#I spent 3 hours making poses for this one scene

[allebasimaianunes]

"the boxer" ✴︎ drew starkey

one-short | fluffy & semi-smut

sumary: Drew is the model of a rising artist. He is not only her muse, but also her most passionate lover of her works.

autor's note: so, i saw this twitter here and i got kind of obsessed with the whole concept. i have this painting engraved in my mind, so i decided to write a little text with the scene that came to my mind, really quickly. it's not a big deal :) the painting is "the boxer" by russian painter kostantin andreevich somov (1869-1939).

warning contend: it's quite romantic to be honest. there's a hint of sex at the end, but i wanted to keep it light, erotic, and sentimental! english isn't my first language, so i apologize for the mistakes. oh, and here the reader is in the third person, with no description of physical characteristics. enjoy the reading! <3

word count: 1.795 words

language: eng.

soundtrank inspo: give you my love, mazzy star

“Please, be quiet.”

She asked with one of the brushes between her teeth, watching him intently. The blonde man, with tanned skin and a defined body, chuckled, amused by the painter's impatience, adjusting his position once again. It was exhausting to pose nude for hours on end, in the same exact pose, unable to move a single muscle so as not to disturb the meticulous painting the woman was creating.

Drew sighed, extending one of his hands forward as his gaze landed on the artist.

She was adding yellow paint to the details outlining the curves of his body. The room they were in was both her little bedroom, her studio, and her kitchen – a small cubicle painted in a sandy yellow, with a few rustic wooden furniture pieces she scavenged from shops here and there. The bed was nothing more than a single mattress on the floor, and her wardrobe consisted of large, square trunks typically used for train travel. Books on human anatomy were scattered alongside Walter Benjamin, Gramsci, Virginia Woolf, and Jean-Paul Sartre – books he devoured during idle moments. And there was an overwhelming amount of painting supplies – truly impressive. Paint tubes stacked in crates she collected from the market, brushes drying on the balcony, blank canvases leaning against the walls.

She spent more on art supplies than on food.

The man’s blue eyes fixed on the woman’s face: beautiful, angular, like a unique work of art. She looked exceptionally stunning when she was deeply focused on painting. In a swift motion, she removed the brush from between her teeth and used it to add the final blend to the painted face. She smiled, stepping back with measured steps from the canvas, placing her hands on her hips, satisfied with the result. Drew grew curious, wanting to leave his pose but knowing he had to stay still until she gave him instructions.

“This one is beautiful. Wow, I can’t believe I painted it!”

“If only I could look at it and give my opinion…” the man said sarcastically, glancing at her with pleading eyes, desperate to move. She rolled her eyes and nodded, signaling him to come see the result of five hours of posing. Naturally comfortable in his nude form, the man walked to the easel holding the canvas, briefly glancing at the window and noticing the sun setting on the horizon, casting warm orange and red hues across the sky.

He positioned himself behind the woman, his height making it easy to see the portrait. His eyes filled with pride and an overwhelming emotion as he saw himself depicted on the canvas. The way she captured the details of his relaxed expression, the movement in the outstretched hand, the defined body exposed in golden tones – it touched him deeply. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say he felt an odd urge to cry.

“Wow… This is perfect! You’re incredible.”

“Do you really think so?” she asked hesitantly, looking at him over her shoulder. The man moved closer, placing his hands on her tense shoulders, whispering, “I’m sure that when we sell this painting, buyers and curators will climax with excitement.”

“Drew…” she laughed, turning to face him, her eyes sparkling with joy at his praise. Smiling, he cupped her face tenderly, resting his forehead against hers. “I know I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again: you’re the best artist in this city! Actually, in the entire world!”

“Stop, you’re going to make me vain!”

“And rightfully so!” he retorted, both laughing. With gentle fingers, he tucked strands of her hair behind her ears, his gaze turning soft, studying every little detail of her.

He felt love consuming his chest like flames, recalling the moment she first approached him dressed in a suit and tie – several sizes too big for her – with a beret to hold her hair back, pretending to be a male gambler at his underground fights. She casually asked if he would accept a job in exchange for money. Of course, he agreed, assuming it would be some intimate encounter or collecting a debt with violence. When they arrived at her small sixth-floor apartment, he was surprised by its simplicity and the casual way she revealed herself to him.

His heart raced as she removed the beret, letting her long hair fall, and took off the blazer and trousers, leaving her in an oversized dress shirt. She lit a cigarette from her silver case, walked across the room to grab a canvas, and set up the easel near a chair facing the open balcony door. She gestured toward the chair. Still puzzled, he walked over, feeling self-conscious about his sweat, the bruises on his brow, and the cut on his lower lip-yet more so about his naïveté for not suspecting the stranger was, in fact, a woman.

While setting up to paint, it was Drew who broke the silence, his voice curious. “Why did you pretend to be a man? Wouldn’t it have been easier to approach me as… yourself?”

She glanced at him from behind the canvas, the cigarette dangling from her lips. “I wanted a fighter. And there are a lot of ignorant men in those places… I’ve always wanted to walk into a room full of men dressed as one of them, approach someone, and bring them back to my place to paint them. So I combined business with pleasure, and here you are.”

Drew raised an eyebrow, crossing his legs, intrigued by this strange, half-naked woman in front of him. “And you’re not afraid? Especially dressed like that in front of me… I’m a fighter. I’m strong,” she stepped out from behind the canvas-not backing away but moving closer to him. Her eyes locked with his as she finished his thought: “I could overpower you. Or something like that.”

“No. I’m not afraid of you, and you wouldn’t overpower me,” she said defiantly, smiling. Drew frowned, studying her intently as she pulled a pair of oval-framed glasses from his shirt pocket, placing them on his face. She crouched to pick up a book by the chair and handed it to him. “I watched you for weeks, considering you as my potential model, and I couldn’t help but notice how fake you are!” she laughed, lighting another cigarette.

Drew’s face twisted in offense. “Excuse me!? I don’t even know you, and you’re calling me out like this!? Who do you think you are? I swear, I’ll walk out and tell the first person I see that you’re insane-” He began to rise, but she casually extended a cigarette toward him.

Her gaze was calm and confident. That nonchalant, informal act caught him off guard. It disarmed him. Accepting the cigarette, he allowed her soft voice to explain: “Don’t be offended or mad. I did what anyone desperate for a chance in this world full of jerks would do: I took unconventional measures to make my mark. I needed a model with your features, someone unique and unknown. That way, if I could convince you to be my model, I could pose as you to sell my work. Because, ever since I left my studies, I’ve had zero validation as a woman artist. You get it?”

Drew took a drag, his eyes fixed on hers. Thoughts swirled in his mind – it was an unexpected proposal. After a decade of his mediocre life as a boxer, competing in small matches for meager earnings with blood, sweat, and pain, her offer lit a spark in his mind. Intrigued, he asked, “So, how would this work… you pretending to be me?”

She smiled, satisfied – a smile he would come to know intimately over the months that followed, as they sealed their deal with a handshake, a gaze filled with mutual ambition, and cigarettes smoked into the evening as she sketched a new canvas.

Their partnership flourished. She had the talent, and he had the image coveted by curators and collectors. While she worked from the shadows, he basked in the spotlight.

Their inevitable closeness culminated in a private celebration after a major sale – a stunning bust of Drew with his torso exposed and a vacant, majestic expression. That night, in her cramped apartment, amid whiskey and wine, their bodies intertwined, the lines between them blurred, and passion erupted in a tangle of sweat and ecstasy.

Drew was hopelessly in love with her, and he wanted her to know. Yet, he hadn’t found the right words – until that sublime moment, gazing at the portrait of himself as he turned to her and whispered: “I’m losing my mind over you, woman!”

“Oh, my God…” she said, surprised, her paint-stained hands holding his. He didn’t mind—in fact, he felt her touch was akin to being painted into her masterpieces. Drew smiled sincerely, kissing her tenderly.

The kiss was returned with a sublime tenderness and love. Their bodies moved through the room in a dance, his firm hands guiding her to the mattress, gently pushing her onto it. Standing over her in his unashamed nudity, bathed in the warm glow of the sunset, her gaze shifted with a mix of carnal desire and passion. She whispered, “Darling, you truly are a masterpiece. My masterpiece.”

Drew’s smile brimmed with passion as he lay over her, planting kisses full of emotion. Through their intimacy, he felt her unspoken love, her hands painting his body with her touch, just as she would a canvas. Drew smiled passionately, lying on top of her and distributing kisses full of feelings, feeling in her mouth the words of love and passion that she did not say to him verbally, feeling in the way she slid her hands over his body as she drew it, exploring her body like a picture critic captures every detail in a painting. Eyes, nose, lips, neck, chest, breasts, abdomen, mons pubis, thighs. Returning to between her legs, the wet and sensitive intimacy. The moans mixing with the noise of the city outside, the pleading whispers, the peak that made her shiver. With his breathing so heavy, almost unable to contain himself, losing himself in her was a delirium in itself. Penetrating as if he could dye her soul with himself, the man crossed his hands before cumming, dragging out a deep, lazy “I love you.”, full of honey and golden colors in her ear.

As night fell, cloaking the drying canvas on the balcony in an indigo veil, they lay entwined on the mattress, bodies glistening and breaths heavy. Drew smiled, brushing a strand of hair from her beautiful face and murmured, “If I’m your masterpiece, then let me be eternally etched in your eyes. My creator.”

He leaned in, sealing the words I love you onto her soul with a kiss.

[songmingisthighs]

Kitty Baby Princess

group : ateez

pairing : bf!mingi × reader

genre : smut, relationship

wc : 6.4 k

warning : possessive!mingi, unprotected sex (wrap it up to prevent an oopsie), slight voyeurism, panty giving, sniffing, and licking (literally one scene), sleazy-ish san making an appearance, switch!mingi, kinda rough sex ??, freaky shit, nasty language, cumming untouched, slight degradation ? (m receiving) I truly blame @byuntrash101 for turning me into this kind of a person. idk what to tag here anymore this fic is debauchery. lmk if i should add anymore warnings thanxx

a/n : THANK YOU @byuntrash101 FOR GIVING ME THIS IDEA FROM THIS >:D and ofc for letting me run with it <3 i hope you suffer as bad as me thanxx and i admit i kinda went overboard with this? but like... it's mingi ?? and i wanna do the original hc justice

a/n/n : i spent 7.5 hours on this mostly because i procrastinated bc it was 12.30 fucking am and it's 8.06 am rn i hath nawt slept yet. I hope this fic make sense tho, i hate to see this as a fail so pls lmk where i messed up

buy me coffee ?

Mingi was starting to think that inviting you to dinner was a bad idea.

It's not that he doesn't love having you around because God, he wished you'd just move in with him. It's not that you don't fit in with his friends because WooSan has made you an honorary dumbass trio which caused Seonghwa to pop a vein. And it's not because you didn't know how to dress up because you absolutely do. Which was the main reason anyways because Mingi kept eyeing you from the couch like a lion preparing to pounce on his prey but as much as he wanted to fuck you in the middle of the room, he didn't know if you'd be open to that.

So he sat by himself, biting his bottom lip while his eyes devoured your whole being. You, who were not even doing anything but stand near the dining area talking to San and Seonghwa with your short skirt and frilly sleeves. On one side, Mingi would like to do nothing but rip every bit of stupid fabric off of you in one tear because how dare they cover you up from his sight? But on the other side, he wanted to appreciate how pretty and delicate and absolutely ethereal you look in mundane clothing. When Mingi's tongue darted across his lips, he could almost imagine how you would taste and the sounds you would make. He had made you sit on his face so many times that the taste of you will forever be embedded in his tastebuds and mind. Just the thought of eating you out in that stupid, stupid skirt made him clench his jaws tightly.

Mingi might think that he's so slick, but in reality, you've been feeling his gaze on you since the moment you detached yourself from his lap and went over to talk to Seonghwa and San. Mingi is rather straightforward when it comes to you and what he wants (so technically you) and even when he wanted to play his feelings off, you knew him better than that. So the whole time you talked with San and Seonghwa, you have been intentionally striking poses that will allow Mingi to get a flash of your skimpy underwear or poses that will accentuate your figure be it your ass or boobs. Mingi, God bless him, loves you for whatever you had to offer him. When asked by Wooyoung whether he was an ass or boob man, Mingi literally said "I'm a (y/n) man," and you made sure to reward him that night by letting him overstimulate you to the point of crying and cockwarm you through the night and wake you up with a rough pounding. Safe to say that was the first time you said I love you to him (his was the first time you went down on him). Not to be a total attention whore, but you loved knowing that Mingi had his attention completely on you even when you two were not in close proximity. It was as if the two of you owned the world and the others were mere decorations.

When San and Seonghwa excused themselves to go get the delivery food that arrived in the middle of San telling you Wooyoung's latest prank attempt that almost resulted in their fridge almost breaking down, you made your way to your boyfriend whose smoulder melted into an adorable pout. You chuckled at the sight and let your body fell into his opened arms with your knees trapping his left thigh and your thigh that was between Mingi's legs rested so close to his crotch. Upon impact, Mingi immediately wrapped his arms around your body, resting his chin rest on your chest as he looked up at you, "Tell me why we can't bail this dinner and just hole ourselves in my room and fuck?" he whined, hands travelling under your skirt to cup your asscheeks in his big and warm hands. Your eyes widened at the sudden gesture and your head immediately shot to where San and Seonghwa were, making sure they didn't see you in such a position. Looking back at your boyfriend, your hand slapped his shoulder as his hands found their way inside your panties to caress the soft skin of the flesh he liked to spank during sex. "May I remind you that you invited me for DINNER and not sex?" you pointed out, lips threatening to curl into a smile at the feeling of Mingi oh so affectionately stroking your ass. Mingi groaned and buried his face between your chest, "You MAY remind me, doesn't mean I have to like it," he grumbled, suddenly biting on the inside of your clothed breast, forcing a yelp out of you.

Sometimes you wondered how you could be so soft for your giant hunk of a boyfriend. Sure, he's tall, muscular, big, and big, but he's your baby just as much as you are his, or maybe even more. You couldn't help but feel bad at his use of dejected voice and you really were planning on staying the night over anyways. So you decided to give him something to hold on to. Literally.

Looking at where Seonghwa and San were (still making sure that the restaurant got their order because your carnivore of a boyfriend and his roommates are very particular about their food) just in case, you pushed yourself slightly back which confused Mingi. He was about to ask what you were doing when you suddenly turned around so your ass was facing him and bent down. The sight of your panties got Mingi's jaw to drop and when you pull them down to reveal your bare cunt, Mingi's mouth immediately felt dry. With eyes glued to the folds where he usually buried his face, Mingi's tongue automatically slipped between his lips and he leaned forward to get a taste. Much to his disappointment, however, you grabbed your panties and turned around. "What are you doing?" you asked with a raised eyebrow. "What are YOU doing presenting yourself to me like that? Now come on, let me get a taste," he whined, grabbing your hips and flipping your skirt up to expose your bare cunt to his eyes. You let out a yelp of surprise when he got close to actually burying his face between your legs. Extreme measures had to be taken so you reached for his throat and pressed on his jugular enough that he choked slightly, allowing you to push him back against the couch, "You are not about to eat me out in the middle of the living room where your friends could see us, you hear me?" The way you sounded so serious and the pressure you put on his throat managed to make Mingi's head spin a little, loving how you took over. You retracted your hand to allow air back into Mingi's lungs, holding yourself back from mauling him from the way his eyes fluttered. You just know that he was getting so aroused.

While Mingi was distracted, you slipped your panties into his palm and leaned close as you heard Seonghwa and San walking back slowly with food. "Something for you to hold onto until after dinner," you said before giving him a soft peck on his cheek and retreating to help Seonghwa and San with the food. It took Mingi a couple of seconds to realize that you were no longer on top of him and just as he was about to be disappointed, he noticed your frilly panties in his hand and he perked up. His head snapped to look for you, giddiness evident in his eyes. You were taking the food out of the plastic bag when you noticed Mingi grinning widely at you, a sight that made you smile to yourself. That smile fell however when Mingi blatantly dangled your panties in front of his face for him to take a big whiff, making a whole show of fluttering his eyelids and rolling his eyes to the back of his head. Your face reddened immediately and you would've screamed had Seonghwa and San seen what Mingi did which thankfully they didn't because San had his back to Mingi and Seonghwa was in the kitchen.

Trying to be as discreet as you could, you gestured for Mingi to stop doing what he was doing but much to your dismay, the man spread your panties in his large hand and stuck his tongue out. You knew where that was going but when Mingi actually took a fat stripe on the spot that made contact with your pussy, your knees almost buckled and you were sure that your face was burning so hot, smoke should be coming out of your ears. It was a miracle San didn't realize what was happening.

Thankfully, Mingi immediately shoved the panties into his pants when Seonghwa called him out for dinner. Yes, he shoved it INSIDE his pants so that his cock wouldn't miss your cunt so much, or so he told you when he whispered directly into your ears as he pulled your chair like a gentleman. Gentleman my ass. What kind of gentleman shoved his hand inside your skirt as he made conversation with his dormmates? What kind of gentleman trace the slit of your pussy as he asked you how you were? What kind of a gentleman stuck one of his fingers between your folds when he pretended to reach over you to get a side dish? Freaky bastard. Nevertheless, the same bastard that made you clench your thighs as you silently hoped your arousal wouldn't stain the cushioned chair. It was bad enough that he was teasing you, but Seonghwa was sitting across him and San was across you, they could've easily seen what Mingi was doing and based on how you were biting your lips, they could've easily made an assumption on what was going on.

You decided that you might want to get some revenge on Mingi. The more he touched you under the table, the bigger your desire grew for him to have a taste of his own medicine. Your opportunity came when Seonghwa said he had prepared dessert for you after knowing that you would be joining them for dinner. Of course, as a polite guest, you offered to help him which means Mingi's hand had to momentarily part with your cunt. But of course, to tease you, Mingi stuck his slick-covered fingers into his mouth as he made eye contact with you, smirking when your eyes once again widened. This time, San noticed the interaction between you two, however, staring confusedly with an eyebrow raised but not saying anything, not even to point the behaviour out.

As you moved around the kitchen with Seonghwa, you made sure to sway your hips as sensually as you can, knowing that your boyfriend was staring at your ass the whole time. It wasn't like he was being subtle about it anyway, you saw how hard he was biting into his chopsticks, he could've bent them easily. Too focused on teasing your horny boyfriend, you almost forgot where you were and what you were doing and it made you clumsy as seen by how you accidentally dropped the spoon Seonghwa handed over to you before he reached for the plates in the cupboard. "Whoops!" you said, bending down to grab the utensils on the floor as you flash your boyfriend your bare, glistening cunt. The sight was enough to elicit a groan out of Mingi which was caught by San, thinking that his friend was hurting. But when San saw that Mingi was staring at something, he instinctively turned to look at what Mingi was looking at too which was a bad idea because he hadn't planned on seeing one of his best friends's girlfriend's pussy on full display. His eyes widened in shock and he so wanted to tear his eyes off but he couldn't, he couldn't even help but be affected, suddenly very aware of the fabric of his underwear that rubbed against his cock when he started shifting around in his seat.

"(y/n)?" San called out mindlessly, surprising you enough to the point that you immediately stood up and turned around. Mingi's daze was also broken when San called out to you and it didn't have to take a damn genius to deduct the fact that San totally saw your pussy, it was all over his face; the shame, the blush, and if you look closer, the way he started to uncomfortably tug on his pants. The three of you stayed in your positions, frozen, not knowing what to do or say while Seonghwa remained oblivious.

You were damn embarrassed to have been caught in that position, flaunting your princess parts (or so Mingi calls your pussy) to your boyfriend's dormmate. Despite it being an accident, the shame was still very much real. You couldn't even dare yourself to look up, not even when Seonghwa asked about the cake he bought. You managed to play it off as you inspected the cake, making up crap on the spot to justify your not looking him in the eyes as you talked to him. What were you supposed to do? You didn't know what to do if San was looking at you which he so totally was and Mingi witnessed all this. He saw how San was sneaking glances at you as his cheeks were tinted red. What caught Mingi's interest was that the blush and San's mannerisms didn't show shame, it didn't even show that he was sorry for even seeing you in such a state, heck, not even disturbance. It was the shade and mannerisms of a man who was appreciating someone in a sexual manner. Mingi didn't like that, Mingi didn't like that one bit. He had hoped that by putting a hand on your thigh San would stop his stare and obvious intrigue but of course, that did nothing.

"You know hyung, I think this cake is great, it's sweet but it's not so sweet," Mingi stated after having a spoonful of cake. "Oh? I think this cake is on the sweeter side," Seonghwa said, raising an eyebrow and trying another bite. Mingi shrugged as he finished his cake, "I don't think so because nothing is as sweet as my (y/n) here," he made a point of winking at you before staring at San in triumph. But much to his surprise, San didn't bat an eye, he wasn't threatened. Heck, he had a look of intrigue and knowing his friend, Mingi realized his mistake of calling you sweet. He was willing to bet his gaming setup that San was totally thinking about how your pussy must've tasted.

Luckily dinner came to an end rather quickly because Seonghwa had to rush out to deal with a Hongjoong emergency (aka Hongjoong had just started unpacking the last of his boxes after moving into the new dorm MONTHS after). There were four of you left alone in the dorm; you, Mingi, San, and damn awkward silence.

"Well," Mingi coughed as he grabbed his dishes from the table ever so slowly so he could get his brain to create some kind of excuse. San stood up while shaking his head furiously, "No, no, you... You leave the dishes to me, I'll take care of them tonight and you can take over my turn next time," San said, smiling to his friend though the smile didn't reach his eyes. Nor was it his usual smile, it seemed rather restricted. Surprised, Mingi blinked confusedly at San, "Uh... It's okay, I can-" "No, you should spend time with your girlfriend. Think of it as me doing you a favour," San cut him off, shifting his eyes at you who was already looking at him with wide eyes. For a moment, San was reminded of the image of your cunt to which he immediately shake his head to erase the image from his head as if he was an etch-a-sketch. Unfortunately for him, he wasn't quick enough as Mingi caught the look on San's face and he could feel his blood boil, hating the idea of his friend thinking about his baby's princess parts.

Abruptly, Mingi tugged your arm to stand up, "Thank man, I'll be sure to do you a favour next time," he smiled curtly, wanting to leave the dining area immediately to get some damn privacy. San wasn't surprised that Mingi acted as such because the behaviour was very much similar to the time Wooyoung talked about your tits after a trip to the waterpark. San was just hoping that Mingi wouldn't superglue his mouse to his mousepad before an important game.

Figuring that you were in the clear, you moved to follow Mingi, bidding San a good night and telling him that you had a good time out of sheer politeness. Seeing as you were interacting with him again, San stopped you by calling you, making you turn around while your boyfriend waited by the hallway that led to his room. "I-I," San had to clear his throat, acknowledging that what he wanted to say was rather embarrassing. But he swallowed his shyness and just gave you a smile, "I-I'm sorry for what happened earlier, I didn't mean to look at..." He trailed off as he gestured to your body awkwardly. While you were mortified that he brought up the topic again, you were glad that he didn't explicitly said what he did. Thinking that the situation had passed anyway, you smiled back and shook your head, "No worries San, it was an honest mistake," you assured him.

"For what it's worth," Just as you were about to join your boyfriend, San made you halt your steps once again. You tilted your head slightly which made Mingi feel irked because you were paying his friend too much attention for his liking especially considering the fact that the particular friend had seen something he shouldn't and that Mingi was needy. "You had nothing to be ashamed about, you have a very pretty... Kitty..." San said, not realizing that he had glanced lower at your body and even let his tongue dart out slightly to lick his bottom lip before looking at you straight in the eyes again, "Mingi is indeed a very lucky guy just as we all have said. But tonight I got a confirmation."

You couldn't even answer San when Mingi pulled you into his arms and shielded you away from his apparently sleazy-adjacent friend, "Thanks man but she knows I'm so lucky to have her," he said through gritted teeth. Now he's absolutely pissed.

In a flash, you were tossed onto the bed in Mingi's room. Your body bounced slightly and while you were still in a daze of surprise, Mingi crawled on top of you. "How fucking dare you," he growled, diving down to capture your lips in a desperate kiss. You yelped slightly when Mingi shoved his tongue in your mouth out of the blue. Though he looked pissed because his face looked pissed and he's 6 ft tall with the proclivity to wear anything and everything dark, his kiss showed his real emotion. "Does he not think I already know that I'm so lucky you let me love you?" he whimpered into your mouth when your hands grabbed the hair on the back of his head. "Baby, you know how much I appreciate you for letting me love you, right?" he asked as he pulled away. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of his reddened pouty lips and hazy eyes looking at you, seeking for your approval. You lifted your body slightly with one arm as the other went to cup his chin between your thumb and index finger, letting your thumb swipe his puffy bottom lip that was glistening in your mixed spit, "Of course baby. You're my Minnie Minnie Mingi, you're the only man I allow to touch me however you want," you then leaned closer to blow directly to his ear, making him visibly shudder, "You're the only man I allow anywhere near my princess parts," when you bit down to his ear lobe, Mingi's arms buckled slightly and his eyes rolled to the back of his head while his cock strained against his pants.

You pulled back slightly and pouted at him, "And... Didn't you say you wanted to have a taste of me?" you batted your lashes at him. That absolutely wrecked Mingi's resolve because in one swift movement, he had pushed you all the way to his headboard while opening your legs widely. When Mingi was face to face with your glistening, pulsating cunt, he couldn't help but stare at it while biting his bottom lip, momentarily appreciating it in all its glory. While it technically was rather embarrassing to have your pussy be stared at like that, it was a regular occurrence for you and you knew you had nothing to be ashamed or shy about. How can you? Mingi worshipped the ground you walk on and it made you feel like a goddess. "Still so fucking wet for me," he said to himself as he swiped two of his fingers on the mess of the wetness. Due to not wearing panties and rubbing your legs together the whole night, your arousal was spread everywhere. While Mingi was very possessive of you, oftentimes saying how he didn't want to waste a single drop of your princess nectar, the sight of the glistening even glittering mess was a sight to behold to him.

"Fuck baby, how can your pussy look and taste even more delicious than that damn cake?" was the last thing Mingi said before he attached his lips to your cunt, eliciting a gasp from you.

Mingi took his time eating you out, truly devouring you whole and enjoying every single second of it. To say that Mingi was obsessed with your pussy was an understatement. It seemed like he knew your body better than yours because he understood what every tic, squirm, moan, and arch of the back meant. He knew that you loved how he use his tongue to trace shapes on you and rather than simply flick and nibble on your clit, you love how he use his nose to bump into it. You had even joked that you knew that Mingi was perfect for you due to his pointy nose. No matter how much you love him bumping his nose on your clit, it can't beat how much he absolutely go batshit crazy when you use his nose to get off when you sit on his face. Just the thought got him grinding his hips on the bed. Seeing this, you grabbed Mingi's hair and pulled his face back, causing him to whine. "Did you just hump your bed? I thought I was the only thing your cock wants to make contact with?" you huffed, pouting at him though only meaning it half-heartedly. Mingi shook his head slightly to loosen your grip on his hair before he leaned his head on the junction of your thigh, peppering kisses on the outer lip of your pussy. "Sorry, I can't help but imagine fucking this pussy... My baby's pussy... My baby's pretty pretty pussy," he moaned before engulfing your cunt once more. Though his mouth was busy pleasuring you, his eyes never left your face. He loved the way your face contorted into pleasure when his tongue breached your hole to gather your slick and push it up to your clit as a lubricant so his nose could move more seamlessly. The intensity of your reaction was what got him excited but the knowledge that he was the one who was doing those things to you was what got him addicted. The best part for Mingi though was when you grabbed his hair to fuck yourself on his face. Your hips went wild to chase the kind of pleasure only he could give. When you use him like that, Mingi feels like he is nothing but a toy you used to get off and he feels honoured above anything else.

Just as Mingi was enjoying the feeling of your arousal down his chin while his tongue was fucking you, your hips stopped moving. Mingi was too into his headspace that he initially didn't notice your halted movements, in fact, his mouth only moved on its own automatically, lapping your juice as he flicked, nibbled, and nudged on the sensitive nub. "Baby," you whined out loud, forcing Mingi to slip out of his headspace momentarily to reply with a low hum as his tongue was busy gathering every last drop of you. "I don't wanna cum on your tongue tonight, I wanna cum on your fat cock. I wanna cum while I ride you," you whined, bordering on begging.

Hearing that you wanted to ride him, Mingi pulled away from your cunt with a smirk, "Oh? My princess wants to ride me using her... What did San called it? Your kitty?" he chuckled mockingly. You whined and kicked your legs slightly, embarrassed that he used such language at you and especially using his friend's words on you. Slowly, erotically, Mingi climbed over your body whilst slowly pulling your top off and shoving it down your waist, "If I feed the kitty my cock, will it purr?" he asked as he leaned down to suck a mark in the middle of your chest. "Can the kitty even take my cock, baby? Can my baby's kitty princess part take my load when I cum inside?" you looked down to see his lips wrapped around your right nipple, "Remember when we had sex the first time? Remember how your pussy can't take me? I barely hung onto my sanity that time because I wanted to make you mine but I had to be gentle. I don't think I can be gentle this time," he pouted, leaving your nipple to leave a string of his spit that later dripped down your stomach. Wanting his cock inside you immediately, you nodded frantically, "Yes! Yes! My pussy is already perfectly moulded to take you, Mingi, please, I will ride you so good, I want your cum in me," your hands were wrapped around his neck tightly as you tried to ground up to his hips, wanting to feel his cock on you immediately.

Luckily Mingi couldn't say no to you especially when you became that whiny for him. It was endearing, really.

With steady hands, Mingi flipped you both over so you were straddling his hips. You leaned back on your arms to stare at the bulge straining against its confines between Mingi's legs with a twinkle in your eyes. You knew what was under his trousers, you've seen it multiple times but it never gets old; the excitement of seeing it strain and then pop up like jack-in-a-box. Well, in Mingi's case, it's jacking into a cunt. But it works. Whenever you are presented with the opportunity to undress Mingi, it always feels like opening a present because it actually feels like a present. How can it not? It's only for you and you get to play with it Mingi always lets you take your time with him as he gets to experience the joy of seeing you thrilled just from seeing him.

Slowly, you unbuttoned his pants and when you unzipped his pants, pulling them down just past the midsection of his thick thighs without bothering to take them off completely, you were shocked to see your panties still there. "Mingi!" you exclaimed as you pulled the frilly, flimsy garment like a magician because as soon as the panty was pulled, Mingi's cock popped up tall, spurting some precum on your thigh. Scratch that, soiled frilly, flimsy garment. Your eyes were wide in surprise and wonder, fascinated with how much cum there actually was and excited with the thought that the same amount of cum would be inside you momentarily. Perhaps more.

Mingi looked away in embarrassment when you showed him your panties, completely forgetting that it was there in the first place. With his arms crossed on his still-clothed chest, Mingi pouted and mumbled out an explanation. "It was all your fault for giving me your panties and letting me play with your pussy during dinner, and then to make shit worse, you flashed me your entire pussy when you know I want to bury myself in it 24/7. That's why I came," his cheeks were red which showcased his embarrassment even more but you couldn't understand why he would be embarrassed for cumming from his own girlfriend's teasing. So you cooed at him as you reached to cup his face, urging him to face you, "Aww, baby you don't need to be embarrassed for cumming in your pants like that. I find it absolutely adorable and it's a great ego boost to know that you were so affected by me," you said as you peppered kisses down his jaw. Mingi's embarrassment slowly faded when you told him you liked how affected he was by you. "Really?" he asked, looking at you who were now trailing kisses up his toned stomach as you pulled his shirt off. Nodding, you didn't let your lips stop their path up to Mingi's nipples, "Of course, sweetie. How can I not love the thought of my baby so infatuated by me?" you smiled against his skin.

All of a sudden, Mingi pulled you up so your face was right in front of his. Inhaling the scent of you sharply, Mingi let out a shuddered exhale before speaking out, "Well, you need to remember that this baby needs to have his cock impaling your pussy, so please, please, pretty please fuck yourself on me."

Finally, after so many back and forth between you two, you moved to position your opening above Mingi's awaiting cock after giving him a soft peck on his lips. You knew Mingi loved seeing himself fill you up and you can't disappoint him so you leaned back and opened your legs to hug his hips perfectly with his tip pressing on your cunt. The heavy tip already provided a thrilling stimulation that got you biting back a squeal. Without warning, you lowered your hips so that Mingi's cock would enter you slowly. Mingi was watching how his cock filled you up very closely with his jaw hanging open due to the warmth your cunt provided. His hand reached to part your pussy lips apart so he could see better, not realizing that you had thrown your head back from the additional pressure he accidentally gave to your pussy. "F-fuck," you whimpered, thighs trembling as you finally got all of Mingi inside you. Even after having sex with him (or the more often making love sessions), you still needed time to adjust to him first before actually jumping into action. Mingi hated seeing you struggle no matter what came after that, so to help you, he gently stroked your thighs with his large and warm hands, "I'm sorry that I'm too big," he pouted. To some, it might sound like a brag, but it truly wasn't and thankfully you knew that.

Copying his expression, you pushed yourself to wrap your arms around Mingi's neck loosely and gave him a small smile, "Why are you apologizing? I love your big, fat cock that got me drooling just from the thought of it," you gave an experimental movement by pulling your hips up to see how he would feel only to find nothing but pleasure that was accompanied by a slight pressure. "I love how you could fill me up for days with your stupid extra large cock," you lowered yourself again until your hips met again and Mingi moaned loudly as he threw his head back, "F-fuck yes! My cock is stupid! It's so so stupid for filling you up so good." Tilting your head to the side, you brought Mingi's face back to yours again, "But do you know what I love most about you?" Somehow Mingi managed to look both sexy and innocent when he shook his head, wanting to hear your answer so obediently. "I love the feeling of your cum being dumped inside me because that's how you truly make me yours, you left a part of you in me and I love it beyond anything else."

At the first roll of your hips, Mingi grunted and let his head fall on your shoulder, wanting to keep you close. But you had another plan which involved him laying on his back on the bed. So you pushed him down by his chest which earned you a whine from the giant of a man but you immediately pressed a finger on his lips, "I'm in charge now and I want you lying there on your back looking pretty while I use your dumb cock." Mingi would've protested had it not for the way you started fucking yourself on his cock with your knees trapping his hips as an anchor for your movements. Sure, Mingi loved fucking you into his bed or making love to you under his sheet on a rainy morning, but this? You taking control over him while being on top? It makes him feel like a king while still being doted on. "You love riding your lover, don't you?" Mingi teased as he moaned, loving how tight you were gripping him. "I do, baby, I so fucking do!" It didn't come as a surprise that you let out a loud moan. You both were very vocal in bed what with Mingi's tease and begs and the praises you gave your boyfriend.

What you didn't take into account was the fact that the door to Mingi's room was never closed. So it shouldn't come as a surprise when San walked past the room only to halt in his tracks, getting the second surprise of the day. San felt like he should say something, but considering how you reacted to him seeing your pussy, San felt like he had to tread carefully. How? No clue, eyes busy looking, brain malfunctioning.

You were so caught up with bouncing on top of Mingi to take notice of your guest. Your whole sense was filled with Mingi and it was just so addicting. On the other hand, Mingi noticed San as soon as the man walked by, having the advantage of facing the doorway. While Mingi as a boyfriend is the type to get jealous and very possessive if he found anyone eyeing what is his, Mingi as a lover has no problem reminding people who you belong to, what it takes to satisfy you, and who was the only person who could do it. Mingi couldn't help but think that it was the perfect opportunity to send a message to San. So he sat himself straight and pulled your body close to his so your chests were pressing together. The sudden movement made Mingi's cock hit a different spot in you, the spot that had you squealing Mingi's name as the muscles of your thighs constrict,

"Aww poor baby, let me take over for you, love," he said sweetly to your ear as he eyed San carefully. San should've run to his room, put on his headphones and blasted something loud but he couldn't, he couldn't stop looking at how his best friend's body was tangled with his lover so intricately, so intimately.

Mingi simply wrapped an arm around your shoulders as the other was anchored on his side while his feet spread slightly and were planted firmly. The way Mingi began thrusting into you was something you couldn't replicate. His pace was fast but his movement was precise, it was rather animalistic and painfully addicting. Your head lolled to rest on the side of his neck as your arms wrapped tightly around his broad shoulders, moans spilling out of your mouth incoherently. "Tell me baby, who's making you feel this good?" Mingi asked, eyes maintaining contact with San's, "You! You! You, Mingi! You!" you moaned whimpering when he managed to find your g-spot, causing your legs to snap shut which signalled Mingi that that's where he should be hitting. With precision, Mingi started hitting your g-spot continuously without his speed ever faltering. "Louder! I want everyone to know who you belong to! Who your pussy belongs to!" Mingi smirked when he saw San's eyes widen. "You, Song Mingi! You're the only person w-who- Ah! Who ca-can fuck me l-like this! My body, my pussy, belongs to you, my love, I belong to you!" you cried out pathetically, completely oblivious to the fact that San was listening in the whole time.

It didn't take long for either of you to reach your climax what with being sensitive and having to hold off sex since dinner. You were still sensitive from the way Mingi ate you out so when Mingi began thrusting into you at a bruising strength, you found yourself biting down on Mingi's shoulder, ensuring that a mark would be left behind there. The impact from your bite sent Mingi reeling, with his hips halfway into a thrust, his thighs shook as his ass clenched, cumming hard inside you, painting your insides with his seed. "That's it baby, make me yours. Fill me up so I'm filled with nothing but you," you babbled as your hand reached to stroke Mingis's hair. Mingi's thighs were still trembling slightly as he emptied himself inside of you but at least he was seated down and his body was able to relax slightly, leaning his own head on yours as his grip on your waist remained. The moment felt so intimate that San scurried away to hole himself up in his room. Mingi could only imagine that San was jacking off to him and you fucking, San should only be so lucky to have witnessed not only Mingi's treasure (your cunt) but also the way Mingi made his claim on you.

As you both came down from your high, you remained in your position, not wanting to be separated just yet as you find the other very comforting. Mingi was stroking the skin of your lower back with his eyes closed, enjoying the praises you whispered to him whilst peppering kisses on the skin of his shoulder.

He was content then, being in his own space with the love of his life.

Especially after letting someone who crossed a boundary witness Mingi claiming what is his. Not that Mingi would mind teaching him another lesson.

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[hazelvrr]

Chapter 1: The fair

S/n: As promised here's chapter 1, let me know if I should continue with this fic as I've never written a full fic before so I might be rubbish, also it's not proofread but any mistakes should only be minor. No use of y/n. I tried to capture their personalities to the best of my ability but they are so funny that they're also extremely difficult to write. I tried to not repeat any scenes from the movie, they still happen unless I mention them differently but I didn't want to sound like a broken record.

Summary: you get ready with pj and josie for the fair and they question your friendship with hazel and then you see her at the fair.

Warnings: none

Word count: 2.1k

-------------------------------------------------------

The fair was the one thing you looked forward to at the end of summer. Pretty much everything else about summer ending absolutely sucked but at least there was the fair.

Every year as soon as August rolled around, you were counting down the days until you could ride the ferris wheel, get cotton candy and most importantly, see hazel for the first time in 3 months.

Your 'best friend' hazel, if you could even call her that, volunteered at some charity or association of some sort all summer every single year without fail, so you couldn't see her for 3 months straight, which always drove you crazy.

You weren't quite sure why, after all, it was the same with pj and josie because they were away at some abstinence camp for the youth or as pj called it 'an anti sex cult run by a bunch of jealous old nuns who dont get any and are trying to ruin her life because shes hot as fuck' (her words, not yours) so you didn't see them either but you couldn't care less, so why were you so bothered about not seeing hazel?

Either way, you were super exited about this year's fair and had decided to get a ride from josie (only because you were embarrassed to tell anyone cool that you had failed your drivers test 5 times over the summer and had acctually managed to get yourself banned from the local dmv from 'assaulting your driving instructor' which you only did because he totally had it in for you) so naturally you thought it was a good idea to get ready at her house with her and pj.

BIG MISTAKE.

You should have known that pj and Josie, being the horny pervs that they are, spent the whole evening scheming about getting the cheerleaders attention, and how they were planning on getting possibly the straightest teenage girls you had ever seen in your whole life to fall head over heels for them.

Absolute losers.

You were so used to their antics that your brain had completely tuned them out as you applied your eyeliner, sitting beside pj, faces pushing eachother out of the way to fight to look in the tiniest mirror on josies desk.

You had stopped listening after josie had started ranting about the size of Jeff's penis, you were planning on stuffing your face with corndogs in less than an hour, and that was really putting you off the idea, that was until you heard josie say your name.

"Soo, have you spoken to hazel since school ended?"

Pj looks over at you with a shit eating grin on her face, "what she means to say is, have the two of you fucked yet?"

You roll your eyes at pj, not even dignifying her with an answer and turn your head to face josie, who was now stacking snapbacks on her head whilst looking in the mirror.

"To answer your question, yeah we've facetimed a few times and texted a lot."

"Oooo phone sex," pj giggles, "kinky."

You just flick pj in the head and begin applying your lipgloss.

Josie picks up one of the snapbacks from the floor and launches it at pjs head and instead misses and knocks over the mirror.

"Dude what the fuck." Pj hisses, standing up to go over to josies closet door to look at her outfit in the full length mirror, posing and checking herself out.

"Seriously though, when are you going to make a move?" Josie asks, backing away from pj and going to sit on the bed.

You look at her with a confused expression, "what do you mean, we're just friends."

Josie cocks her eyebrow and smirks, "please, you've been in love with her since 5th grade, you know it, I know it, pj knows it, pretty much everyone in a 10 mile radius can see it, except for hazel herself since she's an oblivious dork, but that's besides the point."

You go to answer but pj comes back over and sits back down next to you and you take the opportunity to escape and use the bathroom.

You take your time in there staring into the glass, turning your body around, checking that your hair is straight, your makeup looks good in natural lighting, oh and that your cleavage is poking through your tank top just enough, for no particular reason other than looking hot for yourself (well, that's what you told yourself anyways).

As you open the bathroom door to return to josies bedroom you hear pj and josie whispering, and being as nosy as you are, you press your ear up against the door to listen to what they're saying.

"Shhh she's gonna hear you" josie hushes.

"Shut up no she's not, that bitch couldn't hear a rocket land if it landed on the roof."

"How much did you say you wanna bet again?"

"50 bucks. If by the end of the school year they haven't fucked, I owe you 50 bucks, but if they have, you owe me 100."

"How the fuck does that work, why do I owe you double?"

"Because I'm fucking awesome... okay because I'm broke as hell and am gonna need the contribution for my homecoming dress so I can look sexy for brittany, duh."

"Yeah yeah whatever, its a deal, I think she's coming."

You once again roll your eyes at how pathetic they are. You swear to god that if you spent any more time with them than you already do, your eyes would permanently be fixed in the back of your head.

"Hey guys, you ready to go it's almost 8," you suggest as you open the door, "josie, what the hell do you think you're wearing?!"

"What do you mean?" She looks down confused at her spiritual playboy shirt, 5 carabiners hooked onto her pants' belt loops and her arm sling on her right arm.

"You look like dyke throw-up," pj cackles, standing up from the desk and following you both out of the bedroom door.

Josie looks back at pj as you're all walking down the stairs, "pj you can't say anything, look at you, you've got suspenders over your nipples like a goddamn freak."

Pj flips her off from behind her head and you can't help but giggle as you follow them out to the car and hop in the backseat.

"How'd you break your arm again josie?" You lean forward and ask as josie turns the keys and reverses out of her driveway.

"She flunked out of anti horny camp and fell out of her bunk rubbing one out," pj replies casually, looking down at her phone that displays brittanys Instagram posts from the summer, "fuck, she got even hotter over summer, how's that even possible?"

"Is isabel in any of the photos?" Josie questioned desperately, sneaking a peak down at pjs phone as she pulls up to a red light.

"God you're both pathetic."

You finally arrive to the fair, granted you're 20 minutes late because josie circled the parking lot at least 10 times as pj yelled at her to just fucking park, but josie wanted to make sure she could find a big enough spot.

You hand over your tickets and walk in, they're both muttering about something or other but you're not really listening, you're just scanning for hazel until you feel a tap on your shoulder and nearly jump out of your skin.

"Hey guys," hazel smiles, bringing you in for a hug, "long time no see, wait.. pj, josie, you never come to the fair?"

You point over at isabel and brittany standing a few feet away, where they had been gawking at them for the past 5 minutes.

"Ah, I see," She nods, I haven't seen you In ages I've missed you."

"Yeah.. me too," you blush, looking down at your shoes.

"Oh shit what happened to josies arm?"

"Masterbating."

"What, is her vagina made out of concrete or something?"

"No what? Hazel, she fell out of her bunk," pj scoffs.

"Can everyone please stop talking about my vagina?" Josie interjects.

"Soo hazel, what's this I hear about you volunteering at a slop farm?" Pj questions.

"The national meat association? Yeah it was good," hazel replies, "so did you guys get up to anything crazy over summer?"

"Yeah we killed this girl at camp for snitching on josie, got arrested, taken to Juvie and spent the rest of summer there, nearly died but they let us go when we told them that we're dykes and called them homophobic," pj explains sarcastically.

"What?! Are you guys okay?"

Josie facepalms.

You were about to explain that pj was being sarcastic when you hear cheering and you all look over to see Jeff appearing with the rest of the football team.

You all exchange disgusted looks and then pj notices that isabel and brittany are walking in your direction.

She snatches your corndog out of your hand and hands it to josie and then takes hazels cotton candy and hands her a wad full of tickets. Her and josie anxiously keep swapping the corndog and cotton candy mumbling to eachother until isabel and brittany are standing right infront of you all.

Josie drops her corndog, well actually YOUR corndog and kicks it away in hopes of isabel not noticing but both isabel and brittany look down and watch her do it, then look back up at her and raise their eyebrows.

"Hey can I uh, get my cotton candy back?" Hazel asks as she reaches forwards towards pj to grab it, but instead is hit in the head with it by pj who just ignores her and takes a bite out of it.

You look at hazel and shrug your shoulders, jerking your head to turn her attention back to the disaster of a conversation going on between the four of them.

"Oh hey, didn't see you there," brittany says to you poking her head round to look at you, "how's your summer been?"

"Yeah it's been good," you reply, "looking forward to cheering again though I've really missed it, what about you guys?"

"Yeah, I've been practicing all summer I'm really looking forward to getting back into it!" Isabel smiles, stepping forward.

The conversation goes on for a painful amount of time, every second making you want to gouge your eyeball out with a fork as you just make ridiculous faces at hazel, who just looks back at you the same way before giggling.

You went to follow pj and josie out to josies car when hazel quickly follows, "I can drive you home if you want, your on the way and I doubt you want to listen to another second of them babbling on about isabel and brittany."

"Yeah that would actually be great, thank you."

"No trouble at all," She says, "plus, it's an excuse to speak to you, we haven't had much of a chance to talk tonight."

She pulls out her car keys and unlocks her car, of course its a range rover. Her mom gave it to her as a pity gift when her dad left which obviously didn't fix the issue but hazel didn't complain and just accepted the car, even though she wasn't old enough to drive at the time, which her mom forgot because she barely pays any attention to her own daughter.

The drive is only 5 minutes long, since you live so close, so you don't get long to chat, but she tells you all about the meat association and the cool tshirt she got to wear, even showing you a photo when she pulls up on your driveway.

You lean over and give her a hug, "see you at school tomorrow?"

"Wouldn't miss it," She grins, "meet me outside to walk in together?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

Once you had kicked off your shoes and lazily removed your makeup, you got changed and plopped onto your bed.

Tonight was so chaotic yet for some reason you weren't thinking about pj and josies funny attempt at flirting or how they had made complete asses out of themselves, only about the drive home with hazel, how her hair blew in the wind, framing her face perfectly, how her hand gripped the steering wheel as she reversed out of the parking lot and how her eyes practically lit up when she was talking to you about her voluntary work over the summer.

You try to sleep but instead you lay awake for hours staring at your ceiling thinking about it. You simply cannot get her out of your head.

Huh. Maybe, just maybe, you did like hazel callahan? No. Surely not. Unless...

[kimmiessimmies]

Winter 08: Dateless - Pt.2 *Intermission*

A few things to say, prior to the dates

We're interrupting the story update for a few things worth knowing prior to Rachel's upcoming dates:

🖊 The scenes posted over the last three days were deliberately written and shot before I played the dates. I didn't want to be influenced by things that happened on the dates when I was writing about the moment they still had to occur. However, as you shall see, some things happening on some dates lined up perfectly with remarks made in the previous scenes. I'm not even surprised. In my gameplay days, I had weird coincidences like that happen to me all. the. time. 😁

💇🏽‍♂️ Like I said before, the guys may look slightly different in my game with my settings and defaults than originally intended by their creator. Also, for three of them (Alfie, Trey and Draxton), the hairstyle given by their creator didn't show up, so I gave them new hairstyles that resembled their original as closely as possible.

❄️ It's currently winter (February) in Honeycomb. So, any guys wearing clothes I deemed too cold for this weather or without outerwear, I redressed. I tried to honour their personal style when doing so.

☕️ I tried to match the activities and locations of the dates to the character of the guy involved to give each of them the best chance.

🕒 Each date lasted 3 to 4 sim hours. Because I use Nraas Relativity to slow things down a bit, that's a decent amount of time in my game.

👩🏻‍❤️‍👨🏻 I started each date by checking the attraction score. I make a note of that within the storyposts. The intention was to have the attraction score factor in if the dates in itself wouldn't amount to a clear conclusion. In that case, the attraction score could be the deciding element. As it turned out, the attraction score was often, though not always, quite a good indicator of how the date would go...

📷 I mostly left Rachel and her date to their own devices. I followed closely, took pictures and went along with the things they would decide for themselves. I posed things when it felt fitting to what was going on. For instance, on most dates, they spent a lot of time standing and talking, so what I did afterwards was pose a seated conversation or a walk because that is more natural and realistic than standing opposite one another, chatting for two hours.

🤷‍♀️ I struggled a bit with how I would show these dates. I've gotten so used to sharing storytelling style that going back to sharing gameplay style felt off. But Rachel and I found a solution, which I'm letting her tell you about in the first post scheduled for tomorrow!

These dates, people, they were an adventure! I saw a gatecrasher, a walk out, guys grabbing their phone to stream videos in the middle of the date, misplaced flirts, a lot of boasting, and misinterpretations. But also a lot of smiles, well-timed flirts, lively conversations, some hugs, sincere interest, and, most importantly, some sparks flying...

So, let's kick off!

Here's a reminder of the order of the dates, generated by a randomizer:

[gatitties]

Ho ho holidays!

Manager Miniseries

─ Aoba Josai x fem!reader

─ Summary: a christmas dinner with the team what can go wrong?

─ Warnings: none

2 < 3 > 4

* I'll be using (Nn) as nickname (only cause oikawa is oikawa and always need to give nicknames to everyone 🤨)

It was that time of the year, when the cold invades the streets and people celebrate with family or friends the arrival of a new year. Right now, the Seijoh team is doing the same thing, celebrating Christmas as a 'family'. Although more like an unstructured and chaotic family.

"The cookies! Cookies are burning!"

Yahaba ran arround Oikawa's house, who had offered to lend it to spend a couple of days while his parents visited the family. The poor boy did not know where to put the cookies that were literally on fire.

Kentaro frowned, wearing chicken mitts he grabbed the tray and flushed the food down the toilet, managing to extinguish the fire. They had to call Watari for him to cook something, since everyone except Iwa was a pain in the ass at cooking.

"Come on (Nn), accept that my jersey is the best."

Oikawa made some model poses. The third-year boys had held a small contest to find out who had the best Christmas sweatshirt, it should be noted that Iwaizumi was forced.

The captain, had a tree shirt, full of constantly blinking lights, looked like a living brothel. Mattsun and Iwa brought more normal ones, with a Christmas theme without lights or anything extravagant. Meanwhile, Makki, put on one with a reindeer that stood out in front of and behind him, giving the effect that the reindeer had passed through his body.

You left the votes to the first-year boys, although it was Kindaichi who proclaimed his captain the winner to stop bothering, since Kunimi fell asleep as soon as he wrapped himself in the blankets in the living room without bothering to remove the headband with horns and bells.

"The cookies are done!"

Most appreciated that the libero fixed the problem without burning down the house. Now everyone curled up in the big sofa, although some stayed on beanbags, like Kentaro, who didn't want to be next to anyone, 'anyone' being Oikawa.

You got to be next to Kindaichi and Mattsun, right in the center of the sofa.

"I choose first!"

Oikawa quickly grabbed the remote control, scrolling through a website of dubious origin and legality, but that didn't matter, all you wanted was to watch Christmas movies. You ended up watching a full marathon of Scrooge McDuck, along with other typical ones like Home Alone or the like.

When the credits rolled most of them were sound asleep, except for you, who couldn't sleep because Mattsun lay on your shoulder, you couldn't feel it for an hour. Kunimi had just woken up from sleeping earlier and Kentaro wasn't sleepy because he was like a rock.

You three looked at each other, in turn watching how everyone was sleeping peacefully. As good companions and friends you would let their elders rest a rare. But it just so happened that the three demons got together, the most tired of the team's stupidity.

You exchanged glances for the last time to nod, only woke up Watari and Iwaizumi, because you didn't want them to be affected, you also didn't want to make your 'mother' angry, and they just kept quiet, not admitting that they would enjoy watching the show.

"One, two…"

You whispered covering your ears like all your accomplices. Jingle Bell Rock was heard throughout the neighborhood and the rest of the team was foamed. The strange thing is that Mattsun didn't even flinch, he was still asleep like a log.

"You have started the war, I only warn."

Hanamaki acted offended hiding a playful smile.

"You all are so mean!"

As usual Oikawa had to make a scene so you just ignored him, Makki didn't complain and Yahaba just got a little angry for the scare. Kindaichi couldn't complain because he was a baby, you were kinder to him and didn't foam his face.

When everyone cleaned up properly, you all sat down to eat, since you couldn't be normal most of the time you spent throwing food from one side to another trying to make it fall into someone's glass. Luckily no one had to swallow any shrimp hair or poached grapes.

Everyone was more relaxed after the meal, chatting quietly by the fireplace until you squealed as were jerked off the ground.

"This will be my revenge, I will kidnap (N)! if you want her back you will have to defeat me in Twister."

"Well said Makki! We'll stick with (Nn)."

Oikawa came to his side, crossing his arms, nodding effusively, Yahaba and Kindaichi also joined.

"Have you hit your head or something? there was no way (N) would decide to go with you."

Iwaizumi frowned, holding back to kick his teammates, next to him were Kunimi, Kentaro and Watari.

"That's why we're kidnapping her!"

"You know that I can kick you and let go right?"

You were simply caught off guard, but you didn't have a hard time breaking Hanamaki's grip. He looked at you with puppy dog eyes, you rolled your eyes letting them continue with their stupid battle, just the same you had to watch how they fought among themselves.

You never felt so good to feel that thanks to your presence their were causing total chaos.

The 'poggers' team against the 'mommy & dog' team, you didn't pay much attention to them as you decided to snuggle up next to Mattsun, who had surprisingly gone back to sleep.

By the time both teams had finished their competition they felt betrayed as they watched Matsukawa hug you sideways. In addition, the cheeky opened one of his eyes, smiling and winking at them, pressing you closer against his chest.

"The betrayal bro!"

A burning smell filled the room, everyone looked at each other strangely when they saw the oven on fire, again.

"The cookies!"

"More...?"

"Who has let Yahaba come to the kitchen again?!"

Kentaro kicked in the kitchen door with a fire extinguisher in hand as Iwaizumi scolded them.

Yeah you couldn't have a normal party, at least this time you weren't at the epicenter of the chaos and were enjoying Mattsun's warm embrace.

[the-cu-genswap-au]

Behind the scenes post #2

continuing where we left off

#4. Production trivia #3: a tip for making comics: I want to talk about this random shot of the wall here

- In comics, when you have a scene with two characters talking to each other, it gets really boring when the entire scene just keeps cutting back and forth between the two over and over for the entire conversation. You want the scene to feel dynamic, like these are two people moving and existing in a fleshed out world.

- My strategy for this is usually to cut away to an important object within the same scene, or something in the background, just to avoid making the scene feel monotonous. You can see the same thing in this panel

- The problem, though, is that sometimes this strategy doesn't always work as well

- With the random wall panel, I only added it in because I knew I wanted to cut away from the characters for a bit, but the setting they were talking in (random empty alley behind the playground) didn't have a lot of interesting background elements to switch over to. So, I settled for the wall behind them. Admittedly it's not the most visually interesting thing to cut to, but I'd rather have this than keep cutting back and forth between the characters.

#5. Real world influence:

- This shot of the playground was partially inspired by the playground at my own elementary school! I remember we had a fenced-in basketball court that faced out towards the park outside the school, and the entire fence was surrounded by trees and bushes. It made a nice shady spot to sit down and read in during recess.

- I draw a lot from my own elementary school experiences for this AU. I threw in a reference to Jerry Spinelli because we had to read a lot of his books in fourth grade, and a lot of smaller props the characters use are based on ones I remember using back then.

#6. Recurring detail:

- Sometimes I like to shade Melvin in a way that's meant to evoke Melvinborg. Not because Melvinborg is relevant to the AU, but because I just think it looks cool :)

#7. Complaining about my own handiwork: this is a really quick personal gripe I wanted to get off my chest

- Out of all the environments, vehicles, perspective shots, and crowd shots I've had to do so far for this comic, the hardest thing to draw by far.... has been George's arm in this panel.

- I don't know what happened here! Anatomy is usually so much easier to draw in the CU art style but this arm just didn't want to work for me! I genuinely spent hours trying to make this arm look good! Here's the sketch:

And here is where I considered giving up and drawing him a completely different arm position I thought might be easier to draw:

Ultimately I did go back to the original pose, though. It just felt a little more dynamic, and the scene really needed more dynamicism.

#8. Another little detail:

These two panels actually have some foreshadowing in them :) :). This will make sense later.

[theclairvoyage]

Chapter 3: Flor de Caña

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Pairing: Javier Peña x AUSA!f!reader

Fresh off acing his marksmanship test, Javi returns to The Dark Horseman, where he gets to know an alluring attorney.

Chapter warnings: alcohol consumption, smoking, firearm use, adult language, mentions of violence, mentions of human trafficking, mentions of drugs, mentions of graphic violence, mentions of substance abuse and death, allusions to smut, crime scene investigation, murder, reader is able-bodied, has long hair and is roughly the same height as Javi, Spanish usage (translations at the end)

WC: 4k

Fall 1992

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

Javier shoves his Glock 19 in his waistband, sweat droplets rolling from his forehead and audibly landing on the cold cement floor of the outdoor shooting range at the Federal Building.  Penn stands behind him, stopwatch looped around his wrist, clipboard clutched to his chest, occasionally pulling it in front of him to jot down scores.

“Alright, Peña—last stage,” he barks, “2 shots standing and 3 kneeling, all behind cover and all from 25 yards.  You’ll do that twice.  Questions?”

Javi spits as he shakes his head, some stray dirt, bugs, and sweat having accumulated in his mouth during the first 7 stages.  He wipes his brow one last time, loads the Glock, and gets ready for Penn to give him the go-ahead.

“And… go!” Penn yells.  Javi goes into action mode, standing behind the wall prop and peeking out to shoot the target.  Bang.  Bang.

He drops to his knee and aims, firing three more times.  Bang.  Bang.  Bang.  Rinse and repeat.

He stands, signaling that he’s done.  Penn clicks the stopwatch and tallies Javier’s score on the clipboard.  He whistles.

“Congrats, Peña—you passed, and with an instructor certification score of 56/60.  You’ll be able to teach this stuff once you’re fully certified as a special agent,” Penn says, clapping Javi on the back.  Javi snorts.

“Thanks, Penn.  Shooting in the jungle makes everything else seem so easy,” he murmurs.  Penn guffaws.

“Now we can finally set up this stakeout in Lawton,” he says, cheesy grin plastered on his wrinkled face.  Javier is elated—he had been looking forward to being out in the field again and partaking in the action.  Stakeouts were his bread and butter—he spent countless hours posted up in an unmarked vehicle or building surveilling and directing moves in Colombia.  It felt good to finally be able to put his skills to use.

“What’s the preliminary plan?  And site?” Javier asks, unloading the chamber of his warm gun.

“There’s an International Festival next week that spans 3 days.  It’ll be packed.  People from all over Oklahoma and the country attend.  Our surveillance team has gotten confirmation that the Locos will be there, most likely looking for falcons and setting up transactions,” Penn says.  Javier nods.

“So, are we planning on posing as employees?  Police?” Javi guesses as Penn leads them back into the building.

“Specifics are still in the works, though I like your thinking.  We’ll work with OKCPD and LPD to figure out the best plan,” Penn says, impressed.  Javi fights the urge to roll his eyes—he might’ve been an FBI rookie, but he’d had years of experience as a federal agent under his belt.  He decides to give Penn the benefit of the doubt—the man is corny, but he’s at least giving feedback.

“US Attorney’s Office gonna be assisting?” Javi asks nonchalantly, already knowing Penn will have something curt to say.  Sure enough, Penn winks at Javi.

“Miss her already, eh?” Javi rolls his eyes so hard it hurts.  Penn chuckles.  “Just givin’ ya shit.  Yes, the Assistant US Attorney will be helping.  Might even be part of the surveillance team.”

Javi’s eyes widen.  “S���not a good idea for her to be in plainclothes.  People probably know who she is and that might set off some alarms,” he reminds Penn.

“You are correct,” Penn agrees, “But she doesn’t usually go out in plainclothes.  She’ll be watching and listening elsewhere.”

Quietly, Javi breathes a sigh of relief.  He’s already protective of you—something new for him.  Penn, like clockwork, interrupts his thoughts.

“Peña—you’ve got one test left before you’ll be a fully certified Special Agent.  Your Supervisory Special Agent training will take place after that,” he beams, clapping a hand on Javi’s shoulder.  Javi shakes his head, smirking.

“I’ve had some practice, Penn—should’ve been certified sooner,” he bemoans.  He’s always been tough on himself, reflective of how he was raised.  Penn scoffs.

“You’re doing great.  We really are lucky to have you—the DEA screwed up real bad,” he chuckles.  Javi snorts.

“Take the rest of the day—we’ll figure out a plan with the Assistant Director, US Attorney’s Office, and the PD Teams soon.  Nice work.”  Javi gives Penn a single nod before leaving for the day.

Javi awakens in the hours post dinnertime that evening.

“Fuck,” he groans.  He doesn’t nap for this reason.  He glances at his watch, digging into his wrist from his slumber.  It’s not too late, but late enough for a drink.

He’d lied down when he got back from work, exhausted from the marksmanship test, and relished the comfort of his new sectional.  His apartment was finally starting to resemble a residence, and not a bachelor pad.  Unfortunately for him, though, the couch might’ve been a little too comfortable.  It was a stark contrast from his stone slab of a mattress.

Throwing on some jeans and a loose button-up linen shirt, he makes the trek to the Horseman.  The creaky door opens the same way it always does, and the jukebox is playing the same slow song, but there’s something different—you.

You’re perched in the same chair you were last time he saw you here, though you’re wearing shorts and a baggy tee.  He glances at your long, smooth legs and swallows hard—he’s starting to think that perhaps every part of you is perfect.  You turn and watch him saunter over to the bar, smirking.  Javi can’t help the smirk that follows on his own face.

He pulls back the chair next to you and gestures.  “Is this seat taken?” he says, voice still raspy from his nap.  You notice, cocking an eyebrow at him, smirk still contouring your cheeks.

“It is now,” you reply smoothly.  Javi’s stomach does some somersaults as he pulls up next to you, realizing this is the first time you two have been in such proximity.  He takes a deep breath as the bartender pours him his usual, taking your scent with him.  He fights the urge to groan.

“You look tired,” you say, eyeing him as he takes the first sip of his whiskey.  His hair is slightly mussed, button up shirt undone at the top, revealing a strong, tanned chest.  His sleeves are short, too, showing off ropy forearms.  Your thighs contract instinctively.

“Made the mistake of taking a nap,” he replies, smoothing a hand through his hair.  It’s like he heard your thoughts.

“Another rookie mistake,” you quip, bringing your glass to your lips.  He bursts out laughing, uncovering a brilliant smile that you had failed to notice.

“You’re funny, Lawyer Lady,” he says, staring at you as you take a sip.  His gaze spans your face, making frequent stops at your lips and eyes.  He’s not even trying to hide his attraction, now.  You giggle and shake your head, not meeting his eyes—you can feel them pierce your skin.

“Seems like you got it all.  Brains, looks, charm.  Must be nice,” he says, nudging your side lightly with his elbow.

“I should charge just for my presence, yeah?” you joke, pulling another belly laugh from him.

“Well, if law doesn’t work out, you have a few options,” he replies.  It’s his turn to take a sip now, and you watch as his lips groove over the rim of the glass, mustache hairs swaying from the air escaping his nostrils as he tips back.  That fucking mustache did things to you, made you squirm inside.  You wanted to feel it scratch the skin on your lips, your—

“Why do I feel like you’re hitting on me, Javi?” you croon, a lame attempt to silence your dirty thoughts.  He stiffens, nerves alight—usually, he’s on point with the charm when it comes to women.  You, though?  Different ballgame.  You sniffed him out from the jump.  He figures up a witty remark before the awkward silence settles.

“What, no one’s ever told you that you’re smart and beautiful?  I’m the first?” You’re caught off guard by his humor, and another loud laugh escapes your lips.  You roll your eyes and shake your head.

“You’re not too bad yourself, Peña,” you say, finishing your drink with a quick swig.  He shivers at your compliment.  The bartender comes over and raises his brows at you, silently asking if you’d like another.

“Yeah, I’m good for more.  Late start tomorrow,” you say, shrugging your shoulders.

Pulse thrumming, Javi leans back in the chair as he thinks of something to say.  He wants to know you but doesn’t want to push too fast.

“You live close to here?  Or you just took to this particular hole in the wall?” Javi asks, spinning the chair to face you.  You watch the bartender pour you another glass before doing the same, crossing one leg over the other and leaning back.  He tries not to glance down at your legs.

“Both,” you reply, taking a sip.  Javi nods.  His gaze is hot on your face.  He’s entranced by your eyes, but damn, his are just as magnetizing.  He realizes he still doesn’t know the mysterious brown liquid you’re drinking.

“Whiskey drinker?  You are from the Midwest,” he asks, reaching for a toothpick from the bar station.  He maneuvers it around his mouth, tip rustling the bristles of his mustache, drawing your eyes there.  He turns to look at you again, and you tear your gaze from his lips.

“Hell no.  Rum.  My dad was the whiskey drinker.  Couldn’t put that bottle down,” you say, voice dropping in volume slightly.  Javier assumes he’s dead, by your change in tone and expression.

“Sorry to hear that.  My dad loved the bottle, too,” he says, tilting his head at you involuntarily.  You lock eyes with him for a moment, and he sees pain.  Pain that you’ve gotten adept at stuffing behind the many boxes within your brain.  Your lips pull into a smile, but your eyes don’t change.

“It’s a hard thing to quit,” you say, nodding slowly and looking away from Javi.  He can tell this is a sore spot for you—your demeanor has morphed from playful to solemn, though you still seem happy.  Instinctively, he reaches out and touches your forearm, sending shocks up to your shoulder.

“I know exactly what you mean, hermosa,” he says, not fighting the compulsion this time.  You are beautiful, after all.  He removes his hand after a beat, the warmth from his fingertips lingering on your skin.  You crack a big smile, and your eyes finally match.

“Anyway.  I see you discovered that I’m not married,” you say, lips twitching into a smirk.  Redness blooms on his neck and ears as he recalls looking at your left hand in the conference room the other day.

“Sorry—instinct,” he says, half-truthfully.

“Yeah?  Been with a lot of married women?” you poke.  He loves how playful you are, sparring with him like one of the boys.  There’s a childlike curiosity to you that fascinates him.  He chuckles, turning away to take a sip.

“I won’t lie to you, I have,” he says matter-of-factly.  “Not my finest moment.”  Now, it’s your turn to put a hand on his forearm.  He freezes at your touch.

“It’s okay—I was partly joking.  Not judging you,” you say.  He turns to look at you, deep amber eyes smoldering.  It catches you off guard and scares you—he could make you do anything if he looks at you like that.  Your heart threatens to escape your ribcage.  You swallow, tucking the nerves away, and speak again.

“I did some reading up on you, Javi.  You’re highly regarded in the DEA world,” you say, removing your hand from his arm and propping your head on your hand as you study him.  He shrugs, lips moving to one side of his face.

“It was a hard gig, chasing Escobar.  I’m glad I’m here, though,” he says, staring in your eyes.  It’s quiet for a moment, except the sparks flying between the two of you, hot and molten.

“Me, too.  We’re lucky to have you,” you say, finally breaking eye contact to take another sip.  His eyes travel down to your crossed legs, to your worn sandals, back up to your face.  He can’t get over how gorgeous you are—and he’s never had to hold back with a woman like this.  Taking a deep breath and another sip of whiskey, he studies at the bottles behind the bar momentarily.

“So—you drinking Captain?” he asks, head bobbing as he searches for all the rum bottles on display.

“I honestly don’t know—I think tonight is Flor de Caña,” you say in perfect Spanish.  Javi’s not surprised but impressed.

“¿Hablas español, hermosa?” Javi tests you, eyes crinkling from the big smile he’s sporting.

“Sí, empecé a aprender cuando era joven,” you reply, not missing a beat.  He shakes his head as he turns away, still grinning.

He was fucked.

“You try a new one every night, then?” he asks.  You nod.

“Yeah, if I can.  Makes things interesting,” you reply, swishing the brown liquid around the glass as you try to count off how many bottles you’ve tried behind the bar.  You’re not sure—this quiet tavern does a surprisingly good job of rotating liquors at a decent pace.

Feeling a whiskey-powered surge of bravado, Javi takes a risk and asks a personal question.

“So, Lawyer Lady—you ever been married before?” he asks, turning to watch your reaction.  You mirror him and cock an eyebrow, pursing your lips in amusement.

“Nope.  What about you?  I’m sure women fall over for you,” you ask, matching his courage.  Your brand of it is sexier, though, he thinks.  He snorts, a lame attempt to disguise his giddiness from yet another compliment from you.

“No, hermosa—never had the time nor the desire,” he replies.  You nod slowly, breaking eye contact and staring down at your glass.  He can’t tell if you’re surprised, bummed, or just thinking.

“Me neither.  Odds of anything lasting are too low for my liking,” you say, finishing your glass.  He chuckles.

“So, you’re a math nerd, too?” Javi teases, poking your ribs again with his elbow.  You shake your head and laugh, some loose hair falling from your shoulders to your arm.  Instinctively, Javi pulls them from your skin, the feeling of you electrifying his fingertips.  His touch burns your skin.  Your breath hitches ever so slightly, but he notices.

“Sorry, it’s j—,” he starts, before you cut him off.

“Instinct?  I figured.  It’s okay,” you tease him, punctuating the word playfully.  His fingertips rest on your forearm as he stares at you, still blazing, his gaze sweeping down to your lips.  The rum has you feeling quite brave, too, and you test the waters with a question of your own.

“And what’s behind the way you keep staring at my lips?  Instinct, too?”

Javi’s heart bangs against his chest, eyes widening briefly in surprise before he feels the blood in his limbs rush to a different appendage.  Fuck it, he thinks.  He feels good about this.

“That, or I just really wanna kiss you.” His eyebrow cocks as he half-smirks at you, leaning closer to you ever so slightly.  At this point, he’d normally be balls deep in whatever poor lass approached him at the bar, clothes piled on the floor and tongues tangled, but he wants to savor this—it’s almost foreplay, the way you two tease and tango.  He struggles to keep his erection tame in his jeans.

You giggle quietly, almost mischievously, fantasizing of you perched on your kitchen countertop, legs wrapped around Javi as he fucks you slow and hard.  You can almost hear his pants and groans in your ear, breath caressing your skin as his lips and teeth mark your neck.  You shiver.

“What’s funny, hermosa?” He asks, tantalized, similar images projecting in his head.  He needs to leave soon, before he busts out of these jeans.

“Oh, nothing at all—truly,” you say with a sly smile, taking some cash out of your purse and dropping it next to your empty glass.  You stand from the chair and stretch absentmindedly, the hem of your shirt lifting to reveal the bottom half of your navel and smooth hipbones loosely draped in denim.  Javi’s eyes immediately lock on, and he takes a deep breath, trying to stifle the growl in his chest.  He takes another sip, aggressively.

“¿De qué piensas?” he asks, still watching as your arms come back down, shirt hem slowly covering your exposed skin.  You groan as you finish releasing the tension in your back and shoulders.  Fuck, he does like every sound you make.

“About how not ready I am for this recon mission coming up,” you lie, folding those pornographic images and other feelings about Javi you’re not ready to acknowledge in the pit of your mind.

“Piece of cake.  Trust me.  Can I walk you out?” he says, fishing bills out of his wallet and standing to join you.  He despises the thought of you walking alone in the dark, even if you’re well-acquainted with the area.  You nod, smiling softly at him.

You wave at the bartender and head for the exit as Javi follows, his warm hand finding home on the small of your back as he guides and opens the door for you.  You feel safe around him, which simultaneously alarms and arouses you.

The outside air greets you, quiet gusts nipping at your skin.  You instinctively wrap your hands around your arms and rub the goosebump-ridden flesh.  Javi curls his hand around your waist and pulls you closer, hoping to share some of the warmth from his body with you.  You relax into him as you walk toward the parking lot.

An eternity seems to pass as both of you trek toward your car, quiet steps in perfect synchrony.  The streetlights paint both of you in a flickering melon-amber glow.  You feel almost ethereal in his grasp, and he, too, as he holds you so closely to him.  His grip on your waist is soft, but his arm is firm around your back, a silent promise of protection.  This is not how either of you expected your day to culminate, but it’s a welcome surprise.  Oddly enough, it doesn’t feel foreign.

Your unique scent invades his nostrils, fucking with his head—he’s so giddy and nervous from being around you, but touching and smelling you makes his dick grow harder and harder as you get closer to your car.

“This is me,” you say, nodding toward a beat-up sedan.  Javi whistles.

“This is what they got you driving?  C’mon, LL—you need something fancier,” he jokes, lightly squeezing your waist.  Rolling your eyes, you laugh and pull your keys out of your purse, facing away from him.

“It’s inconspicuous—it’s not my car, either,” you say, winking playfully at Javi.  He swallows hard.  You turn to look at him and study his face.

The earth stills for a moment as both of you ponder how to say goodbye.  Javi wasn’t kidding earlier about wanting to kiss you, needing to feel your plush lips and your body pressed against his.  You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want the same.  All you’d need to do is lean in a bit and close your eyes.  Javi’s gaze draws a triangle from your eyes to your lips, fingertips lightly digging into your side.

A loud gale interrupts your thoughts, your hair flying into your vision.  Javi, acting on instinct once again, reaches to smooth the strands from your face.  You blink at him.  His hand hooks under your jaw, thumb swiping the soft skin of your face.  Your legs tremble ever so slightly.

“I’ll see you around, hermosa,” he breathes, leaning in.  You close your eyes and expect his lips to meet yours, but they don’t—they brush your cheek in a soft, soft kiss.  It’s delicate, sweet—and irritating.  You wanted more.

“Bye, Javi,” you murmur, surprisingly frustrated.  You turn away and try to leave his grasp, but he holds you firm at the waist.

“Hey,” he says, urging your attention, “You okay?”

You blink a couple times as you stare back at him, heat pooling in your cheeks.  He sees the frustration on your face.  You’d somewhat melted in his touch and peeled back some layers, showing him more emotion than you’d preferred—now, it’s made you feel like an idiot.

“Yes, of course… why wouldn’t I be?” you breathe, realizing now that you’re panting.  Javi is, too—holding back like this is a skill he’s not practiced often.  He still has a hand on your cheek, the other on your waist.  Puppy dog eyes stare back at you, hypnotizing you into tranquility.

“I normally don’t… don’t do this kinda stuff,” Javi says, looking down at the ground briefly.

“Do what?  Meet up with somewhat strangers at weird taverns and discuss alcoholic fathers?” you quip, grinning.  There, you are.  Javi chuckles.

“Only beautiful ones,” he adds, expression softening. Your smile fades and cheeks burn at his compliment.

“Something tells me that you’re good at getting people to do what you want,” you admit, mesmerized by his gaze.

“Yeah?  Are you included in that?” he asks quietly, pensive brown eyes glued to yours.  He’s not looking at your lips, now—he wants to see you.  You laugh breathily and shrug.

“You’ll have to present solid evidence to convince me to do anything,” you tease.  He chuckles again.

“So… can I convince you to go out into the field with me in Lawton?” he postulates, raising an eyebrow at you.  Your eyes widen in disbelief.

“Absolutely not—no matter how good you are,” you say, chuckling incredulously.

Suddenly, Javi pulls you into a warm embrace, arms looped under yours and barred across your back.  You sigh heavily, wrap your arms around his broad shoulders, and sink into him once again, now taking in his scent.  Cedarwood, musk, aftershave, whiskey, and faint cigarette smoke—complex, yet telling.  A man in pain, struggling to find purpose.  Your heart sinks at the thought of him drinking his own life away.  Javi pulls away slightly after a beat and you feel his breath—and smirk—on your earlobe.

“You have no idea how good I am, hermosa,” he whispers.  You freeze momentarily and stifle a whimper at the thought of what his mouth and that mustache can do.  You unwrap from each other, and he holds your hand for a moment before kissing the back of it softly.

“Bye, Rookie,” you breathe, smiling.  A similar one cracks on his face.

“Adios, hermosa.”  You watch him turn and walk the opposite direction, hand pulling a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.

"Hey!" you call.  He turns to face you, now walking backwards toward his apartment.  He cocks his head at you and grins as he takes a drag.

“Stuff’s gonna kill you,” you scold him playfully.  He shakes his head, smiling as he pulls the cigarette from his lips and exhales a trail of smoke from the side of his mouth.

"S'not the only thing."

Javi walks home with a pep in his step.

Your scent lingers on his shirt, in his nostrils.  Sweet, spicy, alluring.

Pictures of your face plaster the walls of his mind.  Your beautiful eyes, your wit.  Your boisterous laugh.

He wants to hear all your sounds, to see all your emotions spilling out of those captivating eyes.  He wants to feel your breath quicken as he brings you to ecstasy and feel it slow as you fall asleep next to him.

And as he finally drifts off to sleep, he dreams of your skin on his, your laughter, and a field of flores.

¿Hablas español, hermosa = do you speak Spanish, beautiful?

Sí, empecé a aprender cuando era joven = Yes, I began learning when I was young.

Flor de Caña = Cane Flower

¿De qué piensas? = What are you thinking about?

Taglist: @burntheedges <3

Please message me or reply to this if you want to be added! :)

[silvermoon822]

Comic practice-Rough Drafts 1/3!

I spent my last week of 2022 and first month of 2023 starting my resolution of improving my comic art. I knew I wanted to finish it within January after Henson Co put out their cute “January is for Jareth” thing, and I was like “oh heck yes it is!”

One of the biggest areas I feel I am lacking in is composition/layout, dynamic poses, and pacing. I know the best way to improve on these areas is to keep working on them, and that is best achieved by drawing comics! In order to save myself from burnout, I decided to use a script I could recite from start to finish (songs included!), and therefore Labyrinth was the best choice. This scene in particular was fun to choose because of the fun variance in lighting, creating a great way to practice my values and contrast too!

What really interested me at the end of this was that you can see where I really get into the groove around pg 6 or so. Lines are more confident and the art cleans up a lot. It all still has a way to go before I would count it “print ready” though. The next step would be to go back over these pages and clean the lines up even further, fix anatomy or pose issues (plenty of those in the first couple of pages) and start setting up tones to make more cohesive scenes. By the end of the next step, it’ll be more or less “print ready” in black and white.Critique is more than welcome for these! I’m trying to improve!! One major thing that I can already see bugging me is jareth’s hair changing volume from page to page and definitely work needed on Sarah’s face…like…everywhere. I’m also looking to improve my speech bubbles here. I feel like I’m close, and I like what I did with the different styles for Hoggle, Jareth, and Sarah, but I feel like it’s still not totally “there”. That all being said, I’m pretty proud of myself for cranking out 21~ pages in around a month and around working 40-60 hours a week. I look forward to cleaning these up and making them look even better for my portfolio. I mean, the dream is to do this for a living, and even better if it’s working for Henson Co. I have my work cut out for me! 😄

[heybatterbats]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

Thank you so much! Wow, my first ask!! 😁😁😁

1. Fandom makes me happy! I’m already loving running a fandom blog, it’s so much fun! I spent the first day sending slightly panicked asks to the biggest blogs I could think of, asking how the heck do I do this. I spent the second day following every blog I could find. My dashboard is hopping with content now, and I love it so much!

2. The Batfamily makes me happy! I do write for other fandoms, sometimes- I have an X-men/Avengers fic I’m working on. But the Batfamily, and DC in general, just took hold of my heart. I love the characters and all the dynamics you can play with. I love that it ranges from soft, goofy slice-of-life to dark, edgy pieces that kick you in the teeth and make you think, to everything in between. I love this fandom!

3. Writing makes me happy! I’ve already posted two out of thirteen parts to my 2023 spooky fic, and I’m having a ball! I have so much fun writing my various stories, playing around with my word choices, style choices, tenses and POVs…and seeing everyone’s reactions is probably my favorite part. I had someone on my darkest fic tell me that the new chapter made them want to gouge their eyes out with a spoon, and that’s one of the highest compliments I’ve ever received!

4. Performing makes me happy! I’m an actor/dancer- I’m currently in rehearsals for The Nutcracker and a short play with my college. I’m in love with the stage and hope to make it a career one day! I dance every day right now, and act once a week, and it’s so much fun seeing all my studio/theater friends so often. And I love making the audience laugh! One of my Nutcracker roles- lead Polichinelle- is a comic one, I get to mess up the whole scene on purpose and then finish with a big slide into a pose like I’m just so proud of myself for getting absolutely everything wrong. I just love it, and I know the audience is going to be laughing their heads off when we perform it, and I’m going to be the happiest I’ve ever been!

5. My cat makes me happy! I have a cat called Marmalade- he’s big, orange, fluffy, and dumb as a box of rocks. He likes to bite my knees. He ripped a hole in my last pair of ballet tights because he climbed up my leg for treats. He crashes into stationary objects regularly. He thinks he can kill the water in my sink. He wants to eat whatever I’m eating no matter what it is. He farts a lot. He screams in the wee hours of the morning. He’s my baby and I love him to bits.

Uhhh…well, only one person has reblogged from me as of right now, so I guess I’ll just do them and add the other nine as it happens?😅 Thanks so much for this, I had a lot of fun with it!

[totemsp2blog]

Creating an hour feature (a post-mortem)

I just got done creating (mere seconds shy of) an hour of film from a night I played Halo 3 with some friends. I may have spent a little too much time and effort on it… and may have gone too far in some places.

But to be honest, I had the enthusiasm of my friends backing me the entire time I was working on it. As a result, I was able to produce, with the help of my friends, a work pretty up there in terms of personal video editing projects go.

At this point, it’s important to speak of the talents, and qualities that these people brought to this project. A project which served be simply edited footage of us goofin’ in video games, nevertheless…

NoTengoTortuga, is a 3D artist and Blender Guru, and was responsible for creating the CGI poses of our Spartans for most of the chapter cards between missions (I said Spartans… no that’s not an elite, that’s the actual Master chief!) Tortuga, or Joe as we call him, currently uses said skills professionally, but out of love of the craft, he contributed his skills, and has literally crafted stuff out of dreams I had for the project, Including the amazing Rainbow Six Siege inspired chapter card, and the ‘Warframe tableau inspired’ end scene. It’s more than I ever could’ve asked for, which what I’m saying is everything I did ask for, he delivered on, and more. There wouldn’t have been images for the chapter cards, he just stepped up and started making them.

AstroCorgi, or Goatz_ballz, or SpaceManMike? I’ll just call him Mike like we all do. Mike’s contributions to the project were important for a simple reason: he noticed things that I didn’t. He was the one to spot things in the background of otherwise uninteresting scenes, such as the two’s warthog jumping off a ledge, or a grunt t-posing off their ghost upon getting smashed into… by the two’s warthog. And so, his input and attention to detail added a lot to the project.

So, with the help of the people interested in this funny Halo 3 game film of all of us playing, this undoubtedly turned into a group project. It also emboldened us to add to it, and in turn, take the ambition way up. It was a good thing… but as Strong Bad once said, too much of a good thing is an awesome thing, but too much of an awesome thing is holy crapazoli or something… I’m sure he said that once I dunno…

I would like to explain my state of mind during this project.

I’m about to speak a little bit more seriously about things, I hope you don’t mind.

I am someone currently feeling like a prisoner in my own body. Yes that sounds pretty serious but let me explain. I have dreams and aspirations, and the means and knowledge to carry them out. I could realistically learn everything my associates that worked with me on this know, and as I’ll get into later, out of an apparent need to help their load, I did try to in order to help their load. But, I have a severe, and inconsistent lack of energy to do… a lot more than I want to. I’m in a place right now where… everything feels like a lot, even if there isn’t a lot going on in my life right now.

I ended last year in possibly the worst place I’ve ever been mentally. The details are too personal for this fairly personal blog, and I feel like I’m firmly in the depression stage of grief.

Simply put, I’ve been pretty down, and tired, burnt out.

Where this ties into the project is that I did what was absolutely best for me, and went at my own pace, which was nice and glacial. And I will admit, when I’m in it, It can be pretty comfy trimming film, and when I get an idea for something cool, it’s fun to act on it, and I acted on a lot… but the thing is, I had to act on it, otherwise I don’t know if I’d ever get it done… which has been a thing long before… what happened last year.

And then my cool Blender friend Joe stepped up and decided to pull these rips of the Halo 3 MCC Spartans from The Halo Archive and make poses for the chapters.

So now on top of my (and Mike’s) attention to detail, coupled with my knowledge of what could be possible in video production, we now had access to full 3D CGI assets. Absolutely mental.

But it also meant… I had to call upon people to help get stuff done. My fatal weakness! Something I’ve delt with all my life.

It just comes down to my ability to… social… and I don’t doubt those who have known me have come to understand this. But what I fail to understand and was literally stated to me is Joe loves doing this shit. It would be like somebody coming to me asking for a… uhh…

Uh…

A thing… that… I would like to make? PowerPoint Cartoon? An edit of someone’s funny game footage? Their Dinner? A gman impression?

Anyway, that didn’t stop me from chronically worrying about bothering anyone for anything. But I did rise above that eventually and boy was it worth it. I thought that Rainbow Six Siege inspired image was going to be tough but somehow, he pulled it off to my exact specifications. Huh… like, huh… yeah? Who knew someone good at their shit was going to give me a good fuckin’ result, and not even break a mention of concern at possible difficulty in producing it?

That was one of the things I thought I had to try and put together myself. I was in a manic scramble to bring together some tools I had lesser knowledge on in order to try something, but when I got an early shot showing me how possible it was by his hand, the least I did was play with the pose a little, which is something I had to learn in blender to do, and guess who taught me? The bloke and friend what does Blender professionally, currently making shit for me! It all makes sense, right? and I should stick to what I know and trust willing people to be willing.

What does having access to this kind of talent mean for the overall work load?

Well…

Not much, I was still editing film like I would’ve, and probably would’ve put too much effort into it regardless. Joe was happy to do his thing, and he was knowledgeable enough to produce it with ease. Mike was staying up way past bedtime to hang out and watch me edit and go through footage right up till the final clip, because he wanted to. And all the while I was getting input from the both of them, and it felt pretty normal.

So what’s the problem?

Well…

Corel VideoStudio.

What I can say of Corel is… at least they’re not Adobe. But they are geriatric in the way they do things, especially their business practices, which is good and bad… but compared to Adobe, they’re the lesser of two evils. VideoStudio is cheap in comparison and buy once and keep forever… unless a new version comes out and you have to buy that version… at a discount at least.

That’s not the issue.

I experienced way more technical problems both familiar and new during this project, with the version of VideoStudio I’ve been using.

Slow editor performance

Crashing

Audio track waves not showing after a certain time

Audio track randomly panning

Audio envelopes not working as intended

Let me talk about this one in particular. The scene where the Warthog drives through a tunnel playing the polka from Red vs Blue? That was working as intended, with effects, panning, volume, everything… until it wasn’t randomly. No matter what I did, I couldn’t even get the panning to work, and if that didn’t work then…

I had to put the video into an external program and create a premixed audio clip.

Anyway, the list isn’t over…

Audio would sometimes distort loudly when being previewed or played, scaring the buhjezzus out of me and those watching my stream.

Crashing during the encoding process?

Actually… no! The project before it (another video of me playing Halo with friends) the encoding crashed multiple times, until I tried encoding without GPU acceleration. But This time, the encoding went just fine…

Until, I looked through the video and found it full of problems.

But… luckily, it wasn’t to much of an issue, and is more my fault. You see, I originally wanted to output the projects as a 30 FPS film, but the footage was in 60 FPS, and so the project was set up for that, and I edited the whole film in 60 FPS. So I go to render the film in 30, only to find the film missing cues for the audio envelop changes, and even erroneous black frames and timing issues throughout.

Simply Rendering out 60 FPS fixed everything… as if it was meant to be. Lesson learned.

So in the end…

I can safely say, I probably won’t go as far next time. Sticking with tight edits and maybe some funny sound clips here and there, who knows.

One thing is for sure…

I can’t keep using Corel VideoStudio anymore

I kept using it because it was convenient, and simple and very easy to make things with. And I’ve been using it for over a decade. I’m a slave to it’s ability to make zoom & panning easy.

But… the editor is too slow, and I don’t understand why even after all these years. Maybe due to the ancient code that it probably retains from the years back when it was using X* for the different versions… maybe even back when it was called Ulead VideoStudio.

I must move on to something modern, and it’ll take some learning to do.

Luckily, I’m nowhere near short on Server 9 game footage to edit.

Thanks again to the two great guys I played with, and subsequently took interest and contributed to what I have made… and more importantly, understood my pace.

[indranilpractice1]

Post 1:

Hello, my name is Indranil Chakraborty. This is my blog to keep track of my progress, update my work and assignments while critically examining media that inspires me as well as the assignments and work that I create. On rare occasions have I been able to provide myself with constructive criticism without it turning into a rather negative spiral of criticism that eventually hinders my progress and demotivates me. For this very reason I have spent some time away from creating and I plan to change that in the coming weeks. I am still learning the ropes of maintaining a blog so kindly bare with me till I am able to establish a structure for the content that I post.

I would also like to establish some goals for myself to work on as the semester progresses (which definitely are subject to change) are as follows:

Be consistent and draw everyday

Attempt to study one creator every week as I believe this might be a good amount of time to understand and absorb certain aspects of their work such as line art, shape language usage of colour, so on and so forth. This will also include media such as articles, interview, process time-lapses, etc.

I would also like to study principles like anatomy and colour while doing other studies as well as and when I find time to do so

Finally, make sure that the self reflections and critical deep dives into my practice and study sessions are strictly constructive.

Its Sunday (20.09.24) here is some of the work that I have done after my practical class

Content Description:

Over the last 3 days, I attempted to draw digitally, a medium that I am comfortable with and made two self portraits of myself. I have started a new sketchbook and not knowing what exactly to fill in my first page I went down the rabbit hole of Pinterest looking for inspiration that eventually lead me nowhere. I finally settled on drawing my Bulbasaur plushie that sits on my desk beside me after which I proceeded to practice a 1 hour session of learning the anatomy of hands and feet.

Critical Reflections:

After reviewing my work here are some criticisms that I would give myself:

The digital drawing show a lack of anatomy knowledge. The proportions of the face could be improved. The line weight of the self portrait could be improved in areas like the scarf worn since it does seem a little flat as compared to the rest of the drawing. Overall I feel that not enough intention was put into the illustration.

This sketch was just an ideation for the red vs blue prompt. I think it does get the idea across to an extent but only provides a faint detail as to what is happening in the scene. The arms of the character could be more anatomically correct. The left hand coming out of the sleeve seems displaced as compared to the position of the sleeve. The left shoulder should also be slightly higher. There are some dynamic aspects to the drawing that do show motion such as the flying scarf and the bag but the body of the character could definitely be pushed more.

for the traditional drawings, the Bulbasaur drawings do show some imaginative and iterative qualities. Being quick sketches they do not have the quality of detail. I could have also been more imaginative with the poses as they feel quite static with respect to the freedom I approached this page with. As for the hands and feet studies, I allotted myself about 5-6 minutes to complete each drawing. This was a very straightforward study of the subjects from the website https://line-of-action.com/practice-tools/hands-feet-practice . However it does feel like I approached the study from the perspective of being able to copy my subject rather than understand its shapes. I was unclear with the goal of the study which I think i should establish from the next study that I do.

[chornayadrakoshig]

I'm just going to post the whole list together

2024 FANWORKS WRAPPED 🔄️

I tried to make it inclusive of all fanworks and all fanwork creators - adapt as necessary for your medium 🔀

# of words written or approximate hours spent making fanworks (per day/month/year etc)

Between a few chapters for my old WIP and a ton of oneshots (both already posted and some that will be published next year for a fandom event) I wrote about 36.5k words this year 🥳

2. # of works posted (on AO3/Tumblr etc)

1 updated but not finished multichapter 15 oneshots 1 poem 4 podfics 2 sets of collages 6 fanarts

3. # of fandoms you created works for

11!

4. Favorite work you created (or worked on or daydreamed about) in February

the oneshot collection I did for femslash february bingo. I didn't complete the bingo but I really like that rarepair <3

5. Favorite work you created or ^^  in April

Funnily enough, it's a fanart for the same f/f rarepair. I love the background on this one!

6. Favorite work you created or ^^ in July

The same fandom, different ship! I love love love the pose reference I got for it. Even though I haven't made any other fanworks for Code July besides this one, I love it a lot.

7. Favorite work you created or ^^ all year

Tbh I think the 2 I mentioned above are the top top favorite, but for the sake of mentioning a different fanwork, I'll point out a f/f oneshot for a rarepair in a WITCH fandom

8. Background noise or music you listened to most often this year while creating

It was either a random youtube compilations of moody aesthetic instrumentals or album "Hot Singles In Your Area" by Scene Queen on the fucking loop, nothing else.

9. Imagine the thank you video your most inspiring blorbo would make for you, their top fanwork creator. What are they saying?

I... Can image anything xD Would they be amazed or horrified? Idk lol

10. What you are most proud of yourself for as a writer/artist/creator this year

~ I tried writing in 2 more languages for the first time this year

~ I keep creating - that was actually my best year since, I think, 2017!

2024 FANWORKS WRAPPED 🔄️

I tried to make it inclusive of all fanworks and all fanwork creators - adapt as necessary for your medium 🔀

# of words written or approximate hours spent making fanworks (per day/month/year etc)

# of works posted (on AO3/Tumblr etc)

# of fandoms you created works for

Favorite work you created (or worked on or daydreamed about) in February

Favorite work you created or ^^  in April

Favorite work you created or ^^ in July

Favorite work you created or ^^ all year

Background noise or music you listened to most often this year while creating

Imagine the thank you video your most inspiring blorbo would make for you, their top fanwork creator. What are they saying?

What you are most proud of yourself for as a writer/artist/creator this year

[royalhouseofcarrington]

The Royal Family Gathers for Trooping the Color!

The entire Royal Family gathered together this afternoon for the Trooping of the Color to celebrate His Majesty’s 65th birthday and his 40th year on the throne. 

His Majesty was joined by the Queen and their 4 children and nearly all of their grandchildren, with the exception of the Lords Chandler and Nicodemo, and TH Adrien Oniojor. 

Also joining the family on the balcony were the children of the late Princess Royal, including Viscount Edward Huntington, who waved to the crowds besides his sister, Blaire. 

Princess Sophie, as well as Lady Grace Dernoi-St. Peter made their first balcony appearances. 

At the far end of the balcony, next to the Duke and Duchess of Bilchester and their family, were the Duke and Duchess of Asbury, who made their first appearance as a married couple. 

Princess Katherine, undoubtedly well aware of the scandal revolving yesterday’s news, stood slightly back, waving to the crowds in a bright red dress and matching hat. 

Official portraits to commemorate the Jubilee and His Majesty’s birthday are expected to be released later this evening.  

[ro-is-struggling]

Jealousy || Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: An undercover mission in Madripoor of all places leads to rivalry, jealousy and unexpected confessions of love.

Warnings: takes place on the events of episode 3 of tfatws, mutual pining, jealousy, Zemo being a little shit, brief mention of reader’s backstory (she worked for a thief and smuggler named Fiona before joining the avengers), reader fake-flirts with Zemo, Bucky and the reader fight and it ends in light smut (just some kisses and over the clothes stuff), fluff

English is not my first language

Word count: 6700+

Notes: this is based on a dream I had so I’m sorry if something doesn’t make sense, I wrote it in like 4 hours because I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Also I don’t usually write smut so I’m sorry if the little kiss scene at the end sucks

i love this gif so much omg

"Absolutely not. No. This is a bad idea." You exclaimed, worried as soon as you heard Zemo's plan to get information about the person responsible for the recreation of the super soldier serum. You weren't happy about having to work with him, but when Bucky insisted it was the only option you had left, you accepted it, trusting your friend's judgment. But this was something you couldn't accept. Zemo insisted that Bucky pose as the Winter Soldier for the mission ahead of you and you thought it was a terrible idea. It had taken him a lot of time and effort to get rid of his alter ego created by Hydra and it wasn't fair to ask him to play that role again. You didn't care if it was for a couple of hours, you didn't think it was a good idea to let Bucky step back into the shoes of the Winter Soldier. 

"It's the only way." Zemo tried to reason with you. "We need leverage if we want to get something from Selby."

"I can do it." Bucky spoke, making you take your intense murderous gaze off Zemo to rest your eyes on him. "He's right, doll. We need to do this. We have no choice."

"Bullshit, there's always another option." You grumbled, hoping your words would bring Bucky to his senses. "Sam, back me up here."

"She's right, Buck. We can't ask you to do this." Sam intervened, understanding the complexity of the situation. Zemo was asking him to relive his nightmares, his deepest traumas as if that was nothing. It wasn't fair and he was willing to find another way to get information if they needed it. He would never ask Bucky to do something like that for a mission.

However, he insisted that he would be okay. He assured you that he could handle it for a couple of hours and that he wouldn't be telling you that if it wasn't true. You snorted at his words, knowing full well that wasn't true. Bucky didn't always talk about what was going on with him, let alone about the things that had to do with that period of his life. Even Steve used to have trouble getting him to talk about his feelings and he was his best friend and the person he trusted the most in the whole world.

"Fine, then I'm coming with you." You said crossing your arms in a defiant pose.

"What? No, doll. It's too dangerous." Bucky was probably right, you were not a trained agent with years of experience in that kind of mission. You had joined the Avengers relatively recently, and you had spent most of that time in Wakanda with Bucky, caring for him and supporting him in the process of healing his mind. But that's why you refused to leave him alone. You had been with him in his worst moments and you weren't going to leave him now.

"I'll be fine." You shrugged. Bucky narrowed his eyes at you. He knew what you were doing and he didn't like it one bit. You were using his very logic against him in an attempt to get your way, but he wouldn't let you. At least not without giving you a fight.

"We don't have time to create a cover for you."

"You don't have to. I already have a reputation around here thanks to my… past activities." You weren't lying and Bucky knew it, defeat written all over his face. He tensed his jaw, pursing his lips into a thin line as he struggled to find an excuse to justify his stance. You gave him a smile, feigning innocence and he rolled his eyes.

"Really?" Zemo asked with surprise and you nodded.

"I used to work with Fiona." The mention of the woman's name was all Zemo needed to understand what you meant. Fiona was a well-known dealer of valuable artifacts who excelled at working for whoever paid her the most. She had raised you, treating you as if you were her own daughter, and had trained you—along with other kids your age—to steal for her. You had lived under her care and protection until you had crossed paths with Steve on a mission. He had made you reflect and realize that Fiona was just using you and that you deserved something much better. Shortly after that you joined the Avengers and got to know what a family really was. 

"So it's settled then.” Zemo spoke again, interrupting the silent fight you were having with Bucky through simple glances. “We all have a part to play so I'll suggest we get to work."

Everyone spent the next few hours going over the plan and getting into character. Sam had the most work to do out of everyone, having to learn as much as he could about the Smiling Tiger in just a couple of hours in order to present a convincing characterization. Zemo and you didn't have to do much due to the fact that you wouldn't be taking on anyone else's personality. And Bucky chose to seclude himself from everyone, sitting in a corner, quietly observing the scene. It was part of his characterization process, mimicking the movement patterns of his hated alter ego. 

When your eyes fell upon his figure you were momentarily startled, noticing how much he resembled the Winter Soldier. His body stood rigid, his posture straight and the muscles of his face contoured into a slight frown. But when you looked into his eyes you realized it was Bucky. His beautiful blue orbs showed emotion, something the Winter Soldier's gaze lacked. It hurt you to see him in that state. You wanted to go up to him and hug him, spread kisses all over his face until he had no choice but to smile, but you stopped yourself. He had gotten himself into that mess and now it was too late to back out. Besides, if you listened to what your heart wanted all you would do was expose your feelings for Bucky, and you weren't ready for that yet.

As the sun began to set everyone started to get dressed, changing out of your dirty combat clothes into attire appropriate for the occasion. Sam complained the whole time, mentioning that he looked like a pimp. You laughed at him until Zemo approached you with clothes he thought were appropriate for you. All amusement disappeared from your face as you refused to wear such a short and tight outfit, arguing that you didn't have to keep up appearances because you would be going as yourself. Then he revealed to you the little detail he had been planning from the moment you said you would join them. Zemo wanted you to pretend to be his date.

"That is ridiculous!" You laughed in his face. "No way! I'm not going to be around you for longer than necessary."

"Well, I think it's the perfect cover and it explains the rumors of you leaving Fiona to work with the Avengers." The laughter died in your throat when you heard those words. You didn't know the rumors had spread so far. Did Fiona have been badmouthing you in front of her clients?

"How exactly does that explain anything?"

"Simple, my darling. You left Fiona for me and all this time you've been working as a double agent just to help me get my hands on the Winter Soldier." You looked at Zemo for a few seconds, refusing to admit that his plan made sense. There was no way you would agree to pretend you were dating. You'd rather risk being discovered first.

"That's ridiculous. No one is going to care about me."

"Selby is a very paranoid person. That's why it's so important that we all play our roles to perfection." You rolled your eyes, grumbling in frustration. You knew Zemo was doing it on purpose. He wanted to annoy you, he enjoyed annoying others. He was an expert in the art of manipulation and you were convinced there was nothing he loved more than getting under people's skin. He did it with Bucky all the time and now he was trying it with you.

You hated him and were ready to tell him to go to hell if it wasn't for Bucky's voice interrupting you.

"Well, you said you wanted to come so…" You looked at him with narrowed eyes. What was that supposed to mean? Was he implying that you weren't ready for a mission like that? Because if that was the case you were happy to prove him wrong.

"Fine." You accepted reluctantly, taking the hideous outfit Zemo had offered you before disappearing behind the bathroom door.

You didn't know what had gotten into you. You didn't use to be a competitive person, but now all you could think about was proving to everyone how capable you were. Especially Bucky. Sure, maybe you weren't a Shield agent with years of experience like Natasha nor did you have incredible powers like Wanda, but you were still capable of participating in missions. You knew how to maintain a character to get what you wanted, Fiona had molded you to be the perfect thief. This wasn't your first risky mission and it wouldn't be your last either. 

You didn't quite understand why Bucky's words had affected you so much, but you felt a strange need to prove your worth to him. Maybe it was because you wanted to impress him. Or maybe you wanted to show him that you belonged in that world as much as he did. A little voice in the back of your mind told you that you were looking to make him jealous, but you shut it up immediately, burying it deep inside you. No, that was ridiculous. You were there to do your job and show Bucky that he wasn't the only one who could take risks without a second thought, and that if he didn't like it when you did it then he should stop doing it himself.

You spent the trip to the bar sitting in the back seat of the car, squeezed between Sam and Bucky while Zemo rode in the front. You were uncomfortable, not because of the small space in the car—seriously, how did Bucky manage to be so big?—, but because of the outfit you were wearing. The black dress Zemo had given you was much tighter and more revealing than your normal clothes, and the high heels, though pretty, hurt your feet. You fiddled nervously with the seam of the dress, stretching the fabric in an effort to make it cover more than half of your thighs.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Bucky's voice whispering in your ear startled you. He had spent the entire drive in silence, watching the streets of Madripoor through the tinted windows of the car, so you didn't expect to hear him speak.

"Are you?" You glanced up looking at him through your lashes and arching an eyebrow defiantly. You wanted to prove a point and you wouldn't stop until you did.

Bucky clenched his jaw, holding back the urgent need to cover you with his jacket and take you to a safe place. He knew you were uncomfortable, he could read it in your face and body language. He knew you too well and was able to read past your defiant and confident attitude. But you didn't want to give in, so he remained silent. His eyes scanned your figure one last time, lingering a little longer than necessary on your exposed thighs, before returning his gaze to the car window. 

When you reached your destination, Zemo immediately put his arms around your figure, drawing you to him. Bucky found it hard to maintain a neutral expression when all he wanted to do was take you in his arms and snap Zemo's fingers for daring to touch you. He managed to restrain himself, clenching his fists at the side of his body in anger. The bar was packed with people, hundreds of eyes settling on you as soon as you entered the establishment. He had to try hard to maintain his character no matter how much he hated being in that position.

There was a tension in the air as you made your way to the bar to order drinks. You could hear the whispers, people surprised to see Zemo, others wondering if that tall, strong man was truly the infamous Winter Soldier and a couple mentioning Fiona's name in the distance. You hated it. You hated being associated with her after all you had done to change your life. But you kept your cool, walking hand in hand with Zemo feigning happiness.

It's for the mission.

You settled in at the bar, waiting to be served. You scanned the room for potential threats and escape routes in case things went wrong. When your eyes fell on Bucky you noticed he was doing the same. His expression was rigid, but you could still see some of your Bucky in him. You were sure that to the rest of the people there was no difference, but you were able to notice it. Maybe it was because you had already seen the Winter Soldier a couple of times, the coldness in his eyes and the firmness in his stance something that was not easily forgotten. Or maybe it was because you spent more time than necessary admiring Bucky in secret, to the point where you were able to recognize his mood changes with a simple glance. Whatever it was, you were slightly relieved to see the humanity in his eyes, though not enough to completely erase your concern. You knew it couldn't be good for his mental health to get back into the Winter Soldier's mindset. You just hoped it would at least be worth it.

"Hello gentlemen. Miss." The man behind the bar greeted them with a slight nod. "Wasn't expecting you, Smiling Tiger."

"His plans changed. We have business to do with Selby." Zemo was quick to say, taking control of the conversation.

"The usual?" The man asked Sam and he nodded without giving it much thought. That was until the bartender took a snake from a jar, cutting the animal to take who knows what from inside it and add it to the drink.

"Ah Smiling Tiger, your favorite!" Zemo exclaimed, amused by the situation. A silence fell between you as you watched Sam horrified by the drink that had been placed in front of him. He looked at you for a moment and you tried to give him an encouraging smile.

"I love these!" Sam said in an attempt to hide the horror in his expression and convince himself that the drink wasn't so bad. After hesitating for a moment, buying himself time to mentally prepare, Sam drank his shot in one big gulp. You felt proud of him, if it were you in his place you weren't sure you could do that without throwing up.

After that scene you decided not to drink anything, so you turned your back to the bar and concentrated your gaze on the crowd of people. There was still a certain tension in the air and there were a couple of people who kept their eyes on you, but overall things were back to normal. People drinking and dancing on the dance floor, swaying their hips to the music without paying attention to their surroundings. 

That was except for one man who didn't seem to be able to turn his gaze away from you. His eyes were fixed on Zemo, occasionally straying to the others, but always coming back to him. You wondered what he wanted, though you didn't need any specific details to know that he was trouble. You wanted to warn the others, but it was a difficult task when that man wouldn't take his eyes off you. You didn't want to be too obvious for fear that it would escalate the situation somehow, so you opted to stick to your role. 

Wrapping your arms around your supposed boyfriend, you positioned yourself in front of Zemo, settling your body between his and the bar. His hands traveled to your hips immediately, pressing you against him. He gave you a charming smile and you had to fight every fiber in your being not to roll your eyes. You pulled your face closer towards his, your breaths mingling and noses almost brushing. To anyone else it looked like you were about to kiss. You could have sworn you noticed a hint of surprise in Zemo's eyes at your sudden boldness, convinced you were going to kiss him.

But that was not your goal. At the last moment you turned your face to the side and with a mischievous smile whispered in his ear. "There's a guy staring at us." Your hands ran up his chest until you found a place on his neck. Your fingers fiddled with the ends of Zemo's hair, trying to keep up appearances so no one would get suspicious.“I think he wants trouble.” Your lips brushed his earlobe as you spoke and you felt him shiver. You pulled away with a triumphant smile, returning your attention to his face.

“And you want to put up a show for him, my darling?” Zemo spoke in a playful tone with an arrogant smile planted on his face.

"I'm just warning you because I don't want this mission to go to shit." You murmured against his lips, your grip on his hair tightening menacingly. "He could kill you for all I care, but we still need you so I'd rather you stay alive for a couple more hours." Despite the coldness of your words, Zemo's smile only widened. You wanted to slap him to wipe that arrogant expression off his face, but you restrained yourself because you saw that someone was approaching out of the corner of your eye. "He's coming." You warned before releasing Zemo and returning to your position next to him, between his body and Sam.

Your eyes searched Bucky for a brief moment, embarrassed that you had to do that little number in front of him. His gaze was fixed somewhere on the horizon. He was tense, you could tell by his stiff expression and the position of his shoulders, although you didn't know if it was due to the situation in general or to what you had just done. You hoped it wasn't because of the latter, you didn't want him to get mad at you for fake-flirting with Zemo. Though the way he avoided your gaze told you otherwise.

"I got word from on high, you ain't welcome here." The voice of that mysterious man brought you out of your thoughts.

"I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists he can either come talk to me," said Zemo gesturing towards Bucky in an implied threat. "Or bring Selby for a chat." The man walked away after keeping his gaze on Zemo for a few seconds longer than necessary. You let out the breath you hadn't realized you were holding, relieved that the situation hadn't escalated. For a moment you really thought things wouldn't end in violence, at least not this early in the mission. But then another man approached you and this time Zemo ordered the Winter Soldier to attack him. 

You bit your tongue to keep from letting out a startled yelp as you watched Bucky deliver the first blows. He was acting in a way you hadn't seen him act in a long time, using his metal arm on his opponent to generate more damage. You knew he was acting, using a couple of key moves to fool everyone in the bar, but it still hurt to watch. Your stomach sank as you watched him fight multiple people at once, seemingly indifferent to the damage he might be causing them. In the frenzy of the fight you couldn't see Bucky's eyes, you couldn't notice in them his special characteristic glow that attracted you so much, so you had no way of distinguishing him from the Winter Soldier. 

It saddened you because you knew Bucky would feel bad when all this was over. You were sure that with every blow he delivered he was reliving something from his past, memories that would haunt his thoughts for a long time. It broke your heart to think about it. All you wanted to do was run to him and force him to stop, wrap him in your arms and not let go until the bad moment was over, but you restrained yourself.

"Didn't take much for him to fall back into form." Zemo said while watching the fight. You and Sam gave him murderous looks, silently blaming him for the situation your friend was in. 

When Bucky grabbed his opponent by the throat, dragging him to the bar to strangle him, everyone in the bar pulled out their guns, ready to shoot you. Sam grabbed Bucky by the arm in an attempt to stop him, but Zemo interrupted him. "Stay in character or the whole bar turns on us." He whispered before ordering Bucky to release the man.

"Selby will see you now."

Things went off the rails so quickly that you barely had time to react. Not that they were very on track to begin with, but they weren't too bad. Selby believed your stupid story about infiltrating the Avengers in order to get to the Winter Soldier and gave you some interesting details when you offered to hand him over in exchange for information. You hated referring to Bucky as if he were an object, a weapon you just had to aim to hurt your enemies, but you put up with it because Selby gave you a new piece of the puzzle. However, before you could finish negotiating with her, Sam's cell phone started ringing and everything went downhill from there. 

She discovered that Sam was an imposter, but before she could hurt him, she was shot dead. You escaped the scene before being found and blamed for her fate, but it wasn't enough. From one second to the next you found yourselves running through the streets of Madripoor, escaping the hail of bullets aimed at you. In the midst of the chaos, a bullet grazed your leg causing you to stumble and fall. Luckily for you, it hadn't hit any major arteries, although there was more blood coming out of the wound than you would have liked. Bucky rushed to your rescue, taking the weapon from your attacker and knocking him unconscious with a single blow. He then helped you up and you took the opportunity to get rid of the high heels that were hurting your feet before standing up. They were probably worth a lot of money, but that was the least of your worries at that moment. Your life depended on your ability to run and move freely, so you didn't hesitate for a second to leave them forgotten in the middle of the street.

'Good luck to whoever finds them.' You thought as you walked away leaning on Bucky so you wouldn't fall. 

Sharon saved your life at that moment, appearing suddenly in the dark street where you were seeking cover. It took some convincing to get her to help you, seeing as you were working with Zemo, but in the end she agreed. She took you to her house—a mansion filled with stolen art—, where you could rest and process the information you had obtained. While everyone was talking, you collapsed on the couch pressing a cloth over your wound to stop the bleeding. Sharon left you a first aid kit on the coffee table before disappearing behind the doors to get everything ready for her clients. The others followed her, except for Bucky who stayed with you to help you.

Sitting on the opposite end of the couch, he removed your hands from your leg and stretched it across his lap so he could examine the wound more closely. As soon as his fingers made contact with your skin, a shiver ran down your spine. You watched him work in silence, admiring his face in the warm light of the room. His hands brushed your leg gently, cleaning and disinfecting the wound before stitching it. His metal hand was a little cold, but you didn't care. All you could think about was how much you loved feeling him so close. For a moment all the pain disappeared from your body as you relished in the warmth his touch awakened on your skin. 

However, even though his touch was gentle you couldn't help but notice the frown that graced his face. It was as if his hands and his expression were demonstrating two completely different emotions, as if they were not part of the same person. You bit your lower lip nervously as you wondered what thoughts were running through his mind. You had an idea of what he might be thinking, so you tried to strike up a conversation in hopes that he would open up to you as he had done many times in the past.

"Are you okay?" Your soft voice broke the silence of the room. Bucky looked up from the bandages he was placing on your leg to look at you for a moment before nodding.

"Yeah, I'm alright." He assured you even though his voice and expression told you otherwise. Bucky sounded... cold, distant, and for a moment you wondered if you had anything to do with it.

"Are you sure?" You insisted and he nodded again, lowering his gaze to continue his work. You remained silent for a few seconds, until the silence seemed unbearable. "Are you mad at me?"

"No, I'm not mad at you, doll." Bucky said, closing the first aid kit as he finished bandaging your leg. "I'm just frustrated."

"Frustrated?" You repeated with confusion. That was something you didn't expect to hear him say. Why would he be frustrated? Was it because of the mission and having to work with Zemo? Or was it because Selby had died before she could give them any more information?

"I told you it was dangerous. You shouldn't have come with us." He said in a firm tone, confusing you even more.

"I wasn't going to leave you guys alone. We're a team."

"You could have died, Y/N!" His voice was serious and in his eyes you were able to sense genuine concern. "I shouldn't have let you come."

"Excuse me?" You spoke in a surprised tone, watching Bucky with raised eyebrows. "Let's get one thing straight, you don't let me do anything. I'm a big girl and I can make my own choices." The mood in the room changed completely, the tension getting increasingly heavier in the air. You were glad to know that he cared about you, but he was in no position to dictate your actions. You were free to decide how and when to risk your life if that was what you wanted to do, just as he repeatedly did. If you didn't have a say in his decisions then why should he have a say in yours?

"If that bullet curved a few more inches you could have bled out in the streets." 

"You could have died too! They were shooting at you too, you know."

"I can take it." Bucky shrugged it off and you rolled your eyes. You were tired of him doing that.

"Well, so can I. I'm perfectly fine, see." You jumped up from the couch, but immediately regretted it when a twinge of pain assaulted your wound. You tried hard not to show it, though you were pretty sure Bucky was able to notice your discomfort anyway. "You have to understand that you are not the only one that can risk his life without even thinking about the consequences." 

"You're unbelievable!" He exclaimed, shaking his head.

"I'm unbelievable? What about you?"

"You risked your life just to prove a point?"

"No, I risked my life because my friends were risking theirs." It was a half-truth. A part of you had decided to go because there was no way you were going to leave them alone with Zemo in a bar in Madripoor. But another part of you had done it for Bucky, to show him that you were capable of going on missions, but more importantly, to make him understand how frustrating it was for you when he took risks without even thinking about the consequences. Although you weren't going to admit that last part. "You know what? I'm too tired for this shit. I'm not gonna keep arguing with you about it." 

You began to walk toward the door with some difficulty. You intended to leave him alone, to stay away from him until you both calmed down and could talk like civilized people. But Bucky opened his mouth again, blurting out a comment you couldn't ignore.

"That's right, run off to your new boyfriend. He's probably waiting for you downstairs." You stopped dead in your tracks when you heard him say that. So that's what his bad mood was about. He was all grumpy and bitter because he was upset about Zemo. Unbelievable!

"You know what? Maybe I will!" You exclaimed in exasperation, turning to look at him. Bucky had his arms crossed over his chest, muscles flexing deliciously. You wanted to slap him because it wasn't fair that he looked so good while you were fighting. "At least Zemo doesn't act like a complete asshole."

You turned and continued on your way, reaching the door and taking the handle in your hands. You barely managed to separate the wood from the frame a couple inches before it closed again with a loud thud. You flinched in surprise and when you looked up you discovered Bucky's metal hand resting on the door just above your head. How had he reached you so quickly and so silently, you didn't know. All you knew was that he had done it and didn't seem to want to move. 

You pulled on the doorknob once more, but the door didn't budge under the pressure Bucky was exerting on the wood. So you turned to look at him one more time and if you weren't so upset you were sure the air would have caught in your throat at the closeness. "Bucky, let me go." You protested, but before you could say anything else the super soldier's lips crashed against yours.

There was nothing soft or gentle about the kiss. Bucky's lips moved desperately against yours, his tongue exploring your mouth curiously. His right hand cupped your face while his metal one wrapped around your waist, pulling you even closer to him. It took you a few seconds to comprehend what was happening, but when you did you kissed him back with the same fervor, losing yourself in the warmth of his body. Your hands found their place in his hair, tugging lightly on the dark locks in a desperate attempt to pull his face even closer to yours to deepen the kiss. Bucky let out a soft growl and you felt your pulse quicken. Holy shit, he was hot.

"You were killing me in there, doll." Bucky muttered, pulling away from you to catch his breath. His voice was deeper than normal and you loved it, every word that came out of his mouth went straight to your core. "Letting him touch you and pull you close, acting like you were his." His lips trailed down your neck leaving a path of wet kisses across your skin. You tilted your head to the side to give him better access, closing your eyes as you lost yourself in the heat his touch aroused inside you. You were completely at his mercy, letting him mark you as his. 

"Bucky…" you moaned his name as he sucked a mark on the sensitive area just below your ear. "Please." You didn't even know what you were begging for. Your brain had stopped working, overwhelmed by the attack of Bucky's lips on your skin. He was all you could think about, all you could smell and feel. His scent assaulted your nostrils and the heat of his body enveloped you completely. But somehow that wasn't enough. You wanted more, so much more. And so did he.

“What?” Bucky spoke against your lips, your quickened, choppy breath mingling with his. You looked up at him through your lashes and in his eyes you noticed something you had never seen in them before. He was looking at you with desire, his pupils slightly dilated as he admired your face in the dim light of the room. “You wanna go with him, huh? Is that it, doll?”

He was teasing you. He knew there was nothing you wanted more than to feel his lips on yours again, he could read it in your eyes, feel it in the way your hands clung to his shoulders, desperately trying to pull him closer to you. But he wanted to hear you say it. He wanted to hear you say that you wanted him and no one else, that his hands were the only ones you wanted on your body and that his lips were the only ones allowed to kiss you. He wanted confirmation that he wasn't the only one who felt that way. 

So you gave him what he wanted.

“I want you, Bucky. It’s always been you.” 

Your brain was short-circuiting so you couldn't put into words everything you really felt for Bucky. There was so much more you wanted to tell him, but you didn't have the ability to do so now when your legs were shaking, threatening to drop you to the ground if Bucky's metal arm wasn't holding you up by his grip on your waist.

However, your little confession seemed to be enough for him as he brought his lips back to join yours. You let out a desperate moan at the contact, reveling in the softness of his lips. When Bucky rested his hands on the back of your thighs, you jumped without a second thought. The pain of your injury was forgotten as you locked your legs around his hips, clinging to his broad shoulders for support. His lips never left yours as he used his big, muscular body to trap you against the door, your tongues intertwining in a sinful dance. 

You could feel him. All of him. His chest pressed against yours, the muscles of his back flexing with every little movement, his hands pressing you against the outline of his growing erection. You got drunk on him as you kissed, trying to memorize every detail of his body and the way it felt to be trapped in his arms. You wanted more. You needed more. Your center throbbed with desperation so you moved your hips in search of some friction. Bucky's chest vibrated with a low moan, his hands gripping your ass tighter before pulling away from the door.

He walked with you in his arms until he reached the couch, where he carefully dropped down without taking his lips off yours. You straddled his lap with one leg on either side of his thighs, his hands gripping your waist. The new angle allowed you to feel him in a different way. Your short dress had ridden up even higher, exposing your covered center. Bucky settled back on the couch and you let out a slight moan at the subtle brush of his pelvis against yours. Your skin was on fire and so was his. You let your hands travel down his body under his shirt, trailing your fingers over every inch of skin you were able to reach until Bucky had enough and decided to remove his shirt. 

When his chest was exposed you trailed your wet kisses down his neck, sucking and biting his skin as a way of marking your territory, just as he had done with you seconds before. Bucky tightened his grip on your waist as he pulled his head back to give you more room to continue your assault on his body. He was enjoying being claimed as yours more than he would like to admit, letting out a series of incoherent moans each time you sucked on his sensitive parts. 

In the heat of the moment, your fingers brushed over the scars on his left shoulder and a couple of seconds later your lips made contact with the area, spreading kisses all over his skin. You started at his left collarbone, moving slowly towards his shoulder until your lips made contact with the metal, and then you moved back up. These kisses were different from the rest. They were not wet and desperate, but slow and full of love. They were a silent way of showing him how deep your feelings for him were. A way to tell him you wanted more than a one night stand with him without having to use words.

Bucky opened his eyes as he noticed the change in the mood. And when he saw you there, showing love to one of the parts of his body he hated the most, his heart squeezed in his chest. A wave of heat washed over him, but it wasn't lust or jealousy as he had previously felt. This time it was love. Love that coursed through his whole body, filling him with that euphoric feeling he didn't think he would ever be able to feel again after all he had been through. 

And then he knew he could no longer deny what he felt. 

Bucky pulled you off his chest, lifting your face so he could look into your eyes. His flesh hand caressed your cheek, delighting in the way you closed your eyes and leaned into his touch. He slid his fingers delicately across your skin until he reached your chin. When you opened your eyes again you found his intense gaze locked on your lips. His thumb gently caressed your lower lip before his eyes focused on yours again.

"I love you." It was barely a whisper, as if he was afraid to say those words out loud. But you heard it and your heart burst with joy at the confirmation that your feelings were reciprocated. 

You took his hand between yours, bringing it to your lips to place a delicate kiss on the back of it, a subtle way to calm his nerves. His eyes followed your every move, admiring your face as he waited for a response. "I love you too." You whispered before joining your lips again, only this time it was in a slow kiss charged with love and affection.

It was the kind of kiss you always imagined sharing with him, your lips moving together in perfect harmony as you allowed yourself just to feel. Feel the love you had fought so hard to suppress. Feel the intimacy of the moment and the sheer bliss that came over you at the proximity. Feel how well your lips seemed to fit together, like two pieces of a puzzle, and how right it was. Feel the true extent of your connection.

"Ah finally! Seems like everything worked out according to plan." Zemo's voice forced you to separate. According to plan? "I'm glad, I was getting tired of the sexual tension in the air whenever you to where in the same room. I would love to leave you alone to… continue this, but Sam is looking for you."

Without another word, Zemo disappeared behind the door leaving you looking at each other in confusion. So that had been his plan all along, huh? You couldn't say you were mad at him. Yes, maybe the manipulation and mind games were annoying, but at least this time they had worked in your favor.

[angstama]

apple tree | chifuyu.m

pairing: chifuyu matsuno x reader

genre: angst, slow-burn, unrequited love, pining, fluff, chifuyu doesn’t love you that way :( 

warnings: as usual, heartbreak coming ahead <3

✧. in which you look back on the times that chifuyu had been the highlight and heartbreaker in your youth. 

you were five when you first met chifuyu matsuno under the big apple tree one summer day. 

head deep into bending the fragile weeds into a flower crown when a blonde haired boy with the prettiest ocean blue eyes approached you. “what are you doing?” he asked curiously, licking his already melting chocolate ice cream while looking at the imperfectly balanced flower that you had spent hours on crafting in your hands. “making a flower crown.” you answered simply, not even sparing the blonde haired boy a glance as you were too focused in tweaking the branches. 

“woah that’s awesome!” he beamed in excitement, plopping down next to you instantly and leaning in closer to take a look at it. “yeah i know right!” you smiled in triumph, finally looking up to see whoever was showing interest in your little hobby and behold, there sat chifuyu in a rainbow striped t-shirt with his legs crossed and eyes gleaming with interest.

 in all honesty, your flower crowns were horribly ugly, but in chifuyu’s eyes it was uniquely you. perhaps it was maybe because he hadn’t seen anyone making an actual flower crown before or perhaps maybe he was just feeling sorry for the girl who always sat alone under the big apple tree that never bloomed a single fruit all year round. whichever it was, you wished that it was the first. “teach me how to make one please!” he grabs your wrist, causing your cheeks to burn under the scorching hot sun and heart rate quickening though you were clueless as to why it happened being only at the age of five, so you decided that it was okay to have him around. 

strangely ever since then, you were never seen alone under the apple tree in the park again. 

you were nine when you first understood the concept of crushes, with the help of your best friend, chifuyu matsuno of course. 

“it’s when you want to share the biggest chicken drumlet with them dummy!” chifuyu explained, voice muffled from stuffing his face with fried chicken one after another. you weren’t sure how the two of you derived at the current topic, though you remember the last you checked, chifuyu was rambling on and on about the new girl in your class. “so, you’d share this with whoever you have a crush on?” you asked as you pointed towards the biggest drumstick that chifuyu had saved for the last, as always. 

he nodded impatiently, grabbing the very same drumstick and ready to devour it but only to come to a halt when the two of you locked eyes. “want some?” he offered, waving the fried chicken in front of you. “wh-what?” your words fumbled, taken aback by chifuyu’s sudden offer right after the whole sharing of the biggest chicken drumlet explanation he had just made. “you kept staring at it. do you want it?” he asked, with innocence laced in his voice, oblivious to the shade of red slowly making an appearance on your cheeks. you huffed, “am not!”. chifuyu only lets out a snort, “yeah sure,” he chuckles boyishly, leaning down to rest on your shoulders, causing your body to stiffen upon the sudden contact. that afternoon, for almost an entire hour you were forced to sit as straight as you could, afraid that something was going to erupt in your tummy again as you could feel the bubbling sensation that threatened to explode. 

you were thirteen when you finally realised that you, y/n l/n, wants to share the biggest drumstick with chifuyu matsuno. 

it was christmas eve and chifuyu had invited you over to his place for a dinner, claiming that his mother had threatened to throw his precious romance mangas away if he didn't invite you. 

you arrived at the matsuno’s household ten minutes earlier than stated with a tray of roasted potatoes held in your hands and beads of sweat running down your forehead despite the freezing cold temperature outside. for the eight years of friendship you had with chifuyu, you’ve never felt this nervous seeing him and his family. it’s the cold, you naively thought, when the door swung opened, revealing your best friend dressed in a maroon striped sweater with suspenders. his eyes widened, not expecting to really see you when he was just opening to check in an attempt to ease his mother’s sixth sense. “y/n? why didn’t you knock?” he gasped, gently tugging the tray on your hands into his as he looked at you in surprise. “well, i was gonna but you opened the door before i could!” you scoffed a white lie, wanting nothing but to cover up the fact that you had been standing outside because you couldn’t get your heart to calm down. 

“chifuyu why don’t you give y/n the gift you got for her now?” mrs matsuno chimed, elegance evident in her posture and movement when she lightly dabbed a napkin across her lips which made you wonder how is it possible that she's the mother of chifuyu when chifuyu shared not a single bit of her grace when it comes to eating. chifuyu pauses briefly, “give me a sec,” he nods before stuffing the roasted potato that was previously halfway into his mouth and standing up to jog over to his room. “he cleaned the house for two months for it.” mr matsuno chuckled as chifuyu jogs out again, this time with a paper bag held in his hand. 

“you better wear it everyday.” he sent you a playful wink, handing you the brown paper bag. you carefully unwrapped the ribbon that bounded the paper bag and pulling out an overly oversized hoodie enough to fit you through a lifetime. you noticed that it was same hoodie that chifuyu often wears except that yours was in the shade of emerald green, the colour that chifuyu had taken the effort to remember that you had once claimed as your colour when the two of you had a heated discussion on what colour represents yourselves. 

“wow! now we have a friendship hoodie!” you beamed in excitement, pulling the oversized hoodie over your sweater. “how do i look?” you asked, posing a few turns at chifuyu as he took a good look at you. “pretty.” he held a thumb up before stuffing another spoonful of pasta down. 

your lowered your gaze upon hearing the sudden compliment your best friend gave, opting to look at the last piece of roasted chicken that mrs matsuno had offered you earlier just now before chifuyu could lay his hands on it. your lips pursed, not entirely confident to do it but eventually picking up the piece of meat and placing it on chifuyu’s already dirtied plate from all the sauces he had mixed with his food. “thank you,” you mumbled, looking anywhere else but chifuyu’s burning gaze on you. 

the butterflies were taking flight soon and you on the other hand had no idea how to contain it. 

you were sixteen when chifuyu first broke your heart on the first day of the spring season, openly declaring in front of you and takemichi that he’ll be confessing to the pretty girl sitting in front of him during lunch time. 

her name is haru.

“no way! you’re kidding!” takemichi gaped, leaning in closer to chifuyu as the close proximity between the two of them wasn’t enough for him to hear chifuyu clearly. chifuyu crossed his arms, confidence evident in his posture, “of course not! i’ve already decided, there’s no going back!” 

“be sure not to scare her away!” you stuck your tongue out to which chifuyu rolled his eyes in response. “eh? you’re just jealous that no one’s confessing to you!”, wiggling his head in a playful manner as he brought an ‘L’ sign up to his forehead to further anguish you. you raised a middle finger, wanting nothing more than to end this conversation for you weren’t sure if you were able to contain the effect of your heart dropping six feet down. 

you knew chifuyu succeeded when he came running to you after school with the brightest smile you adored, a faint tint of blush coated on his cheeks. “guess i’m gonna see you lesser huh lover boy?” you chuckled softly, shoving your textbooks into your canvas bag as he swung himself onto your desk with a smug grin. “you’d wish huh don’t you? but no, you’ll still see me as often when i’m off from boyfriend duties,” he sang happily. perhaps maybe because it was chifuyu’s own words, you believed wholeheartedly that you were okay with being just his best friend and being supportive of his relationship. so you watched chifuyu’s love for haru bloomed into something more than just the typical puppy love you often watch on romcoms. 

in just a blink of an eye, two years had passed and the next thing you knew you were spending your birthday without your best friend for the second time in a row. “this sucks,” you grumbled, throwing your phone aside when the time struck midnight, announcing a new day had just arrived. chifuyu’s words were just empty affirmations when you realised that you barely ever saw your best friend. you weren't sure if the two of you were even best friends anymore. it felt more like he’s just a friend that you talk to occasionally now. you see, chifuyu is a loyal friend and that’s a widely known fact and that’s what made it even more heartbreaking for you because chifuyu always does just enough to keep your friendship alive and you had no reason to hate him for that. 

you rubbed your temples tiredly, wanting nothing more than to run your aching head into the wall when a packet of your favourite watermelon mints was thrown onto your desk. “rough night?”atsumu, your beloved table-mate asked smugly. “you don’t say,” you mumbled, rolling your eyes at the obvious as you impatiently tore the packet open. “he didn’t wish ya happy birthday did he?” the freshly bleached haired boy questioned. atsumu got his answer when you didn't sat in silence, opting to look out the window to distract yourself from the threatening tears prickling at the corner of your eyes. and god do love to test you when the scene of chifuyu leaning in to kiss haru on the lips ever so gently unfolds at your sight. oh how you wished that it was you who he’s kissing right now. 

chifuyu always does just enough to keep your friendship alive. 

it was already late into the night when you heard a knock outside your balcony. your breath hitched when you saw that it was chifuyu who had disturbed your little movie marathon alone after the events that had happened lately. “hey,” he breathed, a soft smile wearing on his lips to which you returned it with an awkward one, inviting him into your messy room. “oh we’re in our friendship hoodie!” he chuckles nervously. your eyes travelled on him, realising that indeed he’s wearing the same hoodie that you were currently wearing right now. “it’s late chi, what’s going on?” you sighed, tone coming off harsher than you intended to. chifuyu nods slowly, face soon replaced with an apologetic look. “i’m sorry for missing your birthday, i feel horrible really,” he begun. “ i know i haven’t been around lately, so i want to make it up to you.” 

your brows furrowed at chifuyu’s apology, you knew he was being so sincere so why did you feel even much more upset hearing it? “that’s it? you could’ve just done this in school tomorrow chifuyu.”you sighed, trying your hardest to mask the pettiness within you with a tired voice. “ i know i know, but i couldn’t sleep knowing that i left my best friend alone on her 18th birthday.” he looked at you hesitantly as you quietly pulled your duvet over your lap. “how about let’s go hiking and watch the sunrise this weekend? just the two of us. i know you’ve been wanting to do that.” 

you wished you weren’t in love with chifuyu so that you wouldn’t give in so easily. you wished you were petty enough to make a scene and just be angry at him but you couldn't so here you are right now, hiking up the trail with your hand in chifuyu’s as you helped him up the slope. “your stamina really sucks,” you retorted to which chifuyu huffed in response. “it’s not that my stamina sucks, it’s that this trail is literally ninety-eight percent high slopes,” he pouts. 

“well you could've chose not to show up.” 

“no! i want to do this with you. what are you talking about?” 

you only smiled at his little defence. “whatever,” you mumbled as you quickly dropped your grip on his and walking ahead of him in an attempt to hide your blush. “hey! wait for me!” 

it was near autumn when one day chifuyu appeared in the wee hours of the night with tears streaming down his cheeks when he fell into your arms and hugged you tightly. you found out that haru was moving away to the states with her family and had broken up with chifuyu, refusing to try out long distance relationship. 

so like any other best friend, you let chifuyu cry into your shoulders as you sat in silence that night, heart breaking at the torn state chifuyu was in. he truly loved her. 

you were twenty when chifuyu held your hands and asked you to be his. 

“chifuyu matsuno! where the hell are my batteries?” your voice echoed through your shared apartment, causing poor chifuyu to jump and drop the eggs he was previously holding in his hands on to the floor. it’s been almost two years since haru and chifuyu had broken up and you had spent a great deal of time trying to mend his broken heart though you knew that it would never be fully healed. she was his first love after all. 

the two of you had moved in to a small apartment close to your university as planned since young, officially becoming roommates. “fuck!my eggs!” chifuyu cried out loud as he frantically lets go of the spatula in his hands to grab a kitchen tower and clean up the pool of egg yolk and egg white on the marble floor. you groaned in annoyance when chifuyu doesn’t answer your question, slamming the tools drawer shut and making your way towards the kitchen. 

“i swear chi-” you paused when you saw chifuyu kneeling on the floor with his pink kitten design apron tied against his body, a pout clearly evident on his lips. “what ever happened?” your head tilted slightly, annoyance slowly decimating. “you screamed like a mad woman. that’s what happened.” he retorted. you rolled your eyes, grabbing another kitchen towel and joining chifuyu on the ground. “well if you didn’t misplace my batteries, i wouldn't be screaming.” 

“if you looked close enough, it’s literally on your study desk.” 

“it’s not!” 

“it is!” 

“it’s not!” you huffed, getting up and stomping over to your room to prove a point but your eyes widened, horrified by the pure sight of your batteries accompanies by a fresh pack with a sticky note attached on top of it. ‘you’re welcome <3′, it wrote. you slowly walked out of your room with your head hung low, doing the walk of shame. “say it,” chifuyu taunts as he skilfully tossed the omelette onto the plate and placing it in front of you. you scrunched your nose, lips pursing and taking a deep breath. “i’m sorry,” you mumbled quietly, fingers fumbling at the ends of your shirt. “ah-ah i can't hear you,” you hear him sing, a little too happy. obvious that he’s enjoying this. you sighed in defeat, clearing your throat loud enough. “i’m sorry,” you said it loudly this time. 

chifuyu lets out a laugh in satisfaction, throwing his head back while you on the other hand could only pout at his triumph. but that didn’t mean that your heart didn't swell up at the expression of happiness he has on his face right now. digging in at the breakfast that chifuyu had made for you which had now became a routine, you couldn't help but to feel small under chifuyu’s intense stare on you. “are you not gonna eat?” you raised your brow, eyeing the untouched omelette on his plate. chifuyu rests his chin on his palm, looking at you with a look of as if he had something to tell you. 

“i will.” he hummed before reaching out to grab your hands. your body stiffened, dumfounded at what’s currently happening. “you know, for the last two years, life was a little less painful thanks to you.” chifuyu confessed earnestly, “ i guess what i’m trying to say is that, you’re my end game y/n l/n. i don’t think i would've came this far if it wasn’t for you so i’m going to ask you this once,” he paused, intertwining his fingers in yours as he gazes into your eyes deeply, 

“will you be my girlfriend?” 

your relationship with chifuyu wasn’t a perfect one but the two of you always made it work somehow. which is why here you are sitting against your bed frame with luggages packed by the side wondering what exactly had gone wrong along the way? 

and you realised that you were never meant to be chifuyu’s end game. you were never meant to be his forever. 

“you think that i don’t fucking know that you were always looking at her instagram when you think i’m not around?” you screamed, body shaking from the exhaustion that’s taking a toll on you both physically and emotionally. “i don’t see how it’s wrong wanting to see how my friend is doing?” chifuyu snaps. 

you scoffed, crossing your arms as you looked away. “yeah. as if you don’t still say her name in your sleep. as if you don’t fucking mess up our favourite food, as if you didn’t tell takemichi that you wished i was haru!” this was the last straw for you. you were too exhausted to try anymore. haru was irreplaceable and you were just a temporary band aid for chifuyu. 

it was as if you had hit jack pot when your lover went silent. “i’ve loved you for so long chifuyu. but loving you hurts too much. i’m so tired of this.” you finally allowed yourself to break down, letting yourself go loose on the emotions you’ve suppressed for years as chifuyu could only watch in remorse for tearing you apart till this state. 

you finally understood why the apple tree never bloomed any apples.

you were twenty seven when you decided to leave chifuyu matsuno. fifteen years of friendship and seven years of being each other’s significant other. you finally walked away, planting one last final kiss on chifuyu’s lips and shutting the door on your ex-lover’s sleeping figure. 

[searidings]

....🥺 can you please tell us more about that season 5 alternate ending where andrea ends up using the dagger pretty please, just like who does she end up hurting and the others reaction? if only you want to of course !

hooookay this ask got me to open that wip for the first time in a year and actually it's not that far from being complete! but idk how to finish it and i feel like i've done the s5 conflict resolution thing in multiple fics now like how many is too many? i fear i may have hit that limit. BUT since you asked, here is the beginning of it. please note:

1) this thing is angsty and also it's unfinished, so read at your own peril

2) because i wasn't ever expecting to finish/publish it, i've recycled bits of description from it into other fics. so if you see stuff i've repeated elsewhere no you don't <3

-

The last thing Lena sees is a flash like dark shadow pass over Andrea’s eyes, before a kryptonite dagger slides between her ribs.

The sound she emits is less of a scream and more of a surprised squeak as she sinks to the ground.

If you want to get to Supergirl, you’re gonna have to go through me.

It’s not that she hadn’t believed Andrea would do it. Lena was under no illusion of safety when she placed herself between Supergirl and the glowing green rock in Andrea’s hand. She’d come to terms with the possibility of dying for Kara long ago.

What she hadn’t been able to prepare for was the pain. The abstract of sacrifice was all well and good, but. Reality, this searing epicentre, a point of white hot agony turned molten, seeping through her body. No amount of her mother’s decorum training had prepared her for this.

Something is filling her mouth, thick and dark and oozing. She can’t scream. Kara sits, eyes silver, a world away. Kara. Lena has to move. She can’t. Andrea steps over her, and is that the pounding of receding footsteps or the dogged beat of Lena’s heart? Either way, it’s slowing. Every inhale cracks her body down the centre, each exhale buries shards of glass inside the gaping wound.

Her eyes are beginning to mist at the edges but she strains, listens. The sound that cuts through the haze is not the scream she dreads, Kara’s agony as her veins sear emerald. It’s not a scream, but a shout, and then a blur passes over her like light and shadow.

Concrete cracks, or perhaps it’s Lena’s ribs. Sounds are muffled now, the world dulled down like the inside of a snow globe. Underwater, time passes sluggishly to where she lies, drifting, encased in glass. But someone is fighting the current, resisting the pull. Hands grasp her shoulders, burning where they touch. Through the rolling fog comes Kara’s face, blurring out in red and blue and gold and sickly green. Lena wants to push her away, keep her separate from the venomous substance protruding from her chest, keep her untainted. But Kara’s hands are dancing there-away along her cheeks, her jaw, Lena’s own name sounding from her lips over and over, a siren song, calling her home. It’s raining now, wet spots peppering her brow, or maybe the sun is crying.

“Lena, Lena,” Kara is saying. It sounds like her heartbeat and she cannot bear for it to stop.

“Kara,” she manages, a whisper, a prayer.

Her face flashes within Lena’s line of sight for one perfect moment, and is she green-tinged or is it Lena’s failing vision? A shiver passes through the air between them, I’m sorry fluttering like a bloodstained white flag but whether it falls from her own lips or another’s, Lena cannot say. Then a sudden pressure at her ribs, a heavy push and release that feels like salvation and damnation all at once.

Lena hears a scream, two screams, billions. She is left gaping, open and exposed. Invaded by the air and exalted by the sticky-sweet blush of her own blood, her body purging itself. Through the slick of gathering crimson her head rolls to the side, darkness pressing in around her, eyes blazing with the final image of a limp hand on the ground beside her, veins shot through with glowing green.

-

For a long time, there is only darkness. The deepest blackness she has ever known, all-encompassing. Devouring light, thought, feeling. Lena floats, tethered to her own existence only by the pressing weight of the dark, closing in until the end of the world.

Slowly, sensations begin to blur in and out. Cold, a deadening flow, hooking into her very marrow and stripping her from the inside out. She drifts, and then there’s heat, scorching, radiating out from her ribs in scalding waves, and she wishes for numbness.

For a moment, Lena thinks she sees the star-burst of veins behind her eyelids, but then they are gone and all is black again. Sound fragments filter through her peripheral awareness. A great noise, banging and shouting and exploding. She slips back under.

Vibrations reach her, but they must be sounds because Lena no longer has a body with which to feel them. She floats, untethered, sinking beneath the surface of a dark ocean so vast it surely cannot know she’s there. In the deep, voices flicker.

“Haven’t you heard that you’re supposed to leave the knife in? She’s minutes from bleeding out.”

The blackness turns to blood around her, not vibrant red but sticky dark, the kind so loaded with the very force of someone’s life that it moves slowly, crawls under the weight of it, sucking light from all it touches.

“Her veins were green, Alex.”

An eternity passes.

She dreams of her mother, dark hair fanning behind her as she cuts through the still waters of the lake. The scene is calm, but the growing dread means Lena knows what’s coming and suddenly it’s not her mother but Kara before her, and the lake isn’t clear but radioactive, glowing green, and still Lena stands at the shore and watches her slip away, helpless.

Words float through the haze and Lena wishes she could reach out, grasp them, weigh them in her hands to know the truth behind them. Radiation and poisoned and flared and gone, the sounds making physical shapes in the darkness. She thinks of a child, two dark-haired children, of hours spent pouring over a dictionary. A cruel laugh when she got a definition wrong, grudging silence when she got it right. How she wishes now to be wrong, to mishear, a stay of judgment on the world these words conjure into being. But the focus is gone, and she slips away again.

“—whatever you have to do! Or so help me, I’ll—”

Though Lena is nothing now, just an exhale in the wind, she smiles. Warmth blooms, the blackness not crushing but caressing for a moment, and she drifts into memories of happier times.

A million years pass, a billion. Lena is upside down, and right way up, and no way up at all. If she still had a face, she might feel the pressure of a warm forehead against her own. If she still had hair, the imprint of lips pressed gently against it might still ache. If she hadn’t burned every meaningful bridge in her life in the year before her death, she might believe the trick of a whisper wrapping on the breeze, words of comfort, of promise.

But she had, so she doesn’t, and time collapses in on itself as Lena watches, motionless and alone.

-

Though she has always been nowhere, she can feel herself drifting further and further from the last thing that might just resemble a somewhere. The eons slow. If she were a doctor, Lena thinks, then this would be the time to make herself comfortable. To say her goodbyes.

She cannot look at blackness any longer, cannot bear the glowing green after-image that seems to stick to every corner and edge. She thinks of blue, of rain-washed skies and Kara’s eyes, conjures it into being with every fibre she has left. Wraps herself up in it, plunges headfirst, drowns.

“Like it matters!” Kara says, no, shouts, from somewhere far above and below her. Lena would flinch, if only she still had a body. The voice rings out through the void. “Like any of it matters now.”

Lena is privately inclined to agree. She tries to breathe, but the full weight of the universe, of every universe, presses in. As everything, even the blackness, dulls, there emerges a crushing, cracking suffocation, and Lena wonders why she can’t even die in peace. A high-pitched scream, maybe hers, maybe Kara’s, maybe her mother’s, maybe the world’s, stretching out before her like a pathway. Though there’s no doubt where it ends, Lena almost wants to follow it, if only to escape this sensation of being crumbled, submerged, denied life as its very essence is wrung from her being.

And then a hundred trillion bolts of lightning shoot through her at once, and Lena is gone.

-

When she wakes, she wakes secure in the knowledge that she must be alive. Sure that the pain that had burst through her, blighted every nerve with an agony so intense she feels its phantom grip even now, could only lead back to life. Sure that no departure could hurt that much.

When she wakes, it is through cracked, dry eyes to the sight of pipes and ceiling vents, the bland, industrial grey that can only denote underfunded government property.

When she wakes, Kara is standing at the foot of her bed, hands behind her back and looking every inch the righteous hero, and Lena’s unsteady heart sinks. She’s been on the receiving end of this authoritative pose more than enough for one lifetime. At least her hands aren’t on her hips.

But Kara’s eyes brighten as they meet Lena’s fluttering gaze. “Lena.” Quiet, reverential. “How are you feeling?”

Lena takes stock. Alive, to begin with. Every limb still intact. Aside from an unnerving constriction in her chest and the fact that her blood feels a little like it’s burning her cells as it courses through her veins, it could certainly be worse.

When she speaks her voice is hoarse, cracking. “What happened?”

The same darkness creeps into the edges of her vision as she listens to Kara list the extent of the damage. She presses her lips together, willing away the blackness, registering only snippets.

Stab wound. Kryptonite poisoning. Collapsed lung. Cardiac arrest. Resuscitation.

Leviathan, gone. Andrea, captured. Lex, escaped.

The words wash over her like a freezing tide, and Lena wonders if maybe the darkness had been easier after all.

It takes far longer than it should for her to realise that the room has fallen silent. Kara is watching her, concern etched into her features like tears carving through stone.

Lena swallows as best she can. “And you?”

A corner of Kara’s mouth quirks up. “I’m fine. Thanks to you.”

But she doesn’t look fine. She looks exhausted, her face drawn, blue eyes lacking their characteristic shine. Even her hero’s stance can’t mask the fatigue weighing heavy on her shoulders.

But Lena doesn’t have the strength to argue the point. She rolls her head to the side, joints popping and releasing, noticing for the first time the tangle of IV lines threading into her skin. She lifts her other hand to touch them, feels the warning tug of more needles even as Kara steps forward, arms raised as if to stop her.

Her hands reach toward Lena, or at least, the spaces where her hands should be. Huge white dressings swaddle Kara from the wrists down, so bulky they do not resemble hands at all. Lena’s breath catches in her lungs as she takes in the unwieldy bandages, third degree burns and possible nerve damage echoing through her mind and she understands now why Kara had hidden them behind her back.

The inhale she aims for seems to stick in her ribs and she can feel again the crushing, the cracking, the dizzying lack of oxygen as her head spins. Kara is by her side in an instant, radiating warmth and just breathe, Lena, it’s okay, a comforting weight settling against her hip. Lena thanks the thick blanket for blurring the press of rough bandages where there should be warm skin, softening it into something just nondescript enough to be calming.

When her pounding pulse has slowed, the heart monitor downgrading to a less frenetic beat, she sucks in a breath despite her lungs’ protestation, waits for her vision to clear. Kara is still there, and dread opens up in Lena’s chest.

“You— you touched it. The kryptonite. You pulled it out.”

Kara doesn’t move, doesn’t speak. Just nods, her gaze locked on Lena’s own. Lena lies catatonic, paralysed with the knowledge, unable to move even as Alex enters the room. Dimly aware of low words exchanged between the two sisters and then Alex at her bedside, gentler than Lena’s been worthy of seeing her in years. Just rest, Lena, the press of a button on the IV monitor, and she sinks back into oblivion.