#I decided to tage a page out if my own book but that's a hard subject to keep light

[antimony-ore]

Starting to rewatch Gravity Falls helped get my creative juices flowing, I remembered my villain will seem darker if I keep the rest if the narative a little silly.

[dillydedalus]

what i read in february

check to find out if i defeated my nemesis thomas mann by reading the magic mountain or surrendered to his absolute rule over my unread books shelf

milkman, anna burns this is deeply divisive on the bookish internet apparently with fights over a) whether it’s brilliant or garbage, b) whether it’s difficult, c) whether literary difficulty is a moral issue (with both renouncers-of-milkman and defenders-of-milkman variously taking either side). here’s my lukewarm take: a) it’s good, b) it’s not that difficult but can be frustrating to read, c) it’s not a moral issue, like, obvi. anyway, y’all probably know what this is about (girl in belfast during the troubles finds herself stalked by dangerous paramilitary, gossip & violence abound). i found the decision not to use proper names, either for the characters (narrator is middle sister, other characters are ‘maybe-boyfriend’, ‘wee sisters’, ‘third brother-in-law’, etc) or the setting really interesting - it added both to the conversational feel, the paranoia in the community and the universality of themes like civil violence, paranoia, mistrust, sexual harrassment, pressure to conform etc. 4/5

paradise, a.l. kennedy (uni) idk man this is well-written and especially the writing about drunkenness & the depth of hannah’s addiction & misery (and joy, which kennedy does not avoid) is vivid, but i’m still p meh on it, and it was definitely too long for what it was doing. i’ll add more after the class where we’ll discuss it (update: the class was unfortunately a mess so I’m still ehhh about it) 2.5/5

die verängstigten, dima wannous (tr. from arabic) an english translation, the frightened ones, is coming out some time this year i think. this story is told thru two narratives, one by sulaima, a syrian woman with anxiety living in damascus, whose brother has been disappeared by the regime and whose lover nassim has fled the country, and one thru chapters of the unfinished novel nassim leaves behind for sulaima, narrated by a girl called salma, whose life story mirrors sulaima’s own. this is a very interesting set-up, and i think both the narrative structure and the combination of anxiety as a psychological illness and anxiety/paranoia as a social state caused by political repression & violence were really interesting, but sometimes the book felt a bit muddled and confusing to me. 3/5

der schlaf der gerechten, wolfgang hilbig (the sleep of the righteous) this is a collection of connected short stories set in a mining town in east germany - the first 4 stories follow the narrator figure (who’s not necessarily the same, but very similar throughout all stories) as a child and young adult, growing up in a town almost without men after world war 2, whereas the last 3 describe the narrator’s return to this town as an adult after reunification, struggling with his own and east germany’s past. i ADORED the first stories - they are insanely good, dark, atmospheric, beautifully written and so evocative of the materiality of this town, the ash, the coal, moulding fruit, gritty, grimy, ash coating everything (the blurb on the back says that your hands will come away from the pages stained with soot, and i feel that). the second set is good too, but it moves away from that sensual evocation which i loved so much. 4/5

the golden fool (tawny man #2), robin hobb y’all i really tried to read this one slowly, and it worked for four days but then i decided that i might as well read read the entire second half in one day so. anyway this is hard to talk about w/o spoiling a lot but robin hobb truly is the queen of character writing. loved the elliania plot, loved the coterie forming, loved the bingtown delegation, loved fitz and the fool having Feelings Drama (made me Big Sad tho - also fitz is my son & all but good god he can be a dumbass). i feel like this one’s mostly setting everything up for fool’s fate but it’s good. 4/5

the sixth extinction: an unnatural history, elizabeth kolbert engaging & accessible nonfiction book about extinction, including both past extinction events, the history of science about extinction and focusing on the current extinction event (with several example species, from frogs to rhinos) mostly caused by humans fucking everything up. 3/5

the course of the heart, m john harrison tbh i just didn’t get it.... maybe i’m not versed enough in gnosticism & weird esoteric shit. anyway, this is about three friends haunted by some spiritual ritual (lol) they held while at uni with a sinister guy called yaxley. you never find out what they actually did, but they construct a whole mythology about it that i uh. didn’t get. tbh i pretty much checked out halfway thru. 1.5/5

barracoon: the story of the last “black cargo”, zora neale hurston (audio) interesting & sad & really touching account of cudjo lewis, one of the last africans to be shipped to america as slaves, mainly made up of his own narrative, collected & put together by hurston. some interesting background info about how the book came to be as well. 3/5

how to survive a plague, david france in-depth account of the aids epidemic in the us, especially in new york, combining personal stories, insight into aids activism, scientific progress (and for most of the book, lack thereof) and staggering political neglect and failure. well-written, informative and well-explained but (obviously) very emotionally draining.  4/5

fool’s fate (the tawny man #3), robin hobb lmao i love emotionally dying about robin hobb books. anyway A LOT happens in this one & i was very emotional about most of it but most emotional about fitzchivalry farseer (idiot, son boy, changer) and the fool (beloved!) and my man burrich (lol say the words ‘heart of the pack’ & i’m already overwhelmed). anyway this was a very epic & hardcore emotional conclusion to this series & robin hobb may make me cry any time she wishes. 4/5, series rating 4.5/5

what it means when a man falls from the sky, lesley nneka arimah collection of short stories mostly set in nigeria and in the us. some of the stories are magical realist-y, some are more realist, but almost all are concerned with familial bonds and bondage, the complicated relationships between parents and children. the stories are well-executed and precisely told, but while i liked quite a few of the stories (esp. the title story) i just didn’t feel particularly strongly about most of them. 3/5

heimsuchung, jenny erpenbeck (visitation) another interesting take on 20th century german history from erpenbeck - this one is centred around a house by a lake in brandenburg & told thru the various people connected to the house over the years & decades, owners, visitors, neighbours, etc. it’s an interesting concept & well-executed & clever & erpenbeck can write but it kinda paled for me in comparison to her aller tage abend, which does a similar thing in very different way. 3/5

currently reading: look okay i have Not finished the magic mountain but i am still reading it so i still have a chance of defeating mann in single combat. i’m actually kinda liking it but it’s A Lot, so i’m taking it slow. also call me zebra which i am v v...... unsure about??