#I WANT HIM SO BAD I NEED HIM SO BAD I CRAVE HIM SO BAD I DESIRE HIM I REQUIRE HIM I YEARN FOR HIM I WISH FOR HIM I LONG FOR HIM

[iamthatonefangirl]

okay imma need a nsfw alphabet for bucky!! maybe tfatws? let me be, we all know im all for that man

you know I gotchu bae. fatws bucky nsfw alphabet incoming...

aftercare: this man is obviously a god at aftercare, no questions asked. he’s kissing every inch of your face, making sure you’re okay and happy and satisfied. even if he’s exhausted he’s always offering to give you one more, two more, as many more as you want, really… he'll make you drink way too much water and then he’s practically pushing you out of the bed to make you pee even when you want nothing more than to sleep. 

body part: he loves every inch of you. doesn’t matter what you think. he loves you. he loves any part of you he can hold onto, dig his fingers into and keep you close to him, whether it’s your chest, your thighs, your hips. the most vulnerable parts of you are the most real, and those are his favorite. he just wants to feel you. 

when he first took his shirt off in front of you, he was concerned. he knows you’re a good person with a caring heart and would never judge him for his scars on his shoulder, but he was still scared. if you flinched away, or cringed, or anything, when you saw him… his heart would shatter. he’d never love again. he wouldn’t see the point in living. 

but you smiled, and looked at him with nothing but adoration and lust. you gently brought your hands to his chest, and his heart fucking melted. he watched your face, taking in your facial expressions as you stepped closer and took in the sight of him. he watched and waited to see what you might do or say. waited for you to scowl and tell him he was ugly. 

but you just… pressed your lips to the scars on his shoulder, and he felt like he could cry. you've only ever made him feel whole.

cum: he’s making a huge mess all over your sheets, skin, everywhere. he loves filling you up and then fucking it back into you. “don’t waste it, baby,” he’s teasing you, overstimulating you with his fingers and plugging you up. 

dirty secret: he kind of wants to learn for himself how it feels when he ties you up. 

experience: you’re his first since after hydra. it scared him, at first, how much he liked you when he met you. he wanted to open up to you, give you everything right off the bat, fuck you senseless right off the bat, but he couldn’t. it took him time, of course, and you were happy to take it slow. but god, the first time you had sex was like heaven. he was a young man once upon a time. an extremely attractive young man, and so it’s fair to say that he knows wtf he’s doing now that he’s comfortable with you. 

favorite position: call him boring, but he loves missionary. he wants to be able to see your eyes, your reactions, and kiss your face while he’s making you feel good. he loves having you lay on the bed, relaxing, while he takes you apart, giving you the princess treatment you deserve.

but when you ride him, fuck, it takes his breath away with how pretty you look. he always finishes way too fast and ends up apologizing over and over again, but you don’t care. he’ll get hard again soon enough. until then he can sit there and deal with the overstimulation <3

goofy: this man loves to have fun with you, especially in bed. most of the time when you’re in the heat of the moment, you’re both pretty serious, but that doesn’t mean there’s no room for fun. one time you were in the middle of getting your shit rocked from behind, making the whole bed shake like crazy, and the lamp on the table ended up getting knocked over, startling both of you. you both couldn’t help but laugh until you cried, at which point he turned you onto your back and kissed you, both of you making jokes about it while you fucked you until you finished, still giggling. 

hair: nothing special. he keeps it clean and tidy. he doesn't let his hair get long anymore, too many bad memories. but he gets the sense you find it attractive so maybe... 

intimacy: this man craves connection with you. he’s always reminding you how much he loves you and needs you in his life, kissing your eyes and nose and cheeks every time he says it. he holds you close and can’t help but remind you of how pretty you are, how well you take care of him, praising and worshipping you as he makes the sweetest love to you. 

jack-off: trying to get back to normal after hydra was… a struggle. it’s fair to say he didn’t get himself off very much before he met you. you have sex fairly regularly, but being with you helped him feel more comfortable and capable of doing it himself. fairly early in your relationship you asked him if you could just watch, and he was hesitant. so you gave him your own little show, which totally spurred him on to do the same for you. ever since then, and the way you looked at him with such lust in your eyes as he touched himself, he’s been so much more confident and willing. you’re just happy he’s getting back to finding himself and being comfortable again in his body. 

kink: he loves to gag you. he just can’t help himself. he totally gets off on putting you in a spider gag and tying your hands above your head while he can sit there and mess with your head, praising and degrading you at the same time for being his good little fuck doll? yeah, that’ll do it for him. 

he’s a sucker for fucking you in front of a mirror. he’ll push you up against the bathroom counter, wrap a hand around your throat, and kick your feet apart, watching your reactions in the mirror. he loves how you devolve into a mess in front of his eyes while he holds himself together, watching the way he’s railing you into oblivion. he holds your head in place so you’re forced to watch him smirk while you’re drooling everywhere.

he loves having control over you and waving it around in your face to taunt you. it’s fun to put you in your place, spank you into submission. total size kink, too.

location: he loves doing it in the bedroom, call him old-fashioned. taking you apart in his bed, making you comfortable, giving it to you the way you deserve. only the best for you. 

but he’s only a man. anywhere you want it, he’ll give it to you. you’ve definitely fucked in his car. on his motorcycle. in an alley outside the dancing club you went to that one time. he’s no exhibitionist, but…

motivation: when you tease him. you love making dirty jokes to him to get him riled up, and it always works. if you’re trying to walk past him in a tight space, you’ll grab his ass or his bulge or grind up against him and then pretend like nothing happened. you’ll buy boxes of popsicles at the store for the sole purpose of licking it like you do his cock. one of these days he’s gonna take the damn popsicle out of your mouth and fuck you with it.

no: no knives, no guns. even if it doesn’t scare you, it scares him too much to think about exposing you to that kind of violence given his history. 

oral: he’s a real man. loves to go down on you when you’re aching and sensitive for him after he’s wrecked you. you’re hissing, telling him to be careful, and he’s rubbing your thighs to soothe you. he loves when you’re vulnerable like this, super tired, walking the line between pain and pleasure, and yet you still let him lick you to his heart’s content. 

he loves your mouth on his cock. it’s a sight to see. getting you on your knees for him, seeing you so willing, parting your lips and drooling on him. he loves it. he moans like crazy and loves talking to you while you’re pleasuring him, saying, “that’s my girl. letting me use her mouth like this. gonna let me fuck it like the rest of your holes, hmm?”

pace: he loves going slow and fucking you deep, but when he wants to? oh he’ll fuck the everliving daylights out of you. he’ll make you beg him to go faster, give it to you rough, and once you’ve said “please��� enough times, sounding all pretty and desperate for him, he’ll give you what you want, making you come over and over while he just keeps fucking you. it’s heavenly. 

quickie: he doesn’t really seek you out much for it, he’s happy to take care of himself or wait until the timing is right. but he loves when you ask for it. one minute he’s busy with something, the next you’re on him, telling him, “I need you to fuck me right fucking now” and he’s gonna do it. he’s gonna make sure you’re happy and well fucked any time you need it. this is when he’ll get a little rougher with you, a little more possessive and controlling, giving you that all-encompassing feeling of pleasure, body and mind. 

risk: he’s hesitant, as are you. he’s not big on taking risks, but the few times you have fucked in public have been exhilarating. he’d be open to doing it again, maybe just once. he’s got an image he’s trying to rebuild. 

stamina: he’s got stamina for days. he’s literally super human. of course, he’s still 100 years old, and the years are starting to catch up to him. but he can still fuck, don’t doubt that. 

toys: anything to get you off, he’ll try. it’s pretty often that he’ll use a vibrator on your clit while he fucks you, all the pleasure going to your head and making your thoughts blur together. he wants to make you forget about everything but how he makes you feel.

every once in a while he’ll fuck your mouth and make you fuck yourself with a dildo just to see how needy and whiney you can get for him. but honestly he’s the one that gets needy because it’s not long before he’s like “fuck this” and he picks you up, chucks the dildo across the room, and then drags you to bed to fuck you himself. also he wants to get you a butt plug to make you wear it in public, bonus points if it vibrates and he can control it from his phone. 

unfair: he does not have it in him. he will tease and edge you maybe once, but he has to watch you come for him, he has to, it's his crack. knowing that he’s making you feel good is more important than anything else. he lowkey wants to ask you to tease him for hours just to see what happens.

volume: bro is a moaning mess for you okay. he tried to hold back the first few times you had sex, but then you got concerned that you weren’t doing enough. when you managed to pull a real moan from him, you fucking celebrated and hollered and he blushed like crazy. so then he finally quit holding back, knowing you wanted to hear him, and he’s like a whiney baby when he fucks you now. 

wild card: he bought a ring. 

x-ray: he’s clearly doing pretty well for himself. he’s got the prettiest dick on the planet, pink and leaky and too big for you to wrap your whole hand around. you try anyways, looking up at him with big puppy eyes as you stroke him up and down, teasing him with little kitten licks to the tip. he stretches you out just right, every time. “such a good girl, opening up so well for me, you know that? just wanna take all of me, but you’re just so little… guess I’ll just have to make you take it, huh?” he says as he stretches you on his fingers.

yearning: he’s a loverboy at heart 🤍 he loves you and always wants to have you close and always wants to touch you. if he’s asleep and you need him to fuck you, he wants you to wake him up, he doesn’t care. 

zzz: he conks the fuck out so quickly. once he knows you’re okay, and you’re hydrated, and you’ve peed, he’s dragging you by the waist to pull you against his chest and he’s out. 

~~~

masterlist

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bucky tag list:

@clavedelune @starfly-nicole @avengersfan25 @thewiselionessss @hextech-bros @a-book-lover-things @ruexj283 @mrsnikstan @sleepysongbirdsings @sapphirebarnes @bananababygirl10 @multiversefanfics @winchestert101 @andziabarnes @chrisevansleftnipple @daisydark @luckyhornet @maryevm @avengemepercy

[ifwdominicfike]

lose the attitude | c.s

summary: after weeks of brat!reader giving dilf!chris attitude he decides that she has to get off without his help.

pairing: dilf!chris & brat!reader

your constant need for attention got you to where you are now. in your defense chris had been “ignoring you” for almost 2 weeks, he wouldn’t really call it ignoring you since he was busy with work and hadn’t had much time to spend with you but who cares? you still needed attention, right?

it started when he would go out to take important calls and would end up staying in his study nearly all day, leaving you grumbling in his bed until you had gotten fed up and went to go see what he was doing. only to be met with his disheveled figure still on the phone but with a now more frustrated look, he would often tell you “just give me thirty more minutes baby, ‘kay?” and you would believe him, until thirty minutes turned to an hour and then to two hours and so on.

you completely understood how his work would keep him from spending not as much time with you but you had needs to! you tried secretly getting yourself off (chris hated when you did that) but it honestly never worked. you needed chris.

the more you tried the more needy and impatient you got, nothing was working and your hands were getting tired. you pout once again when you felt yourself right on the brink of an orgasm, but disappointment takes over once your body wouldn’t let you go fully. you throw your head back in frustration, this is forth time this has happened and you are tired.

and you couldn’t even bother chris to try to convince him to help you because he wasn’t even there, it was another night where he just had to stay late. you roll over to chris’ side of the bed and dig your face into his pillow, your nose is filled with the intoxicating scent of his signature cologne — which only makes you miss him even more. before you could have any second thoughts about it you swiftly grab the pillow and settle it between your thighs, they instantly close around it and you almost moan at the feeling of how it’s rubbing up against you.

you begin to slowly rock your hips back and forth, biting your bottom lip at the sweet feeling of the soft material bumping into your clit at the right pressure. your pace grows faster, needier. you throw your head back as you begin to feel that same pit at the bottom of your stomach, your thighs squeeze around the soft cushion and your pace begins to quicken. you’re almost there — almost there to that sweet relief you’ve been craving for weeks.

until, you feel a hand cradle your jaw. you jump up at the sudden touch and quickly hide yourself with a blanket, when you look up you see chris with a smug look on his face.

“oh don’t let me interrupt you baby, looked like you were having fun, yeah?” he teases, your face heats up in embarrassment. “i thought you weren’t g-gonna be here ‘til a couple more hours..” your eyes darting everywhere but his, “so that just gave you the right to try and get yourself off without me? huh?” his hand now forcing you to look him in the eyes.

you nervously bite the inside of your cheek and try to turn your face away, his hand guides you back to face him. you’re now looking into his eyes filled with frustration, “answer me or m’not gonna be so nice, yeah?” his smile widens as he waits for your response.

“couldn’t wait and- and i needed it so bad” you pout while grabbing his free hand and trying to guide it down to your soaking cunt that’s dampening the material below you. “nuh uh, you wanted to come like that right? go on, you’re not getting me tonight baby. either you come like that or you don’t come at all.” he threatens while pulling back his arm, he watches as you continue on with the rhythm you had before. “good girl, doing just as i say yeah?” his thumb swipes across your bottom lip and he doesn’t even need to tell you anything before you take it into your mouth, sucking on it in desperation.

he groans as he sees you eagerly sucking on his finger while fastening your pace against his pillow, “couldn’t even fucking wait for me baby, you just had rut against my pillow like a desperate thing thinking i wouldn’t find out.” he teases, your legs tighten and you go to hold onto his forearm for stability, “pl-please i — mm need to c-come please let me-“ you babble, half of your words not even making sense but you hope he understands and lets you finally come.

“is that all it really takes for you to huh? just a little bit of some dirty words and your dripping pussy rubbing against my pillow and you’re coming? fucking pathetic.”

he laughs when he sees you whine around his finger, spit dribbling down while you silently beg for release. “come sweet thing, before i change my mind.” he whispers down into your ear, not even a second later your vision goes white and you grasp onto his waist as you fully let go.

“ohh such a good girl baby, m’so proud of you my sweet girl. did s’good for me”

- avery’s note ˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆｡-

only finished this for @mattsstarlet if im gonna be real, and i just realized i did the whole request wrong so im gonna actually work on the real other dilf!chris request 😭😭

taglist - @http-bellaa @chrissv4mp @jetaimevous @chrisbrowser @submattenthusiast-deactivated20 @flouvela @sturniolosiphone @chrislova @sophand4n4 @mattsfavoritestar @mattslolita @y3sterdaysproblem @strnilolover @cayleeuhithinknott @cherrynflowergarden @thinkshespretty @slut4chris888 @marrykisskilled @chaossturns @emely9274 @sturn777 @sturns-mermaid @st7rnioioss @whore4mattsturniolo @courta13 @pip4444chris @amyiasturnl @tezzzzzzzz @matts-wife @theyluvivi @raysmayhem-72

[aajjks]

The Boy (IV)

synopsis. All he ever wanted was someone to love.

pairing: yandere!brahms doll jungkook x fem!nanny reader. ft. Cha eunwoo.

genre: 18+ horror, smut, angst and yandere.

warnings. 18+ YÁNDÈRÈ, dàrk thèmès, dïstúrbíng thèmès, mèntïóns ôf à dàrk pàst, yn ïs só dàmn hórny, dóll, erríe thèmès, únsèttlíng thèmès, híghly sèxúàl thèmès, nèèdy, shàmlèss ýn, tsúndèrè èúnwòò.

wc: idek it’s long tho

fic note. Please keep in mind that this fanfiction is the exact copy of the movie from the same name “the boy” (2016) so if you find any similarities, that’s on purpose. Also viewer discretion is highly advised.

note. Chapter 4 is here please share your thoughts honestly if it’s a little shitty I apologize but it took me a lot of days to finish this, but it’s gonna get so much more juicier. I promise let’s get into this and please share feedback because it really keeps me going and ENJOY!

taglist. @tatumrileyslover @slut4jeon @strawberryberrygirl @starl0ver4 @darkcyclecreator @taekritimin123@erisuna @devilslittlehelper @introvertedsin @jadaocon1 @jungkooknippleanddicksucker @wowersblog@jincapableoflove @whothefuckisthishoe @avawants2havefun @sophipp1 @moonfloweronmars @crisle19 @ctrlsht@mrsjohnnysuh @ennvfv @kpopsmutty69 [open for more]

•••

You wake up, and it’s like the morning should feel normal, right?

But your body is still pulsing with yesterday’s chaos, still aching with that craving.

The doll, though, that little bastard, is still sitting there in the corner, staring at you. You blink, wiping sleep from your eyes, and sigh.

“Why do I even care?” you whisper to no one.

But, for some reason, it feels like there’s something alive in this house. Something watching.

You swing your legs off the bed, feeling that pull, the one that makes you want to collapse back under the sheets.

But the day’s already waiting, and you know you’ve got a damn job to do.

The rules. God, those rules linger in your mind like some haunting melody you can’t get rid of.

First things first, you need to go tend to him.

You stand up, glancing at the mirror, your reflection caught in that weird light. The feeling of being watched is heavier today.

God, was it always this bad?

You walk down the stairs, your steps feeling heavier than usual. Every creak of the floorboards makes you jump.

But, just as you reach the living room, there he is.

Eunwoo. Eating his breakfast. As if nothing happened. “Good morning,” you say, your voice sounding too loud.

He barely looks up from his plate, a small grunt escaping him.

It’s like he’s pretending you’re not even there.

You stare at him for a moment, feeling the heat rising in your cheeks.

“You’re gonna ignore me again?” No response.

You almost want to scream.

Then, you look at the clock. It’s almost time to do the doll’s routine.

Your mind drifts again. And the moment you think of him, the rush of longing hits you like a wave.

You start walking toward the room where the doll waits, but your steps falter when you hear something faint.

A whisper?

You stop dead in your tracks, listening carefully.

“Stay.”

The voice comes from the doll. Or, that’s what you think.

You shiver, but it’s not out of fear. It’s something else. Something dark.

As you walk toward the room, the tension is unbearable.

You open the door and— There he is. Just sitting, his glassy eyes fixed in place.

You can almost feel his gaze, even though he’s not really alive.

“Stay.”

You hear it again, but it’s so soft. So insistent.

You let out a shaky breath, walking in closer, kneeling in front of him.

You talk to him like he’s real. You have to.

“I’m here, JK,” you say. “I’m here.”

But deep down, there’s something gnawing at you. Something so unsettling. The silence is deafening.

You swallow, your eyes darting nervously to the door.

“I’ll make it up to you,” you whisper. “You’ve been so patient with me.”

But then, out of nowhere, a voice cuts through the quiet.

Eunwoo.

He’s standing in the doorway, arms crossed.

“Are you really talking to that thing like it’s a person?” You blink, feeling your face heat up in embarrassment.

But instead of feeling ashamed, your desire only grows.

He’s standing there, as cold as ever, and yet, there’s something off about the way he’s looking at you.

Your thoughts spiral.

“I don’t care if it’s not real, Eunwoo,” you snap, not caring that your voice shakes. “I just want something to look at me like that.”

His expression doesn’t change. He’s still cold, unaffected.

But it pisses you off.

You stand up, your body suddenly tense.

“You know, you could at least acknowledge me, instead of just staring at that doll like it’s your damn king.”

He raises an eyebrow. “JK doesn’t need you. He’s better off without you.”

The words sting, but they only fuel your frustration.

“Is that so?” You take a step closer. “Because, from where I’m standing, you’ve got the whole ‘ignoring me’ thing down.”

His eyes flicker for just a second.

Then he speaks again, his voice so detached, it could cut through anything. “You’re supposed to be taking care of him, not complaining to me.”

You smirk, feeling a mix of anger and something else. “You’re not even worth complaining to. You know that, right?”

His gaze hardens.

“You think I care?” His voice drops lower, colder. “The only thing I care about is whether you’re following the damn rules.”

You stare at him for a moment, the tension suffocating. Your heart beats in your chest.

“Then why are you still here?” you ask, almost breathless.

He doesn’t answer, but you know it’s because he doesn’t care.

You turn away, feeling the frustration and the heat rise.

“Fine,” you mutter. “I’ll follow the damn rules. But don’t think I’m doing this for you.”

And just as you start to walk out, you hear it again. A whisper.

“Stay.”

This time, it’s the doll. The doll speaking.

It almost makes you gasp.

You look at Eunwoo, but his eyes are focused on something else.

The doll’s voice lingers in your mind.

You feel the pull again. And it’s stronger than ever.

•••

The afternoon is quiet.

Too quiet.

You’re sitting at the dining table, eating your buldak noodles like you’re trying to savor every bite, but honestly? You’re not tasting a damn thing.

Your mind is still stuck on Eunwoo and the way he completely dismissed you this morning.

“You think I care?” That’s what he said.

Like you were just some problem he had to deal with. Like you weren’t even worth acknowledging.

You chew another mouthful, letting the spice burn your throat as your frustration swells.

You glance at the doll sitting across from you—staring blankly, as always.

You’ve been talking to it so much, it feels almost natural now.

“I bet you wouldn’t ignore me,” you mutter under your breath. “You’d at least look at me if I did something…”

You trail off, staring at the doll’s lifeless eyes. But, oddly, it feels like it’s staring back.

“I’m talking to a fucking doll.” You laugh bitterly, shaking your head, trying to make sense of it all.

The steam from your noodles rises in front of you, but it doesn’t clear the heaviness in the air. The silence between you and the doll is stifling.

“You’re probably the only one who doesn’t judge me,” you say quietly, almost to yourself.

But even the doll can’t answer.

You feel your anger pulse again, that same damn frustration bubbling up. The noodles are too spicy, but you can’t stop eating them.

It’s like the heat from the food is a mirror of the heat inside you.

Every bite just brings the burn of that rejection closer.

“God, what the hell is wrong with me?” you mumble between bites.

You glance down at the doll again, your eyes narrowing.

“Why does it feel like you get me, huh?” It’s just sitting there. Silent. Unmoved.

But you swear you feel like it’s listening. “Why does Eunwoo get to be all cold and unbothered, while I’m stuck here playing house with a fucking doll?”

You roll your eyes, but the frustration just keeps growing. The noodles aren’t helping.

Your fingers grip the chopsticks tighter, your frustration spilling out into the air around you.

“I hate that he doesn’t even care. Like… why the hell am I doing all this?”

The doll doesn’t say anything, of course. It never does.

But it’s almost like you’re waiting for it to say something.

Anything.

You take another bite, swallowing it down with a grunt.

And then..

“Stay.”

You freeze, noodles halfway to your mouth. The voice isn’t loud, but it’s clear. Too clear.

It’s the doll. It said the word again.

“Stay.”

You set your chopsticks down, a chill creeping over your skin. You thought you’d imagined it last time, but now? Now, it’s almost real.

You glance at the doll, and the air feels colder.

“What the fuck?” you whisper, heart pounding.

It can’t… it can’t be real. Right?

You look down at the doll, eyes widening.

Did it really just say that?

The room feels too still. You start to panic, breathing faster as you pick up your chopsticks again. But you can’t get the words out of your head.

“Stay.”

Your hand trembles, but you try to ignore it. You keep eating, trying to shake it off.

“It’s nothing,” you tell yourself. “It’s just… the silence messing with my head.”

But you can’t shake the feeling that something’s off. Like you’re being watched.

The doll doesn’t move. It doesn’t blink. But for some reason, it feels like it’s waiting.

“I can’t keep doing this,” you mutter under your breath, pushing your noodles around.

You hear it again, that voice. Soft. Low.

“Stay.”

It’s not in your head this time. It’s real. You heard it. You can’t pretend anymore.

“No… no, no, no,” you whisper, your heart racing. “It’s just the house. It’s just too quiet. I’m just, just stressed out.”

You try to stand, but your legs feel weak.

It’s like the whole house is holding its breath. Like the walls are closing in.

You blink rapidly, trying to stay calm. But your chest is tight, and you feel a strange pull, like you have to stay.

You sit back down, not sure why, but something is urging you to stay near the doll. To pay attention to it.

You start to speak, your voice barely a whisper. “You’re not real, right? You can’t really… talk.”

But the doll says nothing. It’s only the silence that answers.

And yet, somehow, that silence feels more real than anything else in this house.

•••

You finish washing the dishes, feeling slightly more at ease because— well, your kitchen doesn’t look like a battlefield anymore.

But the weirdness? The unease? That stays.

The doll’s voice still rings in your ears, and you can’t shake the chill it gave you. “Stay.”

You roll your eyes at yourself, trying to shake it off.

“It’s nothing. Nothing but a creepy little toy with some serious boundary issues,” you mutter, heading back to your bedroom.

You throw your phone on the bed as you kick the door shut behind you, and immediately, your mind starts racing again. What the hell was that voice? The doll’s supposed to be inanimate, right?

Like… right?

You grab your phone, tap Alina’s name, and send her a message before you can stop yourself:

You: Girl, I’m losing my mind. I need you to talk some sense into me. Are dolls supposed to talk? Or am I just officially gone?

You watch the message bubble for a few seconds. Then, finally:

Alina: Yo, what happened? You’re in the middle of some weird creepy vibes or some shit? Should I get the holy water or a shaman?

You laugh out loud at her response.

You: Holy water, girl? Please, I wish it were that simple, you text back, pacing the room. I’m talking to a doll. No, worse. I’m listening to a doll talk back to me! It said ‘stay’ like three times today and I swear it’s not me imagining it!

You wait for her reply, half expecting her to hit you with something like, Girl, just chill. It’s all in your head.’ But instead, she goes full Alina mode.

Alina: Wait, you’ve been cuddling with it or something? Is it, like, some weird fetish shit? I swear, you get involved in the strangest stuff, girl.

You: NO, NO, it’s not a fetish! It’s a fucking doll! you reply, rolling your eyes at yourself as you sit on your bed.

Alina: Well, does it feel like a doll? Like, do you actually feel… things?

You: Alina, what are you even asking right now? you send back, rubbing your temples.

Alina: Just trying to clarify. If you’re gonna be talking to your creepy little friend, at least tell me if it has a pulse, okay?

You snort.

You: Alina, you’re out of control.

Alina’s texts start coming faster now, like she’s just gone full conspiracy theory mode:

Alina: Okay, but wait; is it the kind of doll that talks back only when no one’s looking?

You: I don’t know! It’s just a dumb porcelain thing that someone put on my lap, and now I’m apparently its babysitter!” you text, annoyed but still kind of laughing. “And don’t even get me started on Eunwoo.

Alina: Eunwoo?? You’re still obsessed with that guy? Is he the reason you’re hanging with the creepy-ass porcelain one instead?

You: He’s just… ugh, he’s cold as fuck. He rejects me every time I try to flirt. But, I’m pretty sure he knows I’m obsessed with him, so now I’m just making it worse by hanging around with this doll that won’t even fucking shut up.

You stop, feeling stupid. Did you really just confess all that to Alina?

Alina: Wait, hold up. Are you telling me you’re about to go full I’m-not-a-crazy-person-but-actually-I’m-talking-to-a-doll-now mode because of Eunwoo?!

You laugh bitterly, collapsing back on the bed.

You: I don’t know what’s wrong with me anymore. It’s like… the doll’s the only one that listens. At least it says things like ‘stay’ and ‘pretty.

Alina: Yo, that’s mad weird. But also lowkey hot. Wait, so is the doll, like, trying to flirt with you now?

You freeze for a second.

You: What?

Alina: Because, you know, you’re giving it way too much attention for it to NOT be into you. Like… do you think it’s trying to get in your head?

You bite your lip. That… actually makes sense.

Is the doll playing you?

You: Okay, no. No, no, no. It’s a fucking doll. But at this point, I can’t even tell what’s real anymore.

You text back, frustrated and trying to distract yourself by scrolling through your phone.

Alina: So, what, now you’re doing full-on therapy sessions with it? ‘Cause, I gotta say, this is a new level of weird even for you, girl.

You laugh, but it’s not really a happy laugh.

You: I’m just talking to it, Alina. It’s like I have no one else to vent to. And now, Eunwoo’s all cold and shut off, so it’s like I have… I don’t know… the doll?

Alina: Damn. So, the doll gets all your attention now? What’s next, is it gonna start following you around the house? You said it talks, right? Does it ask for kisses too?

You pause for a moment, your stomach dropping. Did the doll… did it want you to kiss it?

You: Wait, hold on! you text back, I’m literally so paranoid right now. What if it does want me to kiss it? Like… it keeps asking me to stay and saying I’m pretty.

Alina: Okay, I’m honestly dying. Just please, please, please don’t get sucked into the ‘doll wants you’ cult. I swear if you send me a picture of you kissing it, I will throw up on the spot.

You laugh hysterically at her reply, but the laughter dies in your throat as you remember the doll’s cold, hollow stare.

•••

The evening falls quiet, the usual hum of the house fading into that calm, eerie silence you’ve grown so used to.

You’re sprawled on the couch, one leg thrown over the armrest, as you mindlessly flick your finger on your phone screen.

You’ve got Temple Run 2 open.

NOSTALGIA!!!!

No idea why you’re so obsessed with this damn game. It’s mindless and stupid but maybe that’s exactly what you need right now.

You keep failing, but the loops are just so satisfying, and the soundtrack ugh, it’s somehow so nostalgic.

“What’re you doing?”

Your heart nearly leaps out of your chest as you hear his voiceEunwoo, standing there, suddenly too close.

You glance over, blinking in surprise.

He’s looking at your phone. Of course, he’s noticed your utter lack of skill at this game, too.

“Just playing some Temple Run,” you shrug, barely looking at him.

His eyes narrow. “You’re playing Temple Run?”

You roll your eyes dramatically, tapping your phone again. “Yeah, Eunwoo. Temple Run. Ever heard of it?”

He steps closer, and then unbelievably he plops down right next to you on the couch.

Not a single care in the world. The sudden proximity makes you feel all sorts of things you can’t quite explain, but you try to focus on the game.

“I could teach you how to play, if you want,” you say with a teasing smile, knowing full well that you’re about to have way too much fun with this.

Eunwoo doesn’t even look at you. Instead, he’s squinting at your phone like it’s a foreign object.

“I know how to play games.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Do you?”

He grabs the phone from your hand, his fingers brushing yours for a split second and your heart skips.

He swipes the screen, but instead of jumping or sliding, he just runs right into a wall.

“Really?” you laugh, covering your mouth. “That’s your big move?”

He doesn’t respond. He just stares at the screen, frowning in confusion.

“What the hell was that? You’re supposed to swipe left to dodge obstacles. Swipe. Like this,”

you show him, your finger dancing over the screen with exaggerated movements.

He watches you, but when you look over at him, you see a small and by small, barely noticeable smirk tug at his lips.

“I’m just getting started,” he says in that deep voice of his, but the tiny smile is there again.

You can’t believe it. Is he actually smiling?

You’re about to say something, but you catch the slightest glint in his eyesjust for a second and you don’t know why, but it makes your stomach flip.

“You need to be more aggressive,” you tease, leaning in closer than necessary as you guide his fingers with your own, letting him feel the motions on the screen.

His gaze flickers down to your hands, and for a split second, you feel the intensity between you two.

It’s not just the game anymore. Your heart is racing, your skin tingling.

Oh yeah, you want me so bad.

“Aggressive, huh?” he mutters, still not meeting your eyes but there’s a definite playfulness there.

You give him an exaggerated sigh, leaning back against the couch as you pull the phone away.

“Okay, here, let me show you how it’s done, Mr. I Know How To Play Games.”

You tap your phone again, failing the next round on purpose just to mess with him, but then you glance over at him. “See, that’s how you die in the game.”

Eunwoo’s smirk grows ever so slightly. “Maybe I let you win.”

You raise a brow. “Uh huh. Sure you did.”

He’s quiet for a second, and you can’t help but notice how his usual cold demeanor is slipping just a little—

there’s something softer here, something unexpected.

And then, as if realizing how much fun he’s been having, he suddenly straightens up, putting the phone back in your hands.

“I’m done playing games. Not literally. Just…” He looks at you for a moment longer than usual. “I have to go check on… something.”

You blink. “Right. Sure. Whatever.”

Before you can say anything else, he stands up quickly, the moment of connection broken.

You stare at him, feeling strangely off like, just when you thought there might’ve been something, he shuts it down.

The door slams, and you’re left there, phone in hand, your head buzzing from the briefest interaction.

You barely even notice that the doll’s still sitting in front of you on the table, staring at you, its empty eyes almost mocking you now.

But for some reason, you don’t mind. At least someone or something, is paying attention.

•••

You can feel it— the tension from earlier still buzzing between you and Eunwoo.

He’s barely acknowledged it, but you feel it. It’s there, crackling in the air like static.

After the whole Temple Run disaster,

Eunwoo stands up abruptly, taking your phone from your hands without so much as a word.

“I’m gonna cook,” he mutters. “Stir-fry. You can stay out here if you want.”

You freeze for a second, contemplating. “What if I want to stay with you?”

He doesn’t even turn around, but there’s a tiny, almost unnoticeable flicker in his expression.

The corner of his lips twitch like he’s about to say something, but then he just shrugs and walks toward the kitchen, disappearing around the corner.

Your stomach churns but not from hunger, but from something else entirely.

“Alright, bet,” you whisper to yourself, rolling off the couch and following him.

The kitchen is small, cozy in its own way, but with him in it, it suddenly feels too small.

You stand by the doorway, watching him pull out the ingredients for stir-fry with a practiced ease.

He looks so… good doing it.

You lean casually against the counter, crossing your arms, trying to look casual.

“You know, I’m really good at cooking too,” you say, giving him a side-eye.

He doesn’t look at you. “Really?”

“Yeah,” you nod, leaning forward just a little, keeping that seductive energy going. “I make a mean stir-fry. I could show you.”

Still no reaction from him. But his movements slow for a brief second as he slices the vegetables, his fingers curling around the knife just a little tighter.

You know you’ve got him intrigued at least, that’s what you want to believe.

“I’m good,” he says, voice clipped.

“Are you?” You step closer, just enough for him to feel your presence. “I mean, I don’t know. You seem pretty… intense about this. You need a hand?”

He finally looks up at you, eyes narrowing. “You want to help or are you just trying to get in my way?”

You smirk, a mischievous glint lighting up your eyes. “I’m just here to keep you company. It’s not every day I get to watch a pro chef at work.”

He sighs, like you’re annoying him, but there’s a hint of something else there. Maybe it’s that cold smirk of his starting to crack just a little.

“I’m not a pro. I’m just making dinner.”

You can’t help yourself. You step forward again, your body pressing into the space between him and the counter, your breath warm against the back of his neck.

“I can help with more than dinner, you know…”

The words hang in the air, and you feel the slightest shift in him. His breath catches for a second, then he turns, taking a step back. His eyes flicker over you, slow and deliberate, and you can almost feel the heat radiating off him.

“You really think you can just waltz in here, make some innuendo, and I’ll be what, entertained?”

His voice is low, quiet—

but there’s something in it.

Something dangerous.

You can’t stop now, though. It’s like a game. “I’m just offering,” you say, leaning in closer, your lips almost brushing his ear.

“But it looks like you’re already enjoying the company. I’m just here to spice things up a little.”

He finally steps back, hands going to the stove to focus on the stir-fry. “You should stick to the game,” he says, eyes hardening.

“Stay out of my kitchen.”

You laugh, though it’s almost more of a guttural sound of frustration than amusement. “What, you can’t handle a little flirtation?”

Eunwoo stays silent, his gaze unwavering as he stirs the food. But then, out of nowhere, he says, “I’m not here for games.”

You tilt your head, wondering what he means by that. “What are you here for, then?”

He turns to look at you, those sharp eyes locking onto yours. “Dinner. Nothing more.”

You watch him, your heart pounding in your chest.

Dinner, huh?

The way he looks at you, his face unreadable, but his posture tight, the tension between you two thick as ever.

For a second, you’re both stuck in this unspoken challenge.

You can feel your breath quicken, heart racing in a way that has nothing to do with the food he’s cooking.

But suddenly, it’s like something snaps in him. Without warning, he turns, walking toward you with a dangerous slowness, and your body stiffens, bracing for whatever’s coming next.

“I’m warning you,” he murmurs, his lips barely a whisper against your ear, sending a chill down your spine. “Stop pushing.”

And then, just as quickly as he was close, he steps back, resuming his position by the stove.

You stand there, body still humming, feeling the raw power of the moment.

You were so close. Just a breath away.

But maybe you’re not done yet.

•••

The dining room’s quiet, save for the clinking of chopsticks against bowls. Eunwoo and you sit across from each other at the table.

The stir-fry?

FUCKING DELICIOUS.

Most as much as he looks delicious.

It is perfectly cooked, the veggies are still crisp, the meat is tender.

But the real heat isn’t in the food.

It’s in the way Eunwoo barely looks at you as he takes a bite, those sharp eyes narrowing slightly as he swallows.

You try to ignore the heat running through your body, but it’s impossible with him sitting across from you, looking so damn good in his simple, yet painfully stylish, clothes.

You take a deep breath and throw him a playful smirk.

“So, this is how you cook? I thought I’d get more of a reaction from you, to be honest. I make a mean stir-fry too, you know…”

Eunwoo lifts an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed, but there’s a slight edge to his voice. “Do you? I’d be surprised if you even knew what stir-fry meant.”

You almost choke on your rice.

“Excuse me? I could make you a better stir-fry with one hand tied behind my back.”

You give him a pointed glance, then lean back in your chair, your fingers tracing the edge of your glass.

“If you think you’re so good, maybe you should cook for me more often, huh?”

Eunwoo’s lips curl up just a little, but it’s more amusement than anything else. “You can’t handle my cooking. It’s too good for you.”

You roll your eyes dramatically, scooping more food onto your plate. “Please, I live for good food. Don’t flatter yourself.”

“I wasn’t trying to flatter you.”

You raise an eyebrow, leaning forward on your elbows, eyes glinting mischievously.

“Then what were you trying to do?”

Eunwoo doesn’t look up as he sips his water. “Make you stop talking.”

You laugh, setting your chopsticks down. “Good luck with that. You can’t shut me up that easily.”

“You sure?” His voice is so deadpan it almost makes you second-guess yourself.

“You’re a lot of words for someone who doesn’t know how to play a simple game.”

You glare at him across the table, but there’s no denying the flush of heat on your cheeks. “That’s low, even for you. I was teaching you— there’s a difference.”

“Right. Keep telling yourself that.” He smirks, the amusement barely breaking through his cool facade.

But you can see it. And it makes you want to push further.

You grin back, unable to resist the bait. “You know, I’m starting to think you’re just jealous of my skills.”

“You think I’m jealous of you?” Eunwoo laughs, but there’s no humor in it. His eyes flash briefly, something cold and unsettling.

“I’m not the one sitting here trying to get a reaction out of someone who clearly doesn’t want one.”

You pause, just for a second, caught off guard by his bluntness.

But you recover quickly, not about to let him have the last word. “Well, maybe you should try a little harder.”

You lean forward, resting your chin on your hand, giving him a look that says all too much.

“I mean, someone’s gotta make this night interesting. You look like you could use a little fun.”

Eunwoo’s gaze flickers to you, that cold, calculating look in his eyes. “Fun? The only fun I’m having is watching you squirm.”

You chuckle, not intimidated, just thoroughly enjoying the challenge.

“Squirming, huh? Is that what you think? I’m just getting started.”

You pick up your chopsticks again, eating slowly, deliberately, making sure he notices the way your lips part around the food.

His eyes follow the movement, just slightly.. too slightly for you to let go of the game you’re playing.

The silence stretches for a moment, but it’s not awkward. It’s heavy. Like it’s about to snap. You can feel his control slipping just a little.

You break the silence first, your voice light but dripping with sweetness.

“So, Eunwoo, you’re gonna keep giving me the cold shoulder, or are we actually going to have a conversation tonight?”

He exhales sharply, clearly done with the teasing. “We’ve been talking this whole time.”

“Not really,” you say, tilting your head, a playful smile curling at your lips. “I mean, I’m the one doing all the talking.

You’re the one keeping everything bottled up.”

He puts down his chopsticks, looking at you, finally letting a bit of that wall down. “Maybe I’m just waiting for you to say something worth listening to.”

You hold his gaze, the heat between you palpable now, the dinner table acting as the most awkward of barriers.

“Oh, I can say plenty. I just want to know, are you ever going to stop being such a tease?”

His eyes flash, almost imperceptibly, but it’s enough to make your stomach do a little flip.

“You really want me to stop?”

Fuck…. I’m getting wet.

His voice drops, lower than before, the edge of a challenge in it.

You lean forward, body brimming with energy, eyes locked with his. “I want you to do whatever you want to do.”

Eunwoo stares at you for a long moment, his face expressionless, but the intensity in his eyes burns like fire.

“Maybe you should be careful what you wish for.”

Fuck me.

•••

You barely finish your stir-fry when the tension thickens, like overcooked sauce.

Eunwoo stands across from you, wiping his hands on a towel, his face is as emotionless as ever.

You lean back against the counter, watching him like he’s the only thing in the room.

“So,” you start, your voice teasing, “You cook all this food for me, and still no love? No kiss? I’m getting disappointed, Eunwoo.”

He glances at you, his eyes flashing for a split second. annoyance, maybe? or is it something more?

A challenge?

“Love?” he scoffs. “You need to work on your cooking before we talk about love.”

“Oh, please. I’m just a babe in the kitchen.”

You wink, and his eyes roll, but not the way you expect. It’s the smallest roll like you’re on his radar.

“I’m serious,” he says, crossing his arms. “And if you want my help again, stop being so… distracting.”

You pout, hand on your hip. “Distracting? Me? I was just admiring your kitchen skills.”

“Admiring, huh?” He steps closer, his gaze cold but unwavering. “You admire a lot of things, but never seem to get the point.”

You move closer to him, barely an inch apart, your breath hitching as the space between you shrinks.

“Maybe I’m just trying to find the point. Is that so wrong?”

He stays silent, staring down at you. Finally, his lips curl into a smirk.

“I’m not your type. We established this last time.” His eyes darken.

“I don’t make exceptions for people who think they can walk all over me.”

“Is that so?” You lean in, daring him to make the first move. “Guess I’ll have to change your mind.”

Before you can say anything else, you hear it.

That soft whisper. The one you thought you imagined.

From the dining table.

“Stay…”

You freeze.

Eunwoo freezes too. You both turn to the doll, sitting motionless, eyes locked on you.

The room goes still. The air grows colder. A chill runs up your spine as you stare at the doll’s unblinking eyes.

“Stay…” The whisper comes again, almost pleading.

“Great. Now it’s talking,” you mutter, trying to shake the unease creeping in.

Eunwoo doesn’t look at you. He’s already walking to the table, his expression unreadable.

He gently adjusts the doll’s position, fingers brushing its face with care.

“Remember the rules,” he says, his voice low. “No ignoring him. He’s not a toy.”

You raise an eyebrow. “I wasn’t ignoring him. I—;”

“Just keep it in mind,” he cuts you off, adjusting the doll, making sure it’s sitting properly.

You roll your eyes.

“You could be a little less cold about everything. Maybe if you weren’t so icy, you’d warm up to me a little.”

Eunwoo turns to face you, eyes hard. “I’m not here for games. I’m here to make sure this place runs properly.”

You smirk. “And that means babysitting the doll and ignoring me? Come on, eunwoo. I know there’s something under all that coldness. I can feel it.”

He walks back toward you, slow and deliberate, and for a second, you think he’ll say something. But he doesn’t. He simply stands in front of you, arms crossed.

“No,” he growls, low and tense.

“You don’t feel anything. You just think you do. And it’s irritating.”

The words hang between you. The heavy silence is deafening.

You’re close enough to feel the heat of his body, the pulse of his heart.

Then the moment breaks.

The doll whispers again.

“Stay…”

It’s a command now, not a request. You turn to the doll, unease creeping under your skin.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m staying, okay?” You snap, but the doll’s eyes are locked on yours, and it feels too real.

Eunwoo stares at the doll for a beat, then looks back at you.

“You have no idea what you’re dealing with, do you?”

•••

I’m behind the damn wall, watching.

But this time, it’s different.

I can feel it. That little voice in the back of my head, telling me that Eunwoo’s days are numbered.

And honestly? I’m fucking done.

I’ve had enough of him. Enough of the way he looks at you like you’re some kind of decoration.

I know what you’re thinking. how could he even be a threat? But that’s the thing.

He’s not.

I’ve been here long enough to see it. He’s only here because I let him be.

He’s just a placeholder, and I can’t stand it anymore.

Not when you’re just… there. So damn close. Just out of reach, because he’s in the way.

I’ve been patient. I’ve been waiting. But now? Now, I can’t sit back and watch anymore.

Eunwoo’s too soft.

He doesn’t know how to claim anything. He’s all smiles and coldness, pretending he knows what’s best for you, but he doesn’t.

He’s just playing the part.

And it’s time to put an end to that.

I glance at the kitchen, my thoughts darkening as I hear him talking to you.

He thinks he’s helping you, but all I can see is a fucking puppet acting like he belongs here.

I’m better than him. Hell, I deserve to be here more than he does. This house?

This job? It should be mine.

The rules? Are already mine to enforce.

I should’ve been the one you turned to. Not him You should’ve been mine from the start.

He walks out of the kitchen, his usual smug expression still plastered on his face.

I can’t stand it.

I don’t care if he’s a “good guy” or whatever. He’s in my way, and that’s all that matters now.

The idea starts to form. Slowly, at first. Then it hits me like a truck.

What if I fired him? What if I became the butler?

No more Eunwoo, no more outsider pretending to be what I should’ve been.

I can do this. I will do this.

I’m better for you. I know what you need. More than anyone. More than that fucking idiot.

He’s just a temporary fix. I’m the real deal.

I close my eyes, letting that thought sink in. I’ll show you, I think. I’ll be the one who gives you everything you need.

Not him.

Not that doll. Me.

And when he’s gone, when Eunwoo’s out of the picture and it’s just me and you, things are going to be different. Better.

I can’t wait to make you see that. To make you realize you’ve always needed me.

And then? Then, I’m going to remind you exactly who you should be with. No more distractions. No more pretending.

I hear Eunwoo’s voice again— laughing, talking to you like he’s your equal.

Like he has any right to be here. I can feel my teeth grind as I press my hand against the wall.

I want to tear the whole place apart. But I know better. I’ll play this slow. Play it right.

I’ll wait.

But not for long.

•••

Eunwoo sits on the edge of his bed, staring at his phone screen.

The house. The mansion.

It’s all starting to feel suffocating.

He’s been living here for what feels like forever now, taking care of everything in Mr. Jeon’s absence.

And the constant presence of you with your flirtatious glances and constant teasing, only makes it worse.

He can’t escape it.

You’re everywhere.

And frankly, he’s had enough.

But as he leans back on his bed, running a hand through his disheveled hair, a new notification buzzes on his phone.

It’s from Mr. Jeon.

He opens the message, his heart pounding for reasons he can’t quite understand.

Eunwoo, we’ve made arrangements. You are no longer needed in the house. There’s someone else we’ve chosen to take over. We appreciate everything you’ve done, but please pack your things. Don’t contact YN unless I say otherwise.

The words hit him like a cold splash of water. His stomach tightens, and for a second, he thinks he might be dreaming.

No. This can’t be real.

He stares at the message in disbelief, his grip tightening around his phone.

He scans it again, hoping for some sign that it’s a joke. But no, it’s crystal clear.

He’s being replaced.

Replaced.

His mind races. He’s been here for months, helping out, maintaining everything.

Mr. Jeon has always been distant, and you… well, you have been nothing but a problem.

A beautiful, infuriating problem.

The flirting, the jokes, the little games. At first, he thought it was harmless, but over time, it wore on him.

But despite his annoyance, he’d always been there for you. He’d made himself available, like he should have.

Yet, after all this time, all the care he’s put into the house and the way he’s tried to keep things smooth, he’s out.

And you?

You’ve been playing your games, too. Constantly teasing him, giving him these looks— like you know how badly you’re getting under his skin.

But now?

It doesn’t matter. He’s gone.

His phone slips from his hand, clattering onto the bed, as he rubs his temples.

Why did it have to end like this?

He stands, pacing around the room, his mind working overtime.

He knows he can’t stay here much longer, but he refuses to leave without some kind of explanation.

Some closure.

Then, the thought hits him.

Maybe it’s you. Maybe Mr. Jeon’s decision has something to do with you.

The way you flirt with him.

The way you tease him, your constant presence in his life, even when he doesn’t want it.

You’ve always been a distraction, a chaotic one, and maybe it’s finally gotten to Mr. Jeon.

A twisted part of Eunwoo wants to confront you, to demand answers.

But he knows that won’t do anything. Honestly, it is not your fault and You’re a force he can’t control.

He sighs, running a hand through his hair again, frustration simmering beneath his calm exterior.

He can’t leave this place, not without feeling like he’s lost something.

And as for you?

Well, he’s going to miss you. In his own way.

Even if it’s just for the sheer annoyance of it all.

•••

You wake up to the soft light of the morning filtering through the curtains. As soon as you open your eyes, there is a huge smile on your face.

The house is eerily quiet, almost like it’s holding its breath, waiting for something to happen.

You stretch, rubbing your eyes, still feeling the weight of yesterday’s events.

Honestly, it was such a nice night yesterday.

Your mind drifts back to Eunwoo, his cold demeanor, his calmness, and that strange little smile when you tried to get him to play games with you.

But today feels different. Something’s off. The house feels emptier.

You push the sheets off your legs and stand, the floor cool beneath your bare feet.

You feel the sudden need to wander, to escape the quiet of your room and distract yourself from the gnawing feeling in your chest.

As you walk down the hallway, you pass the door to Eunwoo’s bedroom. It’s cracked open just slightly.

You stop. Something compels you to push the door open, just enough to peek inside.

And there he is.

Eunwoo, packing his things. His clothes are neatly folded, his things carefully placed in a bag.

You blink, feeling your chest tighten.

“Eunwoo?” Your voice is small, unsure.

He doesn’t look up at first. It’s like he didn’t even hear you, but then, after a beat, he straightens and turns toward you, his face unreadable.

“I’m leaving,” he says quietly, as if the words don’t even matter.

You freeze, not sure if you heard him correctly. “What?”

You repeat, the word escaping your lips like a breathless gasp.

“What do you mean? You can’t just leave.”

He’s just messing with you… right because this has to be a fucking joke.

He looks at you for a long moment, his expression distant, like he’s already miles away in his mind.

“I’m done here,” he says, his tone calm but final. “They’re bringing someone else in. A new butler. I don’t need to be here anymore.”

Your heart sinks.

The words hit you harder than you expected, and before you even realize it, your eyes are welling up with tears.

You bite your lip, trying to hold it together, but it’s like everything from the past few days, all the teasing, the flirting, the silence, crashes down on you all at once.

“No…” you whisper, more to yourself than to him. “Please, don’t leave…”

Eunwoo stands still, his gaze softening for just a moment as he watches the tears that you’re trying desperately to hold back. You don’t know why it hurts so much..

why his leaving hits you like this.

It’s not like you were close.

He’s always been distant, cold, and you’ve been pushing him away with your flirtations and teasing.

But now, standing there in front of him, watching him pack, you feel like you’re losing something you didn’t even know you wanted.

“I’m sorry,” Eunwoo mutters, his voice low. “I shouldn’t have been so… cold.”

His words surprise you. For a moment, you just stare at him, unsure if he’s serious.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” he adds, his expression softening even further.

It’s strange.

You’ve never seen him like this before, and it makes your chest tighten even more.

You wipe at your eyes, trying to steady your breath. “I didn’t want you to leave,” you say quietly, your voice shaking. “I didn’t think I’d miss you.”

Eunwoo is hesitating and for the first time since you’ve known him, you see a hint of uncertainty in his eyes.

It’s almost like he doesn’t know how to respond to your vulnerability.

“I didn’t know you cared,” he admits quietly.

“I—;” you pause, not sure how to explain it. “I don’t know what I expected, but this isn’t it.”

For a moment, the air between you two is thick with unspoken things.

You can feel the weight of the silence wrapping around you, and your emotions threaten to spill over again.

Eunwoo steps toward you slowly, closing the distance between you.

“Don’t cry,” he says, his voice gentler now. “It wasn’t my intention to make you upset. I didn’t think…”

He trails off, clearly unsure of what to say. His eyes meet yours, and this time, there’s no judgment, no walls between you. Just softness.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, and this time it feels real.

You sniffle, trying to steady yourself, but it’s no use. The tears come, and you don’t fight them anymore.

“I didn’t think I’d feel like this,” you confess. “I didn’t think it would hurt this much.”

Eunwoo looks at you, his face still soft but thoughtful, and for a second, you swear you see a flicker of something behind his eyes.

Maybe it’s regret. Maybe it’s more than that.

“Maybe I’ve been too cold,” he says, taking a hesitant step closer. “Maybe… maybe I was wrong.”

The vulnerability in his voice catches you off guard.

For a moment, you forget that he’s been so distant all this time.

Maybe he’s not as unaffected as you thought.

Maybe you weren’t the only one pretending.

As you look at him, the space between you two seems to shrink.

You can feel your heartbeat quicken, but the words you want to say don’t come.

And in that moment, you realize—

Eunwoo’s departure isn’t just about him leaving.

It’s about the fact that, somehow, you’ve become attached to him without even meaning to.

And now, he’s about to walk out of your life.

Fuck no.

[jupitermarss]

"you're evil, baby"

wolf hybrid!chan x human!reader  warnings: pillow humping, oral (f!rec), slight humiliation if you squint, chan is in rut and needs to mate real bad, reader is a little mean but she loves him, it's not their first rodeo. also like one usage of y/n

sometimes you’re just not in the mood for penetration, and that’s okay. 

the timing this week wasn’t in your and chan’s favor though, and his primal wolf heritage has kicked in at the most inconvenient moment. but you can’t just deny your good boy his relief, can you?

“fuck, p-please, ynnie, it hurts..-” chan whines as he’s grinding against the mattress through his grey sweatpants, an exposing wet spot already obscenely visible on the fabric. you gently pet his curly, grown out hair and slightly tug at the roots, scratching the skin of his head with your fingernails and massaging it for some sort of comfort. 

“i know, baby, c’mere, let’s get you situated,” you coo with compassion, making a very loosely resembling hole out of a few pillows for chan to hump. he glances at you in almost disbelief, clearly wanting, craving more, but you encourage him with a nod, and he complies, though not without a very obvious sigh. 

“i’ll be right here, channie, i’m right here,” you reassure him as you scoot closer and tug at his pants to lower them down to his knees.

oh, he looks desperate, with his crazy wagging tail that now knows no rest, sweeping left and right out of overflowing excitement while the triangle fluffy ears are pressed down to the crown of his head, all tensed up and indicating obedience. 

it’s not your first time together when chan goes into rut, but it’s still a bit of a mindfuck to see this change happen. you can tell the exact moment his half wolf dna completely takes over and turns his brain off like a switch. poof, and your scary confident alpha wolf of a boyfriend is gone, replaced with a brainless little doggo who just wants to play and mate. and despite chan’s fit and buff body, his entire frame now looks almost tiny in front of you as he nuzzles his face into your palm and drools onto your skin a little. 

“aigoo, do you really want it that badly, wolfie?” you ponder out loud while scratching between chan’s ears and watching his tongue loll out of his mouth, little drops of saliva leaving stains on the bed sheets. you notice chan’s breathing become more erratic, heavy, he’s basically panting at this point, his gaze all hazy and unfocused as if he’s looking through you, not at you. 

“c’mon, baby, be a good boy and hump. you want your release, don’t you? it’s the best you can get, so be good and use it,” you take the long wavy strands of hair away from his forehead and make sure to look chan right in the eyes, checking if he’s grasping the meaning of words at all at this point. as you’re looking over his features, so fucked out already, you may add — you can’t resist putting your thumb into his mouth, pressing on his tongue and softly caressing the surface. his sticking out canine fangs are sharper than normal, and you almost yelp when he locks his jaw and gives your hand a hungry bite. 

“ouch! channie...-” you wince and pull away with a hiss. chan looks at you with his watery boba eyes, guilty. he didn’t mean it, he just can’t control his strength well right now. 

it’s okay. you know everything feels heightened for him, and his own body is foreign, disorienting him with too many new intense feelings and needs to focus on. 

chan howls weakly, but you pet his head for reassurance, calming him down and kissing his hair. and while rubbing your nose against it, you can’t help but notice chan’s smell has also changed, more musky and sweet. heavier and deeper too, sweat and arousal mixed with skin pheromones to attract a mate. it’s definitely working. 

“you can have a little taste, if you want,” you murmur softly, watching him hump his little pillow nest restlessly like a good, good boy. he deserves a treat for being so good, you decide. 

positioning yourself in front of chan, so that he doesn’t have to move much and ruin the pillow mountain, you spread your legs and pull your underwear to the side, not bothering to even take it off fully. 

he whimpers at the view as if he’s in pain, and you tut and point your finger in front of his nose, making him cross his eyes to stare right at it. 

“no fucking, just lick,” you warn, foreseeing wolf’s intentions to put his entire, longer than human tongue all the way up your cunt. he nods frantically and, you think, mindlessly, too, but you let him get closer anyways. 

chan’s drooling, a lot. and his thick saliva drips onto your stomach and thighs, marking you up with chan’s scent and making you just as filthy in a matter of seconds. 

as soon as his soft slippery tongue laps at your folds, you sigh in contentment, relaxing into the warmth of his mouth and allowing him to properly eat you. he’s not as intricate with it as usual, though, resembling a dog a lot more and sticking to primitive wide licks and simple patterns. it still makes your clit tingle nonetheless. you don’t really want to cum, either. just indulging yourself in the process and to channie’s greed feels just as nice.

time stops to exist for a while, and you genuinely lose track of how long you’ve been lying like this, legs wide open and watching your boyfriend feverishly fuck his leaking cock into the pillows. judging by the pool of saliva and wetness underneath you, it’s been a minute. though, chan shows no signs of fatigue — his stamina got boosted by the hormone surge, as well. 

it’s not really enough for him to properly satisfy his urges, you both know it. he needs to knot. he needs to mate, probably for hours, too, which you barely handle even when you do indulge him in penetration. chan’s okay with it too, he knows he can’t just demand to be his fucktoy any time his body wakes up to his animal genes, and those compromises tend to satiate both of you enough to get through the day. “let me help, baby, come closer.”

chan’s eyes shoot up to you sharply, and his ears perk up all ready and attentive, a clear sign of him getting closer to his release. 

the pillows are a wet and, truthfully, crumpled ruined mess at this point. probably unusable and to be discarded, shape completely lost and fabric soaked and sticky from chan’s leaky precum.

“let me jerk you off,” you wrap your palm around his heavy, dark red canine cock, and start to pump with the same pace he was humping, already feeling his knot tighten up at the base of his length. what a shame it’s in vain this time. you don’t close your legs nor really change the way you were sitting, still exposed with your licked up pussy on full display for chan to enjoy while you’re working his dick to relief. you like it when he stares. 

“hands behind your back, wolfie, and don’t move your hips. if you buck into my fist, i stop,” another warning leaves your lips, and you know you’re being mean, but judging by how chan’s cock pulsates and jumps up in your hand, hard as a fucking rock, you assume he kinda likes being bossed around like that, too.

he does as he's told.

chan’s pretty eyebrows are furrowed into the neediest expression you’ve seen on him so far, so you don’t dare to tease any longer. you squeeze his burning hot flesh and begin to move your fist, sloppy and fast, so fast your arm cramps at some point, but you know that’s how chan likes it, and more importantly, how he needs it right now.

thick ropes of cum shoot right into your hand as chan finishes with a loud howl, arching his back while his entire body shakes and trembles, finally letting go of the pent up need. the sweat on chan’s silky skin has formed into cute glassy beads, and his curls have got even more of a swirl because of that wetness at the nape of his neck and near his temples. 

“you’re evil, baby,” he mutters finally, after all this time of staying non-verbal.

"and you're horny," you giggle quietly as you kiss at chan’s mouth, feeling his fangs with your lips and humming a calming tune to slowly ground him back into reality. 

[glitter-stained]

"ugh i hate Snowbirds so much they really ruined Roy's character by making him an addict and also it was one story a long time ago but nobody ever lets it go like it's fine we get it he's okay now why are we never letting it go he deserves so much better when will dc fans grow past this" -> buddy you are about to become so well acquainted with my good friend, Hammers

[https-murdock]

rough - matt murdock

summary: he knows you’ll let him take you any which way he wants to.

word count: 780

warning: ⚠️ p in v! (wrap it up!), dirty talk, slapping, choking, insults, ass play (i’m shy don’t mention it), rough sex, religious imagery (ish?)

note: a lil sequel to gentle! not related at all but i loved writing gentle so much <3 wanted to do a little best friend for her. hope ur all ok!!! love you x

you can feel it in everything. you can feel him in all of you.

the way his calloused fingers have wrapped themselves around your neck, gently yet strong enough to restrict it, enough for him to feel the pulse pounding underneath your skin.

“good girl, sweetie.” he’s growling, his other hand tapping the side of your face a few times, enough to grin when he hears you wail at the harsh contact. “so good for me when you let me take whatever i want, such a little slut for me, huh?”

his hips are keeping the same punishing pace, connecting with yours so hard that you know the neighbours can hear the headboard slamming against the wall - you just don’t care, he’s already fucked all the thoughts out of you.

“h-ple-“ the way you’re trying to speak amuses him, almost makes him laugh. his cock pushing it’s way against your cervix, eyes seeing white hot blotches and all you can do is let him take his anger out on your already sore pussy.

“ah, poor baby can’t even speak…” matt grins, letting his hand clutch tighter around your neck and listening to the noises that escape your throat underneath him. “told you not to wear those panties while i was gone… especially not to send me pictures while i can’t touch you. dirty slut.” he spits.

“matt please, god- please.” you let yourself beg, finally letting go of the fraction of pride you held so close to your chest, even when he’s buried so deep inside you it’s notching at your chest.

he knows for a fact you’re all his, right there and always wet enough for him to slide right in - to play with you, throw you around as much as he needs to according to how bad his day has been. matt is always hyper aware of the fact you’re always at his beck and call, willing to let him engulf you in so many ways.

“don’t use his name in vain, honey. you ask me. no one else, understand?” he can feel you nodding below him, hand finally moving - pounding pace not slowing even the slightest - as his fingers reach right to the back of your throat, and you can feel the way his cock swells inside you at the sounds you make. “only me, baby. only i can make you feel this way, correct?”

“yesyes, yes…” you splutter between gags, his hands still clawing at the back of your tongue and relishing in the sounds he’s pulling from you. your pussy accepting him so well, the sounds of your slick filling his bedroom. the fact that he’ll make you leave just after this, tell you that he’s busy and you can’t stay, has left your mind as you accept any attention or treatment you’ll get from someone like matt murdock.

“so willing to take me like this, so desperate.” he chuckles, deep voice drawling above you when you’re suddenly flipped, his arms lifting your hips up and spreading you apart so he can touch you in all the places he craves so badly. face down, you can’t watch him anymore, can’t anticipate what’s coming next - and you certainly don’t expect his finger to start rubbing at your tight little muscle, something he hasn’t done before.

sliding back into your heat, you feel his finger dip past the edge. “so tight everywhere aren’t you baby? all mine, all of your holes are all mine.”

“yes matt all yours, i’m all yours.” the words are still spilling from your lips like you have no control on what’s coming next. you’re not even fully aware of what comes next, body letting his ravage you with harsh and strong thrusts, not holding back from taking everything out on you. finger sliding in and out of your tight hole so slowly it sends you finally over the edge.

clenching around him so tightly he can barely keep pushing in, he growls “i didn’t say you could come, did i?” and he’s angry now, you can tell in the way his hand grips your hair, pulling backward to make you look at him, watch him. “pl- no, i’m sorry, so sorry… please come in-“ you begin the begging, knowing that your early release means you won’t be allowed the privilege of walking home and feeling him drip down your thighs.

“no, you’ll wait for me, i didn’t say you were allowed, so you don’t get what you want.” he grunts, finally pulling out and letting himself spill all over your back, other hand holding you open so he can push his cock between your cheeks.

“dirty bitch.”

tags 🏷️ -

@lambmurdock @parker-murdock @silas-aeiou @audreyclimbs @pupmurdock @millennial-birkin @poeticbookwormcat @xoxabs88xox

[withafoll]

He needs you.

Arthur Morgan x fem!reader

(Inspired by a C.ai bot by addynot)

The material was tight, but not overwhelming. His gentle hands kneaded the laces and tied them together firmly. Although not too comfortable, it wasn’t suffocating. In a suave motion, his digits ran over the corset’s front, pressing a chaste peck to your exposed neck.

“Don’t know how you could wear somethin’ like this.” He breathed out, his voice hardly above a whisper.

Of course, the dim-witted man understood nothing of beauty or its standards.

"You would say that," you say, smirking.

He chuckled lowly into your skin. After checking the laces for one final time, he spun you around, his calloused hands settling on your waist.

“What’s that supposed’ta mean?” Arthur murmured, his gaze roaming leisurely up and down your figure.

"Beauty has rules, not that I'd expect you to know, you spend all your time around men"

He snorted in response to your comment, but a sly smirk was still plastered onto his lips. Taking a step closer to you, his grip on your waist tightened.

“Yeah? And what’s so bad about hangin’ round’ men?” He questioned, his gaze flicking down to your cleavage in-between words.

You wrap a hand around the back of his neck, pulling the tie of your corset slowly, untying the front. "You tell me"

Your words and actions made him gulp, his adam’s apple bobbing up and down. His gaze remained locked on the corset, and he found himself watching with hunger in his eyes as the fabric loosened.

He was a weak man when it came to you. Despite the fact that he never openly admitted it, he wanted you so much it hurt.

“Damn, sweetheart…” He muttered, his fingers twitching against your waist.

"You tell me" you say again, pulling his hair just enough to make him look at you in the eye.

He winced softly from the tug on his hair, and his gaze flickered up to meet your eyes.

“You’re too damn pretty…” He mumbled in a trance-like manner, staring at your face with a sort of desperate longing.

He knew he was being vulnerable, and he was embarrassed by the words he just said. But the need to touch you and feel your mouth against his was too intense for him to deny any longer.

You tug at his hair again, smirking. "You're gonna be good for me, yeah?" You ask, voice low and seductive, pulling my corset off to reveal the shift underneath.

His breath visibly hitched as the corset fell to the floor with a quiet thump. He forced his gaze to remain locked on your face, but it was difficult.

“Sweetheart…” He murmured, his tone pleading.

His fingers clutched at your hips, and he had the urge to pull you closer. As close as physically possible.

"Mm mm" you say, disappointed "Be good"

He sucked his lower lip into his mouth, eyes fluttering at your words.

“Please…” His low croons grew needier by the second. “Lemme touch you….”

Arthur was desperate, craving your touch. There was no way he could wait for you.

"You are touching me, baby"

He let out a shuddering sigh at that. The word “baby” sent a shiver down his spine, and only increased the desperation building up inside him.

“Ain’t enough…” He muttered, his hands gripping your waist tighter, and he pulled you flush against his body.

"I think its plenty" you smirk, teasing.

“You’re a tease, ya know that…?” He growled lowly, his gaze sharpening with lust.

He ducked his head, nose pressing into the crook of your neck. He inhaled softly; the sweet, subtle scent of your skin driving him wild again.

[differenteagletragedy]

Idk if you’re looking for any ideas and if you’re not than just disregard this lol, anyway I absolutely love your writing, I was thinking the song “it will come back” by Hozier is so soap coded, idk if you heard it but if you haven’t you should listen to it, makes me think of soap everytime, anyway you could totally do something with him and this song and I’d eat it right the fuck up 🤤

Thank you!! I am always looking for ideas, and I love getting them from songs — I haven’t heard this one, but I hope you like it!

Johnny is the life of the party. When he's on leave, when he's allowed to be relaxed, he does just that. He's never met a stranger ... but he's never had someone who really knows him, either.

The people at work know him as one thing, his family knows him as another. The girls he meets sometimes down at the pub, they know him as something else entirely. Because he can be an attractive, charming man, and he can be a good soldier, a doting son, a jerk of a little brother.

But he can't be all of it at once. And he certainly can't show anyone what lies beneath.

You, with your little claws, you scratch at it. You dig into him, pulling back the skin and muscle, rooting around in your attempts to get at his deepest self laid bare.

"Not such a good idea, hen," he tells you one night when, after he pulls out of you, you pull him in to hold him close.

It's your fifth or sixth time hooking up, a casual thing -- at least, that's what he tells himself. And each time, you take a little more of him when it's over.

"Why's that?" you ask softly, like you don't know exactly what your doing. You press his head against your chest, cradling it there, and stroke his back with delicate touches that he could so easily become addicted to if he wasn't terrified of needing something like this.

"Lots of reasons," he answers. "I snore like a bear, for one."

"And for two?"

He smiles, tilting his head to rest his chin between your breasts, looking up at you, and says, "I steal the covers."

You smile back, considering. Then you sink your teeth in.

"Why don't you ever want to stay the night? Truly."

"No one ever taught you not to feed stray cats?"

It's another deflection, one you don't even respond to -- you just keep moving your hands, soothing his already sated body until he sighs and lays his head back down on you. Your heart beats steady against his ear, and he digs his fingers into your side where he holds you.

"Why would you want me to?" he asks.

"Because I like you," you tell him, not missing a beat. "I like spending time with you. You're funny and cute and you seem a little sad, but like you don't want to show it, and I've kind of started realizing that I don't care for that."

If there's a way to answer that, Johnny has no idea what it is.

He's not even sure himself what he's sad about, or why he can't just talk to you about it all. He always puts these arbitrary little qualifiers on the time you spend together and what you are to each other. "Just having fun, lass." "Let's not get too attached, shall we?"

Maybe it has something to do with being the youngest of four -- maybe it taught him how to need less. Or perhaps it has to do with being a third-generation soldier. Maybe self-reliance has been bred into him.

Or maybe it's all bullshit. Maybe he knows exactly how much he craves this -- not just your body, but these softer moments when you hold him, when you ask him questions and then wait to hear him answer -- and he simply can't stomach it. Can't bear the thought of having it for real, all the time, only for it to be ripped away, one way or another.

Because whether it's a toy snatched away by his sisters' hands, a uniformed stranger sitting him down with a somber "son, we've got some bad news about your father," or some girl who he could see himself falling in love with telling him she just can’t handle the stress of being with someone like him, things always get ripped away from him.

He’d like it, he thinks, if he could talk about all this with you. You’re so smart and insightful, and the way you look at him sometimes makes him think you really see him. He wonders, fleetingly, if you could be one thing that he got to keep.

But he can’t talk about it, not just yet.

Maybe next time.

[asexualperversion]

I fi may request a dad!Ace x mom!reader where they teach their kid to punch bad guys using a marine or enemy pirate. Ace, in complete shock, yells like, "Why would you do that?" but the reader points out 'its better to start early,' and references his childhood, much to his annoyance. This video/clips of a character from Zenless Zeno Trifger, where she lets a kid punch someone while she's so proud, made me giggle so much, and I need this to happen.

Ace x Fem! reader Teaching Their Child Young

ACCEPTING REQUEST

Au but the only different is that Akainu's dead. This is a world were ace LIVES FOREVER

Ace, while nervous, loved the chance to be a dad. He respected Gold D Roger as the king of the pirates, but we saw in his backstory that he hated him as his dad. His relationship with his father was very lacking. The only thing his dad left him was the stigma of his blood. This is something Ace had to grow up with. While he was fending for himself, he also had to tackle the impact of Gold D. Roger. This led Ace to become a pirate and fight against what society said about him. It's also what led him to find a family with Pops and the white-beard pirates. Whitebeard wasn't a name that brought shame to his existence. He provided a family and support system outside of Luffy and (as far as he was aware) the deceased Sabo. It probably combated a lot of loneliness Ace didn't realize he felt. Pops probably became a genuine father figure. (highkey and unnecessary trauma dump rn, but I am so jealous of Ace bc I wish my dad was not present and despite my need for independence I still oddly crave a father figure despite how I push them away) That's where a lot of his healing came from. He learned to embrace who he was and live as Fire Fist Ace, Division Commander of the White Beard Pirates. Not the damned Gold D Rogers bastard son. His sense of self and individuality. But he had a chance to maybe make up for it. With the woman he loved. When you got pregnant, he saw another future. One where he could do right by being present. Of course, there's the fear of what his child may think of him as a pirate. But it wasn't going to stop the baby on the way. Ace would provide a life for you and your baby. He would also be very attentive during pregnancy, given how his mother passed. And you had a baby girl, he was outnumbered by you. She's as rambunctious as her father. The toddler phase brought out the will of D. His baby could never hate him, but she could turn into him. Dealing with himself is something Ace was not prepared for. Especially as he walked onto the deck of the moby dick to see his darling girls and … some pirates. "What?" he stood there stunned before walking over to get a better look "What are you doing with our daughter?" You smiled up at him, holding a raggedy and bruised pirate in a full Nelson "ya know, just teaching her young" Right in front of you was your little girl. Dark hair in a ponytail and band-aids on her knuckles. "Look Dad I knocked out his tooth," she said holding the tooth up in her little hand. "That can't count honey, I think it was loose" you teased at her. Ace sighed, picking up his little girl and grabbing the tooth out of her hand. "I don't think she needs to be learning this so young" Tossing the tooth away and looking over at you. "Garp taught you young; you turned out just fine." He opened his mouth and closed it, squeezing his daughter closer to his chest, holding her desperately, scared of the idea of her growing up. "That old bag just wanted me to be a marine." "Yeah, and well, he left you with mountain bandits." At that, he chuckled, looking between you and your child. "Maybe we should visit Grandpa soon?"

[concretejunglefm]

hello, jester here. xoxo i had a Thot today that i thought you might appreciate, but there's no pressure to do anything with it. feel free to delete it if you want, even -- i just don't think i'll end up doing anything with it.

spent my shift at work thinking about reader with puppy!noah and puppy!folio. they try so hard to be well-behaved for you, but they *are* puppies. they can be mischievous. and sometimes it's hard to keep track of both of them, so you clip their collars together. (my first thought was a carabiner through the d-rings on the collars, but that may be an impractical length.)

good news: they're easier to keep track of. bad (better?) news: they end up getting all tangled up in each other. biting, licking, pawing. all whines and yips and soft little growls. they don't get into trouble, but you do end up with two very excited puppies on your hands. though they seem more than content to take care of themselves.. maybe you should leave them to it..

I think about these subby boys often, both playing with them and them playing together so this was an absolutely perfect thot. I hope this makes up for giving you angsty feelings 💕

CW: includes mentions of dry humping, slight cum play, voyeurism if you squint, just two collared pups being needy really.

NSFW below the cut 🔞 Minors DNI.

You see how tightly they’ve wound themselves around each other, a tangle of limbs and longing that begs to be unraveled—yet you don’t move. You simply watch, transfixed, as teeth graze skin and tongues trace paths of heat. Their bodies press together, desperate and shameless, rolling in rhythm until finally you see it; Folio pinning Noah beneath him.

That should’ve been the moment you stepped in and pulled them apart—especially since you’ve never seen them act like this before. Sure, they’ve roughhoused, play fought, but nothing like this. And honestly, you can’t even recall a time Folio ever came out on top—literally. But now, he’s straddling Noah, thighs bracketing his hips, wearing a smug grin like he’s won something. And Noah… Noah’s not protesting. The sounds slipping from his lips aren’t annoyed or demanding Folio get off, they’re needy.

You know your boys and the sounds they make, the ones they usually make just for you. But right now, it’s Noah who’s whining, desperate and needy for Folio. And Folio? He holds all the power in this moment, using it shamelessly as he presses their hips together, grinding their bulges in a tantalizingly torturous rhythm.

Even if they had noticed you were there, you doubt it would’ve made a difference, not with the way Noah’s eyes glaze over so quickly, or how Folio starts rutting against him like something feral with need. It’s messy, raw, and desperate—the kind of need they usually direct at you, clawing for just a taste of pleasure. But now, they’re seeking it from each other, and you can’t look away. You’re spellbound, watching as Folio plays with Noah, the way he submits so easily, so willingly. Especially when the smaller of the two sinks his teeth into Noah’s throat, suckling at the tender spot like he’s marking him, staking his claim the same way they’ve both felt you claim them.

Noah is completely undone by it all, the sounds spilling from him raw and almost animalistic. His hips lift, chasing friction, desperate for more, their bulges straining visibly against the fabric between them. They could touch, could undress each other if they wanted, but for a fleeting moment, they both glance your way, eyes silently pleading, as if waiting for your permission to go further. And really, who are you to deny them?

You nod, giving them the silent approval they seem to crave, but it’s not enough. So, you rise from your seat and sink to the floor beside them, kneeling. You reach out deliberately slow, as if helping them undress might somehow quell the hunger burning between them, might bring an end to their yearning for each other.

By the time you return to your seat, they haven’t wasted a second—they’re already lost in each other, too far gone for anything beyond desperate grinding. Folio’s ass fits snug against Noah’s cock, already slick with precum, while his own shaft drags across Noah’s stomach. You watch them move together in a frantic rhythm, all hands and mouths, their sounds rising and falling—muffled one moment, loud the next, depending on where their lips land.

It’s Noah who unravels first, too overwhelmed to hold back, spilling in thick, shuddering ropes beneath Folio. He twitches, hips jerking as Folio grinds down harder, like he’s trying to take it inside instead of just feeling it smear against him. But that’s all it takes and Folio’s right behind him, coming apart with a gasp, his release streaking across Noah’s chest and stomach in messy, claiming lines.

You’d think they’d stop now, that they’d finally burned off whatever need had driven them to this, but they don’t. Even with the awkward angle caused by their new clip, they keep going, and you can’t bring yourself to unclip it. Not now. You watch as Folio leans down, attempting to lick his own mess from Noah’s stomach—just enough to taste. And that taste seems to be all it takes for their mouths to find each other again, lips crashing together in a messy, eager kiss. A muffled hum escapes Noah, one of clear approval, as he deepens the kiss, clinging to Folio’s tongue like it’s the most delicious thing he’s ever tasted. And honestly, you can’t argue—they’re both utterly delectable.

[raileurta]

The sparkeater!human designs are such good body language inspo. I could definitely see an irritated “messenger” flicking their spiky tail like a cat as a threat, or any of them just wrapping themselves up in their wings to “loaf” on their favourite bot (said bot would probably be panicked as hell if their loaf spot was just a little too close to their chassis).

I like to think that the option for organic food is a major component towards self control compared to cybertronian spark eaters, so now the bots are just memorising all the drive thru’s in town specifically to avoid them getting cravings lol

It’d also be a fun idea that whenever they do start craving a spark they form a habit of chewing on metal to mimic the action of breaking past someone’s chassis to get to a spark without actually hunting a bot down. This is also a good indicator for when you gotta start taking them to get burgers or something before Miko actually tries to slip away and catch a con off guard. (Maybe other behaviours act as indicators too! like switching from nose smelling to tongue smelling because they’re subconsciously trying to track).

I can also imagine the cons also trying to get scary dog privileges like the bots, but their plan just backfires and they choose to let their sparkeater!human escape (because otherwise they’d be trapped with a sparkeater!human who is fully aggro at the cons for kidnapping them) which is how unicron gets the first sparkeater to find him in years. (Rip random vehicon no.420 used to create the sparkeater!human).

As for the thirteen aspects of chaos, the main one would be that everything can always happen once. Maybe not twice, maybe not regularly, but it will always happen once. I think freedom would be one of the more positive aspects of chaos. Order has rules. Typically they’re good rules that are understandable, but there are some pointless rules and bad rules too.

If I’m ever like….being annoying with these infodumps please tell me lol, I don’t wanna be too intrusive or anything.

Unless I state otherwise everyone should assume any creature I make is cat-coded. So I'm definitely seeing the vision here.

I'm imagining Raf un-intentionally making Ratchet extremely nervous because he liked laying on his chassis. He totally didn't realize what he was doing but once he did he was very apologetic. He now sleeps in Ratchet's neck crook. Miko on the other hand doesn't have this problem as she's the type of cat person to sleep on your face. Bulkhead doesn't need to breathe so he's not in danger of suffocating and plus he finds this really cute.

Every autobot now has “emergency snacks” on them just in case. There's also now a small kitchen in the human area packed full with lots of food. The kids can't really complain as they love all the free food but they do feel slightly guilty. The autobots would soothe them of any concerns they have; this for their comfort and everyone’s safety.

I'm just picturing Miko chewing up the railings in the base and Ratchet getting mad at her for it. 😂 Some of the other signs of them needing food could be nibbling on their hands, looking at a bot’s chest a little too long, pacing, and flicking out their tongues a lot. They do have tons of metal ball things in the base to help with this. Fowler has also given them lots of money to help with the food bill. The autobots could have and maybe theoretically already did hack easily into some big businesses to get their human money; they do appreciate the gesture however.

Since Miko now has wings it's basically impossible to keep her from the ground bridge and or running off so they have decided to get her one of those backpack leashes. She is very annoyed by this but it has been extremely successful so they aren't getting rid of it.

I think they did this with Jack. Megatron being Megatron wanted to use one of the autobots’ “pets” for emotional damage, he was completely convinced he could manipulate Jack to their side.

That obviously doesn't happen.

They had to force feed him a spark and being the decent person he is was very mad and disgusted by this. He escapes the prison they had kept him in then proceeds to terrorize the whole ship. The part of Megatron's mind that hadn't been totally corroded by dark energon was aware enough to know how fucked of this situation this was. He has Soundwave ground bridge him into a volcano which happened to be the one full of dark energon. Jack somehow manages not to be melted but he was blasted by tons of dark energon radiation. Once he passed out from the various severe burns he had gotten Jack and Unicron meet in his dreams.

“Creation. Once chosen by the last discipline of prime, now I shall take you for myself.” Unicorn says as he looms over Jack. The devourer had desired the “pink one” but this human shall work as well.

Jack once again being a decent person he is doesn't want to be involved in any of this. He knows how evil Unicron is (he's getting better but Jack doesn't know that) so he obviously refuses. Unicron doesn't care if Jack wants it or not so Jack becomes a messenger. He would represent the freedom that's in chaos. It's deliciously ironic as he's sort of a mini Optimus, the mech who is the poster child of freedom.

Trust me you're not being annoying. I love getting long asks like this, it gives me life.

Edit: Forgot to add this was beta read by @a-non-ymouswriter

[imnez-daydreams]

monic you are feeding me so well its insane. not only is there so much quality content but the fact you can finish these fics the same day blows me away. and yesss a reader who is just as dependant and obsessed as dex !! love to see it.

"he adores that you’re clingy. never complains. never rolls his eyes. in fact, the more you need him, the calmer he feels. finally, someone who wants him like that. who’s just as intense. neither of you go anywhere alone unless it’s absolutely necessary. if you could, you’d share one nervous system. always touching — pinkies hooked, shoulders pressed, legs tangled."

having a partner just as clingy, as obsessed, as dependant would definitely be everything desires. to have that need reciprocated. to know he wouldnt be abandoned, because his lover is just as (down) bad as him. i could definitely see how it would bring a sort of serenity to dex.

you panic when he leaves. even if he says it’s nothing big, even if it’s just a quick job. you cling to him at the door, voice cracking as you whisper “what if you don’t come back?” — dex melts. completely. cups your face in both hands, presses your forehead to his and says “hey. i’m coming back. i always come back to you.”

grr dex being all soft when he sees the effects he has on reader. how his lover cant go a second without him either. how their world revolves around him too.

the second he’s home he’s dropping everything at the door, walking straight to you like he’s been starving. wraps his arms around you and mumbles, “missed you so bad. i’m sorry, i’m here now. i’m not going anywhere baby, i’ve got you.” you’re curled up on the couch in his hoodie, cheeks blotchy from crying, and he’s just standing there staring at you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever seen. like, he thinks you’re so adorable when you need him. “gonna make it up to you,” he whispers, running his fingers through your hair while you cling to him. “wont go anywhere without you. won’t even go to the bathroom without you, swear to god.”

i need him !! i crave him !! dex would sooo feed into reader's unhealthy dependency. he sees it as him being wanted, being needed. he thinks its normal and healthy. his lover being unable to function or live without him would be music to his ears.

if you say “i thought you were gonna die,” he gets so soft. kisses the corner of your eye, strokes your cheek with the back of his hand and says, “you really love me that much, huh?” like he’s shy about it.

:"(( dex being all mushy when reader is worried. he probably becomes even more careful when he goes on jobs, makes sure he comes home in one piece to his lover. gets irritated when his work drags out or if he gets injured. not because of what it does to him but what it would do to his lover ugwim ?

he thinks it’s so cute when you get possessive too. like if you cling to his sleeve when someone flirts with him, he leans in and kisses you right there, smiling against your mouth.

rahhhh. dex would beam if his lover got possessive and controlling in public. feels on cloud 9 when his lover stakes their claim when people get too touch or stare too much.

he talks to you through his earpiece. “you still there, baby?” / “mhm.” / “talk to me. tell me what you’re gonna make me for dinner. i just wanna hear your voice.” and if you do stay home, he calls during the job. on the job. literally ducking behind cover like “hey, yeah, just wanted to say i miss you. i’ll be home soon, okay?” - - que him throwing a rock at matts forehead without even looking. when he comes back, he doesn’t even take off his boots before grabbing your face and kissing you breathless. muttering “you okay? did you cry? i missed you.” (part of him secretly likes it when you cry over him.)

so cute. also dex keeping up with the talking while yeeting smth at matt im crying LOL. i can imagine matt hearing the convo n being like "?? is he .. is he srsly chatting with them during our fight ??"

he wants the mess. wants the tears. wants the clinginess. it makes him feel safe. it makes him feel real. desired. if you ever try to apologize for needing too much he cuts you off with a kiss. “you’re exactly what i’ve always wanted.”

exactlyyy !! it makes dex feel wanted and needed and ensures him that they wont leave and reject his true self.

dex lets you trace his scars when you’re anxious, over and over. even the ones he usually hides. you do it like it’s sacred. like every inch of him deserves love. when he can’t breathe, you ask him to trace your spine, your jaw, your hands. it calms him every time.

wish we got to see dex's spinal scar :"( tracing his scar while in bed cuddled with him ... i need him !!

he loves being watched. like when he’s doing something totally mundane — loading a gun, brushing his teeth, pacing — and he notices you looking at him like you’re obsessed. it short-circuits him a little. he tries to act normal, but it makes his skin burn in a good way.

he's so !! i love the visual of these big scary men getting all soft and mushy just for their lover. over the most small romantic things too hehe.

thank you monic for writing dex and responding to asks so frequently too !! im so spoiled for choice with your blog muaks muaks <33

hiii angel!! i was wondering of you'd do something for dex and reader who has severe attachment and abandonment issues? i love love love your work sm!! <33

ben poindexter x attachment/abandonment!issues reader. 𝜗𝜚 headcanon’s

r e q u e s t e d ♡

cw ᝰ .ᐟ co dependency ,, toxic relationship probably? idk my heart shaped glasses are on ,, gender neutral reader ,, it’s dex so .. yah

DEX knows that kind of fear. the kind that makes your chest ache when someone takes too long to reply. the kind that whispers they’re leaving. so when you get quiet and distant and paranoid, he doesn’t take it personal. doesn’t get mad when you ask for reassurance three times in ten minutes — just pulls you into his arms and says it again: i’m not leaving. i’m right here.

he literally doesn’t know how to process being wanted this much. this is probably one of the most ideal scenarios out there for him.

emotional dependency. if one of you is upset, you can’t focus on anything until the other is calmed down.

dex lets you kiss his pulse when he’s scared. he won’t say it out loud, but it grounds him — to feel your lips where his heart beats. to know someone wants him alive. you let him kiss your wrist in return.

he lets you cling. he needs it too, if he’s being honest. lets you tangle your limbs around him like a lifeline. lets you fall asleep to the sound of his heartbeat, steady and real and not going anywhere.

the relationship isn’t about space, it’s about closeness. constant closeness. suffocatingly sweet, terrifyingly intense closeness.

you joke about being codependent and he nods like it’s a compliment. like, yeah? obviously.

you’ve both made it a habit to over-reassure each other when you talk about friends or exes. like, you’ll say “she’s nice, but she’s not you. no one makes me feel like you do.” dex’ll say “he’s cool, but you’re mine.” and it never sounds forced. it sounds like medicine.

you’ve both had full-blown meltdowns over someone going to the store without saying goodbye. the smallest silence, the smallest gap in communication triggers that deep, clawing fear: they left. they didn’t think it mattered.

both have habits to constantly reassure each other you're still chosen. dex will tap your thigh three times — his silent code for i love you, i'm here, i’m not leaving. you squeeze his hand in return — i know, i feel it, don’t stop.

he sends voice notes when he knows you’re spiraling. tells you exactly what he’s doing, exactly when he’ll be home. never ghosts, never disappears. he knows what that does to someone.

lets you repeat yourself. lets you doubt. lets you cry. he gets it — how love feels like something that could vanish if you breathe wrong. he lets you see him anxious, too. the tapping, the pacing, the tension in his jaw. not to make you feel guilty — but so you know you’re not alone. you don’t scare him. he’d rather have you panicked and clinging to him than not have you at all.

it’s terrifying how much he loves you. he needs you like air, like sleep, like the pills he forgets to take when he's too busy watching your location update on his phone. he never calls it stalking. he calls it making sure you’re okay. calls it looking out for you. calls it love.

he adores that you’re clingy. never complains. never rolls his eyes. in fact, the more you need him, the calmer he feels. finally, someone who wants him like that. who’s just as intense. neither of you go anywhere alone unless it’s absolutely necessary. if you could, you’d share one nervous system. always touching — pinkies hooked, shoulders pressed, legs tangled.

both of you panic when the other doesn’t answer the phone right away. he’s texting “where are you? are you okay?” while you're calling back in a frenzy thinking he got hurt.

falling asleep on top of him. always. his chest, his lap, draped across his body like a weighted blanket. he’d stop breathing before he’d ask you to move.

you panic when he leaves. even if he says it’s nothing big, even if it’s just a quick job. you cling to him at the door, voice cracking as you whisper “what if you don’t come back?” — dex melts. completely. cups your face in both hands, presses your forehead to his and says “hey. i’m coming back. i always come back to you.”

he leaves behind a hoodie that smells like him. a voicemail saying “i love you” just in case. his location’s always on. he double checks the locks before he goes. triple checks if you’re crying.

the second he’s home he’s dropping everything at the door, walking straight to you like he’s been starving. wraps his arms around you and mumbles, “missed you so bad. i’m sorry, i’m here now. i’m not going anywhere baby, i’ve got you.” you’re curled up on the couch in his hoodie, cheeks blotchy from crying, and he’s just standing there staring at you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever seen. like, he thinks you’re so adorable when you need him. “gonna make it up to you,” he whispers, running his fingers through your hair while you cling to him. “wont go anywhere without you. won’t even go to the bathroom without you, swear to god.”

and he doesn’t. for the next 24 hours he’s glued to your side, follows you around the house like a puppy. lays on top of you like a weighted blanket, kisses every inch of your face until you start laughing through the tears.

you’re in his lap while he eats. in his lap while he watches tv. he literally can’t function unless you’re physically touching him. one hand on your thigh, arm slung around your shoulder, pinkies linked — something.

if you say “i thought you were gonna die,” he gets so soft. kisses the corner of your eye, strokes your cheek with the back of his hand and says, “you really love me that much, huh?” like he’s shy about it.

he thinks it’s so cute when you get possessive too. like if you cling to his sleeve when someone flirts with him, he leans in and kisses you right there, smiling against your mouth.

you both have those breakdowns where it’s not even words, just shaking and holding each other like it’s the only thing keeping your hearts beating. and every time he promises it again. even if he already said it twenty times that day. “i’m not going anywhere. i couldn’t even if i wanted to. you’ve got me forever.”

one time he tried to leave in the middle of the night for something “quick.” didn’t want to wake you. but you did wake up — reached out, found the bed empty, and by the time he was at the door, you were sobbing in the hallway. he immediately dropped his bag, walked back to you with the most heartbroken look on his face. cupped your cheeks, thumbs brushing your tears away. you clung to him so tight he just sank to the floor with you, held you there until the sun came up. whispered over and over, “shhh. i’m not mad. you’re allowed to need me. i love it when you need me.”

he started letting you tag along after that. even if it’s just waiting in the car. even if you’re not doing anything. he’d rather see your worried face through the windshield than not see you at all.

he talks to you through his earpiece. “you still there, baby?” / “mhm.” / “talk to me. tell me what you’re gonna make me for dinner. i just wanna hear your voice.” and if you do stay home, he calls during the job. on the job. literally ducking behind cover like “hey, yeah, just wanted to say i miss you. i’ll be home soon, okay?” - - que him throwing a rock at matts forehead without even looking. when he comes back, he doesn’t even take off his boots before grabbing your face and kissing you breathless. muttering “you okay? did you cry? i missed you.” (part of him secretly likes it when you cry over him.)

he’ll cancel plans to stay in bed with you. has zero problem being irresponsible if it means holding you through a panic attack or a clingy spiral.

absolutely calls you pet names when you’re anxious. “sweetheart,” “angel,” “my baby.” says them soft and slow, like a lullaby, until you settle in his arms.

he wants the mess. wants the tears. wants the clinginess. it makes him feel safe. it makes him feel real. desired. if you ever try to apologize for needing too much he cuts you off with a kiss. “you’re exactly what i’ve always wanted.”

if you ever pull back, even just a little — even for a second — he goes absolutely wild. not in a “calm down” kind of way. in a “no, no, no” kind of way, like you’re slipping through his fingers. the moment you don’t immediately reach for him, his chest tightens, his heart rate picks up. “what’s wrong? don’t you want me?”

if you stop needing him for a second, even in a non-desperate, non-needy way, he can’t breathe. he panics. he feels his whole world shattering. like you’re getting ready to leave him. your clinginess feeds him. he knows you care. if you even accidentally pull away or seem like you’re trying to give him some space, he’s on you within seconds. wrapping his arms around you like you’re the only thing keeping him from falling apart. he cracks when you show signs of independence. he thinks it’s a sign you’re going to disappear.

his mind works overtime, spiraling into the idea that if you don’t cling to him, if you don’t hold him like you’re terrified of losing him — then you will leave him.

starts to feel resentful of anything that takes you away from him. if you hang out with friends, if you don’t text him back immediately, if you want time for yourself, it all feels like a slow rejection.

will whine or get genuinely upset if you don’t show enough physical affection. even if he’s the one who’s too clingy, he’ll act like you’ve abandoned him just for pulling away for a minute.

he doesn’t like when you act like you’ve got it together. when you try to be strong without him. it makes him feel like you don’t need him anymore, like he’s invisible. “i thought you needed me. i thought i was the one you couldn’t live without.”

obsessive, compulsive tracking. you go to the store? he needs to know when you’re leaving, when you’re back, what you bought. stalker tendencies. if you leave for a moment, if you go out alone — he’ll follow. just to make sure you’re not leaving him or finding someone else.

he listens to you so obediently. whatever you say goes. if you tell him to stay close, he doesn’t question it. if you tell him to sit down, he’ll drop whatever he’s doing and sit at your feet.

he’ll drop everything for you. his work, his hobbies, his interests — none of it matters if you need him.

both of you feed into each other’s worst fears: being abandoned, being alone. you make excuses for each other, let each other get away with anything just to avoid the uncomfortable idea of ever losing the other.

he enjoys knowing that you're so wrapped up in him, that when you feel abandoned, it’s almost as if the world is crumbling. he doesn’t want to be cruel, but he can’t help the rush it gives him knowing you’ll always look to him first for validation, for connection.

dex knows exactly how to get under your skin when you're struggling with your abandonment issues. when you try to shut him out emotionally, he’s the one to make you feel like it’s impossible to be without him. the more you get lost in your own head, the more he thrives on being your constant. when your insecurities flare up he doesn’t give you space; he pulls you in closer, touches you in ways that ground you. dex loves that you fall apart when he isn’t there. when you shut down or spiral into your own head, he sees it as proof that you can’t exist without him.

when you catch him spiraling, getting quiet, withdrawn, convinced you’re gonna leave - you drop everything to hold him. he clings to your shirt and hides his face in your neck like a kid. he never had that kind of comfort growing up, and now he craves it from you. only you.

when either of you even jokes about leaving, the other shuts it down immediately. it’s not funny. not even a little. you both get too in your heads about it, replaying it for hours after, paranoid it wasn’t a joke at all.

you both feed off each other’s clinginess. if one of you starts it — handsy, needy, whispering you can’t sleep without them — the other doubles it, tenfold. suddenly you're locked in each other’s arms like the world’s ending and only this moment exists.

keeps one of your things with him at all times. could be a hoodie, a piece of jewelry, even a chapstick you used once. he doesn’t tell you, but when he’s losing it, he holds it like it’s the only thing keeping him grounded. when you find it and realize he’s been carrying it around? you start doing it too.

neither of you knows how to fight without the deep-rooted panic that this will be the one that ends it. dex raises his voice once, and your heart drops into your stomach. you go quiet and his hands are already in his hair, begging under his breath — “don’t shut down. don’t leave.”

when one of you leaves the room for more than ten minutes without saying where you’re going, the other’s already pacing. it’s ridiculous. dex once came back from a shower to find you curled up on the floor thinking he bailed. now he always announces where he’s going. even if it’s just the kitchen.

when one of you is away for too long, you both lose sleep. it’s not just missing each other. it’s panic. dex gets snappy and withdrawn, you get dramatic and anxious. the reunion is always intense. too many emotions, too much relief.

he doesn’t just get protective. he gets viciously protective when you talk about past relationships, past abandonments. he hates thinking about you being hurt before him. loving someone before him.

sometimes dex gets so overwhelmed by how much he loves you that he just shuts down. goes quiet. curls up against you and buries his face in your stomach, you play with his hair until he comes back.

you both hate sleeping without the other now. you try to be normal about it, but you wake up nauseous. dex stares at the door like you might walk in. even one night apart leaves you both off balance. you sleep facing each other a lot. turning your back feels like a statement, and neither of you could survive misinterpreting that in the dark.

he picks up on your micro-expressions instantly. your blink patterns, how you fidget when you’re upset, how your smile twitches when you’re scared. he watches you like a survival manual. you do the same to him — he calls it creepy as a joke, but he melts every time.

dex starts fights on purpose when he’s scared you’re pulling away. just to make sure you care.

your phone backgrounds are each other. not even cute aesthetic photos — full-on, raw, vulnerable pictures.

you both keep little mementos from each other. you write notes to each other constantly. on mirrors, on receipts, on the backs of your hands. he has every post-it note you’ve ever written. you keep a receipt from a gas station because he held your hand in the parking lot and told you he’d never let go. you keep them like relics. like insurance against loneliness.

when one of you gets triggered or panicky, the other instinctively lowers their voice, softens their movements, goes small. you both know what it’s like to be too scared to ask for comfort.

every time one of you has a nightmare, the other doesn’t ask what it was. not unless you want to say it. instead, the rule is: water, forehead kiss, wrap around each other until your breathing syncs. the night resets when you find each other again.

there’s a rule: never leave the house angry. ever. if you fight, you sit on the floor, back to back, and you breathe. five minutes. ten. until the tension melts.

you keep a shared notebook for when the feelings are too big. you write letters to each other in it, especially on hard days. sometimes dex scribbles “i love you even when you’re quiet.” and leaves it on your pillow. you write back: “i love you when you’re angry. i know why you get that way.”

dex lets you trace his scars when you’re anxious, over and over. even the ones he usually hides. you do it like it’s sacred. like every inch of him deserves love. when he can’t breathe, you ask him to trace your spine, your jaw, your hands. it calms him every time.

dex keeps a note in his phone called “what to do when they’re hurting.” it’s just little things you’ve said helped. your favourite snacks. songs that pull you back. the way you like your hair touched.

you both panic when the other one sleeps too still. like — is that still breathing? dex has absolutely leaned over you, whispered “baby?” until you stirred just slightly. and you’ve done the same, barely touching his chest with your fingers to feel it rise.

marks you up when he’s jealous. hickeys, scratches, bite marks in places only he’ll see. for control — for comfort, for proof. you do the same. a little too hard with your nails. a kiss with too much teeth.

he absolutely malfunctions when you compliment him too earnestly. like, he can take teasing or playful flattery, but if you look at him dead serious and say something he stares at you like you’ve knocked the wind out of him.

he doesn’t know how to handle the way you hover when he’s injured or just tired. like bringing him water, checking his face for any sign of discomfort, asking “need anything?” every ten minutes. he’s never had someone be gentle with him like that, it completely unravels him.

becomes totally silent when you trace his features. like, drag your fingers over his cheekbones, his brow, his jaw — just looking at him like he’s something sacred. he leans into your palm every time.

dex absolutely gets flustered when you praise him in front of people. casual stuff — “he’s so good at that,” or “he takes care of me better than anyone ever has.”

he loves being watched. like when he’s doing something totally mundane — loading a gun, brushing his teeth, pacing — and he notices you looking at him like you’re obsessed. it short-circuits him a little. he tries to act normal, but it makes his skin burn in a good way.

once got really quiet after you hugged him from behind and just held him there. no words. no tension. just arms around his waist, your cheek against his back.

when he’s being moody or short, you don’t fight back. you just cup his jaw, tilt his face toward yours, and say “talk to me.” it undoes him completely. you never use that voice unless you’re pulling the hurt out of him like a splinter.

he is always waiting to be “too much” for you. too cold. too quiet. too angry.

he can always tell when you’re spiraling in your head, even if you don’t say a word. maybe you’re fidgeting with your hands, chewing your lip, or just not making eye contact. he’ll pull you into his space, drape a heavy arm around your shoulders, and rest his head on top of yours. you don’t need to explain; he already knows. sometimes, he’ll just leave a kiss on your temple and wait, and that’s all it takes for you to calm down a little.

when you’re feeling overwhelmed in public, maybe at a party or in a crowded place, his first instinct is to reach for your hand, fingers squeezing just enough to pull you back to him. the simple pressure of his hand is enough to remind you that no matter how loud the world is, he’s here, and he won’t let you go.

when you’re on the verge of a panic attack he instantly knows. his reaction is immediate, he doesn’t try to talk you down with logic (because he knows that doesn’t work), instead, he pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly, keeping you in his chest until you’re calm. when it’s over, he doesn’t leave you, even for a second. he’ll make sure you feel safe.

sometimes, when your abandonment issues hit, you get scared of being left alone — whether it’s him going out or just being in a different room. dex, noticing this, will make sure to be around you constantly, but in a way that doesn’t overwhelm you. if he has to leave for a bit, he’ll casually say, “i’m going to grab coffee. wanna come?” or, if you’re staying in, he’ll just hang out in the same space as you, whether it’s in the living room or the kitchen.

started 4.27.2025. finished 4.27.2025.

( masterlist. )

©️ monicfever 2025

[thedeadstoryteller1]

𝒮𝓃𝒾𝒻𝒻𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒫𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓈𝓊𝓇𝑒 - 𝒞𝒶𝓁𝑒𝒷 𝓍 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇 𝙿𝚃 𝟸- 𝒩𝒮𝐹𝒲

𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: A tense, charged encounter unfolds when Caleb is caught by you after indulging in an intimate moment of self-exploration involving your underwear. The confrontation is raw, filled with guilt, desire, and a deep need to be honest. The two of you navigate the emotions, expressing desires that were previously hidden, leading to a passionate and intense physical connection.

𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚜: Multiple Orgasm, Breeding, Rough Sex, Forbidden Attraction, Love Confession.

𝙰𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚜𝚝: _peachybunny on X

𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 2171

A shadow.

“Oh no.”

His stomach drops. That shadow isn’t just anyone. It’s you.

You’re home. Early.

You hadn’t said you’d be back so soon. Maybe you forgot something. Maybe you didn’t want to leave things the way they ended this morning. But whatever the reason, you’re standing just outside his door—and he knows there’s no way you didn’t hear at least something.

His throat goes dry. His hands are still trembling. He doesn’t dare move, doesn’t breathe. Maybe if he stays silent, you’ll go. Maybe you didn’t see anything. Maybe you’ll convince yourself the noises were just a movie. Or music. Or—

Knock.

A soft one. Gentle. Hesitant.

“Caleb?” Your voice—so quiet, but not angry. Just confused. Concerned. Like you’re unsure of what you think you heard.

He doesn’t respond.

Another pause. Then—

“You okay?”

His chest tightens. He wants to disappear. The shame, the lust, the twisted craving he just gave into—it crashes over him all over again.

“Y-Yeah. Just… taking a nap.” His voice cracks. Weak.

You wait a beat.

“Alright… I just forgot my badge for work.” Another pause. “I’ll be out in a second.”

Footsteps.

He listens to every one like a countdown. The front door opens. Then closes.

Silence.

He sinks to the floor, hands in his hair, heart pounding all over again—not from desire this time, but from fear. And something worse.

Guilt.

Because the truth is… he wants you to know.

He wants you to see how far gone he is for you.

And that scares him more than anything.

The apartment is quiet when you walk in.

Too quiet.

You take off your shoes, hang up your bag, and glance down the hallway. Caleb’s door is closed. No music. No light coming from underneath. Just silence.

Your eyes linger on the door.

You heard him. Every moan, every whimper, your name falling from his lips like a prayer. And the guilt in his voice when he lied… it hit something in you. Something dangerous.

You walk to the kitchen, grab a glass of water, trying to act normal. But your heart is racing.

Enough pretending.

You march down the hallway and knock—this time with intention.

“Caleb.” No response. “Open the door.”

Nothing.

You press your palm to the wood. “Please.”

A click. Slowly, the door opens. He stands there, hoodie on, hair messy, eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights. Guilty. Embarrassed. Scared.

“I—”

“Don’t lie to me again.” Your voice cuts through the room.

He swallows hard. His mouth opens, but nothing comes out.

“I heard everything, Caleb.” You step inside. The door clicks shut behind you. His body tenses, like he’s bracing for impact. “I know what you did. I know what you used.”

His cheeks turn red. “I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“No.” You walk closer, heart pounding in your chest. “You wanted me to hear. You didn’t lock your door. You didn’t even try to hide it.”

His breath catches. “That’s not true.”

“Then why did you say my name?” you ask softly. “Why did you use my underwear, Caleb?”

He flinches.

“You didn’t just want to jerk off.” Your voice lowers. “You wanted me to catch you. You wanted me to see what I do to you.”

Silence. Heavy. Suffocating.

“I… I can’t stop thinking about you,” he finally whispers. “I know it’s wrong. I know I fucked up. But I’m losing my mind, (Y/N). You’re everywhere. Your scent. Your voice. Your fucking panties—” His voice breaks, thick with desperation. “I want you so fucking bad it hurts.”

You’re so close now. Inches apart.

“Then show me.” You reach for the hem of your shirt, slowly pulling it over your head.

His breath hitches.

“This time, I want to see everything.”

Your shirt hits the floor with a soft thud. Caleb stares like he’s forgotten how to breathe. His gaze travels from your chest—bare except for the lacy black bra hugging your curves—to your lips, parted just slightly as you watch him.

You take a step forward. Then another. Until there’s no space left between you.

“Touch me,” you whisper, your voice soft but commanding. “You’ve been doing it in secret for so long. Let’s see if you can handle the real thing.”

His hands hover, trembling. He wants you—desperately—but fear roots him in place.

You guide his fingers to your waist. “I want this too, Caleb. I’ve wanted this.”

That’s all it takes.

He surges forward, capturing your lips in a kiss so deep, so full of repressed hunger, it knocks the air right out of your lungs. His hands grip your hips like you might vanish, his body pressed so tightly to yours you can feel the hard line of his cock—already straining against his sweatpants.

You moan into his mouth, and he growls—growls—in response. “You don’t know how many times I’ve imagined this,” he whispers against your lips.

“Then stop imagining,” you breathe, fingers slipping under the hem of his hoodie and tugging it upward. “Make it real.”

He tears it off. You reach for the waistband of his sweatpants, and he shudders when your fingers brush over his erection.

“Fuck, (Y/N)...”

It takes everything in him to not cum at the sensation of your fingertips. Fighting the urge to mess himself up right then and there.  

“Is this what you were using my panties for?” you murmur, hand now palming him over the fabric. His hips buck into your touch helplessly. “Fucking yourself while moaning my name like a filthy little perv?”

His head drops against your shoulder, breath ragged. “Yes. God, yes.”

“Good.” You push him back gently, guiding him to the bed. “Because now you’re going to fuck me.”

He sits, eyes glued to you as you strip slowly—every inch of skin revealed like a gift he never thought he’d receive. When you slide your panties down your legs and toss them in his lap, his jaw clenches.

“Keep them.” Your voice is a tease, your smirk sinful. “That way you won’t have to steal them next time.”

He groans, reaching for you. You straddle him, your dripping core grinding against his cock through his sweatpants, both of you breathless.

“I need you,” you whisper in his ear. “I want you inside me, Caleb.”

He lifts his hips, pushing the pants down just enough to free himself, his cock flushed and so hard it twitches at the sight of your slick folds above it.

“Condom?” he pants, but you shake your head.

“Not tonight.” You reach down and line him up with your entrance. “I want to feel all of you.”

With a slow, deliberate motion, you sink down onto him—and it’s heaven. His hands grip your thighs, and his head falls back with a strangled moan.

“Fuck, you’re so tight. So warm.”

You roll your hips, watching him unravel beneath you.

“Tell me how many times you thought about this,” you whisper, picking up your pace.

“Too many,” he gasps. “Every night. Every time you smiled at me. Every time I smelled your perfume. I wanted you. God, I wanted this.”

Your nails rake down his chest as you ride him harder, your own moans matching his.

“I’m gonna cum,” you gasp.

“Me too. Inside. I want to cum inside you, princess—”

Your bodies tense, then shatter together—pure, messy pleasure washing over both of you like a storm. His hands hold you tight as he fills you, his mouth on your shoulder, your name breaking from his lips like a confession.

After, you collapse on top of him, both of you slick with sweat and satisfaction.

The air is quiet again.

Only this time, it’s not tense.

It’s heavy with something else.

Something real.

Your body is still trembling from your release when Caleb flips you over in one sudden, fluid motion. You gasp, your back hitting the mattress as he hovers over you—eyes dark, lips swollen, chest rising and falling with raw, animalistic need.

“We’re not done.” His voice is low. Dangerous. Almost a growl.

You don’t get a chance to respond. His mouth crashes into yours again, hands already roaming—possessive, hungry, like he wants to memorize every inch of your body all over again.

He kisses down your throat, your chest, your stomach—leaving wet, open-mouthed kisses along the way. When he reaches between your legs, his tongue swipes up your slick folds, and you whimper.

“You taste like sin,” he murmurs into your skin, gripping your thighs and spreading you wide. “And I’m gonna worship you like the filthy little goddess you are.”

You moan as his mouth returns to your pussy, tongue teasing your clit while two fingers slide inside you, curling just right.

Your back arches. “Caleb—fuck—”

He doesn’t stop.

He devours you. Sucks your clit, fucks you with his fingers, moaning into your heat like a man possessed. Your thighs shake, hips twitching up into his face. You’re already close again.

And he knows.

“Cum for me,” he demands against your pussy, voice rough. “Cum on my fucking tongue.”

You shatter. Loud. Desperate. Legs trembling as the orgasm hits you like a wave crashing on the shore. He doesn't stop until you're crying out, pushing at his head, overstimulated.

But he’s not done.

He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, looking up at you like a man who's just tasted paradise.

Then he grabs your wrists and pins them above your head.

“Now it’s my turn again.”

He pushes inside you in one hard, deep thrust—and you scream.

“That’s it, baby. You feel that?” His mouth is right at your ear now, breath hot. “That’s how deep I need to be. I want to ruin you for anyone else.”

He pounds into you—harder, deeper, each stroke making your whole body bounce beneath him. The bed creaks. The headboard hits the wall. His rhythm is brutal. Precise. Perfect.

“Say it,” he pants. “Say you’re mine.”

“I’m yours—fuck, Caleb—I’m yours!”

That’s all he needs.

He lets go of your wrists, one hand grabbing your throat—not tight, just enough pressure to make your breath hitch. His other hand slides down your body, rubbing circles over your swollen clit.

“You gonna cum again for me, princess?”

You nod frantically, lost in the pleasure, completely undone beneath him.

“Good.” His eyes bore into yours. “Then you’re gonna take every fucking drop when I fill you again.”

You scream as the orgasm hits, and he follows with a deep, guttural moan, his cock twitching as he cums inside you again—harder this time. So much cum, you feel it dripping out as he slows, hips still rolling into you gently.

He collapses beside you, pulling you into his arms, breath still uneven.

“We’re never going back from this,” he murmurs, voice hoarse.

You smile lazily, chest still heaving. “Good.”

The room is quiet now. Only the soft hum of the ceiling fan and your mingled breathing fills the space.

You’re curled against Caleb’s chest, his arm slung protectively around your waist, skin still warm from everything you’d just done. His fingers trace slow circles against your back, grounding himself—grounding you.

He finally breaks the silence.

“I was scared.” His voice is raw. Vulnerable. Not the cocky, composed Fleet Colonel. Just… Caleb.

You glance up at him, your cheek still resting against his chest. “Of what?”

He swallows hard. You can feel the tension in his body like a tightly wound wire finally beginning to loosen.

“Of wanting you this much.” He exhales shakily. “Of screwing everything up by being some perv who can’t stop stealing your underwear and jerking off to the thought of you.”

You blink, then snort softly. He looks down, startled, until he sees your smirk.

“You are a perv, Caleb.”

He groans, throwing his head back into the pillow. “God, I know—”

“But,” you cut him off gently, reaching up to cup his cheek, “you’re my perv. And I’ve been just as bad.”

His brow lifts slightly. “What do you mean?”

You shrug with a little grin. “You think I didn’t notice how good your ass looks in those tight flight suits? Or how I’d fake interest in your cooking just to hear you moan when you taste something you like?”

He laughs, soft and disbelieving. “So this whole time we’ve just been… dancing around each other like idiots?”

You nod. “Idiots in love.”

His smile fades, replaced by something deeper. Softer. He brushes your hair behind your ear and presses a kiss to your forehead.

“I love you.” No hesitation. No fear. Just truth.

You blink, heart stuttering. But you don’t panic. You don’t freeze. Because you feel it too.

“I love you, Caleb.” You lean up and kiss him, slow and tender. There’s no heat in it this time—just warmth. Affection. Everything.

He wraps both arms around you and pulls you into his chest like he’s afraid you might disappear.

“No more secrets?” he murmurs.

“No more panties going missing?” you tease.

He chuckles, kissing your temple. “No promises.”

My lovely ferrymen ! Thank you so much for the support in this short series. I hope you guys liked the ending. We all know MC wants to jump his bones lol a special thank you to @cordidy @april-likes-smut @mcdepressed290 @hwangintakswifey @twilightsmissingfur @rukii-afterdark @quacker180 @lumieresdreams @nanaminsmuse @tofufairy for enjoying the first part. I hope you love this part as well. As always don't forget to show some love and support. The new banner also dropped today for us in the American Server .. IM SO NOT OKAY ..

With Angsty Love,

~The Deadstory Teller~

[annaswrites00]

Revolving Door

fc43 x reader

(1.0k)

Summary - Inspired by Tate McRae’s Revolving Door… warning - slightly suggestive content

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡

The city lights buzzed beneath you, blurred through the balcony glass like a watercolor smear.

You weren’t even supposed to be here.

You’d sworn the last time was the last time.

He had told her too many times “I care about you… but I can’t give you more than this.”

Yet there you were—half-dressed in one of Franco’s oversized T-shirts and your underwear, legs curled up on his suite’s balcony chair, heart pounding like it had something to say.

Inside, he was moving around in the kitchen. You heard the clink of a glass, the low hum of his voice humming something under his breath. Calm. Unbothered.

You hated that about him. Hated how easily he came back. How easily you let him in.

Your phone buzzed. A text from your best friend lit the screen:

“Tell me you didn’t go back to him.”

You locked it without replying.

Of course you went back to him.

Franco walked out onto the balcony with two mugs. One for you. One for him. He handed you the cup, then dropped into the chair across from you, ankle resting on his knee, hair still damp from the shower. He looked like the kind of mistake you didn’t just regret—you craved.

“So are we gonna talk about it?” he asked casually, like this wasn’t déjà vu. That accent of his wrapped around her like always—warm, close, too much.

You stared at him. “Talk about what?”

He gave you a look. “You disappear for a month. Block me. Tell your friends I’m a bad habit—your words, not mine—and then show up at my door in the middle of the night with your bags and a look that says ‘fuck me or fight with me.’”

You took a sip of your drink. “So pick one.”

He grinned, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I already did, didn’t I?”

Silence hung between you for a beat too long.

“You know I’m not good for you,” Franco said, voice low now. Honest. Too honest.

“I know,” you whispered.

You thought moving around would help. Thought blocking his number, deleting your photos, scrubbing him from your life like a bad stain would make you feel clean again. But one call—one call—and it was like everything unraveled. Again.

“You never stay gone,” he said, leaning forward, elbows on knees. “Why do you keep coming back?”

You laughed, soft and bitter. “Every time, I swear I want you less… but somehow, I end up needing you more.”

He didn’t say anything.

Didn’t have to.

Because when he pulled you into his lap, your body remembered all the reasons you kept coming back.

He leaned forward, elbows on his knees, staring at you like he already knew the truth.

Because when his mouth met yours, it was the same fire—hot, chaotic, all-consuming.

The kind of fire you tell yourself you can control.

The kind that burns your house down anyway.

His hands slid up the back of your thighs, slow and unhurried, like he had all the time in the world to remind your body of every soft spot he’d ever memorized. You could feel the tension between you—thick, magnetic, familiar. Your hips shifted without thinking, grinding down just enough to make him suck in a sharp breath against your mouth.

“Still tastes like trouble,” he murmured, lips brushing your jaw.

You bit his bottom lip in return, just hard enough to make him smirk.

Clothes didn’t need to come off. Not yet. Not here.

Because he knew how to wreck you with your clothes on. Knew just how to press—just how to pull—until you were arching into him, whispering curses into his neck, chasing the high you swore you were done with.

One of his hands dipped beneath the waistband of your panties and traced the skin there like he had every right. Like your body still belonged to him even after all the distance.

Maybe it always had.

“Say it,” he breathed against your throat, voice gravel and tension. “Say you missed me.”

You didn’t say anything.

You just rocked your hips down harder.

His grip tightened on your waist.

And when he groaned—low, needy, the sound of someone falling right back into addiction—you knew it was over.

You were already his again.

Later, when his arm was slung around your waist and the room was quiet except for the low hum of a race replay on TV, he kissed the top of your shoulder and whispered, “We’re bad at this.”

You nodded, eyes on the screen. “But we’re worse apart.”

And in the morning, you’d probably leave again. Say it was the last time. Swear you meant it.

But you’d be back.

Because love, lust, and longing weren’t linear.

They spun, over and over again.

Just like a revolving door.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚ ༘˚⋆𐙚｡

Thanks for reading!!!

𐙚⋆°🦢.⋆ᥫ᭡

[jenosonlywife23]

Soft Jeno thoughts (request from anon) — imagine these are the things running through his mind when he’s with you:

💭 "How did I get so lucky?" Every time you smile at him — really smile — Jeno feels it hit him all over again. Like the first time. He’ll just stare at you, heart squeezing painfully in his chest, thinking he must have done something really, really good in a past life to deserve you.

💭 "I wanna take care of her forever." Whether it’s making sure you ate, that you have a warm jacket on, or that you're safe walking home — Jeno is the type to quietly, naturally, always look after you. Not because he thinks you need him to — but because he wants to. It’s how he shows love.

💭 "She’s my whole world." When you laugh too hard at something stupid, or you trip and catch yourself and then look around all embarrassed — those tiny, unfiltered moments? Jeno falls even deeper. You’re not just someone he loves — you are his definition of happiness.

💭 "I hope she always feels loved." He worries sometimes. Late at night, when you’re asleep curled up against him, he’ll brush your hair back and wonder if he’s showing it enough. Telling you enough. That you’re everything to him. So he holds you a little tighter, hoping you feel it even if he doesn’t have the words.

💭 "I want a future with her." Sometimes when you're talking about something random — a vacation you want to take, a dream you have — Jeno finds himself thinking about rings, about homes with light-filled kitchens, about a dog you pick out together. And it feels so natural, like there’s no if, just when.

💭 "No one else compares." Other people come and go, but you’re it for him. No one else makes him laugh the way you do, no one else makes the world feel so light. He’s not interested in looking around. His heart already chose you.

💭 "She’s the best part of my day." Even on the busiest, most exhausting days — even when he feels like collapsing — knowing he gets to come home to you, hear your voice, hug you, kiss you... that's what pulls him through everything. You’re his safe place. His soft landing. His favorite feeling.

💌

: Soft Jeno thoughts when he misses you— like he’s apart from you for a while (work, tour, schedules), and he’s just full of aching love for you.

💭 "I wonder if she's eaten today." It’s the first thing he thinks about when he wakes up in a different city. Even before checking his own schedule, he’s texting you — "Good morning, baby. Did you eat yet?" He just wants to know you’re taking care of yourself, even when he can’t be there to nag you in person.

💭 "She probably looks so pretty right now." It hits him at random. Walking down a hotel hallway, sitting in the back of a van, brushing his teeth. He’ll stop whatever he’s doing and smile to himself, picturing you — messy bun, comfy clothes, maybe your nose a little scrunched up in concentration. God, he misses seeing you just exist.

💭 "I wish I could hug her." Jeno loves hugs — but only your hugs. When he's tired, overwhelmed, or just existing, he craves the feeling of you pressing your face into his chest, your arms wrapped around him. That kind of comfort no one else could ever give.

💭 "I hope she knows I’m thinking about her." Even if he’s too busy to call or text properly, he finds little ways to show it — sending you pictures of things that remind him of you, a quick selfie with a peace sign captioned "for you :)," a voice note saying "miss you, love you, be back soon." Small things, but so full of heart.

💭 "I can't wait to come home to her." He doesn’t care if it’s just sitting in silence together, if it’s eating takeout on the floor, if it’s falling asleep on the couch mid-conversation — home isn’t a place to Jeno. It’s you.

💭 "She makes everything better." Bad day? He imagines your hand in his. Your voice telling him it’s okay. Your laugh pulling him out of his own head. You're the background music in his mind, the person who turns noise into something beautiful.

💭 "Maybe I should buy her something." He’s strolling through an airport shop when he sees a stuffed animal, or a cute keychain, or a hoodie that looks just like something you’d love. He immediately grabs it. Not because it’s expensive or big — but because he wants you to have little pieces of him while he’s away.

💭 "She’s gonna tease me for being soft, huh." He can already hear your teasing voice when he sends you a text that says something like "I miss you so bad it’s not even funny." But he doesn't care. He wants you to know he’s soft for you. Always will be.

💭 "When I see her, I’m not letting go." When his flight finally lands and he sees you standing there — sleepy, maybe, or bundled up in a jacket — he doesn’t even bother trying to play it cool. He drops everything and wraps you up in his arms, heart pounding against yours like it never skipped a beat. "I missed you so much, baby. So much."

[swiiivet-screamathon]

Addendum: What does the Sage of Truth skin tell us about Shadow Milk?

Hi, yeah, noticed a uh, mistake, of mine lmao

In the og post I mentioned that I wasn't certain what the Sage was about, as it surely wasnt the past and was unlikely to be the future

but turns out thats quite obviously his silhouette right there

So assuming that this isnt some fabrication from Elder Faerie and is indeed proper canon, that's a flashback, not a reconstruction

That the Sage of Truth is Canonically Pre-Beast Shadow Milk, we can then more confidently start making assumptions and deductions with that groundwork

Now I still hold my ground from the original post that they are very very similar to each other, and having picked at his character thoroughly through my own writings I can decently confidently say that the Character of Smilk has never changed, the only thing Beast-ifying did for him was change his Worldview

He is still playful "Well, well, well! Are we ready for some tomfoolery?" "Now now, I'm not like those other academics." "Time for some real DRAMA!" "Ugh, come on! Why do you refuse enlightenment?!" "Liar, liar, pants on fire!" "Aright, let's put your knowledge to the test!" "A Fount of Knowldge. A-who could that be?!"

He is still cheeky, condescending at times "Think! What if all yoru life is a lie?" "Do I really need to spell out everything? Come on, think!" "Oh no, you got tricked? (Blows raspberry) Well, TOO BAD!" "Why does everyone try so hard to hide their ignorance? Tsk!" "If I told you I'm a liar, would that be a lie...?"

He still holds his beliefs with confidence "The Cookie of Truth? That's-a-me!" "Hope is nothing else but a cheap trick of the mind!" "The Truth is born in dispute." "We all live for some spicy drama, amirite?" "Admitting your ignorance is the first steps towards the Truth!" "A tiny droplet of deceit can bring down a might empire." "The key to the greatest theorem is often... pretty small!" "Truth is... the world is built upon lies." "I can always find an answer. Even if it means "no answer"." "A blade's edge is what seperates Truth from Deceit." "The more you know, the less you know!" "The arts, academia, technology, magic... Truth exists everywhere!" "The Truth reveals itself through creation!" "Hogwash, rubbish, BOLONEY! I will not tolerate any!" "See the Truth, and you shall know all!"

He still performs theatrics "Let the show BEGIN!" "Let the show begin!" "Why the looooong face?" "Tis I, your humble jester, here to brighten up your mood!" (Done through sing-song) "The arts, academia, technology, magic... Truth exists everywhere!" "Well, well, well! Are we ready for some tomfoolery?" "A WOLF!!! HELP! A WOLF! ... He he..."

He still likes showing off and being center of attention, people finding him specifically important and making himself important "Excuse me? I'm so sorry to disturb you... But I'm still THE MAIN CHARACTER here!" "There you are! Time for some magic!" "Welcome, folks! Ready for some giggles?" "Who's hungry for knowledge? (Oh!) Come 'ere!" "Whoah, PAL! You don't wanna get on my BAD side!" "Ooooh, are you proposing a debate? Alright, but no backsies!" "Fool me once? Crumbling to see you try!" "Think I'm wrong? Very well, present your case!" "You want in on a scrumptious little secret, mm?" "Ah, the origins of magic! Buckle up, you're in for a ride!" "Raise the curtains! The show begins...!"

There's also a belief that these desires are natural that I didn't mention last time "Ever told a lie? Then we're pals!" "Craving for the Truth is as natural as simply existing!"

And a very curious part to me, is that he indulged in creative works, like, at all, "Art can heal the soul!" "Playwright, poet, actor, and sage! All is MOI!"

I'll elaborate on that in a minute

Like at no point does any of Sage's dialogue ever come across as something that'd be out of character for Smilk, although he might not say those exact words in that order, he's not speaking with the intonation or intention of someone like Cacao and he speaks his words. As a person he has not fundamentally changed. At most he's become more theatrical and a little less... demeaning? Not holding others to a standard. Because unlike Sage where he wanted others to try to value the Truth and was disappointed when they wouldn't-- Smilk is confident that you are a liar, that everyone is a liar, so has no reason to be disappointed when you tell the truth because the moment you spoke a lie, something he believes everyone to have done, then you are permanently labelled a liar, you will almost certainly already have his mark before you ever met. But that's not exactly a character upheaval by any means.

The only thing we're really missing from Sage is the loneliness and anger that riddles Smilk, but given he doesn't demonstrate it either in the overworld its hard to make any judgements on how Sage feels, if he's either joyous to have followers or if he feels isolated for having no one on his level intellectually, if he's really just a chill guy now and doesn't ever get angry or if he does have specific triggers that send him into violent outbursts and we just happen to never encounter them-- any comment beyond "they seem to differ in this aspect" would just be assuming, not deducing.

So, what other information can we garner if so far the only difference we've found is that one believes in the Truth and the other Deceit?

Well we can start with a pretty basic exercise, their differences in behaviour physically.

With Smilk the more physically intensive the task the more upset he is about doing it, with the easier jobs he seems considerably more bored. The one time he stands on solid ground is when he's hammering, where he exerts the absolute least amount of effort possible with the tiniest tool out of all the ones he uses. The only one he enjoys is the one he can be theatrical with, demonstrating to at least some capacity, (though canonicity questionable given this is on kingdom grounds and not in the story) that he's willing to do things for others if it means he gets to do what he wants. He'll absolute shill for you if it means he can go hogwild w it lol.

Sage comparatively has normal sized tools and puts in reasonable effort when doing all the tasks, seeming either neutrally pleasant with most of the intensive activities whilst enjoying the easier ones considerably. He also stands on solid ground for almost half the tasks, implying less of a need to rely on his flying abilities compared to Smilk. Given his only unique expression being calm that also happens to mirror Smilk's perfectly (Leaning back, cross-legged, leaning on the other arm) is when watering flowers. It thus becomes possible to deduce that he might find watering flowers relaxing, possibly even in the present day, and that there's another reason that has nothing to do with watering of why he's seemingly not interested in the activity in present day.

It also brings up an interesting question, if we know that Sage is Smilk in the past, canon and all, then who is the other guy? The guy I claimed to be the Fount of Knowledge?

And I would still argue that to be the Fount, and I would still argue that Sage is not the Fount.

A key part of their differences is Sage's lack of hair eyes, the only eye iconography in their actual design is on their hat and staff, neither of which do a whole lot of blinking in any capacity. And given that the hat has both closed and open eyes I don't think it's too wild to say that the connections between him and eyes are superficial at best, nothing beyond most of our own assumptions when it comes to truth and lies, that you keep your eyes open to see the truth of the world and close them to hide from the truth, so him being the representative of knowledge would of course have both facets available to him, not that much deeper than that.

There are a couple things we can automatically deduce from the very little we know of the Fount:

He Had at some point swapped from White to Black clothes. The whiteness of his hair had lessened and it's now its 3 pronged state, it still has the galaxy pattern that the sage does and the gradient seems to stay darker for longer. He still has the forehead symbol. He at some point swapped the Souljam's placement off his chest and onto his staff. Eye iconography is stronger but has not yet adorned his hair. The elements are important somehow as they show up in the bg. During this time he still had followers but they one by one 'ate the apple' and abandoned Fount's teachings to embrace lying. His staff is still a key.

The only thing I feel confident in deducing is that this is just before the beast-ening, this is what he looked like the final days before he too succumbed and chose the path of the beast. And although less confident I feel confident enough to deduce that something actionable happened between Sage & Fount, and I think whatever that was is the cause of the hair split, the cause of the eye iconography becoming more prevalent and most likely the cause of everyone abandoning his teachings; though if I try to argue that further we leave analysis and enter headcanon so lol.

And a final piece to note, is that they both have access to the other-realm, shown in their rabbit idle, although Sage has some gold streaks in theirs. Which although not inherently notable as I'm like, a little confident that it's just the Souljam's externalized land, "bigger on the inside blue box rock", I do find it mildly notable though because either he got it from the witches, implying that such a power would in some capacity help them out when it comes to managing the world, creation and/or his ability for knowledge-- Or as a fresh cookie he decided to gain that power through other means somehow, how he would do that I'm not particularly confident, but I don't think that detail should be overlooked at all.

Getting back to thing I mentioned earlier, the strangeness of Sage participating in the arts, is from a thing I noticed that made me actually write this thing, its been sitting in my drafts for ages lol.

And that's a connection between all the beasts' understanding of their own virtue and something that consistently trips them up about it, something I had accidentally laid the groundwork for.

Sbice from day one was heralded for his combat, change has always since he popped out of the oven been defined by slaughter, which as I pointed out in part 1 is not the only way change exists. Moving to a new place is change, having a child is change, even just tiny things like hanging up a new picture up on the wall is change, none of these things have anything at all to do with death but are all still changes in someone's life. But Sbice never got that aspect of his virtue.

Mystic granted wishes for everyone in the name of volition, or, well, not everyone, not those who were cruel and evil. Volition still encapsulates those people, they still enact upon their own volition to be terrible, awful people. Someone chose to assault a guy, another chose to shoot a stranger, a third chose to torture an innocent; these things all still fall under volition. But Mystic couldn't handle that.

And my hypothesis as to why he's the Sage of Truth is that he believed knowledge was synonymous with the truth, that lying wasn't knowledge-- but it is. If I tell you the world is shaped like a bowl of spaghetti you now know that information, its not the truth but you still know that I told you that. Truth is also not objective in any way, time is relative, gravity is relative, our perspectives are relative, our lives is relative, the truth will and does change depending on dozens and hundreds of factors. I could tell you that it is false and untrue if I say the statement "I am a cis man." but that is true for someone who's actually a cis man, someones truth is not everyones truth. Which is why his participation and respect for the arts is so interesting to me, because they are inherently a fabrication of truth, within the world of the art anything can be true, but it's almost never, ever true for the real world. Even stuff like auto-biographies or documentaries will inherently be skewed by the fact that you're just taking a portion of existence, a tiny sliver of it, that inherently removes infinite amount of context which is required to define 100% of the media as "true"-- But the type of art he consumes are stage plays, a medium that's inherently deceitful by a mile, because a lot of the time it asks the audience for things that aren't real, you apply your suspension of disbelief when watching a play. The actors say they're in a castle when really they're on an elevated wooden platform, there are no castles in the vicinity, and that king you're speaking to certainly has no royal credentials I'm aware of! So what gives? Is my hypothesis flawed and there is no problem Sage trips over? Not quite-- I think the case is that he's in the same boat as Mystic, knowledge is good! But not all knowledge. Theaters and Media in general are consensual lying, you go there expecting to be lied to, and those lies are often the whole appeal of going. But non consensual lies, which still fit under the definition of knowledge, thats no good-- We can also take the deductions backwards too, we know that Smilk believes that 'all lies work best with drops of truth in them' and 'truth can be dismantled and ruined if a single drop of deceit is inlaid', he believes that because that's the lesson he learnt as the Sage, that his truth wasn't good enough to stand on its own, that fact by itself isn't won't convince anyone ... Or, well, the reason why he learnt that lesson was because of other cookies, as they abandoned his teachings to pursue the sweetness of deceit, his truths stopped mattering, fewer and fewer cared about them anymore, they weren't as good as the lies that were told. He focused so hard on the importance of truth and fact with some indulgence in the arts that the rest of knowledge was neglected, leading cookies to search for that instead. One must accept all knowledge, but Truth is all that mattered to Sage.

There's not else a ton of note what I can tell, the bond story still isn't particularly relevant unless we really want to fanfic some "Pv has lived through the same cycle of history since the dawn of cookie-time" or an alternative "Pv is a standin for a real past figure without being the literal figure but smilk is the literal figure of smilk" but that's insane for an analysis who's trying to asses facts lmao

So given all the info that was presented in part 1 and now with this Sage information, what can that tell us about Smilk's Redemption possibilities?

It doesn't give us a ton to work off of, since redemption isn't a circle, it's very unlikely that a redeemed Smilk would just be Sage again, they'd probably look different from one another.

It does give the implication that the more gold accents Smilk gets the more "good" he is but shhh thats just patterns not deductions lmao.

What it does mean is that its incredibly likely that the lesson Smilk has to learn to be redeemed is the exact same lesson that Pv learnt, that both are important; you cannot abandon deceit and lies, it's a part of existence, being conscious and having autonomy-- plus his students and listeners abandoning him are proof that trying to abandon it once more will simply repeat history. But of course you cannot abandon the truth either, existing in a world without truth is impossible, its one of those ideas thats impossible to imagine, same as 'imagine nothing, no not blackness, actual nothing', facts are facts of existing, things just are, a rock will exist, space will exist, atoms will exist, those are all facts and truths of the everything. Although as discussed in the part 1 he absolutely hasn't at his core abandoned truth, in this very addendum I explained that he recognizes the importance of truth in lies, someone who has denounced truth completely wouldn't believe such a thing, so given he's clearly swimmin in the deceit sauce and believes in the value of truth what gives? What he has to learn is why the truth is so important to fight for to begin w, lies are comforting and sweet, they alleviate your fears and solve your problems, what does the truth have in it that makes it good, that makes it worthwhile? Because without an answer to that question it automatically makes deceit seem like the better choice, there's reason to fall for it, and none for the truth. He will never recover if he doesn't figure out the answer.

And yk what, since we're at the end of the post I'll indulge a bit and go on a wild tangent-- If I'm comparing them anyways why not go on a wild tangent and demonstrate the reasoning as to why I always draw Smilk w disembodied limbs-- It has literally nothing to do w Smilk redemption but if we're going deep dive into Sage then why not lmao

Though first lets tackle the easier out of the two, demonstrating is his neckless-ness

Don't get scared about his stretched head I took 10 tries to get a clear enough screenshot I'm not tryin again lmao

If simply seeing him plop his head off isn't proof enough for you, it's a magic trick or somethin, heads not really detached at all times-- well then technically I can't prove that outright, but I can say it'd be strange if that was a spell he was pulling off every single second he lives, leading me to question whether the difference is semantics at that point anyways lol

Given what we know of cookies who show their body/head connections clearly, both old and new cookies, it is shown that the head tends to sink in just a little bit into the body, having the shoulders come out from the theoretical lower jaw of the cookies

And to me I just don't see that like, at all on Smilk's outfit, if I were to imagine what he'd look like taking off the ruff I don't think the shoulders would go that high, because w/o the souljam being in the way we'd be able to see his entire head, it doesn't go that far down; I see picture 1. And especially if we believe picture 2 to be correct and it does indeed connect, meaning the shoulders have to raise up through the thickness of the ruff, I believe it would then make complete sense if when Smilk detached his head we would see his body through the neck hole, it has to be big enough to fit his entire fat neck after all. But it doesn't, it just shows roughly where the neck hole should be, but not only does it not show the body in any capacity it's also by far too deep to fit his neck in, that hole depth is for someone with a neck as tall as people, not a species like cookies where saying they have a neck at all is dubious at best.

Hopefully no doubts here? I don't think this should have to be headcanon at all or even somethin I have to prove, but if ya wanna analyse ya gotta back your stances up.

Now then, what about those hands?

(Me lookin through my sources finding him do a hairflick might be the best thing to come out of this addendum lmao)

What I could find this is every single instance where we should be able to very clearly see the arms got into the ruff, and there's 2 things I need to prove.

That the ruff is indeed hollow to the same capacity the the neck ruff is, where we would actually see the arms at all in the first place, and that it isn't simply a stylistic choice.

We'll get to the second part of that after, because the first part is trickier to say for certain to me. All of the images except for 2 shows a reasonable amount of "That hand is not connected to an arm, I should be seeing that arm if it was" to me, but nothing really definitive as proof of much of anything. The two in question are these ones.

(The right image is control, if we should view anything as a "definitive" design it should probably be that one)

Top left looks like in any reasonable sane universe there should absolutely be an arm poking through to some capacity, his hand is too far away from the ruff to all the explanation that the ruff is simply hiding the arm like it's possible to argue in most of the other images.

The bottom left one however is, strange-- It is art from the game so dismissing it outright feels incorrect to do, but that's still not his design? His arm ruffs don't curve inwards like a cone like that, it can be up in the air what that slightly darker blue tone is inside the ruff but that tone definitively does exist like, at all lol, so why it wasn't drawn in that instance is alluding me.

If that's not conclusive enough, which fair, we can tackle the second question; perhaps it is just stylization after all, so how do they treat similar scenarios? Smilk ain't the only sleeved character who holds something after all.

This is what I can tell every cookie that applies for our question

Cookies that have long enough sleeves and big enough objects to hide the arm in the first place that are holding objects with their hands wrapped behind the object, and it seems that there are a lot of "there r no rules" here.

Match, Pearl & Pomegranate being the least helpful as they don't have revealed hands at all

Alchemy, Clover, Velvet, Snow & Sapphire all have their arms/hand connections visible, although harder to spot on some than others

Cacao, Choco, Onion & Herb have objects that are too big to be able to see anything anyways

Cotton can be hard to tell but every time she puts her lamp down she shows that she has her arm out at all times

I misinterpreted Prune's design there, he doesn't wear sleeves he wears gloves, so duh do we get several perspectives of his arms showing, they're not hidden in any way after all lol-- I also misinterpreted Yam's design, it looked like it was a hollow void the same as Smilk's but it seems that it was just an attempt and really bad failure at perspective, that's supposed to be a glove/gauntlet but because of the perspective fail it now looks like it's much much wider than it actually is

Mint has an even worse case of disembodied hand than Smilk does but it does very much seem to be a strange perspective issue rather than it missing completely

Our closest matches imo are Frost Queen, Affogato, Cream Puff, Rebel, Vampire & Pure Vanilla, Pvs already being disqualified because his hand shape is drawn differently, unlike the half circle the others get he gets this slanted raindrop shape, implying the arm perfectly adequately. If we look at even a single piece of art for them though, and uh

Whoops, I can see some arms in those arts, although rebel looks like he got a third elbow lmao-- all duds there

Or wait, hold on, Vampire isn't there... What's that supposed to mean op?

Well apparently it means that Vampire has like, 4 pieces of official art and exactly 0 opportunities in any of his sprites to show off his arms in any manner, he always holds his glass the very exact same way or his hand is just barely peeking out from the sleeve. It never looks obviously wrong like it does w Smilk, it doesn't ever give the impression that beneath his sleeves we would find a lack of wrists and other extremities-- Mguy just needs an event sometime soon ig lol

So given all of our examples for how CRK handles this type of character design, unless Vampire wants to disprove us somehow I don't think there's a strong enough argument to say this is within their m/o, and that Smilk should in some capacity have their arms shown

And finally, why I brought this up in the Sage section at all, is because of 2 points, one regarding to each limb lol

The first is what made me think of it in the first place, that Sage replaced the juggle animation with a new one, so now the only evidence to the disconnected head is the same body proportion issue that was mentioned previously, but making any conclusions from that would be jumping too large of a hurdle I think-- though I wouldn't call anyone out if they came to the conclusion that if asked Sage couldn't juggle his head because it's thoroughly attatched

For me though the hands feel more compelling

To me that looks incredibly obvious that it makes complete sense that Sage's hand continues under the sleeve, and the thing that's cutting it off is not a vague nebulous space but it's the lineart, the fact that the lineart color is the same color as the inside of the sleeve is what makes it look like it disappears prematurely but recolor the linart to be a distinct color and it will look like it makes complete sense

The closest angle we have with the same posed hand is that surprised one, that hand is not bent it is stretched out. The lineart of the ruff and the strange void thing are not the same color, those two things should be two distinct planes of the object, that hand should continue up to the lineart if there was an arm to connect to.

I rest my case ^^

And also for funsies the puppet looks like it has arms better than any present day Smilk's do lol

(warning the keep reading section is really really long -- also bestie logged into the pc vers of tumbrlr just so i could ensure i got this written out how i wanted lmao)

ok i recognize that this might be a contentious subject given how my for you page has been, so just like mini warning i am very fragile & scared so pls dont be too mean if you disagree w me here lol

but i just have to write about it in a fashion that like, anyone can read about it? the thoughts are holding me in a chokehold and i need to be let free so let me vent lmao

ever since i rejoined crk w the intent of dissecting its story i wanna see when they fix the gaping plot hole w white lily lmao i've been writing out my complaints & strange things i've noticed, but one of the things i wrote there is about this subject:

I think out of our current known beasts, Shadow Milk has the highest possibility of being redeemed.

i'll immediately mention that I recognize my bias, i like the guy, i think he a goofy feller who chews the scenery really really hard and is in love w his own voice cause he has so much charm in his way of speakin, so ofc that automatically has to be taken account when i write this up, but i make this claim from the facts i know of with reasonable assumptions based off the facts, or at least i am trying to-- if it's any assurance I also like handsome jack & springtrap but think redemption is off the table for them, this is not coming from "i want every character i like to be a good guy" i do genuinely think it's possible. i also very much know "i just wanna" is not a valid argument lmao-- also quick mention I haven't finished chap 3 of oddessy or the dragon book, so if im missin info you have to wait for an addendum lol

anyways, i think the easiest point is to mention the contrast between him & the other beasts, as to prove why he's the most likely I have to adequately demonstrate why i think the others arent as likely, and I think it will also be decent framework to the rest of my conclusions

the one I think has absolute negative chance of being redeemed is Burning Spice, because no part of him to me seems like he ever wanted to or presently want to be his original virtue. I genuinely think if he never had the virtue thrust upon him he would've never accepted it at all ever; he was one of the first cookies so he got the title of Change, not because he was particularly specially suited for it.

Even in his very own description it mentions he was hailed as a hero because of how much he fought, he has for all of his life only wanted to fight, and used the virtue as an excuse and justification for his actions from the very beginning, one that he sort of believed in to some extent, otherwise he would've never kept any civilization alive ever at all, but he wouldn't have been so gungho about combat for all of his life if he truly believed in change, one who did represent it would recognize that the cycle of life and death does not have to be perpetuated by violence or combat, nor does all change have to involve the death of another.

He also has his past the most secretive out of the 3, the only hint i noticed of his past displayed in the present day was the single mural that we saw the flashback through, which the only way we saw the flashback at all was through the souljam, meaning only his other half had ever the chance of learning what he was like back in the day and no one else. The only way you would even know that the mural is about the past is the 6 arms (since the rest of it depicts cookies burning up into ashes, Sheese describes it as looking like a carnage after all) which is something im not sure if present day sbice can do, but it also doesn't strike me as something the citizens would assume means he was originally a virtue either, it'd probably just be read as sbice being far more powerful than they think of him as.

I don't think he should've ever gotten the title of a virtue, I don't think if given the choice he would've accepted the virtue, and I don't think he ever 100% believed in the virtue and from day 1 has used it as an excuse to satiate his desires.

Speaking of his other half, i dont think there's any universe where Gheese would ever forgive him either, if she won't even forgive one of her best friends for something she shouldn't blame her for I'll try to not get hung up on lily too much sry lmao, required her paradise to fall to war and even then barely got convinced and that he physically mutilated her? There's no way she would ever look past Sbice's actions in a million years, which isn't a great habit to have if you want to redeem someone. So yeah, I think Sbice is off the table as possible candidates lol

Mystic is a different story from Sbice, and will probably end up being the second most likely, including the unreleased beasts.

I've got no idea how they're gonna make sloth into a villain, girlie who does nothin and can't bring themselves to do anythin at all doesn't really feel like someone who can cause much of a fight, and depending on the definition of sloth you're workin w you can attribute it to resting, which is important to any fighter. But especially since their original virtue is happiness I'm presuming sloth is going to be presented very similarly to Gheese's paradise, one w lavish existence, having all your needs met, drowning in fulfilment and no one has to struggle, because surely that leads to bliss-- which still doesn't make me read them as a villain to me, which yk, makes redeeming pretty pointless?

And mr Silence is uh, idk..? What the deal is? I don't read solidarity as a virtue or silence as a sin, i think tumblr knows more than most the benefit of silence actually lmao-- takin the quickest of googles to recheck my definition of solidarity ig its supposed to be unity? so like, teamwork? ig mby the more plain wording of the guy is virtue of Communication and then beast of Not Communicating, which ig I can see how that could make the girlie a villain if its done deliberately, which makes redemption I think at least a little less likely than Mystic but more likely than Sbice.

Anyways!! Tangent ahoy! Point is, I think Mystic is second most likely to be redeemed lmao

Both Smilk & Mystic has the same thing in common that makes me think that they're the likeliest to be redeemed: the continued belief in a 'good', non-beastly trait.

(I should preface that I saw Mystic's story as it was released, but I am rechecking through the logs just to make sure I'm not bein a blatant dumbass, but I might've missed somethin by skimming through the logs)

With Mystic though she doesn't have a ton of connection with Volition in the present day but she does have some-- compared to the past which is the inverse where she mostly had a connection w it but did waver, but only by a very slight amount, one that comes along with every idea of 'freedom': the dissonance between free action vs humanity/personhood. But in this situation unlike a lot of other examples its become her achilles heel. Some people's free will is to assault, murder, harass, maim, damage, rob, whatever else, and hell her (probably) supposed friend Sbice was most likely one of those people.

So what was the answer to deal with the people who were violent and cruel? She took their volition away, she wouldn't give them their wish, her method of displaying her virtue, completely going against it.

(if you want to argue that she did not choose to not grant their wishes but was instead physically unable because of her cocooning then she would still be making a choice to not fulfill her virtue for all cookies which was her goal, but i dont think that's that case anyways)

It's difficult to encapsulate how I believe she viewed her own virtue, I think she fully believed in the virtue in principle, the idea of free will is a good thing after all! Taking away people's free will is a bad thing! But the moment it had to be played out in practice it all fell apart for her, showing that she never really truly believed in it as a real concept along w its consequences, only the image of it, what she wanted it to be, not what it truly was

No, what Mystic wants is Cacao's virtue, Resolution, one of the earliest mentions what I can tell is Haetae pitting his & her resolution against each other, but it's something brought up time and time again, and something she displays over and over. It's something I saw about when the chapter was being released, she's really bad at the whole Apathy thing,

(I am running against the 30 image mark constantly, I have to trim this down, sorry lol, keep on reading to understand my formatting, also sorry if some of the order is incorrect I'm not double checking the chronological events of all these quotes beyond my first check before I had to remove the screenshots, I'm just trusting me from a couple hrs ago lol)

??? (Mystic): It is my purpose to protect Cookies with my unwavering willpower and lead them to Paradise. I enclosed myself in a cocoon for the sake of my followers. And yet the world seen from inside the cocoon was far from pure... Cookies putting their own green first, pushing and shoving to have their own wish fulfilled before anyone else...Witnessing this, my heart grew forlorn and empty. At first I believed this emptiness would crumble my dough, but my enclosed cocoon remained strong and intact throughout the ages. Time comes and goes as Cookies are baked and crumble once again... But I learned how to overcome time itself simply by being me. Just as I was one step away from becoming the Leavened One... Someone spread a false rumor that my cocoon was full of treasures. Mystic Flour Cookie: The cocoon was cut open with one slash of a sword. "Fake immortal," they said, just like you. ... What do you think of my story? Does it not make you feel... like everything is futile? No matter how strong your resolve is, no matter how hard you try, this world will never change. *** Mystic Flour Cookie: My soul jam, come to me. Return to your rightful owner. *** Mystic Flour Cookie: At last, I am complete. I can feel the force of Volition within. Mystic Flour Cookie: Return to nothing, as if you never existed in the first place. This is the world of perfect apathy... that I've been dreaming of. ***

she has desires/dreams of her own, hell she wants her souljam more than anything, the whole reason she was in the cocoon was for her people, one of the first things she says after bein released from the cocoon is a story where she reiterates her purpose & explains the reason she didn't kill herself was because of her resolution. the story itself is dumb as well, she concludes that everything is futile because, checks notes, some guys enacted upon their own volition? that story should be one that enforces your virtue not prove it doesn't work

bestie goes from "resolution? who's she? a worthless cause?" to "that resolution is mine actually" in like 2 sentences, she's a perpetually ideologically conflicted char

She explains a little bit as well in the beginning, how she came to the conclusion, one that once again doesn't go against her own virtue: that when one desire is met, you don't just cease to exist and will probably want more things ever in your life, which is the premise of volition? If you didn't have free will you wouldn't have the option to gain new desires, you couldn't achieve things you want w/o having the capacity and freedom to want, this whole ordeal is a part of the print, yet she takes it as a reason to believe everything is meaningless and nothing will change, revealing she's really lost the plot because she is looking insanely zoomed out lmao

as established later on, she sees every action as meaningless in the wake of infinity, but that would be more equatable as antithetical to volition, as the ability to make choices requires a timeframe, but it's not antithetical to apathy, as you can very much see infinity in an apathetic light but that is a choice you're making, ironically. You can see infinite as wonderous, as scary, as aspirational, as most emotions really-- personally i see infinity as worth fighting for, i think immortality is pretty neat, and frankly i dont think thats very apathetic of me lol

idk if you realized this mystic, but you're not asking for apathy *and* the removal of volition in any these sentiments, youre actually asking for complacency, which doesn't have to be antithetical to apathy but they're very close siblings, as you can be happy with what you have, ie not apathetic, and not want anything more, ie complacent, but because mystic doesn't realize any of this they act like apathy will solve the problem of bad people doing bad things, so will use the power of resolution to ensure that her idea of apathy, total death and later the acquisition of the souljam, will be enacted, because that's totally very apathetic of her /lh

Her belief in apathy is as strong as an emo teens belief in edgyness and dark eyeshadow, and has as much of a backbone as one of them. She doesn't truly fully believe in her apathy at all, no matter whatever she says otherwise, but she believes she has completely lost her belief in volition, even though she hasn't given all said previously. Apathy sounds like the closest answer to her loss in belief but the two ideas really have incredibly little relevance to each other in any intrinsic matter, the opposite of volition isn't anywhere close to apathy, in fact they aren't even antithetical, you can choose by your own will to be apathetic and not care, you can choose to lock yourself away, you can choose to value other things over emotion & desire-- all she is is a girlie who's pissed because bad guys exist and will use their free will to do bad things, thats it, it has nothing to do with apathy, she simply chose to see the world in that manner.

The only thing she does that's anywhere close to doing anything antithetical to volition is taking the people's choice away in living w her pale ailment, the victims didnt exactly choose to keep on living after all, but that seems more like a happy accident rather than something she would actually align with if she was truly Apathy, if she was apathy she would've just stayed in the cocoon, it doesn't matter what everyone else does, it doesn't matter what they think, it doesn't matter what i do, it doesn't matter if i live- a truly apathetic character couldnt bring themselves to act upon the idea that everyone should be as apathetic as themselves, because you would care then! it's very similar to my description of sloth, Apathy can't be a villain, so the way she's a villain is by being one of the most passionate and resolute people around whilst waving the flag around that she's totally apathetic guys trust me bro

also two rq mentions, firstly when mystic shows the kingdom w/o cacao she shows choco's subjects being devoted & choco choosing not only to be a leader but a good one at that & grieving his late father, she is truly incapable of imagining a person who's not driven by volition & resolution to some capacity, or at the very least if you want argue this is fabricated to specifically undermine cacao's resolution and not a depiction of what she thinks will realistically occur, she doesn't think apathy on its own is a convincing enough argument leading her to need to launder her ideology, which really is a great example of her believing it's inherent validity huh?-- and secondly that chippy didn't turn to futility or apathy when he got wooshed heh

(one thing im genuinely unsure about is how real these dustings are, they seem like they were just imagined up by mystic, but i forgor lol)

i've yapped way too long about someone who isnt smilk in a post about smilk lmao, but finally tldr, i believe she is a character who never commited to anything yet put her whole pussy into acting like she did lmao, she believed she was the virtue of volition yet folded when it actually displayed the reality, deciding to instead hold onto her idealized false version of it up to this day, and she claims to believe that she has achieved enlightenment and subsequently apathy yet cannot stop being resolute for 2 whole seconds lmao-- i don't think mystic has the capacity to return to being the virtue of volition, since she doesn't believe in it in a practical sense anyways and it'd be really really hard for them to justify why you should let ppl do assault, but I do think she can become a sister believer of resolution, she can't stop displaying her resolution through her conviction to apathy after all, no matter how much she insists otherwise. i also wouldnt be surprised if they gave instead a synonym, virtue of conviction or somethin heh

Even cacao realizes her, pity, her anxiety, her childishness, everything impossible to be whilst trying to be apathetic, she never succeeded in what she preached and it's blatantly obvious that's the case

feck, speaking of him, i should also talk about cacao shouldnt I? i'll try to be quick-- Cacao is not a man of incapability to forgive like Gheese, as long as you're not a threat to what he's resolute about he's generally fine, especially since he has also shown capacity of recognizing when he himself is in the wrong, it would for sure take a while and a third party would definitively be needed since i'm not sure if we've ever seen him change his mind w/o bein heavily pushed to do so, but in no way do I think w enough evidence that she means no harm would he not accept Mystic if she were to try to redeem herself, but she would probably have to do a lot to prove that to him before he would forgive and he'd watch from afar to see her actions

ok, finally, lmao, the smilk part, i'll try to make it longer than the mystic part so i dont feel like ive wasted your time w her /j who am i kidding all of this is a waste of time im an amateur in analysis and writing and also autistic idk any shit lol im just hopin im coherent and not inherently nonsensical

you might've noticed that as I wrote about the two previous beasts I've laid down the groundwork for some requirements, for features I believe are necessary for the possibility of redemption for any of these characters, which to speak plainly here:

They should have either elements of their previous virtue present in the current day or have the capacity to embark on the path of a new virtue.

Their belief in their beastly aspect should not be absolute and either be depicted as wavering, contradictory or partially believed in.

They should have the capacity to believe they are wrong and thus capable of learning to any degree.

The other half of their soul jam should not permanently reject them.

And uh, if you don't see where I'm going with this, yeah I think that is completely and unabashedly true for Smilk ^^ time to try to adequately prove it lol

Rightio then, how should I tackle this... have them all go down in order ig? or eh, i'll swap the last two, i think that makes it easier to explain, very well then

Coming back to this a little later this absolutely barely works lmao, I'm mostly just making a ton of sub categories that hopefully I can string into somethin coherent lmao, I'll try to make it sensible lol

... It seems I have reached the image limit....

Ok problem solving time, all quotes displayed like this are all quotes directly found from the game, I don't have the energy to source which chapter it is from as I haven't for any of the screenshots lol, but know that unless stated otherwise they are all found within the quest logs menu thing, hopefully thats a good enough middle ground, cause I have 0 energy to figure out how to work around the image limit, if there is a workaround-- I'm gonna reduce the redundant repetition of names since this text block doesnt have the same restrictions as the game does and to differentiate large walls of separate quotes the segment will end with a *** ... + when one of those separating lines of elipses occurs means some dialogue in the same section was skipped, as it's either filler or irrelevant to the point im making, i am trying to not source even more than i have to yk lol

As a final reminder before entering the Smilk section, ofc he fuckin lies, he lies a lot lmao, but a big part of what I'm going to be saying is that he does not lie all the time. I will sometimes put things into sections you might disagree w their authenticity in regards of truthful sentiments, if he is clearly lying about a subject that the quote is being categorized within, then the category probably isn't about assuming absolute truth is coming out of his face hole, it probably matters to the grander themes and messaging of the entire story lol.

They should have either elements of their previous virtue present in the current day or have the capacity to embark on the path of a new virtue.

Light of Truth...?: I govern all Truth and Deceit of this world. What you mistake for the power of Truth is but a cute tiny droplet in my limitless ocean of Knowledge. So! What am I?! Need another hint? I thought you would've solved my little riddle by now! Pure Vanilla Cookie: The one who governs all Truth and Deceit... The Master of All Knowledge...? Light of Truth...?: RING DING DING! *** Silverbell Cookie: It's all a lie! There's no way that His Majesty protected the seal for such selfish reasons... Wizard Cookie: Shadow Milk Cookie is the Cookie of Deceit. Of course he's full of lies! White Lily Cookie: He's not simply making up obvious lies, but weaving in threads of truth to his story... *** Fortune Teller Cookie: ... The lord of this tower is a Cookie all-knowing. Space and time intertwine in a myriad of reflections here. For in the realm of Knowledge, there is more than one truth. *** Shadow Milk Cookie: Ahem, rise and shine! Daydreaming again? Do understand, I'm not mad. I'm simply disappointed. For you fail to see the truth. THIS is not an other-realm. ... It's time to accept the truth you like so much, Pure Vanilla Cookie. *** Shadow Milk Cookie: The Truth... How do I put it? It has a rather ugly countenance. Some Cookies prefer the safety of a sweet lie, afraid to stick their head outside, to the cold reality. Others? They find a twisted pleasure in weaving deceit for their own benefit. I know exactly what you're thinking. BEEN THERE, so to speak! My boy, the universe once was but an open book to me. Time and space unfurled before my eyes. Truthless Recluse: Perhaps, it's not an easy task for those who haven't witnessed the majesty of Truth and Knowledge. *** Shadow Milk Cookie: Look at this fallen seeker of Truth. Your mind is like an open book!*** ??? (Sapph): The great Shadow Milk Cookie, Archmaster of all Knowledge and Deceit there is, played a genius stroke by leading our reckless foes right into his trap in the spire! ... And now, I invite you to sit back, relax, and forget about the boring notions of Truth and some such! Instead, join me tonight on our fantastical, magical journey...*** Shadow Milk Cookie: Ah, Cookies! They just love a good gossip, don't they? Something to gnaw on, truth or not. Black Sapphire Cookie: Excellently said, My Lord! A droplet of Truth in a concoction of Deceit works wonders! Soon, this world will kneel before you, Master Shadow Milk Cookie!*** Black Sapphire Cookie: Knowledge and Lies have existed since the very genesis of these lands. Master Shadow Milk Cookie's power is truly beyond all measure and comprehension! Shadow Milk Cookie: Lo and behold! I shall purge the darkness of the unknown and illuminate your future!

This point is the biggest reason why I thought he could ever have a redemption all along, because HE WON'T STOP TELLING US THIS IS THE CASE, he LOVES the truth, he LOVES knowledge, the only way to tell the truth is to know things, and the only way to lie is to also know things, a baby cannot lie, they don't know shit lol-- lying inherently and intrinsically is a distortion of knowledge automatically requiring his virtue to be a part of the equation, and smilk cannot shut up about how much he knows that to be true. He will preach the virtue of truth (this ones important dont gloss over it lol), he will choose to tell the truth, he will admit that he isn't lying, he will make his own truth. At no point did Sbice want abundance, and there was a single point where Mystic even admitted that she had a grain of volition within her and all other cases were accidental, but he will just. not. stop. mentioning. truth.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: I realized that my power and his... They are like two sides of the same Coin... What do I do? *** Light of Truth (Smilk): I am the Light of Truth. And the truth is... Your dreadful adversary and I. We might not be much different after all. One and the same... *** Pure Vanilla Cookie (Interspersed w Smilk): Truth and Deceit... Like two sides of the same Coin... Perhaps, those dreams are merely a trick to confuse me... A product of my power resonating to Shadow Milk Cookie's presence... ...!!! No, impossible!... Or is it?... Even so, he and I are different. Shadow Milk Cookie and I are different! And yet... that custodian's riddle... It was too easy... And this place... it feels oddly familiar. Ever since I gained my Soul Jam, I've come across so many questions without answer... I wonder... Did the Fount of Knowledge feel this too? All this doubt and confusion? Like I do? Pure Vanilla Cookie...?: All the roads I have ever taken... All the roads you have ever taken... They all lead to Him. Pure Vanilla Cookie: These are not my words! Once the Fount of Knowledge: You and I are bound... ... You will see.*** Pure Vanilla Cookie (Smilk): Knowledge, Deceit... Maybe they are not that different. ... Pure Vanilla Cookie...?: Oooh, looks like we have an expert in the audience! Shadow Milk Cookie: Very well, go ahead. Prove me wrong! *** Light of Truth...?: Why, you've said it yourself! We are like the two sides of the same coin! *** Shadow Milk Cookie: I know exactly what you're thinking. BEEN THERE, so to speak! My boy, the universe once was but an open book to me. Time and space unfurled before my eyes. You... You are merely following in my footsteps. ... Oh but it's inevitable. In the end, you will become... me! And it's gonna feel good!***

[That entire section lol ^] Gingerbrave: Phew! Pure Vnilla Cookie will play White! Shadow Milk Cookie: Huh? That doesn't seem right... Are you sure? Wizard Cookie: What?! That's cheating! Shadow Milk Cookie: Aren't we like two peas in a pod? I get that a lot! Heh. Sometimes it's hard to tell us apart! *** Truthless Recluse: I think I'm beginning to understand him. And... it fills me with fear and self-loathing.*** Shadow Milk Cookie: Oh, we are one and the same now! Meet the other Cookie of Deceit, Pure Vanilla Cookie!***

It is also repeatedly emphasized w PV & Smilk specifically, not any of the other beasts what i recall, that they are two sides of the same coin, unlike the other pairs who although are both representative of their respective virtue are incapable of existing with one another, these two are both aspects of knowledge and they need each others traits to exist as a whole, there can be apathy w/o resolution and there can be destruction w/o abundance, but there cannot be lies w/o truth and truth w/o lies is pretty antithetical to humanity, autonomy & consideration, which at least I think are decently important for ppl who, yk, give a shit at all, like pv lol. They both on separate instances deny it whenever it starts hitting just a smidge too close to home, but it's a theme that runs continuously throughout the entire story.

Shadow Milk Cookie: But then... a particularly wise Cookie, who had seen the truth of this world, appeared in his kingdom. Smart Cookie: And she said, "I've seen the truth of this world! It needs the strength of the Five Great Cookies to exist!" ***

I'm not sure if this is the best category to put it in, but since I mentioned the coin thing here I'll mention it here too, Smilk likes truth tellers and truth knowers, to at least some extent, someone who fervently believed otherwise I think would struggle to admit otherwise. I take that observation specifically off a video I saw a while ago, an acknowledgement of a strange behavior, that a conservative guy made a parody newshow of leftists based entirely on lying and struggled to stick to the bit, since the conservative doesnt believe trans ppl to be real and are just one gender pretending to be the other, you would then believe that the newshow that lies all the time would disagree and claim that they arent just pretending, but that would require for just a moment that the conservative guy has to say w his own words that trans ppl arent just pretending, and since the belief is so vehement that they are just pretending they cant for a second do what they believe to be lying and thus end up making the lying newsshow accidentally trans validation. Although I very much think Smilk to be physically capable of making such a lie, if he does indeed believe all these truthers to be foolish idiot morons, I don't think he could psychologically get himself to admit that.

And finally a little bit of a catchall of him generally displaying otherwise 'heroic' traits, stuff that could be compiled in that 'new' virtue, even if they are, ofc, twisted in some capacity, usually pretty heavily-- I'm well aware we're talkin about Smilk here dw this isnt me tellin me he's the good guy all along lmao

Shadow Milk Cookie: Shadow Milk Cookie couldn't forgive the foolish king for how unjustly he treated the Five Great Cookies! And so... He decided to dispose of the foolish Kinch and save his comrades! ***

Saving your friends and disposing of the villain is usually done by protagonists of all media, so why be a hypocrite for him?

Shadow Milk Cookie: Those False Heroes were nothing more than petty thieves. They stole the powers of the Five Great Cookies, who had been sealed away so unjustly, and used these powers at (a?) whim! ***

Ik this is gonna be shockin, but stealing is usually bad lol and being locked away unjustly is a decently common trope for heroes, even Gheese got that experience later on lol

crk on a couple occasions has believed the opposite idea, that lying is having your eyes closed and the truth vice versa, but for the characters of Smilk & PV it's the opposite, the man with his eyes closed at all times is the man who speaks the truth, and the one who has a heavy open eye motif is the liar, so any instance of either doing the opposite is worth considering. A different post made by someone i do not have the capacity to go check on, made me really really think about what that is, and although I don't think my answer is airtight, I think it is because of trust & the choice. In the same vain that cats will close their eyes around those they trust, if you believe something to be true then closing your eyes to not see any possible distortions of the truth is you choosing to trust that what you know is real. That's why way way back when mr was Healer Cookie, he didn't know the truth, and had to be shown it, because a blind fold isnt having your eyes closed voluntarily, his eyes were closed so he could not get new information until he took them off, but the truth wasn't real as the (metaphorical) ones who put them on him had an agenda. With deceit, which already is heavily associated as a choice anyways, is you choosing to take in new information about the world, all information, truth or not, your senses also being inherently biased, and you're not trusting at all. Again, I'm not fully confident about this interpretation, but I do at the very least feel like it has something to do with volition (teehee).

And the final point on this case, I'll get into the sage skin a little later, I think it needs the context of all the points for me to say the words in a coherent manner, but when you tap on him with his skin he will close both his eyes, indicating he is a truthful figure, and default Smilk will wink at you, one eye closed, the other open, he is both truth and deceit, he is to this day the virtue of knowledge

Their belief in their beastly aspect should not be absolute and either be depicted as wavering, contradictory or only partially believed in.

This section has sort of been made obsolete because of previous one, that Smilk cannot just shut his face about how much truth means to him, but I'll try to collect all the instances he just outright tells the truth here, w what I believe to be no caveats, manipulation or distortions. And I only mean sections that he could obviously lie, ofc if he's just expositing plainly or sentences w no comparable false equivalence then I'm not adding those, this isn't a dump to add all of his dialogue in one spot lmao. "..." is hard to make a lie out of lol

Shadow Milk Cookie: You may be celebrating your little victory for now... But heed my words! We have finally risen. Do not think that you can hold us back. ... Pure Vanilla Cookie: ...Shadow Milk Cookie's lies... always have a grain of truth in them. His last words sounded like a warning to us... Perhaps, they were truthful after all. ***

I'll move this section down from the previous category though, since this is the biggest instance of him displaying his antithesis to his beastly nature. The thing that is absolutely most interesting in terms of the idea that Smilk is just fully a believer of the truth specifically, is the chess game. The chess game is the peak point of why this has held me on such a chokehold. I'll summarize the game here for ya, once you read later into this whole text you'll know why I choose to not rely as heavily on quotes.

Besides Brave noticing that it's a big chess board, it is then established that "Each move is like a stimulating conversation, unfolding one step at a time!", which boy don't you know it lmao. The special rules of this version of chess is listed out, the most important one for this section is:

You surely have to realize how big of a deal this is? right? That the beast of deceit, who supposedly should fully have given up on knowledge, be a full believer of lies and intrinsically oppose the Light, chose on his own to play a game with no lies, exclusively with the truth involved, for the sake of gaining knowledge? He's just returning to his Fount days here, the only difference is that he's a bit more of a maniac but that doesn't inherently devalue his connection to his past and mirrored virtues, he's fully and completely demonstrating that not only would he be capable of reform in theory, but that he doesn't even need reform in his belief, he still believes in knowledge and he still believes in the truth, why the hell else would he employ tactics he wouldn't believe in? The entire crux of his own fall is his lack of conviction and self confidence on his own end, and this shows clearer than any scene that he fully still believes in his old virtue, and we know the reason he fell all those days ago into the beast is because Cookies rather choose the sweet, savory taste of Deceit over the harsh reality of the Truth, not because he himself stopped believing in it, abso-fuckin-lutely does it make sense that he never ever shuts up about Truth, because he hasn't given up on it, it's integral to his current believed ideology after all.

Cough, anyways, there's more to the chess scene lol.

He then does his first act of cheating ever, all of his previous acts of deceit technically hasn't broken any rules, implicitly or explicitly, and then possibly argues that he sees Pv as the same as him.

Once the missing chess pieces are acknowledged and the gang gets turned into them, curiously Smilk Points out that they volunteered and wasn't forced by Smilk, which also curiously was a point mentioned earlier this chapter where Pv on his own accord went to the spire. He's starting to point just straight up facts, another word for truth, he's doing it for a point he wants to make later, but it's interesting that the first time he does it is when he was the peak of his villainy, ie peak deceit, so therefore had no reason to speak the truth yet did it anyways and the second time when he's the most Fount he'll ever be this entire chapter.

Shadow Milk Cookie: Let's get this game going! You gotta tell the truth, only the truth, and nothing but the truth! Or your pieces won't move!

He begins with what he believes will be an easy question for Pv, what is a lie? Answered as "... The antipode of truth." Which we can't inherently take as a fact, not in our current state at least, we've got no way of knowing if this is some sort of cosmic entity controlling the board or if Smilk is determining what is the truth, but I think it's easier to assume that it's his belief, especially since it'd be inline with his other conclusions. The second question is however a lot more interesting, what is the truth? which is answered as "The only right thing that must be protected." and that is right, and as we just moments prior established, odds are the answers are what Smilk believes, Smilk agrees with this answer, he also believes that truth is the only right thing and must be protected. This is extraordinarily close to being an outright admission that he's not even a beast, he has no stakes in deceit, he doesn't believe in deceit, it's not right and it shouldn't be protected, he's most likely firmly in team Truth, but because he is so caught up in, ironically, his own game, he doesn't even realize that he's done such a blunder. If you think that interpretation takes it too far, then at the very least what factually did happen is that he was laughing, finding this exercise fun and kept playing, what he didn't do is disagree, or call the board wrong, or say that the board is lying. The next question is probably the closest we get to confirmation that he is controlling what is and isn't truth here, as Pv answers the question he believes to have understood which causes the piece to move but then stop in its tracks to indicate a wrong answer, if he had misunderstood the question and Smilk wasn't in charge I don't think the piece would've jammed in place like that, but Smilk's intent is to prod at Pv, so making the process as painful as possible is a part of that goal.

He is absolutely ecstatic about truly catchin Pv in a lie, he's been pretty quiet or hostile up until this point, and he seemed unsatisfied with the river situation, but here, he truly, legitimately and fully caught him in a lie, for the first time. And then proceeds to be a bad winner about it lmao, but importantly is in love with the possibiltiy that Pv might not know the difference between right and wrong, which, once again, ironically, is happening to him this entire match lol

Shadow Milk Cookie: Ah, what a thrilling game! Looks like I have the upper hand! He he he he he!

Mans is lost in the sauce lol. When he notices the souljam reating he pivots into talking about White Lily, which really seems to affect Pv poorly to Smilk's excitement, and then once again goes at it from the angle that he's not at fault, that this is actually all Pv's fault. Where he then just says the funniest thing huh.

Shadow Milk Cookie: In the end, it all comes down to a very simply conclusion. If the so-called "truth" were the only right thing, it would've granted you the power to overcome all the odds you've been up against! Whose fault is it?

Don't tell Smilk which category this is in, or the words he said like 3 paragraphs ago lmao, he'd be fuming right about now xddd

As Pv admits that he agrees, that he is weak and is all at fault, Smilk bursts into laughter and starts taunting Pv, absolutely adoring watching him fall further and further. But then does another really funny thing.

Shadow Milk Cookie: If I was able to bring you down so easily... That makes me your Truth, doesn't it?! Yours and everyone else's! ... And so, the ultimate Deceit becomes the ultimate Truth! Now that's right up my alley!

Smilk go 5 seconds in this chess match not being your own antithesis challenge level impossible lmao.

He then repeats an idea he said in one of the first chapters, something that because I've organized this poorly that I don't think y'all know about yet, that Smilk wants to control Pv, and that pv and just relax and follow his command. Smilk with his final question pulls out his testing of the waters, what he truly believes in, going full project blast canon lmao-- Since he believes his endeavour of knowledge was futile, that his sharing of the truth was landed on deaf ears, perhaps his own vision was incorrect all along, was his entire purpose, his life? A lie? And that filled him w supposedly enough regret to get him to beastify. So now he believes he has put Pv through the same feelings, the same disappointment, the same futility, the same disproving, that he must also regret his whole life now. But he reacts unexpectedly, he starts laughing, to the confusion of Smilk, where Pv starts to just cheat..... Which Smilk LOVES, he LOVES it SO much, the projection being completely and utterly dodged doesn't matter at all, because Pv is becoming more like him!! He is clearly embracing deceit!!! He is far more than overjoyed at this moment, the loudest and most excited his own entourage has ever seen. He admits that he thought Pv still had more resolution, but this here showing proved otherwise and commends him for the act, adoring that Pv is fulfilling his potential and using his own tricks.

I really, really hope that I've at least a little bit conveyed how much this entire game revealed Smilk's full hand with this game, seemingly entirely beneath his very own nose: he displayed he still believes in truth and knowledge, that he doesnt believe in deceit, that he views himself as the ultimate truth, that he's torn down his own defences around Pv a fuckton, and I'm not sure if he event knowingly told a single lie during the entire match, just prodded the guy and faked a single coin. If anything at all killed his chances to win as a villain it was the chess game, it undermined his power internally and externally a huge amount, and he never recovers it again.

The other half of their soul jam should not permanently reject them.

(ie, the pv analysis also included in here lol)

Pvs change into acceptance is definitively most obvious at the very end, and I'll ofc show my work even if everyone knows it, especially if you follow the smilk tag and are the likeliest to read this lol-- but it did not begin at the end, nor is it exclusive to the latest chapter, there has been drips of it earlier.

Shadow Milk Cookie: Out of these false heroes, which ones is only half a Cookie? ... Gingerbrave: None of them! Shadow Milk Cookie: WRONG!!! ... Pure Vanilla Cookie: The right answer is... All of them. Shadow Milk Cookie: ..... RING DING DING!!! Did you hear that?! A correct response from our sharp audience! My my, I'll let you advance to the next round!*** Shadow Milk Cookie: Out of these three Cookies... Who is the biggest liar? ... Pure Vanilla Cookie: The biggest liar is... me, Pure Vanilla Cookie. ... Pure Vanilla Cookie: ... It's correct, isn't it? Shadow Milk Cookie: Unbelievable! You got it right again! RING DING DING!!! That Pure Vanilla Cookie knows his thing! I'm impressed, I must say!... Indeed, what is pure, unquestionable truth if not deceit...?

PV is always the one to answer all of Smilk's og quiz questions correctly (the ones he's allowed to answer at least lol, and the one that he wasn't allowed to answer was answered "wrong"), which not only establishes that they are to some capacity on the same wavelength from the very start not just because smilk is in the souljam lol so it isn't a result of his very pleasant stay at his tower /lh but also each time Smilk not only respects the answer, he also ignores the previously established (unquoted) punishment in favor of Pvs correct answer on the first one and on the second one compliment him, establishing at least some sort of report for Smilk to recognize

Also wanna take a quick moment on that second set of quotes, to further re-establish that 100% truth cannot exist w/o lies, and to elaborate to make me not seem insane here lmao, it's the same principle as "history is written by the victors" or however the phrase goes, objective truth does not necessarily equate to described truth, nor does a telling of truth automatically mean that the entire truth is revealed since that is quite difficult to do, whatever information you omit will change the way the information is ingested by the audience, and it doesn't have to be the case of lies by omission to our perspective either, you can describe you playing with your kid on a playground, a fully true statement, but you omitted that it was raining when you were outside, the omission I'd be hard-pressed to call a lie personally but it changes the story quite drastically. And even if you don't agree w this sentiment, at bare minimum that's the world that crk has established in these chapters to be true, and I think it is inferable that Smilk would find those omissions to be lies.

(Read aloud by pv): And thus did the all-devouring heart of darkness fall into slumber... The Beast-binding Rituatl of the Witches demands a great wisdom and even greater sacrifice. It much be conducted by someone who is ready to pay the price. This power lies hidden, far and out of reach, for you are forbidden from meddling with magic beyond you ken. Now, The Spire of All Knowledge stands without a master... where all knowledge began, and there it shall remain, as long as there is light. You who dares lay hand on the forbidden knowledge! After many a hardship, may you find the answer your seek... Pure Vanilla Cookie: The master of the Spire... It's about Shadow Milk Cookie, without a doubt. He could be there... Awaiting me... Without a doubt, having gained a physical form, he will pose a much greater threat... Our encounter can't be avoided. No matter if I fear it or not. The Beast are regaining their former power. All the more reason to face them and put and end to their evil. For the good of all Cookies, of the entire world!

The book planted specifically to trick the gang to go to the spire instantly gets snuffed out by PV, he notices instantly that the tower is Smilk's and its likely to contain the man himself, he goes not because he's tricked as Capple believes and relays in her overworld dialogue w smilk, but by his own volition (teehee)

At no point does he get legitimately tricked by Smilk specifically, all the times he does get tricked they're not by cookies with the eyes that are shown in the portraits to be a consistent feature or the flashbacks where the eyes are always eventually shown-- all the pain he goes through is either his own resolution (teehee) to be kind or his kindness being taken advantage of, but he is always in tune w Smilk

Bit annoyin to put the entire interaction down so there's the entire section lol [04 Young Shepherd Cookie], but the entire one of the wolfherd (which I don't think is Smilk, as explained earlier) is an example of him bein taken advantage of, he prioritizes kindness over being suspicious of the kid even though he has already acknowledged they are surely in Smilk's domain-- but once the kid is established to be safe & help is offered Pv then doesn't say a word and generally just acts surprised at the story, until the very end where the gang is talking amongst themselves recognizing that they've been tricked, First Strawberry, then Gingerbrave, then Wizard... But not Pv, he implicitly establishes to the team that kindness is more important than the lying, and recognizes internally that this is Smilk's presence in effect.

The story after is one that can be interpreted as Pv lying, cookie is dying before him, and he tells the cookie what I would argue to be ethical lies, which is that the cookie will be fine. The absolute last thing you want a dying patient to do is give up, you need them to follow your orders, and you need them to believe it will work, because if they don't that's just a self fulfilling prophecy and they are much more likely to go kaput. He suspected that it might be too late but not for a second did that stop him from trying, but since this was an artificial situation to begin w nothing was going to work, ofc. And once Pv finds out that this is another (non Smilk performed) trick and that his kindness has once been taken advantage of, he once again reinstates that kindness is more important and keeps wanting to help the cookie out.

And the final one after, the one with the towerkeeper, is harder at least for me to determine, keeping one of his eyes closed automatically puts him on the sus meeter as a truthful speaker, the way he presents his question as a riddle instead of a quiz yet formats and phrases his question the exact same as Smilk, praising Pvs answer, but also Pv not seeing through the trick if it was performed by Smilk, at most I'd argue that he may be the third closest connection Smilk has but that's very much flimsy and unbiased heh (unrelated but idk why white lily leaves except exclusively to make the story less crowded lol)

Pure Vanilla Cookie: We must look carefully for any clues on the ritual. ... Apple Faerie Cookie: Oh yes... It's as if everything we knew... was wrong! Pure Vanilla Cookie: Let us not jump to conclusions. Perhaps, it's another test... We must keep searching. ... Perhaps, it's a trick to make us stray from our path.

Pvs order of priority the moment of entering the spire is Kindness - Searching for the ritual, then Suspicion - is this another trick, then Confirmation - yes this is a trick, im recognizing this is a stretch which given the experiences w the wolfherd and the dying cookie is decently consistent w how he reacts to non smilk made lies

Pure Vanilla Cookie: The Light... of Truth...? This is... the Dark Side of the Moon... Another dream. ... ... What are you saying? Are you not... my guiding light? Light of Truth: Do not doubt me, Pure Vanilla Cookie...! I am the Light of Truth. Your old friend. All this time, I've been illuminating your path. Fore a long, long time... Even when you were smaller than your Cream Lamb.

Tbh to be frank idk what happens here lmao, he should be fully aware that the light is compromised and even recognizes that this is the moon, so absolutely smilk's influence here... yet he still believes the light to not be smilk...? But at least i think its reasonably inferable that the moment that the cream lamb is mentioned thats when Pv suses stuff out, I really dont know with this one gang, if ya wanna use this as the bullet to shoot my analysis down there's not much I can argue lmao

(The cards): Fshh... Gingerbrave: Huh? What are these cards? They have peculiar markings on them...! Pure Vanilla Cookie: These are tarot cards. Fortunate tellers use them to read someone's future.

Also I don't think Smilk pulls any tricks that Pv himself isn't previously aware of, the moment recluse in the inn brings out the tarot cards Pv immediately knows what they are, I don't think Pv was at all confused what chess was about lol

Fotune Teller Cookie: This way! ... Follow me, now! We're Safe. They won't reach us here ... ... No wonder. After all, this is the Spire of Deceit. Here, have a Jelly. Gingerbrave: Huh... Whoah! Thanks! But we have no time! We need to save our friend! Fortune Teller Cookie: No. You must go back. ... Don't you understand? You cannot win the battle against the Beast of Deceit. ... You'vebeen deceived by someone you trusted. You couldn't see the illusions of the Spire for what they were. So, tell me. How can you save your friend? ... ... If there's still a friend to save. *** Fortune Teller Cookie: Wait. ... I must ask one last question. Does your resolve remain strong? Are you sure you won't regret your choice, come what may? ... ... Follow me. You will only meet more foes down this path. I will show you a safer road.

Now when we're actually in the spire, we can also keep a closer eye on the fortune teller, since we know that he and Pv are on in the same, and we're not going to go into any details as to why teller cause we're instantly going to get into weird timey winey shenanigans lmao. The first what we see of teller once entering the spire is exclusively kindness, he is terrified of the beast but his priority is getting the people out of there. But once the gang absolutely refuses to follow his word, his kindness shifts, if he cannot ensure their safety, he will at least help them to the best of his ability.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: This place... Looks different but feels the same. As if it has revealed its true colors. I must get back to my friends. ...?! These portraits... They all depict Shadow Milk Cookie! They all look different, but it's unmistakably him!*** Pure Vanilla Cookie: This must be Shadow Milk Cookie when he was still called "The Fount of Knowledge"... Everyone is looking up to him. But there are some Cookies who chose... to deny reality. They rejected the bitterness of the world in favor of the sweetness of Deceit... He must have walked a solitary path... ***

Further establishment that the instant Smilk tries to pull off any trickery, although these just bein portraits and not him literally, Pv will instantly snuff it out. And also that enforcing that they're on the same wavelength, that once again when it isn't hittin too close to home he will relate to Smilk.

In the entirety of 18, 19 & 20, he immediately fights back against Smilk, multiple occasions pointing out that he's not telling the truth, being resolute (teehee, ok ill stop lol) in his own self, in a very few occasions faltering for just a step but then immediately regaining his ground. He's not stoic and he is struggling yes, but he has 3 things he believes in and he's not going down yet heh.

Also the next one 21, I'm not super confident if this fictional section lets Pv have any autonomy? But if we assume he does he once again prioritizes kindness over smilk/his tricks, as he heals a cookie even if it means smilk knows his location, he will 100% risk a fight or even dyin if it means he can save at least one other cookie.

And then we get the teller decrying how they never change and turning into recluse scene, or well, sorta, but shh we're not talking about the time travel its weird lmao-- where I mostly just want to mention the connection to the earlier point I made, the shaky interpretation, that the "reason" he turned into the recluse was because he had his eyes open to all the lies, he didn't close his eyes to the lies and let them in, clouding his judgement.

And now we've finally entered the latest chapter, where I should immediately apply our framework that we have to view the entire chapter through:

I'm letting this one tick down my image count, because it's that important. It's admitted at the very end, that this whole recluse thing was an act all along, that he tricked smilk, because Smilk can never lie to Pv and have him not notice it, that image I sent earlier? The one where pv is looking into the mirror and sees smilk? I think thats what he means when they "became one" and knew that smilk was lonely, so yes, before the fall, he knew-- He was still very fragile, very fickle, it wasn't like he was stoically going through the experience, very little would've convinced him to give up, but he knew there was a light to go towards and take advantage of, that tiny light was enough to keep him trucking, to keep him lying, to keep his resolution. I should also make it clear why I think the "becoming one" was that scene and not the scene where he becomes souljam of deceit x2, since I believe that's the scene that most people will assume that is referring to not the one I believe it to be, and tbh... i don't really have facts facts to back either of them up, neither of them sound like good candidates for being the scene, I don't think becoming 2 can be automatically instinctually argued as becoming 1 lol, hell idek what the (unquouted) "I saw your records." is referring to, but all I can do is present my case why it makes more sense for Pv to have been acting the whole time, instead of truly having given up and only the last couple minutes did this specific spark of hope work and not one of the dozen other ones.

So, with that down, once we go to the first part of the latest chapter, is that we know the consistent behaviour for Pv is to instantly snuff Smilk out, when Smilk is not involved he will go in the order of Kindness > Suspicion > Confirmation, his entire full and complete motivation + light at the end of the tunnel is his friends, his goal is to make smilk let his guard down (+ presumably make it out alive), and if at all possible in the slightest; befriend smilk. Alright? We're on the same page? Final chapter time heh. I will be going through the entirety of it in a summarizing fashion, adding in my own reasoning for the claim I made earlier and will quote things whenever I think it establishes things, instead of just the quotes being contextless.

First ep doesn't include any Pv, but it shows Smilk being more brazen w his lies, no longer are they sprinkled w truth, this ep is pretty much peak "villain", yes, even more villain than him gettin 2 deceit souljams, he is relishing in his first major step in victory, a footnote I make later in this diatribe because I cannot order these points to save my life, is that Smilk has long wanted Pv in his clutches, before Pv entered the spire did he intend to capture Pv.

So in ep 2 o with that accomplished he is joyous and flaunts his power to Pv. Pv however is silent and Smilk immediately tries to pry out information from him, guessing what could possibly be on his mind. Pv however has incredibly little interest in being swayed by the power display and nagging, his interest lies is solely within his friends, as although not directly confirmed word for word it seems after Pvs 'goodbye', his absolute rock bottom, Smilk took the gang away, the fear of them being harmed once again awakening Pvs kindness, even for only the tiniest smidgeon, I gotta reiterate this is incredibly fickle, if Smilk were to go hard on Pv rn he would probably give up entirely, the light can just barely rarely get Pv to act in accordance to pre-recluse in its current state. His plan to deceive Smilk isn't in process yet, he's mostly just processing what's happening to him and mostly letting his impulses guide him through the events. Smilk enjoys plucking the obvious weakpoint of Pv, but once again Smilk's nagging isn't his friends, so he doesn't really bother with it. Since Smilk is actively plucking said string, weakening that light, when he brings them out Pv doesn't respond, leading Smilk to poke a little further. A timeskip occurs where Smilk "toys" with the gang, whatever that means, and establishes that the only reason any of the gang is alive is due to his non-violent desires, where he then gets distracted ig? And grabs Pv, threatening to grab the souljam, Pv immediately recoiling and supposedly going to claim that its his, and since he's mostly on autopilot and Beat To Hell Mentally he gets pretty pissed, so Smilk's prodding finally gets an answer he likes out of Pv, but fully believes there is more boiling under Pvs skin so prods further to get him to lash out further. The gang interrupts trying to assure Pv to keep on fightin, and whilst Sapph tries to threaten them further with the legacy of Smilk, but that doesn't deter Brave at all. Smilk decides however to take the moment to, I think enter the souljam? Where he notices how unstable it is, who would've thunk it ikr, where its then established that his plan probably only extended to the recluse stage, after having a little bit of fun w recluse he would then take the souljam and move on, but because of how fragile it is he gets curious, where he then decides to see how far down he can go, the very next sentence admitting he changed his mind from whatever it was before.

They're then all taken to the river, where they just explain that truthtellers drown and those who "embrace deceit" don't, woot exposition lol. Pv however havin been rallied by his friends moments before being sent here but also still being pretty pissy snaps back, establishing his own autonomy, wherein Smilk does a wonderful job immediately undermining the tiniest pushback he got lmao. Oh I should probably mention its the choice of him or his friends right? So yeah, kindness wins out, without a word he chooses himself and heads straight into the river. And as we know earlier, his friends is the stated reason why he got out of the river, and I believe once he gets out of the river, after maybe hearing all of the confident blabberin from Smilk and definitively the blasted hoorays from after he re-emeges, is when he gets his plan to trick Smilk is in action.

His eyes being closed the moment he emerges from the water has nothing to do with that conclusion, just btw /j, lh

I do think he did hear what they were saying when he was under the water, as asking "... Are you satisfied now?" directly replies to their previous disappointment, in finding him just drowning instantly to be anticlimactic, with the ensuing excitement as I previously explained ensures. And just to make it a little clearer, I believe this is the moment where he sets his plan to deceive Smilk, yk, perhaps, oh, idk, he "embraces deceit" and that allowed him to complete the requirements laid out by the river?

The chess scene is where things get really, really intersting for Smilk, but I think I'm going to put that in the earlier section, and leave any Pv relevant parts here. So yes since you're reading the finished product you would've already known my dissection of the chess game, teehee.

As the rules get explained and Wizard questions the "No lies" rule, Pv seems to be implied to be physically repulsed by the idea, but doesn't say anything, since Smilk notices that he doesn't want to play the game. The coin gets flipped, the coin is rigged, Smilk goes first. Ik I mentioned this quote earlier in the two sides of a coin section, "Aren't we like two peas in a pod? I get that a lot! Heh. Sometimes it's hard to tell us apart!", but I want to elaborate a tiny bit on the point, because this is the first time we ever see Smilk cheat, which yes I talked about earlier but this is about Pv lol, he deceives and lies, but he hasn't ever broken any implicitly or explicitly stated rules before this point, so I think it's one of 3 options, the least meaningful one is that he is talking about how they look similar, you simply mistook my face for Pv's how silly of you, or the two remaining options, that Smilk also sees Pv as a cheater or re-enforcing previous information where he believes Pv to be the biggest liar in the world, and tbh I think it's probably a mix of both. Afterwards the comment about the lack of chess pieces arises, and ofc the friends get turned into pieces, which he doesn't seem to react a ton to either. Though if I can extrapolate a bit farther than I think is reasonable for the claim I've made, I think he is just paying attention to what Smilk is saying, as we also know that Pv knows, that Smilk is full of suspicions, so if you want to trick the master of lies, you really need to know what he truly believes in. Now he no longer is just defensive and trying to protect his own resolution, he is now trying to calculate what Smilk's truth is, which in turn makes him sturdier-- But ofc only like, by 1% maybe, he ain't recovering for a while lmao. Pv says his first words this entire ep when he answers Smilk's proposed easy question, what is a lie. And then the second answer also doesn't bring a ton of insight into Pv, but the third does, as its designed to provoke Pv. The original question is "How do we judge what is right?" which gets instantly contorted into absolute nonsense, mans a weasel here lmao, and it instead turns into a question of "When you blew up the souljams (I think is what happened) for what you believed to be the greater good, would you do that again?" to which Pv denies, leading to the piece getting stuck some more.

It seems the implied answer is that because Pv adamantly and continuously refuses to give another answer, Smilk and then continuously get free moves, though the first thing we see is him being quiet some more. Though his souljam (wherever it is lol) is physically reacting in some manner, as once again it is reacting to his friends. After having been mostly quiet this entire match, and only showing much of any stronger emotion by being surprised at Smilk's weaseling but quickly regained his composure, he finally snaps at Smilk again, when White Lily, his best friend, is brought up, and havin to think about her really aint makin him feel too good lol. But after being nagged about it by Smilk he seems to snap out of it, and returns to quiet fuming. Smilk pivots then once again, to establish a point he has been making, which is that everything is Pv's fault, which Pv has now seemed to have caught up on as Smilk's intention, as he replies "... You're right. Perhaps... It's entirely my fault..." with a totally not suspicious annoyed expression on the model, which causes Smilk to immediately burst into laughter and ecstatic. He goes on this tirade about how pathetic Pv is, that he's not the cookie of deceit and how Smilk is not the ultimate truth, but Pv as usual doesn't say much. Smilk then at least sounds like he pulls out his trump card, since Smilk has now thoroughly broken down Pv's perception of truth so that in turn obviously means Pv's point of existance, yk, truth, as pointless and a lie in of itself, shouldn't Pv regret his life for having followed this false ideology? But Pv here has his own ace card to play, noticing the weakness in Smilk's ideology Pv refuses to answer, if he's the cookie of deceit now, which as established earlier, means they can cheat, that means Pv can now cheat, and proceeds to immediately save his friend from immediate peril whilst laughing maniacally to hide the true intent of his actions. This act seems to have taken the wind out of him and he spends the little while recovering whilst Smilk is laughing harder than ever before. After recovering from his laughing fit he commends Pv for not being foolish and surprising him. Unbeknownst to Smilk, he is revealing his own hand, that Smilk is lowering his guard.

Now with the chess game over, Wizard seems awfully eager for the next activity, where we immediately get a great quote from Smilk.

Shadow Milk Cookie: Cookies fear what they don't understand. Always so quick to fill that void with the first thing that fits their belief system! Anything, really!

Given that's entierly true for Mystic, reasonably true for Sbice and technically true for Smilk, I have a feeling I might know at least a little bit how the other two beast's will work lol. Once again, the story repeats, game is introduced, this time it's cards, and friends get in trouble, whoopsies. This time however Pv has had enough, accidentally regressing the upper hand he had gotten from the previous game, whoopsies lol, where he snaps at Smilk to stop involving the friends, and that this is between only them-- he couldn't contain his desire for kindness, and seeing them threatened so often was getting to him too much. Smilk with this reveal of weakness keeps his cards (teehee) incredibly close to his chest, getting more reinforcement that the friends are the ticket to his broken jam. This game along with the chess game is also all about telling the truth, and if they "lie", whatever that means for tarot cards, they get shredded for it. I saw someone like yesterday talk about how interesting the cards answers were, but I'm running on the finest fumes Adhd can give, so I don't remember any of that whatsoever lmao; they should probably be a neighbouring post if this guy doesn't get shadowbanned for being a billion words long. The cards then threaten to do bodily functions cookies shouldn't be able to do but we aren't going on that tangent either lmao. Smilk places all the upset cards out, and asks Pv to pull out the desired cards, who initially refuses but quite quickly folds (teehee, feck I said I would stop that lol) and picks some anyways, where the gang loudly try to rig the cards, to which Smilk just finds cute & pathetic. It turns out that by the force of some kind, most likely Smilk himself, the terrible unfortunate cards are consistently drawn every single time for Pv who doesn't react much, and after trying over and over he decides to instead draw for himself, which then something physically occurs to Pv? I'm not sure what he just hurks over for a second and then doesn't get followed up upon lol. After Smilk rigged his own tarot cards, he then lets Pv try again, to the absolute befuddlement of his entourage, but Pv doesn't accept the offer, not wanting to let Smilk win. But since Smilk for some reason really wants Pv to practice the cards he doesn't go very hard on his prodding this time, instead throwing out some empty threats and focusing on pivoting to showing Pv his room so that he can totally go practice his tarots in there instead, of course establishing that escape is no option. And the final panel is Pv being confused about something, but I'm not sure if it's because of Smilks handing of cards over to Sapph or if Capple is that loud in her anger.

I'm gonna skip most of the Capple drama, I'm mostly confused why the writers wrote her that way? I don't really read it as out of character inherently but it's just, weird? Why'd you do that lol. But the duo does talk about how weird it is for Smilk to behave this way. Also not sure what that really tells about any of the people involved, but Smilk has not informed the duo adequately how he feels about Pv, so they just think he's emotionally no different than any normal cookie, instead of, yk, pining /lh,

After that weirdness occurred, Smilk threatens to murder Capple, so ngl I'm not gonna guess they've got a great personal relationship together.

Then just. filler I think? I'm not sure why we learn the functions of deceit, it doesn't really seem pertinent. Might just be crk wanting to throw in some ideas they had idk lol

Some more filler but then jumpscare Smilk has a curiosity he wants to fulfill, since this entire time his actions could be in theory completely dictated by his very presence, yes? So what happens when Smilk isn't around, will Pv crack?

Pv however, believes he still has the upper hand, he's now in that final step of that plan, he has to make Smilk believe that he won, but that does mean being technically mean to his friends, which he does apologize for later heh. He doesn't actively aggro his friends though, he just keeps emphasizing his "loyality" to Smilk, with a pertinent point being.

Truthless Recluse: I think I'm beginning to understand him. And... it fills me with fear and self-loathing. Wizard Cookie: Shadow Milk Cookie thinks he made you join his side! He thinks he's won! Truthless Recluse: ... He is not wrong.

Besides him describing Smilk's innermost feelings almost to a T, when your own friends tell you to your face your plan is working, I think you're doin an alright job w your deception lol, He goes on a long monologue about how much he doesn't care and how he's the greatest liar ever. However, something goes awry, really awry, in fact, it wasn't just me analysing the scenes who noticed, the friends in fact noticed Pv's behaviour. They start questioning his character, which instantly breaks Pv's character, and then they list out all the actions Pv has committed to keep his friends safe this entire time, whilst struggling to find the words as he has no good answer as to why he would've saved them if he truly, genuinely, didn't care for them anymore, if they really meant nothing to him, if he truly gave up all the way back, why are any of his friends alive right now?-- they bombard him with the truth of his actions, where he then gives up trying to talk back. After a long pause he instead brings out the tool he knows that Smilk, will enjoy, the tool that will cement his connection with Smilk, that neither party will be able to tell him that he's lying right now, the tarot cards, and seals his friends away.

Sapph comes in to collect them, where Pv acts his cruellest, for the first time actually dismissing his friends completely, which I absolutely can see the argument that this is proof that he truly doesn't care about them. I would however argue that Pv was overcompensating, he knows he will never harm them, and so far that has been entirely within his control, Smilk so far has never harmed the gang directly so Pv has had plenty of proof that turning them in will likely not endanger the gang, keeping the gang around would also harm his deception extraordinarily so, super mega so, it might genuinely completely ruin his entire trick, if he showed any mercy at all in the slightest to his friends might tip Smilk off that his kindness has been growing as time has gone on, not diminishing, but because of their grilling of him he was terrified of the possibility, so like i said i believe, he overcompensated, surely there's no way Smilk thinks I'm lying if I had no interest at all whatsoever in the slightest of accepting their offer. I am so mean and evil, Smilk won't suspect a thing and my friends won't be harmed.

Smilk, which I believe was implied to be floating outside of the window spying on Pv, knows that "he failed to get his friends to leave", so twists that into Pv now missing his friends, and proposes a solution, one that Pv can already tell what said solution is. Smilk is excited once more that Pv is becoming more like him, not only does he use the same tricks, not only can he now do tarots, but he now knows what games they're going to play.

Then they just, participate in the game, Brave accidentally spoils the ending by saying he knows their friends wouldn't turn on them, I wonder who that could be about /lh. Smilk starts prodding Pv again, who wordlessly rolls the dice. After a couple rounds Smilk comments on how boring this game is, and Pv explains that they've basically got infinite resolution, which is either a really bad play by him, or Pv's intimate understanding that Smilk's guard is so low that he knew that Smilk would do exactly what he'd do, which is brush it off and ignore it. The mistake that truly happens though is not limited to Pvs, the friends call out to him and tell him to stay determined, and Pv trying his best to keep his stoicism his souljam struggles to lie the same, leading to Smilk noticing that the string can still be plucked, and decides to see what happens if it snaps.

Smilk has to some capacity restrained the gang, expressing tiredness from their lack of appreciation, imposing the power over his land, reiterating his strength, all to turn to Pv, and ask him instead for a solution to these pesky cookies, who asks what he wants him to do, but Smilk insists that Pv should have to make the choice, surprising Pv. Which then leads to Smilk revealing the optoins, as usual, kill the gang or give over the souljam. This is admittedly one of the only points of contention with the claim I made ages ago at this point lol, how would he change the color of the souljam if he wasn't really losing his truth here, the biggest stretch I could give is that he's not abandoning his truth, he is instead prioritizing deceit. He is building up to this moment after all, he knows that Smilk is currently at his lowest defence right now, so convincing him he is an ally through becoming the thing he knows Smilk wants, becoming a cookie of deceit, seems like a logical thought process for him to have, I just, really don't know if that'd convert the color of his jam though lol, maybe its excusable enough that it only converts halfway. He then hands over the half white souljam over to Smilk, who immediately pulls the rug under Pv, because he is pissed off at the gang for being such a nuisance this entire time, and he also knows that its the remaining tether between Pv becoming exactly like him, and off the tower they go, devastating Pv.

He pleads for answers, but Smilk just taunts him, and brings back the ace from ages ago, he's been planting the seeds for Pv to believe that Smilk is innocent after all, this is him cashing it in. He reveals his guard wasn't actually that low, and that he had noticed the fact the gang are still alive. I'm not sure how to describe the intent of his diatribe, ig just quoting it doesn't hurt, he's snappy about it at least.

Shadow Milk Cookie: What was it? Your petty self-righteousness? Foolishness? Sense of Guilt? What was it that made your Soul Jam ring like a thousand bells?! Oh, I couldn't stand this annoying sound of whatever was left of your feeble will that kept resonating and resonating throughout the entire place!

The reason why idk how to describe it is because he then shifts over to gleefulness, where he explains the transition from simply wanting the soul jam to wanting to see what happened when he prodded him. Pv however, instantly picked up on what Smilk was putting down, and instantly repeating exactly word for word what Smilk wants to hear. He then shows the souljam is now completely white, which since it has been in the hands of Smilk and we know the souljam can change colors if the beast gets a hold of it I see no reason why that isn't a good enough explanation to cover the rest of my back lol. Pv however, still wants his shiny rock please and thank you, because he's still enacting his plan, his souljam is his, because it is now the souljam of deceit.

Truthless Recluse: Is this what you wanted? Or is it even better? Instead of one Soul Jam of Knowledge, you will have two Soul Jams of Deceit. And me, forever by your side.

Mans knows exactly the words Smilk wants to hear to a T, mans gauging how correct he was in his reply lmao, also mans says "we are meant to be together" and smilk does :D. Oh and also reiteration of his desire to control Pv. Pv also instantly checks how much power he actually gained from either himself converting a little bit to deceit or having smilks powers infused into the souljam after holding onto it lmao. After smilk gets like a minute to brag Pv immediately has won, his plan succeeded, Pure Vanilla Cookie successfully tricked Shadow Milk Cookie.

Smilk, realizing what has just happened, goes through a lot of stages of emotions, first dismay that he cannot control his other realm, then anger at Pv, specifically regarding that he was tricked, making him sound very hypocritical I wonder why he would be hypocritical what about his character would indicate that he would be bothered by being tricked i dunnooo /lh, then almost uncontrollable rage as he demands the souljam where he rushes pv with anger, then surprise, and i believe for a final moment awe, then pv decides to stab his souljam which is a choice for sure lol. I think the way I would read it requires us to tangent into his awakened form, so uh, tangent time.

Pv's awakened form is all about recognizing the importance of truth and deceit, thanks for coming to my ted talk. ok well no in seriousness the most important part is that he has smilk's eyes in his cape thing, both opened and closed ones, an absolute shitton of his design takes from smilk, his room has keys to smilk's locks, he has moon decorations that are smilks theme whilst he also has sun ones for pv, he has scrolls which is in both his Sage & Fount outfits are important design elements. His awakened form also has a couple lines that signify the importance of both truth and deceit, "You can learn a thing for(?) two from Deceit", "Truth and Deceit may be inseperable...". There are also far more dialogue than pre awakened of his desire for friendship & connection for others, since it only has 2 compared to awakened's 7, friendship, determination and resolution are the primary things that made him awaken into compassion.

There we go, tangent over, with that established, since he stabbed his souljam, do we think it could possibly be direct symbolism that he's breaking the original meaning of his souljam, that it's not just the souljam of truth, but the souljam of both truth and deceit, as both are important to him now? Just a thought? Maybe possible sorta? Anyways back to the rest of the ep lol, he goes through anime transformation sequence where he goes through every aspect of his life, sploshes through milk, then gets ribbons of the yellow/white of truth and the dark blue/eyes of deceit, really hammering home that both aspects are intrinsic to his existence as awakened. He then gets his memories fixed, he describes them being fixed to some capacity as his choices, so regaining the autonomy that smilk so badly wanted but could never once from start to finish ever manage to control. Smilk responds accordingly by calling him a traitor, where Pv's first words to smilk is (paraphrased) "I will embrace deceit, I will accept doubt, everything holds answers, don't you agree mr knowledge man. we can be poggies together duder" which smilk is not a fan of whatsoever, "A lie shall vanquish a lie!" Which is just a description of what he did lol. I think I hit my tired mark, Ill try to stay coherent

Next ep is filler resolution from the first ep

Then Smilk is pissed, but pv doesnt care, his nr 1 action is kindness after all, and especially now when he has awakened and embraced deceit he can see through smilk even more than he already could, he has no reason to fear smilk whatsoever, smilk just laughs in his face to pvs confusion, smilk recognizes his power imbalance and tries to take advantage of that the friends are dead, but teller came back and saved them, leaving smilk with no leverage at all anymore, he is lesser than pv in every single way now, then pv explains how there can be 2 pvs, pv prevents one of the tarot cards but i still dk what any of those cards mean so cant help you there on what he's on about, they fuse together into one, and then smilk comes in pissed cause no one is paying attention to him, he so desperately is clawing for any kind of upper hand

but pv just, isnt phased by it whatsoever, once again because he embraced deceit he is twice the cookie smilk is, and reaches out to smilk, he tries to gain the upper hand again but it doesnt work, pv explains that friendship poggies which smilk finds dumb. Pv then asks why did you do all that shit today, im simply curious dude, smilk tries to mask, pv sees right through it cause of the aforementioned records which told him that smilk was ecstatic when the souljams touched tips i mean deceit, smilk realizing his truest feelings is just bein splayed out for everyone to se shuts down further, but pv pushes through and tries to find common ground, but as someone who has had everyone turn their back to him and then spent lifetimes lying shockingly struggles w friendship, so this connection shit is so inane to him he cant help but just break out into laughter and desperately claw at reasons why it wouldnt work, that he already has his spire, and pv must just be dumbass, but pv aint havin none of it, if you truly didnt give a shit you wouldnt have done all of this effort bestie, but smilk doesnt like that pv is still right so tried once again to flat failure to gain the upper hand, where we then return to all the way back in the beginning, we finish off the loop, pv explains how they became one, and he could sense how lonely smilk was, which smilk reacts violently too, this is hitting insanely close to home and he'd rather not have him keep airing out his feelings please and thank you, pv does not, "Yes, Shadow Milk Cookie. No one else but me can truly understand you. We share the same Soul Jam. We can understand each other like no one else can. You don't have to be lonely... I'm right here. Please. Let me be your... friend.", which for the first second ever this entire ep, doesn't reveal his secret feelings, doesnt accidentally get brought to the surface, but truly cracks his defense, even if its only the tiniest of cracks, Smilk hesitates at the notion, he thinks about it, genuinely, for just a mere moment, which as you can imagine he doesn't like that it just happened and becomes violent again, raising his defenses a billion times as all petulant bullies do and screams his head off and we bonk him heh. pv still outclasse smilk, he has his powers, there is nothing smilk can do that pv cant do, so smilk is at most just bein a whiny baby here, so pv tries again to connect, but smilk is, lets say, not in the right headspace for this conversation, and is rude lol. He then runs away and the first thing pv says is functinoally "ill get to see him again :)"

Now, after aaaaaaaaaallllll that, what have we learnt about pv and his likelihood of forgiving smilk? I at least feel like the odds are the he has already forgiven smilk, that smilk doesn't actually have much that needs to be forgiven as pv was playing along and that he will choose kindness every time. yeah im gonna say its probably decently likely that pv's biggest lesson in practice is determination, he will persevere because his friends are always worth it-- and no intent of not extending his compassion to someone he has already embraced and intimately understands.

also ik it's irrelevant cause it's not talking about the facts, but remember when i mentioned way back at the beginning of the post that I made comments about the stories in discord?

That was my live first reaction to the story at that point, so unless I'm a massive untrusting moron, I think at least I can say there's reasonable precedent to believe that he wasn't at least intended to have truly 'fallen'.

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Okay FINE I'll talk about why the time travel is weird lmao. It's cause it's not time travel xd I think its the grandfather paradox in play? Because if they are indeed the very same Pv, then their endgame shouldnt be capable of changing, there should be no "real" failed recluse and then our awaken pv, they should both be failed or both be awakened, it turns out im too tired to explain how the order of events works, but pv cant get awakened w/o teller, and teller cant know to go to awakened when there is no awakened yet, yes i did write this all in one night thats adhd for you, so the couple options that are available are:

It's an AU not timetravel, meaning all Teller scenes are irrelevant to any analysis of Pv, they lived different lives, it is irrelevant.

It's entirely made by Smilk to trick the gang, which makes the least amount of sense cause he would've then knowingly constructed his own downfall given he should have knowledge of the awakening if past, present and future all were taking place at the same time.

Or the one I find the likeliest, its an externalization of Pvs doubts manifested, it was never real and wasn't any time travel, that explanation was a lie like most parts of the tower, but his fears are real, and in a space that represents the multitude perspectives of truth, so literally just like Mystic, his Resolution and Apathy separated, but also like Mystic the Apathy part is really bad at doin their job and was actually really passionate about their friends lmao

Now let me live in peace ignorin the stupid time travel some more lol

They should have the capacity to believe they are wrong and thus capable of learning to any degree.

Shadow Milk Cookie: What's happening... Why am I not regaining my power...? The guardian is gone... So why is the blasted tree still standing? Why doesn't Pure Vanilla Cookie... obey?! ***

This isn't evidence of him actually acknowledging that he is wrong in the moment, but it's the foreshadowing of his conclusion, as you surely know by getting to this point lol. He continuously gets presented one lesson over and over and over: Lies cannot modify truth, and it cannot control it. It can manipulate the way knowledge is framed, but it does not modify the truth in any way. And although this lesson will be hammered in more once the foreshadowed part comes around, it's absolutely not a sentiment that's meaningless once you've completed the latest chapter heh.

I'm rapidly losing my capacity to be coherent, but the entirety of Pv's ascension is fighting everythin he knows about, he got tricked, he underestimated truth, he became weaker than pv, he lost to this gang, his spire got destroyed-- the question here is now when that has all been smashed, will we get to him in time or is he just going to reinforce his desperation to repair his status, though given pv's acceptance of deceit i dont expect whatever reperation occurs is not going to be particularly weak to a guy who goes 'yeah well im everything you want to be and i want to be your friend'

Felt like there should at least be an honorable mention for the times where Smilk really starts showing their desire to keep Pv around pre-latest chapter, that once again this wasn't a final minute thing. I should extra elaborate that does not mean that all of these are healthy, appropriate or even definable as 'not bad'. This is mostly the toxic part of toxic yaoi lmao

Shadow Milk Cookie: Eugh, I see you're still so deadfully, painfully, unbreaably... "you"!!!... Thinking much about me these days? ... Pretty cosy, innit? Makes you feel right at home! Why don't you stay for another day? Or... FOREVER! Sit back, relax, and watch my sinister plans unfold from the comfort of your very own prison! Oh? What am I saying? Silly little m! You've always been here, and you always will be! *** Shadow Milk Cookie: Indeed, all this time, you've been my most treasured marionette! ***

And the very final section, is there any evidence contradictory to his ability to be reformed? Is he particularly stubborn about something that would hinder his ability to change his perspective?

And I mean, besides throwing a childish tantrum at the end because he got scared of intimacy? Ig there's one,

Shadow Milk Cookie: Cookies fear what they don't understand. Always so quick to fill that void with the first thing that fits their belief system! Anything, really! Ahh, that would make Knowledge simply the collective agreement on the strongest beliefs, wouldn't you agree? Allow me to demonstrate with these cards.

Which yeah, is pretty antithetical to the idea of knowledge as a virtue, well done smilk you've got 1 whole argument as to why you might struggle with redemption, I'll let you know in 5-10 business years whether that out-stumps all the rest of this dissertation lmao.

My tired gang finishing up last section, don't see naything else that's antithetical to truth or knowledge having popped up at all

Now with all of that out of the way, phew-wee, we can talk about the skin a little bit. We know the skin isn't his Fount of Knowledge time, cause first of all the sage is never referred to as that lol, but secondly they don't look alike, the reason I mentioned the hiding of the past thing on the other two is that Smilk proudly shows off his past and deliberately brings Pv to it, so we know what the fount looks like, and it ain't the sage

So if not the past, what then? Tbh I'm not super confident, if I wanted to be a giddy lil fangirl I could argue that it's the future, that it is what redeemed Smilk will look like, that as the story progresses we will more and more see Smilk, though in all honesty it does just feel like an AU version, he does say "They cookie of truth? That's-a-me" which, yk, wasn't his og virtue and probably won't be his redeemed one either, the story told within talks of a recluse that doesn't exist, the one in the main questline never talks about any mountains, it just feels like a swap au, nothing more. Whatever the option though, I still want to make some inferences, though I do very much recognize that because we don't know who Sage is to the canon that all of this is pretty baseless, but since we're here anyways, why not lol.

The biggest inference is that Truthful Smilk & Present Smilk aren't all that different in behaviour at all "Do I really need to spell out everything? Come on, think!", they're both cheeky "Now now, I'm not like those other Academics", they're both playful "Ooooh, are you proposing a debate? Alright, but no backsies!"-"Think I'm wrong? Very well, present your case!", they both have their convictions "Admitting your ignorance is the first step towards the Truth", they both tease "Why does everyone try so hard to hide their ignorance? Tsk!", they sing-song "The arts, academia, technology, magic...Truth exists everywhere!", both really want to show off their stuff "There you are! Time for some magic!"-- like the only practical difference between the two in their character is what they're believing in, the only other thing i can think of is that sage tends to just make statements a lot more often, thats it. So, going on quite the decent limb, I don't think he needs a full personality or character rewrite to still work as smilk.

Finally, after 12 hours of straight grinding on this: In conclusion, do I think he's currently redeemed, as I'm a bit scared to post this so I feel the need to assure my stance? No, I don't, nor was that my claim. Do I think it will inherently make it a better story if he was redeemed? Not inherently no, but I think it absolutely can be a good story, I don't think it's doomed to fail or doomed to inexplicably ruin the characters involved automatically. By saying I believe he can be redeemed and to some capacity would like to see it, am I excusing all his terrible/abusive behaviour that i skipped over for this analysis as I believe it to be irrelevant to my case? One of us has the wrong definition of redemption then if you think that to be what I'm saying lmao, cause what I'm aware atoning for your sins and crimes are required to be redeemed, a whiplash "I tried to murder you and then suddenly two seconds later I'm nice now" is a bad redemption story at all times and has nothin to do w smilk-- ofc it'd require growth, recognition, self reflection & consequences, ofc his past behaviour would have to be atoned for in whatever way the victims see fit. Do I think I am undermining Pv's experiences/trauma regarding Smilk if he were to be redeemed? Not only do I feel like i adequately listed out the reasons why I don't think he present day canonically doens't hold a grudge towards smilk in the slightest, i would also not think smilk or any of the beasts to be redeemed w/o their other half also accepting them. Do I expect crk to handle the redemption in a good way? No lol