#I’ve got a ways to go but I’ve given myself a really solid start

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

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[sitp-recs]

Eager for the Sky by @oknowkiss

Harry/Draco, minor Harry/Ron and Draco/Blaise (2022, Mature, 35k)

It was announced, just as the Triwizard Tournament had been, at the start of term feast. A year-long, international Quidditch varsity match — the inaugural Wizarding Academy Cup. In which Harry is Hogwarts' star Seeker, Draco is on the bench, and they both have a thing or two to learn about playing for the same team.

Draco hated that, the way Potter would sneak up on him, proving he’d been listening. He had always seemed to be caught up in his own head, never paying attention to anything or anyone but himself, but now that Draco was starting to know him, he was beginning to see the truth of Potter.

When I started this blog over two years ago, I’d write (smaller, but still) recs for every fic I liked. At some point I was reccing up to 3 fics a day and started bookmarking them all to keep track of my own recs - maybe that’s why I got more than 600 bookmarks lol - and it was really fun and fulfilling, but it also demanded A LOT of time and energy. As they both became scarce, I changed strategies and decided to only rec fics that touched me in a more personal way. These days I write recs mostly on a whim; it happens less and less because I’m not reading as much, sure, but also because it needs to be a frantic urge, almost like a trance, and it needs to hit me right after I’m finished a fic otherwise it won’t be fresh in my mind.

I’ve wanted to rec something from E for so long and after being left intrigued and impressed by any day now and licence to kill (two solid recs if you haven’t read those yet!) I couldn’t see what was holding me back. Now I ask myself if I had been waiting for Eager for the Sky. And not necessarily because it’s the perfect fit for my tastes - in fact, I barely read or care for 8th year fics nowadays - but because this fic found me at the moment I needed it the most. Coming back from a brief hiatus (that felt longer than life itself) right before Christmas last year, I can say that reading this was a refreshing and lovely experience, but also magical in many ways. And funnily enough, this rec has been sitting in my drafts, half-finished, since January. Once again, something I couldn’t figure out was holding me back until I saw this gorgeous binding post by @a-gay-old-time (go check it right now!!) and I accidentally found out that last week was E’s one year fandomversary! Perfect timing to wrap this up and post it as a humble homage to one of the authors whose talent I’ve enjoyed and admired the most in the past year. What a gift to have you in this fandom, and what a privilege to read this incredible 8th year romance!

Way beyond the delight of watching Draco and Harry fall in love over the course of a (very cool and inventive) Quidditch championship, I was so touched by the amount of tenderness, youth and heart this story coveys. There is something unbearably sweet about an enemies to friends to lovers journey that explores the wonders of being young and free to flirt, experience and discover. I could feel the joy of falling in love all over again through every line here, through every knowing smile and surreptitious touch. The slow burn is masterfully done in a way that never feels empty, boring or dragged. Every little moment brings new discoveries about each other and is important to bring them together as friends, and then as lovers.

It’s worth mentioning that there’s a fair amount of longing, UST and some infuriating delicious cockblocking but somehow the way it’s written and the context it’s given make the experience even sweeter and more rewarding. I was in no rush to see this over and found it very charming that they saw value in wanting, teasing, flirting, chasing. Because I really ready young Drarry I had almost forgotten how fun a pining Draco can be in all his teenage complexity, capable of signaling confidence, vulnerability, inadequacy and tenderness all at once.

His emotions felt so very real I could feel a lump in my throat, and I was especially moved by his genuine response to Harry’s prior involvement with Ron (Be still my Rarry heart!!! For those wondering: this is a minor but significant plot point that made my heart ache and grow twice its size, I’m so soft for this brOTP! By the way - side Rarry & Blaco? A fic after my own heart!). Even more brilliant is the fact that E published Eager for the Sky and July Tree pretty much back to back and these two fantastic 8th year tales complement each other perfectly. They got a very different tone from her usual edgy “mature Drarry” which I also love - and maybe that’s why I was caught off guard by how fast I felt emotionally connected to this softer, more innocent brand of love. Not to mention that superb art by @upthehillart - killing me softly as per usual, with the ultimate teenage Drarry headcanon what a treat!!

This fic was exactly what I needed and it gave me the delicious catharsis I was looking for without really knowing. It pulled me back into the fandom with its light, easy, unpretentious young romance, sprinkled with some excellent dialogue and charming banter that will make you laugh out loud at their sass, plus a sweet and delightful mix of curious, inexperienced but extremely insightful and lovable characters. I’m so happy I found this fic and that I got to write a rec for it! Thank you E for sharing this beauty and so many other fantastic stories with us - I’m delighted to share this space with you and can’t wait to see what comes next 💜

Read on AO3

[lamuradex]

Novella November: Day 7

@novella-november One Week Update!

A week already. And yet it feels like it should be longer.

Anyway, wordcount.

My Current Wordcount: 15,882

Alright, that's more than I expected. I've only just realised I've passed the half way point. I'll say, the TrackBear leaderboard is acting as quite the motivator. That line graph. I'm getting a little competitive.

Whatever, I'm enjoying myself. And it's a good distraction from certain world politics going on... More importantly, this is just a story I've wanted to write for ages, Ninth Realm, and I love having a good excuse to write with a challenge like this!

AND, as I did back in September for 40K in 42 Days, I'm gonna start posting large-ish snippets of what I've been writing with each update.

So, snippet time.

This snippet is an early pivotal moment in the story, where Angela is finally given a voice... literally. She's been mute up until now and has had some trouble communicating, with only a vague grasp of sign language and some written words.

Snippet below the cut!

Elsewhere in the building, Angela, as was now her name, was sat in a cell. The door was open, unlocked, and the bed given fresh linens. It honestly was just a barely decorated bedroom with a solid door and a camera in the corner. One of them, Hunter, had promised to switch the camera off.

She sat back on the bed, alone with her thoughts. She often was. Unable to speak, socialising was a rarity. But these seemed like good people, the friendly Pheobe, her nervous looking paramour, big kind Hunter, stern Mike, the man Reggie who she hadn’t really met yet… and then that pleasant doctor. Simon. Polite and caring. It was a long time since someone had properly cared. She wasn’t even sure how long.

Her dour thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. It waited, clearly expecting a response, but Angela didn’t have a method of answering. The visitor eventually worked this out, and opened the door, Pheobe popping her head in.

“Hi. Sorry, forgot you couldn’t answer. How are you settling in?”

Angela gave a thumbs up. There was nothing to complain about, really.

“Cool. I just wanted to come down and check on you. Also, I thought I’d bring you some clothes.” She produced a pile from behind her back. “Those bandages look a little chilly, you know? I’ve got nothing again the au naturel look, but I thought you’d like the option. Just some of Jess’s old things that she never wears. She prefers to make a statement with her clothes, as you likely saw. I think she’s also a bit bigger than you, so you might need a belt, but it’ll do for now. So… enjoy.” She put down the clothes and stepped back.

Angela accepted them with a genuine smile. She had no trouble with the au naturel look either, but now that she mentioned it, it was a little cold in here. And she did generally prefer to wear clothes.

“Also… there was something else,” Pheobe said a little more hesitantly. “I don’t know if this is stupid or not, but I made you something.”

Angela curved an eyebrow curiously. Pheobe produced something from a pocket, a small device on a strap.

“I know you can sign and everything, but I’m not a great translator. Simon taught me some last year, but most if it’s fallen right back out of my brain. But I saw the way you communicated using my phone, and Simon said you did the same with his tablet. Something to do with you… emitting emotions, like how I felt yours. So, I just thought…”

She handed the device over, which Angela took carefully.

“It’s basically just a speaker attached to a small computer. Repurposed an old phone with text to speech. I can’t guarantee it’s perfect, but it should work, and it might mean you can communicate without us looking at you or over a radio. And that’ll make Mike happy, if we’re working with you for the time being.”

Angela held up the little device. It was as described, just a little speaker grill on a box on a strap. She tested the strap for its strength.

“I was thinking you could put in on an arm or-”

Angela placed the strip across her neck, laying the box across the front of her throat.

“Or wear it as a choker. That’s cool too. It’s like a voice box!” she realised.

Angela clasped it at the back, and swallowed to make sure it wasn’t in the way. She nodded once it was comfortable.

“It should be able to communicate just like the phone.”

Angela sat straight, focused, and tried to focus her thoughts. To speak without moving her lips. To speak with-

“BZzztt… SPEAK WITHOUT-” the device blurted. Angela stopped. “I CAN… I can speak,” she said through the box, concentrating and lowering the volume. The voice was flat and monotonous, and just vaguely female, but it was a voice. She concentrated again. “I can speak,” she repeated, trying to fluctuate the tone. It barely shifted.

“There you go!” Pheobe said excitedly. “That doesn’t, like, hurt or anything?”

“It’s a little DIFFICULT,” the box suddenly yelled. Angela pulled her new voice back. “It takes effort. But thank you.” She said in her new flat monotone.

Pheobe was beaming. “It’s no trouble.”

“Thank you, Phay-o-be.” She paused, hearing the wrong sound come out. “Phay-o… Phay-o…”

“Maybe I can tweak it a little. Tighten up the text to speech.”

“Phay… Phee… Phee-Be… Pheobe. Thank you, Pheobe,” she said finally, genuinely aglow with gratitude, even if her new voice didn’t show it. “This is wonderful.”

“Seriously, it’s no trouble. I’ll leave you to work out how to use it. See you in the morning, Angela.”

“GoodNIGHT Pheobe,” Angela returned, managing regain control of her volume.

“See you in the morning,” Pheobe repeated, and headed back upstairs.

Angela sat on her bed, cross legged, thinking of all the words she could say. She picked out some that seemed the most important.

“Hello. My name is Angela. What is your name?”

And into the night, she continued to practice with her new gift.

[captainwinterrsoldierr]

Enemies? Friends? Lovers?

Jason Grace x Fem!Demigod reader

You walked through camp with a clipboard and go cabin to cabin marking off the cleanliness of each one. You sigh as you finally mark the last one and make your way through camp to return the clip board to the big house. You wave and say hi to a few friendly faces. In the distance you spot the newer boy at camp. Tall, Blonde hair, striking blue eyes and he is incredibly muscular. You shake your head of the thoughts of him being attractive. He is every ounce of annoying to you for no good reason. Sure did he already lead his own quest on his own and completed it? Yes he did, which infuriates you. The only reason he even got a chance is because he is a son of Zeus... at least that's what you like to tell yourself.

He looks at you and waves. You furrow your brows at him and he frowns confused. You look down and try to avoid him. That is until you hear the crunching of the rocks and leaves below.

"Hey Y/N how was my cabin today?" Jason asks.

You roll your eyes at him, "Good as always Jason what did you expect?'

You continue walking and he walks after you in your step.

“You dont like me do you?” He asks with a frown.

You raise your eyebrows at him but he continues speaking , “I mean I came to camp with no memories and you were always curt with me though I don’t know why.”

You tilt your head, “Does it matter?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “To me it does here a cute girl I find interesting dislikes me and I would like to know why.”

Cute!? He finds you cute!? You were disgusted and delighted at the same time. Jason was so beautiful it ached your heart but you could never admit that to him.

You shake your head and keep walking.

“Come on y/n if you’re going to treat me this way I deserve to know,” He pleads walking ahead and now walking backwards so he can face you.

Angrily you walk up to him and jab a finger into his chest, “I don’t need to tell you anything Grace! But I will say I don’t like how you’re treated like you’re the savior of our camp. You’re only getting that treatment because you’re a son of Zeus!”

You angle your face up to him. He’s several inches taller than you. Why must he be so handsome and tall. No no push those thoughts away. You furrow your brows at him and walk past him. But he grabs your wrist and turns you towards him.

“Is that really why you don’t like me,” He asks looking at you.

Your lip trembles with rage and sadness, “Yes! I’ve been wanting to feel important and feel a need to this camp but all I do is check cabins and mope around! It’s not fair! I want to go on a quest and help people!”

“It honestly might be a blessing that you haven’t seen the horrors that I’ve seen,” He murmurs holding your hand. You let him. Why? You don’t know.

“They didn’t give me that quest because I’m a son of Zeus. But I also wouldn’t have given it to someone else to save them of those horrors and nightmares. Y/N I may be a son of Zeus but I wouldn’t wish this pressure of being his son on anyone.”

“What do you mean?” You ask a frown to your face. You feel a crack to your heart at the misjudgment of Jason.

“Being a son of Zeus means everyone expects you to be perfect.. they expect you to be a flawless leader, a perfect solider but truthfully if it weren’t for Piper and Leo this quest would’ve gone sideways that I even doubt myself at times,” He says all this with a sadness to his voice.

“Have you always been treated this way?” You ask caressing his hand in comfort.

“Unfortunately. Me being at camp half blood is a bit better. I feel more at ease to be myself. But camp Jupiter. I was a leader there I was expected to maintain that and it was exhausting.”

He stares into your eyes. You really didn’t know any of this. I mean why would you. You disliked him and didn’t give him a chance the moment he arrived at camp.

“I’m sorry,” You start shoulders slumping. “I was jealous of you and it angered me. You deserve better than that.”

“It’s ok we all misjudge someone at some point. You’re forgiven and I still find you cute,” He states smiling and still holding your hand.

You flinch your hands back now embarrassed and flushed. “I uh you really find me cute?”

He laughs and nods, “yes I always see you around camp with that angry little scowl of yours, I would like to get to know you so how about I help you with marking the cabins tomorrow and then we can go sword training… together?”

You blush and smile, “ok fine I’d like that.”

He takes the clipboard from your other hand so he can hold it for you and together you continue the walk to the big house.

[girlamongstthewildflowers]

My Testimony

Hey y’all! Welcome to my blog!! I wanted to tell you a bit about myself incase we don’t know each other.

I’m a twenty six year old wife and mother of one. I grew up in a Christian home. Church every Sunday, praying before every meal and before bed every night. I had deep fear of God and of Jesus’s eventual return. I spent my whole life full of anxiety and fear. Any little noise I didn’t recognize would send me into a fit of tears and shakes. At the age of sixteen I nearly took my own life because I felt so lost. Like God had given up on me because there was so much wrong with me. Like I wasn’t worth saving to Him so why stick around. But I stayed. I kept trying and failing to be the Christian I thought I was supposed to be.

But in 2020 I took a step back from it all. I never stopped believing in God but I had a lot of trauma from my upbringing that made me lose interest in church and the Christian lifestyle all together. I spent the next four years going in and out of deep depression and hopelessness. It wasn’t all bad, though. Of course. I had a baby. I got married. All good things.

But through the spring and summer of 2024 I felt like something big was coming for me. Good or bad I didn’t really know. But I had a very scary thought going through my mind; “something is happening. God is either going to save me from myself. Or I’m going to end myself. I can’t see it any other way”. Then one morning I’m watching a new Christian movie that had come out and for the first time in a very long time, I cried. I was touched by the spirit in a way I hadn’t been in forever. This is something that’s always been important to me. I need to be able to cry for God. I prayed out and asked God to forgive me. After, I texted my mom and told her to pray for me. I knew now that I had done this, Satan was gonna come for me hard. And he did.

The next few months were hard. Habits I so badly wanted to lose got that much harder to let go of. I started church but was discouraged about having a hard time making friends. And life in general got very hard and busy. But then in October I decided enough was enough. I wouldn’t ride the fence anymore. I’m all in.

I was baptized November 3, 2024. And since then I’ve been slowly climbing upward. No matter how hard life gets. No matter what Satan throws at me, I’m solid. I’ve never felt so sure of my faith. What a comfort that is. To know where I’m going when Jesus comes back.

[roses-for-rosalyn]

The Patrol Tower

Chapter 4

read on archive of our own

other chapters (ao3)

Up to this point you and Abby had gotten lucky weather-wise. It was spring and for the first few days of patrol it was a temperate 60 degrees with a soft breeze. You had solid visibility and the added benefit of the comforting warmth from the sunshine. The city was growing greener by the day, the vibrant foliage taking over the drab ruins of Seattle, it was beautiful. Spring always breathed life into those around you, hope blossomed along with the flowers. The worry for food significantly dissipated, kids got to run around outside reminding people of the hope for the future, and best of all, patrols were a hell of a lot easier. 

As soon as you and Abby cleared the distance from the field to the edge of the city clouds rolled in. Muted thunder started to echo across the landscape and lightning crackled within the dark clouds. Rain wouldn’t be far behind. 

Abby starts cursing under her breath and sighing as she leads the way into the city. You and Abby start walking a bit faster to make it to the city edge in hopes of using some of the buildings for shelter. You each had raincoats, but they would easily get soaked through. From Abby’s reaction to the rainclouds you had assumed that she, like you, had also almost contracted hypothermia because of the thin ass raincoats. 

“If the rain gets to be too much, we’ll figure out somewhere to make camp.” Abby is walking slightly ahead of you, but she doesn’t bother to turn back to talk to you. 

“I would disagree with you and say we should just keep going, but I don’t want to get hypothermia again.” Agreeing with her creates this ache inside of you, it’s almost physically painful. It causes you to grit your teeth and take a breath before continuing. As you are trying to repair your sense of dignity Abby laughs. She actually fucking laughs. It’s brief, but it’s genuine, it’s not at you either, it’s at what you had said. 

“Of course you got hypothermia from rain, but I can’t poke too much fun, I’ve come close a few times myself.” She’s… carrying on the conversation? Jesus she must be as bored as you. 

You try not to overthink it and add, “It’s these useless fucking raincoats.” Abby laughs a little again and the pleasant conversation ends there. 

You and Abby had officially made it into the city, you start walking past old businesses and corporate buildings and you can’t help but marvel at it. Your mind tended to wander when you were in the city, something in you yearned for the normalcy of before. You wanted to know what it was like to go shopping for clothes and jewelry, you imagined what it would be like to be in college. You had been told by older people at base that you were about college age. They said it came after high school, and you got to make friends and go to parties. They said it was like a taste test of adulthood before you were launched head first into a fully independent life. You think it would be nice to have some sort of preamble to independence, you really had no one to rely on for most of your life. You were fortunate enough to live where there were only a few infected scattered around at any given time. You were able to sneak past them most of the time, which was helpful. As a thirteen year old you didn’t have much of a chance against any infected. Once you got older you learned how to kill them if you needed to, but you honestly weren’t sure how you made it as long as you did. You survived practically alone for six years, occasionally bumping into groups of people, some good, some bad. The good ones always seemed to leave you in the worst ways. 

Raindrops cause you to snap out of your train of thought. You switch your backpack from your back to your front to take out the flimsy raincoat. Abby does the same, still a few paces ahead of you. It was kind of odd how she wouldn’t walk alongside you, but you chalked it down for a need for control. If she felt like she needed to lead, you weren’t going to put in the energy to argue. This part of the city didn’t have much shelter from the rain in terms of overhangs or canopies, so if the rain got any worse you and Abby would have to find someplace to wait it out. 

Of course soon enough the light sprinkle turned into a steady downpour. The raindrops collected on your bodies, quickly soaking through the thin raincoats, then your clothes. Abby is trudging on through the cold rain, her sheer determination propelling her forward. It wasn’t until she turned back to check on you and saw your teeth chattering that she started to consider stopping. You wouldn’t dare start to complain, you wanted to get back just as much as she did, but Abby saw you were starting to weaken. Your shivering was taking over your whole body, slowing you down. The way Abby looked at you was revolting. The pity on her face was clear as day, no way you were going to be the reason it took an extra day to get back to base. 

Abby stops in her tracks, turns around to face you and sighs “I think…we’re going to have to find a place to stop.” She hesitates, predicting your stubborn nature. 

“D-don’t be ridiculous, w-we can keep going.” Abby gives you a look, silently telling you to stop lying. 

“You’re shaking so hard you can barely walk. You’re allowed to get cold, you know, you’re only human.” When she says this it makes you realize she isn’t shivering at all, in fact she looks fine.

“How the f-fuck are you not cold?” You ask accusingly, the fact that she seemed unaffected by the rain was pissing you off. 

Abby just shrugs “I don’t get cold much. Now cut the bullshit and help me find a place for us to set up camp.” She starts to walk away expecting you to follow, but you stay rooted in place. 

“A-Abby I told you I’m fine. Let’s keep going please.” Abby turns back around and sighs. She begins to walk towards you, only stopping when she’s inches away from you. You can see every one of her muscles outlined perfectly through her soaked clothing. She towered over you, but you stood your ground, remaining stubbornly in place. 

“Look sweetheart, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. Either way we end up setting up camp. Your choice.” She isn’t even phased by your difficult behavior. 

Abby was about ready to scoop you up off your feet and carry you to shelter, until you caved. “Alright,” you sigh in defeat, “Looks like there’s a good spot over there.” You gesture to a small, stand alone building. The smaller the building, the less potential for being overpowered by infected. Abby nods and begins to walk over, you hobble behind her, weakening by the minute. She was right, you wouldn’t have made it, but you would never admit that. You’d sooner collapse on the pavement than admit Abby Anderson was right. 

Eventually you and Abby end up at the front door. The blonde reaches for the door handle and pushes, and of course it doesn’t budge. Almost every door in the city has a blockade of furniture  behind it. She begins using brute force, putting her weight against the door, her muscles straining against the wood. It moves about an inch and Abby huffs in frustration. 

She turns around, scanning the building, eventually her eyes landing on a small window near the front door. “We’ll have to try that window.” She suggests, you nod vigorously, desperate to rest. Abby peers through the window trying to see if there’s any life inside. When she doesn’t see any movement she uses the butt of her gun to break open the window. Thankfully the sound was muffled significantly by the rain, making loud noises in the middle of the city was a death sentence. 

Abby crawls in first, careful not to cut herself on the glass. You follow not far behind, it takes you a bit longer due to your weakening state. Abby offers her hand as support and you’re so tired you take it without question and jump down into the house, your feet crunching against the glass. 

The building is obviously an apartment, this room is the ghost of what once was a living room and dining room. An old couch sits in the middle of the room, a few chairs scattered around it. There’s a small hallway leading to another part of the apartment, probably the kitchen. The blonde moves towards the tall china cabinet sitting in the corner of the room and gets into position to move it to block the window. Before she could start pushing a screech echoes through the building. It came from down the hallway, it was close. Abby immediately halts her movements and ushers you over to her side. You move quickly and quietly across the room, huddling against the wall. You were positioned so if anything were to come down the hallway you and Abby would see it first. Soon enough a clicker stumbles into the room, you’ll never get used to their unsettling movements no matter how many times you see them. You try to breathe, but it’s like you can’t get enough air into your lungs. The creature is darting around making unholy, hollow clicking noises and Abby is just watching, waiting. You’re frozen in fear, feeling pathetic, you can’t even get your shit together, you should be used to this by now. Your breath becomes loud, too loud. Abby looks over at you, annoyed at first, but when she sees your wide eyes and flushed face she softens. Your eyes are glued to the mindless beast, terror taking over your whole body. 

Suddenly you feel a large hand grab yours. You whip your head around and watch Abby guide your hand to her chest, letting you feel her steady breaths. Her warm skin almost shocks your ice cold hand, but the feeling of her strong, solid body against your hand almost immediately grounds you. She moves her head up and down in sync with her breathing to help you find a rhythm, her expression remaining almost neutral. She wasn’t angry or frustrated, her expression made it seem like she didn’t mind helping you, or maybe that’s just what you wanted to see. Your breathing begins to slow and Abby starts watching the clicker’s movements, your hand still on her chest. 

Abby pulls out a makeshift shiv as soon as the creature turns around and nods at you before slowly moving away from your hand and towards the clicker. You watch as she quickly impales the monster in the neck, one last chilling sound escaping from its lips. It falls backwards into Abby and she catches it under its arms. She drags it over to the window, a trail of blood marking their path. The blonde awkwardly pushes the corpse out the window before jumping out and grabbing it once again, dragging the lifeless body to the street. You watch through the window as she washes her hands clean of the blood using the steady flow of water from the gutters. 

The entire action was extraordinarily considerate, but you’re sure it couldn’t have all been for your benefit. No one wants to sleep next to a rotting corpse. 

She crawls back inside and drags the china cabinet across the room to block the window. Once it’s in its place she slides down the wall, a relieved sigh escaping from her lips. After a few seconds she manages to catch her breath. You still haven’t moved an inch, you’re just staring at Abby completely lost in your own mind, shaking like a leaf. 

“Hey,” Abby waves her hand to get your attention, you realize she has probably been trying to get your attention for a hot minute. “You okay?” she asks earnestly. 

“Yeah I’ll be fine.” You still don’t move and Abby can’t hide her concerned expression. 

“Okay.” Abby gives in, she’s not your friend so why even bother? Why should she care? Maybe it was the petrified look on your face. An all too familiar look that she has had plastered on her face throughout multiple occasions. She wasn’t always this composed, this unphased. It took years of incomparable, horrific events to make her this way, it was like calluses had formed around her being, protecting her while also keeping her from feeling. 

You remove your backpack agonizingly slowly, exhaustion taking over your body. You begin to unzip your backpack and it’s almost like you’re moving in slow motion. Suddenly a hand comes into your line of vision, snatching away the backpack. 

“What-” Your words barely come out as a whisper. If this happened under normal circumstances you would have already snatched the bag out of Abby’s hands, but currently your body could barely hold itself up.

You watch as she quickly unzips the bag and grabs out your sleeping bag. You’re immediately confused as to what she’s doing. Is she… helping you right now? She kneels down, rolls out the sleeping bag and unzips it. Abby looks at you and back at the puffy, inviting sleeping bag, indicating for you to crawl into it and fall asleep. With your eyes half closed you still manage an eyebrow raise, suspicious of her intentions. 

“Seriously?” Abby scoffs. “You can barely keep your eyes open and you're fighting me? Come lay down sweetheart, before I regret helping you out.” You sigh and reluctantly crawl into the sleeping bag. Immediately collapsing upon your body hitting the plushy fabric. Your eyes are closed, but you feel Abby gently zip up the sleeping bag. You’re too tired to consider the fact that this small action could mean she might not hate you anymore, instead you promptly fall asleep, sinking into a peaceful oblivion. 

I know it's been like a month since I last updated this, but I hope you enjoyed <3

[atlas-of-galaxies]

Hi omg I adore your art (esp your yttd stuff) just. Everything about it is just so cool I’ve sent it to my freimds a couple times being like “YOO LOOK AT THIS COOL ARTIST” and I was wondering if you could/if you have given advice on how to diversify ur art? Like, I personally struggle wit the fact I can probably draw a total of 4 hairstyles and probably have a real bad case of same face syndrome, and while I’m really trying to practice I keep looking to your stuff as a prime example of good™️ amd was hoping you could give some pointers

Augh it’s late sorry if this makes no sense or is like single-handedly the most annoying ask you’ve ever seen

thank you so much for your kind words!! <3 I'd be happy to share some character design tips I've learned over time.

now before I start, I just want to emphasize that none of this is new or revolutionary by any means, nor am I an expert. I still have plenty of room to grow myself! I'll just be sharing my reasoning for specific character design details as examples of character design theory at large, utilizing my yttd designs as examples because I've had almost two years to get comfortable with my styles for them.

the two biggest things that have helped me in character design are to 1. emphasize the character's personality/identity/hidden agendas through their design and 2. draw fat characters. I cannot stress how important it is to get comfortable with drawing more body types. it is vital to character design diversity, and it sets characters apart in more ways than just color and hairstyle.

it is also the backbone of shape theory, which is an excellent, subtle way to clue the audience into what a character might be like. take my Keiji design for example:

Keiji presents himself as an upstanding, reliable person that others that can depend on - hence, his form is big, tall, and solid, like a sturdy wall. big, blocky shapes make up his body. but his body language is conflicting, with one open, inviting arm and the other hidden behind his neck.

what sets the viewer off about what he's really like is the expression. shady eyes, never anything wider than a smirk on his lips, permanent eyebags - whatever has happened to this guy, it's taken a toll.

I'd also like to take this time to point out hair, since you mentioned it; I'm a big fan of bangs as a form of character expression! Keiji's are shaggy and messy, nearly falling over his eyes to add to the shady look. as for the rest of the shape of the hair, I like to start from the part (easy to spot in my Keiji design - just look for the brown hair!) and go from there in either direction.

don't be afraid to keep it simple! I used to be unable to end short hair in anything other than a mullet because I wasn't sure how to resolve it, but usually, all you need is just a single line to define the back of the neck. and again, shape language is your friend here! just look at the difference between Sara and Joe's hair:

Sara's hair is easily parsed into angles and blocks - it is orderly and uptight, just like the image she projects as a star student. on the other hand, I couldn't even find regular shapes in Joe's!! the messy spontaneity of it speaks a lot to how he is as a person! Keiji's hair is somewhere in-between; it's got that blocky orderliness as a nod to his time as a policeman, but it's just messy enough to suggest something's off.

we'll look at Shin next. he's another character with lots to hide, but he goes about it a very different manner, hence the different build:

Shin is one of my designs where I think shape theory especially shines. without his protective scarf and big coat, the guy is tiny. he looks vulnerable and weak, and he knows it - hence his hunched posture, as if he's curling in on himself to protect his vital organs. it's like how cats hate being pet on their stomachs, you know?

add the scarf and the jacket though - and he actually has a presence now! he's still a bit curled in, but for different reasons: the scarf is heavy on his shoulders, quite literally weighing him down.

focusing on his face though - I give Sara and Shin similar facial features (long noses, heavily angled profiles) to emphasize their nature as foils. it's especially obvious here, I think:

despite being at such odds, they're very similar people - and small details in design choices can help clue the viewer into drawing these similarities, even on a subconscious level.

and I think that's all I've got for now! hope this helped just a little bit! good luck!

[couldthisbetrue]

Let’s Talk About...

I've never been so... Undecided about my feelings for a tv show 😂... I've been going back and forth between 'I liked it' and 'I didn't like it' for the past 2 - 3 weeks, until I realised that actually what I was feeling was underwhelmed.

  Ever since I started writing this review/thought post I’ve tried so hard to justify/explain away the shortcomings in Şahmaran to myself (that’s how much I wanted to like the show 😂) unfortunately me being me, I couldn’t ignore them no matter how hard I tried.

   I had/have been looking forward to Şahmaran since before we even had a solid storyline (since the only name attached to the tv show was Serenay's. I kid you not, it has been (at the very least) a year. So you can guess just how high my expectations for Şahmaran were (and they only got higher and higher as time went on with further news about casting/storyline etc).

On the surface it had everything to make it really good - a strong cast, main leads that looked like they would be  🔥 together and a strong, interesting storyline to match everything else it had going for it. Unfortunately, Şahmaran was also let down by all of the things I just mentioned. How so? Well, let me count the ways...

(Apologies in advance for the length of this post 🤣...)

  The cast/characters

  Probably one of the first things I learned about the show (after the fact that it would be about a shape-shifting snake) was about who was going to be part of it.

   I cannot explain my level of excitement on seeing Serenay back on tv after (what was it,) eight years or so? And that too in a show with such a unique premise? I was all like

As if that wasn't enough, Netflix announced that Burak Deniz had been cast as Maran. Call me superficial but two gorgeous people on-screen together, more importantly two that we hadn't seen paired together before? Sign me up! I was looking forward to seeing how the both of them would play off each other on the show.

   They're both brilliant actors so when I saw how their potential was being wasted on Şahmaran I was heartbroken. Oh don't get me wrong, the chemistry and the s**ual tension was there and it was 🔥 BUT I feel like their (non-intimate) scenes together were lacking the emotional depth that would've taken them to a whole other level, as it was though their scenes felt a little empty to me but I think that that had more to do with the depth/emotion missing from the storyline rather than anything else (because I’ve seen both Burak and Serenay (separately) in other shows and trust me, they have no problem bringing it).

  The supporting cast… First of all, let me just say I think it's a real shame that more people aren't talking about the supporting cast and their performance(s) in the show; from  Mustafa Uğurlu to Mahir Günşiray, Şahmaran is full of actors and characters that aren't getting the credit they deserve (in my opinion), Mustafa Uğurlu and Mahir Günşiray are legends of Turkish tv and it shows in their performances, the finesse with which Mustafa Uğurlu played Davut was brilliant, even when I didn't want to keep watching/fast-forwarded my way through episodes (because it was DRAGGING on) I kept watching and would even stop fast-forwarding on his scenes, Şahsu's grandfather's pain was almost palpable thanks to the way that Mustafa Uğurlu portrayed the character. And Mahir Günşiray as the slightly eccentric father but also with an air of seriousness (someone who’s used to being revered and respected) about him? I LOVED IT. Only he could've pulled off that character the way that he did I think.

  I can't talk about supporting characters and not mention the characters of Medine and her husband. On the face of it, I was left thinking (at least at first), 'What was the need for these two characters?' but once I finished watching it and went over my thoughts about the show, I realised that actually theirs was one of the most (quietly) beautiful relationships on the show, even with the lack of screen time they were given. I'm looking forward to seeing where their storyline ends up in Season 2.

   Mert Ramazan Demir - The first time I watched anything featuring him was Yalı Çapkını and I'm glad to see that they didn't change his character in Şahmaran to completely match that of his character Ferit in Yalı Çapkını (with how popular the character of Ferit has become with audiences, I actually thought they might) I liked seeing this more serious side of him, yaay for not type-casting! 

I make this next point specifically because of the 'The only reason Mert Ramazan Demir was included in promotional interviews/marketing for Şahmaran was because Netflix wanted to capitalise on Yalı Çapkını's success’ comments floating around, and as much as it pains me to say this - after actually seeing the show - I have to say I agree. As much as I’m all for Mert Ramazan living his best life (and getting ALL the success), going off the storyline, it would have made more sense for them to have Mustafa Uğurlu (Şahsu's grandfather) in the promo pics rather than Mert Ramazan Demir. I mean the guy’s even mentioned in the description for the show:

"When Şahsu goes to Adana for a lecture, it’s the perfect chance to face her estranged grandfather."

That seems like a pretty important character – and one that should be featured in promo photoshoots with the main characters – don't you think?

   In all honesty? I think all of the supporting characters I've mentioned and those of Bike, Diba and Hare (Maran’s sisters) are what made the unwatchable/boring parts of the show watchable. We need more of them all in Season two please writers.

   The Storyline

  I think that 95% of the problems with Şahmaran (or that Şahmaran had) could have been avoided/would not have been present if the script/storyline had been stronger than it was.

   Let me start off with pacing, you can have the best script/storyline in the world but if the pacing is off? It can spoil everything - and that's what happened in the case of Şahmaran - except Şahmaran, unfortunately didn't have the best script/storyline to begin with, but more on that later.

  Getting back to pacing, it was REALLY slow (at least for me). In a show about shape-shifter snakes, I expected a much faster pace than the one we got. Some viewers have said "Oh well, slow-burn relationship between Şahsu and Maran = the reason for the show’s slow pacing" but that argument doesn't work because you can have the best slow-burn relationship without it (the slow pacing) leaking in to the rest of the show.

   I tried to justify/explain away the pacing issues saying that maybe the reason for the slow-pacing was because they were really going for/playing in to the sleepy, rural, town feel for where Şahsu's grandfather lives hence the deliberate slowness, and okay let's say that's the reason why but then by that same logic shouldn't it have picked up once Şahsu got there? (Because her inadvertently shaking things up was the entire premise of the show) but nope it stayed the same. And again, I think that was because there wasn't enough substance in the overall storyline (so they dragged out whatever they could and ended up affecting the overall pacing of the show).

   There was no sense of urgency in scenes that felt (and were being acted) like they should have had it but that was just one of the many areas where the storyline was lacking to be honest. The majority of each episode felt like a filler episode/full of filler content with maybe one or two scenes (in each episode) that actually took the story just a teeny bit forward each time.

  The issue with pacing could have all been fixed (I think) if only the writers had looked towards the myth/folklore that the tv show was based on for help with more story ideas for their script. I mean you had/have a plethora of (different countries) takes on the legend of Şahmaran to pick and choose bits from, so why not pull from those? Actually, even if they didn't do that, from what I've heard, if they took more inspiration just from the Turkish version of the myth they would have had plenty to make the show REALLY good/something to talk about instead of this bland (for want of a better word) version that we were given.

The tv show was apparently based on this book which maybe explains the constant anti-climactic feel of the episodes and ultimately of the show itself (because sometimes what looks good on the page doesn’t translate well to screen due to time constraints etc) saying that though, I haven't read the book so I can’t speak to how true of an adaptation the tv show actually is of the book, but if following the book is the reason for the problems in the storyline then the responsibility was on the directors, producers and writers of the show and whoever else was in charge of taking the book to screen to make sure that what we saw was both as accurate as possible (to it’s source material) whilst also keeping it exciting enough to keep viewers interested.

I mean as a reader myself, I feel that readers and fans (of any book that is adapted for the screen) don’t want to see a word for word or scene-to-scene adaptation of every single thing exactly the way it was in the book otherwise they would’ve just re-read the book itself right?

  I talked (earlier) a little about how there was no emotional depth to any of Şahsu and Maran's interactions (aside from the intimate scenes) and I think that has more to do with the writers opting for the tell instead show angle when it came to their scenes together. There's a lot of talk about how hard Maran finds it to stay away from Şahsu especially seeing as they're destined to be together etc etc you get the picture but that's all it was - talk. I would have liked to see that struggle translated on to the screen, like-wise show me Şahsu struggling with her attraction to Maran and with the strange goings on in the town instead of just telling me about it.

  It's a shame really, there was so much potential there (if only the writers had been able to get a good balance between the storyline and the mythology it was based on) but it was all wasted and in turn, I feel like Burak and Serenay's talent was wasted too, they didn't get to show the full scope of their acting, and if I'm being completely honest, ended up coming off almost emotionless and cardboard-like in their performances at times (I've seen them both in other shows before and they were really good, so I don’t really know what went wrong here except maybe it was nervouseness or something, stemming from them not having worked together before? Or having to do intimate scenes together without having gotten (the time) to know or get comfortable with each other beforehand?)

   I've gotta say though the emotion really came through for me in the scene between Şahsu and Maran just before the season finished (not the one right at the end but the one just before it where Maran is asking Şahsu to listen to him, for those of you who have watched Şahmaran - and for those of you who haven't, I tried to be as little spoiler-y as possible 😉)

  Something smells Twilight-esque

  According to an entertainment website, the author of the book that Şahmaran was adapted from has previously said (apparently) that she took inspiration from Twilight when writing it (as her children were fans of it). I read about that before I started the show so I knew there may be some similarities to it, I wasn't prepared for just how much some scenes would remind me of Twilight though...

These three scenes stood out to me specifically:

  1) That scene of Maran joining his family at the town festival and them all walking in slowly together - it was very reminiscent of this one from Twilight.

   2)  The Maran - Şahsu - Cihan of it all was very similar to Edward, Bella and Jacob's love triangle, actually the love angle less so, but the animosity that Cihan has for Maran (I'm trying to be as un-spoilery as possible but 😕) definitely gave me Jacob and Edward vibes - especially when you factor in that Mert Ramazan Demir looks a lot like Taylor Lautner/Jacob from certain angles (at least to me and I’ve only noticed it in Şahmaran so far and only during certain scenes). I don't know if the casting directors cast the character of Cihan/Mert Ramazan with that in mind but

3) Maran's siblings' abilities matching those of Nikki Reed and Ashley Green's characters' from Twilight - this one was pointed out by someone else, it's been a LONG time since I watched Twilight so I can't really say for certain if they do or not.

  Overall thoughts

   There will be a Season two apparently (they finished filming it a couple of months ago) so maybe the bulk of the story/mythology is reserved for that season and this one was meant to serve as more of an introduction to the characters/mythology of Şahmaran? I don’t know, I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

Also, I think I have an idea of who will be playing the lady on the marble (again trying to be as less spoiler-y as I can be but

at not being able to/not wanting to spoil it) and its gonna get GOOD and twist-y next season! (at least it will if I'm right in what I'm thinking for the storyline ahead).

  Before I finish up this post, a special mention to the colour scheme used in the show and the almost spooky-like ambience/atmosphere they managed to create - that (and that kind of feel) was what I wanted more of in the show itself, it was all spot on, I really liked it. Oh and I hope we get to see more of Maran's sisters - with their own storyline's (independent of Şahsu and Maran's) in the next season.

I will (hopefully) be watching season two because despite everything I still see potential there and I want to see where the writers go with it (especially seeing as how season one finished). Here’s hoping the next season makes up for what season one lacked.

NOTE: Although inspiration has (apparently) been taken for the show from Twilight, Şahmaran is not intended/recommended for a younger audience due to scenes of a sexual nature

[crowandmoonwriting]

Writing Questions Tag

I saw the open tag @talesofsorrowandofruin, and I couldn’t resist!

1. What is your absolute all-time favourite idea you’ve ever had?

Oh, dude. I don’t know. There’s too many ideas now. The best I’d say, the most unique, came from dreams. I dreamt often, for example, about massive subterranean cities. I have a few stories derived from them, and I like them quite a lot.

2. Is there a question you’ve been asked in the past that really stands out to you and you still think about sometimes?

Oh yes. It was fairly insulting. I write dark subjects quite a lot, as a way of dealing with and processing my own trauma in a safe and productive way. I was asked once, “What kind of a person are you, that you write these things?” I replied that I was a creative one. The question arises in a lot of discourse these days, and I always wince to see it. You never know why people do what they do, or what demons they’re exorcising. As long as they aren’t hurting anyone, and are in fact healing, there’s no issue.

3. What is your favourite part of being a writer? What parts could you take or leave?

Losing myself in it. Escapism is a a huge part of writing for me, and whether it’s rereading something or writing something, when I forget myself entirely, I’m happiest. Oh that sounds melancholy, doesn’t it, lol? The worst part of writing is not writing. Thinking about it all the time and not doing it is purgatory.

4. What is your greatest motivation to write/create?

A lot of things motivate me! Music is a huge one. It’s why I have literally thousands of playlists lol. A bout of writer’s block can be broken sometimes with one or two perfect songs.

5. What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever read or been given as a writer?

Ooh well. I’ve read Stephen King’s On Writing, which has whole chapters I could cite. But really? The first real advice I read from one of my favourite authors, Anne Rice, stays with me: “To write something, you have to risk making a fool of yourself.” It’s helped me embrace my creativity and let go of some of my inhibitions.

6. What do you wish you knew when you were first starting out writing?

I wish I had created a decent method for novel-writing. I get sidetracked by other ideas quite a lot and find it hard to focus on one story. When I started out, I was just a kid, and I only had one story, and I miss those times for my focus.

7. What is your favourite story you’ve written to completion? Link it if you’d like and can!

So my favourite short story hasn’t been released anywhere. I want to find just the right place and way to publish it. Not sure if I want to include it in a book of short stories or just publish it alone yet. It’s about werewolves, and I think it’s a solid, disturbing little horror yarn.

8. What is your favourite out-of-the-box quote?

From my own work, or from my favourite books? I have a lot of favourite quotes from authors that I return to over and over. There’s one from J.R.R. Tolkien that’s really infused my creation of fantasy: “A safe fairyland is untrue to all worlds.”

9. Which of your characters would you say has the most controversial mindset? Why do you say so and how do you personally feel about their ideals?

10. If you when you first started writing met you now, what would younger you think?

“What happened to you?? You look terrible!” Lol. That would be the first reaction, from fifteen-years-ago me. But if we got to talking about writing, he would probably be shocked at how much I’ve built in my primary fantasy setting. “Languages?? Recipes? Wow this is a lot, where do you find the time?” And I’d reply, “Why do you think I look like I haven’t slept in 15 years?”

Tagging: anyone who sees this and wants to do it! If you haven’t already been tagged, also @writernopal, @sam-glade, and @contes-de-rheio.

[fanfic-inator795]

Big City Greens s4 ranking (so far...)

Overall, with its first 10 episode segments now aired, I'd say BCG s4 is off to a pretty solid start! A couple meh episodes here and there, but also some really GREAT episodes too! Going through them all:

Handshaken: Without a doubt my favorite BCG ep of this season so far. If you know me, you know how much I absolutely LOVE Bill, so it was great seeing him get to be a bit of a handshake badass in addition to his usual humble and sweet self ^v^ Seeing him teach Cricket a lesson was great, and the ep itself just had a ton of funny jokes and some great boarding. Remy trying to be 'country' was also cute and endearing.

Jingled: Honestly, it was a toss-up between this and Truck Stopped (it truly was an incredibly strong season premiere). Ultimately though I rank Jingled just a teeeeeenny bit higher since I really loved Tilly's jingles. As a creative myself, I definitely related to her whole arc. I also loved Cricket keeping an eye on his sis and encouraging her to take care of herself, even while taking advantage of a big company, haha. The stuff with Bill and Alice at the veggie stand was also really cute.

Truck Stopped: Another ep that's relatable, funny and has a great lesson. Truck stops and gas stations are a really fun setting, and for as much as they were bickering in this ep, it was also a great showcase for why these two make for such a great sibling team.

Chipped Off: This episode manages to be both hilarious and fascinating when it comes to showing what Chip has been up to since his defeat and exploring his mental state and the core flaws of who he is that led him to this point. Several jokes from this ep truly got me, and that whole scene with ‘Norm’ and the Mirror Chip was just SO well boarded and great to watch. Truly fantastic ep and a great way to reintroduce Chip (although I’ve gotta say, for as much as I usually like characters with glasses, Norm!Chip looks fucking cursed)

Stand-Up Bill: A very silly ep but also one I enjoyed, even if it was very much a farce. To probably no one's surprise, I enjoyed Bill's arc a lot, and seeing him form a genuine connection with Fred was super sweet. The stuff with Tilly and Cricket with the roast comedian was pretty fun too, and while their revenge on her was maaaaybe just a bit uncalled for (given that Cricket literally asked to be roasted) at least they didn't humiliate her in front of a whole crowd or anything like that. Just a bit of harmless slapstick.

Iced: I’m really glad this ep wasn’t JUST Alice and Nick fighting. Like Alice says, the whole Green family is kiiiinda a mess, so Nick truly does fit in in that sense. All the little subplots are both entertaining enough and are just the right amount of silly. These eps where each Green has their own little subplot are always pretty fun. Sorta standard ep, but enjoyable enough!

Coffee Mates: Pretty good ep! It was simple and perhaps a bit on the predictable side, but Cricket was in great showing here, being not only funny but also showing his responsible side as well as encouraging Gloria to be better and find her work/life balance. You feel a bit bad for all he goes through, but there's a light enough tone to it that it never feels like the kid's being tortured, and his strike afterwards was pretty funny. The ep also has a good moral, and it was nice to see everything work out.

Junk Junkie: Ehhhhh... A couple bits were funny, and I can certainly understand WHY Bill went to such extremes (I'm pretty sure the man has some sort of financial PTSD considering how many times he's nearly lost his home/gone bankrupt) the execution of the plot itself was pretty standard and didn't do much to really grab me. Not bad by any means, just okay.

Bad Dad: As the official re-introduction to Nancy's dad, I thought it was just okay. As I said in the post I made following the ep's premiere, I am glad that they redeemed Nick somewhat by making him respectful of Nancy's rules and having him actually work in exchange for living there. I also appreciated the ep for not totally villainizing Nancy's refusal to forgive her dad and not trying to force a 'fixed' bond between them - they make it clear that she's only tolerating him for the sake of her kids, but at the same time she isn't going to excuse or overlook any shenanigans either. It's not perfect by any means - I certain understand those who feel Nick still got off too easily or who see him as too bad of an influence to be kept around - but considering the type of ep it is, it could have been a LOT worse.

Green Trial: Okay so... Personal bias on the table, I can't watch this ep without thinking of the Ghost and Molly McGee ep "Innocent Until Proven Ghostly". They're just too similar (Sunnyland Productions actually did a good comparison vid about it) and TGAMM definitely had funnier jokes and a much more interesting presentation with the whole crime documentary format imo. But even without the comparison, I just felt like this ep was pretty meh in general, not being all that funny save for maybe one or two lines and just being very predictable. It just sorta seemed like an excuse plot to lead into Nick's reintroduction. Also, while I get why they'd be so sensitive (Nancy cause the cake meant a lot to her personally and Bill because, well, he just loves sweets), I felt like Nancy and Bill were just a bit too mean in this ep. Overall, this ep just wasn't very fun, and that's the most important thing I look for in BCG

So yeah, as I said, a good overall start! ^v^ My only real critique is that a couple eps could've been a bit funnier or more interesting and that we need more Remy and Vasquez (hopefully we get a couple eps focused on them later in the season). Other than that, I'm pretty satisfied and looking forward to more!

[jadelotusflower]

Yay! I’ve been looking forward to your yellow colour analysis for Lois in Smallville!! I definitely agree that Lois being in yellow, most of the time, was done very deliberately. Once I stated paying close attention to the colours I realized that way more thought was put into Lois’ clothes than I’d been aware of before. And yeah when you pay attention the abundance of yellow props, background colours and lighting really stands out too.

Another reason I think the yellow was very deliberate is the fact that yellow isn’t used as the main or only colour in clothing all that often. Which means the costume department were deliberately sourcing all those yellow things for Lois. I think there was very little “oh this is a cute top that just happens to be yellow” happening.

I too adored Lois’ collection of super cute flannel pjs!!! And given how sexualized so much of her wardrobe tended to be it was refreshing to have her be in completely non sexualized pjs most of the time. That must have been a nice break for Erica. [sidenote the overt sexualization of so many female characters, many of them teenage girls, in this period of TV is very 😬 on rewatch. Also 😬is how much I didn’t notice it at the time, when I myself was teenage girl and young women]

I was not aware that people said that Lois was “going through” the justice league because of her relationships with a Oliver and AC. Ugh, people suck.

And “sibling dynamic”? Seriously? Do those people not have siblings? I have a brother, we do not look at each other like that! And I can tell you I would NEVER give my brother a lap dance, no matter the circumstances!! Lois and Clark’s chemistry leapt off the screen from their first episode together. Even *Lana picked up on it for goodness sake. It may have taken Lois and Clark years to get together but they were obviously attracted to each other from the very start. From Chloe to Lana to Oliver pretty much everyone saw the attraction. Except for a Lois and Clark of course!

So yeah thanks for this post, looking forward to part two!!

*I do feel bad for Clana shippers sometimes, it must have sucked to have the Clois endgame shoved in their faces so much. I mean take Exposed for example. The song playing during Lois’ striptease is Don’t Cha (wish your girlfriend was hot like me?) and Clark and Lana are dating during this time! And then there is Clark’s flirty AF “aye aye solider” right at the end of the ep. Sir! You have a girlfriend!

It took a literal age, but I got it posted 😅

The use of red/yellow/blue is so present in everything once you really start looking. I think Clark wears a yellow tshirt once or twice in the first few seasons, Martha wears yellow occasionally, and so some other characters but they definitely leaned into it for Lois, which I love.

Lois is often sexualised in a way that is often uncomfortable, there’s a difference between ‘this character likes feeling sexy and owns her sexuality’ which I think does apply to Lois, but then there’s the times that they just stick her the sexy lamp territory for the drool factor which is painfully 00’s. Which is why I do like that Lois does have her ‘standard’ clothes of shirt jeans jacket rather than all glam all the time (and the pjs! so cute!)

Fandom’s gonna fandom, but there was some really toxic stuff back in the day about Lois; that she wasn’t the ‘iconic Lois’, that she should have died and Chloe taken her name because she was more Lois-like (lol, no), that she and Clark had no chemistry/were like siblings (again, lol), slut shaming her for relationships, etc. I’m glad that doesn’t seem to be as prevalent in the fandom today.

Thanks for the message anon, I always love talking Smallville!

[magnetarmadda]

Hi there! Like probably a lot of people, I'm quite jealous and in awe of the amount of reading you seem to get done. If you don't mind my asking, did you read this many books when you were in grad school? I'm in the last few months of my PhD (in paleontology!) and I've found that working on my thesis has absolutely killed my ability to get through books. Did this happen to you? Did your brain recover afterward? Or did you never deal with the reading slump?

Thanks! (And I hope you're having a good day, because you seem like a cool and nice person!)

Hey, hi! First, best of luck with your final months of grad school!!! Honestly, for me, they were so hard because of the lack of structure. Just, “finish your dissertation” and that was all the instruction really. If you ever wanna chat/vent about that, lemme know!! (Also paleontology!!! That’s so cool!!)

I always like to preface my reading habits with this: I have a very fast reading comprehension speed, and so for me, it averages out to about 100 pages of a novel in an hour and about 75 pages of nonfiction in an hour. In that way, I got lucky with the combination of early reading education, at-home book discussions, and genetics. So I can sit down and read a 300-page book in one evening, which meant that, even though I was only reading only one or two days a week, I was still getting through 50+ a year that way in grad school

I also listen to a lot of audiobooks and love trade paperbacks of graphic novels. The graphic novels can be quite fast reads for me, and this again is partly luck and genetics—my mom’s an artist, so I learned to look at images critically quite young, and can frequently find important info in them quickly. Then, for audiobooks, I do struggle with some chronic illnesses and chronic pain, and I frequently have to check out of life—but I cannot be left alone in my own head, or I rapidly catastrophize lol. I also can’t shut my own brain off when it’s time to sleep, so I listen to audiobooks then as well. I’d say this means I average about 4 audiobooks a month, where they’re usually between 8 and 14 hours (I do listen at 1.25 or 1.5 speed, because otherwise my brain stops paying attention)

I was also lucky with my advisor in grad school. She had a firm self-care policy, in that she cares more about her students’ well-being and health than timely progress. So I never felt like I was stealing moments or neglecting my work—I was trying to cultivate the healthiest version of myself, given all the other factors outside of my control. In the six years I worked with her, we actually spent more than one meeting talking about fantasy novels instead of research, which was lovely

But, yeah, there were a lot of reading struggles in grad school for me. I would go long stretches of time where the idea of opening a book and reading more words was unbearable, because god, didn’t I just spend all day reading and writing?? I also started to not care as much for the types of books I read before grad school, so now I’ve got a few stacks of books on hand I feel guilty that I haven’t read (but I’m trying to recognize that I’ll probably never read them, because tastes can change). So I might've had motivation to read, but nothing I had on hand sounded particularly good

Submitting that dissertation and knowing the hard part was over was actually the biggest relief, I think maybe of my life. I defended in mid-October and then submitted the finished manuscript about two weeks later, and then I spent a solid month just…reading whatever the fuck I wanted to lol. I have a postdoc now (and am applying for faculty jobs 🤞), and the responsibilities are waaaaaay less than as a grad student. In fact, my PI is adamant that I should not do more than 40 hrs a week, and so I’ve been able to plow through books like wild in the last few months

I also want to say: grad school is hard. It’s so absolutely difficult. Master’s programs are rough, and PhD programs are their own rodeo, and it sucks to say (because it sounds awful to most people, I know), but unless someone goes through grad school themselves, it’s hard to fathom what makes it so hard and exhausting. It’s totally okay to cut yourself some slack for finding you don’t have as much energy for other things, even the things you really enjoy. The books will be there waiting, and I'll admit it took me a solid 4 years to accept that myself lol

Thanks for the lovely ask, and I really do wish you well as you finish up 💜 again, I'm here--ask box or dm--if you'd like to take more about any part of the process 💜

[meeda]

alright I finished a court of thorns and roses, it was really beautifully written and allowed my imagination to flourish and I got lost in the fictional world. I adored the character arcs, particularly of the sisters, and I enjoyed experiencing this story through the lens of the main character. Idk what else to say about it, it was a fun and solid listen. I liked it enough to want to read the next books in the trilogy but I kind of want to save my remaining credit for another title.

I also started listening to Fallen by Lauren Kate, I actually finished this book already (the physical copy) several years ago but it never stuck, and listening to the audiobook I can see why. Maybe I just set myself up for disappointment bc I read thorns and roses before this one but this book is so boring. The first several chapters have almost nothing going on and I can barely visualize anything happening. I don’t even know what the mc’s love interests look like because I feel like the author described them once and then never did it again. Also the mc’s friend Arianne or how ever you spell it is annoying and is given way too much dialogue and focus, Penny is annoying too but for different reasons. Fuck man I actually think every character in this story is annoying even the mc sometimes. Makes the dialogue scenes a pain to sit through.

From what I remember of this story though, it gets better after the first half, and the non-spoiler reviews seem to agree. It shouldn’t have to take that long for the story to pick up, but sunk cost says I’ve made it this far already I might as well finish this book.

It’s been a long time since I read fictional books, it feels good to get back into it. I forget how enriching it can be to get lost reading/listening to a good book that allows your imagination to run free.

[fahrni]

Stream for Mac: Work Note, Menus and More

Yesterday was the second day this week I managed to work on Stream for Mac.

Some things are starting to gel but as is typical I figure something out and run head long into the next thing I need to figure out. It’s all good stuff though! I’m definitely not complaining as I’m learning a lot and at least I should have a solid — very basic — understanding about the assembly of a Mac App when I’m done with this release.

Yesterday I managed to get the File Menu items hooked up and I did a very basic implementation of Import Subscriptions which allows you to import an OPML file of all of your feeds. For the first test the file name was hard wired to a file in the Downloads folder. There was my first challenge. I had to learn a little bit about the sandbox and setup the app to allow for read only access to Downloads, then ask the user for permission to access it. Once that worked I was able to start the import process by stubbing out some of my protocols used by the process and just allowing it to run in the background. It ran to completion and I was able to add an additional 206 feeds to my list. It’s a great way to populate the app!

Next Task

I’m trying to instantiate a class early on in the AppDelegate and I want to pass it down through all the various layers ultimately to the Feed View Controller. That’s where I got stuck once again. That’s ok. I’m learning and I may be doing it wrong. Right now the data I’d like to instantiate at startup is instantiated in the Feed View Controller. The reason I’d like to get it in the App Delegate is I’d like access to it when a menu item is selected. Maybe this is just flat out the wrong way to look at it? I don’t know yet, I’m still trying to decide what’s best.

First off I’m using Storyboards, which is the way the project was created in 2021 when I made the target. So, given that I’d like to programmatically load the WindowController, Window, and finally ViewController myself so I can pass this data all the way down to the ViewController. On iOS it’s a very straight forward process. Load the ViewController and specify the init method you’d like to use and provide parameters. Done, easy.

On the Mac there are two extra layers to go through which has me questioning my whole reason for existence. It seems really dumb to pass through two extra layers just to get to the ViewController. Perhaps I do need to rethink my entire existence? Perhaps I just need to rethink the structure of my existing classes to better accommodate the Mac?

Why, Rob, Why?

I’m doing this because the thing that kicks off the refresh process also takes an instance of a protocol that’s used to update progress of the refresh. It’s what drives the progress indicator you see in the navigation bar of the iOS app.

When someone selects the Refresh menu item it’s handled in the App Delegate. That is removed from the UI where the update needs to happen by two layers; Window Controller and Window.

On iOS the UI interaction is handled by the View Controller which kicks the process off right at that layer and provides an implementation of the progress protocol I’ve defined so the UI updates properly. If I didn’t want to update the UI the way I do it would be much easier. 😃 Perhaps the Mac App should do something different, like display a spinner and disable the refresh buttons and menu item until the process is complete?

Anyway. This is leading me to rethink a lot of my iOS strategies from years and years gone by to better suit the Mac and iOS platforms.

These notes are also really good for me. They help me think through the process as I’m typing and also lead me to say “Rob, you’re doing it wrong” a lot, which is also helpful to my learning process.

Overall I’ve had frustrating moments and really great ah-ha moments and I must say that the Mac and iOS communities have been so supportive of me and my stupid questions.

The Core Intuition Slack has been amazing! Thanks y’all, you know who you are! 🙏🏼

[dallasewing]

Weeks 1-2 Post

Hello everybody! How've you been? 

It's been a few weeks since we last spoke, so I wanted to provide a bit of an update on my progress over the last two weeks, and then start to look forward onto the next two! 

So... it's been busy! I wasn't entirely prepared for just how much I've given myself to do. Week 1 went slow and was really tough. It took me some time to understand exactly how I wanted to work and then apply this to my workflow for the future weeks. With that in mind, I'll explain exactly how I'm working these weeks and how you'll have info and guidance delivered to you:  

The biggest, most time-consuming part of this whole process is researching and taking notes on my findings. I'm only using trustworthy, reliable sources for my information, so I know that I'm (and therefore you are) getting only the best, most up-to-date knowledge from the industry. I'm taking these notes in an app called Obsidian, where I'm using project folders to separate each section of this 'course'. 

Once I've gathered the necessary resources for that week's tasks, I'm then looking at applying this knowledge to the practical goals for that week. These goals are defined in the "What have I got to do?" section of my Weekly Plan document, which I am providing an updated copy of in each bi-weekly post.  

With these practical goals in mind, I'll create action notes on what I've done during the week for that specific section, and provide evidence of this, which will be found in a section-specific folder that I'll provide a link to at the bottom of each post.  

I'll format both the action notes and research notes into a word document, that I'll also place into section-specific folders containing both of these; from now they'll be referred to as 'handouts'. Each week will contain 2 handouts for each section, a Notes Summary handout, and an Action List handout. Notes Summaries will contain all of the information that I've researched through the week, as well as links to a resources folder, where all of the information sources I've used can be found.  

Okay, now you understand how this will work!  

How did these weeks go? Well, I managed to make some great progress on my drum and guitar recording techniques. I learned new ways to record individual drums that allow for you to compliment the natural sounds of the kit, and looked at what methods and microphones are needed for individual drums, as well as how to create specific tones. I've explored how to mic up an amp effectively, exploring which mics are ideal for certain purposes, as well as the different factors of a guitar's setup that can lead to creating desired sounds. All of these will be incredibly useful for a career as a producer, live sound engineer or a studio engineer.  

I’ve used the drum stems I recorded with those new techniques as resources for my mixing in these two weeks, successfully understanding how to apply compression and a noise gate to drum stems, and I now have a solid grasp of drum positions within a stereo field and their respective volumes; drum balancing! 

I've managed to practice and improve my understanding of both drum rudiments and bass techniques, both for fretting and for 'playing' (picking-hand techniques). In a realistic scenario, I'd prefer to have more time to dedicate to learning these individual skills, however I feel a week was long enough to put some solid research together and give myself time to practice and study these concepts, grasping the main goals and reasons behind their use and popularity.  

Moving forwards from here, I'll be looking into recording FX pedals and bass guitar, the essential techniques and info necessary for these, as well as how to create some desired tones with recording techniques alone. I'm also looking at using EQ in a mix, applying this to drum and guitar stems, as well as exploring some ear training techniques so that I can identify frequencies by ear better. Also, I'm exploring how to balance a guitar and bass mix, similar to what I did with the drums in week 2, using the stems recorded within the Recording Techniques section. Finally, I'll be developing a daily practice routine for the piano that I can apply in my free time that will target the skills and areas key to making a successful pianist, and then I'll also look into how to use a tambourine to create certain percussive 'ad-libs' within a track.  

Oh, yeah - one last thing: I've made the decision to omit the Songwriting section from Next Level, which has been something I didn't want to do, but found necessary. I found that during Weeks 1 and 2, I was making minimal progress on anything planned within the Songwriting section, and it was distracting and delaying me from making better progress in the other three sections. What does this mean for you folks? Well, you won't have any updates on Songwriting from me. By all means, you can continue to follow my plan and use the planned goals and ideas as starting points for your own projects, but just be aware that you won't get any further guidance from Next Level. Ultimately, I feel that the Recording Techniques, Mixing and Mastering, and Instrumental Techniques all fit into each other and share knowledge, resources and weekly requirements, and then the Songwriting section struggles to fit into that group.  

I hope you'll all have a great next few weeks!

See you there, Slick. 

Caleb 

PS: Here are all the folder links for each section! 

PPS: Here is the link to the newest revision of the Weekly Plan! 

Week 1 

- Recording Techniques 

- Mixing & Mastering 

- Instrumental Techniques 

Week 2 

- Recording Techniques 

- Mixing & Mastering 

- Instrumental Techniques 

[keefwho]

July 24 - 2023 Monday

10:43 PM

Today I felt very bleh, like my head was empty. Might be due to the missed sleep the past couple days so I’ll be sure to get to bed on time tonight for real. 

For breakfast I had half a totino’s pizza, a pear cup, and a couple oreos. I spent my brief free time playing Neopets games. 

The stream went okay. My warmup kinda sucked because I’m trying to figure out a way to do sketches on my sketch sheet then finish those on a new canvas while still retaining the feeling that everything is real loose. For a little bit I was just finishing them as low res thumbnails on the sketch sheet itself but the point of the sheet is to be a collection of incomplete and experimental things. Having completed drawing in it does not sit right with me but taking a sketch and moving it to a new canvas makes it feel more important than it is. The point is to make a little doodle that turned out good enough to post, not a pre-planned successful kind of drawing. Im sure I’ll figure something out. I feel there is a lot I need to improve on with my process and how exactly I color including the actual brush settings. There will be lots of experimenting in my future. Also on stream we finally got to watch more episodes of Rugrats because we watched the movie that ties seasons together this weekend in Discord. We also watching Courage and I’m thinking we will watch 1 episode of each show a day. I only did half commission time today and spent a little more time finishing an emote commission I had. 

After stream I did my workout in it’s entirety despite how physically tired I felt. I really had to push through this one but that’s kind of the point isn’t it. I meant to clean up first but I forgot so I cleaned up after my shower. In the shower I was about to ask my friend straight up if I had permission to think about them while I took care of myself but I decided to do it to something else intentionally. I’ve briefly brought this up to them before. I think it’s given that sometimes we jerk off to each other without the other knowing. However I know how she feels about being sexualized and sometimes I can’t help but wonder if she would actually appreciate me thinking about her like that on my own time sometimes. It bothers me enough that I do think it would good to ask permission beforehand or have a brief discussion about it. This might be weird of me but I’m just listening to how I feel. I respect her tremendously and want to exercise expressing that. 

For lunch I was excited to make a hearty helping of Rice a Roni with lentils, meatballs, broccoli, green beans, and onions. It turned out okay as usual but I was hoping it came out better. It was still a solid meal. I invested more time into Neopets while it cooked. I’m enjoying some of the minigames. 

I feel I did a poor job on today’s request. The whole time I was thinking about how I want to make something I can be proud of but it just wasn’t coming together. It came out okayish but I wanted to do better. Next I spent an hour working on a TOTK pic of my otter and my friend’s sona. I mostly tidied up the sketch and then completely lined it, taking extra care to do a good job so thats why it took so long. After that work was officially over but I wanted to do more so I briefly setup the new horse avatar I got so I can start turning it into my most recent horse sona. 

I spent time in my friend’s server where there was a lot of negative talk about one of my other friends about his overly sexual behavior. I felt sort of bad because it was more or less shit talking them behind their back and I was just going along with it. Usually if I talk about him with others, its coming from a place of at least mild affection. Some of this was just mean though. 

Tonight I watched my friend give me a sort of rundown of the Neopets website and some of it’s history, I liked listening to her about it. I love hearing her be passionate about anything. After that we hopped on Pony Town for a tiny bit and looked at characters people made before checking out my little house and giving each other horse kisses. I started dinner while she headed up to bed and we chatted a bit. 

Today I wasn’t proud of much. Just the usual amount of proud for doing things to the best of my ability. I did well on my workout especially, and doing that little bit of extra avatar work. 

For some reason my self perspective was very lacking today. I kinda just wasn’t there, at least not in a great capacity. Looking back there were moments that would have benefitted me being more involved in the present. Spending time with anyone is a good example because it only becomes truly meaningful if I am offering my full attention and appreciation. Tomorrow will be another day to exercise my awareness and put it to good use.