#I'm about to collapse from sheer exhaustion. the stress and the cleaning and all of it is taking a toll on me

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

I emailed my landlord to end my tenancy, which really means there's no going back now. I'm officially moving, so I officially need to get ready to move. Fuck

[facefullofsadness]

poly!aespa comforting you

gf!aespa x reader, university!au

fluff, 1.6k wc

quite frankly, I've had a terrible ass fucking day and honestly, the thought of just collapsing into the arms of my 4 gfs is such a pleasant thing to think ab. small warning for mentions of deteriorating mental health. enjoy (I love them so much).

your classes today span from 7 am to 7 pm, coming back home, however, just before midnight, having had to work on extra assignments or what not. you were so fucking exhausted, you didn't even get good sleep last night and had to wake up early too. your girlfriends were already home, aeri and minjeong in the kitchen while yizhuo and rina cleaned the house, all of them waiting for you to come home.

you'd usually be back by 8 or 9 during these 7-7 days, but once the clock hit 10, your girls started to worry. winselle had already been done a while ago with the food and ningrina had finished cleaning by the time they all realized you hadn't come home yet. jeong immediately texted you, asking if you were okay, a worried expression on her face. the unnies felt their heart drop to their stomach imagining the worst, the two of them exchanging a look of worry. ningyi was borderline hysterical, verbalizing everything wrong that could've happened to you, which ranged from rambling ab if your phone had died or lost signal to if you had gotten into an accident on the way home or someone had taken you.

her hysteria didn't help at all and just made all of them worry even more. rina tried to be level-headed about it and give rational explanations, to which everyone agreed. but the worry didn't subside once it turned 11. they all started becoming paranoid as fuck. and so, rina texted you, aeri called you, jeongie dm'd your socials, and yizhuo contacted all your friends. they had to figure out where you were and most importantly, if you were okay.

when honestly in reality, you just had ur phone on silent, not touching it, just trying to power through all the fucking piles of work you had to finish. when you finally did, you packed your shit and booked it, not even glancing at your phone and b-lining home, wanting to feel the warm embrace of your gfs. you finally made it to the door of your shared apartment, leaning your forehead against the hardwood and sighing. your temples throbbed and eyes heavy with exhaustion, your body barely able to move atp. but you gathered enough energy to dig for your keys and unlock the door.

the girls perked up when they heard the locks rattle. ning raced for the door and swung it open before you could unlock it, colliding her body with yours and burying her face into your winter coat.

"where have you been?!" she would exclaim, voice muffled by your clothes.

"ningie, that's enough, at least let her come in," rina said behind her, pulling both of you inside and closing the door.

she pulled away, and the four girls crowded around you, their eyes full of worry but relief as well. you ignore their gazes and rid of your outerwear, removing your shoes, taking off your bag, and slipping out of your coat. they followed you as you dragged yourself to the living room and collapsed on the couch face first. they all jumped a little when you suddenly screamed into the armrest, letting out your stress and pent up exhaustion.

aeri was the first to reapproach you, pulling your limp body up to face her, her kneeling down beside you on the couch.

"you okay baby?" her voice gentle but lined with so much concern.

you closed your eyes at the feeling of her fingers brushing your hair, suddenly feeling tears well up in your eyes. no, you wanted to say, I'm so overwhelmed and stressed and today fucking sucked. but the sheer amount of exhaustion and dread washed over you, making u unable to respond and also start sobbing softly.

ur quiet cries didn't go unheard, the three other girls standing around you on the couch feeling their heart break at the sight of you, just absolutely shattered. aeri's jaw clenched and her eyebrows dropped, immediately pulling you up against her body, you shoving ur face into her neck. the other girls joined just as fast, feeling minjeong move under you so u sat on her lap, your back being hugged by ning, aeri letting you cry into her.

rina crouched down in front of you and rested her chin on your thigh, holding one of your hands with her own, using her free hand to caress your cheek and brush the hair out of your face. the five of you cuddled in silence, your sweet gfs just letting you release all your pent up emotions, feeling emotional themselves watching you so broken.

you were in such a devastated state, crying and aching, feeling so tired and wanting to sleep but being so fucking hungry that your stomach hurt. but even in this moment, despite barely able to breathe thru ur clogged nostrils, the only thing you're able to hear is white noise and the sound of your hiccups, shaking against gigi's sweater, jeongie's lap, yizhuo's hold, and jimin's hands, god, you felt so loved.

you felt so cared for, so adored, so safe, so comforted, so warm. rina leaving the gentlest kisses on ur leg and hands, aeri placing small pecks on ur forehead and hair, minjeong caressing your skin under your shirt, and ning holding you in the most comforting embrace, mumbling to herself against your back ("oh my sweet sweet girl, I'm so sorry you feel so broken, I love you so much :((("). they felt so good, so sweet, like home.

sitting there for minutes to hours, just holding onto you like their precious baby (you are), never leaving your side for a second, making sure every inch of your body was paid attention to. it made you melt further and further into them, something u needed desperately in this moment (it's also cold as fuck outside). u stopped crying on your own, feeling the tears stain ur cheeks as they slowly stopped falling from your eyes, sniffling to recollect yourself (and not leave gross remnants on ur gf's givenchy sweater).

the sound of ur soft giggle made all of them look at u. you sniffle once, twice, hiccup, before mumbling loud enough onto giselle's skin, "fuck."

they all let out an amused chuckle or sigh, rubbing at your skin, your back, patting your head or hair, anything, anywhere, just touching you and making sure you feel their love and affection for you.

"I hate to ruin your designer aeri..." you pull back slightly away from her neck, bringing a hand up to brush at your nose.

"don't even worry your pretty little head about it my love, are you kidding? I don't care about this, especially not when I have the most precious thing in the world right here," she states so sweetly, kissing ur stained cheeks.

"I wet it..." u hiccup.

"it's not like it's the first time you've cried into this sweater. except, it was for other reasons," aeri snickers next to your ear.

karina scowls, winter grimaces, and ningning bellows with laughter. you playfully hit her shoulder and roll your tired eyes as she smiles at you with that adorable and sweet :] shaped grin of hers. jimin taps your thigh and you look down at her, "tough day?"

you nod your head with a heavy sigh, the two younger girls following it up with rubbing your body caringly.

"you should rest princess, let's get you relaxed, okay?" yizhuo behind you rests her chin on your shoulder and says against your ear, the other girls nodding in agreement.

you let out a silent but audible okay before your girlfriends get to work. helping you get cleaned up and out of your clothes you've been in all day, getting you water and electrolytes to replenish the amount of tears you shed, feeding you dinner, getting you ready to sleep in your bed. they all do this in such blissful and comfortable silence, putting your mind at ease and peace as to not stimulate your overwhelmed form any further. they were so calm and patient with you, speaking softly and treating you gently, making sure you were okay with every little simple yet thoughtful thing they did to and for you.

as the girls discussed silently with one another who would stay with you for the night, your weak voice raised from behind them, immediately grabbing their attention.

"please, I need all of you with me tonight. please stay with me?"

the desperation and sorrow in your voice made their hearts ache. they love you so much, like so fucking much. so of course, they did. all of you cuddled up together in karina's big bed, you snuggled up nice, tight, and warm in the center. the soft noises the girls around you made as they slumbered, making sure they had some part of their body touching yours, never wanting to feel you apart from them.

"sleep baby," minjeong's soft cute voice emerges from the dark, her face digging into your neck and placing the sweetest kisses against your skin, "you deserve every bit of rest in the universe."

a smile creeps onto your face hearing her genuine adoring words towards you. you hum contentedly in acknowledgement, shifting closer to the sleepy girl next to you. drifting off to sleep with an exhausted figure, droopy eyes with dark bags, aching heart, overwhelmed mind, but the bestest girls loving you, right by your side, all yours, all theirs.

[cozymoko]

Hi! I just found your blog, and I love your stuff♡♡ Could I ask for domestic headcanons for the mukami family? As in how would living with them (separately) be as their partner. Thank you!

DOMESTIC HCS W/ MUKAMI BROTHERS

Note: Hello~! I've been seeing you all over my feed lol, I'm glad you like it. I'm making them married if that's okay. Enjoy! (ﾟ▽＾*)☆

Pairing: Domestic! Mukami brothers x gn! reader

Format: Headcanons

WARNING(S): none

Want more Diabolik lovers? → Masterlist! ★

RUKI MUKAMI

It's almost like you're living with a prince. So perfect, not skipping a beat when it's time to assist you, (on a good day). One would think he's a mind reader with the way he reads you. It's as though you are a book brimming with such unimaginable intricacy, one he has studied word for word until it's engraved in the depths of his memory.

If he wanted to he could take care of all the household chores within a sheer blink of an eye. But what's the fun in that? Ruki cares for you, however, he will not do your chores for you.

As adults, the two of you have several things to tend to throughout the day but there's no excuse for falling behind on house maintenance. So unless you are on the brink of collapsing or he grows weary of watching you struggle, it's best not to anticipate too much from him, Geez, what a clean freak!

"You look rather tired this evening. Are you overworking yourself? Do not lie to me, this will only make it harder for not just you but me as well."

KOU MUKAMI

Your living situation is a secret between the two of you. Now being away from that secluded manor, he'd hate it if his new home was bombarded by paparazzi and deranged fans.

Kou isn't the greatest at cooking but he'll try his best. After living under the same roof as Ruki and Yuma, the skills he can provide are just as worthless as you'd think: Very. They made everything for him. And don't get me started on his cleaning...

The man's a sucker for surprises, no matter how big or small. It could be as simple as completing his portion of the chores or preparing a warm meal for him to come home to. It makes his heart race. Fret not because in this world the things you bestow upon others are bound to return to you.

"Hehe, you made all this for me? Wah~, I really am the luckiest man alive. Don't worry honey, I'll be sure to return the favor very soon~!"

YUMA MUKAMI

Upon the moment you moved in, Yuma had grown more protective of you. If you hadn't known any better, you'd think he's your shadow. A very large, imposing one, to say the least. Yuma fears that you'll injure yourself whenever you leave his sight, hence why he tends to hover over you quite often. At times like these, he reminds you of a mother with his seemingly endless nagging.

Yuma would be the perfect housewife — "house husband" for better wording. He can cook, clean, and is pleasant to be around the more you get to know him.

Life with Yuma is a whirlpool of emotions within itself as you never knew what was to come of you. Gardening alongside the man you cherished, lazing around 'til your heart's content, spending several late nights baking for the pleasure of it. You've done it all, it seems. But you know this is solely the beginning.

"Oi, sow, don't cut the fruit like that damn it. Are you tryna' hurt yourself or somethin'? Pfft, I wouldn't put it past ya'."

AZUSA MUKAMI

You may as well call him your "number one supporter" because ultimately that's all he's good at. Azusa does his best to aid you in your day-to-day tasks even if he's not up to par. Yet somehow his efforts were helpful in their own ways.

He is a great listener if you need him to be. After a long day of work, stressed and exhausted. what could be more tempting than a listening ear? Scream at the top of your lungs about all the things you dislike; kick and scream about your boss's irksome behavior. (Kick him, we all know he'd like it.)

Azusa is up your ass every waking moment. Whether you're cooking or even showering, he will be there. With cold hands lingering along the line of your waist, bodies pressed flush against one another. It will never be enough to soothe his shivering heart, which longed for you when you aren't near. It's unfortunate, truly.

"I missed you...so much...I hate when you leave me to go to work....just...stay, can't you? I promise...It'll be a lot of....fun..."

[lesetoilesfous]

i feel like "anger born of worry" is CLASSIC fenders, but i'm also 👀 at "impaled palm"

Ok, I tried my hand at doing both (haha) and I really hope you like it! If this wasn't what you were imagining, let me know and I'll try again!!

@badthingshappenbingo

Fandom: Dragon Age 2

Prompt: Impaled Palm, Anger Born of Worry

Pairing: Fenders

Characters: Fenris, Anders, evil/red Garrett Hawke, Isabela

Warnings: Sexual Assault, Attempted Rape, Torture, Mutilation, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Implied Domestic Abuse, Implied Sexual Abuse

Additional Tags: Red Hawke and Anders have been in a 'relationship' for a while, Fenris finds out exactly how fucked up it is, please mind the tags, hurt/comfort, angst with a bittersweet ending

Fenris hadn’t actually wanted to go back. Hawke had told them all to leave that morning, making no effort to hide the hungry way he was staring at his apostate lover. Fenris had been glad of the excuse, and he and Isabela had enjoyed a companionable few hours trekking back up the Wounded Coast, discussing her various adventures. They were in sight of the high bright walls of Kirkwall when Fenris realised he didn’t have A Slave's Life. He and Isabela had taken a moment before the always-exhausting climb back up the steps into the city proper, and Fenris had wanted to take the opportunity to do a little reading. But the book wasn’t there. With an anxious lurch of his stomach, he’d realised he must have left it back at camp - where Hawke and Anders were...exploring each other. Grimacing, Fenris had told Isabela he’d needed to go back. She’d offered to accompany him, but Fenris had assured her that if he could make it across southern Thedas on his escape from Tevinter half-starved and unable to speak the language, he could handle a few raiders on the Wounded Coast. Besides, he knew how desperately she was longing to see her own mage again, and as much as her intimacy with a blood mage discomfited him, he also found that he was reluctant to separate them.

By the time Fenris got back to their camp, the sun was high in the sky and the sea was crashing in white peaked waves against the shore with a light breeze. He’d found his book in short order, buried beneath a pile of rust red blankets by one of the tents. The leather cover was soft and warm beneath his fingers, and the weight of it released the stress that had been building in his chest ever since he thought he’d lost it. Fenris had been planning to simply turn back to Kirkwall, not interested in announcing his presence to the happy couple, mouth already unpleasantly thick with the smell of sex.

But then Anders had screamed.

The sound was short, strangled and bitten off abruptly. Fenris thinks he might not even have heard it, if the wind had been passing in a different direction, or the waves had been a little louder. But he did. And Fenris had spent seven years protecting this man’s life, and having his own protected in turn. So he dropped into a crouch and crept towards the sound.

*

Fenris’ first thought is that it’s raiders - that feels like the most obvious explanation. It’s difficult to walk quietly on the sand dunes, but Fenris had had no shortage of practice silencing his steps in Tevinter, and now his toes sink soundlessly into the hot sand. When he lifts his head over the dune, long reeds scratching at his skin, sword propped lightly against the sand, it takes Fenris several moments to decipher the image in front of him.

Anders is half-dressed. This much, Fenris had expected. His pants are a twisted mess of fabric around his calves, and his shirt is unlaced and loose, riding up his belly - which for all Hawke’s insistent feeding is still terribly thin. His hair is a mess in the sand, tangled and crusted with muck.

But there are no raiders.

What Fenris hadn’t expected was Hawke, fully clothed, face dark with a hunger Fenris had only ever seen on the battlefield. As Fenris watches, blood roaring in his ears, Hawke leans down and bites Anders’ neck. Anders keens, writhing weakly beneath the shorter, stronger man - much more weakly than Fenris expects. He wants to believe that this is playfighting, some kind of roleplay, the likes of which Isabela extolls in her frequent trips to The Blooming Rose.

But this flickering candle of hope is doused, abruptly, when Fenris tears his eyes away from where Hawke is mauling Anders’ neck and sees Anders’ hand, skewered with one of Hawke’s knives. The dagger has been driven straight through his palm into the sand, and his greying skin is covered in black drying blood, as if it’s been there a long time. Occasionally, as Hawke moves over him, tugging at his clothes, his fingers twitch convulsively.

At one point, Hawke’s hand moves beneath Anders’ waistband, and Anders’ struggling increases, suddenly, and Hawke reaches over and grabs the hilt of the dagger in Anders’ palm and twists it. Anders’ screams, again, and again the sound is cut off as Hawke leans down to kiss him, groping him with one hand whilst he tortures him with the other.

Then Fenris is running over the top of the sand dune, sword held high.

Afterwards, Fenris isn’t sure whether he should have killed Hawke. In the moment, it doesn’t feel like he has any choice. He kicks Hawke away from Anders’ bruised, bleeding body, and swings his sword like a batter hitting a ball. Hawke’s head detaches from his shoulders and bounces, briefly, on the sand as his body topples into the wet stand. Fenris stands there, staring at the man who had been his friend and ally for seven years. His arms hold the sword suspended in the air at the end of the movement, as if he had been merely following the familiar steps of a routine. But the blade drips blood onto the sand, and eventually the heat and the wind bring Fenris back into himself.

He hears Anders, choking on sobs behind him, and he drops his blade - not thinking about the coming tide. Anders is sitting, having tried to gather up his ruined pants around his waist. He’s trying to pull the blade out of his palm. Fenris stares at him - tries not to see the stains on his clothes, the bruises on his neck and collarbone and chest, tries not to notice the ways in which he’s exposed. “Use your magic.”

Anders laughs, and it breaks into a sob on the way out of his mouth. “No shit, Fenris. I can’t.” He sobs again, and pulls the dagger out of his hand with a shout, collapsing back into the sand, where he lies on his back, dropping the knife into the dirt like its venomous. For a long moment, he lies on his back, staring up at the sky, hand limp and greying, blood running down the beach toward the sea and staining the sand red. “Magebane. He poisons - poisoned my food.”

Fenris stares, feeling the anger and grief and horror that had somehow, miraculously, failed to hit until now becoming a hurricane in his head. “How long.” Anders says nothing, and Fenris walks closer. “How long has he been doing this to you?”

Anders laughs again. His lips are swollen red and bruising, stained with the dark cherry stains of dried blood in places. His eyes are red rimmed and puffy, and there are long red marks fading up into bruises around his neck. “I don’t know. Since the beginning.”

Fenris thinks he isn’t angry at Anders. He thinks, probably, that he’s angry at himself. But he can’t seem to redirect the flood now it’s started, like a river that’s already falling through a broken dam. “And your demon?”

Anders’ brown eyes slide to look up at him, “Magebane cuts off my connection to him. Makes him...quiet, and weak. He figured that out early, too.”

Fenris grits his teeth, sweating fingers curling and uncurling in his gauntlets. The sea beats ceaselessly against the shore. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

Anders squints at him. Fenris thinks he should be doing something: cleaning the cuts, or bandaging them, or doing something for the hand. But he’s caught like a fly in tree sap, unable to move whilst his mind tries to process the enormity of how the last few minutes recontextualise his life. “We’re not exactly friends, Fenris.”

“I would not have left you to this.” Fenris says the words with more heat than he means to, and Anders stares at him for a long, long moment, for once saying nothing.

Eventually, he swallows. “Well then.” Anders’ voice is weaker than usual when he speaks, and tremulous. He coughs, and starts again. “Ready for your first lesson in healing for normies?”

“Normies.” Fenris repeats, utterly wrongfooted by the sheer inanity of the man on his back in front of him.

Anders gives him a thin smile. “People without magic.” Fenris scowls, and Anders’ tight-lipped smile grows into a full-blown, crooked grin. “Lesson number one. If we don’t act soon I’m going to lose this hand. Might have lost it already. But we’ll burn that bridge when we come to it.”

[pettydavis]

I've been having a hell of a time at college. I've suffered from depression for years but its like coming to college went and emphasized every aspect of myself that I hated and booted my social skills back to square one. I'm a junior now, and I'm still struggling to connect with th few friends I've made on campus and now my depression has gotten to a point where its directly affecting my ability to function academically. I even had to take a year off so now my class is graduating without me 1/?

During that year off I spent a lot of time in and out of the hospital trying to learn coping skills and while I feel I've improved a bit I'm still not at the point I need to be in order to take on a full load of courses and I'm starting to consider the possibility of dropping out for good, at least out of the college I'm at now. Problem is I'll be a senior next year, and I feel quitting at this point might be a mistake. But I'm not sure how I can keep up with school in general. (2/?)

Anyway sorry I'm not even sure what I'm asking here, I've just been in a real rough spot for years and I feel super burnt out. (3/3)    

oh gurl, so i had to put on my beyonce favourites playlist and think about this for a bit.

i just wanna begin with, you’re not alone. i’ve talked about depression on my blog before, sometimes vaguely and sometimes in great detail. and i hope this doesn’t sound patronising or pedantic, but even if there’s no one out there you feel like you can talk to, i’m here. because i’ve been in your position not too long ago (not with school mind) but depression really took a sledgehammer to my life from 2014-2016 and didn’t stop beating me until i finally escaped my situation. i felt like my life was slowly rotting from the inside out, with me at the heart of the entire mess.

now i’m not sure this will work for you, but i’m gonna tell you the things that helped me get through some of the worst times in those years, and i hope perhaps you can glean Something that you can use to help you:

i did small things. like, every day i told myself i was gonna do one thing. it didn’t matter What it was, or how small, or how stupid. but i would pick one thing, and do it the best that i could. of course, there were days i couldn’t even get up, i couldn’t do Anything, and even if i could, i didnt do it to the extent i wanted. but that’s okay, because the point was that i tried. it really wasn’t about completely the task, either. it was mostly about distracting myself, trying to pull my focus away from my feelings and just MAKE something so i still felt like i was here, yknow? like i was still alive, even if just a little bit. and the days i didn’t get anything done? those were hard, because it really ate away at me, and made me feel useless. but when i eventually collapsed from sheer exhaustion from FEELING all these awful things, i’d just remind myself that there was always tomorrow, i could try again tomorrow. that i was still a person, and i got through the day anyway. what was nice about this though, was when i DID get something done, it made me feel good. it helped me survive some of my hardest days, and i clung to that sense of accomplishment as long as i could before the next bout of sadness.

i also talked a lot. to myself, to my friends (if they were around and/or if i was feeling particularly open and expressive that day), to tumblr, to my grandmother. i would just....talk. regardless of who was listening, or if they were listening at all. and if they weren’t, i would just come here, or write it down somewhere. just as long as i got to vent all these Feelings swirling around inside me, so i wouldn’t have to carry them with me all the time. it’s sorta partly why i decided to start doing advice asks some nights, cuz i feel like, there were times where i didn’t have anyone to unload to, and having even just One person listen is helpful. but honestly, talk. i know it’s hard trying to articulate sometimes, just how deep and intense and profound your sadness or anxiety can be, but getting it out really alleviates some of the pressure, ukwim? sometimes i would talk to my irl friends @thedionlee or @dibu-johndoe, who i was lucky to have cuz they were always there to listen to my inane nattering over the dumbest things. but even that relieved some of the anxiety i felt at my situation. i say this so much, but find that safe space for you, and just let it out.

eventually i felt comfortable enough to seek out professional help (which you’ve done already). but i think it’s worth mentioning that it took me awhile to find the methods that worked for me. it took me almost a whole year just to figure out what was wrong with my head (adhd and depression FTW! \o/), and it took me almost just as long to find what helped me. i talked to countless psychiatrists and neurologists, would see my GP near damn constantly, talked to everyone from friends/family going thru similar struggles to all amount of medical professionals and finally FINALLY found something that worked for me (a combination of talk-therapy and an anti-depressant, and an adhd medication). it will take time, but you WILL get there. you will find what works for you, and eventually those things will help you cope enough to get to something close to normal (i think it’s hard to describe just how NOT normal things will ever be again, but i’m certain you understand what i mean).

i just realised that during your stay in the hospital they may have taught you some of these coping mechanisms, but i suppose it doesn’t hurt to have a reminder that someone was and is going through the same things as you?

now on the matter of school, do what’s best for you. that’s always my advice in these situations, because the most important person in your life, is you. if you feel like dropping out might be a mistake, think about why that might be (provided it doesn’t cause you too much more anxiety, of course, cuz the goal here is to lessen the load)? what’s at stake if you leave college? are there opportunities that you’d like to take in the future where finishing school is a prerequisite? will be able to go back in the future if you do drop out? i know you’ve taken some time off to help yourself get better, but perhaps a tad bit more would help reflect on what you want out of college, what paths it might lead to.

just put some distance between you and your situation for a hot minute. treat yourself to something, or spend time doing something you love, or (if possible) take a trip somewhere (even if it’s not far, even if it’s just like, taking a walk every day or visiting a museum or Something). You just need some distance to think about it. because if you what you want is on the other side of college, maybe it’s good to consider trying to finish. but if not, if you feel like it may harm you in some way, emotionally, or physically, or even spiritually, then leave. if a big proponent of letting go of the things that hurt you, or the things you’re not ready to tackle yet. because honestly, you really can always come back to them and pick them up again. whatever you feel like will help your road to recovery, is the best option. if that’s leaving school and focusing on improving your mental health, then so be it. college is stressful enough, obviously. and miss depression, sis?????? she out here actin like she pays all the bills and cooks all the food and cleans and runs the shit when she wasn’t even invited inside. deal with her first if you feel like you have to, your life will continue once you feel better. never let none of these fools out here tell you otherwise.

unfortunately i’m not too sure how to help connecting with your friends??????? i suppose, just absorb as much joy you gain from them that miss depression doesn’t snatch, relish in the time you spend with them, when you leave them at the end of the day think about the nice feelings you had when you were with them and when and why they happened, it may help you recognise what it is you like about them or being around them. socialising is difficult, i know. finding new and interesting people is hard when you might feel like nothing will ever be interesting again, but i think in that respect, focus on or find people that make you feel good, or at ease, or just plain normal. and don’t worry about people graduating ahead of you, babs. take it from someone who JUST started going back to school, none of that shite matters in like 5-10 years. everyone’s path is different, and just because yours might come a year later (or 2 or 5 or 10 etc etc) doesn’t mean you won’t get there.

hopefully i didn’t chat too much shit to you, and that i helped you in some way. but please please please remember i’m (and hopefully others in your life) are here if you need anything, even if it’s just to vent. it’s like, 2017 is the year for healing bih, and just because you or i may need help getting it, doesn’t mean we don’t deserve it.