#I accidently went on and on in a gc about how stupid the people in a reel were being | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

crossdressingdeath · 4 years ago

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I just legit don't understand people who say that WWX giving his golden core was selfish or done only for himself. It's an argument that can only work by relying on the element of surprise created by the sheer implausibility of it, and I don't understand how it even managed to get hold in the fandom in the first place because just what mysterious advantages WWX gained from doing this? JC not dying? JC being able to be sect leader? JC not being sad? None of it is to WWX’s direct benefit,1/6

especially compared to what he lost to make it happen or that WWX was the best candidate to be the next leader if JC found himself unable to lead the sect. Plus in the situation they were in back then, even WWX knowing about the possibility of a core transfer and doing nothing at all and just watching JC letting himself die could not be considered selfish, tragic at most, because even when you love someone, you are not obligated to sacrifice your everything for them, especially when the2/6

chances of it working were only 50% at best as guestimated by WQ. So the argument that going far and beyond his duty in that situation is what makes WWX selfish is just so, so plain stupid. The spin on this argument that WWX is selfish because he didn’t think about JC’s feelings is even stupider because WWX did nothing but think about JC’s feelings? That’s actually the whole reason he gave him his core? He had already risked his life (and WN and WQ’s) to save JC from prison, and nothing was3/6

preventing JC from going on with his life other than his feelings about the situation. Of course, JC was right to be horrified and depressed by the terrible thing that just happened to him! But it doesn’t change the fact that the only reason WWX gave his core to JC was to spare his feelings; JC’s life was in danger after the golden core loss only because JC felt that his life wasn’t worth living anymore, and WWX would never have gone through with it if JC showed even the smallest sign that4/6

he could pull through. Like the whole reason that WWX didn’t speak about his sacrifice is selflessness because he didn’t want JC to feel indebted to him or JC to feel like his achievements weren’t his (WWX very well knew that JC’s first or even tenth thought wouldn’t be about how giving his golden core would impact WWX; it’s not even me gratuitously JC-hating, it’s shown in the narrative by the contrast between JC and LWJ’s reactions, LWJ who was also “lied to” and paid a terrible price5/6

his punishment, but whose first and only worry was if WWX suffered terribly during the operation or not.) We are supposed to see that JC's accusations that WWX just wanted to play the hero as absurd and in line with JC's tendency to needing a scapegoat for his own shortcomings because WWX never tried to leverage the debt to his own or people under his protection’s gain when he could very well have and went to his death with his secret intact.6/6

I mean if you think about it, the whole reason the golden core reveal happened is because a murdered teenager already resurrected once and thought dead again was freed on a accident from the prison he was left to rot in by another dead man, resurrected as a by-product of yet another man looking to avenge his brother’s death, and then the truth came out only because JC was attacking them. If not this astonishing series of coincidences, JC would never have known whose GC he has. 7/6

My response to the “WWX was just being selfish” argument is always “Okay, what did he gain from it?” It can’t be considered selfish if he got nothing out of it, especially given everything he lost doing it. You could maybe argue that he was being selfish in ignoring JC’s wishes, but JC only wanted to die because he didn’t have a core, so WWX giving him his solves that. No one would ever have known about the transfer if a situation hadn’t arisen where WN, against WWX’s wishes, told JC about it, so WWX didn’t want to play hero. WWX didn’t reveal it to try to push JC into helping him and the Wen remnants, so he didn’t want it as a bargaining chip. What did he get out of this transfer? I’ve yet to see a single “WWX was being selfish” argument that actually explains why it was selfish beyond “Oh, he just wanted to play hero”, which as I just said doesn’t make any fucking sense because if he wanted to be the hero he would’ve revealed it.

I am convinced that when MXTX wrote the golden core transfer reveal we were supposed to recognize that JC was being ridiculous and looking for a scapegoat so that he wouldn’t have to face his own failures. Everything in that scene screams to me that JC is clearly in the wrong and that MXTX deliberately wrote it that way. I mean, he spends the entire conversation about in it the temple jumping back and forth between “how dare you upstage me” and “this is the least you owe my family”! I... genuinely have no idea how so much of the fanbase became convinced of something that’s so obviously untrue.

#mdzs #cql #dis-core-se #anon #asks

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dimples-of-discontent · 6 years ago

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Hello, it is I, a 34 year-old woman who has come here to talk about someone I know who may or may not have a crush on me but it’s irrelevant because 1) he’s not single and 2) I have cancer so I’m not going to date anyone anyway. But guess what? I don’t care!! Some things just never change and the kind of “am I reading this right??” insecurity that you have when you’re a teenager just never goes away.

So, hey, if you’ve missed me I’m here to deliver all kinds of silliness tonight! I’ve been away lately because, during the week, I went to an appointment in Boston with a doctor from Harvard who specializes in the kind of breast cancer I have and (hurray!) think it really paid off and I think I’ll be treated there. Then, for the weekend, my NY-area friends and I went away to a cabin in the woods for pre-chemo celebration/togetherness. (Don’t worry; it wasn’t like a horror movie.) It was totally wonderful. I drove to and from the cabin with the dude in question. My adolescent ramblings below.

So, back in August I wrote this silly post about whether I was over- or misinterpreting my friend’s behavior. At the time, we’d been friends for about 3 months and he and his GF were long-distance. Now, we’ve been friends for an additional 7 months and she’s lived with him for 6 of those. They are now both actually my closest friends in town and really high on the list overall too. I like hanging out with them together and separately. We’ve got a neat nexus of overlapping interests so that any combination of the 3 of us has lots to talk about and a lot of fun. I’m somewhat closer to him, because we see each other SO often and because we often confide things in each other. I’m close to her too, though. It’s rare to find such good friends and, honestly, that’s the only really important thing. I have no interest in losing that.

Anyway, my read on the situation back when I posted in August is now pretty much that he was stressing out about the imminent arrival of the GF because they hadn’t been living together and she was moving there without a job just to be with him and that’s kind of a lot. I have no idea if it had anything to do with me. I think it may have, just in the sense of an additional thing. I think it’s likely that he had some level of crush on me--although even if not we were definitely good friends--and was worried about how that would change with the addition of a partner would change either dynamic.

It all worked out because the minute the three of us met as a group we clicked instantly. We spent the summer and fall going hiking together and all having long conversations in the car and on the trail. We watched movies together and threw a Halloween party. He and I see each other 5-7 days a week (since we work together) and have a constantly active text conversations (the 3 of us have a GC too). I worried about intruding, but both of them invited me to stuff and were happy to be invited. (I did find it hard/annoying to try to see either one of them socially without the other...they do the couple thing of coming along as a unit but, ultimately, I didn’t make a thing out of it b/c they are great.) I could see how much he relaxed, literally the first few hours we all met up together as it was apparent how well we all got along. So, maybe he was worried about what I was going to do myself as well as his feelings? Who knows.

So I was pretty much on the side of “this was a temporary crush that abated once GF moved in and he remembered why they were together and it was clear that that wasn’t changing just b/c I was around.” That’s true, I think. But...ok. So, I’m very much one for crushing on, hooking up with, and getting into relationships with friends. I find it hard to know any other way. This means that I’m constantly keeping a lid on low-to-high level crushes for unavailable folks. (I think my brain is just wired for romantic/physical attraction to align with emotional closeness...too bad I’m only romantically and physically attracted to men though.) So of course--of COURSE--there is a part of me that wants us to be dating. Inevitably. It’s not helped by the fact that he reminds me so strongly of my first serious boyfriend, a wonderful guy I was with for 3.5 years. And, generally, I blame myself and this fact for any over-reading of things. But then I wonder if I’m not just gaslighting myself (an expert move) b/c I am so worried about coming off as arrogant by thinking he does have romantic feelings.

There are plenty of small things aside from just the constant contact. For one, he was deeply upset by my cancer diagnosis and is taking it all (including my feelings about it) very seriously. And, yeah, that is a very valid reaction, but we haven’t known one another that long...even my exes and friends from 10+ years ago haven’t been as affected, and the people who are have have been in my life for absolute ever. I’m shocked that he and the GF are willing to go through this with me since I feel like I haven’t given them much as friends so far, but they absolutely are so clearly they are just great people.

More frivolously, when one or both of us is intoxicated or otherwise in an altered state he’ll let himself be a lot physically closer to me than usual. Like, it’s actually notable that usually he tries hard not to be touching me, in a way that just has to be deliberate. Friends sit together and knock their shoulders or elbow each other or will pat backs, ruffle hair, share blankets, lean into each other...all the kinds of touching that communicate intimacy without it being sexually charged. If we do that by accident, he’ll move away fast. Except if he’s drunk. And even then it’s absolutely nothing untoward, just drifting into my space, resting knees together. One time we were standing in line for fried food after a bar night, with the GF, all happily drunk, and I leaned into him so our shoulders and arms were pressed together as I read the menu. He moved away so that we weren’t touching. Then, a fraction of a second later, he moved back so that we were pressed together again, like he’d made some kind of decision to do it. He also *never* says anything about my appearance. Like, not even “you look nice” when I’m dressed for an event or “I like your haircut.” Maybe he just doesn’t want to be brought in to validate me or something, but again it feels like it goes against the social norms for friends but makes sense if he’s trying to conceal non-platonic feelings.

We behave enough like a couple that people who encounter us, even at work, often believe we’re together. We share food and drinks (from the same plates or cups) and often bring things that the other has left behind at our places. We have to try not to get the giggles at meetings when inside jokes come up. We tease each other with stories only 2-3 of us (him, me, and GF) know. This is all kind of dumb and, mostly, background noise to a great friendship. I decided that we’d just always have a little tension/chemistry but that we’d probably never mention it and that’s fine. That’s likely right! But this weekend he and I drove up to this cabin together (about 3 hrs each way) and things felt...loaded?

I’m getting tired, so I may need to write down the rest of my thoughts later. But, on the way up, we listened to music and drove through the dark and had some good conversations about friends, family, work, life, etc. The weekend was great (about which more later, hopefully) and then today on the drive back (which, again, is close to 3 hours) we did nothing but talk. First, about life stuff and then, rapidly, about our entire relationship histories. We’d exchanged a lot of that info before--including how much I remind him of the GF before this one, which we affirmed again when I referred to her as “the one who is basically me” and he said “yeah, and in more than the superficial ways too.” To be clear, he wasn’t talking about his current relationship or implying anything like dissatisfaction with it. There was just a whole LOT of dating history, hookup history, good/bad feelings and experiences; the kind of long convo you can have with a friend while burning miles of highway.

We took a break, got back in the car, and I laughed and said “I feel like that was pretty much my whole history but if there’s anything else you want to know AMA!”. I didn’t expect him to take it seriously but he did and basically asked “What crazy things did you do when you were younger” and I was like “in what sense? and what’s do you consider ‘crazy’?” and he was like “I mostly mean sexually...and you get to decide what counts.” So, I don’t have a totally extensive experience to draw from but I have some so I shared a few and was like “what about you?” and then he shared a few. And we had actual real conversations about how relationships make you feel and about the weird nexus of desire and shame that can happen.

Eventually I was like, “I think that’s everything I could tell you...anything else you wanted to know?”. And he goes quiet for a L O N G time and goes “is there anyone in [place where we live] that you have like a crush on?”. And I am rolling my eyes internally (and possibly externally) because EITHER this is the most obvious ploy to get me to say “oh it’s you!” that I’ve ever heard, or else he so TOTALLY doesn’t think of me that way that he’s not even counting himself as a possibility. So I just go ahead and say, “well, if you weren’t in a relationship I would want to date you” b/c I am not going to coyly misdirect. I’m watching the traffic b/c the highway is crowded so I don’t know what face he made but he says, “Thank you. I mean...yeah. I could see that happening. [pause] But what I meant was is there anyone you have just, like, an idle crush on?”. So then I feel kind of dumb because was that his way of letting me down gently? OR was it way of saying “yeah, what you’re talking about with us is more than an idle crush”?? One way makes me feel stupid for saying anything, and the other makes me feel like he pretty much just told me that we’d be dating if he weren’t with someone else - which is what I suspected but which I also thought it made me arrogant to think. (Or maybe it was just a way to not have to follow up on us both basically admitting that if things were different we’d be a couple.)

There was some other odd stuff, though none of it felt weird in a bad way just like it stuck out a little. (FYI, it was all in fun and not at all awkward - we are super comfortable together.) I was talking about how several times I’ve gotten together with guys for a short time who then went back to their long-term girlfriends and how one of my other friends said I was a “what if” girl; like “sure I have a girlfriend but what if I were with HER??”. And he was like, well yeah, that’s possible and a huge compliment b/c why not dream big? And then later said that clearly I could be a homewrecker if I ever wanted to be (though we both know I wouldn’t). He also told me about another girl who was his ex’s roommate who just started texting him again talking about how she’s unhappy in her relationship; he says they always had chemistry and that she’s reaching out b/c of that but that, obviously, he’s just playing dumb in the text messages and pretending that’s not what she’s doing. But, like, is he letting me know that other people like him? Why? Basically, I couldn’t get a handle on whether this conversation, whatever else it was, had a subtextual vibe of “I have doubts/questions about my current situation” or not.

Having typed it out, though, it sounds a bit like it does? And like they might involve me? Or that it’s just fully a “bad timing” kind of thing where we could date but obviously never will. Can we at least conclude that this is someone who is attracted to me?? It sounds like that, right?

I mean, it also sounds very silly and not appropriate to my age to be going over in such detail but, honestly, if it’s distracting me from cancer that’s kind of just good. Anyway, you are readers and writers of fic and consumers of literature so I appeal to you to let me know what YOU think is going on here...aside from the fact that no matter what I have a great pair of friends who I care very much about. I welcome the distraction....though if you could comment and not reblog that would be great. And thank you for reading this diary entry. ;)

#probably boring #but if you want you can read it #boys #what even are they #personal #single living #dating #but not b/c this is about my friend who I am NOT DATING #fic tropes #b/c honestly it is #give me your expert opinion #waste time with me #it will be fun #don't reblog #please and thank #about me #my fast-paced life #DISTRACTION FROM CANCER WOOOOO

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tastyjin · 6 years ago

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Happy Accidents

In a world where soulmates can feel what the other feels, Hoseok meets Yoongi on Club Penguin, not knowing that 1. they possibly know each other IRL and 2. are soulmates. After an incident in class, Yoongi finds out who jdope23 really is.

Title: Happy Accidents

Word count: 3.7k+

Pairing: Yoongi x Hoseok

Type: soulmate au, club penguin au, college au

Genre: not really fluff but no smut so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Warnings: minor swearing. Mentions of poop. You might overdose because of how much crack this fic is on.

Author’s note: this is my first ever fic so pls don’t come for me if it’s bad, I’m not the best writer lmao. This fic is in no way making fun of writers or anything; I genuinely had a fun time writing this and hope you enjoy it. Sorry if there’s spelling errors, I’m only human.

Requests are open!

Club penguin was a “free” multiplayer online game where people, 6 years old and up, could enter a virtual world. There you could play as a cartoon penguin, taking part in missions and games to earn coins and buy super cool merchandise, ranging from clothes to furniture, in order to complete your feng shui goals in your very own igloo!

However to be considered the hippest penguin on the slopes, you had to have a paid membership. With this membership came unlimited perks such as: being able to take part in every penguin activity on the server and even buying up to 75 Puffles— small furry pets that had no limbs and only ate Puffle-Os (whatever that is).

When you were not joining in on events and missions you could waddle around and make friends! Club penguin offered many places where penguins could chat and chill (haha get it). Were you tired from sliding down the ski slopes and in need of something scrumptious to eat? Say no more! You could head to the pizza parlor where you could relax, eat pizza, and connect with your penguin pals! Besides the parlor, there were many other places you could use the ultimate safe chat or the regular safe chat to talk to other players (let’s be honest though the ultimate safe chat was only created for 5 year olds who didn’t know how to type in the first place).

That’s how Min Yoongi (aka sugasweet66) met Jung Hoseok (aka jdope23) on one cool Monday afternoon at the pizza parlor.

Min Yoongi was a music major with a bad case of sleeping for 12+ hours a day. He had started playing club penguin at the ripe age of 17, during his senior year of high school. At first it was just a joke between his friends but it soon become much more than that.

“Hyung have you heard of this new online game that was just released a few years ago?” Namjoon asked as him, Yoongi, and Jin sat at the computer section of the library. Yoongi didn’t care enough to answer him so instead he just turned his gaze from the music video he was watching (promiscuous by nelly furtado ft timbaland) to Namjoon’s computer screen.

On it was the intro screen to a game he vaguely made out to be called club penfin or something to that extent. Yoongi’s English was not perfect.

“What is that?” Jin sat back in his chair in slight disgust, was he really spending his only study period watching Namjoon play some game where his avatar was a fat ugly penguin? I mean who chooses yellow for a skin color?

“It’s called club penguin, it’s an online multiplayer game where you’re a penguin and do missions and shit. Look I just put a table in my igloo!” Namjoon pointed excitedly at his screen, where there in his white barren igloo sat a brown wooden coffee table.

Jin scoffed as he continued to watch Namjoon mess around with his igloo. After a couple seconds of seeing Namjoon have a mini heart attack because he thought he had accidentally bought the membership, Yoongi looked back at his screen curious. The game, although probably a complete joke, looked mildly entertaining.

Therefore that same day Yoongi went home and loaded up his computer, typing www.clubpenguin.com into the url tab.

Ever since then Yoongi would come home from school and religiously play club penguin. He became very invested in the game, even going so far as to buying the membership. Over the years, Yoongi cultivated an image of being one of the coolest penguins on the server. Or should I say, sugasweet66 became known as the it penguin.

Everyone admired and wanted to be sugasweet66. Of course most people playing were 10 year olds but that didn’t stop Yoongi, a 24 year old college student, from adoring the praise and compliments given to his penguin on a daily basis.

On the other hand, Jung Hoseok was far from popular in the virtual world of club penguin. Similar to Yoongi, Hoseok was a dance major who had stumbled upon the online game one day while sitting in a gaming café with his three best friends: Jungkook, Jimin, and Taehyung.

JustinSeagull97 has created a group chat

JustinSeagull97: hey hyungs clck the lnk I’m abt 2 snd

Mochiboy: are you having a seizure? What’s wrong with your typing?

Taetae95: ^^^^

JustinSeagull97: it’s quickr ths way

JustinSeagull97 shared a link with the group chat

Jdope23: what’s the link?

Mochiboy: is that the link to that game you’re playing right now?

Taetae95: oh is that club penguin?!

Jdope23: club what?

JustinSeagull97: it’s an adventre gme where u ply as a pnguin n it’s rlly fun pls ply w me

Jdope23: can someone kick Jungkook off the gc if he continues typing like that??

Mochiboy: yeah I got it hyung dw

JustinSeagull97: no pls dnt kck me out ffs

Taetae95: kookie did you just swear???

Jdope23: jimin you know what to do

JustinSeagull97: lol he wnt do it

Mochiboy has kicked JustinSeagull97 from the chat

Taetae95: now can we play some CP?

Jdope23: sure ig

Mochiboy: ^^^^

From that day on Hoseok and his friends met at the gaming café almost everyday to play club penguin together. Although only Jungkook bought the membership, the four still had immense fun playing the online game. That’s why Hoseok continued to play even after he entered college.

Of course Hoseok would still meet occasionally with his bffs to play, he was usually only ever able to play the game in the dorms because being a dance major meant dedicating many hours to practicing.

It was right before Hoseok left for college when he met Yoongi on Club Penguin.

Hoseok had just finished packing for college when he decided to play a bit of his favorite game. He sat down at his computer desk with a content sigh; his back was beginning to kill him and he felt sympathy for whoever his soulmate was.

Living in a world where your soulmate feels whatever you feel was particularly hard for Hoseok. Of course being a dancer meant that one was prone to getting injuries and aches, but Hoseok felt immense guilt every time he twisted an ankle or missed a step while dancing and bruised his knees. Hoseok didn’t want to inflict pain onto his soulmate, whether it be purposely or not. That’s why he dedicated himself to perfecting every dance move in order to ensure that his soulmate would not be receiving pain from his doing.

Smiling to himself at the thought, Hoseok entered his username and password and was soon logged on to the club penguin server. He debated calling his best friends and telling them to get on as well; on one hand he’d have people to play with but on the other, Taehyung would most likely make Hoseok spend all his coins on stupid shit.

Deciding against it, Hoseok clicked on the map icon on his screen and soon his green colored penguin was standing in the pizza parlor. There were only a handful of penguins there but Hoseok didn’t mind at all.

A small smile spread across his lips as he began to type on his light up keyboard he had spent all summer saving up for.

Jdope23: hello everyone!

Hoseok clicked on a button and watched as his penguin did a circular motion with its hips and arms. He laughed as a few penguins around him copied his ministrations and greeted him.

He then made his penguin sit down at one of the table in the pizzeria, striking up a conversation with a pink penguin with a super cool fedora on.

UssySleigher: hello fellow penguin have you heard the news? It’s karaoke night tonight!

Jdope23: seriously?? How does that work...

UssySleigher: you just stand on the stage and sing... have you never done karaoke before?

Jdope23: I know that it’s just.. never mind. When’s it starting?

UssySleigher: right now.

Hoseok raised a brow as he leaned in to watch as a black penguin with brown spiked hair, wearing a teal shirt with dark stripes, waddled up to the stage. He nearly choked when he read the penguin’s username: sugasweet66.

“What does that even mean?” Hoseok thought as the mysterious penguin took the stage.

Sugasweet66: hello everyone it’s d boy here to use my tongue technology to spit some sick beats

Hoseok watched as no penguin except the one with the fedora replied to sugasweet66’s words.

UssySleigher: let’s get it!

Hoseok shook his head and watched as the black penguin on stage began to breakdance. He couldn’t help but laugh as the penguin began his “performance”.

Sugasweet66: I love it when you call me big poppa

Sugasweet66: Throw your hands in the air, if you'se a true player

Sugasweet66: To the honies gettin' money playin' dudes like dummies

Sugasweet66’s performance went on for another 3 minutes as he rapped the entire big poppa song. At the end of it, Hoseok was in tears and didn’t hesitate to make his penguin clap. He even laughed so hard that he fell off his chair a bit and bumped his knee on the desk.

“Ow god damn.” Hoseok hissed, rubbing his knee. He glanced back at the screen to see other penguins clapping and even dancing in response to sugasweet66’s performance.

Sugasweet66: DAEGUUUUUUUU

And with that last line the black penguin waved and made its way off the stage. Hoseok immediately grabbed his mouse and clicked next to sugasweet66, watching as his penguin waddled towards them. For some odd reason, Hoseok wanted to be friends with this intriguing penguin. Not only was their rap game strong but he was genuinely curious about them. He typed furiously on his keyboard as sugasweet66 made their way over to the counter of the pizza parlor.

Jdope23: That was an awesome performance!

At first the penguin he was now next to didn’t answer but after a couple seconds of waiting, Hoseok got a reply.

Sugasweet66: you want an autograph or smth?

Hoseok snorted. He couldn’t believe that was what sugasweet66 took a full minute to come up with.

Jdope23: sure

Sugasweet66: i don’t have a pen... or fingers

Jdope23: maybe next time then

Hoseok found himself smiling at his screen for the second time today, his hand went to his mouse and in a few seconds Hoseok had added the strange penguin. Now all he had to do was wait for sugasweet66 to accept his request.

Sugasweet66: why did you send me a friend request

Jdope23: I want to break into your igloo

Sugasweet66: ok

Hoseok’s computer made a ding sound notifying him that someone had accepted his friend request and he knew exactly who that was.

Sugasweet66.

And that’s how their friendship started. After that fateful night, sugasweet66 and Jdope23 began meeting up almost everyday on the server. They’d usually hang out at Yoongi’s igloo because he was a member, meaning his igloo was a lot more decorous than Hoseok’s.

The two would go on missions and do almost everything together. Basically they were conjoined at the pixelated penguin hip. They learned a lot about each other over the course of the two years they had played together, for example: what their favorite colors were and how many nipples they had. Although somehow they had never thought to share their real names with each other, possibly because that sort of topic was not usually discussed during their super cool hangouts at, as Yoongi called it, the genius lab.

Even after Yoongi’s penguin started gaining traction did they still hang out as if they were both just two lame dudes playing club penguin (because I mean, they were). Yoongi would still meet up with Hoseok everyday in the game and Hoseok would continuously beg Yoongi to buy him stuff with his membership perks. It was a pleasant cycle that occurred daily until one fateful afternoon, it halted.

It was a particularly warm spring morning when Yoongi was sitting in the back rows of the lecture hall, listening to his music theory teacher drone on about god knows what. It was his last day of classes before spring break and to say he was relieved was an understatement.

Yoongi was feeling exhausted with his workload lately. Balancing a job at the café, his schoolwork, and his fame on club penguin was strenuous and took a toll on him. He was more than ready to just sleep off the stress he had been feeling for the entirety of the break.

Propping his elbow on his desk and placing his head in his hand, Yoongi kept his gaze trained on the board where his teacher was currently writing notes. He was absentmindedly jotting them down when he became uncomfortably warm. He moved to take off his leather jacket quietly and after a few seconds he had succeeded, placing the article of clothing on the empty seat next to him.

However he still couldn’t seem to cool down. If anything, taking off his jacket only made him hotter (and not in the way that he would’ve liked).

Yoongi began to shift in his seat, sitting up straight for a second to find that his black shirt was now stuck to his back due to his body’s perspiration.

“What the hell is happening?” Yoongi began to panic, “Is this what menopause feels like?”

He began to look around the room, making sure none of his classmates were witnessing his potential loss of his menstrual cycle.

“Wait... don’t only women menstruate?” Yoongi soon became confused but luckily, the lecture hall was mostly empty today and those who were here were not paying any attention to his breakdown.

“Okay okay so if I’m not entering menopause then what is going on?” Yoongi, no longer paying attention to today’s lesson, was now using his kumumon folder to fan himself. The heat didn’t seem to subside as a strong wave of pain hit his abdomen. Holding back a groan, he grabbed his stomach in agony and began to rub it, hoping the notion would somehow soothe the now aching organ.

“This must be what giving birth feels like.” Yoongi thought, pulling out his iPhone 4s to webMD his symptoms and see if he was about to meet the face of the grim reaper. However before he could even put his folder down and reach into the pocket of his black skinny jeans, another wave of pain washed over him, stronger than the last.

Unlike last time, Yoongi was unable to hold back his groans. It was like someone had just stabbed his abdomen with a knife and proceeded to shove a dildo in the wound to stop the bleeding. He closed his eyes momentarily and began to try and control his uneven breathing.

A few students began to send confused looks Yoongi’s way however the teacher didn’t seem to notice or if he did, he really didn’t seem to care enough to say anything.

Yoongi continued to keep his eyes closed, his breathing returning to a somewhat normal pace. His stomach was still in pain though and his sweating didn’t seem to ease up. Yoongi glanced at the clock to see how much time was left until class would end and he could sprint to the bathroom, not sure what was going on with his body but knowing the bathroom seemed like the right place to be right about now. The pain began to crescendo and he squeezed his eyes shut when it became unbearable; he abruptly stood up when he felt an all too familiar feeling hit him. He couldn’t wait to run to the bathroom, he had to go now.

Ignoring the stares he was getting from both his teacher and his classmates, he began to climb down the stairs, cursing at himself that he picked today of all days to sit all the way in the back. He was simultaneously rubbing his stomach with one hand as the other held his belongings. The teacher was saying something to him but at this point all sound became muffled to him. All Yoongi was worried about was making it to the restroom in time before-

Oh no.

It was too late.

Just as he had reached the last step his butt cheeks unclenched and a whoosh of unrestrained air, that crackled and snapped like unbounded thunder, echoed throughout the hall. At first, Yoongi was relieved because he began to feel better immensely. Maybe all he needed was to break a little wind. However, it seemed that that was only the calm before the storm, or should Yoongi say, the hurricane.

The room remained silent as it seemed everyone was frozen in time. Some students mouths were agape and others were in utter disgust.

Yoongi had made the grave mistake of trusting that one single fart because all of a sudden, as if Noah had just parted the Red Sea that was Yoongi’s ass cheeks, shit had began to leak out of his booty. It was like the dam had broke and shit was flooding Yoongi’s boxer briefs. Shrieks and profanities originating from the students rang out into the room. Yoongi felt his face heat up, knowing at this point he must be as red as Ronald McDonald’s wig. He couldn’t move nor could he make himself say something, anything to mend the situation. Because in all honestly, there was no coming back from this.

The smell coming from his bottom was deadly and many of the students, suddenly coming in contact with the horrid scent, began to evacuate the room. Even his teacher, who just shot Yoongi a less than amused look, pinched his nose and ran out of the room. Everyone was gagging, even Yoongi because this was one shit that he didn’t enjoy the smell of.

Yoongi was the only one left in the room when he finally stopped shitting himself (literally and figuratively). It wasn’t like he could move anyways, his pants were so full of crap he couldn’t move one inch without it sliding down his legs and making more of a mess than he already was. He couldn’t believe this had happened to him today; he should’ve known not to eat the gas station gimbap his roommate had brought home last night.

Yoongi could stew on that topic later however, right now he needed to come up with a solution on how the hell he was going to get back to his dorm without trailing diarrhea behind him. ——— After the whole “shit and get” fiasco, Yoongi had managed to make it home. Currently he was sitting at his laptop, staring at the club penguin log in screen. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted to waddle around the server after what had happened. Although he soon came to the conclusion that if there was anything that could make him feel better, it was club penguin. So Yoongi logged onto the server and was met with his decked out igloo. A small smile appeared on his face when he saw that his bestie, jdope23, was also online. He didn’t hesitate to send a quick message to them, telling them to come to his igloo ASAP. Already Yoongi was starting to be in better spirits, almost forgetting the events that occurred today. Almost.

Within the span of a few minutes jdope23 had appeared in the genius lab, waddling around and messing with yoongi’s things. Yoongi just rolled his eyes, a silly grin plastered on his face as he watched the green penguin start to break dance on the mini dance floor Yoongi had in his igloo.

Sugasweet66: hey wassup nerd

Jdope23: nothing much

Yoongi began to type back a response when another chat bubble appeared on his screen.

Jdope23: Lmao sumthin funny happen today tho

Yoongi furrowed his brows as he typed back.

Sugasweet66: wut

Jdope23: literally best day eva

He sighed at this, it definitely wasn’t the best day ever for him.

Sugasweet66: u gonna tell me or

Jdope23: someone shattered their pants in class HA

Yoongi choked. He literally choked on the saliva forming in his mouth. He couldn’t be? No there was no way on God’s green earth that jdope23 was talking about what had happened to him today in class.

Sugasweet66: LOL I dnt believe u

Jdope23: no 4 rEAL! It happen in my music theory class

Jdope23: this dood let it all go right before the bell rang and it smelled like someone opened a 50 year old tub of mayo

Yoongi thought he would drop dead right then and there. His palms were sweaty and his stomach began to ache at the memories of today. Not only was jdope23 a person in his class but he had witnessed Yoongi’s shitdown!

Sugasweet66: That me

Sugasweet66: I the one who crapped his pants

Jdope23: Lmao wut

Sugasweet66: I pooped my pants today in class!! You witnessed me let the floodgates of my a$$ break free

Jdope23: oh

Jdope23: OH

At this moment in time Hoseok was sitting in his dorm room, staring at his computer screen in complete and utter shock. The person he had been playing club penguin with for over 2 years now, sugasweet66, was actually someone he knew in real life. Someone who, not only was in his music theory class, but was his potential soulmate.

To Hoseok it sounded crazy but it all oddly made sense. The reason why Hoseok felt like he was going to shit himself today was because the boy who actually did shit himself in his class was actually his soulmate! He had always had an infatuation with said boy but never was able to get the courage to introduce himself.

Now he had multiple reasons to strike up a conversation.

The fact that sugasweet66 turned out to be the shitty boy in his class, who was also his soulmate, was merely coincidence but Hoseok felt like it was fate. It was fate that the owner of sugasweet66 shat himself in their music theory class, it was fate that the two had become penguin besties on the most amazing online game (and dating website) to ever exist.

Hoseok was overjoyed to say the least.

Jdope23: I think we’re soulmates

Sugasweet66 was temporarily banned from club penguin for using the phrase “what the actual flying fuck you talking about egghead”.

The end?

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spinneryesteryear · 5 years ago

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Spinner plays FFXIV ARR

SPOILERS AHOY (not that anyone cares about ARR in this day and age)

- For my first dungeon, I was a Roegadyn conjurer surrounded by three Lalafell. I’d figured out by that point that players just clip through each other (even if mobs don’t, lol), but I was still kinda worried about stepping on them. They’re like knee-high to me at best.

- - (Conversely, I once ran a guildhest w/3 Roegadames, so there’s that. We commented on how unlikely of an occurrence it was.)

- I admit it, I enjoy walking around as a Roegadame feeling morally superior to all the Miqo’te. And most of the Viera now, tbh.

- one of my favorite things to do quickly became dispensing free heals/raises after a FATE or when running across stray people having difficulty fighting mobs in the wild. People would clap and cheer for me. It’s a great feeling. Made a few friends this way.

-- (I definitely always look to see if that cyclops FATE is up when I pass through the Coerthas Central Highlands so I can go repeatedly raise all the poor noobs dying left and right thanks to that dang 100-Tonze Swing. I usually don’t even bother level-syncing for it. I just stand on the outskirts and raise. And raise. And raise again, haha.)

- I frequently forgot (and still forget) to do the MSQ bc I get sidetracked gathering and crafting. or just doing side quests, no doubt to Fray’s great chagrin

- ground CNJ to 30 to get my unicorn, then figured out I had to unlock actually using mounts via MSQ, so I went off to go fight Ifrit in shame

- I fully admit I picked my GC (Twin Adders) based solely on which company salute I liked best. Also, Gridania was my starter city. Still not sold on the yellow, though

- as a healer, I usually commend my tanks unless they have evinced such stupidity that I do not wish to reward their behavior. If my co-healer has done a fantastic job (not often, sadly), I’ll commend them. If the red mage or summoner raises me or other party members, they get the commend. (This is vanishingly rare, especially for SMN.) If the dragoon outlives the tank by not eating AOE’s, he gets the commend. If the tank is a jerk and the dragoon is perfectly lovely (and probably does a better job tanking the mobs than the blue moron), the latter DEFINITELY gets the commend.

- shout-out to that one red mage on story mode Titan who died almost as much as the rest of us combined (the dragoon defied his stereotype and was just as durable as the tank, ironically enough). It wasn’t even the backflip killing the red mage; it was the avoidable AOE’s. It must be the black mage in them that makes them allergic to dodging.

- the tank for that story mode Titan just said, “LOL,” in chat when we all died, so that has been my inspiration ever since to take wipes with good grace

- Cid was an instant fave from the moment I first met his character. I admit I wanted to kick Alphinaud off the airplane as soon as we recovered it. He was not endearing himself to me, at all.

- didn’t really care for Haurchefant until he came racing into the middle of our fight with that heretical fake inquistitor with the bad facial hair. If a NPC helps me in combat, I automatically like them more.

- the story made me super worried about story mode Garuda, but she went down so fast I almost missed the second phase

- entered Camp Bluefog for the first time into a scene of absolute chaos with like 15 players grinding the lvl-40 FATE’s so I jumped right in alongside them and started throwing stones at ahrimans and coblyns. it was such an exhilarating feeling

- in retrospect, my first Castrum Meridianum run (that left me dead on the floor several times and questioning my skills as a healer) was not really due to me being undergeared but mostly to the tanks not doing THEIR jobs and picking up all the mobs. It was such a chaotic mess that me sitting there and doing nothing, not even healing, so as not to grab aggro was the only way I could survive

- shout-out to that warrior with the plain white shirt and plain white pants glamour on my first Praetorium run who looked like he just woke up, grabbed his axe, and ran off to tank Ultima Weapon in his pajamas. He was also an elezen, I believe, for extra points.

- also shout-out to that guy killing the 2.0 endboss with a magic moogle stick

- look, if you’re not spending your MSQ roulette judging everyone else’s glams and mocking Gaius’s speeches, what are you even doing??? I admit, though, that I mostly grab a book and a cup of coffee for those 5-min cutscenes. I found their story riveting the first time around, but not on the 30th time.

- I actually really liked Urianger even in his ARR outfit? It suited him

---- me playing DFFOO: I don’t care for Thancred

---- me playing FFXIV: *cheers when Thancred comes onscreen*

- Thancred is my son who shall receive less alcohol and more sleep and encouragement and a gunblade and a very nice coat and possibly a pet squirrel. I know he’s my tank now but I feel the urge to take care of him. (And laugh at him when his various angry girlfriends show up again, of course.)

- I would like to thank that tank in my first run of Lost City of Amdapor who gave me a trial by fire in pulling everything wall-to-wall and indirectly teaching me how to manage big pulls (hint: spam Holy)

- not even making, “Pull the lever, Kronk!” jokes in Sastasha Hard can atone for that tank who pulled 12 things w/o warning and kept leaving me to die via aggro’d adds and THEN telling me to bring adds to him. Like, it was advice I needed to hear, but it does no good when zombie fish pirates eat me before I can reach him.

- I might actually rather heal through Aurum Vale again rather than Sastasha Hard

- oddly enough, I’ve had 0% problems tanking Sastasha Hard

- according to the laws of equivalent exchange, however, this means that I have all the problems while tanking in Aurum Vale, between hideously undergeared healers, DPS stealing my morbol fruit on the 2nd boss, lag murdering me via Bad Breath, and general lack of coordination among DPS

- I actually got pretty good at tanking Dzemael Darkhold, though? I finally figured how and where to pull the mobs to get out of the various AOE’s

- I also got pretty good at tanking Cutter’s Cry, between grabbing the adds, avoiding death via cactuar, not stopping on sand traps or geysers, and memorizing the chimera’s attacks. Somehow, I always get morons for DPS and sometimes healer as well in Cutter’s Cry, so it doesn’t count for much. The last time I was there (on WAR), I had to kill the chimera without a healer because they died to the first eyes-glow-purple and I wasn’t about to wipe and start over when they were barely achieving anything anyway. Thank goodness for a rare competent black mage on that run.

- I ran the Odin trial pretty much as soon as it was available (and via DF, too, whoops; I know better now) and we wiped at least 8 times before clearing. 75% of the time I was one of the last 3 or the actual last person standing so clearly I had improved from all the dying left and right I did in my first Castrum Meridianum and Praetorium runs.

---- on that Odin run, my Lalafell co-healer uttered this immortal line in chat: “I am trying my best, though I am but a popoto... now a baked popoto.”

- speaking of which, I trust AST and SCH as my co-healers far more than I do fellow WHM as it seems I’m always raising them. They don’t do party heals when raidwides are going out, waste their mana pre-pulling Medica II, or spam Holy on single-target, unstunnable bosses, smh. As a DPS or tank, though, I trust only AST and WHM. I’m fairly sure 50% of my SCH healers have been asleep at the wheel and Eos was driving.

- shout-out to that one paladin main-tanking Garuda Hard who started emote-slapping Garuda right before she went down. Thanks, man. You gave me a good laugh.

- before seriously settling down to level my crafters and gatherers, I never checked the market board prices before putting stuff up for sale bc I just wanted to clean out my inventory, so there were probably some very disgruntled omnicrafters out there who wanted to lynch me for underselling them

- #1 cause of death: fall damage with mobs aggro’d

--- (special mention to that time I jumped off the higher floating island at Camp Cloudtop, landed below with 1 HP, and was promptly pecked to death by a gastornis. I now kill those stupid birds whenever I see them to avenge my humiliation)

- I feel like there should be job-specific levequests where you go out and do things appropriate to your job, like killing a dragon as a dragoon (before Heavensward, anyway) or cleansing corrupted sprites as WHM or investigating contraband cargo as ACN, etc.

- on that note, I’m probably the only person alive who enjoys the CNJ/WHm quests. I genuinely felt like I was learning magic, and, later on in the 50 - 60 quests, like I was doing what a white mage should.

- players frequently dance while waiting on someone to finish cutscenes, return from AFK, etc. Usually, it’s the Hildibrand or some variant thereof. I... never dance. Except by accident. I just stand there with my arms folded, towering above the rest of the party and looking mildly disapproving.

#spinner plays ffxiv

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