#I think I’ll start another queue soon. I hate leaving these posts on peoples feeds. im sorry bout that

[roses-and-tears]

.

[maladaptive---daydreamer]

Fake it till you make it

You were never really one to receive post from home. Your parents would send you a letter every once in a while, sometimes a small care package towards the end of term, but they would come in black lidded boxes tied together with red silk ribbon. This was the precise reason why you were so confused when a school post owl dropped a crushed brown box in front of you and flew back to the owlery.

“What the hell is that?” Your best friend, Draco, asked, voice laced with disgust.

“I have no idea” you replied, cautiously picking the box up looking for a clue as to who the sender was.

“Well open it, don't leave us in suspense, Y/N” Daphne urged.

You ripped the brown parchment off the box to be greeted with a cake box from a bakery in Hogsmeade. You lifted the crumpled box lid off to reveal a small square carrot cake. It had been decorated with white icing, and a note had been piped on with orange icing.

“Go out with me?” Daphne read. “Oh my, you’re getting asked out! Does it say who the sender was?”

Draco looked at you suddenly interested in this delivery.

“No it doesn’t, and I’m glad it doesn't because I definitely don’t want to go out with the owner of this cake.” You replied, pushing the box away from you and returning to your breakfast.

“You don't mind if I take that do you, Y/N?” Crabbe asked, licking his lips.

“Go ahead, Crabbe.” You pushed the box towards them and both him and Goyle reached for the cake.

“Acting as though you’ve never seen a cake in your lives, you disgust me the pair of you” Draco sneered. He picked up the parchment the cake was wrapped in with two fingers and began to stare at it.

“What are you doing?” You asked, looking up from the page of the Daily Prophet you were reading

“I’m checking to see who sent it.”

“I already did that, there was no name on it.”

“You might have missed it”

“I can read, Malfoy”

“Well there doesn't seem to be a name on here, a shame really, I would have enjoyed watching you turn him down and embarrass him in front of the whole school”

“Who said I would have turned him down?”

“You did, just now,”

“I only said that because its an anonymously sent cake, it could have been poisoned for all I know. Had I known who the cake was from I would have reacted differently”

Draco looked confused for a second before getting up, announcing he was going to make his way to potions. You and Daphne did the same a few minutes later and met up with him again in the queue outside the classroom. You had potions with the Ravenclaws, which according to the sorting hat was its next choice for you, but it believed you’d be better suited in Slytherin. It meant that you managed to get along well with some of the Ravenclaw students. Before long, Slughorn called you all in and you took your usual seat at the back, taking up a four-seat bench with you, Daphne, Draco and Blaise. Today's lesson was about sleeping potions, Slughorn announced he would be pairing you up rather than you working with the person you sat alongside. He began reading off a list, pairing Daphne with your friend, Alicia, Draco with Marcus Belby and you with Terry Boot.

You reluctantly got up and moved to a station near the front of the room.

“Morning, Y/N” Terry greeted, oddly giddy for a Tuesday morning

“Morning, Terry” you replied, giving him a small smile. You read through the instructions in your textbook and began to chop up your ingredients.

“Anything interesting happen this morning?” He asked, looking up from the valerian root he was chopping.

“I did get a weird package at breakfast.”

“Oh, you did?”

“Yeah, someone tried to ask me out, bit stupid though they didn't leave their name”

“I did! it was on the inside of the lid”

“Pardon?”

“Erm yeah sorry about that. What I meant to say is that I sent it.”

“Oh, right, well” You were honestly speechless, you had maybe spoken to Terry once, apologising for Draco’s remark about his mother.

“It's just you’re so beautiful and smart, and you’re nice”

“Terry I’m flattered but I’m just not interested”

“You think I’m ugly don’t you?”

“No- I”

“Don’t lie to me Y/N”

“No I swear, it's just” Your mind raced at a million miles an hour to try and come up with a passable lie. “It's just that I’m actually going out with someone already. We just haven't told anyone, you know how-”

“Who?” He cut you off, his face twisting with anger.

“I don't see how that’s any of your business” The sheer cheek of him was enough to make you angry as well,

“Well, then you’re lying, if it were true you’d say who. You do think I’m ugly”

“It’s,” You paused, blurting out the first name that came into your mind. “Its Draco”. You were already kicking yourself for spluttering his name out. Any Slytherin boy would have done fine, but you just had to say his name.

“Oh, right. Makes sense, you two are inseparable,”

An awkward silence had fallen over you and he barely spoke another word the whole lesson. Slughorn had administered each pairs sleeping potion on a cornish pixie, the pair who managed to keep their pixie asleep for long enough was due to receive a prize the next lesson. You returned to your seat at the back and grabbed your things.

“What’s wrong with you?” Draco asked, pulling the back of your robe

“Huh? what-”

“You look ill, do you need me to walk you to the hospital wing?”

“Walk the long way with me to defence against the dark arts?”

He nodded and the two of you left, splitting off from Daphne and Blaise.

You walked in silence for a bit

“Are you going to tell me what the matter is?” He stopped and faced you for a second

“I found out who sent me the cake” You admitted, continuing to walk

“And?”

“It was Terry Boot.”

Draco started to laugh.  “You’re lying”

“I swear but this isn't even the worst part” You were beginning to explain but he wouldn't stop laughing. “Draco, I’m serious! stop laughing there's more!”

He calmed down after a few seconds and you continued.

“I tried rejecting him nicely, but he just didn't take it. So I lied and told him I’m going out with someone”

“Oh? whos the unlucky bugger?”

You slapped his arm. “It's you”

“Me?” He looked genuinely shocked.

“I’m sorry it was the first name that came into my mind. But I just wanted to give you a heads up because he’ll probably tell his friends and the whole school will probably find out! Ugh I’m sorry Draco”

“Sorry for what?”

“Well that everyone’s going to think we're together”

“They could think of worse things, Y/N. Plus I don't care what they have to say about me,”

“you're not angry?”

“Of course not, people thought we were going out anyway.”

“Thank you, Draco, seriously”

“You know, we might as well make it believable, just until he moves on, something tells me Boot isn't going to let this drop.”

“What do you mean believable?”

“Like act like we’re a couple. Hold hands, you know all of that”

“But what about all your admirers”

“I could care less about them, your happiness and safety matters more than the opinions of the mediocre witches and wizards in this school”

You felt your heart swell a bit, you honestly didn't expect Draco to prioritise you like this. “So we should just fake it until he gets a girlfriend?”

“Exactly, just follow my lead”

You two ended up being a minute late to your lesson. He took your hand in his and the two of you walked in after everyone had taken their seats.

“Mr Malfoy, Miss Y/L/N, you are late to my lesson” Snape stated.

The whole class turned and looked at you, noting your hand clearly being held by Draco

“Sorry professor, we accidentally walked the long way from potions” Draco explained, swinging your hands.

“Two points from Slytherin, take your seats.” The two of you sat down.

“You and Draco?” Daphne hissed, knowing how long you had been crushing on him.

“Mind your business, Greengrass” Draco replied, sitting back in his chair putting his arm around the back of your seat.

“I'll explain later,” You promised, not wanting to piss off Snape, by talking in his lesson, any more than you already had.

For the rest of the day, you were ogled at like some caged animal in a zoo. Students from every year glanced and immediately dissolved into whispers with their friends. Word clearly travels fast around Hogwarts. You walked out of your last lesson with Daphne, getting ready to head to the Slytherin common room before dinner.

“You better be getting ready to explain this whole thing to me.” She said, pulling you away from the other students

“Yes, as soon as we get to our dorm-”

“Mind if I steal my girlfriend from you, Daphne?” Draco interrupted, appearing from what seemed to be nowhere.

“Yes I do actually,” She replied, pulling you further from Draco.

“Too bad, I’ll be taking her anyway”

“I swear I’ll tell you daph-” You explained apologetically, pulling your arm from her grasp.

Daphne stomped her foot like a toddler and turned to walk to the Slytherin common room. You, on the other hand, were stood with Draco, getting, even more, stares because the two of you were finally stood together, giving feeding truth into the rumour that was swirling around the school. He put his arm lazily around your shoulders and the two of you began your stroll to a more quiet part of the castle.

“I know you want to tell Daphne everything, but do you think that's wise?” He asked quietly

“Yes, she's my best friend, why wouldn't I?”

“I thought I was, I’m hurt”

“You are, you mug, but she is too”

“You know what a big mouth Daphne has, not to mention you know what she’s like once shes had a bit to drink, she might let it slip.”

You pondered what Draco had said. It was no secret that Daphne Greengrass liked to gossip, but it was also no secret that she couldn't handle her alcohol, spilling some of her families darkest secrets after a few shots. Not to mention had she slipped out that you lied about dating Draco it would be embarrassing for not only you but him.

“Ugh I hate that you’re right”

“When am I not?”

“But what am I supposed to tell her when she asks? She knows when I’m lying”

“Well we did spend basically the entire summer together, we’ll just say it happened then.”

“This is all so stressful! Why couldn't I have thought of another excuse? If I knew this was going to be the outcome, I would have agreed with him and said I found him ugly,” You dropped your head onto his chest. He wrapped both of his arms around you, swaying side to side.

“I know, love, but its too late to go back now”

You and Draco had been in this exact moment before in your friendship, only this time it felt different. You felt like you were more than two best friends consoling one another, it was almost as if you were just two teenagers in love. Only for a short while before reality came crashing down on you, it was all just fake.

The two of you went back to the common room to drop your school bags and robes before making your way to the hall for dinner. Despite it being late, there was still a large proportion of students sat down to eat. You took a deep breath as Draco’s hold on your hand tightened and the two of you walked in. Every single pair of eyes in the room were trained on you, it felt like an eternity before you finally got to your seats on the Slytherin table.

“Finally, you have no excuse not to explain yourself to me now, Y/N” Daphne scoffed.

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist, Greengrass. Were going out, that's it, what more do you want?” Draco retorted.

“Id like to know when, how, where. All of the details, Malfoy”

“Well we started going out in the holidays-” You began to explain before she cut you off.

“Pardon, the summer? As in 6 months ago? You have been hiding your relationship from me, your best friend for 6 whole months?” Daphne’s voice began to rise.

“Daphne-”

“Watch how you talk to my girlfriend, Greengrass, otherwise you'll find you can't speak another word.” Draco practically snarled at her, he looked as though he was about to rip her head off.

“I wanted to tell you, Daph I really did, I just wanted to keep it between Draco and I for a while, just in case it didn't work out, so it wouldn't be awkward.” You explained calmly.

“Hm, I guess that's a valid reason, you’re forgiven for now. But from here on out, I want to know everything. Did you at least find out who that ghastly cake was from?”

“Terry Boot”

She almost choked on her rice. You filled her goblet with some water and slid it to her.

“He confessed to me in potions, I tried to say I wasn't interested but he basically forced me to admit that I had a boyfriend”

“You poor thing,”

She had quickly forgotten and moved onto the next piece of Hogwarts gossip that took her fancy. Draco was engrossed with his own conversations and it hit you, your new reality was Draco Malfoy’s girlfriend, that was until Terry Boot managed to get his own one. It was something you had wanted since the second year, you felt as though you should have been over the moon, one of your most wild fantasies was playing out right in front of you, but you weren't. It wasn't going to last, you were sure he didn't even like you that way, he was just being the kind but overprotective Draco you had got to know over the past few years.

Once you had filled yourselves up with dinner, you and your friends made your way back to the common room, Draco's hand found yours and he held it as you walked down to the dungeons. Once you had got to the common room, Blaise forced a group of fourth years off the sofa in front of the fire and pulled out his deck of exploding snap, which you all played as a group. The warmth of the fire coupled with the comfort of the sofa made you want to curl up and fall asleep, you could feel your eyelids drooping as you tried and failed to suppress a yawn.

“Tired, love?” He asked, tilting his head.

“A little bit, I think I’ll head up to sleep in a bit” You responded, another small yawn passing your lips.

He nodded and simply pulled you into his side, your head falling on his chest and his arm around you resting on your hip

“God, you two are disgusting” Pansy grumbled as she walked past, taking note of you and Draco in your loved-up state.

“We all know you're just jealous you’re not in Y/N’s place” Crabbe laughed.

“Shut up Crabbe,” She snapped, trying to hit him around the back of his head but failing.

Your whole group laughed as she stomped away. You only managed to last another hour before you really were going to fall asleep, though you were reluctant to move from your position, you got up and announced you'd be heading to bed.

“I think I’ll join you.” Daphne yawned, getting up and stretching.

You made a move to leave but were pulled back by Draco.

“Gonna leave without saying goodnight were you?” He smiled

You laughed, “of course not, goodnight, Draco”

He kissed the back of your hand, sending a jolt of electricity from where his lips touched right to your brain, “goodnight, princess”

You smiled and headed up to bed, feeling as though you were floating on cloud 9.

Over the next few days, you had fallen into a routine, he’d wait at the bottom of the stairs from your dormitory for you to come down every morning, as soon as he saw you, he’d chirp a “good morning, love” before walking you to breakfast. He would walk you to and from every lesson that you didn’t have with him, he even went as far as waiting outside the girl's bathroom for you so he could walk with you back to the library. You had to admit it, Draco Malfoy was the best fake boyfriend.

One cold Wednesday afternoon, you were in the middle of a potions lesson, Slughorn was going on and on about the properties of belladonna, he even hinted it would come up in your exam, but all you could focus on was the contractions of your uterus. The first two days of your period were the worst, horrific cramps, bloating, tender boobs and hot flushes. Madam Pomfrey was aware of how debilitating your period was and would always send owls to your teachers informing them you would be absent from lessons, you didn't even care that Snape would find out about your period, all you wanted was to lie in bed. You tried your hardest to ride out the pain for the next 40 minutes of the lesson before you could go to the hospital wing and get something for the pain.

“Just ask Slughorn to leave early,” Daphne whispered.

“This is going to be on the exam, I can't just leave now”

“Y/N, you are literally dying, I’ll give you my notes, just please go to the hospital wing”

“I’ll be fine,”

You took a deep breath and shrugged your robe off you in an attempt to cool down. Draco slide you a note

‘Everything okay?’

‘Yeah, just my period, nothing to worry about :)’

‘Are you sure? I know how bad they get’

‘I’ll be fine, focus on the lesson!’

‘How can I focus when you’re in pain’

‘Oh shut up, I’ll be fine, I’m a big girl’

Draco read your last message and slid the sheet of parchment into his textbook. Another jolt of pain ran across your abdomen, causing you to squeeze your belly in pain. Draco’s arm shot up almost instantaneously.

“Professor, Y/N isn't feeling well, may I escort her to the hospital wing?”

“Of course m’boy”

You glared at Draco before collecting your things. and trying to discreetly leave the classroom without disrupting the lesson further.

“Do feel better Y/L/N” Slughorn called from the front of the room.

“Thank you, professor” you mumbled, feeling slightly embarrassed.

“Here give me your bag,” He said, going to grab your bag off your shoulder.

“I’m on my period, Draco, not dying”

He held out his hand anyway and you handed him your bag. He knew you hated being touched too much, it made you feel hotter, so he linked his pinky with yours.

“The corridors are empty, you don't need to hold my hand,” you stated, looking around

“I don't need to but I like to, your hands are soft” You saw him blush slightly as he said it. You simply smiled as the two of you walked into the hospital wing.

“Ah, miss Y/L/N, I’ve been expecting a visit from you” Madam Pomfrey went into her store cupboard and produced a violet potion and measured a dose. “You know the drill, come back tomorrow after breakfast and I’ll give you more, I’ll send an owl to your teachers, what’s your next lesson?”

“We have transfiguration” Draco answered for you while you finished downing your medicine.

“Right, well I’ll tell Professor McGonagall you'll both be absent from the lesson, be sure to catch up with the missing work Mr Malfoy”

You thanked Madam Pomfrey before returning to the Slytherin dormitory. The boys had managed to disable the charm that prevented them from coming up into the girls' dorms, so Draco followed you up.

“Draco, honestly I’m fine.” You signed, dropping onto your bed

“You don’t look fine,” He crossed his arms and looked down at you.

“I just need to get into some comfy clothes and lie down and I’ll be fine, I even have chocolate in my trunk.” You crouched down and opened your trunk and fished out your slab of Honeydukes chocolate. surprised to find that you only had 6 squares left.

“That’s hardly enough, wait here.”

“Dra-”

He turned and went down the stairs, leaving you alone. You changed out of your skirt and into some comfy trousers and were about to unbutton your blouse when Draco returned with a full slab of Honeydukes chocolate and his old quidditch jumper.

“I remember you saying how soft this was, I don't need it anymore, you're free to keep it,” He said sheepishly

“Thank you, Draco, seriously” He smiled at you and just stood there, looking at you. “Erm, I need to change,”

He slowly turned around and you unbuttoned your blouse and unhooked your bra throwing it on your bed before putting the jumper on.

“I’m done,”

He turned around, his eyes immediately landing on your black lace bra on your bed, you followed his gaze and quickly snatched the bra and stuffed it back in your trunk.

“I had you pegged for a cotton bra girl myself,” He smirked

“If you think that's scandalous, you should see what I wear on the bottom” you replied, winking. You got under your covers and began to open the chocolate, Draco sat awkwardly at the foot of your bed.

“Why are you sitting like that?”

“I’ve never been in your dormitory before,”

“It's literally the same as yours, come, sit” You moved a bit to the side and he came and sat next to you, stretching his legs out. At this point it was a reflex, his arms wrapped themselves around you as you buried yourself into him.

“Draco,”

“Hmmm”

“Thank you,”

“You’ve said that already”

“I mean it, honestly,”

“Anything for you, princess”. You two fell into a comfortable silence as you lay on his chest, being lulled to sleep by his chest rising and falling.

You were awoken by a loud squeal, you blinked and slowly opened your eyes.

“You two are just the cutest!” Daphne shouted.

You looked around confused for a moment until you saw what was in Daphne’s hand. She handed you a small bouquet of roses with a note attached that read:

I didn't have the heart to wake you, I’ll bring you dinner if you're not up to coming down, I hope you feel better, love - D x

You smiled as you conjured up a small vase filled with water. It was time to admit it, you were deeply, truly and utterly in love with Draco Malfoy

A Hogsmeade trip had been planned for that weekend, at first, you were planning on skipping it, but after some convincing, you decided you’d go. You decided to replenish your potions store, as well as getting some more quills and ink. Draco treated you to some sweets from Honeydukes, before you and your group headed into the three broomsticks to grab a butterbeer before you returned to the castle. You sat in a booth with Blaise, Daphne, Goyle and Pansy, choosing to squeeze yourself right in the corner. Blaise got up to order the drinks returning a few moments later with six butterbeers in his hands. The six of you fell into a discussion about the quidditch tournament, the boys getting heated over Ravenclaw’s win over Slytherin in their last match. After a while Daphne excused herself to go to the bathroom, only to run back a few moments later.

“You will not guess who I just saw snogging Hannah Abbott in the women’s toilet” Daphne yelled, sitting back in her seat at the end of the table.

You all looked at her, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“Terry fucking Boot!”

The whole group looked at you and Draco. At that moment you felt a million different emotions, recently it had felt like you weren't faking anymore, you had tricked yourself into thinking that it was all real, forgetting about your deal with Draco. But you knew that this revelation meant it was all over, you and Draco would fake an amicable break-up and remain to be best friends and the thought of that killed you.

“Well, at least now he won't get hexed for looking at my girlfriend” Draco joked.

You smiled and took a sip of your butterbeer. Once you had all finished your drinks, you returned to the castle and settled in your spot in the common room. You were sat with Draco but all you could think about was how this little bubble you were in was going to burst soon. You practically zoned out, your eyes losing focus as you stared at the fire.

“Are you quite alright? You look as though you’ve been stunned” Daphne asked, looking confused.

“Mmm I don’t feel too good, I don't think being out in the cold was a good idea” you mumbled, blinking slowly.

Daphne came and felt your forehead.

“You do feel a bit warm, why don’t you go lie down for a while”

You agreed and went up to lie in your bed for a while. You ended up skipping dinner too, you played up your symptoms to Daphne and she left you alone out of fear that she’d catch whatever you had. You didn’t end up getting out of bed until the next morning, barely having the energy to brush your teeth before you trudged to the great hall for breakfast in your pyjamas. Draco saw you come in and his eyes lit up, he was worried after Daphne told him you were sick. As soon as you sat down he began to pile food into your plate.

“Whoa calm down, I’ll barely be able to eat half of that” You pushed his hand back to the bowl of baked beans prompting him to drop the spoon back into the bowl.

“You haven’t eaten since yesterday, you must be starving, love”

You shook your head reaching for a cereal bowl instead. He looked at you concern filling his face. He kept glancing over at you while you ate, making note of your unusual silence. Once he had noticed you stopped eating your cereal squeezed your hand under the table, you pulled your hand away and acted as though you were scratching an itch on the side of your neck.

“Y/N why don’t we take a visit to madam Pomfrey, just to make sure you’re okay”

“I’m fine Draco, it’s probably just a cold”

“Draco’s right, you should make sure it’s nothing contagious or something” Daphne agreed

“Fine, let’s go then” You dusted your pyjamas off and got up, defeated.

You followed Draco out of the great hall. He began walking the opposite direction to the hospital wing and pulled you into a deserted part of the corridor.

“Are you okay?” He asked immediately, his tall frame towering over you.

“I’m just tired Draco, that’s all”

“You can’t lie to me, I’m your best friend”

“I’m not lying, I’m just tired, I haven’t been sleeping well the past few days”

“Has someone said something? Threatened you? I swear if I get my hands on them”

“No ones done anything. You don’t need to keep the overprotective boyfriend act up anymore, we’re alone and Terry has a girlfriend now”

“Act?” His face had fallen and he turned to look away

“Draco?”

“You really thought it was all an act?”

“Was it not? You said it yourself, we were faking it until he got a girlfriend so that he wouldn’t try and make a move on me”

“How can you be one of the smartest witches in our house but be so dense at the same time. “

“Excuse me,”

“It wasn't an act for me”

Your heart stopped.

“What?” you honestly couldn’t believe what you were hearing

“It wasn't an act for me. I didn't do all that just because I wanted Boot to back off, I did it cause I’ve fancied you for a while” Draco began pacing, as he explained himself

“but-”

“You said you would have gone out with the sender of that cake if it wasn't anonymously sent. I don't know why, but it didn’t sit right with me. I didn't like the fact that you were willing to go out with someone that wasn't me.”

“So you waited for me to find out who did send it, so you could propose this crazy idea?”

“I didn’t expect you to find out, hell I didn't even know I was going to say it, but once you agreed to go along with it, I felt like maybe you’d see that us being more than just best friends wasn't that bad, and maybe you'd be willing to give me a chance.”

“Can I let you in on a little secret?”

He stopped and looked down at you and nodded,

“I've fancied you since second year”

He smiled and grabbed both your hands

“And since we’ve been fake going out, I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you now,”

“Say that again”

“I’m in love with you Draco,”

“Say it again,” he said, placing his hands on your cheeks and staring into your eyes with adoration.

You laughed “I love you”

“I love you so much more, princess. Way more than I can even explain”

You beamed up at him, you felt like you could honestly explode at this point. all those years of crushing on him and wishing you could tell him how you felt, and here you were.

“I'm going to kiss you” He whispered

“I think it's about time you did”

He moved slowly before giving you a sweet but passionate kiss. His lips were softer than you thought they'd be.

“At least now we don't need to worry about telling our friends,” You joked, resting your forehead against his.

He laughed and kissed you again. Something you know you would never get tired of. As cliche as it seemed, you did it, your best friend was now your boyfriend. It was just you and Draco, safe in your perfect bubble.

[savnofilter]

You’re Perfect

Bakugo x Fat!Reader [3.4k words]

warning(s): sexual content, angst, fluff, mentioned bullying, might be triggering, implied anxiety attack, body dysmorphia, body worship, praise kink.

a/n: for any sfw readers, about first half of the fic is strictly sfw. line “It took you a second” is when it gets spicy, ““Shit… you okay? I didn’t hurt you or anything?”” is when its chill again. <////<

ahhhh, i sincerely apologize to the requester for this being so late. i too at the time was struggling with my weight when i had received this, i hope this makes up for lost time. this hit home to write since its painful to see someone you love go through hating themselves for something they cant control. if there is ANYTHING THAT MAKES YOU (THE READER) UNCOMFORTABLE PLEASE LET ME KNOW! i will fix it up ASAP. as my other awareness posts or sensitive topic fics, i hope this helps more than hurts. 

if anyone makes fun of you for your weight (especially on anonymous) theyre fucking losers. if someone cant say shit to your face they dont matter!! and if they do? they still dont matter. as long as you are healthy you are 100% valid, no matter your size. thank you anon, i hope you have a splendid night! 💓

His mouth danced with yours as you two had finally gotten back from a long day of shopping together. His hands wandered under the cute hoodie that you had borrowed from him, your beautiful body doing it more justice than his. His calloused hands gave your sides a playful squeeze, smirking lightly at your slight moan at the feeling. Just when he was about to lift the material from your body is when you had stopped him abruptly. 

Bakugo frowned upon watching as you kept your hoodie down, shying away from his eyes and not making any move to speak rather than to tell him “no”. He sat back on his heels, your skirt already ridden up, but that too was brought down by your persistent hands. Bakugo’s brows furrowed in confusion, eyes scanning your face and trying to figure out what the hell was wrong. 

“Babe, what the hell are you doing?” He asked, his voice communicating his confusion.

“I-I just don’t feel like it anymore.” You mumble, hand flying up to cover your face, a sure sign that you were lying to him. Bakugo’s face didn’t change at your words, the other indication of that was the subtle change in his facial expression. He moved back, his hands carefully lifting your thighs from around his waist and helping you sit better on the bed again. 

“What’s the issue? Did someone do something to you?” He asks one question right over the other, thinking out loud instead of letting you speak as he gives you more space. “I swear I’ll kill whoever did it, those fuckers don’t know what’s coming to them-”

“It was about us,” You whisper, “those girls were talking about us.” Your change in volume catching his attention, whipping his head to look in your direction once again. He was startled to find that you were crying, the dead giveaway being the wet spots that coated the once dry edge of your sleeves. “How I’m not good enough for you b-because…” Finishing the sentence was hard. Your voice trembled as you struggled to talk, the painful squeezing in your chest making it impossible to think straight. He couldn’t say anything as he waited for you to continue, too worried that if he spoke too soon he’d cause you more harm than healing.

“I’ve been trying so hard to ignore it but, it’s just so fucking hard not to. People always tell me about how I look when I can already see it by myself. I don’t need someone to point out my weight because I live with it every fucking day! When they send me their bullshit when we’re together -- it’s always when we’re together. I fucking hate it!” You cried harder, your emotions coming up and swallowing you whole. Had this been with anyone else, it would’ve been hard. Since Bakugo had already been with you a few times to know your insecurities and aid you back to a level head, making this easier to open up. “Those girls… they talk about how you’re better than me, how you’d leave me because I’m not shaped like the other girls, how--how I’m not your type! And it’s every-fucking-day.” You whimpered at the end of your sentence, your anxiety not aiding in the fact that it was getting so much harder and harder to think straight or breathe. “It hurts so fucking much because I love you so much, K-Katsuki -- it hurts s-so much!”

At this stage in your breakdown, you didn’t even have enough courage to look up at him or inch away when you felt him get closer to you. He was silent as he watched you sobbed, gulping anxiously as he too tried to hold back his pain at watching you like this. He quickly scanned the room to let his words flow for whatever reason, the action aiding him in speaking to you. Of course, he had known that once you two moved onto a university setting that more people would try anything to get on top. Bullying was something he was over and something he had grown to despise. The thought and knowledge of people being awful to you made him incredibly sick.

“Is that what has been bothering you so much?” Bakugo asked, gently getting enough room for him to bring you into his lap into his arms. You nodded as you continued to sob, the harshness before only dimming down just a bit by him embracing you in his arms. “Fuck those extras. Those chicks don’t even know what they’re talking about, if they spent more time on themselves they’d pass better in class!” He huffs. He doesn't need to anything about who there and what their motives were, not wanting to feed into their pathetic bullshit. It was losers who don’t even have the privilege to talk to him for Bakugo. “You’re fucking beautiful, Y/N. Don’t let some nameless bullies get to you, they’re nothing but jealous bottom-feeders. You’re your own person even without me -- and hell I would still be pinning after you even if we weren’t together.” He mumbles against your temple, his hand that held under thighs in a tight but comfortable grip gave them a loving squeeze, his other hand that wrapped around your shoulders giving the same effort. 

He smiled softly once the sound of your crying subsided the more he continued his words. He places a kiss on your temple once he manages to earn a sorrowful giggle from you, nuzzling your hair as he softly rocked you. “Don’t let those people get to you… they have nothing better to do.” He carries, his tone softer than the last time. “I don’t know what’s it like to be in your shoes, but I am here for you, alright?” He reassures. The nod of your head was all he needed as he let you calm down, not moving or speaking another word till you were comfortable in moving again.

He gave you a moment to collect yourself, reminding you of the breathing exercises you often did to get you to breathe normally again. It wasn’t until when you had gained enough reassurance you were able to lift your head from your curled up position, using the other dry side of your sleeves to clean your cheeks. He swoops in to give your closest cheek playful kisses, the feeling of his lips against your skin making you chuckle and move your face away. 

“Katsuki, stooop~” You tease him, moving your face away from him and letting his kisses trail down your neck. He stops once you down at him with a playful grin, your vibrant smile back on your face. 

“There my beautiful and amazing, Y/N, is~” He teases back, leaning in to give your lips a peck and pulling away to carefully let you back on the bed. You take a small deep breath, your hands coming up to wipe your face again. “Thank you, Katsuki. Sorry if I ruined the mood, I didn’t mean it…”

“Eh, what the hell. I would rather sex you up when you’re ready not when you’re someplace else.” He nudges you jokingly, smirking down at your semi-surprised face. “I could get you a bath, queue up some movies, if that’s what you want-”

“N-No, I would like to continue where we l-left off.”

It took you a second before you could look up at him, both pairs of eyes reading each other. You were the first to lean in, his hand coming up to cup your cheek and sealing the kiss halfway through. You positioned your body to face him better, him the same as you two sat at the edge of the bed getting into your interrupted make-out session once again. Your hands gripped the bottom of his shirt as his other disappeared under your hoodie once again, you two letting your hands refuge wherever they could find it. 

His thumb softly caressed your skin as he leaned more into you, you both moving to lay back onto the bed. His hand trailed from your jaw back to his earlier position before you had your break, pausing just slightly and continuing their journey downwards -- in fear of repeating the same emotions that had jumped up when you two had first started. His calloused hands landed on your thighs and spread them with enough room for him to fit between your thicc thighs. His hands gave them a sensual squeeze, dragging up playfully to disappear under your skirt as he caressed the plush skin under it. 

His tongue invaded your mouth while you let his hands roam wherever they so, please. His mouth swallowed your cute and surprised yelp when his hand found its way into your laced panties and gave your bean a testing rub. Once his advances weren't rejected he proceeded to continue rubbing. He opened his eyes to watch your face relax into one of lewdity, quickening his pace to the one you liked. His fingers were skilled in rubbing up and down to collecting your slick, making it easier to rub against your skin and bundle of nerves.

When you had pulled away it was one of the most erotic sights he has ever seen from you: expression needy, mouth open, and tongue hanging out your mouth as panted from the rush of adrenaline. A string of saliva connected you two, the experience causing his cock to twitch in excitement. He leaned down to give you a quick kiss to get rid of it and pulled away to get the rest of your clothes off. His hands gripped the bottom of the hoodie, red and lustful eyes looking up at you for consent before getting the clothing off your body. He groaned watching your chest heave in excitement, hands trailing your sides, and moving to kiss your neck.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, baby~” He mumbles against your skin, giving it a playful bite and sucking on it. “And you’re all fucking mine, you got it~?” He trails his kisses to different parts of your chest and collarbone, making sure to leave it in places that could easily be seen. “I’m going to let every extra know it too~”

You moaned out his name once he continued his possessiveness, hands groping your tits through your bra and fondling them. The soft but stimulating fabric of bra aided in giving you the extra boost of hormones that he had given your cunt minutes ago, shamelessly rubbing against the front of his pants to gain stimulation. 

His kisses didn’t stop at your chest and collarbones, his adventure continuing when his hands went behind your back to un-clip your bra and watch as your breast spilled from the contraption. He mutters to himself at how cute your chest was, the hardened nipples aiding in their beauty. He couldn’t help but swoop in and take a bud in his mouth, already sucking on the proud buds. His tongue swept across the hardened nerves and sucked on them as well, his other hand fondled the other. His unoccupied hand moves back under your skirt and inside your panties, playing with your womanhood, his main focus to give you utmost pleasure. 

He hums happily hearing you moan and whimper for him, your hands gripping the shirt he still kept on. The contrast of how much clothes you two were wearing was making you self conscious, but in the hot, bothered and vulnerable -- and not the bad kind of way. Once he could feel your cunt slicking up he smirked against your skin and continued his ministrations. Bakugo takes two experimental rubs against your entrance, dipping the tips in and slowly sinking them both in at once. His teeth lightly tug at your nipple as he pulls away, letting it go before giving it a teasing peck.

“You like my fingers in you, baby~?” He lightly taunts you, watching as your hips buck into his hand once he chooses to rub over your g-spot from the get-go. “You like it when I tease you like this, Y/N~?” Of course, he wasn’t expecting a verbal response from you. Your whimpering, and nodding being enough.

He let his fingers work inside you, tips repeatedly grazing and teasing your g-spot to watch your tremble and quiver. Choked words came from your mouth, your eyes never leaving his as he watched down at you in a predatory gaze. The corners of his mouth etched into a smirk, unbeknownst to you that how beautiful you looked made his heart race, his thumb doing its work to further its pleasure and keep you squirming beneath him. The sound of your cunt sucking around him was erotic, Bakugo flipping up your skirt just to see the mess underneath. “Fuck~ this pretty little cunt is mine~” He growls out from the feeling of your walls tightening around his digits at the compliment. Surely he wasn’t expecting you to cum this quick, his free hand gripping one of your thighs and pushing it back to let his fingers hit differently inside you. The mixture of his fingers pumping in and out of the hot core and his thumb swiping at your swollen nerves was enough to drive you over, giving him a loud cry he always yearned to hear when you guys get busy in your dorm room. He carefully removes his drenched fingers from your wanton cunt, dryly swallowing at the loss from around his fingers.

“Such a good girl…” He mutters to you, whether or not you were supposed to hear it or not mattering to you once he rips off your skirt, his hands gripping your waist and squeezing your waist. His eyes scanned and drank in your naked state, his cheeks tinting a happy pink on his tanned skin as he thought of all the things he could do to you, his boner officially pressing against the restraints of his pants. His hands trailed your body, giving the parts of your body sensual gropes and held you with gentleness. It was like he wanted to let you know he cherished every bit of you. 

Bakugo was quick on getting his clothes off, ready to finally have his cock inside you. His fingers danced across your way to lube himself up again, pumping his cock as he looked you over. He makes strong eye contact with you, his nose flare in hot arousal. “Are you ready to continue, babe?” He asks softly, gripping your thighs and wrapping your legs around his waist. 

“Please, Katsuki, please make love to me…” You ask meekly in response, your hands circling his shoulders and pulling him closer. His face nuzzles your neck and nods his head in response, pressing his tip against your opening before thrusting in.

“Be careful what you wish for~” He simply says as he hits inside you and holds you close. His pace was relentlessly but not in an aggressive way, the enthusiasm of his thrusts showing his passion for having sex with you. Your hips met with every thrust, body bouncing against his as he moved his hips against yours. The resonating sound of him moving in and out of you was flustering, to say the least, the sound not alone and having the sound of your wet pussy to partner along with it. 

His hands caged your head in as they rested on beside your face and on your plush pillows, anchoring himself and helping him move in you. He peeked down to watch as you reacted to him, from the way your face twitched in pleasure to the way your body moved against his was to put simply, euphoric. 

“There’s my beautiful girl, moan for me, baby~” Bakugo held no resentments in showering you with compliments, adding a little razzle-dazzle to the experience between you two. While some were straight-up dirty some were wholesome. The scale of how Bakugo went along with making you feel better and loved almost made you tear up once again. You swallowed the tears more for your own fear of shedding emotion and not wanting to ruin the mood again.

But that wasn’t the case.

Once Bakugo noticed your tear-stained cheeks, admittedly his heart did squeeze. He gave you a promise that he loves as he slowed his thrusts just for you, his hands coming up to cup your cheeks and give you a passionate kiss on the lips. He didn’t try to make it steamy or long, nor did he pull away to hear you say the same words back. He just wanted you to feel loved and desired in that very moment his words reached far behind the sensual confines of the bed you both sometimes shared.

So you let your feelings out. 

This time it was from the overwhelming love you held for your longtime boyfriend.

He kissed away and rubbed your cheeks as he left you to cling onto him. He set his pace to one he knew you loved, doing nothing more than pleasuring you and helping you move along to your orgasm. His lips littered your exposed collarbones, shoulders, neck, chest -- anywhere he could appropriately reach and where he could find. He kissed the characteristic and lovely blemishes on your skin, the reappearing and disappearing stretch marks he loved to caress late at night, and the old hickies left by your one and only~ He made sure to give you his all.

Your hands interlocked with his as you announced you were close, eyes watching up into him as his hips stuttered to meet your climax as well. He allowed himself to adjust to comfort without restraints. He sat deep in you as you released on his cock, your soft pants leaving your chest. He mutters another “I love you” to you for another good measure, kissing up to your neck and nipping your earlobe and sucking on it. He held you in his arms till you were done, carefully pulling away and pulling out, cussing lightly under his breath as he admired you. 

“Shit… you okay? I didn’t hurt you or anything?” He asks with slight worry, his cheeks tinting red again when you left your hands to cup his cheeks instead this time. You smiled up at him once he focused on you, thumbs softly rubbing the soft and warm skin of his attractive face.

“I’m okay. Thank you, Katsuki…” He pulls you into another hug, his arms holding onto you so tight that you believed that he wouldn't let go no matter what. “I-I love you too.”

You felt safe. 

Being on your own and not in the comfort of your home was scary on its own. But, with the added support of your boyfriend never made you pull away from loving yourself. You hadn’t expected to meet Bakugo or elope with him after his era of horrid behavior back in junior secondary school. You giggle to yourself as you think about old Bakugo and how much he’s changed, gaining a confused look from him.

“What’s so funny, brat?” He asks playfully, his hand coming up to flick your forehead. You whine at the feeling, still smiling anyways. 

“You’ve changed a lot, Katsuki.” You answer with just as much lightness, thanking him when he brings back a towel for you both to get cleaned up. “It’s honestly endearing if you ask me~”

“Save it for dinner.” He mumbles back, cheeks hot with embarrassment as you compliment his character development over the years. He gets off the bed and holds your hands to get you up, giving the same spot on your forehead a gentle kiss to somewhat “soothe” it. 

“Change into something comfortable, I have to show you something that will blow your fuckin’ socks off.” He grins as he pulls away. He get to changing into the settings attire from the few draws you let him borrow for his clothes, shooing you away and giving your butt a playful smack once you leave and smirking at your yelp. 

You pout rubbing your butt and go to your closet to pick out something this time around, deciding the leading choice for the outfit would be another one of his at-home hoodies that you wore out when you wanted him most. “May I ask where-”

“Of course not.” He answers before you can finish, peeking back at you once you dressed already, smiling softly as he hops up. “Just wear something that you can get dirty in. We’re going to make some unforgettable memories~”

[fire-emblem-drabbles]

hhhhhh,,,, fluffy centaur Quan x summoner pls and thank u. Maybe he teaches them not to be afraid of horses?

I actually thought about writing this like, all day yesterday, so catch me finally getting to this!!! The real mood is thinking about writing but never doing it hahah. me reading this: oh fluffy?? I’ll… I’ll get there. 

OKAY SO THIS IS ABOUT 2500 WORDS AND I WAS PLANNING ON WRITING MOREE BUT THAT CAN BE FOR A PART 2!

In other words, as of putting this in my queue, I’m free form the grasp of this fic and hopefully, halfway through November, I can add something to the “November Mastlist” post that has sat in my drafts. 

You couldn’t see yourself without an animal by your side;  you adored dogs and cats or birds and fish, honestly, most animals warmed your heart. You had even met a few mythical creatures in your time, there was a sweet river nymph who lived very close to your property, and you had once nursed a wisp when it was weak during the winter months. Yes, you adored all animals; alas, horses terrified you.

There was an incident from when you were a child that you hated to recall; you had traveled to town with your mother to pick up some things from the market, and your curious little nature brought you up to a caravan horse. The man had warned you that his horse was a feisty one, but you were young and stupid and must have done something to upset it-your memory got fuzzy around here- because I next moment you could recall was having the wind knocked out of you and feeling tears fall down your face.

The horse had bucked, and hit you square in the chest; you broke 3 of your lower ribs and sported an ugly purple bruise. You then had to be bedridden for a few weeks while they healed. And while you were older now, you still had some hesitance towards the creatures. You would like to get to know one but your fear held you back.

Today was a normal day, though you chest ached at the old memory. You were going to collect fruit at the fringes of your property, and you had your basket already. It was a short walk over, but the day was peaceful and the sun was welcoming. It wasn’t long before you got to your cherry trees, but before you could begin picking them, you froze. Was… was that a horse, somehow lost amongst your trees?

The horse moved, and to your absolute horror, your met eyes with a person. Well, obviously not a person, a centaur. You would have screamed, but really you were too shocked to even speak. Weren’t centaurs nomadic? What was one even doing near here?

“Hello? I-is someone there?” he moved towards you, and you got view of the gash along his side. “I fear I can’t see well...” He stepped closer to you, and you stumbled back. He was obviously injured, but still, fear paralyzed you. “Please, I… I need help...”

“I-I,” Somehow you found your voice. Despite how scared you were, you knew he needed help. You had the proper training, if you could get him back to your house you could treat him but… getting back to your home would be the hardest part. “I’m, I’m here.” You stepped more into his view, and his hazy eyes focused on you. “Can you, I mean… oh...” You took a deep breath. “I can help you but you have to come back to my house. Do you think you can make it that far?” You stared pointedly at the ground as you spoke, unable to meet his gaze or look at his bleeding side.

“If you err, lead the way, I should be able to make it...” He moved closer, holding his hand out to you. “Please...” You started at his outstretched hand. You took a deep breath, and clasped your hand with his, and began leading the way; if you didn’t think about it, you could make yourself believe you were leading another human away. But the pit in your stomach would not leave, and the way your house came much too soon. You always wondered why the doors were so tall, and why the ceiling was so high, perhaps this was it. Once inside your cabin-esqe home, he collapsed to the floor in a panting mess.

“O-okay, try to stay awake, I’ll um, get my things.” You moved quickly to your kitchen, relieved when he let out a little groan to tell you he was still with you. You were glad to have wood floors for once, you didn’t want to think about getting blood out of carpet.

“It’s… getting a little harder to stay awake...” His voice was faint but cut through the otherwise quiet of your home.

“You have to stay with me, okay?” Once finding what you need, you took a deep breath and returned to him. “I’m right here with you so… there’s nothing to fear.” Swallowing your own fear, you sat near to him with shaking hands and pounding heart; this was no time to panic, though, you merely had to focus on what your job was now. Once you had this wound cleaned and stitched, you could hide in your room while he slept to regain his energy. After that, who knows but for now you had a job to do.

~*~

How could one person… centaur… person… well, how could he sleep so long? As soon as you were done with his wound, you took a long bath and hid in your room but you felt bad that he was just alone curled up on your floor… so you made sure he was leaning against the couch and had a few pillows, a blanket even. You always tiptoed around him when you had to be inside, though you tried your best to stay outside. It wasn’t until the night of the third day he stirred, waking slowly to the smell of slow cooking stew.

“Hello?” His voice was quiet and thick with sleep. Slow hands came to rub at tired brown eyes, and push back wild bangs from his eyes. “Uh, is anyone there? Where am I?”

“You’re in my house.” Your voice came as a quick quip from somewhere in front of him, he had to wait for his eyes to focus. Finally, across the room he could see you before a warm stove, stirring something that smelt delicious.

“Ah, I thought I saw a fairy but I figured it was just my dreams.” A warm chuckle left him, and as he removed the blankets from himself he saw that his side was properly cleaned and bandaged. “Were you the one to heal me, little fairy?” You didn’t like how casual he sounded, how playful he seemed to be, when you were still on edge.

“Yes, that was me.” You didn’t mean to make your replies scarce, it really just happened. You didn’t know what to say to him without telling him how your heart was beating erratically. He seemed to pick up on this, despite still being a little tired, and hummed.

“Could I get my fairy’s name, then? I’m Quan.” He offered you a smile and stood to his full height, stretching his human limbs as he did so.

“Please don’t call me fairy… my name is um, _____.” You said softly, unwilling to look at him.  “Dinner won’t be ready until a little while longer, so why don’t you bathe? I err, don’t think my bathroom could fit you, but if you leave the house and head west a bit, you’ll find a river.” You just wanted him out for a bit so you could collect your thoughts.

“Oh, um, alright?” Quan laughed a little. “I’ll take you up on that offer, then.” He was just about to leave before you spoke again.

“Oh but, um, make sure you ask Lorelei first, okay? She doesn’t like people barging into her water without asking.”

“Lorelei?” he asked, glancing over to you.

“She’s a water nymph who makes the river around my property her home.” Was all you said. Quan nodded, opening the door and leaving your home after that. Perhaps this Lorelei could tell him why you were acting so strange around him. Quan knew you had to be kind; it's not every day a stranger takes you in, stitches your wounds, and offers to feed you. Still, you refused to meet his gaze, and hardly had a reply for him. Perhaps you were just shy? But it felt like so much more than that…

It wasn’t long before Quan found his way to the river, as you said he would, but he didn’t see anyone there, nymph or otherwise. So tentatively, he called out “Um, Lorelei?” It was silent a moment, and Quan felt silly for having called out when no one was there, but mischievous laughter filled his ears soon enough.

“Oo are you the one _____ brought back?” Quan looked to the other shore, and there a woman with short hair sat, eyeing him up and down. “I see, no wonder she sounded so scared...” Lorelei, he assumed, spoke under her breath and nodded to herself, smirking then. “What can I do for you, handsome?” She sat up fully, grinning all the while.

“Uh, Quan. Call me Quan.” Lorelei nodded, though he felt she wouldn’t call him by name. “_____ said I could bathe here. That is if I asked. So may I?” Quan asked, smile on his face. Lorelei smiled a little wider.

“Why do I feel that’s not all?” Her voice was sing-song, and she giggled after. “What else did you want to ask Mr. Centaur?” Lorelei winked, and Quan wondered how she could read him so easily, but perhaps it was simply written all over his face.

“____… they… for whatever reason, they seem standoffish with me.” Quan frowned a little. Did he say or do something to hurt you before he fell unconscious?

“Oh, that? It’s nothing you did, poor dear can’t help it.” Lorelei tutted softly, shaking her head. “When they were young, they got into a terrible accident with a horse that ended up hurting them a lot. They’ve been scared of horses ever since, so that could be why they’re wary of you love.” She smiled, sending a wink his way as well. “But you didn’t hear that from me, okay? You have a nice wash, dear, I’ll try not to stare too much.” And as quick as she came, Lorelei was gone. Quan was left to ponder how he should go about speaking with you now; as well as look warily over his shoulder for any peeping nymphs.

Soon enough, you were finished making the stew. You hadn’t cleared your head much, but you had come to the conclusion that you shouldn’t be mean to Quan just because you were scared of him. You didn’t want to come off as rude, but you were debating telling him why you acted in such a way… You absentmindedly filled two bowls and cut some bread to eat as well. Just as you were wondering where Quan was, a knock came at the door.

“C-come in!” You kept your back to him, after all, you still had bread to cut. You didn’t want to eat the whole loaf this evening but if you kept ignoring him too pointedly it would all end up cut.

“Lorelei was… not what I expected.” You chanced a glance at Quan, who was still a little wet from the river's water. Water stuck to his hair and face and he wasn’t wearing the clothing he was before; he probably washed that too, but you quickly turned back to the food. You didn’t want to acknowledge the blush on your face.

“She… yeah, that happens.” You shook your head, stifling a laugh that would be far too awkward. “Dinner is ready, I’m sure your starving.” You picked up a bowl for him, and two pieces of bread and carefully walked over to him. “I guess the table is too small for you so...” You trailed off, but Quan happily took the offered treats. “That’s no problem at all.” He smiled down at you but you couldn’t meet his gaze and were quick to retreat from him and grab your own food. You were tempted to sit at the table facing away from him, but again you didn’t want to be rude. So you sat at the table, and Quan stood, and the two of you ate in an awkward silence that you weren’t sure how to end. You mostly picked at your food, but you noticed how hungry Quan was; it was kinda cute though, he was still trying his best to be polite in your presence.

You stared down at your food, picking at the meat and playing with the broth. You rested your hand under your chin, and your elbow on the table. Before you could help it, a large sigh left you; one that caught Quan’s attention from his food (you noted he was nearly done anyway) and left him staring wide-eyed at you.

“Is… everything alright?” His words were soft, hesitant as you were. You stared at him a moment; in his haste to eat, he made a bit of a mess, and a bit of broth trailed down his bare chest. You looked away but somehow found it in you to reply.

“It’s… not you, as much as you may feel it is.” You looked to him again, this time searching his eyes. “I just… well...” Another sigh left you, and you closed your eyes a moment.

“You don’t need to say another word; Lorelei told me.” You opened your eyes now, lips set in a pout.

“That little jerk...” You muttered shaking your head. “She just can’t keep her mouth shut, huh?” You would have sighed again, but decided against it. “So I… guess now you know, huh?” You looked away again, even though you could feel your heated gaze on you.

“Don’t worry, I understand completely. It’s natural to feel some fear and hesitance after an experience like that.” You could hear the smile in his voice, and you disliked admitting how comforting he really sounded. “I don’t know what I can do, but I’m willing to help in any way I can.”

“Well… It’s been odd having you around, but I admit I...” You shook your head. “What am I saying….”

“No, go on. Tell me.”

“It’s going to sound stupid...”

“I doubt that sincerely, _____. I want to hear what you have to say.”

“It’s just… It’s been nice having you here? Even when you were, well, you know, just sleeping… It helped me a lot seeing you so peaceful. N-not like I watched you sleep or whatever, you were just, you know, in the middle of my living room so like...” Quan’s laughter met your ears, and you finally looked back to him. He was grinning wide with a look of mirth.

“I don’t think I’ve heard you say that much to me in our brief time together.” You blinked a moment as he still laughed, and thought about it. Perhaps that was the most you said to him-- and was it really so hard?

“I… guess so...” You smiled a little yourself, shaking your head. “Well… your stitches still need another week before I can take them out.” You said.

“During that week?” Quan asked, finished with his food now.

“Well… it’s going to sound silly but… maybe you could, well, you know… help me be… like, not so afraid of horses? And centaurs too, I guess...” You looked up to him with wide, hopeful eyes.

“It would be my honor, _____.” His smile was so charming, for a moment you lost yourself in it; perhaps the next week would be great, and you would get over your fears. Looking into his eyes, you could believe that.

[star-valo]

How Markiplier Saved Me

I’m sure everyone’s seen his late night video by now, and I’ve seen a few people in the tag posting their stories.

And I feel like now is the right time to share mine. It’s not the typical life saving story, but it definately got me out of a life where I was so terribly unhappy. And considering I’m an extremely naïve 25 year old who is now stumbling about life in such an ungodly awful manner, I feel I owe a lot of who I am now to @markiplier

This will be long. Very long. Brace yourself, I’m a story teller. - TW: Abuse mention

I met him when I was 19. He was 29, turning 30 in a few months; and a month after I met him, he was due to get married, to his girlfriend of 10 years. I was at uni, out on my own with my anxiety in full swing for the first time in my life and I wasn’t coping. I’d stopped eating entirely, I was geting every bug that went around campus and I’d lock myself away in my room for hours on end.

I forced myself to go to a convention that was near the university. Anxiety attack ensued, and I was in a very vulnerable state, which is where I met him. Subsequently, it turned out, just about every male that was remotely plesant to me that weekend, had ulterior motives. Unfortunately, his didn’t start until after the convention.

Bit of context. I’m one of those “growing up ugly” kids. The “popular” kids at school would fake crushes on me to get a laugh and ridicule me at every oppertunity. As such, I’m oblivious to any actual interest anyone may show in me. I can’t pick up on those social queues at all, because I just don’t believe they’re genuine.

He got married, we stopped talking. The next convention, 4 months after his wedding, he kissed me and made me super uncomfortable for the rest of the weekend. Apparently, married life wasn’t going too well, so his attention had moved from his wife, to me. This started the manipulation, feeding me stories about his wife, apologising endlessly for making me uncomfortable and showering me in gifts.

Against my parent’s wishes, I ended up in a relationship with him. For 3 years. and his control over me continued for an additional year before I finally managed to cut him out completely. Leaving me a rather broken 23 year old.

Now, where does Mark come in?

He is what opened my eyes to the mental and emotional abuse and blackmail I was being subjected to, and eventually pushed me to leave.

Part two of the story starts here.

I was browsing Tumblr, seeing a lot of this stuff poping up on my timeline relating to something called “Five Nights at Freddy’s” and of course, Markiplier’s name was popping up as well. I was curious. So, Hallowe’en 2014, I was visiting my bestie who I only see once a year due to distance and money, and we decided we’d watch some spooky stuff. I suggested a FNAF playthrough, to which Bestie’s sister insisted that we watch Mark’s because it was definately the best out there. So we did.

My bestie wasn’t particularly taken with FNAF so we only watched the first part, but I was hooked, I wanted to see more. So I got home and binge watched the rest of Mark’s FNAF playthrough. Of course, I wanted someone to share this new found enjoyment with (good god I loved theorising with FNAF Lore, still do), so I showed it to him. Who then proceeded to take it and use it against me, my pathetic ass wussy self that I am. I’m very easily scared as I have an extremely overactive imagination. Have since I was tiny.

He bought FNAF, would hook it up to his TV, turn out all the lights, start the night... then decide he needed a cigerette, and leave me alone whilst he went outside to smoke. Of course, I was curled up in the corner, bracing myself for the jumpscares. One night, I was at his place, I got up to go to the toilet. I’d gone to bed early because I was tired, he was still awake, drinking beer and watching crap telly. He heard me and hid on the stairs which were directly outside the door to his bedroom, where he knew I would be passing to go back to bed. Thankfully I saw him sprawled out on the stairs before he could execute his plan. He was going to play Foxy’s jumpscare sound on his phone (He had the video ready and everything) and grab my ankle as I walked past.

I won’t go in to some of the other things he did, but the manipulation was there. The sexual abuse and emotional blackmail was there. I just didn’t start to see it until I watched more of Mark.

One week when I was off work because I felt unwell and there weren’t new Markiplier videos because he’d gone into hospital (turns out I was unwell because my appendix went fucky, I went in to hospital the day Mark came out) I binge watched his old videos. I really enjoyed his Vlogs, just him talking to the camera made it feel more personal. I watched his Draw my Life, Live-action skits he’d done, Videos of him on other people’s channels too.

Even just the silly little things he’d do like calling “us” beautiful. The milestone videos where he’d say how much we mean to him, and how thankful he was for letting him have the life he has. It all got me thinking. Never had I seen emotion from my boyfriend. He had never called me beautiful, or pretty, or expressed any sort of happiness for me being around, unless it was to manipulate me. He’d cry and self harm and spout all this stuff he thought I wanted to hear when I tried to leave in the past, how he didn’t want a life without me in it, how he loved me... All when I was trying to get out. Of course I stayed because he was threatening to kill himself.

At another convention, two weeks after my appendix surgery, we wore matching FNAF Pirate Cove tops (because matching tops were his way of showing he owned me, turns out.) I got talking to some guys about FNAF, ignoring him. It was when one of the guys mentioned that he was watching a youtuber play Five nights at Fuckboys at the moment, I instantly interjected with “Markiplier?”, who of course it was. At the mention of Mark, more people perked up and joined in the conversation, isolating my then-boyfriend more because he didn’t watch Mark.

I was in a lot of pain after the first night, I spent most of the convention in my hotel room in pain, which annoyed him because he wanted to party, and I wasn’t with him. I ended up calling my dad who came to take me home two days early, which my new Markiplier-friends came to see me off and say goodbye. Of course that annoyed him too.

I’m pretty sure this was the point that he realised that it wasn’t FNAF that he had to try and take from me. It wasn’t FNAF that was helping me make the friends that he wanted to keep away. It was Mark.

From then on, he’d do everything in his power to ruin Mark for me, to make him seem like an asshole, to make me stop watching his videos. Combining this with other things that I cared about, he was starting to get desperate. His control over me was slipping. I was starting to stand up for myself and he didn’t like it.

He’d get annoyed when I started watching Prison Break with my mum because I didn’t tell him what I was doing. He got annoyed that I wouldn’t text him back, whilst I was at work, in 2 minutes. He resorted to trying to buy me, buying me gifts and food, taking me places, surprising me with things in an attempt to buy me back.

He lashed out at me for not wanting to go swimming, because he wanted to see me in a swimsuit and ignored my anxiety and low self esteem making me freak out. He got extremely angry with me for going to bed without giving him a hug, because he’d insulted me and I didn’t want to be near him. He fed me lies about how all the new friends I was making were only trying to get into my pants, how none of them really liked my company and that if Mark were here, he’d be doing the same. It’s “all they wanted”, to get into my pants, he was “protecting” me. One of my favourite singers thought I was stupid because of one line in one song.

The final straw - for him - was when, on my birthday, I didn’t facetime him when opening my presents. When I did. This is when he stopped talking to me. In six weeks he’d moved on to another girl, one he worked with. He was being rude and cruel to me, so I finally deleted him from my facebook. I didn’t want to see it. I wasn’t coping well as it was. Everything I had known for the last four years had gone, and I was left alone because he kept stopping friendships before they formed. A barrage of insults came in the form of texts. As soon as he realised I’d deleted him and his friends, and that he couldn’t monitor me anymore, he flew off the handle. I crumbled completely. I was signed off work. I was a mess. Sadly, all this happened around the time of Daniel’s passing, so Mark wasn’t uploading. That’s when I turned to Jack’s videos. He wasn’t Mark, but he was funny, and he gave me a welcome distraction from all the pain and distress I was feeling.

Since then, Mark and his videos have been my go-to before-bed entertainment, time zones and all that fun stuff. He’s what’s making me strive to better myself, to move past the barriers and fears that the abuse has left me with. To push myself, to do that cosplay, to post that drawing. Dye my hair, buy the thing, put myself out there. I’m still trying. I’m still pushing myself. I’ll get there with attempting youtube myself one day, It’s just getting the software to do it, and then i’ll have to put my face out there, which is something I hate doing. But I’ll do it. I left work because, despite it being a terrifying thing to commit to doing, I deserved to be treated better. I am capable of so much more, I just need to believe in myself and know that I can do it if I put my mind to it.

And I believe all of this because of Mark. He believes in us as a community, and us as an individual. No one has told me that as often as Mark tells us all. All I have ever wanted is to make people happy, but now I don’t feel like I have to sacrifice my own happiness for others. I can make them happy, without demeaning myself, or decreasing my value and self worth. I’m funny, I make people laugh, I’m smart and creative, and that’s not a bad thing to say. I’m not blowing my own trumpet by saying that. I’m giving myself the value and credit I deserve because It’s far too easy to say that I’m not smart, that I’m not creative and I only make people laugh by fluke.

I have talents and abilities. I shouldn’t belittle them because they make me who I am, I need to embrace them, not push them aside.

I know this may seem like I’m putting Mark on a pedestal, but I assure you I am not. I feel indebted to him, yes, because I credit him as the catalyst that gave me the strength needed to save myself. Something that no one else had done in the four years I was in that relationship.

Genuinely and Honestly Mark, If you read this, Thank you. I owe you so much. I don’t know where I would be now had I not been introduced to you and your videos. Your sense of humour matches mine so well that I can’t help but laugh with you, even when I don’t feel like smiling. You have inspired me to do more with my life, to take a leap of faith, to push myself and try new things.

It sounds stupid and fan girly, but I honestly love you, so much. You have changed my life for the better, and I someday hope that I can repay you for saving me