#I DONT EVEN HAVE IRL SO???)
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chris keeps you secure and warm in his arms as the two of you go on a ghibli marathon. he snuggles in closer, lips pressing against the crook of your neck for the tiniest of pecks before he plans another one further up it--just behind your ear. he cuddles you again, eyelashes brushing against your skin as he lets out this blissful sigh.
"comfy?" you tease a little, and you feel him smile against your skin.
"mmhm," he wraps his arms around you a little tighter, leaning back into the couch even more. "you?"
you squirm just a little to readjust, and relax into him as you enjoy the warmth of his embrace. it becomes just more apparent how badly the two of you needed a cozy, happy movie night like this. "mhm. i'm perfect."
"i know," he giggles. he reaches toward where the blanket has slipped, and carefully readjusts it so that the two of you are nice and snug again. "it's okay if you fall asleep, by the way," he mumbles. "i've got you."
(he falls asleep first anyway. he always does, but you're never far behind when you listen to the sound of his heart beating in his chest. maybe you'll pick the movies back up another day.)
#nonranghaes.thoughts#stray kids x reader#stray kids fluff#stray kids imagines#stray kids x you#stray kids imagine#chris bang x reader#chris bang fluff#bang chan x you#bang chan x reader#bang chan fluff#nonranghaes.skz#i missed the movie date w chris on bubble yesterday so take this instead </3#i dont even care abt a romantic date w him i just wanna have a completely platonic date w him irl#where we just watch ghibli movies and casually talk sometimes bc i feel like he def talks during movies
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i finished it, was kicked out of the game, and then spent the next 10 minutes drawing this. i will now go take a shower, most likely cry, and then go through the emotional turmoil of convincing myself to reset so i can do a geno run. i hate it here :D
#undertale yellow#uty#my art#<- ifg#spoilers under these tags beware. although it is mostly just me being very very sad#that entire thing was heart wrenching. anyways#CEROBAS FIGHT??? HELLO???#i had to exit out of it the first time (i got to the last phase) to get better items but i came back and won pretty quickly#but THE CUTSCENES?!?!?#JFC NO WONDER THIS WOMANS SO MESSED UP. HER HUSBAND PRACTICALLY DIED IN HER ARMS AND THE LAST THING HE LEFT HER WITH- HIS DYING WISH- COULD#ONLY BE FULFILLED BY PUTTING THEIR ONLY CHILD IN DEATHS WAY. AND THEN WHEN SHE TOOK THAT RISK THE WORST THING HAPPENED AND SHE NOW HAS TO#LIVE WITH THE GUILT OF BEING THE ONE TO. MOST LIKELY. KILL HER ONE AND ONLY DAUGHTER#ALL THE WHILE SHE WAS PUSHING AWAY HER CHILDHOOD BEST FRIEND AND CONVINCING HERSELF THAT SHE WAS IN THE RIGHT TO SACRIFICE CLOVER WHO HAD#BEEN ONLY KIND MERCIFUL AND JUST THIS WHOLE TIME. EVEN TO THOSE WHO WERE TRYING TO KILL THEM. FUCK.#AAND WHEN CLOVER HUGGED HER I DOUBLED OVER IRL BC *THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED TO DO IN THAT MOMENT* I HATE IT (read: love it) HERE#n dont even get me STARTED on after that. when clover started moving on their own and the gd white screen came up and we got flashbacks of#everyone's words. thats when the tears rlly started coming bc it clicked for me. 'oh. this is it. isn't it?' and IT WAS#WHEN THEY GAVE THEIR FUCKIGN HAT AND GUN AWAY TO MARTLET AND STARLO WELL THATS WHEN I REALLY STARTED CRYING#AAND THE GROUP HUGG#I WAS SOBBING WHENEVER I HAD TO WATCH THEM CRAWL UP AGAINST THE WALL AND DIE AND HAVE FLOWEYS WORDS PLAY OVERHEAD#AND THE FUCKOGN#THE F U C K I N G#AFTEWRCREDITS SCENE WHERE WE GOT THE 'You heard someone calling for help. You answered.' I GOT CHILLS SO BAD#to think that all the other souls have stories just as expansive and emotional as clover n frisks. how fucked up is that. in a good way tho#and finally the last scene where we got all 4 of our main friends sending us off in waterfall and we see clovers items end up in the dump#just waiting to be found by bratty and catty. fucken hell man this was a masterpiece#anyways time to reset and obliterate everyone and never emotionally recover from that ever!! really is feeling like 2016-17 again w the way#this game has me sobbing my eyes out and feeling the guilt of knowing that i dont HAVE to kill them all but im too curious not to#oh well. at least i have the balls to do it this time around instead of letting a youtuber do it for me ig
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i think one reason some lgbt people are very intense with their identities online is because they don't get to express themselves in a sufficient way irl or at all due to lgbtphobic environment, lack of queer friends, self-repression, guilt, etc etc. so for that reason if you wanna make being gay a personality on your blog then idgaf go ahead the world is cruel enough to you, this is your space and you can do whatever you want
#at least this is the case for me#i need to larp a straight girl 24/7 and wear things i dont like for my safety irl so if u see me enacting down bad dykery online thats just#the repression breaking out.#mochats#lesbian#queer talk at 3 am#we need to stop scrambling for material or philosophical value to anything we do. some people just go on here to have fun in ways they-#-couldnt irl#be the horrible repulsive passionate lesbian you want to see in the world#and i mean it with my heart#even if ur not repressed irl u still get to be free btw
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in my dream last night they released a bill cipher themed soda called Decipher and I tried to go get some but insane wacky nonsense kept interrupting me before I could. I mean the nonsense had to do with the plot of the rest of the dream but it just kept showing up at the exact moment that I was about to get my soda. Ive just remembered the plot of the rest of the dream was that all of the straw hat piratds were there at tbis theme park we were in and some other group of pirates were trying to bully nico robin. the other pirate group was goth btw. their captain almost died from getting splashed with acid (by nico robin) (it was justified). But I didnt see that happen bc really I was mostly focused on getting my dumb soda.
#dream journal#yeah oh my god it was like. a one piece pre timeskip filler episode was happening at the same time as the rest of my dream. wild#and I was a part of the straw hat crew??? or friends with them or something???? i kept getting lost th#oh my god was i zoro. was i fucking zoro. i dont remember seeing zoro was i zoro and i didnt realize it??? help#zoro wants that stupid bill cipher soda . god damn it i remember wondering if it was alcoholic i think i was zoro and didnt even register#im lsoing it thats so funny. usually when im a character in my dreams i like. Know It. but being zoro didnt feel any different I guess 😂😂#god no there were definitely parts where i was me or i tjought i was me. and my irl friends wer ethere also.#i guess it was one of those dumb fading in and out things that happens in dreams sometimes#it did kinda feel like i was having two dreams at once#still i dont think i ever registered that anything was different when i was zoro so thats really fucking funny#and there was this whole 3rd plot line with made up people i dont know irl or from fiction.#it was kind of like sky high but completely different and with less white people...gah i dont rlly rember
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today's hot take for dog people: management is not the same thing as training.
#dogblr#unpopular opinion: a lot of the current flavour of dog 'training' is actually just management#does your dog know how to make a good decision? does your dog know what a good decision even is?#or is your dog under such heavy management that they never ever have to make a decision on their own?#YES set your dog and yourself up for success!!!! absolutely!!!!#but (unpopular take) errorless learning is detrimental to overall wellbeing#stress is a part of life and of your dog crumples when they experience A Stress then you have a serious problem#teach resilience as a skill#dont misunderstand this on purpose#im not saying let your dog run wild unruly unmanaged#im saying train your skills and then trust your training#when it is safe to do so let your dog make a decision#(this is not in response to anyone on here#i am casual irl acquaintances with a service dog handler and i do not respect her handling/training/management#i am very frustrated with the lack of nuance between training vs management#and the beautiful space where they overlap#people who are here from Not The Dog World#management is setting up your environment so your dog makes the decision you want#eg using a long line so your dog has no choice but to come when called#training is teaching your dog to make the decision you want them to make#ideally you would use both (management while training) but the current flavour of dog training#tends to put all responsibility on you as the person#to manage your environment so the dog never has the opportunity to make a mistake#instead of training your dog so they understand what the 'right' choice is and WANT to choose that most of the time#i am braced for the deliberate misunderstandings that are likely to come out of this post#THERE IS NUANCE PEOPLE
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do you ever think about how all you used to draw when you were 10 was ponies and that you should still know how to do that, then get an idea and proceed to draw something like these in nearly one sitting and it turns out better than any drawing you've done in the entire past month
sooo anyway does anyone have cutie mark or pony name ideas for them?? lol
#(the b girl lineups are older than a month because i procrastinated a lot on doing minor fixes. nothing i drew in the month of june 2024#is really worth showing it's all shitty doodles lmao)#bnha#class 1b#mlp#?#yui kodai#setsuna tokage#itsuka kendo#ibara shiozaki#(i love how she came out in particular! creature :3)#reiko yanagi#tikto's art#you may be wondering why pony of all people isn't here.#i did draw her! but i kind of ran out of steam so i ended up not really liking the result lol same for kinoko#anyway shoutout to elementary school me i was SO obsessed with mlp. brony stuff was one of the first things i used the internet for#and you know what. i wouldn't say it ruined me it was a pleasant experience#i just read what was basically a polish version of equestria daily and constantly checked the deviantart profile of one (1) specific artist#that i liked a lot#i did watch some weird speedpaints (yknow the horror ones) but i honestly dont remember being very bothered by them i just liked the art#i was just chilling there lurking and never actively participating due to being 10 and afraid of online strangers (good for me tbh)#i remember having an identity crisis though because can i really call myself a brony if i'm a little girl? the target audience of the show?#lmao anyway i would also draw ponies constantly and write oc fanfics (and the ocs were actually my irl friends ponified)#and i even had my own little g5 concept. good times good times#tag story time over god bless enjoy your day
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i might be shot but tbh i think fiction podcasts have an issue with racial representation
#monstrous agonies n travelling light have allegory but allegory is still just allegory#mabel n wolf 359 r the only fucking podcasts ive seen in which where someone is from actually affects them#not to mention how many popular audio dramas are made by white people? might just be my experience idk#and they still seemingly have representation bc the fandom draws the characters as poc even if the actor isnt#which would be completely differentif it was tv or smthn#like ofc ppl can draw whatever they want but theres something to that disconnect that is strange to me#also the penumbra approach of actively avoiding race as a theme in the podcast#magnus in general?? they might be improving a little with protocol but i have not seen people addressing it a lot#and of course the cecil palmer effect#this is in large part due to the audio only medium#but its weird to see a medium praised for queer rep have race almost entirely ignored in favor of setting the world in somewhere w/o racism#maybe its bc so much is set in less irl settings so people feel like its more ok to distance themselves from these issues#but still?? for example hallowoods (havent finished it so dont come at me if this changed later in the podcast)#theres the blatant evangelical christianity allegory and all the transphobia n homophobia is dealt with but not white supremacy?#which seems lacking if its trying to criticize that particular sect of christianity#n malevs complete ignorance of lovecraft#and if youre going to set it in the 1920-1930s america why arent you dealing with the time period#just a rant i havent done deep research into this or anything. dont kill me#podcasts
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every time i see some one genuinely get mad at kaboodle for an autistic trait i get one second closer to crashing out
#so close to losing my shit ☹️☹️☹️#fuck sexism and fuck abelism holy shit#if they dont hate on kaboodle because she’s a woman it’s for some typically autistic trait#(her having a hard time with tone and shit)#even if it’s them getting mad at the character it . still shows the fact they would probably get mad at some one irl for that too#kaboodle#lssmp#main tagging this because i want people to genuinely think about this
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Ok I know I'm heavily biased here but like I kinda love that Astarion's romance is one of the few in this type of video game where you basically end up canonically unmarried and childfree in his "good" ending? Just travelling the world??
Like it's honestly the millennial dream lmfaoo cannot believe i chose what would undoubtedly be my favorite option, first try
#also love that he's basically atheist like ok thanks you made the man exactly coded to be my type#and the humor and beautiful curly hair is very much something my IRL partner has too so like... how can i resist#anyways not sure a lot of people relate cause i think a lot of people want that fairytale romance#even tho wyll is right there yall#but i love me an unconventional or nontraditional one!!#i'm TIRED of being married with children as the endgame pls let's not do it#also a lot of people seem into him being a dad and im like... how? why? where in canon did he ever lmfao#more power to ya if you dig it but i just dont see it being in character#like in DAI i loved cullen and my inquisitor getting married and having a dog#and they seem the type to wants kids one day. but Tav & Astarion? lol no#i just think it's neat#is this a hot take? i have no idea but i don't see it mentioned a lot as a new fan tbh#pls do not come at me you can enjoy whatever you like#i haven't seen the ascended stuff so idk if being his 'consort' is like being his bride#but i feel like overall it's not and the vibe isn't all that different in this sense#except that you're hosting evil parties instead of travelling :/#Astarion#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#bg3#also YEA he's nice to Arabella but you can tolerate certain kids without wanting one or being 'good parent' material#case in point: me lmfao#OKAY update i saw the AA stuff and yeah you're kind of implied vamp married and he does mention spawn as children 😫#but he also says in banter he won't make any other spawn??? so what is it dude#anyway that's also clearly the “bad” route and he doesn't seem as happy as unascended#who feels “truly free”#and if you're durge I'm pretty sure its even worse to consider having kids?? lol#but i digress#pk plays bg3
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being too weird and unlikable and off putting and always being shunned and turned into an outcast everywhere i go and not having felt the connection and healing friendship has on you for so many years has really done a number on me
#irl mostly. but even online. i cannot connect or find communities or support systems the way most of u can#even if i do have found great connections and one connection in particular im more than grateful for#but i have had so much of my humanness torn off for so long that i am awkward and useless in handling it#but yeah idk :/ im just so profoundly jealous of how everyone can just fit into a slot#even online when ppl talk abt being anxious and stuff they still have ppl to talk to#or ppl irl to hang out with and im like.. wow... i cant even do that :/#it is just so lonely in general. and it has made me confused and incapable of knowing how to be a human#and fully realise and actualize the one connection i do have#if i had gotten to learn and now know how to be a human and a person i would've... been a person#but now i feel so removed and far away from that idek how...#like im at a point where i cant even have simple and shallow conversations online bc im like so useless#maybe only other ppl with avpd and who have been socially rejected and isolated and alienated can fully understand what i mean#it is so scary and weird and i feel such deep envy for how people can just like... talk to eo. irl and online. i dont get it#and like the connection i do have that i mention bc it is so important to me.. that does all of those things#but it is like im so not used to anyone even keep wanting to have a connection with me#that i feel like bambi on ice 💀 for lack of a better metaphor#and inside of me idk how to dare to open up to it bc i've been numb and shut off i just dont know#i dont know. but i want to but idk how.#ahhhhhh wanna scream bc just trying to describe it so i can make sense of it is frustrating!!!!#it also sucks bc other ppl really dont seem to get how fkn weird and scary it is to feel so removed from humanness#and not even be able to do most basic human people things most ppl who are mentally ill or anxious do.. i cant even do that idk#talking and communicating is the main thing like ppl do not understand how fkn hard it is for me to even have a simple convo#and i cant explain it bc theres no way someone who doesnt feel the same and have avpd could get it...#but idk. i just hate all of this and i wish i had a normal functioning brain. i just wanna be like everyone else#even ppl w social anxiety are capable of having friends. and im terrified of losing the only connection i've somehow been lucky to get#in my hands??? im so scared of losing that but idk HOW to be a person and idk!!! idk!!#other ppl dont even think abt these things im so fkn jealous lmao#anyway whatever 😔
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i know i am not at all a big creator i'm just some guy with some internet access and an account and friends but even then all of this, fandom, internet fun, its all become so incredibly insufferable to be in? the only reason i made a tumblr was so i could post my art online and maybe get some validation and silly for it, and because there were strangers on the internet who would share the same opinions as me and we could interact via shared interests and love for content we both enjoy but never actually ever know each other personally and as someone whos been in the undertale fandom since i was like. a genuine child, how did fandom culture go from fun and joyous to genuinely exhausting and like walking through a landmine? i understand trying to weed out all the genuinely shitty people, but like, atleast on my side with my friends, and of course one of the bigger online presences in them being kia, why is it so unimaginable that people are friends with eachother outside of fandom discourse that doesnt hold a single candle to anything in real life? i'll tell you this much; whatever shit my friends like to draw doesn't do anything to me in the real world all of this "blocklist" shit (which, by the way, never has to be made public, if you really want a blocklist make it in private or dm people if they want it), is so dangerous and it's absolutely insane and incredible to me that nobody in the rabid anti spaces can see it as a genuine danger that has real world consequences until things don't exactly go "the way they wanted" why are you airing out, generally average and pretty fucking normal, people and artists around on a list expecting whoever's on the internet to see it and have an ounce of etiquette? and, actually, why are you even willing to put out public lists in the first place? does it not fill you with regret? i fucking hate dreammare as a ship and i dont like the shit that people would consider proship, if anything i'm pretty normal, i just dont give a fuck about what people do in their own little spaces because i can choose not to go in there. so why are you choosing to put me out on a list as if i personally hurt you? like i drew incest brothers and sisters kissing with nsfw written all over it or some shit? brother the only social media that i post publicly on for the world to see is this one!! tldr please leave me the fuck alone and have some idk, sympathy? i dont look on tumblr much, i'm busy you know, living on my own barely a year after turning 18, its not very fun running the risk of harassment, and knowing that people are stalking you and your friendgroup constantly over shit that doesn't fucking matter to you
#beef meister#this was kind of all over the place#im just fucking tired??? i dont know dude#its like people see “oh god someone doesnt want to be apart of exhausting hateful discourse!! they obviously ship incest!!!”#have you ever considered that maybe someone just doesnt like hate#or hating others#i dont care about what people think of me and i dont think anyone cares about what i think of them unless i know them personally#i only follow people on tumblr for their artwork and content because it caters to my interests#shocking announcement that someone doesnt let internet drama run their life and how they view their relationships with others#its also annoying#considering the fact most of the people doing dumb shit like this are younger than me#but at their age i still had half the fucking brain to you know#be a decent human being#i genuinely cannot understand nor fathom how you have the energy to hold so much hate for people you will never meet irl#i dont even have the energy to hate my abusers bro what fent are you all taking#rant over i guess#leave me out of your stupid fucking chronically online drama that i literally dont care about!!!!! i use tumblr to bring myself joy#so leave me out!!!!!!!!!!!! dont fucking talk about me regarding that shit nor ask me about it i dont FUCKING CARE!!!!!!!!!
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"fandom discourse isnt that serious" yeah duh but i feel like i should be allowed to talk about things like people being misogynistic or justifying abuse without being told im complaining too much or something, when these are such extremely prevalent issues in fandom 😭
#also idk about you guys but complaining is fun to me#like. being super negative and focusing solely on that isnt fun but that isnt me#maybe thats how some people might see it but thats not how it is from my perspective#i like to enjoy lots of fandom content and then when i see something that rubs me the wrong way i like to get my feelings out#so i block then post about it and then move on#its really not as deep as people make it seem#you dont have to follow me and can even block me if my page is too negative for you <3#other things i complain about are usually me talking about not having good experiences in the fandom#like being told my characterization of saiki is wrong by people who literally didnt understand a word of saiki k#which i feel is valid of me to complain about lol#ok whatever the point is. literally just leave me alone LMAO#this is kind of a vent i guess#someone irl said this to me and i felt inclined to talk about it here because people have said this on here too#also im autistic so a lot of it truly just is that serious to me LMAOODODNDKEKD#meows post
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maybe this will get rocks thrown at me but i kinda hate when people call the 18+ prisoners "grown adults" as insults and ways to like... shut down any sympathy with them. how because they are "grown adults", they "should have known better". this has just always bothered me. i see it and i have to sit and stare at the wall for 10 minutes.
like. idk. being an adult does not automatically give you skills like Emotional Regulation, Impulse Control, Ability To Learn From Consequences, Ability To Plan For The Future, Critical Thinking, Interpersonal Skills, etc etc. you have to be Taught these things no matter how old you are. if you are not taught these things, and you are not supported in an environment that helps you further develop these things... you just. Aren't gonna be able to do them well.
adults just, typically, have accumulated enough experiences in life to have been able to learn these things. but not every adult has had that privilege. or some adults have had to just shut off the parts of their brain that would allow them to learn these things to be able to function at a basic level.
#milgram meta#when i see someone use the phrase ''grown adult'' in a derogatory way i just. can no longer even listen to them mfkfmsdf#me when no matter how hard i try i cant be a functional adult and then i just get insulted and dismissed instead of helped.#only leading me further into my pit of Despair#like. listen. i get this is a fictional piece of media. and at the end of the day i genuinely dont care That much. but also.#the way ppl think and talk about these things. even if its fictional. usually (but not always. im aware!) still reflects how they think irl#so Thats why i feel genuinely hurt when i see people talk like this.#but alas. i Am a grown adult so maybe i should just suck it up--#i simply should have utilized my DBT skills instead of allowing myself to develop mental illness /lhj#i did not have a good therapy session today (in fact it was fucking awful lol) so now i must Post Online#if you dont see me for a month. its because my traumas and mental illnesses unionized
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ppl who dont understand loving a character while also hating them fascinate me, clearly youve never stanned a complete and absolute dickhead before
#mine.txt#i mean the char doesnt have to be That much of an asshole to be someone you both love and hate ofc#but once youve gone to that extreme theres basically nothing stopping you from indulging in whatever feeling a char gives you#regardless of assholery#this was ages ago so idr where i found them#but like there was this person who couldnt believe that ppl would actually stan villains and not just the heroes cause they were evil 😭#i think?? i found them on youtube???#idk its been a while#but that baffled me cause even when i was a kid thanks to my interest in noir and darker media#i had a streak of being a fan of morally grey asshole characters#who were like. Objectively assholes who i can gurantee Nobody would like irl no ifs ands or buts about it#but who were still really interesting and complex and flawed#you didnt like them cause they were nice or good or even Likeable#you liked them cause on Some degree you respected or at the very least were entertained by them#whether it be their integrity; their conviction; their goals; their audacity; their suffering; etc#there was always Something that intrigued you#you may not like them on a personal standpoint but they put on a good show and thats what matters#unfortnately it was also common for chars from these media to be laced with bigotry but its just how it goes im afraid#theres a few that dont really contain those but they tend to be either hidden gems or for younger audiences#idk i should watch and play noir stuff again i think i missed them#like that kinda stuff heavily colored my preferences in things
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I really wish Venus's doll had sneakers similar to Clawdeen's original core doll. Still with the mouth detail, and maybe vine-like laces, and a leaf shaped tongue.
#monster high#monster high dolls#monster high gen 3#venus mcflytrap#i dont love her outfit overall but her shoes really ruin it for me#they could have been really cool but idk i think the designers dropped the ball a bit#the weird pink to gray gradient is very awkward to me but g3 loves its shoe gradients for some reason#im looking at a close up picture now and the details are actually nice they'd look a lot better if they were all black#and cut at the ankle#im anxious at work so im rambling about small things dont mind me#text post#even tho i actively dislike clawdeens original core doll i LOVE her sneakers to death#genuinely might be my favorite pair of doll shoes ever i want them irl#g3 is very good when it comes to sneaker designs which is why im craving more#hopefully she'll get another doll that'll have cool sneakers
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update
sent around 70 orders since my previous update! still slowly chipping away the rest, theres so much left
also. i already kinda talked about this on twitter in detail but:
.
.
to the customer who first told me they didnt know my book was a preorder, and didnt know i wrote an estimated shipping date on my faq, and if they knew earlier they wouldnt have bought it because it was for their niece's birthday which has now passed:
you wrote back again recently asking for updates when i previously mentioned it would take the same 2-3 weeks. i cant even send you your order beforehand because i didnt even have the books. but when i finally did i sent out your copy the next day instantly. i dont understand why you filed a paypal claim (under "item not received") against me on the same day i shipped out your order. and you even lied about me on the dispute notes which i can obviously read on my end. you asked for shipping info in which i cant even really send anything because you actively chose not to have your package tracked, and you are never satisfied with any answer i had my friends give you :(
i implore you to just reach out to me personally here but you dont even reply to emails anymore. if you feel vindicated bullying a small artist trying to share their works to people then you've did it because i give up.
im sorry i dont know what you want from me.
#im having such a rough time irl lately where i couldnt eat or sleep properly. i've attempted on overdose. i lost a family member#but i still wanted to fulfill the shop responsibility because everyone's counting on me#genuinely i know there will be nice people outweighing the bad ones but i dont feel like doing this anymore#and if i were to sell my art again it would just be between friends#faq#edit: truth be told i never even really wanted to sell my book because i made it as a commemorative item for my late friend#but a lot of people wanted it and asked for it so i thought okay i will do this for the people who asked#because if im in a position to spread a little joy in the world in the form of my art i wanna do it#but then people/experiences like this happens and i feel like i disappointed my friend
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