#I'm staying at my sisters for a couple days after several bad breakdowns at my family home
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quillandrapier · 2 years ago
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At what age can you act like a dumb teenager and get away with it?
#awful I've been to live with lately#I'm staying at my sisters for a couple days after several bad breakdowns at my family home#And my sister walks in with a card saying I should consider writing something to mum and im just blanking#Because right now I resent her and hate her so much#And i feel like a monster for feeling like that and evil#We are on the same side but she really doesn't understand me#A couple weeks ago I had a full on tantrum after feeling very depressed... I'm 23.#My sister has been awful to me lately#And going home at the moment is so tough that it reduces me to tears and makes me actively suicidal#But my mum hasn't had it easy either because my sister is being a handful to her too#But she kept pointing out how negative and and she is right I am lashing out a lot but#I'm not dealing well with domestic abuse#When my adhd presents itself she acts like the conquenses are the worst thing in the world#She and I cannot communicate at all#She has never really supported me creatively or shown any want to understand me really#She makes me feel stupid and useless and gets defensive when I point that out#She isn't wrong im lazy and useless really#Her and my family make me feel like I have no real good quality and I'm untalented#She treats her two disabled kids like we are creatures#But she is probably right#I've been awful to her lately and I literally got so upset the other day after being attacked again I kicked down and broke a door and#Ran down my dirty street in socks and a t-shirt#She is talking about institutionalising me when I would not be this bad IF I WEREN'T ABUSED DAILY and she knows that#She never comforts me emotionally and I get it its not easy for her either#But im so alone and having the only person I talk to anymore be a person I can't communicate with sucks#And now I'm spiraling again
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mxnae · 11 months ago
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Late Nights, Writers Block, & Apologies
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A/N: this story belongs to mxnae on Tumblr, please do not repost it as your own.
MXNAE'S MASTERLIST
Pairing: jack harlow x fem!reader
Genre: fluff, imagine
summary: you wake up at 2am alone in bed, looking around trying to find where Jack might be she finds their bedroom door cracked with light coming into the room. walking out of your room and wandering around, you find Jack in his studio with a pen and his notebook in front of him along with his face in his hands. he storms out leaving you upset, will he apologize?
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you jolt awake, possibly from a bad dream. when she reaches over to feel for her beloved boyfriend, she feels his side is empty. 'hm' she thinks, wondering where her beloved boyfriend is.
walking to the sliver of light coming from the hallway, leaving the room in only her boyfriend's oversized 'Harlow' sweatshirt and some cheeky underwear, you make your way out of your shared bedroom on the hunt for her boyfriend.
after checking the living room, Jack's mancave, and the kitchen, you make your way to the only other place Jack could be; his studio.
"Baby?" you asked knocking softly on the door already cracked open with light coming from inside. She immediately sees Jack in distress.
"my love, whats the matter?'' she asked going to sit in the second chair beside jack, removing his hands from his once convered face. once his hands are moveed, she can see he's in tears. "oh baby'' she says getting into his lap as he holds her close, breaking down in her arms.
you noticed the trash can that was previously emptied was now full of balled pieces of paper, he was having writer's block.
"i cant do this anymore'' he says with slight anger.
"baby you know you dont have to do it all by yourself, you have urban and your entire team.'' you say attempting to comfort him the best you can as you move back into the nihgbooring chair to look at him face to face.
"what dont you understand y/n, i DONT NEED THEM!" jack yells grabbing his keys and storming out of the room. you stay put, in disbelief that hed ever raise his voice at you knowing what you've been through.
you immediately breakdown, going straight into your shared bedroom and locking yourself inside. engulfing into tears, upset that he'd lash out let alone at you. you never planned on leaving that room, ever again.
later that day...
'girl, you have to get up." Neelam says as shes repeated for the last few hours. its now 2 pm and youve yet to sleep. she used the key jack gave her icase of emergencies.
"but he doesn't love me anymore, why would he do that.." you say breaking down every word, you believed there was no purpose at this point. once Neelam gave up, you just curled up and slowly fell asleep.
Several times during your slumber you received multiple calls from Neelam, urban, and Jack. you declined every single one. yet this time you answered when Urban called.
"what urban" you say lowkey annoyed as you situate yourself on your bed.
"Jack's on his way back. hear him out, give him a chance.'' he says in a pleading voice, hoping to not have his favorite couple including you who is a sister to him, and Jack who is his childhood best friend, break up.
"I guess I can but you know how getting yelled at affects me urb," you say as he agrees. "I got to go, he's here," you say as your home security system alerts you that the garage door has been open, you both say your goodbyes as you hang up.
knock knock. "Baby?" Jack whispers at the door, attempting to open it, yet to find it locked. you get up open the door and immediately engulf him in a hug.
"I was so worried about you'' you say as you pull away from him yet your emotions change almost immediately "I'm still very mad at you tho," you say turning away from him and getting onto your shared bed.
"I know my love and I'm sorry, so very sorry," he says following behind you before grabbing your face so that you look at him.
"You're mine and im yours, im sorry I yelled. I know that can affect you in ways unimaginable." he says shedding a small tear, you quickly wipe it away.
"I accept your apology, but now you owe me a fuck tone of cuddles," you say making grabby hands at him as he quickly takes his shoes off and joins you lying down.
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Traditional Values or Matrimony Before Children
Quick Tag List: @kuruumiya @spacelizardtrashboys @stupidbluegirl @enigmaticandunstable @nattinngrst
This Passage Contains Potentially: swearing, violence, blood, angst, whump, fluff and very smutty content.
Summary: Rod decides it's time to 'pop the question' because he can't risk losing Kirby after they have a massive argument following Kirby getting injured.
Kirby's POV:
"Maybe if ya were able to see things from my point of view, ya wouldn't be here right now!"
"Well, maybe if you weren't so pig-headed about the finish of the match, I wouldn't have ended up getting hurt!"
I had snapped by this point, we were in New Haven, Connecticut and Rod had rushed in at the end of my match against Orton.
The match ended due to outside interference as well as injury.
Piper had knocked me off the turnbuckle, right before I was going to hit a senton bomb on Orton, making me fall out of the ring, off of the turnbuckle and thus slamming my right elbow into the guardrail, leaving me in extreme pain and needing medical attention.
He had managed to make me sprain my elbow, putting it in a sling for three weeks and taking me off television for the next month.
Damien had told me to take the month off, not risking any sort of further injury.
From the sixth of May until the sixth of June I wouldn't be allowed to work and I pinned all of the blame onto Roddy.
I got Damien to drive the long way back to the house, luckily me and Roderick had separate keys.
I was so hot with rage that I decided to just go home, to Cardiff, forget all about America and Roddy.
I stewed in the anger for the full three weeks of healing, on the Twenty-ninth of May, I heard the front door open, fully ready to call everything quits I waited for him to get through the foyer and see me.
"Before ya leave me, let me know, did ya love me?"
"I, uh, I, God, Roddy," I couldn't hold back the tears and Rod came running up to me, I tried to push him away with my left arm but failed.
"My love, my love, shh, shh, it's okay, you're okay."
"Rod, I wanted to leave but then I got my citizenship finished up and everything was clear and I couldn't think of a life without you in it … And now is not the time to get horny."
"Oh God, I'm not, that isn't, I wanted to do this after I cheered you up, but I guess now is as good a time as any, uhm," he took a moment to collect himself and got in front of me next to the table and got down on one knee, "Kirby Trevor, I know I'm a mad Scottish bastard at times, and before you ask I did ask your parents for your hand," he got out a small black box from the pouch of his sporran and opened it, inside laying half set into the foam was a simple, slim, iron ring, "I know we're moving a little fast, but I can't imagine a life without you in it and, I'm not risking losing you for a third time, I would like to marry ya, if you would let me."
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"Roderick, you're kidding."
"I'm not kidding, mo chridhe. It would make me the happiest man alive."
"Oh … my … God … Yes, Rod, Yes!"
He slipped the ring onto my left ring finger, pulling me closer and kissed my neck before hoisting me over his shoulder and taking me upstairs.
By the time I woke up the following day, Rod was putting an ice pack on my elbow.
"Roddy?"
"Morning, mo chridhe, are ya alright?"
"I'm fine, yesterday was real, right?"
Rod lent down to kiss me, running his fingers over the rings on my left hand, making me realise that instead of my usual three, there were now, in fact, four rings, all in a row. Yesterday was real, the almost argument, the breakdown, the proposal, it was all real.
Without much thought I got up and backed Rod against the wall, kissing his neck, his jawline, his lips, anywhere I could access, until he managed to back me towards the bed and throw me down onto it.
"I fucking love ya, mo chridhe."
"Rod, when are we getting married."
"When do you want us to get married?"
"As soon as possible. If it's possible"
Roddy made calls, several calls, to I don't know who but he managed to get us a civil ceremony on Friday the first of June.
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Seeing Rod in the pale blue suit as I stood there in my satin, peach toned slip dress I suddenly felt complete, in a weird way, like I had found my other half. I guess that's why people call their spouse their 'better half'.
The matching wedding bands we had Rod had bought without me felt right, two Celtic wedding bands, one gold (being Roddy's) and one silver (being mine).
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We got back to the house, now a married couple and likely to spend a lot more time near each other, seeing as Damien had outed me on television the day before our civil ceremony as Rod's girlfriend, and soon-to-be wife.
Captain Lou and Cyndi Lauper had both made statements on me and Rod being 'man and wife' with both of them believing that it was 'disgusting to see two freaks marrying each other'.
However, the other D.O.D members as well as Schultz, Orndorff, and Orton showing support.
Roddy took 'wedding night bliss' seriously. No condoms, no alcohol, just him and me and a potentially breakable bed.
Things started off the moment we got in through the front door, Rod quickly locking the door behind us as I took my heels off, now in just my satin dress, I started walking out of the foyer, Rod pulled me back, hoisting me into a bridal carry and taking me upstairs, kicking open our bedroom door before letting me down.
I managed to sit myself on the edge of the bed while Rod was preoccupied with taking off his suit, I focused back on taking off my dress, the zip up the back actually pretty easy to unzip and remove, standing back up and letting the dress slide off, hearing a groan from Rod and knowing fully that he was watching me, he soon saw the black lace leg garter and started grinning like a mad man.
"Rod, what are you thinking about?"
"I think you know, honey."
In a matter of about a minute or two, Rod had ripped off the garter with his teeth and started kissing from my mid-thigh up to my groin and then making his way up to kissing my neck and then my mouth.
Feeling the heat from Rod's groin as well as his erect member poking at my clit through two layers of clothing (his briefs and my boxers) and hearing him groan in my ear, I started sliding my hand down the front of Rod's briefs.
when we woke up the next morning, both still fully nude, Rod was just starting to wake up as I started to get dressed.
"Oh, there you are, my beautiful wife."
"My dearest husband."
"We've gotta get back to work, Honey."
"I know, Roddy, I know."
By the seventh of June we were back at work fully, each night before Rod had asked for my permission to try and get me pregnant and I agreed, most of the time it was either in a hotel bed or on the front bench of the D200.
On screen I was usually by Roddy's side often being treated as softer or more emotionally vulnerable when compared to him, but just as quick-witted and tough as him. A marriage of equals instead of your typical opposites attract.
On the ninth of June I was in Roddy's corner during his fight against Rocky Johnson at the Capital centre in Landover, Maryland. He pinned Johnson, later on that same night he filmed a Piper's Pit segment with Captain Lou.
I was once again in Roddy's corner for another win against Rocky Johnson on the fifteenth in Detroit.
Then again, another Roddy win against Johnson on the sixteenth in Hollywood, Florida's Sportatorium before he filmed another segment of the Pit with Lauper.
I had noticed that either my period was late this month or something was wrong because I still had some cramping pains but they weren't as bad as they usually would be if I was 'on'. I decided to drop my worries for now and to focus on staying by Rod's side as I knew if anything bad happened to me, he'd be the first to react.
We went to the CYC in Scranton, Pennsylvania for another one of Roddy's matches against Rocky Johnson on the 18th.
I noticed on the twentieth that I had started feeling tired much easier than before, often needing to sit down a lot quicker than I was used to.
Backstage at the Civic Centre in Erie, Pennsylvania on the Twenty-first. Instead of going out with Roddy like what had been planned, Billie and Vickie had pulled me aside and into a bathroom, locking all three of us in a small private bathroom stall originally meant for disabled patrons or staff members, Vickie started questioning me.
"How long have you and him been married?"
"Around twenty days, why?"
"Have you two been, y'know," Billie wiggled her eyebrows, "Active?"
"Ya mean sexually, of course. I'm his wife, what are you two doing?"
"Well, little 'sister' time to take a test."
"What, Vic, like a newlywed game or something?"
Billie pushed me backwards, forcing me to sit on seat of the toilet, still with my slacks on.
"This test," Vic pulled out an 'ADVANCE' box from her purse, "You look confused, Kirbs. It's a pregnancy test, tall-ass."
"No, no, I can't be, just, no."
"Take it, we'll guard the door."
Vic unlocked the door and they exited, leaving me to take the pregnancy test, I did what the test required and told Vic, who went through the steps, and started giggling to herself after the result came through.
"I'm going to be an auntie."
"Oh no, no, you're kidding, right?"
Vic wasn't kidding, she explained the test and the result and lo and behold my future had changed, I was expecting a child. Rod didn't know yet, but I didn't know how to tell him. Truly I love Rod, but how was I gonna explain this to him.
The following day (22nd June 1984) it was announced that 'Due to unforeseen circumstances' I was not wrestling for the next ten months.
On that Saturday (23rd June 1984) Rod had brought me on to Piper's Pit to address some questions about my nearly a year long departure from wrestling.
"I've had a lot of questions about why my wife is off your screens, ladies and germs, so here she is, my beautiful wife, Kirby Piper."
"Hi Roddy."
"Hello, beautiful. First of all, congratulations on marrying the strongest and most intelligent man in the WWF. Secondly, why have you decided to take a ten month break from active competition?"
"Firstly, thank you for marrying a female giant. Secondly, Rod, look me in the eyes."
He did as I asked, and so I continued.
"I am being completely serious, okay."
"Okay."
"Roddy Piper, I, as your wife, and as your friend, must be completely honest and tell you that I am," I took a moment to compose myself and realised that both the audience, as well as both Orton and Piper were hanging on my every word, "I'm, I am," I took a deep breath in to help calm myself down, "I am pregnant."
Barely above a whisper, I had said it just loud enough for the microphone Piper had customarily shoved in my face, the same way he did to all his guests, could pick up.
"Re, uh, repeat that, Kirby," Rod stumbled over his words momentarily, "If you, if ya wouldn't mind, my, my love."
Slightly louder than before, now at my normal speaking volume, rather than a whisper, I repeated my statement, "The reason I'm out of the ring for the next ten months is because I, the human being you see here, I am with child. I am pregnant."
Rod erupted, dropping the mic, which still continued to work and actually caught him yelling, "I'm gonna be a dad?! I'm going to be a father?!"
He dropped to his knees in front of me, I leant down to kiss him and he got up, having to lean down into the kiss for a moment. The crowd cheered from behind him, before they started chanting his name. He helped me out of my seat and Orton gave Rod the mic before helping me stand from the other side.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, my wife, Kirby Piper, and the reason, oh my God, the reason she is out of active competition. I'm gonna be a father! Acey baby, I'm gonna be a dad, can ya believe it?!"
Rod leant up to kiss me, letting Orton let go of the other side of my back as Rod wrapped his arms around my waist and stayed in the moment until we both needed air, touching his forehead to mine as he huffed out an almost silent 'I love you, so much'.
END OF TRADITIONAL VALUES or MATRIMONY BEFORE CHILDREN
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