#I was so scared that I'd die alone that I had looped right back around to accepting it

[bitemeilovewaffles]

I now have a perfect set in my partners. Two boyfriends, two girlfriends.

I am unmatched in my autistic swag for pulling all these absolutely STUNNING people.

[imaginingmanyfandoms]

Paul's Lullaby | part one

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"Sam?" Paul was, he was in pain. He respect Sam and Emily's privacy, but he needed to talk to Sam now.

Paul wasn't angry, he was in pain. He felt like the world had opened up and swallowed him whole. He ruined his own life, and he didn't know where else to turn.

"Paul?" Sam asked, opening the door. Emily was behind him, face covered in concern.

"I imprinted tonight," Paul said, "but she hates me. She really, really hates me."

"I'm sure it's nothing you can't fix," Sam said, ushering Emily to come closer.

"Sam, I'm not exaggerating, she told me that she hates me. In fact, she should hate me." Paul looked at his feet, but only to try and hide the distress on his face. "If anyone treated her that way I used to, I'd rip them apart."

"Paul," Emily said, reaching out. Paul flinched back.

"I don't deserve your sympathy. I just, I don't know what to do."

"Be patient. Maybe you just have to prove you're a different man now," Emily offered a sad smile, but it was the exact thing Paul didn't want. He shouldn't pitied, he didn't deserve it. He could feel his heart bruise and falter. He broke his own heart and has no clue on how to fix it.

Emily had to go back to sleep, but Sam sat up with Paul for a while longer.

When Paul finally left, it was almost two in the morning. He took off running through the woods, shifting when he knew he was hidden by the tree line. He tried to outrun the heartbreak, but obviously it didn't work.

You were sitting at your desk, staring at your computer. You wanted to work on your writing, but you were so angry at the audacity that Paul had.

You had done everything you could to avoid him the last couple years - and you managed to make it to the first day of summer after graduation. You'd run into him on the beach.

He was just such a jerk, acting like his words had no effect on anyone. Like he could just laugh behind your back and it wouldn't hurt.

But he used to tell people nasty rumours about you. Until nobody really wanted you around them. And then he had to take it that much farther, when you were both fifteen, he took you on a date, acted like he'd changed and grown. And right before he kissed you he said, "I know you fall for it."

That date alone triggered years of trust issues. You'd felt alone ever since.

Back to the beach, he was blocking the trail you needed to head down to get to work on time. You'd hoped that putting your head down and just trying to slide passed would work, but he recognized you. He tried talking to you, but you ignored him.

After taking a couple steps down the path he said, "don't be like that."

This made you look up, astounded that he would even say something like that. Until you finally looked into his eyes, and you recognized how beautiful he was. He also looked stunned, like he'd run into a glass door. He reached out to you, but recoiled, dodging his touch like he was on fire. Somehow, you'd felt even lonelier than ever.

One look at his face and you felt like you were missing something. You tried to keep your cool but you just couldn't. Tears brimmed at your eyes, and his friend Jared Cameron coughed, before walking to the water just to give you two some space.

"Y/N," he said, his voice low and hesitant. Making you panic, thinking he was toying with you again.

"Stay away from me," you warned, taking a defensive step back.

That hit Paul harder in the heart than you would ever know. His soulmate, his imprint, recoiling away from him defensively. He found the person he was supposed to protect, to be needed by, and you couldn't stand the sight of him.

"Just wait a second," he begged, not moving towards you again. He didn't want to scare you.

"I hate you," you whispered, and then louder said it again. And louder again. Until you had screamed it, and the tears had taken over your cheeks. Every time you said it was an arrow to Paul's heart. He nodded, and let you turn around to run off without another word.

You didn't notice him run into the woods, followed by his friend.

You called work saying you had a personal emergency, and then went back home for the night.

Back in the present, you were tearing up at the memory of it. You were sick, you think. Addicted to red flag behaviour because there was no way you were thinking of Paul's hurt face, and feeling bad for causing it. He should feel bad for all the pain he caused.

You looked at the clock, it was almost three in the morning, but you were too caught up in all your feelings to send yourself to bed. You walked to the window, and noticed some kind of animal by the tree line. You lived in the middle of the woods, in an old cabin your grandma used to live in. You moved in when she got sick but never moved out. You liked it. It was cozy. It was private.

Finally relenting, you crawl into bed and did your best to sleep.

The next day, you were walking along the same path on the beach. You offered to cover the shift of the girl who had covered yours at such last minute.

Paul was in the same spot, but alone this time. You tried to walk passed him without acknowledging him, but something stopped you. You didn't want to see him sad again, it hurt you. And it made no sense why, you'd spent two years hating him.

You were only a few steps passed him, so you turned around, gripping the end of your sweater sleeves in each hand.

Paul had his head down, but looked up when he heard you sigh. You were standing in front of him, looking so terrified to speak to him. Paul could've started crying.

"I'm sorry about yelling at you like that yesterday," you said. "I should've just walked away so... sorry."

"Don't be sorry," he said, a flash of excitement crossed his eyes, and you mistook it for something sinister. You tried to remain calm, but you were feeling lightheaded. You just couldn't trust his motives. "I deserved it."

Now that, threw you for a bit of a loop.

Fool me once, you thought.

"I still think we should just keep our distance," you said. "You kind of broke my heart."

"I'm really sorry about that, I was trying to impress the seniors. I was a tool. An idiot."

"Finally we agree on something," you said. He looked at you, and you both let out a small smile. He pushed some sand with his foot. His bashfulness made you want to believe him. "I work just up the hill. You can walk me if you want."

"Can I walk you home when you're done?" he asked, quickly falling in perfect tandem with you.

"No," you said. "But you can walk with me right now."

"I'll take it," he said.

"Why do you want to talk to me anyway? I thought you hated me," you said.

"I could never hate you," he said. "I do hate how I treated you though. Not my finest hour."

"I think your finest hour remains to be seen."

Paul stayed quiet after that. And you were oddly comfortable in the silence. You're not even sure why you invited him to come along, but some sick part of you wanted him to. You wanted to reach out and touch him. His arms just looked so welcoming, and the way he stretched his hand open and shut made you think he wanted the same thing. But you couldn't let him in, not after one day.

"Have a good shift," he said, putting his hands in his pocket.

You smiled at him ,and thanked him for walking you. When you smiled, he smiled. And you caught onto that.

Paul had been standing in the same spot every day to walk you to work. Out of curiosity, on one of your days off, you snuck close to the spot to see if he was there. And he was, leaning against the same railing, in the same spot that he waited for you everyday.

You got comfortable in a cozy little spot in the trees. You wanted to see how long he waited for you. You dozed off before you could get your question answered.

You woke up hours later, when the sun was already setting. You hated walking through the trees in the dark. You started walking on your own, but you had a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach. So you swallowed your pride and called someone you knew would answer.

Paul was sitting at Sam and Emily's table, enjoying the dinner she made while waiting for his turn to go on patrol. It was Jared and Quil out there now. Paul could hear Seth snoring on the couch, making him laugh. Things that used to annoy him, didn't really seem to annoy him anymore. Not since you started letting him walk you to work. He even got Sam to let him change his patrol times to make sure he could be there every day.

His phone rang, and with a mouthful of food checked the number. He almost chocked on his food when he saw your number. He answered, hitting his chest to dislodge the food.

"Y/N, hi," he said, big grin on his face as he stood up and walked outside. Behind his back, Emily and Sam shared a knowing look, and he leaned in to kiss his wife.

Paul noticed Jared sitting nearby with Kim, and didn't think too much of it with you on the line.

"This may sound stupid," you said, "but can you walk me home? I don't like to go in the dark."

"You never let me walk you home," he said.

"If this is a bad time, it's okay," you said, disappointment clear in your voice.

"No, no... where are you? I'll be right there." He stepped back inside the house to grab his shoes, but the sound of you gasping stalled his movements.

"I'm by our meeting spot," you said. His grin returned when you called it that. "It's so dumb, I wanted to see if you went there when I didn't work and fell asleep."

"You were spying on me?" he asked. You were silent on the other end and he laughed. "I'll be right there."

"Who are you?" you asked.

"Huh?"

He heard you scream, as did Sam and Emily who's cheeky glances turned to concern quickly. "Y/N?" he asked, panicked. He was already running outside, Sam on his heals.

"Jared!" Sam shouted, "Why aren't you on patrol?"

"Seth said he'd do it!" Jared yelled back. Paul dropped his phone, and shifted, running top speeds to where you said you were.

Never in his whole life had he been this scared. He could hear Jared apologizing for the mixup in his thoughts, but Paul didn't really care what he had to say. If you were hurt, Paul would die. Paul would simply die.

He needed you to be there safe.

I knew something was wrong, Embry thought. Paul didn't even see him show up. Sorry I didn't act on it.

Shut the shit up and run, dammit!

When he got to the meeting point, you were gone, but your bag was abandoned nearby. Paul sniffed it, getting your current scent memorized. He took off when he found the trail. He also smelled a retched, filthy bloodsucker. It wasn't one of the Cullens. No, this was different. And it started at the water, that's how it got passed their lines. Not that they had enough people around.

Paul howled, the pain in it was evident for anyone around. It was him saying get here, or suffer the consequences.

I don't smell their blood, Jared thought.

You don't get to talk about them. This anger didn't derive from a bad temper, it was fear. It was just fear talking.

Paul kept running, catching a fork in the scent trails. One way was Quil, Leah and the bloodsucker. And the other was you, all alone. Alone but alive. If he couldn't hear Leah or Quil think, that was a good sign. Meant that they'd changed back, and Leah would never do that unless she killed them.

Go to her, we'll find Leah. Sam nodded at Paul.

You were crying as you ran, clumsy feet stumbling over tree roots and your own blurred vision totally betrayed you. Someone had come out of the water, eyes red like rubies. And they were so pretty that you just had to look at her. Until the showed her teeth, forcing you to flee in fear. She was faster than you, but you think she was playing with you.

And then if that wasn't scary enough, when she was jumping down from a tree to kill you, a wolf jumped from the shadows and grabbed the woman. And it was her turn to flee. Another wolf jumped out, and you were sure you were a goner.

But it just chased after the other two. Leaving you alone and confused.

You stumbled back to your feet, running as fast as you could towards your cabin. You would be safe in there. Maybe. It was the best you could do right now.

You cried harder when you thought you heard more rustling in the trees. You were at your door, struggling to get your keys out and unlock the door. When you did, you slammed it shut and locked it behind you. You dove over the sofa and kept your eyes on the door, as if that's all it took to keep you safe.

Your phone was lost somewhere in the woods, but you could still hear them. Out there. Maybe it wasn't real.

There was a feverish knocking on your door, and you couldn't peel yourself away from the couch.

"Y/N! Are you in there," Paul shouted. Oh my God, thank everything, it's Paul.

"Paul, I'm coming," you struggled, fighting through your tears to answer. It killed him, but he was so happy you were okay.

You opened the door, and cried even harder when you saw his face. You couldn't hate him now, now when he came running for you. He ignored his usual boundaries and pulled you in for a hug. He was so warm wrapped around you. Your arms were still tucked into your chest. And his totally encompassed you.

"Just breath, honey," he said, rubbing his hand up and down your back. You tried to take his advice, but you couldn't focus.

"You came for me."

"I always will, you can always call me. I will always come running," he said. And you believed him.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" you asked, pushing yourself away from him enough to look up at his face. His features were uncharacteristically soft as they looked down at you.

"Of course," he said. He kissed your forehead, and you felt the instinct of pushing him away - but you ignored it this time.

"On the couch," you said.

"Sure, honey." He brushed his hands up and down your biceps, helping you take a few deep breaths. "I'm not going anywhere, don't worry."

"I don't understand what happened," you said, pushing yourself away from him. "She came out of the water, and then she..."

"It's okay," he cooed, "you don't have to say anything."

"And this doesn't change anything," you said. "I trust you with some things but not other things."

"Some things?" he asked, more amused than anything.

"I trust you with my life, not my heart."

"We'll work on it," he said, pulling you in close for another hug.

"Yeah," you agreed. "We'll work on it."

[requested] [part 2?]

I kind of love this?

[cherrypieships]

the amusement park: chapter two

A/N: whew omg it’s been a while since I posted! Anyway I’m back and better than ever with part two, the finale of the amusement park!! This chapter includes a trigger warning for fake blood and cult mentions. It's a haunted house, so it isn't a real cult, but I'd rather be safe than sorry <3

Ship: davey jacobs x pepper simmons (s/i), featuring my best friend V and my gf Khourey and their respective f/os, race higgins and jack kelly!

Summary: When the sun sets on Canobie Lake park, the amusement park turns into a Halloween extravaganza, where Pepper and Davey find themselves paired up once more.

Once the sun had dipped onto the horizon, the last dregs of color fading from the sky as the stars came out, the group found themselves heading towards the sides of the park, where the haunted houses were set up. Mickey looped their arm through Pepper’s, pulling her close and pointing out the performers walking past; a clown with a chainsaw, a long-haired girl in a tattered hospital gown, a man wearing a pig’s head as a mask.

“So they basically walk around the park and try to scare people.” She explained, and nudged V so they could listen in as well. “But little kids sometimes wear these little glow-y ball necklaces, see? And the performers can’t scare them.” She pointed out a pair of kids walking past, both of their t-shirts illuminated by spiked plastic spheres attached to long black cords. Sure enough, the actors walked right past them.

Vi pushed their bottom lip out, turning towards Mickey. “That’s so fucking cute.” They cried.

Pepper smiled. It was pretty cute, and a good idea on the park’s part. “Do they wear them into the houses?” She asked curiously.

“I fuckin’ hope not.” Jack scoffed. “I wanna get scared, I’m not here to miss a good haunted house cause of some kid.” He smiled when Mickey swatted him. “What? It’s true!”

Mickey’s eyes rolled. “Yeah, but don’t be a dick about it.” They chastised, going to swat him again, and as their hand made contact, Jack snatched it and brought her fingers to his lips for a kiss.

Averting her gaze, Pepper felt something cold swirl in the pit of her stomach at the casual intimacy. She focused on the gum wrapper on the ground beside her shoe instead of whatever that feeling was.

V’s knuckles rapped against Pepper’s forearm, a gentle knock for her attention. “Hey, I gotta hit the bathroom, you wanna be my buddy?” They asked, though the raise of their eyebrows gave the impression that the question was simply a formality; there was no option.

Making the journey to the restrooms a short one, Vi didn’t even pretend they had to pee, instead moving to stand in front of the mirror and check their eyeliner. “So are you gonna make a move tonight?” They asked, voice quieter than usual.

Pepper sighed, of course this was the reason she was in here. “Dude, I don’t fuckin’ know.” She said, exasperation travelling across her features at even the thought of confessing her feelings. She’d talked a big game about it before, about how she loved Davey, about how she’d confess her feelings for him the second she got the idea he liked her back, but truthfully she was… well, she was scared.

Vi barely looked up from the mirror, but their expression softened. “Obviously you don’t have to,” they reassured. “But I bet that if you don’t at least ask how he feels he’ll never tell.”

Pepper rolled her eyes. “That’s because there’s-“

The door to the bathroom flew open and Mickey blustered inside, annoyance clear on their face. “Okay, how dare you two leave me alone with those idiots.”

V grimaced. “Oh shit, sorry. I just wanted a minute to see what was up with Pepper and Davey.”

Mickey’s lips pursed, eyebrows raising onto her forehead. “Oh shit okay what’s the deal?” They asked, moving closer.

Against her better judgement, Pepper leaned her head against the bathroom wall. “There’s nothing to tell! I don’t have any plans to tell him, and there’s no way someone who talks as much as Davey would have a crush on someone and not say something.” She looked pointedly at her best friends.

“That… is an excellent point.” Mickey acquiesced.

Vi lifted a finger. “Or! Maybe that’s the way you can tell that he does like you.” They moved toward the sink to wash the eyeliner remnants from under their fingernails.

“What?”

Mickey nodded. “Oh, no, I totally get it.”

“Get what? What are you talking about?”

V smiled, turning to put their damp hands on Pepper’s shoulders. “You just said Davey never shuts up.” Pepper nodded slowly. “He’ll talk to you about anything, right?” Another nod.

“But he never talks about what’s up between the two of you.” Mickey finished. “Literally, even if Jack asks, he brushes him off.”

Brow furrowed, Pepper turned back to Vi, who was grinning. “If you don’t ask, he’ll never tell.” They clarified, an echo of their earlier statement. “Don’t fucking focus on what he says, bitch, you have to ask about what he’s not saying.”

Terrifyingly, that made it click. Something welled up hot and thick in Pepper’s throat, hope or fear she couldn’t tell. Whatever it was, she wasn’t budging at her friends’ optimism. “You two are reading too far into this.” She countered weakly.

Mickey grabbed her hand, squeezed it a few times. “Listen, we’re not pressuring you.” They explained, and Violet hummed in agreement. “You don’t have to ask him anything or tell him anything, if you just wanna vibe tonight, that’s totally cool.”

Just like that, the tension melted from Pepper’s body, her psyche apparently pleased at being left alone for the moment. She looked between her friends, Vi’s warm smile and Mickey’s kind eyes, took a deep breath, and went back out into the park.

Back where the boys were waiting, the curtain to the first haunted house had lifted, and the line began to move. Jack waved them down with a smile, and they gapped into the line. He pulled the park pamphlet from his back pocket and flipped to the back, where the haunted house attractions were listed. “Okay so we started next to the big spinn-y thing. Which is… the cult one, The Culling.” He announced.

“Yeah, Jack.” Race deadpanned. “It’s on the sign.” He pointed above the line, which, sure enough, boasted the name of the site.

Jack swatted his friend with the pamphlet before tucking it into his back pocket. “I knew that.” He grinned, throwing an arm around Mickey’s shoulders and pulling them closer.

Davey nudged Pepper’s side. “Partners?” He smiled, offering his elbow as their group stepped up to the banister blocking off the entryway.

She ignored the wink that Vi threw at her, and looped her arm through Davey’s with a blush and a simper. “Hope we don’t die in there.” She mused.

He patted the hand she’d placed on his bicep, warm in contrast to her poorly-circulated own ones. “If we do, we’ll die doing what we loved.”

Her head tilted. “What’s that?”

“Kicking and screaming.”

Pepper crumpled into a fit of laughs as the employee lifted the bannister. “Have fun.” The woman at the entryway smiled, her eyebrows raising mischievously.

Race and V went first, obviously, Race throwing his arm across their shoulders and pulling them close. Mickey and Jack went next, Jack’s hand curled protectively into the back of her shirt as they ducked through the curtain. A billow of dry-ice smoke kicked out at her and Davey as she gripped his arm tighter, moving through the curtain and into a room flooded with red light.

There was a man in the corner, a pair of bloodied goat horns protruding from his head, who growled lowly at them as they walked past. Davey cast a look in his direction, following in the footsteps of his friends, and they heard Race scream further up ahead. Pepper laughed a little at that, the adrenaline beginning to swirl hot in her veins.

The next room was full of actors, at least a dozen kneeling frozen in mock prayer, and the woman to Pepper’s right let out a broken wail, making her jump. Davey’s hand came to grab hers again, this time his fingers tangling with hers. He was laughing gently at her fright, something that might have pissed her off if it had been anyone else.

They passed through a hallway full of strobelights and white walls painted with bloody handprints, the thrum of electricity the only noise for a moment, and Pepper opened her mouth to ask when the Cult Stuff would start, when a man wearing a decaying goat’s skull for a mask barrelled around the corner, making both her and Davey scream.

She curled into his side, awkwardly stepping on his shoe as she did, and watched the man with enormous eyes as he tilted his mask curiously at them. Davey laughed a little, and whether he was trying to laugh off his fright or genuinely enjoying himself, Pepper couldn’t tell.

They rounded the corner, careful of the actor who’d popped out at them, and turned into a room seemingly devoid of anyone, except for Mickey and Jack, who were giggling as they shuffled into the next room. The walls were tall and painted white, a hidden projector playing a black and white video reminiscent of those old war propaganda commercials. It was too loud for Pepper to hear anything properly, but she could catch snippets of the voiceover, “Join us in… the great and powerful… be afraid…” as the video flicked between church services, goats on farms, hypnotic black and white spirals.

Davey tilted his head at the screen. “Christians, am I right?”

Swallowing a laugh, she jutted her elbow into his side. “This is not the time, David.” She snorted, coyly tugging him closer by the anchor his hands provided. Fuck it, why not get close to him while she had the chance?

The end was in sight, she could see the cool blue light of the outdoors pouring in from the other side of the final room; one that was lined with pews, with a goat-headed preacher at the front, holding a black leather-bound book and screaming about the end of days. The church (cult?) -goers were in various stages of worship, some with their arms in the air, some reading their scripture, some sobbing towards the sky. A shudder ran through Davey, one so intense that she felt it in her own skin, and she wondered, briefly, what was so freaky about this particular scene that he-

SLAM

The actor in the pew she’d just passed closed his book with a deafening bang. She jumped, screamed so loud it felt like the sound had been ripped from her teeth, and didn’t realize she was shaking until Davey’s arm encircled her, speeding past the latter half of the room and out of the first haunted house.

Pepper swallowed a mouthful of fresh air, held it for a few seconds, and released it with a pleased laugh. She turned her face up to Davey’s, ready to ask him if his heart was racing the way hers was, when he cut her off, gripping her shoulders like she’d disappear. “Are you okay?” He demanded.

Her eyebrows pinched together, her smile melting at the way his eyes were blown wide. “Yeah? I-I’m fine?” She said, reaching up to grip his wrists. “What’s wrong, are you okay?”

Every hint of expression faded from his face. The fire left his eyes, his hold on her softening, his jaw and browline going slack at the realization. “Yeah, I… I thought he-”

Race’s hands landed on either one of their shoulders. “Hey, Jack wants to know if you guys wanna do the hotel one or the factory one next, we’re at a tie.”

Pepper turned to him, blinking back the heat in her cheeks. “Oh fuck, okay, we’ll be right there.”

There were four more haunted houses, each of them with a bit of walking distance between them. Davey didn’t release her hand until they’d cleared the last attraction.

---

Still reeling from the adrenaline rush of the haunted houses, the group made their way toward the back of the park where the Ferris Wheel resided. Violet and Race were skipping down the lanes, their laughter fluttering in the cool autumn wind. Mickey and Jack were walking in front of them, their pinkies linked as they recounted their haunted house experiences.

Pepper tried to ignore that Davey was still so close to her.

His voice broke her out of her thoughts.

“Which one was your favorite?” He asked, the back of his hand brushing against Pepper’s as they walked. He was looking down at her, nose all rosy and cheeks flushed. He wore autumn so well.

She pursed her lips as she thought. “The cult one.” She settled after a moment.

Davey grinned. “Mine too. Or the hotel was really good.” He turned to her once they reached the line for the ferris wheel. “Y’know, when that guy back there slammed his bible closed I thought he hit you.” His fingers twitched, like he was waiting to reach for something.

There it was. The reason for his earlier freakout.

Laughing lightly, Pepper shook her head, curls falling in her face as she tried to dispel any of his remaining worry. “Oh God, no. Isn’t that illegal, anyway?” She focused on the ferris wheel ahead of them, the eighty feet of blinking lights and rocky baskets that they’d be shoved into; anything besides the bewildering look that was back on Davey’s face. Ahead of them, their friends were being ushered into passenger cars. Jack planted a kiss to the side of Mickey’s head and whispered something into their ear that made them grin.

Pepper tried not to be jealous, and failed.

Beside her, Davey was rambling again. She tuned in right in the middle of his spiel. “It’s some kinda torture house, basically. They just wail on you for like ten hours, and they film it, too. You have to sign a waiver and everything, and it’s like, forty pages or something. I watched a video of this one girl who went there and she said-”

“You two all set?” The ride operator asked, her smile bright as she cut into Davey’s rambling.

He blinked, like he hadn’t realized how close they were. “Oh, um. Yeah, I guess we are.” He resolved.

They clambered into the rocky car and belted themselves in, waited for the attendant to lock their door, and began their ascent.

Immediately, Pepper felt the wind chill. “Holy fuck, it’s freezing up here.” She barked. Davey’s cardigan was warm, sure, but the cold air cut through it like a knife.

Davey turned to her and readjusted the way he was sitting, opening up his arms. “I know, c’mere.” He wiggled his fingers and everything and, well, how was he supposed to say no to that?

She scooted closer until her leg was pressed right up against his, and her upper body curled into him. They’d done this before, a million times, when watching movies or at parties when it got crowded, or when she asked him to read to her, and Davey, ever the wonderful companion, never complained-

Oh.

Oh, no.

That was what her friends meant.

Davey’s arms wrapped around her tight. Without thinking, her arm did the same. “Better?” He asked, pulling back to look down at her.

Pepper smiled with her heart in her throat. “Always.” She said, and looked up at him.

And there he was. The same Davey as always, with his pale skin and round hazel eyes, now grinning down at her like she had hung all the stars in the sky just for him. Here he was, and he was so close that their noses were almost touching. Not correcting strangers who thought they were dating. Holding her hand and giving her his clothes and sharing drinks with her. Here he was- and she was confused.

His mouth twitched, the way it always did when he was worried. “You okay, Pep?” He asked, quieter now.

A slow nod. “Yeah… just, um, thinking.” She responded. He opened his mouth, eager to ask more, but she cut him off. “About us.” She said, feeling bold now.

Davey’s eyebrows just about skyrocketed off his face. “Us.”

“Yeah.” Pepper’s hands were shaking, but she didn’t think she could stand another minute of this. All of her affections bottled up like a powder keg while he played with them so nonchalantly. “Davey, what are we?” She hoped the question didn’t come out as raw as it felt, but she could almost taste the blood on her tongue.

“Oh.” His shoulders dropped, and he looked away. His arms didn’t move from around her, but his eyes were flicking back and forth. “We’re… you’re… m-my best friend and...” He scrunched his eyes closed and took a deep breath. “You’re my best friend and... I’m so stupidly in love with you.”

Pepper sat up as the Ferris wheel stopped. They were at the top now.

“I know that’s a lot to throw at you, I’m sorry, but all day I’ve just been thinking about you and about how much it feels like you’re this missing piece of me, you know? Like every time I need someone you’re there, and every time I talk about you to anyone I get this big grin on my face. And then earlier when that lady said what she said, it just felt so right.” He’d been gesturing wildly with his hands until she grabbed them.

She pulled his hands into her lap, encasing them with her own cold ones. “Davey.”

He sighed with a wry smile. “You can tell me no, Pep, it’s okay. You don’t owe me anything.”

“Davey.” She tried again.

“And it’s not gonna ruin anything, I promise. I love you but that’s not gonna make me turn into an asshole, I still care about you as a friend.”

“David.” She grabbed the sides of his face in her cold hands. His jaw was tense. “I love you.” She said, plainly, the way you would state any other fact. The sky was blue, the Earth was round, and Pepper Simmons loved Davey Jacobs.

And for once, Davey- sweet, lovely Davey- didn’t start talking about love, or about basic heteronormativity, or fucking haunted houses. Instead, he leaned forward and kissed her.

Any great novelist, or even just your average writer, always compared a great kiss to fireworks. But this, Pepper thought, was better than any fireworks she’d ever seen. It was coming home after a long night. It was sitting by a fire on a cold winter day. It was years of sharing beds and writing texts in secret languages, of sitting at each other’s family dinners, of shared secrets and pinkie promises, playful teasing and pathetic yearning, all wrapped up in a soft press of lip to lip. It was Davey. Of course it was. In retrospect, nobody else had ever stood a chance.

Pepper was giggling when she pulled away from his lips. “I love you.” She repeated.

The lights of the amusement park were glittering in his eyes. “And I love you.” He was beaming, their foreheads tipped together. Then he started laughing, soft and slow and bubbly, as though he were savoring it. “Oy, we’re so ridiculous.” He said as the ferris wheel began to turn again.

She could’ve stayed there for days, looking at each of the freckles on his face like little star clusters in her vision. If there were ever a photo she could keep framed on the walls of her memory, it would be this; his smile, the ivory skin around his eyes crinkled as he laughed. She was laughing too. “Yeah, we are.” Her head leaned against his shoulder, a sigh escaping before she could stop it. “How long?”

There was a beat, and she knew Davey was thinking. “Um, four years maybe? It was the summer before junior year of high school, I know that much.” The thumb of his right hand, still around her, began rubbing at her shoulder.

Pepper sat upright, aghast. “Oh my God, you’re fucking with me.”

“I’m not.” He grinned.

“Holy fuck.” She snorted. “We could’ve been doing this for years!”

Davey poked her side, making her laugh in turn. “How about you?” There was the look in his eyes again, and this time she recognized it. Dreamy, warm, a little vulnerable.

“Senior Prom. Remember we slow danced together?”

The ferris wheel stopped again, this time with them at the back. “Yeah, holy shit. I was so nervous that night.” Pepper laughed, head tossed back. “I’m serious! I was so sweaty, I’m surprised you didn’t comment on it.”

“Your hands were like holding clams.” Another poke, this one less playful. “It doesn’t matter. None of it matters. We’re here now.”

A kiss landed on her cheek, warm in stark contrast to the biting cold. “I can’t believe this.” He was laughing. “I can’t believe you liked me back.” He said.

Pepper nuzzled her nose into his neck. “I know. I can’t either.” She rested her chin on his shoulder, looked up at him and sighed.

He turned back to her. “You know they’re not gonna leave us alone, right?” He asked, tilting his chin towards the baskets below them that held their friends.

“I’m aware,” she mumbled. “I mean, they did call it.”

His lips curled up into a wry smile. “I know they did.” His fingers found the long strands of her hair, wrapped themselves in them. “Race and V haven’t left me alone about you for like, two years straight.” He shrugged. “And oh my God, if I have to hear Sarah and Les talk about it one more time I’m gonna explode.”

Pepper’s jaw dropped. “Sarah and Les were teasing you?”

He scoffed gently. “Are you kidding? They tell me to shut up every time I talk about how pretty you are.” And yeah, maybe she should have expected that, if he truly had been in love with her since junior year of high school, but Pepper’s body reacted quicker than she could recognize, her cheeks going hot and nose scrunching as a smile broke across her features.

“Well,” She said as the ferris wheel began to turn again. “Lucky for us, we probably have some time to kill before we have to face them again.” She bit at her lower lip, glancing up at him and hoping he would catch onto her proposition.

And, since Davey had always been smart, he did. “You’re right.” He breathed, and then leaned down to catch her in another kiss, one that went on, well… a little longer than the first.

Later, they had to face their friends, red-faced and smiling as they admitted what had happened. They had to endure a good hour’s worth of teasing, V and Mickey taking the opportunity to deliver a few well-intended pokes to Pepper’s sides, and Race and Jack offering high-fives to her- well, she supposed he was her boyfriend now.

The two of them climbed into the backseat of Race’s mom’s minivan again, this time hand-in-hand and sharing warm laughter. Davey stole another kiss from her, giggly and content, and promptly leaned his head on her shoulder to get some rest.

She supposed everything else could wait.

[transcredwaters]

20 for the wol meme!

"When in the story was their highest point? When were they at their lowest?"

Ohh boy.

Might well start with the highest point; I'd say probably post-ARR, right after Praetorium. What with having Thancred returned safe - something he was desperate for, cited in another entry right after the Lahabrea reveal;

"[. . . ]There was no way. I knew Thancred, and the man who laughed in our faces was not Thancred. The man who ripped off that hood and proved he was the one who betrayed us all was not Thancred. The man with the cruel grin was. Not. Thancred.

He will never be Thancred.

And by Nophica's grace, I will get him back, even if I have to die trying.

I will get him back.

It doesn't matter to me what it'll take."

Post-ARR was also, despite stock full of primal fights and it's own share of agony, probably where he felt the safest. He let his guard down, even. Like, before ARR, there was the incident that led to the loss of his older siblings, Oh'dax and Shele. in the 1.0 area of the story he was in total isolation, spent the calamity alone, and was scared. Frightened. Lonely, really.

ARR obviously had . All That leading up to Prae.

I feel it's also important to note he saw his family the most in this time period - as he starts distancing themselves from him post-dragonsong, insisting it's the only way to keep them safe. Sorry for a cut from another entry, I just thought it was cute and wanted to share- from when his father brought along his younger brother and daughter to meet up with him.;

"It feels like it has been many winters since I saw them last, and I felt I was bursting with joy when I first caught sight of them. Poppa said I ran so fast he couldn't even see me, and I barreled into Cherie'li to embrace him, before lifting Dhael into my arms.

Oh, it has been so long since I've heard her giggle so joyously. I swear my heart swelled when I heard it, and I near cried knowing she was even here. . . That I was able to hold her in my arms again."

Stuff starts going down from there, and, well, I guess that leads up to the lowest point. So. Some shb spoilers below the cut . And prepare for a verrry long ramble because I think about this often. Also putting the cut bc this post is long enough already.

If that intro to this part doesn't make it clear; 5.3-6.0 are his lowest points. He thought it was HW, right after the Vault, for a while; Zenos beating his ass brought him down some pegs. But good lord by Shadowbringers he's already ready to burst at the seams, and then just. . . Everything falls apart.

This may sound a bit messy as I'm not the best at recounting events, but weh.

Emet's a pretty big part of it all. I've rambled about it before (not here, though) about the whole Shard ordeal and how Emet would twist him around and cause him to feel like he's been thrown for an Entire Loop. And he's so fucking conflicted about it; outright stating that he doesn't know whether to embrace him as an old friend, stab him through with his lance, or just leave and never allow him to bother him anymore.

The shard thing inofitself really fucks with his head. Finding out about Amaurot, the Final Days, the truth about Hydaelyn and Zodiark. . . By the time the Hades fight crops up he's ready to give up.

And boy . After Emet dies it's just agony. O'miz never. Asked for this. He was just some silly Miqo'te boy in the lancer's guild when he first started his adventure, the last thing he expected was to be seen as some Warrior, to lose friends, so on and so forth.

And those last words.

"Remember us. Remember that we once lived."

He'll never forget that. Ever, for sure. After the fight, once he's brought G'raha to safety and presumes he's alone he collapses. And that's not even the last thing the First can throw at him !

The Exarch crystalizing is the breaking point. That's when he finally shatters. Even once they're safely back on the Source and G'raha is okay O'miz cuts his hair in a meltdown after already going out and getting his ass kicked in the same meltdown. He gets a huge scar, then. And he picks up DRK after returning to the Source. Suilosaux grows bitter, cursing him for killing Emet - his partner - and cursing him under the assumption that O'miz killed Fray. At this point Suil doesn't know that's untrue, but he's got nothing but distrust for the guy after Emet. He refuses to let Miz near Sidurgu or Rielle unless they're training, and it takes ages for him to finally warm up to Miz, to trust him, but it isn't a cure-all for his guilt.

That's a breaker, really, of it all. His guilt has ramped up so high, and he's just exhausted, he wants a break, he wants to go home or run away and never look back. He can't keep doing this, it all hurts, it's all digging into him and breaking him down and ripping him limb from limb and he's had enough of it.

He's numb by endwalker.

I don't know nearly enough to go into detail. I only know about one group who shows up, and I still can't formulate enough thoughts to be cohesive. But after it's all over, he starts working to collect himself. Hopefully by 6.1 and beyond he can start getting better again, right ?