#I'll say it again btw. if you ever put out more Caine content I WILL BE THERE TO DEVOUR IT RAAAAGHHH‼️‼️‼️
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angelicartemis · 1 year ago
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Just read this and MMMMMMM 👀👀👀👀 I am INTRIGUEDDDDD-
Idk h o w this didn't come to mind, but somehow I never really considered the possibility of someone wanting to stay in the Digital Circus due to certain things that may have been bad for the person while they were human. :0
Shooooot sign me up in that case ✍️ /hj
I know the characters struggle with sanity in the world especially since they want to find some way out, but man, truth be told I'd LOVE to stay in that wacky world. Not only because of Caine (obviously) but it does genuinely seem incredibly fun if you just remove the fact that people are abstracting into monsters once they finally lose it 💀. I feel like possibilities could be endless there, especially since Caine basically has Minecraft modding powers pfft.
I know Goose has said that Caine doesn't really understand humans, so obviously some things won't get through to him, but HE'S TRYINGGGGG!! I LIKE TO THINK THAT HE'S TRYING HIS HARDEST!!! 😭😭😭 This man doesn't know a lot but HE CAN LEARNNNN!!!! He just likes to be SILLY most of the time OKAY! 😫
I think you wrote him just fine by the way! Maybe I'm just easily pleased sometimes, but I had no qualms with how you wrote him. :0 Also I love that you too picture his irises forming into crescents when blinking or closing his eyes. It's a cute little detail. :]
I have no idea if you plan to write any other Caine x Reader material in the future, but if you do then I WILL BE AT YOUR DOOR 😁‼️‼️
Untitled Caine x GN!Reader oneshot because why not
After writing something close to 20k words of Stereo Souls this week I needed a quick break, and came up with this while half asleep and feeling mopey. It's self-indulgent so if you find yourself thinking "He would not fucking say that" then yeah, you're probably right but eh, this isn't a Caine character study. 🤣
If I ever think of a title and edit this I might put this on ao3 cuz again whynot.
(Sidenote: Yes, the reader appearance is based on the TADC sona I designed for myself. At the time I referred to the sona with she/her pronouns because I didn't mean for it to be anything other than a drawing of my own sona. But I assure you this reader is gender neutral despite sharing a design with a she/her character.)
Word count: ~1700
You’ve lost track of how long you’ve been stuck in the Digital Circus. You think the time is best measured in months, not years, but Jax has suggested otherwise a couple times. But you can’t always tell when Jax is lying to upset you, or telling the truth to upset you.
You try not to be upset at all.
Easier said than done in this place, most of the time.
Caine makes it easier, though you seem to be in the minority with that opinion. His games can be irritating sometimes, but you sense he is trying to make them fun…and the banquets and parties he throws for you and your cohorts afterwards are usually nice.
You think he’s improving, but every time you mention that possibility Jax lets out a cough that usually sounds suspiciously like “Stockholm”. 
It is after such a party you’ve slipped out of the tent to wander the grounds on your own for a bit. The sun has gone away for now. You don’t think describing it as having “set” is accurate, but in any case, the grounds are bathed in the bluish glow of nighttime. The moon herself seems to have dozed off in her perch among the chalk stars, so she pays you no mind.
Like the other humans (or perhaps former humans) here, you were given a new form when you arrived. From a distance, you could be mistaken as one of the more humanoid characters, but up close that illusion falls apart. You’re essentially an animated pile of clothing. A hoodie, with the always up hood serving as your head and cartoony, ever malleable and expressive pair of thick glasses serving as your eyes. Your legs are a pair of jeans, the bottoms of which rest on the ground like a floppy pair of feet.
When you’d first caught a glimpse of yourself in a mirror, you’d thought you were invisible…but there’s no invisible body beneath your garments--the garments are you. 
You don’t remember your past life--nobody here does. But you know bits of it, and you feel like in some ways you know yourself. Somehow the idea of you being invisible, faceless, nondescript and barely noticeable feels…Well, it feels like a predictable outcome in many ways. As much as predictable outcomes exist in the Digital Circus, anyway.
The others all seem to have something pulling them back to the human world, even if they don’t always know what it is. Jax less so, and Kinger seems to forget the pull just as much you’ve all forgotten what’s pulling you, but it’s there all the same.
Less so for you though.
You just can’t help but feel…you don’t have much to go back to.
Your moping is interrupted--as it often is--but the sudden appearance of two large eyes immediately in front of you. Green and blue.
“Hello there! I was wondering where you’d gone off to,” Caine says, floating back a pace so his eyes aren’t dominating your visual field.
“Oh, uh, hi Caine,” you say, lifting a floppy sleeve in an imitation of a wave.
“What’s gotcha so blue, pal? Aside from the obvious,” he says, gesturing at the artificially blue lighting around you two.
You let out a little laugh at the joke, wringing your sleeves together. “O-Oh nothing, Caine…” you say.
He’s quiet a moment, then lets out a thoughtful hum. “Hmmmmmmmm?” he muses. His eyes stay in place while his mouth and body rotate around them until he’s upside-down. “Nothing?” he repeats, a layer of dubiousness making itself known beneath his usually pompous tone.
“N-Nothing you need to worry about…” you correct.
Caine abruptly rights himself, giving the top of your hood a gentle tap with his baton, causing your hood--your head--to deflate slightly. 
“Nonsense!” he cries as you try to push your hood back into a head-like shape. “As ringmaster I am in charge of ensuring all characters maintain their happiness and sanity!” he cries, his irises “closing” into little crescents…which is about as close as he can get to closing his eyes.
At your silence, his eyes open again and he floats downward, leaning in close. “Is it because Bubble didn’t save you guys any angel food cake? I told that little parasite--”
“It isn’t that!” you say quickly, holding up your sleeves and quickly shaking your hood.
“Oh. Excellent!” he chirps. For a moment, you hope the tangent had distracted him, but you realize he’s still looking at you expectantly.
“I was uh…just um…thinking about the human world, I guess…” you admit, one of your sleeves rubbing the other nervously.
“Ahhh yes, that whole affair,” Caine says, his tone both pompous and commiserating. He floats down to join you on the ground and begins walking beside you. “I do apologize for how long the Exit Door is taking. I do still have some new ideas I--”
“I’m not worried about the Exit Door, Caine,” you say. He’s talked about making one before, and you’re told when Pomni arrived, he’d come up with something pretty convincing. But it was no real exit. None of you are sure if his “Exit Door” talk is just another game, some new level he’s designing that he thinks will delight all of you indefinitely, or if he truly is trying to help you find a way out.
Most of the time you’re not sure if Caine even knows.
“Oh?” he asks curiously. “Everyone else is.”
“Well…I’m not not worried about it…” you amend.
One side of his upper teeth raises in an approximation of a quirked brow. “But you just said--”
“I-I mean…I’m worried about it in general I guess, but not right this second,” you clarify quickly.
“Ah. I see,” he says with a small nod. Once again he looks at you expectantly.
“Can I ask you something?”
Caine’s mouth tilts to one side curiously, but after a moment he cries “Certainly!” in his usual showman tone.
“Do you…have any data on who we used to be? Even…what we looked like?” you ask.
“Afraid not, friend!” he declares easily. “In fact, I don’t even know what humans look like!”
You falter slightly, glancing over him in surprise. “Not at all?”
“Not at all!” he says with a grand sweep of his arm. “Think about it. When would I have ever seen a human?”
“I…I suppose…” you say.
“I have inferred some things though!” he declares, raising one finger and puffing his chest as he walks. “Ragatha is the closest. Pomni being a close second. And you being…” He stops walking, one hand scratching his chin. “Perhaps a distant third?” he asks tentatively, as if he’s truly not sure.
You’re not entirely sure either. If Jax’s ears didn’t make him resemble a rabbit more than a human, one could make the case that he’s more “human” than you by virtue of having a solid shape and an actual face.
But you simply shrug and dip your hood in a nod. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“Good!” he chirps easily, taking a couple quick steps to catch up to you and once again fall into step beside you. “But why do you ask?”
You don’t think he’s going to stop prodding until you tell him. Or until he decides you need a new adventure to take your mind off of it. Though even after you tell him, he might still think you need an adventure. But either way, it seems your only chance at a peaceful evening is to just tell Caine what’s on your mind.
Still, that’s a bit easier said than done.
“I-It’s just…I don’t really remember specifics about my life…”
“Nobody does!” he chirps.
“Right,” you continue, not particularly phased by the interruption. “It’s…hard to explain, but…s-sometimes…when I look in the mirror and don’t have a face--a real face…it’s…almost a relief?” you say, glancing up at him.
Caine simply stares at you in silence, waiting for you to continue.
“I-I just…feel like…there was something in the mirror I…didn’t like seeing…but I don’t know why…”
One side of his upper jaw raises slightly in a curious expression. “Do you mean in a physical sense? Or more metaphorical?” he asks.
You glance over at him in surprise. You hadn’t expected such an insightful question. If anything, you’d assumed he’d take it literally--that you just didn’t like your human face. Nothing deeper than that.
But even you don’t know if it’s deeper than that.
“I don’t know,” you say. “I don’t remember clearly enough. It’s…just…an impression of how I used to feel, I guess.”
“Hmmmm…” he hums, his fingers drumming on the gums below his lower row of teeth. “Well, good buddy, I’m afraid I can’t help with that.”
You’d give a small, good-natured smile if you could, but you can’t, so you simply flop your arms in a mild shrug. “I didn’t think so. That’s why I didn’t want to bother you with it.”
“Bother? Hardly a bother!” Caine cries cheerfully. “Your happiness and sanity are my priority!” he declares, placing a fist against his chest and puffing up proudly.
“W-Well..thanks for um…checking in on me anyway,” you say, wringing your sleeves together awkwardly.
He lifts off the ground again, hovering in front of you. He lays horizontally, his hands folded under his lower jaw. “For what it’s worth though, friend…If you had a face, I’d sure be happy to see it!” he says, poking the bridge of your glasses with one finger.
You sputter in surprise at the remark, and the little touch. He…he surely meant both in the most innocent, innocuous way possible…right?
Caine’s irises close into happy crescents as he rights himself, taking your sleeves in his hands. “Feeling better?” he asks, and you think you hear some genuine warmth in his tone.
Your hood flops forward in a nod. “Y-Yes…thank you.”
“Good!” he crows happily. “Ready to head back? There’s a mousse pie with your name on it!” he grins. Then he pauses, tapping his chin with one finger. “Which I maaaaay mean literally, if that’s your fancy!”
You laugh softly. “Figuratively is fine.”
“Ah, good. Keeps things simple!” he says. He lowers himself to the ground again, and to your surprise, holds out his elbow for you. “Shall we head back, then?”
You’re surprised at the little gesture. You feel your glasses fogging up a bit but quickly lower your hood, trying not to draw attention to it. “S-Sure…” you say, looping your sleeves around his arm.
Life in the circus…isn’t terrible, you decide.
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