#I'm going 'mhh... I'd do a giant caldera instead' which is what I'll do as soon as I can just get myself to finish texturing it

[medicinemane]

Nah nah nah nah nah, you're... well you're speaking to you and you have an absolute point there, but what you're saying totally misses the mark with me

I'm not trying to build to a certain standard and comparing myself to others and giving myself a block because of that, I'm driven by a compulsion to carve a world that doesn't exist yet but almost does as I wrestle with my depression and trouble getting my brain to focus

Like to be blunt, more and more in minecraft if anything I'm arrogant. I'm not even saying I'm good, but I'm saying I look at other people's builds, sometimes even masters like Scar... and I go yeah... but I like how I'd do it better

So no my friend, my problem isn't I need to get more casual, it's that I need to get all these damn ideas out of my head

I need my brain to just texture the stuff I tell it to texture, I need to fight to grow my skills at stuff like exteriors and custom trees so I can bring my ideas to life with the skill they deserve, I need to get all these damn farms up and running so when building I can focus on placing blocks not harvesting stuff

I support the message of not holding yourself to expectations, but that's not what minecraft is about for me. For me it's about getting all these ideas out

Like I wouldn't spend a couple months working on wireless redstone if that's what I needed

I just need the power to create what's in my head