#I've been reading fics. Heaven forbid they hold hands

[coff33notforme]

Housewife!Ghostface

A/n: I decided to write this impulsively at 2am because I've been holding onto this idea for a while now. If you guys like it I'd be happy to do a part two of these headcannons or even a full fic, just let me know!

Synopsis: Modern Au with Danny Johnson where Danny has made himself comfortable as your full time housewife!

Pairing: Housewife! Danny and Gn! Reader

Housewife! Danny who wakes up before you, so that he can breakfast for you before you go to work

Danny knows all of your favorites by heart so whatever you want to eat, he’s got it down, he’s already accustomed to what you prefer to have 

Danny melts whenever you give him the slightest bit of validation or approval for his hard work, you know how hard he works to please you 

Housewife Danny spends most of his day cleaning up around the house, doing simple chores like vacuuming, doing the dishes, making the beds, sweeping ect. 

Tidying up the house for when you return home, he only wants the best for his lover of course 

Though he also leaves occasionally to run errands, grocery shopping, picking up orders from around town, among other things 

But he makes sure to keep track of time so he can come home before you so that he can cook your favorite as well as wash the blood down the drain

When you return home from your long day at work Danny is there waiting to greet you with a welcoming hug, and after a tiring day Danny's strong arms embracing you against his soft, plush chest is the closest to heaven you think you’ll ever get

He’s already set the table of course with your favorite meal hand prepared by Danny himself

Over dinner Danny’s very inquisitive about your day, he’ll listen to you ramble on and on about one specific coworker whos been bothering you lately, or how you got there exactly on time, or maybe even a compliment your boss gave you

Whatever you want to talk about he’s all ears, or maybe you had an exhausting day and all you want to do is relax 

He’s got you, he’ll offer to give you a message, or start up a bath for you, maybe if your feeling up for you and him could watch some TV in the bedroom, anything you want to watch  

God forbid anything happens to you, if you ever come to Danny even slightly distraught he’s engulfed with rage and this is one of the only times you’ll see Danny's face shift from the warm smile he offers you to something cold, something dangerous that you can’t quite read

Though he’ll assure you he’s not upset that way his eyes show a glimmer of fury you doubt his words though you never say this to his face

He’ll never pressure you to talk about anything but he is pushy for names, if you're hesitant about giving in to his requests he’ll start sweet talking you until you give in 

“Please my dear, I won’t do anything without your say so, but I need to know who brought my angle to tears, just let me fix it love.”  

Though you do find it strange how seemingly out of nowhere the co-worker who had been bothering you stopped coming into work only a day after Danny had interrogated you

You’ve only know Danny to be a sweet, charming, man who wants nothing but the best for you and he’s given you no reason not to trust him, so how could you think anything of it but a coincidence 

Though you never know what Danny really gets up to when he does his errands, what you don’t know won’t hurt you right?

After all he’s grown attached to the role he’s been given as your Housewife <3 

Comments and Reblogs are appreciated!

[barbitone]

HELLO!!!! i'd just like to tell you how thankful i am for everything you've written for capri ;____; berencel is my ride or die ship (aside from lamen of course!) and i've reread so many of your fics – which is why i'm reaching out to you now, since i JUST reread your space au and am currently going to start on your ballet au, which i'm sure i'll enjoy. uhhh that's it!!! i hope u are safe and healthy in these trying times! :)

Thank you so much for the lovely comment!!! I’m glad you’re enjoying re-reading fics :) Hope you like the ballet AU!

In light of the quarantine, I figured I’d share the beginning of my latest fic, which is a sort of regency AU and is basically an excuse for Berencel to just... flirt a lot, I guess

The cool night air on the patio was a relief after the bustle of the party inside. Berenger leaned against the railing, closing his eyes as he breathed in the fresh air and the blissful silence while he waited for Parsins to bring the carriage around.

If it were up to him, he’d give all such events a pass. Alas, his status did not permit it. He had to show his face sometimes, if only to remind the other scheming aristocrats that he was still their liege-lord.

He winced when he heard the door opening and schooled his features into a neutral expression as he listened to the approaching footsteps, resolved to ignore their owner. No doubt some merchant or minor nobleman come to try and win his favor, or try to wheedle out a trade deal, or an extension on their tax payments, or-

“Do you have a light?” a lilting voice asked.

Berenger sighed inwardly, annoyed. He’d already put on his riding gloves and wasn’t about to take them off to accommodate some boorish dandy who couldn’t be bothered to carry their own lighter. He’d meant to say as much, turning. 

“I-” he started and was immediately drawn up short by a vision of a man dressed in a fine green satin jacket. Even in the moonlight his hair was red as flames, and his plump lips were pursed in a smirk that wouldn’t look out of place on a siren, luring sailors to their deaths. He was certainly as beautiful as one, and probably no less dangerous.

He was holding a cigarette between his pale elegant fingers.

“-certainly,” Berenger finished, pulling off one glove before slipping his hand into his pocket to retrieve his lighter. He lit it and cupped the flame with his free hand, offering it to the young man and watching with bated breath the way his dark eyelashes fluttered when he leaned in.

“Thank you,” the stranger said with a faint smile. “Would you care for one?” He offered a silver cigarette case and Berenger shook his head before forcing himself to drag his gaze away from the man’s lips, wrapped sinfully around the cigarette. He put his glove back on as the stranger took a deep drag.

“You don’t like parties?” the young man asked. He turned to look out into the garden, the moonlight catching on his emerald earrings. Nobles rarely wore such lavish jewelry, and the lower classes couldn’t afford it. Berenger knew instinctively what the young man was. A high end rent boy, no doubt on retainer for one of the rich widows floating around back in the hall. 

He was the prettiest Berenger had ever seen; generally he’d found the widows preferred a more masculine sort. The young man was certainly the most well spoken, even though Berenger could detect the hint of a lower-class accent in his speech.

“Not as such,” Berenger said, turning to look into the garden as well. “And you?”

“I find it all quite exhilarating,” the youth said. “The food and drink, the lavish surroundings, the entertainments.”

“Oh yes,” Berenger said with a wry smile. “And the company, I’m sure.”

The youth laughed, taking a drag off his cigarette and blowing out a thin stream of smoke that dissipated slowly into the night air. “In truth,” he started, leaning closer and lowering his voice, “I find the company a bit tedious.”

“Do you really,” Berenger said, amused. “And that’s why you’re out here. Escaping.”

“Perhaps,” the young man said with an enigmatic smile.

They were standing quite close- close enough to invite scandalous rumors. Berenger found himself not caring overmuch. As a dedicated bachelor he was quite used to rumors, and this was a far more pleasant situation to spark them than most he’d been involved in.

“Is it working?” Berenger asked.

The stranger laughed, shifting so their shoulders nearly, almost, brushed together. “So far I’ve found the company out here to be far preferable to what I left behind,” he said, holding Berenger’s gaze as he flicked his cigarette butt into a rose bush below.

“The grounds keeper won’t be well pleased to find that come morning,” Berenger murmured, smiling despite himself.

“I don’t imagine so,” the young man said with a wicked grin. “But I think I’ll get away with it this time. Unless you intend to tattle on me?”

“Heavens forbid,” Berenger said, utterly enchanted even though he knew he shouldn’t be. “Even if I wished to betray you so terribly- I don’t even know your name.”

“Maybe we should keep it that way,” the man teased. “A guarantee that my crime will remain undiscovered.”

“Ancel!” someone cried out and the stranger- Ancel- let out a put upon sigh.

“Alas,” he murmured. “The jig is up. And so terribly soon.”

“I’d been wondering where you’d- you’d-” an older portly man said, coming closer and setting his hand low on Ancel’s back. His eyes fell on Berenger and his speech came to an abrupt stuttering stop. “Lord Berenger!”

Berenger regarded the stranger cooly. He was some third rate horse merchant, not one that Berenger was well acquainted with. Luis? Leon?

“No!” Ancel said with a gasp, widening his eyes in a decent approximation of surprise. “Not the Lord Berenger!” 

“The very same,” Berenger said, tightening his lips so he wouldn’t smile. He was certain now that Ancel had known exactly who he was from the start. This was some sort of ambush, and Ancel its lovely architect.

“What an honor to make your acquaintance,” Ancel said, his eyes twinkling mischievously. “And what a fortuitous coincidence.”

“I’m sure,” Berenger said.

“Why, my cousin Louans here has been been talking about you non stop!” Ancel continued.

Cousin, Berenger thought, barely containing a snort. It seemed Ancel was an entirely different sort of rent boy than what Berenger had initially taken him for. It wasn’t an uncommon arrangement between men of certain inclinations. The faint veneer of familial relation served as a way to justify why a gentleman might suddenly acquire an attractive housemate. 

Still, it didn’t make sense for someone of Ancel’s caliber to waste his time on a man like Louans. Ancel was clearly expensive, and Louans was just a merchant.

Berenger found himself looking at Louans with fresh appreciation. Maybe the quality of his goods had gone up and his business was thriving...?

“Lord Berenger,” Louans said. “I’ve been meaning to speak to you about a lucrative investment-”

Ancel laughed brightly, cutting the older man off. “Oh, cousin,” he said sharply. “Surely you don’t mean to bore Lord Berenger with business matters. This is a party, after all.” He smiled and leaned in to set his hand on Berenger’s arm, just above the elbow. When next he spoke his voice was low, seductive. “Forgive my cousin,” he murmured. “He tends to get ahead of himself.”

Ancel was flirting with him, and right in front of Louans. Berenger revised his opinion of the merchant once more. However he’d lucked into an arrangement with Ancel, it wasn’t because he was suddenly smarter or richer than he’d been before.

“Lord Berenger,” came Parsins’ pinched voice. “Your carriage is ready.”

“Thank you,” Berenger said, not taking his eyes off Ancel, still watching him. Louans made a small badly-concealed noise of dismay. Ancel smirked.

“What a terrible shame,” he said, lowering his eyes demurely. “And we were just getting to know one another. Perhaps we can continue this conversation at a later time?”

“Perhaps,” Berenger said, taking a step back. Ancel’s hand slipped from his arm and he found himself already missing the heat of him. But he knew better than to pine for what he could never have. “Farewell,” he said before turning to follow Parsins away.

“Lord Berenger,” Ancel called after him.

Berenger couldn’t resist the call, stopping and turning back.

“Have you given thought to where you’ll be summering?”

It was a trap of some sort, a trick. He didn’t care, so long as Ancel gave him an excuse to see him again.

“I have not,” Berenger lied. He’d intended to to spend the summer working, as he always did, splitting his time between Arles and Varenne.

“Lord Rouart has opened his summer villa to a few select guests,” Ancel said, raising his eyebrow suggestively. “They say there’s good hunting in the forest, and beautiful riding trails. The grounds are said to be quite lovely as well. Perhaps you’ll join us?”

Berenger hesitated even as he practically felt Parsins scowling behind him.

“Just for a week or two?” Ancel asked with a pout. “It would be such a shame if our paths never crossed again.”

“Has Rouart authorised you to hand out invitations on his behalf?” Berenger asked.

Ancel laughed. “Formalities,” he said dismissively with a flick of his fingers. “Please. Won’t you consider it?”

Berenger smiled wryly. “I’ll consider it,” he said at last. “Farewell, Ancel.” He nodded politely and made his leave.

When he was alone in the carriage he managed a quiet chuckle. What had he been thinking? Letting some enchanting rent boy wrap him around his finger? It wasn’t just that he was beautiful, it was everything. Even the fact that he belonged to someone else made him all the more enticing. Berenger let himself entertain the fantasy of stealing him away, seducing him, being seduced. He could spirit Ancel away to Varenne and lay him out over dark satin sheets, drape him in jewels-

He let out a deep breath and let the notion go, looking out the window at the dark countryside passing by. It was foolishness. Getting involved in whatever Ancel’s scheme was would be utter foolishness.

It wasn’t until he was back in his study having just finished packing his pipe that he realized Ancel had masterfully outmaneuvered him. He reached into his pocket for his lighter and instead drew out a single emerald earring.

He held it up, watching the way the lamplight played over the jewels. It was nothing to Ancel’s wicked smile, his striking red hair, his hand, warm on Berenger’s arm. The emerald wasn’t nearly as lovely as Ancel’s eyes.

But it was expensive, and now Berenger had no choice but to return it.