#I'm so sorry this is kinda choppy lmao | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

masonscig · 2 years ago

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heyy, explaining what i said about the N romance, sorry in advance for the long rant:

i played for the first time w my usual detective in a relationship with nate and thought the pacing and timing of everything was pretty weird. i think the 2 main things people were excited for were the love confession and the first intimate scene, and both of them felt very off to me. like, the detective can say they're in love with them very early, during the combat/ressearch scene, and they don't say it back LMAO... and to me that wouldn't necessarily be an issue if the reasons they couldn't say it were explored, but they're not and there's an option to go down on them/have them go down on you immediately after 😀 like right there on the grass! so obviously that's pretty odd and ooc in itself but there's ALSO the date scene in which they bang the detective on the pool table and leave right after bc they got a call from A to join them on patrol?!?!??

they do end up confessing their feelings in the end and it's cute or whatever but everything just feels kinda weightless. N was always constructed as a very intense and romantic character so idk what happened. i think this whole book suffered bc of the insane amount of branching and it's very evident in this romance, the scenes feel really choppy.

i ended up replaying it without being in a relationship and it was sooo much smoother, only having the option to confess in the end after they do makes a lot more sense and those s3x scenes should just have been saved for other books, period. i did really like the other routes, especially A's, but to me this one was a miss. at least the mc can opt out of everything and wait for the next book lmao

HIIII IM GLAD YOU SENT ME THIS <3 sorry i didn't get to it yesterday! and don't apologize for it being long i loved reading it !!!

god i knew that mc could say "i love you" and n could not say it back – and about the pool scene – and the later confession from n – but like. i didn't have a clear picture of the route itself, and it's coming together and ... not looking so good imo LMAO

what's crazy to me, is that mis/hka created SUCH a good opportunity for conflict in the n route, what with mc saying i love you and n not saying it back – as soon as i heard from a friend you could do that, i was FLOORED and i was so sure that n's route was going to be a favorite. and yet, she completely flubbed it by not giving consequences to decisions. i wonder why she gives players the options to do things that should cause conflict if she won't follow through with it?

part of me thinks it's because of the insane branching, like you said, but also i think that as much as she might try to write varying paths for the n romance, it doesn't turn out that way because she favors a certain type of mc and that's evident in every route i think? like of course there's no way to account for every mc out there – it's not on her if our specific oc doesn't quite fit in the story – however, if you're advertising certain aspects of n's romance like their secretiveness, their intenseness, their guilt, their struggle with humanity, etc etc, and how that would alter a romantic route, then you can't expect every player choosing him for that to just. be okay with random i love you confessions and mid sex scenes that are completely out of place both with the plot of b3 and the timeline of mc's relationship with n?

sorry i'm jumping all around the place (im so bad about that with answering asks LMAO) – but you picked the exact right phrasing: it's weightless. it just doesn't feel like the n romance we were promised from book 1, book 2, the asks, patreon, etc. i don't know what went wrong :/

and dude YES, i was so convinced that mis/hka was going to have each ro's first sex scene be in a different book to add more flavor to each route – and i figured this was going to be f's chance to shine LMAO and that she'd save n's scene for the next book! i thought so much of this book was going to be romantic without sex, but... god was i wrong. i honestly would've preferred zero sex on any of the routes because it just doesn't fit (i could've even justified n engaging in sex with the mc to like. distract them from saying "i love you")

sorry for the essay from me KMDFMKDFKM you've given me so much to think about !! ty again for the ask !!! <333

#yeah i've been talking to friends for days about what we're not happy with #and my n main friend has picked up on more and more stuff they don't like with each playthrough #normally i don't care if mis/hka misses in certain ways like making the characters say very ooc stuff #but when the *majority* of the route feels off? oof #asks #twc book 3 #twc book 3 spoilers #twc spoilers #n*fw #long post

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6okuto · 2 years ago

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Hihi jfjdjf just wanted to show u my TS charas i made with a picrew, they're not really OCs they're more like self inserts tbh fjbsbfbsbf.

The first two are my main ones, with the Oracle backstory, they're the same person. The long haired one before and short hair after she runs away from that cult, the clothes are still somewhat baggy bc she got used to wear only flowy skirts so fabric that lets her move freely is important in her clothes. After she ran away, to keep the cult ppl from finding her she Rapunzel'd herself and now styles a v short choppy wolfcut of some sorts (based on a tru story lmao) the lil coat, shoes and huge bag are the only stuff she kept when she ran away, everything else was stolen by her on the way to the caravan. The moon hairpin on her head is more of a personal touch of mine jxbdndb i also headcanon that shE DID WORE GLOVES but she lost them after a quick wash (very me) so only the bandages are left xjndjf. (I like that she steals idk jfbdbf)

The third one is for the Alchemist backstory, a huge flora and fauna enthusiast and has a diary, also her sight gave up from reading in the dark hence the glasses (so me frfr) her belt is my favorite thing bc running away was a v spontaneous decision so she kinda only took what she was already wearing jfnsbfbs. Eventually on the caravan someone lend her a bag for her diary so it's all good jfndbf (also i forgot her bandages lmao:') pretend they're there)

SO YE i have no one to talk about this so I'm so sorry for dumping all this on this v tiny ask, when I find the picrew again I'll link you to it uwu.

STOPPPP THEYRE SO CUTESIE I LOVE THEM OMG. F for the hair and gloves. stay strong.. she looks vry good w both long and short hair‼️ i love the outfits saur much i wish them luck w their curse and romance... who r they going 2 romance btw.

also this picrew is soo doll dress up its awesome. i found it a while ago but it was bugging out so i couldnt do it ☹️☹️ IM GLAD TO SEE U GOT TO MAKE THESE THEY R AWESOME!

#🧾nia.answers #<3 sel #q

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cedarbranch · 7 days ago

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okay so: Playing With Matches, Sweet Tooth, Truth or Dare (my beloved), Convicted Criminals of Thought (my beloved!), Moth To Light? sorry i'm pretty much obsessed w all of your fics. humiliating . send ask

omg this is extremely flattering... i have stans... stroke my ego some more why don't you anon /j

this is going under a cut, i'm about to YAP

sweet tooth: i wrote this one for a holiday exchange in the gm server i was part of at the time! (cat, if you're out there, i think about your story about being mistaken for a lush corporate tester every damn time i walk into that store). i used to really dislike writing for prompts so it was a mark of how much i loved that little community (and how much it energized me) that i worked up the nerve to write something like this, lol. i had also never written a coffee shop au before. michael's dislike of coffee and subsequent anxiety over what to order was 100% a projection from me, LMAO, i was like how can i write a coffee shop au when i hate coffee and have no idea how coffee shops work?? (oh, i can make that the whole premise!) i had to watch a few youtube tutorials on how to do latte art so i could make sure i was describing it well. oh, and the hot chocolate gerry gives michael is my personal spice blend that i love to use in hot cocoa! protip: hot milk, melt a heap of chocolate chips directly into it (with a sweetness level of your choice) then top with cinnamon, nutmeg, and just a little bit of allspice. god tier.

also, i'm writing this while drinking a latte, so needless to say I've Changed.

truth or dare: okay this is hilarious to look back on because i... CANNOT remember for the life of me what possessed me to write it. i think this was something i started spitballing in the gm server and then everyone went "CEDAR IF YOU DON'T WRITE THIS I'LL AAHDHSFHDFHSGJK" so, i got enabled, basically. i'm pretty sure this was also written when the trans gerard keay AO3 tag wasn't an official archive tag yet and i was trying to brute-force it into existence... there were a couple tags i did this for (see also: it/its pronouns for michael the distortion, monsterfucker gerard keay). i was kinda making it my mission to churn out enough fic under these tags that they got recognized by the tag wranglers, lol, especially trans gerry. because i started writing gm SO early i was like "i have the opportunity to shape the fanon dynamic here and i am making SURE everyone sees gerry as trans, dammit!" this fic was also a milestone for me because i think it might've been the first pure pwp i ever wrote :) still not something i do very often because i am so frequently led astray by Plot, but it's nice to have in my skill set!

moth to light: MY BELOVED!! excluding current wips, this is the fic i am most proud of. it definitely marked a shift in my writing where i was starting to introduce relationships that felt less fanfic-y/easily romantic, and more akin to the dynamics that compelled me so much in the various source materials i interacted with. i've already discussed the main points of what i was doing with this story in various ask/ao3 comment responses, but the core of it was about monstrosity and self-acceptance, how gerry could fall in love with a monster, and the uneasy space where trust and fear coexist. there are definitely some things i'd change about it if i could - i think certain bits are a bit choppy and rushed, scene transitions were not a fully developed skill for me - but overall i think the dynamic between gerry and michael is what makes it hold up so well. and i also can't help but look back at it fondly because that kind of dynamic is SO characteristic of my writing now, and i consider this fic to be the first time it really emerged.

i also think it has some neat prose and exchanges of dialogue... at this point i'd already written several fics that captured the mind-breaking physicality of the spiral, and it was a challenge to keep finding new ways to express that in words without it becoming repetitive - but a very fun and stimulating challenge! i laugh because this, too, is something that's become characteristic of me. turns out i just really enjoy trying to capture fantastical, overwhelming mental-physical sensations on the page. i think physicality is a big part of my narrative voice and i also enjoy writing in extremes, so it makes a lot of sense why i like it so much!

there were a few points that everything else in this fic grew around. the entire exchange leading up to "i could change your mind, i think" was one of them. see also, "it's not the spiral i belong to, it's you." "that doesn't make you a monster" / "doesn't it, though." michael and gerry being protective of one another. gerry lost in the hallways - it was very important to me that michael actually come close to killing him at least once, and that the reader felt that danger. it was something that i felt was missing from gm fic at the time (and there was barely any fic to begin with - moth to light was the second ever gm fic on ao3 that broke 20k. i'm not sure how long you've been around, anon, but MAN those first couple years of being a gm shipper were wild).

i also had a ton of fun setting up gerry's complicated pull toward michael!! it's romantic, but there's so much psychology beyond that. like, when he first finds out who michael used to be: "There are a hundred new questions bouncing around Gerry’s brain—what did Michael think of Gertrude, before she betrayed him? Why hasn’t he tried to take revenge on her now? Does he remember his descent into the Spiral? Did he know what was coming? Did it hurt to lose himself?" it's his own future he's scared about, and if he'll end up just like michael. i hope that came across.

ah... so fond of this one. i crack myself the hell up with how obvious it should've been that i'd wind up writing hannibal fic. a character who drives every conversation by responding with some indirect, metaphorical bullshit and a distinctive speech pattern? a character whose descent into monstrosity is well underway but he can't stop agonizing over whether he can tolerate that part of himself, much less embrace it - but his love interest's presence allows him to? a relationship dynamic where it's constantly uncertain whether one's intentions are lethal, and the answer always feels like "obviously yes" but also "obviously no"?? they're literally hannigram. hannigram is the fucking BLUEPRINT of this dynamic, i just didn't know it yet. i actually caught myself in one of my current wips a while back accidentally fucking recreating the michael-at-gerry's-throat "please don't" scene damn near word for word, and i thought to myself, HOLD ON,THIS VIBE FEELS A LITTLE FAMILIAR...

so yeah, uh, if you like the vibe of this fic, maybe watch hannibal?

convicted criminals of thought: i felt fucking insane when i was writing this one fr. it took me like 4 days, i think?? NEVER have i banged out 19k so fast.

the fic was mossstly just born from me loving the concept of beholding avatar powers used for smut and really, really wanting to write that with gerry, LOL. i didn't expect it to be so long and plotty, but the dynamic i wanted ended up requiring more setup than i originally thought it would... i was really trying to push the sexual tension and i was also taking a step into writing much more explicit kink than i had in the past. like moth to light, i would say this fic represented a turning point for me, because these days explicit d/s makes up most of what i write haha. turns out i'm just super into exploring power dynamics in fiction and using sex as a vehicle for said exploration. there are some things i'd write differently if i did it now... i wrote criminals during the era in which ~safe and communicative sex in fanfic~ was really being pushed online, so i made sure to include detailed discussions of boundaries. the fact that i wrote in the stoplight system makes me cringe a little now, but the saving grace that allows me to not care too much is that i do think it's in character for that version of gerry and michael. it's a very reasonable choice for a young man who's naive when it comes to both the supernatural and the sexual, and a more experienced dom with a protective streak. (these days, i'm firmly in the camp that no matter how insane the sex is, characters should not be negotiating their kinks onscreen unless it is in-character for them to both a) have the knowledge of kink required for such discussions in the first place, and b) initiate those discussions. obviously in REAL life these things should always be prioritized! but if i see a fanfic scene interrupted for two characters who are normally wildly emotionally stunted and non-communicative to go "wait, what's your safeword!!" it'll completely take me out of it... i also think this is just one aspect of a much broader issue with people being unwilling to make their characters (even morally gray/straight-up cruel characters) take actions that they view as unacceptable. i certainly struggled with this for a long time (more on that later) but thankfully i've gotten over it.

an unrelated detail for this one - the flesh monster gerry and michael encounter was inspired by the mindflayer in season 3 of stranger things :)

anddddd... yeah, there was supposed to be a sequel... technically there is, it's just that only ~75% of it exists. it features: workplace sex and edging, michael being a brat, collaring, new beholding abilities, and a new appreciation for degradation. i say this purely to be evil, because it's unlikely it'll ever get finished (oops). onto the pile of incomplete wips it goes, along with all the stranger things fics... i promise this pains me as much as it does you.

playing with matches: oh my darling magnolia verse, always on my mind. fun fact, the original title of this fic was "a journal of the plague year," one of the leitners referenced in tma. naturally, Certain Events Happened while i was writing the fic, and that title took on... new, unintended connotations!!! so i changed it (though i did keep referring to it as 'plague year' in my head for quite a while). i'm actually happy i changed it, though. obvious blase is such a great song for this gerry, and (if i ever FUCKING finish it!!) the agnes fic is titled after the very next lyric in the song, which is perfect for her + the fact that it tells much of the same story from her pov.

where to even start with this fic... there's so much going on. one of my lasting impressions was that it was a DEVIL to get gerry's characterization right... this is where i mention how i used to be really, really bad at letting my characters be bad people, haha. gerry thinks of himself as sooo prickly and mean in this fic but he really... isn't? very much at all? lmao. i literally had to go back in after the first draft and make him meaner and i STILL don't think i did enough. he was meant to be a lot sharper than he actually turned out to be. (Yet Another reason i hope i can return to the agnes fic eventually - we'll get to see more of a different side of gerry. honestly, with the way things unfolded, a lot of him being an asshole became just because he's stupid and inconsiderate rather than because he's mean. and i think that works, ultimately).

some scenes that came to me early and made me decide this fic needed to exist: gerry and agnes smoking on the roof, talking around jude. gerry laying in the road at night and stargazing. agnes burning woodchips. shaving agnes's head. the exchange between agnes and gerry leading up to "i'm tired of being angry" (this might have been the source of it all, though i can't quite remember now). breaking into chapman hall (this is something that my friend group actually did around the time i was writing the fic - i wasn't there, but i was so delighted by the photos that it ended up in the fic).

overall, a LOT of this fic was relishing in writing the first-year college experience after i had just gone through it. (well, more like 60% of it). i was writing it in my freshman year - spring 2020. the fall 2019 semester was honestly a highlight of my life that i'll always be nostalgic for... i found a family near-instantly and felt true joy and acceptance for possibly the first time, and then it was snatched away from me in the spring with covid evacuation. writing it out allowed me to kind of re-live it through the characters. magnolia university is a BLATANT copy of my own uni - to the point where multiple people from my school ended up reading the fic and commenting that they recognized it. zeeeero subtlety from me, lol. a lot of the physical settings and details are thinly-veiled adaptations from real life. the queer frat our gang attends parties at is, in fact, the one i was part of (with its name changed) - it may be a stretch characterization-wise, but it was too big a part of my college experience to leave out. (and yeah, the buzzcut queer who welcomes gerry in the first time he visits was a self-insert. just couldn't resist).

ex altiora, too, is heavily based on my own experience being in a band with my friends during college. i've been pretty upfront about that, haha. when they reference a song which is about "murder as a metaphor for internalized homophobia," that's a real song, it just has a different title and hasn't been released yet. should i have linked my irl music in my fic notes? mmm, maybe not, but i do like the idea that someone out there could enjoy my music after discovering it through my fic. if only we had more than 2 songs on spotify... the EP is about three years late now, but it SHOULD be out very early next year :')

anyway. as you may have guessed based on the scenes i highlighted earlier, agnes and gerry's relationship is reeeaally important to this fic (and the 'verse as a whole)... which is why i feel so damn bad that i've left what was really supposed to be a duology as just one fic!! the incomplete/unpublished agnes fic fills in so many gaps, it drives me crazy. i keep getting dragged into other hyperfixations and i really don't control what my ADHD lets me work on, but there is so, SO much more of this 'verse that hasn't seen the light of day. nearly every character has a ton of unpublished lore. melanie and georgie almost got their own fic. tim and sasha almost got their own fic. don't get me started on oliver - i get so mad at the gang when i think about him, he's got SO much going on that nobody ever notices just because he puts on a good front of being well put-together. obsessive perfectionism, borderline substance abuse, and situationship drama... (when he takes care of mike crew tripping balls at that one party? yeah, that's the start of something much bigger). julia and her relationship with her dad. the conflicts between julia and gerry because they're so upfront with the way they fight, but end up missing all the important underlying issues in the process. agnes. agnes. AGNES. HER INSANE RELIGIOUS TRAUMA. the undiagnosed autism and legitimate compulsive pyromania. her gender expression issues, her fucked relationship with jude... 15k of it in my google docs and that's not close to half the story.

i'm getting distracted as always being vague about what's not out there, so let me clarify some of what is. first and foremost, agnes's lighter is her coping mechanism. the first time gerry meets her, she's forced herself to go to a party because her parents demand her to be social, and gotten so drunk she threw up. humiliating. time to start a fire. when she goes to the first punk show with gerry and he tells her she looks like a catholic schoolgirl, it makes her want to scream. Unresolved Issues There. at that show, jude is rude to agnes, agnes nearly fights her in the pit, and jude is immediately enamored with her. the toxic yuri begins. their first hookup happens after the chapman hall break-in. jude is the one who shows her the rooftop spot where she later smokes witth gerry. she has very little sense of identity and jude gives her that, in the most destructive way possible. eventually, shaving her head is a desperate attempt to do something for herself instead of jude (she knows jude will hate it), but afterwards, she doesn't actually like it, and it feels like just another way that jude has driven everything in her life. jude cannot take responsibility for a damn thing, and she blames agnes's growing distance on the band, hence their later fight at band practice. after that, when julia follows agnes, agnes has her first real vulnerable conversation about it - which she's been trying to do with gerry for a while, but gerry's fucking awful at talking about feelings and has barely even picked up on it. this is what pisses julia off so bad, she feels like he's been a bad friend to agnes. agnes and julia get very close after this, especially over the summer. (agnes isn't mad at gerry at all, to be clear - julia is mostly projecting because she also wants more intimacy in her relationship with gerry, but he never gives it to her. around michael, he's warm and open and communicative... but he doesn't show the same growth with his friendships. rip julia).

ugh, they're all so REAL to me. thanks for giving me the excuse to rant, i always love to <3 feel free to ask me whatever you want or message me directly, i'm an open book!

#also really nice to get positive feedback about my tma fics even though i'm not writing them anymore #it's like a reminder that. hey! even though you're writing hannibal now that doesn't mean your older work Ceases To Exist!!#helpful bc it does feel that way sometimes :')) thank you again #answered #sweethearts #magnolia

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practically-an-x-man · 1 year ago

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Ooh, angel, maleficent and museum for the wip list asks!

Ahhh so sorry I didn't get to this earlier! I honestly wasn't expecting any asks for the wip ask thing, I'm currently on a band trip so I'm typing this from my phone in a hotel lmao

"Angel" is the nickname for my fic A Love Once New. I'd link it, but I have no idea how to do that from a mobile browser like this, so just go to my pinned post and you'll see it. It was one of my first X-Men fics, started about two years ago, and now it's over 200k words. I have a feeling it's because it stars my all-time favorite character: Mr. Warren Worthington III of Archangel fame, of course. I will admit, some of the writing towards the beginning is maybe a little choppy, since it's older, but it improves drastically as you move along.

"Maleficent" is the nickname for a fic idea I have for a story set after the events of Maleficent: Mistress of Evil. Maleficent isn't actually the main character: Borra is, alongside an OC I created named Sable. I started writing the first few chapters a while ago, deleted that, rewrote a bit of the first chapter, and haven't touched it since. I still plan to write it, though! It'll jump back between the present and Borra's childhood, and I'm eager to write Sable's side of the story... It's pretty unique, I think. But since it's a smaller fandom and a WAY underappreciated character, I've kinda been holding off on really writing it. I think my next one is going to be a Bullet Train fic (based on the poll I did a week or so ago), since people seemed to pull towards that one a little more and I crave feedback lol

"Museum" is the nickname for another currently-running fic of mine, Who Waits Forever Anyway? Same thing as before, typing this on my phone so just go to my pinned post if you want the link. It's set shortly before Night at the Museum 3, and travels through the movie before eventually moving into a bit of my own plot. And maybe a sequel... but we'll get to that. It's mainly centered on Ahkmenrah and my OC Katherine, but I've introduced a TON of Egyptian history and mythology that wasn't present in the original movies. I... have gone a little feral with this one. Or really I go feral with all of them, I tend to get really invested in what I write

(and friend can I let you in on a little secret? These may not be your fandoms but I have ideas for Loki, Bucky Barnes, and the Moon Knight boys too, they're just hidden in my writing masterlist right now. If you'd like to ask about any of them, since I know you write for them too, I'd be happy to talk to you about those too! I actually have a ton of ideas that I haven't put in separate documents yet)

#my friends!!!#answered asks #fanfic #my writing #fanfic author #my ocs #ask game

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misakarose · 2 years ago

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Hello! Do you have any tips on making gifs for people who are starting out for the first time? I’m really interested in making gifs, but I don’t know where to start ^^;

OMG HELLO!!! I'm sooooooo sorry this response is coming to you late, I'm so bad at managing my inbox it's not even funny... >.<

tbh I kinda suck at giving tips and suggestions lmao it's really not my strong suit. the best advice I can give is just to have fun with it! don't be afraid to just click on things in Photoshop and experiment. most of my colorings come from doing just that. mixing PSDs too, just play around and see what works for you!

that goes for frame deletion and timing too - for a long time, I was under the impression that I needed to delete every identical frame and set the frame delay at 0.1, no matter what the timing of the scene was. I did this for a really long time until I realized that some frames have identicals for a reason and setting the delay to 0.07 or 0.04 could really help with making the gif less choppy and much more smooth. so again, just playing around with things until you find what's right for you is really the biggest thing.

everyone's gonna have different techniques and ways they go about doing things so it's hard to really give concrete tips. there are tons of really helpful tutorials and stuff like that around that will do a much better job than I ever could haha

I hope even a little bit of this made sense jhdglaf;kdh

#anon #ask #I really suck at this kinda stuff you guys a;worhgaerg

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ladycauthon · 3 years ago

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Okay okay, so that episode was an experience:

The Perrin/Egwene/Rand stuff is stupid and I hate it

Lan and Nynaeve? Hell yeah baby let's go!! Love that. Also loved Lan still being close to one of the men who got him out of Malkier and raised him - great stuff 10/10

Min's great, the visions are great, but what's that baby Rand was holding about?

Plenty of Mat convos which was nice to see them react properly, but sorry Egwene you wouldn't die for Mat what a lie lmao

Blood snow!! Loved that, although wish Shaiel had remained veiled during the fighting 😡😡 But loved Tam and also the Illianer bees on the armour made me very happy

The reveal of the Dragon was kinda meh? It felt very choppy. I wish the scene of Rand carrying Tam had been a little longer, and that Rand had maybe been struggling a little more with Tam's confession throughout the season, like in the book? Seemed a bit forced to me, but maybe it'll land better on a rewatch when I'm not so tired

Did Loial just disappear when they got through the Ways??

Fain bby!!!

Also Moiraine has set the Red Ajah on Mat?? Sorry what? What? What?

#wheel of time #wot #wot show #wot show spoilers #wot spoilers #wot book spoilers #wot liveblog

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matches-is-meow · 2 years ago

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🐰 || hiya! i saw that you were doing bnha matchups and i wanted to jump at that opportunity so bad! and dw at all if its your first time doing them, i'm sure they'll turn out great! /gen :]

🌸 || im unlabeled but im attracted to pretty much whoever. but for this matchup i think i'd like a guy lolz! preferably from 1-A and no one out of high school becuz i see the pro heroes as more parental figures ( °`u´° )👍

🐰 || my myers briggs personality is right on the cusp of enfp and infp which is a little funky but i prefer infp i think! my enneagram is 2w3 too. im also a hufflepuff and my zodiac is leo!

🌸 || my personality is usually very happy, i'm a huge optimist and just kind of "puppy-like" so i've been told! i can be pretty funny and enjoy making my friends laugh! i'm a bit quiet at first, but if i think you're cool then i can open up very quickly. i've been called ditzy so many times its almost annoying. i'm probably always the last person to fall asleep at a sleepover because of how hyperactive i get at night! im called weird often because i get so hyperfixated on certain things and i know a shit ton of odd (or grisly) facts. i like a lot of weird media and figure out a way to tell people about them constantly. wanna hear about that truman show documentary i watched?? how about my herobrine experiences back in 4th and 5th grade?? maybe even a few facts about lemon sharks? i will be very excited if anyone listens to me ramble about random shit i saw on the internet. people are always like "why do you know this shit" and i shrug and pretend i didn't stay up all night studying the youtube algorithm just because i felt like it at the time.

🐰 || my looks differ from my personality quite a bit actually. i have a medium body type that's not really too chubby or too skinny, just in the middle? its doesn't bother me a whole lot but it used to. i'm short. like extremely short. around 4'9 - 4'10 because i havent grown since 6th grade haha. ive been to many doctors trying to see what my deal is LMAO. but back on my appearance, i have a wolfcut thats kinda messy and more of a shag at the moment because it hasnt been cut in a while, my bangs are dyed pink and blue and theyre kinda choppy across my forehead. my hair is shoulder length atm. i have peachy-pale skin because i can't tan and i have light but noticeable freckles on the bridge of my nose and a prominent freckle on my bottom left eyelid :D! i have gray blue eyes and a septum piercing. i dont like to wear a bunch of makeup because of the way it feels (i wish i didn't have sensory issues) so i stick with some eyeliner and mascara :]

🌸 || i mostly wear ripped mom jeans and lavender converse, along with whatever horror movie shirt i found in my closet. pretty much my entire wardrobe is based upon horror movies because thats all my shirts are! there's a few junji ito shirts that ive had for a while but i love them so much. hopefully guttergarbs won't sell out of the black christmas tshirts before i can snag a few 😫

🐰 || i love minecraft so much and its currently one of my biggest hyperfixations!!! ARGS are up there too, along with youtube and creepypasta! i have (not yet diagnosed) autism that i'm trying to get a diagnosis for and adhd so its kind of hard living a normal life? or what is normal by standard. i have moments where i go nonverbal and sometimes i can only focus on what new youtube videos are out today. i have a very hard time staying focused and my friends often have to tell me to do so. i have a favorite youtuber that gives me a lot of comfort and i watch his videos to ground me. my immediate response to bad stuff is youtube. its kind of childish, but it's just me.

🌸 || anyways, tysm for having these open and giving me the chance to send one in!!! i really just infodumped there lol sorry if i got carried away i was very excited! hope you're having a wonderful day/night and take good care of yourself!!!

- bo! 🐰🐰

Shawty. Honey. Sweetheart. Sugar. Flour. Milk, eggs, 2 teaspoons of salt- Thank you so much for this ask!!! You are the first person to throw themselves out into the shark infested water and I really want to thank you from the bottom of my heart! I honestly expected no body to respond... so this was an awesome surprise. Hope you enjoy your matchup!! YOUR MATCHUP IS...

Denki Kaminari!!!!! *Insert cheering noises*

Kaminari was kinda just playin when he started flirting with you and stuff, BUT MAN. Catching feels???? Not expected in the slightest.

At first it had been more of a challenge thing for him; flirt with the cute quiet chick, but after talking with you for a while you opened up and he realized how many interesting things you had to say.

Y'all became texting at 1 am friends pretty soon, with him sharing memes and you sharing YouTube recs (he thinks you have really good taste) And bonding over what an awesome director Stanley Kubrick is but what an awful dude he is irl, and that creepypasta you read last night that you JUST HAVE TO SHARE BC DENKI WE ARE KEEPING THE NEXT STEPHEN KINGS IN THIS FANDOM I SWEAR-

When y'all start dating, he is just, so understanding of any times you go nonverbal or when you just aren't feeling up to life at the moment. He gets it. He will ask at the beginning of the relationship so he will know what to do if you're nonverbal at the moment and will follow your request through to a tee.

Sorry. So sorry, bc Kaminari has 14 different short jokes saved at any given moment, for any given situation. Totally gives head pats. oh yes get ready to be patted and to be the elbow rest.

HORRID HABIT of kissing your freckle. He thinks its adorable. (Thinks you're adorable-)

Thinks your cool!!! Soooooo cool. How much information can you fit in your brain????? THAT MUCH???????? OH MY GOD THAT IS SO COOL TELL ME ABOUT THE HISTORY OF TETRIS AGAIN

Not to be spicy.... but like... he honestly thinks your piercing and dyed hair is so sexy. Like. And he is not afraid to tell you too.

"..." "Denki?" "You look hot." "Uh... Thanks? Why'd you say that?" "Cause you look hot duh"

"Thank you????? love you???"

just showers you in love. And if you get harrassed or get called annoying, may god/jesus/allah/oprah/beyonce have mercy on their souls because Kaminari can and will vibe check them out of this plane of existence.

ughhh yall are so in love, get away from me people with happy relatonships eww

Thanks again for this, it was a whole lot of fun!!! Hope you like pikachu over here, thought you guys would mesh really well. :D

#mha matchup #bnha matchups #denki kaminari

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vinnival · 3 years ago

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Uhh I know its closed but sorry if this is awkward im a 5'0 choppy short hair i wear sliver glasses and i draw alot uhhh i like weird animals and games i stutter alot I am a lazy shit and I'm a coward also I hate the outside (because it scares me) uhh i get sad sometimes also my hair looks black at first but when there's light it's actually dark brown also i have social anxiety i think that's it but eh.

ah yes, caf !! you're very lucky that im ur friend but just rmr that you're not gonna get the "I can send something in when requests are closed" pass next time, okay? /nm <3 enjoyyy

You got a match! You're matched with...

Hank!

holy fuck he do a lil shimmy shimmy u go lil man🕺🕺‼️‼️

ah yes what were you expecting

Honestly tho he just fits you !!! How neat

There are many benefits. To being short

You were hiding out in a library, your temporary safe space from the shitshow that goes down outside of the place

No one else in Nevada seemed that interested in books other than you but whatever it also helps that books contain paper. Which u can draw on......

you Also ofc really hated going outside bc its so dangerous and you really don't want to suffer, or worse, die

You were stuck here since day 1, when Nevada began breaking apart. Luckily, the library was right next to a hidden bunker! Full of food!

So you chilled in the library (which was actually pretty well-built for an abandoned building. as I said, no one reads books anymore really, so everything of value was taken but the books all remained

Well, get used to reading LMAO

One day you heard a crash at the front entrance, and you immediately fit into one of your emergency spy holes in case an intruder came

Your eyes fell on the curious intruder, watching the tall figure cloaked in black as they wandered through

"Who are you?" Your voice spoke aloud before you could think

The person immediately took a defensive stance, drawing a pistol and dagger from their body and facing it right in your direction

A squeak immediately followed

"Gods- pl- please don't h-hurt me-e!"

They slowly approached to your hidey-tunnel under the dusty desks, gripping it and tossing it aside to reveal your small frame looking at him

You two just stare at each other, you breathing heavily in fear

After a good couple seconds, he backs away and continues further into the library

Confusedly, you follow him, a couple steps behind in fear that he'll turn and attack

He didn't, only looked at your stacks of books on your favorite weird animals and picked one up, skimming the pages

You were so confused wtf was he doing

You were so lost in your thoughts you accidentally bumped into him again

He turned to look at you, and you internally freaked out, but your mind was preoccupied with one question- which tumbled out of your mouth

"What are you doing here? Who are you??"

He only kept his goggles trained on you, not answering your question. Then turned away again

For the rest of his time there, he just wandered around and looked at books, then he left

You felt kinda sad, you kinda wanted to be his friend. He looked lonely

But, the following days, he came back at around the same time

Eventually warming up to your presence with him, he spoke few words at a time

You learned his name, Hank

He seemed to be surprised that you didn't know his name

That's what u get for being secluded in a library most of the time tbh

He likes sitting in silence with you and listening to you draw

You barely talk to him unless really required, so you were happy about that

Can't stutter if you don't talk, ez win

Likes petting your hair, complimented it once as well

You've made friends with the beast of Nevada how does it feel to Win

Likes it when you draw him, it makes him stim like crazy :>

I hope you enjoyed it caf <3

#madness combat #madness combat matchup #*holds caffee gently*

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recluseraven · 3 years ago

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Sorry, I gotta review this album. Just some of my favorite moments from each song and general thoughts😊 But beware, this is a loooong review:

Welcome To Horrorwood - Love the part when I got jump scared by the beginning drop even when I knew it was coming 🙃 Such a good opening song, the breakdown was fantastic

A Rash Decision - Based on Cabin Fever, unfortunately have never seen it, but it's on my list now. Such a catchy, headboppin' song. Makes me wanna dance tbh. The choir bit was amazing

Assault & Batteries - Based on Child's Play, which I only watched after I listened to the song, but it was great. I fuckin' hate dolls, fuck that fuckin' doll. "Hey, Andy! IT'S TIME TO PLAY MOTHERFUCKER" Absolutely amazing. "Mommy! Mommy! My doll is alive!" Also love. "This two foot tall demonic doll will make you his bitch." The best lyric honestly. The whole song is just really fuckin' neat, okay?

The Shower Scene - Based on Psycho, an absolute masterpiece. The iconic theme incorporated was...just fuckin' incredible. But a piece of advice if you're as paranoid and irrational as I am, DO NOT listen to the song in the shower like I did. It gave me the heebie jeebies, embarrassingly.

Funeral Derangements - Based on Pet Sematary, I only watched the 2019 version but it was pretty good. Honestly, another jump scary beginning for me lmao. But hot damn, this song is heavy and awesome. "Oh my god...GAAAAAAAAAGEEEEE!!!" Genius. The chorus is so fuckin' catchy dude, I love it sm. "I played with Mommy, now I want to play with you." Uh...demon child, late abortion that thing. God, Spencer's purposeful voice cracks...perfection.

Rainy Day - I am such a big Resident Evil fan (the video games), so this song was amazing. Like I loved all of it, but the chorus was the best part. Can't tell ya how many times I've destroyed my vocal cords trying to sing that damn chorus.

Hip To Be Scared - AMERICAN PSYCHO, MY BELOVED. God just...ugh, everything about this song was perfection. The fuckin' 80's break in the song that turned into a breakdown...*chef's kiss* "HEY PAUL!" Screams, blood, gore, fleshy choppy noises. I love it. I love all of it. Sigh...I have to return some videotapes.

Take Your Pick - NSFW NSFW AHEAD......at that breakdown....I was throbbingggg. Literally, it was so sexy. I listened to it over and over and over...I've never seen My Bloody Valentine, but now I want to. The only thing I didn't really like was the "You'll be mine" parts, the voice is sooo annoying to me, which I guess may be intentional.

The Box - Sigh...never seen Hellraiser. Never really been a huge fan of body horror kind of movies like Saw, it just doesn't interest me. But the song was great! Lmao. Love the riffs, they're so good. I realllyyy love the chorus, so catchy. And the breakdown...unghhhh, I love a good breakdown. And Ryan Kirby...goddamn...I really need to listen to Fit For A King more

The Fly - Yikes, also never seen the Fly. Again, don't really vibe with body horror for the most part. But I might give it a try someday. But it's yet another catchy song. It feels more softer to me, kinda like the Love Bites of the album, but it's still amazing. "I'm not saying I'm, not playing God." Banger lyrics

Wurst Vacation - Okay, most of these movies I haven't seen lol. Hostel is now on my long list. But I fuckin' love the Rammstein vibes, along with the German lyrics. "Eins, zwei, drei, DIE!" Immaculate. The chorus!!!! I don't think INK can write a bad, non catchy chorus. It's impossible. and..."YOU'RE LIFE DON'T MEAN SCHEIßE!"

Ex-Mørtis - WELL GODDAMN. Haven't seen Evil Dead, but I have a feeling I'd like it ironically. This song is. so. GROOVY. It's incredible.

Farewell II Flesh - Now Candyman is REALLY a movie I need to see. But like, first of all, the Flight Of The Bumblebee incorporated in the song. Like...come on man, give me a break. Why is every song so goddamn clever. Ngl, I hate the buzzing in my ear, it gives me shivers, but I'll overlook it cause the song is such a banger. and AGAIN with the choruses ughhhhh fuuuu- Spencer's vocals!!! Fuuuuuuuuu-

All in all, this album was an absolute joy to listen to. 10/10, truly. It's so good and I'll be listening to it on repeat until my ears bleed🤘🏻

#ice nine kills #the silver scream 2: welcome to horrorwood

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your-ace-cousin-clover · 3 years ago

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hey, this one's gonna be long, so grab a chair and a snack.

first of all i wanna say thanks for the poetry recommendations! (I'll keep the anti-love poems and postcard from the heartbreak hotel in my back pocket, just in case...) always glad to expand my to-read list! :))

moving on: to be honest, no, i haven't read a lot of eastern poetry - mostly due to my past conviction of "reading translations sucks". but i've read translations of some arabic poems recently and there's sort of a melancholy that sneaks up with it? see, my grandfather on my dad's side is iraqi, but my dad never taught me arabic, so i'm always partly grieving a hypothetical what-could've-been.

anyway, i've checked out some stuff by tagore (& darwish)!

on tagore: i read "gitanjali 35" & loved the line "Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake." feels like a dam bursting open. i rly enjoyed "crossing 16" and "on the seashore" too! idk, but it feels like the last line in tagore's poems is the first breath you take after you finish running a mile? does that make sense?

on darwish: i especially liked passport & he is quiet and so am i! darwish seems like a very storyteller-ish kinda poet? and i like the rhythm of his writing; it's very.... alive? like if i stare at it too long it'll blink.

also, i gotta agree with you on ginsberg! i love, love, love vivid poetry and i used to really want to study film - because writing seemed (to me at least) like it lacked the visual aspect?

to answer your question about siken: you are jeff definitely hits hard, but i think planet of love might be my favorite. it's hard to pick just one, but something about the director/actor dynamic really speaks to me. the certainty of "you know your lines" & "you've memorized it" juxtaposed with the general sense of uncertainty throughout the poem feels very real? its choppy, the sentences are short, "there's a gun in your hand. it feels hot. it feels oily." there's a gun in your hand and each sentence is a bullet wound. and the way it ends! it builds and builds and builds suspense but there's no resolution, it's just tense. it asks whats next? and never answers the question. it just hits the brakes - suddenly you're rigid and frozen in time. it's being trapped in a fraction of a second and "everyone's watching, everyone's curious, everyone's holding their breath." and i didn't always like it, but somewhere along the line i started having panic attacks and it REALLY grew on me lmao

this ask is getting long, so i'm gonna end it here, but thanks again!

P.S.: would you maybe be up for giving me a poetry prompt? i could send you the poem in another ask. (might be fun)

-cat

Cat! :)

First of all, I want to complement your style of describing things. It's so poetic. Tagore like "the first breath you take after you finish running a mile" and Darwish like "very storyteller-ish kinda poet and rhythm of his writing; it's very.... alive". AGHHH, I squealed reading those lines, like what???? That is so fucking raw (Sorry for cursing, but ahhhh). You are poet in the way you just like talk about things.

Also, quick side note, I'm glad that the poems are in your back pocket. Hope you never have to turn to them, due to their nature, but if you ever do, I hope they help.

I'm glad you like Darwish and Tagore. "My father led my country awake" always punches me in the gut. It's so strong and emotive. I sympathise with you about the language barrier. I suck at speaking languages other than English, but I'm not a native english speaker. So even I want to enjoy poetry in languages than English, I have to read the translations which puts a damper on it. But, God bless translations, I love the way you described it in your last post that makes them seem so pure and the fact that someone weighted all these words to convey a human emotion across a pages and across ages is just.. mwah.

Ginsberg is my shit. (Again sorry!) The openings lines of Howl hit my Christian Iconography Yearning, like the vivid imagery..? "angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night," I vibe with that feeling of wanting to reach divinity and holiness with your writing. The raw, exposed nerve of that writing.

And before like I got heavy into poetry, I also felt the same way about how 2d writing can be. But, then you have things that help transcend the page like : slam poetry or hybrid forms which combine writing with more dynamism like choreopoetry. But even within itself, poetry transcends the page, by drawing out emotion and just speaking to you. This was a piece I read a while ago that has performances online and is very acclaimed : "For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide / When the Rainbow Is Enuf." (Although it deals with very heavy topics though so heavy tw)

And I read Planet of Love! The abrupt way it ends just hits you so strongly and absolutely leaves you frozen. Have you read "Wishbone" or "A Primer for Small Weird Loves"? Both hit very strongly as well.

And I'd absolutely love to give you a prompt: "Saint Valentines". Does that work?

[And don't worry about long asks, they are funny to read through and answer :)))) ]

Look forward to hearing from you and reading the poem! Prompt poetry is pretty fun!

#Cat anon #Clover speaks #tw suicide reference #poetry

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daihell · 8 years ago

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Where It All Falls Chapter 7

Thrown into a hostile future, Dorian alone must find a way to save the Inquisitor and return them both to their own time. With an unsettling revelation, he is forced to reassess his plans but he's running out of time. Read the series Also on AO3

The Fade. As a mage, Dorian had dedicated much of his life studying it, and yet, in the past few years of his life alone, he had become more acquainted with it than he had ever thought possible. Then of course there was his lovely visit to the wretched place in the flesh at Adamant. One really does go to interesting places at the Inquisitor’s side. So he felt fairly confident assuming he was back in the Fade as he looked around at the swirling green mist. Most notable was the feel of it that ghosted down the spine and left one shivering. Really, there was no mistaking it.

Why did it have to be so utterly disgusting? Why couldn’t it look like the lovely castle he’d encountered the first time? Not that he was particularly eager to relive his encounter with the desire demon, but he did appreciate the lack of cold and damp that seemed to creep into his very bones. Was it because the barrier between Fade and the waking world was breaking down that it looked as it did at Adamant? He had a panicked moment where he feared he had camped too close to the edge of the advancing Fade and it had consumed him in his sleep, but no, he was definitely sleeping.

Dorian sighed. He didn’t have the time or energy for this. He had hoped that his exhaustion would lead to a dreamless sleep, but it seemed he wouldn’t be so lucky. Before he could attempt to force himself to wake, he felt a presence nearby, huge and oppressive like the heaviness in the air before a storm. If whatever it was was going to attack, it wouldn’t do to run just yet and risk leading it back to the waking world. One more thing to deal with; one more thing tearing the world apart and threatening not only his life but Elden’s.

“Yes, things are dark,” a surprisingly soft voice said, echoing around Dorian so he couldn’t tell which direction it had come from. “But it isn’t as hopeless as you think.”

Ah yes, of course. A demon was attempting to comfort him. Truly a sign that things were going to improve, he thought bitterly.

“Someone is always there to offer a hand when you need it the most.”

“What, like you perhaps?” Dorian asked. He couldn’t see the speaker, or much of anything here really; the swirling green mist obscured anything beyond a few feet in any given direction.

“If you like.” The voice was deep and calm, never rising above a soothing whisper, and the speaker was apparently oblivious to Dorian’s sarcasm.

“No thank you, I prefer not to make a habit of dealing with demons.”

“Wise policy,” the voice replied simply.

“Right,” Dorian said. “Glad we got that sorted then. Well, I should be on my way.”

“As you wish.”

“What, you aren’t going to try to stop me?” Dorian asked, suspicious now.

“Why should I? I simply wish to help. If you don’t need or want it, that is of course up to you.”

“No thank you, I’d rather not get possessed or murdered at the moment.”

Great, what was its game? At least the desire demon had been transparent enough to try to kill him once he had rejected its offer. Dorian had no patience for more games. Surely it wasn’t going to simply let him go. That was a little too convenient and Dorian didn’t believe it for a moment. Still, might as well take advantage of the situation. The sooner he got back to the real world, to Elden, the better. He turned to leave when the voice spoke again.

“I do hope he is all right.”

“And here I thought we were going to avoid the whole manipulation and subterfuge,” Dorian sighed as he turned back, looking around again for the speaker.

“What? Oh, I do apologize. You thought of him and I couldn’t help but sense your concern. I can tell you care a great deal for him. If you wish to talk, I will of course be happy to listen.”

“My, aren’t you just full of generosity,” Dorian said, voice oozing sarcasm.

“I told you, I only wish to help. Talking costs you nothing. If speaking of him will bring some manner of comfort—“

“Oh, no you don’t,” Dorian snapped, furious that this demon would have the audacity to use Elden like this. “You leave him out of this!”

“Very well,” the demon replied, voice still even and infuriatingly calm. “I truly hope you are able to save him.”

That was quite enough of that. With an effort of will he forced himself to wake.

It was easy not to care, or at least pretend one didn’t and bury the ache and the pain far away where one didn’t have to think about it. If all else failed Dorian could always drown it in research or, the old-fashioned way, alcohol. That was how he got through life, yelling and drowning and pretending everything was fine when it clearly wasn't. He couldn't do that now. He had let himself care too much, been shown how it should be when you were with people you cared for and now there was no going back. He didn't want to return to the person he had been, to the scraps of decency that had been thrown him on generous days, scrounging for something, anything, to cling to to survive the rest.

He loved and was loved in return and now that he knew what it was like, how it was supposed to be, he couldn't let it go. He had been shown what all of this could be, should be, without the agony and fear and dancing around like he was living on hot coals. He didn't have to be the most interesting thing in the room and he didn't have to hide anything that might be less than perfection. He could just be and that was enough. And he had been shown that even he deserved it. He hadn't thought he did, but now he knew otherwise and it was all thanks to Elden. He would cling to it, that knowledge and that love, and he would keep going. He would get through this for all of them. He would save Elden and this would all just be a memory.

And when determination wasn’t enough of a motivator, there was always anger.

When Dorian woke, furious from the demon’s prodding, his mind was already forming possible plans. He kept hitting one dead end after another and now he had a demon taunting him. He would not stand for this. He would not be defeated here and he certainly would not lose Elden to all of this nonsense. First Dorian would discover everything there was to learn about the oncoming wall of Fade, or whatever it was, and then he would travel south. The mages were gone, either dead or simply out of his reach, but there was still one possibility left to him. Before all of this had started, back in Dorian’s own time, Vivienne had erected a temporary Circle to allow anyone in the area to congregate.

The Circles had yet to be torn down or repurposed as colleges as Divine Victoria had planned, but many were still in disrepair or simply inoperable due to the mage uprising. Besides, since many of the mages would be coming directly from the Inquisition, at least those who chose not to remain and serve, it was advantageously located and served as a convenient place for the southern mages to regroup. If they had left in a hurry when all this began, it was possible they may not have taken everything with them. If there was anything to be found that could help Elden it would be there.

First order of business, however, was the Fade. Looking at it now, it was actually alarmingly close. It had been on the other side of a valley some distance away when he had gone to sleep but now it had devoured all of that and a few rolling hills were all that stood between it and Dorian.

He approached cautiously to what felt like a safe enough distance from any prowling demons and began throwing magic at the impossibly huge wall. It reacted the same way rifts did, pulling the magic into itself greedily. All right then, how about a stone? He found a decently sized one and lobbed it. It vanished through without a sound, just as the rocks Sera often threw into rifts did. Well, this was fruitless. Still, it was fascinating and he tried lobbing a few more items of various sizes before admitting that, without any real equipment, there wasn’t much he could learn. He might as well get started on the arduous journey back south.

It was infinitely frustrating traveling back south knowing he had wasted so much time. The days were becoming a blur now of miserable weather and tedious walking. He had always hated traveling but now on his own it was positively miserable. He occupied himself by wracking his mind for any scrap of knowledge or theorem he had ever learned that might give him an idea of where to even begin saving Elden.

Unfortunately everything was theoretical at this point since even if he did come up with something he wouldn’t be able to test it until he was back at Elden’s side. The Anchor was a problem all on its own and Dorian decided it would be best for him to focus on getting himself and Elden back to their proper time. He could worry about the mark trying to kill Elden when there were other mages around to help him study it.

He found sleeping difficult and instead spent his nights huddled beside his campfire filling his notebook with countless calculations and possibilities, trying to recreate the work he had done with Alexius. He was getting more and more desperate, crossing more and more possibilities off of his list. He was concentrating so hard he didn’t notice the presence slip into his mind as he wrote down more possible calculations.

No, that won’t work.

“Get out of my mind,” Dorian sighed in annoyance. It was that blasted demon he had encountered while camped out at the edge of the world. Honestly, he was surprised he hadn’t heard from it sooner. Usually demons should only be able to reach him in dreams or times of great distress or weakness, but with the world falling apart he supposed this shouldn't be all that surprising. Just incredibly distracting.

You don’t need to speak out loud, you know.

“What can I say, I like the sound of my own voice,” Dorian replied, continuing to write down an equation.

Based on these calculations, you are attempting time travel, yes?

“Perhaps,” Dorian sighed. He’d lost the trail of his thought entirely now. Not that that was a particularly bad thing. The demon was right, his calculations were all wrong. He just couldn’t remember what he and Alexius had done to stabilize the magic. Maker, he was having enough trouble focusing without a demon in his head.

Not a demon. And perhaps if you show me more of what you are attempting I could be of assistance.

“Can’t you just read my mind?” Dorian asked. He was losing his patience. He did not appreciate having his thoughts spied upon.

Only if you concentrate on them.

Hmm, that was something at least. “All right then.”

The academic in Dorian was always looking for an opportunity to learn. He recalled memories working with Alexius, but he let the memories play out quickly, trying not to focus too hard on any of them.

Whenever you’re ready to begin, the demon prompted in his mind after a moment.

Well, it could be lying of course, but it was also possible some of his memories were still his own. He’d have to be more careful in either case.

“No, I’ve changed my mind. I think I’d rather like you to leave.”

Very well.

And just like that it was gone. Dorian was thankful at least that it was obvious when the demon was around. He could feel it there like an itchy weight at the back of his mind, causing his hair to prickle and his magic to buzz. No doubt the demon would be annoying him constantly. Dorian sighed in irritation and tossed his notebook aside. His mind felt foggy from exhaustion. If he wasn’t getting anywhere with this, he might as well try to get some sleep.

Dorian’s rations were gone. He was mainly relying on plants he could remember Elden pointing out as edible and he was just lucky that the lack of snow meant he had plenty to choose from. It wasn’t exactly filling which was why when he saw the ram he nearly sobbed in relief. He’d learned from his experiment with the nugs and made sure to keep his distance. He crouched low, making sure to remain as quiet as possible. As soon the ram stopped to graze he released his magic, sending a shard of ice slicing through it.

With a victorious laugh, he leapt to his feet and ran over. Perhaps he had gone a bit overboard with the spell as the body seemed a bit frozen. He was used to putting a bit more power behind his spell than perhaps strictly necessary. That tended to happen when one was more concerned with demons and their frustrating habit of leaping up and attacking again even after the most precise of strikes. At least a fire should thaw it out properly.

Dorian had, however unwillingly, participated in the cleaning of animals they had caught so he knew how to harvest the meat from the ram, but it was exceptionally more unpleasant than the nug or the fish had been. Still, he at least succeeded in getting a decent-sized meal out of the ram. Unfortunately, once it had been cooked, he learned that ice was also not the best for hunting. The meat was dry and tough but really it tasted like heaven after everything else he had been foraging.

He was just finishing his meal when he heard movement nearby. There was low brush everywhere blocking his view. He hadn’t seen a soul in so long it hadn’t even occurred to him that someone may have heard the noise he had made with his magic. His staff was held at the ready by the time he made it to his feet, but he wasn’t fast enough.

The disruption hit him hard. It was like an explosion had gone off beside him, his ears ringing as all of his senses went blind. His stomach turned and he thought he might be sick. He had experienced this enough to know not to reach for his magic immediately. A panicked mage reflexively trying to pull up magic that wasn’t there usually only made the symptoms worse and left them open for another attack. Instead, Dorian tried to focus, bringing his staff up to shield himself. Through the haze he spotted the templar charging him and was able to block in time. That was when he was struck from behind.

It was silly, really. He was so used to having Elden there to watch his back he’d forgotten. As he fell to the ground he caught sight of a face he recognized. It was one of the men he had rescued from the red templars. Vishante kaffas. He knew that was eventually going to come back to bite him. Then the world went dark.

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