#I am one hundred percent sure this is a bad idea and will end with both of us dead but let't do this

[yoongsriverandme]

✩︵ 주문 — MIROTIC!

❝ You want me, you've fallen for me You're crazy about me, you can't escape me I got you under my skin (Ooh) … ❞

��� pairing: like crazy!park jimin x shy fem!reader

⤑ genre: smut, fluff, angst, rom-comy vibes, friends-with-benefits, s2l2f2l (they did some things out of order), idiots to lovers, college!au, fuckboy!au, reverse harem, mutual pining, "unrequited love," she fell first but he fell harder.

⤑ wc: 9.3k

⤑ summary: sleeping with your long-time crush was not how planned to confess your undying love to him, but if it was the only way you could be close to him then so be it. jimin's had a lot of lovers, and you're one of them, but why the fuck is he so bothered by the thought of you being with someone else?

⤑ rating: nsfw/explicit - proceed with caution!

⤑ warnings: fuck boy!jimin, popular "it" boy!jimin, shy "loser" girl!reader, lowkey toxic!jimin (i'm not sorry!), making out, bathroom sex, public sex, exhibitionism, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, A LOT of dirty talk, kinda shitty aftercare sorry, protected sex (pocket condoms 😓), JEALOUS jimin like holy shit, possessiveness, angst for a min, heavy pining, feelings realization, miscommunication, arguing, emotionally constipated!jimin, love confessions, angst with a happy ending (sorry nammy :/), not everyone gets a cameo this time sighs sadly.

⤑ date posted: march 9, 2025

⤑ authors note: HEY HEY HEY!!! bet you guys didn't expect this one!!! (i didn't either, random inspo struck me), but literally every single idea i've ever posted about IS sitting in drafts, and this one has been halfway done for weeks, so i figured i'd put it out there as i work on some of my other bigger pieces!

i ALSO just wanted to pop in here and say WOW, thank you so much for your support like... the feedback for my account has been phenomenal, and i want you all to know how touched i am!

with that out of the way, i hope you guys enjoy this fwb!au because wow was this a big one!

𓈒 ꪆৎ masterlist

⁘ preface: i only use bts as face claims! they are my muses, so anything they say or do, do not reflect their real life character!

The first time you ever talked to Jimin was when you had sex with him.

Now you know that sounds bad! 

But you had no idea what to do when he had come to you as you hovered awkwardly against one of the walls in the house party you had been forced to attend.

You were the designated driver for all intents and purposes, so the red solo cup that you had clasped in your hand was nothing but plain sprite, which was used as a mixer. 

‘Quite the devilish combination’ You couldn’t help but think as you swirled the carbonated liquid around boredly.

The room was stifling, filled to the brim with inebriated, sweaty bodies.

You were surrounded by sex, drugs and alcohol, some couples impatiently groping each other in the corner closests to you, and you forced yourself to look down, your cheeks warm at the blatant show of… affection.

It stunk, the music was too loud, and there were so many places you would rather be than here, like back home in your dorm studying, or watching an episode of your favorite show.

You didn’t fit into places like this, and you were one-hundred percent sure you had that fact stamped to your forehead.

The only pleasant part about this whole experience had been being able to see Jimin.

He was quite popular, and worlds away from you, but you couldn’t help but harbor a school yard crush on the pretty boy. 

He was just… tantalizing, with the way he spoke to the way he always held himself with a slight air of seduction. Boys and girls alike were ready to drop to their knees with so much as a word from the man, and you’re ashamed to say that you’re no different.

It was embarrassing, really, with how hard and fast you fell in love with somebody you barely knew, but he shared so much of himself, you felt as though you knew enough.

You know he’s funny, and kind, despite the… whorish, reputation that precedes him.

You’re in no place to judge, truly, because if he were to come up to you right now asking you if you would like to have sex with him, you would say yes.

“Lame party, right?” Sounds a voice from beside you.

You jump ten feet in the air, a bit of your drink spilling out over the edge of the cup as you fumble to keep the damn thing still in your hand.

“Uh – yes?” You answer with a slight grimace, your stomach drops to your ass when said host appears next to you.

Park fucking Jimin.

This was not what you meant! Not so suddenly! Not like this!

You stare at him dumbly as you spiral, and a small smirk tugs at the corner of his plush lips.

“You think?” He asks teasingly.

You instantly stumble to recover from your mistake. “No! Yes, no, I… I just –” You’re blubbering like an idiot, and Jimin seems to take great pleasure at reducing you to a flustered mess, but he relents with a laugh.

“”M just kidding.”

“No! I just… I’m not used to going to this sort of thing.”

“Oh?” Jimin questions with a raised brow. 

You put your drink on the small refreshment table next to you so you can wring your hands together as a nervous tick.

“I’m my friend's designated driver for the night, and they knew I wouldn’t be doing anything, so…”

“That’s selfless of you.” He compliments, and warmth spreads from the roots of your hair all the way to the tips of your toes. “Ah,” You try to wave him off. “It’s… it’s nothing. I don’t mind.”

“But also that makes sense.” Your brows furrow. “What makes sense?” You ask.

He bombards your space, hooded eyelids giving you a once over.

You’re suddenly very aware of how dirty and scruffed your converses are, and you fidget a bit under his scrutinizing gaze.

“That you haven’t come to one of my parties before, because I’d recognize your pretty face anywhere.”

Your eyes widened.

Holy shit. Was he hitting on you?

“Oh!” You laugh nervously. “That’s… that’s very sweet of you.” You gulp.

His smirk only gets deeper, and he leans closer so that his breath caresses the shell of your ear. If his intention is for you to be able to hear him over the music, he’s doing beyond a wonderful job at succeeding.

Your eyelids flutter rapidly, and your hands shake, and you have no idea where to put them as you lean back slightly.

“What do you say we go somewhere else?” He asks with a purr, pulling away just enough to gauge your reaction to his proposition.

Now, you’re not an easy girl. Jimin may sleep with anyone he wants, but you’re just not into that sort of thing, and you know better than to –

“Yes, please.” It comes out as a slight whimper, but he hears you nonetheless, because he takes you by the hand and pulls you through the throngs of people.

Your stomach is tied up in knots, and you’re not even sure if you’re still connected to reality.

Instead of taking you upstairs and into his room like you thought he would, he redirects you into the hallway and into the door, and your stomach drops slightly when he turns on the light to reveal a bathroom.

‘It’s nice’ You try to convince yourself, but your train of thought is cut off when a pair of heavy hands lay themselves on your jean-covered hips, pulling you closer to his body and trailing his lips up the side of your neck.

Your breath hitches and you let out a small, “Oh.”

“Do you still want this?” He murmurs into your ear once more, and you find yourself nodding rather enthusiastically, much to your embarrassment. Jimin just chuckles.

He spins you around, and your eyes land on the slope of his neck that disappears into his leather jacket. Fingers tuck themselves under your chin and force you to look at him.

“You’re a shy one.” He coos, and you shiver when his thumb caresses the corner of your mouth, dipping into it just a bit.

“I’m not used to this.” You admit with a self-deprecating grimace. “What a shame.” Is all he says before tilting your head back and connecting your lips.

The kiss is soft, softer than you would have expected from your soon to be hookup.

You’ve heard through the grapevine that he’s rather ferocious with his kissing, with spit and teeth, but somehow still making sure it's nice for his partner.

He cups your wrists and guides your hands to tangle themselves in his black mullet, and you’re relieved to be able to do something with your hands.

A whimper escapes you when his palms press you to him by the lower part of your back, turning you to the nearest wall for balance.

Soon, the kiss turns hungry, and you can feel the strain of him against his tight black pants, and you tremble, like putty in his hands.

You try your best to keep up with him, kissing back with a lot more fervour than you’ve ever done before.

You’ve had sex once, and that was just because you wanted to lose it before college, just so you could say you did it.

It was awkward because it was with one of the guys from your English class, and he looked like he didn’t know what he was doing either. It was stiff and it burned, and you weren’t sure if you were even turned on enough to participate in penetrative sex.

Well, the same can’t be said for you now, because you can feel the material of your panties grow damp with arousal, sticking to your folds and causing slight friction.

It’s when Jimin finally rolls his hips into yours is when you finally let out a true, loud moan.

“Thought you were going to be quiet all night.” Jimin teases, and you flush. “I - I’m sorry.” You mutter against his lips. 

He pulls back and strokes your cheek with the back of his knuckles. “Relax. ‘M just teasing.”

“Right, right.” You laugh demurely.

He lowers his head to the skin of your neck where he takes the skin of it between his teeth, and your hips buck into his on accident.

“Shit!” You curse, and you slap a hand over your mouth. “You like pain.” He says almost to himself. “Definitely noted.” 

You’re not sure what he means by that, but your mind seems to blank when his hands sneak their way to the button of your jeans, fiddling with the metal. That cursed thumb presses into the skin above the hem.

“Do you still want this?” 

“Yes, please.” You whimper. Jimin grins and you can feel it, because he places a gentle kiss on the surface. “How polite.”

You swallow a whine at his praise.

He pops them open with practiced ease, and pushes a hand into your pants, hissing when he comes in contact with your wetness.

“Fuck, you’re this wet just from kissing?” He asks in awe.

Jimin finally finds himself in your panties and you gasp when the tips of his fingers press on your clit.

“There it is.” He says to himself triumphantly.

He’s quick to flatten his hand, replacing the tips with the pads of his fingers, drawing quick but fast circles over the pleasurable bud.

“Jimin!” You cry, and your nails rake themselves through his hair, drawing him into you.

You hold him close as he rubs at you, and his free hand keeps himself balanced on the wall just above your hand, completely enveloping you with his body.

“Feels so good.” You mewl, and he nearly growls.

“God, you’re so cute.” He groans.

He takes his hand away and your eyes furrowed in confusion. Was it something you said?

You don't have much time to think because you’re being spun around and bent over the counter, and you’re face to face with your debauched features. 

“Jimin?” You ask, but you’re cut off by him snatching your pants and underwear down your hips and they pool at your ankles. 

You threaten to turn a scarlet red when he spreads your legs as far as they can go and just stares at your sex.

“Such a pretty pussy.” He rasps and you shiver.

He looks up and meets your gaze in the mirror, making to take his leather jacket off.

“‘M gonna fuck you with my fingers, then I’m actually gonna fuck you. Sounds good?”

“Amazing.” You squeak.

He presses his hand on your lower back to keep you anchored to the marble counter, while the other slips a finger in till he reaches the knuckle.

Your jaw drops in a silent moan, the slight stretch of it hurts for a moment, but your body soon adjusts to it, because he draws it out, no wonder noticing how it glistens in the dim lighting.

Then, he thrusts it back in, over and over and over again until a second one finds its place next to it.

The sounds that escape your cunt are disgusting, and you cross your arms to bury your head in them. 

You’ve never felt pleasure like this before, and when he curls his fingers just right, you all but wail.

“Found it.” 

He abuses your g-spot with a certain kind of cruelty, and an arm slips out from under you to scratch at the surface of the counter. Of course you don’t leave any marks, but the bluntness of your nails make it a makeshift anchor to this earth.

“Just listen to you.” He huffs. “She’s so sloppy.”

“Don’t – don’t say that.” You whine in humiliation. 

“Why not?” There’s amusement in his voice, and you hate how it makes another of arousal leak around his digits.

“‘Cause that’s dirty.” 

Jimin laughs. He actually fucking laughs and all you can think about is crawling into a hole forever.

“There’s a lot about me that’s dirty, sweetheart.”

You shake at the nickname, and he notices.

“Oh? You like it when I call you that?”

The condescension in his voice pushes you closer to the edge, and you can feel that familiar knot form in your stomach, the one you’re only able to create by yourself.

You clench around him and he gawffs.

“It seems like I’m not the only one that’s dirty.” He remarks. “What else should I call you?” He acts like he’s thinking as he twists his wrist into you without mercy, your legs shake.

There’s tears threatening to stream down your face.

“Hm. What about babe, or baby? Oh! Better yet, how about darling? Hm? Would you like that darling?”

Hearing him call you such sweet names does something to you, because before you know it, you’re catapulted over the edge. You spasm around him, and he just hums.

“There you go, good girl. That’s it.”

You shake as you come down from your high, and there are hands stroking the outside of your thighs, up your hips, and back down again.

Your eyes flutter open from where they squeezed themselves shut to find he’s already looking at you. His gaze is dripping in dark black molasses sticky with lust and want.

“Can we keep going, or are you at your limit?” Jimin checks in ever so gently. 

It makes you feel good knowing that he likes to make sure you know you’re still in control, and despite just having orgasmed, you find yourself painstakingly empty.

“‘M really good.” You slur, and a proud smile takes over his face.

He fumbles with the back of his jeans, and retrieves his wallet where he pulls out a condom from it. You eye it warily.

“I just put it in there yesterday, I promise.”

He makes work of his jeans, and you notice that he’s so so hard, and you almost feel bad for the poor man. Almost being the keyword, because when he releases himself from the confines of his boxers, you gape.

He’s averagely long, maybe even a little moreso, but god, is he thick.

He catches you staring and winks.

“Think you can take it?” He pokes and you huff. “Of course I can.”

He raises a brow at you, but rolls the condom on in a tortuously slow pace.

“Hurry up.” You whine, and he swats your ass.

“Be patient.” He chides with a hiss, but you’re still reeling from the sting of the slap to even comprehend what he just said.

Jimin settles a hand on your shoulder, the other helping him line himself up to your sopping wet entrance.

“Ready?” 

“Mhm.”

You both watch each other as he splits you open on his cock, and his head falls back as he groans through his clenched teeth.

“Oh!” You quiver on his length, reaching back to grab one of his hands and breathing out a sigh of relief when he meets you halfway.

He’s twitching inside of you, and you appreciate the few moments to gather your bearings.

“Move, please.” You mewl, and he doesn’t hesitate to listen to you.

Jimin drags himself out, breaking your eye contact to look down at where you’re wrapped around him. You’re so wet, the velvet of your gummy walls are making him feel a little faint.

Then, he thrusts back in until his hips are to your ass, and then he repeats, just for a few slow moments before picking up the pace.

The hand on shoulder pulls you down to meet his thrusts, and you cry out.

“Shit, Jimin!” 

“I know, I know – Fuck, you feel so good.”

His plowing is brutal, the tip of his cock spearing and bullying your g-spot with a pace that you can’t quite keep up with.

He releases your shoulder to grab each arm to help his leverage, and your eyes roll into the back of your head. You’re sure you’re drooling, but you can’t find much shame in it because it feels so good.

You know that Jimin has ruined you for anybody else, mind, body, and soul, and you’re not sure how you’re supposed to escape him now.

His grunts and groans are guttural, and you know he’s close. You encourage him by clenching around him.

“God – what happened to the shy girl I met in the living room, huh?” He pants. “All I see now a cock hungry slut.”

You let out a surprised moan at his words.

“Oh, yeah? You like when I call you that? Like when I let you know exactly what you look like?”

“Y-yes.” Is your garbled reply.

“Aw… is my baby too cock drunk to even respond?” Jimin tuts meanly. “That’s okay, because I’ve got you, right?”

He’s giving you whiplash with the mix of his words, and you miss the way he calls you his baby.

“Oh, shit I’m close.” He announces. “You gonna let me cum in this tight little cunt of yours?”

“Mhm! Mhm! Gonna –” You hiccup. “Gonna let you do whatever you want.

That seems to soothe something possessive inside of him because he finally cums, and the pulsing of him against that spongy spot inside of you grows to be too much, because you follow right behind him.

It’s quiet in the bathroom as you both stop to catch your breaths, but he pulls out after a few moments of silence, tying up the condom and tossing it into the trashcan next to the toilet without a care.

“You okay?” He asks as he makes to pull up his jeans, and you’re kind of just… stunned.

Is that it?

“Uh… yeah, I’m alright.” You try not to let the disappointment show on your face as you reach down and tug your pants on as well.

Your arms ache from the strange position they were forced into, as well as your stomach from where it had been digging into the ledge of the counter.

“Good.” Gently pushes you out the way so he can wash his hands.

You just stare at him flabbergasted, kind of at a complete loss at what to say.

Do you ask what you are now? Did this mean anything? Were you just another hookup? Were you –

You’re cut off by soft lips meeting yours, and your stomach flutters something pleasant.

Maybe he did like you back and this was a complete misunderstanding, maybe he –

“Call me if you’d like to have some fun again, yeah?”

He speaks against your mouth.

Somehow he’s managed to scribble down his number and hand it to you, which you take somewhat blindly.

He’s already out of the door before you can blink, sending you a cheeky wave as he disappears into the crowd once more.

Your experience with him already feels like a dream when one of your friends drapes themselves over you.

“Finally found you!” She says with a giggle. “Where were you? Me and Sana have been looking everywhere.”

You cringe as you remember your duty, but before you can respond, her nose scrunches up.

“God you stink. Did you have sex?” She asks in disgust.

“No.” You say with a few blinks. “It’s probably because of the party.”

“Oh… okay.” She giggles.

You’re ashamed to say you’ve met up with him a few times after that, finally having the courage to give him a call after a particularly hard day of finals.

He sure did fuck the stress out of you.

This wasn’t how you imagined yourself finding your way into his world, but if sex was the only way you could have him then so be it.

But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

He still met up with other girls, still blew you off, still kept you as a secret from his friends. You were just another notch on his bedpost, and it made you almost sick to think about.

Time spent with him after sex was just… confusing.

Someday’s he would allow you to stay over afterwards, maybe even asking you to watch a movie with him, or sometimes he would talk around you leaving until you eventually caught the hint.

It was such a push and pull relationship, and you had no idea what all of this was for.

Were you friends? Acquaintances? Fuck buddies? Friends with benefits?

You had no idea what you were or who he wanted to mean to you, but it was slowly ripping you apart.

He had invited you to another party after a particularly long session, and maybe it was just the sleepiness in him talking, but it almost sounded as if he wanted you to be there.

He nuzzles his face into your shoulder, the black of his hair sticking to his forehead due to the sweat.

You nibble on your lip, tugging the duvet up to cover your bare breasts.

The tips of his fingers graze your arm gently even though his eyes were closed, and goosebumps rose under his ministrations.

It was moments like these that you grew fond of because of how few and far in between they were, when Jimin allows that vulnerable side of his to peek through. You found him beautiful.

You couldn’t stop staring at him, even when the muscles in your neck protested the awkward angle.

You could count every freckle on his cheek, every eyelash he had, and you had to bite back a smile at the sight of his crooked front tooth peeking out through his swollen plump lips.

“Mm.” He groans, and forces himself to crack an eye open. 

Your eyes flutter in embarrassment at almost being caught, but he seems none the wiser. 

“(y/n).” Jimin mumbles. You find a way to wind your arm around his neck, settling a hand in his hair, rolling the ends of the damp strands between your fingers.

“Come to this party ‘m throwing.” Jimin slurs.

You finally allow yourself to smile then. “Why? I’d like to think last time was a bit of a mess.” You tease. He just grumbles. “Never feels like a mess when I’m with you.”

Your smile quickly falls.

It was crowded once again, but you felt a sort of superiority at your fucked up relationship with him.

You went searching around for him; maybe you guys could actually talk this time! Maybe share a beer and talk about your favorite music!

Your body thrummed with all the different types of things you could do when you found him, but not in the way you wanted.

He had another girl pushed up against the wall, just like he had you in the bathroom on that fateful day.

‘But he wasn’t kissing her how he had kissed you’ You tried to reason with yourself, even as tears began to form in your eyes.

This was embarrassing. So fucking embarrassing.

You were so much better than this. You were a smart girl, you had things going for you, your life shouldnt revolve around a man who could not give any less of a fuck about you.

You find yourself stumbling away - backwards might you add - and you accidentally bump into someone, their liquor spilling over and down the back of your shirt.

You yelp, and it’s loud enough to catch Jimin’s attention, but you don’t notice because of how fast you spin around to face the person. 

“Oh God, I’m so sorry!”

“Sorry, sorry!”

You and the stranger speak at the same time, and you look up to find that he was quite… handsome.

He was tall, broad shouldered and obviously thick under that sweatervest he was wearing - which fuck it was too hot for that, even for you - and dimples settled into his cheeks and glasses that were raised high on his face, perched on his nose.

“No, no!” You wave away his apology nervously. “It’s fine! It’s my fault, I didn’t see where I was looking!”

“I shouldn’t have been carrying so many open drinks at the same time when I knew how crowded this place was, so it’s okay.”

You just watch as a genuine smile seems to spread on his face.

“How about this: we're both at fault, and we're sorry. Does that sound good?”

You find yourself nodding with a small smile. “Yeah… that sounds good.”

He stares at you, and you stare back, but then your eyes fall on a dark stain on his vest. His eyes seem to follow your gaze because he tries to wave you away this time.

“Hey, listen, it’s fine, it happens all the time! I’d say you took the brunt of it. How about you come with me, and I’ll get you a new shirt?”

Going with a guy that you’ve never met before to “get a new shirt” doesn’t seem like a good idea, but the image of Jimin plastered to that girl is all but tattooed on the back of your eyelids.

“Okay, yeah.”

The man’s smile gets bigger, but then falls as his gaze flickers to something behind you. Your brows furrow in concern, but before you can turn around, an arm slides itself around your waist.

“I think I’ve got it from here. Thanks man.”

You’re surprised to see Jimin next to you all but glaring at the tall man’s face, and there’s a prickle of irritation in your gut. The weight of his arm on you feels like a hot iron with the way it burns, and you step out of his grip just slightly.

The guy seems to notice, because his gaze narrows right back at him.

“Is this guy bothering you?” He asks.

Your eyes widen at the sight of the dog fight that might happen before you, and you just sigh.

“No, it’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure…” You let your voice die out, and the guy seems to make the connection.

“Namjoon. Kim Namjoon.”

You grin slightly. “(y/n).”

“Great. Bye, Kim Namjoon. Thanks for ruining her shirt.”

Jimin tugs you along behind him, and he’s silent the whole way to his room, and you’re half tempted to snatch yourself from his grip.

“What’s your problem?” You ask once you’re finally safe behind closed doors.

“What do you mean what’s my problem?” Jimin’s voice is hiding a thin layer of anger that you can hear clearly.

“You were such an asshole to him! And he didn’t “ruin” my shirt by the way. It’s just beer. It’ll get out.”

“That doesn’t matter. You were about to fuck off and go with some guy you didn’t even know!” He throws his hands up in the air like it’s obvious.

“Okay? It’s my business on who I go and “fuck off” with. The guy looked nice, so I trusted him.”

He scoffs. “Oh yeah, so you just trust any guy that asks you to leave with him? It’s so obvious he wanted to fuck you, and you were just going to do it with a smile on your face.”

You stare at him in disbelief. “You can’t be serious right now.” You breathe.

“Very.” He says flatly.

You encroach in his space, getting in his face and settling him with a glare.

“I came to look for you at a fucking party you invited me to, and then I find you with your tongue down some random girl’s throat.” You sneer. “So forgive me if I’m a little peeved that you’re bothered by who I might go fuck.”

Jimin doesn’t know why he’s so bothered. ‘Doesn’t know why seeing you laughing and smiling with that guy makes something in his gut twist in disgust.

“I don’t like him.”

You lean your face away from his.

“That’s what you’ve taken away from this.” You let out an incredulous laugh, and the amusement behind your eyes is fake.

“I…” You shake your head. “I can’t believe this.”

“You are not who I thought you were.” Something in you wilts. “You are a grade A asshole, Park Jimin.” You spit his name like it’s a slur, and something inside him dies.

“What?” It’s his turn to scoff. “Don’t tell me you like me or something?” He knows he’s being mean, but he’s hurt, and he feels as though he has nothing else left.

“Excuse me?” You look like a kid who got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Guilty.

There’s a sickening pleasure that takes root in his heart knowing that you want him like that.

“You’re doing this whole weird, possessive girlfriend thing.” It’s his turn to step in your space. 

“Well, sorry to say, but were just fuck buddies. I don’t want to be with you. All I want you for is a booty call, nothing more, nothing less.”

His words are like a knife to your heart and you deflate.

The tears burning behind your eyes finally fall, and your hand twitches at your side.

“I fucking hate you.” Is all you can say.

You push him out your way and he lets you, watches as you leave.

‘Good’ He thinks.

He tries to convince himself that the quicker he cuts this thing off, the easier things will get, because he doesn’t like you like that.

Right?

Right.

Your head was pounding by the time you had found your way back to your dorm, your shaking hands made it near impossible to get the key in the lock, but you managed it.

You hadn’t expected Sana to be there, bed engulfed by books and different studying utensils.

“Hey.” She greets mindlessly, flicking through papers in a certain folder before huffing and closing it when she clearly doesn’t find what she needs.

Your grip on your keys grows weak and they clatter to the floor, and she looks up in alarm, just as you take in a loud, pitiful sniffle.

“Oh, (y/n).” 

She scrambles to get up and you fall forward, trusting her to catch you, and she does, even if she’s extremely confused.

You’re sobbing into her shirt, and your chest twists and everything just hurts.

Jimin’s words feel like a slap in your face, and your heart burns like you had actually been slapped. You would have preferred that if you were going to be honest.

“(y/n), please. You have to tell me what’s wrong.”

“I liked him.” You sob. “I liked him so much, and, and, and –” You’re close to hyperventilating at this point, and Sana just seems to grow more anxious, because she pulls away from you and cups your cheeks.

“You need to breathe for me.” She says with a nervous albeit reassuring smile. 

You attempt to take a deep breath. 

“Good, that’s good, just keep trying.”  

Eventually, your breathing evens out, and she leads you over to your twin bed, seeing as hers is a bit of an organized mess right now.

“Now, can you finally explain to me what happened?”

Your hands shake as you make to pick at your cuticles, but she catches the habit before you can get to it, encasing your hands in hers.

“There’s a lot of things that you don’t know.”

“Okay…”

“But you know I like Jimin, right?”

“Mhm, like… big time.”

“Well, do you remember that party that you and your friend forced me to?” 

“Mhm.”

“Well… while I was waiting for you guys to be ready to go, Jimin approached me.”

“Oh my god?” She says excitedly, but you give her a sad smile.

“Don’t get excited just yet.”

“Anyways,” You continue. “He talked to me, then invited me to… you know, sleep with him.” Your cheeks burn as Sana stares at you dumbfounded, but you keep going. “The sex was great, don’t get me wrong, but he was so distant after everything was done.”

“He gave me his number and asked me to call him if I ever wanted to hook up with him again.”

“Douche.”

“Sana.”

“Sorry not sorry.”

You laugh a bit and she grins, relieved.

“Well, I did.”

“(y/n).” She sighs, releasing one of her hands to rub at her forehead.

“I know, I know! I also know I’m gonna sound really stupid when I say that I thought he actually liked me, but he… but he said some things to me tonight that really broke my heart.”

“Before we get to that, what made you think he likes you back?” She wasn’t trying to be mean by asking the question, you knew better. 

“Because there’ll be moments after we are done hooking up where he’d be super sweet. Like, sometimes he would cuddle me, or ask me to watch a movie, just things outside of the common hookup aftercare.”

“But then tonight,” You sighed. “I went to the party he invited me to, and caught him making out with some other girl, and so I went to leave but then I bumped into this guy.” You smile a bit at the memory.

“His name is Kim Namjoon, and he was super sweet – spilled a fuckton of beer on my shirt though.”

“So that’s why you smell like that.” 

“Yep.” You laugh. “And then Jimin came up and acted all… jealous and possessive and shit. Took me up to his room, we argued, he accused me of liking him and laughed in my face and called me just his fuck buddy after I didn’t deny that I did.”

You look up to find Sana seething.

“I’m going to call Taehyung.”

Taehyung was one of Jimin’s best friends, and he was currently groveling at Sana’s feet trying to be with her. Though she likes him, she wants to make him work for it just to see if he’ll lose interest, even though you know it’d kill her if he actually did.

“Why?”

“To break it off with him in solidarity.”

“What?!” You asked incredulously. “No, absolutely not. Taehyung is a good guy. You don’t need to do that for me.”

She regards you with a raised brow.

“Are you sure?”

You find yourself nodding. “Kinda need some roomie time right now.” Your eyes fall to her studying materials. “But if you’re too busy, I –”

“Nope. Let’s go.”

You laugh joyously as she begins to put her things away, and you make for the small fridge in your room where your sweet treats are held. 

Maybe things are going to be okay.

The next week is like a living hell.

You’ve basically made it your life’s mission to avoid Jimin as much as possible. You had already blocked him after a few encouraging words from Sana.

She still ended up calling Taehyung in the end, putting him in the dog house until his friend got his shit together. You could almost hear his pout as he begged her not to. She hung up on him.

The weather was nice, with early spring wandering around, you could finally start to wear flowier clothing, as well as study outside again.

Your head is so immersed in your book that you don’t see someone approach your table until a finger gently breaches your line of vision and taps the page.

You startle a bit and look up, and you're greeted by Namjoon’s sheepish face.

“Sorry, I didn’t know another way to get your attention, you looked really focused.”

“That’s sweet, but it’s okay. You could’ve interrupted me.” He gestures to the seat across from yours. “Can I sit?”

“Yeah, yeah! Go ahead!” You begin clearing things out of his way, and he smiles gratefully.

“I didn’t see you again after you left.” With that guy, is what’s unspoken, but you caught it anyways. “Yeah… uh – something came up, so I had to leave early.

His mouth forms an ‘o’ shape and he nods. “I see.”

“Yeah.” You grimace.

“Well I –” Namjoon swallows nervously. “I wasn’t able to tell you, but I think you’re beautiful.”

Your eyes widen. “Oh.” You breathe in surprise, and the man visibly deflates. “Unless that guy was your boyfriend, then I’m sorry! Oh, God, I should have asked first.”

“No, no! He’s not my boyfriend.” You reassure him. “‘M surprised, is all; and very, very flattered.”

You know you should reject his advances, but you’re hurt, and he’s just… so sweet. A complete contrast to Jimin, and you think he’s the change of pace that you needed.

“I think you’re handsome if that makes you feel any better.” The words feel wrong coming out of your mouth, but you grin nonetheless when his cheeks warm an admirable red.

“I…” You meet each other's eyes, and look down at the same time, laughing shyly.

Maybe Namjoon could be good for you.

“You look pathetic, man.” Taehyung speaks through a mouthful of instant ramen disgustingly.

Jimin hits him upside the back of his head, and the poor boy winces.

“Ow!”

“Don’t forget you’re in the dog house too, idiot.” Jungkook mumbles from his side of the table.

“So what you’re telling me is that you want me to beat your ass?”

“I’m just saying.” He shrugs. “Hyung fucked up, and now you’re being punished by association. No (y/n) means no Sana.” 

Jungkook’s right.

Ever since that night, Jimin’s desperately been trying to forget about you, about how hurt you looked. He almost feels sick thinking about it.

He admits that he could have handled that situation a lot better, but it was like something had taken over him. As soon as he’d seen you with Namjoon, and how willing you looked, something inside him just… snapped.

“I’m just waiting for hyung to admit that he was jealous and go and fix it.” Taehyung says simply. “It’s obvious that he’s in love with her, and I have no idea why he won’t just go and tell her.”

“I’m not -” Jimin hissed, “In love with her.”

“Yeah man, you are.”

Jimin’s eyes narrowed, but his attention was stolen by your laugh.

You were laughing because of him.

You looked so sickeningly demure talking to him, wringing your fingers together and kicking out your legs as a nervous tick. You usually only ever did that when you were with him.

Jimin liked the effect that he had on you.

He liked how your eyelashes fluttered when he complimented you, how you held on to him when he fucked you, how you kissed him back like you meant it. Sure, your body was nice, but so was your personality.

You were kind, studious, selfless, and he wasn’t sure what drew you to him the first night he had met you.

He thought that your hidden affections were all for him, but it proves that he was mistaken. That’s fine. You could be with anybody that you wanted to.

‘Just not him’ Is supplied unhelpfully.

The thought shouldn’t bother him as much as it does.

It’s just… Jimin doesn’t do the whole commitment thing. The last time he had a partner, it blew up in his face, so he just finds that casual one night stands was just the easier way to go.

But things between you and him were never casual to begin with, huh?

“Listen,” Taehyung starts once more, and points his chopsticks at Jungkook. “Jimin-hyung, he'll realize what he wants when it’s too late. Girls like (y/n) don’t come around as often as they should.” Then, he dives back into his noodles.

Jimin’s eyebrows furrowed. Were they right?

He turns his head to look at them. “Was it ever casual between me and her?” He can’t help but ask.

“No.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Wow, okay.”

“I mean, you let her sleep in your bed, hyung.” Jungkook basically scoffs. “You’ve never let any of your hookups stay the night, or cuddle with you; yet somehow she’s different.”

Different.

That was the key word here.

You were different.

The last few weeks with Namjoon have been nice.

The man was smart, and kind, and overall just a sweet, gentle giant that deserved everything in the world; but you knew deep down in your heart that you couldn’t be the one to give him that.

You saw it in the way that he looked at you, starry-eyed on his worst day, and heart-eyed the best. You can’t find it within yourself to feel flattered by it anymore, because you know that you don’t deserve it.

You don’t deserve his chivalry, his affection, and maybe - hopefully not - his love.

You’re ashamed to say that this whole rebound business blew up in your face like you went ahead and personally strapped the bomb to yourself.

You didn’t know how to tell him you didn’t like him like that, just how you had no idea how to tell Jimin you loved him after months of sleeping with him; exactly how that fateful night you said yes instead of no.

The words on the pages in front of you bled together like a big blob of ink, and Namjoon’s large foot snuck over to yours under the table and trapped it playfully.

You tried not to allow the grin you gave him to look like a grimace, even as he acted like he was reading as well. You were sure both of your reasons were entirely different.

You needed to put a stop to this, you needed to tell him you didn’t see him that way and you just wanted to be friends.

“Hey, Namjoon –”

“Do you want to go on a date with me?”

“Of course.”

Fuck. 

The look that Namjoon gave you was beaming, and you felt tears sting at the back of your eyelids.

You said yes to a date like the stupid, idiotic, selfish, terrible person you are. 

Namjoon had offered to walk you back to your dorm after your study session was over, but you couldn’t look at him anymore, the guilt crawling around in your stomach becoming something almost too much to handle.

“No thanks, Nammy.”

“Okay.” He pouts a bit. “But you be safe, alright?”

For the first time today, you gave him a true smile. “I will!”

The walk back to your dorm was slow, and heavy hearted, and you were so lost in your head, you couldn’t see that you were about to walk into someone until their hand shot out and caught you.

“Oh!” You squeaked, your head shooting up.

Your eyes widened at a very disgruntled looking Jimin.

He didn’t look as put together as he used to; his black mullet ruffled out of place and his black leather jacket rather wrinkly. 

“(y/n).” He spoke.

It had felt like forever since you heard his voice, and it took you everything in your power to not shut your eyes and bask in it.

You swallowed heavily. “I have nothing to say to you.”

“But I do.”

“That’s not how this works.”

“(y/n) please.”

You stare at him before huffing and crossing your arms. “Fine.”

“Thank you.” He breathes, and you finally notice how close you are, because you stumble back to finally put some space in between the two of you. If Jimin’s hurt by the action, he doesn’t show it.

You hate how much that bothers you.

“I fucked up.”

“No.” You instantly put a hand out to stop him. “You don’t get to say that to me.”

“What?”

“You started this whole thing, Jimin! I… I admit that I do like you, and I’ve liked you for a long time, but you don’t get to be the one to say you “fucked up” and regret everything you did.”

“Why not?” He asks, almost offended.

“Because you’ll never change!”

Jimin looks taken aback by your outburst. 

“You’ll tell me you’re sorry, we’ll fuck, and then it’ll be this process all over again. You don’t get to just do that! I need full commitment, and that’s not something you’re able to give me.”

“Plus,” You continue, taking in a deep breath. “I’m seeing someone right now.”

Jimin fucking snorts.

“Don’t tell me you have a date with the Namkim guy.”

“It’s Namjoon, and yes, I am. He’s nice.”

“Oh, is that it? He’s just nice?”

“And… and he’s smart too!” You exclaim almost petulantly. “He gives me flowers and tells me how much he likes me all the time, unlike you, who’s so emotionally constipated that not even laxatives would be able to help you!”

“Wha –” Jimin laughs in disbelief. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me! I’m gonna go on a date with a guy who actually likes me!”

You straighten your tote bag on your shoulder and brace yourself, straightening your posture.

“Now if you excuse me, I have a date to plan for, and homework to do.”

“What? (y/n)! Come back, I’m sorry!”

“No!”

You’re not going to lie and say you didn’t replay your entire interaction with Jimin for the rest of the week.

There was something about talking to him that gave you the energy to get through class, the haunting realization that maybe he was worth a damn. 

Wondering what would have happened if you had allowed him to apologize instead of cutting him off, of accepting his apology and allowing yourself to be with him in that way.

But you know, you know that if you were to go back to your old routine with him, it’d kill you. It’d kill you to watch him flirt with other people, or watch him take them home.

You fiddled with the strap of your dress, staring at yourself in the mirror and feeling awkward at the fact that the material only looked good if you didn’t wear a bra.

You were going to a restaurant with Namjoon; it was a nice, original first date idea. You’d talk over food, and get along just fine!

Namjoon was a nice guy. He was sweet, and he wouldn’t try to fuck you on the first date.

Oh, God, would he?

You really hope not.

“Damn girl.” Sana whistles from her spot on her bed. “You look sexy! You’re gonna blow that nerd’s socks off!”

“Sana.” You warned. “Be nice! He’s not a nerd. He’s just studious.”

“Sure. Every Philosophy major is studious.” She giggles to herself.

“Oh! Do you think he’s a virgin?!”

“Sana!” This time it’s a whine, but your arguing is interrupted by a couple knocks on the door.

“Oh, God, it’s him!” You whisper in a panic. 

You continue to mess with the front of your dress, pulling the hem up at the top to try and hide as much boobage as possible.

“Stop!” Your roommate hisses. “You look great!”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah! Now go!”

You waddle over to the door and pull it open, your heart melting at the sight of a good looking Namjoon in front of you.

His hair was tastefully rumpled, a button up shirt tucked into a pair of slacks that hugged his thighs deliciously.

Wow, you were really hogging this man for yourself.

There was another stab of guilt when his eyes fell on your figure and he swallowed, his cheeks painting themselves an adorable pink. 

“W – wow, (y/n). You look amazing.”

“Thanks.” You say shyly. “Should we go?”

“Oh! Of course, of course!” 

He offers you his arm and you take it.

The conversation between the two of you was kept light, even as you got into the Uber that he had paid for.

“I uh – I don’t have my license.” Namjoon had sheepishly admitted to you one day.

He usually rode his bike to places, so you were surprised to see that he had splurged for today.

Shame burns in your gut once again.

(y/n): 0, Guilt and shame: the winner.

The restaurant was nice as you were led to your table, and very quiet.

You shuffled around in your seat, sheepishly ordering water as Namjoon looked over the menu.

“I’m so happy we're doing this.” Namjoon says after you get your drinks, and you sip on the freezing tap water.

“Yeah…” You speak after a few hefty gulps of your drink.

“I meant it when I said you looked gorgeous tonight.”

“Ah…” You fluster. “Where did all this confidence come from?”

“It comes from me wanting to ask you a question that you’ll answer truthfully.”

Instantly your heart falls into your ass, because you know exactly what’s coming.

“I might be a bit of a stick in the mud, but that doesn’t mean I’m blind, (y/n).”

“I can see that you haven’t really been in any of… whatever we have going on. And I’m not even going to lie, I don’t even think we’ve had anything to begin with.”

“What gave it away?” You ask with a grimace. “That.”

“That?”

“That thing you do with your face when you lie.”

You blink at him in surprise.

“Oh.”

“And you’ve done it every single time I’ve tried to flirt or compliment you. I’m surprised you even agreed to go out with me.”

“I…” You feel like you’re going to throw up. “I swear I didn’t mean to lead you on! There’s just been this thing, and I can’t tell you what it is –”

“Yes you can.”

“Pardon?” You ask in surprise.

“You know exactly why you can’t commit fully to this.”

“I…” You deflate in your seat, fiddling with the napkin. “You’re right.”

“It’s that guy, right? The one from the party?” 

Namjoon’s words aren’t hurt, judgemental, or angry, they’re just factual. Like how he gets when he breaks down a piece of difficult text in one of his ancient little books he likes to read.

“I should start from the beginning shouldn’t I?”

“We’ve got all night.”

So you do. You start from that night at the party, over how you’ve felt these last few weeks, even as the food had come and gone, you two hadn’t stopped talking.

You had refused to let him pay at the end of the night, and you literally almost had to fight him over splitting the bill.

“This was supposed to be a date.” He speaks with a pout, and you just laugh. 

You two worked well as friends, because you nudged his foot. “Yah! We can go on another date soon, okay?”

He just laughs with a shake of his head.

When you guys leave, you offer to pay for your shared Uber when you spot someone you weren’t expecting.

Jimin’s in the parking lot, leaning against his car and looking around. When his gaze lands on you, his slouched position straightens, and your heart stutters in your chest.

“This guy is like the fucking boogeyman.” You murmur, and Namjoon laughs once more.

“I uh… may have sort of called him here.”

Your head whips around and you stare at him in betrayal. “What?!”

“Listen. You and him have some shit to work out, and - bless your heart - we both know you don’t have a backbone, so I think it would be better if you both fixed this, or ended it for good.”

You can’t help but just stare at him. “Where did you even get his number?”

“Taehyung. The poor man’s been practically begging me to leave you alone and let Jimin fix this because he’s been sexiled.”

You sigh, glancing over at a waiting Jimin who’s watching you hopefully.

“You won’t be here for solidarity, will you?”

“For both our sakes, I think you know the answer to that.”

You swallow, turning your attention back to him. “I really am sorry about how everything went down between us. You’re a great guy, and I’m sure one day another person will be able to see that. I’m sorry it’s not me.”

He shrugs his shoulders. “It’s alright, I need to worry about my studies anyways.”

You smile sadly at him, and he just chuckles and shakes his head, pulling you into his warm embrace.

“I mean it (y/n),” He starts when you separate, “It’s okay, but you need to go, because Jimin looks like he’s about to throttle me, and I’m not really interested in fighting someone tonight. I have a test in the morning.”

Your smile is a little less sad this time, and he waves you off.

The walk to Jimin feels like a walk to doom; it’s silent, tense, and you’re unsure about where you’ll end up at the end of the night.

“Hi.” You breathe awkwardly. You grasp onto your clutch purse like a lifeline.

“Hey.”

“Uh…” You begin, but Jimin just sighs, opening the passenger door, and gesturing for you to get in. “We need to talk.”

Your shoulders deflate. “Alright.”

Even though he said you needed to talk, the car ride is silent, even as you watch yourself being pulled into a parking lot, the man stopping and turning his car off.

“So, are you going to let me speak this time, or are you just going to cut me off again?”

You scowl. “Is that really how you want to start this conversation?”

“No, no, fuck I’m sorry. I’m already fucking it up.” His hands grip the steering wheel, twisting them around nervously.

“I’m not used to this.”

“Used to what?”

“Dating, feelings, that kind of thing. And I thought that if I hurt you, and never had to see you again, that those things would just go away, but they didn’t.”

He slumps back in his seat, casting his gaze out the window before turning his attention towards you.

“When I saw you with him –”

“Namjoon.”

“Yes,” He all but hisses, “With Namjoon, I felt sick to my stomach. Like something was wrong, like he was taking something from me.”

“But I was never yours to begin with.”

“Yeah,” He sighs. “I know, and that’s the issue.”

“You were right about me being an asshole, because I was. I projected all of my weird, little possessive feelings onto you and totally flipped out when I should have just talked to you.”

“But instead I pushed you away, said things I didn’t mean, and you still went with that guy, and I felt horrible.” Jimin hesitantly reaches out a hand – an olive branch of sorts – and waits for you to take it.

He hopes you take it.

You look at him and back down to his hand, before lifting yours and intertwining your fingers.

“What are you trying to tell me, Jimin? Because… because if we do this friends-with-benefits bullshit again, I think it’ll actually kill me.”

“I don’t think I could handle that even if I tried.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that seeing you with the other people that aren't me makes me feel sick to my stomach, and I’d rather have you all to myself like the nasty, greedy bastard I am.”

“Like a boyfriend.”

Jimin finally smiles.

That beautiful, eye closing smile that makes your heart skip a beat too many.

“Yeah, (y/n), like a boyfriend.”

“Does that make me your girlfriend?”

“I would sure hope so.”

You grin as well, happiness painting over your features as you watch him.

“What does this mean for us now?” He leans forward into your space, and this time you don’t move back, just gazing up at him with wide, curious eyes. “This means that you’ll hopefully let me kiss you.”

“Well lucky for you, I’m feeling nice tonight.”

He snorts and rolls his eyes, yet connects your lips together. Your eyelids flutter shut.

Euphoria. That’s the only feeling you could describe after feeling the plushness of his mouth after so long. It’s felt like centuries since you’ve touched him, and every nerve in your body lights aflame.

You tangle your fingers in his hair, and his hands cup your jaw, tugging you to him over the center console.

“I can’t go that far.” You pant with a chuckle, and he huffs a small smile.

“Backseat?”

“Please don’t tell me you want to have makeup sex in the backseat of your car in the middle of the park.”

“You want to have makeup sex?” His eyes glimmer. It’s your turn to snort. “I thought that was obvious.”

“Then no, we're absolutely not doing that here.”

“Then let’s get out of here.”

“Yes ma’am.”

© yoongsriverandme 2025-26

[loveridden1999]

hey babe okay so I saw the first episode and let me tell u u thirsting about helly r (or helen? im guessing that's her outside name) is soo valid and justified she's very pretty and she's banging on doors screaming to get out and throwing things so I obviously admire her lol also this scout guy omg I cannot take him seriously he was a joke character in the good place it was so funny I keep thinking of him but except for that hmmm it's kinda interesting but I fell asleep like 5 times😭 why is it so slow vio why do they show stupid things like him walking through a white hallway and tying his shoelaces i guess am just used to sitcoms i cannot watch these slowpokes I hope i didn't miss anything important my favourite scene yet from just ep1 was scout sobbing in his car before going to work (haha been there done that) and also helly's video she's so animated corporates will truly kill us all this concept is wild tho but like. it's. i thought that wow i can't keep you're giving away one third of your life to a corporation and you're not even going to remember it like how can you waste it lifeis sooo precious. but then I think about all the precious hours i spent in my office formatting idiotic word documents because my seniors said the font looks bad the spacing is incorrect and how tired I was that I just came home and fell asleep and I'm like oh. i loved that line the boss lady said that humans imagined hell but it doesn't exist but the scary part is that what humans can imagine, they can create. so we all gonna die. but anyway yes that's my review of the first episode.i think i definitely missed some important things like i remember seeing some very old guy talking and suddenly he's like I'm petey and I'm like wait YOU'RE petey? where did u come from? but I'll figure it out lol maybe I didn't sleep enough last night

you'll only fall more and more in love with helly lol (also try not to get spoiled by my posts here because i need to see you react to everything a hundred percent authentic). okay in show's defence it's trying to show and not tell, that's why the first episode might seem a bit boring and slow but trust me it'll speed up by end of 2nd episode. the walking thing is show you the shift in his mannersims how outside he seemed depressed and crying while when his innie (aka the severed self) had absolutely no idea at all (the puzzled look at the wet tissue paper and throwing it) the changing of shoes because he isn't allowed to wear outside ones inside it'd have probably make his innie wonder why they're wet (i am realising this as we speak tbh, because his innie has no idea about sky sun snow weather etc) and give him a chance okay forget his previous characters RIGHTTTT it seems like a fucked up concept but if it was possible i am sure soo many companies would take advantage of it to prey on depressed/naive people. like it sounds nice as a concept but (you'll realise this as you watch) in fact is inhuman to that the other part of yourself that is consistently working. lmao that's miss cobel for you, tell me more about how you feel about her as you go on. also get some sleep and try not to be too worried about catching all the symbolism you'll get them as you go plus we have tumblr to discuss anyways mwah

[poppadom0912]

Hi! You have so many good Chicago stories! I had an idea for a Will Halstead fic, if you'd be interested... OC/Reader is a nurse at Med, she and Will are a (newish?) couple. She has been sick or hurt, but isn't telling Will, to avoid worrying him - Sharon (or someone) has been on his ass, for something he didn't do of course, but he's been under a microscope, so she doesn't want to bother or distract him - until she passes out or ends up in an OR (depending on the illness/injury) and he finds out after the fact... Heavy on the angst is always good ;)

A/N: I'm a sucker for angst. Hope this is good enough. I tried researching as accurately as possible but there might be inaccuracies.

I'm posting this is celebration of not failing my exams which means no resitting! I didn't get the high grades I wanted but we move on. Enjoy!! Hope this is good enough.

Warnings: Canon-typical injuries, blood, angst w a happy ending, surgery

*****

Becoming a nurse was inevitable for you because it was the next best thing after a doctor and you didn't want to go through all those extra years of learning and debt.

You were born with a congenital heart defect as a result of your mother poorly caring for her diabetes during pregnancy. All your life, your parents had been on top of your health, always dragging you to specialists and making sure you were still taking your meds.

You moved states several years ago and now you weren't constantly reminded of the defect you were born with.

There were times though when you did get forgetful and Will never complained about your bad trait that you couldn't handle, he shrugged it off and made sure your health was one hundred percent.

Your relationship was in the honeymoon phase, six months in you were both decently comfortable. Everyone was aware of your relationship but you both agreed to keep work at work and home at home.

Recently, Will was under extra scrutiny from Sharon because of a small incident that happened in the ED when his brother rolled up bleeding from his shoulder. No one could blame him for his reaction, it was completely justified but that hospital were being asses and wouldn't let go.

Following this, your interactions at work decreased at your suggestion to make things a little easier for him. And at first, it was working but then it just got straight up frustrating.

All of a sudden, following the intense summer heatwave, everyone's workload doubled and your hours never lined up. You'd be leaving and he'd be preparing for his second double shift of the week.

And things only got worse from there. You were so busy because of the nurse shortages that your priorities began shifting, your health dwindling down the list.

But no one needed to know that.

*****

Week One

"And that's me done, you ready to break?" Will asked, setting aside the tablet on the desk. You both took your breaks together as much as you could, any time you could get together you would take.

"Yes I am." You nodded, slipping your hand into his as you began walking out of the ED. "I remember someone promising coffee from the cart outside."

Will chuckled, rolling his eyes at the reminder of the expensive coffee sitting outside that you loved. Just as he was going to reply, Maggie shouting your name stopped him.

Sighing, your heart felt heavy both figuratively and literally. With a sheepish smile, you pecked him on the cheek with a promise to catch him later on during shift.

Not being able to get a word in, Will simply watched you scurry off to help the next incoming patient, leaving him to change directions towards the cafeteria.

*****

Week two

You should've been more attentive but being short of breath after a run wasn't uncommon. It was early morning and Will's side of the bed was empty so you took what used to be a daily run alone.

As the day progressed, you started feeling tired and your fatigue progressed. It should've been the first sign to you that you needed to slow down and take care of yourself but the next shooting in Chicago just couldn't wait.

"Y/N, are you okay?" April asked, standing besides you with a new file in hand. "You look pale."

"I'm fine." You assured her, nodding as you licked your drying lips. "And before you ask, Will doesn't know and doesn't need to be interrupted, he has a patient in the ICU."

April backed away apprehensively, always trying to check up with you whenever time permitted. Maybe she was also to blame for not being more forceful with her concerns.

It wasn't her fault that she forgot you had a heart disease.

*****

Week three

"I love you so much." You muttered against his forehead before stepping away to leave the dark bedroom.

Will stirred slightly at the contact, shifting under the covers and further messing up his curls you so badly wanted to delve your fingers into but you were on a time crunch.

Just as you were leaving the room, your chest clenched, pain suddenly overtaking you. Clutching onto the door frame, your grip slacked and your bag dropped causing Will to wake up.

"What's wrong?" Will asked in his half awake state, completely disheveled. He was blinking the sleep away while he turned to you and tried to see what was wrong but failed due to severe sleep deprivation.

"Are you okay? What happened?" He continued, voice hoarse like it usually was after a deep sleep

For some reason, you struggled to form words, your chest feeling as though it was being stabbed repeatedly.

And for some reason, you couldn't come up with a logical excuse and you stupidly left without a word to your lover.

*****

Week four

You couldn't ignore it anymore.

It felt like your body was starting to give up on you. You were constantly tired and out of breath and the chest pains never let up, at times, they even doubled and felt worse than the worst of your period cramps.

The biggest flashing red warning sign should've been when you fainted in the bathroom after your shower.

You came home shattered from your 24 hour shift. Just as you walked in the door, Will was leaving for his 48 hour shift. At this point, you really felt like the world was against you.

You were kinda like roommates more than romantic partners. You were barely at home together and at work, you tried to keep interactions to a minimum after the small incident that the board was elevating ridiculously.

Waking up on the bathroom rug, your body felt numb almost paralysed. It was like what movies described comas to be but your chest was still pulsating in pain.

You weren't being a really good nurse because you simply got up, drank some water and ate some food before sleeping it off.

*****

Week five

The silence was suffocating.

The two of you finally got more than two minutes together but words somehow failed you.

With droopy eyes and furrowed brows, your hands itched to grab the blue scrubs covering your chest. If it wasn't for your boyfriend sitting opposite you, you would've been hunched over the sinks in the women's room.

"What's wrong?" It was a question but with that tone, it felt more like a demand. His two words hit you hard, your eyes dragging from the table up to his big brown eyes filled with nothing but eternal love and concern. "And don't say nothing cause that's clearly bullshit."

And for some reason, you flinched.

Licking your chapped lips, you scrunched your eyes closed at the pain encasing your heart. Despite being back on your medication, the pain didn't cease.

"Y/N? Baby-"

"CODE SILVER. CODE SILVER IN THE ED."

*****

Today

For the past week, Will was hypervigilant about his work. Peter kalmik was never his biggest fan so it didn't help he was constantly making his presence known along with the more power holding board members.

You hated how he no longer fought his case and he just conformed, keeping his head buried in the sand and distanced himself from those he cared about.

It got to such a point that when Jay came in with only work intentions, Will physically forced himself to stay well away.

You were so caught up in your concern for him that you neglected your medication on the kitchen counter.

The pain today all of a sudden increased tenfold in the middle of shift. You were helping Doris turn over a treatment room, listening as she talked about her family drama that you loved to hear about when you felt the world come to an abrupt stop.

Before you knew it, breath escaped you and darkness enveloped you.

“Y/N?!” Doris shouted, going around the bed and crouching down besides your unconscious body.

As she started checking your pulse and your breathing, Connor ran in with Maggie in tow having witnessed you fall from the nurses desk.

In a flurry of rushed movements, you were placed on a bed as your friends searched for the cause of your unconscious state. Out of the blue, Maggie spoke up, reminding everyone of your heart condition.

Equipped with the new but old information, the cardiothoracic surgeon was now more than confident he was able to help you.

"Whose her emergency contact? Is it still her parents or has it been changed to Will?" Connor asked the charge nurse as they started wheeling the gurney towards the elevators. They needed to get you into surgery as soon as possible before you deteriorated.

"Good question."

"Page him anyways."

"Already on it."

*****

"I'm a horrible boyfriend."

"No you're not."

"All the signs were there and I missed them."

"We did too."

"I know Connor is one of the best but what if-"

"I'm going to stop you right there." Maggie cut him off, looking at him sternly, eerily resembling the face of a mother telling off her child. "This is no ones fault and you know that, stop punishing yourself for something no one could control."

Will opened his mouth to interject but stopped himself when Maggie held her hand up. "Yes, maybe Y/N should've taken better care of herself but as a doctor, you know that this surgery was inevitable anyways."

"It's better that she was already in the hospital and not home alone where no one would've noticed till you finished in another eight hours." Maggie continued, being more gentle as she got her point across. She was just as concerned but for everyone else's sake, she could be their pillar.

"Look at her Will." Maggie said, gently rubbing him on the back, hopefully bringing him some comfort. "She's in the best hands."

And of course Will knew that, he wouldn't say it to Connor's face but the man was a heck of a surgeon. There was no one else he would want operating on you but he was simply unnerved to no end.

He couldn't wipe off this icky feeling he had. It lurked around him like a shadow and stuck to him like a stain. He felt like a failure - he was unable to help you as both a doctor and a boyfriend - what good was he?

News spread of your collapse around the hospital and as an automatic response, the hospital board stepped metres away from Will, almost like he was sick with a deathly contagious disease.

It was so stupid that it was funny.

Will wanted to rip his hair out. How he was even standing watching your surgery was beyond him right now. He felt sick to his stomach at the sight of your chest cracked open, your heart just there for the world to see.

He never felt so useless before.

*****

Waking up was one of the most confusing scenarios you've ever been in. The last thing you remembered was being in the ED with Doris before blinking and the next thing you knew, you were waking up in recovery.

Your body felt like the heaviest gym weights were sat on you. Your mouth unbelievably dry as your eyes squinted in the dim lighting, trying to look around the room for any sign of life.

And right by your bedside, sleeping in a very awkward position was the man you considered the love of your life.

It must've been the movement of your head, you literally turning your head less than 90 degrees that woke him up because without any further prompting, Will was no longer dead to the world.

Instantly, he was alive and alert, no trace of sleep anywhere on his face as he made eye contact with you.

He felt as light as a feather to see you awake, the biggest weight being lifted off his chest from the relief that nothing went wrong despite knowing Connor made no mistake at all.

"Pulmonary valve stenosis." Was the first thing Will said, easily recognising the confusion painting your face. "Connor put in a balloon. They'll keep you for probably a week to monitor you to see if you need a valvotomy."

You hummed, letting him know that you understood everything he told you without talking. Somehow, without even looking at him, he knew and brought forth a cup with a straw in, holding it to your mouth allowing you to sip easily.

"I'm so sorry Y/N." Will said earnestly, his eyes shimmering as he intertwined your fingers with his. "I wasn't paying enough attention to you otherwise-"

"Stop." You interrupted him, voice still slightly hoarse from not using it. "Blaming yourself helps no one."

"What's done is done." You continued, squeezing his hands when he squeezed yours first. "I'm really the one to blame. If I took care of myself and did something when I first was having problems then we wouldn't be here."

Silence followed, the only sound being the constant beeping from all the machines attached to you.

"Never faint on me again, you hear me?"

"Can't promise you that babes."

"Yes you can."

"You're hilarious Will."

"No, I'm being serious Y/N."

"Don't make me laugh, where's Connor Rhodes, my favourite doctor?"

"Very funny, I think I'll buy April expensive cart coffee next time."

[oveliagirlhaditright]

Long overdue: my thoughts on the final book in Kendare Blake's "In Every Generation" series titled: "Against the Darkness."

Now, for some reason I think I'm going to start off with some of the things I didn't like about the book first (which is maybe a weird way to do a review--especially for a book and series I do genuinely like--but trust me when I say I did enjoy this book). We'll get to the good parts down below. But we all know finales are always hard and don't always completely stick the landing: I just expect that at this point. But even with that, I standby that this is my favorite Buffyverse continuation, yeah. I'm also really hoping Kendare Blake somehow gets contacted to help with the Buffy TV show reboot coming up, though I know it won't happen.

...

Okay, one complaint I kind of have is that I feel all of our heroes get handed the Idiot Ball at least at one point in this book--and they've gotten extremely bad at communicating with each other--but though I said that it's a complaint... I'm actually not bothered by it that much. Like our Scoobies of old, our new Scoobies are high school students, after all, so they're not always going to be making the best decisions. And there are reasons as to why some of the characters might be choosing to be keeping secrets from one another. And with the stakes higher than they ever have been before, it probably makes sense why everyone is super emotional and probably not one-hundred percent thinking clearly. That being said, it is kind of sad seeing them like this when you compare them to their past books' selves.

2. At first as I was reading the series, I was getting really excited about the idea that Willow was clearly going to go Dark again at some point... But then I read this one fanfiction criticizing Buffy season 8 having Willow go Dark again in that world's future, since season 7's ending seemed to indicate that Willow found a perfect balance with her magic and surely never would again: maybe was even incapable of it? And while I think why Willow in the Dark Horse comics going Dark is justified (though this fic author didn't know that at the time, because this fanfiction was written just when season 8 had come out, and the reason as to why Willow went Dark isn't revealed until season 12), I do largely agree with them. So then a part of me found myself wishing that maybe there wasn't going to be a plot about Willow going Dark in this book series, and that maybe it did break canon some... But that being said, I did definitely enjoy it when it did happen. And the build-up to it was expertly done throughout these novels. And no matter what, it's always fun to see Dark Willow again.

3. One thing I liked that Kendare Blake had done in one of the previous books, was having Spike mention that he and Buffy had never gotten together--or had a relationship together (I forget the exact wording)--after their previous one in season six/after he'd tried to rape her and that sort of thing. And I'll admit that I'm someone who has come to hate Spike as a character now (something I don't want to be doing, and am actively trying not to do--as I used to love his character: and he used to me my preferred person for Buffy, if you can believe it). But I admired that Kendare Blake did this because, if I'm being honest, even with Spike going to get a soul after the attempted rape to try and make things right... I now don't think there should have been any shipping of Spike and Buffy after that fact: it sends a bad message, in my mind. So, yeah: I liked that Kendare Blake had written that it seemed Spike and Buffy hadn't had any sort of (romantic and/or sexual) relationship after that.

But in this book, after Buffy is rescued, it's sort of left up to the reader if Spike and Buffy kissed or not. The new Scoobies are trying to guess if they did. And I think it's Buffy who says, "What happens between my and Spike's lips is between me and Spike alone." Also, at the end of the novel, Buffy is taking Frankie (our main character Slayer) with her for some training, and Spike (who is Frankie's Watcher) is thinking of staying behind, in believing Frankie now doesn't need him anymore. Buffy quickly corrects Spike that he's being an idiot--and that of course Frankie still needs him. She still needed her own Watcher well into her twenties, after all, and she tells him to come with them. And it's also hinted at that maybe something could happen between the two of them if he does. Or perhaps not. I'll admit that I'm not the biggest fan of us now getting this up in the air stuff with Spuffy, when I'd thought that Kendare Blake had made a poignant choice in having had nothing happen between them before. But also the fact that it's up in the air means that I can take it (since I can choose to decide nothing happens with them, if I want). I'm glad that it's nothing concrete.

4. I'd prepared myself for a long while that Angel wasn't going to appear in this series--I prepared myself for the worst, actually, after "Buffy: The Last Vampire Slayer"--and I was right that Angel is not in these novels (side note: I have the strangest feeling now that Disney owns the Buffyverse, ugh, they just... don't like Angel--for some reasons I could maybe understand. But Spike also has issues, if we're being honest, and it seems they're maybe Draco in Leather Pantsing him?--and are trying to keep him out of things, but I could be wrong), but I'm glad about the Angel references we do get throughout the series. Also that Frankie and Grim are somewhat Bangel 2.0. But no: I'm mostly glad of the Angel references we get in this book, and that while he's not here, it's not a "Buffy: The Last Vampire Slayer" situation, thank God! Buffy clearly still has feelings for Angel, too (not just Spike), and she even teases Spike when asking him to come with her at the end, that on their journey they'll "stop in L.A., because Angel's always good for some training." LOL. I'm just going to headcanon that Angel, while not joining the Scoobies in trying to save Buffy, was trying to do so by himself, like we find out Giles apparently was doing in the background of a majority of these books. Or something big was going on for him again, and he had no idea what happened to Buffy, and he's going to be miffed when he finds out and that no one told him: like something similar to when he was in Pylea during Buffy's death in season 5.

5. While I was always going to prefer for Willow to end up with Oz in this series (it somewhat hurts that we got teased with it, only for it to be taken away. But oh well. Their beautiful friendship in this still means the world to me, too), I do like Safarina DeWitt. And she and Willow are cute together... Though I do think it moved to love pretty fast (even in knowing they had a past relationship with each other). One minute it seems like Willow is falling for her again, and maybe entertaining the idea of things with Safarina once more, and then she's thinking that she wishes Buffy were there to talk to, because she thinks she might be in love with Safarina--all while Safarina isn't even there at the moment, because she's gone on a long mission with Vi. What?

6. I don't know if I'm the biggest fan of some of the stuff that happened with the Slayer power in this overall series, but it's whatever.

7. This isn't truly a complaint, just a slight disappointment (but one I can live with): I'd kind of hoped that this book would somehow reveal that Faith hadn't actually died like we'd earlier been led to believe, but no dice:( But oh well, I guess:( Buffy died a number of times. I guess it's time we finally got a story where Faith did. At least our girl went out heroically -sobs-

I think that's most of the bad that I can think of: Onto the good!

I already made a post about this, so I'm basically going to copy it here: "It's so nice it is that this is probably one of the few things that exists that treats Kennedy well (Vi actually turns evil for a bit in this series, which is surprising because I’ve never seen anyone give Vi that kind of treatment [especially over Kennedy]. But she turns it around in the end).

You’d probably say, 'Of course it has to treat Kennedy well. It’s an officially licensed thing.' But so was 'Chosen' by Kiersten White. And that book had Buffy calling Kennedy a bitch in it:(

Even though Willow and Kennedy have broken up by the time this series is taking place, Kennedy still calls Willow 'goddess.' It’s cute. And Kennedy is quite the badass."

2. Frankie is so freaking wonderful. She's the heartbeat of this series, as she should be, and I love my little Willow-Buffy-Usagi Tsukino Slayer with my whole heart (she's one of the best Slayers post-season 7 that we've ever gotten, hands-down. Maybe even the best. And I hope the new Slayer we get in the Buffy reboot series is even a fraction like her). But one thing I loved about Frankie in this book, was that we really see her Slayer intuition shining through when it comes to the villain, Aspen. Aspen really starts wrapping everyone around her little finger (and she even had me fooled some, which is a testament to Blake's writing. And the fact that Aspen is a good villain who isn't one-dimensional. As some of that stuff with her, like her friendship with Hailey, was real). But Frankie saw right through her, ala how Buffy would have, and I was proud of her for it. Though the tension that Frankie's hatred for Aspen created between her and Hailey was hella interesting!

3. Speaking of Hailey, I love my badass Potential Slayer SO much (and I missed her when she couldn't be with her Scoobies--though her scenes with Aspen when she was being a double-agent were intriguing). And the fact that she's actually more talented than Frankie is is interesting. Her whole story in this book is interesting. I was always big on Hailey, but I don't think I took a shining to her this much until this book. Her and Vi (her older sister) get to be part of the Slayer line together! But I adored when Hailey told Vi something like, "I guess the Slayer line wanted me, too." And Vi frowned and said, "The Slayer line's greedy." Hailey reminds me a lot of Isabelle Lightwood from "The Mortal Instruments" series.

4. Truthfully, I think that this is the first time that I actually enjoyed Sigmund as a character and wanted him and Hailey together. The way he was actually such a good friend to her in this novel, when she couldn't go to the Scoobies without blowing their cover? And how he kept her secret about being a Potential for her when she didn't want anyone to know about it? -applauds- And it was clever on Blake's part that since Sigmund, who is a demon, is supposed to marry a demon (which is why he and Hailey had to break-up), she had Hailey become a Potential Slayer in this book... which is part-demon, you know;)

5. While I somewhat enjoyed our werewolf Jake as a character before, and his relationship with his uncle Oz, I don't think I fully appreciated him until this book, either (also, his boyfriend is the sweetest). He fucks up terribly (because of Jordy pretty much wanting him to, no less--he wanted him to not "completely muzzle the wolf, but rather be more wolf": paraphrasing here). But the way he recovers from that, and handles his newly made pack that he created, made me truly appreciate him.

The Scoobies all coming together to fight a super-powered Aspen (when they really had no chance), with all the Slayer strength she'd stolen, also made me care for them all the more.

6. I did like Grimloch and Frankie as a couple quite a bit. But, yeah: they did need to breakup as they did in this novel, since they were mostly lust above all else. Edit: Frankie liked Grim, but she wasn't in love with him yet. And Grim thought he shouldn't be her first love--and even Frankie had to agree--so they broke up. But I did enjoy how Frankie said something like, "You may not be my first love, but could you be my fifteenth?" And Grimloch replies, "I may be your last love." That was sweet. So there's hope for them in the future, then, and that they could perhaps even end up together someday.

7. Using Buffy's cross necklace that she got from Joyce (this idea that Joyce gave her a cross necklace is monumental and I need a fic about it, STAT!) to be the thing to bring her back was just such a great idea. And seeing her and the Slayers finally get to return and kick Aspen's ass in an epic battle, after she'd imprisoned them for so long, was everything.

8. Giles! How could I forget Giles?! I actually sort of knew beforehand what characters were going to appear in this series, because of an interview of Kendare Blake's that I watched. She, however, did not mention Giles in said interview. And it was such a pleasant surprise to have him show up right when the shit had hit the fan. And she wrote him so well. Giles and Spike's interactions, in particular, were hilarious.

9. I said above that I don't really like Spike as a character anymore. But Kendare Blake's writing is some of the exception to that rule: she reminds me of why I loved him to begin with--she writes him in-character, I believe, and so funnily. And she shows him as a true hero and father figure to Frankie, while still having flaws and being Spike (like in being a drama queen and being a bit of a child). It's a lot of fun, really.

10. I kind of mentioned this above, but Oz is everything right in this world--as he always has been--and his relationship with Willow, Jake, the other kids like Frankie, and Spike is really something to write home about.

11. Willow and Frankie's relationship mother-daughter relationship in this series is something I'll never get over from this series. It's just so beautiful.

I think that's mostly everything. I'm very glad Kendare Blake was the one who got the commission for this series, and I'll always remember it and surely return to it soon. And I very much thank her for writing it.

Shutting up now.

Edit: I forgot to mention that finally getting to see Frankie and Buffy interact at the end of this was everything.

[thencitytales]

Non-stop Teasing - CYJ

🌷Pairing: Choi Yeonjun of TXT x fem!reader (3rd person used)

🌷 kinda enemies to lovers

🌷wc: 4.1k

🌷 Fluff? sort of angsty tho

🌷 warning: drinking, cussing, frat party, Yeonjun being kind of down bad

🌷There are a few other idols mentioned, some of them in a relationship with each other, I do not think these people are together nor do I ship them, I just felt like the story could have used these dort of relationships (ChaewonxWooyoung, KarinaxJeno)

🌷 Hey!! I am back because i felt like it. This fic is a fleeting idea i had a long time ago and was finally able to finish. In the beginning it was not meant for Yeonjun but it had mostly OC'S so if you see random names I'm sorry, I have yet to proofread it. Feel free to give me notes and feedback, as I appreciate it a lot!! 'Til next time <3

(not my GIF)

Yeonjun. Stupid, fucking Yeonjun.

Idiot, average-looking yet so stupidly attractive Yeonjun.

“If you really hate him you should stop staring at him, you know?” a blonde girl talked to her best friend, who shushed her in response.

“Shut up Chaewon, I’m not staring” Y/N retorted against her best friend. 

Except she was, and she knew it.

Another person in the library was also very aware of Y/N and what she was doing, because he could feel her eyes pierce through his head. 

And he loved it.

“Ask anybody here, they’ll say you’re staring,” Chaewon said in an amused tone, making Y/N’s eye twitch in frustration.

“Well, then it’s hate-staring, glaring if you will,” Y/N looked away from the boy and glared at her best friend, turning her head ever so slowly, as to recreate the scene in a horror movie.

“Just like I’m glaring at you right now.” Chaewon let out a laugh at her friend’s antics and shrugged it off.

“Sure thing, love. Keep telling yourself that.”Chaewon said. Y/N could only scoff before going back to look at her books.

Look was indeed the best word to describe what she was doing, the words on the page being read for the tenth time in as many minutes without understanding nor absorbing any of it. Biology sucked, and so did Y/N’s brain at that moment. So much so that after a couple of seconds she got distracted again.

“What is it with the stupid beanie anyway? Like what’s the deal with that? DO YOU THINK HE HAS A BALD SPOT?” Y/N whisper-screamed, making Chaewon almost spit out the water she was trying to drink after finally reaching the end of her chapter.

Suddenly the girls heard a louder voice coming from behind them.

“It’s actually for style-related purposes, no bald spot, though if you’re still in doubt you could always ask him. Also, Y/N, you were one hundred percent staring at Yeonjun, just FYI.” Wooyoung said whilst chuckling at the little jump the girls made upon hearing him. Y/N turned around, red in the face, a mixture of embarrassment for being caught and pure wrath, caused by Wooyoung’s presence.

“How long have you been here?” She said bitterly. The boy could sense she wanted to add something, the words dying in her throat a bit too fast. He assumed a “dickhead”, or “asshole” was missing, but he let it go, not teasing her any further. 

“The whole time, love,” he said mocking what Chaewon had said to her friend just a few minutes prior. Then turned away and returned to his spot at the same table with Yeonjun, Soobin and Changbin.

Y/N looked warily at her surroundings to make sure no one else was around to eavesdrop on them.

“How in actual hell are you able to like that guy?” Her shocked expression clearly visible on her features.

Chaewon shrugged.

“He just likes to tease you, he’s actually very nice” She answered, her cheeks turning slightly pink before continuing. 

“I mean it’s not like they’re the fuckboys group.” When Chaewon said that, Y/N was still looking at them and immediately turned around. 

“No, they’re worse, at least the fuckboys are self-aware of how awful they are” she sighed.

“Oh my God you’re so dramatic,” Chaewon said rolling her eyes before going back to typing at her computer. 

Y/N shut up and went back to try and drill a hole through Yeonjun’s head with her gaze, sadly, without any success.

As if on cue, the boy turned around, looked at her, smirked, and turned back to speak with Changbin, making her avert her gaze and awkwardly look around to find God knows what.

She couldn’t take it anymore, her heart pounding in her chest was beginning to feel like it was too much, she could literally hear it and the sensation made her shudder. She got up and headed to the bathroom searching for some quick fix to the sudden heat of her body.

As soon as she got there Y/N quickly splashed her face with some cold water to try and stop it from getting all red, failing miserably. She looked defeatedly at her reflection.

“This is a PSA for that tiny voice living at the back of my head, I am kindly asking you to shut up” She lightly hit her head with her hand in the process so that the point would go across. 

“You understand me??” The girl sighed and took a step back from the sink to exit the bathroom, but as soon as she turned around a familiar face was standing leaning on the door frame.

“Try hitting it harder next time, that should work better.” He chuckled lightly before taking a step towards her.

“This is the girls’ bathroom, Yeonjun” Y/N backed up and glared at him for what was probably the thousandth time that day.

“Sorry, I was headed to the guys’ bathroom but something here caught my attention” he smirked once again. 

Y/N was on the verge of breaking. That smirk. He had to know the effect it had on her. Or was it just a stupid habit of his? 

It didn’t really matter. Either way, she wanted to kiss him so badly right now. And subsequently, run away, completely change identities, go to Peru, and start a potato plantation or something, to hopefully never be found again. She would never EVER admit to wanting to kiss that boy.

Frustrated even more than before, she ran back to the table where Chaewon was waiting for her, shoving Yeonjun in the process, and making him audibly laugh, clearly enjoying how easily he could fluster her.

“I gotta go, or I’m going to be late for the party,” Chaewon said the moment she saw her best friend enter her view.

“Again” Y/N added to Chaewon’s statement, knowing how long the blonde usually takes to get ready. The other girl got up and quickly added:

“Remember, I’ll be at your dorm around 10 pm, we’ll see what to do from there. Remind Ryujin too when you get home, please.” Chaewon said while collecting all of her stuff and messily throwing it in her bag.

“Sure thing, I’ll finish this chapter and go home too in a half-hour or so. Don’t worry about Ryujin, knowing her, she’ll be all dressed up already. You know who you should be worried about, though.” Y/N answered, looking up from her books.

“I already texted Karina, I told her I’d be at hers around 9:30 so she’ll hopefully be ready when we actually get there.” The girl chuckled at her best friend’s trickery and waved her goodbye, mumbling a “perfect” in the meanwhile.

On her way out Chaewon was stopped in her tracks by a slightly taller figure.

“Hey there,” he sweetly addressed the girl.

“Hi Wooyoung, I’d love to stop and chat with you but I really need to go.”

“See you at the party, then” Chaewon looked at him surprised.

“You should really stop eavesdropping other people’s conversations. Besides, you don’t even know which party we were talking about, there’s like 5 every Friday night without counting the ones outside of campus” 

He gave her a playful smile and said “Don’t worry, I’ll figure it out.” The girl laughed and answered “Good luck, darling” before going her way.

After that Wooyoung quickly got back to the guys’ table where all of his friends were sitting, trying to finish some sort of group project.

“Okay, talking about important things, what do you guys know about parties tonight?” Wooyoung said, sitting down.

“You mean here in the campus? or in general? Also like, frat houses or bars?” Soobin started throwing questions at him to try and narrow down the search.

“I don't know, man, Chaewon was talking to the Menace and they said they were going to a party tonight.” Wooyoung just answered him calmly.

As soon as he heard the words “Menace” and “party” together in a sentence Yeonjun’s interest was piqued. He looked at Wooyoung, completely ignoring the semi-blank document opened in front of him.

“Well I don’t think they’d go off campus, the Menace is too lazy for that, she’d want to be as close to the dorm as possible.” Soobin started the brainstorming session.

“That still leaves like at least five or six parties” Changbin pointed out, then turned to Wooyoung and asked:

“Is it just the two of them?” to which Wooyoung quickly added Ryujin and Karina to the mix.

As soon as Karina’s name came up Changbin and Soobin looked at each other and said: “Keystone Lodge.”

“Is there something I don’t know?” Wooyoung asked given how the boys answered the place of the party seemed obvious but he had no idea.

“Karina’s boyfriend, Jeno. He’s in the frat.” Soobin pointed out.

“Okay but aren’t parties at KL like, invitation-only or something like that?” Changbin quickly raised the question.

Yeonjun, who had just started fantasizing about what could’ve happened at the party and had no intentions of having his dreams ruined just like that, said: “don’t worry guys, be prepared, I’ll text you later.” and quickly got up and gathered his things before exiting the library.

“Does he have to do it every time?” Soobin asked.

“He got it from Mark, says it gives him the surprise effect later on and the mysterious effect right away.” Changbin answered rolling his eyes, to which the other two guys only answered almost in awe with an “Ooh.” probably thinking it was the best idea a man could have.

“Okay, how did you get us in Yeonjun?” Wooyoung asked, almost alarmed at how quickly and seemingly easily their friend acquired the invitations.

“I know Haechan, and he owed me. He still does.” the older boy simply stated, raising Wooyoung's alarm instead of calming him down.

“Now let’s get this party started” Yeonjun exclaimed walking up the stairs to Keystone’s Lodge with a smirk on his face.

“You’re going to try and make her life hell, aren’t you?” Changbin said clearly amused at how his friend was planning on being even more annoying to Y/N than he usually was.

“Just wait and see Changbin, just wait and see.” the smirk on Yeonjun’s face growing with every step to the door he knocked on, where they found a guy standing alone, waiting for proof of invitations.

Inside the Frat house, the music was blasting. The air felt damp and everything smelled like cheap alcohol, adding to the mix the group of smoking boys at the far end of the room anyone could imagine that the atmosphere was not very romantic. Which is exactly what they expected.

Changbin went straight for the bar, getting everybody something to drink as the other guys scanned the room for their targets. 

Wooyoung quickly saw Chaewon sitting on the couch with her friends. They were talking to a few frat guys but they seemed nonthreatening enough to his ego. The Menace was sitting dangerously close to one of them, almost in his lap. Wooyoung could not recognize the guy though, no matter how much he squinted.

He nudged his friends and with a nod pointed the scene out, hoping they would get curious and approach them, so he could flirt with Chaewon once again. 

As soon as he realized what was going on, Soobin turned to look at Yeonjun’s reaction, gesturing to Changbin to hurry over, so he could witness it too because despite what those two liked to admit, they had this tension between them that was almost romantic. They were definitely, on some level, attracted to each other but they would never admit it. That’s why Changbin Soobin and Wooyoung were now staring at Yeonjun, hoping to catch a glimpse of whatever they had theorized.

Yeonjun’s brows furrowed. The night just started and everything had to be so simple already, not even a bit of a challenge. He sighed, took a drink from Changbin’s hands, and turned to Wooyoung. 

“Let’s go say hi to your princess, shall we?” Yeonjun told his friend, who was very happy about the poor lighting, meaning the other boys were not made aware of his rosy cheeks prompted by Yeonjun's comment.

As they approached, Chaewon saw them and a big smile tugged on her lips. She raised a hand to say hi and the boys did the same.

“Well Well Well, I’m surprised to see little Sherlock actually did find us.” She chuckled looking at Wooyoung.

“I told you I could do it. I’m very resourceful” he winked and the girl lightly laughed. 

Everybody then fell back into conversation, except Y/N and her mystery guy, who were so distracted by each other that they didn’t even say hi to the newcomers. 

Yeonjun cleared his voice. 

“I know you don’t like us Y/N but not saying hi is simply rude, even for you.” He smirked, knowing very well what it did to her.

The girl turned around, her surroundings didn’t make it easy to hear but she was sure she heard a voice talking to her. 

From her sitting position she looked at the new figures that had joined the conversation. And then she saw his face. She simply rolled her eyes.

“Who even invited you here? Seriously, please tell me so I can avoid the lunatic all night long, people just become crazier and crazier by the day”

“Actually,” Yeonjun chuckled.

The guy whom Y/N was talking to gently removed his hands from her hips, feeling a bit embarrassed. 

“I think that might have been me,” He said. 

Y/N looked at Haechan with a void expression.

“You’re his friend?” She asked, not believing it for a moment.

Haechan was slightly taken aback by the question, thinking the answer to be obvious, so he simply answered:

“Yeah?” at which Y/N glared at both the boys.

“That’s a shame, I really liked you.” And with that, she got up and went to the bar to pour herself yet another drink. The alcohol was probably what made her act so suddenly with that silly explanation but even sober her had no intention of being affiliated in any way with Yeonjun.

Seeing how Y/N was behaving, the boy thought that his mission was going to be such a delight with how simple she was making it.

Yeonjun followed her, leaving behind their friends absorbed in whatever conversation, and a very confused Haechan sitting on the couch.

As Y/N approached the bar, she bumped into a few people obstructing passages left and right and leaving her even more annoyed than she already was.

She took one of the red cups and poured herself some beer. 

Not the ideal drink but it was the first thing her hands were able to grasp. 

As she was about to take a sip, a hand snatched her drink.

“Thanks, I was very thirsty,” Yeonjun told her, earning a glare once again that day.

“How do you manage to be so annoying Yeonjun?” Y/N said while pouring another cup, this time she grabbed some gin, sensing she would need something stronger than a beer.

“I give it my best, just for you” he grinned.

Y/N couldn’t help but groan as she looked for the soda to mix her drink.

“What did I ever do to you? Have I offended you in any way? Are you holding a grudge from your past life?? Why do you like to annoy me so much??” She sighed in defeat.

“Woah,” Yeonjun said taken aback by the sudden seriousness of the question.

“Well, for starters I could ask you the same thing…” He answered calmly.

As she started to protest he shushed her.

“Buut, I am not going to lie, I do find you very cute when you’re frustrated” He chuckled.

“Are you hitting on me?” She asked, mouth agape.

“Do you want me to be hitting on you?” There it was again. The stupidest grin on the face of the earth. If there was a way to wipe it off instantly, Y/N would’ve gladly taken that chance. Thinking about it, there was a way, and to be honest she had reluctantly considered that way many times before, but always ended up avoiding it.

A kiss was not the solution, everything it could’ve done was only create more problems.

She was snapped back to reality by Yeonjun waving his hands in front of her eyes. She had been staring at the grin for god knows how long. A faint red was starting to tint her cheeks.

“You want to kiss me so badly,” Yeonjun told her, the grin never leaving his face.

She tried to play it as cool as possible, hoping the poor lighting of the room helped her conceive the blushing situation.

“Projecting much?” She smiled turning on her heels, determined to get out of the house for some fresh air.

As she walked away Yeonjun screamed over the music.

“I never said I wouldn’t like it” Y/N briefly stopped in her tracks, surprised by the sudden confession. Thinking it was just another way of getting under her skin she slowly reached the door and opened it, stepping out onto the backyard.

“You just love messing with her, don’t you?” Chaewon said as she approached Yeonjun, Wooyoung by her side, holding her waist.

“I have a tendency not to lie, actually. Everything I said is true. She’s just… compelling” he tried to find the best word to describe her.

“Compelling? You mean messing with her like that is compelling?” Chaewon said, a bit offended that Yeonjun enjoyed toying with her friend’s emotions like that.

“Tell me Chaewon, when have I ever done anything truly bad to her? All I do is tease, in her opinion, when in reality I was always simply…” Yeonjun said, meanwhile Chaewon tried to start a list of all the times he’s gotten you frustrated and quickly realized most times it was just his very annoying, twisted way of ... 

“Flirting,” Chaewon said, shocked. She looked at him straight in the eyes, her expression painted with shock.

“Oh my God, you just flirt with her” Chaewon continued. She suddenly realized that every time Yeonjun ever talked to Y/N he was flirting, and that enraged her friend for some reason. He never actually DID anything bad to her. He never insulted her, let alone take action to actively ruin her day. The only times he did something of the sort she was always with a guy, like 10 minutes ago with Haechan. Yeonjun was always just… flirting with Y/N.

“I am very confused.” Wooyoung said looking at his two friends.

“You never admitted it to us and it takes you like three seconds to tell it to her best friend? I kinda hate you and I am not sure I would like to be friends with you anymore.” Wooyoung continued while watching Yeonjun's every move and acting offended.

“It’s not like you guys ever really asked, I thought it was obvious if I have to be honest. She’s pretty, she’s smart, she can be a pain in the ass but she’s one of the nicest and kindest people I ever met. Not with me, which I can not really comprehend, but if teasing her incessantly is the only way I can get her to interact with me I don’t think I will ever stop.” Yeonjun said earnestly to his friend. A small smile appeared on his features, almost sheepishly.

A voice behind him startled him right after.

“What did he just say??” it was Changbin, who basically screamed in his ear after he heard just half of the confession.

“I think he likes the Menace!!” Soobin screamed at Changbin (and in Yeonjun’s other ear) in hopes of being understood over the loud music.

Meanwhile, Y/N was outside, freezing because she forgot to bring a jacket. 

Why did he have to always be so annoying, why did he always have something to say that would just make her heart beat at a worrying speed? Why did she have to like him so fucking much?

As her mind birthed the last few words she stopped pacing back and forth on the grass.

Of course, she liked him. It seemed as if every stupid decision she could make she would take and this was not even a conscious one. 

It would explain why her fight or flight response would kick in every time he would even just look in her direction, and her choice was fight. 

Thinking about kissing him all those times was not just a stupid silly thought. 

Y/N was hopeless.

"So?" The question was raised suddenly by a voice she recognised immediately.

He was standing right there, in front of her, handing her her jacket.

She happily took it, silently thanking him with a smile before muttering.

"So what?" her eyes looking at him defeated. She liked him and he was just playing. He was just teasing, and look where all that teasing led her. A terrible position she never wanted to be in.

"Am I getting that kiss you so badly want to give me?" Here he goes again. Non-stop teasing.

This time Y/N did not find it in her to fight, not him nor the feelings she finally realized she had.

"You should be more careful with your words Yeonjun, one might think you actually want it, crave it even" she said calmly before chuckling lightly. She was now sitting down on the bench and her gaze was everywhere but the boy's figure.

"As I said when you were storming off, I do think I'd enjoy it" he slowly sat down beside her, surprised by her tone. This felt more like an actual conversation now. It didn't seem like she had any intention of fleeing this time around. Just them two, talking like normal people. It was new and he liked it. He liked it more than words could explain.

"Stop teasing me please, I honestly don't think I can take it anymore. I won't be bothering you again if you promise me you will leave me alone without uttering any other word that you don't mean" If someone were to pass by and listen very closely, the sound of Yeonjun's heart could be heard as it was cracking and falling apart like glass under extreme heat.

She didn't want to see him anymore, but what was worse is that she didn't think his words were honest. She thought he didn't mean it, ever.

He meant it from the first smile he flashed her, from the first hello he said. The first time he saw her he was struck by lightning and did not feel like himself anymore. All he could do was think about her, all he wanted to do was to speak with her. He did not care if it meant he had to endure rolling eyes and frustrated groans, at the very least he was interacting with you.

"So?" this time she asked the question. Her eyes showed how hurt she was and he could barely look at them.

As he turned to face her, Y/N noticed tears welling up in his eyes. She didn't understand.

"You really think I don't mean it? Y/N you consume my thoughts in the best and worst way ever. I think about you all the time. All I ever want to do is speak with you and I don't care if it means you'll hate me, I won't stop doing it because I am selfish like that. I don't want to feel miserable, and the only way I have to do that is if I speak to you. You can tell me you despise me a thousand times but I won't care as long as you're in front of me, addressing me, acknowledging my presence." As Yeonjun spoke Y/N could not believe his words. 

If it was just minutes ago she would've joked about how "you're so obsessed with me, jeez" but at that moment the expression on Yeonjun's face was making her want to cry. It seemed like he meant it.

He did mean it.

"You like me?" she asked, furrowing her brows in confusion.

"I think like is a bit of an understatement at this point..." he chuckled looking into the distance, the palms of his hands rubbing against each other awkwardly.

Y/N moved closer to him. He did not register how close she got until she turned his head towards her with her hand.

They stared at each other, they are not sure for how long. It could have been mere seconds or hours on end. Then she moved closer and finally kissed him. 

She tilted her head as he deepened the kiss. 

Everything felt good. They were finally happy.

[spindle-girl]

Flare 2.7

walking to the train stop with new friends/mentorees + Sveta

“What Victoria was saying, how she was saying she was happy, seeing the kids happy, and how she felt energized after.  I don’t have that.  I don’t have a way to recharge when I’m not at one hundred percent.”

same

“I like people, parties, noise, really letting the walls drop away and having fun.  There are things I’d want to go out and do which I can’t.  Things I’m not comfortable talking about with Kenzie present.”

or not

“Weld’s kind-of dad figure was the Director in charge of the Boston PRT,” Sveta said.  “He was also kind of in charge of looking after Ashley, because her town was close to Boston.” “Making sure she didn’t do too much damage?” I asked. “Yes.  And gradually trying to get her used to the idea of cooperating with the good guys, making sure she was staying reasonably healthy.  They reached out regularly, letting her know there were better options.  Except that Ashley was a different Ashley.”

i wonder if he was the guy that wanted to recruit Rachel and she was his first run at it since it didn't seem to go as well. i do have a hard time believing that any of the Directors would try something like this to the extent Sveta is describing. i know not all the Directors were the same per se, but that kind of job typically has a specific type of person in it just through standard policies

That put Tristan, Byron and Chris close to center, Kenzie out west, Rain out to the far northwest, me a bit to the east, and Sveta and Ashley a bit further to the east.  With the trains I was figuring it might take about four or five hours for Kenzie to get to where Sveta and Ashley were situated.  It would take Rain another couple of hours, depending on how far north he was.

has anyone made a map for Gimel? just asking out of curiosity since i've seen a couple ones for Brockton Bay

“Tinker stuff breaks,” I said. “It does,” Kenzie said. “It would also be liable to break or break down when you needed it to work the most.  During disasters, or times when there aren’t a lot of downtime.” “That’s very true,” Kenzie said.

lay off the girl Victoria she's trying to help :/ am i forgetting a time where she had a bad experience with tinker tech or is this just wildbow trying to tell the audience tinker stuff isn't as good as they make it out to be? the one time i remember tinker tech not working out is maybe the Arc 4 fight with Leet, but that's his whole thing, and the explosion Coil used to fake his death, but that was on purpose.

Oh, Leet's teleport failing to drop the real Skitter on a bomb in Arc 16 too, but again that's Leet's passenger hating him. Every other case tinker tech worked exactly as intended and even better

“It’s an attempt on my life,” Rain said.  “Lives could be lost.  I don’t want yours to be one of them.  I would feel insanely shitty if you jumped in to help and you got hurt or killed.” “Insanely?” “Yes.”

not too surprisingly to hear from the guy who's power make a guilt aoe attack

“Whatever you’re going to say, I’ve heard it before,” Sveta said. “What the fuck’s going on with you, huh?  What’s wrong with you?” he called out. I turned my head to look at him.  Sveta squeezed my arm, then shook her head a little. “Hey, you’re weird,” he called out.  “You’re freaky.”

i hope no one tried saying this was unrealistic like they did with the bullying cause yeah, people will just be assholes for no reason

I stopped in front of another piece of graffiti.  It wasn’t crowded in with anything else, so it stood out, almost a piece of art in how it was spelled out on a ruined wall, half-toppled. THIS IS HOW THINGS ARE NOW I had the paper in my hand, I had my doubts, but the nagging feeling ceased being nagging and became acutely clear as I looked at the statement. “Fuck that,” I said.

a bit on the nose, but fair enough

End thoughts:

yay Tattletale! fair warning, i'm not going to be unbiased when she comes on screen. also, Victoria joins Taylor in never fucking sleeping and going out to do dangerous shit lol

[chromatophoria]

Pre-Wenclair in a toxic Enid AU.

Bianca: Addams, real talk—you need to stay the fuck away from Sinclair.

Wednesday: Considering that she and I are share a room, that would be an exercise in futility.

Bianca: Bitch, you know what I mean. I see how you’ve been looking at her. I’m telling you right now that it’s a bad idea.

Wednesday: What rapid-onset neurological disease are you suffering from to assume that I would ever debase myself with juvenile feelings of attraction—

Wednesday: —let alone harbor them for the technicolor train wreck that is my roommate?

Bianca: *eye roll* You keep telling yourself that. Look, Sinclair may seem all candy-coated funfetti on the outside, but on the inside?

Bianca: Inside, she is one-hundred percent industrial-grade toxic waste.

Wednesday: You can’t be serious.

Bianca: Deadly. We’re talking delusional levels of self-destructive compulsory heterosexuality—

Bianca: —along with what has got to be an Oedipus complex, which is why she gets off on your little homoerotic spats—

Bianca: —and a frankly disturbing tendency towards obsession that makes the movie Misery seem like a sterling example of a “harmless parasocial relationship”.

Bianca: That’s all on top of your standard low self-esteem and textbook abandonment issues, like crazy cherries on a psycho shit sundae.

Bianca: To put it in a way you might understand, Enid Sinclair is twenty circles of fucked up in a nine circle Hell.

Wednesday: And this concerns me how?

Bianca: Are you shitting me? That bitch is a bottomless blackhole. She will swallow any and all attention you give her and still need more.

Bianca: Sure, she’ll fuck you blind and brainless. She’ll even make you feel like the center of her goddamn universe. But then she’ll turn around and dump you for some dime-a-dozen dick, because she “can’t possibly be gay”.

Bianca: I’ve seen her do it, Addams. I don’t care how heartless you think you are, because in the end, she will find your heart and rip it right out of your goddamn chest, then eat the absolute shit out of it.

Bianca: *utterly serious* She will fucking RUIN you, Addams. Comprende?

Wednesday:

Bianca: 🤨

Wednesday: *squirms*

Bianca: 😐

Bianca: 😡

Bianca: Oh my fucking god! You’re turned on, aren’t you?

Wednesday: Preposterous. It is simply that even I am unable to fully suppress the sheer revulsion that your patently ludicrous scenario engenders.

Bianca: Bitch, you are actively touching yourself right now.

Wednesday:

Wednesday: You are mistaken. I am checking on my hidden arsenal.

Bianca: Uh huh. What hidden arsenal? Your two diamond-tipped throwing darts and a sopping wet cuntlass?

Wednesday: *glances down at her own wandering hands*

Wednesday:

Wednesday: Yes.

Bianca:

Bianca: *comes to the irrefutable conclusion that her rival is a high-functioning dumpster fire*

[evenmorefatallyobsessed]

Considering we've got Azula and Ty Lee "sorted", so to say, have you any ideas for: Mai, Suki, Toph or maybe even Katara?

Only ask, cause I can't find a definite no for them, unless I've missed that post.

Okay, so Mai is with Zuko, I don't care what anyone says, I don't care about the comics, Zuko is with Mai and Mai is with Zuko. As far as I'm concerned when she got fed up with him talking to his dad she tied the new the new firelord up and showed him why she mattered more then his secrets.

I refuse to believe that the same person who betrayed Azula for Zuko and was ready to die left him for keeping a secret that wasn't a affair or murder.

Hell, I'm not a huge fan of NTR but if in the next Avatar series it's revealed Mai or Zuko married someone else then as far as I'm concerned they still ended up together behind closed doors and she merely became Zuko's most important secret and whoever dared to marry him or her suffered a life of cucking for trying to get between the Firelord and his emo true love.

As for Suki, there is no way in hell she didn't end up with Sokka, I am 100% sure she beat the asses of anyone and everyone who tried to flirt with lord boomerang.

Also a hundred percent when he died I am convinced his spirit ended up with Yue and maybe even took in Suki too.

Finally Katara, we saw her and Aang's kids, while I love Zuko, Sokka and Iroh more then the avatar himself I still Love Aang, there are simply four good boys in Avatar, I would say there are no bad/ crap boys... But Jet.

So yeah I see aang with Katara, and lowkey I can't remember if we ever see a image of older milf Katara but lowkey Older Aang is one handsome fucker (Sokka too)

Lowkey after RWBY's boys, I might try and make Zuko, Sokka and Aang models and then their respective ships.

Toph... Hmm? Short Awnser, I don't really know? Maybe? I genuinely never thought about it before

[aylacavebear]

Retribution Chapter 6

Summary: You had DID for most of your life, over forty years, since you were two. It wasn't until after you were forty-three that you were finally able to heal it and become a singular. You're a hunter and have been with Dean for a very long time. Once you become singular, you have to face the horrors that your mental illness subjected on those you cared about, loved. Can you get past seeing yourself as worse than any monster you've ever hunted down?

Pairing is Dean Winchester x Reader/You

Warnings: Talk of DID - Dissociation Identity Disorder (AKA MPD), Mental Health Issues, Alcoholism, Thoughts of deserving to have it all done to "you".

Please, if you suffer from any mental illness, seek help. There are people out there who can help you get through it, no matter how alone you feel now or how hard it may seem.

A/N: This is going to be very dark, darker than anything I've written thus far. It will include many triggers - abuse both sexual and physical - in memories and what happens to the reader. I'm hoping it will have a happy ending but right now, I am not sure where this will go. This is your main warning before you begin reading. A/N: Dreams and Memories are indented in italics. Thoughts are in italics only.

----------------------------------------- Chapter 6 - While You Sleep

Dean leaned down and kissed your forehead before tucking you in, turning off your light, and joining his brother and Cas back in the library. The last month had been hard on all of them. The two weeks you’d been gone had been the hardest. 

Dean had lost so many people throughout his life that he thought that, in a way, he thought he was bad for everyone around him. When you left for those two weeks, though, he realized he couldn’t lose you, too. He also vowed that when he found you, he was going to do everything he could to help you heal your illness.

“Whiskey?” Sam offered, breaking the tense silence as he slid a full bottle across the table for him, which he caught. “She’s at least gonna get some sleep now. How you holding up?”

“I’ll live,” he sighed before taking a decent swig from the bottle, needing to dull the worry still consuming his mind.

“Cas, are you one hundred percent sure that the other personalities are gone?” Sam asked, still questioning it. He’d read up on enough to know that healing wasn’t always possible.

Cas met Sam’s gaze with a steady resolve, “When I looked in on her nightmare, I also looked at her memories from the night she left. They are gone. She was in a dark place. She needs people to give her the chance to trust herself again.”

Sam knew you’d never been like this before, seeming as though you were broken. Even with everything you’d done to his brother and the verbal abuse you had put them both through, seeing you like this was worrisome. Another personality always came out and took over when one got too depressed or emotional. He sipped his beer, considering Cas’s words. 

“She’d different, Sam,” Dean began quietly, fighting tears that had been threatening to fall since he’d brought you dinner. “She’s… softer.” His voice was laced with uncertainty.

He didn’t know how else to explain it. It was just something he felt, and he always had a hard time putting his emotions into words. Unless, of course, it was anger. That was always easy. He sipped the whiskey, trying to think of other ways he could help you.

“How is she gonna be, when she wakes up?” Sam asked Cas, mirroring Dean’s worry.

“Hopefully, not as depressed. There wasn’t a lot I could do for what she has already remembered. I let her have some of the memories, just not as detailed, only a few. She will remember what she’s done over the last month and have a vague idea why. It will give her the time she needs to work through it, very slowly,” Cas explained, glancing toward the hallway where the rooms were, just as concerned for your wellbeing as the brothers.

“I don’t recommend her sleeping in your room yet, Dean. It could trigger memories to come forward too quickly, even after what I did,” Cas added.

All three of them were worried about you. The last month had been completely out of character for when you’d had DID. There were times your personalities would take off, but it typically only lasted a couple of days, and you always answered your phone. They were beginning to wonder if you’d ever hunt again, as that, too, could trigger memories you probably didn’t want to remember.

Dean and Sam remembered, though. Sam couldn’t count how many times he’d traced your phone, finding you in a different motel with some random guy. Dean had told himself it wasn’t the personality that loved him, that she would never do something like that. The one thing that circled his mind was how much of her was left in you. 

“I’d say to stop thinking about it, but I don’t think either of us are going to be able to do that till we know,” Sam sighed, seeing his brother lost in his thoughts again.

“We’ll see how she’s doing tomorrow. For now, I’m just gonna go slow with her,” Dean told him, but there was a sadness in his tone even Cas was able to pick up on.

Dean’s mind wandered back to some of his favorite memories of you.

It was early in your relationship, and you’d had to sleep in the Impala that night, but Dean hadn’t minded. You were wrapped up in his arms, and he could hold you close against him in the back seat. Sam was still sleeping in the front. Dean was awake, though, just watching you sleep. The way your hair fell partially over your shoulder but not in front of your face. How your breathing was slow, like you were in a peaceful, dreamless slumber. Your hand was on his chest over his heart. When your fingers twitched, it made him smile, feeling the movement through his shirt. He watched you inhale deeply, then yawn before your eyes began opening. He rubbed your shoulder gently with the arm he had under you, “Morning, Sweetheart.” “Mmmm,” you hummed as a smile spread across your lips, too sleepy to say anything. “You sleep okay, cramped on this backseat with me?” he asked quietly, not wanting to wake his brother. “I love getting to sleep in the Impala with you. We have to stay close, or I end up on the floor,” you replied, giggling a little as you looked up at him. Dean caressed your cheek, looking deeply into your eyes. This was the moment he realized he loved you, at least this personality of yours. She was always so sweet and caring, and she knew how to laugh at things. You’d been hunting with him and his brother for half a year now, and it was these moments that had meant the most to him. You were a damn good hunter, well, that personality was, but this one had his heart.

“Dean, did you hear anything I just said?” Cas asked him.

“Yeah, sure,” Dean answered. Then he sipped his whiskey, realizing he had gotten completely lost in his thoughts.

Sam’s brows furrowed in confusion, “And your thoughts on the matter are…?” he asked, trailing off at the end.

Dean rolled his eyes, “Alright. I didn’t hear you.”

Cas sighed, slightly frustrated, “Tomorrow after she wakes up. I, was suggesting that perhaps she shower and you help her set up a room that is all hers. Something that has nothing to do with her DID. It might help her.”

“Huh, that is a good idea,” Dean mused, now letting the thought play through his mind, hoping she’d be okay with it. It might even give him a chance to ask you a few things without pushing other things. He did still want answers. He couldn’t hide that tiny flicker of hope that ignited within him, “Maybe it’ll give her a way to start over.”

In a way, that’s what they all felt like you were doing, starting over. The only difference, you were attempting to pick up the pieces of your life that your personalities had left shattered at your feet. You wouldn’t be alone, though. The three of them were your family, and even though the abuse you’d put them through, they all loved you in their own way. 

Dean’s gaze fell on the bottle of whiskey, and a small smile played along his lips for a moment.

“Come on, share,” you begged, reaching over Dean again, trying to grab the bottle of whiskey.

“Kiss me first,” he told you playfully.

The two of you were lying on your shared bed in his room, which was now both of your room. He was on his back, and you on your side. You were watching him while attempting to reach over his chest to his other hand, where he held the whiskey bottle just out of your reach. Dean smirked, loving how playful you were being. “Fine,” you replied, quite playfully, before placing an intimate kiss on his lips.  His other hand moved to the middle of your back, holding you against him as your hand rested on his chest. This was the personality he loved and that loved him. When you went to pull away, he held you closer, smirking against your lips, making you giggle. Music to him.  Dean rolled the two of you over, careful not to spill the open bottle of whiskey before setting it on the night table on the other side of you. He never broke the kiss as his hand came down and caressed your cheek. “I love you,” he said softly, now looking into your eyes. He could see it, the way you felt for him. You were the only one who looked at him like that.  “I love you too,” you whispered, smiling back up at him.

“Dean, are you even paying attention?” Sam asked, wondering where his brother's mind was.

He sighed heavily, “Sorry. What were you saying?” he asked, now looking up at Sam.

“Cas and I were talking about DID. It’s not something that just goes away overnight. Do you have any idea how long or if she had been doing any sort of therapy?” Sam asked, recapping what he and Cas had talked about.

Dean had to think about that before he could answer. He hadn’t seen you doing anything that could be therapy, “Well, I found her alone a lot, with a laptop.”

Cas furrowed his brow in curiosity, “What do you mean, and for how long?”

“Uh, well, she would disappear a lot around the bunker. When I would find her, she always had her laptop open to something but would close it and not let me see. I think for at least the last five years, she was doing that often,” Dean explained, wondering how it would even help.

Sam and Cas looked at Dean, somewhat puzzled, as he hadn’t said anything about it prior to tonight. “And you’re just now telling us about it?” Sam asked, trying not to sound annoyed.

“I didn’t think anything of it before. Some of her personalities did weird things,” Dean attempted to defend himself.

“If she’s been at it for five years, that would make sense as to why it recently happened,” Cas thought out loud, his gaze on nothing in particular.

As the brothers waited for Cas to say something else, Dean’s mind again drifted to his memories.

“But we watched a western last night,” you groaned, seeing the moving waiting to get played on the screen. “Come on, Sweetheart. We can watch something else after. I promise,” he attempted to convince you in that sweet kid way he always did. You rolled your eyes but gave him a playful smile before plopping on the couch next to him and cuddling up close, “You know I can’t tell you no when you get like that. It’s cheating.” You gave him quite the pout, which made him laugh. “Now, who’s cheating?” he teased you, slowly bringing his hand down your arm and to your side. You managed to keep the pout—that is, until he squeezed his hand on your hip, causing you to squeal with laughter. Dean was smiling ear to ear as he brought his other hand to hold you in place the more you squirmed.  “That’s not fair!!” you squealed between fits of laughter as he tickled along your ribs. Dean loved hearing you laugh and seeing you happy and smiling, as they were few and far between those days. He didn’t keep it up long, tickling you before he stopped to let you breathe. You were the one he loved, and your eyes always danced when you laughed. He caressed your cheek as your giggles subsided, but your smile never faltered as he looked into your eyes with utter adoration, which you returned. That look spoke the words neither of you needed to say now.

“I swear, Dean. It’s like you’re not even here,” Sam snapped, pulling him from his thoughts.

Dean sighed, “I can’t help it. What’d I miss?”

“We were talking about what she would have been doing at Crowley’s,” Cas told him, puzzled as to what kept pulling Dean from the conversation.

“She wanted to get Crowley to somehow put her through the same abuse she put us through, for the same amount of time or longer,” Dean told them and shuddered at the thought. “Although, she wanted it done to her tenfold.”

“That’s why you asked me to help her, isn’t it?” Cas asked, finally putting all the pieces together.

“Yeah. It broke my heart to see her in so much pain,” he mumbled, then took another swig of his whiskey. 

Sam sighed, “You’re not going to be much help to her if you go down the same path of self-destruction.”

“I can put my own stuff aside and be there for her when she needs me. I’m only drinking like this because I know she’s gonna sleep all night, and I don’t have to worry about her waking up in tears or trying to take off running again,” Dean told his brother firmly. He’d backed off the alcohol since Cas had brought her back, and he needed this tonight. He needed to relax as he’d been on edge for the last two weeks.

“For the first time in a long time, none of us have to worry about her,” Sam agreed, finishing his beer.

They’d all worried about you in different yet similar ways. Most of your personalities had been self-destructive, which always caused problems for those who cared about you. Like the random men in motel rooms, even when Dean was sound asleep in your shared one. The verbal conflicts they started on purpose, then hid the memory of from your other personalities. 

Half the time, you didn’t even know there was a problem, and they all hated having to tell you about it. If they did tell you, it hurt you emotionally, and that always caused another switch. It was a never-ending pattern that none of them had seen a way to stop without forcing you into a mental hospital. Dean alone wouldn’t allow it. He had stayed firm in the belief that healing had to be your choice.

What none of them could fathom now was why you had chosen to do it all alone for the last five years. That was their biggest question, followed by what kind of person you not only were now but would be once you got through all of this.

“You think she’ll ever hunt again?” Dean asked as if he was lost in a daze again, staring at his whiskey bottle.

Cas turned his attention to Dean, contemplating an answer, “It’s hard to say. Only time will tell now. Let’s get her through this before we worry about that.”

“I can send any cases that come up to other hunters while we stay here to help her,” Sam added.

“Did you update Charlie and Eileen?” Dean asked, finishing off the bottle of whiskey.

“Called ‘em the night Cas brought her back. They wanted to come by, but I told ‘em now wasn’t the time and that I’d keep them posted,” Sam explained.

“Good. We’ll see how she is tomorrow before those two stop by,” Dean chuckled.

Charlie, Eileen, and you had hit it off the moment you’d met and were practically sisters at this point. The downside, a few of your personalities had a thing for Charlie. Charlie had reassured Dean numerous times that nothing had ever happened between the two of you, but he always wondered. That was mostly due to how thick the flirting had gotten, even if it was never physical.

Would you still be into chicks? Dean thought to himself.

“You think those two will still flirt with each other?” Sam chuckled, remembering how badly Dean had blushed numerous times hearing the things that came out of both your mouths.

All he could do was shrug. There were so many things he didn’t know. One of the ones that was burdening him the most was whether or not his Y/N was still a part of you. He wasn’t sure if you’d still feel the same toward him, and that would be worse than if you’d died.

“Dean, you might want to be there, when she wakes up tomorrow. If you’re up for the task, she’ll need a rock to lean on, even if she won’t know how to ask,” Cas told him sympathetically.

Dean sighed, tossed the empty bottle in the trash, then quietly went into your room. For the first time in a long time, you looked peaceful in your sleep. A soft smile crossed his lips as he just watched you sleep for a moment. 

He slipped off his shoes before carefully sliding into bed behind you and snuggling up close to you. Dean let his hand gently move down your arm before he laced his fingers with yours, rubbing the side of your thumb with his.

“I’ll always love you,” he whispered before closing his eyes, hoping he would sleep peacefully next to you for the night.

Sam and Cas stayed up a little while longer, sitting in the kitchen mostly in silence. Sam wanted to believe that the personalities were gone, but something was nagging at the back of his mind. He’d done enough research on DID to know that it ‘didn’t just go away’, even after half a lifetime of in-depth therapy.

Part of Sam hated you for how your personalities had treated not only him, but also his brother and their friends. He kept this from both his brother and Cas, not wanting to make things harder for Dean than they already were.

----------------------------------------- Chapter 7 - Picking Up the Pieces Pt. 1

Retribution Master List

Tag List: @jc-winchester @nancymcl @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx

[iobsessoverfictionalmen]

The Sounds of Justice (3)

Warnings: canon typical violence, cursing, non-consensual drugging, descriptions of character death, car crashes, lying, manipulation, mentions and descriptions of jail, guns, yandere themes, mafia AU, mafia Rafael Barba (trust me, he needs the warning), mentions of rape (not to the reader), and unwanted advances (nothing happens to the reader).

Chapter 3

“Is Abby usually that…” Sonny struggled to find the right word.  “Excitable?”

“How do you mean?”  Bishop asked with protectiveness barely concealed in her voice.

“When I showed her the analysis machines that we use, she linked her fingers, stretched out her arms, stared at the machines, and then said, “You are my babies and I am your benevolent ruler!”

Tony chuckled, “That’s our Abby.”

“Speaking of tours, we give you the tour.  We’ll break into groups or pairs.”

You ended up paired with Fin and he escorted you around the precinct, pointing out the important places and most notably, the break room.

“What did you do before you worked here?”  He asked.

“I worked for the Behavioural Analysis Unit as a profiler.  You?”

“Narcotics.  Worked there for over ten years.”

You let out a low whistle, “That would’ve been rough.”

“No rougher than working sex crimes.”

You leaned against the island in the break room, “Have you ever had a case where you realise that your case is actually part of a bigger one?”

“I hate those.  It means more people have suffered.  Usually there’s politics at play as well which makes it more complicated than it needs to be.”

The two of you lapsed into silence.

“What do you think about this one?” Fin asked.

You rubbed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose with your fingers, “I can already tell that it’s a bad one.  Not only has your guy become our guy but Abby has located three other cases with a few similarities in the tri-state area.”

“She works fast.”  Fin remarked approvingly.  “We only recorded the third case a couple of days ago.  Seeing as you guys are the feds, I’m guessing you have access to that data base.”

“She does.”  You agreed “She’s a sleuth in the truest sense of the word.  And yes, we do.  If it helps, we don’t spend our time trawling through your data bases just because we can.”

“I’m not sure whether to be relieved or insulted by that.  Do you think this case is part of something bigger?”

“The murders appear random.  So far there’s nothing that connects them which means there’s nothing to tie them to our unsub.”

“Unsub?”

“Old habit.  It means ‘unknown subject.’ Since there’s no connection yet, I only have a vague idea of a profile.”

“How does that work?  The profiling?”

“Basically I gather all the information in my head, piece together bits of information that seem like they belong to the same group and create a portrait based on that.  With the right amount of information, I can determine ethnicity, age, height and build and behavioural patterns.  But I’ll only do it once I’m one hundred percent sure and I’ve collaborated with my team.  Otherwise I risk getting it wrong and starting a witch hunt.”

“In all my years in narcotics, I’ve never seen anything like this.”  Fin revealed, “The amount of sophistication that an operation like this would take speaks to me of a professional touch.”

“Do you think a gang could be behind this?”

Fin shook his head as he leaned against the cupboards and rested his hands on the bench behind him, “While I’ve seen some sophisticated gangs with the technology to pull something like this off and the ability to stay one step ahead of law enforcement, I feel like we’re missing something crucial.”

“What if it’s more than one gang?  United under a particular person?”

Fin nodded slowly as he thought it over, “Smaller gangs can slip under the radar and they’d be more inclined to work for someone bigger in exchange for protection.  Especially if they’re working with rival gangs under the leadership of our mystery guy.  Question is: who?  Who would have that kind of power to unite them?”

You let out a moan, “Which brings us back to our original problem?”

“Not only that.  We’re no closer to figuring out why and how your boy was involved.”

“Well, how did you find out about your guy?”

“Witness called in a failed rape.  Said that the intruder burst into his home and shot straight towards him.  Grabbed his clothes and tore them.  Just before things could get worse, the intruder keels over and dies.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.” Fin confirmed.  “Victim was pretty shaken.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet.”

Footsteps reached yours and Fin’s ears at the same time and Tony appeared in the doorway to the break room.  You knew it was serious when he didn’t make a quip about you finding the break room first like he normally would have.

“Anonymous caller just phoned in that there is another victim.”

“Same MO?” Fin questioned.

“Looks like it,”  Tony replied heavily.

[plantinghobbies]

Growing Pains

Two: Sure I’d Never Be Found

Author’s Note: Back from some traveling and finally had dedicated time to write. I’ve been overwhelmed by the support for the first chapter. Thank you so much, revisiting your notes kept me motivated when I struggled to focus or hit a block. The incredible @solipsisticno1 also helped keep my ass in gear. This’ll be a fast and slow burn (I’m a Gemini so cannot escape my love for duality). Welcome all constructive critique, favorite parts, questions, etc - so grateful for any and all feedback. Ok, here’s more of Tess and Matty.

It’s the longest he’s spent near mountains since he left home. Growing up, the idea of vastness had scared him; he doesn’t like to be reminded of how small and microscopic his existence is in the very grand scheme of things. Sometimes, he’ll lie awake at night fixated on just how tenuous life is, how quickly something outside of his control could end it. He wonders what he’d be remembered for – his art or his infamy? On particularly bad days, he wonders if he’d be remembered for long at all.

But the panoramic views of the peaks from the house the label rented him have the opposite effect. After years of touring in cramped bunks and living in packed cities, he feels the space around him palpably, like he’s been curled into a ball for too long and is finally able to stretch out.

When he’d announced his plans to spend the band’s hiatus working on some solo material with Jack in the States, he’d been most nervous about telling his band mates. Even though they’d always been supportive of each other branching out in various ways, this felt different somehow. It was one thing for George to work on remixing the odd single or producing with other artists, it was quite another to put out a whole solo record as Matty was planning, with a potential tour as well. But, as they had for the last twenty years, the guys had his back one hundred percent.

What he hadn’t anticipated was the call from his mum that came in the night before he left. She’d seemed antsy when he’d seen her for a bon voyage dinner two nights ago, but he chalked it up to her not wanting to say goodbye.

“Matthew, I’m still not sure if I should even be telling you this, had to really talk myself up to it. But I know I’d be kicking myself later if something happened.” There’s a tremor in her voice that he hasn’t heard in years.

Oh God, he thinks, she’s sick. Worse, she’s dying. His mind already flashing to her funeral, him attempting to perform a song for her before he breaks down in tears, failing her in this final act.

“You know I am so proud of you, and I wouldn’t ever dream of questioning your sobriety. But you’ve never been on your own like this without your support system – and lord knows neither have I – but it’s not easy. So I just need to say be careful, be vigilant, ask for help when you need it. I’m a plane ride away.”

The indignation that reared up at him was visceral. 34 years old, several years in recovery, and she still didn’t trust him. Looking back, he knows he could have handled it better. He’s proud of himself for not blowing up at her, something a younger version of him would have absolutely done. But he knows he was curt, wanting to punish her, inflict hurt like what had welled up in him at the thought that his own mum doubted him.

After the first few days of wandering his house, un-showered and aimless, he’d begun to see what his mother meant. The process of writing and recording is inherently unstructured, at least for him, filled with days where he does nothing and nights of manic activity. It’s him, sitting around with his own thoughts, picking at the scabs and scar tissue of his past. He didn’t realize how much he relied on the rhythm of others - the band, the tour - to provide structure for him. For the first time in his life, he is without those things, and the space that it creates feels like a blessing and a curse.

In the couple of weeks since, he’s settled in a bit more, has found a gym and can now navigate to Jack’s studio and back without relying on his phone. The word routine has always rubbed him the wrong way, evoking images and associations that make him uneasy. Boring. Pedestrian. Old. When he left rehab, they’d armed him with a written routine to help ease his transition back to his “everyday life.” It was cookie cutter shit that he hadn’t even done in rehab, let alone out of it – daily meditation, making his bed, a gratitude journal. One glance at the word and the list of to-dos had him pulling up his dealer’s number before the plane had even landed.

When he finally got clean for good, a new therapist suggested he develop a structure in lieu of a routine. At first, Matty didn’t understand the difference, and he’d worried that he’d once again sunk a ton of time into bettering himself only for the system to fail him.

“What do you like to do for fun?” His therapist, David, asked. The question caught him off guard, he was expecting the beginnings of a diatribe on the benefits of eating healthy.

“You mean, besides heroin?” Matty often tried to get a rise out of David but had yet to succeed, his shit-eating grin met with nothing more than a stoic quiet. Sometimes, when he was bored or couldn’t focus during their session, he’d imagine what David’s home life was like. What does this guy do for fun? Is he a Saturday golfer and Sunday churchgoer like he looks? Or does David leave the prim façade at work, shedding his tweed jacket on his way to a BDSM club or an after-hours rave?

Finally, David indulges him. “Yes, besides heroin.”

That was easy. “Music.”

“Ok, but music is also your job, which can be a source of stress. What do you like to do besides making music?”

He’s embarrassed to admit he’s a bit stumped. Over the years, he’s amassed a laundry list of abandoned hobbies – some lasting for a few days, others a few months. But only one has ever lasted long-term. Well, social media but that’s more of a habit he’s adopted to avoid other, worse vices.

“Umm, honestly, I don’t know. I haven’t really ever been able to keep up with one long-term besides writing songs.”

“Ok” David smiled “let’s start there.”

In the end, he was glad that he stuck with it. Nowadays, Matty had a simple list of things that he liked to do that help him feel his best – he isn’t regimented about doing them, which he thinks is how he’s been able to stick with it for so long. They didn’t cure his addictive cravings but they kept them at bay. He still resented the amount of effort that was required for him to have a “normal” day - but it was better than the alternative.

Given how late he got in from the studio the night before, he should still be in bed. He and Jack had been holed up for almost two days straight, capitalizing on a burst of creative energy that had them laying down the rough cuts of three songs and the outlines of a fourth. When Jack had finally gone home to Margaret, he’d kicked Matty out of the studio as well, demanding that he shower, eat and sleep – in that order. He’d caught a few hours of shut eye but the chord progression he’s stuck on has him unable to quiet his mind enough to rest. What’s new? Unable to even muster the focus needed to make tea, he settles for coffee instead. The expensive coffee machine gurgles next to him as he stares out the window, realizing that he can’t remember the last time he’d been outside. Maybe “touching grass” (he refuses to admit that he might be too old for certain phrases) would help unstick it?

It’s the first time the front porch has seen any action since his arrival and he takes a minute to get situated, shifting his chair this way and that. Finally satisfied, he looks up just in time to catch the vaguely familiar side profile of a woman walking by with her dog. Before the image registers in his brain, she’s gone. He finishes his coffee then heads out to jui jitsui before meeting Jack.

That afternoon is one of the most productive days in the studio so far, he feels like they’re getting somewhere. He’s desperate to sustain the momentum, to try to quell the intrusive, insecure thoughts that he can’t do this on his own. No amount of encouragement from Jack has helped, he needs to see it for himself.

He’s not above relying on superstition and decides to do everything the same the next day, including watching the sunrise on the porch, staring at the coffee as he swirls his mug. The jingling of a leash has him tilting his head up, eyes journeying up long legs, tracing an hourglass figure that had been hidden by the bar, meeting her piercing eyes – yep, that’s her. He leans forward in his seat, casting about for a witty comment to put her on her heels the way she had put him on his with that story the other night. But he doesn’t get a chance, her eyes seeming to look right through him as she passes by.

At first, he convinces himself that she just didn’t see him, unable to accept that he hadn’t left any impression on this woman. The next few days find him inching his chair closer and closer to the sidewalk each morning, but her and her dog just sail past without a second glance, seemingly immune to his presence. And listen, he’s not a dickhead - it’s not like she owes him any acknowledgement. He understands more than most how rare uninterrupted time to yourself can be in this day and age. But he hears her daily greeting to the older man who sits on his porch reading the paper a few doors down! So, it feels like she’s ignoring him specifically and intentionally – and the question of why is driving him mad. It scratches at sensitive scar tissue where his admittedly oversized ego meets a more fragile self-esteem, seizes on feelings of being unremarkable and weaponizes them. Has his overactive mind casting about for various reasons for her silence, most of them bad. She doesn’t recognize him, not even from the other night. Or worse, she does.

The rest of the week in the studio is a bit of a wash.

Saturday finds him bored and antsy, with little to do and even less motivation. Trying to occupy himself, he sets his sights more firmly on getting a rise out of her, any acknowledgement really. Just to get her to crack once, he tells himself, and then he’ll leave it be. He doesn’t dwell on why he gets so bothered by apathy, physically shakes away memories that surface uninvited in his mind - his mother’s glazed expressions, his exhaustive attempts to garner her attention. Getting a reaction from people was his coping mechanism long before it was his job.

Pulling the Adirondack chair - so cliche but also so bloody comfortable – right up to the fence, he positions it at an angle in clear view of the sidewalk. Sure enough, as she approaches, her eyes land on him from behind her sunglasses. He only knows this because her step falters slightly, head dipping into the barest of nods as she passes. The thrill that Matty gets from even this subtlest reaction is a welcome change from the monotony of the last few weeks. He can imagine what George would say if he saw this “Christ mate, you’ve got to get out more.” But George isn’t here, none of them are – and that’s the problem isn’t it?

The next day, it becomes clear that she is, in fact, fucking with him. She’s walking toward him, her mouth opens to speak – Matty slides forward in his chair at the sight, ready to declare victory – and then curls it into a smirk at his earnest reaction. It’s obvious enough that it had to be intentional. Oh, game on.

His tendency to hyper-fixate is a blessing and a curse, making him a better artist but an occasionally insufferable human. He’s determined to not let her get the best of him this time around, spending downtime in the studio brainstorming how to get her to break first. The answer comes to him as he’s standing outside, having a cigarette between writing sessions. The sign hanging in the window across the street is just too cringe, too cliche, too absolutely perfect to ignore and Matty strolls out of the store with it not two minutes later.

The next morning, he’s giddy with anticipation. As she turns the corner her head is down, almost as if she’s determined not to see or been seen. At the last second though, she glances up and clocks the sign leaning against the outside of the fence right, him seated next to it with a sly smirk on his face. She stops, stares, and then - right as he’s certain she’s going to maintain their silent standoff - she barks out a laugh. It is loud and raucous and feels like a well-won prize after two weeks of continuous effort.

“Oh my god, where did you get that?” She seems surprised to hear the sound of her own voice. If she’s disappointed that she’s “lost,” it doesn’t show. He begins to tell her, in his trademark roundabout way, a winding story about the fucking writing block that him and Jack ran into which led to him being outside, to seeing the store but then back around to the song that he was working on. She is nodding along but glances at her watch twice, the dog trying to pull her to keep moving, bored of him. She opens her mouth to interrupt him, a split-second pause where she huffs and seems to question herself, before rushing out with “Listen, I gotta get this guy to the park or he’ll have a meltdown, you can tell me the rest as we walk.”

She walks on, not giving him a chance to respond as he hustles to catch up with them. He meets her on the sidewalk the next morning, not giving her a chance to pass him by again.

[beachyserasims]

♡ Intimate Moments | Jasmine & Justin | GENEVA ISLAND

* Justin is sitting on the bed upset and Jasmine enters *

Jasmine: Hey! I’ve been looking all over for you! What are you doing hiding out in here anyways?

Justin: Oh, hey, ummmm… I don’t know, I just feel more like being alone these days I guess…

Jasmine: Hmm, that seems so unlike you.

Justin: Yeah, you are right. I honestly had no idea it would be so difficult to be in here.

Jasmine: I’m sorry, I know exactly how you feel… Do you want to talk about it?

Justin: Sure, but I think I’m mostly confused.

Jasmine: How so?

Justin: Well, what changed after Blakes left? I thought we were… Well I guess I didn’t know exactly, but I thought our connection was strong enough to start a solid foundation for a relationship. Was I wrong?

Jasmine: No, you weren’t wrong. I think, for me, the relationship I had with Blakes, while it was short, it impacted me a lot… We moved sooo fast, and then you came in and everything changed just as quickly.

Justin: Are you nervous that will happen with me? Cause I really don’t see that happening…

Jasmine: No, its not like that exactly. It’s more like I don’t want either of us to move too fast and possibly blow up… Cause Blakes got really hurt and I feel so guilty about that… I never want to go through that again or put someone else through it.

Justin: That makes sense Jasmine, but I want you to know that I am one hundred percent about you and I ending up together.

Jasmine: What about Judi?

Justin: I like her, I really do. But we aren’t as great together as you and I… I know cause I think about you all the time, and I know it’s bad, but, even when I’m with her, I can’t help but to think and wish I was with you. I’ve had enough time to know that you are the one I want. I have no problem telling Judi that either if that’s something you want.

Jasmine: Everything you say sounds so wonderful and perfect, I’m just nervous.

Justin: You don’t have to be, but I get it. I’m not expecting an answer right now, I’m just asking that you think about it.

Jasmine: I will.

*Jasmine and Justin hug*

The Start || Beginning of Episodes || Previous || Next

[luescris]

Spoiler warning for Sonic Prime below, beware

So many things are going in my brain right now. A million different trains are running a million miles on high speed and I have no way of knowing which one to start with because oh my god

I finished watching Sonic Prime. And safe to say I am absolutely gobsmacked

What a show. From start to finish. There's so many things that I want to say about it. The characterization, the emotion, the animation, the end. Some of it may be critiques, but not in a bad way. I'm just. Genuinely. So happy that we got this.

What I will admit though, was that the fight scenes in this season seemed to be a little bit dragged on. They were bearable and fun to watch for sure, and there was not much happening, but I think I understand why they did that. 😆 Everything else though. Man

Shadow was the best he's ever been in forever. Just for starters. We need more of that Shadow on so many levels. The Amy's consistently teaming up with each other, calling each other sisters, holy shit?? That was the greatest ever????? Not only that but Dread naming Black Rose the Captain was so amazing I can't even like. Find the right words. It fit so well and I literally was vibrating like augh Like in general Amy had such good representation throughout the entire show, in fact both her and Shadow have and those were the two that I was worried for the most and I am so glad that they did them right

Sails and Mangey though. I thought they were gone for good for a long while there. When they returned I was so very freaking happy like aaaaa

Nine's entire deal was definitely An Experience, and I don't mean that in a bad way he was certainly a goober, but the concept of an evil Tails man. Very scary indeed HFHDDHD

But then. There was freaking. The moment where Sonic was about to blip out of existence. Where he turns around to the Amy's and goes "Goodbye Roses". And then when everything came together again and he called her "sweet Amy." With that look on his face and that stance. Am I the only one that feels vindicated?? That screamed and ran around out of pure excitement??? Like am I reaching or was that genuinely them telling us he one hundred percent has a thing for Amy??? I genuinely do not know but my heart wants to say yes and I am on the floor.

My only question is; what the heck was with that end?? I know they said that it was meant to be part of the games somehow some way but like. They don't show anything? The only thing we get is Eggman saying he needs a bigger fleet and that tells me that maybe this is before Forces??? But I genuinely have no idea augh

Does anyone else know?? Can anyone else figure that out like augh ahshhdsh

I really want to like. Dive super deep into all of the things Sonic no doubt has to tell his friends about what happened and his feelings about fighting Nine and maybe even missing all of them in a way and just. Yeah man wowie

Also the fact that Shadow appears out of nowhere to everyone except Sonic and takes the Prism somewhere, and he was like "I go wherever I want" that was so funny, especially since he too knows what happened like aidhdhdhdhhs 😂

But god man. Honest rating is 8/10 show. There were moments that were cheesy but ultimately it was amazing, and I loved watching every bit of it. :D I am so very sad to see something so great go so fast, but I suppose that's the nature of Sonic I guess lmao 😂

[titanicfreija]

Rise-26 has concerns

"So you're just answering questions."

"Yeah...?"

"From. The. Not 'a', but The mother fucking Empress. Caiatl. Leader of the Cabal Empire, which spans multiple solar systems; possessor of tech that fucks with Darkness and Light alike; who staged a fucking coup with fucking Ghaul--who shut down the Traveler and kicked our collective ass-- to overthrow Calus, fucked as he was, the guy that psychically linked himself to magic fungus and spread himself over the galaxy. You're taking questions like some kind of celebrity from the most powerful non-god we deal with?"

"Would it make you feel better to know it feels more like being interrogated? I get that you're upset about it, but she isn't Ghaul or Calus, and she's not interested in finding an excuse to kill us."

"She doesn't need one!"

"Actually, yeah. So me giving her one would be meaningless."

"The fuck can you tell an empress, anyway! What doesn't she know that you do?!"

"The difference between being suffocated by crushing or airway blockage."

~

"...Did she really ask you about that?"

"Nah. She did ask if I get scared when I die, though."

"Auuuggghhh! Of course that's what she would ask, and you are the worst one to answer."

"I've mentioned how much you hate being shot twice. Which reminds me, I think that's my shields. Your armor is thin but the shields can be modified with--"

"Focus, meathead, I'm trying to make sure your fat New Light mouth doesn't start an intergalactic war."

"Oh for-- It's not a hundred percent safe, but Sunny can mute my comms whenever she wants. All three of us, actually. They've been making little rules for the interviews since Neomuna--"

"Hang on, what?"

"I told you what happened. Sunny didn't remember anything and I couldn't talk about it for a while so she went to ask Caiatl and Nimbus. Caiatl mentioned not knowing anything about Ghosts, and Sunny, being the guiding sunbeam she is, wanted to help and offered to answer any questions. I can't tell you how their conversations evolved, but Sunny started it while I was meditating, they'd go talk for a bit. Then she started hanging out with her while I was sleeping and she was in range, and now they're talking via comms when we're in range. I don't know if they've been doing that without my knowing or if the first time she did it included me on accident or intentionally-- but yeah."

".... Guiding Sunbeam who is trying to upset all the politics."

"The world is ending, no one has time to get petty."

"This is precisely the time to get petty."

"Hunter."

"You do sound jealous, though. That's not why you're getting in on this, is it?"

"I was jealous, but hearing what they talk about is helping. Why are old people so weird?"

"What, talking about the nature of existence and shit?"

"Nature of your being, is what she said. Talking about being a Guardian, the resurrection stuff and what it means to not die like that. Asking about fear of death and if it hurts, like I said. If I could have shot someone else's Ghost instead of Sunny."

"Oh, shit, okay I see. Questions she really can't ask anyone else. Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

"...."

"I said I didn't want to be that kind of person, but I am and I could but I'd feel bad. And then I went on for a while about why I'd feel bad. Cos you know how much I love Sunny, but even Three with Ghost and Thomas with Rex, and I can't.... It's a fucked up question, it was a fucked up order, and she's still learning exactly how bad because she's getting to ask some jackass real personal, prying, triggering questions, instead of trying to guess by sideways remarks from Zavala, bad explanations from Sunny, or me crying in front of her because she reminded me too sharp when she said sorry."

"And giving her a grand view of a weak spot isn't a bad idea to you?"

"She knows the Ghosts are our weak spots."

"This just screams bad idea."

"She likes Sunny. And I'm really some jackass. And she doesn't have to posture at me. And she likes this."

"... She has been shot before, why would she need to ask you?"

"I didn't survive. It's a little weird, I've never really thought about any of it, but I'm usually too busy thinking of an answer to worry about how she's gonna feel about it."

"Like what? What's weird?"

"What would you do if you met someone that killed their own Ghost?"

"... Yeah I can't... What... Can this person.... What?"

"Yeah, that's what I said. Couldn't even imagine a person that could do it, what they'd act like. Said they'd spook me. But then I said something like, I'd be more freaked out by someone who was okay with killing their own Ghost. And said that killing Ghosts in front of their Guardians is fucked up."

"It is."

"She didn't know that!"

"... Oh."

"I mean, she's not stupid, she probably knew it wasn't okay, but she didn't realize-- we all feel like that, and didn't realize we would feel each other's pain regarding our relationships and stuff, like us flinching when talking about Sagira and Brya and Rex."

".... Huh."

"Yeah, normal common knowledge to us, stuff we think is obvious-- she thought they were just chatty conduits, tools, not friends, let alone tied like we actually are, ways keeping even Rex and Thomas together."

"So Sunny helped?"

"It's been progressing for a while. She doesn't really talk to me about it, said it's rude, I'm pretty sure she just doesn't wanna tell me how much shit she talks. Can tell some shit, though. Set her off digging into history books and shit, questions she couldn't answer or got inspired to ask."

"Like what?"

"... Awoken Politics, for one."

"What's the real story there?"

"Awoken Politics is what I feel is safe to tell you. Shithead doesn't know when to let a question stay unanswered. That shit was the potential war."

"Ohhhhh..."

"Yep!"

"And. She's been answering questions. Like what?"

"I don't know. She won't tell me. A shitload of, "what the fuck are they doing" followed by "Why", with a bunch of just, "why" because she can tell what we're doing."

"... Fair enough. Seriously, though, why? Why does she care?"

"She's working pretty tight with us and we're unpredictable idiots and she wants half a clue? Fun? Curiosity? She seems to want to know more about the classes, our early days, the connection with the Ghosts and each other, and piddling other shit. Oh, she asked what my first memory was."

"That's another weird one."

"Sunny said she was probably testing my awareness on waking up."

~

Hard Questions

New Angle

Honest

Radio Chat

Scripted Questions

Battlefield

Fear

Enlightening

More like Interrogation <-

(In)humanity

Underlying

Ghost Affection

[kiillerqueen]

❝ I know that you know him well enough to be able to judge his character , so there is no need for you to convince me. However I do plan on having a little sit down with him just to get a feel of how my plan is working. I know he probably won't be honest with me but I am just going to go straight to the point with him about his feelings for Amelia. It will help me also figure out if I need to have Gabriel push harder to be successful. Plus I am sure I can help build doubt into his head about his relationship with Amelia. ❞ Declan had no idea that he had this side to him. He has always been known the too soft Grey , the one that his father would be foolish to hand his family's business to. In a way it gave him an advantage since no one would see such a plan come from someone like him. Declan has always been told lovve makes you do things and until he met Violet he never believed such words. ❝ If you believe you know what the plan is than why don't you tell me? Unless you're wanting to make sure you're right first? ❞ The male asks out of curiosity. ❝ I just want to make sure that you're careful even if you're confident nothing too bad will happen. Well it is a real shame that they don't get to understand and see just how amazing my soon to be wife is. I have no plan on fucking things up with them. You really hate him don't you? Should I be questioning why? ❞ Part of Declan isn't sure he actually wants a a response back. Declan has been telling himself that by going through with his plan to teach Amelia a lesson that maybe in the end it will be best for both his sister and family that Mason not be in the picture. As angry and hurt Declan is with the younger blonde there is no way that he'd willingly allow her to take part in ruining their family all because she was convinced by Mason. ❝ You've saved me from having to live a life of being married to a woman that I'd likely never love. Having children and making them go through the same cycle I did. Except I would never do the bullshit that my father has done to my own mother. To our family... ❞ Declan lets out a sigh of frustration as he thinks about everything his father has done to ruin their once happy family. He hopes that Violet knows that he isn't like his old man , that there is no fear to have in him ever treating her like his father had his mother. ❝ I won't argue with you if you're one hundred percent sure that you want to take my last name. Violet Grey does have a nice ring to it. ❞ A teasing smirk forming upon the male's lips as he leans in and gives her a gentle yet quick kiss. ❝ I promise that I won't have any kind of pity for you when you tell me what you need to tell me. ❞ It is easier for Declan to say such words than actually be able to act on it , but he did promise and he isn't one to break promises.

❝ I guess it all depends on how things play out. I can't tell you if Mason is serious about he because he's never serious about anything besides winning. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it might be a miracle if he manages to come around. ❞ Most of the people in the manor were incapable of love in her opinion. They were all too self-centered and selfish to truly care about someone else's needs or wants. It was the reason why Violet was ostracized from such a young age. She happened to be the only one who seemed to have a heart. ❝ Well, I think it will be easier now that I know her, and I think I have an idea of what they may be planning. ❞ She had never been more thankful she paid attention to her courses in the manor. The femme may have hated them in the moment, but it could be their saving grace in the present. ❝ No need... She's had a thing against me since I was born... I'm used to it, ❞ she said even though she did fear the redhead. ❝ You won't be an enemy. She'll probably be happy that you picked someone in the manor, just not that you picked me. They'll expect loyalty to not break whatever agreement your father made with them. We'll be safe as long as we stick to it. And I think I'd help you regardless of if we were together or not. I don't enjoy seeing what Mason does to people. ❞

She saw his actions almost like specialized terr.orism in a way. Mason ruined families in the worst way possible; all because he hated being abandoned by his own family. Violet, now being in a position to stop him, would do anything to protect her newfound family. Even if it meant upsetting a certain blonde that wasn't too friendly towards her. ❝ I guess you're right... I'm just glad that the universe was kind enough to save you for me. ❞ Smiling softly at the touch from her soon to be husband. Violet couldn't express the love she had for this man. It's what made the complexity of their relationship worth all the trouble that came with it. ❝ You make a good point...❞ The change from a no-named orphan to a name-bearer was a huge responsibility given she'd have to keep the family legacy going. ❝ No... I'm not freaked out or anything. I've thought about this for a long time, Declan, and I guess I should tell you some things about me—My legacy... So you can understand why I think I can handle it, but you have to promise that you won't pity me over whatever I tell you— Then we can start the kid conversation... ❞

[tmntxthings]

A Witch’s Kitchen Pt. 2

author’s note: for those who wanted the confession c:

warnings: fluff, slight cursing, unedited

> part one <

—————————————————————————

previously… “No buts!” Leo said grabbing Casey’s arm just in case he tried to make a dash for it. Mikey and Raph said their polite goodbyes, while Donnie entered the portal silently. You sent him the middle finger subtly since your arms were crossed. Casey was looking at you with big puppy dog eyes, you couldn’t help but console him even with Leo there. “Don’t worry, I’ll text you,” you said smiling slightly and shaking your head. He brightened at that, “if you ignore me for an hour I’m FaceTiming you!”

You had kept your word, replying to Casey by text and answering if he called. You had gotten a little busy when you turned your attention back to potion brewing, but for the most part you had your ringer turned on. Two more days passed before a knock was heard at your front door.

“Coming!” You hollered, trying to quickly towel dry your hair, having just gotten out of the shower. More knocking was heard and you grumbled to yourself, throwing on some clothes and speed walking to the door. Opening it to see that Casey was lifting his hand to knock on the door again. “Yes??” You mused, giving Casey an expectant stare, wondering what was so important for him to try and bang the front door down.

Casey’s voice caught in his throat. Your wet hair dripping onto the cloth of the hoodie you wore. He came over because he couldn’t take staying away any longer. Ever since Leo had dragged him through that portal back into the lair he has mainly been on his phone. Texting you and waiting for replies, finding the courage to call when he felt like he couldn’t bear to go another second without hearing your voice. The two days without you had been absolutely torture, and by the second day he was quite sure his heart was going to jump out of his chest and run all the way to your place with or without his body. So… yeah here he was at your door unable to fight the love potions allure that made his wants that much stronger.

But could he really just say, yeah I couldn’t stay away, so here am I, please hang out with me?! No way, absolutely not, that sounded way too desperate even though that was exactly how he felt. “I-“ he stuttered only thinking of how much he missed you, and seeing you before him now, all flushed from a shower and smelling absolutely divine. He could hardly think straight! “Can you take me to Witch Town? I’m in need of a cure for this love potion I stupidly drank,” he ended up saying, totally chickening out on just a natural ‘I missed you.’ “Now? It’s pretty late don’t you think Case?” You had just thrown on the hoodie because it was close by, but in actuality you would’ve put on your comfy pajamas. “Plus if anyone could make a cure, that would be me, since you know that was my potion,” you explained to him, opening your door wider for him to enter.

You had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to stay away for the whole week. You were curious as to how he had snuck away, because surely Leo hadn’t let Casey come here. Unless Casey had been a total pain in the ass, which is likely since he was under love potion influence. “Well can you make one for me?” He said as he entered, closing his eyes briefly as he got a stronger scent of your shampoo and conditioner. Damn he had it bad and he just knew (from what you had told him) that he was going to fold way sooner rather than later. He didn’t want to! No not yet! He had no gauge other than two days ago at how he affected you, and he still wasn’t confident. He wanted to be sure, one hundred percent sure, that you felt the same way before he went admitting his feelings.

So he was begging for a cure, and also using it as an excuse to see you, because he hadn’t had any other ideas! “It’ll take a lot of expensive ingredients, one’s that I’d rather not buy if not absolutely necessary.. are you experiencing pain? Is something wrong?” You closed the door behind Casey, following him to where he crashed on the couch, you sat next to him giving him a once over, he didn’t look to be in pain. Though maybe uncomfortable? “No not really.. just heart aches,” he mumbled the ending. And you sighed, not really hearing the last bit, thankfully for Casey, “I’m sorry Case, there’s nothing I could do, even if I had the money it takes longer to brew cures, you’d already be over the love potion by the time I would finish!” You felt bad, even though Casey had put himself through this to begin with, you didn’t want him to be uncomfortable, and when your friends came to you for help, you helped! In any way you could, you were a real fixer in that regard.

“I understand,” and he leaned into your touch as your hand went out to his arm, trying to comfort him. If he had a tail, it would’ve wagged. “Can I hang out with you for a bit?” He asked hopefully and you smiled for him, “duh, wanna watch something? A movie? Or a show?” Casey had a lottt of movies and shows to catch up on. One of the things he liked to do most since he came back to the future, though three years had passed he still had a long list that everyone had made for him. A watch list! “Yeah!” He said excitedly, a total movie buff nowadays. Casey hadn’t even needed to get out the list (he kept a digital version in his notes app). “I’m on Harry Potter now!” Casey said excitedly as you got the remote to the tv. “You’re joking.” You said giving him a serious look. “Huh? No, why is there something wrong with that movie?” He asked worriedly not remembering who had put it on the list.

“No it’s just ironic,” you said shaking your head, wondering what were the odds that he’d want to watch a movie about wizards and witches with you: a witch. Casey soon found out why you said ironic and he immediately began to ask questions. Trying to compare the similarities and differences and you begrudgingly replied. “No we’re not divided into houses, it’s like normal school though the classes are quite similar..” “No we don’t have a The One Who Shall Not Be Named, though there is a beast we have to appease, make a peace offering to so he doesn’t destroy Witch Town, it’s a big spectacle,” you refrained from saying how Donatello had almost been the ruin of your Town some years ago.

Casey listened to you, his full attention would go to you anytime you spoke. Glancing over when you’d grumble at a scene you thought was particularly cringey to a real witch. He would get real happy when you would suddenly be really interested in the movie, not saying anything unless he asked a question. By the third movie you had popped some popcorn, fully invested even though you had already watched the series. When the fifth movie rolled around the two of had gotten comfortable on the couch, you were laying stretched out, your legs going over Casey’s lap resting there. His hands would sometimes rub over your lower thighs and knees. He himself not really noticing the action too much as his attention was on the movie.

But you would do a little double take at the warm feeling of his bare hands touching you. It was getting reallyyyyy late, and you were starting to yawn as the movie finally ended. “Wanna call it a night?” Casey asked with a small smile, noticing you were yawning yet again. “Mmmm nah we can finish, we’ve just got three more right?” Casey nodded, “Yup eight in total,” he watched as you clicked the sixth, then moved to get up, “I’ll be right back, I’m going change and grab a blanket,” you said.

Casey was left to his own thoughts as the sixth movie started playing. Was he sleeping over again? He guessed so since you hadn’t told him to go home! He of course did not want to leave and the prospect of spending more time with you made his heart burst with happiness. When you returned blanket in your hands and wearing a pajama set, Casey was smiling wide. “What’re you cheesing for?” You said going to sit next to him and sharing the blanket. “Just, I really enjoy your company,” he said smiling sheepishly. You smiled too, finding what he said cute, “right back at you Casey,”

As the two of you turned back to the screen, Casey couldn’t help his hand moving on its own accord. Reaching out to tentatively brush against yours where it rested on top of the blanket, in your lap. You swallowed, glancing down to see he left his hand right next to yours, and you knew he was letting you decide. Expressing his interest to hold your hand but not wanting to initiate. Partly because he was a gentleman and partly because he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or get rejected. Your hand turned, slowly interlacing your fingers with his.

Immediately Casey was holding his breath, the feeling of your hand in his, it was just perfect. But he was feeling greedy now, now he wanted more than just hand holding. He held himself back for maybe ten minutes before it became too much to bear, “Y/n,” he said softly and you hummed in question, still looking at the tv. You had a faint blush dusting your cheeks now that he had looked over. It only gave him the confidence to continue, he squeezed your hand and when you turned, he leaned in. Stopping just short from your lips and you hadn’t flinched away, in fact your eyes were glued to his lips. A small smirk formed and you looked up into his eyes, “do you know how badly I want to kiss you right now?” he spoke softly, his thumb rubbing across your hand that he was still holding. “Casey..” you bit down on your lip, feeling conflicted, he was basically telling you he liked you, liked you a lot more than you originally thought. “Are you sure?” you asked thinking about how much Leo didn’t trust you, didn’t like you.

“More than sure,” he said, his eyes had followed the way your teeth pulled and chewed down on your lower lip. He wanted to do that. Right after he said that you surged forward, squeezing his hand tightly and taking him by surprise as your lips met his in hot passion. He matched you instantly, kissing you back with fervor. The movie completely forgotten about as the two of you didn’t stop, kissing for what felt like forever. You two would break for air and go right back to kissing as if neither of you could stand the thought of stopping just yet. “I like you Y/n” he breathed, admitting his feelings though you probably knew that now. He had to tell you, just to be sure. “So much, I’ve liked you for a while now..” the words were thick and you answered him, kissing him again, swallowing his words. “I like you too Casey Jones,” you said pulling back and catching your breath. Seeing how flushed you had gotten, from you kissing him, god Casey felt like he was on cloud nine. “How long?” He couldn’t stop his curiosity as his free hand went to your hair, dry now, pushing strands away from your face.

“Long enough to think you didn’t feel the same way,” you said shyly, and this had his mind reeling. The two of you had potentially liked each other this entire time and had no idea of the others feelings. He was grateful for the push that the love potion had given him, that he was still currently under. “I don’t think I’ll be able to leave you alone for the rest of the week,” his hand that had been playing with your hair, grazed over your skin, making it way from your cheek to your lips. You stayed silent, letting him touch you with an amused smile. It was like he was in a trance, you pursed your lips kissing his thumb that was currently touching your lower lip. He pulled his hand away, Casey would much rather his lips there now.

The week passed by quickly. But even with the love potion off, not much changed. With feelings out in the open now, the two of you were a lot more touchy. Much to Casey’s enjoyment. He’d get back from a patrol with the turtles, and he would scoop you up into his arms the second you opened the door. Kissing all over your face and telling you how much he missed you. “You saw me yesterday silly!” You laughed. “Mmm” he kissed your nose, “too” he kissed your cheek, “long” he finally captured your lips. He slowly placed your feet back to the ground. Drawing back with a charming smile as he watched you blink out of a dazed reverie caused by all his sweet kisses. You opened your door wider, your eyes dancing playfully, “now be careful in the kitchen, there’s a couple pink drinks in there,” Casey entered, laughing. “Duly noted.” Sure enough he looked towards your kitchen and saw five replicas of the drink he had. “So you have any buyers yet?” and this caused you to smile, mischievously. He looked at you with one brow arched in curiosity. “Someone you know wants them all,”

“Someone I know?!” Casey exclaimed and his immediate thought was the turtles. But which one would want five love potions?! He asked you but was met with a shrug and he chased you around the kitchen. You laughing and him saying how you just had to tell him! You made a mad dash for the living room and squealed as he caught you, lifting you up into his arms. “Sorry Case, confidential information,” you giggled but you were serious. “Aghhhh,” Casey groaned squeezing you for a second before letting you go, “finee,” he whined accepting you wouldn’t tell him. “Don’t whine! I’m sure you’ll figure it out,” you winked. Yeah, he’d figure it out later, but right now, he was a man on a mission. “C’mere,” he said with a smirk and it only grew as you raced into the living room, continuing the game of cat and mouse. He was definitely going to catch you!