#I don't think it is spoilers because the comments are confused towards the context and it is a deleted scene

[twptwp]

That one Patapon 3 deleted scene

[mediaevalmusereads]

If We Were Villains. By M. L. Rio. Flatiron Books, 2017.

Rating: 3.5/5 stars

Genre: thriller

Series: N/A

Summary: Oliver Marks has just served ten years in jail - for a murder he may or may not have committed. On the day he's released, he's greeted by the man who put him in prison. Detective Colborne is retiring, but before he does, he wants to know what really happened a decade ago.

As one of seven young actors studying Shakespeare at an elite arts college, Oliver and his friends play the same roles onstage and off: hero, villain, tyrant, temptress, ingenue, extra. But when the casting changes, and the secondary characters usurp the stars, the plays spill dangerously over into life, and one of them is found dead. The rest face their greatest acting challenge yet: convincing the police, and themselves, that they are blameless.

***Full review below.***

Content Warnings: violence, misogyny, suicide, blood

Overview: I followed the author of this book on tumblr way back in the day while she was blogging about her writing journey. To be honest, I didn't have a strong opinion about her one way or the other, but I found the premise of her book intriguing. As a lover of premodern and early modern English literature, I figured I should give the finished product a whirl. Well, I finally was in the mood. Overall, my opinions on this book are a little mixed, but leaning towards positive. While I do think Rio does a good job creating a Dark Academia atmosphere and the emotional devastation of the last half of the book was well-executed, I think her characters and prose leave a little something to be desired. Still, for a debut novel, this was fairly memorable, so it gets 3.5 stars from me.

Writing: Rio's prose has its ups and downs, with some parts flowing quite well and others not so much. When the scenes were full of action (for example, the Macbeth performance and the Julius Caesar rehearsal afterwards), I was fairly engrossed in the story, so I think Rio does best when there are moments of tension inserted into performances or just after (like at various parties).

However, I also think Rio could have done more to show rather than tell. Because this book is told in first person, our narrator, Oliver, tends to be very straightforward about what he is feeling as well as side comments about background or context info. Personally, I felt like Rio could have held back a little more or been more abstract about how characters were feeling and acting.

Furthermore, I had some mixed feelings about using Shakespeare quotes as dialogue. Looking at the author's note in the back, it seems like Rio took this quirk from real-life grad students she knew at King's College. So while I don't doubt that some people do this, in a novel, it comes across less as realistic and more as pretentious. Maybe that's the point; after all, most of these characters aren't "good guys" and Oliver does say at one point that the school felt like a cult. But for me, I couldn't quite determine if Rio was deliberately creating a pretentious atmosphere to heighten the Dark Academic mood or if she was simply showing off her knowledge of Shakespeare's works. Either way, I felt the quotes a bit over-used and would have preferred if they were sprinkled in less liberally.

Overall, though, I did like the pace and the ease at which I could move through the novel. I was able to read this book fairly quickly, and things were straightforward enough that I never felt confused or lost.

Characters: There are a number of characters in this book, but I'm going to focus on the 7 protagonists, just to keep things brief (ish).

Plot: The plot of this book follows fourth-year theater student Oliver Marks as he and his classmates defend themselves from a bully while putting on Julius Caesar at their exclusive, elite arts school. (Obviously, it's a little more complicated than that, but I'm trying to avoid major spoilers).

This book is strongest in the second half when all the students grow more and more tormented by their actions and begin fracturing. Rio does a fairly good job of showing how characters began acting irrationally, and in a lot of ways, their descent mirrors some of Shakespeare's works.

I also thing the devastation of the end worked out well, and it was heightened by the emotional tension between Oliver and James. I do want to caution readers that if you're sensitive to the depiction of deaths of queer characters, you should skip this book. But personally, I found it somewhat fitting given the subject matter and the thematic connections to Shakespeare's works.

The main part of the plot that I didn't think flowed well was the beginning. The beginning was a little awkward in that Rio spoon feeds us a lot of information: characters narrate their family situations one after another, like Rio just wanted to get it out of the way. On top of that, there is a scene where one of the instructors interrogates a student until they disclose their greatest strength and greatest insecurity. To me, this seemed a lazy way to communicate characterization, and it almost soured me on the rest of the novel.

As a unit, I really did like the idea of these 7 characters essentially standing in for archetypes. I think it meshed with the themes of the book fairly well, and I liked the easy companionship that a lot of them had. I also liked that their relationships were often messy, especially during the second half of the book; it made them more interesting and when they began to break down, it felt all the more chaotic.

As individuals, however, I think things get a little murky.

Oliver, our narrator, is somewhat of a blank slate in that he doesn't seem to have a very defined personality, but maybe that's the point. He's stereotyped as the "support" or even the "nice guy," and there were times when I could see that shine through. He does seem to care about his friends and does admit to being naive, so I don't want to give the impression that he's entirely without merit. The main thing I didn't like about him was his attitude towards his sister, who has an eating disorder. He's not very considerate of her, and while I can understand being upset that his future at school is financially threatened by her, he snaps at her and says some pretty awful things. He also seems to characterize his family as awful, and while I understand the negativity there, compared to other characters, he has somewhat of a normal suburban middle class family. His whining about them, then, felt entitled.

James, Oliver's roommate and best friend, is stereotyped as a heroic figure, and I could see some of that come out in his actions. What I liked most about James, however, was his relationship with Oliver; the two are best friends, but there are times when their closeness tipped over into homoerotic and romantic intimacy. I enjoyed the tension there, and it did make for a more devastating ending.

Meredith, who is figured as the temptress, could have been written with a little more grace. While I think it's ok that Meredith exists as a sexual woman who is anxious about people overlooking her as a person, it also seems like the narrative does just that, at least until the midpoint of the novel. I very much did not appreciate the misogynistic comments thrown her way, even if they were partially in jest. Her character grew on me more in the second half, though, so she wasn't all bad.

Wren and Philippa are a little harder to define. Wren, I think, is supposed to be the ingenue, but it was hard to see that in the way she was written. Philippa is described as someone who is always overlooked, and I think parts of the narrative do a good job of showing moments when she has a great impact. As individual characters, however, I felt like there wasn't much to distinguish them.

Alexander is a character who is always typecast as (I think) a fool, and off stage, he seems to be mainly defined by his excessive smoking, drinking, and gay sexuality. I didn't quite know how to react to him, in part because his hedonism felt repetitive, but his drug use in the second half made some sense, given all that was going on.

Richard, the "bully," was interesting in that he was simultaneously loved and hated. I liked that the other characters had a complex relationship with him; they agreed he was a phenomenal actor but also loathed his ego. They see him as part of their group and as a friend, but also frequently argue with him. Having this complexity meant that I couldn't quite see him purely as an antagonist, and I like living in that delicious grey area.

TL;DR: If We Were Villains suffers from a few missteps (mainly prose and some characterization), but is rescued by the deft handling of a friend group's ultimate descent into madness. While I think Rio could have done some things to reduce the appearance of pretense and more solidly set up the exposition of the novel, this was a fairly solid debut that delivered an emotional punch towards the end.

[iviarellereads]

Wheel of Time full series spoiler thoughts on TDR 15-19

A probably semi-regular weekly bonus to my reread blog, since sometimes you realize things on reread that just make you need to yell in a full spoiler space.

We never really get much more answer on Gray Men, do we? Huh. They stay in the story longer than, say, portal stones, but they also sort of just fizzle out after a certain point, particularly once the gholam is free. (I'm not qualified to talk about THAT one but it's a ways off yet, at least, so I'm saved from having to comment. Hurrah.)

"How will they see us as a threat? Nobody is threatened by someone they can order about. Nobody is threatened by someone who has to scrub pots and turn the spits three times a day." Egwene, how far you have to go before you realize that everything, EVERYTHING is about context.

Sheriam used air to hide the Gray Man's body… Is this where Nyn gets the idea for a mask of mirrors? Do we think Sheriam learned that weave from the Dark?

Oh, Elayne, what misery you've wrought for all the rest of us readers. Okay, I know that SOME people legit ship Egwene and Gawyn, but still.

I'm gonna give a real controversial take here: poor Elaida. Look, does she interpret everything through a lens of "I have to be in control of this situation because I'm obviously the person who understands the most of it"? Yes. But, have you ever had a control complex out of anxiety that your lack of control will mean disaster? Cause, I do. I constantly have to fight that shit. Elaida is never motivated by evil and only rarely by greed for power and influence, only as much so as she needs to accomplish her goal of being the one to save the world, of being the one in control of everything. Left to fester, there's a chance she'd end up something like Mordeth, like Mashadar, corrosive to Light and Dark. And her end in the series is downright tragic. The woman whose anxiety over her visions drives her to control the world, under the control-slavery of the a'dam. I think her offer here is true, I think she really does want to help them. She's just such a domineering presence, she has never bothered to learn how to schmooze, to charm, to persuade as a first resort., when the bullish charge will do the job more often than not, when you're one of the most powerful Aes Sedai in hundreds of years.

And Mat's finally healed. Time for him to become one of my active annoyances. Yeah, I'm the outlier. I've never liked him, I'm not sure I ever will proper like him. The show's gone a long way to making me understand him better and tolerate some of his bullshit, I'm curious how they'll go with him… but Han Solo types are never terribly endearing to me. It IS interesting that he said he's no Aes Sedai meat/puppet in his Old Tongue ravings though. He does maintain that perhaps even more strongly than Rand at times throughout the series.

I do have to say though, I think it was a mistake to try to lean old blood and then pivot into Finn memories. It's too confusing as to the origin of the memories and their purpose and meaning in the story. I don't know how the show's going to handle it, but it seems they're leaning toward his Hero-ness being the cause of the memories, which means that if they're doing the Finn for Moiraine's arc, they'll need another anchor in Mat. I wonder how that'll be worked out…

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

And the thing is your writing can have a lot of fans, and those fans can stick around your personal account just because they like you as a person, but it still takes thousands upon thousands of followers before you get someone talkative or brave enough to actually just approach you. To everyone else you are just some guy and no one really cares or is too busy being respectfully quiet. You have to be like a publishing house published author or close to it, before I see anyone submitting regular asks.

Derin writes a lot of really addictive free stories that are very well received, but that's not the same thing as being a 'celebrity' in the way you are probably thinking.

Like think about the difference in type and volume of fan mail between even a very popular author like Neil and an acting/personality celebrity like idk if Megan Fox was on tumblr, or like T swift.

The well known author is primarily going to get questions about their work, and a lot of that is curiosity about plans and when fans can expect stuff. When you have an open policy about your release schedule online and there's no confusion about whether you are in charge or if you have to work around other people [directors actors producers restrictions schedules etc...], there stops being questions. The story goes up when I say it does, I am doing it at my pace, I'm not giving spoilers. Done.

Further scale that down to just releasing a handful of free stories online. Divide that by however thousands less follower you have than Neil fricking Gaiman... Even if the stories are very good, and even if you are relatively tumblr popular, and even if you constantly write chapters that make people chew their walls... Other than "DERIN WHY?" What's more to say or ask about that you aren't either already posting about, or are assumed to want to keep private because you aren't already posting about it. Either you over share and no one wants you to keep talking, or you don't and people assume you want privacy.

You are also assumed to be a private individual and not have a team, people don't expect you to -act- like a 'celebrity' here even if you are one, because you are just some guy. Even if you are Neil, you are also just a guy on tumblr.

I know Derin is way more popular than me as a writer, and does more original work, and actually releases new chapters, lol, but for context... I thought that writing a popular fic and releasing a well liked original story and getting up to 1000 followers would at LEAST get me some hate mail, I was ready for it... But no. If I get hate mail it's from someone I know, or it's over some random fandom comment, and even then it's less than once a year... And about once a year I get a friendly ask. I never even get a tumblr ask about my story here or about my story on AO3 here on tumblr... even though my first jump to any real number of followers was FOR the story I started here. I know why I don't now, but I didn't when it was new and updating weekly either. People here are really reserved compared to other sites until you attract like TERFS or something.

Say that's roughly the math on tumblr right? Say for every story you have up online and/or every 1k followers you get an average small number of positive asks, and one hate mail/chain per year, Like that is very manageable. Say I am an outlier and people get 3-20 times that plus what their friends and a server of very dedicate fans send in because they are friendly and fun, and say they actually update their shit, and say they actually have a lot of friends, and say I get a lower amount of feedback on tumblr because I write smut, and most my comments come in on AO3 which has it's own mail system, and people comment less on smut in general... I am still betting the average amount of fan mail a tumblr native writer gets per work or per 1000 followers per year is a very manageable number. Say the 200 or so mail I got on AO3 over 5 years is counted towards tumblr too... Still manageable, still less than one fan mail per day [or per week or month], including anon/hate.

Even if Derin was/is a micro celebrity by a reasonable definition, they still would probably have a reasonable amount of fan mail that was mostly rhetorical "what the fuck Derin?" and it would feel less like being a celebrity and more like leading a weekly lecture hall where you read a fucked up scifi story out loud... I mean, a perfectly normal scifi story where nothing fucked up happens ever, of course... And once in a while everyone yells "what the fuck?" and then sits there and listens for more. They aren't here for you as like TV personality, not for more than you already freely share, they are here to be read to, basically.

I'd actually love every tumblr writer big and small to post their follower count vs amount of mail vs number of works, perhaps using 2-3 anonymous polls, so I could run an average to tell people what they should be ready for -roughly- as their readership goes up. I don't have a lot of data and I would like more data on this. [Neil do you like tumblr for it's chill vibes?]

Because I was expecting more social drain from relentless asks here too, because I was expecting it to be like deviant art where I'd have a hard time keeping up and get anxiety about not responding to everyone. [and of course you can tamp down on feedback by simply not creating art!]

Even John Green, poor John Green of "cock monologue" fame who we were horrible to and bullied off the site has come back to say "Hey I'm back here and wow so tumblr is the chill site actually huh?"

I think the threshold here is like at some point between 100k and a million followers that actually adds up to a full mail box all of the time with more pouring in, Like we are talking popular or Published by a publishing house -outside of tumblr- and people finding out you have a tumblr... But between 1-30k followers at least, it's still pretty chill from what I can tell, even if a lot of people would consider 1-10k followers 'popular' on here, or over 10k a celebrity. Everyone I see here publishing regular asks or who I get the impression really has to be detached about answering fan comments, they all are celebrities outside of tumblr [except maybe Gaud or Turing tested, like the truly big tumblr names that have been here since the beginning, the TV personality celebrities of tumblr, if you will].

Off of tumblr this might be very different just because of the different social norms on other sites, and I am going to bet a lot of it on other sites is asking questions just to have something nice to say or bitchy comments from strangers, because other sites tend to have a culture of lots of low stakes quick comments that don't require much investment, and where everyone is expected to have -and voice- an opinion about everything all of the time.

On tumblr I answer hate mail with patience and a sense of play because it is the only enrichment in my enclosure.

All that to say, Derin you -might- be a minor tumblr celebrity writer, it's just kind of quiet here.

I'm glad my tumblr isn't a lot more popular because I see the garbage asks that some of the very popular artists on this webbed site get and they answer them so clearly and patiently whereas my immediate response to those sorts of asks is usually "are you stupid?"

I don't have the patience or the kindness to handle a large following, it attracts nonsense and popular artists are saints.

[endoftheworldhere]

Thank you for inviting me to your tumblr :) As you know, I'm desperately trying to avoid the actual books, both for "spoilers" (since I'm basically reading your story like one would any novel) and because it's one thing to start a story then a character you like dies. It's another to go into it knowing your favourite character will die - and I'm not sure I can do that lol. I suppose it also depends how much Jordie is actually in the book(s). Given y'all have a whole tag about him living, I'm leaning towards he's in there enough to be loved. But, hey, like I said, there's a whole character in one of my fandoms who is beloved and has the equivalent of a "Jordie lives" tag and he's based off 1 line, soo….. But I'm still tempted because I like your story so much (and I kinda maybe have a fic idea… <.< >.>) Although, I will read the wiki if I end up getting hopelessly confused.

I do have 1 question: I've assumed my guess on Kaz's identity is correct, bc it just makes too much sense not to be. Does he have a redemption arc in the books? Or is he just bad/morally grey? Or is my question itself wrong because I'm missing too much context? I don't know if I could do both "my favourite character is going to die and I know this before ever interacting with the source material" AND "my other favourite character went 'evil'/cruel/maybe a bit psychopath not really sure and stays that way" - especially not if they're introduced as young children (which I'm assuming they are lol, lot of assumptions here).

Buuut, I also recently found out that the Six of Crows books aren't the first ones? So maybe I could read the Shadow and Bones trilogy and not have to deal with those things? Just to get a flavour of the canon world. And then I also saw that there's some companion books, like the one on the saints - which sounds interesting, but I would probably find infuriating, given what you've written of the Church in your story ROFL - and the one with in-world fairy tales - THAT sounds really good. I might do that one even if I don't ever give the actual canon stuff a try.

You're welcome! I love reading your comments and answering your questions.

Jordie has a decent presence in the books for what his role is--we have a couple of flashback chapters that were the basis for the first two chapters of a guest and Kaz continues to remember him/imagine his presence. Enough to get a decent sense of who he was, I think (though of course fandom loves to run wild with the scraps of characterization we get as a general rule)

As for Kaz--you're right about his identity (probably pretty obvious from the tags in retrospect, since his name on Ao3 is Kaz Brekker) and in the books he is a main character/narrator. You have to remember that the information you got last chapter wasn't really coming from the most reliable sources-a lot of it was rumor and gossip and trying to shock/scare Jordie--Kaz is complicated, but not a villain, and better than he likes to think he is.

You can certainly read Shadow and Bone if you want and it'll help you understand the world but it's...it's got a lot of cool concepts and interesting side characters and the Netflix adaptation is fantastic but the books themselves were some of Bardugo's first published work and it kind of shows. They're very much of the early-mid 2010s YA (I think I read them in 2015?). If your taste goes that way, I say go for it, but otherwise I would just recommend watching the Netflix series to get a primer on the world/characters. I haven't read the tie-in stuff myself but if it's recent it's probably pretty good.

If you do have a fic idea though I'd love to hear about it because this fandom has consumed my life for like the past several years and is one of the few things keeping me sane through law school lol :D

[ilomilodailystuff]

If You Love Me || Sylki Fanfic

...really love me

Loki x Sylvie fanfiction

[LOKI FINALE SPOILERS]

dt @entertainmentforgods

(every mean comments about this ship will be deleted. If you don't like this ship, please just ignore.)

They did it, it was over. The impossible had come true.

Their heart beating wildly, the anguish of their uncertainty gradually fades as they understand the finality of it all.

Loki and Sylvie had joined forces to destroy the true mastermind of the TVA. The overpowered individual who pulled the strings behind the curtain.

The Goddess of Mischief dropped her bloodstained sword on the dark ground, making a loud metallic sound. He Who Remains had just gave his last breath.

Sylvie took a deep breath while staring at the inert body of the one who called himself The Conqueror. As Loki stood behind her, he watched her worriedly. She had just accomplished what she had fought for all her life. So many years feeding a justified anger towards one man, for it turned out that the Time Keepers were nothing but a sham. So many years of hiding, of surviving in the midst of so many apocalypses instead of just living fearlessly. Instead of living happily, instead of laughing, smiling, dancing, singing, enjoying the present moment, observing the universe and its many wonders without them being destroyed around her, loving and being loved in return... All of that was taken away from her, because The Ruler had decided to do so. Because only one man had made the decision to sacrifice her timeline and her family and those she loved. She had lost everything as a child, because a human had condemned her existence.

And now, the latter had just died. He had lived millions of lives, and the last had just ended, killed by the vengeful hand of an innocent orphan.

Slowly, Loki moved closer to her as he kept his eyes on her. Then when he was right behind her, he gently took her hand to try to get her out of her torpor. Her face turned to him as her gaze was drawn to the ground. She was still trying to regulate her breathing and realize the previous events.

"Come with me…" He half-murmurs, his blue eyes tinted with green watching his partner's reaction carefully, anxious to see her breaking down despite her strength to contain her emotions.

It was then that she nodded softly, still too absorbed by this decisive moment in her life. Sylvie turns to him with the intention of following him, no matter where he wanted to take her.

A few seconds later, both found themselves outside the entrance to the Citadel.

Loki went down the few steps, before sitting quietly on one of them. His teammate was not far away and she watched him get comfortable, while thousands of thoughts jostled in her mind. Curious, Loki brought his attention to her. When their eyes met, she began her steps to him to sit beside him on the step.

A deep sigh escaped her lips as she sat down comfortably, her eyes fixed in front of her, finally noticing the awe-inspiring beauty of the sacred timeline they both would have admired sooner if it were in a less disastrous context. But now as they ran after time, it was as if it has just stopped.

The variants observed this painting before them, this masterpiece born from space and the end of the universe. For a moment, a pleasant silence rocked them in a surreal dream. Their eyes shine brightly, illuminated by the cosmos and time materialised in a perfectly fluid and sparkling line. But also, their intense feelings took over and tears had formed.

Hesitant but at the same time strangely confident, Loki turned to Sylvie, only able to imagine how she felt now.

"You're okay ?" He dares to ask softly.

Suffering of an internal conflict, Sylvie keeps her eyes wide open and try to look indifferent.

"I accomplished my mission, how do you think I feel ?" She replies naturally, almost on the defensive.

"Relieved ?"

"Yeah, among other things." She confirms with obviousness.

Amused by her slightly aggressive responses which, according to him, are what make her what she is, the god of mischief ends up stretching a tender smirk, realizing that this tone will never leave her no matter the situations in which they find themselves, as dramatic and catastrophic as they may be.

Innocently, Sylvie ends up looking at her partner.

"Why do you smile ?" She asks.

He smiles a little more.

"The real question is... why don’t you ?" Loki retorts, eyebrows raised.

The Enchantress raised her eyebrows in turn, that desperate, lonely look that makes her charm appearing on her face. What to answer to that? She had learned that Loki was insightful about her, but she wasn't used to being the center of attention that much.

"Why seek answers to trivial questions." She asks rhetorically as she looks away from him.

After a while, Loki also turned away, dissatisfied with her answer but still preferring to let go.

"So this is it..." He starts. "It's done."

"It's done." Sylvie asserts, nodding her head a little.

His eyes going here and there, Odin's son was asking himself lots of questions. Including one in particular.

"What do we do now ?" He wonders, seeming lost.

Sylvie took a deep breath again, ignoring like him the future of events.

"Should we go back to the TVA ?" Loki continues, bringing his gaze back to the one person he trusted.

"Why ?" She asks softly. "They don't need us anymore."

"But we don't have to hide." He responds with a comforting smile. "We are their allies."

"Is that what you want, to go back to the TVA ? But to do what ?" She asks again, looking into his eyes.

He thought for a moment, trying to unravel this enigmatic knot, stepping into the unknown.

"The Sacred Timeline is free" He said, emphasizing the first words in an exaggerated and caricatural way. "Maybe once we get there, we can look for another timeline where we can... fit in ?"

A silence took hold of them, leaving for only words the looks they exchanged.

Sylvie then ends up lowering her gaze in the direction of her own hands, revealing between her fingers the object that the Conqueror kept around his hand. The tempad.

"How about we take a break, until one of us finds a place to go ?" She offers softly, lost in thought as she doesn't take her eyes off the object.

"What, here ?" Loki asks, uncertain and surprised by her answer.

"Why not..?" She replies, her eyebrows raised, her mind being elsewhere. "When you've seen thousands of apocalypses, The Void isn't as bad as it seems."

Loki takes the time to consider this idea, thinking about everything else. The members of the TVA, the sacred timeline that has become completely independent, the very few people to which he is attached. They had just accomplished something huge, should they just ignore the multitudes of consequences their act caused ?

"It's over, Loki." Sylvie said, looking up at him.

Again, his gaze plunged deeply into her eyes

"We did what we had to do." She continues, looking serene.

"What if they still need us ?" He asks, referring to the TVA, specifically Mobius and hunter B-15, the only two people who believed in them and offered their precious help.

Sylvie watched the sacred timeline as it gradually divided, and she sighed.

"I am tired." She admits, ignoring Loki's question. "And you ?"

Loki admired the many timelines that continued to split, before taking a deep breath.

"Yes, me too..." He answers softly, releasing his breath, releasing the pressure he had been holding since his arrival at the TVA and which he hadn't known he had kept in him all this time until now.

However, he couldn't shake off his negative thoughts and all his apprehensions about the completion of their mission and the impact it will have on the trillions of people the universe can create. The god of mischief had, against all odds, developed a conscience and a moral code. Yes, they had delivered the world by giving it back its free will. But for some reason that he didn't quite understand, he began to doubt.

And buried into his torment, Sylvie brought a comforting hand to his.

Loki laid his eyes on this delicate hand, yet belonging to that of a warrior, his heart missing a beat at the gentle contact of the one he had become crazy about. In this moment of complexity, in this major turning point for the multiverse, he almost forgot his feelings. He almost forgot the way they looked at each other in the Citadel as they walked into the darkness. He almost forgot the moment she had gripped his hand in the Void, in front of Alioth, hoping to help him unleash his enchantment powers.

Suddenly caught up in his emotions, he looked up uncertainly in the direction of his partner. Then, she gave him a brief smile, but oh so genuine. The same smile she had given him on Lamentis, while everything around them was death and destruction. Apparently everything was written. But he decided to ignore this detail that the conqueror had shared with too much pride.

Still confused by these unusual feelings, Loki returned that affectionate and heartwarming smile. Only, looking into her expressive eyes - but in the greatest secret, a loving gaze- he realized that the very thing he wanted above all now was to never leave her again. To stay by her side, as long as possible, even forever, better than that : beyond death. His desires made him all the more nervous. He never thought he would be so consumed by his moods, let alone by a loving emotion that possesses him more and more after each day he spends in her company. Nevertheless he wanted to seize this desire and make it come true.

This time, it is the TVA that he forgets, it is the universe that he neglect, it is the time that he ignores.

It is his glorious purpose that he gave up, because he found a new one...

"Sylvie..." He said, drunk with love for her. "I..."

"No, Loki, wait." Sylvie interrupts him, being totally lost and frightened at the same time. "I have to tell you something..."

"Yes ?" He asks, innocent, patient, in love.

She looked at him intensely, trying to express herself. Something seemed to upset her. Loki was trying to read into her eyes, to read her face, when no word could break the barrier of her lips. Disturbed by this confession, it turned out that it was getting stuck between the walls of her throat.

So the Prince of Asgard frowned, intrigued by the torture she was inflicting on herself through this mysterious revelation.

"I..." She starts before her lips instantly seal.

She took a deep breath, bracing herself for another attempt, as Loki's piercing, loving gaze dug into her pupils until it consumed her whole being.

When finally, in complete disarray, she ends up throwing herself at his neck.

Her lips crashed against his, tenderly, passionately but mostly timidly. Surprised but more than grateful for this proof of unexpected love, Loki was not long in returning her kiss with just as much fervor.

Sylvie had never been attached to anyone. She never wanted to be weak because of her feelings. She would never have dedicated herself to someone body and soul, for trusting and breaking down the imposing and solid walls she had built around her was inconceivable. And yet, faced with the many selfless acts of the one who had irrupted into her plan, she had found herself giving him importance. She hated knowing that she was only considering trusting him. She hated the fact that he could climb these walls she had locked herself between.

Worse yet, she was terrified to find herself reaching out to help him climb.

Eyes closed, they kissed each other with fragility, embarrassed to feel such intense emotions but oh how much they surrendered to them.

Sitting side by side, they relished this moment of sincerity and calm after all they had endured. The highlight of their journey. The completion of a battle for freedom, the same cause that the rightful king of Asgard fought against to make it inaccessible to the people of the earth. This cause that he finally chose to defend ; for him at the beginning, but for her on the way, and for the others at the end of their fight.

Slowly, they parted. Loki then dared to rest his forehead tenderly against hers. They kept their eyes closed, as if to immortalized this moment in their memories, for who knows what might happen to them tomorrow.

That's why he whispered these few words :

"You're right, I... I'm a little tired..." He admitted again hesitantly, unsettled by this moment of pure sincerity.

Keeping her forehead against his, Sylvie nodded gently, not daring to open her eyes to face the truth she still had trouble swallowing.

"Let's stay here..." Loki continues.

"Only for a little while." She continues nervously, muttering her desires like him, probably too afraid that someone will hear them or too embarrassed to admit she is weak in front of him, while he is weak in front of her.

"Yes, after all... If something goes wrong, they know where to find us, right ?" He responds with a raised eyebrow as he still kept his eyes closed, trying to reassure himself by making excuses to stay.

"Yeah, of course, nothing prevents Mobius from coming back here." She confirmed casually.

"Well, unless... Unless he had to prune himself." He said worriedly. "But it’s not as if we have no way to reach them !" He adds anyway, optimistic and trying not to feel guilty.

“Yes ! We have the--” She mimics his optimism, as she pulls away from his forehead to observe the object in her free hand.

"T-the tempad..." He confirms by muttering and nodding his head, bringing in turn his attention to the latter.

The taste of her lips was still too present on Loki's for him to think properly. However, he was trying.

Shyly, he finally looked at her again, a quiet smile displayed on his face.

Of course, Sylvie had noticed it. How to ignore him ? So, embarrassed, she gave him an uncertain look, having no idea how they should react now. After all, despite their thousand years of life, the variants had never really been devoted to feelings or romance that seemed more than superfluous and unnecessary at the time. Although they were aware of their emotions, repressed or not, knowing how to react to them was still an area to be explored.

The landscape around them gradually brought her back to reality. Then, looking worried, she turned her gaze to the entrance to the Citadel. She remembered the corpse of the He Who Remains, the one who had wiped out her timeline and certainly thousands more.

Loki frowned, noticing the change in expression on his partner's face.

"Are you sure you’re okay ?" He asks once more with patience.

Lost in thought, Sylvie continued to look at the place where everything had changed with a blank stare.

"No..." she sighs slowly.

The god of mischief was envious to possess the complicated mind of his variant for the sole purpose of finding the source of her ill-being. It would be enough for him to touch her to enchant her, now that he knows the secrets of enchantment. However, would he dare ? He hesitated for a fraction of a second, before totally rejecting the idea away from him. He was incapable of defying her trust, for he knew full well that he would risk a lot if he tried. Especially since he was still cruelly lacking in experience concerning enchantments.

"But when I wake up tomorrow knowing that the one responsible for all this horror is only a memory, then I could savor every second of my life." She asserts returning her attention to Loki as if nothing had happened, speaking with confidence and lightness.

Perplexed but somewhat reassured, he just nodded briefly, straining to accept her answer. However, something in him told him that she wasn't being entirely truthful.

"...Glorious purpose." He said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Mh..." She only answers, a quiet smirk nestling in the corner of her lips.

Calm eventually took over. Neither of them spoke, only watching the story of trillions of lives forming before their eyes in those many fluorescent lines.

"We're not leaving." He speaks up, his statement sounding more like a question mark.

"We're not leaving." She repeats with a little more conviction than him.

Slowly, he finally took a light breath, before sighing in contentment.

After an extremely difficult journey that could have cost them their lives, even though the Ruler had decided that they would be spared so that they could both achieve their goal, they were going to be able to rest, they were going to be able to breathe. Because even if the gods have more ability than humans to resist fatigue and pain, they could do nothing before the effervescence of their emotions. And as tough as they could be, they were tired, mentally and physically.

Thereupon, on this mutual agreement, the two variants had decided that it was time for them to rest for a while. They didn’t know what they were going to do. But they had decided to figure this out…

Together.

[ifyoulovemeletmebinge]

Why do you hate Joey? And please don't spoil beyond season 2 for me.

hi! 

this is my first ever ask so this is kinda cool alrighty get ready bc this is going to be a LONG post. i’ll try my best to avoid spoilers. 

why i dislike joey potter from dawson’s creek: 

ok so I think what my growing hatred for Joey Potter mainly boils down to is just the fact that she is the type of character who has no personality, she is simply empty. when she does want something it’s because it helps her only, and she’s very selfish. this is hard to explain in the context of s2 which is where you are, but i am almost done with the last season and i feel this is where her character has turned to focus on over the course of the entire show. 

i will say, i completely respect other’s opinion of joey, mine is just that she’s not my favorite by any means in the show. i actually think she’s my least favorite. so i’ll try to explain that! 

let’s start with s1: 

- i actually enjoyed joey a lot in s1, i thought she was fun! she’s sassy and her “im beautful yet unaware of it” thing kinda worked. this aspect of her only works in the beginning though (since she’s young and that’s the entire point of being beautiful and young) and something i find aggravating about later seasons is this continued theme of unawareness that doesn’t fit with her character anymore. by that point, SHE SHOULD KNOW SHE’S HOT OKAY. 

- another s1 point is her relationship with Dawson. i was a strong shipper until ~certain future events~ happened because i liked them together. Girl Next Door is in love with Best Friend who’s oblivious to it, it’s a cute trope! i think for the first season, their focus on Joey’s suffering from just recently discovering her feelings for Dawson and trying to navigate them made for a good complex storyline for the Lead Female of the show. there was an exploration of female sentiment there that i personally haven’t seen a lot of, so i was interested. her relationship with Dawson in s1 was overall pretty good bc it set up excellent foundations character and plot wise for the show. 

- my only criticism (more like character-choice-to-eye-roll-to) for her relationship with Dawson in s1 is her treatment of Jen because of it. we all know Dawson falls for Jen super quick and that’s not his fault or Jen’s or Joey’s yet she chooses to blame Jen and antagonizes her the whole season because of it. basically, she was a bitch to Jen. now, that’s not to say that it didn’t make sense because it did, and i think it worked well since we need some Conflict here, but thinking back on it now after watching almost the whole show, her choices and behaviors towards Jen in s1 shift from a childish jealously funny thingy to outright unlikeable aspect of her character that is only built upon as the seasons continue. i would argue this is the beginning spark or preview into the Bitch she will eventually become. 

moving on to s2: i personally don’t remember much about joey from s2 bc my brain is Pacey Witter centered and he really shined during s2 so i apologize if i get something wrong, i’m outside my lane here teehee

- i feel that joey’s character in s2 starts it’s shift into Bitch Land and also Lost Land. this is where i feel they started to lose control of her, but something i find interesting about that is that the loss of control is extremely subtle up to the point where when you finally look back in retrospect, you can find those seeds being planted as early as s2. 

- let’s tackle her relationship with Dawson in s2. there’s a lot to unpack here, but let’s start with the fact that it started REALLY WELL!!! our queen was getting the boy of her dreams!!!!!!!!!!! and good for her, but ofc, because this is a tv show and they need drama for the ratings (i’m guessing :)) everything falls apart very quickly. i would also argue that the choice they made to break Dawson and Joey up in s2 was very definitive and formative for her character for the rest of the series; the seeds were planted when they broke up. 

- her reasons for breaking up with Dawson were understandable **at first** in my opinion, there wasn’t much reason at all to break up with him. yes, she needed to find herself (just like any young person does), but that doesn’t mean she couldn’t do it with Dawson. i actually thought they would do great at discovering her together, because i think Dawson is supportive and sensitive enough to help her. her excuse that she can’t do her art while dating Dawson was bullcrap. i could go on and on about why that is, but the best evidence of it is the fact that she hopped from Dawson to Jack with no hard feelings and continued with her art the same as before. her art didn’t get any better when she switched boyfriends so she really can’t use it as a scapegoat to explain breaking up with Dawson. 

- this break-up and then her romance with Jack is what really gets me about her in s2 though. i think Dawson actually commented on it: she wanted to be alone to find herself, but then she started dating Jack almost immediately after that decision. this is where Joey first starts contradicting herself. this is where she first starts her ever-running theme of not knowing what she wants from her life at any point in time. for inexplainable reasons, her character is confused and she has to lead everyone else along and confuse them with her. honestly, poor Dawson. she both Wants and Doesn’t Want things, and her inability to stick to one is annoying to watch. and it only gets worse! 

- her mistreatment of Jen continues, but what really gets me about her treatment of other characters in s2 is her relationship with Jack after he comes out. Jack has become one of my favorite characters in the show and his coming-out arc is (in my opinion) done extremely well for a gay character at that time. we don’t even have arcs like those THESE DAYS OF THE 21ST CENTURY WTFF!!!!!! it’s also a very important arc to me. i can’t cite all the evidence, but her friendship with him after he comes out is so messed up. she constantly acts like that weird Straight Girl Who Needs a Gay Best Friend. fucked up. she always apologizes and goes back on it after Jack has to snap at her multiple times, but it still makes her unlikable and inconsiderate to anyone but herself. Joey starts showing through her relationship with Jack that she only cares about herself. when she was dating him, she did it to feel good about HER art not because she really truly liked him, and when he came out, she wanted him to be a Stereotypical Gay Man for HERSELF, not because it was what Jack wanted, and he outright told her various times. she’s selfish. she doesn’t care about breaking Dawson’s heart and using Jack, she only sees her own benefit when she’s playing with these boys as if they’re not real people with feelings. this is another running theme that worsens her character throughout the seasons. 

- by the end of s2 i think her and Dawson are back together (i’m honestly not sure i was invested in Pacey <3) but then the whole thing with her dad happens and that was really interesting to me. her decision to breakup with Dawson in the s2 finale after what he did.... MADE SENSE. i was kind of sad about it, but it was right!!!!! she had to do that!!!! she went through a lot of trauma bc of it and being with Dawson would just remind her of it, it wasn’t fair to her!!!!! i thought, hmmm this is the cataclysm of their relationship here again. this would allow her to finally find herself after being lost all of s2 and then she can be with Dawson again. it was all set up to match together perfectly. s3 proved me wrong :) but that’s for another post. 

Joey is, at her core, an empty shell of a character. she starts off well and full of personality, but either bc of writing choices, or the audience reaction at the time they made this show, those aspects of her character start chipping away and she just becomes this unattainable sorcerer of men, who’s too good for any boy, but never good enough to be by herself. this is not the type of woman i personally enjoy watching, it gets tough watching her break everyone’s heart one by one just bc she “doesn’t know, isn’t sure.” it’s repetitive and makes for crappy drama effect. it’s frustrating. 

i’m sorry this is so long, i hope this makes it clear why she’s my least favorite character in Dawson’s Creek. again, i respect all opinions of her character. hey! if you love Joey Potter, then cool for you!!!! she’s just not that character for me, and looking just at s1-2, these are my reasons why. 

[one-boring-person]

You're Back!

The Lost Boys x reader

Warnings: vague mentions of death

Context: This is supposed to be a kind of crossover between Top Gun and The Lost Boys (because they are my favourite films) but it is only minorly so. The reader is a naval fighter pilot who is good friends with the boys and spends most of her free time in Santa Carla with them.

A/N: This hasn't turned out too well, because I'm ridiculously sleep deprived tired, so I will revisit it at some point, whether to rewrite it completely or to add to it, I'm not sure, but I will improve it. For now, I hope this is acceptable.💛😊

**contains some spoilers for Top Gun, but only vague ones**

Masterlist

I roll my eyes as yet another person stares at me as they pass, keeping eye contact with them until they stop looking, turning their gaze away awkwardly, carrying on with their night without watching me for the entirety of it. By now, I've had to sit through about a score of curious people in the last two hours, my tolerance for them quickly wearing thin as they continue to eye the uniformed stranger leaning against a motorcycle. Chewing on my lip, a habit I've never managed to kick, I carefully roll up the sleeves of my military uniform shirt, careful not to crease it too much, even though I will likely iron it before I wear it again, the hard-learnt instincts reminding me to stay smart and neat, even if I'm currently not in the presence of any commanders I need to report to.

In the stifling heat, my shirt sticks to my skin a bit, sweat coating my brow as I watch the crowd, my hair starting to become less styled and more dishevelled with each passing minute, the journey from the aircraft carrier I was deployed at to the airport in Miramar, followed by the gruelling motorcycle ride down to Santa Carla having that effect in me. I didn't have time to stop off anywhere on the way to get changed into my own clothes, seeing as I wanted to get to the little seaside town before sundown, choosing instead to stay in my uncomfortable uniform, knowing it may well curry me some favours here and there along the way - bartenders are only too happy to serve a member of the naval air force, especially a Top Gun graduate. Absentmindedly I feel my lips quirk up into a smile, recalling the time my friend, Pete "Maverick" Mitchell, used this fact to his advantage when in Miramar, charming a poor waitress into giving us all free food and drinks, though I'm pretty sure he promised her something in return, something which kept him out of the bunk rooms that night. Ironically, he never used that trick again.

Shaking my head, I cast my gaze over the crowd again, searching for a particular group of people, a sense of excitement rising in me when I hear the tell tale sound of their motorcycles cutting through the horde of people, my eyes swiftly finding the approaching people as they park their vehicles a little way away from me. Making a split second decision, I choose to stay by my own bike, waiting for them to either notice me, or walk past, a small smirk plastered across my lips, my eyes fixed on them: David, Dwayne, Paul and Marko.

Eventually, they push off their bikes and start making their way through the crowd, having missed my presence completely, the four of them easily moving amongst the people lining the Boardwalk, most sane locals knowing the group's notorious reputation. David and Dwayne walk ahead of Paul and Marko, who are pushing and shoving each other around, giggling and laughing to themselves as a band of girls squeals when the smaller of the two is thrown straight into their midst, drawing some attention from the people around them, though they have yet to notice me. Crossing my arms over my chest, I just watch as they move together, eyeing them as they come into range before looking around for something, quickly finding a discarded newspaper on the wall behind my motorbike. Smirking wider, I take it and tear off three pages, screwing them into a tight ball, my gaze returning to the approaching bikers, guaging the distance between me and them, knowing I have a very good aim, having practiced it a lot before and during training. Winding back my arm, I take aim and throw the ball, giving it some force so that the intended target will manage to feel it under his mess of hair, trying mg hardest to contain my laughter when the projectile connects with the back of his head.

Paul instantly looks around, irritation and confusion rife in his face as he searches the crowd for his assailant, still missing me, even as I throw another ball of paper, though this one is aimed for Marko, who also receives it as a blow to the back of the head. Disgruntled, the two vampires stop, looking around for the source, drawing David and Dwayne's attention as they realise their friends are no longer following them. Biting my lip, I throw another two, hitting both of the quieter boys square in the back, trying my hardest to hold back my laughter, though I am unsuccessful as they continue to search around, heads whipping to and fro as they try to work out where I am, the crowd of people around them starting to leave a berth around them, leaving their view of me unblocked and clear. Finally, I decide to put them put of their misery.

"Damn, I thought you guys were observant." I call out to them, tossing another ball of newspaper from hand to hand to show who the culprit was. Surprised, and somewhat shocked, the four of them spin around, their faces lighting up when they catch sight of me, Paul and Marko instantly racing over and engulfing me in a tight hug.

"(Y/n)! You're back!" The latter exclaims happily, pulling away briefly to look me in the eye before he buries his face into my clothes again.

"I am. It's good to see you all!" I respond, laughing as I wrap my arms around them, glad to finally get to see them again after so long. Over their heads, Dwayne and David shoot me equally glad smiles, the former ready to step in once the other two have released me.

"Not nearly as good as it is to see you again! I hate it when you leave!" Paul mumbles into my shirt, Marko agreeing with him as they continue to crush me.

"I hate leaving, too, but I always come back." I remind them, patting them on the back so that they'll release me, smiling at both of them as they grudgingly step away, allowing Dwayne to step in and pull me into a softer embrace, his long arms pressing me into his bare chest, his face burying itself into my hairline. Happily, I wrap my own arms around his waist, enjoying the sensation of his cool skin against my heated body, jealous of his pleasant temperature.

After a few minutes, I pull away again, looking to David, who just smiles (genuinely for once) at me, his intimidating reputation preventing him from showing any affection in public, though he isn't really one for hugs in private, either. Or, at least not with me. Instead, he gives my body a once over with his icy blue eyes, the gesture drawing a blush to my cheeks, especially when I feel the others do the same, some more discreetly than others - unfortunately, I'd managed to develop a crush on all four of them, so the idea of them blatantly checking me out is not one I dismiss too easily.

"It's good to see you again, (Y/n)." He greets, chuckling as he watches Marko and Paul fight over who gets to put their arm around my waist, only for the both of them to whine when Dwayne beats them to it, the taller brunette pulling me into his side with an intimacy he's never had before.

"Yeah, it's good to be back." I agree, smiling at them all, "What're we gonna do tonight? I have three weeks this time round."

"Three weeks? That's much longer than last time!" Paul comments, slipping in on my other side, slinging his arm around my shoulders so that I'm now sandwiched between two tall vampires.

"I don't have to stay that long." I point out, jokingly, sending Marko an apologetic look when he notices that Paul has managed to get his arm around me.

"That's not what I meant, it means that we can do so much more together!" The tall, blonde vampire explains, most likely already thinking up ways to spend the next three weeks, "We should go swimming in the sea, and go on all the rides on the Boardwalk, and go to concerts-"

"Take it easy, I only just got here!" I cut him off, grinning as David and Dwayne chuckle at their friend's antics.

"Speaking of which, have you eaten yet?" The platinum blonde interjects, lifting an eyebrow at me in curiosity.

"No, I don't have any money on me, actually. I think I left it back on the carrier, which is annoying." I frown, thinking for a minute before remembering something, "No, that's not true. I brought some of it with me. It's in the seat compartment of the bike, hang on."

Swiftly, I retrieve the money, returning to the two vampires who had their arms around me, both of them only to eager to repeat the gestures.

"You should know by now that you don't have to pay for food when you're with us." David reminds me, lifting an eyebrow at me as he watches me put the notes into a secure pocket under my belt.

"I know, but I like having it with me anyway." I supply, only too happy to start walking towards the food stalls of the Boardwalk, my stomach growling audibly as the scents of the different types reach me.

"Fair enough." Dwayne says, squeezing my waist gently.

In no time, we've bought some food and eaten it, continuing to roam the Boardwalk as the night goes on, the five of us having a good time together as we always do, falling straight back into our usual habits and patterns, the friendship as strong as ever, though I've noticed that their touches are often more lingering than before, and that they're stares are less innocent than they used to be. I try to ignore it, but it becomes increasingly harder as Paul and Marko continue to fight over who gets to wrap their arm around me, eventually just agreeing to swap every half and hour or so, Dwayne never leaving my side as David leads us around, the vampire smirking at me every now and then.

After a few hours or so, I feel myself starting to get tired, having had very little rest in the time between travelling and meeting the boys, so I ask them if I can join them at the cave, seeing as I have no other accommodation, to which they all wholeheartedly agree. Leading me back to the motorcycles, the four vampires quickly decide whether to take the road or the beach back to the sunken hotel, swiftly deciding on the road seeing as it is the most direct, and therefore the quickest, though David does promise that we'll ride along the beach at some point.

As we leave the Boardwalk, I ride towards the back, between Marko and Dwayne, easily keeping up as we thunder along one of the motorways, shrieks and whoops of exhilaration leaving us from the thrill, our speed dangerously high until we hit the dirt paths leading up to the Bluff, at which point I slow my bike down so that it can grip the dusty surface better. Ahead of me, Paul tries to goad me on, encouraging me to live a little, though my heightened survival instincts are telling me to be careful along the steep cliff edge. Coming to a halt at the top, we dismount and hide the motorbikes, the four of them swiftly taking me down into their abode, though I do collect a bag from the compartment under my seat before following, sitting it down on the sofa beside me as I collapse onto one, routing around in it briefly.

I pull out a slightly scuffed book, throwing it to David as he comes to sit opposite me on his wheelchair, the others crowding around him to look at it in curiosity.

"Got you guys a little something." I tell them, gesturing to him to open it.

Upon doing so, their eyes widen, Marko's breath hitching as he sees what it is, the young vampire obviously fascinated by it.

"When did you get these?" Dwayne finally manages, unable to tear his eyes from the photo album in David's hands, admiring the Polaroids I stuck into it, thinking they'd be happy to look at them.

"Well, I had my RIO* bring a camera up with him one time when we were on patrol, but I took the pictures. I thought you'd like to have some pictures of the sky in the daytime and at sunset and sunrise to look at, seeing as you can't see them in person anymore." I explain nervously, hoping they like it, suddenly feeling a bit unsure of whether they'd like to be reminded of this fact.

For near enough ten minutes, the four vampires are silent, flicking through the book with wide eyes, David tracing a finger over one in particular.

"How the hell are we supposed to thank you for this, kitten?" He finally says, the nickname making me blush a little, though I'm not entirely sure how to respond.

"You don't have to thank me for that, it's not that great of a gift, on the scale of things-" I start, only to be cut off by Marko.

""Not that great of a gift"? Are you serious? This is the best thing we've ever gotten!" He exclaims, tearing his eyes away from the photos so that he can come over and drown me in a hug again, crushing me into his chest. Laughing, I wrap my arms around him, holding him tightly, inhaling the comforting scent of his jacket as I do so.

Across from us, Paul also manages to look away from the Polaroids, coming over and joining us on the sofa, a grin on his face as he plonks himself on top of Marko, a grunt escaping me from the sudden weight.

"You're the best, (Y/n), you really are!" He praises me, leaning down to press a swift kiss on my cheek, smirking when I blush in response.

"I'm not sure about that, but thank you anyway." I wheeze out, their weight starting to become a bit too much for be to bear. Tapping on Marko's back, I wait for him to throw Paul off before pushing him off of my lap, taking a deep breath as I look over at Dwayne and David, who are still enraptured by the photo album.

"Who's that?" The latter suddenly asks, pointing to a certain picture.

Frowning, I get up and come over, looking down at the picture in question, smiling as I recognise it immediately, the image holding a lot of sad and happy memories for me.

"Those are my friends Maverick and Goose before..." My voice trails off, an old surge of grief gnawing at my heart as I recall the exact moment that photo was taken, remembering the aviators as they joked around with me and my RIO, Hawk, all four of us only staying still for that one photo.

"Before?" Dwayne pushes gently, dark eyes boring into mine with curiosity.

Clenching my jaw, I let out a sigh before I reply.

"Before the accident. The accident where Goose...died..." I manage to get out, my eyes now fixed on the miniature version of my friend's face, still wishing he were still alive and kicking.

"I'm sorry, (Y/n), I didn't mean to bring it up. If I had known, I wouldn't have said anything." David apologises, placing a gloved hand on mine in comfort, blue eyes sympathetic.

"No, don't worry about it. It's what happens in the military, and it just so happens to be that my friend got it in the neck. There's nothing that can be done." I tell him, grateful that they haven't pursued the subject, though the reminder has made me feel a lot more tired than before, for whatever reason, "I think I'm gonna go get some sleep now, if you don't mind. It's been a long day."

The four of them agree, Paul, Marko and Dwayne all pressing quick kisses on my cheek as I pass them, David following me to the little nest that they provided for me the last time I was here, the vampire watching as I settle in. I only take off my boots, socks and belt, unpinning my Wings from my chest as I go, briefly debating with myself about whether or not to unbutton my shirt and just sleep in my underwear, until I remember that David is still there, his blue eyes tracing my form as I move around.

Finally slipping into the makeshift bed, I notice that the vampire still hasn't moved away, watching me as if asking for permission to do something, my mind struggling to comprehend what he means until I see him look at the blankets questioningly.

"Do you want to join me?" I ask, surprise lacing my voice.

"If you don't mind."

I can't refuse him, so I simply move over and let him slide in beside me, feeling even more surprised when he pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me and rubbing circles into my skin with one thumb. A small gasp escapes me when I feel his hand slip under my shirt, his skin icy cold against mine, the sensation pleasant as starts to trace patterns into my sides, his eyes boring into mine as I watch him, still confused.

"What's gotten into you?" I question him, laying my head on his chest, my hands coming up to rest just on his collarbone, my fingers running over the line of the bone.

"Nothing, I just need to tell you something which might not be the greatest news you've ever heard." He tries to reassure me, his deep voice resonating though his chest and into me as he watches my facial expressions change.

"What is it?" I ask him hesitantly, dread biting at the back of my throat.

"Well, I don't suppose you remember us telling you about the whole idea of vampires having a mate?"

"...Yeah?" I frown slightly, briefly remembering the conversation.

"It turns out that the four of us have a mate, and it's taken us far too long to feel the connection." David confirms, swallowing at the confession.

"Oh really? Who is it?' I can't help but feel a bit disappointed, knowing that the mating bond makes the four of them off-limits to anyone else.

"You. You're our mate."

*RIO = Radar Intercept Officer

Part Two