insisted that Ellen and Bobby go home early to spend time with their family. When Ellen walked in she brought a few more gifts into the house with her. Mary had a feeling that this might happened so she had packed a few extra gifts for Y/N and let Bobby know. 

“Well this is wonderful,” Ellen walked in to the room seeing Jo’s arm around Y/N while Benny sat on the floor beneath them while It’s a Wonderful Life played on the TV. “I have pie who wants some?” 

As the pie was handed being finished Ellen starts to hand out gifts. 

“What’s this,”Y/N asked, “I don’t need anything.” 

“Well no one needs anything, but you deserve it,” Ellen said, “We all open one gift Christmas Eve for a reason and I think you will find you’re very useful” 

As everyone opened their gift she could see they were all christmas pj’s and Y/N smiled. “ These are the best, but how did you know I would be here Ellen.” 

“I didn’t, these are actually from Mary.” And with that Y/N couldn’t hold the tears back. Mary had gotten her a gift incase she wasn’t there. There is so much thought and work, money makes it easier but she had never felt so love in her life. Ellen held her that best a mom could and let her cry her tears of joy. 

After presents there were more holiday movies and finally eggnog and a red wine hot coco. Bobby and Ellen didn’t have much room but Y/N was more than happy with the sofa. After the family when to bed, Y/N drifted off to sleep watching the fire die down wondering how she got so lucky and hoping that Dean was okay.

Next Part (will be out Christmas Day) 

You can entertain yourself over here with my other stories

TAGS

@akshi8278

[morgemuffel]

MALEC. ➰ INSECURITIES ARE HUMAN.

This story takes place between 3Bx14 & 3Bx15

I know Underhill has not been given a first name yet so I'll just name him Jack in my story. If the name gets revealed in season 3B, I will revise the text and replace the name. :) *(Part 1 of my series: our heart beats like one)

So enjoy reading & please remember English is not my mother tongue... :)

Sometimes I can't understand his reasoning, I can't understand him. Why can't I just understand his actions and be happy for him? He has regained his magic, well more likely he got a top-of-the-line dose of Lorenzo's and even that to a pretty lousy price. To the price tag of the loft. His home. My home. Nevertheless, I should be happy for him, but I just can't. Am I a bad boyfriend now?

Alec is lying on his bed at the New York Institute and has been staring at his white bare ceiling enormously fascinated for a quite bit of  time now. He never realized how uncomfortable his room was set up. The large room radiated more of a particularly than a cozy atmosphere. Everything looked rather cool. The antique furnitures were indiscriminately combined, the whole previous facility more functional than friendly and inviting. Not like if someone would really live here and feeling safe and secure while being there. Neither Alec's character was reflected nor did it somehow felt like his home. Home, that was the key word, Magnus' Loft was home, Magnus was his home. A part of Alec, just a tiny little egotistical part of Alec, had been looking forward to the loss of Magnus magic. He had felt an unintentional relief at the thought that he and Magnus now had a chance to get old together and the immortality issue would be out of the blue once and for all. But as soon as the thought had come so quickly it had evaporated again. He knew how much Magnus was suffering from the loss of his magic and it hurt him to see him like that. His magic connected him with everything around him and without it he felt like a stranger. In the body of a more than 400-year-old warlock without the electrifying feeling of his magic flowing through him like blood through his veins. So how could Alec begrudge him that feeling? Furthermore, it was not certain that the return of his magic had automatically resolved the mortality. But he was too afraid to ask him this question. This one question that burned like fire on his tongue. The fear that this little shameful part of him would gain the upper hand in a confrontation. He didn't want Magnus to know about that ugly part of him. And so he was back to the beginning of his thoughts, was he a bad boyfriend because of that?

All at once his cell phone rings and an unknown number showed up  on the display. Astonished, Alec answered the phone "Alexander Lightwood, head of the New York Institute, who am I talking to?" There was a moment of silence at the other end. Until the person cleared his throat. "Underhill here, well ahm... Jack." Alec felt a little stupid right now. Why did he have to answer so over-formally? Jack continued "I got your number from Isabel, After assuring her that I really only wanted to go out for a drink after work without any ulterior motives, she gave me your number." Ahm... yeah so, how about a beer? The first round is on me." "Alec tried to quickly sort the information inside his head: 1. OK then his cheeky sister Izzy just pulled out his private number 2. what makes her think that Underhill would actually go for someone like Alec? Alec blushed at the thought. Of course two gay men could also only be friends with each other and 3. Would Magnus see it that way too? What was he thinking, sure Magnus was not a jealous man. "Yeah, why not, Hunter's Moon at 8:00pm?" Jack laughed relieved. It almost seems like he wants to talk to Alec about something important. "Sounds great see you then." They said goodbye and Alec slips his phone a bit confused back into his pocket. He never really had friends apart from his brother Jace and his sister Izzy. Well there were still Clary and Simon. But Simon talked too much about irrelevant mundane stuff and Dustin Hoffman movies. Clary and him were just recently getting along maybe that would change in the future but right now it was more like a collegiate base. It would be nice to have someone who was just his friend, someone who knew what it was like to come out at the institute, someone he could talk to about shadowhunter-stuff and relationship issues and who'd actually understand him. Of course, Jace was his Parabatei and felt everything what Alec felt through their connection and tried to help him as best possible. But Jace, well... Jace, was still Jace at the end of the day and his advice, though well intentioned often not really helpful. With Magnus he could talk about all these things and he appreciated that. He had never opened so much to anyone but what bothered him now, had to do with Magnus and therefore he also dropped out as an option. So Alec was looking forward to hangout with Underhill, with Jack.

Magnus just left Hunter's Moon after his cheering-up-martini. He was feeling a little melancholic at the thought of his lost loft. But he was still convinced that it was worth it. At the end of the day it's just a thing and so he had the opportunity to look for a new home. That was always a lot of fun. He loves to have a look at new apartments and then set it up and decorate it again. He had the money and who knows, maybe he could even persuaded Alec to to paint the walls with him and pick out new furniture from catalogs? Maybe there was even a similar apartment in Brooklyn just waiting for him. And perhaps it was a sign? That the time to take the next step and move in with Alec has come. He had told Alec a few weeks earlier that it wasn't the time yet, that it's to soon.  They were together for about two months now but it felt like an eternity. He wanted to say yes that day when Alec stood there in Magnus' blue shirt when he looked at him expectantly, but he couldn't. He was too afraid and had never ventured this step with anyone before. With Alec he always discovered new needs, needs he never know that they were even there. What Magnus really wanted, no needed was waking up every morning beside his wonderful boyfriend, to lose himself in those beautiful hazel colored eyes, having breakfast with him, eating french toast on a balcony each and every morning, spend the day with him and wait for his return in the evening. For his return to their home. Home, Magnus smiled, yes he was ready for this new adventure.

Arriving at Hunter's Moon, Alec looked for the blond shadowhunter. He just missed Magnus who went out of the back door. Jack Underhill sat at the counter with a beer in his hand and waved to Alec. Alec sat down and ordered a beer as well. Magnus tried to familiarize him with the different drinks and wines but Alec was usually more confused at the end, that's why it was always up to Magnus to decide. He thought taking the same thing like Underhill would be the easiest. "Cool that you've  made it, Underhill started, I honestly asked you out for a reason ..." Alec frowned, and took a sip of his beer. Jack hesitated before he finally started. "I haven't been dating anybody for a long time now and..." Alec's thoughts were a wild mess now. "Oh by the angel, no I don't know how to deal with such a situation please don't say what I think you're about to say ..." Underhill took a deep breath and asked: Would you be my wingman tonight? Alec blushed, he wasn't expecting that. He has never been asked to be someone's wingman. Jace didn't need anyone because he was the master of flirting and now he's happy in a relationship with Clary anyway. What do you even do as a good wingman? Alec wasn't sure. Nevertheless, he agreed" "Okey, then and what did you have in mind?" he asked hesitantly. Underhill told him he just had to help him talk to a potential partner. "I don't know if I'm the right person for this job..."Alec said. Jack shook his head tentative. "Of course! if not you who else?" You got yourself the High Warlock of Brooklyn the Magnus Bane!" Alec grinned at the thought of Magnus. Although he wasn't the high warlock of Brooklyn anymore he sometimes couldn't believe it himself. Magnus wasn't only incredibly hot and sexy but also extremely funny intelligent and... oh, he shouldn't digress it wasn't about him now. But how should he help Underhill? Communication with other people apart from Magnus wasn't really his strength. Except he was drunk then he was according to Izzy *a babbling waterfall* "Well, let's try it, but I'll need two more beers first," Alec laughed.

Meanwhile Magnus opened a portal in the narrow alley behind the bar to get into the institute. Suddenly blood ran from his right nostril down to his lips. Surprised, he wiped his nose and tried to suppress the thought that wanted to spread in his head. Just don't think about it, then it is not true. He wipes his hand on the inside of his jacket and walked through the portal. Once there, he sets out to find Alec, he should be finished working by now. But he doesn't find him anywhere. As he passes the Armory, he sees Izzy and he decides to ask her about Alec."Isabelle, have you seen Alec? I wanted to surprise him with a dinner in Paris and talk about my... our... new living situation." Izzy looks at him sheepishly as she replies "Yes he is with Jack, I mean Underhill they went out for a drink." "Oh... Jack," Magnus says visibly surprised by this message. "Well then we'll have to delay this special occasion..."Izzy perky as always "don't worry about my brother, he only has eyes for you and I think tall, blonde and handsome is more like Clary's type." "Yes ... no no, I'm not jealous Isabel, do you know when he'll be back?" Izzy thought about it "naah, no idea tomorrow is his day off from that... I don't know. Magnus was undecided what to do next. He had hoped to spend the night with Alec in his apartment in Paris. Now he wasn't even sure if it's a good idea to open a portal again. Should he just wait in Alec's room? Yes, that was a good idea. "I'll just wait for him in his room," Magnus said. Izzy nodded and continued polishing her seraph blade. Magnus headed to the bedchambers of the institute until he reached Alec's room. He rubbed his hands happily when he got the idea to redesign the room. And so he was busy with his new project for the next few hours.

An hour later, the two men sat laughing, lolling and loot spying at the counter. So far, Alec had not found any of Underhills suggested men passable. Underhill: "How about the one over there at the pool table, the one in the white shirt?" "I mean he looks good... and I like the way he's stroking through his hair when he laughs... somehow cute." Alec: "Uh... really?" I'm not sure, he's a bit pale" he said with a shrug. Jack: "Well, not everybody can have a flawless tanned caramel-like body with perfectly defined muscles and silky smooth hair. Alec looked at him puzzled "you remember that you're talking about my boyfriend right? Underhill then a bit uncomfortable "Yeah sorry, but I mean Magnus is really good-looking even I can see that. Alec laughs and turns back to Mr. White-Shirt. He inspects him from top to bottom, but finds it difficult to find something about him that he would actually classify as attractive. Automatically, Magnus' Ideal Body appeared in his mind's eye and Alec started comparing the two men. He couldn't say if he would find the man attractive if Magnus wasn't his boyfriend. Hm... Okay the guy could play pool that was positive but otherwise? Alec: Well he's definitely not a Magnus, at the most a 6 out of 10 and he's good at playing pool, you like doing that too sooo...? Jack: "Haha, but I'm not looking for a second Magnus either..." he started but Alec interrupted him, "you wouldn't even find a second one he said in a played sulkily tone. Underhill "Maybe I should have thought this through." The two men burst out laughing again and so it goes back and forth for a while. As Alec's phone rings in his pocket. "Oh, speaking of which..., "heeeey baaabe... "he mumbles into the phone, smiling.

Magnus on the other side of the phone exhales slowly before answering in his casual tone. "Hello darling... I've heard you're out, uhm... with a friend and I wanted to ask you when you're about to be back..? I'm here at the institute, decorating your room a bit..." Magnus cursed inside that wasn't very subtle, he had told Isabel that he wasn't jealous and he meant it. Especially after so many centuries and several relationships, he had learned that, jealousy is just a feeling that comes from your own insecurity. And he knew that he could fully trust Alec but even Magnus was uncertain sometimes. Unsure he might be easy to replace? "Pssst... that's my boyfriend Magnus on the other end, could you all be quiet, thanks!" Alec rolled his eyes at the guests at Hunter's Moon and shaking his head as if it were the most logical thing that the entire bar has to be quiet when his boyfriend calls. Yes drunk Alec was here. Underhill could barely suppress his laugh as he tried to ignore the evil glares of the others. "Send your better half kind regards." Magnus heard Underhill whispering in the background. Alec returned to his conversation with Magnus. "Ahm... greetings, no a kind regards from Jack and I'll be on my way in about 15 minutes," Alec whispered lovingly into his phone. Magnus' heart on the other end began to throb wildly, oh he loved this Nephilim so much that it almost hurt and Underhill is a nice guy so get yourself together Bane. "See you then darling," Magnus replied and hung up.

After Alec has finished the call, the sentence which Underhill had told him a few weeks ago went through his head - Nephilim love once, fiercely - Yes, he couldn't look at other men without thinking about Magnus and his inner conflict made itself noticeable again. Now was the right time to ask Jack for advice. So he took all his courage together and just blurted out with it. "Hey... Can I ask you something serious about ahm... relationships...?" Alec asked. Underhill took a deep breath and stretched slowly. "Alright buddy go ahead." Alec started to tell him about his worries. He told him that he was hurt when he found out that Magnus had regained his magic today. Because he has the feeling that Magnus prefers to have his magic, be immortal and to outlive him. To forget him and one day simply replace him, instead of being mortal and spend like fifty years in the mundane way with Alec. He confessed to him that he thought the biggest hurdle in their relationship would be out of the world. Even though he wants Magnus to be happy at all costs, he doesn't know how to handle this feeling. "He could have died trying and did'n't even ask for my opinion you understand? And I dare not to ask him if he has now regained his magic and immortality, or only his magic and if I am unnecessarily maddening." Jack nodded slowly as he said "It's always best to start with yourself first." Let's talk about the immortality part..."

Alec was obviously feeling better after Underhill's speech and decided to get back reasonably sober with a lot of coffee and then confront Lorenzo at the handover in Magnus' loft. Nobody had the right to humiliate his Magnus like that and he would do anything, to make sure his boyfriend was happy again. The two men said goodbye and reassured each other to repeat this soon again. Alec walked towards Magnus' loft, the cool New York breeze blew in his face and he felt more sober after each block and more like himself again. He took the time to think about Jack's words. Alec had realized he was right about everything. He loves Magnus and he knew from the beginning that Magnus was immortal. He knew that one day he'd be old and that Magnus would probably just bee as young and alive as now. The new situation, whether temporary or not, doesn't change the fact that Magnus is a warlock. He was born as a warlock and his magic is a part of him as well as the immortality. Done.

The loft was unrecognizable. Alec went to the balcony and admired the view as he did so often before, as the door opened and Lorenzo entered. He had so much to say to him, wanted to yell at him, beat him but he tried to stay calm. Instead, he just asked quietly, "You really are despicable, aren't you? Lorenzo remained calm and replied only insolently, "Mr. Lightwood what a pleasant surprise. I didn't know you came with this apartment." And confessed that he just wanted to humiliate Magnus and put him in his place after all, he is now the high warlock of Brooklyn. Not Magnus. Mockingly, he added a condescending remark, "And the fact that he sent his little boyfriend to plead his case tells me I more than succeeded."Alec was seething with anger. Lorenzo forgot who he was talking to. Alec would teach him some manners. Lorenzo could play games with everyone else but not with Alec. No. "I'm the head of the New York Institute. Don't speak to me like that." For a moment he saw the fear in Lorenzo's eyes. Lorenzo said soothingly: "You're right." Perhaps this is getting unnecessarily heated." So Alec tried to negotiate with him offered to find him a better deal. But the warlock refused. He was only interested in referring Magnus to his place and playing out his new position of power. Alec had heard enough. You don't climb higher than you should otherwise you'll fall deeper than you'd like. And Lorenzo was getting too cocky. Alec lowered his voice as he spoke again "Enjoy this position while it lasts." The Clave doesn't take kindly to conniving, unethical Downworld... Leaders." He took a step towards Lorenzo and glared at him as he said: "You will slip up." And when you do, I'll be waiting there to take you down." With these last words he left the loft and thus a thoughtful and confused Lorenzo Rey.

Back at the institute Alec opened the door to his room when he realized, that he was probably still a little drunk, since he had obviously mistaken the room. He was just about to turn in between the door step when the shape on the bed moved and two cat eyes lit up in the dark and gazed at him. "Alec is it you?" Perplexed, Alec tried to spot the flaw in the room in the dim light. The furniture were the same but the walls had been painted in a cool shade of gray, black picture frames were mounted on the walls, with memories of travels he had made with Magnus. It looked like in an art gallery. A big plant was standing next to his desk and he slowly recognized the Scandinavian style that wafted through the room. "Maaa...gnuus, what have you done to my room...?" Alec laughed. He heard a giggle followed by a yawn."I was bored when I was waiting for you and well Nordic Interior Design is currently very trendy, you like it?" In that moment Alec knew he would never ask him. He didn't need to know the answer. The only truth he knew was that he loved this man with skin and hair. And that was all that matters. "I love it" Alec said. "And I love you, so will you finally join me my angel?" Magnus whispered. Alec liked it when Magnus addressed him with pet names, though not all of them were great, but most of them were actually really cute. He wasn't as original at them like his boyfriend and when he tried well... something strange came out of it. He has become friends with *Babe* it was not very originally but since he was the only one allowed to call Magnus like that it was enough. He undressed and slipped in something comfortable to sleep before he went to bed an snuggled up with Magnus. For a while they lay there quietly entwined until Alec asked into the darkness: "Magnus were you jealous of Underhill...? cause I wasn't sure but... " Magnus hesitated for a moment before he answered, maybe in an octave too high "Uhm nope, I have no reason to be." Alec laughed as he noticed the little lie and pressed Magnus even closer to him. He whispered in his ear: "We both know that there is no reason for jealousy but sometimes even I'm a bit jealous, I think that's normal." Magnus turned to look at Alec in surprise. His Alec jealous of whom? He could not imagine with the best of intentions who Alec even rudimentarily regarded as competition. "Please, who could you possibly be jealous of?" Magnus asked. Alec grinned into the darkness. "Good night babe."

[dontreadthistrashgarbage]

G O T 7 PT. 9

"You're a monster." Guerin hissed to Charlie as she did her best to blend in with the crowd.

"What?" Charlie asked, baffled.

"Look at this." She held out her hands to show Charlie the outfit that had been selected for her. A black sequence crop top with a roaring trex head and red pleather leggings announced her presence loudly despite the amount of people.

"... okay how is it different from what you usually wear?" Charlie was perplexed.

"You didn't think I'd maybe want to blend in a little more after making a scene about falling into the pool? It's also a bit over the top even for me come on." Guerin grumbled, folding her arms across herself.

"Well when you say it like that... I did intentionally pick something loud to cheer you up but I didn't think you'd ever want to just blend in. I'm sorry..." Charlie had a smile but her reasoning was sound and her apology seemed genuine, "You look great though."

"Thank you..." Guerin sighed, "Actually I'm sorry. I'm just sensitive cause... you saw Jackson..."

Charlie frowned, "I wondered about that... for what it's worth he seems okay right now." She gestured to the Chinese man who laughed suddenly loudly with one of his staff members.

Guerin shrugged, not fully convinced, "Hopefully he's not just burying it. He seemed so sad when we were talking. It would make me feel better if he wasn't that invested to begin with."

"Wow, Guerin, this is quite the look." Jinyoung sidled up to his girlfriend, sliding an arm around her waist and did nothing to hide the amusement on his face.

"Yeah it is. And where was your fashion sense while this decision was being made?" Guerin passed at him.

"I was playing with Eneoji. But I think Charlie did an amazing job." He said, not swayed at all.

"Well I hope she got fur all over you." Guerin faked a sulk, crossing her arms.

"Oh, she did." Charlie said, opening his jacket to reveal his now tainted black shirt, "It's why he won't take off his coat."

"Hey." He looked offended by the betrayal and pulled his coat back into place but Charlie just slid her arm around him and scrunched her face cutely in response.

"Wow, this outfit is..." JB said, sucking air through his teeth and cocking his head as he suddenly joined them.

"This is all anyone is going to say to me for the rest of the night." Guerin tossed her hands up in the air.

"I mean, it's very YOU. It's just like you with a magnifying glass." JB said squinting his eyes.

"Well I think she looks great." Charlie said, defending her friend.

"Great is..." JB trailed off with a squint. Guerin felt a blow to her ego as she waited for him to finish his sentence, but he was interrupted.

"Guerin, you look straight off a runway girl." BamBam said flirtatiously, appearing next to her suddenly.

"Thank you. But I feel like a lamp attracting moths." Guerin said self consciously, still curious as to what JB was going to say.

"You should wear that to the shoot tomorrow." BamBam said as Byoungjin and Tobio joined. Both of them glanced at Guerin but they were the only ones so far with the sense to not make a comment.

"Absolutely not." Guerin responded to BamBam. "But I guess that means we don't need to wear the same outfit as last time."

"No. If you actually bring an second outfit to change into that would be better." BamBam said.

Byoungjin and Tobio were waiting patiently by the group until Guerin realized they were waiting for an invitation. She quickly introduced them to the rest, Byoungjin already knowing Jinyoung, JB and BamBam but Tobio was new to everyone.

"Noona, what are you filming for?" Tobio asked curiously.

"Ah, it's a music video for the song I recorded with JB." She said, suddenly feeling very silly.

"I cant wait to see it." Charlie said, nudging her friend.

"Yeah, once you make your debut doesn't that make Byoungjin and Tobio your sunbae's?" BamBam cackled at the prospect.

"Does it?" Guerin let out a laugh too.

"You'll always be our Noona first." Tobio assured Guerin with a straight face, only a hint of humor in his expression. She winked at him in return. Her eyes caught Byoungjin looking at JB as though he wanted to say something, which caused her gaze to travel to JB's as the others continued to talk. JB was looking at her and when their eyes met he gave a coy smile. Her mind immediately went back to his unfinished commentary from before. Still feeling raw from her conversation with Jackson she knew she was being unusually sensitive, but she just looked away from him without returning the smile. Guerin missed his surprised and confused expression, but Byoungjin didn't. After the others continued to talk and Byoungjin and Tobio finally got a chance to start a conversation with JB, Guerin excused herself and pretended to leave for the bathroom. Instead she snuck a drink from the bar and headed to the back patio, settling in one of the chairs out by the pool. She played music quietly on her phone and relaxed back, allowing herself to dissociate a bit as she sipped on her drink.

"Here you are Noona." A masculine tone got her attention. Looking up she saw Minhwan and Gabriel approaching.

"Hey boys. I'm surprised you're letting Gabriel out here." She grinned at them.

"He's grounded. Seungbin is with Insu." Minhwan threw his arm around Gabriel whose pout was very obviously over the top fake. "Can we join you?"

"Of course." She sat forward, "Are you guys having fun?"

"Yeah, it's been fun meeting Minhwan-hyung and Byoungjin-hyungs uh... hyungs." Gabriel said clunkily, "They're a lot of fun."

"He likes BamBam the most." Minhwan rolled his eyes, "He high fived him for falling in the pool."

"That tracks." Guerin said in English, knowing HEET knew the slang thanks to her and Gabriel.

"Noona, we wanted to make sure you were okay." Gabriel said suddenly, "Byoungjin mentioned we should check on you."

"You have the subtlety of a bulldozer." Minhwan sighed to his dongsaeng but didn't contradict him and instead looked to Guerin for her answer.

"Aww, you boys are too sweet." She beamed at them affectionately, "I'm okay. It's been an emotional night so I just came out to decompress a little before enjoying the rest of the party."

"Can we help?" Minhwan asked.

"Mmm... no I don't think so. But if that changes I'll definitely let you know." She patted Minhwans knee appreciatively, "You're both good boys, thank you for checking on me."

"I can't believe you're drinking again." Said an increasingly familiar voice. Guerin's smiled faded a little as she looked up at JB and pointedly finished off her drink.

"It's called hair of the dog. Drinking a little when you're hungover is supposed to help." She shrugged and turned back to stare out over the view of the sloping hills the extravagant home was perched on, cicadas and other nightlife chirping through the darkness. "Besides. It's a screwdriver. The orange juice means it's healthy."

"Does it work?" He asked, cocking his head to the side and sticking his hands in his pockets.

She shrugged, "It does if I believe it. I don't know the korean phrase for it, but in English it's called the placebo effect and it's pretty powerful."

JB nodded and greeted Minhwan and Gabriel who suddenly looked very uncomfortable with the change in atmosphere but seemed unwilling to leave their noona just yet.

"Im Jaebeom-ssi." Gabriel said suddenly, very formal. The other three looked at him, JB looked curious, Minhwan seemed worried and Guerin was confused, "Please forgive me if this is rude, I'm a foreigner so it may sound strange, but I would like it if you were sensitive to Guerin-noona right now." Gabriel finished.

JB still looked confused and a bit surprised. He looked from Gabriel to Guerin, whose mouth had dropped open before she let out a nervous laugh and covered her mouth with her free hand. Minhwan panicked and slung an arm around the younger man, covering his mouth from the other side, forcing him into a bow alongside himself. "Jaebeom-hyung, I am so sorry for his words. He did not mean any disrespect."

JB shook his head and raised his hand, "I'm just surprised is all. Would it be alright with you two if I have a private word with Guerin-ssi?"

Gabriel looked at Minhwan sideways from over the older boys hand as Minhwan nodded in agreement, pulling Gabriel up with him as he stood. They bowed again as they left, Guerin waving after them.

"May I join you?" JB asked, waiting for her nod before sitting down, also looking out into the night.

"I was just thinking it's a shame we can't see more stars despite being so far from the city." Guerin said randomly. JB looked at her before casting his gaze upward, "The light pollution isn't as bad but the house it so well lit... I thought about walking downhill a bit to see better."

"Okay, let's do that." He patted his legs and stood up again, gesturing for her to come along. She hesitated, then stood with him, leaving her empty cup behind she followed as he led the way downhill until they couldn't see the house anymore, "This should be good, right?"

"I think so? Our eyes will have to adjust before we can be sure." She said.

"Okay." He sat down again and laid back, patting the ground next to him.

"Ohhhh you think you are so cool right now don't you?" She said with a chuckle.

"I am pretty cool, yeah." He grinned at her as she joined him on the ground. "But not cool enough." He said after she had settled. Guerin turned her head to look at him, "I think I upset you." He said with a frown.

"Yeah, I think so." She sighed and looked back to the sky.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what it was, but if you tell me what it was, I won't do it again." JB said sincerely.

Guerin groaned and gave a small flail rolling away from him suddenly, "Aaaahhhh its dumb though." JB had to press his lips together as he tried not to laugh outright at the sudden tantrum from the older woman. She sighed before speaking again, "Tonight's been emotional so I was already sensitive." JB's hidden smile faded, "But when you were being critical of my appearance earlier it really bothered me."

JB sat up suddenly, "I was being critical?" He thought back on the interaction trying to remember. Guerin peeked through her fingers at him. "Oh, oh no! I was teasing you, I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings! I like your style, it's unusual and fun. I admire that you aren't afraid of attention, but it seems so natural-"

"Okay you don't need to overdo it." Guerin interrupted, still peeking through her fingers. JB stopped and looked embarrassed, his ears reddening slightly but went missed in the dark.

"I'm being genuine." He said sounding a little defensive.

"I appreciate that. And thank you for explaining and apologizing." Guerin dropped her hands and tugged on his sleeve, pointing to the sky when he looked at her, "Look, can you see the stars now?"

He looked up, "Oh... yeah." He started to lay back, then stopped suddenly. He pulled off his oversized dark gray cardigan, tossed it across Guerins body, then laid back in only his tshirt to stargaze with her. Guerin looked at the cardigan then back at JB appreciatively. Slipping her arms through the sleeves rather than argue with him she enjoyed the soft material and his scent now surrounding her as they stargazed in silence for a few minutes, before they headed back to the party.

Guerin had arrived early and was doing what little she could to help BamBam set up as they waited for JB.

"JB-hyung said that coming out and seeing you fly Mihi for the first time inspired him to write this song." BamBam said as they chitchatted.

"Yeah, he was curious how I trained her for free flight." Guerin nodded.

"What did you tell him?" BamBam asked curiously.

"Well, the first part is building and strengthening the relationship. Before any flying can happen she need to actually has to want to come back to me. That means I need to be more exciting and rewarding than anything she may discover on her own. Any punishment or force someone might be tempted to use only damages that relationship. Then she learns the mechanics of flying, how to move through tree branches, the cue to fly, the cue to return, all protected and in controlled circumstances, until finally all we have left is actually trying free flight. In order for that to be successful is eventually just trusting each other and going for it. She has to trust me that I'll be here and be worth returning to, and I have to trust that she finds me worth returning to. You saw yourself sometimes things go wrong, but we work together to overcome those hardships and we can keep flying. I really do approach all my relationships with a similar mentality." She trailed off, seeing BamBam had stopped working and was looking at her thoughtfully

"Ah... sorry, I should warned you it was a long explanation..." she mumbled with a sheepish grin.

"Yeah it was long." He said unable to resist teasing, "But actually it gave me an idea."

"I'm not late this time and I'm the last one?" JB trotted up to the two of them.

"Hyung, just in time. Do you two have plans for the evening? I have a couple extra scenes I want to shoot." BamBam explained eagerly.

"I didn't have solid plans..." JB trailed off, glancing at Guerin.

She looked nervous but slowly nodded, "Yeah... I'm free."

"Perfect, let's get this first part going then." BamBam rubbed his hands together. "So for this part, it's like you're just getting to know each other." BamBam explained, "Guerin, you sit on that bench like you're waiting for JB, JB you're gonna jog up and you'll greet each other."

They followed his instructions, Guerin standing and they bowed in greeting as though they didn't know each other well yet. Guerin couldn't help a nervous giggle and covered her mouth before forcing herself to drop her hands, "Sorry." She said to JB, "This feels silly."

He quirked a brow and held back a laugh, "You're the one making this weird."

She stuck her hip out and placed a fist on it in an exaggerated manner as she looked up to the sky, "I have no idea what you mean." They both giggled at the ridiculousness of the situation. BamBam called for a cut.

"That wasn't bad considering the video won't have any of your audio. He teased and Guerin hid her face again as she giggled in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry! I'm not a good actor!" She called back.

"Let's take another one." BamBam replied with a knowing smirk.

They managed a few more shots, including JB running off to get them drinks from a vending machine and attempts to skip rocks, which Guerin turned out to be more proficient with than JB and she absolutely lorded it over him off script. He tried to grab her hand at her last throw prompting her to dodge away from him and it led to a short game of chase until he caught her as she rounded a tree and the two giggled until BamBam called another cut and they remembered they were being recorded and separated dutifully.

"You two should just date already." BamBam said daringly as he reviewed the latest footage. "I'm not even giving you direction on this and look at it."

"Ya." JB said with a warning tone, resting his hand on the back of BamBam's neck, "Don't embarrass Guerin-noona." Guerin surpressed a smile at his protective response, but she didn't blame BamBam for his comment. The footage did look like a genuine couple.

"Sorry hyung!" BamBam managed to shrug away from JB's grip with a grin. "Let's move on. Change clothes to your other outfits and move. We're gonna shoot the scenes where you're in an established relationship."

These shots required more direction from BamBam. There was more direct contact and physical closeness than Guerin was mentally prepared for. With the setting sun at the park they were shooting at the scene was romantic already. They held hands and walked arm in arm.

"Guerin, in this part I want you to trip, JB, pull her to you in a hug." BamBam instructed.

JB looked at Guerin, "Is that okay?" He asked, reading her expression.

She swallowed and nodded. The closeness they had been exhibiting all day had been for show but it was wreaking havoc on her very real feelings. JB had confessed his feelings for her already but while she liked him she still couldn't help but wonder if they would be a good fit. Still, it was just a hug right?

She was wrong. As she tripped on an imaginary obstacle he pulled her into his arms and she felt her doubts melt away. At first her head was pulled into his shoulder but they separated enough that her eyes met his. He blinked once, slowly like a cat and she inhaled sharply before biting her lip nervously to resist pushing more.

"Yeah okay that's good." BamBam brought them back to earth and they separated quickly, "We don't need to do that again." He sounded both innocuous and lightly teasing as he wrapped up the shot.

"Okay. Both of you go home and get ready like you're going out for a night on the town." BamBam instructed. Both of them looked at him questioningly and he sighed, "It's for my last second inspiration."

"Yugyeomie!" Guerin exclaimed happily, approaching BamBam and seeing his tall best friend with him, "What are you doing here?" The next part was taking place in the city, like friends going out for drinks.

"Hello Guerin-noona." Yugyeom responded politely with a shy smile and a respectful bow.

"Yugyeom-ah is helping with the shoot, I needed a third." BamBam responded to Guerin's inquiry.

Yugyeom was dressed simply but fashionably, matching the tone BamBam had requested Guerin and JB consider; to pick outfits for a night out. "You look so handsome!" Guerin gushed at the younger man who grinned at the compliment both flattered and embarrassed with the attention as he muttered a humble thanks in response.

"He knows he is handsome." JB's voice said in a teasing tone as he stepped up behind Guerin, causing her heart rate to increase and her skin tingled at his proximity before he put a few more inches of distance between them.

"Hyung..." Yugyeom whined with a pout.

"Oh he's just jealous that you're such a cute lil baby." Guerin cooed at Yugyeom.

"Noona, I am an adult man you know." He said turning on his devastatingly handsome charms.

Guerin crooned playfully, "Ooohhh yes I see that." While JB and BamBam visibly cringed causing Yugyeom to break character and hide his embarrassed smile by covering his face and dropping his head, "You might be a man but you look like a cute Yugy to me." She shook his arm cutely as he whined.

"Not to interrupt Yugyeom-ah's torment but we should get started." BamBam said as he reluctantly slid into his director role. It was fairly simple, Guerin and Yugyeom would be playing friends and they meet up with JB who would witness their closeness and have to react to it in his role as Guerin's boyfriend.

Since audio wasn't important she tried to keep her acting genuine by chatting and being friendly with Yugyeom who was clearly trying to be as cool and handsome as possible. They did several shots with them spotting JB and Guerin waving him over before BamBam paused after a take.

"Guerin, would you be okay hugging Yugyeom? That way it seems more obvious that JB has something to react to." He suggested, clearly dissatisfied with what they had gotten so far.

Guerin glanced at Yugyeom, "I'm fine with it if you're comfortable?"

"You've hugged me today already." Yugyeom pushed her shoulder playfully.

"Yeah but it's different on camera!" She protested, playfully punching him in the arm. He pretended to be hurt and Guerin played along with comforting him, missing the thoughtful frown on JB's face.

"Come on, let's get started." BamBam had to rein in his rowdy actors again. They apologized and got back into position.

They started off normally until Guerin comfortably wrapped her arms around the younger man in an affectionate hug after he did something she found cute. Looking up she made eye contact with JB who had entered the frame to his spot. She beamed seeing him and beckoned him over, but faltered seeing his expression. He looked very convincingly shocked and upset, but he walked over to join them. She took his arm affectionately and pretended to introduce the two before BamBam called for a cut and the three separated.

"I think that's the shot." He nodded.

They took the same scene from a few different angles before it was time to move on to the next scene. They all thanked Yugyeom for his help which he politely accepted, saying he couldn't wait to see the finished product.

"You'd think this would be the most comfortable one but it actually feels super weird." Guerin had been instructed to look like she was settling down for the night. She had showered and put on film appropriate pajamas, grey joggers and an oversized hoodie. Eneoji and Mihi were both in the scene as she sat on the couch. With her dog next to her and the severe macaw sitting on her shoulder, she sat back into her couch with her phone that was functioning as a prop.

"You're just expecting too much of yourself. You've been doing really well." JB said. He wasn't in the scene yet so he was just watching from the sidelines.

"All you need to do is act like you're having a text conversation that is upsetting you. You can pretend to be mad, annoyed, sad, stressed, all of it. Just go with it." BamBam said.

Guerin tried to slip into character, but she wasn't at it long before she got an actual text from JB. She couldn't resist glancing up at him but he was looking innocently down at his phone. Opening the message she had to keep from laughing. It was a picture of her with a filter that put her and Mihi in funny sunglasses. She had no idea how he had managed to get the parrots face to make it into the facial recognition.

"Guerin that's the one emotion I didn't ask for." BamBam directed. JB looked at her with eyebrows raised, still acting like he hadn't done anything wrong.

"Sorry." She glared at JB then looked back to her phone. She got another text from JB not long after. She furrowed her brow, refusing to look at him but couldn't resist taking a peak. This time it was a clip of Eneoji with a dinosaur mask on. She pursed her lips unconvincingly but managed her weakness without another scolding. Instead she texted JB back.

"You are so annoying!"

He responded with another image, this one was just a selfie of him making a ridiculous face. She outright laughed in surprise before remembering. BamBam sighed and Guerin launched into defense, "JB is sabotaging me! He keeps sending me funny pics." She sulked back.

"Hyung..." BamBam looked at JB with an expression of suffering.

"Sorry. Sorry I'll stop." JB said through a laugh he hadn't been able to contain after Guerin't outburst.

Despite the distraction the silliness had managed to relax her. JB messaged her again and she furrowed her brow, opening the message.

Whatever expressions she had made while texting with JB BamBam seemed to like. The last part of the scene involved her hearing a knock at her door, which is where JB came in. JB knocked on the door to get the timing right for reaction from the animals in the shot to look up, then Guerin stood, set Mihi on her perch and left the frame toward the door.

After shuffling the set up around to focus on the front door and putting the animals away to avoid distraction they continued with filming. Guerin opened the door to JB holding flowers and looking dejected. They did this several times, each time trying something different. The first time she just moved aside to let him in. The second time she leaned against the door and sighed before beckoning him in. The third time he was making a dumb face so she just shut the door again trying not to laugh. The fourth time she reached for his hand, gently holding his fingers as she raised her gaze to his. Meeting his eyes set her heart pounding loudly. She backed away and brought him into her apartment. Guerin was surprised she was able to hear BamBam call for a cut over the blood rushing through her veins.

"That was really great. Let's try for another like that." BamBam said as she quickly dropped JB's hand and moved away.

In the next take she held her arms open to invite him into a hug. He stepped sweetly to her arms, unexpectedly laying his head on her shoulder as he pulled her closer, like someone might if they were seeking comfort. She rubbed his back as though reassuring him but feeling his body against hers and his breath on her neck was becoming too much, so she stepped away from the embrace.

"I don't know about the hug, it makes it hard to see both of your faces." BamBam said looking at the camera with a thoughtful expression after the take, "Let's do another one."

The sixth take JB actually stepped closer to her first and took her hand. Guerin instinctively stepped back into the door but he was still alarmingly close. He had completely abandoned the apologetic expression he had been wearing before and she had to remind herself that they were supposed to be acting. BamBam called for another cut.

"That was a little aggressive JB. You're supposed to be asking forgiveness remember?" BamBam scolded his hyung.

"Ah, sorry I got carried away." JB said sheepishly, pulling away from Guerin.

"That startled me." She said, pressing her hand to her chest and forcing a laugh to cover for her reaction.

((((Tbc... this was so long ugh))))