#I hope the bold text at the top helps people to understand what's behind the cut

[miggydiaz]

for the salty ask: 3, 7, 10, 11, 15, 16, 19, 22, 23, 24, 25 and 27 for spn

I had to do this one today because I have a LOT of Supernatural feelings and so a lot of these are even longer than my CK one. But thanks for the ask @wonderwolfballoon!

UNPOPULAR SUPERNATURAL OPINIONS AHOY: INCLUDES ANTI-DESTIEL SENTIMENTS AND OTHER UNSAVORY ELEMENTS

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? 100000000% I have unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion in the SPN fandom. SPN was the fandom that taught me to make JUDICIOUS use of the blocking feature tumblr offers in order to curate my experience. I would actually encourage anyone and everyone to use the blocking feature if they disagree with people. Honestly, we don’t owe anyone our time or energy, especially on the internet! It is much healthier than sending or responding to hate, IMO. 7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?* This is actually a hard one for me to answer, so let me start by saying -- I have not seen a SINGLE episode since 9x05? I think? Whichever episode was the Dr. Deanlittle one where he talks to animals. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the first 5 seasons, and they are all I watch anymore and I pretend nothing else exists after that (except The French Mistake because that episode is hilarious). But uh... I guess the simple answer is when I was originally watching it, I really loved Dean. He was brash, snarky, rough around the edges... but kind of soft in a I’m too toxically masculine to deal with my softness sort of way that I love seeing characters grow out of as they mature. But when I go back and rewatch now, much older than I was in 2006 when I first started watching, I see how awful a lot of his older behavior truly was. I still love Dean, and I will be a Dean girl until I die probably, but sometimes you gotta remind yourself that your faves have been problematic in the past so you don’t put them up on fandom constructed pedestals.

10. Most disliked arc? Why? AND AS A BONUS, MY ANSWER to 11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why? I could write a literal essay about all of the problems I have with the later seasons (the ones I watched, which encompasses 6, 7, 8, and a few episodes of 9). But by far and away, the thing I hated most, was the Men of Letters.

Okay, this is where I am going to recognize my love of certain characters is at FUNDAMENTAL ODDS with how that character develops later and what history and background we get later on them. I RECOGNIZE this character is problematic, and I would NEVER STAND for his shit IRL, but fiction is complicated and nuanced, and fantastic circumstances do not make for normal behaviors. That being said, with all warnings I could possibly give, and with the full understanding that what I am about to say is basically fandom blasphemy of the highest order...

I like John Winchester’s character.

I know, I know. If you wanna stop reading and block me now, you are free to do that. I will not hold it against you. I am not about to apologize for anything he has done. I just need to contextualize why I have such an issue with the MOL storyline and it starts with the simple fact that I liked John Winchester as he was originally presented.

To me, and with the full understanding that I am answering this from the perspective of someone who DOES NOT regard anything past season 5 as personal canon, John Winchester is the perfect example of a truly complicated character. Here’s a parent who, if we take the pilot and the original s2 Djinn episodes at face value, could have been a great parent, who then got shoved into a fantastically impossible situation and made terrible choices that he thought were necessary in order to keep himself and his sons safe. That does not EXCUSE the heaps of abuse that he piled onto Dean in any way. We know John and Mary didn’t have a great marriage. But we also know from the pilot that John was at least a caring and present father, mostly,  for the 4 years he got to parent in a normal world, and that if Mary had lived, John would’ve been a softball playing dad who raised his kids and had a loving marriage with his wife. (Again, I need to reiterate, I did not watch anything past the early episodes of s9. If there is later canon that negates this, I do not know about it, nor do I want to because I don’t think of anything past 5 as canon) This is all important to me because these things emphasize that John was “NORMAL”. He was a mechanic, from a family of mechanics, whose father didn’t bail on him (a man in the episode where Dean is transported back in time to Lawrence tells John to ‘say hi to your old man for me’ or something to that effect). He was just a midwestern dude. Giving John Winchester a fantastical background through this Men of Letters bullshit made me SO MAD. First of all, I hate when later canon negates previous canon. I cannon TELL you how much I hate it. And the later seasons of Supernatural are riddled with stuff that doesn’t make any damn sense in the context of original, Kripke written canon, which is exactly why I stopped watching. That’s not ~Evolution of the show.~ That’s conveniently forgetting stuff that made your show and its premise so successful to begin with in order to keep filming episodes so you can keep making money. It’s the sacrifice of art for capitalism and yes I know this is a stupid TV show but as a writer myself it PISSES ME OFF.

/rant

ALSO, the idea that this toxically masculine family was set on this path by Heaven, and inherited this curse that put them on this path from their mother was such a good plot twist in its heyday. We spent four seasons thinking of Mary Winchester as a victim of circumstance, whose fate could not have been avoided because she was the mother to Sam, who is effectively cursed. And then, we learn that its BECAUSE of Mary that this ball even got rolling in the first place. IDK if you were around for that time in the fandom but at least in my circle, this was a big fucking deal. There had been so much (rightful) discourse about John before this, and what kind of parent he was, that Mary became almost deified in the same way Dean deifies her. And then we find out that this whole story gets set in motion by a decision she made because this was the life she found herself in. This was great. It was interesting. And even though the MOL doesn’t negate any of this, it does give John this weirdly fantastical that isn’t necessary. Let this guy be just some Joe Schmoe who fell in love with a kick ass hunter and had no idea any of this even existed. Let Mary and her want to be ‘normal’ be a complicated moral choice that fundamentally altered the paths of her husband and sons. It’s good tv!

Also, I fucking hate the bunker. The best episodes are Dean and Sam having moments in the car, or while in motel rooms on their cases, or whatever. I don’t mind them having a home base. I’m fine with that. But if a building could ever be a Mary Sue character, the bunker is it. I hate all of the MOL storyline, starting with this place.

I may not even tag this as Supernatural, I don’t need angry later season stans in my inbox.

15. Unpopular opinion about the manga/show?

There’s nothing good about anything that happened after season 6. It’s all a bunch of retconning bullshit. Season 6 had its moments where it was interesting, so I cut it a little bit of slack, but as far as I’m concerned, the show ended in season 5. I’m not sure that’s necessarily unpopular, but it does feel that way on tumblr, so. 

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

Aside from ending it in season 5?

Oooh, I’m about to blaspheme again. I am definitely not tagging this as Supernatural.

I would never have introduced Castiel, and I would’ve given that entire storyline to Anna. Or, alternatively, I would’ve flipped their story lines.

Look, for whatever it’s worth... I agree with the idea that Dean Winchester is a repressed bisexual. His Dr. Sexy love, the entire storyline with Benny in season 8, etc. I just don’t think he feels romantically about Castiel. And like, that’s okay! Just because you’re not into someone who is into you doesn’t mean you owe them a relationship or anything, no matter what the fandom thinks.

But I also think Dean has a big problem when it comes to women. Again, obviously later on in the series, Dean shifts and Charlie happens and Claire Novak and I know all of these things from gifs okay, context is not applicable here because I have none. But early on, Dean struggles A LOT with thinking of women as A) capable and B) trustworthy. He exists in a perpetual state of identifying women along the Madonna/Whore binary. Even Jo, however you feel about her, and to be clear, I loved Jo, but he doesn’t stop thinking of her really as a kid until they’re about to shoot the devil. Up until then, he’s genuinely surprised Ellen lets her out of the damn house.

Giving him a strong, capable woman who rebels against Heaven for HIM would have fundamentally altered Dean’s perceptions of women much earlier on than we get and would have forced him to examine some of that misogyny head on.

Dean has no problems trusting men. This is why the entire Gordon fiasco happens, right? It was less work for him to trust Castiel because Castiel is the inverse of Ruby. Angel to her Demon. Angels and demons don’t really have genders, but for the sake of presentation of vessels, man to her woman. Not even getting me started on the problematic parts of having significant demons mostly symbolized by women (Meg, Ruby, Lilith) and having significant angels mostly represented by Men (Castiel, Michael, Lucifer, Zachariah, Gabriel, Raphael), and how that ties into the idea of Original Sin and yada yada, but just like it’s interesting to have Mary and her decisions be the catalyst for the story, it’s interesting to have this badass warrior angel in Anna who marches down to Hell to yank Dean out, and through her interactions with him, decide to rebel against the ultimate patriarchy, while Dean gets an equally strong female counterpart to Sam’s Ruby, a woman for all intents and purposes that he respects as a soldier and an ally and not just a potential piece of ass.

Also, Castiel fans being literally unbearable is why I left the fandom. Nothing against Misha or anything, and not even anything against Cas as a character (who I very much enjoyed in seasons 4 and 5), but his fans have always been the worst and they try to insert him into everything.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

Castiel/Destiel fans, which even though I also hated the direction the show was going, drove me out of the fandom. Not like, personally or directly, but just the sheer mental hoops they had to jump through in order to make their ship work and I just got tired of seeing all of the contrived meta on my dash. Oh, and the rampant misogyny that came out of those early Castiel fans. I didn’t appreciate it from the Wincest corner, and I definitely didn’t appreciate it from the fans of the new guy. Gross.

22. Popular character you hate?

Oof. I don’t know. I don’t really hate Castiel, because again, I liked him a lot in seasons 4 and 5. Even 6 was interesting, even if I don’t regard it as my own personal show canon. I don’t think there was a popular character in those first five seasons I ever really hated. I didn’t fundamentally hate a character at all until the MOL stuff came around. Um. Yeah, I don’t really have an answer for this.

23. Unpopular character you love?

Pretty much every female character ever. Jo, Ellen, Ruby, Meg... although Meg became more popular as the series went on, Anna. Um. OH, BELA. Bela ESPECIALLY, I recently rewatched season 3 and I cannot emphasize how MUCH I love Bela. She was the best purely human foil ever. Bela is hands down the character I love most that the fandom had frothing at the mouth hatred for. It doesn’t help that I legitimately think Lauren Cohan is one of the most beautiful women on the planet. But seriously, Bela. Hands down.

24. Would you recommend XXX to a friend? Why or why not? 

I have! Many of times, and ALWAYS WITH THE CAVEAT to stop at the end of season 5. Not a single one of them has listened to me and almost all of them came to me at the end of the finale and were like WHY DID I WASTE SO MUCH TIME, and I don’t want to say I told them so, but like, I explicitly in neon colored text once told them so, so like, idk what to tell them. But yes! I think if someone is interested in some classic mystery television that has an overarching theme of family and forgiveness and striking out against the boxes that life tries to put us all into, SPN is a great show. But only the first 5 seasons. Also, be prepared for some thematically problematic parts of the show because there’s a lot of cishet toxic masculinity in those early seasons, and we should examine our media critically. There’s also a lot of good though too, and IMO, the good outweighs the bad.

25. How would you end XXX/Would you change the ending of XXX?

I would’ve ended it at season 5. I would’ve had Sam escape the pit and seen him standing under the street lamp, but then I would’ve had him walking away to leave Dean with Lisa (btw, side note, I DIDN’T like Lisa because I don’t think Dean would ever be truly happy with someone completely outside the life). Not because Sam doesn’t love his brother, but because he *does* love his brother, and because he would want Dean to be happy, even though Dean and Sam’s ideas of what makes the other happy have always been a little bit screwed up.. but that’s a different story.

27. Least shippable character?

Probably Zachariah. God, could you imagine? And... maybe Alastair, but I’m sure there are fics out there that I do not want to think about.

[softyoongiionly]

chapstick

based on the time Jungkook said he needed someone to scold him so he’d remember to put lip balm on.

Or 

Jungkook’s had a really long day and the only that can make it better, is seeing you. 

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Word Count: 5.8k

Genre: fluff, smut, established relationship, jungkook has a man bun idk what else I could possibly want

Warnings: language, explicit smut (18+ only plz), oral (male receiving)

A/N: Hello yes, I am mess. I wrote this in like four hours and it’s unedited but wow wow wow wow I am GOING THROUGH it for Jungkook. Anywayz, I love u. here u go

Jungkook is in a bad mood today.

He’s been awake since 6am, he hasn’t eaten since mid-morning and, he’s been practicing for over 12 hours.

Worst of all, everyone else seems to be in a good mood.  

It’s not that he hates when his hyung's are happy, it’s just that when you’re in a bad mood-  sometimes the shriek of someone’s laughter can feel intrusive.  

“Alright!” Hoseok’s voice hits the practice mirrors and with Jungkook feeling oversensitive, he cringes at the sound of it, “Let’s go again from the top!”

Jungkook sighs through his nose, stretching his sore back for a moment before getting back into formation.

“Jungkook-ah! Push a little harder in the second half ok?!”  

Hoseok is in dance-mode and therefore he has no idea how loud he’s being.

Jungkook purses his lips and nods, taking a deep breath before shaking out his hands.

“Yah! Jungkook?” Hoseok calls, facing the mirror, his eyes searching for Jungkook at the back of the practice room.

“Yeh.” He grunts, barely looking up from the floor.

“Did you hear me?”

He nods, his hands fumbling around in the pockets of his sweatpants, “Push harder in the second half...”

The rest of the boys seem unphased by his uninterested demeanor. They are no stranger to exhaustion.  

“Alright- let’s go.”

For what feels like the 100th time today, Jungkook moves through the routine as if it were second nature. The movements feel robotic and the muscles in his arms are beginning to turn to Jell-O. The strands of his hair are covered with sweat and, he’s thankful for his newly procured undercut for lessening the amount of heat he’d normally feel after working out this long.  

He feels gross though.  

Normally, he enjoys working this hard but today he isn’t feeling it. In fact, the strain between his brows is getting a little painful as he really tries his best not to frown.

The new choreography is intense and as much he likes the challenge- after the 100th time of running through it, he’s starting to get frustrated.

Panting through his nose, he holds his position at the end of the routine before Hoseok finally calls it.

“Yahhhh! That was a lot better huh? You guys did good.” He praises, clapping his hands, “Now go get some water and then we’ll run it again...”

Jungkook sighs hopelessly, letting his head fall back on his shoulders. He cringes at the feeling of sweat collecting on his skin, wanting nothing more than to make it back home to his shower.

Amongst other things...

Grabbing a bottle of water off of the table, Jungkook has to work very hard not to crush the bottle in his hands as he eagerly gulps down what he can. He finishes the bottle in record time and as he reaches for a second one, he pulls his phone out of his pocket to check it.  

Tweety: hiii I hope you’re having a good day! Do you want to takeout tonight? I got caught up at the school and, I didn’t pull anything out.

Jungkook feels his tight chest loosen up a bit as he sees your text come through.

You made a comment one day that he ‘gives off bugs bunny vibes’ and he responded by comparing you to Tweety bird.  

Needless to say, the nicknames are dumb but you guys think they’re cute.  

Bugs: takeout sounds good. I’ll be there late tonight though :/ I hope you had a good day too. Miss u.

Jungkook has just enough time to respond to you before he is wincing at the sound of Hoseok corralling everyone back to the practice floor.

Again, again, again, again, and again...

He’s so tired by the end of the circuit that he’s starting to feel throbbing in his temples. Headaches are a common side effect of over-exertion and just as he is getting ready to beg to go home, they are calling it.

“Ok ok- good job! You’ve worked hard everyone. Let’s rest for a day and then resume on Sunday.”

Jungkook feels his entire body deflate with relief at the last words parading out of Hoseok’s mouth.  

His day is finally over.

He reminds himself to never wear new boots to rehearsal again because he can’t feel the tips of his toes and his fairly certain there are blisters on the of his ankles.  

“Are you riding with me?” Jimin asks him on the way out of the practice room, his voice decorated with exhaustion.

Jungkook doesn’t fully pay attention to his question, his eyes already trained on his phone.

“No, I’m getting my own car.”

Jimin looks confused for a moment before a small smirk comes over his face.

“Are going to see her?”

Jungkook doesn’t respond quick enough, his mouth parted slightly as he types out his message to you.

“Aren’t you worried what people are going to think? You’re over there a lot...”

Jimin isn’t being judgmental with his questioning and Jungkook knows this. He can hear the genuine concern in his voice and understands that his hyung is merely looking out for him.

“I don’t really care what people think anymore.” He answers honestly, ensuring that he keeps his tone as polite as possible.  

Jungkook’s had to worry about the opinions of others since he was 15. As grateful as he is for his career, he is growing tired of being unable to make his own decisions. His gaze hones in on the tattoos covering his fingers and forearms and remembers a time not too long ago where he was required to hide them. Putting a band aids on his own self-expression didn’t feel good and he sort of promised himself that he wouldn’t allow the expectations of others to stop him from doing what he wanted.  

Or seeing who he wanted...

“You’re getting bolder with age.” Jimin notes, somewhat proudly as his eyes flicker over to him, “You really like her, don’t you?”

Tweety: miss u toooooo. I ordered ramen

Bugs: I just got out. I should be there in 20 minutes. I’m so hungry

Jungkook feels his cheeks heat up at Jimin’s question and rather than answer him, he just kind of shrugs, his mouth turned up in a small smirk.  

“Yah, don’t hold out on me-”Jimin bumps his shoulder, tilting his head in an attempt to get him to look his way, “We’ve known each other for how long?”

Jungkook slips his phone back into his pocket and adjusts his bag on his shoulder.

“I think the answer is obvious hyung.”

Jimin rolls his eyes playfully, “If it’s so obvious then why don’t you just say it.”

The two of them lean against the wall of the lobby, waiting on a notification from their drivers that they are outside.

Jungkook bites his lip, in an attempt to reign in the grin that threatens his face.

“I like her.”

Laughter trickles out of Jimin’s lips as he bumps his shoulder, “Why are you shy all of the sudden? Is there something else I don’t know?”

Yes.

There was something else Jimin didn’t know.  

Jungkook hasn’t told a single soul since it happened.  

He’s so incredibly private and after meeting you, he only has more of an urge to keep things to himself.  

“There’s nothing.” Jungkook mutters, his eyes eagerly looking checking his phone for the driver notification.

“You’re lying to me.” Jimin calls him out, “What is it?”

Jungkook shakes his head, tucking a bit of hair behind his ear. He licks over his lips and immediately regrets the fact that he forgot his Chapstick.

How’s he supposed to kiss you, if his lips are chapped?

“Jungkook-ah, tell me-” Jimin whines, tugging on his sleeve.

He merely snickers finally and shrugs him off, shaking his head, “There’s nothing to tell. Why do you think I’m hiding something from you?”

“Because I’ve known you for almost ten years and I-” Jimin begins before a knowing smirk comes over his face, “Wait- you’ve slept with her haven’t you?”

Jungkook’s eyes widen a bit, taken aback by his bold statement, “Someone’s going to hear you, why are you asking questions like this?”

His hyung giggles, deeply satisfied with his discovery, “You have, haven't you?”

Jungkook feels the threat of a smile come over his face again, “Why do you want to know? It doesn’t matter.”

“It matters-” He shoots him a pointed look, “Because we’re best friends? And I want to know. When did it happen?”

Jungkook is feeling a little bit bolder, unable to help the pride he feels that he was finally able to experience an intimate relationship, “Which time?”

Jimin’s eyes widen before he slaps Jungkook on the arm, “Which time??? You’ve done it more than once?”

“Shhh-” Jungkook whisper yells, his brow furrowing, “We’ve been seeing eachother for 6 months. Why do you look so surprised?”

Jimin chuckles this time, glancing behind him, “I just- I don’t know...it was your first time, wasn’t it? I just thought you’d make a bigger deal of it.”

He shrugs again, a smirk still lingering, “It was a big deal- to us. I thought you guys would just figure it out eventually.”

Ever the nosy one, Jimin slinks a little closer to him, a bit of mischief in his eyes, “It’s fun huh?”

Jungkook just rolls his eyes, brushing him off playfully, “I thought I was supposed to be the youngest.”

Jimin ignores his comment and just looks at him expectantly.

Giving up on holding out, Jungkook finally gives him what he wants and replies.

“It was fun.”

Jimin offers his signature bit of laughter again but before he’s able to interrogate him any further, Jungkook finally gets the notification that his driver is here.

“I’ll see you Sunday, hyung.” Jungkook gives him a short wave before adjusting his bag on his shoulder.

Jimin smirks and flutters his fingers in his direction, “Have fun.”

Jungkook just shakes his head, groaning to himself as he finally leaves the building.

Slumping into his seat, he shuts his eyes for a moment and tries his best not to fall asleep. Thankfully, his desire to eat his weight in ramen paired with his desire to see you keeps him from passing out.  

You and Jungkook have been together for a while now and although the initial nerves surrounding seeing him have lessened slightly, you still want to look good for him. Thankfully for you, when it comes to impressing your boyfriend- less is more.  

Slowly but surely, he has revealed his preferences to you but they have slipped out casually. He doesn’t ever want you to feel like you have to look a certain way for him.  

But you do know he likes black.

And you do know he likes when you wear oversized pieces.

The harsh bit of winter also makes dressing in gigantic hoodies and thick socks a lot easier anyhow.  

So you opt for something along the lines of cute but comfy and tend to your hair the easiest way you know how.  

Jungkook also loves it when you don’t wear any makeup. But he’s never told you directly, you’ve just figured out based on the way he gets all starry eyed every time you wash your face at night.  

The ramen is all set up in the living room and you’ve got one of the Christmas movies the two of you started the other day, ready to play.  

By the time you hear a knock at your door, everything is ready for a cozy Friday night with your boyfriend.

Upon opening your door, you are met with the sight of Jungkook- sweaty, soft and slightly sleepy standing there in all of his glory. He’s dressed in grey sweats and a big white t-shirt, his hair tied up messily atop his head. Along with the smell of sweat, you can faintly make out the remnants of his cologne and it stirs something deep inside of you.  

Jungkook’s eyes scan over you briefly, offering a small smile as he leans in to peck your cheek, “Hiiii...”

He sings the greeting, patting your hips as he quickly steps into your apartment.  

“Hello,” You sing back, giggling a bit, “Did you guys just now finish up practicing? Didn’t you start at like 7?”

Jungkook winces as he begins slipping off his big clunky boots, leaning back against your front door, “Yeah. I really thought they were trying to kill me- I did the new dance so many times, I lost count.”

Pouting your lips, you take his bag off his shoulder and hang it up on your coat rack.  

“I’m so sorry.” You murmur, shaking your head, “Did they give you tomorrow off at least?”

At this, Jungkook grins, nodding as he does, “Yeah, I was going to ask you what you were doing tomorrow cause I thought maybe you’d want to hang out. Our night was supposed to start a lot earlier...”

He looks regretful and even slightly annoyed.

He’s been having this issue a lot lately where his prior obligations and engagements seem to mean nothing to his directors, which never used to be a big deal but, now that he has you in his life- he never wants to let you down.

“I’m free all day-” You reply happily, before narrowing your eyes at him, “I have one condition though-”

Jungkook looks intrigued, cocking his head as he steps forward, “What’s your condition?”

“I need one of these...” Pointing to your lips, you pucker them and make grabby hands at your boyfriend.

He laughs softly, shaking his head as he closes the space between you, “I just got here and you’re already using kisses as collateral now huh?” His voice gets a little lower and before you can reply, his gently places his lips on yours, sighing out through his nose as his flutter shut.

Once he starts kissing you, you aren’t really able to think of a coherent response. Leaning into him, you hum lightly in your throat, tucking your lips between his.  

However, when you attempt to slide your hand up the exposed skin of his arm, he winces and pulls away.

Groaning, you can’t help but giggle, “I know- I know... ‘babe, I’m too sweaty. Let me just shower really quick and then I’ll promise, I'll kiss you so much better’...”

At your attempt to imitate his voice, Jungkook starts laughing- cute nose scrunched up with delight.

He kisses his teeth, “You know me too well. I’ll be right back.”

Jungkook leans in again and kisses you on the cheek before disappearing into your bathroom moments later

After his showering, he comes out in a baggy t-shirt and some sweats, his hair freshly blow dried and piled up on his head in a messy bun.  

He scarfs down his dinner in record time before the two of you settle back against the couch.  

You can feel him looking at you as you giggle at the TV but he doesn’t let his eyes linger very long. He just kind of stares for a moment before simply tightening his grip around your shoulders. He feels so warm beside you that you seriously wonder how long you’ll be able to stay awake with him being the human equivalent of a weighted blanket.  

When your laughter erupts again, Jungkook leans in to pop a kiss on your check, which broadens your smile that much more. It’s only for a moment before he turns back to the TV, seemingly satisfied with his actions. However, you decide to return the favor and smoosh your lips against his face, eliciting a snicker from his throat.  

You snuggle into him more, grabbing his arm that’s resting on the couch beside you and wrapping it around so that his hand is resting your lap. Leaning your head against his chest, you slowly began tracing over the markings on his skin lightly brushing your nails against each unique line. Jungkook’s eyes are trained on the TV and despite his blank expression, you can see the goosebumps forming on his skin.  

Regardless, you just keep going, allowing your fingertips to trace over the letters adorning his hand. Using your nails, you trace between each of his fingers, before interlocking them your own. Once you’re holding hands, Jungkook squeezes slightly, brushing his thumb along your skin which then prompts you to finally to turn to the side and look at him.  

He grins softly, still not glancing your way but choosing to offer a playful comment instead, “You’re not watching the movie...”

You laugh softly, reaching out with your free hand and tilting his face towards you.

“We’ve watched this movie four times-” You retort, “Besides I’m pretty sure I remember you promising me that you’d kiss me properly once you were out of the shower.”

Jungkook’s grin broadens, his doe-eyes alight with defiance, “I’m pretty sure you promised yourself that for me- I don’t remember agreeing to it.”

You scoff in mock offense, “Damn ok. So it’s like that huh? I buy you ramen and yet this is how I’m treated. I’m calling the UN...”

Jungkook laughs a little harder now, the sound a little sharp but intensely endearing, “It’s that serious for you?”

Pouting, you nod, “It is that serious.” You’re about to say something else before you brush your thumb over his lips and notice the dryness there, “Did you remember to bring your chapstick today?”

He immediately sucks his lips between his teeth and given that his ability to speak is no compromsied he simply nods, his eyes wide with false innocence.

“Mhmmm.” He lies

“No you didn’t!” You exclaim, laughing a bit as you press your thumb against the thin line of his mouth, “Babe, it’s so cold outside- your lips are going to start cracking.”

Unfurling his lips, he lets his head fall back on his shoulders, “I know, I know-” He whines playfully before his head snaps back up to yours, the same glint remaining in his gaze, “You have some right?”

You roll your eyes, “You know that I do.”

He snickers, quickly leaning in to kiss your cheek, “Can I have some then?”

Playfully shoving him off, you rise from the couch and shake your head, “I’m giving you one to keep in your rehearsal bag,” You shuffle over to your bathroom, “You better use it!”

He laughs as he hears your demand echo down the hallway before calling back, “Hurry jagi! They are so dry- I can feel them! They are so close to cracking!”

Seconds later, your hurling one of your many lip balms into his lap which he catches just before it hits him.

“Put it on...” You demand pointedly and he shakes his head.

“I don’t think I can-” He sighs dramatically, holding the lip balm out to you, “You have to do it- all of the moisture in my body is slowly fading away...my lips are trying to suck it all up.”

Giggling, you cross your arms, shaking your head, “That makes absolutely no sense.”

“Y/N! Please!” Jungkook chokes out, “Before I waste away...the winter-” His eyes bug out of his head, as his hand clutches his chest, “the winter jagi- it's going to dry me out completely.”

Finally snapping, you grab the Chapstick out of his hands before asserting yourself into his lap. He laughs, resting his head against the couch cushions whilst his hands sneakily find their way to your hips.

“You’re so annoying...” You grumble, still giggling yourself as he puckers his lips dramatically.

“I’m only following your recommendations.” He insists, making kissy noises at you, “Balm me up baby.”

Uncapping the chapstick, you press your chest against his before starting to drag it over his lips. As you get to work on helping him, his mischievous gaze slowly softens until he’s looking up at you with stars in his eyes. Carefully, you make sure every inch of his mouth is covered with balm, paying special attention to the corners and his lower lip. As you finish up, you put the cap back on set on the couch cushion.

He rubs his lips together, humming in satisfaction.

You smirk, “Better?”

Jungkook nods his Adams’ apple bobbing in his throat as he feels you shift on his hips.  

“Make sure.” He murmurs, puckering his lips, his eyes starting to swim with arousal.

You lean in, unable to refuse him before capturing his mouth in a kiss. Rotating your head, you slowly deepen the connection between your lips, drawing a sigh from the boy beneath you. You can feel his thumbs rub ever so gently against the back of your hips as he leans fully back so that your chest is resting on his.

He nudges your nose, allowing his tongue to brush against the bottom of your top lip, requesting entrance into your mouth. You accept him, licking along his tongue, a shiver running up your spine as he sucks slightly on the top of you.  

Jungkook really is a filthy kisser but you’d never guess by just looking at him.  

He’s quite sure his face is growing numb, his only focus on the way you’re making him feel and a somewhat annoying pain on the back of his head. His ponytail is digging against the wall, causing unnecessary discomfort to wash over him. Still kissing you, he reaches behind his head to pull the hair tie out, allowing his hair to fall freely around his face. You take the opportunity to slide your fingers between the strands, scratching gently at his scalp and causing a slightly shaky breath to leave his lips.  

He loves when you play with his hair.  

You use both hands now to tuck it behind his ear before using them to slide down the length of his arms. Finding his hands on your hips, you lace your fingers with his and bring them back up so they are pinned against either side of his head.  

The making out didn’t get him fully hard but as soon as he feels his hands pinned against the head of the couch, he feels his dick twitch almost painfully in his sweatpants.  

Smirking into his mouth, you delight in the sudden halt to his breathing. Subtly, he pushes his hips up a bit when you start kissing your way down his chin and throat. Jungkook summons all the resolve he has and goes perfectly still when you start placing soft kisses along the expanse of his throat. You feel the ache between your legs worsen when you feel his fingers tightening against yours. Jungkook is a very sensitive person, both emotionally and physically. Over the time you’ve become intimate, you’ve slowly uncovered all the little spots that drive him crazy.  

And you’re determined to kiss every single one.  

“You had a hard day huh?” You murmur sweetly, kissing up the right side of his neck.

All he does is nod, his eyes falling shut as he feels your lips getting closer to his earlobe.  

Placing another kiss at his hairline, you slowly kiss along the bottom half of his ear before capturing it between your teeth.

His breath immediately leaves his lips in a shaky mess, his eyes squeezing together as the grip on your hands tightens.

“I think I should help you relax after you’ve worked so hard don’t you?”

He has no idea what you plan to do to him but, he honestly couldn’t give a fuck.  

He’s too hard, too wound up and too into to you to ask any meaningful questions.  

Jungkook merely nods, not trusting his vocal abilities at the moment as he waits for your next move.  

A smirk comes across your face as you suckle lightly on his earlobe, knowing how much he likes it before using your lips to descend back down his neck.  

You lean away from him to get a closer look at his expression. Smoothed out in pure pleasure but also tightening slightly at the discomfort brought on by his throbbing dick.  

His eyes are still closed as you release your grip on his hands and he keeps them that way even as you move to grip the hem of his t-shirt.  

“Are you falling asleep on me?” You tease and he merely grins, shaking his head.

“Then why are your eyes closed?”

He doesn’t open them and instead allows a breathless bit of laughter to leave his lips, sound almost exasperated.

“I feel dizzy.”

His simple responses elicits another desire within you that intensifies your goal to make him feel good.  

“In a good way?” You check, playfully pinching his stomach as you slowly pull up his t-shirt.

He goes back to nodding, his hands coming down to assist you with your task. His hair flops haphazardly as the material of his shirt messes with it. You take a moment to admire how incredibly beautiful he is when he settles back against the couch, your mouth going dry at the sight of him. Flushed face, pouted lips, defined muscles and hardened nipples lay before you, and you are a little unsure of where to put your lips first.

Although it doesn’t really matter, your destination is the same regardless.  

Deciding on another spot that drives him crazy, you allow your fingers to brush along his ribs before leaning in to kiss over his defined chest. Jungkook’s hands are laying limp against the couch but when he feels your lips nearing his nipple, he turns them so they are able to grip the edge of the couch. Sucking his nipple into your mouth, you let you tongue rub against the peak of it. Jungkook sighs loudly from above you and you can’t help but smirk as he still doesn’t allow himself to moan.  

It’s a quirk you’ve noticed and you feel like it’s likely left over from the long-discarded idea that Jungkook has regarding his masculinity. No matter how often you tell him that making noise is perfectly ok (and really hot) he still waits till he can’t help himself.  

And to be honest, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy pushing him towards that point.  

After you finish kissing his chest, you begin trailing your wet lips down the middle of torso, taking a moment to suck over the soft skin of his not so softly defined stomach.

“All those hours in the gym are really paying off-” You mumble against his skin, brushing your fingers over his abs, “You look so strong...”

At your compliment, his lips part, one side of his mouth turning up in a slight smile.

“I wanna look good for you.”

It’s quite a ridiculous statement really.  

Jungkook would look good no matter how many visible abs he had but you know he likes the praise none the less.  

So you shower him with it.

“You always look good for me.” You assure him, kissing along the band of his sweatpants now, “I’m proud of you for working so hard.”

He grins a little more, leaving his eyes mostly close but allowing them to peak open a bit to watch you sink to your knees.  

“Thank you.”

He swallows back the threat of hyperventilation as he feels you spread his legs, his eyes closing completely once again.  

If you weren’t able to make out the sound of his breath picking up, the movement of us chest certainly would have given it away, his pecks heaving a bit as he tries to relax.  

But as you begin gently massaging up his legs, Jungkook realizes relaxing might not be possible.  

At least not at the moment...

He’s stained the seam of his sweatpants with precum which would upset him if it were any other substance but with his dick being so hard, he really can’t find himself to care about anything else.

Tucking your fingers beneath his sweatpants, you begin tugging them off of his hips, relieved that he isn’t wearing any underwear.

Jungkook takes another deep and shaky breath through his nose, tilting his head back again as he tries to center his thinking.

But you’re kind of driving him insane.  

Starting at his knee, you kiss all the way up his inner thigh, taking in the scent of his body- indescribable and mouthwatering, just like him. You stop just before his dick before repeating your actions along the other leg.  

Jungkook’s stomach is caving in at the teasing but he does absolutely nothing to urge you further.  

He likes the torture.  

“Is there anything you want me to do while I'm down here?”  

Jungkook bites his bottom lip at your question, knowing that you’re going to make him ask for it but feeling shy regardless.

“Yes.” He breathes  

You brush your fingertips over his balls, his hips only slightly twitching at the sensation.

He’s trying to stay calm, not wanting to get so ahead of himself he blows his load before you’ve even started.  

“What is it that you want me to do?” You murmur, leaning in to breathe against his length.

You’re expecting him to stall and use every other word to ask for what he wants but instead, he surprises you.

“Suck on it...” He whispers, taking a deep breath before exhaling on the word, “...please.”

Smirking to yourself, you wrap a hand around him- feeling him throb within your grip before kitten licking over the tip of him. After ridding his dick of all the precum, you decide to end his descent into madness and suck him into your mouth.  

You start slow, licking up and down the length of him, your core aching at the taste. Jungkook’s nails are digging into the couch cushions as he feels your movements, his teeth starting to chew on the inside of his bottom lip.

Bringing your hand into the mix, you guide a flexible grip up and down up, using your lips to suck on the tip of him, your tongue tracing the curves of his frenulum.  

Jungkook’s lips part in awe as he feels the combination of moves on his dick, his toes curling against the shag carpet. He knows that his vision will be swimming but he wants to watch you so badly, he decides to finally open his eyes.  

As he predicted, his vision is spotty and the dizziness he felt earlier is nothing compared to the way he feels now.  

It all becomes irrelevant though when he locks eyes with you. Your boyfriends normally innocent gaze is completely glossed over with lust, his mouth hanging open as he stares down at you, the same smirk slowly returning to his lips.  

Sucking off of him, you use your hand to jerk him off as you address him, “Does it feel good?”

He bites his lip, his face and chest decorated with the flush of arousal as he nods.

“Why are you so quiet then?”  

For whatever reason, your question tickles him and drunken giggle bubbles up past his lips,

“’ss too good.” He explains, shaking his head at you, “I don’t know how to say anything...”

Logically, he understands that you aren’t talking about him necessarily saying anything but more so referring to the lack of noise he’s making. However, he knows very well that he’s going to be moaning for you soon, especially when your mouth returns to his dick a second time.  

When he feels you palm his balls, his eyes fall shut again, his hips twitching all over the place when you resume both sucking and jerking him off.  

Jungkook knows he’s biting his lip really hard when he starts to taste a bit of blood but he doesn’t care, the pleasure he’s experiencing overpowering any semblance of pain.  

“Y/N” He whispers, “I’m getting really close.”

His warning makes you swoon because he sounds so desperate and yet he’s being considerate, not wanting to intrude your mouth with the taste of him.  

Despite the fact that, that’s all you want.  

You merely moan against his length, signaling for him to let go whenever he wants, your speed increasing all the while.  

“Fuck...” He whispers again but the word sounds like it got caught in his throat, “Fuck...fuck...fuck.”

Hearing him swear makes the wet disaster in your shorts much worse but you wanna make him cum so badly, you ignore it completely. The sound of him nearing the edge is enough to take him all the way in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks as you suck him harder.

Finally, he breaks- a whimpering skipping past his lips, one of his hands coming up to cover his mouth. As much as you want him to moan for you, you don’t want to stop your motions long enough to tell him.  

He throws his head back against the headrest, his eyes opening wide as he stares up at the ceiling in amazement. His body jerks as the first wave of his release hits your tongue and rope after rope, you swallow everything he gives you, sucking him through his orgasm and until the sensitivity becomes too much and he starts squirming beneath you.  

You suck off of him, allowing his softening length to rest against his lower stomach, which is now trembling with his heavy breath.

Jungkook pants, still staring him at the ceiling and while he’s coming down, you kiss along his hips, letting him take his time. Whilst you’re kissing up his happy trail, one of his hands reaches out to brush over your face. Its then you notice that it’s clammy and a bit shaky so, you take a moment to press a kiss over his knuckles, trying to encourage him to look at you.

“You’re shaking.” You whisper and before you know it, you can hear that same drunken giggle coming from his lips again.

Your boyfriend looks down at you, a deep sense of amazement in his eyes as he laughs still, a bit delirious.

“Yeah well-” He shakes his head, still trying to get his wits about him, “You should have a talk with your mouth about that...”

You giggle now, resting your chin on your hand as you admire how fucked-out he looks. His hair is a mess and he is covered in a light layer of sweat and if you’re being honest, you really want to jump his bones all over again. But you know he needs a minute.

“I just wanted to help you relax.” You claim innocently to which he just shakes his head, gesturing for you to get on the couch.

“Come here.”

You scramble up towards him, sitting beside his exhausted body and before you know it, he’s pulling in for a kiss, his smile creeping back when he feels your lips.

“You’re amazing.”

He sounds silly but sincere all at once, kissing softly at your lips before nudging your nose.

You smile back into the kiss, mumbling something of the same nature to him.  

The two of you kiss one another for a moment until Jungkook is pulling back, allowing his dark gaze to scan over your face, eyes suddenly full of determination.

“I think it’s time you relax too now, don’t you think?”

[namjoonswifey99]

Stop Playing Pt.3

Erik Killmonger X Reader 

Warnings : Cussing it get steamy Profanity Use of The N-word Possivness 

Author Notes: I Know I'm way behind in this story but I'm sorry I'm catching up now. I don't own anything but the plot and the last name.

Y/N was heated how dare he use her feelings against her who he does think he is. Y/N was now pacing in her towel throwing insults at Erik even though he wasn't present. Y/N decided she was gonna be bold and petty by wearing an outfit that she knows he hates. Y/N wore a brown chocolate two piece set that showed her slim figure and her gorgeous chocolate skin.The outfit was showing the top part of her breast a nice deep v cut and her skirt had a slit starting from mid thigh. Y/N then proceeded to put her smedium poetic braids in a half up half down look. Y/N looked in the mirror and she honestly couldn't believe how good she looked. Y/N other friend Monique was texting her to let her know she was outside. Y/N and Monique were more like sisters than friends.

“ Okkkkkkkkayyyyy Y/N i see you stepping on some necks tonight” Monique said hyping Y/N up. Monique was waiting on Y/N to come out of her shell and this was her perfect time to do it. “Well Erik been pushing me not to go to the party even using my feelings towards him so i said fuck it watch me go.” Y/N said making sure she got everything in her purse that included her taser, pepper spray, keys, and her pocket knife. 

“ Girl you are lying to me right now he did not” Monique says while looking at her in disbelief. Good thing they were at a red light because Monique couldn't believe what she was saying. “ That's crazy he needs his ass beat” Monique said while driving off from the red light. “ Girl like somebody is gonna be bold and touch Erik but I did call him a bitch”. Y/N said while pulling up her and Erik messages to show Monique. “ Y/NNNNN you didn't please tell- girl you're gonna get fucked up”. Monique said while pulling up to Aaron’s party. Monique then grabbed Y/N phone to see their messages and there it was clear as day the bitch word that dudes hate to call.

“ Y/N you better not let Erik catch you here he gonna fuck you up” Monique said Monique always been the one to see both sides. “ Girl I don’t care I’m not scared of Erik” Y/N says trying to be bold. “ Y/N we both know that that's a lie.” Monique said while looking straight at Y/N she understands her finally standing her ground but not this way. 

Everybody knew on campus that Erik is crazy and he definitely doesn't play when it comes to Y/N. Monique can only hope Erik or Y/N doesn't do anything wild tonight. “ Well okay you got me there but still he's not my dad nor my boyfriend he doesn't control me”. Y/N said  while trying to tell herself it's okay to have fun. “ You know I can take you back if you want.” Monique said getting ready to start the car.

“ NO I'm not about to waste an outfit especially while looking this good.” Y/N said while getting out of the car. While getting out of the car she already had eyes on her; they've never seen Y/N dressed like that. Monique on the other hand was wearing a nice bodycon dresses that showed off her curves if not her booty better. 

“ You ready to get wasted, Y/N”. Monique said, looping her arm with Y/N.

 “ Ready whenever you are Mo” Y/N said smiling ready to get her party on. It's been so long since she's been to a party and she was ready to have fun.

 --------- 1 Hour Later--------

It's been an hour since Y/N and Monique arrived at the party and Y/N was having the time of her life. So far she smoked 3 blunts with Monique and a few girls from Aarons crew. Y/N whispered to Monique saying she'll be right back.  

Y/N then got up and walked up to one of the coolers and grabbed her Mikes Hard Lemonade. She then spotted two bottles of Hennessy and grabbed one and filled her cup up.  

“ Damn Y/N i didn't know you could pop out like this.” Aaron said, eyeing Y/N up and down. Y/N didn't even notice Aaron was standing next to her.

“ I'll take that as a compliment then so thanks.” Y/N said, grabbing her drinks and trying to walk away from him. He then grabbed her arm to continue having a conversation with her.

“ Wait wait holdup what's the rush” Aaron said while still having her arm in his hands.

“ One can you let me go and second I have to get back to my friends.” Y/N said while trying to jerk her arm out of Aarons.  Y/N started to panic and look around to see if anybody she knew was by her.

“ Okay Okay I'll let you go but there's really no rush your friends can wait “ Aaron said while putting his arm around her waist. 

“ Please let me go. I want to go back to my friends.” Y/N said while trying to get away from him.

 Then she thinks in the back of her mind a move Erik showed her. Y/N then stomped her foot on his and headbutts his chin and ran off to back to her friends.

“ Yo Y/N wait up i just want to talk to you” Aaron said while trying to get up but fails 

Not knowing Corey and Kareem were a few steps away ready to intervene but see she got it covered but they were pulling out their phones to call Erik.

Meanwhile with Erik he was at his apartment rolling up some blunts while trying to study for the test on Monday morning. Yea Erik might be a nigga on the outside but what people that really don’t know him is that he’s a genius to the point that he’s riding a full term scholarship. 

While he was in the mist of lighting him up a blunt he gets a call from Corey.

“ Yooo wassup nigga” Erik said trying to scope out the background.

“ Man nigga you need to get down here fast this nigga Aaron try to pull at Y/N and creeped her out”. Corey said, trying to get out to the patio to give him the full scoop.

“ Nigga creeped her out how”. Erik said standing up while going to unlock his safe to grab his gun.

“ Nigga he spooked her to the point she headbutted him and stomped his foot” Corey said while watching over Y/N with Monique glad to see she safe.

“ Where is she at now”. Erik says, grabbing his keys to his Audi S7.

“ She is with Mo outside next to the pool.” Corey said, still observing the scene.

He then sees Aaron walk up to Y/N and Mo trying to get her attention. He then sees Aaron try to grab Y/N up from her seat when Monique got up and blocked him. Corey couldn't see what was said but knew all hell was about to break loose.

“ Erik you might wanna hurry up cuz this nigga in her face again trying to grab up on her” Corey said in rushed tone trying to get outside fast as possible.

“ Nigga I’m outside”. Was all Erik said before he ended the call.

Meanwhile with Y/N after the incident with Aaron. She ran to find Monique and quickly told her what had just happened. Monique sobered up real fast asking Y/N was she okay.

“ Honestly right now Mo I want to go see Erik”. Y/N said while trying to dry of her chest since he spilled on her when she headbutted Aaron.

“ I can take him to you if you want i do----”. Monique was cut off by Aaron approaching them.

“ Y/N what you did back there wasn't cool we need to talk”. Aaron said while trying to grab Y/N arm again but Monique stood his way.

“ Y/N doesn’t want and doesn't want to talk to you so you can just step” Monique says while taking her off heels to get more leverage.

“ Mind yo Business this is not between you” Aaron said while trying to step up to Monique.

“ Nigga she right there is nothing for you to say to Y/N but all i know is you better step out her face”. Corey said, walking in between them. Everybody on campus also knew anybody who ran with Erik was just as crazy as him. It also didn't help that Corey and Monique were dating.

“ Nigga I don’t have to do shit yall at my party so i can do anything i fucking want.” Aaron said, stepping up to Corey.

“ Nah nigga you don’t because that the case you gonna leave in a body bag” Erik says few steps from behind Aaron.

Erik looked at Aaron ready to kill but he was not gonna bring that side out in front of Y/N. 

“ Y/N come here let's go”. Erik said while moving past Aaron wanting him to do something so he can fuck him up. Y/N immediately stood up to go to Erik's side but was stopped by Aaron who grabbed her arm from behind Erik.

When both Erik and Y/N felt her jerk back they turned their heads to look at was keeping her back. Erik followed the line of sight to see that Aaron was holding her back. Erik then cocked his arm back and punched Aaron in his face hard enough to knock him out. 

While everybody was still in shock about what just happened Erik and Y/N were already in his car pulling off.

Erik looked over at Y/N and  grabbed her by her neck said.

“ I’m about to fuck you up i hope you can handle it”. Erik said. He then let her neck go and zoomed off into the direction of his apartment.

Please give me feedback let me know if you want part 4.

[whump-a-la-mode]

Nemesis - Choose Your Own Whump 2

With A receiving the most votes on my last post, for this adventure we are going with a drugged Villain whumpee. Sorry about the generic name for this one, I really couldn’t think of anything else ^^

I hope you enjoy, and thanks to everyone for replying to the last post! As always, votes can be sent in through any method you want. Comments, asks, and PMs are all just fine. I’ll see it!

CW//Falling off a building, hostage situations, shapeshifting, medical abuse, extensive talk of sedatives, brief mention of a needle

Please note that the third scene of this piece is from the point of view of a drugged character, and thus the scene has some aspects that could be described as unreality. Please skip this scene if this would make you uncomfortable.

The video was grainy.

It was always grainy. That was the strange thing about it-- everyone carried around miniature computers in their pockets, equipped with tiny cameras that would have rivaled the most powerful devices of years prior. Any civilian could take a 4k quality video on some social media, but the moment anything actually important was happening, technology seemed to regress twenty years.

Hero supposed it didn’t matter. Their memory of the incident was certainly clear as day, better than any camera could ever capture.

And yet...

They clicked a button on the remote, and the clip restarted.

The sides of the screen were blocked out in fuzzy grey-- the video having been taken through the bars of a metal fence. Between them, the camera focused at first on the foot of a brown brick building, before panning upwards, only stopping upon reaching the roof. It took a moment for the visual to adjust, focusing against the glare of the sun overhead.

Two figures, on the building’s roof. Two figures seen so often together, in so many similar videos.

The standoff had taken from dawn till sunset. How Villain had gotten into the building unnoticed had yet to be fully understood, but, regardless of method, they wasted little time in taking hostage a group of professors, eating lunch together. A single one had been released, bringing with them a message:

“Everyone leaves. No one comes in. Everyone stays outside the fence.”

It had seemed like a trap, at first. Of course it had. It wouldn’t be the first time that Villain had played such a trick. After much debating, however, evacuation was deemed to be the best option, and the campus was soon barren.

The hours afterwards had been as long and hot as they had been nerve-wracking. The very thought of following orders from Villain made Hero’s stomach twist, but their orders were incredibly clear: Don’t do anything stupid.

It was an incredibly difficult order to follow.

Establishing a line of communication had been the hardest part. Villain had quickly disconnected any security cameras in the vicinity, alongside confiscating any technology their hostages might have held.

In the end, it was decided that a reporter would be the one to go in. One of the most recognizable faces in the city, and one that was neutral. Not fighting for either side, but representing the citizenry.

The whole plan bet on one fact: That the shapeshifting Hero could pull of the imitation.

It worked. At least, it worked for as long as it needed to. Villain accepted the olive branch, and allowed the supposed reporter to enter unharmed.

Of course, the illusion broke as soon as Hero opened their mouth. No matter how good they were at changing their shape, it did not change their voice. In the brief moment of confusion, the hostages had managed to make their escape.

Leaving only the two nemeses, and the building as their battlefield.

It was hard to remember the fight. They had waged so many battles against one another, they all seemed to blend together, at one point or another. There was broken glass, pushed over tables, exploding equipment, and then-

And then they were on the roof.

Villain was stupid, but they weren’t, well, they weren’t stupid. They may have had the moral compass of a kleptomaniac feline, and the brain cells to match, but they had common sense. A sense of self-preservation.

Forcing them to the edge of the roof... it was supposed to be like pushing them to a corner. Trapping them.

In the video, the two figures danced. Forward, and back, until one took the lead. Until they were up against the edge, with nowhere left to go.

They were supposed to stop. They weren’t supposed to fall.

They stopped their own fall, or at least they tried. They were telekinetic. Of course they did. But they were surprised, or confused, or, or something. They slowed themself down. But they did not stop. The force with which they struck the concrete parking lot below was more than enough to knock them out.

The video ended.

And... that was it. The end. Years and years of battles, some won, some lost, all ended. They should have been happy, and they were! They hated Villain, sincerely and truly hated them.

But no other villain fought like them. No other villain had their tongue, their wit. Their skill. Their fight.

Villain’s defeat should have been epic! The ultimate confrontation of good and evil, of chaos, and order.

Yet, their downfall was a simple trip.

In the corner of Hero’s TV screen, small white text helpfully reported to them just when that video had been recorded.

One year ago.

One year, since that day. Since Villain’s downfall. And now...

Hero’s phone buzzed. A text message. The confirmation of a meeting.

One whole year, and still, Hero’s mind was consumed by their lost nemesis.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━   

The diner was terribly busy, and yet, when Hacker walked through the door, Hero had no doubts as to their identity.

Despite their rather stereotypical appearance, there was nothing about the person’s manner that would have indicated the sheer amount of time they spent behind a computer screen. They greeted the receptionist, pointed to Hero, and exchanged a few words beyond that. With a smile, then, they parted, and made their way to Hero’s table.

Their manner only seemed strange when they sat down, and Hero noted that the way they smiled seemed to pain them.

“Is this seriously what you people act like?” They hissed through bared teeth. “Can I stop smiling now? Or will they look at me weird?”

“They’re already looking at you weird.”

“They are?”

“You- You don’t need to do that.”

“Oh thank god.” Immediately, their expression fell into one far more analytic. Far less friendly. “I, uh, don’t get out much.”

“Really?” Hero raised a brow incredulously. 

“I’ve got more important things to do than, uh, than going out. Anyways.” They stuck a hand outwards. It was partially covered by a fingerless glove. “I’m Hacker.”

“I figured.” Hero shook the offered hand. “I’m Hero, though I suppose you already know that.”

“You’d think people here would be, uh, a bit more in awe? It’s not everyday you get to eat in the same building as a superhero.”

“Keep your voice down, please.”

“Oh, sorry. Is it, like, a secret? You don’t have a secret identity, do you?”

“No. But when I’m out of costume, I’m not exactly that recognizable. So let’s keep it that way. Kapish?”

“Kapash. But, still, oh my god. This is so cool! A real life hero...”

“Yeah... Yeah. A real hero alright.”

A hero who could hardly focus during battle. A hero who infuriated their team leader more than they aided them.

“Anyways.” Hacker raised their head, a far more natural smile coming onto their face. “I have the... thing.”

“You mentioned that. It’s about Villain, right?”

“Mhm.”

The person across the booth leaned down, prying a laptop from a carrying case and placing it atop the table. It was a bulky thing, and as soon as it was turned on, the shrill sound of fans struggling not to overheat filled Hero’s head. Hacker clicked around a bit. They gripped the edges of the device, as if about to spin it around, before they stopped, frowning.

“It’s been a year now, hasn’t it?” They commented.

“Since Villain was captured. Yes. 374 days.”

“You remember?”

“Yes.”

“You miss them, don’t you?”

It was so direct. Hero couldn’t help but stutter:

“I don’t- Of course I don’t miss them. I hate them.”

Hacker looked up over the laptop screen to give them an incredulous look. It wasn’t a convincing lie.

“I don’t miss them.” Hero stood their ground. “But I want to make sure they’re contained.”

“I just... I don’t know if this is something you want to see. You’re trying to move on, and-”

“Show me it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. If it’s something to do with their containment, I need to know about it. I can’t let them hurt anyone else.”

“Well, that’s not the problem here. If you’re sure.”

With a sigh, Hacker spun the computer around, so that it’s screen faced Hero.

They weren’t sure what they expected. Some kind of... deep web threat? A message from Villain? A copycat? An escape attempt?

But they didn’t get any of that. Instead, the screen displayed a simple PDF. Medical records. At the top, in bold letters and a rather ostentatious logo, the header read:

Specialized Criminal Rehabilitation Unit of Organization

For the most part, the page was Greek to Hero. A slew of ID numbers and attending physicians with far too many acronyms following their names. What did make sense to them was the spreadsheet that made up most of the page, labelled:

Approved Daily Medication Dosage for Patient: Villain

The spreadsheet took up two pages with solid text. Hero did not recognize the medication names, of course, but they did not need to be a doctor to understand the entries written under the column labelled “Medication Purpose.”

Every single data cell, even as they scrolled to the bottom of the document, contained only one word. The same word.

Sedation

“This is...” Hero muttered, furrowing their brow. Scrolling up and down. This had to be wrong, somehow.

“I don’t understand most of it.” Hacker commented sheepishly. “But, uh, I have a few friends with some more medical knowledge than me. They’ve never seen anything like it. It’s more than enough medication to sedate a fucking elephant- sorry, excuse my language.”

“It’s fine.” The confusion in their voice was rapidly melting to fury.

“Even for major surgical procedures... nothing near this level would ever be used.”

“This has to be a mistake.” Hero shook their head. “A mix-up. Maybe it’s like... all the medications the facility ordered. And they just labelled it wrong.”

“Well, if it’s a mistake, they’ve been making the exact same one for an entire year. I’ve got 374 of these files. Newest one just got uploaded a few hours ago.”

“And they’re always the same?”

“With some minor dosage adjustments, but yes. That’s not, um, that’s not all of it.”

Hacker reached over, dragging the computer back so that it faced them again. There was more clicking this time, along with typing at a speed that made Hero’s fingers hurt, just to watch it.

When the laptop was spun back around, this time, it was a video.

A camera feed.

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Villain felt about to choke on their tongue.

It wasn’t a new feeling. More or less, it was the only thing they felt, anymore. That heavy block of muscle in their mouth, threatening at any moment to block throat choke air no air no-

They were losing their words again. Words... wordsssssss... Voices. Voices spoke words. Sometimes, they did. Sometimes they grumbled and muttered and sputtered and murmured like a car murmured. Cars... or was it cats? No, cats didn’t murmur. They purred. What else did they do? Not bark... no, barking too loud for cats. Cat go mew mew, real quiet like.

Cat’s meow, that is a cat’s voice. There were other voices, too. Quiet like cats. Two of them, two voices. They knew those voices, those were the doctors’ voices. The doctors liked to talk a lot. They talked, but they did not see. Or... no. They were not seen. Villain did not see them. They wanted to, but their eyes were broken. The engines in their eyelids would not run anymore, would not open the garage door, Sally!

One of the doctors’ voices got closer. A million miles away, a hand was laid upon Villain’s wrist, flipping over their hand so that their palm faced downward.

“Let’s move it.”

It was a silly thing to say. Nothing moved in this place. Nothing that Villain could see, as their eyes were broken.

“Is the other vein healed enough?”

“It’s going to have to be.”

Silly words... Villain wanted to laugh, but their muscles were firmly locked away behind a padlock.

“Okay.” The doctor sounded so sad. Why were they so sad? Villain’s mouth was full of soil. The doctor was tired. “I’ll get the rest of the medicines.”

“We’re going 30 milligrams up from yesterday on the Propofol.”

“Oh? Why?”

“They opened their eyes, yesterday.”

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Hero felt sick. In the top right corner of the security footage, the same logo from the medical records was displayed. The Specialized Criminal Rehabilitation Unit of Organization. Below it, a subtitle.

“Keeping the city safe.”

Was this safety? It shouldn’t have been. They had known, of course, what had happened to Villain after their capture and very brief hospital stay. It was what happened to all villains. They were sent to the rehab unit.

A therapy program. Helping villains to control their powers and reform their lives. To return them to the straight and narrow. But, now that Hero thought about it...

Villain was the only one who had never been released.

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Thanks so much for reading! Just like last time, there are two options along with every part of this story. Alongside each options is a question, so that you guys can give more specific suggestions if you so wish. The option that receives the most votes will be the choice that our Hero makes!

A.) Tell someone about what is happening - Who should Hero tell? (They are on a small team, as well as part of a larger Organization, for reference.)

B.) Attempt a more direct approach. Visit Villain in the rehab program - Should Hero try to rescue Villain immediately?

[some-dr-writings]

Gundham x shy reader who asks for kisses

·       Gundham always found himself enjoying his time with you, you were by far one of his greatest companions in this life. With how shy and meek you seemed to be when you first met, he never thought someone like you would become his partner, he always imagined that if he were to find one they’d be more outwardly bold, yet he fell for you.

·       Time and time again he had seen you try to approach others only to back out, running away in the end. It seemed you might have had a social anxiety of sorts, there had been several times where he had happened upon you after running, leaning against a wall breathing heavily, telling yourself that everything was alright. It was a rather pitiful state to find a person in, Mikan for as… flighty as she was could at least stammer out a few words to people if they talked to her, you on the other hand ended up just blabbering nonsense.

·       Well he thought what you spoke was gibberish till one day he found a little tablet on his desk. Curiously he turned on the device and was met with a box of text. “In a fairy tale kingdom far, far away peoples anxieties exist as monsters who follow them around. Tired of their monsters getting in the way of making friendships a shepherd and riddle solver devise a plan to meet without their anxieties. A river divides their lands and in that great river, a single, small island. There they would meet. First they would capture their anxieties and meet on the island in case they escaped to still be away from them. The shepherd successfully captured his monsters but the riddle solver failed, and more monsters were born of the failure, the riddle solver now having “hopelessness”. Can you get the shepherd and the riddle solver to the island? There are several conditions to this however. 1, no monsters can be with the shepherd and the riddle solver on the island, 2, with every trip the boat makes across the river another monster will find the riddle solver, the shepherd’s monsters will find him every other turn, 3, if the shepherd or the riddle solver are with 5 of their monsters they will be consumed and it’s game over, 4, if the shepherd or riddle solver are left with their monsters for three turns they will be consumed by anxiety and it’s game over, 5, the boat needs two people to row it they can be human, monster or both, but the river is too powerful for only one to move the boat”

·       Tapping the screen he was greeted to a picture on a person on each side of a river, one of them with a black creatures beside them as well as a boat, and island in the middle of the river. There were also buttons at the top labeled “rules and “hints” and such. The style seemed to be like a picture book. After some tapping around he learned the controls and intrigued by whatever this exactly was he played along. Eventually he found a way for them to meet, but it took much trial and error, and was certainly not helped by the fact he refused to check the hints. In the end when he did beat it he was instructed to leave the tablet in between specific books in the library.

·       The next day on his desk he found that tablet again, this time with a new game in it and once beaten, instructed him to hide it in the library once more. Over and over this went on.

·       Once more he had solved the mystery of the new game, however he found the library was about to close. Not wanting to have to wait another day for another fun game he and his devas raced for the library. Though everyone was being ushered out Gundham charged through, bolting straight for the appointed section, the crossroads between mathematics and history. There he spotted you, pulling out a book then looking in between books, sliding them over, a tablet exactly like the one Gundham held in hand tucked under your arm. “… Excuse me-” A high pitched squeak sound escaped you as you flipped around, looking to the Dark Overlord, dropping your tablet in the process. “A-ah, oh, uh, h-hi- uh ummm, hamster squeaking, lost, find the-” Then you ran, leaving behind your tablet. Turning it on Gundham found the new mystery had to do with a woman dying and her sister getting her pet hamsters but the person who was to deliver the hamsters to her lost them in a pet store, and though the sister never saw the hamsters before, she could recognize them by their squeaks always hearing them in the background of her video calls with her sister, and the mystery was to figure out which hamsters made which squeaks in the giant group of them.

·       “Hmm, so the hiding soul speaks riddles…”

·       After the encounter Gundham did research on you, he didn’t know your name or talent, but since Hope’s Peak attendees were always a hot topic on the internet he was sure he could find something on you and that he did, Y/N the Super High School Level Enigmatologist.

·       “Hint.” “AH! Oh, uh, huh?” Before you could panic you were consumed in confusion seeing the dark brooding man before you, holding your latest puzzle before you. It was on the hint page, strange since he had never used the hints before. “Your words fall on deaf ears. Extract the meaning of this!” “… uh… n-new hint? Okay.” And so you began mumbling to yourself about the puzzle, while trying to not give away the answer till you came up with a new hint. Then after Gundham had solve it and was given a new puzzle to solve, he insisted that you give him a new hint again, then again with the next puzzle. Every time there after he came to you, asking for a new hint.

·       Gundham was rather intrigued by you, who found comfort in puzzle solving, getting lost in finding solutions to strange problems. He was willing to help meet you half way across the river, secluded on an island with you, away from the monsters that consumed you anywhere else, he wanted to get to know you without them in the way.

·       He rather liked so much about you, how passionate you were about your craft, going on rants about it for hours, your willingness and even enthusiasm to learn about his passions, how despite your anxieties you always tried your damnest to become a better person and push through them, how you never were confused by his words, always understanding him, how that even extended to his body language and understanding his boundaries on touch.

·       You were a rather logical sort even if your emotions of fears tended to get the best of you. It was only natural since you always were working on puzzles. Even emotions to an extent were logical to you. You saw everything, even yourself as a puzzle to be solved, and so often times the solution to aches and pains was affection. Usually you’d ask Gundham what he thought of you, knowing you’d only receive honesty which was mostly praise. Eventually after a long time you would get to hold hands or hug.

·       It was a rather lazy, sleepy day, it was just so peaceful, before Gundham knew it the day had already passed and it was past dinner time. “Hmm? Y/N?” Usually you’d have come to see him by dinner, but it seemed you never showed up. Did something happen? Sitting up from his desk he found his devas before him. “Ah, so you know where my mate hides?” He slowly got up following him companions.

·       “… the closet?” They simply sniffed at the door, and cautiously he opened it. “Ah!” You sat on the floor, curled up in a ball, cowering in the corner silently. It… had been a very long time since Gundham had last seen you in such a state, it had taken him aback for a moment and there he stood, his mind blank. “G-gundham… affection ple-please.” Your voice cracked and wavered, your breathing ragged. And hearing it almost brought tears to the Ice Lord’s eyes. Did… did you have a panic attack, and he never noticed? Why else would you sound so wreaked?

·       He slinked into the closet, closing the door behind himself before sitting beside you. Taking a deep breath, he took one of your hands into both of his own, squeezing it tightly. “Of course my Emperor, one who unravels the world, who reveals the truth behind veils of deceit. How could I not? You who takes my heart each and every moment, you who I cherish so dearly, you who is so cunning, what possible words could I have other than praise and love?” He felt how tight you squeezed his hand, how you trembled. He was not sure this would be enough this time, he had failed to be by our side when you needed it most.

·       “… My Emperor. Would you be so kind as to unravel my next words?” “… a riddle?” “Yes. Would you solve my riddle?” “o-okay.” “I… I, uh…” Preferably Gundham wanted to come up with a good riddle, one that you would have to think on for a long time, but he doubted he could come up with one. You had asked for affection so maybe… “I am… I am one action that can only ever be shared by two at a time. I am a way to show love. I am… uh… I am-” “A hug?” “…” Slowly Gundham wrapped his arms around you. “I am… something Gundham has never shared with you before.” “Huh? Something……… a kiss?”

·       Damn it. Gundham thought the darkness would make this easier but it only made him more anxious. Placing his hands on your shoulders, he clutched them in a tight grip. Okay! He could do this! He could hug you, and this was less contact than a hug, so he could do this!

·       “of course… someone as brilliant as you could solve my twisted words.” Leaning into you, he felt as if his heart were trembling. Even in darkness he closed his eyes. He tenderly pressed his lips to your forehead for a few moments before somehow managing to loosen the grip on our shoulders, though his fingers were still tense. Slowly he traced them up your neck as he pressed his lips on the bridge of your nose. Finally his hands stopped, cradling your head in them, allowing him to easily kiss your cheeks.

·       “P-perhaps… we can… prepare a meal for ourselves and by the time we’re finished I’ll have come up with an even more confounding riddle for you.”

[trashforhockeyguys]

Don't Hold Me -15- Carter Hart

A/N: Hi things are wild now. Are things, talks about sex. Like...a lot in the first part of this chapter. And um the very end of this chapter could be triggering? No harm comes to anyone, but it’s the start of it all. So please be aware of that moving forward. Other than that, all previous parts are linked in my master list and I hope you enjoy.

Your whole body was warm. Carter was still next to you, looking at you with something more than just love. There was love, so much love. The two of you said it time and time again in the previous hours. His fingers danced lazily across the bare skin of your shoulders and back. You felt nothing but content in his arms, in his bed. It was like everything was just as it was meant to be. You were right where you were always supposed to land.

“This is nice,” You whispered, feeling like any sound would ruin the perfect morning. 

Warm light was coming in from the windows, the sun still working its way up the morning sky. Though the two of you had been awake for hours, you still felt like the world was waiting for one of you to make the first move. Almost as if everything outside was frozen, just waiting. 

“Yeah, it really is,” He replied, voice soft and deep. 

“A girl could really get used to this,” You smiled and shifted closer to him, wincing a bit as your muscles protested the movement. 

Carter seemed to take notice, worry flooding his face, “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

You smiled softly, oddly comforted by his worry. But Carter was arguably the gentlest person you knew, he’d rather hurt himself than hurt you. You ran your fingers through his messy hair. Your heart seemed to ache at the thought that he believed that he hurt you. 

“You didn’t hurt me,” You said softly, “Far from it actually. Trust me.”

“Y/N-”

“Carter, that was arguably the best sex I’ve had. I’m more than fine.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the shock that took over his face. You knew that was the last thing he expected you to say. You were always so quiet and shy, he didn’t expect you to be so bold. You leaned over to kiss him. You hadn’t imagined at the start of the school year that you’d be here, but you couldn’t say that you were mad about it, not in the slightest. 

“I don’t think you’ve ever been that direct before,” He marveled, still not entirely sure he heard you right. 

“You should’ve known me before, I was nothing if not blunt,” You laughed, “Got me into a lot of trouble.”

You tried not to think about exactly what kind of trouble. Exactly why you weren’t that fearless girl anymore. Or who made sure you weren’t that girl. You tried not to think about the fact that he was still in the city. He promised he would be back, and one thing about him was that he never broke his word. No matter how vile it was. 

“So,” Carter said, breaking the silence and pulling you away from your thoughts, “Best sex?”

Your face burned with a blush as you attempted to hide your face in his chest. He laughed, wrapping his arms back around you. You felt like this was normal, like this was how life was meant to be. You were meant to wake up next to him, joke around with him, live this life with him. 

He held you tighter and kissed the top of your head. You couldn’t understand how this felt so normal. Like you’d been spending all of your mornings like this. Like nothing was ever any different. Now you really wished that nothing ever had to change. You’d be happy if you woke up like this every morning. 

“It was amazing,” He whispered to you, “You’re amazing.”

“Shut up,” You groaned, trying to cover the strange sense of embarrassment that you felt. 

“I love you,” His hand gently ran through your hair, soothing you. 

“I love you,” You didn’t even have to think about a reply. You loved him, so much. Why try and hide that now? He knew. And you were more than happy about that. 

In the warm light of the morning, you were both able to say it, without having to feel like you had to hide it. You could snuggle into that feeling and never let it go, you’d be more than happy to do that. You almost wanted to follow him anywhere because of it. You weren’t sure if you could make it an entire summer without seeing him. 

“I like hearing you say that,” You could hear his smile without even having to see it. 

You smiled. You could hear his heartbeat, steady and strong. You decided that it was one of the best sounds in the whole world. Everything about him was just addicting to you, his voice, his smile, his laugh, all of it. You didn’t want to change anything about him. You didn’t want to change anything about being with him.

Your phone started ringing from the nightstand next to you, no doubt Kora trying to figure out what time you were going to be back on campus. The two of you had to meet up with a couple other people from one of your classes for a group project, which you weren’t exactly looking forward to. 

“No, turn it off,” Carter protested, “You’re staying here all day.”

“Cart, I can’t,” Even you were disappointed about that fact, “I have a project I have to work on.”

“What if I just don’t let you get up?”

“Do you want me to fail my class?” You questioned, knowing he was joking with you. 

“If it meant I could keep you in my bed all day, then maybe.”

“Says the man who never went to college.”

He laughed, almost snorted in fact. You were too comfortable with him, far too comfortable. But you didn’t hate it, you savored it in fact. You only wished you found him sooner. You wished you would’ve allowed yourself to open up to him before now, things could’ve been like this all along. 

“I have to go.”

“No.”

“Carter, I’ll be back. It’s just a couple of hours,” You laughed, poking his bare chest.

“Ugh, fine. Leave me,” He groaned, dramatically joking. 

You couldn’t help but laugh as you leaned up to kiss him again. You felt heat spread through your body,and for a moment you considered just staying in bed with him. You could call Kora and claim you were sick, and she could make up a better reason as to why you didn’t show up. But you also knew that you couldn’t exactly afford a bad grade on this, especially given that the professor was a hardass. 

You sat up, wrapping the blanket around your naked body. Your legs shook as you stood, taking the blanket with you as you did. Behind you, Carter protested to you taking his blanket, grabbing for the sheets. You ran into the closet to grab some clothes. You could hear his laugh as the blanket drug behind you. 

You came out a few minutes later, dressed in a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants that were Carter’s. He was scrolling through something on his phone, a soft smile tugged at his lips as he typed out something. 

You leaned against the doorframe and just watched him for a moment. A few moments of just pure peace. A mundane morning, simple, normal. Something you’d craved for years. 

“Travis told me to tell you to ‘get off your ass’ and go see him,” Carter nearly snorted, “Said you haven’t replied to his texts this morning.”

You smiled and walked back over to him, dropping the blanket back onto the bed, “We’ll, I was preoccupied.”

“Yeah don’t think he needs to know that.”

You laughed, knowing Travis would likely have a heartattck and then try to murder Carter. You leaned down to kiss him again, wishing you could just stay with him, because that’s truly all you wanted to do. 

“I’ll be back later. I promise.”

“Tell Kora I said hi,” He waited until you were almost out of sight before he added, “You look good in my clothes.”

“Shut up,” You laughed, grabbing your bag and the few books you brought over. 

The ride back to campus seemed shorter than you remembered. The whole way, you just kept replaying the previous hours you spent with Carter. The thought of every gentle touch, every kiss, every movement...you didn’t think there could be a moment more perfect than those you shared this morning.

Kora was buried in her course notes when you got into the dorm. She didn’t often look disheveled, not in a way that wasn’t intentional, but she looked like she’d been up all night. Her whole body was moving to the beat of the music that was playing in her headphones. 

When you walked bay, you pulled back one of her headphones, “Honey I’m home.”

“Hey,” She said not phased, “Oh hey, wait something fell out of your notebook yesterday, it’s on your desk.”

“Oh, probably one of my thousands of notes from Hartman’s lecture on Monday,” You waved it off and jumped on your bed, “I swear I have to take notes at the speed of light to keep up in that class.”

“Hold you Hartman was the Devil’s Spawn.”

You shrugged and grabbed a pillow to hug, feeling the need for something, “How was your night?”

“Spent a lot of it on the phone with Ethan while I worked on a paper,” She finished writing something and then turned around, “How was your night?”

“Carter played great, and we just kinda hung out.”

“Did you tell him you love him?”

You shrugged, “Something like that.” 

“Oh my god, you? Wow, okay. Do we need to talk about this? Are you okay?” She instantly shifted into a big sister mode, sitting down in front of you on your bed, “You’re okay right?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” You replied honestly, “I’m happy. Kora...I’m really really happy.”

She smiled, like a weight was lifted off of her shoulders, “Thank God. I really like Carter.”

There was something about finally saying that you were happy, finally at peace that made your heart kind of soar. You were happy with him. Happier than you thought you could be. You didn’t understand how you’d gone from trying to keep him as far away from you as possible to this in a couple of months.

“We need to go,” She said, rounding her up her bags, “We’re going to be late and we all need that A.”

Later on that week, you were happily sitting on the couch at Travis’s place with Nolan while Travis dug around in the fridge for a drink. None of you were really paying attention to the movie playing on the TV. Instead, you were all just enjoying the company. 

“Hey! Don’t touch my food!” You swatted at Nolan’s hand. 

“You said I could have some!”

“That is not what I said and you know it!”

“No, I’m pretty sure you said you would share,” Travis chimed in, grabbing a chip from you.

“Damnit you two, let me eat!”

They both laughed and settled back into their seats. You felt bad for not spending more time with them. There was a time when Travis and Nolan were the only people you had in the city. So much had changed since the first time Travis called you after you moved here. Hell, so much had changed since the start of this season alone. None of you were the same people. You certainly weren’t the same. 

“Oh yeah, can I draw you guys for my final project? We have to do a portrait series, and a bunch of other things,” You told them, “It’s worth a shit ton of my grade.”

“Kid, you’ve been drawing me since the day I met you,” Travis laughed, “As long as you get an A, and draw my good side I don’t care.”

“Not a kid Trav, but thanks for that,” You laughed, “I won’t make you sit for it this time. Just wanted permission from you two.”

“Yeah, I don’t care,” Nolan replied, taking another bite out of his sandwich. 

“Cool,” You were getting ready to grab more food when Travis’s hand snuck over and grabbed more chips, “I swear to god Travis! Try that one more time and you lose that hand! See how easy it is to play hockey and fish then!”

“Easy man, She’s hangry.”

“Damn right I am, you two keep taking my food,” you couldn’t help but laugh at both men. 

After the three of you finished eating, Travis pulled out the controllers for the Xbox, stating that Nolan needed to get his ass beat in NHL by you. The two of them always seemed to find a way to remind you what it felt like to be a kid. They made things simpler, easier to work through. 

The following hours were spent screaming at one another and the TV during many games of NHL. How those two could play the real thing all the time and still want to play the game still surprised you. But you were happy because of it. It meant you got to spend more time with both of them. 

There was no need for questions, or anything like that. Instead, you just played the game and screamed at one another non stop. When you were with them, you felt like a teenager again. Like you were still back home, playing NHL in the basement with Ethan and Travis and a couple of the other guys on that team.

Travis’s apartment was home in ways you couldn’t really explain. But it was home. 

“So, Carter’s treating you right, isn’t he?” Travis asked when Nolan went to the bathroom, “Because I swear I’ll beat his ass raw if he isn’t.”

You laughed. Travis was uncomfortable, but he knew that since Ethan had home back home, it was his job to look after you. Even if that meant potentially threatening one of his own teammates. He loved Carter, but he loved you more. You were his sister. The sister he never had, and he would take care of you for as long as you’d let him.

“Carter is perfect, you don’t need to worry Travis.” You assured him. 

“Perfect? Hartsy? Okay.”

You laughed and bit your thumb, “Trust me, you don’t want details.” 

“Huh?” He looked away from the TV, the realization of what you said finally setting in, “Oh. OH. No! No thank you. You can keep that to yourself. I don’t need that image in my head. Remind me to shoot for the 5-hole and miss at practice tomorrow.”

You grabbed the pillow next to you and lobbed it at his head, both of you starting to laugh uncontrollably. You felt light, free. You missed feeling like this when you were with both of them. You weren’t worried about a thing as Travis handed you and Nolan a beer and went back for one of his own. You weren’t thinking about anything aside from trash talking both of them as they played against each other. You were free. Finally. 

The sun was starting to set when your phone went off with a text from Carter. You smiled almost automatically. Travis and Nolan both nudged you, making fun of your sudden shift. But secretly, they loved that Carter was able to make you this happy and this at ease. 

Travis hadn’t seen you like this since you were in your early teens, and Nolan only saw a glimpse or two when you were very very drunk. For Travis, it was like a weight was finally off his chest, he could breathe easier knowing you’d found a way to put yourself back together. And Nolan was happy to finally be getting to know the real you. 

“Seems I was right,” Travis laughed, “You did like Carter. Told you that you just needed to give him a chance.”

“Asshole. I have to go, he’s waiting outside. Apparently, he’s taking me out for dinner.”

“We have to give you back so soon?” Nolan whined. 

You smacked his arm and got up to grab your bag, “You two have a good practice tomorrow, and try not to murder him?”

Travis wrapped you into a right hug, “I could never. He makes you too happy. I don’t want to be responsible for taking that away.”

You ruffled Nolan’s hair as you walked back by, “See you two later. I’m reinstating our weekly lunches.”

“Finally!” Nolan yelled, “You pick better places than TK. He eats shit.”

“We’ll, I’ll pick somewhere good.”

Hours after dinner, you and Carter slowly made your way back to the apartment. Both of you were still laughing about a joke he made before you even left dinner. You felt as if you were in your own little world with him. It was just the two of you. 

You kissed in the elevator, not even caring if anyone saw. You had never really been like this before. You were carefully and calculated. Yet Carter made you want to be everything other than that. You wanted to be reckless and crazy with him.

“Woah, hey hey hey,” He pushed against your shoulders to stop you, and then tucked you behind him, “Stay here.”

You looked up, seeing exactly what he was. The door to the apartment was open. He never left it open. You knew that. He always locked it. It wasn’t meant to be open. He carefully took a few steps towards the door and nudged it open the rest of the way. The lights were all on, but the whole apartment was quiet. 

“Carter-”

“Shh,” He whispered, walking further inside. 

You followed closely behind him. You clutched onto his arm as you made your way into the kitchen. Glass was shattered all over on the floor, the flowers you brought here a few days ago were trampled and strewn across the living room. The whole apartment was ransacked. 

“We need to call the cops, and the building security,” Carter told you, “This is...I have to call.”

He rubbed his face and stepped away, fishing his phone out of his back pocket. You took a few slow steps towards the bedroom. Clothes were everywhere, pictures thrown. Your chest hurt. Tears burned your eyes as you saw a picture of Carter and you had been torn and the frame smashed. Your safe place was gone now. 

“They’ll be up here in a few more minutes,” Carter told you, walking into the bedroom, “And the Police are just behind.”

“Carter,” You turned around, tears running down your cheeks now. 

“It’s going to be okay,” He pulled you into a tight hug, kissing the top of your head, “We’ll fix this.”

Your gut twisted when you heard people entering the apartment. He pulled away and hurried to meet them. Every sense of safety disappeared when you noticed the piece of paper on your pillow. You didn’t have to look at it to know who it was from. To know who did this. 

You slowly made your way over to it, unfolding it. 

I TOLD YOU. YOU OWE ME. YOU CANT HIDE BEHIND YOUR PERFECT LIFE. ILL BURN IT TO THE GROUND LIKE YOU BURNED MINE. HAVE FUN BEING HIS WHORE. HE WONT WANT YOU WHEN IM DONE.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe. You quickly folded the note and shoved it into your pocket when you heard Carter and whoever was with him approaching the room. You tried not to think about the fact that he had been here. He found a way to destroy everything again and again. 

You could hear all of them talking, but words didn’t register to you. Not when a simple piece of paper felt like a million pounds in your pocket. You didn’t think that he would ever go this far. You didn’t think that, after everything, he would be capable of doing this. 

You jumped when Carter touched you. You weren’t sure how long you’d been standing there. Or how long people had been talking all around you. 

“I’m going to take you back to campus,” He said quietly, “I’m going to go stay with one of the guys.”

You wanted to protest, to say that you didn’t want to leave him. However, you couldn’t find any words. You could hardly move or breathe. Carter tried not to let the worry eat at him as he drove you back to your dorm. He tried to remind himself that this was harder for you than he could understand. You had so few places that you felt safe in, so few people that you felt safe with. And somehow, one of those places was ripped from you tonight. No one seemed to know how it was even possible for someone to get into the building or into the apartment. 

You were shaking in your seat, your hands cold as ice. He could see that you were fighting against something, but he didn’t know how to help. He didn’t know what he was meant to do. He could see you retreating further into yourself. He could see you slipping further and further away. He felt his own type of panic, he didn’t want to lose you. But he could feel it happening. 

“Do you want me to stay with you?” He asked, desperate for anything. He would sleep on the floor next to your bed if he had to. He just wanted you to know that you weren’t alone. 

You shook your head. You didn’t want him near you. Not if it meant he could be in danger. You didn’t want to hurt Carter, or be the reason that he life had to change. So if you had to, you would remove yourself from his life. You would shoulder that hurt, and everything that could go with your past. If to only save him. If only to keep him from seeing the same horrors that threatened to keep you up every night. 

“Kora is on her way out to meet us. So you don’t have to walk up alone,” He told you, trying to reach over for your hand. 

You flinched away, momentarily forgetting it was only Carter. You could see the hurt on his face. You hadn’t flinched away from him in months. You trusted him, or at least he thought you did. But that simple movement made him feel like it would all come crashing down. 

“Good night Carter,” You whispered when you saw Kora running out of the dorm.

“Y/N...I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do.”

You could hear the pain without even looking at Carter. You hated this. You hated that you didn’t know what else to do. You hated that even in Philadelphia, he was still finding a way to ruin your life. All because you were the one who dared to try to put a stop to him.

 You hated that Carter was now brought into this, and you didn’t know how to really save him. You had no idea what you were meant to do. Not when it was your fault. He had a career and something like this could surely ruin it. You knew the media would know about the breakin, and people would start asking questions. 

All you knew to do was push him away, and keep pushing until he would be safe. Keep pushing until he wasn’t a target anymore. Until Carter was out of the picture, and all that remained was you. 

“Good night,” You said again, voice feeling smaller as you closed the door. 

You could feel your heart cracking with every step away from him that you took. You were drawing a new line in the sand, and this one couldn’t be crossed. Not with Carter at stake. You loved him...and it was because you loved him that you needed him to stay as far away from you as possible. It was because you loved him that you had to leave him. You had to make sure that he would have peace in his life...not the war that was beginning. 

“Sweetie, are you okay?” Kora threw her arms around you, she was just as scared as you were. 

“No…”

“Okay, c’mon lets get you inside.”

She turned to wave at Carter. You wondered if he knew how hard this would be for you. You wondered if he knew that you were hurting just like he was. Kora kept an arm around you as the two of you made your way back into your dorm room. It felt so small compared to Carter’s apartment. Your bed, which was less than half the size of his, felt so cold. Even if your body took up most of the space. 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No...I just want to go to sleep.”

She sighed and turned out her lamp, “I’m here. Whenever you decide you’re ready. You aren’t alone in this.”

All you wanted to tell her was that you were. In order to minimize the damage, you had to be. You had to face all of this on your own. Just so that you could protect all of them. You wouldn’t let them become collateral in something you started years before you came here. You would face him on your own...because you had to. Because this time, it was your turn to protect them.

[otp-holic]

The one place (where something happened) (A03)

“In your life there are a few places, or maybe only the one place, where something happened, and then there are all the other places.” Alice Munro. (or the one where they receive a letter from a familiar name and we go into 4Ks of fluff around a lost afternoon in France)

4K. Lamely explicit at one point. Fanfic + Pictures Inside. Trigger for FLUFF as the main plot. Part of the Never let us lose what we have gained series (AO3)

This was supposed to be a manip with 200 words of bantering and it's now 4Ks of fluff with a few pictures. I've decided to leave them inside the cut because I feel they work better with its context there. I'm sorry for the hassle, but I really hope you give this a chance... unless you have cavities, only like fics with amazing plots or are allergic to shameless fluff.

Please do not repost the pictures, I know this is futile, but… I try :)

DAGUERROTYPE, France 1944 Private Collection.

Steve is cooling down from his very early run, enjoying the feeling of the pink sunrise looming over the awakening Brooklyn streets as he walks the last couple of blocks on the way home, when his phone beeps.

“Check your actual mailbox, we dropped something for you there. I think you should appreciate us making it old-fashioned just for you, grandpas!”

Steve smiles at Sam’s text and as soon as he arrives at their building he snaps a picture of the very common and flat envelope with “Barnes&Rogers” scribbled on top of a Stark Logo, to send along his response.

“Nice try, but this is inaccurate. A letter would have never made its way to us without an address or stamp. We’ll send you a proper thank you card to show you how it’s done.”

He can’t help but chuckle at his own joke rereading the text while he opens the door, and when he looks up from his phone and into the kitchen, he is received by a sleepy Bucky looking at the coffee machine like he looks at Steve during their most soft and embarrassingly cheesy moments.

“You love that thing more than you love me, confess it.”

“In the mornings? Yes. I don’t even like you in the mornings most of the time,” he answers matter of factly. “Want some?”

Steve playfully wiggles an eyebrow.

“No way. Your sweaty self is tempting, but coffee smells better. I might join you in the shower later.” Bucky offers him one of the two cups he has poured and he notices the envelope Steve is holding. “What is that?”

“We’ve got mail!” He hands it to Bucky. “I have no idea what's on it, but Sam texted me to say they had something delivered to our mailbox and there it was. Open it.”

Bucky leaves the cup on the counter, face sparked with a curiosity that makes him look twenty-one (and Steve weak on the knees), and goes for it.

The content is a bit underwhelming at first glance: Another envelope, white, no Stark logo, but topped with a bright green post-it with a note on Pepper’s script.

“This got to me via PR. We analyzed it and checked with the source (no peeking, I swear) and it seems legit. With that return address, it’s likely to arouse your interest. Love, P.”

Bucky tears off the post-it and the letter is revealed to be addressed to Steve Rogers at the Stark Tower, but it is when they turn it around when everything goes still for a second.

The return address is some street in Marseille, but what has Steve’s mouth dry and Bucky’s hand trembling just a bit is the combination of the place and the name written on top: Emmanuelle Jaques Dernier.

“Boom?”, Bucky says, trying to cut through their heavy hearts and taking Steve’s hand. It’s a terrible terrible joke, but Dernier would have loved it and he grins.

“That’s a terrible terrible joke,” Steve verbalizes, “but I think at least we’ve reached the same conclusion.”

“Elementary, my dear Steve,” Bucky answers as he opens the second envelope, only to reveal a folded letter and yet another envelope. “It’s a fucking vault of paper!”

Steve takes the letter from him, unfolds it, and quickly scans it (normal office paper, printed, hand-signed) before he starts reading it out loud to Bucky’s undivided attention.

“Dear Mr. Rogers,

My name is Emmanuelle Dernier and I am the great-grandson of Jaques Dernier of the Howling Commandos.

First, let me tell you that we all in our family grew up with amazing stories and praise for you, Sergeant Barnes, and the rest of the team. I never got to meet my great-grandfather or any of them (you), but I’ve always felt like I did.

In fact, that’s the ultimate reason behind this letter: I ached to honor him and I’ve been putting in order all his remaining letters, pictures, and memories so they don’t get lost forever, and there are many things I’m discovering through this journey. So many pictures and tiny details… and amongst them, you and the rest of the Commandos appear at the most random and memorable moments. Nothing that’s going to make it into history books, more like the stories my grandpa used to share with us over and over again, those important tidbits that make him more human.

Anyway, I was going through the pictures he kept when I came across some war photos that didn’t seem to match the 40s timeframe. Typical daguerreotypes from the 20s in a very bad state, probably taken with a camera from the era in 1944 and developed on a later date by somebody who clearly didn’t master the technique.

They were in a very bad state and hidden inside an envelope that said “Terribly drunk soldiers in France making idiots of ourselves in unique and creative ways. Fun evening, horrible hangover. About 20 miles west of the Maginot Line. Autumn ‘44”. I’m attaching a photocopy of that, I hope you can understand my decision to keep the original.

After restoring the daguerreotypes with some experts, all I got were five very bad pictures with silhouettes of people apparently having fun…. but there was one that got a lot better in the cleaning process that feels important somehow. I’m sending the original, as well as the restored version I got.

I, of course, don’t have the whole context, but I hope it brings back a good memory. My great-grandpa might be in the picture, but I don’t think this one belongs to my family or to a museum.

Thank you for your service, I really hope this letter finds its way to you.

E.Dernier.”

“I can’t believe… Steve, most days I’m convinced that day and that place are a figment of my imagination,” Bucky smiles, remembering. “When I think of a moment of pure joy during the war, I think about that afternoon in France, and it always feels unreal. A bubble of air and laughter while we were so surrounded by death.”

Steve nods, reminiscing about that warm and humid September morning when they arrived at yet another abandoned and destroyed little village, this one about twenty miles west of the Maginot Line. They had orders to lie low and wait for twenty-four hours before they started the maneuver to wipe another Hydra base off the map, and that little town was perfect for that.

Among bomb debris and fallen walls, they found one small building miraculously standing next to the remains of the church, so they decided to set camp under a roof for a change since the weather was being a little flickery with the rain, and they had the rare luxury of time.

The inside of the tiny house was as unusual as the outside: nothing was destroyed beyond being dusty and worn by time, and everything they found (furniture, kitchenware, and even fabrics) belonged more to Steve and Bucky’s early childhoods than to 1944, a living museum frozen in time.

Only it was not a museum, but the parish house left untouched and non-raided: old-fashioned clothes, outdated church books, yellowing clergy collars, and, of course, the wine cellar. Oh, that wine cellar… the havoc it unleashed.

“I remember the absolute excitement when Falsworth found all those bottles of old unscathed mass wine from the parish,” Steve brings his memory to words, looking at Bucky, “I’m still a little convinced that we are going to hell for drinking them.”

“Not for that, probably, but it was a wonder nobody died on the spot of wine poisoning, it tasted like sweet vinegar, ugh.”

“But it did his part, right? Took our minds off things; got us drunk, bold and silly.” Steve answers.

“Apparently not all of us,” Bucky says very seriously, looking at Steve.

“Technicalities… I got drunk by proxy. Seeing you all so happy made me giddy and tipsy, too.”

“I came and went… I remember being a little surprised at the clarity of my thoughts at some moments there when some of the guys were basically drooling on the floor. Now I understand, of course.”

Steve squeezes his hand, not much to be said there.

They were already way too drunk by the early afternoon, drinking to the sound of a sudden rainstorm pouring outside. All of them scattered across the small dusty living room and its adjoining kitchen while they went through all the bottles of wine they had been able to find. Cheering for the foregone priest every time somebody raised a glass, and laughing as if there were no ruins or war on the other side; just silly men (boys, really) laughing their hearts out.

“Earth to Steve… I don’t know about you, but I’m dying to see what the hell that envelope is hiding. Especially now that we know about its time stamp.”

“I’m sorry, me too! Gabe drunkenly handling that old camera and those glass plaques the way he did? I’m honestly impressed that he was able to take any pictures at all,” he muses. “Shit, is it weird that I’m nervous?”

“I’m gonna save us the bantering because I’m nervous, too,” Bucky answers in all sincerity. “Truth is, Steve, I remember everything about that day.”

It’s a new admission, a newly opened door for them because for some reason, they have never talked about that peaceful surreal afternoon, and Steve nods in recognition as he silently goes for the envelope one-handed, not wanting to let go of Bucky’s hand because his surface is way cooler than his wrenching insides. Maybe the picture is an overexposed french wall but maybe…

The photo he extracts from the envelope is clearly the original and damaged one Emmanuelle specified in his letter. Anybody else looking at it would see nothing beyond Dernier’s blurry profile, but since Steve and Bucky were there when this was taken, they know exactly what moment Steve is holding in his hand.

“Buck,…” is all Steve can say, struck by the blurry keepsake.

Later in the afternoon when they had already consumed most of the wine and there was not a single coherent thought left in the room, one of the guys took the parish books and besottedly announced that there was a wedding set for today… thirty years ago. Alcohol fueled a goofy idea that escalated at the speed of light, with Morita saying they were going to a wedding because they deserved a celebration, Dernier confessing that he had once considered becoming a priest, and Dum-dum bringing out all the old fashioned clothes from the wardrobe and deciding they were getting nice and clean for the festivities.

“That’s clearly Dernier in the picture killing it in his priest role, right?” Bucky says, half smiling and interrupting Steve’s thoughts. “You know, I went all-in with that fake wedding party. I was laughing to tears when I saw you put on that ridiculously long and ill-fitting jacket from the 10s, feeling weightless and silly for the first time since sailing off, and God knows we all deserved that. And it was all safe and light-hearted until fucking Morita decided you had to be the groom, and...”

“Were you jealous because I won the dashing groom competition?”

Steve’s attempt at a joke is weak, but there’s truth behind it: Morita chose Steve as the groom (“Cap, you are the most dashing and the least drunk”) to a chorus of excited voices cheering for him. Somebody else, most likely Dum-Dum, chose the rest of the roles (Sarge, best man duty; Jones, camera; Morita, keep the wine flowing; the rest of you, misbehave!) and in the blink of an eye, they were all going outside laughing under a light rain, and about to celebrate Steve’s fictional wedding to nobody.

“How could I be jealous?” Bucky cuts in. “Do you remember all you said to me that afternoon? During World War II and in front of a battalion of men?”

“I was drunk.”

“Fuck you!” Bucky disentangles his hand from Steve’s to use both of them to hold Steve’s face and kiss him with violence. “Tell me. Do you remember what you said?”

As if he could ever forget. He can recall every step he took from the house to the makeshift wedding spot amidst the trees where his best man (looking dapper even in that ludicrous jacket) was laughing along Dernier. He can still smell the petrichor, can still sense the blush coloring his cheeks while hoping nobody noticed and can still hear the beating of his heart when Bucky handed him a battered umbrella (“You don’t deserve to get rained on your wedding day, punk”) and a fucking ring made out his shoelaces (“You’ll have to buy something a little more permanent.”). And then…

“Dernier started the ceremony and he wanted to know if I had somebody in mind and I said ‘of course’.” He replays, his voice barely a whisper. “I said I’d had my eyes on a brown-haired Brooklynite since before I could remember. I said that I was pretty sure those blue eyes were set on mine too and that hopefully those eyes would be set enough to want to marry me even if I had never dared to ask.”

He’s been holding Bucky’s gaze the whole time, and he’s far from over yet, but he needs to fucking breathe before he goes on. Neither of them has moved a muscle for the past minute.

“Then he asked me to repeat the wedding vows after him and…”

“And you said Buck, right?”, Bucky interrupts, voice winded. “You fucking whispered I take you, Buck, as my lawful wedded husband till the end of the line. I heard, Steve. Even if the rest of the world didn’t, I did. But you never said anything, so I always deemed it impossible, a product of the corniest nook of my mind trying to outweigh all those bad things, because not even you could be as bold, reckless, and mushy as to do that,…it’s my fucking fault, I should have known better!”

“Not completely reckless, pal. I was scared shitless as I said those words, but what else could I do? You were right by my side about to put a ring on my finger as my “best man”, everyone, including you, supposedly drunk past recollection, and everybody else too far away to hear my whispers. It was such an easy choice in the end because truth should always win over fear. And those vows were. The truth.”

“You have always been too honest for your own good, Rogers,” Bucky is breathless and exasperated and goes for his mouth again, bringing in all he (they) couldn’t in 1944. “You destroyed me, Steve. My knees were as weak as a teenager’s in front of his first crush. I wanted to kiss you so badly when I heard you say all that there in the open… and I couldn’t even acknowledge it.”

“I know. And for what it's worth, I really thought you didn’t remember.”

It is too much. Is it normal to feel this much? Steve would blame it on the serum enhancements, but he was already overwhelmed at 16, so that’s clearly not the answer.

He craves, no, he needs touching, grounding, closer. Bucky. There’s too much space between them even if they are back to kissing like they would have that day in 44, and at any other time if their own lives wouldn’t have stolen those moments from them.

“It happened.” Bucky whimpers, biting on Steve’s lip who abandons his own stool to straddle him, both of them gasping in sync at the feeling of their cocks, hard against each other’s through their soft pants.

Bucky soon ups the stakes by carding his metal hand through Steve’s hair pulling his head backwards to help himself into that spot on his neck.

“Same two moles as when you were tiny, as when we were at that war... Your cute vampire bite. Favorite spot.” He licks on them with the tip of his tongue. Steve growls on cue and Bucky giggles. “Favorite chain reaction.”

“Buck, you cheater, you know what that does to me!” Steve cries out followed by Bucky’s evil chuckle.”Bed, couch, countertop,…I don’t care, but naked. Now. Stained pants due to heavy petting are too much of a trip down memory lane for me. Let me keep a bit of my dignity.”

Steve stands up liberating Bucky from his grip but aching at the loss of contact.

They are naked and making out in the middle of the kitchen in no time; Bucky steadily pushing him against the refrigerator while fiercely grinding against his crotch.

“Hey, ‘teve,” Bucky pants. “The way this is going, it’s my dignity now that's at risk. I don’t think I can make it further than the floor before I come.”

Steve groans into his mouth just at the thought and they start sliding to the floor the best they can until he’s a human blanket moving over Bucky. With no lube at hand, and no time, that’s their best option.

They kiss and kiss and kiss, his hands not leaving Bucky’s sweaty hair. Bucky’s hands on his ass, forcing their groins closer with one while he (almost absently) plays around his hole with the other, driving Steve crazy in the process. Dicks left to do their own thing through pressure and friction. Everything is working. And fast.

“Oh, fuck!” Bucky exclaims “Can you promise me all this stuff with the letter was real and not a long-con plan to assure your fragile masculinity that I love you more than I love that espresso machine?”

That. That silly unfunny excuse of a joke that screams Bucky all over is what pushes Steve all the way over the edge. He fucking laughs as he comes making absolutely embarrassing sounds, pressing their foreheads and noses together until it hurts, and shaking from head to toe without stoping his pressure on the stupid and smug man under him. His lover. His partner. His unofficial husband. His best friend.

His Buck.

“There’s still too much blood in your brain if you can play that dirty,” Steve states, placing one hand between them grabbing Bucky’s hard cock. “Let’s see if I can do anything about it.”

“Your hand, usually so helpful, but I was already following you after that sound you make when you come and laugh at the same time, shit, it always goes straight to my dick, I’m,…” he keeps talking with difficulty between breaths and moans until he leaves his speech unfinished coming all over Steve’s fist.

They kiss on the lips breathing into each other before Steve rolls over. They are sticky and panting in silence, spread on their kitchen’s floor, Steve’s shoulders crushed between Bucky’s and the dishwasher. Domestic bliss at its most literal.

One lavish fuck and two showers later they reemerge into the kitchen in search of something to eat: Bucky is in charge of the food today, while Steve cleans the mess they left a couple of hours ago.

He’s decluttering the counter when their damaged picture laying there puts a smile on his face but also reminds him of the restored version presumably still waiting inside the disregarded letter, so he grabs the envelope to retrieve its contents: one photocopy (from Dernier’s original writing), and the promised photo.

And it is restored. Everything is clear where it was blurry before: Dernier (so deep into his priest impersonation that he’s not even looking at them), the trees, the battered umbrella, the ridiculous jackets… and them.

“You had the nerve to call me reckless and mushy, Buck?” Steve laughs as he stares at the picture where a very young Bucky is about to put a ring on his finger with the least subtle lovestruck expression he’s ever seen (“and it’s for you”, his brain proudly reminds him) “Wow, you might as well be kissing me there, anything would be more subtle than this!”

“Don’t shame me, you punk, especially not when you were the one responsible for breaking my brain back then!” Bucky answers coming from behind and stealing the picture from his hands to scrutinize it. Goofy grin and raging blush quickly taking over his face. “But you’re one to talk, Cap. You are gazing at that shoelace’s ring as if I were handing you a diamond tiara!”

Steve laughs softly at that and moves his right hand to his pocket, feeling the weight of the little compass he had retrieved earlier from one of his drawers. He used to carry it with him everywhere for comfort, but he has a better option now.

“Didn't you know that shoelaces are forever?” He asks, taking the compass out of his pocket and holding it in both hands as he opens it, nudging Bucky with his elbow to get his attention.

Bucky is confused for an instant while he looks at his young face staring at them from inside the little box. Of course he knew that (he made fun of Steve for days and days) but Steve detects the change in his expression when he notices the other thing.

“Wow, you gigantic sap,” Bucky says, taking the compass out of his hands to double-check he is seeing what he thinks he’s seeing. “You saved my shoelace.”

He had. While they were all celebrating his wedding under the rain dancing to no music, he quietly slipped the little string off his finger and tied it to the most secure place he had back then.

“It’s not a shoelace, you jerk, it’s a symbol. A declaration.” He laughs, stealing the compass back to safely pocket it again.

“You are delusional,” Bucky snorts, kissing the top of his head. But he’s widely smiling and lost in thought as he goes back to their sandwiches.

Steve stays on the spot enjoying the peace in their silent companionship, his focus on the latest news showing up on his phone, the text he’s writing to Sam and the comforting sounds of Bucky moving around the kitchen.

“You might have married me, but I never actually married you.” Bucky blurts out of the blue a bit later, sitting by his side as he hands him a plate with a sandwich and some grilled greens on it. “Do you want mayo with that?”

“Uh?” Steve forgets all about the news and the text and looks at Bucky in confusion.

“Mayo, do you want some?” Bucky repeats nonchalantly.

“No mayo, thank you; but I was actually more interested in the other part, you know, that thing about marriage?”

Bucky looks him in the eye: earnest, blushing and with the same look of smug adoration he had on the picture.

“Oh, that part.” He jokes. “You apparently married me in 1944, but I never married you back. And I would like to.”

“Marry me?” Steve asks and Bucky visibly nods.

“I’m sorry for throwing the idea at you like this, books tell me I'm supposed to have candles, music, and a ring, but you showed me that restored picture and I couldn't stop thinking about it, about proof,” Bucky speaks uncharacteristically slow and very softly, voice trembling here and there while he claps his hand with Steve’s finger by finger for reassurance and as a distraction. “A single photo had the power to transform a moment that existed just as a made-up happy place inside my mind into something tangible and real. Something that would be tangible and real for anybody getting a hold on it and looking at our stupid faces.”

“So stealthy,” Steve says, and they both laugh together.

“Proof, Steve. I was slicing tomatoes and thinking how there’s so much evidence, thousands of files! out there proving that all the stuff that fuels my nightmares were real, but nothing solid about this. Us.” Bucky stops for a moment collecting his thoughts, still smiling even with the heavy subject he just dropped into the mix. “Sorry, I believe I put more time into these sandwiches than into thinking this all the way through so I’m…”

“Take your time, we’ve gone from mayo to marriage to nightmares in five minutes so don’t worry, you have me hooked here.”

Steve makes Bucky laugh again as he intended, and he feels their calloused laced fingers immediately squeezing closer.

“It’s stupid because it doesn’t change anything for us but,.. I don’t fucking know, Steve, I think that picture has messed up with my mind! I instantly found comfort in the idea of people finding facts beyond the nightmares now or in the future. An easy to understand, universal and oversimplified proof of how much I loved you and how much I was loved in return.” Bucky takes a breath and stares at him sporting a million-watt smile. “Marrying you,… I would really love that. And for real this time.”

“Ok, Buck.” Steve instantly replies, eagerness winning over thoughtful and heartfelt declarations. He tightens the grip on their joined hands to drive them to his lips and seals the easiest answer he’s ever had to give.

And it's done!Sorry for the cavities, for going on with the fic when it should have ended and for ending it where it might have had to keep going. It was painful and fun. I'm free!

[lesbian-deadpool]

Take A Slice

Part Six: WARNING! BULLSHIT INSIDE!

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Words: 1,761

Warnings: Blackmail, a bit of angst??, some self hate, talks of drugs, aftermath of violence, talks of cheating.

Summary: It just keeps getting worse and worse.

A/N: Bold and italics = Text Messages.

Ko-Fi

(Not My GIF)

***

You were out of it. Completely and entirely, out of it.

The soft feeling of the red-heads plump, strawberry and sugar flavoured lips, pressing against the side of your neck. Her hand, trailing up your sides, pushing and pulling at your shirt. With Natasha humming against you gently, it vibrating into your throat, as she ground against your hips underneath her.

And yet.

Even with all that she was gifting you with, you still weren't able to focus on any of it.

"What's up with you?" Natasha asked, her red lipstick smudged, and probably all over your neck, too.

"Hmm?"

"You're out of it. What's running through that head of yours?"

"Oh." Shit. "It's nothing. Just a little distracted, is all."

"I see that." She took your jaw between her hands, soothingly rubbing her thumbs into your skin. As she gazed down at you with soft eyes. "Anything I can help with?"

God, she was too good to you. Too good for you.

And you had to bring this bullshit into her life. Sometimes you wished that you had never stepped foot in her class, that way this, could have all been avoided. And all because of those fucking texts you got, two weeks ago.

You had to tell her.

You had too.

"Nope." You shook your head.

You suck.

"You sure?" Natasha asked, a humoured smile overtaking her face, "You still having trouble spelling, 'Nietzsche'?"

"His name sucks, okay?!" you exclaimed, making laughter bellow out of Natasha.

You watched her with soft eyes, you adored her laugh. Adored her everything, really. Her hair, falling over her shoulders, the sun shining through the windows, causing the red strands to glow. Summer had just sprung, almost as if it came to chase the girl in your arms.

You were playing a dangerous game.

But, you knew that from the start.

Now, though? Now? It was more dangerous than before.

Because now you were falling for her.

And that was not going to lead to anything good.

Not with all that is happening.

"His name is hard to spell," Natasha agreed breathlessly, with a small nod.

Dread filled you when your phone suddenly buzzed beside you.

Remember what I said.

Natasha noticed the anxiety flood into you, she was worried about you, never seeing you like this. Staring at your phone with fear-filled eyes.

Lucky for you though, she was unable to read any of the messages that had been sent to you.

Nor the next one's that came through.

You know when and where.

Do. Not. Be. Late.

You inhaled sharply, eyes finally finding Natasha's worried ones when you spoke.

"I'm sorry. I have to go."

"What? Why?" she asked, having to move off of you before you ended up pushing her off of you.

"Y/N? Are you sure everything's alright?"

"Yeah, fine. Just-" Quick think of a lie! "-Wade reminded me about a test we both have tomorrow. And I haven't studied for it at all."

Natasha got up with a chuckle, moving to place her hands upon your chest.

"You have always been on top of your studies, haven't you?"

You shrugged, too busy pulling on your socks and shoes, whilst trying to locate your jacket. You were going to need it tonight when it was chilly.

"Hey," Natasha soothed, "Don't worry so much. Why don't you stay here? I'll help you study. I'll even reward you every time you get a question right."

You groaned internally.

Why did she have to go and say shit like that?

"I'm sorry, babe. I'd love that. I really would," you pressed as if to make her understand how much you were telling the truth, as you pulled her in by her hip, "But I promised Wade, we would study together. He's worse at this class than I am."

She laughed breathlessly.

"You two really are the dynamic duo, aren't you?"

It was quiet for a moment, as you moved away from her. Ready to head out of her apartment, when she continued.

"You could always bring him, too."

"What?!" You span around to face her.

"Obviously the "rewards" would be off the table, then. But I would love to meet your friends. At least your best friend. I want to be in your life like people in more normal relationship's do. As long as they keep the secret."

Why was she so fucking perfect.

"But Nat, you've already met Wade, remember?"

She licked her lips with a smile. Memories of that morning, and what lead up to it, flashing through her mind.

"Of course, I remember. I meant I would like to get to know him."

"God. You are perfect." You walked up to her, pulling her into a passionate, love-filled kiss. "I'll set something up later. He'll probably want to play some video games with you."

"Fine by me. I'll kick his ass."

"I'm sure you will, honey." With a peck on her forehead, you turned, grabbing your jacket, calling over your shoulder as you left, "I'll see you soon."

"Good luck."

She didn't know how much you needed it.

***

Rumlow.

That fucker.

He was the one doing all of this to you. Blackmailing you. Forcing you to pick up and drop off drugs, like a fucking mule.

And there wasn't even a reason you could think of as to why he was doing it. Other than "he could".

The only reason you found out was, thanks to the guy you were dropping the drugs off too, was really chatty. And wouldn't keep his mouth shut about anything. That, sadly, included every intimate detail about his sex life.

But at least now, you could put a face to the messages.

And somebody to confront.

"Why?"

""Why" what?" you ask back. Hissing as the alcohol-soaked cotton wool ball pressed against the cut on your lip.

The itch for a smoke rattled throughout your body, hands almost shaking in your state. But you had told Natasha that you would try and cut down smoking for her, and God damn if you were, unbeknown to her, bringing this shit into her life, you could at least do this for her.

"Why did you get into a fight with Rumlow?" Wade clarified.

You took the few moments he gave you as he reached into the first aid kit to think over your answer. You debated on whether or not you should tell him the truth. After all, you hadn't even told Natasha as of yet.

But you just couldn't keep it to yourself anymore.

"He's blackmailing me."

Wade dropped the haemorrhoid cream for your black eye onto the floor, his shocked face snapping to face yours, that was still void of emotion.

"What? What do you mean that bastard's blackmailing you? What with?!"

"I'm a fucking idiot," you hissed at yourself, tears springing into your eyes. Elbows resting on your knees, as your head came to lay in the palms of your hands, "It was my idea."

"What was?" He placed a hand upon your shoulder, stood before where you sat on the kitchen worktop.

"I filmed up having sex. Nat agreed to it. But fuck, if I hadn't of brought it up..."

"Hey! Don't do that," he told you firmly, "It's not your fault that someone is using your private life against you."

You didn't reply to him. Your jaw only ticking, as you shook your head. Still kicking yourself for it.

"Does she know?"

"No," your voice was raw as you thought about your girlfriend. Your perfect girlfriend. Who didn't deserve any of this.

"You need to tell her."

"I know... I just- I just wanted to sort it out, before I ever had too. But now, that's not gonna happen."

"Because you kicked his ass? You did kick his ass, right?"

You smiled, wincing at the pain your split lip caused you.

"Hell yeah, I did." Flinching slightly, as Wade began rubbing the cream onto your bruised eye. "But no. It's not because I kicked his ass. Although that might be part of it now... he was never gonna let it end. He just wanted me to be his lapdog for a while, then run me outta Dodge."

"Lapdog how?"

You shuck your head. "I was basically his drug mule."

"Y/N-"

"It was only hookie weed, but still. I'm sure he's into funkier stuff. He was talking about cocaine with someone on the phone when I confronted him."

"And yet, you didn't share with me," he joked. It was the only thing he really could do before he sighed sadly, "He wanted you out of town?"

You nod.

"Why?"

"No idea. He just yelled at me after our fight, that he wants me outa here. That's all her was blackmailing me for. But, my best guess is that he thought he could "get some use" out of me, before then.

"What are you gonna do?"

"I have no idea. I can't let Natasha lose her job over this shit, man. She loves teaching. Said that it was all she's ever wanted to do."

"Talk to her."

"Yeah, I will soon. I just- Is it so bad that I wanna live in denial, and just be happy with her, for a little while longer?"

"No." Wade shook his head. "You're just in love."

You hummed in agreement. You seriously couldn't believe how fast you fell for that woman.

"Since when did you become so wise?"

"I've always been wise, fuck you for not seeing it."

You were incredibly lucky to have a friend like Wade Wilson. You just hoped you didn't have to leave the people you cared about behind.

Only time would tell.

But first.

First, you had to talk to Natasha.

A small smile was pulled upon your face, while you watched your best friend and roommate walk away with the first aid kit, to return it to its place in the bathroom.

Then something you came to dread happened.

Your phone vibrated.

Pack your bags and move out of the fucking state. Or I post your precious video onto the school's website.

Homepage, baby!

Bet she'd look real good up there.

Maybe there will be a porn future for her after she gets fired.

This will teach you for fucking my girlfriend.

Well, shit.

***

Take A Slice Tag List: 

@wannabe-fic-writer​, @ohfuckno​, @uglipotata72829​

Permanent Tag List: 

@imnotasuperhero, @veteranwerewolf95, @natasha-danvers, @marvelfansince08love, @higherfurther-romanova, @lesbian-x-blackwidow, @sestra-inestro, @thelastavenger-3000

[clouditae]

First Love | 14

Yoongi x reader | 18+ | college au | tattoo artist au | angst | fluff | swearing

Word: 2.6k

You first saw him in the multi-purpose room. Later learn his name, and on your third year, as he becomes your neighbor, you discover his lifestyle. Knowing your crush on him was nothing but that, you wanted to find the courage to look for love. Asking your friend for help, you’re pointed in the direction of the expert. Your neighbor, Min Yoongi

Chapter Index

Ari never seemed as happy as she is right now after you just asked her to help you find the perfect outfit for today's date. She squealed and yelled about how happy she is for you to be going on a date with a “God” as she put it. 

“Do you want Hoseok to hear you?” you whisper, listening intently for your neighbor to come banging on your door.

“He’s still on campus,” she states as she opens her closet and digs through her line of clothes. “The only person that should be there is Dick Mcgee. Unless he's somewhere as well." She hands you a yellow sweater, moving to your closet to dig through it for something else. Even though her eyes are on the inside of your closet, it seems as though she senses your confusion with the top she hands you. "That's a laguna yellow."

"You seem to know your colors," you mutter, grabbing a pair of light blue jeans from her.

"Should have majored in fashion," she sighs before gesturing to the bathroom behind you. After a quick change you're seated at her desk and given "the second biggest makeover of a lifetime." You really don't know what that means, but you're not going to say anything. It's probably just best to let her do her thing so that she doesn't mess your make-up up because you somehow offended her. Ari talks the entire process--mainly about how she imagines your date going today. The two of you are going to talk about everything while walking down the sidewalk at the park brushing the back of your hand against each other. The two of you are too shy to say anything about it, but after a few more brushes, he gathers the courage to take your hand in his. Your hand fits perfectly into his like any romantic situation. There's blushing and no eye contact.

You want that. You want all of that. To feel loved and to have all those feelings you felt for Yoongi, but to have someone feel the same way for you. "I'm scared," you whisper, eyes closed as you feel the brush run along your lids.

There's a pause in her movements. It's silent for a few seconds before she speaks, "Why?"

You open your eyes, meeting her gaze as you answer, "I've never had anyone tell me they like me before. I know it sounds stupid, but I'm just scared of all that is going to come after this date. What if he doesn't like me after this? What if I'm only meant to just like someone and that's it?"

Ari cups your cheeks, squishing your face. "It's okay to be scared, Y/N. You're new to the whole dating thing, and if he doesn't have feelings for you after this then he wasn't the one. It'll suck because you like him, but your future husband will pop up soon." Ari goes back to work on your eye shadow, your eyes closing. "So don't worry about it, Y/N." When Ari is done with everything, she can't help herself and begins to take pictures for whatever app she's using. "I wanna show you off." 

Your phone chimes and you both freeze. Grabbing your phone off from your bed you open the text.

[2:48 pm] Hanbin: Hey! I'm outside the dorms :)

"He's here," you tell her, clearly nervous all over again.

Ari claps her hands in excitement. "I'm so excited, and my first date was years ago." She grabs your bag and hands it to you as she rushes you out the door like she did a few days ago. "Tell me everything when you come back. I'll make sure I'm not with Hoseok or anything!"

Saying your goodbyes, you let out a deep breath and make your way down the hall. Every step is slow and drag-like. You're so nervous you feel like you're going to throw up. What you didn't expect, however, is when you step outside and make your way down the steps to see him standing at the end, all that fear leaves. You aren't scared, but excited. Happy.

"Hey," he says, smiling his perfectly crooked smile.

"Hi."

He sticks his arm out towards you. "Ready to go?"

You smile, looping your arm through his. "Let's go." He leads you towards the parking lot, passing a few parked cars before going in between two red vehicles. He opens the passenger door to your right, acting gentlemanly. You laugh, "Thank you." You get in the car as he closes the door and makes his way around. "Okay, Y/N. You got this. You got this." He opens the door. "Where are we headed?"

He shakes his head. "That's a secret," he answers. "I'm only hoping you'll like it." Turning the ignition, his car comes to life and he puts it in reverse and backs out the spot. "If not," he begins, putting the car in drive, "I should have just taken you out to dinner." The drive is silent at first, but once you bring up midterms, the conversation goes. "We're almost there," he tells you after a while of talking, pointing to the glove compartment. "There's an eye mask in there. Can you put that on?"

You open the compartment. "An eye mask?"

"Cheesy I know, but Ari said you love this place and I thought doing this would make it ten times better."

"Okay," you say, a bit reluctant as you put the mask on. You sit in silence, hands on your lap as you feel the car take a turn. You don't know how long it was, but you guess around five minutes before the car comes to a stop.

Hanbin turns off the engine and tells you, "Don't remove them just yet." The door opens and you hear a weird roaring sound. Where are you? A few seconds later your door opens. "Give me your hand?" You unbuckle your seatbelt, sticking your hand out and feel his grab yours. He helps you out of the car, placing your bag in your hand for you to drape around your shoulder. "Do you know where we are?" he questions.

You shake your head. "It's hard to tell." There's a sound of people screaming. "Where are we?"

"Not yet." He guides you, your hand wrapped in his as you walk for a while, every now and then him telling you that something is coming up. The roaring and screaming is louder now. You think you know where you are, but you could be wrong. A few steps later he finally stops and says, "Okay. You can take them off."

Reaching for the strap on the mask, you pull it off, blinking to adjust to the sunlight. When your vision is clear, you look up and see the huge, familiar sign. Dragons Throne can be read in big red and bold letters. A green dragon with its mouth open and fire coming from it twists its body around the T.

You look to Hanbin. "You brought me to Dragons Throne?"

He looks a little dejected as he replies, "Ari said you love this place so I thought it would be a great first date, but I guess I was wrong—"

"No, no," you cut him off, shaking your head and hands. "I love this place. I was just surprised that we would be here," you laugh nervously. "I've never been on a date, so from all the romantic movies I've seen, first dates are usually dinner and a movie."

He nods in understanding. "Hopefully this will be better than dinner and a movie." He holds out his hand towards you. "Shall we have fun?"

You hesitantly reach for his outstretched hand, taking in that this could be something. You could finally have that happy ending you've been waiting for. You didn't realize the first time how big his hands were compared to yours. It’s like yours disappears when you hold hands. After a few minutes of waiting in line to get past the entrance gate, you are now giddy with excitement. It's been a while since you came here, and even though you've been on all the rides, you still can't help but feel like you're about to ride them for the first time.

"Where should we go first?" he asks you, looking down to meet your gaze.

The Big Drop? Slasher? What ride should his first experience be? "Let's start from this side and work our way around," you negotiate, pointing to the right and sweeping your arm around until it stops to your left side.

He chuckles, "Deal." You lead him towards the first roller coaster with excitement as you get in the short line. "It said the wait will be fifteen minutes," Hanbin begins, leaning against the railing, "I'm thinking we can play a game in the meantime."

You look at him with an inquisitive gaze. "What kind of game?"

"Well we've talked a lot, so we know a few things about one another. Let's quiz each other and see who has a better memory."

"What does the winner get?" you catechize, leaning against the railing across from him.

He taps his chin in thought. After a few seconds of thinking he answers, "The winner gets a prize from the stands here."

"Deal."

Hanbin grins. "I'll start and it'll be an easy one. What's my favorite color?"

"Orange." He nods. "What's mine?" you ask.

"Gray. What's my mom's name?"

So he plans to go further than what you expected. You thought maybe it’s simple questions like his major, favorites and so on. You weren't expecting questions that involve family members, or most likely questions about his childhood. But you have a good memory so you know basically everything he told you. "Mindy."

It seems like both of you are competitive with how hard the questions are getting. You both want to win and be known as the person who knows the other best, but it seems like it'll be a tie. It doesn't stop after the first ride. No. Each wait the questions continue and it surprises you how much you two talk within two weeks. As the hours go by you become more comfortable around him. You don't wait for him to take your hand, you just go for it like you've been doing it for years.

After the two of you have ridden half the rides here, Hanbin suggests, "How about we get something to eat?"

"Sure. What are you in the mood for?"

"What are you in the mood for?"

You begin to think of all the restaurants and stands that are scattered around the park. What could he be in the mood for? Fish or meat? Maybe just fries and a corn dog? Your mom always boasted about the turkey legs they have at the park in your hometown. "Well we can go to the food court area and we can figure out what we want," you suggest.

"Sounds good." He smiles, letting you lead the way once again. You pass by a few characters taking pictures with kids and adults before you reach the main area where a majority of the food stands and restaurants reside. Walking past the stone arch, your eyes immediately drift to the nacho stand. It's not like there isn’t a variety of good options, but since you first tried their nachos here, you can't help but get them every time you came here.

"I see nachos," Hanbin comments and your eyes dart to him. Is he your soulmate? He looks at you. "What are you getting?"

"Nachos."

He grins. "Great minds think alike." There is no one in the nacho line so you order and receive your food quickly. Taking a seat at an empty table, you and Hanbin dig in. Comparing your plate to Hanbin's you realize you are as simple as it gets. Just jalapenos and that's it. Hanbin, on the other hand, has jalapenos, onions, sour cream—the whole works. "Want some?" he offers. You quickly shake your head. He laughs, "Not a fan?"

"Onions." Hanbin can only laugh even harder.

The rest of the day is all a fun blur. Your hands never let one another's go for a majority of the time. Taking breaks you’re snuggled close together. You take photos together and you send them to Ari. He even won you a prize even though you lost by one question. To you it feels like a date that you only see on extremely romantic movies. Like a princess going on a date for the first time with the prince she eventually falls in love with.

After a long day, and basically staying until closing, you and Hanbin get out of his car in the dorm parking lot. In one hand you have a light pink bear and in the other Hanbin holds yours lightly, fingers laced. People are hanging out on the sidewalk chatting away dressed for going out as you two pass them and head up the stairs. You’re ready to fish out your ID to open the door, but another group of people opened the door to leave. The hall is loud; full of chatting people, loud music and even a few doors open where you can see figures dancing.

"So this is what it's like to dorm," Hanbin chuckles, continuing to lead you down the hall, past the stairway and into your hall. Reaching your dorm door he stops and turns to look at you. He smiles warmly, his thumb brushing along your skin. "I had fun," he tells you.

"Me too," you confess, heart fluttering as you grip the bear tighter. "Thank you."

He shakes his head. "I'm hoping there's another one sometime soon."

"I'd love that. Maybe after midterms?" you suggest. Just enough time to do a date or two more before break.

"Yeah," he begins, staring at you with such a warm gaze you feel your cheeks warming, "I guess it's time to say bye."

You didn't want to. "Yeah."

A few seconds of silence. "Can I kiss you?" he whispers. It’s like the hairs on the back of your neck stand. No words are leaving your mouth, so you nod. Hanbin leans in slow. As if he is still making sure you want this. He gets closer and closer until his lips touch yours. It is everything you ever imagined. His lips are soft and he kisses you slow and with so much care. You're only falling for him even more. When he moves back, he presses his forehead against yours. "Night, Y/N."

"Night," you breathe. With one last kiss you watch him leave.

You can't help but grin as you pull out your key and enter the room. You're not even mad that Ari isn't here. You're so happy that nothing can break you. You place the bear on your bed, put your bag on the floor, grab your pj's and take a quick shower. After your shower, you climb into bed, lie on your side and snuggle with the bear. You close your eyes and imagine the whole date over again.

In the silence of sheer bliss a soft rhythmic sound can be heard. It is a small tapping sound, but it grew louder and louder as well as the sound of a girl moaning. It hits you. It's like the beginning of the semester all over again, but it's different today. You have Hanbin. You have someone who likes you and wants to go on another date with you. He's not Yoongi. He's better.

So why are you crying yourself to sleep for the second time because of him?  

[savagenutella46]

And Thus With A Kiss I Die

Jasonette 1/1 - A fic I wrote for @moonlitceleste because she’s amazing

All quotes/title in bold italics derived from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet.

"Banishèd' is banished from the world, and world's exile is death."

There's no finite end to where white and black meet. Everything is shades of grey; infinite on a foreboding scale of fate and destiny: entities that push you to make the choices you do.

It had ended with a flash of light—real or her imagination, she had witnessed it between her own eyes. The kind of flashing light that tells you, "you've died."

Ladybug could still hear the shrieks and screams of civilians echoing ringingly around her, confused, scared, as to why an akumatized villain was hurting them the way that it was; this wasn't how akumatizations usually went, maybe a few scratches, worn out knees, but never this.

(—And to think, it had started out as a normal day.

Marinette rose out of bed with the same grogginess lingering at the corner of her eyes, brushed her teeth, kissed her Maman on the cheek as she ran to school, late.

You'd never suspect you were going to die on a day so normal, so domestic.)

What had this person been through before submitting to Hawkmoth with such a vicinity? How had Hawkmoth prayed to a cacophony of emotions like this—to kill, order, destroy everything in its path? Marinette would never catch an inkling, dying and all that jazz.

It's easy to see the world through a rose-colored lens. To believe that people do the things they do because they're bad. (but no one ever talks about why they do the things they do because they're good.)

And Marinette, masked in all her red-and-black glory, had pushed a frozen-with-fear civilian out of harm's way, an absurd amount of unleashed dark magic from the akuma hurtling its way toward them, and she'd taken the hit. Rolled on the ground for yards from the sheer force that the akuma's magic had flew and stricken her and pierced the skin, blood splattering and trailing as she slapped and hit the street from every possible angle.

Ladybug can't move, can't call for help when she desperately needs to, because her partner is miles away trying to fight what has her plastered to the ground, laying limp underneath her dead weight, breathing muffled and heavy underneath her physical detriment.

Ladybug's eyes droop under the weight of exhaustion, barely running on fumes before she had run out in an attempt to defeat what was supposed to be an everyday activity.—Crazy, how something can seem so domestic until its so, so much more.—A hemothorax forming in her chest where Marinette had been hit, a very open thoracic cavity filling up with blood, and she's spluttering for breath, because her throat is closed up, filled with blood from where the akuma hit her to where it burned.

It burns real bad, almost like an explosion stemming from her chest to the nerve endings on her toes. Marinette feels like she's being tortured with every meek twitch of her wrist as she lays on the ground, unable to see over the car shouldering her path, the pain burning behind her eyes, the white-hot disappointment in her heart.

—And she knows it's time. Because this is the work of fate. Her life in its hands. It had seemed miles away from Marinette just this morning, and how she wished she could go back and cherish the moments since she'd arisen from unpremeditated slumber.

She cannot. This is her destiny, as it seems. No one can be saved if Ladybug cannot save herself, can't will herself to detransform and heal herself because she can't, and she feels a gripping amount of remorse before emotions hit her all around—she should've told Adrien something, she can't recall what it is—should've told her Maman she loved her before running out the door in such a rush—should've squealed about the hot superheroes in America with Alya one last time, before she feels nothing.

Nothing except for the white light. And then dark again. Absolutely nothing.

                                               _________________

It's dark when she opens her eyes, and she blinks to make sure her eyes are actually open, and sees a big, fat, load of nothing.

Marinette's—the ladybug suit had disappeared, her normal clothes taking its place—body feels light, floaty, and utterly weightless against the dark mass she's standing atop of. Her head feels eerily light, calm without the weight of the world on her shoulders, and a calm feeling washes over her.

Her voice echoes against endless sound barriers as she utters her first words since death.

"This is what death feels like, huh?" Utterly amazing. Marinette can't believe she didn't do this earlier.

—But, for a moment, she feels empathy. Empathy for the people stuck in Paris, wondering if this was the day they were going to die, the people all around the world living in fear of something so inevitable.

She closes her eyes for just a second, a moment of vengeful peace. Opens them again, and this time, she's somewhere different.

She's in a library. Unfamiliar, but welcoming all the same. The smell of crisp, unopened books float idly in her senses, a synthetic warm feeling creeping up behind her back. Distantly, she realizes that she recognizes the place, tables placed and shelves abundantly filled with books, ranging from science fiction to classic literature, and it feels exactly how it did all those years ago.

Years ago, when she'd first visited the United States of America, the first place her Maman and Papa took her was a public library in Gotham City, New Jersey. It had welcomed her so openly that she couldn't help but smile a little, slip under from her parent's grasp, and wander toward a vast section of William Shakespeare, someone she'd heard so much about in her eight—nine years, she couldn't help but be pulled toward the ordain shelf.

She'd even met someone, too. Her mother would forever deny—if Marinette had still been alive, but Marinette was convinced the little boy sitting against the mass of wooden shelves had been very, very real. Marinette had smiled at him, sat down next to him, even if he gave her a wary, and borderline aggressive look, she'd introduced herself.

"Hi, I'm Marinette." She'd said with a horrible stutter and an almost unintelligible accent. The boy closed his book—a black and white cover with words she couldn't quite understand the meaning of as well as a simple name like Shakespeare's, and she smiled a little harder.

"Jason," He'd said in a heedful voice, staring at her curiously. "Whadda' you want?"

Marinette shrugged as best she could with weak shoulders, and turned her head from the person next to her to drink in every corner of the library that she could see without moving from her increasingly-uncomfortable crouch on the ground.

"Nothing. Just wanted to see what you're reading." She leaned over his shoulder, monosyllabic and complex English text alike filling her view, so many words that blurred together, and she felt a heat at the top of her head in frustration.

She couldn't read English.

The boy next to her—Jason, had seemed to recognize her distress and pull the book closer to him, floundering for a moment before he exhaled loudly, and started to read.

Words flowed out of the him, smooth and languid, and she found herself trapped in the moment, mesmerized by such an eloquent reading from a boy who looked just her age.

"What cursèd foot wanders this way tonight to cross my obsequies and true love's rite?" He reads off, breaking unevenly for gulps of air, and dove back right where he stopped without much distraction, and moments, minutes passed under his voice.

And the memory fell away from view. She opened eyes she didn't realize had closed when a voice seemed to float from the corner of her vision, a body stepping into view and a realized this wasn't imagination.

Another boy, dressed in tattered—but comfortable looking jeans finds his way over to her, a curious glint in his magnificent blue eye and a raised eyebrow, though he looks troubled, aged where he ought to look youthful.

"Who're you?" He mumbles, lips barely moving around syllables as he stares at Marinette, defensive, yet hopeful.

His voice. Despite the clearly street-wise accent, his voice is beautiful. A voice that could recite hundreds of words and never get old in the canals of her ears. Marinette found herself wanting to hear more.

"Marinette." She blinks, seems to realize the way he seems nervous, and, "You like jazz?" Blurts out the first thing that comes to mind, which, just so happens to be the only sentence capable of such utterance in damning—literally—times like this one.

Jason finally cracks a smile after a few more moments of cricket-inducing silence, and the newfound tension in her shoulders seems to melt away again, just as it did with her entrance to a magnificent limbo such as this. "Not in particular, but I do like to read." His smile is utterly contagious, and Marinette feels it spread its way along her own face, eyes crinkling under the weight of emotion.

They spend their days in an endless limbo like that, reading, laughing, sometimes in the comfortable chair in the library, and sometimes they're gazing upon clouds, feeling the prickly sensation of grass under their backs as they lie next to one another under a cool breeze and warm sun—which is the scene they're settling in, when Marinette turns her head toward the boy next to her.

"It's been," She pauses for a moment, adding up the days since they've both died—it had to be around the same time—and Jason turns his head toward her in a similar fashion, an eyebrow raised. "A few months? And..." She trails off, suddenly feeling less confident in a horrid question.

She knows the way she had died hadn't been peaceful, and if the boy she'd grown so close to in months of passing had died as painfully, he might doubt their budding friendship, as new as it is.

But then Jason reaches over and covers her hand with his, a blooming warmth enveloping her hand all the way to her heart, her vision snaps back to where it had wandered down to the rest of her body, reliving a turret of emotions. "Marinette," Jason stares at her in earnest, "You can ask."

Another thing she'd never understand was Jason's ability to read people so well. He'd always know her intentions, as bad or good as they may be, like something mundane, a book she'd eyed for a few minutes before he'd sighed heavily and got up to get it for her, or when Marinette wanted to be left alone. Just for a minute, to pull herself back together.

"How did you die?" She watches as Jason closes his eyes, curling in on himself despite the foretold question, and waits.

She's good at waiting. (A familiar feeling of heat creeping up to her cheeks, the same way it did with someone else, not so long ago, but in a different lifetime.)

"It started out when I tried to steal Batman's tires—" Marinette widens her eyes in surprise.

Oh, so they're going way back then, huh?

But by the time Jason finishes speaking, pats his sweaty hands down on the slacks he wore that day that came from God knows where, Marinette finds the humor and her mood had dimmed significantly.

And Jason, he looks terrible. Like it was the first time he'd said something about it since, well, death. Almost hyperventilating, Jason is breathing heavily, gripping onto his pants with malice and intent, almost as if stopping himself from something. He'd told his beginning to end with an increasingly shaky voice, cracking at the edges where he'd relived the fear and abandonment he felt when trapped in an unfamiliar country, in a dirty warehouse, trapped in his own feelings in a suit that he thought would always protect him.

Without a dad that he'd thought would always protect him.  

Marinette feels a little sick. The boy next to her had died so brutally, alone, scared and slowly.

"I don't regret it. Being Robin." He adds quietly after a moment of hesitation. It's small, but it's there and plain. He doesn't regret something that changed his life, but— "Just the death part."

He would want to change his death, and she couldn't agree more.

If only it meant they could've still met despite living, that is.

She doesn't say that. Instead, she laughs a little. "You and me both." Marinette reaches over to hold his hand once more, and pretends not to see the tears climbing out of his eyes.

"So early waking, what with loathsome smells, and shrieks like mandrakes torn out of the earth, that living mortals, hearing them, run mad—?"

How it felt to tear his way out of the ground, shivering, shaking, flinching at the way his fingernails tore away with every claw and scratch at the unyielding wood before him. Jason was vaguely aware of a horrible groaning noise that might've been his own, but when his hand stuck through to crisp Gotham air, dirt flinging and spilling down on his face as he gasped and choked for breath, he could only think of a single quote from such a cliche play.

He thought of it while tearing out the bloody uvula of his victim, spurred on by the Pit and Talia's ruthless training, starving for the sound of screaming that rung in his ear, continued to clang loudly even in sleep, when it bestowed itself upon him.

Because he couldn't think about anything else. Wouldn't allow himself to, because then he would start thinking about her.

About how she left him.

Jason had turned to retrieve a book from their peaceful library limbo one day, muttering to himself about something so mundane that he didn't even remember, but he'd grabbed the book—a simple fiction, because they were both bored of astronomy—and turned around to silence, instead of the shiny mop of dark hair he was expecting.

"Marinette?" Jason calls, swiveling his head around when the chair previously occupied by her stood empty.

Jason waits.

He doesn't know how long he waits, searches, but she isn't there.

And the feeling of disappointment and fear runs up his spine again, before he knows it, he's kneeling on the ground, trying to catch his breath as tears run down because he's been abandoned again, and it's just as damning as the first time.

His father, his brother, his mother, his birth mother, and now his friend.

Jason breaks down again, gripping harshly onto his hair while he cries, where he'd usually hold onto Marinette's hand.

So he doesn't think of much at all, really. Not when he turns on murder mode, not when he forces himself to stare into the eyes of the person he's killing while they die, because he wants to remember how it felt. How it felt before he met another superhero torn away from her life almost as harshly as he was ripped away from his own.

He wants to go back. Before he flew to Ethiopia unsupervised and unprepared, before he took the Robin mantle, before he decided to make quick cash off of the Batmobile, before his mother died by her own hands, loosely holding a syringe and shaking, shuddering from her overdose.

Jason wants to go back to Before. He can't stand living in the After, where he makes the choices he does.

He’s supposed to be good.

permanent taglist: @nathleigh @stainedglassm @officiallydarkgeek @certainmuffinbagelcalzone @buterflies-and-ladybugs @maskedpainter

[shewillreadyou]

Me before You: Chapter 2- For Real

As always. I hope that you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

A/N: This is a TRR AU. Liam is already married, but see’s Riley and wants his cake. If the readers are receptive this might turn into more than a mini series.

Disclaimers: Most characters are property of Pixelberry

Warnings: Language, adult content, mild sexual innuendo. 

Word Count: 2458

Catch up: Haven’t met you Yet

Prompts: @theworldofprompts​ 

“Name one thing you regret in life?”  

“Well, for starters, I married you.” will appear in BOLD.

Pairings: Drake & Riley

Song inspiration: For Real- Amel Larrieux

Be Kind: Hit the heart button, leave a comment or reblog. It makes a writer so so happy. 

“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may salute your bride.”

Savannah and her groom shared a modest kiss. 

“It is my pleasure to present to you for the very first time the Duke and Duchess of Ramsford. Bertrand and Savannah Beaumont of Cordonia.”

“Cordonia?” Riley whispered to herself.

“So I’m not crazy. Drake said he is from Cordonia. The Liam look-alike could really be King Liam of Cordonia. The matron of honor could actually be Queen Carsyn. This is insane.” 

Her thoughts raced as she tried to make connections. 

“There will be a cocktail hour in the barn,” an older woman announced.

The barn was decorated in a rustic theme, Tim McGraw’s, “I like it, I love it” played in the background and there were servers with appetizers everywhere. Quickly, lines formed for the open bars. Mack held on to Riley’s arm as they waited.

“So let me get this straight? The guy you met in New York, was Drake? Drake Walker? Like Savannah’s brother Drake? No fucking way. The world is not that small.”

“Yeah, apparently it is, he is the man I saw at the airport, the guy from the bar, the guy I’ve been texting and now he’s here.”

“Sounds like fate.”

“I don’t know if I believe in fate. More like dumb luck.”

“Miss Riley?” a server interrupts their conversation. 

“For you and your guest.”

He offers a whiskey sour and an old fashion, the signature drink to she and Mack.

“Compliments of Mr. Walker. My name is Caleb, I have been personally assigned to you for the duration of the evening. You don’t need to wait in lines. I can bring you whatever you need to eat or drink.”

“Wow, well thank you Caleb. That’s very thoughtful.” 

She tries to tip Caleb and he refuses. 

“No thank you Ma’am. Mr. Walker has already compensated me handsomely. Please let me know if there is anything else I can get for you.”

Later

The wedding party joins the guests in the barn before the bride and groom have their first dance. Riley watched from her assigned seat wondering who would end up seated next to her. The seat went empty for the first part of the afternoon. 

“That was a beautiful ceremony. You know, I have seen pictures and heard tons of stories about Drake from Savannah, but he has really grown up. He is a hottie.”

“He’s ok.”

“Wow, just ok? Huh? I’m wounded.” he says in a raspy voice. 

“Drake!”

Mack and Riley blush furiously.

“Raye. It’s good to see you again.”

“That’s one way of putting it,” she smirked.

“Sorry! Drake, this is Mackenzie, Mack this is Savannah’s brother Drake.”  

“Don’t listen to her. She was definitely pleasantly surprised,” Mack said as she extended her hand for Drake to kiss. 

Riley elbowed Mack and Drake laughed as he shook her hand. 

“Good thing I get the honor of keeping you company tonight. My seat was moved next to yours.”

He smiled and Riley’s heart melted just a little bit more. He leaned over to hug her and she immediately flashed back to their dance on the rooftop. 

After their first dance, all the guests were invited to the dance floor. “At Last” by Etta James started to play.

“May I have this dance? And please don’t tell me that your feet still hurt.”

She stood, unsure of what to do in the presence of royalty.

“Your Majesty, we have to stop meeting this way. Shouldn’t you be dancing with your Queen?”

Before he could answer, Drake slipped up behind Riley snaking his strong arm around her waist. Pulling her into his embrace.

“Beat it Li!”

“Miss me yet?” 

“Perfect timing. Small world. You didn’t say that your Mom and sister lived so close to me.”

“I didn’t think it was pertinent information at the time,” he said as he led her in a slow dance. Riley watched Queen Carsyn over Drakes shoulder, as she shot daggers at King Liam. 

“Is he always like that?”

“What?”

“Liam? Is he always so tactless?”

“I’m not at liberty to comment,” he chuckles.

“Question asked, question answered.”

“Enough about Liam. Have I mentioned how stunning you look?”

“No, but thanks for the compliment anyway.”

She smiled, getting lost in his eyes as they swayed to the music.  

After sitting and watching Drake and Riley dance and flirt for hours Mack was about ready to go.

“Ri, I’m about ready to head out.”

“Riley reluctantly said her goodbyes to Drake, not knowing when she’d see him again. 

After a short drive back to her place they arrived to see a red Jeep sitting idle in front of her door waiting. Riley looked at Mack and shrugged her shoulders. When she had said goodnight to her friend, she headed to the door. The window of the Jeep lowered, “Hey, could you tell me where to get something good to eat in this neighborhood?” 

“Drake! What-- how did you know where I lived?”

“Guestbook.”

“Well, that isn’t creepy at all.” 

“I’m hungry and thought you might be hungry too.” 

“So, where to?”

“I don’t know, I have only been here a few weeks.”

“I know a place.”

Drake gets out of the truck and walks around waving at Mack, who is still watching from her car. He opens the door for Riley and grabs her by the waist helping her into the truck.

“Really? Such a gentleman.”

He smiles as he heads back around. Mack lowers her window and says, “I took a picture of your license plates just in case she doesn’t make it back.”

“Noted.”

“Thank you. So where are we going?”

“Whataburger. I can’t get that in Cordonia.”

“What the what?”

“You’ll love it, promise and it’s on me. Seat belt.”

“Let me ask you a question?”

“Just one?”

“God no, I have a million questions.”

“Ok, I will try my best to answer them.”

She thinks of what she wants to ask first.

“What did you honestly think when you saw me today?”

“That I am not this lucky.”

A blush crept across her face as she awkwardly shifted in the seat.

“Why do you live in Cordonia if your Mom and Sister are here?”

“Work is there. Besides, I have never had a good reason to come back.”

“I see.”

 Her face betrayed her, she was feeling conflicted and defeated and it showed. They drove along the dark road quietly for a few minutes.

“So, uh, you must do important work in Cordonia for you to stay there instead of here with your family.”

“If you want to know what I do for a living Raye, just ask.”

“You told me not to and I respect your wishes.”

“Well, some would consider it important. My family won’t be here for long, Sav and my nephew are moving to Cordonia this week. I’m the lead for the King’s Guard.”

“You mean you protect Liam?”

“Yeah,” he says as he rubs the back of his neck.

Just then they pulled into the parking lot. The line in the drive thru was long so they headed inside. He held the door open for her and when they stood in front of the counter he stood directly behind her as they both looked up at the menu. He rubbed his hands up and down her arms when he noticed her shiver. 

“Cold?”

“Yeah, a little. Also, overwhelmed with this menu. Order for me?”

A mischievous grin crept across his face as he placed his suit coat around her shoulders. 

After an hour of probing conversation, many laughs, and eating a deliciously greasy burger, heavenly fries with as Drake called it “fancy fucking ketchup,” they headed back to her place. 

“Drake, I’m not ready for tonight to end,” she confessed.

“I know the feeling.”

“Come upstairs with me?”

“Riley Elizabeth Raye! What kind of guy do you think I am?”

“The kind who steals people’s personal information out of wedding guest books.” 

“Checkmate.”

“Besides, I have had these shoes on since this morning. My feet! Anyway, we can watch a movie and chat for a little while.”

“I have been told I give a mean foot massage.”

“Are you offering?”

He licks his lips and bites his lips. Her center twitched.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what? Why are you looking at me like you want to climb in my lap?

Her cheeks flushed red.

“You wish.”

“Enough about that, let’s talk about our first real date.”

“Who said I wanted to date a guy with no real reason to come to Dallas?”

“Whoa, that was before.”

They headed up to her apartment. He stood so close to her in the elevator that she could feel his body heat. They had a staring contest that she lost. She definitely looked away first. It was like he was staring into her soul. The sexual tension was thick and she felt relieved when the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. 

“Long distance dating is not exactly something I want to pursue.”

“Understandable. I’m here now. Let me take you out tomorrow.”

“What would that look like?”

“Dallas Jazz fest is tomorrow.”

“And you just happened to know that off the top of your head?”

“I might have done some research on my phone when I learned that a certain lady whom I’d like to impress was within my grasp.”

She chortled, “you like jazz?”

“No, but if I get to spend time with you it can’t be that bad.”

“You’d do that for me?”

They step inside her place and he makes a face. 

“What is it?”

“Your place smells exactly like I expected, fruity.”

She invites Drake to sit as she kicks her shoes off. She moves around the counter and opens the fridge grabbing a couple bottles of water, a bottle of Glenmorangie, and a couple glasses. 

“Raye, this is the good stuff. It’s really expensive. Sure you’re sharing?”

“Completely, pour me one too? Be right back,” she says as she headed into her bedroom to change and freshen up.

When she returned, Drake cleared his throat at the sight of her barely there clothing change. 

They settled on the soft couch as Drake passed her the tumbler of whiskey he poured for her. She eyed the drink as he stared at her. 

“What are you looking at?”

“Your umm, outfit? Comfy?”

“Yes. Very. Should I drink this? I didn’t see you pour it.”

“Good grief, switch with me.” Drake says before raising his glass.

“Cheers, to the best reason I ever had to come back to the States.”

She bit her lip trying to contain her smile.

“Well then, after a toast like that you get to pick the movie.”

She later regretted being so generous. Drake chose FACE OFF. They started off good, he pulled her aching feet into his lap and rubbed them until she was sure she would orgasm. She pulled away crossing her legs in a twisted attempt to save her panties. 

She loved the movie but knew she couldn’t get through any of the scenes when they ran their hands down the others face to wordlessly say, I love you. So as much as she tried she sat with tears running down her face for much of the movie. The first time she cried Drake pretended to ignore it. She wiped her face on her. The next time she cried he looked at her with a raised eyebrow and the final time he pulled her into his arms and wiped her tears.

“You definitely get to pick a movie that won’t make you cry next time.”

“Next time? You really want to go out with me, huh?”

“I thought that was clear by now.”

  “Drake, can I be honest?”

“I’d prefer it.”

“I have never dated a white guy before.”

He feigned shock. Then laughed. 

“We have that in common because I haven't either. Is that all?”

“No, I didn’t expect to like you this much.”

“Have you dated a black woman before?”

“No.”

“Are you ready for family and friends to turn their backs on you? For strangers to shoot us dirty looks in public? For all of the things that come along with dating me?”

“I guess I never really thought about it. But I’d like to think that it would be a small price to pay to be with you.”

 They chatted until they both fell asleep. The sunrise plucked him from his slumber. She had fallen asleep in his arms. He watched her for a few moments fighting the urge to kiss her. He untangled himself from her and used her restroom. When he returned, she was awake. 

“I thought you finally came to your senses and left.”

“I don’t scare easily. I’m headed back to the ranch. I’ll pick you up around 6pm.”

She stood and they shared a long embrace as she secretly sniffed him trying to memorize his smell before she let him out.

Back at the ranch

“You stayed out all night. Did you get some trim?”

“No.”

Figures. You wouldn’t know what to do with all that ass anyway.

“And you do?” Carsyn interjects.

“Carsyn, I didn’t realize you were back from your morning run.”

“I knew that you wanted to fuck her. I saw the way you were looking at her at the wedding.”

Drake stands, “This seems like a personal conversation. Call me later Li.”

Liam shakes his head and turns to his wife. 

“You are always making a big deal out of nothing. I have given you everything. You knew who I was before you married Me. You are the queen. Why are you so insecure?”

Tears filled her eyes. 

“Name one thing you regret in life?”  “Well, for starters, I married you.”

Liam stormed out of the room to find Drake in the hall on the phone with Riley. When Drake sees Liam he ends the call.

“Drake Walker. Your nose is open. I know you think you like her but, do you really want to start seeing a black woman? They can be a lot.”

“Don’t be an ass Li, any woman can be a lot. But it’s different with her. She is so chill. Like it’s easy with her.” 

“If it’s so easy, why didn’t you close?”

“I said that it’s easy to be with her. Not that she was easy you, prick.”

“Just be careful Drake. You know what they say… Once you go black…”

“Li! For fucks sake.”

“I’m just saying. I’m going out tonight so if you need a trial run Carsyn will be here alone.”

“Did you just give me permission to fuck your wife?”

“Sure, everyone knows I’m not.”

“Hard pass.”

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[styles-89]

delicate ; a love story.

chapter one: all new beginnings must require old endings.

authors note: hi!! this is my first jim halpert x reader fic :) i hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it! also, thank you for the support on my previous writings. flashbacks/flash forwards will be in bold and talking heads will be in bold with italics!

WARNING: language

-

February 25, 2005

Y/N clears her throat, crossing her legs as she sits in small, uncomfortable grey chair. In the background people are working at their desks, a man turns and glances at Y/N in the conference room with the crew. He turns back and makes eye contact with the camera, that was zoomed in on his reaction. He bites the inside of his cheek and goes back to his work, having a look on his face like he got caught doing something.

“What do I say?” Y/N asks, leaning forward towards the camera, then sitting back in the chair. “Oh, I started working at Dunder Mifflin about a year and a half ago? I’m the receptionist here. Boring, I know. I..sit in at meetings, uh, transfer clients. I also write stories! Sometimes, when I’m free. No-one has really seen them, except Jim.” Y/N looks down and fiddles with her bracelet. “Jim’s probably my best friend.” Y/N responds to the crew, the question of her relationship with the man coming up. She nods and smiles. “He’s the best salesmen I know. Everytime he makes a sale we air high five.” Y/N chuckles and smiles brightly at the camera.

“Caleb? He’s my boyfriend. He works in the warehouse. Helped me get this job.” Y/N nods, her smile faltering but a smirk staying on her face. “He’s great, we’ve been dating for...four years. He still has yet to pop the question but you know, we’re saving money, haha.” She smiles and chuckles. “Oh that’s it? Okay cool, uh, if you guys need anything don’t be afraid to come over to my desk and ask.” Y/N stands, and gives a small wave to the crew and camera before she exits the room.

“So, how was it?” Jim asks, leaning back in his chair, looking the woman up and down that was leaning up against his desk slowly, trying to find a trace of concern or outright disgust. Most of the employees at Dunder Mifflin, especially at the Scranton branch, were concerned with the idea of a documentary being filmed. Y/N seemed to like the idea. “It was fine, you just talk about yourself and your job.” She readjusted herself to now be sitting on Jim’s desk, legs dangling off. Y/N eyes the camera that was now standing near the two of them. This would take some getting used to. “So, Y/L/N, you want to go to Poor Richards tonight?” Jim asks, poking the top of her knee. Dwight perks his head up looking over at the two. “Shouldn’t you be working?” He asks, and Y/N rolls her eyes.

A ring was heard from reception, and Y/N hurried over to the phone after shrugging in Jim’s direction, picking it up. “Dunder Mifflin, this is Y/N. Yes, I’ll transfer you.” Y/N says into the phone, sitting back down in front of her computer monitor. “Dunder Mifflin, this Y/N.” She pressed the phone to her ear and her shoulder, writing on a sticky note ‘You mean, like a date?’ “Oh uhm,” The caller was asking to speak to Micheal, but he wasn’t in his office. “Where’d he go?” Y/N mouths to Jim, and he returns with a shrug. “Micheal isn’t here right now, may I take a message?” She asks, setting the separate sticky note to the side and grabbing another one to write down what the person on the other line needed. “Got it. Thank you!”

Y/N stood up and took both of the sticky notes, one to Micheal’s office, sticking it on his computer monitor, and walking over to Jim, placing the purple piece of paper on his shoulder. She would just joke with him out loud but didn’t want Dwight staring at them again. Jim looked over at Y/N, who was now back at her desk and lowered his eyes, a hand resting on his face. She let out a pretty peal of laughter, a pink tint on her cheeks. Their jokes is what got both of them through the day.

“Y/N?” The crew had asked him how he felt about Y/N and her affect since working here. “She’s a great friend. Very easy to talk to..warm, energetic and positive.” Jim comments, biting his lower lip gently. “Why do you ask?”

At the stroke of 5p.m., Y/N stood up and took her coat off of the coat rack, finding some ways to stall to talk to Jim by stacking the post-it notes, putting the scattered paper clips in their rightful container, making sure her computer was properly turned off. After what seemed like an hour of judgement from other employees as they left (it was only about two minutes), Jim approached her. “I’m assuming your in?” He asks and Y/N smiles. “Hell yes. I haven’t gone out to Poor Richards with you in forever.” She says, stuffing her hands nervously in her coat pockets. “Wait, were going to Poor Richards?” Kelly calls back to them and Y/N’s eyes widen, realizing how loud she was. “Guys were going to Poor Richards!” Kelly called down the hall, earning a few cheers from the other employees.

“I love my coworkers.” Jim says, sighing, and clicking his tongue to his cheek. “But Y/N is the only one who understands the pain of group outings. It’s mainly one of the reasons why we do things with eachother, without the rest of the Scranton branch.”

Y/N and Jim laugh at the same time, the camera zooming in on Caleb as he enters the office right when the two of them were about to leave. “Hey, baby.” Y/N says, pressing a kiss to Calebs lips, his hands resting on her waist. Jim looks into the camera with a frown as he fiddled with his car keys. “So Jim and I were going to go to Poor Richards, if that’s okay with you?” Y/N asks, keeping her arms wrapped around his neck. “Oh, babe..I kinda wanted you to come home tonight, you know..the reasons why.” He grumbles and Y/N looks at the camera, Jim looking visibly flustered and uncomfortable in the background. “Uhh..I just- haven’t gone out with them in awhile.” Y/N separates from Caleb and he frowns. “Fine. You can. Love you.” Caleb says before placing a kiss on her forehead. “Take care of her, Halpert.” Caleb says and Jim nods. “Will do.” He says awkwardly, chuckling afterwards.

“Guess I’m all yours tonight.” Y/N giggles, walking down the stairwell, Jim not far behind her. “Haha, yeah..” He trails off and Y/N stops and looks up at him. It was tremendously cold in the stairwell, but it was their safe space. “Somethings wrong.” Y/N says and Jim shakes his head. “I know that face.” She retorts. “What face?” His eyebrows furrow as he looked in her direction. “The face were you think really hard about something, were your concerned.” She points out and Jim smirks. They really had memorized each other, like a book they had read multiple times. Other miscellaneous things they knew about eachother: Jim’s favorite pen color is blue. Y/N’s favorite yogurt flavor is strawberry. 

“I’m just thinking about Caleb. Why didn’t he want to let you leave, besides..you know.” Jim mocked Caleb’s grumble, this made Y/N laugh. “I don’t know.” She says, continuing down the stairs but she frowns. “Sometimes I just don’t get him.” She confessed, and Jim’s face softened. The camera crew slips into a corner so it is out of view. Jim rolls his eyes and pushes the door open with his back. “Boys! Amirite?” He jokes, which made Y/N smile. Jim rushes over and opens Y/N’s door, to which she thanks him. The camera crew watches as the car drives away. “Do you think everyone else is already there?” Y/N asks and Jim shrugs, focusing on the road. “Thanks for taking me, by the way.” Y/N comments and Jim smiles. “No problem.”

After a couple of hours of hanging around the bar and Y/N getting hammered, the crew filming most of the experience, Jim decides it’s best if he takes Y/N home. He had successfully put her in his car and buckled her, and once he was in the car, Y/N wrapped her arms around his arm while giggling. “Wow. You are SO drunk!” He exclaims and eyes the girl, a gentle, caring smile on his face. The camera zooms in on the two, the view being from another car. “I’m perfectly sober!” Y/N cheers and Jim shakes his head as he pulled up to a red light, the camera filming them in the next car over. “Would I do this if I wasn’t sober?” “Do what-” And just like that, time stopped.

Y/N’s lips were on Jim’s, and Jim’s eyes widened, but he relunctly placed a hand on the back of her head, cradling softly as he closed his eyes. It was so pure, so delicate. The light had turned green, and a car honked behind them. Jim immediately pulled away, stepping on the gas, the camera getting a shot of them as they veered off. Y/N giggled and covered her mouth, then threw up in a bag that Jim had given to her just incase of an incident like this. He didn’t really have time to process what had just happened, and he rolled his eyes as he placed a hand on her back, rubbing it gently. He pulled up to his house, seeing his roommate was home. Jim was going to take her back to her house, but he was scared that she wouldn’t be able to articulate without some sort of assistance, and Jim presumed Caleb was already asleep.

Jim helped Y/N out of the car and walked into the small house and his roommate smiled. “So this is her?” He asked and Jim glared at him and sat Y/N down. “Just get me a glass of water, asshole.” He comments and takes his flip phone out, texting Caleb.

‘Hey, it’s Jim. Y/N got really drunk and she puked in my car, so I took her back to my house. Don’t worry, I’ll sleep on the couch. Have a good night.’

“What am I going to do with you?” Jim asked and shook his head. Y/N made ‘grabby hands’ towards him and his obliged, sitting on the couch with her, her body shifting so her head was now on his lap. He smiled down at the girl and quickly turned on the TV. Jim could feel Y/N slip out of consciousness by her breathing and he smiled again, taking a moment to take this in. He stroked her hair and he swallowed harshly, remembering what had happened earlier. Jim bit his lower lip and sighed, then took the girl up in his arms, bridal style, and walked to his room, placing her on his bed, and covering her with the blanket.

The next morning, Jim cooked breakfast for her, gave her medicine, and let her know of what had happened last night. She was taken aback, wondering why she would do such actions. She apologized profusely, to which Jim just smiled and shook his head, replying with a ‘you’re fine.’ Classic boy-next-door Jim. Y/N went home, and didn’t tell Caleb. There was no reason to. She was drunk, and didn’t remember the events. The weekend flew by in a flash, and soon it was Monday again.

Y/N walked into work with a bright smile on her face. That smile quickly faltered as whisperings were made by her other coworkers, and she made eye contact with Jim. Had he told someone? No, surely he hadn’t. Y/N’a eyes faltered from Jim as she sat behind her desk and Jim tapped his pen on desk. Dwight taps his desk a single time and Jim looks over at him, raising his eyebrows. “Y/N has a boyfriend.” Dwight quickly says, and Jim nods. “Yes, I know. Why are you telling me this?” He asks, really not wanting any of Dwight’s antics at the moment. “Because you kissed her.” Jim’s heart sank into the bottom of his stomach. “..Who told you that?” He whispered, glancing at the camera, and Dwight points at the crew member holding the camera. Jim looked at the camera and clenched his jaw.

“How long does this documentary have to be?” Jim asks, his hands folded in his lap as he clenched his jaw.

Y/N wrote sloppily, she was jotting down ideas for her writings. Not that anyone would see them. “Y/N?!” Caleb calls and Y/N stands up. He sounded angry. “Caleb? What’s up?” She asks, walking from behind the reception desk. “You kissed Jim?!” He yelled and Jim turned away from the gaze of Caleb, spinning in his chair as he looked in the camera. The whole office knew by now. “I-I was drunk! And it’s not like it meant anything!” Caleb had a right to be upset, after all, she had kissed him even if she didn’t remember it. “I’m sorry..” She trailed off and Caleb clenched his fists. “Sorry isn’t gonna cut it! You hang out with Jim all the time, how will I know if you don’t do something like this again?! We’re over. I want you moved out of the apartment by tonight.” Caleb angerily says and Jim looked over at Caleb, standing up. “Hey, man, she didn’t mean-” “I don’t want to hear it, Halpert. You kissed back.” He spat. Y/N looked over at Jim before she watched Caleb storm out of the office. He was gone. The man she wanted to marry, spend the rest of her life with, was gone. He wanted her gone.

“Y/N.” Jim quickly said and Y/N tears up, looking up at him. She just threw away four years of her life she would never get back. “I can’t..” She said and rushed out into the hallway, and finally into the stairwell. Jim followed close behind. “Hey..” Jim soothed and wrapped his arms around her, her head now resting on his chest as she wept. He rubbed her back gently and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, looking over at the camera. “You’re going to be okay, Y/L/N.” He comforted, and Y/N sputtered. “I don’t have a place to live! He wants- me gone by tonight.” Y/N hiccups and Jim holds her tighter, thinking of ways he could help her. “Hey! Crazy idea, you can stay at my place until you find somewhere to stay.” Jim suggests. He hadn’t even talked to his roommate.

“Are you sure? I- that’s.” Y/N tries to the find words to show her appreciation, and wraps her arms around his neck, standing on her tippy toes to hold onto him. Jim wraps his arms around her waist and closes his eyes, holding her tightly once more.

And just like that, Jim knew this was the right thing to do. He took in her scent, the softness of her skin, and the many giggles coming from her.

“I’d do anything for her.” Jim says confidently, before his eyes fell from view of the camera. “She’s my best friend.”

-

taglist: @jackryanplz

[rafeswife]

CHAPTER ONE

Don’t forget to call me when you make it there safe!”

My mom yelled out at me as I scrambled to the door in a rush. A bag was on my shoulder full of hidden alcohol I had wrapped inside of towels, along with some snacks. I was currently on the way to see the pogues, unknowing to my mother who thought I was visiting the Cameron’s with baked goods.

I had lived in the Outerbanks for only a few weeks and the slang I had accumulated from hanging around the island still felt alien to me. My mother was a Interior Designer for one of the biggest home renovating shows in America, so moving around was nothing out of the ordinary for me. We had traveled from California to Ohio and my mothers next big project was none other then the North Carolina coast.

I had only met few people in my time on the island. On the second night of my stay I was greeted by a blonde girl who I soon placed as Sarah Cameron. The resident princess of the island; at least thats what I picked up on from listening to the Pogues. She was kind to me, it was a short exchange at the market. She recognized me as someone who wasn’t local and told me to text her if I ever needed help finding my way around the Outerbanks. We exchanged numbers and she left in a car of others in a rush.

Bringing me to my very first group of people I met on the island. My new house was in a place called Figure 8 and my next door neighbor was Kiera Carrera. One day while I was moving boxes into my house, I looked back and saw a Kiera on her porch she was in some sort of argument with her parents. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but their voices were anything but quiet. She was in a fight with her parents as she made her way down the steps. They shouted words that I didn’t understand at the time like “pogues” and “kooks” and “midsummars”.

All I knew was that I had been through what she had and I wanted to tell her it was going to be okay. Although it was none of my business, I waited for her parents to go inside as I placed the box of antiques down and made my way to the curb she sat on. I spoke to her about my parents divorce and I told her that it was okay to feel the way she was feeling. Our exchange led to her inviting me to her friend John Bs house. I don’t know why they added the B in John but I didn’t bother to ask. I met John B, and two other guys at his house. It gave me a close feel to a cabin with a tropic twist if that makes sense. John B was genuine, he told me stories of his father and welcomed me into his home with his arms open. On the other hand JJ was skeptical at first taking a minute to warm up to me because of the place where my home resided. He explained to me how the Kooks were selfish, rich people and the Pogues were the ones always ready for a good time on the island. He was fairly good looking but I shook away that thought because I could feel tension between him and Kiera. He then offered me a drink and told a few jokes that made me ugly laugh. Pope was the last boy I was acquainted with, he struck me as intelligent and determined. He seemed more worried of what I thought of them, telling JJ to calm down at times and asking Kiera questions about me. Overall the group and I had a good time and I left a good enough impression to be invited back.

Which leads me back to where I was headed. Kie invited me to a giant get together, they called it a Kegger which was just a party in Pogue language. I hopped inside my car and made my way to the beach, looking for a spot that others hadn’t found out about yet and parking. Shutting my car door and hitting the locks, I slung my backpack around me and followed the crowd. Which would’ve been the only way I knew where I was going if it wasn’t for the massive bonfire that was radiating smoke. I walked down to the secluded area and around the corner of a building saw hundreds and hundreds of people.

this has to be half of the town.

Quickly my anxiety began to creep up inside of me. As strange as it sounded because I moved all the time, I was very nervous around new people. Taking my shoes off of my newly tanned feet I stepped into the sand. I searched the beach squinting looking for the familiar faces of John B or Kiera but I was out of luck. I excused my way through strangers hoping I would run into one of the four Pogues. Digging my fingers into my hands and tugging at my backpack, I began to grow impatient.

Suddenly interrupting me from my intruding thoughts was a warm substance seeping down my white top. My eyes were met with a tall boy, who’s shoulders were broad and hair was slicked back. He held a bottle of beer in his hand as his blue eyes were set on my top.

“Oh no, I’m so sorry!”

I blurted out, it was my fault he had spilt his drink after all. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going causing me to ram into the guy.

“I should be the one apologizing, here come with me my sister probably has a extra shirt.”

He then proceeded to grabbing my hand and pulling me through the crowd of guests.

This guy was really hot if I had to admit, his collared polo complimented his body and his hands were filled with veins. Not to mention he had on a ring, A RING! I normally didn’t try to involve myself with boys because of how much I moved around. Having to leave the last boyfriend I had behind was gut wrenching, but… I could make an exception. It had been forever since I had been with any guy and I was craving something a little more than holding hands.

As we pushed past the final few people we stopped around and empty area. The boy looked off into the distance at a girl on top of some sort of wooden post and a blonde guy struggling to get her to come down. In fact, I knew that girl. It was-

“Sarah! Come here!”

I was startled by the loud outburst beside me. Sarah was his sister… That must’ve meant he was Rafe. Dammit.

flashback

“Every Kook is BAD, now repeat after me”

JJ had a very strong opinion about the richer class, I wonder what the reason was. What about Sarah Cameron, she seemed sweet.

“I met this girl named Sarah the other day, she was actually really welcoming.”

“Sarah CAMERON?”

Kiera blurted in sort of a grimace. She didn’t seem to be too fond of her.

“Sarah Cameron is the epitome of a snobby, entitled little brat. She always gets whatever she wants and doesn’t care about anyone other then herself.”

Kiera seemed to share a popular opinion amongst the Pogues based on their reaction to her outburst. They all nodded their heads in unison.

“Don’t even get me started on her brother Rafe! He is even worse, he treats the Pogues like shit and gets away with it every single time because he goes crying to his daddy.”

Her opinions on the two struck me as cruel. I didn’t know the two so clearly I couldn’t just defend them but, I didn’t like the way the Pogues spoke so poorly of the Kooks. It seemed wrong. Especially because when I met Sarah she was anything but a “brat”.

“Just don’t get involved with them. For your own good.”

JJ said, I could tell he was amused with making fun of the Cameron siblings. John B looked at my face and could tell something was off.

“Alright, Alright, I think you guys are started to scare the girl. Let’s go check out the waves.”

end of flashback

Sarah jumped off the pole without any regrets swinging around in what I assumed to be her boyfriends arms and making her way over to the two of us.

“Yes Rafe. What is so important that-“

Her gaze met mine.

“Alexis!”

She pulled me in for a hug quickly, my nose whiffing the smell of alcohol on her. Or on me.

“Hey Sarah”

“What happened!”

She exclaimed looking down at my shirt that was stuck to my skin.

“It was an accident,”

Rafe butted in.

“Rafe.”

She drug out in anger.

“We haven’t even met the girl for more than a second and you already have spilt your drink on her. Typical.”

I looked over at Rafe in pity for a split second but then I remembered this was a sibling thing to do. It was normal for brothers and sisters to argue, I didn’t know much about it because I was an only child.

“Shut up Sarah”

“It was my fault honestly, I wasn’t watching where I was walking.”

I nervously broke the tension. They both looked at me for a split second and then the silence was stopped by Sarah taking her shirt off. I was surprised by the Cameron girls boldness.

“Chill out girl, I’ve got a swimsuit and from the looks of it you don’t plus since Rafe did this too you he can kindly take you to his car so you can change.”

Sarah tossed me the top and ran for the water waving a goodbye with a warm smile. She was gorgeous, and she made me feel good. The Pogues seemed closed minded, and my views on things were beginning to shift since they were no where in sight, even though they said they were going to meet me here. Adding onto my perspective was the fact that Sarah and Rafe were there.

“She’s a handful. I’m Rafe by the way, which you probably gathered.”

His eyes were a little red, he must have been smoking. His voice seemed a little droopy but it was still sexy. My feet followed the direction of his as I held the shirt in my hand.

“Nice to meet you, Rafe. I’m Alexis.”

My voice was a bit shaky but confident. I liked to sound confident when I met others even though I wasn’t. We shortly arrived at his jeep, and he unlocked the doors.

“Can I put this bag down somewhere?”

I said picking the heavy weight off of my shoulder.

“Yeah, here let me see it.”

I rubbed my sore skin as he grabbed the bag and sat it in the trunk.

“Beer in the towels, huh?”

I looked back at him.

“Hey, who said you could be nosy?”

I playfully smiled at him.

“No one, but I was just curious what you were carrying around, I mean for all I know it could’ve been drugs.”

“You probably would’ve been happier with that outcome, huh?”

He laughed. His laugh. Holy shit his laugh. It was so hot.

“Can you grab me a drink?, I need one”

I asked desperately.

“If I can snatch one too then deal”

I nodded at his remark and hopped inside of his car grabbing the drink from his hand. I sat the drink in a cup holder as I took my soaked shirt off. I sat it to the side and then looked at my bra.

“Shit”

It was soaked too, I took it off as well praying it wasn’t getting any colder tonight as I slipped on the yellow tank top Sarah gave me.

I grabbed my drink, took a swig and opened the car door. I looked out and Rafe was already crushing his can sitting on the hood of the car.

“Want another?”

I offered reaching in my bag and extending my hand. He turned his head and looked at me for a few seconds. My hand waiting for release from the beverage but it never came. Then I realized why as I looked down at my shirt. You could see through. Before I looked back up he grabbed the drink clearly as embarrassed as I was.

“Yeah uh sorry”

His hand scratching the back of his neck as he opened the can. I brushed off the exchange and got up on the hood of his car with him looking at the party from afar taking another sip.

“So, you’re new ay?”

Rafe said.

“Yeah, I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.”

He wasn’t making eye contact with me and neither was I. It wasn’t uncomfortable though. The scenery was calm. The stars looked perfect and the sound of the faded party and waves were in perfect harmony.

“Who invited you here?”

“Just some people I met, they told me they would meet me but didn’t follow through.”

“Screw them. You should come hang out with us.”

His invite made me feel warm. I looked over at him taking a sip of the drink, I watched as it gilded down his throat. His adam’s apple bobbing. He was a masterpiece. I must’ve been looking a little too long because he whipped his head around at me. I quickly averted my gaze away embarrassed.

“Yeah I will definitely take you up on that offer, I can’t stand unreliable people.”

We were close. His hand smoothed it way to my knee. Yes please.

“Neither can I, good thing we are reliable. Even got you a new shirt.”

He stared back down as he made this statement clearly looking at my boobs. Quite frankly I was flattered.

“Eyes are up here buddy boy”

I cringed at my own words but being a couple of drinks in at this point I didn’t care.

“I know”

He said. His hand slid a little further up my leg placing on my thigh. Higher. and higher.

“You have a boyfriend?”

He asked, I laughed at this. Hard. My laugh was one of those laughs that sounded so stupid other people would laugh at it. So as I kept laughing he began to laugh as well.

“w-what”

His high was probably making my laugh sound even more strange then it already was.

“Nothing just that question is funny.”

BOOM

Both of us flinched as we looked away from eachother. That was a gun shot. I frantically got up.

“What the fuck, we need to get out of here”

Rafe yelled. I looked at him in a panic.

“What about Sarah!”

I shouted back.

“We will grab her in the car, now get in.”

The Pogues were still down there. I looked at Rafe as he sat in the car and looked down at all the people running away from the scene. I had to make a decision quickly.

The Kooks or The Pogues



[jinkicake]

Oh, So Sweet

Daichi, Kageyama, Tsukishima with a very sweet and caring s/o that comes off as mean because they struggle with handling their feelings.

Kageyama Tobio x Reader

Sawamura Daichi x Reader

Tsukishima Kei x Reader

For Anon </3 ~~ I hope it’s good!! Sorry for the riverdale slander, it’s bold of me to talk shit when I actually watch the show but I could not pass up the opportunity. LMAO Those poor actors...

WC- 1,552

~~~

Kageyama Tobio

I feel like he’d understand this too well

Poor baby is so cold and reserved but he’s just trying his best

You would probably come off just as mean as he is

It’s a match made in Heaven

Hinata dubs you as the ‘perfect match for Kageyama’ 

Two people who aren’t the best at dealing with their emotions might sound like a train wreck, but it’s not 

It would be an experience, the two of you would help the other better understand each of the emotions you have

If you ever end up saying something defensively and it comes out as something you don’t mean, Kageyama would be able to pick up on your discomfort rather quickly

He’d either take over the conversation for you or try to help you say what you actually want to

The two of you would just comfort the other in a way you’d never felt before, it’s really beneficial~

You appreciate him so much and Kageyama appreciates you, even if he doesn’t say it as much as he should, really he does

“I-I like you.” Kageyama confesses and you stand there in shock, your finger hovering over the vending machine button.

“W-what?” You glance around, trying to look anywhere but Kageyama’s deep blue eyes. “I don’t understand.” You truly didn’t. You should be feeling ecstatic and over the moon but instead, you feel utterly confused. Kageyama looks down at his shoes, his back stiffening at your words. Don’t you see that he likes you? “You like me in a romantic way?” You repeat his previous words but keep your focus on the vending machine, reaching down to grab the water you picked earlier. Kageyama nods. “Oh, I appreciate you saying that. Thank you.”

An award silence falls over the two of you and you unscrew your drink before taking a big gulp from it. You choose to play with the plastic on the bottle. 

“Is that all you have to say?”

Kageyama nearly flinches at your words, this is not the reaction he was hoping for. If he didn’t feel utterly humiliated before, this was an all-new low for him now.

“Yes.” He tells you and you nod again as you try to ignore the rapid beating in your heart. You need to tell him how you feel before he walks away.

“Kageyama, I feel the same way.” You’re still unable to look at him, watch as his eyes blow wide in amazement,and watch as his the weight on his chest disappears.

“C-cool.” Kageyama responds weakly and shoves his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah, cool.”

Daichi Sawamura

Daichi is such a caring and understanding person that he’d be able to help you a lot

Before the two of you started dating he would get caught off guard by your frowardness and blunt attitude, or your lack of emotion in certain aspects

He didn’t dislike it, he was just not used to it

However as the two of you start to get to know each other and eventually start dating, he would find out you’re just as big of a sweetheart as he is

Maybe even more

He’d really help you relax when you feel tense and he’d be able to ease the words out of you

He would be able to get you to talk about how you’re feeling and make sense of what you’re facing

Daichi would always be proud of you, especially when you show him that good grade you got on an assignment you were working forever on

His praise would really help you feel better, it would help you trust him better

Daichi is such a responsible person, he’d be so well at motivating and caring for you~~

“(Y/N) can you help me with the homework?” Sugawara comes up and asks you one day during lunch. “I heard you were really good at these math equations.”

“Oh, sure.” Your tone had an edge to it as if you were bothered by his presence but that couldn’t be far less than the truth. You adored Sugawara and were over the moon that such a good friend of your boyfriend wanted to talk with you. “What question do you want to work on?” Sugawara points to one of the more difficult ones and you can’t help the laugh that leaves your throat when you think about how much you wanted to pull your hair out last night when you were working on it.

“Is it too easy or something, am I just dumb?” Sugawara jokes and you tense up in horror, is that what he thinks? Does he think you find him stupid?

“No, it is a difficult question.” You push lamely and grab your notebook, flipping it open to the problem and handing it to the setter. Over the next couple of minutes, you slowly explain in detail how to get the answer and you can practically see the gears turning in Sugawara’s head.

“Oh, it’s 54 isn’t it?” He asks, partially shocked that he actually got it simply from following your instructions.

“Yeah!” You smile widly, feeling just as excited. Sugawara thanks you over and over and you tell him it’s nothing to worry about.

“Next time, we should work on biology!” He suggests and you nod your head, eager to work with your refreshing classmate. “I’ll see you after lunch okay?”

It wasn’t until later at night when you were at home fixing up your biology notes did you get a text from your boyfriend.

Daichi </3 - Sugawara would not stop talking about you during practice, he was gushing about you constantly -.-

You - Really?

Daichi </3 - Yes, he thinks you’re the best, (Y/N), and he was very vocal about letting everyone know about it. I was almost jealous..

Daichi </3 - Babe,

Daichi </3 - I love you

Your face heats up and you squeal into your shoulder before quickly typing the same thing back.

Tsukishima Kei

Tsukishima is kind of the same, he is not the best at handling his feelings and does come off as very rude and mean

The difference between you and him is that he simply does not care if he comes off this way, he probably wants to

When he started dating you he really quickly understood how you felt, it’s something you two bonded over

Once he figures it out that you’re not the best with your feelings then it will all make sense to him

How you can have the most gentle and sweet face but your words turn out to be cold and distant

He’d be good at reading you but every now and then you’ll have to communicate with him because he can’t read you all the time

Tsukki would be really good at acting as a buffer between you and his friends if you say something that comes off harsh 

He would back you up and make the situation more light after the atmosphere drops

Tsukishima would probably not be the best with helping you figure out your emotions but he is trying, very hard, to help you see whatever he sees

He is a very caring asshole and I love him

“(Y/N) come to the amusement park with us this weekend!” Hinata begs, too bright-eyed for your liking. You’re too tired after school to even hide the distaste on your face.

“Umm, no.” You bite the inside of his cheek and watch as he tilts his head in confusion, Yamaguchi’s face falls beside him. “I don’t want to go, maybe next time.” It’s not that you didn’t like them, but you just weren’t close enough with them yet. Truthfully you didn’t want to intrude on their hangouts, you felt as if you’d bring down their vibe.

“She’s not going dumbass, leave her alone.” Tsukishima stands tall behind you, glowering down at Hinata as he tries to shoo the small boy away with his eyes. Much to your relief, Yachi comes and leads the two boys back to the gym before they can say anything else.

“You didn’t want to go Kei?” You ask nervously, glancing back at your boyfriend to make sure he wasn’t upset.

“You couldn’t pay me to go.” He snides and you can’t help but laugh against his chest, fully turning around to face him.

“Next time we should go though, I just didn’t intrude ya know?” You tell him and Tsukishima narrows his eyes at you from behind his glasses.

“Clearly they wanted you to go with them and didn’t think of you as a nuisance, idiot.” He knocks the back of his hand against your head and you start up at him with a pout. “Whatever, who cares about them, we can just hang out ourselves.” Tsukishima promises and wraps his arms around your shoulders, bringing you close to his chest before resting his chin on the top of your head.

“Really?” You can’t help the breathy tone at the offer to hangout with your boyfriend, you’re still excited as ever to hangout with him even though it is something you always do.

“Obviously,” Tsukishima rolls his eyes but then squeezes you in his arms, hiding his face in your hair. “We can watch that shitty show you like, it just came out with another season.”

“Oh, Riverdale?!”

“Yeah, that one.”

[holidaywishes]

Turning Page

  Requested: 👍

  Summary/Request: Please, please, please do 13. “your love is my turning page / where only the sweetest words remain” (turning page, sleeping at last) from the music prompt list with Freddie Andersen! I love everything that you write about him ! 💕

  Warning: angst, fluff, soft Freddie

  Author’s Note: I wanted to find a GIF of Freddie looking *wistfully* at the reader because that’s the vibe I got from this song upon first listen and this GIF really hit hard. I did a tiny bit of research on this song, as I often do for my fics, to see if it meant something to the songwriter and that’s when I found it was written for Twilight. It’s been like a decade since I’ve watched any of those movies so I had completely forgotten that any song other than Christina Perri’s a thousand years was used for Breaking Down... That being said, I still think this is a beautiful song that led itself quite wonderfully to some fluff. I didn’t want it to be a wedding though and I had to really stop myself for writing it that way and honestly, the angst kind of got away from me in this one, whoops! If you’d like to request a song prompt, for hockey players or characters from your favourite movies/TV shows, send ‘em my way and I will work on them! Stay Golden, loves! <3

  masterlist

  the other masterlist

  the song prompt masterlist

xx

Freddie’s P.O.V

  You met (Y/N) when you were 10 years old on her fifth birthday party. She had ribbons in her ponytails that intertwined with her soft hair easily and you laughed at the way she took a bow from one of her gifts to add it to the top of her head with a smile. A smile that permanently etched itself in your brain for years. She was the one who kept the friendship going after that day, saying she was curious about ‘Denmark’s Hockey Family’

  “I don’t know anything about Hockey” she said in her soft, almost squeaky, voice. You chuckled at her insistence but agreed to let her come to a few practices and teach her some things. After ten years, the two of you had become closer than you ever thought you would

  “Would you ever move to the States? Or Canada?” you asked and she scoffed at your question

  “Why?” she asked, adjusting the blanket on her lap while the two of you watched a movie

  “You know I want to go into the NHL...” you stammered, wondering if she’d say you were too old, at 20 years old, to get drafted

  “I know” was all she responded

  “Yeah...” you continued, rolling your eyes when she didn’t say anything more, “well, would you?”

  “Would I what?”

  “(Y/N)...” you laughed, “would you ever move there? like if I got drafted, would yo--”

  “Would I go with you?” she interrupted, finally understanding your point, “would you want me to?”

  “Well... yeah. I mean, if you wanted to. It would just be nice to have someone there... Who knew me, who knows me..” you stammered, keeping your head turned away from hers so you couldn’t see her reaction

  “Of course I’d go with you,” you could hear the smile on her voice, “I love... watching you play” after that, the two of you worked tirelessly to find out when a scout would be in the area but you worried that your time had passed.

  “FREDDIE!” your mom yelled for you as you sat outside

  “Ma?” you called back, rushing into the house to see what was wrong

  “THE DRAFT...” she screamed

  “Mom, calm down,” you smiled, “what about the draft?”

  “YOU GOT DRAFTED!!!!!!!!!!” (Y/N) screamed as she jumped on you, “OH MY GOD FREDDIE!!!” she peeled back to look at you, her arms wrapping around your neck, “YOU DID IT!”

  “Wh-aat?” you laughed, swinging your body around to watch the TV, “where?”

  “Anaheim!” your mom exclaimed and you took a deep breath, still not having set (Y/N) down

  “Well, shi--” you started, before catching your mom’s glare, “I mean... I guess I’m going to California!”

  “We’re so proud of you!” your parents smiled before walking over to you, enveloping you and (Y/N) together in a hug where you caught the scent of vanilla and coconut

  “So...” (Y/N) whispered in your ear, “does the offer still stand?” you leaned back to see her smiling before you nodded in return. Before you knew it, you were packing up your life to get on a plane and head overseas. She lived with you for a while until she couldn’t handle the girls who kept circling in and out of your apartment; the two of you fought, she cried, you tried to fix it but both of you agreed it was better if you had some space between the two of you. You’d hope she would see that you only wanted her and that the other girls were just there to... keep you warm because the timing was never right with (Y/N). When she was single, you were with someone. When you were single, she was with someone. Seeing her happy with someone else made your heart ache so you found people that would help you waste your time and everything was going fine until (Y/N) met someone

  “He’s from Canada,” she said, “Toronto. He’s an architect!”

  “An architect? Wow” you said, a bit in shock

  “Yeah,” she continued, “we’ve actually been seeing each other for a while now but he’s just been flying back and forth and I don’t think that’s fair. He says he doesn’t mind because he likes to see me, he says it’s the best part of his day actually,” her smile lightened her rambling but you still weren’t sure where she was going with this. “Anyway,” she sighed, “he’s asked me to... move there. With him”

  “Oh” you chuckled, thinking she’d said no. She moved to Anaheim with you, for you. She wouldn’t just leave you, would she?

  “And I said I would...” your eyes went wide as the words left her lips before you dropped your head. “It’s not like I’m forgetting about you,” she giggled, “or like I’m leaving you behind. I’ll still talk to you everyday and we’ll call and FaceTime and text and nothing will change”

  “Except you won’t be here” you scoffed, smiling pathetically to yourself before slumping onto the couch

  “I know, Freddie,” she sighed, sitting next to you and rubbing your back soothingly, “but let’s face it, our schedules are so different as it is. We barely see each other, I mean you didn’t even realize I was dating someone”

  “I’ve been busy!” you challenged

  “I know,” she chuckled, “I know, but that’s the point. I came here for you and I’m so happy that you asked me to come with you and I’m so happy that I’ve been here for you”

  “So why leave?” you argued

  “Because I love this guy!” she exclaimed, “and I don’t know how much longer I can wait around for you to come home so we can finally hang out”

  “FINE!” you said out of pure anger, standing up suddenly

  “Freddie, please,” she said quietly, remaining seated as you paced around the room, “I know this isn’t what either of us expected to happen but it did. I’d be stupid not to see this through.”

  “No, you’re right,” you agreed, bitterness on your tone, “but what if we never see each other again?”

  “Of course we’ll see each other again! Freddie our parents are best friends!”

  “I guess, I just mean...”

  “I promise we’ll see each other” she smiled, finally standing up to place her hand on your cheek. You knew she meant it but, as so often happens, time got away from the two of you and space got in the way. That is, until you got traded to the Maple Leafs

  “Looks like I’ll be coming out your way” you texted her as soon as you got the news

  “What do you mean?” she sent back and you assumed she hadn’t seen the announcement

  “I got traded... I’m coming to Toronto!”

  Incoming call from (Y/N)

  “Hey” you greeted

  “YOU’RE COMING HERE!” she exclaimed, screaming through the phone

  “It looks that way!” you smiled to yourself

  “OH MY GOD!!”

  “Alright, alright,” you laughed, “calm down before you break my eardrums!”

  “I’m sorry,” she giggled and you could imagine her bright smile on the other end of the phone, “I’m just so excited to see you”

  “Me too” you confessed

  “I miss you.”

xx

  It seemed like as soon as you moved to Toronto, things with Seth changed. Like the magic somehow disappeared and you two were just ships passing in the night. You two were only together there for about two months before he said he couldn’t do it anymore and you were left to find somewhere to live on your own; staying in hostels until an affordable apartment was available. You were miserable and you hated yourself for leaving the only safe place you had, with Freddie. A year passed and you were getting a little bit more comfortable in your new hometown, finding your own favourite spots and everything, when you got a random text from Freddie

  “Looks like I’ll be coming out your way” he sent and you furrowed your brow

  “What do you mean?”

  “I got traded... I’m coming to Toronto!” he replied and you couldn’t believe it. You had been in such a slump that you hadn’t been focusing on the Hockey world even though you made sure to follow Fred’s games, so you completely missed hearing about this trade. You weren’t sure about how he felt about it because he had made connections in Anaheim and moving to another city, again, was a lot to handle but that didn’t mean you weren’t happy that you would be able to see him again; to be around him and feel him near you.

  “YOU’RE COMING HERE?!” you yelled as soon as he picked up the phone

  “It looks that way!” he replied and you could hear the smirk on his face coming through. Oh how you missed that smirk

  “OH MY GOD!” you yelled once more, bouncing around at the idea of seeing your best friend again

  “Alright, alright,” he chuckled, “calm down before you break my eardrums!”

  “I’m sorry,” you laughed before inhaling calmly, “I’m just so excited to see you”

  “Me too” he said and your heart just about broke. You had always wished he’d say that he felt about you the way that you’d felt about him, that the love you had for him was reciprocated but you’d learned that holding your breath and waiting for him was as worthless a pursuit as ever

  “I miss you” you confessed, hoping he’d say it back but hung your head when he only mumbled something under his breath. You waited patiently for him at the airport, clutching the sign you’d made for him; his name in bold letters covered in glitter that you’d knew would embarrass him. “FREDDIE!!!!” you shouted when you saw him, running to him to jump on him like you did that day in Denmark, dropping your sign in the process

  “HEY!” he exclaimed, dropping his bags to wrap his arms around you, “it’s so good to see you. I’m so happy you’re here!”

  “I can’t believe you’re really here,” you smiled, keeping your legs tightly wrapped around his hips, “I thought I’d never get to hug you again”

  “I’m not going anywhere,” he laughed, “and if I do, I’m takin’ you with me”

  “Good”

  “So...” he sighed, putting you down gently and grabbing his bags, “where’s Seth?” His question made you realize you hadn’t told him about the breakup

  “Oh... right. We didn’t last,” you admitted, opening the car door as Freddie chucked his bags in the trunk, “lasted about two weeks.”

  “What?!” he returned as he slammed the trunk

  “Yeah.. he couldn’t deal so we ended things. But it was for the best...” you admitted

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked as he got into the passenger seat of your small car

  “I didn’t wanna bother you” you sighed

  “You can always bother me” he confessed and you squeezed his hand with yours before smiling softly at him

  “Thank you” you almost whispered and, just like that, the two of you picked up where you left off. Time went on, he had some bad games, the media tore him apart and you tried to be there for him but he yelled at you or whined that everything was falling apart; you told him to stop being so grumpy but he only growled in return. Everyday, it got a little harder to be with him without actually being with him. You were torturing yourself but you couldn’t stop yourself.

xx

Freddie’s P.O.V

  When Auston suggested you go to Arizona with him while everything was locked down, you asked if (Y/N) wanted to go with you

  “I can’t go with you, Freddie” she laughed

  “Why not?”

  “I wouldn’t want to interrupt... guy time” she joked

  “So you’re just gonna stay here? Alone?” you scoffed

  “Yes,” she admitted, “I have to work anyway. You’ll be back soon enough, I’m sure”

  “Yeah, maybe...” you sighed. Lockdown ended, the qualifiers started, the team didn’t make it through, rumours began to circulate and your relationship with (Y/N) was starting to fray again. You knew you would wait until she was ready, you’d wait a hundred years if you had to, but you needed to at least keep her close -- for fear that she might find another Seth. “Just move in here,” you insisted after finding out her lease was up just before Christmas, “I don’t think you’re gonna find a place during this pandemic”

  “I can’t move in here”

  “And why not?” you chuckled

  “I’ve lived with you before. I can’t really deal with the carousal of girls...”

  “There’s not a carousal of girls” you argued

  “There was in Anaheim” she scoffed

  “It’s different here. I’m different”

  “What if it doesn’t work?”

  “Then... you move out. No big deal...”

  “Why do you want me to move in?” she asked and you took a minute to think about your answer. Why did you want her to move in? So you could muster up enough courage to tell her you loved her. So she would finally realize her own feelings for you. So the two of you could finally be together the way you should’ve been a long time ago.

  “You’re my best friend” you finally said and it seemed to be enough. New Year’s passed and training camp started and neither of you had admitted any kind of feelings but her smile still made you weak.

  “Carla’s getting married in secret” she laughed, explaining how her friend from work hated the restrictions so much she was gathering a bunch of friends and family in the park for a ‘spur of the moment’ wedding

  “Is it really spur of the moment if she’s planning it?” you teased

  “Yes” she giggled

  “Okay” you laughed in response, watching as her eyes lit up as she talked about the details

  “So are you in?” you heard her ask

  “Hmm?” was all you could say since you had completely lost yourself in her

  “You’re gonna be my date, aren’t you? For the wedding?”

  “Uhh.. I don’t know,” you stammered, “when is it?”

  “I don’t know...” she huffed, “this weekend probably?” You could tell she was upset that you didn’t just agree to go, especially after she was so excited about it. Why couldn’t you just say, of course I’ll be your date!

  “I--”

  “I don’t wanna make you go if you don’t wanna go. Don’t feel like you have to, Freddie, just because I asked. You don’t owe me anything”

  “(Y/N), I want to. Of course I’ll go with you. I’m in!”

  “You are?” she questioned, clearly unsure of your answer

  “Always.”

xx

  April was a beautiful time to get married. In the park, as the grass was getting greener, as the birds sang in the trees high above and the sound of wind rustling through the trees was the only sound you could hear.

  “You look beautiful by the way” Freddie whispered to you while you sat, waiting for your friend to walk down the make-shift aisle she’d set up. You blushed at Freddie’s compliment before nudging his shoulder with yours and thanking him

  “You don’t look so bad yourself” you smiled

  “Why thank you!” he teased

  “Oh! Here we go” you exclaimed when the music began and Carla made her way to her soon-to-be husband. “She looks beautiful”

  “Are you crying already?” Freddie laughed

  “No... shut up” you scoffed as you admitted that you were, indeed, crying; you couldn’t help it, it was all so beautiful. Once the ceremony was done and they were officially married, Carla and her now husband, Clinton, invited everyone to their house for drinks and appetizers — their reception.

  “She’s trying to get us arrested” Freddie joked, referring to the quarantine rules that had to be reinforced the week prior

  “She wants to see how many of us will fit in a cell for sure” you added

  “As long as we manage to get drunk before they arrest us,” he smiled, “otherwise, it’s all for nothing.” The were no calls, no complaints, and the small group was allowed to celebrate as long and as loud as you wanted. You all did the obligatory chicken dance and cha-cha slide to really hone in on the ‘wedding vibes’ before eventually moving to slow dances. “Dance with me?” Freddie smiled at you with his hand palm up in front of you

  “I thought you’d never ask” you giggled, taking his hand and following him onto the open space that was being used as a dance floor

  “What I’ve been living for...” the song played in the background as you swayed with Freddie, pulling back to look at him once before he smiled at you.

  “What?” He chuckled

  “You’re just... I missed this” you hesitated

  “Have we danced at a wedding together before?” He joked, earning a playful scoff from you

  “I meant I miss us” you admitted, dropping your head onto his chest

  “I never went anywhere,” he said with a bite to his words, “you did.”

  “Freddie...” you furrowed your brow as you lifted your head off his chest, shaking your head as his hands moved away from you, “I didn’t... it’s not like that. I gave you—”

  “You gave me space. I didn’t need space, I didn’t want space” he sneered and you awkwardly smiled at the faces around you before pulling his arm

  “This is not the place for this”

  “You left, not me. You’re the one who stopped us from... having time together”

  “What?” you huffed, shaking your head in confusion, “I didn’t want to give you space, Fred, but you never did anything! You were so focused on Hockey and the life that you made in Anaheim that it didn’t matter how much I was there, you didn’t have time for me. I got the message. I found someone and, yes, I left to try to make it work with him. It didn’t. And now you’re here, and you’re arguing with me because of... what?”

  “What do you mean I never did anything??” it was all he focused on and you could only laugh in response

  “I gave you every chance to do something. I moved across the world for you and you never did anything”

  “NEITHER DID YOU!” he yelled, veins beginning to pop out of his neck

  “I WANTED YOU TO DO SOMETHING FIRST!”

  “WHY?!?!”

  “BECAUSE I DIDN’T KNOW HOW YOU FELT AND I DIDN’T WANT TO EMBARRASS MYSELF OR RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP!”

  “YEAH WELL... I DIDN’T KNOW THAT” he yelled before clearing his throat and calming himself down. “How ‘bout I tell you now?” he said softly as you trained your eyes on his face, “your smile is the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I see when I go to sleep. The smell of your shampoo and your body lotion mix together and I can smell coconut and vanilla for weeks on end without it being anywhere close to me. I hated seeing you with... anyone else because you weren’t with me but I wanted you to be happy. I don’t know how long I’ve loved you but I know that I’m not the same without you. Without you around. Without you with me, near me, beside me, sharing everything with me, dancing with me, laughing with me. You have no idea how many times I wish I would’ve done something sooner, taken charge of my feelings and just told you how I felt — because I should’ve — but I was scared. I just hoped that you’d say it first so that I could hug you and kiss you and finally call you mine” he finally finished his proclamation and you were left completely speechless. “So...” he smirked, having just laid his heart out in front of you, “what do you have to say?”

  “I’m not a possession...” you mumbled

  “What?”

  “I didn’t know you could be so sweet,” you smiled, feeling a warmness in your chest, “I mean I knew you were a big teddy bear but I didn’t know you could be... this sweet” you repeated. “I love you, too, Freddie. I don’t know for how long either but I know that hearing what you said just now, after all this time, was exactly what I needed to tell you how much I love you. How whenever I hear your voice, my heart melts and my body buzzes or how whenever I see your smile I mentally take as many pictures as I can because I don’t know when you’ll let me see it again willingly. I tried to replace you with other people because I never thought you’d ever want me but now here you are, in front of me, saying the sweetest words I’ve ever heard and I’ve never loved you more” you took a breath and waited for him to say something else when you noticed the corners of his lips turn up into a smile before he walked toward you

  “I love you” he placed his hands on the sides of your neck, brushing his thumbs against your cheeks before he leaned down and connected his lips to yours; finally, was all you could think.

  “I love you, too” you smiled when he finally broke the kiss, trailing your hands up his arms to rest them on his shoulders. “I can’t believe it took you two continents, three countries and 22 years to do something”

  “Guess I just needed a push” he whispered against your lips as he moved to pick you up, wrapping his arms under your butt and bringing your chest as close to him as possible

  “I guess so” you whispered back, your hands lingering on his neck until your fingers found his hair, “better late than never.”

[theodora3022]

Party Sickness(Tamaki x F!reader)

Pairing: Tamaki Amajiki x F!Reader

Summary: Tamaki? Party? No one in their right minds would put those two words the same sentence. But a career as a pro hero requires certain amount of socialising, which includes attending events such as celebration parties. “Social training” has many draw backs, but it also made him realize how wonderful it can be to be by your side.

Notes: The reader is single, and they are both in third year of UA. This is for this collab by @ilikemaruchan​ .I never participated in one before, so I am kind of nervous...Anyway this is inspired by a song! There might be a little Fire emblem three houses reference, but nothing major. I started doing work counts because it gives me a sense of accomplishment haha--

Special thanks to @drownedbytears​ for proof reading this!

Word count:1.5k

Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated! 

I don’t care by Ed Sheeran

Warnings: Social anxiety, fluff. May or may not be self-indulgent.

I am to blame. Tamaki silently cursed himself for being so easily convinced. Should have just stayed at home and have regular dinner, instead of this. So many people, so many things unknown...Why are they so loud? Would it hurt to enjoy each other’s presence quietly? And why is the room so cold?!

He should have never said yes to Mirio and Nejire. But Tamaki always got a damned soft spot for his friends ‘pleading puppy eyes.

“Just this once...please Tamaki? You would need to go to events as a pro hero, you know.”

Nejire’s periwinkle eyes.

“Think of this as a special training session! It can be social training for the future.”

Mirio’s ocean blue eyes.

Those incidents resulted him trailing behind Mirio in a crowded party room at eight p.m., unsure how to behave or even where to look. Tamaki was never the one for casual conversations, let alone a situation such as this. He is sure that Mirio has the best intentions, trying to transform his secluded caterpillar-cocoon shy friend into a social butterfly. That courage alone deserves admiration. However, there is no hope for him. Tamaki learned that lesson long ago. He thought being one of the big three would make socialising easier, oh was he so wrong. No matter how hard he tries, he can never find the right thing to say. A problem Mirio or Nejire never seem to have nor understand. As the two shining social stars of third year, they are known for their approachable, cheerful personalities.

“Man, you alright?” Snapping his attention back to reality from the butterfly encyclopedia in his memory, Tamaki was greeted by Mirio’s concerned eyes. “Are you feeling unwell? Did you eat something upsetting your stomach?” It is very kind of Mirio to express worries, but Tamaki prefer to be alone right now. All this noise and people are taking tolls on his frail energy. Quick, think of a reasonable exit strategy Amajiki. You can at least do this, and this thirty-minute suffering can end temporarily.

Excusing himself to the washroom, Tamaki finally got some tranquil alone time beside the sink. Why? Why can’t I do this? Why can’t I be as lively as Nejire or Mirio? They made it seem so easy, just walk up to strangers with their big smiles. Bam they are friends after fifteen minutes. Splashing some cold tap water onto his face, to hopefully clear his mind, Tamaki sighed. Why he cannot spit out a sentence without stuttering? Maybe there is indeed something wrong with him, there is no other explanation.

After five minutes of inner struggle, Tamaki decides to give this special training a try. He would leave Mirio and strike up conversations with some of the friendly people he knew from classes. Certainly one or two of them would want to talk to him, right?

Mirio seems surprised, but he is happy for Tamaki’s bold decisions, nevertheless. “Man, you’re going to do great! Remember to look into their eyes, most of them won’t bite.” Eye contact?? So they can see any emotion you have? Why would he expose himself like that?

I want to go home...No, Tamaki, you are going to give this your all. This once you are not going to flee like a coward. There must be someone who is willing to talk.

That is when he notices you, in a corner chair, sipping on juice, zoning out. You do not seem happy to be here, at least you two have that in common? He has seen you in varies school activities before. Although you are in a different class of hero course, Tamaki recalls you being quite strong.

“Amajiki? What brings you here? I never saw you at any social event before.”

You talked to him, that is a good start. That means he do not have to imitate any conversation. “Mirio brought me here, he said this is part of being a hero.”

When your eyes widen with surprise, Tamaki started to panic. What-what did he do wrong? Is it because he was staring at the ground all the time? Or is it because he stuttered? Oh wait he did not even stutter, that is a first. Or is he just being a nuisance? Readying himself to apologize and leave, Tamaki is prepared to go bury himself under blankets once he escapes this situation.

What almost startled him to death is how you extended your hand to him, smiling so warmly. “Well, need some help? I imagine Togata wants you to have some other friends.” Setting the juice glass aside, you stood up and stretched. Unknown to Tamaki, you actually had been noticing him for a while. But he always seems so timid, as if he would faint any moment. You never imagined, even in your wildest dreams, that the ravenette would be the one to initiate anything, let it be friendship or otherwise.

Conveniently, a song suited for slow dancing has started to play. “Care to join me in a dance, Amajiki?” How he fervently blushes and tries to look away is so endearing, you could not help but be amused. Keeping your chuckles quiet, you offered him your palm again.

A girl asking him to dance. It was usually Mirio who receives this kind of offers, while Tamaki envies beside. It is not that he WANTS attention desperately, sometimes you just want a bit of admiration to remind your self-worth.

So when the opportunity presents itself, Tamaki knows he got to take it. He had never seen you humiliate anyone before, nor did he hear any rumors about you bullying anyone, so what is the harm in placing a little faith? It is a risk he is willing to take. Just like trying new food for his quirk, no risk no gain.

So he nods, slowly placing his long fingers on top of yours.

Your hands are so warm...have they always been? Such a nice contrast to this freezing room. “Are you cold? Here, you can have my jacket.” (color) cloth wrapped around him tightly, chasing the chilliness away. Tamaki has never...been this close to a girl before (besides Nejire and his family members).

“(y/n)?” “Yes, Amajiki?” You let out a gleeful giggle, placing your hands back into his.

“I-I cannot dance. I got two left feet, I would only step on your toes.” Call me Tamaki, please. That he did not have the courage to say out loud.

“That’s fine! We do not have to. As a matter of fact, I am not a skilled dancer myself. Thank you for sparing me the trouble.” You let out a relived sigh, still holding onto his hand, not that he minds, but Tamaki knows he is going to get more then an earful from Mirio if he saw this.

Strangely, Tamaki do not feel intimidated by the packed room anymore. As if you are a wonderful filter for those awful noises, he cannot hear them if he does not pay full attention.

“Call me Tamaki.” Whispering under his breath, the shy boy gripped your hands a bit tighter. “What was that? Why is your face so red? Are you feeling sick?” Your innocent eyes, like two pools of clear lake in the summer, makes him feel this urge, to jump in and soak himself well.

Clenching his teeth, he almost screamed out the words: “Call me Tamaki please!” Several other of your fellow students turned because the sudden sharp sounds, but you just smiled, waving signaling nothing is off. Leading him to a relatively secluded corner of the room, you noticed how he is trembling. Poor boy, you thought. So nervous about talking to me. “There is nothing to be afraid of. I won’t get mad at anything you say.” You were never a judgemental person; all you want to do seeing him so afraid is wanting to cherish him like the treasure boy he is.

Settling Tamaki on a couch, you sit down beside his shivering form with worries in your eyes. This adjacent room is nearly empty, yet he is still like this...How to fix this?

You are so kind, so warm-hearted, why hasn’t he found you sooner? Now he knows you will never judge him for his stutters or bad questions, Tamaki can finally let loose, to let his true feelings run wild.

Tamaki is drawn to you. This strange new feeling left him feeling both frightened and excited, not sure which is more dominant. When you are near him, he can ignore the rest of the room, even if they are one of the things that scares him the most- strangers.

To be perfectly honest, Tamaki never noticed you before. He hopes you do not take offense since he never really notices anyone besides the professors and his two friends. But he knows you are modest and hardworking from the sport festivals.

So...why can’t he accept you as another friend? Surely these social events would be more bearable with you around. But first.

“Would you like to get out of here? I’ll text Mirio that I am feeling ill.”

“I would love that, Tamaki-san.”