#I'm presented with the capacity for great and terrible cruelty and it's tempting sometimes
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#the bad thing about watching Hannibal is it makes me want to grow in unhelpful ways#I don't want to heal I want to Become#and it's counterproductive to my social spirit and love of community#but it's so beatiful. I could grow in such fascinating ways if I chose differently.#I'm presented with the capacity for great and terrible cruelty and it's tempting sometimes#and I'm not going to choose that way because my life would be miserable and lonely in the way all the killers on Hannibal are#they literally show the unbearable longing for companionship. it's the whole fuckin thesis#so yeah I'm not gonna go psycho or whatever. but damn part of me wants to do fucking bad#dearest tumblr you hear me say such wack shit. anyway I'm gonna go eat some cheddar ruffles and feel better about myself
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