#I really hope jello doesn't see this JKLDSFJKLSDF

[mikodrawnnarratives]

There is a kind of arc that i really like the idea of for Lorelai post-her believing fully she's the ✨mc✨ and the good guy. It's her flipping to the exact opposite. Okay, she's the bad guy. And she still can only handle a black and white mindset, trying to wrap her head around her actions and that makes her bad.

She's bad now, she doesn't get why for a while but she's bad. Molly's gone and it's because of her and she's just stuck. She tries and tries in her escapes with her power to get GOOD at being the bad guy. Accepting... failure. It doesn't work since its always what she plans and any consequences she stops before they can become real consequences. That gnaws at her too..

And ofc at this point she doesn't have Molly to shoulder all the responsibilities of the shop onto, has to do much more work and confront the reality she's been ignoring, how she's hurt Molly. That she royally fucked up, badly. This was so much worse than she realized and she's been.. ignoring it. Because it would have hurt too much, it would mean she's deeply in the wrong. None of this is Molly's fault its entirely HERS

And at that point in order to move forward, after accepting and seeing all her faults in the situation, she's the bad guy, she's the villain, she's nothing like she thought she was in the situation

She'd have to grapple with the fact she HAS to forgive herself.

Lorelai HAS to. If she doesn't, if she keeps repeating Molly's words in her head, she's bad she's a villain, she's only going to make herself a self fulfilling prophecy. (Which, to me, def sounds like a lorelai thing for her to do if she went down this road. Like, ✨prophecy✨ is so in line with her fantasy escapism thing i love it.) If she ONLY believes that she is a villain, that she hurts people, she's dooming herself to never get better, to never be better and make up for what she's done. If you believe you can only do harm, you aren't opening yourself up to the idea you can do good. Just like the vice versa

It'd be a FASCINATING thing in my opinion for a character like Lorelai to eventually go through i think about this so often. She has to crawl out of her black and white mentality for things to get better. She can't think she's an entirely good person, the hero of the story, the protagonist, but she can't fall into believing the exact opposite either.

That is why playing out make believe stories where she's one or the other just isn't going to work, it doesn't acknowledge AT ALL the morally gray she's in. It might provide comfort as an escape, but it doesn't help her improve. Cuz Lorelai isn't wholly a bad person. She has DONE BAD, but she's not a BAD person cause no one can be a GOOD person. (this is why i like the idea of her watching bojack horseman 😌)

She has good traits and bad. She has reasons that don't excuse her actions AT ALL but those reasons exist and she NEEDS to address them. She NEEDS to forgive herself for the fire (a fire she can't even say for certain is her fault). She NEEDS to take responsibility for her actions. She NEEDS to stop relying on her powers as a coping mechanism. Her escapism affects not only herself but the people around her, and she NEEDS to realize that. She HAS to.

Whether Molly forgives her isn't in her control, she can only try to be better than she was before. Lorelai has to move forward with her life. If she doesn't then she's only going to continue to be miserable.