#IT'S NOT EVEN A BLUE SCREEN IT JUST BLACKS OUT AND STOPS COMPLETELY IDK WTF IS WRONG
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I was checking my requests list to draw and there's one for Rocky and Zuma, but I drew these two so many times lately because they're my OTP I literally have no idea what to draw for them right now LMAO this one might take a little more until I have new ideas (or if I see something to get me inspired, I need inspiration, help)
Also my odd job as English teacher began this week so my posts and artworks will be a little less frequent for a couple months, but I'll try to still be around as much as I can, I still need to get done watching the series and get to watch the movies! I'm currently in the beginning of 7th season aaaaaaaaaaaaa
#I really need to work on my creativity it's so rusty#I'm no longer that same girl from back when I was a teenager just overflowing with too many ideas to draw them all#AND MY DESKTOP NEEDS TO STOP FUCKING SHUTTING DOWN ON ITS OWN OUT OF NOWHERE WITHOUT WARNING#IT'S NOT EVEN A BLUE SCREEN IT JUST BLACKS OUT AND STOPS COMPLETELY IDK WTF IS WRONG#I built this shit nearly entirely myself and Idk what's wrong wth#Oh well
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anyway i met bei honglin and he’s an actual angel and we don’t deserve him: a recap
also this is more than 5k words so like ! prepare yourselves!
fhdjjd okay so in april honglin’s hyh brought up his birthday party in his gc and I was like :——) that’s when spring sem ends I could actually make it
fast forward through a lot of encouraging by summer miss @91percentchaoze (sobs I rly owe summer my life) and a lot of anxiety about flights and a lot of other stresses in between
and June 2nd I’m in shanghai with mirthe miss @honglinsmacaroni and meggi and summer ie three of the cutest people in the world!!!
when we get to banana there were already other fans there waiting at the event space and the hyh was giving out seat numbers and stuff
so meggi was 10, summer was 11, mirthe was 14 and I was 15
and we started giving out the slogans and stuff we printed until the staff chased us out so they could set up
and so we were chilling first in Starbucks w the other fans fhdjjfjf they’re rly so cute I was finally able to put faces to weibo handles & they finally realised they were talking to someone who’s actually shit at speaking Chinese lmao
then when it got to 2 o’clock we moved outside near the entrance of the event space (since the event space was supposed to be open to us at 2)
but they got the time wrong and we ended up only being able to go in at nearly 3
which isn’t important anyway bc !!! we saw tangram walking in !!!
okay so we saw this white blob coming out from the main banana building and walking towards one of the side buildings and we were like
whomst
and it wAS JINGZUO JSDKAHFKJDH
and summer or mirthe waved at him and he was like bitch wtf and squinted
like ??? who the heckity is waving at me but then eventually he connected the dots and was like o yah fans so he waved back fhdchdkhcjdjf
and he just walked on what a king ??????
summer was right I was surprisingly more chill than I thought I would be fhdjfjfjjf I thought I would cry but I didn’t
so we waited around a bit longer, got suntans and sunburns and slightly dehydrated
and then honglin walks out
my god y’all he’s a whole goddamn angel he’s not real I’m telling you he’s unreal
I KNOW I said the last time that yanjun is rly unphotogenic and all the photos don’t do him justice but leT ME TELL YOU
THE ENTIRE BANANA FAMILY IS LIKE THIS THEYRE UNREAL
THEYRE ALL BANANA PEELS IN HUMAN SUITS THEIR VISUALS ARE ??? NOT HUMAN
but yah at first I was like o he’s gonna go through the back exit to the event space he’s not gonna come this way
AND THEN HE CAME THIS WAY
fhdjfjfj i didn’t take a video but if I did u would probs hear me go “o shit he’s coming” fhdjfjfj
and mirthe was like I’M GONNA TELL HIM UR WEIBO HANDLE I’M GONNA TELL HIM YOU’RE ASTROFIREWORKS and I was like NO so then we had a little back and forth for a while tHAT HONGLIN SAW FBDJHFJF
I don’t rmb a lot of it bc I was mainly in shock that he was in front of me so I was mostly like :——) heckie!
but he went through the front entrance and the moment he made it inside I lost my shit fbdjfjjff
mirthe sent a picture of me just kneeling at the entrance contemplating my entire life to the group chat fhdjfhdj apparently I said that I wanted to go home fhdjfjfjjf
and then zhixie and jingzuo came out soBS
ZHIXIE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IRL U DONT UNDERSTAND HIS CHEEKBONES ARE INSANE
also he had black hair again and the cuTEST HAT ON and we promptly lost our shit
Jingzuo,,,,, in a plain white shirt and blue jeans and converse,,,, someone PLEASE stop him
but they went in and we cried
and waited outside bc ruotian and chaoze still hadn’t gone in but then someone came to tell us chaoze was off filming for his show so he wasn’t coming & somehow ruotian had alr made it into the building without us noticing so eventually we all went in
and the chairs were so comfortable o my god they swivelled and they were like super squishy I love chairs
and then the best two hours of my tgm stan life started :—(
my god the moment honglin stepped on stage my entire heart melted he rly looked so good sobs
you’re completely right I’m dedicating an entire portion to his visuals
his eyes :—-( are so sparkly my god
and when he smiles his eyesmile???? he gets those rly deep wrinkles around his eyes and they’re actually beautiful????? ;;;;
he Radiates joy like i know i say this so often but their debut song??? radiant??? written For him,,,
also when he smiles it’s so warm like you find yourself smiling along bc he rly and genuinely means it and is happy and your heart just warms up bc he’s happy and i just
man i l*ve him
okay so the first segment zhixie was like “what do y’all love about beibei”
and everyone was yelling different things like “he’s so handsome” and “so talented” and “his vocals” and someone also yelled “he can eat a lot” and zhixie was like ??? bro whAt
also someone said “he spoils his fans a lot” and my god y’all it’s so so true but more in that at the very end of this recap
I couldn’t even say anything rip bc my entire brain was set in English and I was like ???? my god i wrote an entire post about the reasons I l*ve him but my mind is blankity blank
but then he was like well beibei’s great at pick up lines
so he did pick up lines based on scenarios zhixie gave fhdjfjfand most of them were old tsk
but he made up this rly cute one that went like 看花开不如看着你发呆 ‘people like looking at flowers bloom, but i’d rather look at you daydreaming’ and i UWUED SO HARD
and I didn’t realise this until meggi pointed it out after but when they put the scenarios on screen, they used a gender neutral “TA” instead of the gendered 她/他 ;;;;;
then they did this segment where honglin was supposed to go against three fans and do a tongue twister in the shortest time and in order of time they got to choose foods under cloches
honglin did so badly fhdjfjfj he got last place but idk if he did it on purpose so his fans could win
one fan got wasabi disguised as ice cream and zhixie was like EAT IT and honglin was like DONT
and he offered to eat the wasabi for her I’m sobbing he rly is so sweet
but zhixie was like NO SHE HAS TO EAT IT and everyone laughed bc he was so adamant fhdjfjfj i love zhixie with my entire soul
and thEN honglin goes okay y’all know how I posted that picture last night
(this picture)
my god I died when he posted it bc
1) I love that shirt what an expensive look
2) he was baking ;A;
and he made a half-baked cheesecake s o b s
he was like: “since i’m always posting vlogs and y’all always watch me eat I thought I’d make food for y’all this time” and I WEPT
and he was like oh give me a theme and i’ll decorate the cake around that theme
so they pulled out the box again and he picked random numbers
and they called out 4 and 15 and 27 to go on stage and I was like
wow I wonder who they are omg
and suddenly summer’s in my ear going MY GOD 15 IT’S YOU
me:
me: what
zhixie: STOP DREAMING IT’S YOU
me: WHAT
hdsflgkjhdfkhgjdsfgkhksfgkdjhdfgkjhsdgjh
and the entire time i was mouthing to mirf and meggi like I CAN’T SPEAK CHINESE I’M GOING TO GO UP AND FORGET THAT I’M BILINGUAL I’M GOING TO BE BYELINGUAL I’M
and they were mouthing back sPEAK ENGLISH and i was like oK
and then it was my turn and i was shaking so so so hard ????
like i’m so so so bad in front of crowds i’ve shaken my way through every marketing presentation ever bc i hATE public speaking and now i have to go up in front of two angels?????
mirf and meggi were like THAT’S ASTROFIREWORKS and i didn’t realise until i checked the group chat after that zhixie said yAY KJDHSKSJAHKJA
and summer was like SHE FLEW IN FROM NEW YORK kjdshfkahdgjfhagjd
and zhixie was like wait do u speak chinese
and i blANKED OUT I WAS LIKE YES BUT FAM NO
but he only took the yes and was like ok thaNK GOD I DONT HAVE TO TRANSLATE
inside i was like fAM WHO THE HECKITY DO U THINK TRANSLATES YOUR VIDEOS I CAN DO IT FOR U KASJDHFLSKJDHKH but outside i was just ah yes :—)
and zhixie and honglin said something about english but my mind was blank all i could do was stare at honglin like
y’all
i know i said he was unreal but
up close
he’s literally ??? a whole angel like ????????????? his eyes sparkle so much when he laughs my heart STOPPED
and when they asked me to step closer i was like
actually i can translate for u i’m-
and zhixie was like NO THERE’S NO NEED like akdsfhkjkjdshJKASDHK OK
then honglin asked what theme i wanted and i was likE FAM IDK I’VE BEEN BLANKING THE ENTIRE TIME STARING AT YOU
so i was like okay i know u rly like one piece so something maybe one piece related
and he was like fam that’s difficult sadjkfhalsKJSDHLKJASD
but the moment i opened my mouth
zhixie: ARE YOU SINGAPOREAN OR MALAYSIAN
me: uh i’m singapor-
honglin: uwu i can hear it
me: about to die
zhixie (in english): ur accent !
and god yall my entire heart burst into flames like
i’ve said it before here but i’ve spent quite a bit of time being ashamed of my accent bc when i first got to america nobody could understand my singaporean accent and everyone kept asking me to repeat myself and eventually i was like ok u know what it’s better if i just shut up and not talk
and so the reason why i’m so so so proud of zhangjing (and jj) is bc there finally is ?? some south east asian representation and there are even people complimenting his accent and calling it cute and it ?? finally felt like i shouldn’t be embarrassed about the way i speak??
zhixie: when i heard you i was like eh? it’s almost like i heard you zhangjing
and i
Cried
and then zhixie turned to meggi and mirthe and were like yall come from beijing?
like fam what
and meggi was like no we come from belgium
zhixie: malaysian? you?
about ten people correcting him: belgium
zhixie, again: malaysian?
kajsdhflasjdkhfkj
and then zhixie said some other words but yall i was
just watching honglin
his hands are so so so so beautiful like his fingers are rly nice and
his nose ??? work of art
also his hands looked so soft like :—(
he was just bent over the cake and he :—( rly truly a goddamn angel
summer took photos of me that i’m never releasing ever sakdfhaksjdhfds i look so COMPLETELY WHIPPED FOR HIM LIKE
and at one point he started plucking cherries and one stalk fell on the floor and i was like o no so i went forward to pick it up and he
looked up
and said ‘oh it’s okay’ and smiled and
my heart stopped i think i left my soul on stage
O SHIT OKAY AND THEN ZHIXIE WALKED OVER AND WAS LIKE
CAN I ASK WHAT YOU’RE THINKING U LOOK LIKE YOU’RE LOSING UR MIND
AND I WAS LIKE FAM U DONT UNDERSTAND I A M
and i was like ‘idk i’m just ?? very shookt’
and zhixie was like what??? shy????
me: 很惊讶 (very shocked)
zhixie: shy? ? ??
me, thinking: fam this is how i feel when i translate yall captionless vlogs
zhixie (in eng): is this ur first time seeing honglin?
me: my first time seeing you also !!!!!
zhixie, suddenly shy: ah okay thank u
UWU!!!
and then honglin was done and looked up and i might have died inside again
AND HE WALKED OVER AND I WAS LIKE FAM NO DONT IF YOU COME CLOSER I’M LITERALLY GOING TO DI E??????
and he was like ‘oh this is zoro’
the sane part of me: oh wait ur favourite character is zoro???
bc liTERALLY TWO DAYS BEFORE HE POSTED ABOUT SANJI AND SO MY SISTER AND I WERE LIKE OH HE PROBS LIKES SANJI
BUT HE
LIKES ZORO
(my sister, afterwards: wtf i feel lied to)
but he was so heckin close to me like fam my heart
stopped
honglin: i hope u like it uwu
me: heck !
honglin: take one bite!
me: HECKITYHECK
zhixie (in eng): i wanna see ur facial expression
aND THEN THEY WERE BOTH LOOKGIN AT ME LIKE FUCABJS,BCD
FUCINADJCNSAKJDKJ
honglin: is it okay? ;;
me: FUCIJNSKCSADJ YES TAKE MY HEART TAKE MY SOUL
and i finally FINALLY FUNIAJKNSSK FINALLY GOT OFF THE GODDAMN STAGE
zhixie: WHERE’S HER APPLAUSE
anD EITHER RUOTIAN OR JINGZUO UPSTAIRS STARTED CLAPPING AGAINST THEIR MIC LIKE ASDFAHKSDHFAKSJD SHUT UP
AND I WANTED TO DIE I WALKED ITNO A CARDBOARD CUTOUT RIGHT AFTER BC I WAS SO SHOOK
and honglin was like be careful! there’s a cardboard cutout right there! bc he’s a whoLE ANGEL
but also like GKASCKASHDHFAJDSHLFKJ PLS STOP LOOKIGN AT ME PLEAS E MY HEART IS WEAK I’M
my god
collapsed into summer’s arms right after thank god for summer !!!
okay then the next segment zhixie was like o yall know honglin’s position in the group is main vocal so next he can sing something for yall
honglin: actually i prepared an entire song for yall but music copyright means that i can’t sing it w a backing track
bc if he sings w a copyrighted backing track or if he sings more than half the song the livestream video would have to be taken down or something??
but it didn’t matter bc the moment he opened his mouth my entire heart STOPPED like
if he stabbed me in the stomach it would have hurt less his voice is so so sososos ososososososoosososo beautiful ????
and he sang without a backing track to like ????
i’m telling yall he’s a whole angel like he’s not real
and then honglin was like oh i also prepared another song but bc i now see there are overseas fans here i’m gonna sing an english song
and he sang when i was your man by bruno mars and when he hit the high note i think i ascended into the afterlife
about the 46 minute mark here i RLY AND TRULY RECOMMEND LISTENING TO IT SOBS HE SOUNDS LIKE THE PERFECT ANGEL HE IS
AND ZHIXIE HARMONISED AT THE BACK LIKE AHHHHH THAT’S MY BABE MAIN VOCAL TAGTEAM RIGHT THERE
and then zhixie asked if there was any other song we wanted and i was immediately like JJ!!
i’ve been ??? pleading for a jj cover forEVER ND HE
FINALLY PULLED THROUGH
honglin: i’m going to do Those Were The Days bc like the song says (那些你很冒险的梦 我陪你去疯 - all those adventurous dreams, i’ll chase them with you), i’ve been chasing my dream and yall have been here with me every step of the way
and i think the moment he said it i DIED like ???? jj is one of my favourite singers and nearly all my faves have covered his songs at least once, astro included???
and everyone who knows me knows i love jj like nini miss @tanqram has literally made a tangram singing jj compilation that i watch religiously ??? and this is one of my fave jj songs?????
and the moment he opened his mouth like ???? i KNOW i said that i died the last two times he sang but
firstly he sounds so much like jj?????
and secondly everything was ???? perfect??????
like i judge jj covers hard bc i’ve listened to the originals so many times everything is ingrained and the moment something is off i cringe but
yall
honglin’s perfect honglin is Actually Perfect
ALSO HE SOUNDS SO MUCH LIKE JJ LIKE HE RLY WASN’T LYING IN HIS IP INTRODUCTION
and afterwards honglin was like lol jj said before that whenever he sings high notes he starts sweating and immediately jingzuo (???) was like TAKE OFF UR CLOTHES LKAJDHSFKASJDHFK
jingzuo chaotic good!!!
also i didn’t know until afterwards when the fantakens were out but ruotian was eating chicken wings and slurping noodles the whole time upstairs aksjdflhaksdjfhaksj why is didi line chaos
and then zhixie was like yall know what other things beibei is good at?
like fam he’s good at everything we rly can’t
also someone in the back was like he’S GREAT AT DOING THE SPLITS and honglin’S FACE AJSDFHKSJDHF
but it was languages and so zhixie was like we’re gonna make him say i love u in many different languages
and i could FEEL marta miss @honeyforzhixie�� going ????? isn’t that ur thing zhixie jsdgflasjdhf
and so they started discussing languages and zhixie was like o i know u can speak a little japanese bc i know u memorised the entire one piece theme song
and i SCREAMED INSIDE bc we literally juST TALKED ABOUT IT THAT MORNING WHEN WE VIDEO CALLED NINI nkfhakjsdhf we were like uwu we hope he sings a jj song but then we were like o lol what if he ended up singing the one piece theme song instead bc we bet he knew the whoLE THING AND HE DOES KNOW IT AJSDFHLAK
but then zhixie made honglin imitate maotong and say ‘i love u’ the way maotong would and my heart ached a little i miss my baby boy so much ??
but JINGZUO CHAOTIC GOOD JSDHLAKJ ‘could u imitate chaoze too’ jaskdlfhkjd
and so he did a couple different versions like Japanese (he and jingzuo screamed lines from one piece at each other ajdkhflksd) and korean (he took a line out of some korean drama?????)
and someone suggested french (was it mirf?????) and i lAUGHED rip his french vlog sorry honglin i swear i love u !!
and then they were like ok time to play his fan video
okay listen i have to preface this by saying that when i got the brief from the hyh she told me ‘it’s best if we make him cry!’ and i was like ok! sure!
turns out it made ME cry i stressed out over the video for two entire weeks sobs the moment my finals were over i locked myself into nyu’s computer lab until moving out day but still couldn’t finish it so i had to work on it on the plane ride home too sobs my roommate connie miss @ynajun saw the worst of it bc every time i came home from the lab i’d stress about it ???
but my god it was worth ??? everything ????
he ?????? cried??????
and like on one hand i’m happy that i managed to fulfil the brief but also i feel bad bc he cried but also mostly i laughed bc he’s such a sweet emotional bub
BUT ALSO BC HE CRIED MEGGI GOT TO OFFER HIM HER TISSUES!!!!!!!!
like we specially bought tissues before we left for banana bc we were like we’re gonna need them bc we’re gonna cry
BUT IT TURNS OUT HONGLIN NEEDED HTEM MORE AJSDKFHLASJDHFKAJ
zhixie: he cries every year during his birthday
zhixie: but also even when it’s not his birthday he cries he cried at my birthday too
and afterwards in chaoze’s birthday post he called honglin a crybaby too UWUWUWUWU
tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat he thanked us again for the video and i Died
okay this next part is purely speculation bc i honestly might just be overinflating myself and he might have done this purely coincidentally but when he thanked us for his video he looked at me and i ?????
when the video was playing nini and marta were yelling in the gc that they knew the video was done by me bc i overuse cc particle world on after effects jasdhlfksjdh but in that moment i briefly entertained the thought that he was familiar enough with my edits to know that the only idiot who keeps using cc particle world was me ??
but also as i said purely speculation and probably coincidence so
anyway you can watch it here
and then they played the birthday video messages from fans and i think i died from embarrassment let’s Not talk about it
but also i only realised it after they pointed it out in the gc but apparently zhixie and honglin were both singing along to the jj backing track i added to my video ajsdfhlaksjd
my god another tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat we were talking about the videos we recorded
and hh (one of honglin’s og fans she’s a whole angel too I love her !!!!) was like my gOD i rly am so unphotogenic (when she filmed her video she put a ‘FAT’ over her face sobs but like mood) and i was like yah same lol i had to record myself like ten times in times square bc i looked so bad in all the takes
and honglin was like HH WHY DID U CENSOR UR FACE UR CLEARLY SO CUTE and we collectively died for her uwu !!!!
then honglin rePLIED ME SAYING ‘OH BUT TIMES SQUARE HAS SUCH A GOOD VIBE’ and i died for the nth time ??? and then he followed up by saying ‘i rly want to go to times square i’ve gone to america a lot of times when i was younger but i’ve only ever been to the west coast’ jksadhlfkjshekj pls come i’ll bring u around east coast best coast
but back to the point he was like ‘i’ve said it before during ip (and he did!!! during the fanfan episode where he was talking to the rubbish bin he rly has said it before!!!!) but i rly try my best to remember every single person’s face and all my fan’s weibo IDs’ and my heART MELTED HE
and then it was his ending ment!!
he said something that rly threw my heart off a cliff he said that he’s so grateful for the hyh and fans for listening to him and donating to charities in his name instead of buying him extravagant gifts bc when he makes it big, if he makes it big, the thing he wants to do the most is to donate to children who come from a less privileged family background bc he knows what it’s like coming from a single parent family and ;n;
then they showed wishes from other idols!!!!!
there was wang ziyi, zhou rui, the twins my ip hEART
LISTEN I ??? when zuo qibo showed up my SWIN HEART EXPLODED I ??? MISS ??? MY SWIN ANGELS ????
AND THEN RUIBIN SHOWED UP IN ALL HIS UNKEMPT AND UNSHAVEN AND RAMBLING GLORY AND MY PRINCERUIBIN HEART WEPT I THINK I HELD SUMMER’S ARM SO HARD SHE GOT BRUISES AJKSDHFKSJD I’M SO SORRY SUMMER I LOVE U
and then cHAOZE APPEARED !!!! and everyone immediately melted he’s the softest leader alive i love my baby!!
and honglin was about to say something but ruOTIAN
ruotian showed up w a cake w sparklers???????? like fam???????
and eventually we had to say goodbye :—(
but honglin was like o i rly and truly thought that there would be lesser people at this birthday than there was last year and my heart ??? broke ????
bc the room they were in last year alr was so small and there were rly little roses but he ??? genuinely thought he had so little fans that he wouldn’t even fill up the room ;;;;;;;; bc there rly are v little active roses both on weibo like there are less than ten of us who actively post in his chaohua and at tgm events like they’re mostly lrt/jjz fans and there’s usually only one rose ;;;;
but listen honglin our entire gc would die for you we will never stop loving u until every last one of us is found dead in a ditch
and then we’ll love u into the next life
also after he said goodbye he was like sike!
he kept singing behind the cardboard cutouts and peeking around them to say hi again
at some point I poked my head over and went PLS COME TO NEW YORK and he said something back that I alas couldn’t hear rip
and then he started singing along to jj again sobs
but eventually at some point they left via the back door and I was like GOTTA GO THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT I’VE BEEN TRAINING FOR sobs going to the airport for yanjun and wenjun and jeffrey and ziyi and kunkun rly was to prepare me for one thing and one thing only and it was to practise getting good non-shaky fantakens without dying???
jingzuo rly truly looked AMAZING he rly rocks the white tee blue jeans and converse look jingzuo stans stay winning!!!
and honglin ;;;;;;; was holding my banner ;;;;;;;;
and he looked directly into my camera a couple times sobs and he shot hearts too I rly ???? Editing the photos made me cry so many times fbdjhfjf every time I got to those photos I lose my mind
ALSO ONLY AFTER EDITING THE PHOTOS I REALISED RUOTIAN WAS JUDGING ME SO HARD GHDJFJ my eyes were glued to honglin the entire time but looking at the photos again ruotian looked so unamused fhcjfhfbfhbf
speaking of ruotian my gOD editing photos with him in it is a nightmare y’all he’s either blinking or looks like he’s about to sneeze in nearly every picture fhdjfjfj summer and I generally make it a rule not to blur other members’ faces out of our fantakens but ruOTIAN RLY TESTING ME
but we made it to the banana lobby and I didn’t want to follow them and their fansites in so I stopped walking and honglin turned back to wave at me ;;;;;;;;;;;;;; and i think i died again
and so I went back to the event space where summer and mirthe and meggi were waiting and sat down and blanked out sobs
but it diDNT END THERE FHDJFJJF FOR SOME REASON HONGLIN DECIDED TO WALK OUT AGAIN A BIT AFTER
so mirthe and I were like omg gotta blAST so we speedwalked over
and he :—-( saw and shot signs at my camera again fhdjfjfjjf I ???
and then it was Actually Over god I was a shell of a person after that
still am tbh I’m not sure how I survived sorting through our 2000+ fantakens fhdjfjfj
but I’m so spoiled y’all I’m really truly so spoiled by him :—(
like I said earlier he rly spoils his fans so much????
that night he posted on Instagram and immediately summer and meggi and mirthe and I commented and he replied all four of us ;n;
earlier on in spring semester there was a third party event that Tangram was invited to but the organiser was a MESS and tgm wasn’t treated very well??? but honglin was worried that the fans who travelled to the event and didn’t get to see them were upset so he came into the group chat to console them ;;;;;
and I was talking to another fan and she said that even during other events he kept turning around to wave at the fans and acknowledge them and it’s ;;;;;; as someone who has ?? waited in the rain / stood for hours waiting for idols something as simple as a nod or a smile rly warms u up and makes the wind and cold worth it ;;;; and he makes sure to do it all the time ;;;;;;;;;
on his birthday !! his birthday !! when he was in Taiwan and should be resting and enjoying time w his mum and not thinking about us !!!! he still came into the group chat for an hour and talked to us ;;;;;;
and he named all his sort of more well known fans’ IDs, even the ones who weren’t online and sending messages at the time ;;;;; like he rly wasn’t lying when he said he remembers us ;;;;
also fhdjfjfjjf god I’m so spoiled he replied me so many times ?? like there was the times sq thing and the east coast thing ???
and when he said he was training for the next archery competition I was like “o are u shooting recurve or compound this time?” and he was like “o idk if I shot recurve or compound but it’s the one I shot the last time” and I fhdjfjfjfhfb
tangential but 1) my god y’all his form is beautiful my archery heart: exploded
2) his rhotics are so beautiful too my phonology heart: also exploded
also when he was about to leave the gc I was like “huh but u just got here, why are you leaving?” and he sent another voice message “astrofireworks, why are you becoming shameless too, when did I just get here, I’ve clearly been here for a long time already” fhdjfjdjfn fhdjjd
also my GOD He was reading some IDs and summer and lyla were like what about @astrofireworks and I was like fchjfbhjdf y’all it’s ok he’s alr said it in another voice message two months ago in the gc I’m alr so spoiled I ???? rly shouldn’t ask anything else of him or he’s going to hate me
but then he
sent
a whole
nine second message
“hey astrofireworks, I hope one day I can go to New York and maybe... I’ll meet you there, okay?”
and I ??,?? Sobbed
ndjdbfjvcchhxhdhfh
and then Connie went to send him off at the airport in Taiwan the next day and ?????
I’m not gonna say much because it’s rly conno’s story to tell and I’m not sure how much I’m allowed to say outside the gc but he rly spoils his fans so so so so much ????
anyway bei honglin rly and truly is the sweetest boy on earth we rly don’t deserve him ;;;;; this first week of June truly has been the best week of my cpop stan life and i ????? love mister bei honglin with my entire heart and soul ;;;;;;;;;;;;
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Things I Love About Stray Kids (2/∞)
a/n: hello, this is gonna be a series now because 1) I’m really happy this week, like I legit haven’t been this genuinely happy in a long time and 2) I love them more than I thought sO HERE WE GO AGAIN!
Chan
okay, this is sad but, the fact that he believes he’s the only one who carries the team? he’s blaming himself for the eliminations and didn’t even want to rejoice with everyone else because he wanted them to forgive him first. like no chan, it was never your fault--you already do so much for the team and everyone knows that. but it’s definitely admirable
HIS FRIENDSHIP/RELATIONSHIP WITH THE REST OF JYPN IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL, PUREST THING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD U G H HE’S LIKE THE LITTLE BROTHER OF EVERYONE WHILE HE’S ONE OF THE OLDEST IN HIS GROUP LIKE YES WHAT A CONTRAST IT’S SO CUTE
that *O* face he does is super cute yo
hiS CURLY HAIR IS S U C H a look
“i really love you guys”
^^ gave me a heart attack
HIS HAPPY CHEESY SMILE ALSDFJLASDF THAT COMPLETELY LIGHTS UP HIS FACE
his awkwardness lmao
hello can we have a mini series of chan’s kitchen please
Woojin
“HI HELLO”
^^ HE ALREADY SAID THAT MULTIPLE TIMES AND ALSDFJSD SAME BC IDK IF THAT’S A REF TO DAY6 OR NOT BUT THE WAY HE SAYS IT IS SO CUTE
yo his killing parts in aLL THE SONGS S I G H
i love watching him perform
um, his model poses are--ACTUALLY ALL OF HIS SELFIES AND NON-OFFICIAL PHOTOS ARE SUPER CUTE YO HE’S CUTE
giving his pizza crust to chan slkfjdasfd
HIS FOREHEAD YO
that dark blue, red cuffed plaid flannel he wore last ep? A BLESSING
he seems so insecure ever since the “not a main vocal” criticism and like? he’s working so hard? so fill up his role because he feels like he doesn’t uphold it? like idk what “not a main vocal” means but i just want everyone to appreciate how much he’s taking care of himself to improve
Minho
HELLO MY BABY IS BACK AND GONNA BE IN THE CENTER FOR THE DANCES AND BE SLAYING YO THIS ISN’T EVEN THINGS I LOVE ABOUT SK ANYMORE IT’S ME YELLING ABOUT MINHO’S FXKN COMEBACK BECAUSE DO YOU SEE THE TEASERS FOR NEXT WEEK--SUCH AN AMAZING DANCER I LITERALLY CANNOT TAKE MY EYES OFF OF HIM
SUCH A POWERFUL VISUAL HE ALREADY GOT TWO FANSITES--HYUNJIN IS SHAKING
he, can dance to Lie, Begin, Dope, Blood Sweat and Tears, Spring Day, idk probably all BTS songs w h a t t a l e n t
HE EVEN APPEARS LIKE THREE TIMES IN AN OFFICIAL BTS PHOTOBOOK LIKE I STAN A LEGEND
okay but also, we have to talk about that brown jacket/striped shirt look he wore last ep bc it iS C U T E
he’s also that lowkey weird that if you don’t catch it, you won’t know so he passes off as the normal one of the group and it makes it x4837234 more funnier
did I already say this a millio--I LOVE EVERYTHING AND EVERYTHING AND EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM
him giving up on Felix’s Korean
also, the fact that his earrings are just these black circles and tbh it’s sorta hot b y e
bonus: i miss him so much and i really really really i need more content of him and get to know him better before i combust
Changbin
is so willing to help everyone in the group oh man he’s so kind
doesn’t even get mad when everyone picks on him and just goes along with it
I KNOW EVERYONE HAS SAID THIS BUT IT’S AMAZING HOW HE COMPLETELY DESTROYED HIS “DARK CONCEPT” IN THE FIRST EPISODE AND NOW EVERYONE IS JUST LIKE “CHANGBINNIE YOU’RE SO CUTE I LOVE YOU”
goes with the flow of things so well--he gets along with everyone pretty nicely and I think that’s pretty cool
“AH”
tbhlowkeysortadonewithjypbutthatsjustwhatithinksodontquotemeonthis
H I S B O Y F R I E N D O U T F I T S man changbin stans how you doin
what was that extra pose when taking a picture like klasjdflskadf
WHAT WAS THAT POST ICE SKATING DATE PIC WITH HIM ON THE TABLE
Hyunjin
PHOTOGRAPHER!HYUNJIN MY ABSOLUTE FAVE CONCEPT
like laying on the ground for the perfect angle? wHAT A MOOD
wait, fanboy!hyUNJIN WHEN HE JUST OBVIOUSLY STARES AT JINYOUNG OH MY GOSH YOU COULDN’T BE LESS OBVIOUS I LOVE THIS KID
how he wants so badly to improve? i really admire how much effort he’s putting into his rap and it’s really amazing to watch and hear the improvement since hellevator
“YAH”
he seems like he has his life together and has a pretty nonchalant facade but seeing through the cracks of his insecurities makes him so human and like him so much more than i think i would?
HE’S ALWAYS DANCING HONESTLY THAT’S SO CUTE WHAT A NERD
UM HIS GIGGLES GET ME EVERY TIME PLEASE STOP A T T A C K I N G ME HONESTLY
ASKLDJF GOTTA BRING THIS BACK BUT WHEN HE JUST SLIDES AND OPENS HIS MOUTH FOR CHAN TO FEED HIM WAS SO FUNNY I’M NOT OVER IT
Jisung
that fKN KILLING PART IN YOUNG WINGS LSKADJFALSDF AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
THE LITTLE GIGGLE HE DID AT THE END OF STRAY CUTS 4
he’s so bright and happy and optimistic everyone needs a Jisung in our lives
casually just smushes his face into the camera so i can see his pretty eyes duh thanks kid
okay but when he was singing that parody of Don’t Wanna Cry he did this little thing to his vOICE THAT SOUNDS SO AMAZING I CAN’T GET OVER IT LIKE LAKSJDFLASDF WTF TA L E N T
he’s so annoying i love him asldkfjasdf like idk if i like him behind the cam and annoying his members or on screen doing something weird honestly probably both
THAT PICTURE CHANGBIN TOOK OF HIM BITING THE CHAIN LSKADFJSDF EWWW LMAO
WOAH WHEN WE SAW A GLIMPSE OF PRODUCER JISUNG THAT WAS SO COOL
no but seriously? he’s so optimistic and supports everyone and he’s so wonderful and kind and super talented but i think we know that and s i g h i hope ya’ll appreciate this mess of a boy bc OH MY GOSH I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT I LOVE BRACES JISUNG HAHAHAHHAHAHA
Felix
honestly, i really just like his black hair and i think ya’ll should know this
he’s such a hard worker?? when he showed us the time at 5 in the morning--I have a feeling he stayed up that long rather than waking up at 5 kid don’t do that it’s not healthy but! he’s doing so much and it’s amazing
OKAY BUT LIKE, THAT PLOT TWIST OF THE CENTURY WHEN HE TOLD CHANGBIN TO KISS HIM LIKE ALSKDFJSLDF MINHO WAS SO READY TO STRANGLE HIM ONLY FOR HIM TO BE LIKE “hyung kiss me” alskdjfasldf what is with him
“annyeonghaseyo“ in thAT DEEP VOICE OF HIS BABY OH MAN WHAT A WAY TO COME BACK
his orange smile laskfjdlasdf
him adjusting jeongin’s outfit was so cute hehe
the way he clings onto jisung is super cUTE UGH THEY’RE LIKE ATTACHED BY THE HIP AND IT’S SO CUTE idk if it’s bc they’re a day apart so they’re like “WE’RE TWINS NOW” or bc jisung can speak english apparently? something like that?
i think people forget that he’s more than just a meme and a deep voiced boy? i love watching him practice dancing in the background and like? he’s part of dance line? LET ME SEE HIM DANCE MORE OMG
ASKLDFJSDAFL WHEN HE MESSED UP ON THAT ONE WORD AND MNET HAD TO EDIT IN THE MISSING CHARACTER ASKLDFJSD THAT WAS SO FUNNY YOU WERE SO CLOSE KID
Seungmin
HELLO THIS IS MY UNDERRATED BABY WHO DESERVES THE WORLD bc he’s funny as heck guys why do you not notice this
honestly im gonna say it agaiN: HIS FACIAL EXPRESSIONs especially when he has that dumb dazed look askldfjasdf what a boy
messes around with Jeongin in the back
when he cornered jeongin u H
he writes things in his journal to improve! and he is!
i really hope he stands out a little bit more when he performs! i hope he’s working on it! but I also like how if you are a seungmin stan, you’ll notice the small things he does when he performs and it’s like a little secret only people who deserve to know, knows and he knows it’s just between him and his fans saklfjsadf
when he decides to be a lil sht like that one time chan and hyunjin was arguing and he’s just like “we’ll take three ramens and a packet of dumplings” or something like that
can i just say that his clothing style is probably my favorite because i gush about each outfit he wears like all the time?
he’s so into singing and you can see it every time he does and it’s wonderful
Jeongin
WHEN HE WAS CRINGING BECAUSE OF HIS PARENTS: WHAT A MOOD
WHEN HE GUNNED HIMSELF BECAUSE OF JISUNG’S KILLING PART: WHAT A MOOD PT 2
WHEN HE ESCAPED JISUNG’S WRATH AND RAN TO THE OTHER SIDE AND CHEEKILY WAVED AT HIM: WHAT A MOOD PT 3
his escalator impression was hecka nice
OKAY WE BARELY SAW IT BUT LIKE? THE FACT THAT PEOPLE ARE FINALLY PRAISING HIM BECAUSE HE SPENT ALL THOSE TIMES PRACTICING BY HIMSELF TO STRENGTHEN HIS VOICE I’M SO PROUD OF HIM
this baby always has a smile on his face and it’s the most infectious smile ever and i love him i love him please stay as happy as you can be because you deserve everything and more
*screeches* HIS BANDANNA LOOK IN SCHOOL LIFE KLASDJFASD I LOVE IT SO MUCH
when he was all shy shy with all the girls screaming his name at the busking: tag yourself i was the girls spiritually yelling his name
hAH I ALSO SEE THE BLACKPINK FANBOY IN HIM OHOHO THAT’S SUPER CUTE
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Chapter 17 aka “Dune”
SPOILERS are sprinkled around extremely liberally for The Property of Hate
Masterpost here
RGB: oh fuck
That’s… that’s actually really neat. We get confirmation soon that everything in this world has color as blood, not just RGB. So, you can actually see it in this tree stump- idk if that’s how sap actually works but it’s a cool as hell visual
That’s a neat way to highlight how FUCKING UNNERVED AND AFRAID RGB IS SEEING THIS BULLSHIT
Oh fuck. Oh that is really not good. Oh no. oh god it’s a domino effect. No trees means nothing is holding up the sea which means the darkness can’t do anything on its own. This is gonna ripple back to the market isn’t it. Oh god
With the sea collapsing like this, Click may get released from his watery grave quicker than imagined…
YIKES
Ok, at least it stopped and stabilized. For now. buuuut that particular exit is completely unusable now
HEY WAIT A MINUTE *rewinds a few pages* YEAH REMEMBER THAT HUGE SCHISM CRACK FROM REALIZING RGB’S MURDERED MANY HEROES AND BEING TOLD TO SHOOT HIM? Yeah that shits GONE now
How the fuck? That hasn’t happened before. Hero’s had to sleep to heal her schism in the past.
AND ITS COMING BACK? One page after they’re out of the darkness and that schism is starting to think about making a reappearance. WHY THO
CONSIDER THIS: darkness ALSO has healing properties? Whereas total Light will burn, scorch, and white you out from existence, total Dark will hide, conceal, and heal you.
Then again, Hero’s schism didn’t heal on her first journey through darkness to get to the Market
So... more likely it was something to do with their bonding in the last chapter, or- or even though the Nightmare gave her a bad scare, it is still technically a DREAM, and dreams whether they are nice or scary will still heal you up a bit? Interesting if true. Alternatively, the sheer proximity to that literal blockade of dreams was just so, many and potent that Hero didnt even need to be asleep for them to work a little magic on her
I still think I’m onto something about Darkness also having healing effects, however! Consider the evidence:
RGB was fucking WRECKED right before Negative come out to play way back in chapter 6. Just utterly destroyed. He was COVERED IN BURNS from being PUNCHED ACROSS A FIELD and then his circuits got ELECTROCUTED. But Negative doesn’t have any of those injuries, and neither does RGB once Negative has finished his job. Negative, confirmed to be Made of Darkness, heals RGB from whatever dumb-fuck nonsense he’s gotten into to make Negative have to step in
EVIDENCE #2: that black residue Hero leaves from being impaled on the sick tree. Just because RGB believes nothing they did contributed to the tree’s revival doesn’t mean that’s entirely true. If Hero somehow left behind a lil bit o’ Darkness in the tree, then maybe it might have thawed a little/slower on its own even without the Butterfly also melting away the [—–]
One last, slightly off-topic thing before we get back to continuing the actual chapter, people produce soft lights and flowers when they sleep, right? and those flowers fade away once they wake up. RGB’s never done that, but Negative spawns blue roses that break apart when he’s done his business. My point being... RGB doesn’t dream. If he only ever actually asleep when Negative is awake?
RGB’s overabundance of color comes into play once again
“this sand is stained by the blood of dead trees” wow I did not remember this section of comic being as metal as it is
Wait the fuck a minute. Hold on. Hold- hold on
RGB IS A FUCKING COLOR BLEED PUN
RGB’s explanation is great for why this place is littered with husks of vehicles, but let’s think about what else probably ends up here, all those objects of sentimental affection and names- laptops, favorite pens. stuffed animals! The Sands are like a junk yard. and things occasionally get washed into the Sea, or the Sea washes them up here... just a cool cycle overall
SPECTACULAR TEAMWORK LOVELIES KEEP IT UP
back on the schism- its definitely much better than when they left the Market, but worse for having exited the Darkness. its more of an impression of a dip that a gaping wound right now
OH. So, yeah the sun piece will probably run into its brother whilst in the ocean, but RGB’s right- it probably went there in order to be hidden over other reasons
BUSTED
RGB: you did WHAT? You SOLD your FINGERS? Without TELLING ME? What made you think you could go and do that, I would’ve handled it!!
Hero, remembering that time she saw RGB rip his whole hand off and give it to an owl he met 2 seconds ago: I mean…
Yo can we… talk about RGB’s entire train of thought (LMAO) here? That he’s upset about Hero trading away parts of herself but doesn’t really give a fig about doing the same to himself? He’ll sell off buttons or an entire hand, but Hero gives away two fingers for a friend and he’s upset that she didn’t let him know, because he’d have handled it? On one hand it’s very “adults being horrified at children having to take on responsibilities and experiences they shouldn’t have to” which I am always about, yet on the other hand I’m getting a “RGB really doesn’t value himself much at all does he” vibe and yikes my heart
Like, between the self-worth issues touched on here and “maintain illusion of control and confidence by saying big words smartly”- same fucking hat. RGB needs to stop being relatable
“saying HUGE words, just INCOMPREHENSIBLE LETTERS when angry” is also. Yup. That’s uh. That’s me. goddammit
...... for me, this is what i would personally call the Nightmare Scenario
YOWCH that looks like it hurt. At least the good news is RGB will be able to recolor himself over a bit of time. Not sure if he’s also able to regenerate indelible lineart, so… better just not have to find out
also; that’s literally a train of thought. Why’s it colored like Negative, though? Is this a train made of Darkness?
YUP it’s a Darkness-cloaked train- how fucking weird must this look on Hate’s side?
Fdhafjk I forgot, they have NO IDEA what happened to Click. Amazing
what.... in the fresh hell is going on in this panel
BUT, super interesting implication that Hate can’t LEAVE this place, and that without Dial to get audio, or him/the Butterfly to go out and interact with things, Hate is very hands-off
but honestly wtf is the slanted speechbox? “this side of the script”??? i love it but what does this mean
RGB points out that charging through the sands like this should be destroying it, yet it remains perfectly intact throughout all of this, even when BURROWING INTO THE LITERAL ERASING SANDS. Interesting implication that Darkness can’t be erased. Interesting implication that Negative would be entirely unaffected by sand as well
IS DIAL EATING POPCORN? HOW
Who wants to bet this is gonna be an inkwell
AND DIAL IS LET OUT OF HIS CAGE!
Who the fuck would be the third party that’s sent this hell-train out to scoop up and deliver our heroes to them?
The idea that the kidnapper has at least once before been a kidnapee is just so funny to me. HOW DOES IT FEEL RGB??
(war flashbacks to THIS MORNING when RGB: broke into song, rocketed himself across the market via explosion and a slingshot, and wouldn’t stop making puns the entire time) my man is a ball of stress but damn if he isn’t able to react in the moment
The good news is RGB’s color regen process is pretty slick- his back’s already back to normal
Your humansona’s a real Jackie Chan madman isn’t he RGB. a real Tom Cruise motherfucker. Some Buster Keaton level shit.
I SHOULD SINCERELY HOPE SO, you’re wearing like TWO lucky objects on your person currently. If that can’t give you even a smidgen of stat-boosting...
now CHECK THIS OUT: it seems like RGB starts running into weirdness BEFORE he charges directly into the dream-infested car. A film-reel overlay effect, and lookit his hat- negative stripes of shadow
Chiaroscuro: “the effect of contrasted light and shadow” created by light shining in weird ways and directions. interesting chapter title to use, uncle mod, on a chapter which has got the pure whites of the erased desert/Hate’s realm directly contrasted with tree stumps and this weird, darkness train
Don’t you hate it when you run directly into a gas cloud of dreams
So we got a jewel (a box?), white and black hands, the iron again, a teardrop shape, what might be RGB’s Mystery Button, all with film reels
And speaking of that iron, we also get the fiery sharp shapes again… which morph into S’s. it’s a sound. a SSSSSSSSSSS
I just had to go look up what an iron actually sounds like and… yeah. It makes an SSSS sound
Human RGB is… unfairly handsome. Of course he is. AND I SEE THAT TV IN ON THE LEFT MOD
Hey wait a minute
That’s not my bastard man
NOBODY in this comic has spoken in ANYTHING other than black or white colored text. and now here is this ancient MEMORY MAN speaking in ORANGE?
well actually the ‘co-worker’ is speaking in like really dark maroon? BUT STILL
“we split” has returned, 15 chapters later
The duality of these two title pages is really something- past and present getting whacked awake, the similar position present RGB has fallen to mirror past-human-guy, going from the Light of the memory to the Darkness of the train
ACTUALLY, RGB didn’t even LAND like that. he fall on the floor like THIS. he’s SHIFTED to reflect the decayed, old, deteriotated and fragile memory currently playing out in his head
AND CHECK OUT THOSE NEGATIVE-STRIPE GLITCHES! WOWIE! Lots and lots of foreshadowing to the upcoming Neggy appearance coming very soon to a screen near you!
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