#I am ENAMORED by this because there is a layer of questions to unravel

[rarestereocats]

rundown of the impromptu session!

for awhile,  we’re without the charisma of this team (Industria),  so the rest of us head off to the monastery to have a chat with Xaren.  we need details if we’re gonna be fighting a goddess,  especially a very nasty one,  so after our discussion;  we decide we need Industria’s dad’s help.  problem is,  Tacitus lives in heaven and you know,  you can’t just go to heaven.  unless you die of course,  but the bad news there is even that’s not a guarantee.

Xaren is still adamant that he doesn’t want us chasing him into the Underdark cuz it’s pretty fucking dangerous and before Rikius can agree with that,  i make sure to let Xaren know that i am not leaving his ass down there.  and like a good pussy whipped boyfriend,  Rikius can’t say shit.  he could,  but like i said,  #whipped.

Elathera says her grandpa has a very powerful staff (please calm yourselves) he used to carry around that could help us.  a staff that when broken,  will give us one way into heaven,  but no way out;  but whatever.  we’ll find a way.  problem is,  she doesn’t know where the staff is,  but her family might know so we go and pick up Elliot and head out.  he’s pretty excited about meeting his new girlfriend’s family,  so like the absolute sweetheart he is,  he bakes them cookies.

upon arrival and being ushered inside,  Elathera gets to tell the news that she’s finally off the market.  her mom can stop trying to bribe random men to sweep her off her feet and her mother is absolutely enamored with Elliot.  his is,  after all,  the Perfect Boyfriend.  kind,  does charity work,  bakes;  he’s the whole package.  talks of marriage and grandkids are had and Elathera was dying on the inside the entire time,  but manages to grin and bear it.

after dinner,  Elathera searches the house and her grandpa’s shed for the staff,  but all she finds is a ring of keys.  she pulls her mother aside to talk about it in her room and finds out that her mother had the staff buried alongside her grandpa in their old town.  wanting to know why we need it,  Elathera explains it and while her mother’s concerned,  she understands.  after,  she rushes down to alert Elliot that his girlfriend’s ready for him while the rest of us laugh our asses off.

he gets to see the blindingly pink bedroom and points out how her summoning circle looks super out of place.  Elathera summons up a bunny to show him and he just showers that bunny in affection.  another Good Boyfriend point to him.  He mentions how nice her family is and then pulls her in for a kiss.  with the power of mage hand on her side,  Elathera has it... lock the door and fade to black cuz they totally got it on.  you guys thought i was gonna say she did something dirty with that mage hand,  didn’t you?

by night,  i head out onto the pier for some fresh air and Xaren joins me.  we have a nice heart-to-heart and i tell him that i’d die for him.  apparently not the right words to say when he absolutely does not want us dying for him.  i pull back the layers of Xaren’s Tragic Backstory like an onion (there’s a lot of onion unraveling lately) and learn that his mother killed his brothers and stuck him in a sensory deprivation chamber as punishment,  also pinning their deaths on him.

it’s there that he met Miss McNasty,  Velevana,  and after giving so much of himself to her;  she took notice and gave him a wish.  so he wished to get out of the Underdark and Velevana was pissed,  but also impressed.  Rikius walks up on this all,  but quickly excuses himself when he realizes this is a private moment.  i decide to lighten the mood and boop Xaren’s nose and he boops mine back and we decide to gossip about our relationships.

we talk about our men and then Xaren says Samuel is his first boyfriend ever.  Rikius is also my first boyfriend ever cuz i used to be all about the ladies,  so now he’s wondering why i’d pick Rikius of all people.  and insert me saying something embarrassing about how he looks like he was chiseled out of marble by the gods and boy,  can’t wait for somebody to use that against me.

next morning,  Elathera goes and helps her little brother in his eidolon pursuit.  she takes him to their grandpa’s shed and walks him through the process,  summoning a very confused Tenin.  knowing what’s going on though,  he hops in to coach Altaura through this and this kid is fucking pumped.  he does the ritual and for a few seconds,  an angelic woman who looks vaguely like Elathera is staring back at them before she flickers out.  progress!  so now he’s even more excited.

we have a nice breakfast and then head back to Florence to pick up Industria and Ilyana and head out to Elathera’s old hometown to do a little grave robbing.  it takes some convincing for Industria to be okay with what’s a little morally questionable and before we head out,  she communes with Sabella to ask if it’s alright if we decide to show up in heaven,  which Sabella is totally cool with.  she also finds out that Tacitus is forbidden from coming back to the material plane cuz the dude just loves mortals too much.

we head out and reach the old town!  because of a street vendor who has just invented corndogs and set Tenin off,  we have to think of a new codeword.  again.  we settle on “Dungeon Master”.  sounds pretty kinky,  right?  shouldn’t be a problem so long as we keep Tenin out of certain clubs.  we make it to Elathera’s old house which is surprisingly occupied.  we ask the current owner for entry and she says it’s fine,  but be careful,  the place is haunted.

Industria goes on ghost hunter on us and leads us up to a locked door.  Elathera and her cool new set of keys gets the door open and it’s her grandpa’s old room.  the room’s cold as shit and Industria calls out and immediately a voice calls out to Elathera.  we’re shocked and in fear,  i take shelter behind Rikius cuz hey,  he’s like...two feet taller than me.  nobody will see me.

Elathera gets to catch up with her grandpa and he gets to see Tenin again too.  apparently his memories are on the fritz though because he’s pretty sure his soul is incomplete and scattered across the planes.  Elathera explains our current situation and asks if it’s okay to dig up his staff and he gives her permission.  he also gives our greedy asses permission to loot his room,  to which we do.  the most notable things being a book of enchantments,  a sweet ass ice crown,  and some summoning salts.

with Rikius watching over Ilyana in the carriage,  the rest of us hit the graveyard and dig up Elathera’s grandpa.  inside the casket with him is his big,  black staff (seriously,  calm yourselves) and we put everything back in place before making haste out of there.  thankfully,  Industria distracted the guards long enough for us to struggle with grave robbing.  the staff is beautiful.  obsidian and twinkles like the night sky.  shame we have to break it.

we quickly find a spot to open the portal and with the staff and Elathera’s dreams shattered,  we go to heaven.  at the gate,  two archons guard it and basically look us over to make sure we’re right and fit to be walking around literal fucking heaven.  Xaren and Rikius garner some attention though and are to be escorted by angels as a just in case.  we’re pointed to where we can find Tacitus and also get to learn where some of our departed loved ones are.

heaven is a very beautiful place.  maybe too beautiful to have our walking disasters parading through the streets,  but we make it to Tacitus’s tower and are brought up to his office.  Tenin gets to have another existential crisis as an angel refers to him as Little Tenin,  meaning there is indeed another Tenin,  so unfortunately,  Elathera has to desummon him.  introductions are had and Tacitus and Industria are both nervous and awkward as fuck.  understandable as that is literally the first time she’s seen her dad in person.

we ask for his aid in the Velevana situation and he tells us he’ll see what he can do.  unfortunately,  there isn’t much he can do after he gave us “the mythic” and realizing some of us don’t have it,  he corrects that.  so now Rikius,  Ilyana,  and even Elliot have it.  poor Elliot who is probably confused as fuck,  but he’s handling it well.  we also learn that our material plane isn’t the only one and apparently the folks up here have a problem and were constantly resetting it until now.  we’re allegedly the last material plane to exist and will be the longest thriving one.

with Tacitus eager to answer questions cuz he’s so excited to have mortals visiting,  i ask about Asri and Lucky and he says he’ll ask Sabella about it and get back to me.  Elathera asks what the fuck happened to her grandpa’s soul and he tells her that his soul has been dispersed between planes because someone up here deemed him too powerful to keep in one place.  She also asks if she can meet OG Tenin and Tacitus says he can arrange that.

Xaren asks if he can see his brothers,  so Tacitus takes him over to his telescope,  aiming it at Elysium and Xaren breaks down as he watches his brothers talking and laughing with other souls.  they’re watching the sunrise together over there and unable to move himself,  Samuel stays back to comfort him as the rest of us leave to do our thing.

we head to the library first,  but Industria decides to check out (library pun) early to go find Ilyana’s parents and ask them if it’s cool that she adopts their daughter.  they’re surprisingly okay with it cuz they know they’re dead and gone and Ilyana needs a better life.  they have plans to go join the void at some point,  so they won’t be around heaven much longer.  Elathera also decides to peace out cuz she’s taking Elliot,  Ilyana,  Xaren,  and Samuel to meet OG Tenin.  which leaves Rikius,  an absolute nerd,  in a library of vast knowledge.  and me,  passed out on his lap cuz everything is too much in this moment.

Elathera is fucking excited to meet OG Tenin.  his office is a gym,  guys.  if that is not the most Tenin thing ever,  then i don’t know what is.  OG Tenin is super fucking tall with six wings,  fiery hair,  and is all about that sleeveless game (relatable).  he is also a fucking nerd apparently and loves music and reading.  he’s very proud of Elathera and her spirit that died when she broke that staff is resurrected and before she can ask,  he reads her mind and says that he’s more than happy to train her.

come next day,  we get a whole lots of answers from Tacitus.  including how the world and the gods came to be.  so Little Tenin is not the only one here having an existential crisis.  our minds are blown six ways fucking sideways as he talks about how the Teme-rasadar are the void and everything came from them.  deities also need constant worship otherwise they just...fade away.  

we learn that Velevan’s paired herself with a god of undeath,  so her weakness will be anything anti-undead,  but as for breaking the claim she has on Xaren’s soul,  it unfortunately can’t be done.  so i guess it’s confirmed that we’ll be literally punching her in the face.  he also drops the bomb on us that Lucky is a fucking lich,  which explains their fascination with the temple of the dead,  and right now;  they’re out there.  he says they’re not harming anyone currently,  but they’re very powerful.

he tells me that Asri is in the country,  but can’t give me exact deets.  he knows that she visited the Underdark awhile ago and also that Xaren’s dad is on the surface now.  literal goddess Sabella shows up in elven form to come speak with us and our minds are fucking blown again.

i ask her if my blood’s tainted cuz the whole lich thing and she says there’s nothing...lichy (loud booing)...in my blood,  but the Kociak bloodline is cursed.  prone to insatiable wanderlust and something more,  though she can’t say what.  the curse was a trade-off for Lucky’s lichdom,  so thanks,  asshole.  i ask her why Asri was in the Underdark and she says it’s a part of the curse.  she was seeking someone out,  though she can’t say who.  possible drow/catfolk combo striking again??  just a Game Theory.  

i’m worried that the curse is the reason Asri was a piece of shit,  but Sabella reassures me that it has nothing to do with the curse as i’m cursed too,  but a decent person.  we ask of Remy’s fate and learn that Lucky used them as a sacrifice and the reason Remy is reaching out to Xaren is to tell him something important or perhaps to even tell him that Lucky is near.

after that ominous shit,  Sabella allows Xaren to see his brothers and he gets a touching reunion.  he catches them up on some things and slowly realizes that he desperately doesn’t wanna accept whatever Velevana has for him now.  as we all watch,  i think about hugging Sabella,  but restrain myself cuz hey,  that’s a goddess.  much to my surprise,  she turns around and hugs me and my soul has transcended every possible plane and i may be in love.  Sabella hands out some more hugs to everyone like a goddamn pez dispenser and once we’re back in Tacitus’s office,  she’s gone.

we say our farewells to heaven and he kindly teleports us back to the material plane.