#I'm insane for a trophy with limbs and a face

[me--and-ur-mom]

ermm I maybe draw trophy again

i love him so much you don't understand. Box looks so ugly but I love him

[portalhan]

👾 playing mario kart with han jisung!

couldn't sleep so i naturally started entertaining my crack delulu thoughts... very long tangent ahead. slight cussing lmao very half assed shitpost but i thought it would be fun (sfw, fluff ig?)

currently thinking about how you and han jisung would play mario kart together. the both of you are super competitive (although jisung is slightly more competitive than you are, but he'll never admit it lol), so your matches are always a huge thing.

he always picks waluigi ("yeah lol u laugh like that," he says. you don't.) and you always pick tanuki mario because he looks like jisung. he very violently denies it – always some variation of "my nose is NOT that huge" or "do i look like i have facial hair to you" or "i'm not even italian" everytime you bring it up. always grand prix and always at the highest speed because again, chronic competitiveness. you both also always spend a shit ton of time on vehicle selection because you need to really analyse which cart or bike gives you the most speed or acceleration – yes, it's THAT serious.

i don't remember which tracks belong to what cup on switch so i'm gonna go out on a limb here lol first up's superbell subway. you kind of eat shit because you keep hitting the bends, although you did maintain first place for a while before jisung pulled the most asshole move and sent a blue shell your way. "fuck you!" you shriek in devastation as poor tanuki mario blows up, but all jisung does is cackle. then it was his turn to fail miserably on wild woods – "why the hell do we have to fly so much! i thought this was about driving!" – he's visibly grumpy by the time this round was concluded. you finished 2nd but he finished in like 8th place because of how many times lapitu had to pick him up. as you waited for the next track to load, you pressed your body against his and gave him an encouraging little peck on his cheek. "one more?" he asks, you giggle. this little shit might be insane over mario kart, but he is still your (loser) baby. you oblige and he starts giggling like a little school girl lol

but the fierce competition resumes the moment the preview for royal raceway shows up on screen. this was a pretty close match, although jisung eventually pulled in ahead of you at the last minute. you were visibly sulking, so even though he kept rubbing it in your face right after, he eventually stopped to console you a little, rubbing circles on your back and pecking you on the forehead. "you drive great you know that baby," he says. preview for the next track begins to show up. "not as great as me though. suck it."

this was it, the final match. it was kind of a tiebreaker, so this would make or break the result. toad harbour shows up and jisung starts to groan. he grumbles something about the stupid bends under his breath. this was when you decided to play a little dirty. you carried on the game as per normal (jisung was only one place ahead of you the whole time), but by the time lap 3 began, you started bombarding him with neck kisses, while trying to maintain ur eye contact on the screen (maybe this wasnt that great of an idea), wrapping your legs around his, getting closer to him and cuddling him almost, as much as you could while playing mario kart anyway.

in very typical jisung fashion he would start screaming. a whole chorus of "what the fuck are you doing!" "stop!" "what the hell i fell off the path???" "this tram needs to get the fuck outta the way!!!!" mixed in with your loud ass laughter (maybe you did sound like waluigi? gross)... it was a whole tapestry. just a wall of noise. this was a sight to behold. in the end you both came in last, although you were 11th.

jisung just scowled throughout the entire award ceremony. neither of u won the trophy obviously but you were petty and loving this. once the round was completely over you propose to play another, but this sore loser was just Sulking. "you cheated, you cheater!" he screamed at you like a little baby. weren't you both adults? jsjdjd

"nooooo i'm sorry. thought it would be funny to mess with you a lil," you coo, before tackling him to the ground and attacking him with proper kisses this time. jisung might be hella stubborn but you were the only one who could break him this fast. "you're lucky i love you so much." "i know. i love you too. sorry baby." he started wrapping his arms around you and kissed you back – oh look, now it's a full on makeout session on the floor while the obnoxious mario kart theme played in the background.

[wheucto]

ok abnormal beings ii au list

fan as the internet. like the entire internet. his body is actually a robot he controls remotely since it would be pretty hard to put the Whole Internet into a robotic body, even if you are the internet yourself. that or just a database of the internet, but still very similar. he's still hopelessly obsessed w inanimate insanity, somehow.

paper was originally an inanimate piece of paper, until one day someone drew on him and he came alive. because of this, his limbs and face look hand-drawn. he used to live in an endless white void, where he found a rock and pair of scissors. they shared the same origin story, the same mysterious person who brought them to life and disappeared. they tried to search for them, but couldn't find them.

paper can draw things on himself, and they'll become 'real,' too. those drawings have that same hand-drawn look, and their inside (the parts inside the outline) will retain the look they had when he finished it (if it wasn't colored in, its insides are white. if it was made in marker, crayon, colored pencil, or something else, it'll look like that.). he used this power to populate the once-empty void he and his friends inhabited.

one day, he drew a door and placed it in an empty part of the abyss. it led to earth. eventually, he, rock, and scissors went through it. there, they parted ways. he still thinks about them.

paintbrush could be blessed with fire powers or something? be part fire spirit or something?

nickel can act out any part consistently, as if he was truly that part. he's done this as long as he remembers. though, if he tries to act as someone else, it's not necessarily accurate to that person, just what he thinks they act like. nickel doesn't think he has a true self.

through this power he competes on both bfdi and inanimate insanity. it solves the problem of having two conflicting personalities he has to keep up, but doesn't solve the fact he has to travel between the two shows constantly in a way that doesn't make anyone suspicious. somehow, he manages it. kind of.

i said trophy was a cryptid, but he's actually probably something else? i don't know what he'd be, but he has these things he's really particular about. like if he was an urban legend, there'd be specific guidelines on how to interact with him to not anger him or whatever.

he doesn't like people coming into his room without permission or knocking or taking his things. he always wakes up around 2 am, and he's more irritated when people come into his room at that time. he dislikes soap's spray bottle, but it always wards him off. he especially dislikes when it's in his room. that's HIS room soap. his SAFE SPACE. get OUT.

once he finds out he's whatever he is, he uses his new powers for Mischief. he appears in mirrors. paintings. he often lies and says these are part of the etiquette of interacting with him but if you acknowledge it he has to stop doing it. like if he was in a painting chilling and you told him to get out he'd probably have to leave. sometimes he makes up new rules and pretends like they're actual rules, but if you call him out he will tell the truth about it, unwillingly.

oj as like this powerful eldritch creature thing. he knows he is Not Normal and is very upset about this. maybe he doesn't know the extent of his powers because he just. doesn't use them and supresses them all the time.

i'm not really sure about details about his powers but maybe he can make things float. maybe tentacles...? like that come out of his liquid and... something about his juice. maybe it can just like rise out of him and do some Crazy Stuff.

he probably doesn't know he's an eldritch creature. like he knows whatever he is isn't the norm but not that. maybe his parents/creator eldritch creatures put him on earth to be raised by object parents for some reason? maybe these beings create worlds or something. or hide among objects? upon planets with life for reasons i guess.

test tube is more of a run of the mill mythical creature. like a shapeshifter or something. maybe an elf or fairy. she doesn't know this, and in fact doesn't even believe in mythical creatures.

the floor is the island and also some sort of eldritch creature. possibly him and oj are related but probably not.

i think it'd be funny if silver spoon was normal. like. just normal. he's the kind of guy to pretend to be something he's not as to make others think he's cool or something. though i guess he could be an elf.

i once saw the headcanon that lightbulb was a cyborg so i'm putting it here in this au.

suitcase with like an endless expanse of storage inside her. like you go in her and you find this abyss full of random stuff like chairs and sunglasses and various books.

goo as a symbiotic relationship between like two colonial organisms or whatever. one's his face and the other is the goo. both are like kind of colonial microbes i guess? or the face is more like a fungus or something.

goo's face belongs to a species of organisms which can like. change their shape at will and stuff. they can mimic things like faces, which they typically do, but they can also be an amorphous black blob. they stick to things, like rocks or the ground and sometimes other organisms (typically plants or fungi). their relationships with other organisms can be symbiotic, parasitic or commensalistic (neither beneficial or harmful), depending on the individual themself. they can send signals to organisms they lie on.

goo's goo is like a bunch of little microbes. sort of like a slime mold, but not really since i'm pretty sure slime molds are either individual cells that get together in desperate times or a massive cell with multiple nuclei, and whatever species goo comes from is made up of individual cells that are together for most of the time. cells can survive on their own, but like being together. the more cells there are in a goo, the more complex and intelligent it is.

one day, facey was doing normal face creature things like being on a tree, when he spotted a amorphous blue glob of Something moving around like an animal. curious, he attached himself to it, and sent a signal. surprisingly, it sent a signal back. since the goo was a person in its own right, but had no real way of interacting with others, facey offered to be its interface towards other people.

maybe goo can stay two people, one the blue glob thing and the other the face, but since goos are like multiple organisms which build up a person, why can't the combination of both facey and the goo eventually become one person?

tea kettle is a mother but like with teleporting powers and superhuman hearing and stuff like that.

lifering is the kind of mermaid that becomes a mermaid when touching water.

yinyang as two ancient spirtis in the same body. maybe they were always an object (and maybe then even the first object?) or maybe the object form is something gained later that they became for some odd reason.

cabby as a knowledge spirit.

knife as normal but observant. he can tell nearly everyone is Not Normal.

blueberry has some kind of amazing power but makes no use of it. 'what's the point...'

maybe clover as a luck spirit? but then she'd probably believe in luck. blessed by a luck spirit? half luck spirit?

tissues is immune to a lot of Abnormal Stuff that the other people on ii can do or radiate or whatever. otherwise he's normal

salt and pepper learned telepathy somehow. they can do that mental fusion thing now. they don't use that often.

maybe pickle as a werewolf? for some reason? gosh i dont know