#I'm not gonna judge people using it but like... stop the mental gymnastics trying to make it so you're morally right

[medicinemane]

Side complaint that's slightly related, hate how my mom is basically... incapable of examining any choices she makes as maybe being less than ideal

Oh sure, she'll talk about what a horrible stupid person she is or whatever, but like... heaven forbid she consider that maybe trying to get away from amazon would be good, and that it's not about if it's possible or not, she just plain doesn't want to is the truth

[mokeonn]

Transmascs simply acknowledging that they face problems transfems don't tend to face as often aren't claiming misandry as a systemic force against all men exists, they are just acknowledging how their gender affects the form discrimination takes. 'Man' is not a default, ungendered state, and being a man does not lead to default, ungendered bigotry. This applies to homophobia, racism, ableism, etc and absolutely applies to transphobia. It'd be nice for men in all marginalized groups to be able to describe those intersections, without people deliberately taking the most bad faith interpretations of the terminology on a purely semantic level, regardless of what the terminology is or what it's describing.

As someone who once held the perspective you do, I believe you yourself would benefit from acknowledging your experiences as they are and unlearning the mental gymnastics and thought-terminating cliches required to degender your clearly gendered experiences as a trans man.

I'm gonna be 100% honest with you, men are not an oppressed group. A lot of men are oppressed, yes, but not because they're men. This was like, feminism 101. Men benefit from the patriarchy. Society was built around the idea that (white) men are superior. Man is not a default, but we live in a gendered society that treats it as such.

I am oppressed because I'm trans, because I'm autistic, because I'm mentally ill, because I'm disabled...

but not because I'm a man.

Have I been the subject of anti transmasc transphobia? Yeah. Of course. Obviously. But let's me explicitly clear here:

It's not because I'm a man, it's because I'm trans. The root of the specific bigotry I go through is transphobia. It's not "misandry", it's because I'm trans! The disgust I get for being a trans man is because I'm a trans man, not because I'm a trans man.

I'm sorry Anon but I'm not going to change my mind on this. I've been out as trans for over a decade now, and any disdain I get is not from my manhood, but because of my transness. Many men deal with bigotry and systemic oppression, but not because they're men. Every example I see trans man say is "transandrophobia" is based in transphobia, not misandry.

Like, I thought we all knew this??? Trans women face very specific oppression because they're trans, women, and trans women?? That's why the term transmisogyny exists? To describe the very specific oppression trans women face? Why would I use a term that involves the word Misandry in some way, a term we have lambasted for years now for good reason, when I can just say that what I deal with is transphobia? Because that's what it is. Transphobia. When I think back on the last 10 years of being openly trans, the bigotry I faced was because I was trans.

Use whatever labels you want I guess, I can't stop you, but I am gonna judge you for using misandry unironically lmao. Like yeah sometimes people are specifically transphobic towards trans men but it's because they hate us for being trans, not men, lmao.

Also, In my experience the guys who try to make these labels that are just repackaged versions of misandry are just like... generally unpleasant people to be around and they tend to not really interact with the larger trans community outside of other transmascs. They're pretty uninformed about the community im gonna be real with you. Like it really gives me the vibes of 15 year old MRAs who say men are oppressed because the patriarcy also hurts them. Like yeah, the patriarchy hurts everyone, but it specifically targets women. Just because you were caught in the crossfire, doesn't mean you were a target.

TL;DR: nah i've done a lot of thinking on it and it's just transphobia. And I'm okay with just describing it as transphobia. It doesn't need to be more. It doesn't "need to intersect with being a man", it's just transphobia. I'm okay with just calling it that. I've already reflected on my experiences and it's not a "thought terminating cliche" to say it's just transphobia.

I also repeated myself a lot bc I drank a cup of coffee before I had breakfast so I'm probably incoherent lmaooooo