#I'm fukin dyin | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

catalystic-dragons · 8 years ago

Text

Tonight, on In The Dragon Cave -

“WHERE ARE THE CREME EGGS”

Rider frantically goes through cupboards while his dragon laughs from the comfort of the sofa. The creme eggs are gone, even though he swears he bought them. He has proof, but it doesn’t make them appear. He screams, for he does not know why he cannot have them.

UPDATE: He accuses his dragon of stealing. The dragon never even saw the eggs, mind you, so stealing them would have taken a great deal of skill. Pudding continues to allude the rider as he goes through cupboards AGAIN.

UPDATE: He accuses his dragon of not only stealing them, but hiding them purposefully for their entertainment. The dragon would have simply eaten them if they had found them, just like they did with the terry’s chocolate orange. The rider absconds to the bedroom to try and make sense of this whole business. He comes back into the kitchen and checks the fridge.

The creme eggs are still gone

UPDATE: “I’m going to instigate martial law in this flat if I don’t get my way. THE PUNISHMENTS WILL NOT BE LENIENT.”

He goes through the cupboards again, checking on top of the fridge, before complaining he has hidden them so well to prevent the very situation he implied earlier (dragon having eaten all said eggs) that he has outfoxed himself. When we move out, we will find five very moldy eggs. The dragon laughs, but refrains from commenting further as the rider goes back to dig through the pile of bags under the table. Just in case.

Update: Disorientation has taken hold. The rider, unable to comprehend a life without creme eggs, checks the microwave. Just in case. Muffled whimpers sound as he checks under his desk. He lays on the floor, a bewildered expression etched onto his features, before getting up to check the bathroom.

Update: The rider takes a break from his quest to Find The Eggs. His dragon is still quite mollified by this whole debacle. He swears he could order 48 creme eggs from Amazon, but it would not ease his suffering. Where have they gone?

Update: The quest continues. Donning his hoodie and shoes, he leaves the flat, seeking creme eggs in the car. His dragon remains firmly in place on the sofa. Why he must make a spectacle of himself, they will never know.

Final Update:

He returned to the flat with his arms full of creme eggs. We now have 70 creme eggs.

I’m going to bed

#the dragon talks #I'm dyin'#this is so funny #prince #r u fukin happy now #the creme egg incident

5 notes · View notes