#I don't have the energy to go back and fix it so just be imagininative

[dirtytransmasc]

What if Miles didn't save his dad and his universe collapsed anyway.

It'd happen so fast, one minute he's rushing to his dad and the next he's sprawled across the ground, shoved off course by someone.

(Miguel is an option but I like the idea it's just some random Spiderman.)

Miles 'canon' events happens but his universe still glitches, half of it falling into the Spot's holes as it does as the villain becomes more and more unstable.

1610 collapses in front of everyone, swallowed up by the ever growing pitch black holes, leaving only Miles Morales as it's lone survivor.

to say the boy would be a mess, would be more than an understatement, it wouldn't even come close enough to smell, let alone touch, the way Miles is feeling. but he wouldn't just be sad or gutted or hopeless or even broken after losing everything; he'd be angry.

if he allowed himself to be dragged from the glitching, fading rubble of his now barren dimension, he would rip HQ apart, piece by piece. he'd scream and cry and break down, his abilities turned up to 110, his electricity flowing out him without any control, lashing out at anyone who tried to invade his space, let alone tried to touch him or stop him.

I think he would come pretty close to taking down Miguel, he'd defiantly pin him, using his enhanced reflexes and sheer surprise to get the upper hand, before just snapping. he'd let loose on Miguel, physically yes, but he would scream at him. he'd shove his stupid canon theory back into his face, begging for an explanation; if he was supposed to let his dad die, if he was forced to, than why did he lose everything anyway?

he'd leave Miguel bloody, even in his fury, he won't kill him, he can't do it, but he will make him suffer. he wants answers, he wants so many answers, answers to questions he doesn't even know he has, and he needs Miguel for those.

once he burns up his anger and cries out his sadness, he's left numb and empty, frequently returning to his dimension to sit amongst what little remains of his home. it doesn't really hit him at first that everything is gone, he knows it is, but he just can't accept it, his mom, his dad, Ganke, his friends, the cashier at the bodega, all of them, they can't be gone. he didn't even get to say goodbye.

part of him knows, deep down, that he should have saved his dad, he should have been allowed to try, that they would be here if he had just gotten to try. call it insanity, desperate attempts at coping, grasping at straws, spidey senses, intuition, some higher intervention and knowledge, he has no fucking idea, he just knows, and it only fuels his anger.

he stops coming out of his "room" at HQ, stops letting people in, not even Pav and Hobie who have never wronged him, who were always on his side, let alone the others, who at one point or another abandoned him or saddled against him. he stops in general, stops eating, stops sleeping, stops trying to distract his mind with things like music. he loses it a few more times, tearing up whatever furniture he had been given to make up for his lack of a home, before turning to laying on the floor, looking up at the blank ceiling for hours, ignoring any of the desperate pleas from outside his door.

he cringes when he realizes he's just becoming Miguel. he ignores the thought. tries to at least.

he lies there and withers away until he can no longer fight the others off, till he's forced to let them take care of him, forced to listen to their apologies and their "it'll be ok"'s. he honestly doesn't care; everything that ever truly mattered to him is gone or tainted, he's lost his world, his people, his family, he lost his friends, he lost his purpose. he just floats through life, accepting that he's just gonna turn into someone like Miguel, cold and closed off, not really living, but not dead, and he's "ok" with that, more so, he doesn't have the care nor energy to be more than that anymore. he accepts his fate, for once, cause its clear that trying to do anything else only get him and the people he loves hurt.