#I also just don't think it's ableist to look some who has delusions of grandeur in the eye and go ''world doesn't revolve around you''

[coockie8]

do u think antis have no place in the storm hawks fandom?

While I believe pro-censorship ideology doesn't have a valid place anywhere, unlike some people, I don't have delusions of grandeur telling me I'm some kind of fandom God who can dictate who is and is not allowed to participate in a given fandom ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[pepperpatrol]

I am not the "Shit Post" person. Honestly I think it's a little weird to even bother with writing something like that I'd just scroll if I felt that way. Well it's less the assumption that all abusers have NPD and more the statement that you have to be abusive to be diagnosed with NPD that you did write. Because really, with that diagnostic criteria, you don't have to be abusive and the assumption that all people with a Cluster B are inherently dangerous is a pervasive cultural norm that does do material harm to people with this diagnosis. It can be used to take away agency, discriminate in the workplace and housing. Having a personality disorder is an actual axis of oppression.

You can have delusions of grandeur, and lack empathy and be arrogant without abusing other people. I mean. I won't say that I wouldn't find such a person extremely annoying and I'll admit that I probably, personally, wouldn't tolerate that kind of behavior in a close personal relationship. But you can be like that without causing someone else material harm. People are allowed to be annoying.

And like, Cluster B personality Disorders are treatable diseases. They can't be cured, sure, but they can be regulated with a combination of medication and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. That mitigates a lot of the more self sabotaging behaviors. It is a disease that people can more or less recover from and we need to allow them to do this as a demographic.

Can individuals with Cluster B Personality disorders be abusive? Yes. Can someone with depression be abusive? Also yes. Do you have the right to eject someone from your life who is being abusive regardless of whatever mental diagnosis they might have? Absolutely. And shit, even if they get treatment and change you do not have to let them back into your life. But you do have to let them live theirs away from you.

And I just think that there's a lot of preoccupation on that ridiculous insult (which isn't really all that out of the norm for typical Tumblr hyperbolic insults imo) that you're kind of missing the point of the post. People with Cluster B and schizotype disorders are oppressed. They actually do loose their personal agency and get put under more scrutiny simply because of their diagnosis and you actually are kind of saying that the stigma against their neurotype is...you know...their fault because the symptoms of their neurotype can make having a personal relationship with them exhausting and unpleasant at times.

I don't think I have the right or the ability to weigh in on your mother because, well, I don't really know you or your mother. I honestly do hope that you can find whatever kind of resolution or peace that you can with that. I can definitely relate given that I'm pretty sure the symptoms of my own mother's undiagnosed mental illness were definitely a contributing factor in some of the more horrific things she did to me and my siblings when we were young. But like...If I demonized her mental illness I would have to demonize myself since I have the same ones.

You've got to separate the neurotype from the particular person, or people, that have hurt you because every single person with a Cluster B Disorder is not inherently an abuser and doesn't deserve to be treated that way unless they are actively doing something. My mother's mental illness didn't hurt me, my mother did.

When you say stuff like "If you got your diagnosis without a pattern of hurtful behavior, please stop bothering Tumblr and consider suing for medical malpractice." you are implying that you think all people suffering from NPD are abusers and that is ableist. You are not giving room to an entire demographic of people to be human based on a diagnosis of mental health. You haven't personally witnessed the behavior of every single person with NPD and you honestly don't seem like you're looking at them with any degree of good faith to begin with even if you had. There is nothing wrong with cutting out an individual who has hurt you but you're using their behavior to paint a wide group of people you do not know with that particular person's crimes. Just like they don't have the right to take out their mental anguish on others, you don't have the right to throw your pain at literally everyone with NPD either?

My dash today. Repeatedly. I did not go looking for hot takes I just scrolled past this twice.

Leaving aside the extraordinarily creepy “if you disagree with me I’m going to sexually assault you and you’re going to like it” bit here uhhhh

What does “it’s your fault there’s stigma against you” even mean here?

Like the reason I think people distrusting narcissists seems slightly different in kind from distrusting say, gay people, is that there’s nothing in the definition of gay person that implies having hurt others to get your way, where conversely it’s very difficult to fit sufficient criteria to be diagnosed with NPD without having hurt others. (From my read it looks impossible, but I’ve seen it argued that one specific set of sufficient criteria can be met never have hurt anyone ever, so… maybe.)

THAT is the difference. It’s like saying “stop being suspicious of someone just because they’ve committed a lot of crimes.”

If they have committed a lot of crimes, they’re still a person! No one should assume it’s impossible for them to stop!

But someone avoiding them or even recommending others do so, especially if they have a reasonable suspicion not all of them are arguably okay stuff like drug use or something, isn’t unreasonable. They have a pattern of behavior that people can see.

If you got your diagnosis without a pattern of hurtful behavior, please stop bothering Tumblr and consider suing for medical malpractice.