#I probably didn't answer this elloquently enough lmao

[marudyne]

Hey, Maru! I love your art so much; there's something so poignant and classic about it? It makes me think of old fashioned French postcards or something very elegant. Thanks for sharing your creations with us! I have some P5 related questions, so I'll just get to the point. SPOILER WARNING! In your understanding and pov, how do you think Akechi was feeling when he pulled the trigger on (cognitive) Akira? I mean, he truly thought that was the real one. (1/3)

First of, thank you very much! I’m glad to hear you think my art is elegant- I try to go for that, well, generally when I’m not being super lazy!

I don’t think I understand Akechi well enough, or as well as I’d like (yet here I am drawing comics and writing fics lmao)As for how Akechi felt- I do think he felt a bit of satisfaction /when/ he pulled the trigger and only on that second. It was, after all, him getting one step closer to the finale of his plan, one step closer to his revenge against Shido that he’s been working on for years AND he rose above Akira who he thinks to have everything he ever wanted in life. But, I don’t think he was necessarily really happy about it.That whole scene in the torture room reeks of Akechi putting on a villain’s mask and playing the role as fine as he could. Though, honestly, I think he was trying to fool himself more than he was trying to fool Akira with that performance- if anything it could be so that he could put himself in a mindset to actually be able to kill him.

So the way I see it, it’s more like that moment when you’re angry and lashing out, that split second of satisfaction before what you did really catches on to you. I mean, afterwards he seemed to be very detached/numb looking as he poked Akira’s corpse + leaves the room and that continues until he calls Shido, i.e. until he slips on another mask.

But yes, Akechi does care for Akira, and tries to lie to himself that he doesn’t at the end. He DOES contact Akira before he finds out he is PT or related to it, so until he got actual proof that Akira was one of them, I don’t think he would really try to deny his feelings- he isn’t 100% sure as to what they are, could be just friendship or some sort of kinship. It’s just a testament to Akechi’s willpower to be able to sacrifice someone he cares for deeply in order to achieve his own personal goals. I don’t know personally if it’s deeper than that- deeper than just a testament for Akechi’s strive and thirst to achieve his goal and how far he is willing to go. I also do think that, well, after all the shit he has had to do to get there, one more person added to the pile wouldn’t matter. He probably thinks he wouldn’t have deserved it any other way.

Plus he does drop some pretty heavy hints, so a part of him wanted to be stopped + helped by the PT, but the other louder part of him wanted to finish things.

As for my personal feelings for that scene-

uhm. I’m a NieR + Drakengard fan……….. boy did I nut when I got to that scene i live tweeted that. I really did like the contradiction you find in Akechi in that scene, and I loved that willingness to chase his own dream to the point of sacrificing something that he probably knows would make him happier just to grant his own ideal and that juxtapose with Akechi’s childishness+love for heroes??? (flashbacks to P2) b o yyyyyyyyYYY Plus all that you can explore about his character with that added layer man… I guess, all in all, I think it just makes his character more interesting and with more meat on his bones.

It had some rather tragic connotations, and added anew layer to their relationship and feelings for each other that I’m a sucker for. I love this sort of complex relationships that are bittersweet.

Moreover, ngl, I DO have a theory about Akechi, his background and his powers that relate as to why he would emotionally be able to do something like this buuuuut people will have to wait for my friend’s fic (Catching Smoke) to reveal it before I actually talk about it myself +post the justification(Dw if you don’t end up reading the fic/don’t feel like it, because once that part is posted, I’ll be posting comics about that theory becauSE LET ME TELL YOU IT’S GOLD)Edit: Anyone, feel free to message me if you’d like me to explain what I mean by something or whatnot either out of anon or not- I automatically reply to all un-anon asks privately so don’t worry. If anything you can shoot a message or whatnot.