#I don't blame him. math makes me wanna cry too

[turtlemagnum]

so my mom's shitty ex boyfriend was the person who set up the old internet, right. apparently, for some fucking reason, his set up had her paying roughly 170 fucking dollars a month. meanwhile, when i set it up, the same company wanted to charge us 70 bucks a month until this time next year, in which it'll get increased to 85 bucks a month. so somehow for now we're paying less than half the price we were paying (roughly 41% if i did my math right), and even when the price goes up it'll still be about half the fucking price. if memory serves they ran a credit check so like, maybe his dogshit credit has something to do with how much more we were paying? like the guy very much just drank most of his money away and then spent thousands of dollars on shit he couldn't afford because "he works hard, so he deserves it". which, side note but he was a maintenance guy who spent most of his day dicking around on his phone, hard worker my ass. like i'm not saying working a job where you barely do anything is bad, but it DOES make it so that it's bullshit if you try to act like you're such a hard fucking worker y'know. god, one of the worst things about him is that he always acted like he was the only person on earth that had problems, i fucking hate people like that. like, you might not believe it from my presence online, but i don't really complain a lot in real life. the other morning when i went to burger king to get food, it came out cold and i just ate it that way because i didn't wanna bother the worker. whenever somebody needs a shoulder to cry on, i'm there and i'm quiet and i only say things when i think i can make something better, y'know? i wouldn't consider myself a positive person or anything, but i try my best to keep my negativity to myself irl and i have a pretty good understanding of the fact that a lot of people have it harder than me. life's too short and painful to make it worse for other people by constantly bitching and moaning over every little inconvenience and perceived slight, y'know? it's also too fucking short to be constantly blaming people for things that are either your own damn fault or nobody's fault. god, i couldn't tell you how many times my mom's told me "well i WAS gonna get ready to go out but then you went into the shower and now i can't do anything all day and it's your fault, actually", and i fucking get that she has unmedicated ADHD but past a certain point i feel like you could just pop your head into the bathroom and say "hey, hurry up, we need to get going" y'know? im sorry mom, i just don't think it's anybody's fault that you lose motivation and energy easily, much less my own. god i need a shower

[manylittleguys]

To any SCP-4231-A kins/introjects/fictives/links/etc:

I wanna start this by saying I'm writing this for me, Francis, Apollo, and Ukulele, not for any of you. We were never given closure, so now we're taking it by force. If this helps any of y'all? Great! If it doesn't? Well, it wasn't meant to.

I don't regret loving you, Lilly. Sure, you hurt Francis in ways the four of us will NEVER heal from. And I do blame you, because you did do that to him. But I will admit I can also see, now, with the perspective of other headmates who weren't there for it all, that there were things we could have done better. I'd say we were only human, but I know now that humanity is a choice you make and I'm not going to make that choice for you. We were young. We didn't know any better. We were each others' first for a lot of things. We were in our early twenties, we were reality benders, we were inexperienced. I don't blame you for making mistakes (although I do blame you for making them over and over again once you learned their consequences).

But I don't regret being your friend, and I don't regret loving you. You gave me Meri. Because of you I became one of those very same Jailors you so despised. I went from a Destroyer to a Jailor. And you know what? I might even be glad you did it all. Because becoming a Jailor was one of the best things to happen to me. I met my husband and my fiance and my partners because I was a Jailor. I met some of my closest friends because I was a Jailor. I met a guy who accidentally turned himself into a dog, a guy who spontaneously generated apple seeds, a guy who somehow always narrowly avoided death, and a lady who toyed with deadly viruses and bacteria (often anomalous) like legos to make tentacle creatures because she thought they were neat.

And I remember some nice times with you too. I remember how you helped me learn how to control what I always called my "disability" but you called our "powers". I remember playing in the creek with you, when there was no one around and our teeth were sharp and our eyes were many and our horns and antlers caught on the low-hanging tree branches and our hooves didn't help us at all in the rocky waters. I remember my mom doing her best to homeschool us because she didn't want us in public schools, and I remember neither of us could sit still very long because we wanted to be anywhere except my kitchen table sitting on wobbly chairs solving math problems in notebooks my mom had painstakingly printed for us in pen. I remember a treehouse in the middle of the forest and teaching my best friend to play ukulele, even though she was terrible at it. Because yeah, I never said it, but you were horrible with my ukulele.

I remember hiding from you in the forest because I accidentally told you that I felt more like a boy sometimes, and I remember holding your hand so tightly when we went and told my mom. I remember the three of us crying together because I should never have had to feel so afraid of my own mother, and I remember making cookies later because "bravery like yours should always be rewarded, Fran." I remember sitting up late into the night looking through baby name books we borrowed from the library so I could pick a new name. I remember when I decided I wanted it to be Francis, because it was a pretty name and it sounded so much like the old one that it wouldn't be hard to get used to the switch. I remember going to the first doctor's appointment and mom yelling at the doctors that "my son is perfectly fine! He just needs help with liking his body! A seven year old should get to love his body as much as any adult!"

I miss that. I miss the time before I slept with my legs crossed, where I was afraid to come home from weeks away at work with the GOC with the Ichabod Campaign. I miss the time before I would wake up in the middle of the night crying silently, covered in seemingly fresh bruises, coughing up blood. I miss the time before it felt like I couldn't remember anything but my childhood and that house with you, when I could never remember what I did for work. I miss the time before it felt like I couldn't remember anything but my childhood and blood and guns and the GOC. I miss the time before I was afraid of being asked to tell the truth. I miss the days before I dreaded going to sleep to the point it became hard to sleep at night.

Lilly, I hope you can see the extent of what you did to me. If you have an apology, I'll accept that you've given it, but I can't promise I'll forgive you. I can't promise that Francis or Apollo will either. I doubt that Ukulele will forgive you. If you have an explanation to give us, I'll also listen to that, but I can't promise more than that either. Regardless, I think you should know that I regret that Ukulele killed you, in the end. Apollo, and to a lesser extent Francis, had hoped that maybe, when Meri was born, it would finally stop and we could be happy again. But we also knew that the Ichabod Campaign was on it's way and we wouldn't let them have Meri.

Alto

[halfgoosehalfmoose]

I'm feeling so so guilty right now. I always thought that the base path of life was school, uni, job, die. By the end of high school I was overwhelmed and depressed I often gave up on grades bc I thought I'd kill my self before I graduated, and everyone kept saying uni was worse and jobs were even worse. But I pushed through and now it I didn't know what to do bc I didn't plan to be here so I went to uni. But not normal uni. No, my depressed pathetic little self who was feeling completely left out and uncomfortable in her hometown thought oh well let me just cross the ocean to study in a foreign country completely different with a language barrier I'm sure I'll do great. 1 ducking year just learning the language and after a lot of grinding I got to uni just this month yay! Except it has sucked. All this cost my parents so much money. I don't work. I want to star ASAP but I still can't. It was so much struggle and fighting to get me here and now that I'm here I don't like it. It's like I threw away hundreds of euros. It's been a month and I hope it gets better but I'm starting to think it won't. The only person I've had a conversation with has been my roommate. The only socialization events are basement parties which I really don't like specially if I have to go alone. The degree is hard. One day I feel amazing bc I was so productive and the other I struggle to understand a paragraph. My efforts aren't enough and trying harder isn't working. I feel lonely. I feel lost. I want to dance. In my ideal ideal world I will be a professional dancer who will be on stages and videos and there will be rehearsal everyday and it will be with a crew and it's awesome. But in my real world I'm studying biology and barely understanding it. I think I tricked myself into thinking I would like to study biology bc it was the only subject I found interesting. But finding something interesting is not enough to warrant 10 hours per day in the library with still somehow not learning anything. I want to give up but I can't do this to my parents.

I'm spoiled. Both my parent earn good money and my life is full of trips, workshops, activities and luxuries that make me happy. I want that in y future too. But I have no idea how to get there with the way things are. As I said, I didn't really plan on being here. I don't even know how to try out the dance thing how the hell to you get into that kind of work? I hate it in here. But wherever I go there I am or whatever. How do I even face my problems at this point. When I was 16 and felt like dying it was so much easier to put the blame outwards. But now I'm 20 and never learned how to deal with myself and it's ruining the life I never thought of living. I'm scared that I will get to that point again and what I might do now that I'm alone.

I can't figure out how I feel it's almost literally every other day depressed and every oder day happy. I hate it so much I want to learn how to talk to people. I wanna call my dad and cry to him. But we don't really do that kind of stuff. But I want to.

I recently saw the choreography for a song called like JENNIE and I really liked it. For a moment of clarity after a depressing day of staring at the 670 Euro computer screen with nothing being absorbed into my mind I tried learning it. But I couldn't. It would be too loud and bothersome in my 461 euro per moth apartment.

It's like I'm a black hole.

My sister is doing fine. She did the same thing as me. She went for engineering though, because of her knack for math's and the money it gives. She hast failed a single test. She is graduating earlier than people who started earlier and she is working. She has really cool friend and has fun in parties. She's functioning. yay.

One daughter that worked out.

I hate this

[siri-ike]

He doesn't even have to think about turning invisible. It's like a fear response by now.

"Hey, kid. Ya here?" A gravely voice emanates from the front door. "It's 12. Ain'tcha hungry?" It's Harvey's voice.

Danny relaxes enough to turn visible again. Which unfortunately turns the tears in his eyes visible, too.

Harvey could have sworn there was no one there a moment ago. But, it's not like the boy just appeared out of thin air.

"Why'ya on the floor?" He tried not to sound too judgemental, but... it is Bullock.

"You're, bh, back." Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.

"Hey, hey. Are you hurt? What's going on?" Harvey sputtered. Jim didn't say anything about crying.

"I, th, thought, some, one, broke, in," He blubbered through quick shallow breaths. Pathetic. If he were back home, he could have held it together. Why was it so much harder here?

"Come on now. My place always looks ransacked. There's nothing to worry about." Harvey has barely gotten through his line before he had his arms full of his weeping houseguest.

It felt so good. Danny hadn't been hugged back like that in years. Sure, jazz sometimes put her arms around him. But Harvey could wrap his whole body in his grasp until not a pice of him was visible to the outside world. It was just like... his dad used to hold him. Mom's never been too physically affectionate, but dad used to pick him up like he weighed nothing. He has solid memories of being carried around all day until he was 4, 5, 6 years old even. He felt so safe back then. He feels so safe right now.

When Danny finally manages to breathe normally, His eyes being red from crying probably makes him look even more creepy. He could hardly blame those joggers for avoiding him. He wiped his face and let's go of his uncle, who took the hint and loosened his grip.

"But, what about the missing USB drive?" His voice is weak.

"Probably just rats." Harvey pasified, "or cockroaches."

That earned the questioning look Harvey was hoping for. "What? Don't believe me? Gotham cockroaches are huge, " He insisted, gesturing the size with his hands to be bigger than Danny's head.

"Heh, or ghosts." Danny giggled.

But detective Bullock is no fool. He noticed the keyhole was lose, the manilla folder for the Stirk case was missing from the windowsill, and all the keys that used to hang by the door were gone. He was sure other things were missing further inside the house. But he could handle that after he got the boy out of there. Besides, it's time for lunch.

Bullock figured they'd get out of there fast so he could send Montoya to investigate his apartment. But no, Danny had to wash his face after all the weeping, then he had to look one more time for the drive, then he stepped in something and had to change his socks. And what could he do? Rush him? He already cleaned the crime scene.

Sweet gesture, terrible timing.

13:45

They finally made it out the door.

The first thing Harvey did when they got in the car was call a 10-12 on the police radio.

"10-12: visitors present. In other words, be discrete." Danny gloated. The police radio was the first thing Tucker hacked as part of team phantom.

"Eh? You know the code. Huh?" Harvey turned the radio down.

In hindsight, it may not have been the best idea to reveal such a suspicious fact.

"Intrested in bein a cop?" Harvey looked rather proud.

What a reasonable assumption. He better not ruin it by saying something stupid.

"I wanna be an astronaut!" The moron confessed as though he wanted to be found out. "I've played all the simulations I could get my hands on." He chirped excitedly. "My mom and teachers keep saying my grades aren't good enough, I'm averaging a C in most of my subjects. Exept math and physics. But I've checked, you don't actually have to be good at all the subjects. You certainly don't have to get good at English. All you need is a masters degree in a STEM field."

"Is that all?" Harvey repeated.

"You also have to pass a bunch of exams. Like the-

Danny didn't even stop to breathe throughout the whole 20 minute ride to the station.

14:07

The police departments in Gotham are very different from the police departments in amity (He may have had to steal ghost hunting equipment back from evidence once or twice or 46 times). The whole building looks over a hundred years old, inside and out. Yet, it's still kinda classy. It's about how he'd imagine the 1920s looking, or even earlier. Like stepping right into the past, which wouldn't be the first time for Danny.

Harvey had an extra chair in front of his desk that clearly wasn't there usually (it was in the way), and once they were sat, it was the perfect time to ask.

"So, Uncle Harvey." Danny said in his surgery, sweet tone. "I believe you mentioned a shooting range." He lied.

"I mentioned no such thing." Bullock defended.

"But let's say you did." Danny, quite possibly, might be the least slick ghost in the living realm (if only because Pointdexter and Skulker are in the ghost zone). "Can we go?"

"We didn't even eat yet," He redirected.

"Pleeease?"

"No! I don't want to send you home with missing fingers." Bullock says, skipping past at least 3 other major reasons why that would be a bad idea.

Danny begrudgingly groaned in agreement. He's not going to mess this up on his first day by sneaking off.

"Look, we've got the whole summer. Prove to me you can keep your cool. Then maybe I can let you near a firearm," Bullock relented despite not being pressed further. "a small one." He added.

Danny perked up, surprised. He sat in stunned silence while his uncle got called into the commissioners office.

Was he just- not going to have to sneak? At all?!? Can this last the whole summer?! Surely he must be planning to trip him somewhere.

He couldn't figure out what it was. But every conversation made Danny want to... listen? To... do what he's told?

"Hey, common. Are you even alive."

"Yes, I'm alive!" Danny blurts out.

"You've been staring at that wall for a solid quarter." A young girl roughly his own age with long blond hair stood in front of him. She had an inquisitive look in her eye. Or accusatory, could go either way.

"Whatcha in for?" She asked with a snark in her voice.

"I'm, uh. No, my uncle works here, I just came with him."

"Don't mean you can't be in trouble." She claimed as she sat down in Harvey's chair, which only made her look even smaller by comparison. "I'm Steph."

"Danny." He hesitated.

"Well, Danny," she leaned in close. "Wanna see the morgue?"

__________

Next

(Let me know if you see any mistakes, I do not proofread these)

Ps. Next part's going to be a separate post because this one is getting way too long. Still going to have the tag list.

Also.

Does Danny want to see the morgue? Make your case in the comments.

@ladyredmoon13 @ryuukthehatter @sonrium @niamcarlin @sunnysolaria @tiffanyhart13

DCXDP prompt

Summer of change.

Maddie Fenton was many things, and a patient mother of two was only one of them. Here lately, however, Maddie found her patience wearing thin with their youngest child. Now she loved Danny. He was her son, after all, but here lately, his actions and overall dismissive attitude towards everything from his grades to his responsibilities was starting to get to her.

She and Jack had tried everything they could think of to try and get Danny to behave and reconsiderhis actions. From taking away his phone, restricting time with his friends, to full-on grounding him. Nothing seemed to work. They were running out of options, but there was one last thing she wanted to try before, even considering bringing up the suggestion of military school to her husband.

"Hey Jack?" She called to her husband from the living room." Yeah, Madds?" He called back from his position over the kitchen table as he tried to fix the trigger on their latest invention. Hoping that this will be what they'll need to finally catch that ectoplasmic nuisance of a ghost boy.

"Your cousin, the one from Gotham; the one you introduced me to at our wedding. He's a cop, right?"

-------------------------------------------------------

Detective Harvey Bullock was a man of little patience and even less tolerance to the kind of nonsense that the usual scum of Gotham City drummed up.

The only times he could ever really recall ever having more patience and tolerance than a saint was when he was growing up with his favorite cousin. So when said favorite cousin called him up out of the blue, asking for a favor, Bullock did little else, then say, "Sure thing," and " anything for you, little Jacky.'

That was how he got roped into looking after his cousins son for the summer. At first, he was hesitant. Asking Jack if he was sure he wanted to do that. After all, he didn't really have much experience with kids( and no, the Bats kids don't count).

But when Jack started telling him about all the trouble his kid was getting into. The arguments, the mysterious bruises, the skipping school, etc. The boy was on the start of a one-way street down to a bad place, and Bullock didn't like it. So he sucked it up and asked his cousin when he could send him.

Now Harvey knew he wasn't a good role model, that Gotham wasn't the safest place for any saine parent to raise a child, let alone send one here; but now that he was told what was going on with Danny. Bullock found himself determined to get the teen to turn over a new leaf. "Who knows," he thought to himself hopefully, "maybe Gotham was the perfect place for him to do it?"

[indigobackfire]

Sawyer comes into his life to make him pay for every time he disdained math xD

(I most certainly don't know how to draw children, she was supposed to look smaller but... and that was supposed to be Barnaby I swear xD)

[wincore]

Ooh okay ai sounds cool. I'm into stem too !! I've chosen math, phy, chem and computer science but I only have a vague idea (?!) ab what I want in college and it's kinda freaking me out bc most of my friends are so clear ab what they want to do later on in life 😭 😭 For now I'm rewatching high school musical for the 7830487474th time just to de-stress myself from the whole 'think about the future thing' bc I'll be starting senior year after in 2 weeks (smth ab coming of age Disney movies are calming) OML MOON YOU LIKE OCHEM ?!?! JDKDN  I've been learning it for over a year now and still haven't gotten a hang of it 😩 I'd choose calc over ochem in a heartbeat bc calc doesn't suck the few braincells I have like a vacuum cleaner. So I'm gonna use the 2 week break I have from school to understand ochem once in for all 😤 Gintama sounds interesting <3 animes with comedy are literally the best thing ever. As for one piece I've always wanted to see it but I freak out when I see the number of episodes it has 🥴 to quote lana's i suddenly realize my archnemesis is hot (during a battle to the death) one piece is like the grey's anatomy of anime and YES I'VE READ THAT FIC ENOUGH NUMBER OF TIMES TO QUOTE IT AND HDJSKDK SHRUBCHENG READING ONE PIECE FOR YOU, MISS MOON, HAS GOT TO BE THE CUTEST THING EVER but !! I don't blame him for being whipped this is miss moon we're talking about 💞 nct finally did smth for ppl who can't keep up with them lol nct news is a v v v smart idea + the little spoiler news anchor!jeno gave for the dream comeback in March made the vid even better ksjdj. Also, we're getting a rv comeback this march so it's gonna be one crazy month <33 AND I FINALLY FINISHED READING CORDUROY ANDBFKKDNDMD OKAY I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THE FIC 🤩 bff2l is one of my fav tropes <33 the fic made my yangyang brainrot phase even more intense. I'm in the process of binging all of your yangyang works <3 beginning from troublemaker bc it's such a classic (okay your whole 00line 'bad boy' series is a classic) to the wayv + Sci fi au. Now my brainrot has escalated to the alien!yangang state jdndi the tags made me cackle so loud XD 

p.s. header for corduroy is so cute why is it so yang2x of him to not figure out what playing ts' you belong with me means 😭 talk about hopelessly oblivious cutie idt even cupid can help him - 👻

honeypie, i am so so so sorry for the late response 😭 my life has been swamped and i've been feeling overwhelmed for a while now </3 

it’s alright to figure it out along the way!! that’s kind of what i’m doing too?? it’s a mix of ‘yeah, this is fun, this is what i want’ vs ‘life allows me only these few paths at the moment’. don’t stress too much and make decisions as best as you can 💕

honestly i binge disney to destress too hsdskh but sometimes i end up crying as the cherry on top 🤩 (cough cough encanto and turning red) but they are such a comfort spot for me !! i hope you’re doing better now though, sweetheart, and taking enough breaks like this!

SDDJDSJGJ it’s been a while since i’ve done ochem ngl but it was fun when i did it bc i actually used my brain back then 😩 the only thing i remember rn is grignard’s reagent ?? i got fun, sexy vibes from the reaction idk <3 and i absolutely ADORE calculus !!!!! it’s kind of the reason i love ai, because neural nets use a bunch of calc, even tho it drives me insane sometimes LOL and yes, on the occasion, i solve problems on differential equations just to feel something 😔 (like just 1 bc it drains me)

god, if a man reads one piece for me i will get on one knee so fast. lana knows my type too well 😩 and right???? i’ve read that fic so many times i could write my graduate thesis on it miss lana’s talent is unmatched 😤 pls do give gintama a try tho bc it’s so funny, it cheers me up every time ❣️ it’s more so for one piece, but it def looks a little daunting to newcomers 😭 1.5x is your friend if you ever wanna watch.

i can’t keep up with nct once again 💔 but omg the rv comeback!!!!! my queens never disappoint and my gf standards have once again been raised to miss kang seulgi and miss kim yerim 🥰

AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH, LOVE !!! it’s been so long since i’ve written anything and this put back the will to write in me piece by piece ugh 💖 yangyang is lovable in a rat kind of way idk it’s so much fun to write him hshdk omg the scifi au brings back memories it was so FUN to write!!!!! god, i’m gonna do something like that again if i ever have the time hhh thank you so much for compliments on the header!!! i think i gave up when i was making it but i’m glad it gave off cute vibes 🥰

hope you’re doing well this week, love!!! have a good time and stay safe 🌙

[tamagochiie]

--would you be so kind [tsukishima kei]

genre: fluff/slight angst 

pairing: tsukishima kei x reader 

song: would you be so kind by dodie

synopsis: you’ve fallen for quite a boy and what’s the best way to confess to someone if not during the school festival? 

wc: 2.37k

a/n: truth be told, i was inspired to write this when i was listening to dodie, and i tried to somehow tie the lyrics in with the story, but i kinda lost my flow in between, but the story still works! 

"This might seem strange..." You should've known better than to reach out to Yamaguchi and Yachi the moment those words left his lips. You should've cut him off, stopped him before he could finish the thought and left, but you didn't. You had sat there with your attention wrapped around Yamaguchi's finger as he conceptualized your perfect confession.

I should've gone to someone else, you thought. But you didn't have many friends and the ones you did have had no experience with love. You were lucky enough to have been friends with the ultimate Karasuno High duo canonically known to the student body as: YamaYachi.

Though, you weren't entirely sure if you could even deem yourself lucky.

They were quite meddlesome since you've come to know them and let them into your life. Though for someone as quiet and kept together as you, their presence helped spice up it every now and then. Like when they volunteered you to be the new volleyball manager without your consent, or when they had found out your heart had unwillingly fallen for Karasuno's notorious jackass, Tsukishima Kei, and butt in.

They would crack a wedge in every small opening they found to get you two together and chucked you right through it. During practice, when it came to water breaks, they'd make sure Tsukki wouldn't be able to get his water bottle, forcing him to go to you to ask for it. Whenever they heard Tsukki wanted to stay behind to practice, without your consent, they'd volunteer you. When it came to walking home, oh, they'd make sure you were always by his side while they followed behind.

Though it had been extremely uncomfortable and embarrassing, a friendship did blossom. Eventually, Yachi and Yamaguchi no longer needed to manipulate the forces of nature, and Tsukki would just come looking for you on his own.

So here you were, determination shaking in your bones as you strode down the crowded corridor of your high school, going against the current as you ignored your friends' attempts to catch your attention. You took deep breaths to calm the persistent thumping of your heart and to the ease  the miniatured yous dashing around in circles in your mind.

If it had been up to you, your confession would've been as toned down and discreet as you: sticking a note in Tsukki's locker and making a run for it. But your high school life had fallen into the hands of two people who shared the same brain cell, so of course, go big or go home.

At least that's what Yamaguchi had said.

He made it a point that it was their final year while you were still struggling in your second year. "If you're gonna tell someone you like them, you might as well do it facing them head on, right?"

As much as you hated it, he was right. But you shook the pompous image of Yamaguchi as you drew near your meeting place. You met Yachi at the corner away from everyone else. Her face softened when she saw the nervousness in your eyes and greets you with a hug."How are you lungs?"

"They're a bit in pain." You answered honestly, breaths shaky. "This so dumb, I don't think I can do this."

"If I could swap chests with you today, I would." She joked as an attempt to ease you; it was her silly way of saying, "I'd trade the storm in your heart for the stillness in mine," and though her odd one-liners would help, it wasn't working. "You don't have to do the funny stuff Yams said—just  go up to him and tell him. That's all you really need to do...They boys are just over there by the ramen booth,"

You leaned to the side to catch a good look at Tsukki, but what you find tightly gripped your heart and squeezed out the little confidence you had been mustering the entire day.

Another girl—a pretty girl—who was glued to him by the hip, laughing and twirling her hair. But what shocked you the most was the way Tsukki looked at her intently as she spoke, like he was making it a point to actually listen to whatever was coming out of her mouth.

Yachi caught the pain etched in your face and turned to see what the problem was, "Oh shit."

You didn't exactly know what came over you, but before you brain could match the tempo of the rest of your body, you called out his name and marched towards him. "Tsukishima Kei!"

Eyes dilated and looking down at you, he blinked at the sudden sight of you. His lips twitched in a smile as if he was happy to see you, but before he could address you or even say hello, you cut him off, unintentionally yelling, "I like you! I-I know you know that I like you, b-but that's not enough...So, i-if you would—Please go out with me! "

Time was such a fickle thing; because though it had only been a mere couple of seconds, it felt like you were stuck in a forever as the silence lingered between you, Tsukki, and everyone else that was within range to hear not only your confession, but your unexpectedly bold decision to ask him out as well.

Holy fucking shit, you thought. Though the silence was a loud and clear response, the rapid thumping of your heart was louder; and you couldn't stand the thought of staying there any longer. So before Tsukki would even manage to part his lips, you bolted out of there.

You ran to the pool side, far from where everyone else had gathered, where you were supposed to watch the fireworks with Tsukki if things had fallen into place like it was supposed to. You plopped yourself onto bleachers and sunk your head into your hands as you wept. You felt in incredibly silly.

"There's gotta be some butterflies somewhere," Yamaguchi had said this when you asked if it was a smart move for you to confessing to someone when you weren't even sure if there was even the smallest possibility the feelings were mutual. You should've taken it as a sign that you shouldn't have done.

But you did.

Oh, god, you did.

The image of Tsukki looking at you dumbfounded by your confession bled through and all you could do was sob harder into your hands. You remember  the teams' faces, how shocked they were to have heard you say more than three words in one breath.

Oh, shit, the team. You were gonna have to quit being manager because there as no way in hell you could bounce back from the depths of your embarrassment and pretend as if you hadn't done that, especially in front of that pretty girl.

You wanted to hate Yamaguchi and Yachi, to place the blame on them, but they never said to screech out a confession let alone ask him out. So, this was undoubtedly on you. In the end, you were the idiot and you probably just lost a really decent friendship with someone you didn't even believe could be a good friend to begin with.

Regardless of Tsukki's reputation, he was quite kind, considerate, and attentive; if you were struggling with math or life in general he was willing to listen if he couldn't physically step in to help. Thinking about it, he always seemed to match his pacing with yours. If you were in a good mood, he'd banter with you, but if you weren't he'd tread lightly and do something to lift your spirits.

During lunch, he'd buy food in pairs; one for him and one for you because he when he asked why you didn't bring food every day, you told him you didn't have time to do it in the morning and you were too tired to bother when you came home. He'd lend you his jacket if you felt cold.  He'd always wait for you after club if you had to pack up equipment or do extra tasks.

All these small gestures made your heart stand on its toes, but maybe you were bold to assume he saw your more than a friend.

Maybe you were bold to assume anything.

"I wanna die!" You groaned as you finally lifted your head from your hands, your eyes meeting the sky. The sun had fallen into the horizon and it was beginning to grow dark.

"Well, if you drop dead now, I won't be able to give you an answer." You jumped at the disembodied voice, gasping. You whipped your head to find Tsukki stepping out of the tall shadow of the pool shed. A sly smirk played across his lips with this hands hidden behind his back as he waltzed towards you.

You frowned at him, not really looking at him, but rather the buttons on his shirt. Too tired to run, you accepted your fate and swallowed the little pride you surprisingly had left and decided to face the rejection head on.

"H-How'd you find me?" Your voice was strained from the crying, so you cleared your throat and tried to relax. But when Tsukki took up the space beside you, you couldn't help but flinch back into stiffness.

"Yamaguchi said you might be here..."You scoffed as you brought your knees up to your chest, still avoiding looking at him. You looked ahead at the backdrop of the night, your ears trained on the subtle chirping of the crickets nearby. This would've been an ideal date moment, thought. The embarrassment once again creeped in and you shiver at what you had done moments ago.

Why was he here? Shouldn't he be with that girl? If he was here to reject you, he should hurry up rather than spend another moment wasting it on silence.

"Hey—"

"If you're going to reject me, please do so now." You deadpanned, cutting him off. There was a tingling, numbing feeling that began to build in the tips of your fingers, and would later spread throughout your whole body. "I'd rather you be straight to the point and reject me now. I'd rather you be cold and straight to the point rather than sit here and pick at your words, so please  just hurry and reject me."

Tsukki scoffed at you, pushing the frame of his glasses further onto the bridge of his nose. "Well, damn," He seethed. The way he said your name made your heart float, but your stomach drop. "What the hell do you want?"

"Excuse me?"

"You asked me to go out with you, now you want me to reject you? Tell me, which is it?" You looked at him, finally meeting his gaze. He looked annoyed—no, he looked angry and you couldn't tell why.

"I—"

"Because I came here with an answer and a bag full of that spicy ramen you liked so much," He leaned in, lessening the gap between the two of you. Though you should've been wary at the close proximity, you couldn't help but have your thoughts wander over to the spicy ramen. Did he really bring me spicy ra—" You're so annoying! I listened when you told me what you had to say, so shut up and listen to me."

"Tsukki I—"

"Yes." He said, firmly. He swung his leg over to the other side of the bench so that he'd be completely facing you. Your cheeks began to burn and you swallowed thickly at the action. "Yes, I will go out with you. I want to go out with you. Damn it, I was supposed to ask you myself, but you had to go ahead of me. I didn't even know you had that in you."

"...I didn't..." You muttered.

"Then why'd you go and do it?"

"I—" You were at a loss for words; partly because Tsukki had just said yes, but also because of his bluntness and the aggression laced in the words that so easily left his lips. "I wanted you to know before you graduated...and it would've been a waste if I stuck a note in your locker instead of facing you head on..."

"So you decided to yell it at me?"

"I panicked!" You retorted.

"Why?"

"Well," You caught your bottom lip between your teeth before you could let yourself finish. You remembered the pretty girl, how close she leaned onto Tsukki, and the bitter taste that followed. "I—Cause...That..That girl you were with...I kinda just...I snapped, okay?"

"The girl?...Oh." It was as if you heard a clicking sound the moment Tsukki had realized what you meant. "That's my cousin... She'll be an incoming first year next year, so I wanted to show her around."

Oh, my god, shoot me in between the eyes.

You buried your face back into your hands as Tsukki began to laugh. You wanted to die right then and there, you prayed to the deity's to grace you with some sort of blessing and hit you with a rock—maybe even get set on fire by a firework. Anything.

"Wooow, I can't believe I like you." Tsukki sighed as he leaned back with his arms stretched behind him for support. You peaked at him through the spaces between your fingers, watched as he smirked to himself.

"W-Wait you really like me?"

"Duh!" He spat, rolling his eyes. "Did you think I said yes to you as a joke? I would've said yes to you in front of everyone back there if you hadn't taken off like that." You sat there as you pressed your legs closer to your chest, resting your chin on your knees completely dumbfounded. You had many questions, but not enough time to take up in the night to ask it all.

You sat up straight before completely twisting yourself to face him. He furrowed his  brows at you, watching you shift in your seat as you tried to regain the confidence you had lost. You cleared you throat and met his eyes, leaning in. "Then, would you be so kind to fall in love with me?"

A playful smirk tugged the corner of Tsukki's lips, "I already have."

[truthisgoldenau]

IT'S PRIDE MONTH

for a moment there I accidentally had Pierce's photo under Marian's name oop

Time to officially confirm some AU canon LGBT stuff! Each character is their own pride flag but I'll add in other stuff that's canon in universe plus some bonus stuff at the bottom.

First up is Freddy Fazbear Jr! Gay all the way.

He's definitely the "move I'm gay" type

Was honestly super freaked out to tell his dad but went with the bold approach of bringing home his first boyfriend and blatantly announcing their relationship as such as a challenge and was honestly surprised his dad wasn't bothered by it

He was around 13 at the time and so the twins and Fred were still in touch with Maddie's parents and brother. All three were incredibly supportive (and still would be)

He absolutely had a crush on Bonnie Burnette even though he had never talked to him. Since the twins and Bonnie went to the same high school he knew of Bonnie, thought he was a dreamboat, but because Bonnie was somehow in with the popular kids (it was the money 100%) Freddy didn't even bother

Frankie Fazbear! My ace son! (The ears are wrong blame the app lol)

Honestly doesn't even know he's ace until much later

He's had crushes before but he's never been in a relationship (part of it is the attempt to communicate since he's mute sort of stops him)

He wasn't even sure it was worth mentioning to his dad so Fred never knew

This boy can hold so much love in his heart but he's not a very physical person that's all

Fred Fazbear Sr! YES. HE'S BI.

Only Maddie even knew he was bi. That he knew of. Some people probably figured it out with his over the top always on personality.

Fred was constantly sure that Pierce picked up on it particularly after the Christmas mistletoe fiasco but if Pierce gave a shit he never said anything.

Frankly it was amazing that more people didn't pick up on it. He was over the top about everything until a point.

While he didn't overreact to his son very blatantly announcing he had a boyfriend, he was very proud of him. It was a very Fazbear family way to come out. Even though he got so distant, he was always proud of his boys.

Bonnie Burnette! Also bi!

Being constantly surrounded by the popular crowd and always being the sort of stand out with purple hair and stupid purple bunny ears didn't do much to make Bonnie feel like he could even tell anyone he was bi.

Really the only reason he was even in the popular crowd was he was rich.

It made him less of a target for bullies at least cause the jocks wouldn't stand for anyone messing with him.

Knew Frankie from math class and honestly wished he could have talked to the quiet kid with bear ears as an alternative to the entirety of the popular group

Sort of in the background of the AU story very quietly develops a crush on Freddy and then thinks "oh God I like the troublemaker NO"

Chandler Cicily! Lesbian!

Would absolutely describe her sexuality as "girls"

She's starting to discover it during the AU (even if it's not a topic that comes up but that's why there's this post about stuff lmao).

She's the baby of the group since she's 16 when the story starts and relationships aren't important to her yet

But the crew still support her when later she's like "maybe I just wanna bake things for a cute girl and let her put flowers in my hair is that too much to ask" (Marian always chimes in with "mood")

Marian Mengele! An absolute bi icon!

Listen, her one goal in life may be to find her lost childhood friend, but that doesn't mean she's solely interested in this one Irish redhead

That said she's definitely only dated redheads

She's not afraid to be open about her orientation. It doesn't bother her. She's seen as weird already what can it hurt.

That said she falls for Finn so goddamn fast when she finds him that she questions herself and then is like "no wait I'm definitely not straight"

She's very upfront with Finn about it. There's no reason to hide this from him (or anyone) and if they're a thing she wants him to know.

Finn being the wonderful human being still loves her and it doesn't bother him. Why should it? He's just happy to be with someone who loves him.

Chetana might be Chandler's fake big sister but Marian is like fake mama when it comes to Chandler finally coming out.

God bless Finn for being the kind of person to sit and let Marian braid his hair with flowers because that's one of Marian's favorite things to do when her partner has longer hair and Finn's never really bothered with keeping his hair short THESE TWO ARE ICONIC I love them

Pierce Graves! A shitty pansexual icon

First off he absolutely knew that Fred wasn't 100% straight he had no idea how it wasn't immediately obvious to everyone

That said Pierce literally did not give a shit who knew about his sexuality

As shitty as his whole personality was he could turn on the charm easily

His parents definitely knew but he was already a punk ass rebellious teen at the time so they have him the "be careful, don't get anyone pregnant" talk and worried from afar. If it bothered them, Pierce never knew because they made sure that he could still count on them (even though at the time Pierce didn't really talk to them much about anything)

Fred absolutely knew though I mean they were good friends

He's not a romantic. He's never really had a meaningful relationship because he's not that type of person. To be honest, there's a piece of him that saw relationships that worked and wondered how that would feel but he knew that wasn't for him. He figured that out way early on when he asked his granddad why he didn't have a grandma and Mortimer Graves didn't sugarcoat the answer. "She wasn't happy with me. I gave her the choice. She could stay and be miserable with my lack of a decent personality even though I was already struggling to not be such an ass or she could go and find someone who actually made her happy. She chose happiness, and while it sucks that she drifted out of my life and your dad's, she's better off."

Pierce could frankly always tell that he was more like his granddad and as much as he sometimes wanted to know if he could even out up with a meaningful relationship, he avoided it. Better to not hurt anyone and wonder than to become the catalyst for someone else to overcome, right?

Fritz Smith! Gay!

The shy bumbling mechanic of the early 90s Freddy's ? Gay? It's more likely than you think

He was still far in the closet in the 90s He was young, living at home still because he had just gotten out of school, and while his parents weren't super conservative, he also didn't know how they'd take it

Found a friend in the day guard Mike Schmidt early on. Mike was looking for a roommate since his last one had moved out and Fritz jumped at the chance

They are like totally boyfriends by the time they cameo in the story though

Mike Schmidt! Another gay icon!

Mostly invited Fritz to live at his apartment because he felt bad that this poor shy mechanic was getting constantly harangued about the animatronics having problems

Was glad to let Fritz complain about it and even cry it was very stressful but Fritz needed the money

Mike liked him. It would be hard not to really. Fritz was a sweetheart.

Mike didn't ask him out till much later though he wasn't quite sure that Fritz was gay and didn't want to ruin their friendship.

Luckily it didn't and as it turns out they worked well in a relationship.

Fritz's parents had to take some time to get used to it when finally Fritz got the nerve to tell them but as soon as they did there was no end of support from them

Mike's parents were the opposite which was mainly why he already lived by himself but oh well he got a cute boyfriend and cool parents-in-law later it was kind of a win

Daniel Hartford-Dunn! Gay!

Presenting Maddie's older brother!

outside universe fact, he's loosely based in my actual cousin who lives in California with his husband.

He's 7 years older than Maddie was. Despite that, they were still close. Maddie's parents wanted more kids but struggled to get the two they had.

He's an accountant for a corporation and his boyfriend (and later his husband) is a pilot.

Last time he saw his nephews in person was at Maddie's funeral. He misses them terribly but over the years less and less contact came from his brother in law

Sometime in 2006 though he ends up getting a call from his nephews and there's this great reunion.

He's just. This chill older guy. Who loves his family. And doesn't care what people think.

Since I can't put anymore photos, here's the bonus content!

-as mentioned last night Dr. Phillip Guy is on the ace spectrum. I don't have anymore details about that at the moment unfortunately.

-Charlie Emily is a lesbian. The Emily twins were born in 1980. They haven't appeared in the AU yet even as cameos but they exist. Considering in AU canon the Emily family is alive and well in Hurricane, Utah without an Afton to be found, Charlie's dating her childhood friend Jessica at around the time the AU events are happening.

-Sammy Emily is trans and bi. Both Henry and his wife (who I know I at one point named but don't remember what it is anymore) love their two daughters to pieces.

That said I'll make a post at a later point introducing the Emily family because so far I've only officially given the design for Henry and not the rest.

In line with canon, Spring Bonnie/Springtrap can be counted as gay.

While Fred kept the shows at the diner pretty simple and straightforward, there was definitely this subtle underlying idea that Spring Bonnie and Fredbear were a content gay couple although if asked it was easy to present them as friends. At least, that was during '81-'82

However!

Fred also had Henry help him program in a special one time only song called Springtime for his and Maddie's anniversary in 1983, which was of course a love song. Fred always thought of that as being mostly for his wife, and partially as a turning point thematically for the two characters.

Henry was on board with this. They still kept it subtle, but there were clear moments where it was pretty much certain that the only way to interpret Spring Bonnie and Fredbear was as a couple. It was either so subtle that no one was bothered or Spring Bonnie's chosen voice was so ambiguously non-binary that no one thought it was odd.

Fred had plans for it to become more "canon" but never got to implement them since Spring Bonnie got damaged before he could.

Springtrap, being sentient and able to later interpret his emotions, is very confused about how he as a machine was meant to feel about this character he knew but the more sentient he becomes the more aware he is that he misses Fredbear and that he loved him. It's the cause of a lot of internal conflict for him. But he can be counted in the category of LGBT characters in the AU.

Happy pride month ya'll! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

[godlydolans]

Tumblr problems again.

Tumblr again wouldn't let me answer asks, so I'm doing it this way.

This actually wasn't in my inbox, I don't know what tumblr's deal is. Anyway, sorry for the delay, anon, I had planned to post this yesterday but I had to write this two times because the first time wasn't posting.

It was a girls' night out, there were plans to visit this new pub that has opened nearby, stay for a few hours and then go straight home. At least that was your plan. You just wanted to catch up with your friends.

Getting piss drunk was never a part of the plan but that's what ended up happening at the end of the day. What were you supposed to do, all your friends were drinking and they were encouraging you to at least have one glass. That one glass turned into multiple and you didn't even realise when you got this drunk.

And now you are scared. You obviously can't drive like this and you don't have the balls to call your boyfriend, Grayson. You know hell will break loose when he finds out you are drunk when you'd promised you would control it tonight.

But you can only avoid him for too long. He is the one who calls you once its past 11:30. Your breath hitches in your throat when his name flashes on your phone screen, causing your friends to throw you teasing smiles and smirks.

"He can't stay away from you, can he?"

You just give your friend a small smile and excuse yourself from the group, walking out of the pub and taking a breath of fresh air before answering the call. "Hello?"

"Hey babe, I just wanted to know when you're coming back home. Its getting late and I don't want you to drive alone at this hour."

"Uhh.. I actually wanna come home right now, but ahh..can't really drive right now," You squeeze your eyes shut, contemplating what he will say when you tell him.

He doesn't speak for the next few seconds, you actually have to call his name before he finally speaks, "you're drunk?" Grayson's voice sounds harsher than it did before, "How drunk?"

"Just a little bit, baby." You say, voice small and meek in comparison to his. "Can you please come pick me up?"

He sighs and you hear some rustling on the other side before he says, "Yeah, I can. Send me the address and I'll be there."

And you can see the familiar blue Porsche from the window within fifteen minutes of the phone call, causing you to say rushed goodbyes to your friends, collect your things and walk to the car that has several people's attention. Ha! If only they could see what the prince driving the beauty looks like!

Grayson already leaned over and opened your door for you from the inside before sitting straight again, looking straight ahead. One look at him and you can tell he is mad. So you just sigh, getting into the car wordlessly.

The whole way home, grayson doesn't say anything and you don't have anything to say other than 'sorry'. So you're left to pout on your own, staring out of the window, watching the cars, trees and buildings passing by in a blur. Then you look at Gray, who is gripping the wheel really tight, the vein in his bicep is popping. You go back and forth between the window and your boyfriend for the rest of the ride.

When you do reach home, Grayson shuts off the engine, gets out and goes into the house, forcing you to follow behind him. His legs are long and you can't match his stride because of your tight dress, not to mention the high heels you have on that are really killing your feet. On top of that, you can't walk straight, tripping over your own two feet.

Grayson has to stop on his way to the bedroom and wait for you to catch up. When he turns back, he sees you walking with your head down and your hair coming in your face, obstructing your view of the floor. You stumble once and he is walking over to you.

You are left flabbergasted when one moment, you are strppling to walk on the plain floor and the next, the floor is not even beneath your feet. Your man literally swept you off your feet and is now carrying you to his room like you're some princess.

Like you are his bride.

The thought makes you blush and giggle to yourself but that giggle quickly dies down when Grayson's jaw hardens. Little do you know, he clenched his jaw to stop himself from smiling at your utter cuteness.

Drunk Y/N is the cutest girl in the world, in Grayson's opinion.

"I'm sorry, Gray." You mumble, looking up at him from under your lashes as he opens the door to his room and then closes it with his foot.

"Its okay."

You know it's not okay, you can tell from his tone alone that he is still angry at you and you don't like it when Grayson is angry, especially when he is angry at you.

Drunk Y/N is also very emotional, so when Grayson places you down on his bed and turns back to walk into the bathroom, you kick off your heels in frustration, hands working to take off your earrings next. The goal is to keep yourself busy so you don't break down crying. The bottom lip that has been slightly jotted out from the moment you got into the Porsche with Grayson, has now started to wobble when the left earing starts to get difficult.

Grayson comes out of the bathroom with a pach of makeup removing wipes in one hand and one of his t-shirts in the other. The sight of you struggling to take off your earing is what he is met with. He just stops and stares as you struggle with the little thing, your eyebrows furrowed like you've been told to solve the toughest maths equation, lips pouting cutely, hair falling all over the place. His heart melts for you and all the anger he had melts away right with it.

How can one be mad at their girlfriend when said girlfriend is the cutest woman in the entire world?

"C'mon, you bitc-" You all but yank at the earing, yelping on pain the very next second and that causes Grayson to continue walking till he is kneeling in front of you.

"Easy there, tiger." He chuckles as his hands take yours and push them away from your poor ear, "I got this."

You just look at your pretty painted toenails, fingers absentbmmindedly playing with themselves as Grayson takes off your earing in one go and hands it into your open palm. You scoff, glaring daggers at the little earing, "I always knew she liked you better than me."

"Who-the earing?" Grayson asks, amused as he watches you narrow your eyes at the earing and press your lips together as if you're trying to intimidate the inanimate object, before you mumble, "You betrayed me." very quietly.

Grayson just bites his lip, watching as you slam the thing down on the bed and begin to remove your necklace. While you are doing that, Grayson takes out some wipes and begins taking off your makeup from your forehead. His hands are so gentle on your face, you doubt any makeup is coming off at all, but you don't stop him. His fingers tilt your head up when he starts to get product off your chin and your heartbeat doubles up in speed when Grayson's fingers apply the lightest pressure on your lips while taking off the dark lipstick you had put on earlier in the evening. He does it all with such concentration too. Gosh, you love this man so much, it hurts!

"Okay, get undressed and put this on. I'll go take a shower." He instructs, handing you the t-shirt he brought for you before he disappears into the bathroom again. This reminds you that he is still mad because you guys usually take the night time showers together. With a heavy heart, you get yourself out of your tight dress, get into the shirt and grab a pillow and the smaller blanket off Grayson's bed before you leave the room.

Grayson comes back to an empty room, thinking you must be in the kitchen getting water or something, but when you don't come into the room even after fifteen minutes, he gets up and decides to go look for you. He doesn't have to look for long because he finds you curled up on the couch with a blanket draped over you, the moment he takes a few steps into the living room.

Sighing, Grayson walks to you and kneels down in front of you. A kiss is placed on top of your head, causing you to open your eyes and stare up at him. The second you know its him, you quickly hide your face in your pillow, not wanting him to know you were crying.

But Grayson notices the tear marks on your cheeks and he also notices your light sniffles that are pulling at his heart strings. "Hey, no. Babe, why are you crying?" He asks, keeping one hand on top of your head and kissing your temple. "Y/N, why are you sleeping here?"

There is usually not much in the world that can make Grayson Dolan weak in the knees, but one thing that he absolutely can not bare to see is tears in your eyes and the sad thing is, whenever you cry, his brain freezes and he doesn't know what to do. He usually settles for holding you to his chest and carding his fingers through your hair, but today, since he's sure he is the cause of your tears, he doubts you would want to be held by him. "Baby, why'd you come to the couch?"

"Because you're mad at me and I thought you wouldn't want to sleep next to me." You sniffle, voice breaking sometimes.

Grayson sighs, looking heavenwards for dramatic affect because he's extra like that before saying, "baby, I'm not mad at you! And I would never not want to be sleeping next to you, hell i can't even sleep well when you're not next to me."

This makes you peek up at him, "you're not mad?"

"No, now can you please get up and come to bed with me?" He taps your thigh, urging you to get up which you do, at your own lazy pace because who can blame you? Your feet are sour from wearing those damn heels all night.

Grayson doesn't have a problem in picking you up and carrying you to the room again though, so that's what he does, making you giggle when he sweeps you off your feet for the second time today.

Once he's tucked you into bed and gotten in himself, the blankets over the both of you, he pulls you into his arms and sighs in contentment.

"You sure you're not mad?" You ask again, just to be sure.

Grayson smiles and squeezes your waist, "No babe, go to sleep."

"Okay, I love you."

"I love you too."

"I love you three."

Grayson's chest vibrates with his laughter, making you look up at him innocently because you didn't know you cracked a joke?

"Y/N, you're so drunk, babe." He laughs again, causing you to snap.

"But I still love you, even if you were mean and laughed at me and didn't say it back and also called me a drunkard." The tell tale signs of a drunk Y/N is her getting triggered over the smallest of things.

Grayson knows better than to mess with your feelings right now so he just says what you want to hear. So much for being mad. Ethan is right, he really is so whipped for his girl. "Okay, babe. I love you four."

You smile, "love you five, Gray."

"God, Y/N, go to sleep."

[staygoldponebone]

BFFs?

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Request by: anonymous

A/N: I didn't know how to end this so...yikes. And also sorry it's so long...

"Just a little further." You whine.

"No. It's hot, y/n." Steve replies. "Plus, you weigh a ton!"

You gasped as Steve dropped you on the ground. It was a hot, August day. Steve was giving you piggyback rides to and from his house. But apparently, that stopped now.

Steve dropped on the ground beside you, sweat running down his forehead and down his bare back. "Man, you sweat a lot." You laugh.

"Oh, yeah?"

He wiped the sweat from his forehead, then wrestled you to put it on your cheek. You laughed, underneath him. And his damp hand was placed on your face. "Ew!" You scream. "Your whole sweaty body's already on top of me! I'm gonna smell like a gym sock!"

Steve laughed, standing up. He held his hand out for you and you pulled him back down. You got up on your own.

"Ha. See ya, loser." You laughed, then he tripped you and you fell. "Steve!"

All you could hear was his laughter as you stood up. He pointed at you, squealing with laughter. So you went past him, pushing him outta the way.

"Aww! Don't be mad!" He exclaims, giving you a hug. "I'm sorry."

You rolled your eyes as he pulled away.

"Race you to my house!"

"You're on, asswipe!"

The both of you ran down the street as fast as you could, stopping when you saw Evie in the driveway. Steve ran into her. "Hey, babe!" He greets.

She wrapped her arms around him, then madeout with him. Her eyes were glued to you as she pushed his hands down past her waist. You shifted on your feet.

"Uh, Steve. I'll see ya...I guess." You say, walking back down the road towards your house.

~ ~ ~ ~

The next day, you met Steve at his locker. "Hey, Steve-O! Wanna hang out at my house after school?"

He turned to you slowly. "Uh, y/n, I wish I could, but Evie wants me to go dancing with her."

"Why? You got two left feet." You joke, punching his arm.

He gave you a toothy grin.

"Well, uh, how 'bout tomorrow?" You ask.

"Evie wants me to help her with her homework."

"Well, are you gonna go drag racing with me this weekend?"

"I can't. Evie's havin' party and I promised I'd help her set up and she wants me there and she-"

This frustrated you. "Y'know what? It's fine." You headed down the hall and you heard Steve run after you.

"Hey, you can't be mad at me." He laughed.

"Why the hell not?"

He realized you weren't joking. "Hey. You're seriously mad?"

"I just don't understand how you could just blow off your best friend! Steve, can I tell you something?" You didn't wait for a response. "Evie hates me! And I hate her! I don't even know what you see in her!"

Steve balled up his fists. "How 'bout you shut the hell up, y/n! You don't know anything! You're just jealous!"

"I am jealous! Because she's taking away one of my only friends! And you don't even care!" You pushed him.

"Why should I?"

You stood speechless.

"She's my girlfriend and she'll always come before anyone else!" He huffed. "Including you!" He walked away from you.

~ ~ ~ ~

You were friendless for a week. Then another week. And another. The words Steve said rang in your head.

She's my girlfriend and she'll always come before anyone else! Including you! You frowned at the thought.

You were walking home from school alone. It was the middle of September and you knew that if Steve were there, he'd be throwing wet leaves at you and placing his cold fingertips against your neck. You smiled at that thought. Your life seemed so boring without Steve in it. It made you sick.

At home, you found a letter from your parents. They'd be staying the night at a hotel because your dad had a work meeting first thing in the morning. You sighed, then worked on your homework. You were struggling in math, a subject Steve excelled in. You wished he was there to help you out.

After skipping over homework, you watched tv, then decided to take a shower.

~ ~ ~ ~

Your hair dripped with cold water. You wore an oversized t-shirt and shorts. You grabbed a cup of water and went into your living room to watch the news.

When the forecast came on, there was a knock at your front door. It was an urgent knock, so you hurried. And when it opened, you couldn't believe your eyes.

Steve had blood running from his nose and down your shirt. He had a black eye and busted lip. The both of you stared at each other.

"Can I come in?" He asks.

You stood dumbfounded, then after a while, you moved outta the way.

You found yourself in the bathroom with Steve and a first aid kit. You were on the counter and Steve stood in front of you, propping himself up. His hands were on either side of you on the counter as you wiped the blood off the rest of his face.

You sighed. "Take your shirt off." You tell him.

"Why?" He replied with a slight smirk.

"Don't worry I won't try anything." You spat. "I just need to get the blood out of it." You weren't amused with him.

He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it at you. Without looking him in the face, you grabbed it and hopped off the counter. You ran his shirt under the sink water. As you worked on the stain, Steve watched you. "Evie and I broke up." He states.

You shook your head. "Awesome." You say plainly.

He could see your reflection in the mirror and was frustrated. "Hey, what the hell's wrong with you?! I thought you wanted me to break up with Evie!"

"Yeah. Well, I don't care anymore. Do whatever you want."

He turned you around forcefully. "Y/n, I came here for you! I came here to see you!"

You looked up at him and started crying. You wiped the tears off your face. "What? You wanna see me now? After you were a dick to me and told me that I didn't matter?"

"Y/n, I just-"

"Don't worry about it." Your voice broke.

You left the room, trying to contain your crying. You headed to your room fast and knew Steve followed. You took a seat on your bed, covering you face.

"I'm sorry, y/n." He took a seat beside you and pulled you into him. "C'mon, y/n. Don't cry."

You looked back at him, and then hugged him. He held you close, your tears falling onto his bare chest as he rubbed circles on your back. "I hate you, Steve." You whimpered.

"I know, y/n." He sighed. "And I don't blame you. I really needed to see you, to talk to you."

"About what?" You hiccup, looking up at him.

"I...I love you. And I don't mean in, like, a brotherly way. I mean, like, I had to see you, y'know. And I missed you and-"

You pressed your lips against his, bringing your hands up to cup his face. He pulled you onto his lap and even closer to him.

The kiss tasted like metal. From the traces of blood in his mouth. You wanted to pull away from him and tell him a joke. You wanted to say anything you could to make this bizarre moment easier for you to digest. But you didn't. Instead, your hand ran through Steve's hair and you savored the taste of metal.

You felt Steve's hands run up and down your thighs and rest on your waist as he leaned further and further into you. You were thinking of things. Of all these weeks where Steve was gone. How it left you empty and hurt. And you supposed that you felt so empty because of the love you had for him.

And maybe that's why it hurt when he blew you off for Evie. And soon you felt more tears on your face, so you pulled away from Steve and looked him over.

You wanted to make fun of him. You wanted to tease him for coming over here and confessing his love for you. You wanted to call him names for being an asshole, but all those thoughts left your mind when you thought of what he said.

I love you.

You smiled back at him. "I love you, too."

~ ~ ~ ~

@darrycurtisappreciation @darrybutgay @ponydoyourhomework @ponyboyvhs @visualranch @hufflepuffpridedude @omni-hamiltrash @salladwinston @unique05sstuff @starryrevelations @allan-sodapapi @mocurlyshepard @mushrooms-iscat @yawannaseewhatshangingbaby

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Grace & Ali

Sad, sad times

Grace: Please don't start drama but I do have something to tell you Grace: hopefully you'll be happy about it but I know dad won't be so I'm doing it here Grace: Not sorry mum Grace: Anyway the news is that you're gonna be a 👵 again! So exciting Grace: 👼💙💜 Ali: Hold up for one second Ali: How do you know? Have you been to the Drs? You didn't need to do that alone, Grace Grace: I took a couple of tests no need to hold my hand through that mum Ali: Those tests are less certain than that birth control we got you on for a reason Ali: Don't be taking the result as gospel yet Ali: And have you thought about this, properly? You don't even know this boy, so who knows what help he'd be if any, and you're nowhere near done with School, what about all your plans? How does a baby fit in with them? Grace: I'm not stupid, I've got loads of symptoms like Grace: yeah but I don't need him anyway it'll only be a bonus if he stays Grace: You managed so can I Ali: Okay, well, we'll get you an emergency appointment today, you have to deal with these things head-on Ali: It isn't a bonus, Grace, if a child is made by two people, it needs both of those people on its team, needs to know they care Ali: You know that, its all well and good to say otherwise, and ultimately, its your choice, but pretending no one else is involved or will have an effect is stupid, and you aren't repeating my mistakes Ali: Not to mention, our situations were different, we're different people, you have to do what is right for you, now, and you really need to think about what you're going to want a year from now, 18, 'cos its your whole life changed forever Grace: She wasn't a mistake, mum Grace: and neither is my baby Grace: I'm just saying if he's not happy about this, I am and I'll have plenty of people around to help me if he won't Grace: So don't be mad at me, okay? I need you to talk down round Ali: I'm not saying she was Ali: but she was undeniably a very unhappy little girl and I wouldn't wish the guilt I feel for my part in it on anyone, least of all you, any of my children, okay? Ali: You know you have both our support no matter what Ali: But, give yourself time to think about this properly, okay? Ali: You know you rushed things with Harry Grace: Did you say all this to Billie or does she get a free pass for being across the pond? Grace: Maybe it's just me because you don't think I can do this. Well fine Grace: I can and will. You'll see mum Ali: Hey now, of course I did, your different people in different situations but I still told her what she needed to hear, too Ali: What are you trying to prove, Grace, and to who? Ali: A child isn't a test, a chance to say fuck you to the world and everyone in it, you can't do that, it's not fair Grace: It's not fair that you're treating me like I'm 6 either Grace: I know you don't like Harry, but you should have a bit more of an idea about me by now Grace: If you can't be happy for me then don't but don't try and tell me what to do Ali: You're not acting like an adult at all right now, so don't expect me to treat you like one Ali: No one is trying to tell you what to do, Grace Ali: I'm telling you its your decision and you have to make it alone, and that's a terrifying and exciting prospect to a 16 year old all at once but if you can't handle the idea of doing that with a little bit of thought behind it then I don't know what to tell you Grace: I already have thought about it Grace: I wouldn't be telling you yet if I hadn't Ali: Okay, good. Ali: So, how are you going to provide childcare whilst you finish School? How are you going to afford the roughly 10 grand in the first year alone? Are you taking time off for the first 6 months, at least? How are you going to catch up? Ali: Talk to me Grace: I'll just leave school I'm rubbish at it anyway Ali: You are not Ali: but okay, what are you going to do for your career then? You can't get on the beauty course without at least seeing out this year and next Grace: I'll do my exams and stuff later if needs be Grace: It's not like I was going to get the beauty place so Grace: might as well have a rethink now instead of then Ali: Why not? Its vocational, you've got the talent most girls are going on that course to learn already, even if you don't get your 3Cs, which you're well on target for anyway, you can do your English and Maths alongside your course, they'll help you get them Ali: You just need to get the qualification out the way, then you can set up your own business if you want, but would you let someone without the certificate touch your face or hair? Ali: If you're having this baby, you need the money now, not later Grace: get over it, I am Grace: I'll just become a mummy blogger or whatever that's a skill I do have Ali: Don't be childish Ali: You might not want to tell me, whatever; but this is the sort of stuff you need to be sorted before the baby comes, end of Ali: How long do you need to do that before you've got your audience large enough for adsense? Which is pennies, you need to attract sponsors to really earn, for that you need to know how to negotiate, write and give proposals...then all that money comes in a chunk, you have to save wisely, budget Ali: Its a lottery, love, not impossible but not guaranteed Ali: You need guarantees in place Grace: excuse me for not having the next 40 years set in stone Grace: not like you and dad did so chill please Ali: No, no excuses Grace, they won't cut it Ali: We both knew what we wanted to do before any of you were born, and we were putting those plans into action Ali: Not only do you need this all set out and into motion, you'll have to do extra you didn't expect, didn't want to Ali: Begging favours left and right, working extra jobs on the side that you have no interest in but it covers the costs Ali: Its the hardest thing you'll ever do, and trust me, its a damn sight harder when the father doesn't pull his weight Grace: yeah well I didn't plan to have this baby and I haven't even told Harry yet Grace: Not sorry for not having everything figured out the second I got the result Ali: No, Grace, you ARE planning to have this baby Ali: you're doing it now, this is what I'm trying to tell you Ali: None of my pregnancies were 'planned', so few people's are Ali: but when you find out, you have to hit the ground running, the plan is being made, don't get swept up in panic or excitement or whatever emotion you're feeling, you can't afford to Ali: Are you going to tell him? Grace: Obviously, but like you said, I have to go to the doctor's first Grace: even if I know he'll want it confirmed Grace: want to know it's his too probably Ali: That's probably the best idea, yeah, got you in @5, okay? You can go in alone, if that's what you want Ali: Or if you want to bring one of your sisters, a friend, instead Ali: Well, I can't say anything on that, can I? I can see the merits but insulting, I'm sure Grace: I'll go on my own Mia's got a driving lesson so Grace: it's chill that's just what lads are like, esp when you haven't been coupled up long Ali: Is it? Ali: Chill, I mean Grace: yeah Grace: he's not used to keeping girls around before me that's all Grace: none at his school are loyal like Ali: I can see why Ali: Hardly inspires it, does he Grace: None of you know him well enough to be shady thanks Ali: Neither do you, Grace Ali: Come off it Grace: Don't start, mum Grace: I know enough Ali: I wish that were true Ali: but its yours to find out if you're not up for listening, can't blame you, I rarely did Grace: okay Grace: are you gonna tell dad? Ali: If you want me to Grace: Only if you make sure none of the others are around Ali: Of course, you can tell them all in your own time Grace: thanks Ali: No problem Ali: Anything else you need? Grace: No I'm fine Ali: Love you sweetheart Grace: Love you too 💜 Grace: No need to drag dad into my drama if you haven't already Grace: correct it to fake news otherwise Ali: Oh Grace, I'm so sorry Ali: Are you alright? Grace: yeah obviously Grace: not cut out for it anyway so Ali: Don't say that, I certainly didn't, you'll be a cracking mum one day Ali: Just not your time right now Grace: might as well've no need to backtrack now mum it's fine Grace: Not gonna be my time ever but there's always the beauty course for you to be buzzing about Ali: Don't put words in my mouth, especially not such nasty ones, that wasn't what I was saying at all, you know that Ali: What are you saying, Gracie? Grace: just what I said, you'll have to get your grandkids from the others Grace: plenty of us though so Ali: Hold on Ali: What did the Dr tell you? Grace: She said not only am I not having a baby now I can't have them. Ever Ali: Darling...I'm so sorry, that is, a lot for you to have to process now, too much Ali: And there's nothing I can say to make it better but where are you? You should come Home Grace: I'm fine where I am Grace: I'd rather be on my own anyway Ali: Okay but I don't think you should be Ali: Are you with Mia? Ali: Harry? Grace: No Grace: they'd only want to know what's up Ali: Of course... and you don't have to tell anyone, but I'm glad you told me. You shouldn't have to shoulder this alone, you don't need to, please come find me when you're ready Grace: No need mum I'm fine and like you said, there's nothing you can say Ali: I know Ali: But we can be there, we are Ali: When you're ready Grace: The doctor handled it I've got more info than I wanna read thanks Ali: I'm not going to lecture you, God, what kind of monster do you- Ali: The Doctor isn't your family Ali: I'd be a shittier Mum than I am if I didn't let it be known, even though that's all I've got to offer Grace: You've had loads of kids and could have more tomorrow if you wanted so excuse me if I don't come crying to you about something you'll never understand Grace: None of you can help me with this Ali: I know Ali: I know we can't Ali: Won't stop us trying, though, I'm sorry Grace: Save it for someone else's drama Grace: I don't need it Ali: I wish with everything I could give you what you need but I can't Ali: I just can't Ali: Stay safe, okay? Grace: I'm sure I already radiate enough saddo vibes to keep everyone at a safe distance Grace: is it okay if I stay at Mia's? Ali: That isn't true Ali: Of course, I'm glad you can have a friend around you, take as long as you need Grace: thanks, I'll come and get some of my stuff later but I can't deal with Janis thinking I'm moping because Harry dumped me or whatever Ali: Okay darling Ali: I get it Ali: She would be there if she knew, you know Ali: but you don't have to tell anyone Grace: she's a bitch mum Grace: and she hates me so like no way Ali: She doesn't hate you, not really, you just have your differences Grace: 🙄 I'll believe her instead of you thanks since she tells me enough Ali: We all say things we don't mean Ali: Especially when we're angry Grace: 🙄 Grace: anything else cringey you wanna add Ali: You know its true Ali: I love you so bloody much Ali: How's that? Grace: 💗 Grace: thanks for not telling anyone Grace: Mia's mum is always gossiping with her friends about everything Grace: I'd die if anyone found out about any of this Ali: Well, we'll both thank our lucky stars I'm not anything like Mia's Mum then, ay? Ali: It is nothing to be ashamed of, okay? Don't you ever think that, its okay to be heartbroken or furious at the world, God and me and everyone else who takes it for granted but don't you be ever ashamed, there's nothing wrong with you and there's a million ways to be a mum if that's what you decide you want still Ali: But you don't owe anyone an explanation, either Ali: I'll tell Dad, yeah? But that's as far as it goes Grace: I'm scared though and not just because the pharmacy woman is gossipy af Grace: The doctor was saying all this horrible stuff Ali: I know, well, I think I do...but we can talk it over when you come Home, or I'll come meet you for coffee in town or whatever and we can go through it all together Ali: Those leaflets are a bit scaremongery, but they have to be, cover their bases, I promise we will sort this so you don't have to be afraid of it and get you any help you might need Grace: Can you meet me soon? I don't think I can face Mia and not talk about this until I've talked about it Grace: Stupid I know but Ali: Not at all Ali: I'll come right now, we can sit in the car, have fish and chips if you like Grace: Thanks mum, sorry I was such a bitch before Ali: Nah, not at all, I don't need to be cringe and tell you we all say things when we're scared too, do I? Grace: 😂 Grace: You were right about me rushing the baby thing, I was, I just wanted it so much Ali: I know sweetheart, I know Ali: and I have been there, I really wasn't trying to be a hypocritical cow about it Ali: One day, I promise Grace: I know I shouldn't have pinned my hopes on it but everyone else has something Grace: I don't and I can't even mess everything up the same as the rest of you Ali: You're 16, Gracie, you don't have to even fake having it together like you would if you were having a baby right now Ali: and a terrible thing happened to us all Ali: the others are struggling too, doesn't downgrade or touch on your own, and I'm not saying it to act like it should Ali: but you really aren't alone in being not okay right now, not at all Ali: as much as it might pain me, its the truth of it Grace: I wish we could all go back and do it over Ali: Me too Ali: but, we can't, we've got to find a way to push through or we'll all be stuck Ali: none of us want that, do we? she wouldn't want it for us either Grace: but I don't know how to talk to any of the others anymore, especially Janis Grace: I miss them Grace: We used to tell each other everything Ali: Me either...I don't think Janis wants to be talked to anymore, not by anyone, all we can do is be there waiting when she does. I know it hurts. Ali: I know you do Ali: We all miss each other Ali: We got blown apart, but I have to believe we'll find our way back one day Ali: I know we all want to, I really do know that Grace: I keep thinking if I sit here long enough of my own, Edie'll pop up like she used to do Grace: She never came to me but, maybe this time because it's all so unfair already Grace: So stupid Ali: You can try talking to her, if you like Ali: One of the only alright things about it, you can get her to appear whenever you like Ali: if you're stupid then I'm absolutely daft Grace: She'd get it I think how I feel Ali: I reckon she would too Ali: She was a lot wiser than she let on Ali: Than people gave credit for Grace: Yeah Grace: Do I have to tell Harry any of this? ugh Grace: about me I mean, not how messed up the rest of us are Ali: No Ali: he's got no need to know, its none of his business unless you wanted the emotional support, that's the only reason Grace: But what if it changes everything he wasn't here to get with a 👵 Ali: If it changes anything he's a piece of shit Ali: not to mention, he didn't even know he was about to be a daddy so I don't think its a dream dashed for him Grace: yeah but all these side effects like, might as well be dating nan Grace: ugh I hate this Ali: I think nan's got enough boy drama with granddad, still, like Ali: Its shit, really shit but manageable Ali: You're stronger than this, millions of girls live with it and its not stopping them living to the fullest, so like fuck it will you Ali: Do you want me to sly ask Ro? See if she has any Doctor know-how, no more leaflets required Grace: She won't let it slip to anyone will she? Ali: Nah, 'course not Ali: Confidentiality, she'd never break her oath #goodytwoshoes Ali: and I'm pretty creative, I've asked her much stranger questions than this before now Grace: cool Grace: ask her then Grace: It was hard to take it all in earlier Ali: It would be Ali: Nothing prepares you but Drs are notoriously bad at even trying, like Ali: Right, now leaving work, where do you want me to pick you up from? Grace: I'll meet you there, anywhere but the CG obvs Grace: I wanna walk Ali: Cool, I'll text you when I'm here 💚 Grace: Love you 💜 Ali: Love you too