#I'm in different aesthetic moods so I wanna look different. but my vibes are always consistent underneath.
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neverendingford · 1 year ago
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#tag talk#today is a sheher day. I got ma'amed by a woman today. men seeing me as a woman is easy mode. women calling me sheher means I've succeeded#it's funny cause this past week I haven't even been shaving I've just been showing up to work mildly (mildly) scruffy and being he him#but like. this morning I woke up like alright were putting on the voice and showing up to work in purple lipstick. very cool#I looked very good today and kept the voice all day instead of dropping it halfway through like normal#idk. I need to shake things up regularly. if I stick with one thing too long people start to slot me into a preconceived notion.#people start to fit me into a traditional cultural role and ugh gross don't fucking do that to me.#I think I'm starting to get a better understanding of what my gender really is. because like. it's not actually fluid. it doesn't change#I'm in different aesthetic moods so I wanna look different. but my vibes are always consistent underneath.#people relate to me differently when I present differently but I relate to them the same either way. they see me as different but I'm not#I think that's one of the reasons I do appreciate the ability to look fem. because there's a certain kind of dynamic that people fall into#and it's a dynamic I don't get at all when I'm presenting masc and have my voice lower.#idk. I feel like when men aren't being misogynistic to me they're often more open and excited about things when I'm fem.#like. they will stop what they're doing and talk about their construction project. their old cars. their vintage tape deck.#it's an excitement and joy that is often socially unacceptable between men. but when they see me as a woman they feel comfortable with it#and ngl I love being able to morph into whatever people need in order to feel comfortable talking about things.
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rrxnjun · 2 years ago
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well imean ur view on them matters the most so iguess i understand why u deleted them😭
SCHOOL IS THE WORST!!! can't even have free time smh i don't understand why school has to be this stressful that u are scared to even take a proper break from learning it's actually the worssstt😭
wait by recommendation do u mean like songs shows or blogs?:o or all of the above?:o KEVIN IS SO GREAT SO IM GLAD U HAVE THAT SOFT SPOT FOR HIM HE IS JUST TOO LOVELY AND FUNNY AND EVERYTHING!! eric is one of the funniest in the group imo so i'm happy that u are enjoying them on hwaiting!!!! dude u should stan them actually their discography is almost immaculate (their new ost is kind of 😟 for me so if u ever start listening to them do not start with that) BUT I HOPE U END UP WITH THEM LIKE TREASURE LMAO i genuinely think tho that by looking at their insta/twitter pics u would probably love them like they are just so aesthetic and well i guess trendy (?) (especially q) but they are just so great and if for nothing else i think it's completely worth it for sunwoo��👍 THE PICS IN THAT PINK HOODIE WERE 🤌🤌 BUT THE TIKTOK THAT WAS JUST CRAZY I HAD IT ON LOOP AS WELL LMAO but u know i think this is a sign that once ur treasure era calms down a bit u should have ur theboyz era next hihi
MANIFESTING U WONT FAIL THEN!!! academic validation sucks ass i'm waiting till i be at peace with not getting good grades😃👍 probably university will help but i have to get in one first ig😭 but iguess i'm glad u are mostly at peace with it now (?) i be just can't imagine how rough it must have been to get to that point😭 (i hope ur enjoying the break from it then u will be back stronger than ever to write sometime in june ofc)
MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS TBH THAT IM GLAD I LOGGED ON TODAY CUZ IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO SAD IF I MISSSD IT JUST CUZ OF SCHOOL WORK AND U JUST COMPLETELY MADE MY DAY WITH IT ACTUALLY (liebestraum anon💕💘)
no bc school either takes up all my time or energy or makes my mood drop so much i dont wanna write anymore 😭😭 but i wrote a bit today so im happy happy happy maybe i can get something out even during exam season !!! also a chat w my friend about this one fic idea i had kind of convinced me to write for trasure after exams but....we'll see how that goes.👁
i mean all of the above i need all song recs and also content recs 🤭 i think i already mentioned that im a big fan of the reveal album so preferably something w those vibes ?? but im down for everything hihi. KEVIN IS THE LOML my affection towards him is the same i had for mark lee before i stanned nct 😭😭 theres always this one member that sucks me in and makes me stan LMAO. id love to be besties w eric btw. AHAHAHA "once your treasure era calms down" girl- 😭😭 i mean valid. ive always had the boyz in the back of my mind so this is surely a sign to stan. sunwoo is worth it❤
the moment i got into uni i experienced the BIGGEST gifted kid burnout like i never had to study all throughout middle and high school so i automatically thought im super smart and intelligent since ive always been a straight A student but uni was a wake up call and let me know that i am NOT as gifted as i thought i was 😎 so im putting a lot of effort to get C's and im good LMAOO. was kinda sad by the fact that its not A's but when i almost had to drop out bc of almost failing a class i was like yknow what fuck academic validation lets just....get this degree and get it over with. hope your experience is different tho bc i was crushed 😭
as always i loved hearing from u 🥰🥰 opening up my inbox to seeing your ask is always a "FRIEND!!!" moment for me DHSJSJ
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writteninkat · 3 years ago
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i - your grandma must have been strong
word count: 2,007
"I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you."
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You zipped your last luggage closed, huffing tiredly as you stood up. You looked around you- your empty room, your plain, pink walls that were once decorated with many posters and pictures, your floor that was once covered by a big fluffy white rug and some clothes and stuffed toys.
You sigh, smiling. You were surely going to miss this place. Your back tingles as you turn around to see your mother leaning on the door frame, looking at you with sad eyes.
"Do you have to go?" Her voice is soft and calming- it always has been. She's the only person who could ever calm you down especially when your father left the two of you to work at the Heroes Association in Japan.
"I want to be able to protect people. Children, women, the elderly... I wanna be someone people can depend on. Someone you can depend on." You place a hand on her arm which she covers with her own, he warm palm along with her soft smile about to send you to tears.
She nods, walking inside your room to help with your baggage. "The movers just finished loading up your other stuff. All we need is your excess baggage." She pushes the luggage towards the door, you mirroring her actions.
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She cups both of your cheeks, looking you at you with adoring, glassy eyes. It's your first time being separated from your mother in you sixteen years of existence. The two have always been attached to the hip, you traveled everywhere together, even as the two of you had constant arguments you could never stay mad at each other for too long.
She was the only one you had.
"Stay safe in Japan, okay? If your father gave you a hard time, call me. I'll pick you up no matter what time it is, no matter where you are. I love you." She kisses your forehead and you finally let your tears fall as you wrap your hands around her thing wrists.
"I love you so much mom." You sob, hanging your head as your mother wrapped her arms around you. You hear a voice of a woman through the speakers, telling you your flight was taking off in a few minutes.
You quickly give your mother a kiss on the cheek before letting one of your guards assist you with your bags. You waved good bye to your mom and soon after, your trusted body guard.
You were on your way to Japan, to a new life, a new school, new friends and hopefully to reach your new goal: to prove yourself worthy of becoming a hero without your father's help.
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You walk towards the giant gates of UA, taking a deep breath before finally taking a step inside the campus. Your heart thumped on your chest nervously as your palms began to prespire. You kept your eyes forward, not wanting to do anything with the teens around you as your only goal was to pass the entrance exam. You walked inside the building you were lead to, taking a seat at the very back in fear of attracting any unwanted attention.
"What's up UA candidates?! Thanks for tuning into me your school DJ! Just as your application said, today you will be conducting your exams in seven different locations! Your location has been assigned to you in the paper you were given." The loud blond man with long hair swept way to the back of his head announced, making you click your tongue. Not to be a mood buster, but isn't he being a little too loud?
You take the piece of paper he was talking about, eyes lower to read the letter that's written on it. Test Location: Battle Center C.
"Excuse me sir but I have a question." Your eyes fall to a purple-headed boy with glasses whose hand is raised. The blond teacher acknowledges him and he begins talking about how there are four villains in the paper you were given and not only three.
He then begins running his mouth about how a minor mistake such as this would be an embarrassment for a school such as UA. You scoff, muttering something about having a stick up his ass.
After the teacher ended his speech, you along with the other students began piling out of the room and to your designated battle centers. As you enter your specified location, you take out the black leather gloves from your pocket, wearing them. You clenched and unclenched your hands to make sure that it fit you well.
"Hey grandma." An unfamiliar voice catches your attention, unfortunately for you the rude nickname was directed towards you.
"Grandma?" You raise a brow, unsure what he meant by it.
"You white hair reminds me of my grandma's." He snickers, pointing at the white streaks of hair you have beside either sides of your face as a few other students chuckling behind him. He looks plain, very, very boring. "Why don't you give up on this exam, grandma? Your knees may start hurting."
The signal went off and the robots began moving behind you. As you kept a straight face, your hands begin glowing a blinding white light as a black with blue and silver accent claymore appears in your hands. You run to your left, applying your speed quirk as you ran towards the gigantic robots, swinging your sword vertically.
The slash creates the same blinding white light, the robots, the buildings and concrete ground that the light touches all disintegrating into nothing. You speed into the other robots, stealing the targets of other students as you accumulated your points. Once you finish and only a few robots are left, you return to your spot to where the plain-looking boy along with his little friends were still standing at, jaws hanging eyes blown wide.
"You grandma must have been very strong."
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"I got in." You say into your phone and you hear your mother squeal in delight from the other end of the line. A smile breaks into your face and you feel your phone vibrate, signaling a new notification. As you pull your phone away to see what it is, your eyes widen in surprise as you read your notification banner.
'Mom' sent you $100.
"Mom what the heck is the money for?" You chuckle. "I'm not there with you but I want you to celebrate getting into UA. So go use the money and spoil yourself."
"Mom you don't have to-"
"Okay, mom mode off. I demand you go and award yourself eith the money I sent you." Your mom's tone switches from soft and caring to cold and demanding, making you chuckle. "That doesn't suit you at all." You laugh, you can practically /hear/ your mom pout at the other line.
"Okay, okay. I'll do as you say. Thank you, mom. I love you."
"I love you more my baby."
The call ends and you change out of your usual sweats and oversized tee. You put on a black spaghetti strap and high-wasted mom jeans. You hoop in a black belt and fold the ankles of your pants to show your white sock inside your checkered vans. You finish the look with medium-sized hoop earrings and a oversized red zip-up jacket which you leave unzipped with one shoulder hanging off.
You step out of your apartment, pocketing your keys and taking a deep breath in. Japan is just so beautiful, the scenery, the buildings, even the weather was perfect. You strut down your apartment building, scrolling through your phone as you searched for cafes nearby. It was a five minute walk of calm and relaxing vibes. You step into the cafe, eyes darting around the adorable cottage-core aesthetic it had going.
"Hey my name is Mio. What can I get for you this lovely afternoon?" The cashier beams brightly, your day becoming better and better with every move you make. "I'll have a strawberry shortcake as well as a strawberr frappe with extra foam, strawberry syrup and strawberries." You beam back at her and she takes your order with a bright smile, tapoing away on the computer's screen.
"Does your life depend on strawberries or something?" A rough and deep voice asks behind you, causing you to turn around. Once you do, your eyes widen at the sight of a young blond with vermilion eyes. He looked around your age.
"I like strawberries. Is it that big of a sin?" You ask, soft smile across your face as you cross your arms together. The guy had such piercing eyes, those red orbs looked like they could trap you in them forever.
"Not what I'm saying, but if you're that much of a strawberry fan, I recommend their strawberry pop tarts." His eyes drop to the display fridge beside you and your eyes follow his, landing on the adorable little tarts with red jam on top of them.
Just as you were about to order them, the cashier speaks up. "Your total is 1,500 yen." She smiles brightly, making you pout. You didn't want to cause more trouble for her seeing as your bill has already been printed by the machine.
You scan their QR code, paying virtually as she hands you your buzzer. "We'll give you a signal whrn your order is ready. You can find a seat and wait there thank you!"
You turn around at the blond who's looking at you expectantly, "I guess I'll have to try your recommendation some other time." You smile at him, walking off to the table catering two chairs. It was seated at the far back of the cafe, away from the many customers the cafe had.
You began scrolling through your social media, liking the posts of your past classmates and chuckling at some memes you saw.
A plate full of the same tarts with red jam is placed on your white table and you didn't have to look to see who it was. "Is this you way of flirting with me, rubies?" You ask, looking up at him with a teasing, smug smile. His face contorts into annoyance, "Hah? Flirting with you?" He scoffs, "Not a chance. And who're you calling rubies?"
"Your eyes remind me of rubies. They're pretty."
The blond's face relaxes and you push the seat across from you, silently telling him to sit down. He does as 'told', huffing as he watches you pick of a tart and bring it over to your lips. You bite on it, eyes widening as the flavor explodes in your mouth. It tastes sweet but not the sickeningly sweet kind, it's soft soft in the inside and lightly crunchy on the outside.
"You look like you just ate food made by gods." He chuckles, "You look dumb."
"But it really does taste so good!" You've never felt this much excitement since you found out you got into UA. And that speaks a lot given that you've only ever felt this kind of feeling with your mom.
"I should have bought the entire stock if I knew you liked it that much." Your heart skipped at his words. What is this feeling? You felt nervous all of a sudden, you can barely contain your smile and somehow, you didn't want to go home yet. This is a very new feeling for you. It's kind of... scary.
"I'm L/n."
Idiot. Stop it.
"L/n Y/n." You extend your hand towards him which he looks at for a few moments before taking. You shake both of your hands with a soft smile, your thoughts going haywire at how soft his palms feel.
"Bakugou. Katsuki Bakugou."
You pull your hand away, finishing the last piece of strawberry pop tart on your plate before your buzzer turns on. You pick it up, standing up. "Thanks for the tarts. See you around, rubies."
"Call me that one more time and I'll blow your face up."
You snicker, smirking. "Whatever you say, rubies."
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