#I WANT TO SEE NORMAL GIRLS IM TIRED OF PRETTY GIRLS I'M GONNA LOSE IT

[the-acid-pear]

Man I wish WLW media was less fucking clean and beautiful I'm so tired of beautiful perfect cinema women I'm gonna start killing

[laboflove]

Oikawa & Iwa X FR

•Aged up•

Word Count- 2363

❗Warnings❗{Smut, angst, praising, infatuation, ridiculing, cheating, body shaming}

A/N: Thicc Y/N who's dating Oikawa and although he says he loves her it doesnt seem that way.

He smiles as he sees your eyebrows pushed together, you were always so cute when you were angry, he just wanted to keep making fun of you to see that face. "Tooru" you suddenly say making his smile fade, "Yeah?" He says confused and your phone buzzes, "Nevermind, I have to go, Iwa is here" you say then kiss his cheek before leaving.

A frown forms on his face as he sees you walk off, you were always hanging out with Iwaizumi. It made him mad because you were HIS girlfriend not Iwaizumi's. He huffs then leaves as well, whatever, hed just make you remember how great it is to date him.

You walk in to find him on your bed and he smiles, "Hey" you both say, you climb onto the bed forgetting about today at work and he pulls you onto his chest. "Did you gain weight? Damn" he says with a chuckle making the thoughts come back, "I think, I'll lose it dont worry" you whisper as you move off and onto the side.

He pulls you close, his hands trailing your body making you anxious, you werent skinny like other girls, you had curves and Oikawa would always tease you about it, middle school to now and you always tried to lose weight but youd gain it back. An endless cycle and honestly the last thing you wanted right now was for him to be touching you like this.

Yet you dont stop him, instead closing your eyes and trying to fall asleep but his hands get more touchy, soon enough spreading your legs. "Not tonight Tooru" and his frown appears again, that's the second time this week you've called him that. "Okay" he says then turns around and you both fall asleep, one angry and confused and the other filled with dark thoughts.

"I just dont understand, shes been calling me Tooru this entire week, why?" He says as he passes the ball to Iwa, "Its your name" He says making him huff. He knew it was his name but you've never called him that before, so why now?!

"I dont like it, she never calls me that so why now? Did I do something wrong?" He says and Iwa stops, "You always make fun of her, im surprised she hasn't dumped you yet" and Oikawa's mouth goes dry. His biggest worry, something he never wants to happen, for you two to break up, you meant everything to him, youd always lift him up, give him pointers and take care of him. You couldn't leave him, you're all he had.

"S-she knows I'm just kidding, I don't mean any of it" he says then the ball flies towards him, "Iwa-!", "It always sounds like you mean it, you tell her shes fat, that shes not pretty enough, that she isnt smart, terrible shit but you never say that you're just kidding. Even then you shouldnt say shit like that to someone who already deals with criticism as it is, you especially shouldn't say it to her because shes your goddam girlfriend" he leaves and Oikawa clenches his fists.

"Hey!" And he looks back, "Do you like her?!" He yells out earning a nod making his blood boil, "I've liked her since middle school, even more in high school and the most right now, but she made the stupidest decision on dating you" and he walks off again.

"Youd never leave me right?" He asks as he rests his head on your chest, you dont answer making him look up with dim eyes, "You would?" He asks and you sigh, "If something were to happen yes but just breaking up with you for no reason would not happen" and he nods. "Um, what would be the reason?" He whispers remembering the conversation with Iwa, "If one of us cheats, I'd never do it but well..." you stop and he looks up at you.

"I-im sorry, I'll never hurt you like that ever again, so please dont leave me" you nod then place a kiss on his head.

He looks back at the tv but hes barely focusing on it, only remembering that night. He was drunk, saying terrible stuff and when he woke up he found you in front of him, sitting down, looking super tired and your eyes were so dry and red. He didnt know why till he looked around and found unfamiliar clothes, women's clothes.

You didnt talk to him about it, none of you brought it up and soon you were both back to normal but he knew that all trust created was gone.

His thoughts are broken by the familiar buzz pattern and you pull the phone to your ear, "Hey" you say with a smile, why cant you smile like that when you talk to him? Why doesnt your voice get all cute and soft with him? Why is it only with Iwa?

"Oh I'm with Oikawa" you say as your hand runs through his hair, he smiles and even more as you rest it on his cheek. "I-iwa" your hand twitches slightly and he can feel your aura change, "Dont call me until your done with that crap, God, you're worse than Oikawa" you put your phone down and he looks up at you.

"What's wrong?" He asks but you shake your head, "Its nothing, just Iwa being a bit of an asshole" he nods and you look at the tv.

"He doesnt love you, he says all that shit which he shouldnt be saying, what if he cheats on you again huh? "

You let out a sigh then close your eyes, uh oh, you're pissed.

"Hey" you hear, turning around you see them and shoot a smile, "Hey guys" you say as you slowly come to a stop. "Whatre you doing here?" One asks, "Oh uh well you know working out" you say and they nod. "Any specific reason? You look perfect already" you laugh making them confused, "Yeah right, if I was Oikawa wouldnt judge me 24/7" you say and they tilt their heads.

"Anyways, I'm gonna get back to this" you say with a small smile and they head to the other side, "Whatre you thinking?" Akaashi asks as Bokuto glares in your direction. "I'm thinking that I want to kill Oikawa", "As much as I'd love to help you do that, its illegal" he says and he huffs. "Only if i get caught".

"Whatre you doing?" He asks as his arms wrap around your waist, you step off and you smile, "Yes" you say and he rubs your stomach, it's not as squishy as before. "I finally lost 15 pounds" you whisper with a large smile and although he should be congratulating you it doesnt make sense. "Whyd you lose weight?" He asks and you look back, "For you, you wanted me to lose it remember?" You say and he looks at you in the mirror.

"I'll love you no matter what", "Haha, yeah right Mr. I want a trophy wife who's beautiful and perfect" you say then move away, his heart clenches hearing you say the words he regrets telling you. He didn't want anyone but you.

"Y-you know I love you right?" He says and you look at him, you dont say anything making his heart break. "I do Tooru, it's just hard to believe" and he looks down, "Okay".

"Y/N" he says for the thousandth time this night, "Are you even listening to me?! It's like you dont care about me! You're always off with Iwaizumi doing God knows what! Why cant you just love me! Only me!" The tears keep falling but you dont look back and you dont let a sob escape. For three days it's been like this, him finding anything to ridicule about and making sure you knew how terrible of a girlfriend you were.

You stand then look at the tree your parents gave you, well it was meant for both of you, something to resemble your love for each other, always growing and alive till death.

A sigh escapes your lips and you walks up to it, "Just as I suspec-", "If I cut this down does that mean were done too?" You ask surprising him. "What does that mean?" He asks and you turn to look at him, "I want to break up" and he looks down. You're crying, you're actually crying, hes never seen you cry, you always refused to look at him whenever you did so hes never got to see it and he wishes he never did.

"Why?", "Why? Why?! Why else Tooru?! Every second I spend with you hurts me! The love in our relationship cant even compare to the amount of pain there is! You give me so much shit and i try to be better, i try to become someone perfect for you but theres always something! I dont love Iwa like I love you! I never have! I only love you but it's like you dont think i do! Even though you're the one that cheated! You're the one that broke the trust! I should've broke up with you before!" You cover your mouth realizing what you just said and you look away.

You were right but why did you say all that stuff to him, he looks at you but quickly looks away. "I'm leaving" you say then rush past him, "W-where are you going?" He asks as he follows you upstairs, you couldn't leave, not like this. He has to say sorry, he has to fix it, he cant lose you!

"I dont know but I cant stay here" you pack stuff up as you avoid his hands, "No" he suddenly says as you reach for the front door. "Bye" you leave in a rush and he looks around, "NO! GET BACK HERE!" and he falls to ground. It actually happened, you left him, you left him and it's his fault, who's going to love him now? Who's going to help him when he gets sick and who's he going to tease?

He leans in as he holds you close, "I love you" he whispers but you stop him, "Its been two months yet you still push me away", "I didnt have sex with Tooru till we were five months in" you say but he doesnt stop, "Oh c'mon, you know you want to so ju-", "Can you stop? I'm really not in the mood for anything like this" you say as you push his hands away from your stomach and thighs.

"Oh I get it" he says as he pins your hands above your head, "You think I'm like Oikawa, that I'll point out your flaws, that I'll think you're ugly, that I dont actually want you" he says into your ear and you look away, he was right and you both knew that. "Well guess what, we all have flaws, I dont think you're ugly and damn do I want you" he kisses you hard but your squirm in his embrace.

"N-no Iwa stop" you let out with a soft moan as he rubs his knee against your clothed heat, "Why? We both want this, you just cant admit it" his tongue trails up your neck as you resist him only making him want you more. "So soft and you always smell so good" he murmurs as you grind against his knee although your mind is saying you dont want this.

"So pretty, especially these moans" desperate whines leave your mouth as he slowly undresses you, "Heh, I think we should take this to the bed" he says as he looks down at your naked body.

Your arms cover yourself as much as they can as he lifts you bridal style, "M-maybe we should wait, i-i should lose a few m-", "Shut the hell up or else I will tie you up" you nod fast and he places you on the bed. "Fuck me" you turn red seeing his eyes take you in, he reaches for his shirt and you move up to help him but he pushes you down making you bounce a bit.

"Stay right there" he undresses as you watch, once hes done he spreads your legs making your body heat up and filling you with so many emotions. "So perfect" he says as he pushes in slowly, you hiss slightly at the feeling you havent felt in such a long time. "Ah- no, Haji-!" He thrusts harder and faster making the frame hit the wall, over and over.

"So warm, so tight and it feels so good" moans leave his mouth making you bite your lip, this felt so different, way too different. "Dont think about him" he says as he thrusts hard sending your eyes wide open, "I-I dont know how he fucked you, or if hes a goddamn sub but dont! Fucking! Think about him!" He growls out with a thrust each time, feeling angry that even now you're still thinking about him. "Sorrysorrysorry!"

Pants leave his mouth as cries leave yours, "God I love you, I love you so much" he mutters as he looks at your pink cheeks and tears falling down your face, he lowers next to your ear as one hand holds your thigh as the other holds your head close to him. "I love the way you just clamp around me" his hips slow down, grinding against you, "I feel like coming every time I thrust into you, that's how good you feel" you tighten around him as the praises keep coming.

Why did this feel so good? Just his words were getting you there and it was so embarrassing that he made you feel this way. "I just cant believe that the woman I've loved since I was 13 is finally mine, that were here together and you're in my arms" he stops to kiss you and you sniffle slightly, "You can come now" a soft cry fills the room as you come and he thrusts a bit more leading to groans and a warm feeling in your core.

"You're mine, only mine".

[their-name-is-morgan]

Ok b so like, I'm gonna try to make this sort of specific, I live for some angst and I live for Abba so like.... Imagine Abba being in one of those days where he just feels like garbage , but then his nice softie s/o visits him and cheers him up and gives him luv bc uwuwuwu. im so awkward at writing this, anyways, it's a scenario if thats ok with u b, and the s/o is a female.

AAAAH B I tried my best to make this turn out decent!! I feel like Leo is extremely OOC and there might be some mistakes here and there, but it’s late and I’m tired...so I’ll fix this in the morning! ;;

I hope you enjoy it anyway, ilysm❤

Il loro segreto

Leone Abbacchio x Fem!Reader❤

Everyone has bad days, and everyone faces them in a different way. There are people like Bruno: he would try his best to help other people overcome their struggles, and seeing their smiling face would make him feel better in an instant. There are people like Fugo: he would allow himself to have a day off, and he’d spend that day doing his favourite things, talking to his favourite people, or even staying alone. And then there are people like Abbacchio.

Leone was a man of few words, he would talk when necessary, and he wasn’t the nicest member of the gang. His face appeared to be in an eternal scowl, with his dark, thin eyebrows furrowed and his lips rarely lifting upwards. One would think that he was a strong, confident man whose only emotions were anger and disgust, but there’s always more to a person than what they let the others see.

Abbacchio was like any other person: some of his days were happy, other ones boring, and other ones bad, upsetting days. On the latter he would isolate himself and even refuse to get out of his bed, too mentally exhausted to interact with other people. He would push them away, and then he’d feel guilty about it. His lips would quiver and his eyes would water, but he’d hold it in.

And that day was one of those days.

(Name) exhaled, her eyes fixed on the last message he had sent: “See you at 9” with a black heart at the end. ‘Edgy’ she thought with a chuckle, but the small smile on her face disappeared as soon as it came. They had agreed on meeting quite early in the morning and, when she noticed that it was pouring outside but his last access remained the same as the previous night’s, she had guessed that the rain wouldn’t have been a problem for him either.

But after an hour of waiting for his arrival in front of the smallest, saddest bookstore in town, she came to a sudden realization: what if something was wrong?

Was he okay? Was the rest of the gang okay? Was her phone being dumb and not showing her his true last messages? She needed to know. She was about to stand up and open her umbrella when she noticed a notification from a different chat: Bruno had just texted her.

‘Would you mind coming over? I know this is sudden, but there’s somebody here who needs you.’ The text read, and her expression twisted into one of concern. It wasn’t the first time that she received a text like that, from either the Capo –whom she considered one of her closest friends- or another one of the guys, and it was not a pleasant thing to read.

She didn’t even bother to reply, instead she started walking towards the Passione residence, which was not that far away from that spot. The rain didn’t stop, making her almost trip at least twice along the way, but she was determined to see her lover’s face and hold him as close as possible.

It didn’t take that long before three knocks on the door snapped Bruno out of his trance; he stood up and made his way to the front door, abandoning the crossword puzzled he had been trying to complete for the past forty minutes on the wooden table.

He slowly opened the door to reveal his friend, umbrella in her right hand and phone in the other, her eyebrows slightly furrowed but a polite smile still present on her face. He motioned to come in and guided her to the couch, where they both sat down;

“So, what happened?” she asked, fidgeting with her hands. He let out a sigh,

“I...will keep it short. You know how Leone can get and now I know he needs extra support that I can’t give him. But please remember, cara; if this is too much for you, if he somehow hurts you with his words or actions...” he paused, cautiously choosing what to say next, “It’s not worth it. He is my friend, but you are too and I wouldn’t want you to think that I agree with everything he says or does.”

She carefully listened, her expression concentrated. She warmly smiled as he finished talking and took his larger hands in hers, grateful for having such a caring and honest friend.

“Bruno, I will follow your advice if anything happens. But I’m pretty sure it won’t,” she reassured him, and he nodded and returned the smile, “Now, he hasn’t left his room has he?”

“He’s been in there since yesterday night. He’d making all of us very worried, (Name).” He confessed, his tone of voice sincere. The girl could only nod and direct her gaze on the flight of stairs leading up to the second floor, where the bedrooms were located.

 Unmade bed, window shut, blankets and dirty clothes lazily piled up in a corner of the barely lit room. The smell not bad enough to be unbearable, but enough to make one’s nose wrinkle. The pitter patter of the rain soothed him, but unnerved him at the same time. Was it even possible to feel in such a way?

He sat there, intently staring at the blank, boring wall as if it was the most interesting thing. What else could he have done in his state after all? With his headphones too far away to reach and the overwhelming fatigue that didn’t seem willing to leave him anytime soon, he could only lose heart and sit there, with his back against the bed’s headboard.

His almost lifeless gaze fell upon his phone, which had been resting on his nightstand since the previous night. A feeling of guilt struck him at the thought that he hadn’t shown up for his and (Name)’s date, his chest tightening and a lump forming in his throat. No, he couldn’t cry. What was the point of crying anyway? His eyes alarmingly watered, salty tears threatening to roll down his pale cheeks; he tried to focus on breathing, when a soft, almost inaudible knock made his grip on the thin blanket covering his legs tighten and his eyebrows furrow.

No. He thought, his heart beating faster. Fuck, leave.

Silence. But then, another knock, this time a little bit louder. Who was it, and what did they want? He had harshly declined Bruno’s help earlier that morning, and made it clear that he didn’t want any of the other guys around. Watching Bruno retrieve his hand at his commanding voice made him regret his actions, but then again. What was he expecting from himself?

With his gaze fixed on the door, he flinched when he heard the voice of the person behind it.

“Leo?”

I don’t deserve you. He thought once again, his eyes burning. He suddenly became aware of the state he was in, with his normally silky hair now messy and tangled, tied in a low ponytail, no sign of makeup on his ghost white face, and his embarrassing attire composed by an old, short sleeved shirt –obviously too large for him- and a pair of grey night shorts, his legs exposed and, much to his regret, hairy.

“Leone, I just want to know if you’re okay-“

“I am, now leave.” Please, he wanted to add, before I say something I’ll regret.

He could feel her sighing, trying to come up with something to tell him that could’ve comforted him. But what exactly could’ve possibly made him happier? He had tried to think of something, to do something, but it only ended up hurting him more, making him lay back down, exhausted and ashamed of himself. Just the thought of it made him stomach turn, the thought of his beloved waiting for him under the pouring rain whilst he was laying in bed, frustrated... melancholic.

“Please tell me if there’s something I can do to make you feel better. I know you’re lying, but it’s okay,” a pause. Then shuffling, and the doorknob moved a little, “Can I come in, Tesoro?” she asked. Little did she know that the man was trying his hardest not to break down there, in that exact moment. Or did she? She’d never seen him or talked to him while he was in such a state, usually he would be angry and frustrated, drinking his pain away in the kitchen in the middle of the night, or even in a bar.

Silence means consent, she thought –as much as that sentence could’ve been wrong-, and she dared to open the door, moderately illuminating the chaotic room. He froze, not really sure what to do, if to yell at them or to gather all his strength to stand up and lock the door completely. But he simply stayed still, his chest rising and falling with every shaky breath he took.

“What are you doing here,” he asked, his words ended up sounding more like a statement, though. She slowly stepped inside, her gaze falling upon her handsome boyfriend’s body, partially covered by a thin, cream coloured blanket.

“I’m here to listen to you, what’s going on Leone?” she asked, slowly stepping closer to his bed. He eyed her for a moment, his eyes softening. He wanted to be mad and make her leave, he really did, she wasn’t supposed to see him like this and he deserved to suffer alone. He deserved to listen to all the horrible thoughts that his mind was full of, obsess over them.

He gasped at the light touch of her hand, which was now softly holding his, his long, bony fingers subconsciously intertwining with hers. That simple touch sent a wave of butterflies through his veins, making him shake and choke back a sob.

(Name) promptly took notice of this and sat down beside him, her eyes kind and a warm, welcoming smile on her face.

“You can cry, it’s okay to. Please look at me,” and he did, with tears finally spilling down his face, his cheeks flushed and the muscles of his chin trembling, making his lips quiver. His right hand clutched at hers as if his life depended on it, while his left was clenched in a fist, the knuckles slowly going white. (Name) worriedly moved closer to him, letting her free hand wander behind his head to untie his hair and run her fingers through it.

Tell me everything.

“I am... I don’t know. Fuck, I don’t deserve you-“ a stifled sob, and then he sharply inhaled, “You were waiting for me, but I was here. Being a useless dick even if they wanted to help. I just...” he suddenly stopped, allowing smaller sobs to escape from his parted, soft lips. The girl moved her hand from his hair to his back, pulling him closer so that his head could rest on her shoulder.

Slightly embarrassed by this position as she was the one usually laying her head on his shoulder, he tried to pull away, but her soothing touch and whispers sent a shiver up his spine and made him hold onto her for dear life, weeping and babbling about how he didn’t deserve her, about how he would miss her though if she left, and she thought she heard him say I’m sorry once or twice –and he’d rarely apologize-.

(Name) held him tight, noticing how quiet he was even while shaking and sobbing almost uncontrollably, wetting her cute, slightly elegant shirt. Not that she cared anyway, he was much more important than a stupid shirt.  

“Leo,” she whispered at some point, making him blink, more tears rolling down his reddened cheeks, “You deserve so much and you don’t even realize it. I know you blame yourself for a lot of things...” he raised his head, his hair gracefully cascading down his back; their eyes met and (Name) gave him a small smile, which he returned, “But not everything’s your fault.”

He averted his gaze, his breath slowly calming and his shoulders relaxing.

“Hm. Just promise... this whole thing will stay between us,”

She chuckled, and shifted in a more comfortable position so that they could be even closer.

“Of course; now will you eat breakfast with me?”

[inlove-with-myhubbies]

Kay! Im so bored. I'm just gonna do all the qns.

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? Yeah, I'm pretty sure Hiroki loves me~ 2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? Why would I not date someone my age? Hahah 3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time? When I was playing the main story? 4. Would you ever smile at a stranger? I would prefer not to. 5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? Dunno. 6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? Yep~ 7. What exactly are you wearing right now? A tank top? 8. How often do you listen to music? Everyday~ 9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? Jeans~ 10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2018? Probably not~ 11. Are you a social or an antisocial person? Antisocial lol... 12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? Aigonorus~ Aoi~ Asahi~ Aslan~ 13. What about ‘R’? Ryo~ Rhion~ Ritsuto~ Rikiya~ Ryoji~ 14. Can you drive a stick shift? No. 15. Do you care if people talk badly about you? Depends~ 16. Are you going out of town soon? Nope. 17. When was the last time you cried? When I broke my nail the other day? It hurts. 18. Have you ever told someone you loved them? Yes. I tell Scorpio I love him everyday. 19. If you could change your eye color, would you? No. 20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for? SCORPIO~~~ 21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having. Nope. 22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead? Yeah~ 23. Are you dating the last person you talked to? Hiroki? Yeah. 24. What are you sitting on right now? My bed? No, I'm not gonna say Scorpio's lap. Fuck! My phone just decided to slap my face. 😓😓 Nvm, let's continue. 25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? My family doesn't tell me that. We don't even talk or anything lololololol... But yeahhh, my fictional hubbies always tell me how much they love me~ How? Pick a story to replay, then play the story lololol... 26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? Yes. I want Partheno, Tauxolouve, Tsugumi, Kohaku, Motai and many moreee... yes! I want Coach Motai!!! 27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night? Hiroki~ 28. Do you get a lot of colds? Not really~ I wear cardigans or hoodies~ 29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from? Dunno. 30. Does anyone hate you? Probably... I guess so. 31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? Nope. 32. Do you like watching scary movies? Yep. But I'm scared... So I NEVER watch horror movies alone... 33. Do you want your tongue pierced? No. 34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? The year when I'm born? 1998? 35. Did you have a dream last night? I don't think so lol... but I remember the last time I had a dream... I dreamt of some stuffs I don't wanna remember lol... what an irony hahah... I remembered how I was tied up and... errr let's just say... attacked... 36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? Almost an hour ago? To my fictional hubby~ 37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? To my fictional hubby? Yeah sure. 38. Do you think someone has feelings for you? Probably my fictional hubby? RL? Dunno lol 39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? You? Well, you just spent 5 mins of your life reading this... 40. Did you have a good day yesterday? Dunno... isn't it just a normal day? 41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship? Yes. With my fictional hubbies~ 42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl? Nope~ 43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Yessss~ I never ever ever ever wanna lose my fictional hubbies toooo~ RL? Nahhhh neverrr! 44. What’s the best part about school? Dunno~ 45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? Yeah, i guess~ 46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school? I did. 47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head? Hell yeah! 48. Were you single over the last summer? RL? Yes. FICTIONAL WORLD? NEVER! 49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago? What was it like 2 years ago? I don't remember lol.... 50. What are you supposed to be doing right now? Nothing. 51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with? Nope. 52. Are you nice to everyone? Not really. 53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? Yes. But I still love my fictional hubbies! 54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? I will NOT cheat on my dumb boyfie, that is if I ever have one... Let's just talk about my parents... My mum has a boyfie, my dad has a (?) girlfriend, and lots of stuffs happened... that's why they divorced... ermmm how many years ago? I can't remember... I think... 5? Or 6? Or dunno lah... But the point is, I don't like cheating. 55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? Feelings on how much I love Yurio? Nooooo~ He is just so precious. 56. Do you think you like someone? Scorpio! 57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? Nope~ I think dun have lolol... 58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? I'm fine with both. 59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? Can I not answer this qn? Haizzz fine. Few years ago, when I was in class, I had a relapse. A huge relapse. Hmmm... let's just say, when it stopped, I burst into tears... and... it was not pretty. Yeah. I pity my future boyfie, if I will ever have one. He will probably have to deal with my bullshit... and my split personality... and my relapses... and... errr... let's just say some other stuffs. 60. Do you hate anyone? Nope. No need to hesitate lol. Answer is straightaway no. It's tiring lol... very tiring... 61. How’s your heart? Broken into pieces? Lololol waiting for Dr. Saeyoung Choi to stitch it back into one piece for me. Jk. 62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? Yes. However, even though I hate it, I don't mind talking about it. That's if the listener PROMISES NOT TO SHIT TALK ABOUT IT LATER. 63. Have you ever cried over a guy? Over a fictional character? Yeaahhh 64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? Dunno. 65. Are your toenails painted pink? No. 66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? How would I know? Lolol 67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? Ermmm... I would like it if my boyfie trusts me enough to do that... 68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? No. 69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? My fren? 70. How do you look right now? Messy as always? 71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? In real life? No. 72. Can you commit to one person? RL? Yeah. I would never cheat on my boyfie. Fictional world? Haizzz... Please do not remind me. 73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? No. 74. Have you ever felt replaced? Yes. 75. Did you wake up cranky? Sometimes lolol 76. Are you a jealous person? Probably sometimes~ 77. Are relationships ever worth it? Dunno... If he's the one, yeah sure. 78. Anyone you’re giving up on? Nope, except for myself. 79. Currently wanting to see anyone? ...yes Who? ... ... ... The unluckiest god is? SCORPIO!!! 80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? Breathe. 81. Last person you cried in front of? My freaking idiotic brother. Cux that asshole broke my freaking nail. He's a hugeee jerk! 82. Is there someone you will never forget? Yeah. 83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? Yeah. Scorpio always protects me. 84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? Hug him. Kiss him. Love him. HE NEEDS MORE LOVE. 85. Are you over your past? No. I have no idea how to get over it either. There are just so many things that remind me of it. 86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? Yes. 87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? Nope~~~ 88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? He wouldn't. 89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? Yes. Why would I not let Hiroki in? 90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? Can't remember lolol 91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? With a new fictional character? Yeahhhh! With a guy in real life? I don't know. Probably not. I would probably still be doing nothing everyday. 92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? Yeah. 93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? No. 94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going? Yes, with my fictional hubbies. AND YES! It's awesome! 95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? Yes. 96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? I guess he's fine. 97. Who do you have texts from? Frens? 98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? I wish them all the best? And then I will probably cry? Cux my fictional hubbies left me? 99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? Yes. 100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? My hubbies, duh 101. Ever kissed under fireworks? No. 102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? I even see stars lolol...

[ts-nightingaleislands]

Episode #4- “if I have to do another tribal I'm gonna tonya Harding these bitches”- Austin

I have not gotten a chance to see tribal's entirety, but something did stand out. Tawni essentially implied that OG Thrush would stick together and do what it takes and it told me that perhaps there are people on that tribe unwilling to work with Petrel. I understand that we have our OG tribe but I will say that people who arent open to working with others may not be good for the long run so I think Im gonna try and evaluate a few things and go from there as far as maximizing my benefits

The Dylan blindside went very well. I would have very much preferred to see Tawni leave, only because she's still the person I've talked to least. Unfortunately, Cheatham and Austin both wanted her to stay, which is why we voted Dylan, who was a much more aggressive player than Amy. I figure that it's early on, a swap could come any day now, so I've been preparing for one. I've already tried to get a Tawni vote prepared in the event we lose, which was actually very easy because she told me she wanted to get rid of Noah and that's all he needed to be good with it. (It also helps that he was independently considering voting Tawni before I told him that). Cheatham and Austin would likely prefer to vote Amy, which I would not prefer. Amy is much less likely to betray me than Tawni as far as I can tell, and the absolute worst case scenario regarding a swap would make Amy an easy scapegoat vote if we lose. Tawni would be much harder to vote out in that scenario. Premerge is all about making strong connections to carry me through the rest of the game, just laying my foundation now. Austin and Noah both trust me so much, and then Cheatham appears to be seen as a fourth wheel to our alliance. Austin and Noah (especially Noah) are huge players, so if you're going to take a shot at my alliance, it would make more sense to get one of them, and Cheatham has already been seen to get votes on him due to certain aspects of how he comes off (blatantly refusing to work with people afaik?). I'm not the big guy in my alliance, but I'm not the expendable guy either. Right where I'd want to be. Assuming I can actually form strong social connections with everyone, and let's be honest, that's 50/50. Oh no do I need to take control of the game strategically to have a shot at winning?? Well if I do, the bigmovez part of my brain will have to wait until we merged, because I have already established that the premerge is a time for fostering strong connections!

Well that went according to plan and Dylan went home! Now it’s once i get tawni out (who was also against me) , i’ll get my idol! That really all i care about tbh so i have some safety come swap. Noah and I are THROWING this comp just to send home tawni and get ourselves an IDOL

So I have to pretty much start a majority alliance later though right now I am more focused on the challenge. As of this moment, I like the idea sharing going around for the challenge. Baby Got Back may be questionable to some but we just want to have fun! Im ready to get this going and just have a fun challenge with hopefully another win!

Im nervous sorta in that last time I had to edit the music video and it was ao stressful knowing if we lost it would be my fault. It does sorta deem AnnMarie is running into trouble so I might have to do it again unfortunately and its like ahhh

Pleaseeeeee have a tribe swap soon . I love my tribe but if I have to do another tribal I'm gonna tonya Harding these bitches .

Last night felt like a mess. Rizo joins a chat with Kyle and Tim supposedly to get info from and the belief is they may want to target one of us, meanwhile Gwen makes a chat with me and Sara calling it Detectives where we end up voicing concerns and sure enough Rizo and Tim's history is brought up. The girls and AnnMarie get sketched out from Tim and by association Kyle, Steven meanwhile is gaining cool points like Santa Claus and yeah. Im pretty certain its only a matter of time before peoppe search stuff about me but man this tribe is becoming a secret ball of chaos

And Liam is an unproblematic cool kid too

Well. I cried myself to sleep. And I woke up crying. I want to give up so bad. Cause it’s like at this point I have zero chance of winning so what’s the point. I don’t know anyone on the other side. My one ally in the game sucks ass. Granted my entire tribe does. And it’s like I’m assuming at this point we aren’t swapping and y’all are gonna keep us here until merge except there will be no one from my tribe left to merge. I’m just so fucking tired of trying

Wow, I can’t believe we won again. And in a landslide. It was a lot of fun making that video. And yes, that is a real snake. And no, I had never touched a snake before. And yes, it was weird. Okay, so here’s what went down over the past few days. Rizo told the CORGIS that Tim wanted to make an alliance with him and Kyle. I don’t know if that actually came to fruition yet, but after doing some digging, Chris found out that both Kyle and Rizo work for FedEx. Even though they live in different states, they may have bonded over this, or maybe they met at some point? No idea. Anyway, we are keeping our eyes out. This prompted Chris, Sara, and I to make a new sub-alliance called Detectives. We discussed the possibility of Rizo going rogue and we also discussed concerns about Tim. I did some research online and found Rizo’s Survivor audition video on Youtube. I think he may be a little more of a game player than we initially thought, but I mean, a lot of people in these ORGs apply for the actual shows. But it did make me and Sara question our Sunt alliance with him. I also did some digging on Tim and found out that he has played in a lot of ORGs and he has won, or done well, in a significant number of them. Reading reviews from his past competitors makes me even more nervous about him. They said that he was really great at game play and basically slayed the social game. He is way too much of a threat and we need him out of this game before he can manipulate people. And this makes sense with Tim’s Devils…I realized that he could have just told the whole tribe about the concerns with Noah, but he decided to just tell the girls. Now, sure, maybe this was out of the kindness of his heart, but based on the information that I found, I think that it was a strategic move to gain trust with us. Oh, and also, I accidentally almost blew up that alliance…we were talking about alliances and he said he was only in one alliance. However, I know that he has approached at least two other people with the possibilities of alliances, so I highly doubt that is true. Anyway, I mentioned it in the Detectives and Chris was like oh he has an alliance? But Sara and I saved it (I hope) by telling him that he was probably talking about the chat he made with the girls since the hosts technically had to call that an alliance. I think we’re good? I’m debating whether we tell Chris the name. Tim’s Devils is a total joke and none of the girls are actually loyal to it, but I don’t want the name coming back to Chris. He is still my #1 and I want him to be able to trust me. It was funny because when I was talking to Tim, he said we have a good alliance and I was like Tim’s Devils? And he asked how many alliances I was in. I was like ohhh I didn’t realize that was a real alliance because no one has talked in it. Then tried to cover it up with asking whether it is normal for people to make alliances before losing a challenge. Who knows if he bought it. I’m just going to keep playing up the N00B card for now. So everyone that I have talked to has said they are concerned about Tim. He is my target. So this could go two ways – either everyone really wants Tim out, or they really want me out and that’s the name they are giving me. I hope it’s the former, but either way it has been fun! If it is the latter, it was a great learning experience! It’s kind of hard to say what the next move is, since we don’t know if there will be a swap…and if there is a swap, who would be on my tribe. Ideally, we would have the majority in both tribes. I guess the most likely groups are 5v2 and 4v3. My only concern is that the other tribe might have the immunity idol. In that case, we wouldn’t be able to split votes in the 4v3 tribe. We could in the 5v2 tribe…I guess we will have to see when we switch tribes!

I just wanted to touch base cause I think theres a tribe swap. I also formed a pseudo alliance with kyle and rizo just in case we ever lose to make sure i have the numbers with the Tim's Devils alliance.

I'm in a bit of a peculiar position. Two people on my tribe, Noah and Austin, both appear to want to have me as their number one, both positioning themselves in such a way that it would be advantageous for me to side with them. If this is true, then I am probably in the best spot on this tribe, and I control the vote. Do I side with Noah and vote Tawni, who is much more likely to ditch me in a swap than Amy? Do I side with Austin and vote Amy, which would complete Austin's list and give us control of the idols? Do I vote Cheatham, because I've gone mad with power and it's theoretically possible? So many possibilities! However, the best one in my opinion is to vote Tawni out for two reasons: 1. She popped off at the challenge. Not like "oh no what a physical threat vote her out before she goes on an immunity run". But it's obvious that she put so much effort into the challenge, that even Petrel would recognize that. So if she's voted out, it's clear to everyone that the Thrush tribe may be a bit of a mess. And if we're so disjointed, in the event of a swap, we aren't a coalition worth toppling over. We're numbers they can use to fulfill their own objectives. 2. She never talks to me. Amy never talks to me, but she never talks to anyone. Tawni talks all the time to other people (or so I've heard). Voting her out reduces the number of options other people (Austin) have, forcing them to stick with me or jump into the unknown that is Petrel. I really hope this is the best move, and if I get 14th bc I'm swapfucked then >:( (i guess thats not as bad as a blindside tonight)

Wohooo “we won another challenge this is so great!” I must say I am impressed at how well my tribe is doing and it’s great I’m safe and practically made the merge. However how can I go to a merge and not know who to trust. I trust my corgi alliance and Kyle but Honeslty they haven’t been tested yet to see if they are loyal which is scary. Another calm round where I can’t go into the immunity pool or target someone in my tribe. I’m anticipating a tribe swap, I don’t really want one because if I get tribe swapped I’ll be upset but at this point I’m ready to get some gameplay going and hopefully Chris and myself or Gwen can get this game going.

Shit hit the fan I’ve got a great ally in Sara who filled me in on a lot about our tribe and the other tribe. We work really well together. Turns out there’s a 6 person alliance of Gwen Sara rizo Liam Chris and AnnMarie. Sara felt on the bottom, so she talked to me. She is in an alliance chat with me AnnMarie and Kyle. This alliance of six is supposedly falling apart though. This leaves Tim. He talked to me after my reward challenge win, and he seemed somewhat insecure about his place. He’s pretty much on the bottom. Me and Sara agree that he could be an easy target to keep our place in the game if we lose soon, or if there’s an unfavorable swap. Noah seems to be on the bottom of the other tribe, so that could help us in a swap as well. Tribal happens soon and I’m pretty nervous, not necessarily for what happened at tribal, but what might come after

This entire round has been a mood and I'm extra upsetty spaghetti that I wasn't around more to hassle people! Honestly, I'm just counting the days before I get caught for my shenanigans! I literally spilled the entire idea of the 6 person alliance (as well as other groups) to Steven this round because well, it's full of duos and I'm not any of their priority. Plus, I'm generally not an underdog in games, but I love working with the underdogs and I sorta see Steven as that. If he leaks all I told him, I'm probably screwed...but I think he trusts me because he was willing to pass info and strategize with me too. Lastly, Gwen and Chris are totally a duo and Tim is sketchy...that's all! :)

well, i lost my closest ally dylan so now im feeling pretty alone. i think i could be going this round but some people are telling me to vote tawni so im going to do that and hope it works. wish me luck!

Sooooo I just edited the entirety of the lip sync challenge and it was super fun to watch everyone dance and mess around with the lyrics. I wasn't in love with the song, but I gotta admit that the end result was really nice. Gwen helped out a ton by making a Google docs and organizing things. I'm super disappointed with the other tribe though. It had little effort, and Trent really tore into them. Trent also said that the horn girl had him cracking up. I'm the horn girl. I was very happy. I was told some very interesting stuff about Tim. I already had a pretty bad vibe from him, but I guess Gwen confirmed my inkling. I don't think I will be aligning myself with him during the game.

4 votes Tawni, 2 votes Amy.

[survivor-guyana]

Episode 4: "I'm pan with a plan, and I'm here to make messy ass moves." - Maynor

So... Dog food is salty as fuck. No wonder my dog downs the whole bowl of water after he's done eating... What the hell dog food makers

SO THIS WHOLE dare challenge this has got me GOING right now. The whole impersonations and "Who will Win?" videos are going to be BIG indicators of who is close to from my tribe. BUT DEVON.... TOOK IT TO A WHOLE NOTHER' LEVEL. A NORMAL person would do a silly one y'know? Does this guy NOT do Sarah (someone I know he's close with) and state all these things he obviously knows about her. She goes to Michigan state, has a finsta, likes to make friends in games... etc. THEN THE PICK TO WIN VIDEO.... AGAIN A NORMAL PERSON WOULD DO SOMETHING SILLY. For example: I did JD and went on about how she is CANADIAN. DEVON GOES AND DOES: Jose and how he could be tricking us... and it's actually his strategy. I can not with this being anymore. BUT tbh I'm just GLAD he's making himself a bigger target than me in case we lose. ALSO: Chelsea showing that she knows stuff about Alyssa... ummmm NO. I'm scurrrred. As say they say in French I am "le fucked" here. TBH i'm NOT lying when I say I wasn't close to my old tribe. I literally was only close to Aidan but aside from that no one else. There was an alliance of Sarah/Aidan/Devon inside of the alliance of Dani/Maynor/Sarah/Aidan/Devon/ myself. It is driving me BONKERS that Devon (the one person I NEED on my tribe right now) is unintentionally and potentially fucking his game with his videos. This was avoidable imo. Johnny didn't say "you MUST put a target on your back"... THIS IS THE GUY I NEED TO STAY WITH ME. ALSO if I ever find out Alyssa is playing me I might cry. She's literally my bitch. She's awesome. I NEVER GET ALONG WITH GIRLS IN GAMES. EVER. I just know Sammy/Chelsea are close. I could see Alyssa being close to them too so I'm just trying to make myself as relevant as possible with Alyssa because if I don't she won't feel bad sending me out. If she has doubts about it I CAN WORK WITH THAT. Sammy is totally the glue between the faves on my tribe IMO. I just know I need to somehow get closer to Sammy. I just don't know HOW! Chelsea seems super quiet and it's hard to really get a read on her. I just hope we never have to lose because I will actually cry if José pops up with an idol and my ass gets sent packing.

So me and Jones have gotten closer and closer!!! So has me Jones and Nick as an alliance. The challenge went pretty ok but we eventually lost in the end. There's a joint tribal happening right now so we're all a little shook. The Green team is thinking of a way to stay safe through it all. The other tribe seems like it has some pretty nice peeps on it honestly lol. I watched their intro videos and Danielle's stands out the most. (I think she's the pizza one lol). The Green Team was originally going to try and get Jenna to flip back with us but we're not sure if she even values us so now we're going to try and flip with the fans and somehow vote Jenna out.

First of, can i say that i missed jones and tim. 😭❤️ Like im so happy i finally got to talk to them. I missed my DAD Jones. We have a duo alliance going on. I brought it up right when the joint chat was made. Its going to be great. As for the vote tonight. We are going to target Nick. And hope that Jenna stays with us.

HNNNNN Jenna isn't going to flip on the fans to my knowledge which really fucks over a lot of things. Now I'm not sure if I'm gonna be targeted or Jones or Nick. TJ and JD can go home and I'll be fine but I'd hate to get out right now. In my head I'm like UGH JENNA JUST FLIP BACK TO FAVS you'll be in a good spot and won't jeopardize anything!!! And you'll almost surely guarantee Jury!!!! But on the outside Im like.. omg ya fans vs favs is over the swap did that snatched wig tea okurrt PEriod. I just wanted a simple tribal but now I'm losing my shit. If I go after Nikias I will JUMP.

Honestly my allies bore me. I guess I trust them but I don't know... this other tribe seems to suck too. I just want a favorite to leave at this point because the fans are getting slaughtered. But Thomas is an interesting situation. We definitely have a past and he's the biggest threat but the devil you know is better than the devil you don't? But I know he'll pick Jess over me any day of the week I've been a little quieter so I predict people might have doubts but I'm loyal to my alliance for now. I'm just trying to lay low and make it to the merge before I can really be a crazy cunt. Nick is apparently the vote and I'm sad because he's also a minority? But not too sad because idk him.

updates: Maynor, Mitchell, Tim and I make an alliance maybe possibly? also,, we're probs gonna surrender to the fans lmao sorry JD :(

I think nicks going home but I’m kinda nervous. Jenna’s sticking with us fans apparently. Jonesy wants jenna out that’s all the tea I have

I was prepared to flip when they brought up Jones’ name. Like nah. I would lay down my game for Jones aka Dad. For this vote cuz i think theres a swap coming after this vote. Hopefully. It looks like its Nick tonight which i am fine with.

(i don't have the time/energy to film a video confessional) THEY'RE REALLY GOING FOR ME HUH MITCHELL THAT FUCKING RAT threw my name out to the rest of the fans because I suggested Jenna, and now they wanna vote me out (the only reason why I know is bc my king maynor told me) Maynor said he'd try to switch the vote, but right now, it's on me, and that's NOT OKAY HAHAHA. if it stays on me, then he's gonna flip. it's so INTERESTING how all I do is suggest someone who's a CLEAR MINORITY ON THE OTHER TRIBE to be voted out!! and then SUDDENLY some fake vague ass people wanna cherish her???? like suddenly she's the token person on the tribe??? that's fake as fuck and they know that. ok while i'm writing this,,, apparently the vote went off me. but it's also all up to JENNA like ARE YOU KIDDING. like,, y'all are a group of 5 people, you can come up with a decision on your own and she can go with it. like she's really chill, I like her I think she's cool, but she shouldn't be getting this treatment from a tribe that had her on the bottom before. i'm at a point where i'm just trying to get Maynor to flip to our side, because h's just as frustrated about this situation as I am. and I don't really want Nick to will me/tim his idol if we can get him to flip. ,,, so yeah *does fake ass stick out tongue thing*

This vote is a MESS. At one point it was Jones and then its JD and now its TJ and now I want to JUMP from a cliff. Also Nick is two faced. Apparently he had an idol hunt group composed of Alyssa, JD, Whats her face, and Himself. He probably used MY idol clue and I want to fite him.

Hi I’ve been very tired owo so I come out of nowhere and honestly I’m like, this is cute owo so now I’m just going to come out of nowhere when we swap, and honestly that’s cute :,)

so according to Maynor it's between Jenna and Nick, i'm still trying to work my magic on Maynor, and I think it's working. hopefully a swap is coming sometime soon though so i can kick Mitchell's ass laksdjflsdkj

I can't imagine being in a better position in this game. Think about it:

1. I got almost everyone's trust from the fans tribe. 2. I got swapfucked alongside Jess, who I barely spoke to prior. 3. I got connected with Jess and solidified a relationship. 4. I made connections with Sammy, Alyssa, Chelsea, and Jose. 5. We haven't lost a single competition, and now the other 2 tribes will be pitted against one another. Whoever votes in the minority will be forced to come to Jess and I, so in essence, we hold every ounce of power. Best case scenario: We get swapped into a tribe with current Hosororo and old fans, giving me the ability to pick and choose who stays and who goes. Worst case scenario: We get swapfucked and I need to make new relationships with alternative favorites. I would also be more than fine staying in the same tribe, considering there is a clear gap between our tribe and the other 2.

Our tribe really thought Jenna was the swing vote. Bish it was actually me. Im pan with a plan and im here to make messy as moves. Jones aka DAD. ❤️ I think im going to flip and do Jenna. While my fans + jenna are doing Nick. Im really hoping there is a swap cuz if there isnt im screwed. But its a move and me and Jonesy are going to be the villians of the season. But at the end of the day. A favorite is still going home.

Me and Jones went on call for an hour and talked about the vote. We're sticking with voting Jenna out. Jonesy worked her magic on Maynor and is getting him to flip. Also Mitchell is a bad bean akdjdjs. Anyways ... Me and My wig have decided to vote ... for Jenna Nick wanted me to play the idol on him since he's getting votes this round and Maynor may not flio but HNNNNN i dont want that target on me just as of now. It'd be too risky and since he made an idol hunt group without me on our OG tribe... I considered letting him will me the idol and then him getting voted out ajsjsksks.

Well, there's no way of getting this to work unless Jones works her magic. I'm simply trying to get people to realize that I'm social and understanding of how this game gets played. Hopefully I can get people to want to keep me and play with me come a tribe swap or a merge.

It’s been a weird round.  I fought my ass off in the challenge but to no avail.  This joint tribal has been a battle.  I think Maynor is flipping to vote out Jenna.  If I’m wrong it’s me with an idol in my pocket. But my allies Tim and Jonesy both feel confident in Maynor and you can’t win Survivor alone so I’m going to stick with my homies and not play my idol.  Gulp.  Wish me luck:

Curse you hosts! Throwing us into a blender to vote someone out! RTQ-read the question, or so my professor always said. What do I do not not read the whole thing and forget to put a Guyana sign or even say it In my videos. Which leaves me scrabbling to do it all again. Dog food and fucking hot sauce bullshit is not something you want to do twice in one night, let alone in one week. Lesson for the day? READ THR MOTHER FUCKING QUESTION FOLKS!

YALL I am so sorry about not making confessionals. It's just I always have a fear that I am wasting my time and that the confessionals won't even got posted...and like nothing interesting has happened on my tribe.  Here are some fun facts tho: after tonight me, Alyssa, José, and Chelsea are the only ones that have not gone to tribal. YEEHAW SKEET SKEET YALL.  I am living in paradise, I have connected w Devon and Jess pretty well.  Devon I know I can trust 100%, I am sure that Jess and Alyssa are pretty close but I still trust them too. I want to be reunited with JONESSSS I miss her.  CRYING IN THE CLUB RN.  We had a mini tribe call just to like chit chat and that was fun.  Jess also destroyed the comp and if José would not have been on our tribe I would have asked to sit out bc like I was still recovering from editing the music video. UMM what else. Oh we have that lit joint tribal that we do not have to go to #BLESS and Idk yall I am just waiting to go to tribal so I can play the game, it's hard coming up with stuff to do and have fun when u winnn.  I have just been collecting tea about the fans sooo

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO WORK OUT OH MY GOD BLESS MAYNOR HOLY FUCK I LOVE THAT MAN SO MUCH that's all for now xoxo, i'll do a more detailed video confessional later

Not even going to lie.. I'm shitting bricks that José is going to fuck up this challenge for us. If he does RIP me in this game. I think I'm the one on the outs out of the 5 of us. Devon is connected with people like Chelsea who won't even give me the time of day.. I'm fucked. SO FUCKED.

Lets start off with Jenna.  I am very sorry. Im sorry that i voted for you. Im a sorry that i made the move? No. I felt you were too close to Dani and Sarah and Aidan and Mitchell. And you had lots of power that tribal. I guess you can say you were sarah and i was kass in this vote. And chaos struck. No one knew my connection to my dad aka Jones and Tim. They are ❤️. I would protect them and i did. Am i ready for the fall out idk. Hopefully no one takes the temptation on our tribe cuz my ass will go right behind Jenna. If I cant do damage control.

Welcome to my: "I Think I may Just be PMSING" rant for this round. BUT I JUST NEED A FUCKING PERSON IN THIS GAME. Someone who I know has my back at least 75%. I'm not asking for a miracle here.. I know someone having your back 100% isn't realistic at all. However, I just need someone who I know going forward will pick me over their old friends or tribe-mates if when we swap or if I make it to merge. Where is this all coming from? I have no idea. I just have a fucking weird feeling. I felt good with my tribe but for some reason something just feels OFF to me. This is probably my paranoia kicking in or my hormones? Only time will fucking tell.... If you'd ask me currently who I considered my person I would say it's Devon by fucking default.  WHICH IS REALLY SAD CONSIDERING HOW WE WERE PRE-SWAP. We swapped together, he has ACTUALLY given me information. BUT..... I know homeboy is looking out for himself first and will sell me out when time comes. SO that's not good for me in the future... I know he has a tendency to tell people the same things too so.. that’s a mood. I would have said Alyssa is my person HOWEVER, I don't see a scenario where she chooses me over Chelsea or Sammy on this tribe right now. In the future? Possibly, I won't rule that out at all.  But for the remainder of however long we have on this tribe... I don't feel good at all. She gives me almost no information and that could be a result of me not giving her information but I’ve honestly told her everything I know. Mitchell possibly being on the bottom, what went into the Lucy/Bee vote. That’s all I got. I physically can not give her anything else. SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING I KNOW. Maybe she doesn’t know anything? I have no fucking idea. I want to work with her SO BAD. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to work with SOMEONE MORE IN A GAME. BUT I fucking can’t shake the feeling of her stabbing me in the back if it came down to me or Devon. I'm trying not to let my paranoia show and I know I've let it slip a couple of times in conversations with Alssya/ Sammy. They ignored me for a good 20 minutes when I said it so it was obvious they were on a call or communicating someway. OR MAYBE IT’S MY PMS OR PARANOIA?!!!! I’m just sure I’ve STRESSED THIS FACT ENOUGH BUTTTTT: I AM FUCKING NERVOUS. I’m almost as nervous as a drug addict taking a fucking piss test right now.  If José pulls some shit in this challenge I’m going if we LOSE MY FUCKING COOL LIKE NO TOMORROW. The way I see the connections on this tribe right now is simple: Devon has connections with Sammy/ Chelsea.  Side note: Chelsea acts like I’m the plague in her pm’s.  She ignores me harder than I ignore all of my life responsibilities and I ignore them pretty fucking hard. I believe I’m closer to Alyssa than Devon is but will she have the votes if it came down to it? NO. Sammy is close to everyone. He’s my pick to win right now. He has everything a future winner has.

Color me SHOOK. Im very surprised that they are handling the Jenna very calm and understanding. I might not have been in as much danger as i thought. I told them the truth about why I did the vote and all the reasons. The paranoia. My anxiety that was spiraling out of control. I didnt tell them tho of my connection to Jonesy 🦑❤️ But i want to thank Jones for calming me down from my anxiety before the vote. And to Sarah who helped me after tribal cuz my anxiety kicked up again after i couldnt talk to jones and people were confused on what happened and were asking around. I am much better today tho. A little calmer than last night.

I am really bad at this, I so imma spill some tea, which I don't have much of. Me and Mitchell agreed to work together until merge then we would kill each other whenever it best suited us. Which was a good think to do because apparently I'm a scary comp beast :D If that is all I am remembered for at the end of this game I'll be happy <3 More to come but I am at work soooooo yeah, more to come ~finger guns~

Also I have NO idea why everyone trusts Mitchell so much!! He’s a snake and if he doesn’t go home this week, the rest of my tribe are idiots

Well...that was quick. Aidan taking the advantage is really interesting, and also very telling: 1. Do the fans have a clear majority? Sarah and Dani didn't trust Mitchell, and this would be the perfect time to knock him out. 2. Is Aidan ACTUALLY playing the game? He seems to have a grip on what will happen tonight, which is fearsome, considering he didn't do jackshit on the original fans tribe. 3. What is this twist for later tonight? I predict the advantage has to do with either picking the swapped tribes or sending someone to exile at the F15, making it 7 vs 7 with 1 at exile.

It looks like they may have thrown the challenge? I might be screwed? Like not in the good way. 😏  They said Mitchell’s name and i want to believe them but how are you going to be like i dont want to go to tribal and hope someone else takes it to taking the temptation. Its very clear of their intention. I just hope they are telling me the real target. Cuz if not im dead. And ill be gone. If its me, its been great. Its been fun. I wish i could have lasted longer. But oh well. Sarah i hope you make it far. Jonesy ❤️ Kill it and take the title.

oh my godddd, so sorry I forgot to do a confessional. I completely forget to do them when my tribe doesn't have to go to tribal. ;) I genuinely love my tribe so much and have actively talked to everyone ever since the switch. Now there's talk about swaps that may happen, but I don't want that to happen. :( The only good thing that could come out of a swap is that I would have an easier time choosing someone to vote out if need be, because by the looks of it, my current tribe is the most active and serious about making it to the top. I really don't want any switches to happen unless it's merge! Also, I don't think my tribe is ever going to talk in the temptation chat because we're all so on the same page. Ugh, I love them.

I think Sarah is going home because Mitchell Aidan and I made an alliance. She threw both Mitchell and my name so.